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Fosters open communication, listens to others, speaks effectively and prepares written
communication so that messages are clearly understood. Acts to influence others in order to have
a specific impact or effect. Responds appropriately to concerns of others.
This Means...
This Doesnt Mean...
seeking first to understand, then be jumping in with a solution when someone
understood; deferring judgment on what
is starting to express their concerns
someone is saying and instead focusing
on finding out more
Developmental Activities
Pick a colleague in the organization who you believe would benefit from having
someone listen to their issues. For example, someone who is having difficulty with
work.
Create an opportunity to have them discuss the situation with you (if they wish).
Assess whether you were able to help your colleague; Were you listening, did you convey
your interest?
uncomfortable
R - Stay relaxed; pay particular attention to how you are holding your shoulders and
neck.
Allow for pauses - some important thinking can go on during silences in conversations.
Reflection Tip:
Assess whether you did everything you could to show that you were receptive to others.
Pay attention to the non-verbal cues of others during your next conversation.
Look for:
Arms or legs crossed (anger, withdrawal or resistance).
Facial expressions (different emotions depending on the exact expression).
Hands folded (thinking, weighing of alternatives).
Lack of eye contact (detachment, boredom, fear).
After conversations, assess whether you were paying attention to non-verbal cues, and try to
determine whether your interpretation of them was accurate.
Put yourself in informal work situations where you can test and practice your
Interactive Communication skills.
Initiate conversations with people who have such concerns by asking questions such as
What would you change if you could? or What would you do if you could?
Listen and see if you can summarize or paraphrase their concerns. Repeat their concerns to
see if you heard them correctly.
Dont try to solve their problems. Instead, try to say things that will make them feel that you
understand their concerns and can see things from their point of view.
Assess whether you have looked for and participated in informal work discussions where you
could practice listening, understanding and responding.
Provide the information that others need to do their work or feel comfortable with
your approach.
Ask the key stakeholders, or other team members how they would like to be kept up to date
or informed of new initiatives, progress against goals or setbacks on commitments.
Share all relevant information with team members to keep them fully aware of deadlines,
meeting schedules and changing requirements.
Let your group know that the team meetings are the time to ask questions and to clarify
initiatives or to resolve any outstanding issues on the decision making process.
Make a point to include team members who will be directly affected by a decision.
Increase the number of open-ended questions you ask to draw out the needs,
interest, concerns and objectives of others.
Monitor the number of open-ended questions or probes (e.g. What do you think about?,
Why did you feel that? How would you have approached...?, Tell me more about...) you use
with others in a one-day period.
Consciously increase the number of open-ended questions and probes you use in
conversations for the next month.
Pay attention to the difference in reactions you get from others when you use open- or
closed-ended (yes or no) questions.
Spend at least one hour per week reviewing service details and service training information
to ensure that the information remains fresh in your mind and that you are able to use it
effectively when necessary.
Take time to prepare your data, facts and detail pieces before speaking with a customer or
stakeholder. Prepare your presentation in a way in which it communicates the information
clearly and logically.
Think about the information you want to present or get across to your audience. Is there a
logical flow, in that they will need one piece of information before they are able to work with
the next?
Start with your more general points and then narrow the funnel to provide more specific
detail.
Once you have built the flowchart, review it to ensure that you have not missed any steps
which, although they may seem obvious to you, may be critical to your audiences
understanding.
Rehearse your presentation and think about the connections you may need your audience to
make in order to gain their agreement. Once you have identified which of the connections are
most critical, you can plan a couple of different ways of helping your audience make these
connections.
Reflection Tip:
Think of this in terms of writing an outline for the presentation/ conversation. What are the
main sections? How do they fit together? What are the transition points?
Adjust your communication style to best fit the individual based on their style,
background, or job level.
Identify a situation where you had to modify your communication approach to fit the
individual.
Outline the nature of the situation and the approach you used.
Why was it effective or not effective?
What worked and why?
What would you have changed?
Identify a current or future situation in which you will have to adjust your communication
style to fit the individual.
Determine your approach. Try to identify unspoken concerns, especially if you did have a
complete understanding of the individuals needs.
Keep notes in your journal of how the individual responds and of new things you learn about
them in the process.
After an interaction with a person who has disagreed with your position, try to put yourself in
his or her shoes. Imagine what that person was thinking or feeling at the time.
Think about how your interpersonal style contributed to both positive and negative feelings
the person might be experiencing. Jot down what you would do differently to make the
interaction more positive, and use that information to develop a plan for the next time you
interact with that person.
Listen and determine whether you can summarize their concerns. Repeat their concerns to
determine you heard them correctly. Ask for further details on particularly important or
innovative points.
Dont try to solve others problems by offering a solution or your judgement of their
opinions. Instead, try to say things that will make them feel that you understand their
concerns and can see things from their point of view.
During an upcoming meeting, trace the conversation patterns, the frequency of interaction
that you have with each individual, and the verbal challenges that occur.
Indicate conversation patterns by placing an arrow every time someone speaks, from
them, towards the person they are directing their comment to.
Indicate frequency of interaction by putting a (+) on each conversation arrow every
time someone speaks.
Indicate challenges by putting (ch) on each corresponding conversation arrow.
Challenges occur when one person disputes, objects, or demands more of an explanation
from the speaker.
Joe
Sue
Matt
Bill
You
Jim
Cathy
Make additional notes about times that you are shut down by objections, challenges, etc.
Reflection Tip:
This exercise gives you a sense of the dynamics of the meeting, especially indicating how
you are participating relative to the other individual.
Discuss the outcomes of the diagnostic with a trusted peer, or your supervisor/manager. Get
detailed feedback on their perception of the outcome especially with regard to how you
performed in terms of Interactive Communication.
When faced with resistance, make several attempts at persuasion using alternative strategies.
If your attempts at influence and persuasion are not working, ask for time to reconsider and
arrange another meeting. Take the time to think of some alternative strategies.
Make additional attempts to persuade using these new strategies and note what works best.
Reflection Tips:
Develop your skills in preparing and delivering motivational and engaging speeches
and presentations.
Constantly monitor the audiences reaction to adjust your tempo and maximize the effect of
points that seem to arouse interest.
Where possible, personalize the information you are presenting in order to help convey your
passion for the message.
Reflection Tip:
Analyze your audience before your presentation or meeting (an audience can be one
person or a group).
Consider what else is currently happening within the organization that might impact your
proposal/idea. Do you need to gather more information to better understand this context?
Identify two or three things from your presentation that will most benefit your audience.
Prior to the meeting, speak to other people who may know how to get your ideas accepted by
your audience. Do they have advice or information that impacts your intended approach?
Reflection Tip:
Check to ensure that others understand what is being communicated and are clear on any
expectations.
Follow-up regularly and ensure that any changes of been communicated in a timely fashion.
Reflection Tip:
Consider whether everyone who may be impacted by a given decision or plan are being
informed in a timely manner.
Consider your usual or typical negotiating style based on one of the categories below (be
brutally honest with yourself):
Win/Lose: where you typically see yourself winning and the other party losing in the
process;
Lose/Lose: where you typically see both yourself and the other party losing in the
process;
Lose/Win: where you typically see yourself losing or giving in during the process;
Win/Win: where you typically see both yourself and the other party being satisfied with
the outcome of the process.
Think about the other partys position. What will his or her key points be? How will you
respond?
Meet with someone whose negotiating skills you would classify as win/win.
Review the current situation and your typical approach to negotiating with this person.
Ask this person how you and the other party can move closer to a win/win agreement.
Practice the negotiation.
Meet with the other person(s) to negotiate.
Use the feedback you received during your conversation.
Find a goal which both you and the other person can agree and focus on.
Maintain the focus on your common objectives.
Monitor your own thoughts and feelings throughout the discussion. Note the reactions
you are having to what the other person says. Use this information to help you manage
the negotiation process.
Instil into others your passion for an organizational initiative and encourage others
to develop commitment.
Identify opportunities with your area and emphasize how the current work effort is related to
the organizational initiative.
Involve direct reports and other stakeholders from the beginning (i.e., solicit input and
insight, communicate the vision, involve them in the development of the plan).
When goal setting with your direct reports, ensure that they are referencing the initiative as
one of the goals to which their specific efforts will deliver.
Talk to other business units and ask what they are doing to support the initiative.
Reflection Tip:
Congratulate people on their efforts and achievements throughout the initiative and
acknowledge progress as each milestone is met.
Intervene in problems related to the lack of co-operation between your direct reports or coworkers.
Use questions to elicit the underlying cause of the problem. Dig deeper to understand the
history or context of the issue.
Encourage your direct reports or co-workers to give each other behavioural feedback about
concern areas.
Keep a record of the results you see regarding improvements in their relationship.
Make helpful suggestions for resolving the underlying issues and intervene as necessary.
Reflection Tip:
List all the individuals who currently exist in your work related network - people you interact
with on a regular basis.
Identify the kind of role each person occupies in your network. For example, information
sources, coach or mentor, expert advisor, supporter, and performance feedback advisor.
Ask yourself if there are any roles you would like to see expanded or added to your network.
Make a conscious effort to identify and get to know people who can fill those roles.
Review your formal (work-related) networks on a regular basis, and apply the techniques
noted above to consciously solidify and expand your network.
Ask their opinion about the kind of work you do and if they could help you achieve some of
your job-related objectives.
Try to return the favour by offering your assistance or identifying areas where you may help
the individual achieve some of his/her goals.
Reflection Tip:
Monitor the goals and objectives of the relationship over time. Each of you should be
benefiting in some manner in order for the relationship to be a success.
When creating a vision for the future make sure it has the following characteristics:
it conveys an imaginable picture of what the future will be like
it appeals to the long-term interests of people
it consists of realistic, attainable goals
it is clear enough to guide decision making
it is flexible enough to allow individual initiative as well as adjustments to changing
circumstances
It is easy to explain.
Reflection Tip:
Check in with your team periodically to see how they are doing with the changes required.
Ask them what they feel the next logical steps should be and encourage them to share their
thoughts.
Books
The Power of Persuasion: How Were Bought and Sold, by Robert V. Levine (John Wiley &
Sons, 2006).
This book offers an incisive new take on the mindsets of those who prod, praise, debase, and
manipulate others to do things they never thought theyd do and are sometimes later sorry
they did.
Presenting to Win: The Art of Telling Your Story, by Jerry Weissman, (New Edition:
Prentice Hall, 2006; Original: Financial Times Prentice Hall, 2003).
Its time to learn how to make your presentations unforgettable and irresistible. This book
shows readers how to connect with even the most high-level audiences and transform
presentations from dry recitals of facts into compelling stories with a laser-sharp focus on
what matters most: what's in it for the audience.
Emotional Intelligence, by Daniel Goleman (New Edition: Bantam Books, 2005; Original:
Bantam Books, 1997).
The Western cultures esteem analytical skills measured by IQ tests: but there is clearly more
to success and happiness, even in technological societies, than IQ alone. Goleman has
written one of the best books on the nature and importance of other kinds of intelligence
besides our perhaps overly beloved IQ.
How to Talk So People Listen: A Guide to 21st Century Communication, by Sonya B.
Hamlin (New Edition: Wellness & Lifestyle, 2005; Original: Harper & Row, 1987).
This book includes comprehensive and well-organized information that addresses the needs
of both speaker and listener. The author provides practical information to those who want to
improve their capacity to understand and to communicate on the job and beyond.
Basic Business Communication: Skills for Empowering the Internet Generation, by
Raymond V. Lesikar & Marie Flatley (McGraw-Hill Ryerson Ltd., 2004).
This excellent textbook provides both student and instructor with all the tools needed to
navigate through the complexity of the modern business communication environment.
Excellence in Business Communication, by Courtland Bovee & John Thill (Prentice Hall,
2004).
This book gives the foundation for excellent, effective, and practical business communication.
By offering On the Job simulations that feature actual companies, readers apply business
communication concepts to real situations and sharpen their problem-solving skills.
Face to Face Communications for Clarity and Impact, by Harvard Business School Press
Staff (Edited by Harvard Business School Press, 2004).
Culled from Harvard Business School Publishings respected newsletters Harvard
Management Update and Harvard Management Communication Letter, this text offers tips
on eye contact, asserting oneself in uncomfortable situations, speaking directly, and giving
constructive criticism, this is the essential guide to using the spoken word more effectively.
How To Talk to Anyone, Anytime, Anywhere: The Secrets of Good Communication, by
Larry King (New Edition; Gramercy Books, 2004; Original: Crown Publishing, 1994) also
available on audio CD.
Learn how to start a conversation, give speeches and presentations, improve listening skills,
put people at ease, and discover the key to effective business meetings.
Intercultural Communication in the Global Workplace, by Iris Varner & Linda Beamer
(McGraw-Hill, 2004).
The authors zero in on the specific needs of a firm, from broad cultural and business values
This book reveals the four fundamental interaction style patterns for you to "try on" in your
search for understanding yourself and others. Within these patterns are clues to the "how" of
our behaviours. Find out how you consistently seem to fall into certain roles in your
interactions with others and how you can shift your energies to take on other roles when
necessary.
Exercising Influence: A Guide for Making Things Happen at Work, at Home, and in Your
Community, by B. Kim Barnes (Barnes & Conti Associates, Inc., 2000).
This book contains practical ideas and tools for exercising influence in all aspects of life to
accomplish more with less effort. Readers will learn how to create work, family, and
community relationships that are more balanced and mutually rewarding, and to take charge
of their lives in a powerful, ethical, and productive way.
The Power of Indirect Influence, by Judith C. Tingley (AMACOM, 2000).
This insightful book looks at ways people can alter their communication skills to exercise
influence over other people. It teaches a six-step program for readers to determine whether
a person should use indirect or direct influence in any given situation. The author reveals
the dynamics of influence and power. It also teaches readers to recognize what motivates
others.
Artful Persuasion: How to Command Attention, Change Minds, and Influence People, by
Harry A. Mills (AMACOM, 1999).
The book provides fresh insights and practical guidelines that peel away the mystery behind
the elusive art of persuasion. This book reveals how the worlds most persuasive politicians,
advertisers, salespeople, and spin doctors work their magic.
Harvard Business Review on Effective Communication, by Ralph Nichols, Leonard Stevens,
Fernando Bartolome, Chris Argyris & Antony Jay (McGraw-Hill Ryerson College, 1999).
With topics that include how to run a successful meeting, change frontline employees'
behaviour, and build effective management teams, Harvard Business Review on Effective
Communication offers useful tips for all businesspeople.
Why Didnt You Say That in the First Place? How to be Understood at Work, by R.
Heyman (New Edition: Raincoast Books, 1997; Original: Jossey-Bass Publishers, 1994).
Misunderstanding through poor communication is rampant in the workplace, yet most
workers just shrug their shoulders and accept misunderstanding as a fact of life. In this book,
the author offers a path to clear communication by demonstrating how we can always reach
full mutual understanding with others by using the power of plain talk in a systematic way.
Power and Influence, by J. Kotter (The Free Press, 1985).
This book describes the need to develop relationships and effectively manage those
relationships. One key element is overcoming resistance and gaining co-operation without
formal authority. Kotter explains that lateral relationships take effort. Recommended for
middle managers and executives.