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The Holy Grail of MREs: military Combat Feeding Directorate is workin... https://www.reddit.com/r/Military/comments/54uzrp/the_holy_grail_of_...

this post was submitted on 28 Sep 2016

The Holy Grail of MREs: military Combat Feeding 351 points (97% upvoted)
351 Directorate is working hard on shelf-stable pizza https://redd.it/54uzrp
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submitted 7 months ago by vitruv
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[] mscomies Army Veteran 106 points 7 months ago

I hope this isn't from the same team that made their shelf stable
omelettes.
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[] Snerha 25 points 7 months ago


Veggie omelet would maybe get you some hot sauce (and not the
green kind) in the daily market. Absolutely worthless.
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[] dqsg22 Air Force Veteran 45 points 7 months ago

That MRE was proof the military hates vegetarians and wants
them to starve.
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[] usNEUX KISS Army 8 points 7 months ago

Nah. I can live solely on spicy penne paste in the field. They Submit a new text post
have the best snacks too.
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[] AdrianIsBeast Army Veteran 3 points 7 months ago
95,067 Overall amount of safety briefs
Thankfully someone else has noticed. Always pick the ~81 Sitting in safety briefings
vegetarian meals cause they have the best snacks, and
always have candy.
Posting Rules
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[] WIlf_Brim Retired USN 16 points 7 months ago Rule 1: Be Civil and don't be whiny.
Great googly moogly, those things were just awful. Totally < > discussions in r/Military X

unredeeming. That and the dehydrated pork patties. Gone and 327 36 comments

unmourned. Marines of Reddit, here is your chance


to help Crayola name their new flavor!
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1 of 7 5/7/17, 1:39 PM
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[] Orcasmic United States Air Force 15 points 7 months ago


See full detail of rules Here
You mean the McRib?
permalink embed parent Dealing with PTSD?
[] LeeJP Reservist 19 points 7 months ago

The McRib is pretty good though. Maybe it's stockholm


Related Subreddits
syndrome, but by some twist of fate I ended up drawing
BBQ Pork Patty my whole time at CSTX.
Thanks /u/snimrass for our new banner!
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a community for 9 years
[] TheWangernumbCode dirty civilian 5 points 7 months ago

I actually sort of liked the pork. No sticky hands, you could put
them in a pocket. Sure, they tasted like soap, but they were
convenient on the fly. Bonus: extra ballistic protection.
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[] Nf1nk Civil Service 6 points 7 months ago

Didn't those come with a small brick compressed sawdust as bonus


fuck you.
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[] phildo4prez United States Army 2 points 7 months ago


The glorious veggie omelette! When it first came out it was
chemically identical to a CPR test dummy.
MESSAGE THE MODERATORS
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[] redworm SECRET//NOPORN 69 points 7 months ago

Reminds me of hank hill's comments on Christian rock. They're not


making MREs better, they're making pizza worse. MQ-9 Reaper Drone
DocBraz 83rd MEU Airsofter
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misinformed66 Because Fuck You, That's Why
[] WhyAtlas 10 points 7 months ago rbevans Army Veteran & CSS Linguist
military_mods
Yeah... but even bad pizza is still good (don't let me down mre
JerziDevil
developers) swissarmypants )*)=3 0-:
permalink embed parent lowspeedlowdrag Marine

[] TheDomesticOG Army Veteran 10 points 7 months ago

As a Brooklyn native I can assure you that there is such thing as


bad pizza.
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[] I_LikeToReddit Canadian Army 13 points 7 months ago

there is such thing as bad pizza.

Challenge accepted
-Army
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[] WhyAtlas 3 points 7 months ago


That first bite with a massive hangover though
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[] Johnnytucf 3 points 7 months ago


everyone talks about "New York Pizza" like it's just one thing.
I'm from the South and the best pizza (Roadhouse Pizza in
rhead) and the worst
discussions in r/Military X pizza (Eden Pizza and Deli in the
36 comments x) I've ever had in my life were both in NY.
Marines of Reddit, here is your chance
to help Crayola name their new flavor!
Canadian Army 2 points 7 months ago

2 of 7 5/7/17, 1:39 PM
The Holy Grail of MREs: military Combat Feeding Directorate is workin... https://www.reddit.com/r/Military/comments/54uzrp/the_holy_grail_of_...

Your optimism is adorable.


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[] jinxed_07 United States Air Force 1 point 7 months ago

I'm not a picky eater (I tend to be hungry a lot and I have a


weak sense of taste and smell) but even I can tell you there is
such thing a bad pizza.
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[] TheDannestDan Army Veteran 53 points 7 months ago

If they taste at least half as good as Lunchables, I'm game.


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[] hobblingcontractor Army Veteran 37 points 7 months ago

They'll taste exactly like lunchables that have been made with
cardboard and rubber.
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[] hisgrossness United States Army 46 points 7 months ago

So just normal lunchables


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[] onionkimm 23 points 7 months ago


I just want my Capri Sun and fun-size Snickers.
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[] Prosthetic_Foreskin 24 points 7 months ago


We're adults now. I want my full sized snickers.
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[] 1LeggedJoe Marine Veteran 9 points 7 months ago

But not for the Marines.


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[] Prosthetic_Foreskin 15 points 7 months ago


You faggots get skittles so you can taste the
rainbow.
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[] phildo4prez United States Army 3 points 7


months ago
Fuck that they get charms.
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[] hisgrossness United States Army 2 points 7 months ago

As do we all
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[] gnadump 1 point 7 months ago


Top Tip: They make excellent normal-size Snickers for
dwarves.
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[] hobblingcontractor Army Veteran 1 point 7 months ago

But hot.
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[] hisgrossness United States Army 1 point 7 months ago


discussions in r/Military X

36 comments
ut only if you're outside
Marines of Reddit, here is your chance
parent
to help Crayola name their new flavor!

3 of 7 5/7/17, 1:39 PM
The Holy Grail of MREs: military Combat Feeding Directorate is workin... https://www.reddit.com/r/Military/comments/54uzrp/the_holy_grail_of_...

[deleted]

[] No-Coast-Punk 2 points 7 months ago


Sounds like someone has never been starving and deprived of
electrolytes.
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[] [deleted] 36 points 7 months ago


I heard news about the "upcomming" shelf stable pizza 10 years ago. I'll
believe it when I see it.
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[] LeeJP Reservist 22 points 7 months ago

It'll come when they finally release the new PT test they've been
talking about for thirty years.
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[] jacxy Royal Canadian Air Force 1 point 7 months ago

We've got it up here... they are planning something crazy with it.
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[] CassandraVindicated Navy Veteran 1 point 7 months ago

Came here to say this. I read an article about once a year on how
they are working on this and I can't remember how far back it's
been since the first one.
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[] stillhousebrewco 23 points 7 months ago


Just, don't.
Rememeber that awful pizza in middle school? A sheet of cold sadness
made of rubber and sawdust with no taste.
It will be worse than that.
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[] Deerscicle Air Force Veteran 13 points 7 months ago

But yet that breadtangle of pizza was still the highlight of the week
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[] muhak47s United States Army 6 points 7 months ago

Is....is that all I have to look forward too.....?


(Starts sobbing while cradling a handle of military special
vodka)
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[] Orcasmic United States Air Force 16 points 7 months ago

Chili Mac or bust!


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[] TheDomesticOG Army Veteran 3 points 7 months ago

With tiny bottles of Tabasco!


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[] 29penis 4 points 7 months ago


Things of the past
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discussions in r/Military X
7 months ago
36 comments
Marines of Reddit,ver the
here dehydrated
is your chance pork patties.
to help Crayola name their new flavor!

4 of 7 5/7/17, 1:39 PM
The Holy Grail of MREs: military Combat Feeding Directorate is workin... https://www.reddit.com/r/Military/comments/54uzrp/the_holy_grail_of_...

[] collinsl02 civilian 5 points 7 months ago

It won't be able to beat biscuits brown or cheese possessed.


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[] po_toter 4 points 7 months ago


It's going to be wheat snack bread, packet of red sauce (same red
sauce as other mres), packet of cheese spread, pack of sausage (from
jumbalaya), and grilled onions (from fajita).
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[] MrB1ond3 United States Army 4 points 7 months ago

im guilty of recreating MREs with real food...


chef boy ar dee spaghetti in a can, canned cheese spread, some
cheez-its, mix together, and booya spaghetti MRE.
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[] TheLittleBiddle 3 points 7 months ago


Haha! Sounds like what they do in jail!
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[] sashir Veteran 3 points 7 months ago

All about that chicken and salsa baby. Came with skittles.
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[] PoonSlayingTank United States Marine Corps 1 point 7 months ago

My chili-Mac came with skittles


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[] advtorrin Veteran 3 points 7 months ago

I'll trade you two jalapeo cheese packs!


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[] DB2V2 Navy Veteran 7 points 7 months ago

Good god, 2 jalapeno cheese packs, i'm rich bitch!


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[] 2goldfish 6 points 7 months ago


"Sex is kinda like pizza. When it's bad, it's still pretty good."
This may be proved wrong in the near future.
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[] I_LikeToReddit Canadian Army 3 points 7 months ago

The pizza will be bad and unnatural. Bestiality is probably where this
is going if you're using a sex metaphor.
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[] jedi280 2 points 7 months ago


I'd take a lunch able over the cheese omelet mre any day
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[] finnalloveragain 2 points 7 months ago


I am in the reserves and also work at the natick labs, i have a hard time
eating these things, no matter the meal ...
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[] KarmaCausesCancer Army Veteran 2 points 7 months ago

you just aren't hungry


discussions in r/Military X enough.
36 comments
Marines of Reddit, here is your chance
7 months ago
to help Crayola name their new flavor!
ard time, i still eat them.

5 of 7 5/7/17, 1:39 PM
The Holy Grail of MREs: military Combat Feeding Directorate is workin... https://www.reddit.com/r/Military/comments/54uzrp/the_holy_grail_of_...

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[] OctaMurk 2 points 7 months ago


Would like to re-assure everyone that in fact, the pizza MRE tastes like a
lunchables pizza that you made but then left in your fridge for three
days. Maybe I have shitty taste but I liked it.
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[] ZombieCharltonHeston Retired USMC 2 points 7 months ago

Seems easy. Just put the sauce, meat, and cheese in one pouch and
the bread in another. Heat it up and spread it out like one of those
lunchables.
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[] I_LikeToReddit Canadian Army 5 points 7 months ago

Seems easy.

You are familiar with how easy things and the military work out
right?
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[] mandingoBBC Army Veteran 2 points 7 months ago

You see how fat everyone is these days? Last thing we need. Let em
starve I say
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[] 2sip 1 point 7 months ago


Captain chicken or cordon blue were the bomb
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[] I_LikeToReddit Canadian Army 1 point 7 months ago

They tried this in Canada. It failed utterly.


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[] 89LSC Reservist 1 point 7 months ago

Almost worth coming back to try. But nah


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[] N6Maladroit Retired US Army 1 point 7 months ago

I want to be excited, but there's no way this won't taste like


disappointing ass.. Believe me, I'm an expert at disappointing ass.
However, I miss chicken tetrazzini and the Thai chicken mre. If I could
get a reasonably current one of either, id be happy and magnificently
gassy.

< > discussions in r/Military X

327 36 comments
Marines of Reddit, here is your chance
to help Crayola name their new flavor!

6 of 7 5/7/17, 1:39 PM
The Holy Grail of MREs: military Combat Feeding Directorate is workin... https://www.reddit.com/r/Military/comments/54uzrp/the_holy_grail_of_...

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< > discussions in r/Military X

327 36 comments
Marines of Reddit, here is your chance
to help Crayola name their new flavor!

7 of 7 5/7/17, 1:39 PM