Choose Right & Sexual Purity

Choosing a life partner is the biggest decision you can ever make besides choosing to
embrace Jesus Christ as Savior.
Contemplation on marriage carries with it choices in our hands as whether to marry,
who to marry, when to marry and so on. There is a sense of freedom to choose whoever
it will be as we follow the throbbing of our hearts and chemistry.
But we have to be fully aware that she will mother your children and share your name.
He will father your children and you and your children will all bear his name. The
contemplation in choice should be helped by the fact that God is not only your Father,
but he is going to be your Father-in-law as well.
You are taking up his child whom he loves so much and he will want to continue and
increase the expression of his love to his daughter or son through you. He wants them to
be loved like they have never been loved before, or like they will never be loved again.
Because God gave His children the capacity to love as He loves, He can command His
love from them.
That means love is a choice we makeit is an act of our will as well as our heart.
Choice then, becomes is serious business that requires soberness and a vibrant
connection with God as individuals explore and attempt to connect with one another.
They should do so in such a way that in the end they may declare that, houses and
wealth are inherited from parents, but a prudent wife is from the Lord (Prov. 19:14).
Our culture has embraced a rather absurd notion that there is just one person who can
"complete us". This is a disastrous mindset with which to approach a lifelong marital
decision. The real danger in this line of thinking is that many people mistake a storm of
emotion as the identifying mark of their soul mate.
Such individuals marry on an infatuation blast without seriously considering character,
compatibility, life goals, family desires, spiritual health, and other important concerns.
Then when the music fades and the relationship requires work, one or both partners
suddenly discover that they were "mistaken". They start to think: this person must not
be my soul mate after all! Otherwise, it wouldn't be so much work. Next, they panic
saying that their soul mate must still be out there!
Such people can't get to divorce court fast enough, lest someone steal their "one true
soul mate" meant only for them. When people get married for trivial reasons, they also
tend to seek divorce or separation for trivial reasons.
Christians have a variety of views regarding selecting a husband or wife according to
the will of God. Many Christians fear that they might go out of the will of God or miss
out on Gods best for them. Many believe that there is only one person whom the
Lord has selected for each Christian and it is up to each Christian to find that person.
At first sight they say: this person is the right one according to the will of God.
Christians often feel that couples get divorced because they have married the wrong
person. Are all these beliefs true? Are these principles lined up with what the Bible
teaches? Finding the right one is synonymous with finding Gods will in general.
"Is he or she the right one?"
This is the wrong question to ask. The right question, which the Scriptures teach is this
one, Is he or she the right kind of person to marry?" Prov.18:22 says, He who finds a
wife finds what is good, and receives favor from the Lord." Finding one is the good and
successful venture. One described as a good spouse is not necessarily at a godly
standard.
So, do not pray for good spouses but godly husbands and wives. Good leans more on
a human definition; but there is no doubt that godly is on a biblical standard. That is
what we can embrace as a sacred search.
In the sacred search, it is not so much about who you marry; but why you marry.
Actually, the why leads you to whether you marry and who you marry when you do.
The why points to your vison for life in glorifying God, and that becomes the measure
by which you search. Your search has more of God in view than you.
You stop looking for a soul mate and started looking for a sole matesomeone who
will live out with you the great purpose of God. The reason is that God didnt design
marriage relationships to make us happy initially, but to make us holy by priority.
The Seriousness of Choice: Who will it be?
Scriptures affirm that, He who finds a wife finds a good thing..(and) A good wife,
who can find? (Prov. 18:22; 31:10). To find a wife or husband is a choice, and to find a
good one is even better venture. There is no ultimate soul-mate. We only end up with
sole-mates in our choices.
In fact, attraction is often mistaken for rightness in our storm-of-emotion choices. To
find is a choice and not a prearrangement. God knows it ahead of time and can influence
it as we seek his guidance, but it remains a personal choice.
That is why we can make a wrong choice or a right choice when it comes to marriage.
Upon marriage, the spouse is to become the right person for you. The right one becomes
the only one as well, closing the chapter of choices.

Our choices are not beyond Gods providence to change and build us, perfecting us
whether in this life sooner or later for the life to come.

The sacred search leads one to choose whomever you desire to marry as long as you
choose the right kind of person according to God's priorities.
That is the normal biblical approach in these non-moral areas. You must also commit
yourself to follow God's standards for marriage. Gods will is that Christians marry
Christians.
The first and foundational priority is that he or she is a Christian (2 Cor.6:14-16). Does
this person truly trust Jesus? Dont compromise on this point. Dont become unequally
yoked with someone who doesnt share your most fundamental identity in life (2 Cor.
6:14).
Christ must be the foundation of the relationship, with both of you looking to him,
trusting in him, and laughing together at the days to come. Now there is no need to
consider this if you yourself are not anchored in Jesus. But that would be unfortunate
because life outside Christ is lost even with its best endeavors.
You also must look ahead to the fact that Christian marriage is for keeps and divorce is
no option whatsoever. All others things that guide you to a spouse are preferences.
They include finding a person along your vision for marriage. Your vision for marriage
was shaped by your background and it answers what exactly you are seeking in
marriage. There is what you look for as a good one. Good is only your definition along
your culture, values, family core distinctives, personal preferences, society and social
trends
To find the right person, you must be the right person because a crab catches a crab.
Who you are is who you end up with. That challenge is how we define what right is.
Hobbies are not enough; likes and likes and dislikes are not the anchor. The connection
is first and foremost spiritual; the rest are expressions of that communion.
What makes a Good or Bad Choice for marriage partner?
In a biblical view, there is not "one right choice" for marriage, but rather good and bad
choices. We are encouraged to use wisdom as our guide when choosing a marital
partner. There is no indication that God creates "one" person for us to marry.
Consider, for example, Paul's advice in 1 Corinthians 7:1-9. He clearly leaves the choice
of marriage up to us; there are benefits to singleness, and benefits to being married.
There is no hint at all of finding "the one person" that God created "just for you." It's far
more a pragmatic choice, which I am saying should be founded in Christ for Gods
glory.
One purpose for dealing with the dangers of marriage is to warn those who would enter
into marriage casually, without serious consideration of the consequences of their
decision. When one
Understanding of biblical masculinity & femininity
Masculinity and femininity belong at the center of God's ultimate purpose. When God
described the glorious work of His Son as the sacrifice of a husband for his bride,
he was telling us why he made us male and female. He made us this way so that our
maleness and femaleness would display more fully the glory of His Son in relationship
to His blood-bought bride, the church.
This means that if any woman tried to reduce her womanhood to physical looks or
features of biological functions and then determine her role in life purely on the basis of
competencies, she not only misses the point of womanhood, she also diminishes the
glory of Christ in her own life.
If any man tried to reduce his masculinity to physical strength, mental capacity or
abilities of biological functions and then determine his role in life purely on the basis of
such competencies, he not only misses the point of manhood, he also undermines what
really defines a godly man on whom the crown of Christ rests.
SEXUALITY AND SPIRITUALITY
Is there a connection between spirituality and sexuality? How do we reaffirm in a
biblical sense, Gods design for sexuality our maleness and femaleness? Let us try to
exposing the deeper meaning behind sexual thoughts.
Unmasking the Great Unmentionable
While growing up, most of us never bothered consulting our parents on matters of
sexuality as they would have died of embarrassment and locked us in our rooms until
we were 40.
And we certainly didnt ask our spiritual leader, because we probably figured the
Reverends would have banned us from the church building altogether if they had found
what kind of sexual thoughts actually go through our heads -- even on Sundaysafter
weve taken communion! Sometimes even while were taking communion!
But I tried as a young boy and inquired how my mother had acquired my younger sister.
Once I was educated that she got her from a baby shop which is in the hospital I stepped
out as an educated lad and shared with my older friends with great joy, how we got a
new baby.
They laughed at me as an idiot. I went back to my mother for confirmation and received
a hot memorable slap never to bother her over such issues again. Since then, I received
sex education from my peers who were better informed, less caring and often bad
influencers which was unfortunate.
Are our spirituality and sexuality integrated? We have to ask where our sexual thoughts
come from and whether what we do with them bear spiritual implications. And how far
can we go in satisfying these overwhelming longings that we sometimes feel without
offending God who created us with such feelings?
Exposing the Deeper Meaning behind Sexual Thoughts
Trying to make perfect sense out of two such complex mysteries our sexuality and our
spirituality can feel as frustrating and fruitless as trying to brush our teeth while eating
a Rolex. We all have to wonder at times
Where do our sexual thoughts come from?
What do we do with them?
Where are the mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual boundary lines?
Can we be holy and horny at the same time?
How far can we go in satisfying these overwhelming longings that we
sometimes feel?
Or, perhaps a better question for some to ask is, If Im a sexual being, why
dont I experience any sexual longings at all? But if I do, how am I to handle
them?
If sexuality is Gods invention, and it is, then we should be able to find in Gods Word, a
roadmap as we search for answers to our questions about all-things-sexual.
However, if we fear that our request will be met with hockhorrordisgust fear
anxietysuspicionjudgment, perhaps even with bulging eyes and popping neck
veins, then we will not be able to navigate our way through this foreign territory.
If we do not teach these things, they will still be alive in us, and society will teach them
to us. Ignoring the elephant in all of our living room certainly wont make it disappear.
In fact, ignoring that elephant is causing it to mysteriously grow larger and larger.
Exploring the Deeper Meaning behind Sexual Thoughts
This roadmap to understanding both our sexuality and our spirituality is actually
comprised of our deepest, most intimate personal sexual fantasies.
We are both spiritual and sexual beings. And behind every sexual longing, theres an
even deeper spiritual longing. So, there is always much to learn about God through our
understanding of human sexuality, and there is much to learn about our sexuality
through a deeper exploration of God.
There is a deeper spiritual longing beneath our sexual longings. Looking at sexuality
through a spiritual lens, and vice versa, is not a new concept. In the Song of Solomon, a
man's and womans desires for healthy sexual intimacy are celebrated.
In the book of Hosea, God uses the analogy of a husbands relentless pursuit of a
sexually unfaithful bride to illustrate the depth of His own passion and commitment to
His people. God obviously knew that sexual metaphors would teach us about
ourselves and about Him.
The connection between sexuality and spirituality is the equivalent of the connection
between body and spirit.
There is spiritual energy we are given as humans who are made in the image of God.
Then there is our body as the conduit through which that energy flows.
Without the conduit (the body), there would be no way for us to experience that energy
and let it flow from ourselves to another human being in the totality of spirituality. But
without the spiritual energy, our bodies by themselves cannot helpfully gather the
human connection with God which we naturally crave.
Many try to engage the conduits of their bodies. But without the flow of spiritual
energy, they end up in human outlets for their physical sexual desiresmanipulative
seduction, child molestation, sexual abuse, sexual addiction, prostitution, human
trafficking and it wears all kinds of ugly masks.
But a physical connection to someone with whom we also share a strong spiritual and
emotional bond, thats something else entirely. Thats pure love . . . romance . . .
passion . . . intimacy . . . ecstasy . . . euphoria.
When youre expressing your sexuality in the way God our Designer intended, there is
an enormous, undeniable connection between sexuality and spirituality. The way God
created us is that we are spiritual people and our sexuality woman hood and manhood
work out within our God-given spiritual capacity.
Catholic priests, monks, or nuns whove pledged themselves to a lifestyle of celibacy, or
single people who are purposely holding out for marriage are still sexual beings, and
will remain so. You simply cant take the spirit out of the body (at least not until that
body is dead). Just like you cant separate two sides of the same coin.
Its all swirled together, sexuality and spirituality, never to be separated. So, since we
cant possibly separate the body and spirit, or sexuality and spirituality, we ought to see
what we can learn from fully integrating and celebrating the synergy between the two,
because that is how God created us.
However, in the absence of genuine sexual intimacy (best defined as in-to-me-see),
we settle for sexual intensity: erotica, pornography, an office romance, an extramarital
affair or whatever strokes the ego and provides the sexual high we crave.
All humans have two things in common: We are both spiritual and sexual beings. And
behind every sexual longing, there is an even deeper spiritual longing. So, we have
much to learn about God through understanding our sexuality, and there is much to learn
about our sexuality through a deeper exploration of God.
Fantasy is not evil, even sexual fantasy. But when we divorce physical pleasure from
emotional connection, such as when we selfishly strive for orgasm through
pornography, masturbation or illicit sexual encounters rather than cultivating sexual
ecstasy with our marriage partner, sexual ecstasy is only half-baked.
Love and relational intimacy are the yeast that allows our sexual ecstasy to rise to its
highest and God-honoring level.
We often seek healing for our deepest wounds via sexual encounters. Our minds and
hearts believe we will get it right or find the love I need via an intensely satisfying
sexual relationship. If deep and spiritual intimacy is what humans seek, then relational
or sexual intensity can never satisfy our deepest longings or heal our oldest wounds.
People with sexual struggles often find it difficult to connect on an intimate spiritual
level with others, but this is precisely the best prescription for understanding and
overcoming any issue. Our sexual wounds originate in relationship, so were more
likely to find healing in relationships.
We all have our struggles. We all have our secrets. We are far more alike than we are
different.
The enduring questions have to do with what God has said in his Word and how God
feels about our sexual thoughts and fantasies. Serious spiritual implications lie in what
we do with our sexual thoughts amounting to purity or impurity; moral or immoral;
good or evil and the resultant ways in which we have acted on such thoughts.
Sexuality (maleness and femaleness) is one of the most important aspects in helping us
to understand who we are and how we relate. It is also on the basis of human sexuality
that we understand sexual purity.
The most pure undertakings of life are associated with sex and sexuality and they can
render us pure and righteous or impure, filthy and defiled in body, mind and spirit.
Several specific sexual relationships are forbidden in the Bible.
Among these are homosexuality, bestiality (sex with animals), and incest (sexual
relations with close family members, fornication (sexual relations outside of marriage)
and adultery (sexual relations with another person's spouse), and rape (forced sex). To
emphasize the seriousness of these kinds of offenses, the penalty was death (Lev. 20:10-
21)
Sexual Purity: Do you not know?
Christians are to avoid all forms of sexual sin, since the Christian's body is the indwelt
by the Holy Spirit. The Bible says that those who are sexually immoral are separated
from God and will not share in God's inheritance upon death.
1 Cor. 6:9-20 9Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God?
Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male
prostitutes nor homosexual offenders 10nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor
slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11And that is what some of
you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of
the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
13
.....The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the
body. 15Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then
take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! 16Do you not know
that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, "The
two will become one flesh." 17But he who unites himself with the Lord is one with him
in spirit.
18
Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he
who sins sexually sins against his own body. 19Do you not know that your body is a
temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are
not your own; 20you were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your body.
In a marriage context, oneness on the level of spirit and soul provides the basis for
physical oneness in marriage. From a biblical standpoint, sex should not be regarded as
"making love" but as expressing love. Sexual intimacy was designed to be an expression
of spiritual and psychological (mental, emotional, and volitional) intimacy.
The two bodies that come together should house two persons who are already together.
The sexual relationship was never intended to lead to a good marriage, but to be the
product of a good marriage.
Our culture has cheapened and debased the idea of sexuality by minimizing this
dimension of personal meaning and ignoring the boundaries originally set by God.
Sex has become associated with coarse humor, promiscuity, obsession, perversion,
exploitation, and abuse. It is an oppressive master of those who pursue physical pleasure
as a solution for their personal problems.
We should never forget that when we are dealing with any pleasure in its healthy and
normal and satisfying form, we are, in a sense, on the enemy's ground.
Reversing the apparent trend toward sexual purity
I must be the only person in my church who struggles with inappropriate sexual
thoughts and fantasies. We all have our struggles. We all have our secrets. We are far
more alike than we are different.
The critical questions to ask are:
How does God feel about our sexual thoughts and fantasies?
And what about the times Ive acted on them in ways I shouldnt have?
Is my personal life shaped by my beliefs, ideals, and traditions as it once was?
Is my faith effectively shaping my integrity as a Christian?
Do my beliefs make a difference in my private sexual life?
Developing sexual purity
First, recognize that purity is possible
Second, know that sexual intensity does not translate into sexual intimacy and sexual
intensity is simply not the same as intimacy. If it were, then prostitutes and porn stars
would be the most emotionally and relationally fulfilled people on the planet. That
doesnt seem to be the case.
If deep and spiritual intimacy is what humans seek, then relational or sexual intensity
can never satisfy our deepest longings or heal our oldest wounds. Soul-deep intimacy is
what we seek, and its ultimately found in the God who created human sexuality.
Maintaining sexual purity
There are a number of countermeasures that correspond to each ones situation
recognize and reflect upon the consequences of sexual sin
practice personal accountability
Watch the imaginations of the heart
We cannot close our eyes to the biblical understanding of the heart and the wicked
imaginations of their own hearts. Evil desires and evil behaviors are the supreme threat.
They are spawned from the deep motivations of a heart that resists repentance and the
will of God.
These deep motivations create a false reality of ones own making that denies the reality
of God. It is critical to understand that whatever a person thinks they know theologically
and spiritually their mind is affected by the imaginations of his heart.
The truth of righteousness is replaced by the lie of impurity; what is not God becomes a
god. The unthinkable then becomes the possible, and even the doable. A life driven to
sexual sin reflects thinking that has long been infected by sensual images and self-
pleasure.
These thoughts may have become so common that a person is hardly aware of them.
Therefore, what one knows or thinks they know theologically and biblically is less
important than the imaginations of his heart that eventually cause him to act out what he
thinks.
A person may justify the imaginations of his heart by his past and present pain. One then
finds relief through false intimacy or they may actualize their imaginations through
sexual encounters with needy women who are looking for a listening ear or a man
seeking use a woman sexually.
In the end, people are deceived into believing their relational needs will be met and their
search for significance secured through these activities. Only a biblical paradigm of the
heart will effectively alert them to these mortal dangers to the soul.
Everyone has sinned, and one of the results of sin is guilt. We can be thankful for guilty
feelings because they drive us to seek forgiveness.
The moment a person turns from sin to Jesus Christ in faith, his sin is forgiven.
Repentance is part of the faith that leads to salvation (Matthew 3:2; 4:17; Acts 3:19).
In Christ, even the most heinous sins are blotted. Salvation is by grace, and grace
forgives. After a person is saved, he will still sin, and when he does, God still promises
forgiveness. But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the Father in our
defenseJesus Christ, the Righteous One (1 John 2:1).
Freedom from sin, however, does not always mean freedom from guilty feelings. Even
when our sins are forgiven, we still remember them.
Also, we have a spiritual enemy, called the accuser of our brothers (Rev.12:10) who
relentlessly reminds us of our failures, faults, and sins. When a Christian experiences
feelings of guilt, he or she should do the following things:
1) Confess all known, previously unconfessed sin. In some cases, feelings of guilt are
appropriate because confession is needed. Many times, we feel guilty because we are
guilty! (Ps. 32:3-5.) Ps. 32 is a very profitable study. Restoration and joy are the results.
2) Ask the Lord to reveal any other sin that may need confessing. Have the courage to be
completely open and honest before the Lord. (Ps. 139:23-24).
3) Trust the promise of God that He will forgive sin and remove guilt, based on the
blood of Christ (1 John 1:9; Ps. 85:2; 86:5; Rom 8:1).
4) On occasions when guilty feelings arise over sins already confessed and forsaken,
reject such feelings as false guilt. The Lord has been true to His promise to forgive.
Read and meditate on Ps. 103:8-12.
5) Ask the Lord to rebuke Satan, your accuser, and ask the Lord to restore the joy that
comes with freedom from guilt (Ps. 51:12).
Whisper to God, Im so sorry for the way Ive run to boys or girls, men or women,
seeking to share intimate moments with them for satisfaction rather than running to you,
Lord!
Finally, if sin has been confessed, repented of, and forgiven, it is time to move on.
Remember that we who have come to Christ have been made new creatures in Him.
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has
come! (2 Cor. 5:17). Part of the old which has gone is the remembrance of past sins
and the guilt they produced (1 Thess. 4:3-5).
Facts that can help our understanding of sexual purity.
1. Sex is good. God created it, God called it good, and it existed before there was
any sin in the world. Sex was created by the holy God of heaven, where purity reigns.
When it takes place in its proper context, God is definitely pro-sex.
2. Like all good gifts from God, sex can be misused and perverted.
Water is a gift of God, without which we couldnt survive. But floods and tidal waves
are water out of control, and the effects are devastating. Fire is an energy-producing gift
of God that gives warmth and allows us to cook. Water and fire are good things which,
when they occur outside their God-intended boundaries, become bad.
Likewise, God designed sex to exist within certain boundaries. When exercised in line
with Gods intended purpose, it is beautiful and constructive. When out of control,
violating Gods intended purpose, it becomes ugly and destructive.
The problem isnt sexthe problem is us. Were sinners who can pervert, abuse, and rip
away from their proper place the good things God created. The greater the gift from
God, the more power it has both for good and bad. Inside marriage, sex has great power
for good. Outside marriage it has equally great power for bad.
3. The boundaries of sex are the boundaries of marriage.
Sex is a privilege inseparable from the responsibilities of the sacred marriage covenant.
To exercise the privilege apart from the responsibility perverts Gods intention for sex.
This thing of But we really love each other has no bearing on the ethics of sexual
intimacy because sex does not become permissible through subjective feelings, but
through the objective lifelong commitment of marriage.
4. Your sexual purity is essential to your walk with God.
Sexual purity is not an option for an obedient Christian, its a requirement. Gods will is
centered on our character and moral purity much more than on our circumstances. There
is no sense seeking Gods will in other areas when you are choosing to live in sexual
impurity in your mind or body (Ps.24:3-4; Ps. 66:18; Prov. 28:9; Zech. 7:13)
Sexual purity is inseparable from a committed Christian life.
5. You are vulnerable to sexual immorality.
Dont kid yourself that it can never happen to youit can. And if you dont think it can,
it almost certainly will. (Proverbs 16:18; 1 Cor. 10:12; Galatians 6:1)
6. You are targeted for sexual immorality.
The more involved you are in serving Christ, the greater vested interests Satan has in
destroying you and Gods work in and through you. The evil one wants to take you
down and to use your life as a bad example to other Christians, who will imitate your
moral compromise. Be self-controlled and alert (1 Peter 5:8).
7. Your body belongs to God, not you.
"You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your
body (I Cor. 6:20).
8. Sexual purity begins in the mind, not the body. (Prov. 23:7; Matt. 15:19-20; 5:28).
You will inevitably adopt the morality of the programs, movies, books, magazines,
music, Internet sites and conversations you participate in. The cognitive is basic to the
behavioral, so you become what you choose to feed your mind on.
Sow a thought, reap an action; Sow an action, reap a habit. Sow a habit, reap a
character. Sow a character, reap a destiny. Actions, habits, character and destiny all start
with a thought, and thoughts are fostered by what we choose to take into our minds.
Therefore, we should take extreme care about what we feed our minds on. Above all
else, guard your heart [mind, inner being], for it is the wellspring of life (Prov. 4:23;
Ps. 119:37; Phil. 4:8).
If someone wants to pollute water, he pollutes it at its source. If he wants to purify
water, he purifies it at its source. Our thoughts are the source of our lives. All our lives
flow from our mind, and through the choices we make every day we program our
minds, either for godliness or ungodliness.
Your future can be accurately predicted by what you allow your mind to dwell on.
Sinful actions dont come out of nowhere; they are the cumulative product of little
moral compromises made over time, which ultimately culminate in ungodly behavior.

9. Since God doesnt want you to have premarital sex, neither does he want you to
do that which prepares your body for premarital sex. How far can I go? This is a
common question, but it isnt the best question because usually it means how close can
I get to disobeying God without actually doing it?

God made the body and mind with sex drives, and as those drives are stimulated they
move toward a climaxthis is a simple fact of life that no one should be nave about.
If you want a different outcome, you must make different choices (2 Tim. 2:22)

10. Once you let your body cross the line, it will neither know nor care about your
Christian convictions. Some Christians pray God will protect their purity, then
willfully put themselves into temptation and wonder why God didnt answer their
prayer. No matter how fervently you pray that you will not fall into immorality, you will
fall if you continue to make choices that feed your temptation toward immorality. Dont
allow your choices to undermine and invalidate your prayers.
11. If you have sexual intimacy with someone outside marriage, you are stealing
from God and the other person. Youll be held accountable.
12. God has your best interests in mind when he tells you to pursue sexual purity.
Sex is not just something you dosex is someone you are. It is linked to the welfare of
your whole person. Having sex outside of marriage is self-destructive in every sense.
Sexual purity is always for the bestnot only for God and others, but for you.
13. God would not tell you to abstain from impurity if it was impossible to obey
him. God doesnt command you to abstain from necessities, such as eating or drinking
or breathing. Sex is something everyone can abstain fromit is a strong desire, yes, but
never an emergency, never a necessity. Christ has given us the resources to resist every
temptation (Titus 2:12).
14. Satan will lie to you about sex, but Jesus tells you the truth. (John 8:43-44).
Many young people end up angry and bitter at themselves and others because they
bought the lie, the relationship is ruined and now they are paying the price. Identify and
meditate on the truths Christ tells you. Identify and reject the lies Satan tells you.
15. You must learn to think long term, not short term.
Good or bad, you will always reap what you sowyou will always harvest the
consequences of your choices (Gal. 6:7-9). The lifelong consequences of sexual
impurity are worse than we can imagine. The lifelong rewards of sexual purity are
greater than we can imagine.

TALKING POINT:
What can and will you specifically do to diminish your vulnerability to sexual sin?
How should you as a Christian, deal with feelings of guilt regarding past sexual
sins, whether pre- or post-salvation?

'Be Mr./Miss Right'