JaLon Williams

Professor Scaife
RHET 1311
23 November 2016

Entering a Conversation
As a college freshman I use social media all the time. My friends and I may be in a room
together and all of us will have our faces in the phone; however, this doesnt mean we are
completely unaware of our surroundings. Digital technology isnt detrimental to our identity and
friendships; texting is an efficient way to communicate, social media is a great way to store
memories you have with others, and romantic relationships can be healthily maintained with
digital technology in their lives. Katie M. wrote an article called Technology is a good thing
and in it she said,
Not only does technology provide us with a new and improved way to communicate, it
gives us new and exciting ways to research and get ideas out to the world faster (Technology is
a good thing, n.d). Texting gives an easy way for relay information to others; however, unlike
information given over the phone of in person. A person can always look back at a text if they
forget instead of racking their brain to remember something and possibly remember it wrong. He
or she is able to clearly get their point across because it is easy to say how they really feel. It is
easy to hide behind the keyboard instead of facing the conversation up front. This ties into Sherry
Turkle's belief that ...texting, email, posting, all of these things let us present the self as we want
to be. We get to edit, and that means we get to delete, and that means we get to retouch, the face,
the voice, the flesh, the body -- not too little, not too much, just right. I dont completely agree

as not everything can be sugar coated in text. Sometimes things can be even more messy as
things could come across as blunt and hurtful almost as if you said it out of your mouth in a nasty
tone. For example my best friend of 8 years almost completely dismantled our friendship
because she thought I was accusing her of stealing a shirt of mine. On each side of the text we
couldnt understand what the hell the other was mad for. The problem was, I wasnt mad, I just
asked her if she took my shirt home with her. I sat down and talked to my mom and she told me.
Text are just words, they don't hold emotions and she couldn't fully understand your
context through those few words you typed to her. You may have just been asking if she had your
shirt but on the other side of that phone, your words meant something completely different.
Eliminating the notion that text can be easier, that doesnt mean it is worse. I believe there is a
time and place for texting, but it is impossible to deny the pros of being able to send a speedy
message if need be. Sometimes text is also best for people who may not have the nerve to say
things in public. Being able to text allows this person to get their point across without the fear of
face to face conversation.
One thing I can completely agree with Turkle on is ...they don't really work for learning
about each other, for really coming to know and understand each other.(Turkle, 2016) If we
could have had this conversation in person or at least on the phone the context would have been
clear and the argument would have never occurred. After apologizing to each other my best
friend and I cut our text time down significantly. We decided phones calls were best if we were
away from each other because we wanted to hear each others voice.
In class my professor started a discussion on snapchat begging the question Do we feel
the need to post to snapchat because if we dont that automatically means we arent having fun?
this coincides with Turkles words I share therefore I am(Turkle, 2016). I use snapchat to store

memories. Of course I post stories so others can see what Im doing but ever since I was little
Ive always loved to take pictures and record events so that I can look back on them. As someone
with depression, its a nice to look at these and think of how happy I was in these moments. The
term ...We expect more from technology and less from each other(Turkle, 2016) doesnt really
apply to my friends and I because we expect everything from each other. We expect our friends
to confide, to listen, to comfort, to defend, and to exchange actual memories. We may love social
media, but many teens like us can see the major difference between digital love and attention
versus face to face love and attention.
To me, there is nothing better than phone calls and face to face conversations. Others
prefer speaking over social media because in our current society it is very hard to form
relationships. This is partly due to technology but there are many different barriers such as where
you live. When I was little I wasnt allowed to leave the house because we lived in a bad
neighborhood. The internet was my best friend, This wasnt because I chose the internet over
people, I just couldnt form relationships. when I moved to college I was able to meet great
people and social media doesnt even come second to them.
For romantic relationships I believe it is a similar case. Social media can be hindrance
sometimes but a good chunk of teens; however, are capable of maintaining a healthy relationship
with the use of social media. Reports say ...92% of teens with romantic relationship experience
have spent time text messaging with their partner at least occasionally. 87% have spent time
talking on the phone with their significant other. [Moreover,] 86% have spent time together in
person, outside of school hours. (Lenhart, Anderson, Smith, 2016) Though social media can
cause strain on some relationships, if used properly, it should never be a major problem or cause

miscommunication. Many of these couple didnt let texting or phone be there main source of
context, they prefer to have their partner standing in front of them.
Overall digital technology isnt the issue society faces. The Issue is how easy the people
in society will run to social media or texting to feel better about themselves. Digital technology
doesnt force us to sit at the computer all day or stick our faces so deep into our phones that we
dont realize anything else. We make the conscious decision to go the easier route sometimes, I
cant say this face to face so Ill just text it or My internet friends really understand me, I dont
need face to face friends . Take 14 year- old Katherine for instance, she uses social media
heavily. Katherine absorbs a mass of likes because of her tbh post. To her, the tbh post ...
kind of, almost, promotes you as a good person. If someone says, tbh youre nice and pretty,
that kind of, like, validates you in the comments. Then people can look at it and say Oh, shes
nice and pretty. (Contrera, 2016) From just one post Katherine felt both validated and like she
was a good person, why would she give that up to hold a raw face to face conversation? Instead
of criticizing digital technology we need to promote face to face encounters, show society that it
isnt so hard to get out, or make new friends. It may not be as easy as the internet but in the long
run theyll realize easy doesn't always mean better.

References

Turkle, Sherry. "Connected, But Alone?". Ted.com. N.p., 2016. Web. 28 Nov. 2016.
http://www.ted.com/talks/sherry_turkle_alone_together/transcript?language=en

Turkle, Sherry. "Stop Googling. LetS Talk.". Nytimes.com. N.p., 2016. Web. 28 Nov. 2016.
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/09/27/opinion/sunday/stop-googling-lets-talk.html?_r=0

"This Is What It's Like To Grow Up In The Age Of Likes, Lols And Longing". Washington Post.
N.p., 2016. Web. 28 Nov. 2016.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/sf/style/2016/05/25/13-right-now-this-is-what-its-like-to-growup-in-the-age-of-likes-lols-and-longing/

Lenhart, Amanda, Monica Anderson, and Aaron Smith. "Teens, Technology And Romantic
Relationships". Pew Research Center: Internet, Science & Tech. N.p., 2016. Web. 28 Nov. 2016.
http://www.pewinternet.org/2015/10/01/teens-technology-and-romantic-relationships/

M., Katie. "Technology Is A Good Thing | Teen Hot Topic Essay On Technology, Advances,
Advantages, Facebook, Cell Phone, Myspace, Generation And Generation M". Teenink.com.
Web. 30 Nov. 2016.
http://www.teenink.com/hot_topics/all/article/179849/Technology-is-a-Good-Thing/