10 truths to help you overcome

the anxieties of Christmas

By Victor Du Bois

Celebrating Christmas is not

mandatory.
Though the story about our saviors birth is a good thing
(Luke 2:9-10), no where in the Bible does it command
us to celebrate Christs birth on an annual basis. If you
just do not want to deal with all the pressures associated
with our modern day Christmas season, take a break.
God will not frown on you for your lack of excitement
and participation. As Christians, we can read about and
celebrate the love of Jesus anytime and anywhere we
please. We do not need a certain day on the calendar to
dictate our actions. (Col 2:16-17)
If others frown on your lack of excitement, just be truthful
with them and say I need to take a break from it all and
spend some one-on-one time with God.

Is there really such thing as

the Christmas Spirit?
The concept of a Christmas Spirit is very
subjective. Some may say that it is the spirit of
Gods love. Some may say it is the spirit of
giving. And others may see it as a good feeling you get
with egg nog and mistletoe. If you just cant seem to get
that Christmas Spirit feeling, dont sweat it. Again, as
Christians we are not directed by the scriptures to feel
good and full of cheer at this time of year. There are
many reasons why you may not want to sing Jingle
Bells and string up those pesky strands of lights. Perhaps
you lost a loved one or had your hours reduced at the
factory. Maybe the commercial side of Christmas has you

frustrated. Just be courteous with others and do not pop

there holly jolly bubbles of joy. In Gods time you will be
able to rejoice as He gives you victory over the trials of
life.

Depression without Guilt

Do not let depression fill you with guilt.
Depression is a natural part of your spiritual
journey. No Holiday can effectively revive you like the
promises of God and His Holy Spirit. If you look closely in
the Bible you will see that the perfect Son of God, Jesus
experienced times of depression and sorrow as did many
of his disciples (Isa 53:3, Heb 2:17-18, John 11:33-36).
Depression can be an opportunity for us to call on Gods
mercy and watch him work miracles in our lives. In Christ,
we always have hope for he said that He would never
leave us or forsake us (Heb 13:5). So if you are emotionally
walking in the valley, do not look at it as a punishment
from God. It is a period of spiritual growth that God is
using to shape you and prepare you for helping others
with the same challenges. Many Christians go through
depression at Christmas time. Dont hide it from others
who love you. Let them know why you feel the way you
do. Seek Gods guidance and strength and dont let Satan
burden you with guilt. God promises to turn your
mourning into joy (Jer 31:13-14, Esther 9:22, John
15:11).

The Santa Trap?

Kids can handle the truth.
Folks may not realize it, but when you teach
your children that Santa Clause is real, you have trapped
yourself into expectations that you may never be able to
live up to. The pressure of putting on this act and giving
your children that ear-to-ear smile when they open gifts
is much more than many of us can handle. Especially
when things are tight, you have to make up lies to cover
Santas weaknesses. Then the children become more
frustrated and they feel that they have failed some how.
I recommend you let your children know as soon as they
can understand that Santa is a fun game of pretend. Let
them know that he is a fictional character inspired by
some kind hearted men from the past. Once your children
realize this, you can be truthful with them when things
are tight. They will understand more clearly if you let
them know that many other expenses that benefit them
(heating bill, groceries, school clothes) are a priority and
sometimes there is not much left after all bills are paid.
You will be amazed at how understanding your children
will be when you are truthful with them. One year, I
wanted to buy a bicycle for my daughter and did not
have enough money. I gave her a greeting card with an
I.O.U. for a bicycle in it and got it for her in the Spring. In
Michigan, you cant ride a bicycle in the Winter very well
anyhow. She was OK with that, and we had an enjoyable
time after all.

Cards and Gifts?

Dont over do it.
I used to have this fear of offending someone
by not sending them a greeting card for Christmas. My
list for sending cards was really long with (friends, cousins,
aunts, uncles, second cousins, work mates, etc.), it could
be a real drudgery to fulfill that mailing list on an annual
basis. Over time we have really trimmed down the list to
the essentials. And sometimes we just dont get around
to it until after Christmas. In that case we add... And a
Happy New Year. Why beat yourself over the head with
guilt for not getting all the cards out on time. I must
admit, I have become very lacks in this area and
appreciate e-mail for sending greetings now. All in all,
we must not allow guilt to creep in when we fall short of
our own expectations when it comes to holiday traditions.
Remember that Jesus said that His yoke is easy and His
burden is light (Matt 11:28-30). He truly does not expect
us to bog ourselves down with holiday customs just for
obligation sake. Just remember to tell the people you
love how special they are no matter what time of year it
is.
I have found that most adults are not demanding when
it comes to gifts at Christmas parties. Usually, we all just
love to see that the children enjoy themselves. I look
forward to the food and fellowship the most. Buying
gifts for every party and every purpose can really weigh
heavy on your pocket book. If you cant afford it dont do
it! You may suggest that the adults just throw in a few
bucks into a collection for a local charity. Or, have a dollar
store gift exchange for fun. We sometimes like to get
some inexpensive odd gift that will bring laughs to a
party. And if you simply cant attend without an impressive
gift, stay home and know that you were brave enough
to do what many others wish they had the guts to do. A
good excuse that works for me, if someone asks Why
werent you at the party?, simply say, I had other plans.
Usually that will suffice. Others understand that you cant
make it to every event on the calendar.

Gifting Options
Unless you get a thrill out of bumping shoulders
with a zillion strangers at mega-sales, shopping for
Christmas gifts just may not be your cup of tea. Join the
club. Many people put it off until the last minute for several
reasons. You may be low on dough, dreading the
decisions, or fear hearing the song, Santa Baby played
over and over on the mall intercom.

First of all, the most meaningful gifts will come from your
heart, wether they are wrapped in paper or wrapped in
sincerity. Dont pretend to be wealthy to impress anyone.
Dont pay for everything with plastic just to postpone
the head aches. Be truthful to yourself and your family.
You may only be able to afford sharing a dream with
someone you love, yet how meaningful that could be.
What I mean is, sometimes I will share with my wife that
I would love to build her the kitchen of her dreams
Perhaps someday, should God bless us with the extra
income. And she may say to me, I would buy you a
Jeep if I had the money too. We dont get depressed
over what we dont have. But knowing that we can share
each others dreams and make them future goals,
strengthens our marriage.
If you are able, make the children your priority. Get them
things that they need. If you dont have the funds, check
with the local charities early so that you can wrap the
gifts and have them ready for your family party. If you
dont have a local charity that can help, dont hesitate to
write, call or e-mail a reputable ministry. Remember, the
son of God depended on the kindness of strangers too
(Matt 25:34-36, Matt 25:40). Do not feel ashamed for
relying on charity now and then. Most everyone
experiences times when ends are hard to meet.
Trading can often work as well. If you can offer a service
in payment for something you desire to give, that is not
as uncommon as you may think. Perhaps you could detail
a few vehicles for a local car dealer in exchange for a
windshield installed in your mothers pickup. You get the
idea. Or if you have a few extra bucks, but not much
time, shop by catalog. And, local merchants who know
you by name, may extend a little credit to you with no
interest if you just ask.

Home for the Holidays ... You

cant Please Everyone.
Heated debates on where your family is going
to spend Christmas day is quite unnecessary.
Nothing puts a dark cloud over a special day like
resentment. Your first priority if you have a family is ...
Your Family. If the travel is just to tiring and expensive,
save it for later. Do not stress over how the in-laws or
outlaws will feel about it. Give the kids ample time to talk
to grandparents by phone if they wont see them in
person. Or have them write a meaningful letter and pop
it into a card to mail. Perhaps a video recording or the
family on DVD would be a nice way to give of yourself
to those far away. Or, even send family photos via email. There are so many ways to touch those you love

when you cant all be together. Relationally diverse families

with half-sisters, step moms, great uncles, x-husbands
with joint custody and so on will make your holiday
planning difficult. You could never please everyone and
stay financially afloat, let alone sane. You may have to
make some hard fast rules that limit you to so many parties
a year and take turns each year as to where and with
whom you will celebrate.
If you happen to be in a situation that keeps you away
from your family for a long period of time. Just do your
best to let them know that you miss them and that they
are in your prayers. Christmas should not fill you with
depression about what you wish you could do, but can
not. Use the time you are away from your loved ones to
draw closer to God and fill your heart with His word. He
will give you strength through it all.

A Merry LITTLE Christmas

Christmas can be a bit overwhelming
sometimes, so how about downsizing? Put up
a smaller tree that takes less decorations and less time to
complete. Send cards only to close family and connect
with your cousins and friends another time. Give one or
two gifts to each family member instead of a truckload.
Skip the mega-light show on your front porch this year.
Make homemade decorations instead of buying new.
Buy or make half the cookies you usually do and call it
your Christmas diet. Skip a few parties and take the time
to go sledding with the kids. You get the idea.

The ideas I have shared above may work sometimes, but

how about when you and your spouse dont agree.
Perhaps you can negotiate on a few nonessentials. Or
dont feel embarrassed when one spouse desires to stay
home. People understand that we all have our limits and
we cant be all Ho, Ho, Ho-ing. every time there is a
party to attend. Just explain that the other half was not
feeling up to the task and needed a little time to rest.

Be Truthful.
If you are just not prepared to meet Christmas
head on with Jingle Bells and the whole
shmear, dont hide it from friends and family. Let them
know that this year may be a bit different. You may not
be able to abide by everyones wishes. You will be
trimming costs and taking time to do other things not
on the itinerary. Truth will reduce the pressure and you
will not have to work overtime to prove anything to
anyone. (John 8:32 & 36, 2 Cor 5:9-10, Gal 1:10, ) Just,
dont forsake a time of worship and thanks in your local
church. I have found that the times when I least want to
go to the church and I go anyway, are the times when
God has a special blessing waiting for me there. A brother
or sister in Gods family may approach you with words of

healing and encouragement that will make all the

difference. Or, God may speak to you through a song or
sermon.

Jesus Understands.
Though Jesus was the sinless son of God,
he had days when it was a physical, mental or emotional
challenge to make it through. He was known to go to a
quite place and regroup now and then. He honored the
customs of the day to the best of his ability and
understood the needs of those who surrounded him.
(Heb 4:15-16) Yet He too relied on guidance from his
Father during times of great trial.
As Christians, each day is part of a greater journey. Each
day is a bridge closer to fulfilling Gods will in our life. We
must not degrade anyone as being a Scrooge when
they are not full of Christmas Cheer. And if you need to
take a detour from the traditional Christmas pageantry,
do not feel guilty about it. Guilt is the major tool Satan
will use to turn your heart towards despair. Jesus can
relate to your circumstance and offers you hope, not
frustration. Rest in the promises of our Lord. Only he can
satisfy our soul. (Ps 37:4, John 10:10)

This pamphlet is dedicated to my many friends who struggle with the expectations of a secular
Christmas. God bless you as you grow in His grace.
Special thanks to Chaplain, Tom Hammond for scripture research.
Copyright 2006 NewPage Publishing
(Permission to reproduce this pamphlet is granted for non profit ministry only)
www.newpage.net