Child Guidance Assignment One

Mackenzie Dufour
0639893

Professor: Carol Smith

Date of Submission: November 14th 2016
 Many parents today fall under a parenting style category. Whether it be authoritative,

authoritarian, or permissive parenting, all parents fall either under one category or more than one

category. In our society today, many children are left to raise themselves because of working

parents or simply parents that do not care. Some parents believe in different types of discipline.

By conducting an interview about parenting styles, it gave an opportunity to gather information

about what parenting style may or may not be most effective. Enclosed are the interview

questions:

Question 1: What type of parenting style do you agree with?

Her answer: Emily said she was a mix between brick wall and backbone parenting. Her ultimate

goal is to eliminate any type of power struggle, giving the opportunity for her son, Christopher,

to express his feelings. She only implements punishment when needed or when is necessary. She

believes that talking about feelings and situations is important. She thinks that understanding

situations from Christophers point of view is important, because his feelings are important and

valued. Everything is based on negotiation. She does not get mad over things such as if

something broke, or things that cannot be undone. There is no control or manipulation.

Question 2: What is the most challenging time of day for you and your child/children regarding

behavior issues and what are the most difficult behaviour issues? Describe using examples.

Her answer: The most challenging time of day for her with Christopher is leaving for school. It

requires a lot of repetition to get him motivated. He is a busy boy and he currently has difficulty

putting on his shoes. She believes it is more of a personal issue instead of a behavioural issue.

She tries to encourage him to stay motivated and on track. If he feels like he cant achieve, he

will easily give up on something. To assist him with this difficulty, she turns the challenges for
him into a song to help and encourage him to achieve his task. She said he rarely ever does talk

back, and when he does she reminds him of respect, and the importance of it.

Question 3: Describe a discipline measure that you like to use with your child/children. Why do

you like it? How is it effective?

Her answer: She does use time out. But, she believes in cooling down, and when he is calm she

will come back and talk to Christopher about the situation. It takes time to cool down and talk

things through by both acknowledging each others feelings. She has only ever used corporal

punishment twice. She does not believe spanking is an effective way to deal with a situation. She

does not use it as a form of discipline. She is also a strong believer in the emergent curriculum

aspect.

Child development is an important area in a childs life. It is the point where they begin to

explore their world, problem solve, be able to take risks, and most of all, build relationships with

peers and teachers. It is a time where they are able to express themselves in all aspects and where

they begin to experience challenging situations. They begin to explore emotions and start to

develop their own identities as well. However, child development can have an impact on

problem solving. By conducting research, the findings have provided different points of view on

how problem solving affects child development.

Question 1: According to Hartz and Williford (2014), they believed that a childs

development with their teachers and also with their mothers plays a role in behaviour with

children. Their findings stated that the environment children developed in, and their temperament

were crucial in determining behavioural problems in children. They also found that children that

had difficult temperaments were more likely to have negative emotions and reactions, and those

with easy temperaments were more likely to have more positive emotions and reactions (Hartz
and Williford, 2014). This could affect problem solving in preschoolers and kindergarteners

because different children will handle situations and conflicts in different ways. From the

information gathered, my thoughts on this issue is that a childs development comes from both

the parents and teacher influence. If the teacher influence is bad or negative, and then the child

goes home and the relationship with the parent (s) is bad or negative, then the child will feel as if

they are not loved, capable of solving their own problem, and that they have no control over

themselves or their emotions. They feel unimportant, and I do not believe that is a way for a

child to feel.

Many children do not know the first thing about problem solving because they are so

egocentric, and many of them have problems expressing themselves with language as well.

Many children just have a flood of emotions and are unable to understand words such as

problem, solve, or solution. They may feel overwhelmed by those words (Evans, 2002).

From experience, it can be said that many children at the toddler and preschool level, are just

beginning how to learn to problem solve. They are still in the pre-operational stage of

development, which means they need to see what the root cause of the problem is, in order to

come up with a possible solution (Evans, 2002). My thoughts on the issue of problem solving

come from the research that was done. Children need to be able to have healthy development,

with their home caregivers, and school caregivers. Broken relationships with either of those

aspects can make the issue of problem solving a lot more complicated. I believe that children

who have broken relationships with their families can have a harder time problem solving, and

problems with compliance. Many children have families that are divorced, and that is a hard

adjustment to deal with. Their behaviour and problem solving skills become more difficult.

Problem solving is important in child development, but the right amount of caregiving in the
home and outside of the home are required in order for those problem solving skills to become

stronger.

Question 2: (Research) For years, the debate about corporal punishment has been a

growing issue. Some parents believe in it and some dont. It has been an issue about whether it is

right or wrong. According to Taillieu and Brownridge (2013), some parents believe that corporal

punishment is an effective way to discipline a child. Parents who use corporal punishment are

more likely to be less warm and responsive vs. parents that do not use corporal punishment

(Taillieu and Brownridge, 2013). Taillieu and Brownridge (2013), stated that parenting style and

disciplinary techniques contribute to the developmental outcomes of children, both positive and

negative. Positive development was associated with authoritative parenting, and the idea of

corporal punishment was used in a way that was child-centered. This is the whole issue, that

corporal punishment is okay to use in some cases as long as it is used as a child centered

approach instead of adult centered approach.

A) I think that some parents, teachers, and Early Childhood Educators punish children

because some of them do not know what else to do, or some grew up with their

parents punishing them. Some believe that if they punish, the child will most likely

never do what they did again, but really it ends up being the opposite. The more you

punish them, the more they are likely to act out. From a handout that was handed out

to us in class about discipline vs. punishment by Elaine M. Gibson, Gibson states that

the belief behind punishment is that pain must be felt for learning to take place. It also

states that punishment teaches children to: be afraid of authority, resent authority, how

to lie, and how to do things without getting caught. I agree with the statement that

punishment is meant to inflict pain (Gibson, 2006). Punishing a child is not going to
 get them to solve the problem faster, if anything it will make them resent you, want

revenge, rebel, and eventually retreat (The 4 Rs). This leads to low-self- esteem

(Gibson, 2006). I think that some teachers and Early Childhood Educators use it as

an easy way out because they do not want to deal with the situation anymore.

Punishment is control and manipulation, shaming a child, embarrassing them. I also

think that teachers and parents do it because they think it will be a way for the child to

really see what they did wrong, which again, is not the case. For example, if you

put a child on time out and tell them to think about what they did they are not going

to do that. The only thing that they are going to be thinking about is the fact that they

are sitting down and not having the opportunity to play, and then the problem is still

not solved. They are going through a flood of emotions, and while all their peers get

to play, they are being centered out. I believe that this is cruel and wrong. You dont

teach a child a lesson by putting them in a corner and expecting them to think about

what they did wrong, when really, most of the time, they dont know what they have

done, because you havent told them. There are more effective ways to deal with

problems and conflicts that arise among children. Punishment is not one of them.
B) The following information is from notes that were taken in class.
The differences between the adult problem solving for the child and the child

problem solving themselves are:

a. Adult-Centered: 3 approaches: 1. Authoritarian Approach (shark, bull,

lion). This approach basically means that adults solve childrens problems by

directing the child to behave differently. This approach involves using

physical and verbal punishment, and blaming the child. 2. Avoidance

Approach (ostrich, turtle, mice). This approach means that adults avoid

conflict because conflicts are upsetting. Adults in this approach walk away or
 tell children how to fix their problem. 3. Permissive Approach: this approach

means that there are few rules or standards of behaviour. It is known as the

jellyfish approach. If there are rules, they are often very inconsistent. Adults

may use bribery such as toys, gifts, and food as a means to get a child to

behave.
b. Child Centered: problem solving teaches children to take responsibility for

their actions and show respect to other people. With child centered

approaches, the idea is to use strategies that enable and allow the child to feel

that they are capable of solving their own problem. 3 important things to

remember with child centered problem solving are: active listening,

acknowledging feelings and ideas, and encouraging decision making.

There really are not any pros to the adult solving the problem for the child. I think it

degrades the child, and basically gives them the idea that the teachers ideas matter most. One

pro is that if the problem is not solved using the child-centered approach, and the child is at risk

of harming his or herself or others, then the teacher will step in. But I think the adult-centered

approaches are more about rules and authority, versus equal control and respect. There are more

cons to adult centered than pros. Cons are that authoritarian adults want order, control, and

obedience. Children are controlled and manipulated and made to mind. There is power and

control. Very little warmth is displayed with adult centered approaches. Permissive adults have

no backbone, they either smother or abandon children, and children are either obnoxious and

spoiled, or scared and vindictive. Children end up being afraid and do not know how to express

themselves. When you implement these adult problem solving approaches, the child does not

have the opportunity to know that their feelings and emotions are valued. You are basically

telling them that its your way or the highway, and they are not allowed to have a say in a
solution to the problem. In contrast, the approach we as ECEs need to strive to follow is the

authoritative approach (Backbone approach). When you are this type of educator, you do not

demand respect, you demonstrate and teach it. Children learn that they can say no, that they

can listen and be listened to, that they can be respectful and be respected. Children are taught

empathy and love for themselves and others (compassion). You are consistent, firm, and fair.

There is a calm and peaceful structure, and most of all, children are empowered. This is what a

child-centered problem solving approach is about. You are giving enough control so that the

child has the opportunity to work together with you to come up with a solution to the problem.

You are listening to each childs point of view, rather than dismissing or disregarding their

feelings.

C) The approach that I will use as an educator will be the child-centered approach to

problem solving. I am a firm believer in the fact that children need to be given time,

and given a chance to have the opportunity to solve their own problems, without

being told how and what to feel or what to think. I believe that there is a such thing as

learning from your mistakes, and that should be applied to young children as well. As

an educator, and when I become a parent, I want to make sure that my children

(inside and outside of the home) have equal opportunity to be respected and valued as

a human being. I will use the active listening strategies and the conflict resolution and

adult child interaction strategies frequently when working with and helping children

to problem solve.

As an Early Childhood Educator, it is our job to shape children and their future. If we

implement positive strategies and ways of dealing with problems, and allow them to be valued as

human beings, we will make the process of entering into a school setting easier for them. This
will avoid problems in adolescence and adulthood. One thing to always remember is that

children have a voice, and they have a right to know that they are respected, just as they respect

us.

References

Denham, S., Bassett, H., Zinsser, K., & Wyatt, T. (2014). How Preschoolers' Social-Emotional
Learning Predicts Their Early School Success: Developing Theory-Promoting, Competency-
Based Assessments. Infant And Child Development, 23(4), 426-454.
http://dx.doi.org/10.1002/icd.1840
Evans, B. (2002). You can't come to my birthday party! (1st ed.). Ypsilanti, Mich.: High/Scope
Press.
Gibson, E. (2006). Discipline is Better Than Punishment: So What's the
difference?. elainegibson.net. Retrieved 12 November 2016, from
http://www.elainegibson.net/parenting/punishment.html
Hartz, K. & Williford, A. (2014). Child Negative Emotionality and Caregiver Sensitivity Across
Context: Links with Children's Kindergarten Behaviour Problems. Infant And Child
Development, 24(2), 107-129. http://dx.doi.org/10.1002/icd.1887
Taillieu, T. & Brownridge, D. (2013). Aggressive Parental Discipline Experienced in Childhood
and Internalizing Problems in Early Adulthood. Journal Of Family Violence, 28(5), 445-458.
http://dx.doi.org/10.1007/s10896-013-9513-1