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King Hobu: Aah! Why dont you let him speak Shikshamantri? Is this the talim you
preach to your students?
Minister of Education (Scratches his head, looks sheepish and cowers down in a corner
after being scolded by the King).
Minister of Trade (gaining courage but searching for an answer): No, no Sir! The fruit
market suffers from a slight loss! With the lack of rain the past season, the mangoes did
not do well! And now the apples .
King Hobu: What about the apples?
Minister of Trade (spotting the parrot in the orchard): Birds!
King Hobu (completely bewildered): Birds?
Minister of Trade (realizing that he has seen a parrot): Parrots!
King Hobu (in a tone seeking explanation): Parrots? What do you mean?
Minister of Trade (with more confidence as his trick has worked): The parrots are the
cause sir! They eat the apples!
King (nodding his head, now convinced): This is a serious matter!
Minister of Education (unable to contain himself inadvertently looks at the King and in
anger shouts): Foolish!
King (turning back at him unable to believe his ears): Foolish?
Minister of Education (to save himself from disaster): The parrots are foolish!
King (in an understanding tone): You have a point there! Birds are of no use at all! They
eat the fruits off the trees and the royal trade suffers a deficit!
Minister of Education: Right! Right sir.
Minister of Trade: Right! Right!
Minister of Education: But then (pauses) what is the way out?
Minister of Trade: Yes, the way out!
King: I declare an immediate meeting of the Cabinet Council now!
King: What is right you idiots? The royal fruit trade suffers and you have no solution?
Clown: This is pollution!
Their minds have no solution.
What is your resolution!
(Ministers propose certain suggestions to the King but all fail till)
Minister of Culture: I have an idea your honour! If I may be allowed
King: (Cuts him short) Drop the frills - Speak my Minister of Culture...
Minister of Culture: Your majesty if the superior army intelligence is used to find out
which parrots are so uncultured then steps can be taken to solve the problem.
Prime Minister: Thats brilliant! Let me deploy the sipahis to find the birds at once!
King: Im happy with your initiative Gobu! For your sense of urgency- (gives a jeweled
necklace)
Prime Minister: Thank you, your highness! But there was hardly any need
King: But remember! If you fail, the consequences would be direChorus song - The king will fire
The king will hire
The king is the sire
How can you tire?
Use a wire
The need is dire (The ministers exit dancing with the clown in the lead).
The Sutradhar comes inThe soldiers ran in all directions- (Background shows movement) But hardly they could
catch a parrot eating apples - Being birds of the plains, the parrots ate all kinds of grain
but apples? And finally, they came upon the culprit. It must be the parrot that lived in the
royal garden! There the Senapati goes(After some effort the parrot is caught in a net and brought before the Prime Minister
who takes it to the King!Action in mime here with the tune of military drum beats in the
background. The sound of heavy footsteps with the beat of the tabla is heard as the drum
beat fades away making the silence ominous).
Scene III - Court Scene.
(The bird is brought before the King. It is huddled in a lump and quick and jerky
movements reflect its fear. The court symmetry remains the same with ministers taking
their respective positions.)
Announcement: Mahavidhyan, Mahagyani, Mahayogyan Nayadhish, Purushotam
Naresh Hobuchandra vichar kaksh mein padhar rahe hai
Ministers: All rise and bow.
King: Mahamantri Gobu- report on your progress!
Prime Minister: Your Highness! Under your capable guidance, we have been successful
in our mission. The culprit has been caught! (smiles enigmatically) (ministers nod their
heads in general agreement)
King: Good (mockingly)! And who is it may I ask my dear Gobu!
Prime Minister: The royal sipahis worked tirelessly for ten days and ten nights,
scanning every corner of your land and finally found the errant bird, who knew no
etiquette or manners. It is an utterly foolish bird, bigger in size than its normal kin your
majesty! It is the same one that disturbed you in the early hours of dawn by the noise it
made!
Clown: Bird noises in the morning? It is an irritant to peace! What do you say your
highness?
King: (ignoring the clown) Which bird is it that dared to go against the royal dictates and
create a deficit balance in the fruit trade? Bring it in! (A gong strikes)
Prime Minister: Guards, get the bird that jumped on trees and pecked on fruits of the
royal garden in!
Ministers: (sing in chorus) Bring the bird!
Bring the bird!
That ate the fruits and danced on trees
Bring the bird!
Bring the bird!
Who sang in the clouds and bathed in the breeze
The bird is dragged in.
King: (eyes gleaming) So, this is the naughty monster!
Clown: This is the naughty monster
That needs to be put in a cluster
Ministers: (All) Yes, Yes, Shikshamantri; you can do it! We know you can do it.(Minister of Education seems reluctant)
King: How can you refuse? Show your skills in practical education! Educate this bird.
Minister of Education: With your permission, Sire, I accept with delight the task of
educating this foolish bird but.
King: (Irritated) Again but?
Minister of Education: A small but Sire! In order to plan the curriculum of training
parrots we need to call the scholars of the land!
King: (Turning to the PM) Convene a meeting of the scholars.
(A lot of humming noise is heard as the stage freezes and the Sutradhar walks in)
Sutradhar: The scholars are in a meeting! The Shastragyan Maha Pandit Ullukmaharaj1
is also with them. The Education Minister has great faith in his capabilities. In his
tola, he has 10,000 copied scripts of the Natyashastras, 15,000 copies of the
Arthashastra, 25,000 copies of Aryabhattas work and more than 1 lakh copies of
the Charaksamhitas, 2 lakh copies of the Rajtarangini, 5 lakh copies of the
(The meeting goes on in mime behind)
I think the decision is now made! Yes, I see the Education Minister is coming out to make
the proclamation after getting the approval of the King! No, Oh No, I see Ullukmaharaj
going to Raja Hobuchandra(Light focuses on backstage)
King: Yes, Shikshamantri! What has been decided?
Ullukmaharaj: (Pushing him aside) Maharaj! I have a plea! How can we train the bird
who has no manners? The gurukul is not the right place! We need a place to train the bird
and then the scribes who will copy the texts and then decide..
King: Hold your tirade pundit! All of you want salaries doing nothing is it? Summon the
craftsmen Shikshamantri and make the cage! Double the payment of the scribes and the
curriculum would be framed! Get Working! (shouts)
Clown: Dont you hear - Get Working! You pumpkin-heads, you bimbos - get working!
(He dances in a short caper and the movement comes to an end)
1 Ulluk in Bangla refers both to the owl and the ape. It is a term of abuse.
Zafar Miyan: Pulls pankha, what else? This is the fate of the have-nots in the village.
Jiska koin nahi uska khuda hai. Mehnat mein iman hai, aur agar iman mein ho ishq, to
bhai baat hi kuch aur hai.
All (Chorus): Ha bhai! Ha! Kya baat hai Miyan Sahib! Wah! Wah! Mashallah kya baat
hai.
Bishu: Arre look! There comes the royal messenger! What has he to announce in these
early hours?
Royal Announcer: Suno, Suno, Suno! (beat of drums) Maharaj Hobu Chandra ka yeh
ahlan! Shahi Tote ka pinjra bananewalleh lohar aur sonar bandhugan, rajsabha mein
pohuche! Pinjra banane ke kam mein safal hone par dariyadil maharaja sabhi bando ko
khush karenge
(beat of drums pick momentum)
Villagers form a ring and start dancing:
Song: Work for the king!
Work for the king!
Means a gold ring!
Means a gold ring!
Work and food
Seems too good
We are in the mood
To go for the shoot.
(They leave the stage running in a line behind the drum beater including the boat man
who had been out to catch fish)
Scene V: Cage scene
(Activity of a cage being made on stage. People are seen dragging things from one place
to another, measuring things, hammering, painting, etc. with the beat of drums in the
background. The Education Minister with a companion is seen to be supervising the work
himself. The Prime Minister walks in lazily with the Minister of Trade, the Clown and the
Scientist)
Prime Minister (saunters in): How is the work progressing Shikshamantri? (takes a
pinch of snuff) Hope you are doing it well.
Clown (with a bizarre laugh): Do it well Shikshamantri! Or you will
Minister of Trade: Would you care for the report of the market now Sir?
Prime Minister (having no idea of what had transpired before): What market?
Clown: Look after your own markets sires OR
Prime Minister: Or what Vidushak? You will carry tales to the king will you?
Both the ministers: Will you?
Will you?
Clown (off handedly): Keep guessing. Why should I tell you?
(The scientist meanwhile takes a round of the stage and keeps goading people to work.
Education Minister goes back to the site where the cage was being built and joins hands
with the scientist observing the work of the craftsman while)
Prime Minister: Look fool! We know you are cool! So here we pool! To give you a
(gives him a necklace of gold)
Clown: (Immediately turns back) I hope this is real. I will ask the goldsmith? Why dont
you see how the work is going on? Supervise it. Thats what you can do any way. Thats
what you are paid for.
(to the goldsmith) Hey Sonar! Tell me if this is real?
Scientist (comes forward): You dont trust the Pradhanmantri? I will lodge a complaint
against this buffoon for the disrespect he has shown.
Minister of Education: Let it be scientist. He is after all a fool. Why do you take him
seriously?
Scientist: The fellow will get a beating one day. His jokes are stale.
(The cage is nearly made by now and the parrot cowed down by the noise is seen chained
at one corner with a soldier guarding it.)
Clown: (getting near the parrot) Look at the bird. What sharp claws it has! And the beak
it is red!
(The Parrot gets disturbed and shakes its head. The soldier restrains it with difficulty
from biting the Clown)
Clown (in irritation): Hold the bird you silly soldier. Shikshamantri, what are you
waiting for? Push this beast into the cage.
Minister of Education: (looks questioningly to the Prime Minister) Shall we then
(Prime Minister, Scientist and all flings the bird in the cage and there is a sound
indicating that the door of the cage is locked while the soldier stands guard)
Prime Minister: (Turning towards all) Lets go to the Kings music room. He is in a jalsa
now.
Clown: Yeah, thats the right time to catch him!
If you want to watch him!
Ministers together: In one of his benevolent moooods!
Scene VI
Narrator: The cage was made. Jewels of all kind decorate it. People from far come to
see it. They sing in praise for King Hobuchandras grandeur
King: This is for you leader of the gold smiths. And this, for your people blacksmith.
And this goes to you wood workers. Heres some mohurs 2 for you leather craftsmen. And
here you are my ministers one by one
(King keeps distributing gifts to all his ministers one by one till among the common folk
Bishu pagol walks in)
Bishu: O King! The cage is made. The stage is set! But what about the education of the
bird?
(As people happily disappear)
King (confusedly): Yes, what about the education of the bird? (He withdraws the bag of
gold coins for the education minister)
All the ministers: Yes, yes what about the education of the bird?
Minister of Education: Arrangements have been made your majesty.
Minister of Culture (comes forward): Maha Pundit Ullukmaharaj is nearly ready with
the curriculum. With your permission majesty if we could join him to complete the royal
mission
King: Royal mission?
Minister of Education: Yes royal mission sire. Educating the bird.
King: Oh yes, what about the birds education?
2 gold coin
Prime Minister: Allow me O King, to put before you the plan we have? Call Pundit
Ulluk Maharaj.
(Pundit Ulluk Maharaj comes in)
King (incredulously): Is this Pundit Ulluk Maharaj?
Minister of Culture: Yes. Yes Sire. He has been trained under the Great Ringpho Chang
Horam of the land of King Yeshe Od in the kingdom of the clouds. He is here on
deputation
King: When did this happen Shikshamantri?
Minister of Culture: Your majesty, year before the season of plague when the moon
became blue, and the crops turned grey, the royal scientist with your permission made
arrangements and an exchange of scholars took place when
King: (trying to remember, pretends that he has remembered and says) Yes, yes of
course. Come Maha Pundit Ulluk Maharaj. Tell me your plans.
(Ulluk Maharaj meanwhile keeps counting his rosary beads, mumbling things to himself
and looks up when his name is called.)
Ulluk: Krish, kim, bhim, phat. Hum, tung ta dha, etc. (keeps muttering gibberish)
King: What does he say?
Scientist (amusedly): Why the tantra-mantra that is to be taught to the bird?
Clown: (after capering for a while comes forward)
Better be clear
If your heads are dear
Your time is near
Your time is near (and exits)
Minister of Education: Dont worry O King. All arrangements have been done. Scribes
have been called to copy the shastras. The parrots education would be completed in six
months, six days, six minutes, sixty seconds from now according to the lunar calendar
followed by the great scholar in charge of the royal mission.
King: SO BE IT THEN!
(All rise to exit)
Scene VII: Educating the parrot.
Narrator: Look at the diligence with which the parrot is being educated. Scribes have
copied and copied and copied
Clown: and copied and copied and copied at length all that could be copied to teach
the bird
Narrator: HOW NOT TO BE A BIRD!
(Music: Dance of Ulluk Maharaj struggling to push education down the parrots throat
while the bird splutters and gasps for breath. The soldier stands guard at the door while
the scribes are still busy.)
Minister of Education: Come Mahapundit. Do take some rest. Tell me how it is all
going.
Ulluk: (Counts something. Looks here and there. Again works on his rosary beads. And
tells him something in his ears)
Minister of Education: Good. Good. Keep up your good work. The King will be
pleased.
(Ulluk Maharaj and all the scribes nod their heads in agreement.)
Scene VIII: Soliloquy of the Parrot
Parrot (in a nostalgic strain):
I lived in the mountains
I lived amid clouds
I flew hither and thither
From flower to flower
And now to cower
In this golden bower
How sad is this hour
How sad is this hour
(pauses for a while)
But I must try to break
Free from this wreck
(tries wringing the bars open manages to twist itself out breaks a wing and tries to
fly)
O why does the wind not catch fire
To play on the lyre
My wings tire
To stretch
(shrieks in pain realizing the injury when the soldier wakes up and violently pushes it
in the cage)
Ulluk Maharaj: (comes in angrily)
Punish the bird
(A wild dance)
Clip its wings
(Dance continues)
Break its claws
(Dance continues)
Lock it in the meditation room.
(They freeze while the narrator enters)
Narrator: Did you know what happened after? Ulluk Maharaj sat in meditation too. He
forgot about the time. Minutes ticked into hours and hours into days
(In mime the condition of the bird weakens while the Pundit keeps mumbling)
The pile of shastras rolled higher as they are pushed down the birds tired throat
There was hardly any water or food in the cage
Security of the guards increased when suddenly the King came on his rounds to see how
the education was going
(All the scribes and the Pundit break into a flurry of activity. The bird could hardly be
seen in the pile of books around. The king and ministers go away happy when)
Bishu & Zafar Miyan:(enter from the side bowing) Hail to thee O King! Hail to thee!
How is the education of the royal parrot going?
Minister of Education: Look at the cheek of this peasant? He questions the King?
Ministers (together)? How dare you question the King?
Prime Minister: Call the (he wants to say guards but is cut off mid-sentence)
Court Poet: Lets hear what he has to say. I see Zafar Miyan there. Yes, Zafar Miyan
what do you want to know?
Zafar Miyan: We were walking down this way Jahapanah. We have made the cage and
educating the bird is the royal mission of Nischindapur gaon. What is so wrong in our
wanting to know about the education of the parrot your majesty?
Bishu: Maharaj, Nishchindapur is eager to know whether they can help in educating the
bird too.
Clown (in an aside): These buggers also want to rob the king of his money.
(to the two villagers) The education is going very well. The talim of Ullukmaharaj is
impeccable. What would you understand any way you country bumpkins?
Zafar Miyan: I understand Rajvidushak. Who does not know the greatness of the Pundit
Ulluk Maharaj.
Bishu (mimicking Ulluk Maharaj): Him, krim, phat, dhum, dham, ghat, (shows the
wringing of neck)
Zafar Miyan: Ah Bishu (warning him). Did you see the bird O King?
King: (confusedly) The bird? Did we see the bird vidushak? Which bird was it any way?
Prime Minister: The parrot sire. The parrot that spoilt the royal fruit trade incurring a
loss to the exchequer.
Clown: How can the King remember? He has an entire kingdom to think of. Trade in
West Asia, missionaries to the Far East, expedition up the mountains to train the
soldiers
Zafar Miyan and Bishu (together): But the bird sire? Did you see the parrot behind the
rolls of the scribes, the fumes of burning incense sticks, the flowers,
Enter the soldier: I have news your majesty.
King: What is it now?
Soldier: Ullukmaharaj-ji sent me your highness to inform you that six months, six days,
six minutes, sixty seconds are over now and the education of the parrot is complete.
King and Ministers: The birds education is over?
Zafar Miyan & Bishu (looking confused): EDUCATION OVER!
King: Announce for royal celebrations.
Zafar Miyan & Bishu: But the bird sire? Can we see the parrot?
King: Yes, why not? Bring the bird here now.
(back space of the stage the bird is seen to breathe her last and die. Ullukmaharaj gets
up from his trance. Soldiers carry the bird centre stage.)
Scene IX:
King: This is the parrot then. Lets evaluate the product of the royal education system
Shikshamantri?
(The bird lies stiff without wings, bereft of all feathers. Ulluk Maharaj stands proud and
erect with the smile of a job complete on his lips.)
The King and the ministers take a round.
The King (poking the bird): Does it still jump?
Minister of Education (smiling): God forbid.
King: Does it still fly?
Minister of Culture: How can it sire?
Clown: Its stomach is loaded with scriptures. The scribes have worked very hard and so
has the great Pundit.
Ulluk: (nods and bows)
King: Does it sing any more?
Poet: Bird chatter is a cacophony to your royal ears. So
Minister of Education: Ulluk Maharaj took special care to cure him of this bad habit.
King: (uncomfortable) Does it scream if it does not get food?
Minister of Culture: He is at peace Maharaj. He can neither sing, nor fly, nor cry. He is
completely educated in the traditions of the land. He is in Samadhi.
(Zafar Miyan and Bishu creep closer. They watch while the royal members leave the
stage.)
Zafar Miyan (in a daze): The parrot is dead Bishu.
Bishu (in a surge of anger): Yes, they have educated it. Educated it?
Enter a mad man in the garb of a Sufi poet singing a song