KEY TO A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE LIFE

First Bible LESSON EPHESIANS Chapter 5 verse 25

"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himse
lf for it."
Second Bible LESSON COLOSSIANS Chapter 3 verse 18
"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord."
GOLDEN TEXT: 1st PETER Chapter 3 verse 8
"Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as breth
ren, be pitiful, be courteous."
MARRIAGE is a holy institution headed by Christ. It entails a lot of sacrifice i
n love on the part of the couples. The husband should love his wife as Christ lo
ves his church. And what Christ is to his Church so must a husband be to his wif
e, a Pastor and a Comforter.
Love is the Bridegroom's commandment. It is not the deed of man, but of God that
a man should love his wife. Christ as the shepherd of the church, loves and pro
tects her. He takes care to ensure that no sheep goes astray. The husband has th
e same duty towards his wife.
To marry is not a difficult question. But can you be the keeper and lover of you
r wife? This means laying down your life for your wife. If the marriage home is
not in peace, the husband is answerable. He is not a good Pastor.
If the wife goes astray, and is perished, God will demand her soul from her husb
and.
God does not know the woman, but he places everything under the care of the man.
And God uses the responsibility of caring for the wife to test the man to see w
hether he will love his wife as Christ loves him, (the husband).
If a husband wants to apply God's example of love to wedlock, they should first
of all ask themselves whether they have received his instructions. Christ is tel
ling all husbands to take good care of their wives and children, and to keep the
m as a good Pastor does to his flock, guiding his life that the sheep may live.
He has warned us, that if a man does not love his wife, his prayers will not be
heard by God.
But, how many husbands today are ready to learn of Christ? For our sake, Christ
suffered to the end; so that for our wives, we may likewise suffer as good Sheph
erds.
What day has Christ scourged you? What day has he cursed or pronounced woe unto
you? What day has he refused to give you food? Or said unto you: "From today, I
don't want you again, go away to your mother." What day has Christ told you: "Th
is house is mine, I do not want you." Has he ever told you not to touch anything
because you have brought nothing into this world? No, never, Christ is the Brid
egroom without blemish.
But contrary to Christ's expectations and instructions, husbands today are selfi
sh and cause division in the home. They maintain strictly exclusive ownership ov
er this or that thing in the house, whereas, husband and wife should have the sa
me right over everything in the house.
They should share the same trunk, box, spoon, plate and cup. There should be no
harm in the husband using the wife's wrappers, and vice-versa: they should have
everything in common.
Yet, instead of heeding Christ's instructions, some husbands treat their wives s
pitefully, disgracing them whenever and wherever they like. They boast, they can
marry as many women as they like, and in their foolishness, forget that any Pas
tor who cannot take care of a single sheep, cannot in anyway be safely trusted w
ith two; let alone more.
The Consequences:
Look around the world today and see how men suffer the consequences of the ill-t
reatment they give their wives. Through their negligence, they wreck the marriag
e home. Tribulations, litigation, fear, illness and wrath are among the things a
ny husband, who does not love his wife, is most liable to suffer.
Danger of Polygamy:
Since it is so difficult to successfully be the husband of one wife, polygamy is
a real danger we should dread. The man who ill-treats his wife with the hope th
at he can marry another tomorrow, should note the danger to which he has exposed
himself.
This gospel has peace to offer to those who do it, and war to wage against all t
hose who do not do it.
First Bible LESSON EPHESIANS Chapter 5 verse 25
"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himse
lf for it."
Some people claim, they are behaving as Europeans, first, by living a happy marr
ied life. This is not true. The only fact is, Europeans first embraced Christian
ity, and have successfully applied the principle of love in marriage life. So th
e man who behaves well in marriage life, is not doing as Europeans, but is doing
the word of God as Christ is doing in showing perfect love towards his Church.
Precious:
Of all things in the world, what is most precious to a man is his wife. She is a
lifetime cross the man has to carry till death separates them. All truth, humil
ity, longsuffering and patience should be employed by the husband in the love fo
r his wife. She is the only person with whom you are one flesh in this world. So
mething you do to your wife is something you do to yourself.
Not Money:
Money does not show love in marriage. First ask yourself whether you will be abl
e to carry your wife's cross during sickness, tribulation, want and misfortune.
You are her father in tribulation. You are also her mother. You are her brother,
sister, and husband. You are her all in all. You cannot think of her clothes, h
ealth and food without thinking of how you can supply them.
Disappointment:
But disappointment comes when the man who is supposed to be provident in love, c
omfort and Godliness chooses to deprive his wife of all these rights, simply bec
ause he prefers wine, hotel and outside women to his wife.
He leaves his wife too worried to be comfortable. The bad husband causes his wif
e to wander and go lost like a sheep without a Shepherd.
Punishment:
And what punishment awaits such husbands. Their punishment should be heavy, for
there is no reason why the love of a husband should be turned from his wife to c
inema, bar and outside women. If we care to examine why should we do things, whi
le our wives are refused scratchy crumbs? Why should we give them stone for brea
d?
Why then should our wives knock and we refuse to open and admit them into our bo
wels of love. Why should we be stone-hearted against the weaker vessel of the Lo
rd.
Why should we desert them in their Poverty. Why should we be bad Shepherds and a
nti-Christs.
Christ Surrendered His Wealth:
Christ saw how poor we were and so, came and surrendered all his property and he
avenly glory, and suffered that we might be filled.
He saw how weak we were and so, surrendered all his strength also that we might
be strengthened. But if we fail to follow this example in loving our wives, our
punishment is indeed great. We are created in the image of God and Christ. If we
do not love our wives, we are no more in the image of Christ, and God is no mor
e in us.
Wife Finds God In Her Husband:
All the above mentioned Godly qualities, which Christ shows towards us and His C
hurch, are expected to be seen by the wife in her husband. She finds God in her
husband. But supposing the husband does not care to seek, find and abide in God
and his Christ, how can the wife see God in him?
How can marriage be successful without the head-Christ? Any husband who hasn't h
ad Christ, is useless; and a house where the man is useless is good for nothing.
Ruined:
Before now, you were saying: "someone has spoiled my house." But now, you have s
een that by telling lies to your wife, causing division in anything with her, an
d by not loving her as you should, you are the sole cause of unhappiness in your
home. Accept Christ as the head of your house, otherwise you are ruined already
.
Judgment:
If you do not love your wife, you cannot do the work of God and God cannot give
you God fearing children.
You cannot have any good thing in life. Because you cast your wife out, you have
cast out Christ and all good things. If you desert her, and sleep in some corne
r in the town you have deserted Christ.
You have exposed her to the danger of death. You have crucified Christ a second
time. You are a murderer. Cain was asked by God: "Man, where is thy Brother?" On
the judgement day the husband will be asked: "Man, where is thy wife?" How will
you be saved if you are a bad husband.
You Need Christ:
To be a good husband or good Shepherd, you need no money, drink or medicine as y
ou need Christ. You should use Christ's instructions to keep your family away fr
om sin, or else, their sins will be counted against you.
Christ is calling upon all husbands to come and learn of Him, how to care for th
e flock and lay down their lives for them; how to love them and have peace and l
ife eternal. Christ is calling all men. To start rolling on Jesus' feet and rece
iving instructions from him, is to start being a good enough husband.
The husband's love for his wife must be reciprocated. Therefore, not only the hu
sband needs Christ, the wife also should be a good Christian. She should take Ch
rist's instructions.
Second Bible LESSON COLOSSIANS Chapter 3 verse 18
"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord."
Dear Brethren, have you seen the other problem: wives? And you wives who have qu
arreled with your husbands before coming to Church today, and had you not told y
our husband when you parted with him in discord, that you had better parted with
the foolish man; but you will never part with your God? And are you sure that y
ou have not parted with your God already?
Does a wife who does not submit to her husband remain with God any longer? It do
es not matter whether you are a millionaire, while your husband is a pauper, you
must submit to him. And of course, through you, your husband should rise and be
the same millionaire that you are. He should be what you are and more. He shoul
d always be your husband, and you his wife submitting to him in all respects.
No Secret:
Why then should a woman take her money to a nearby relation to keep for her. Why
should that distant brother be the keeper of her box, while her husband is igno
rant of the whole affair? Who authorizes the woman to claim, she bought this pot
or that knife for her husband or that she brought these things from her parent'
s house.
Infact, the wife has nothing of her own. All she has belongs to the husband also
. From the day your husband takes you away from your parents, with all your know
ledge, beauty from head to toe, with all your vices and virtue, you belong to hi
m all in all.
It becomes your bounding duty to take his instructions. If you cling to your old
habits, without allowing them to be modified or eradicated by him, you are expo
sed to danger.
Any woman who considers it difficult to regard her husband as her own father had
better stayed back a spinster for, she cannot be a house wife. But today, who a
mong black and white women will not throw back five for one word of rebuke from
the husband?
How many women abide by the advice of their husbands? How many regard their husb
ands as their Lords. Apart from Christ, the wife has no other King than her husb
and. The parents are not as important to the woman as her husband.
Respect:
Any woman whether black or white who respects her husband respects Christ; and a
ny woman who submits to her husband submits to Christ. Why then, should women wh
o are married wear their marriage rings to go and mess up with other men? I wond
er why such women should be called human beings any longer. All your body belong
s to your husband exclusively.
Even you have no right to converse with another man on the road, without the per
mission of your husband. You have no power of your own. You have no right to wea
r anything you like, or to appear any how, or in any fashion your husband does n
ot approve of.
Husband's Permission:
You are not permitted to plan or think differently from your husband. It is a si
n for you to give anybody a penny without the permission of your husband.
You are not permitted to argue with him. As the heaven is high above the earth,
so is the man's wisdom above that of the woman.
Some women assume too much for the fact that some of them are Queens, Ministers
or Prime Ministers. All these are meant to be controlled by men, their position
not withstanding. Education has nothing to do in marriage. Money does not give a
woman a mandate to be above her husband. Nothing does.
There are some women who think, once they have used their beauty to entrap a man
into marriage, they are free afterwards to behave as they like, hoping to use t
heir beauty as an irresistible influence. But I tell you such women had better g
one to hell with their beauty.
It were better they are called "beauty-dung," submitting it under the husband's
feet for the sake of happy marriage, than to face the consequences of the misuse
of their beauty in marriage. For they are bound to suffer in the end.
There is another set of women who want to live a free life, and hope to succeed
more by having men they simply call "husband." They, therefore, use their money
to engage poor, simple men whom they hope to control with the influence of money
favours. This is a grievous sin for any woman to commit. It does not show the w
ife's submission to the husband, and is not conducive to love and happy marriage
.
Divorce:
There are others who think, they can desert their husbands at any time they like
, and take up new husbands. Some divorce their husbands and go to stay in where
they call "convenient homes." And you foolish woman where do you want to go. Whe
re your husband stays is your town and your home.
It is your heaven. From the day your parents surrendered you to a man in marriag
e, your parents and relations have no right over you; but your husband has every
right over you.
Give Him Food:
Women should know, God uses their husbands to test whether they can serve Him: g
ive him food and cloth; because something done by the wife to the husband is som
ething done to Christ. You should be like a loving child to your husband.
A Woman's Business Is Husband's:
Nothing else should concern a wife than her husband. A woman has no other busine
ss than her husband. To be a judge is nothing to her. To be a queen is nothing t
o her. The glory of a woman is her husband. He is her sole business.
If your husband is not asleep, you should not sleep. It is your duty to watch wi
th him. When necessary you should watch over him. When your husband is ill, you
are ill with him. His health is your health. And as the Church submits unto Chri
st, so all women are supposed to submit to their husbands. Any woman who refuses
to do this has direct punishment from God.
GOLDEN TEXT: 1st PETER Chapter 3 verse 8
"Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as breth
ren, be pitiful, be courteous."
The love we have for our wives should be full of humility and sympathy and peace
. These qualities should mark our conversations and actions towards them. Your j
oy and sorrows should be shared in the Spirit of love and oneness.
Your parents in-laws are your parents also. A husband should not do anything wit
hout seeking the mutual consent of his wife. Christ cannot dwell where there is
a division. But where both couples are united and surrender themselves to the wi
ll of God, Christ is their bridegroom and is ready to provide their temporal and
Spiritual needs. And they are merely brother and sister. That is why we say, in
the strict sense of the word no man should be called a husband. Christ alone is
a husband, while husband and wife are Brother and Sister.
Happy Home:
Therefore there must be Christ in every happy home. There must be singleness of
mind, compassion, love and pity between husband and wife. Any person who cannot
take care of his house cannot take care of the house of God. Whoever prays for a
successful marriage life, happy home, children of promise, should take this gos
pel as the only condition.
Those who have ears to hear let them hear, may the Lord bless the preaching of H
is holy word. Amen.
THANK YOU FATHER.