Kim Lemmenmeier, 6b

16. 5. 2012

Domestic abuse
She is lying on the floor. Her swollen up eyes rend it almost impossible for her to see any daylight or to
anticipate further steps of her husband. She feels blood running down her face, although she stands
no chance to make out the source of all the red liquid. Her body seems to hurt everywhere. Every time
she tries to get up, her hands meet the wet floor and slide away again. Before she gets a second
chance to escape, another punch knocks her down to the ground. The last thing she notices, before
losing consciousness, is her little baby weeping right next to her. Then everything is dark.
What sounds like the plot of a gripping novel, happens to be everyday life for some Afghan woman.
The bestseller A thousand splendid suns by Afghan-American author Khaled Hosseini seems to be
much more than some sort of fictional entertaining. The plot of this book is definitely inspired by true
stories, since different studies showed the enormous extend of domestic violence in Afghanistan.
In 2006, the first report about domestic abuse, which is based on reliable statements by women
throughout the whole country, has been published. There have already been other studies in advance,
but they were based on sources such as the local police, which is apparently said to be not objective
at all. What we have read in A thousand splendid suns is reality. When a woman seeks aid and her
case gets as far as the legal system, there often is absolutely no effort. The perpetrator of such an
infamous action leaves freely, without any punishment, not even a warning. However the woman is
compelled to return home, where most probably her husband is waiting, furious because of her
impudence to fight for herself.
Fortunately, the situation is improving, yet many aid agencies are doing the best thing that they can
do.
There is a very long way to go before Afghan women are fully protected from violence, says Navi
Pillay, UN High Commissioner for Human Rights.
To see that people are caring about their future confirms Afghan women to raise their voice, talk about
their experiences and hereby help organizations in turn. With reports about those terrible fates and
books such as the one from Khaled Hosseini, they achieve to attract more global attention and
consequently Afghanistan is forced to change the momentary conditions with increasing urgency.
Even though proceedings are visible the situation should not be looked upon as easygoing.
Just now numbers are still very shocking. 87.2 % of all Afghan Women have been at least once victim
of sexual, physical or psychological violence and/or live in a forced marriage. The numbers modify
broadly from town to town. In some regions all women (100%) reported, to suffer from at least one sort
of violence.
As shocking as these facts are the reasons for these abuses, shown by the following example:
Farah was accused by her husband of over-salting the meal at supper. Her husband beat her, and
then tied her up in the basement of their home, where he beat her some more for several hours. He

Kim Lemmenmeier, 6b

16. 5. 2012

then forced their young son to violently penetrate his mothers vagina with a stick as a punishment for
shaming the husband in front of the dinner guests.
This example shows that it is still a very long way until Afghan women will receive the same rights and
social status as men do. It is obviously that a long tradition of suppression, humiliation and
degradation of female beings is preventing modern Afghanistan from changing their attitude overnight.
If a Swiss reads this story, it gives him a nasty shock. Something like this is not compatible with our
sense of justice and respect for other people. But for an original Afghan man, this way of treating a
woman is more or less usual standard. Hence there is no possibility to appeal to their human
conscience. After me, the only way to change the whole Afghan attitude is to start with the younger
generation and educate them by learning what it means to be a human being.
To really change womens significance, forced marriages must be prohibited, as well as marriages for
under 18-years-old girls. But those changes are not made that easily, self-evidently. Although
Afghanistan acquired a new law on domestic violence, outlawing child and forced marriage, assault
and rape three years ago, there is no proof about what is really happening behind the borders. At
least, little steps are made.
Anyway, there is another interesting psychological aspect to be considered. While 30.6 % of all
mistreatments are by husbands, 23,7 % of all cases are caused by the mother-in-law. Whereas this
information is a little surprising in the first moment, it is easily explainable in the second one. Studies
have proved, that an overwhelming majority of all women have been mistreated theirselves, when they
were younger. This definitely leaves psychological marks, especially because they have no opportunity
to talk about it and therefore digest it. Suddenly those women are in the higher position and finally get
some authority and it happens, that some of these victims become perpetrators. They do not see
another way, how to handle the situation differently than how they have experienced it.
It almost makes it impossible to me to accept these horrible facts. While dealing with this issue, I
realized once again, how happy we must be, to live in such a modern world with equal rights and
endless possibilities what to do with our future. It cracks me up to see how unfair, tragic and harsh
circumstances are for some people and it is even more vicious to see, that hardly no one can really
undertake something. Already during reading A thousand splendid suns I have been stretched to my
limits, but to look at so many reports and other sources, which really suggest reality, was even harder.
The only thing that maintains me is that there are many other people with similar feelings. Therefore I
hope, giant steps will be made in the next years and that oppression soon will be past.

Sources
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-16388825
http://news.xinhuanet.com/english/world/2012-02/15/c_131412628.htm
http://section15.ca/features/news/2008/07/04/afghan_women/
http://iwpr.net/report-news/little-recourse-afghan-domestic-abuse-victims
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/opinions/editorials/afghan-women-punished-for-fleeing-domestic-abusewhile-perpetrators-walk-free/article2387582/
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Kim Lemmenmeier, 6b

16. 5. 2012