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44 Postal Regn. No.AP/KD-21/2015-2017

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ISSN 0979-9789
Relieves stress and
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Rishi Pharma, 40 Industrial Estate, SAMALKOT, EG Dt 533440

8500555365 www.payumoney.com/store/buy/rishiayurved

44 AP/KD-21/2015-2017
Postal Regn. No.AP/KD-21/2015-2017 d|+sT 2017
ABHISARIKA . RNI Regn.# 5908/61 Date of Publication: 19th of every month Date ooff Posting: 20th/21st ooff eevery
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ISSN 0979-9789

Relieves stress and

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8500555365 www.payumoney.com/store/buy/rishiayurved

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M.S. (Sexuality), P.G.D.C.P., Dip in A.V.R.., C.A.F.E., Ph: 0891-6595225,
Fellow, Council of Sex Education & Parenthood International
Cell: 93928 44435
HOLY CROSS Ki Z^~Q, NH-5 ~_, e-mail:
` QA"H, qY@O-530 026 doctorpilla@yahoo.com
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PQ 2017 38 68 = O=`~ K~}

 YOUR SEX QUESTIONS ANSWERED
These apges are meant for addressing the sexual concerns and questions of
our English-speaking readers. Readers may direct their questions to
editor.abhisarika@gmail.com or submit them through www.abhisarika.com
I am 27 year old healthy
male, originally from
Chennai, currently working
in the US. Unfortunately I
have same-sex attractions.
Infact I am only attracted to
men and am not at all
attracted to women. Given
our Indian society and
culture, I cant reveal this
fact to my friends and
family. Besides, even for
me personally I dont want
to lead a gay lifestyle. I
want to have a wife, family,
etc. I beleive that after I get
old, sex will become more
secondary and it is love and
companionship which will
be more important. My
understanding is there is
no such "cure" for homo-
sexuality.
What I want to know is,
if there is any Indian herbs/
pills and/or techniques that
I can employ to get an
erection when I am with a
girl even though I am not
aroused. I really feel that if
I can get an erection by
taking a pill or employing
some technique without
being actually aroused, I
can fulfil my obligations as
a husband and at the same
time live happily.
PQ 2017
I believe I am inherently
gay. But I want to sort of
"fake" attraction to a
woman and perform in bed.
Please help me. Thanks.
A: Thank you for sharing
your concern with us. First
of all let me assure you that
there indeed is a solution for
your problem, although not
with herbal medicines / pills
(no drug will ever change
our orientations).
Let me answer your mail
point-wise.
...Unfortunately I have
same-sex attractions. In fact I
am only attracted to men and
am not at all attracted to
women.
Its not unfortunate to
have same sex attractions.
The current understanding
and belief of sex-scientists is
that people have different
orientations towards sex and
same-sex orientation is one
form, the second largest
majority in the world.
However, if you are not
comfortable with your
current orientation and wish
to change to another kind of
orientation thats up to you
and IT IS POSSIBLE.
39
However, we or no one
else can change you. Its you
who should bring about that
desired change and we will
help you in doing that.
Thats possible only when
you have a strong desire,
motivation, determination
and persistent effort for
change.
I want to have a wife,
family, etc.
I take this, and your mail
as a whole, as a sign of your
strong inclination to
changing towards hetero-
sexuality.
However your next
sentence puts me in doubt
I believe that after I get old,
sex will become more secondary
and it is love and companion-
ship which will be more
important. I want to know if
THIS is your only motive
behind wanting to develop
attraction towards women.
If this is another reason in
addition to your general
desire to change orientation,
then you have better chances
of making a turn-around.
Why I am dwelling on these
points is that for any major
changes to take place in your
personality, you need to
68 = O=`~ K~}
have a very strong moti-
vation.
Okay, presuming you
have the necessary
ingredients for the proposed
change, you have to start on
a long journey towards
reorienting yourself. We (the
therapists, whoever you
approach) will help you
achieve this.
Its like a left-hander
trying to become a right
hander or vice versa. You
will come across hurdles
get feelings of frustration
may feel like giving up
but, my friend, perseverance
pays. It does. People before
you have transformed
themselves this way. You
will, too.
if there is any Indian
herbs/pills and/or techniques
that I can employ to get an
erection when I am with a girl
even though I am not aroused.
I really feel that (this
way)I can fulfil my
obligations as a husband and at
the same time live happily.
I am afraid I must
disagree with you. Indeed
there are pills like sildenafil
citrate, tadalafil, and
vardenafil to be taken orally;
and drugs like papavarine,
phentolamine, and prosta-
glandin e1 to be injected into
penis every time you want
have sex indeed they all
produce erections despite
not having sexual desire
you may be able to perform
intercourse but certainly
PQ 2017
not to your happiness or
satisfaction as you hoped for
very likely youll find it
mechanical, disappointing,
or even revulsive...!
I want to sort of "fake"
attraction to a woman and
perform in bed.
This can be disastrous,
and can ruin your sexual
life.
Therefore the solution is
to approach a sex therapist
experienced in handling
therapy for reorientation of
sexual preferences.
In my practice the
majority of my clients with
your problem have had the
origins of the problem in
some kind of same sex play
/ experience during their
adolescent years which was
usually their first sex
experience.
Same-sex exploration
happens to millions of
young boys, as this is a
normal part of the
psychosexual development
oH =O^ brings about change in your
$+~O,
~u ~ O, <QiH suggestions are given to you
^O` O, "II H after you are taken into
K^=@O q q behavior therapy.
^O` rq`xH K Therefore please appro-
[#O HeyO k. ach a certified sex therapist
40
of the male. A vast majority
of them soon pass through
that stage and develop
heterosexual interests, while
some cling on to their same-
sex interests accidentally
aroused during adolescence.
If misconceptions add
fuel to this, they come to
believe that they have
something inherently
homosexual or feminine
about them that caused their
same-sex attractions.
Initially they pursue it
further due to the upsurge
of hormones and emotions
typical of youth, but later, as
they grow up, they start to
regret it, develop intra-
psychic conflict, and seek
ways and means to change.
This is a typical situation
that I come across, although
not the only cause for same-
sex attractions. (Those who
are comfortable with their
homosexual feelings seldom
see a sex counselor).
If what I narrated above
holds good for you to a large
extent, you are a candidate
for therapy that gradually
orientation.
Hypnotherapy (in which
trance) also strengthens the
(visit www.aasect.org) near
you whose expertise
68 = O=`~ K~}
 includes cognitive-behavior to know why i have missed.
therapy and attend sessions Please write back because I
regularly. In a few weeks I am very nervous. Thank
expect you will find You.
remarkable change in the
A: Occasionally a period
situation.
HxeOQ O@~ I hasten to add a word of
caution. The therapy is slow
may miss for reasons
beyond our comprehension.
Stress and anxiety,
and requires patience and
O`#O x"~, perseverance. No drugs can
fluctuations in hormone
balance, change in place
=, O^ L#"~... bring about changes in (shifting from home to
D kQ= = Oz orientation. hostel), change in dietary
habits etc. are implicated.
OkOz `Q , Even after completion of
K#, HxeOQ O^=K. the therapy, you may be left
with some same-sex
As to your most worrying
question - rubbing the penis
^~^ attraction that pops up once against vaginal orifice CAN
N \. H$+=Ki a while throughout your cause pregnancy but VERY
JaiH HxeOQ O@~, life-span, but that is okay RARELY.
\ 79, Q Hs ~_, and you should not be upset
The reason is that the pre-
J=OfQ~ `@, Z~Q_, about it.
cum contains a few
^~^. : 98482 37811 I hope this answers your spermatozoa and in highly
[y` query. fertile couples these are
_II l. ^#O[, JaiH HxH, Rubbing causes capable of penetrating into
~"|*~, #: 9440152567 the vagina, the uterus and
pregnancy? the tubes and fertilize the
"\e Please help me and write egg, if one is waiting there.
_II l. ~[~`H~, =} HxH, me back with an answer to
Z.a.S. ==Y =^, HsO#Q~ All this may happen if
my question. Well, my
l, : 94401 39670 boyfriend and I have never
the sexual activity took place
qY@O really had sex but i have
around the day of ovulation
(egg release). The odds for
_II ^~~=, JaiH HxH, missed my period twice all these factors to
Holy Cross Ki Z^~Q, NH-5 ~_, now and I don't know what synchronize are few, but no
` QA"H, qY@O-530 026. to think of this.
: 93928 44435 one can predict. That is why
From what I know of, he safer sex practices are
=O hasn't ejaculated by my repeatedly advocated.
P~^ ~` _. J <~} vagina. I am so worried that I expect that your period
~O. <O. 27, 1 ~, a__ K #O.60, _. I am pregnant even though will show very soon.
l.ZO. ~_, J^ OH =^, =s, there is a very slim chance Meanwhile, buy a do-it-
=O 18 9967784025, 02224903945 I am. yourself pregnancy kit, test
=~~O Can you please tell me if your urine sample for
_. J"i ^ 9704343849 him rubbing his penis by pregnancy and hopefully,
my vagina but not sigh with a relief.
x*=^ ejaculating at all would
Pulling out doesn't help
_. q[~ 9290445540 cause me to become
pregnant. Also, i would like i'm 18 and recently, 5

PQ 2017 41 68 = O=`~ K~}

 active sex life and don't
i+~ heQ P~kH always use protection, but
~~ Q` P~ he normally pulls out. so
are my chances of being
A@ ~_O, pregnant really big? should
i get tested now or wait a
KO_,
few days and see if i start?
z# =< <~=_O thanks!
x"iOz A` ~Q^, #|_\xH Since you had
^^O KOk. unprotected sex 5 days
before your periods are due
P~^O ^"# $OQ~[, he, - and since your menstrual
"kx, [=, P=H, u "II cycle is regular and
predictable - it is less likely
=<``` `Hqkx that you become pregnant
O^HOQ `~K|_Ok. from this sexual encounter.
About a week before the
100 ml " ~.100 =`"! 3 due date is considered 'safe'.
\ ~.270. Hi~ J^#O.
Yet, to rest assured, you

A@ Z=Q ~e`Ok? x"~} Z? may get tested now. Most

A@ T_=_O Z=iH< K PO^#, ^ HeyOk.
=Oz `#< ~H=_O` @ =iHx *Q` fH"e.
1. PO^# iy` A@ ~_O ~Q`Ok. H#H A`
~_O `QO> PO^# `yOKH"e.
2. Hx = A` Z= ~e=_O [O. L^:
|+ =y =, Q~O ^iOKH. PO^# _HO_.
3. D kQ= # =iOKH"e:
q P~O `y#O` \< LO_@O J=~O.
~Hq = A` ~e`Ok.
lO, |\< O L< A` ~e`Ok.
(=iHx K# =K OzH..)
days before my period is
supposed to begin, my
fiance and i were having
sex. he ejaculated in me, it
was his first time. but now
i'm scared i could be
pregnant, it is now 2 days
kits are sensitive enough to
detect pregnancy by this
time. The cramps dont
predict pregnancy.
Regarding the other point
you mentioned - "he
normally pulls out" - this is
not totally safe, because his
pre-coital secretions (pre-
cum) may contain a few
sperms; secondly, occasion-
ally he may involuntarily
ejaculate even before he
could fully withdraw the
penis.
It's much better if you
could use Today vaginal
suppositories (tablet-like
things), or other barrier
before my period is methods, every time you
suposed to begin, but no participate in intercourse.
sign of it. i've had cramps You have to insert one tablet
for about a week, this never deep into your vagina, for
happens before my period. every act of coitus.
i normally don't cramp
until i start. we have a very

Editor, Printer & Publisher: Dr. DVR Poosha, 40, Industrial Estate, Samalkot. Printed for him at 42
PQ 2017 42 Abhisarika Press, Samalkot 68 = O=`~ K~}
 CMYK

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very month

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pH 2017
sT. 15

Relieves stress and

ISSN 0979-9789
fatigue
Restores Energy

Rishi Pharma, 40 Industrial Estate, SAMALKOT, EG Dt 533440

8500555365 www.payumoney.com/store/buy/rishiayurved

44 Postal Regn. No.AP/KD-21/2015-2017

AP/KD-21/2015-2017
ABHISARIKA . RNI Regn.# 5908/61 Date of Publication: 19th of every month Date ooff Posting: 20th/21st ooff eevery
very month
ISSN 0979-9789

]w bs jTTs< T\T
yT 2017
sT. 15

Relieves stress and

fatigue
Restores Energy

Rishi Pharma, 40 Industrial Estate, SAMALKOT, EG Dt 533440

8500555365 www.payumoney.com/store/buy/rishiayurved

CMYK