M E M O RAN D U M

TO: Riley Mosby

Student Writer, Freshman Portfolio Writing

THROUGH: Shayla Atkins, M.A.

Lecturer, Department of English

FROM: Sydne Barard

Student Reviewer, Department of English

DATE: January 16, 2017

SUBJECT: First Essay Reviewers Comments

I write to address your essay Oedipus Essay that you submitted on January 14. There were
several areas that I noted while reading the essay that deserve varying levels of attention.

This was a great essay. Very well written and organized, the essay made valid points that were
easy to follow. If anything, the way the essay was written may be confusing to readers who have
not read the play. Storylines are not thoroughly explained; however each point being made is
clear. The thesis outlines the purpose and message of the paper so as the reader it is not hard to
understand why the essay was written.

My only critique would be to make sure that readers who may not have read Oedipus will be able
to follow what youre saying in the essay. Maybe add a paragraph to summarize the plot and how
exactly the characters actions of trying to avoid their fate led to their demise.

Overall, your essay was already great. I look forward to reading your reworked idea.