S

HELP yourself

For shopping addicts overspending is often seen as the height

HAZARDOUS

waist

We all know being overweight is not

good for us but recent findings indicate
that where the fat is stored has particular
implications for your health.
By Lynne Gidish

MONEY CAN T
By Dominic Cadden

BUY ME LOVE
Whoever said money cant buy happiness probably didnt have a platinum credit
card. While some people say shopping is better than sex, psychologists warn that
excessive shopping can tip people over the edge into a destructive addiction.
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of self-indulgence and theres not much wrong with that or

so their thinking goes. Alcoholics, drug and gambling addicts
attract more sympathy because their problems are supposedly
beyond their control. Despite a push by
an increasing number of professionals
studying oniomania (the medical term for
shopping addiction), the condition is not
listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, the American
register of recognised mental health conditions. It retains the
rating of obsessive-compulsive disorder.
It comes down to disability, says Carl Zabel, who is
doing a study at the University of Melbourne into the
psychological factors of compulsive buying. Its not how
much money people spend or how much time they spend
shopping that pushes them into this category, its the extent
of disability or dysfunction it causes in their lives.
Its not surprising that shopping addiction is mostly
associated with women. For women, shopping is often a
pleasant activity that is part of their socialisation process,
says Zabel. If compulsive behaviour is a way of dealing with
unwanted emotions, or a way of making yourself feel better,
then men go for other potentially addictive activities such as
gambling or drinking.
Psychologist John Falcon has directed programmes for
several addiction treatment facilities in the US and Australia,
including programmes for compulsive spending.
Shopping addiction can be closely related to sex
addiction, he says. Both are similar in their compulsive
behaviour and sufferers inability to delay gratification. When
sex addicts are overwhelmed by intolerable feelings, they use
sex to feel good about themselves. Shopping addicts do the
same. Both are secrets that people feel ashamed of. We want
them to expose those secrets to themselves first and then
communicate them to family members.
Falcon says that as with other recognised addictions, he
considers compulsive shopping a brain disease. When addicts
shop they experience an endorphin-driven high.
Supporting this view, a recent New Scientist magazine
article stated that excessive behaviour, including shopping,
seems to trigger a similar rise in dopamine release in the
brain as the one prompted by sex or illicit drugs such as
cocaine, ecstasy and amphetamines. Dopamine is a chemical
released by the brain during pleasurable experiences.
Compulsive shoppers also express the same kind
of physical withdrawal symptoms associated with other
addictions, such as depression, sweating and hallucinations.
For Olinda, 23, a student, withdrawal meant a feeling of
constant suffocating after two weeks without shopping.
Although her income varies greatly she often earns just
R60000 a year from her casual job in the family business
she says, Its like shopping helps me breathe. The cost of
such ventilation is high and Olinda remembers one splurge
on beauty products that set her back R2100 a small
fortune for someone on her income.
Kim, 34, describes herself as a degree-qualified,
intelligent ex-professional. She worked in PR but now
describes herself as a lady of leisure while living in the
Netherlands where her husband has been posted. Even six

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years after her lowest point (when her credit card debt
amounted to R350000 at a time when she was earning
R450000 a year), Kim can only hope her brain will one day
turn off its constant urge to purchase.
I know that I hurt my husband when I have the
occasional binge, she says. I would love to learn how to save
money and enjoy life without needing to go to shops all the
time. At the same time, she says, My husband is so generous.
He wants me to be happy and if we are in a shop and I
see something I have to have, he buys it for me. Im sure
my childhood also warped my view of money. When I was
growing up I never had to worry about money. My parents
had their own business and there was always a bag filled with
cash stashed somewhere in the house.
At the height of her debt, Kim was working in fashion
and caught the fashion bug. That bug still burrows away
deep inside her: I have seen the most amazing places in
Europe but instead of appreciating them, the only thing
I think about is what I can buy.
As with other addictions, family and friends are
inevitably drawn in, especially with compulsive shoppers
tendency for secrecy. I used to feel so guilty when I snuck
things into the house, says Lisa, 28, a corporate account
executive who lives with her husband and her parents. Lisa
would hide her purchases usually clothes and open them
much later in private. Sometimes she would go two months
before she wore her new clothes for fear of what her family
would say. She would then tell them that someone gave her
the clothes as a gift. At its worst point, Lisas debt across four

Id love to learn how to

save money and enjoy
life without needing to
go shopping all the time
credit cards amounted to about R100000 55 percent of
her annual salary at the time.
One woman who dealt with her addiction in a very
public way was Karyn Bosnak, the worlds most renowned
shopping addict. Thanks to extensive media coverage of her
website, savekaryn.com, and bestselling book, Save Karyn, she
became the worlds most infamous shopping addict. In 2001
Bosnak accepted a R400000 a year TV production job in
New York, but after moving there from Chicago, she ran up
a massive R100000 credit card bill within months.
New York is a tough city. All the women look fabulous,
says Bosnak. I felt young, immature, nervous and out of my
league. She found herself compensating for her insecurities
with retail therapy. I would buy things to feel more
confident, she says. Then there was the revenge factor. I was
working very hard so when I bought something I couldnt
afford, I rationalised it by saying I work hard and I deserve
it. I was unhappy in my new job but I felt trapped. w

help yourself

I wanted to leave but couldnt find a job that would cover my

is on sale or because they are buying for other people. One
rent, spending and debts. I realised I was out of control.
Christmas I spent every cent of my salary, says Lisa. I was buying
After losing her job and consolidating her debt, Bosnak
presents for other people so I told myself it was okay.
created her website where she explained her situation and asked
The mood repair addict is the easiest to identify. What starts
people to help pay her debt. Unsurprisingly, she received a
as a short-term coping mechanism becomes a longer-term
barrage of incredulous and abusive e-mails but, she says, I kept
addiction. These addicts feel a need to buy new things when they
are unhappy, troubled or anxious. My shopping has more to do
receiving money. In 20 weeks, she received R50000.
The revenge factor Bosnak cites also features prominently
with relieving stress and anxiety and less to do with depression,
in Women as Addictive Consumers, a study published by Dr
Lisa says. But its the anxiety that makes me feel depressed.
Sue Eccles from the University of Lancaster in 2002. Evidence
Dr Eccles notes that the mood repair, revenge and serial
suggests that women shop when they are fed up and buy things
addicts all have low self-esteem. In Lisas case, her anxiety, low
in spite of or because of their relationships, or to add meaning
self-esteem and addiction are all linked. I worry about fitting in
to their lives, Dr Eccles says. Her
and that people will judge me by my
study classified female shopping
appearance, she says. It boosts my selfaddicts into four groups: the
esteem when people compliment me
revenge addict, the serial addict,
on my new clothes.
the existential addict and the
Others may spend more than they
mood repair addict.
can afford on services. These often
Revenge addicts may have
include hairdressers, beauty treatments,
a flawed personal relationship
cosmetic surgery and personal trainers.
and want to get back at a
Olinda admits to a weakness for
partner or family member, even
getting her face made up by cosmetics
though their behaviour is secret.
salespeople in department stores, and
They may also feel patronised or
then buys make-up she cant afford.
unimportant and shopping may
Sometimes I want to take it all back,
be seen as an exciting or slightly
but keep it because I might use it
dangerous pastime. Its one of the
in the future. John Falcon doesnt
few situations in their lives where
believe this excuse. A common trait in
they feel in control. John Falcon
shopping addicts is buying things they
also notes that many addicts
never use, he says.
come from families where money
While shopping may temporarily
issues were prevalent. Olinda
lift your mood, it doesnt do your
Never carry credit cards only shop with cash. Avoid
identifies in part with the revenge
finances any good. Some people
shopping at supermarkets that are located in big malls.
theory. I study full-time and in
become obsessive about work if
Work out a weekly budget and shop only from a list
the holidays I work in the family
it means theyll earn more money
that you have made at home. Acknowledge any secret
spending to yourself first and then involve partners and
business. It affects my social life
for shopping. Others resort to less
family members. Once everything is on the table it doesnt
and feel I deserve something for
honourable methods. At her worst,
become a shame and blame thing, says John Falcon.
everything I miss out on.
Karyn Bosnak devised what she called
Avoid lay-bys as this just fools you into thinking that
Serial addicts have gone
the buy and return credit payment
youre not being impulsive. Work out your total debt,
from one addiction to another,
management plan. She discovered that
write it on a large piece of paper and stick it on the wall,
or share a shopping addiction
if she bought something just before
Karyn Bosnak says. Instead of telling yourself that you
with another addiction, such as
her minimum monthly credit card
deserve to go out to dinner, look at the figure and use
the money you would have spent on dinner towards an
alcoholism. Falcon draws a similar
payment was due and returned the
extra payment. You cant avoid shopping malls, but if
parallel with other control issues.
item immediately, the credit from the
youre anxious or depressed, dont go there. Get help.
We see many women who have
return would appear before the debit
Join a support group or consult a psychologist who has
an eating disorder and who use
from the purchase, thereby meeting
experience treating addictions.
shopping as a way of dealing with
the necessary payment. I was happy to
their anxiety, he says. A shopping
find a way of avoiding paying off the
addict justifies going to a sale and buying something in the same
whole balance, but although it wasnt technically illegal, I felt like
way as an anorexic or bulimic justifies their eating patterns. Sales
I was stealing every time I did it.
become a green light for purchasing things without guilt.
Fortunately, Bosnak is now reformed and is sharing her
Existential addicts consider themselves expert shoppers
experiences with others who have been bitten by the shopping
and may even buy on behalf of others. They are discerning and
bug. But like any other former addict, she still has demons
spend a long time searching for the perfect outfit. Women in
to battle. She no longer has a credit card but her publisher,
this category often describe their shopping as missions, which
HarperCollins, sent her on a promotional tour for her book
they find exhausting but say it gives their lives meaning. I was
and gave her an Amex card.
working with a woman who shopped so much that her children
It made me wonder whether they had even read my book!
didnt have food, says Falcon. She would feel depressed about it
she says. Then my editor explained that it could only be used for
but would rationalise that her children had nice clothes to wear.
transport and accommodation. A voice in my head said there had
Existential shoppers may also feel justified because something
to be a way of using it at hotel gift shops. But I didnt try.

FL AB FIGHTE RS

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photographs xxxxxxxxxxxx

Bye-buy problems

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