33Volume II-

Article No
1/Ugranam Thiagu
Thatha
There were
times when
Amb herself
came to the
pja, would
come and ask
for sareefrom
Periyava and
take it away. It
happened
during the
camp in
Tiruvidaimarud
ur.if
Periyavastayed
in one place too
long, then the
daily crowd
would thin out.
Devotees from
other
placeswould
come, not so
much the local
devotees.The
pja was
going on. It wa
s about eleven
in the
morning. A
woman who
seemedderange
d stood at the
entrance, facing
the pja,
laughing in a
crazed
fashion. The
watchman
onduty chased
her away but
she would
not leave. The
Manager tried,
again she
would
not leave.Even
as he was
performing the
pja, Periyava
shot a glance at
Ramachandraiy
er for just
afraction of a
moment from
the corner of
his eye. Ramac
handraiyer sent
for me. I
went there
atonce. The
womans saree
was in tatters
on one
side. Immediate
ly guessing that
Periyava
wantedto give a
saree to the
woman, I
rushed to the
store, took out
a new saree,
brought it to
the pjakattu
and placed
it near
Periyava. Periy
ava took it and
flung it
towards the
crazed
woman. She pi
cked it up and g
rinning and lau
ghing ran to the
coconut grove
nearby, wore it,
and throwingth
e old, torn saree
on the ground
began walking
away towards
the canal,
beyond the
fencing.Manick
am who served
in the Matha
followed her to
call her back
and tell her to
take away
theold one. He
later said, I
thought she
was a gypsy
and when she
went away
leaving the old
sareein the
coconut grove,
I wanted her to
remove it
because I could
allow it to be
thrown there.
Whatif the
Master came
that way? But
she went
behind the
fence on the
bank of the
canal and
then just
vanished! She
was nowhere to
be seen. Nor is
the saree which
she removed to
be seen. It
hasvanished
too. There
is something in
this. Only the
Master would
know.Later
Periyava called
Ramachandraiy
er and said
Ramachandrai
yer, the silk
cloth youhad
kept in the
pjakattu to
be use for
Amb was
moth-eaten and
had a hole in
it. You
musttake care
that the cloth is
not torn or
moth-eaten. It
is enjoined that
the house-
holder must
notwear a
torn and darned
dhoti. What
then
about Amb?
So Ambal came
and demanded
a newsaree.
Thiagu would
say you have
incurred an
expense of
fifteen rupees
for the
Matha
because ofyour
carelessness,
which you
could have
avoided had
you been
cautious. Take
care
henceforth!A
variety of silk
known as
ahimsa silk was
used in the
Matha, silk
made from silk
worm thatdied
naturally and
not put to death
for the sake of
making silk.
From that day
onwards,Rama
chandraiyer
would examine
the cloth for the
pjakattu a
dozen times,
very closely
andcarefully,
before
he placed it
there. He was
like
Nandikewara
80
, so loyal and
dedicated.Periy
ava would
perform pja to
his hearts
content. Keep
as many
baskets piled
withflowers as
you can, it
would all be
offered in
worship. Pile
the place with
sandal paste
and silkand
ornaments, it
would all be
used to
decorate the
Divine Mother.
Those sitting
on the otherside
of the curtain
would wait
impatiently for
the bell to ring.
You could take
a trip
aroundMadras
and come back
in time to get
the prasda.
Mahratta
Swami often
told us,
Parameswarah
as taken this
incarnation
just to adore
the Divine
Mother. Siva
got all his
powers
byworshipping
Amb,
and now
Parameswara
is adoring the
Divine
Mother. The
pja would
80

ivas mount,
considered chief of the
Yogis.
34
In the Presence of
the Divine

come to an end
only when
Periyava felt
contented.
Sometimes if it
took very long
we
wouldslowly
part the curtain
and look. We
would
see Periyava
weeping in
bliss
and knocking
hisforehead on
the swing. He
would
shed tears of
joy, and
we would see
his lips
moving in
aninaudible
manner as if
he were talking
to someone. In
fact, we would
keep a small
handloomtowel
there for him to
wipe his tears.
One day I got a
shot on my face
for peeping like
this.The
Tiruppvai-
Tiruvempvai
Conference
81
 which
Periyava
conducted
concluded
atmidnight. Aft
er that Periyava
took his
purificatory bat
h and did the
pourami
pja since it
was afull-moon
night. The
pja went
on and on. The
curtain remaine
d
closed. Only tw
o
or threedevotee
s were
there. Everyone
else had left. It
was about
two in
the night.
I struggled to
keepmy eyes
open. There
was no sign of
the bell ringing.
The night-
guard on watch
rang the
hourly bell twic
e and left to cha
nge guard.Slow
ly, very cautiou
sly, I parted the
curtain, may be
just afingers
space, and
peeped. The
water in one
of the small
golden cups
was
thrown exactly
on myeyes with
the force of a
whiplash,
although
Periyava did
not turn around
and aim at my
face ashe did
so. Everything
happened in a
flash, I lost my
eyesight in both
eyes but not
before I saw
asmall girl-
child, a little
more than an
infant - may be
less than two
years of age -
seated on
theswing with
her legs
hanging down
and Periyava
holding her tiny
feet. It was the
Divine
Motherseated
on the swing.I
had lost
my vision. I
groped around
blindly that
night and the
next day,
my headhangin
g down. I
avoided
meeting anyone
and did not
saying a word
to anyone.
Everyone in
theMatha
said What is it
Thiagu? You
dont seem
well! I did not
tell anyone that
I could not
seeanything. At
two o clock in
the afternoon,
Periyava sent
for me. I went
and prostrated
to him.Periyava
gave me two
grapes and
asked Can you
see me? I
looked up and
just as I had
lost myvision
in a flesh, I got
it back and
could see
Periyava. Is
this the way to
do pja? I
asked.Later
after I got
married
Periyava
directed a great
ri Vidya
upsaka
82
, a descendant
of theHaradatta
83
lineage to
initiate me into
ri Vidya
worship. I was
in
Madavilagam
then. I
knewnothing of
all this and
asked if I had
to chant
mantras. Before
he passed away
my ri Vidya
Guruinitiated
me into odai
84
, which is
never given
to practionners,
except in rare
cases. Periyava
81

Tiruppvai-
Tiruvempvai:
collects of 30
verses and 20
verses celebrating
esoteric union with
ri Narayaa
andiva by the
saints ndal and
Mickavcakar
respectively. It
was Periyava who
brought out these
two texts to
the public
making available
its singing, set to
music. For eight
days from 25-12-
1950, the
Tiruppvai, Thiruv
empvaiand
Tirumurai
conference was
organized in
Tiruvidaimarudur
on Periyavas
suggestion to
promote the
singing ofthese
texts and to create
an awareness
about them. On the
last day Sattur
Subramaniam and
Ariyakudi
RamanujaAyyanga
r sang the
Tiruvempvai &
Tiruvacakam and
Tiruppvai
respectively,
having set it
to appropriate
ragasand having
prepared the
notations
themselves, at
Periyavas behest.
For more details
see Pujyasri Maha
SwamigalVaralaru
(Tamil) by
Sri Sambhamurthi
Sastrigal, Sri
Kuppuswami
Iyer& P.N.
Parasuraman and
pub;ished
byAlliance
Publishers, Mds,
Vol 2.
82
A worshipper of the
Divine Mother
through the practice of

ri Vidya.
83
A great worshipper of

iva & practionner of

ri Vidya; a shrine is
dedicated to him at
Kanjanur
Agneeswaratemple in
Tanjavur district.
84
The highest stage
of ri Vidya,
rarely initiated to
aspirants; its
mantra
known as
Mahoa has
twenty eight seed
35Volume II-
Article No
1/Ugranam Thiagu
Thatha
was near
Chitoor, prior
to returning to
Tamil Nadu
after initiating
Bla Periyava
85
intoasceticism.
I went for
daran.So . . .
your guru has
given you what
is not at all
given to
anyone! said
Periyava.
Yourgrandfathe
r of the fourth
generation
preceding did
odai worship
and that is why
it has
returnedto you
now.About
four or five
years ago,
Periyava asked
me in a dream
why there was
no place forhim
in my house.
That is when
this photograph
was framed and
put up. A week
before my
wife passed aw
ay, this was so
me year ago, sh
e had dream. T
he place was M
elattur, near Th
anjavurwhere
we had both
gone for daran
decades ago
when Periyava
camped
there. She saw
the samescene
again -Periyava
seated in his
mena on the
banks of
the Vettaru. He
beckoned her
towardshim
and signalled to
me to stay
away. In
the morning
she told me
about it. A
little later
thatmorning at
about ten O
clock when we
had both
finished our
meal,
Balakrishnan
came with
a picture that
another friend
had told him
to hand over to
us. It was a
picture of
Periyava seated
inthe mena on
the river-bank,
just as my wife
had seen in her
dream and just
as we had seen
himtogether so
many years ago
in Melattur.My
wife said,
Look at this
picture, just as I
described. You
did not believe
me
then!Periyava
once asked me
in a dream Is
there place
only for you in
this house? Not
for me? Sothat
is how I got
this big picture
framed and
hung up.This
happened on
prathama,
the first day of
the waxing
fortnight. Eight
days later on
navami,the
ninth day, she
passed
away.When the
mind is still the
breath is
paused, this is
kumbhaka
86
in yoga. Each
kumbhakaadds
a year to your
life. The best
thing to do is to
think of
Periyava.
Devotees
would pray
thatPeriyava
live for 200
years.Why
must I ?
Periyava would
ask. Do I not
have limbs like
you do or did
not my parents
giveme birth
even as yours
did you? How
long must I
listen to all
this?My wife
and I went for
daran in the
first week of
January before
Periyava
attainedsiddhi
87
. Periyava said
This is your
last daran. Th
at was our third
visit that
month, that is
thatTamil
month
of Marghzhi. S
o we
thought Periyav
a meant that,
since we
regularly made
threetrips to
him every
month. Balu
who was
serving
Periyava said
that Periyava
was
coughingincess
antly and that
the doctor was
worried. When
Balu went out
for something,
Periyava
lookedup and
touching his
throat gestured
as if to say, Its
nothing. I am
fine. Go
home. As soon
asBalu
returned,
Periyava
dropped his
head on his
chest once
more and
assumed a
former
posture.Eight
days later we
understood
what Periyava
had meant by
the words This
is your last
daran.
syllables,
excluding the first
praava (the primo
rdial AUM)
85
lit. child elder; a
term used for ri
ankara
VijayendraSarasva
ti
86
Kumbha is pot and
the body is suffused
with the vital air that is
unmoving
87

siddhi;
lit. fruition, refers
to a saints merger
with the divine

36
 In the Presence of
the Divine

That day I was

in Tiruchi and
my brother was
conducting
Radha
Kalyanam
88
but I had been
seized with a
bout of
shivering at
mid-day and
felt restless.
When I got the
news I wanted
toreach
Kanchipuram,
but how could
I. A lorry driver
spotted me on
the road and
stopping
ofhisown
accord, said
that he was
going to
Chengelpet and
offered to give
me a lift for
threerupees. He
never took the
money. I
reached
Chengelpet by
four the next
day,
Kanchipuram
bysix and the
Matha by
nine o clock.
Periyavas
grace is always
there. Dont ask
for
anythingexcept
to see him
often. Nothing
saves one like
devotion to
the Guru. It can
make you roll
amountain like
Anjaneya and
fill you with a
unique bliss.
We once had to
catch a train
forSankara
Iyer, which
left Egmore at
seven in the
evening. Periya
va told him
to board it
atVillupuram.
We left
Poonamalle
and in just an
hour and a half
reached
Villupuram,
God
knowshow!
Close your eyes
and think of
him and he will
play on your
lap like a child.
Memory is
whatmatters,
memory of
him,
always.******
************
************
************
************
************
************
88

Lit. Radhas
wedding;
The celebration of
the union of Radha
and Krishna
through the
singing of Saint
Jayadevas22 (out
of the 24) Atapadi
hymns that
describe
the mystic merger
of the individual
soul with the Lord
symbolizedthroug
h Radha and
Krishna
respectively; the
music is intended
as congregational
singing co-opted
into set
structuresand
formalized in
classical tunes;
often held in
houses as a
preface to events
such as weddings.
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