Essay template: revised Jan 13, 2015

Tip: Just type the template verbatim at the beginning, and then fill in the blank with examples.

The argument, that [insert conclusion only] omits some important considerations that
need to be addressed to get a holistic view of the situation under consideration. The argument
fails to provide substantive evidence or sound reasoning to be able to prove or even support the
conclusion from the given premises. The major flaws in the argument include unstated
assumptions as well as the fact that the argument confused revenue with profit. The passage
below aims to elaborate on the flaws as well as provide potential remedies to resolve them.

First, the argument readily assumes that []. This is an unwarranted leap of faith which
needs additional evidence in order to hold. A possible situation that contradicts this assumption
could be that []. Another possibility might be []. Moreover, []... Hence, the conclusion is invalid
unless the argument provides additional evidence to validate this unstated assumption.
Second, the argument claims that []. This is again a weak and unsupported claim as the
argument does not take into account []. For instance, [] Additionally, in the case that []. The
argument would not hold as well. Hence, the argument fails to convince readers that [conclusion].

Lastly, the argument confused [] with []. What if? Another possibility might be
Moreover, if, then the argument would not hold either

To remedy the aforementioned flaws, the argument need to include evidences that
support each of those unstated assumptions as well as interpret the given information reasonably.
Had the argument [fix flaw 1], [fix flaw 2], and [fix flaw 3], the argument would have been much
more sound.

In short, the argument fails to mention several key factors, on the basis of which it could
be evaluated, and fails to reason logically from the given premises. The [flaw 1, 2, 3] render the
argument unconvincing. Had the argument included the remedies mentioned above, the
conclusion would have been much more reasonable.

myohmy wrote:
Hey guys-

I'm not hugely qualified to give GMAT advice (I'm not an instructor), but I took the GMAT twice
and got a 6.0 essay score both times, so I hope someone will find my essay templates/advice
useful.

Analysis of Argument
Paragraph 1
I always start begin with a broad statement about the issue at hand. For instance in an argument
essay about whether it was necessary to conserve energy, I would begin with:

Energy conservation has become a hot topic in the United States as of late. There are those who
debate climate change and those who affirm it, those who assert that humans are depleting the
world's natural resources, including fossil fuels, and those who believe that humans are barely
making a dent in consuming the resources the earth has to offer.

This sets up a fluid introduction to my essay, and by starting with an introductory sentence, I felt
I would set myself apart from the majority of other test takers who begin "I agree" or "I
disagree" -- remember, you want to distinguish yourself from other essay writers (in a good way)
right from the start.

I always continue by saying, "In the preceding statement, the author claims that (paraphrase of
the author's argument)." This shows that I understand the author's argument. I continue with my
disagreement (and, as has been often said, ALWAYS disagree with the author's reasoning, and I
pretty much always used the same thesis statement, something like:

Though his claim may well have merit, the author presents a poorly reasoned argument, based
on several questionable premises and assumptions, and based solely on the evidence the author
offers, we cannot accept his argument as valid.

I can use that statement for pretty much any argument essay I encounter. The beginning shows
that I see the issue as nuanced, rather than black and white, and I recognize that though the
author may have arrived at the correct answer, his reasoning is flawed. I also use "we" but I try
to avoid using "I". Take that as you will.

Paragraph 2
For me, paragraph two always attacks the premises of the author's argument. I usually jot down
a couple of premises on my board -- these are things that show up in the author's argument,
usually without any evidence provided. So 99% of the time, I attack the lack of evidence that the
author bases his premises on. I usually begin with some version of:

The primary issue with the author's reasoning lies in his unsubstantiated premises.

I like "primary" and "secondary" as transitional tools because they are more complex than "first"
and "second". Throughout the first paragraph, I show flaws in the author's premises by pointing
out his lack of evidentiary support (they pretty much always lack evidentiary support) and where
they are open to holes or alternate explanations. I usually have two or three, but one would be
fine if it it was strong. I generally end with something like:
The author's premises, the basis for his argument, lack any legitimate evidentiary support and
render his conclusion unacceptable.

Paragraph 3
In the third paragraph, I always attack the assumptions - again, I jot down a couple assumptions
on my notepad while reading the prompt. Generally, the issue with assumptions is that they need
to be clearly explicated - the author is asking the reader to make a jump with them, but the
reader may well veer off course if the author doesn't explicitly state his arguments. I usually
begin with some variation of:

In addition, the author makes several assumptions that remain unproven.

Again, I begin with a transitional phrase that the e-grader can pick up on. As with the premises, I
spend this paragraph attacking a couple of the author's assumptions. The easiest way to do this
is to find an alternate explanation -- ie, what if the assumption wasn't true? I usually have two or
three, again. My assumption paragraph ends with something like:

The author weakens his argument by making assumptions and failing to provide explication of
the links between X and Y he assumes exists.

Paragraph 4
Paragraph 4 is where I talk about how the author could strengthen his argument -- that is, I go
back to my claim that his argument could have some validity, but not as it stands. I usually begin
this paragraph with something like:

While the author does have several key issues in his argument's premises and assumptions, that
is not to say that the entire argument is without base.

Then I provide some concrete ways the author could strengthen his argument. The easiest way
to do this is to give examples of what kind of evidence the author could provide, and discuss how
he can fill the holes in his assumptions. I generally end with something like:

Though there are several issues with the author's reasoning at present, with research and
clarification, he could improve his argument significantly.

Paragraph 5
This is my conclusion paragraph. I pretty much always conclude with the same sentence:

In sum, the author's illogical argument is based on unsupported premises and unsubstantiated
assumptions that render his conclusion invalid.

I usually use "in sum" because it's considered better stylistically than "in conclusion" but signals
to the e-grader that you're at your conclusion. I usually add a couple sentences of fluff in
between and then I end with:
If the author truly hopes to change his readers' minds on the issue, he would have to largely
restructure his argument, fix the flaws in his logic, clearly explicate his assumptions, and provide
evidentiary support. Without these things, his poorly reasoned argument will likely convince few
people.

...And that's pretty much it.

So the cliff notes:

P1- Intro with generic thesis statement that works for 99.9% of argument essays.

P2 - Attack the premises of the argument.

P3 - Attack the assumptions of the argument.

P4 - Discuss what type of evidence or reasoning would strengthen the argument.

P5 - Conclusion.

Hope that helps someone out there and good luck on your essays!

Guide to Perfect 6.0 AWA GMAT Score

Related AWA Resources:

List of all AWA topics from GMAC

Sample replies to all Essays
Overview of GMAT Write, the official essay grading tool

I took the GMAT twice and scored 6.0 each time. I did put a lot of time in it the first
time....too much actually. Being a non-native speaker and having not written a damn essay (of
any kind) in many many years, I was very scared of the AWA. So, I went through every guide
that I could find and wrote nearly 25-30 essays. Even had a friend grade them for
me.....Pathetic, huh?

Anyway, for my second time, I just looked over my templates I created and wrote one of each
the day before test just to refresh my memory on faster typing without making too many
typos......

So, here it is....Enjoy, and please do not blame me if the 6.0 percentile goes down to 80
soon
AWA GUIDE
by Chineseburned

1. General Structure

Intro - Restate argument, point out flaws or state intention to discuss them below
1st Para - First,...
2nd Para - Second/In addition,...
3rd Para - Third/Finally,...
Conclusion - The argument is flawed/weak/unconvincing because of the above
-mentioned...Ultimately, the argument can be strengthened if/by...

2. Structural Word (should be all over the essays)

1. Supporting examples - for example, to illustrate, for instance, because,

specifically
2. Additional support - furthermore, in addition, similarly, just as, also, as a
result, moreover
3. Importance - surely, truly, undoubtedly, clearly, in fact, most importantly
4. Contrast - on the contrary, yet, despite, rather, instead, however, although,
while
5. Decide against - one cannot deny that, it could be argued that, granted,
admittedly
6. Ying-yang - on the one hand/on the other hand
7. Concluding - therefore, in summary, consequently, hence, in conclusion,
ultimately, in closing

3. Templates

Intro:
The argument claims that ....(restate)
Stated in this way the argument:
a) manipulates facts and conveys a distorted view of the situation
b) reveals examples of leap of faith, poor reasoning and ill-defined terminology
c) fails to mention several key factors, on the basis of which it could be evaluated
The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence.
Hence, the argument is weak/unconvincing and has several flaws.

1st Para:
First, the argument readily assumes that......
This statement is a stretch....
For example,...
Clearly,...
The argument could have been much clearer if it explicitly stated that...
2nd Para:
Second, the argument claims that....
This is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument does not demonstrate any
correlation between....and...
To illustrate,...
While,...
However,....indeed....
In fact, it is not at all clear...rather....
If the argument had provided evidence that.....then the argument would have been a lot more
convincing.

3rd Para:
Finally,...
(pose some questions for the argument).....Without convincing answers to these questions, one
is left with the impression that the claim is more of a wishful thinking rather than substantive
evidence.

Conclusion:
In conclusion, the argument is flawed for the above-mentioned reasons and is therefore
unconvincing. It could be considerably strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the
relevant facts....
In order to assess the merits of a certain situation/decision, it is essential to have full
knowledge of all contributing factors. In this particular case....
Without this information, the argument remains unsubstantiated and open to debate.

4. Going from the templates to full-fledged essays

ESSAY QUESTION:
The following appeared in the editorial section of a national news magazine:[/b]

"The rating system for electronic games is similar to the movie rating system in that
it provides consumers with a quick reference so that they can determine if the
subject matter and contents are appropriate. This electronic game rating system is
not working because it is self regulated and the fines for violating the rating system
are nominal. As a result an independent body should oversee the game industry and
companies that knowingly violate the rating system should be prohibited from
releasing a game for two years."

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. Point out flaws in the argument's
logic and analyze the argument's underlying assumptions. In addition, evaluate how
supporting evidence is used and what evidence might counter the argument's
conclusion. You may also discuss what additional evidence could be used to
strengthen the argument or what changes would make the argument more logically
sound.

YOUR RESPONSE:
Quote:
The argument claims that the electronic games rating system, although similar to the movie
rating system, is not working because it is self regulated and violation fines are nominal,
Hence, the gaming rating system should be overseen by an independent body. Stated in this
way the argument fails to mention several key factors, on the basis of which it could be
evaluated. The conclusion relies on assumptions, for which there is no clear evidence.
Therefore, the argument is rather weak, unconvincing, and has several flaws.

First, the argument readily assumes that because the electronic game rating system is self
regulated, it is not working well. This statement is a stretch and not substantiated in any way.
There are numerous examples in other areas of business or commerce, where the entities are
self regulated and rather successful. For instance, FIA, the Formula1 racing organization is self
regulated. Yet, the sport is very popular and successful, drawing millions of spectators around
the world each year. Tickets are rather expensive, races are shown on pay-per-view, and
nearly all drivers are paid very well. Another example is the paralleled movie rating system
that the argument mentions. The author fails to clarify whether it is working well, but it is
clear that the movie rating system is pretty well received by people, who often base their
decisions to go see a movie with kids or not on the movie rating. It has never been a case when
someone would feel cheated by the movie rating and express disappointment afterwards. Since
the movie rating system is also self regulated, it follows that this regulatory method is working
pretty well and it is not obvious how it can be the reason for the poor electronic game rating
system. The argument would have been much clearer if it explicitly gave examples of how the
self regulatory system led to bad ratings and customer dissatisfaction.

Second, the argument claims that any violation fees for bad electronic game ratings are
nominal. It thus suggests that this is yet another reason for the rating system not working. This
is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument does not demonstrate any
correlation between the monetary amount of the fines and the quality of the electronic game
rating system. In fact, the argument does not even draw a parallel with the mentioned movie
rating system and its violation fines. If any such correlation had been shown for the movie
rating system, which supposedly works well, then the author would have sounded a bit more
convincing. In addition, if the argument provided evidence that low violation fines lead to
electronic game manufacturers to ignore any regulations with respect to the game rating
system, the argument could have been strengthened even further.

Finally, the argument concludes that an independent body should oversee the game industry
and companies that violate the rating system, should be punished. From this statement again,
it is not at all clear how an independent regulatory body can do a better job than a self
regulated one. Without supporting evidence and examples from other businesses where
independent regulatory bodies have done a great job, one is left with the impression that the
claim is more of a wishful thinking rather than substantive evidence. As a result, this
conclusion has no legs to stand on.

In summary, the argument is flawed and therefore unconvincing. It could be considerably

strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the relevant facts. In order to assess the
merits of a certain situation, it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.

5. Final tips

During the tutorial type in a few sentences in the mock essay window to get
used to the keyboard.
Again during the tutorial, jot down on your notebook the basic structure of
your essays or the opening sentences in case you get too nervous and forget
them when the clock starts ticking.
Write as much as you can. Try to write at least 500 words per essay.
Always have the e-rater in mind as your potential reviewer. Remember that
the human rater will make every effort to grade just like the e-rater. In that
sense, keep your structure and volume in mind over actual quality/content.
Be careful of spelling mistakes. Double check words that you normally know
you misspell (e.g. exercise). Try to finish 2-3 minutes before time is up so you
can slowly re-read your essay for the purposes of spell checking. Do not
reorganize/delete sentences/paragraphs with less than 2 min left.
No matter how great you thought your essays went, try to stay humble and
focused - remember this was just a warm-up and the real stuff hasn't started yet!

Good luck!
_________________

Chinese Democracy is misunderstood...at your nearest BestBuy.

Best AWA guide here: how-to-get-6-0-awa-my-guide-64327.html

Last edited by carcass on 26 Aug 2014, 11:26, edited 9 times in total.

Added the template as image

The following AWA essay template (view as PDF or text), when accompanied
by proper grammar, good diction, and solid argument analysis, has produced
many 6.0 AWA scores.

AWA Template Adobe Acrobat Format (.pdf)

o Analysis of An Issue Template (Plain Text View)

o Analysis of An Argument Template (Plain Text View)

AWA Issue Analysis - Example Essay Using Template (.pdf)

AWA Argument Analysis - Example Essay Using Template (.pdf)

Template - Analysis of an Argument

Please see the sample essay in order to better understand how to apply this
template.

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Dissection of argument (i.e., name the parts of the argument: premises,

conclusions, assumptions)

Thesis statement: the argument that ... is flawed because (paragraph 2

overview) and (paragraph 3 overview)

Paragraph 2 - First Point (i.e., First Reason Argument is Flawed)

Transition Phrase: First,

Statement of Point

Example

Relate the Example

Paragraph 3 - Second Point (i.e., Second Reason Argument is Flawed)

Transition Phrase: Second,

Statement of Point
Example

Relate the Example

Paragraph 4 - How to Fix Argument

Transition Phrase: Moreover,

How to Fix Argument

Paragraph 5 - Conclusion

Transition Phrase: In conclusion,

Recap of Thesis Statement

Summary of Outline

Template - Analysis of an Issue

Please see the sample essay in order to better understand how to apply this
template.

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Acknowledge the complexity of the issue

Thesis statement: I agree/disagree with the statement that ... because

(paragraph 2 overview) and (paragraph 3 overview)

Paragraph 2 - First Point

Transition Phrase: First,

Statement of Point

Example

Relate the Example

Paragraph 3 - Second Point

Transition Phrase: Second,

Statement of Point

Example

Relate the Example

Paragraph 4 - Rejection of Counter-Point

Transition Phrase/Statement of Counter Point: On the other hand, some may

argue that...

Rebuttal of Counter Point

Example Supporting Rebuttal

Relate the Example

Paragraph 5 - Conclusion

Transition Phrase: In conclusion,

Recap of Thesis
Statementhttp://www.platinumgmat.com/about_gmat/awa_sample_essay_a
rgument.pdf

http://www.platinumgmat.com/about_gmat/awa_essay_template#text-issue

Summary of Outline

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2009 PlatinumPrep, LLC.

GMAT AWA Sample Essay

Analysis of An Argument

"The recent surge in violence in the southern part of the city is a result of a shortage of police
officers and an absence of leadership on the part of the city council. In order to rectify the
burgeoning growth of crime that threatens the community, the city council must address this
issue seriously. Instead of spending time on peripheral issues such as education quality,
community vitality, and job opportunity, the city council must realize that the crime issue is
serious and double the police force, even if this action requires budget cuts from other city
programs."

In the argument above, the author concludes that the city council is not doing its job well and
needs to focus on expanding significantly the police force in order to combat recent growth in
the level of crime. The premise of the argument is that crime is expanding while the city council
focuses on ostensibly unrelated matters such as education reform. However, the argument is
flawed because it falsely assumes that the city councils efforts to improve quality of life are
entirely unrelated to levels of violence and it assumes that the crime problem can be solved by
merely increasing the police force.

First, the argument wrongly assumes that issues of educational opportunity, community vitality,
and job availability have no bearing on crime. However, the author fails to support this
assumption. It is entirely possible that the crime level spiked due to a recent and sizeable layoff
at a major nearby factory that pushed countless citizens out of work and onto the streets. With
individuals struggling to survive, it should come as no surprise that people are turning to crime.

Second, the reasoning in the editorial is flawed because it erroneously assumes that increasing
the police force will directly address the root of the crime problem and reduce the level of crime.
Yet, a landmark study published in early 2008 showed that increasing the size of a police force
beyond a certain point provides extremely small marginal returns in the reduction of crime.
Given the fact that the local police force is already above this threshold, the editorials author
wrongly assumed that a doubling of the police force will materially decrease the crime rate.

Moreover, the argument could be improved by appealing to the citys history with fighting crime
and managing the size of its police force. In particular, approximately 25 years ago, the city
council faced a situation very similar to the one it faces today: a rising crime rate and growing
spending on community development. The city council decided to increase the size of its
afterschool programs budget by about 75% and this reduced crime dramatically. Faced with the
same situation today, the city council should follow the path it took 25 years ago.

In conclusion, the argument in the newspaper editorial is flawed because it assumes that
educational opportunity, job availability, and community vitality are not related to the level of
crime a community experiences. Moreover, the argument wrongly concludes that an increase in
the police force will address the root issue behind the crime, which the argument assumes is an
inadequate number of police officers.

Recipes for Success

Because the AWA does not expect you to be an expert in the
subject matter being discussed and does not expect you to take
any particular viewpoint, the keys to owning the AWA are to
write in standard and proper American English and to make sure
you structure your essay in a clear, logical, and easy-to-follow
way. Your review of grammar rules for the Verbal multiple choice
section will help you with the first part, so that means that
mastering the AWA really means practicing organization.

The easiest way to effectively organize your AWA is to start with

an outline to organize your thoughts and make sure you stay on
topic for the entirety of your essay. Even if you are an extremely
strong writer, the relatively short period of time you have to write
your piece means that you probably will not have time to
backtrack or figure out your organization on the fly. You need to
map out your entire argument before anything else, then stick to
that map, to make sure you cover everything you need to cover.

Given that condition, the best strategy is to simply memorize a

template and practice outlining arguments using that template.
Though there are many different ways to organize your piece,
here is one possible template we recommend:

Paragraph 1 Introduction
-Summarize the argument given in the prompt
-Thesis statement that explains the flaw in the logic of the
prompt
-Summarize your argument in one sentence
-2 3 sentences long
Paragraph 2 First Flaw in the Prompts Logic
-Begin with words such as To begin with, Firstly, etc.
-Explain one reason why the prompts logic or reasoning is faulty
-Do not talk about anything but the flaw you are focusing on
-4 6 sentences long

Paragraph 3 Second Flaw in the Prompts Logic

-Begin with words such as In addition, Secondly, etc
-Present a different reason why the prompts reasoning is flawed
-Do not talk about anything but the second flaw
-4 6 sentences long

Paragraph 4 Alternative Viewpoint

-Begin with words such as As an alternative, However, etc.
-Present your stance on the issue
-Show how your stance clearly addresses the flaws
-Do not talk about anything but the alternate viewpoint
-4 6 sentences long

Paragraph 5 Conclusion
-Begin with words such as In short, In summation, etc.
-Briefly summarize the flaws and your alternative
-2 3 sentences long

As you can see, this template uses a fairly basic five-paragraph

essay format that is probably very similar to what you might
have used on essays in high school. If that seems boring or
uncreative to you, thats because it is, but remember: your
objective on the AWA isnt to be the next Shakespeare. Your
objective is to write a concise, clear, well-organized essay, and
although using this (or any) template cannot guarantee you a
high score, it can help simplify your thought process and make
organization a snap.

Now that weve got a template in our toolbox, lets take a look at
a real AWA prompt and outline a possible response using our
template above. Heres the prompt:

Most companies would agree that as the risk of physical injury

occurring on the job increases, the wages paid to employees
should also increase. Hence it makes financial sense for
employers to make the workplace safer: they could thus reduce
their payroll expenses and save money.
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your
discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of
evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to
consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking
and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might
weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of
evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes
in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if
anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.
We now know were discussing how the risk of injury should
affect pay. From the outset, all you should really pay attention to
are the words in the quotation marks; the text below that are
simply standardized instructions meant to help you along and
will always read exactly like that. You may disagree with my
reasoning in the example below, but remember, the AWA does
not score you on content. In addition, youll note that I leave out
a lot of the key transition words we discussed above: thats
because Im just working with an outline right now, Im not
writing the actual essay yet.

Watch how I apply the template:

Paragraph 1 Introduction
-The prompt states that controlling workplace risk means
controlling cost
-This assumes that wages can be lowered, and that it is actually
possible to make every workplace safer
-Other factors, such as industry fixed costs and best practices,
can drive costs up even in very safe workplaces.

Paragraph 2 First Flaw in the Prompts Logic

-Companies with dangerous workplaces such as construction
sites and factories frequently must deal with labor unions to set
wages
-Even if the company makes the workplace safer, it may be under
a contractual obligation not to reduce wages
-The company or industry may also be subject to laws that
dictate how and how much the employees are paid
-Just making the workplace safer does not necessarily mean a
company can lower wages.

Paragraph 3 Second Flaw in the Prompts Logic

Increased safety may cost more than any possible payroll
savings
-Safety is desirable for other reasons, but the argument
specifically mentions costs
savings and these may not be achievable
Some safety measures may cost a lot for very little increase in
safety

Example: Construction workers are already required to use

safety equipment such as hard hats. Reducing the risk of
construction site accidents might require expensive changes to
scheduling, manpower and workflow and might not produce
much increase in safety.

Example: Medical personnel already use precautions such as

double-gloving and wearing masks to avoid contact with
contaminated blood. Added stringencies such as requiring
medical workers to wear bunny suits might reduce risks only
slightly, since needles and scalpels could still poke through, but
would cost a lot.

Paragraph 4 Alternative Viewpoint

-Safe workplaces can reward companies outside of wage savings
-Example: Fewer accidents means fewer work stoppages and
fewer
Workmans Comp claims
-Workers who feel safe and valued may also be more productive
-A company can make its workplace safe for its workers and reap
hard benefits aside from just wage savings
-A company should not strictly focus on wages when making its
safety decisions
Paragraph 5 Conclusion
-Making a work place safer may not necessarily affect
wages, however it can
benefit a company in other ways

As you can see, each paragraph has a clear, well-defined purpose,

and the main point is always very easy to point out. In addition,
as soon as I prove my point in each paragraph, I quickly move
onto the next. In addition, all of the examples in my template are
very specific and easy to follow, meaning I will be able to write
my essay very quickly once Im done. Although your specific
viewpoint and content will vary, using an outline template is a
quick way to help you organize your thoughts and get started.

***

(c) 2012, Test Prep New York

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individualized, rigorous test preparation combined with effective
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More Testing Advice from our blog
3. Argument:
The following appeared in a memorandum from the business department of the Apogee
Company:

When the Apogee Company had all its operations in one location, it was more profitable than it
is today.
Therefore, the Apogee Company should close down its field offices and conduct all its operations
from a single location. Such centralization would improve profitability by cutting costs and helping
the company maintain better supervision of all employees.

Analysis:

Many companies have their offices in several locations. Some companies feel that having a
centralized office is better others feel that individual offices are better, some say this can lead to
increase in cost others feel the opposite and say that its better for managing things. In the
preceding statement, the author claims that when Apogee Company had all its operations in one
location, it was more profitable than it is today. Though this claim may well have merit, the
author presents a poorly reasoned argument, based on several questionable premises and
assumptions, and based solely on the evidence the author offers; we cannot accept his argument
as valid.

The primary issue in authors reasoning lies in his unsubstantiated premises. According to the
author, when Apogee Company had all its operations in one location there was better
profitability, but it is not necessary that the profitability has decreased because of having offices
in various locations, there can be other reasons for eg: the market is not stable and due to which
there had been a decrease in sales of the companys product or the no. of competitors may have
increased as compared to before etc. The authors premises, the basis for his argument, lack any
legitimate evidentiary support and render his conclusion unacceptable.

In addition, the author makes several assumptions that remain unproven. The closing down of
field offices and conducting all the companies operation from one location will increase the profits
like before, which is not necessary to happen as the scenario may have changed. Centralization
may lead to decrease in profitability then before, but it is not definite to happen, the company
may increase its costs by centralization as accumulating all in one place can lead to some
expenses, for eg: new offices, similar facilities, etc. Also, supervision of all employees may
become difficult as all would be accumulated at one place and there can be problem in
coordination between the people working together before. The author weakens his argument by
failing to provide explication of the links between centralization and profitability he assumes
exists.
 While the author does have some key issues in his premises and assumptions that is not to say
that the entire argument is without base. The author can provide more examples to support his
argument, he can concentrate on increasing sales rather than on centralization and even if he
thinks centralization can improve profitability then he should mention the reason for the same for
eg: he can state that since the market is not supporting currently and business is reducing
simultaneously and because of which we need to merge offices etc. Though there are several
issues with the authors reasoning at present, with research and clarification he could improve his
argument significantly.

In sum, the authors illogical argument is based on unsupported premises and unsubstantiated
assumptions that render his conclusion invalid. If the author truly hopes to change his readers
mind on the issue, he would have to largely restructure his argument, fix the flaws in his logic,
clearly explicate his assumptions, and provide evidentiary support. Without these things, his
poorly reasoned argument will likely convince few people.

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Quote
Hello Architj,

My suggestions from your previous response were to clear up your writing and pick strong
 examples to support your points.

Writing: There are still plenty of long sentences (look at your intro again for examples). Shorter,
more direct sentences will help engage the reader. Make sure you discuss the "author's"
reasoning, not "authors" reasoning. Similarly, use "company's" operation instead of "companies"
operation. On the other hand, "issue's" should be "issues." Use contractions mostly to show
possession (the author's argument, the company's policies), but don't use them to make a word
plural ("issue's" is incorrect; you mean "issues").

Structure: Your intro is much longer now, but I don't think you need to include so many details
right away. It took a few sentences before you reached the author's argument; make sure your
summary of the author's argument is clear right away. I think that the template helped you
structure your essay, because the paragraphs seemed more connected than in your previous
response. The conclusion doesn't have anything to do with this prompt: it is all right to use a
template, but you can't have a generic conclusion. Even something as small as mentioning the
company's name or adding a few words about the main argument will help make your conclusion
feel original.

Arguments/Examples: Great job finding reasons why profitability may have changed that aren't
related to the company location. You did much better with finding examples and connecting them
to your argument.

Suggestions for Improvement: I know it's easy to use a generic conclusion, but that will lose you
points on the AWA! Make sure your conclusion is tailored to the prompt. Keep trying to cut down
your long sentences and to make them concise. I'd put this essay in the 4-4.5 range, but I think
that you can improve before test day.

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AWA -5.5/6; IR-8/8; 730 (Q50, V39) - Next Generation GMAT Wed Jun 06, 2012 4:51 pm

 Quote
Took the GMAT today, got a 730. I was expecting a 740 - missed by this much !
And yeah, folks - this is the Next Gen GMAT.

1.0 Preface :
I know that many people are gonna ask this question later on. (My buddies on this forum have
quite often asked this questions) -> Why did you take the GMAT immediately after the
format changed ?

Quote:
I just did not get any other suitable time for the exam

1.1 GMAT Scores :

Here is my result and unofficial score card :

AWA -> 5.5 -> 77%

IR -> 8 -> 94%
Maths -> 50 -> 92%
Verbal -> 39 -> 87%
Total -> 730 -> 96%

* During my Test preparation - I got 730 once but i got 97% as the percentile score. Dont know
why it is varied here.

1.2 Preparation Tips :

Please find below my methods for preparation. If you think it can help your preparation, you are
more than welcome to follow it.

Preperation for AWA :

http://gmatclub.com/forum/how-to-get-6-0-awa-my-guide-64327-140.html
End of story. The above template and word structuring were really helpful. I dont think I spent
more than 2 days on AWA preparation. I practiced 2 essays typing in MS word. Stick to the
template provided by ChineseBurned in the above link and you will be fine. Also, make sure you
use a lot of transition words and connecting words. Make sure your thought flow is clearly
supplemented by such words.

Preperation for IR :
IR was not one area where I had sufficient material; neither do i have enough knowledge to even
logically attack it. OG 13 provides a 6 month free access to their online portal hosting 50 IR
questions. These are the best. They are tough, stressful, irritating and just what you need to get
a taste of the original GMATish IR.
The most crucial factor about IR is to forget about numbers and understand the
synopsis/description/annotation about what this data means. Once you understand what values
each numbers/graph bars stand for - IR questions will demystify and will be a cake walk.
Sounds easy right ? This is where GMAT shows its true colors. One ca easily mistake the meaning
of a data while solving the question and land up at wrong calculation result. Oh yeah - GMAT will
make sure the wrong answer is present in the answer choices.
If you can - give the Online IR provided by OG13 a try - they are really really tough !

Preperation for Quant :

Preparation for Quant was very straightforward. Practice, Practice, Practice - coupled with -
Review, Review, Review. I don't remember the last time I looks at geometry formulas or statistic
concepts. Maybe it was 2 months ago. Anyways, my point is - Once you fully understand the
concepts tested by GMAT - All that is left to do is quality practice (Preferably Official Question -
GMATPrep, OG12, OG13, Math Supplement, mba.com questions). What you need to understand
is that GMAT only tests a finite set of concepts which are easy and quite basic. Get this over with
at the early stages of your preparation.

Preperation for Verbal :

Oh Boy, this was a nightmare for me. Especially the sentence correction part of it. There seems
to be many interlinked ways in which a grammatically correct answer can sound weird. Don't
worry - a technique called Detailed Documentation worked for me. It is similar to Error log - but
something which i have made for myself. The details of this method are in the end.

Sentence Correction is a pain in the ass. But one thing which drastically improved my
performance is a simple technique. Whenever evaluating correct answers - make sure to look
into non-underlined portion of the question for tips. Most of the case, you will find critical clues
which will help you answer the question.

Reading Comprehension is an area which can drain you of energy and concentration. Most
important thing to do for this section is to stay focused and connect with the passage. Sounds
stupid - But trust me, it works ! You don't have to dream about dolphins for 5 min if the passage
is about dolphins. You just need to like dolphins - seriously, love them - I myself hate dolphin but
what choice do we have ?

Critical Reasoning is an area where you will definitely commit mistakes. Period. This is
inevitable. Keep 1 or 2 questions buffer in CR and consider them as goners. I don't mean to
suggest and outrageous thing such as leaving out a question or blindly guessing. But what is am
saying is something that many people forget to adapt to on a CR question. Once you find the
answer - Mark and move on. It is not a mere coincidence that many people who apply for
competitive exam choose correct answer but review the answer choices again and again and end
up choosing the wrong answer. This is exactly why I did not cross cut-off in IIT-JEE.

I am suggesting this from the bottom of my heart - with all the good will. This is applicable to
Verbal questions in general but mostly to RC & CR. Never re-review your answer choices once
you have correctly zoned in using elimination technique. It is waste of your time and energy.

1.3 G-Day and The Day before :

The Day before the GMAT - Do not read anything. Do not review anything. Do not take
practice test.
Strickly - No VERBAL ! You can do a little of maths - but only those easy kind of problems. (Only
if you are feeling too bored)
What i did was - Went to office but did little work, Listened to lots of music while at office, Went
to movie with friends after office and took my girlfriend for a great Italian dinner. (She was
actually more tensed than i was about my exam !)
If you can - visit the center. I knew where my center was - so did not do this activity.

G-Day(my slot was morning - 9:00 AM) - Have a heavy breakfast and tea/coffee/juice -
whatever suits you. Just don't get dehydrated. That is the last thing you want on a GMAT. I took
a red bull - now i know 1 was not enough. I should have taken some chocolate bars/energy
bars. Manhattan GMAT has a set of techniques to get you relaxed. Practice these - will be helpful
during Real Exam. Also - don't forget to ask the test administrator for Ear-Plugs. They work for
noise cancellation and are very effective.

Quote:
Detailed Documentation: Whenever I am done with a practice test - I open up spreadsheet
and enter all the errors I have committed. With details and answer three headers related to the
error:
Details on the Error, Reasons for the Error & To-Do Improvement.
In case anyone wants a template of this file, you can download it below:
(No copyrights applicable : Free document : Creative Commons of Penguinfoot)

Finally, Remember : You can practice 1001 questions, but if you don't review your errors - you
are not gonna make any progress.

Do let me know in case i can be of any help to my fellow community members. I have a month
before i start applying to colleges.
Attachments
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Please login or register as a user.

_________________
"Hakunamatata" - No Worries.
Alma Mater: Indian School of Business, Hyderabad
Like my Post ? You can thank me now!

Last edited by penguinfoot on Sun Jun 24, 2012 2:37 pm; edited 4 times in total

How to get 6.0 AWA....my guide [#permalink] 22 May 2008, 06:56

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Guide to Perfect 6.0 AWA GMAT Score
Related AWA Resources:

List of all AWA topics from GMAC

Sample replies to all Essays
Overview of GMAT Write, the official essay grading tool

I took the GMAT twice and scored 6.0 each time. I did put a lot of time in it the first
time....too much actually. Being a non-native speaker and having not written a damn essay (of
any kind) in many many years, I was very scared of the AWA. So, I went through every guide
that I could find and wrote nearly 25-30 essays. Even had a friend grade them for
me.....Pathetic, huh?

Anyway, for my second time, I just looked over my templates I created and wrote one of each
the day before test just to refresh my memory on faster typing without making too many
typos......

So, here it is....Enjoy, and please do not blame me if the 6.0 percentile goes down to 80
soon

AWA GUIDE
by Chineseburned

1. General Structure

Intro - Restate argument, point out flaws or state intention to discuss them below
1st Para - First,...
2nd Para - Second/In addition,...
3rd Para - Third/Finally,...
Conclusion - The argument is flawed/weak/unconvincing because of the above
-mentioned...Ultimately, the argument can be strengthened if/by...

2. Structural Word (should be all over the essays)

1. Supporting examples - for example, to illustrate, for instance, because,

specifically
2. Additional support - furthermore, in addition, similarly, just as, also, as a
result, moreover
3. Importance - surely, truly, undoubtedly, clearly, in fact, most importantly
4. Contrast - on the contrary, yet, despite, rather, instead, however, although,
while
5. Decide against - one cannot deny that, it could be argued that, granted,
admittedly
6. Ying-yang - on the one hand/on the other hand
7. Concluding - therefore, in summary, consequently, hence, in conclusion,
ultimately, in closing

3. Templates

Intro:
The argument claims that ....(restate)
Stated in this way the argument:
a) manipulates facts and conveys a distorted view of the situation
b) reveals examples of leap of faith, poor reasoning and ill-defined terminology
c) fails to mention several key factors, on the basis of which it could be evaluated
The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence.
Hence, the argument is weak/unconvincing and has several flaws.

1st Para:
First, the argument readily assumes that......
This statement is a stretch....
For example,...
Clearly,...
The argument could have been much clearer if it explicitly stated that...

2nd Para:
Second, the argument claims that....
This is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument does not demonstrate any
correlation between....and...
To illustrate,...
While,...
However,....indeed....
In fact, it is not at all clear...rather....
If the argument had provided evidence that.....then the argument would have been a lot more
convincing.

3rd Para:
Finally,...
(pose some questions for the argument).....Without convincing answers to these questions, one
is left with the impression that the claim is more of a wishful thinking rather than substantive
evidence.

Conclusion:
In conclusion, the argument is flawed for the above-mentioned reasons and is therefore
unconvincing. It could be considerably strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the
relevant facts....
In order to assess the merits of a certain situation/decision, it is essential to have full
knowledge of all contributing factors. In this particular case....
Without this information, the argument remains unsubstantiated and open to debate.
4. Going from the templates to full-fledged essays

ESSAY QUESTION:
The following appeared in the editorial section of a national news magazine:[/b]

"The rating system for electronic games is similar to the movie rating system in that
it provides consumers with a quick reference so that they can determine if the
subject matter and contents are appropriate. This electronic game rating system is
not working because it is self regulated and the fines for violating the rating system
are nominal. As a result an independent body should oversee the game industry and
companies that knowingly violate the rating system should be prohibited from
releasing a game for two years."

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. Point out flaws in the argument's
logic and analyze the argument's underlying assumptions. In addition, evaluate how
supporting evidence is used and what evidence might counter the argument's
conclusion. You may also discuss what additional evidence could be used to
strengthen the argument or what changes would make the argument more logically
sound.

YOUR RESPONSE:
Quote:
The argument claims that the electronic games rating system, although similar to the movie
rating system, is not working because it is self regulated and violation fines are nominal,
Hence, the gaming rating system should be overseen by an independent body. Stated in this
way the argument fails to mention several key factors, on the basis of which it could be
evaluated. The conclusion relies on assumptions, for which there is no clear evidence.
Therefore, the argument is rather weak, unconvincing, and has several flaws.

First, the argument readily assumes that because the electronic game rating system is self
regulated, it is not working well. This statement is a stretch and not substantiated in any way.
There are numerous examples in other areas of business or commerce, where the entities are
self regulated and rather successful. For instance, FIA, the Formula1 racing organization is self
regulated. Yet, the sport is very popular and successful, drawing millions of spectators around
the world each year. Tickets are rather expensive, races are shown on pay-per-view, and
nearly all drivers are paid very well. Another example is the paralleled movie rating system
that the argument mentions. The author fails to clarify whether it is working well, but it is
clear that the movie rating system is pretty well received by people, who often base their
decisions to go see a movie with kids or not on the movie rating. It has never been a case when
someone would feel cheated by the movie rating and express disappointment afterwards. Since
the movie rating system is also self regulated, it follows that this regulatory method is working
pretty well and it is not obvious how it can be the reason for the poor electronic game rating
system. The argument would have been much clearer if it explicitly gave examples of how the
self regulatory system led to bad ratings and customer dissatisfaction.

Second, the argument claims that any violation fees for bad electronic game ratings are
nominal. It thus suggests that this is yet another reason for the rating system not working. This
is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument does not demonstrate any
correlation between the monetary amount of the fines and the quality of the electronic game
rating system. In fact, the argument does not even draw a parallel with the mentioned movie
rating system and its violation fines. If any such correlation had been shown for the movie
rating system, which supposedly works well, then the author would have sounded a bit more
convincing. In addition, if the argument provided evidence that low violation fines lead to
electronic game manufacturers to ignore any regulations with respect to the game rating
system, the argument could have been strengthened even further.

Finally, the argument concludes that an independent body should oversee the game industry
and companies that violate the rating system, should be punished. From this statement again,
it is not at all clear how an independent regulatory body can do a better job than a self
regulated one. Without supporting evidence and examples from other businesses where
independent regulatory bodies have done a great job, one is left with the impression that the
claim is more of a wishful thinking rather than substantive evidence. As a result, this
conclusion has no legs to stand on.

In summary, the argument is flawed and therefore unconvincing. It could be considerably

strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the relevant facts. In order to assess the
merits of a certain situation, it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.

5. Final tips

During the tutorial type in a few sentences in the mock essay window to get
used to the keyboard.
Again during the tutorial, jot down on your notebook the basic structure of
your essays or the opening sentences in case you get too nervous and forget
them when the clock starts ticking.
Write as much as you can. Try to write at least 500 words per essay.
Always have the e-rater in mind as your potential reviewer. Remember that
the human rater will make every effort to grade just like the e-rater. In that
sense, keep your structure and volume in mind over actual quality/content.
Be careful of spelling mistakes. Double check words that you normally know
you misspell (e.g. exercise). Try to finish 2-3 minutes before time is up so you
 can slowly re-read your essay for the purposes of spell checking. Do not
reorganize/delete sentences/paragraphs with less than 2 min left.
No matter how great you thought your essays went, try to stay humble and
focused - remember this was just a warm-up and the real stuff hasn't started yet!

Good luck!
_________________

Chinese Democracy is misunderstood...at your nearest BestBuy.

Best AWA guide here: how-to-get-6-0-awa-my-guide-64327.html

GMAT AWA Example Essay

BY MIKE MCGARRY ON OCTOBER 30, 2012 IN AWA

See an ideal GMAT AWA essay example.

In the previous post, I demonstrated some brainstorming and identified six
objections to this argument. I then selected three of them as the basis of the essay
that follows. This is one way to go about writing the essay.
Introductory paragraph:
In a memo to the president of Omega University, the music department chair argued
that the university should expand the music-therapy program. This argument is
substantially flawed. The argument presents inconclusive information, offering
dubious support, and from this draws unreasonably far-reaching conclusions.
First main paragraph:
The evidence cited involves ambiguous language. For example, the argument
asserts that the symptoms of mental illness are less pronounced after a group
music-therapy sessions. Of course, calm music will have a soothing effect on almost
anyone, but can this be considered a legitimate treatment for the mentally ill?
Presumably, the benefits of music therapy are neither as powerful nor as long-
lasting as those of appropriate medications. Simply by making the claim that
symptoms are less pronounced, the author has failed to indicate whether the
improvement is significant enough to merit any serious investment in this new field.
The music chair also cites an increase in job openings in the field of music-
therapy. This is another unfortunately indefinite word. The word increase might
mean that music-therapy is a wildly burgeoning new field, although nothing suggests
that this is the case. Alternately, the word increase might denote, for example, a
rise from 60 jobs nationwide last year to 70 this year admittedly, this is an
increase, although a change across such small numbers hardly would be large
enough to warrant any major modifications in a universitys programs.
Second main paragraph:
Having presented such questionable evidence, the music chair then draws a grand
sweeping conclusion: the graduates of the universitys program will have no
trouble finding jobs in this field. Quite rare is the combination of a vibrant
professional field and a thriving economy, such that applicants entering this field
have no trouble finding a job. Even if there are a plethora of jobs in this mental
health niche, how do we know that these jobs would go to recent graduates of
Omega University? Surely practitioners with years of experience, or recent
graduates of more prestigious universities, would be preferred for such positions.
Even interpreting the questionable evidence in its most optimistic light, we hardly
can expect that this one field will explode with employment possibilities for Omega
graduates. This conclusion is far too strong, and therefore the request for funding is
not well justified.
Third main paragraph:
This music-therapy program is already in existence, so presumably it has already
had graduates leave Omega University in pursuit of employment. Evidence that all
these recent music-therapy graduates found robust job possibilities waiting for them
would enormously strengthen the argument. Curiously, the music-director is silent
on this issue. If we knew the employment statistics of these recent graduates, these
numbers would help us to evaluate this argument better.
Fourth main paragraph:
The music chair draws another untenably strong conclusion when he asserts that
expanding this program will help improve the financial status of Omega University.
When alumni of a university make millions or even billions, and choose to give back
in substantial amounts to their alma mater, that undoubtedly strengthens the
financial standing of a university. We dont know the specifics of jobs in music-
therapy, but their salaries most certainly do not rival those of hedge fund managers;
mental health services are clearly not a field in which practitioners routinely amass
remarkable wealth. Even if the graduates of music-therapy had relatively good job
prospects, which is doubtful, having a few more alumni with middle-class to upper-
middle class incomes, who, if they choose, may make some modest contributions to,
 say, the universitys annual fund this is not an impactful issue in the overall
balance sheet of universitys total budget. The claim that these alumni will
substantially improve the financial status of the university is hyperbolically
overstated.
Concluding paragraph:
This argument is neither sound nor persuasive. The music director has failed to
convey any compelling reasons for Omega University to expend the music-therapy
program in his department.
This is a particular long and thorough sample essay, but it gives you an idea of what
it takes to get a 6. In line with the AWA directions, notice that I organized,
developed, and expressed my ideas about the argument presented. I provided
relevant supporting reasons and examples i.e. I didnt just say, This is bad, but I
provided a cogent and reasoned critique. Finally, I controlled the elements of
standard written English: that is to say, (a) I made no spelling or grammar mistakes,
(b) I used a wide vocabulary (not repeating any single word too much), and (c) I
varied the sentence structure (employing subordinate clauses, parallelism, infinitive
phrases, participial phrases, substantive clauses, etc.) As you write practice essays,
check yourself afterwards: is every grammatical form commonly tests on GMAT
Sentence Correction present in your practice essay? That is an excellent standard to
use.
How important is it to get a 6 for the AWA? How important is the AWA section on
the GMAT? As I discuss in that post, the AWA is clearly the least important part of
the GMAT, less important than either IR or Quantitative or Verbal, but you cant
neglect it entirely. This sample essay should give you an idea of the standard for
which to strive on the Analytical Writing Analysis.

More from Magoosh

Brainstorming for GMAT AWA
GMAT AWA How to Write an Introduction to the GMAT Essay
Score Your GMAT Essay
Active vs. Passive Voice on the GMAT
By the way, sign up for our 1 Week Free Trial to try out Magoosh GMAT Prep!
About Mike McGarry
Mike creates expert lessons and practice questions to guide GMAT students to success. He has a BS in
Physics and an MA in Religion, both from Harvard, and over 20 years of teaching experience specializing in
math, science, and standardized exams. Mike likes smashing foosballs into orbit, and despite having no
obvious cranial deficiency, he insists on rooting for the NY Mets.
GMAT AWA How to Write an Introduction to the
GMAT Essay
BY KEVIN ROCCI ON MARCH 14, 2014 IN AWA, EXAM STRATEGIES

For the Analytical Writing Assessment (AWA) on the GMAT, students are presented
with an argument and are asked to evaluate it. Students need to break down the
argument, point out weaknesses and gaps in the reasoning and examples, and
suggest ways to improve the argument. All this needs to be accomplished in thirty
minutes.

In order to write an effective essay in thirty minutes, I recommend walking into the
test with a meaty skeleton of an introduction so that you can get to what really
mattersthe body paragraphs. Let me show you what I mean.

Keep it Pithy
Your introduction should not be long. Encyclopedic texts require long introductions;
thirty-minute essays require a short introduction. An effective introduction need only
be a few sentences. My introduction for this article was only three sentences and I
recommend that you aim for around that length in your AWA essay.

Identify Where the Passage is From

 This is a simple step that many students skip. The very first sentence, before the
argument, tells us where the argument is from. This is important information
because it provides context for the argument, and it gives us language to use in our
essay. You dont want to talk about the argument generally. You want to know who
wrote the argument, who the audience of the argument is, and where it appeared.

Only Two Things to Do

In the introduction, you really have only two taskssummarize the argument and
state that the argument is weak. You always want to paraphrase and summarize the
argumentnever copy it word for word. This will help you to synthesize the
argument and understand it. And you can even limit this summary to the conclusion.
Youll end up discussing the premises in your body paragraphs when you talk about
weaknesses so no need to worry about them in the introduction.

Every argument you see on the test will be flawed and have weakness. So this is the
perfect sentence to re-use during your practice and on test day. No reason to have
something new each time. Find a sentence you like and memorize it.

Repeat Yourself
Dont repeat the same idea, but you should repeat phrases and even entire
sentences every time you write a new essay. There is no reason to reinvent
something that works. The graders wont know how many times you recycled a
phrase or sentence so make it a point to repeat yourself from essay to essay.

Here are some possible sentences to end your introduction:

This plan is likely to fail due to flaws in the reasoning and logic of the editorial.
This remedy is unlikely to be successful due to flaws in reasoning.
This argument contains some egregious flaws in reasoning making the conclusion doubtful.
The success of this recommendation is doubtful considering the logical flaws and faulty
assumptions on which it is based.
Find your own sentence and use it every time you write an essay.
Example
Lets try to make these suggestions more tangible. I have pulled an argument from
the list of arguments that could appear on the test. All argument prompts for the
AWA are made available so this is the perfect place to practice.
The following appeared as part of an editorial in the Waymarsh city newspaper:

Last year the parents of first graders in our school district expressed satisfaction
with the reading skills their children developed but complained strongly about their
childrens math skills. To remedy this serious problem and improve our districts
elementary education, everyone in the teacher-training program at Waymarsh
University should be required to take more courses in mathematics.

Introduction 1:
The editorial that appeared in the Waymarsh city Newspaper claims that the best
way to improve math education in first grade in the school district is to require
students in the teacher-training program at Waymarsh University to take more
courses in mathematics. This plan is likely to fail due to flaws in the reasoning and
logic of the editorial.
In this introduction, every thing that needs to be said has been said. The grader can
read this introduction quickly, knows that I have read the editorial and that I
understand the fundamental claim of the argument, and knows what I will talk about
in my body paragraphs. There is really nothing else that needs to be there.

Introduction 2:
The editorial that appeared in the Waymarsh city Newspaper pointed out that
parents were upset about their childrens math skills. To correct this issue, the
editorial recommends that students in the teacher-training program at Waymarsh
University take more courses in mathematics. This remedy is unlikely to be
successful due to flaws in reasoning.
This introduction is similar to the previous one, but summarizes the whole editorial
and not just the conclusion. But it still maintains the same logic and organization
summarize and then state that its flawed.

Takeaway
An essay with a score of four or higher is not that way because of the introduction. A
strong essay is strong because it identifies the most damaging flaws and analyzes
the gaps in logic. It recommends ways to improve the argument and uses relevant
examples to illustrate why something is flawed. All of this happens in the body
paragraphsnot in the introduction or conclusion. So dont fuss about the
introduction. Keep it concise and move past it quickly so that you can spend more
time in the heart of your essaythe paragraphs that analyze the argument in your
body.

For more GMAT AWA strategies, check out my posts on organizing a body
paragraphand writing a conclusion!

Happy studying!

GMAT AWAHow to Organize a Body Paragraph

BY KEVIN ROCCI ON APRIL 18, 2014 IN AWA

Now that weve discussed how to write an introduction, it is time to turn to writing a
body paragraph. What follows is a layout, a map if you will, of what to do in your
body paragraphs. If you include each of these pieces in two to three body
paragraphs, youll be on track for a strong score on the writing section of the GMAT.

I. Identification: Focus on a Premise

The first thing you will need to do in your paragraph is identify what part of the
argument you intend to analyze. The best way to do this is by simply summarizing
the premise in the argument. You can state that it is flawed at this point, but it is not
necessary. Youll have plenty of time to do that, and the reader already knows what
will happen from what you told them in the introduction. Paraphrase, summarize,
and use synonyms to present the premisedont copy word for wordand this is a
great way to lay the groundwork for your analysis.

II. Name Calling: Describe the Flaw

Now that you have summarized the premise and presented it to the reader, time to
name the flaw and describe it. We are not always able to name the flaw in the
argument, and are not required to know the name of logical fallacies, but if you can,
do it. This is a great way to signal to the reader that you know what is going on in
arguments, and it will focus your mind on how to expose the flaw. Argument flaws
are flawed for different reasons and each requires a certain approach when analyzing
and attacking. Here is a fun, engaging resource that goes through some common,
everyday logical flallacies, which you are bound to see some of on the test.
If you cant name the flaw, then you can at least talk about what the flaw is. You can
begin to describe what makes it a flaw, which will lead nicely into your next point in
the paragraph.

III. Whys It a Flaw: Explain by Way of Example

The flaw is exposed, now time to show the reader why it is a flaw. To do this, you
need to talk about it by way of example. This can involve hypothetical, yet real
world, examples drawn from the argument, or it can involve real world examples
that you are familiar with. We cant expect our reader to understand the
ramifications of the flaw, so this is the time to really spell it out for the reader. Give
them something tangible that reveals what the argument is missing or what might
happen as a result of the flawed premise. One note, this will be the bulkiest part of
the paragraph, containing the most sentences.

If done well, this discussion will flow nicely from the specific premise and flaw into a
broader discussion of the argument and its conclusion.

IV. State the Obvious: Flaws Hurt Arguments

This is a common step skipped in student essays. We must return to the larger
picture. Students assume that everything will make sense once the flaw is exposed,
but this is far too brash. We cant just expect our reader to get it. We need to
speak plainly and directly about how the flaw weakens the argument, and more
specifically, the recommendation, plan, or conclusion of the argument. Not all flaws
weaken arguments in the same way so be specific about what aspect of the
conclusion is questionable.

V. Do Good: Improve and Strengthen the Argument

Now that youve taken the time to analyze the argument, break down a flaw, and
explain the result of that flaw to the conclusion, time to build it back up. Approach
the essay as a concerned and interested party, responding to the argument with
sympathy. Dont just be destructive. Give suggestions for improvement. And if you
dont like the conclusion, peer into the heart of what it is trying to accomplish and
recommend a way to get there.

Example
Talk only gets us so far. Lets look at an example prompt and write a sample body
paragraph that contains all these points. All prompts that appear on the GMAT are
made available to us. Thats where you should do your practice.
The following appeared in the editorial section of a West Cambria newspaper:
A recent review of the West Cambria volunteer ambulance service revealed a longer
average response time to accidents than was reported by a commercial ambulance
squad located in East Cambria. In order to provide better patient care for accident
victims and to raise revenue for our town by collecting service fees for ambulance
use, we should disband our volunteer service and hire a commercial ambulance
service.

What follows is a sample paragraph. I have numbered the sentences so that they
correspond to the headings above so that you know the purpose of each sentence.

(I) The major tenet of the editorial from the West Cambia newspaper is the
comparison of West Cambrias volunteer ambulance service and East Cambrias
commercial ambulance service. (II) But the argument fails to account for differences
between these two localesa logical fallacy of composition and division, and in
common parlance, attempting to compare apples and oranges. (III) In no way does
the editorial establish how, and if, West and East Cambria are the same. (III) Since
the editorial points to response times, it should establish that these regions are not
distinct, but very similar. (III) For example, if West Cambia is in the city center and
East Cambria is in the suburbs, this would explain the difference in response times,
and thus a commercial ambulance service would be no faster in their responses to
an accident. (III) A city center has more traffic, more congestion, and more
accidents thereby making anyones response time higher. (IV) Since the editorial
fails to clarify the similarities and differences of East and West Cambria, there is no
way to know if this will benefit victims of accidents. (V) If we were to learn that West
and East Cambria are similar, have similar traffic congestion, share the same peak
hours of usage, and are built on a similar street grid, then perhaps bringing in a
commercial ambulance would be an improvement in West Cambria.

Takeaway
As you can see from the sample paragraph, there is a lot to accomplish in a short
amount of time. This is one reason I encourage students to keep their introductions
and conclusions brief. With practice, armed with this format and structure, you will
find that writing these paragraphs will be natural and quick. Continue to practice
under time constraints and youll increase incrementally until you have no problem
jotting down a quick essay analyzing any argument.

Happy Studying!

GMAT AWA How to Write a Conclusion

BY KEVIN ROCCI ON APRIL 28, 2014 IN AWA, EXAM STRATEGIES, STUDY TIPS

Welcome to the final installment on writing your argument analysis essay. We

covered the introduction and body paragraphs, and now we bring it to a close with
conclusions. Ill cover what to put in your conclusion and end with an example.

Keep it Pithy
As with the introduction to your essay, you should not dwell in the conclusion. The
heart of your essay, what really matters toward your score, is in the body
paragraphs. Theses should be bulky and in depth, but the conclusion should be short
and to the point. Wrap things up in a timely manner so that you can get to business
of editing and revising your essay.

Recap the Major Faults

To keep things manageable and short, dont go into the details. You only need to
recap the major problems in the argument. Sometimes it is enough to say that there
are major problems in the argument. Ignore the desire to repeat all the main points
that you covered in the body paragraphs. This will only take extra space and waste
precious time.

Avoid sounding too generic. Many students will regurgitate a line about problems and
flaws that sounds like it could be used in any essay. Although Ive encouraged
students to reuse phrases and sentences in the past, I think that this can be taken
too far. Students become too generic and dont even try to make the sentence fit
with the essay. So at least take the time to mention aspects of the argument in the
conclusion. If it came from a company memo or an editorial in a newspaper, mention
that. If it involved a certain company or city, mention the name.

General Recommendations for Success

Finally, recommend a way to achieve the goal stated in the article. As I have said in
previous posts, it is important to approach the analysis of the argument as an
interested party. You dont want to be wholly negative. For one, you will write a
better analysis if you imagine yourself tied to the argument in some way, and two,
the prompt asks you to strengthen the argument. The directions read:

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to
analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example,
you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and
what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You
can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the
argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically
sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.
Ive recommended adding a strengthening point to each body paragraph, but now in
the conclusion, broaden the suggestion. Find some general evidence that will make
the argument more convincing or make it irrefutable. Suggest a change so that the
logic stands on firmer ground.

Example
Enough said. Lets turn these recommendations into an actual paragraph. Below is
an actual prompt that might appear on your GMAT. You will find all arguments that
can appear on the GMAT on the MBA website.

The following appeared in a memorandum from the director of marketing for a

pharmaceutical company:

According to a survey of 5,000 urban residents, the prevalence of stress headaches

increases with educational level, so that stress headaches occur most often among
people with graduate-school degrees. It is well established that, nationally, higher
educational levels usually correspond with higher levels of income. Therefore, in
marketing our new pain remedy, Omnilixir, we should send free samples primarily to
graduate students and to people with graduate degrees, and we should concentrate
on advertising in professional journals rather than in general interest magazines.

And heres a sample conclusion. Although out of place without an essay leading into
it, you should be able to get a sense of what was said in the essay and see the major
recommendations from above.

After some analysis, the director of marketing has more work to do. Whether the
memorandum was hastily drafted or merely meant for brainstorming, its clear that
the rash assumptions and the confusion between causation and mere correlation will
doom this marketing campaign for Omnilixir. Yet sending free samples to potential
clients is not a bad idea; the marketing department needs to better identify their
target market.

Takeaway
Now you are ready to write your own argument analysis essay. You should have a
better sense of what to do in the conclusion, and thats all. Just because youve read
about what to do, doesnt mean you can actually do it. To master the essay, you
have to practice. Make writing a regular part of your studies. You dont even have
to write a complete essay. Grab a prompt and practice a body paragraph or an
introduction. Set a timer and see if you can write a introduction and conclusion in
four minutes or less. Ready. Set. Write!
Happy Studying!

GMAT AWA Example Essay

BY MIKE MCGARRY ON OCTOBER 30, 2012 IN AWA

See an ideal GMAT AWA essay example.

In the previous post, I demonstrated some brainstorming and identified six
objections to this argument. I then selected three of them as the basis of the essay
that follows. This is one way to go about writing the essay.
Introductory paragraph:
In a memo to the president of Omega University, the music department chair argued
that the university should expand the music-therapy program. This argument is
substantially flawed. The argument presents inconclusive information, offering
dubious support, and from this draws unreasonably far-reaching conclusions.
First main paragraph:
The evidence cited involves ambiguous language. For example, the argument
asserts that the symptoms of mental illness are less pronounced after a group
music-therapy sessions. Of course, calm music will have a soothing effect on almost
anyone, but can this be considered a legitimate treatment for the mentally ill?
Presumably, the benefits of music therapy are neither as powerful nor as long-
lasting as those of appropriate medications. Simply by making the claim that
symptoms are less pronounced, the author has failed to indicate whether the
improvement is significant enough to merit any serious investment in this new field.
The music chair also cites an increase in job openings in the field of music-
therapy. This is another unfortunately indefinite word. The word increase might
mean that music-therapy is a wildly burgeoning new field, although nothing suggests
that this is the case. Alternately, the word increase might denote, for example, a
rise from 60 jobs nationwide last year to 70 this year admittedly, this is an
increase, although a change across such small numbers hardly would be large
enough to warrant any major modifications in a universitys programs.
Second main paragraph:
Having presented such questionable evidence, the music chair then draws a grand
sweeping conclusion: the graduates of the universitys program will have no
trouble finding jobs in this field. Quite rare is the combination of a vibrant
professional field and a thriving economy, such that applicants entering this field
have no trouble finding a job. Even if there are a plethora of jobs in this mental
health niche, how do we know that these jobs would go to recent graduates of
Omega University? Surely practitioners with years of experience, or recent
graduates of more prestigious universities, would be preferred for such positions.
Even interpreting the questionable evidence in its most optimistic light, we hardly
can expect that this one field will explode with employment possibilities for Omega
graduates. This conclusion is far too strong, and therefore the request for funding is
not well justified.
Third main paragraph:
This music-therapy program is already in existence, so presumably it has already
had graduates leave Omega University in pursuit of employment. Evidence that all
these recent music-therapy graduates found robust job possibilities waiting for them
would enormously strengthen the argument. Curiously, the music-director is silent
on this issue. If we knew the employment statistics of these recent graduates, these
numbers would help us to evaluate this argument better.
Fourth main paragraph:
The music chair draws another untenably strong conclusion when he asserts that
expanding this program will help improve the financial status of Omega University.
When alumni of a university make millions or even billions, and choose to give back
in substantial amounts to their alma mater, that undoubtedly strengthens the
financial standing of a university. We dont know the specifics of jobs in music-
therapy, but their salaries most certainly do not rival those of hedge fund managers;
mental health services are clearly not a field in which practitioners routinely amass
remarkable wealth. Even if the graduates of music-therapy had relatively good job
prospects, which is doubtful, having a few more alumni with middle-class to upper-
middle class incomes, who, if they choose, may make some modest contributions to,
say, the universitys annual fund this is not an impactful issue in the overall
balance sheet of universitys total budget. The claim that these alumni will
substantially improve the financial status of the university is hyperbolically
overstated.
Concluding paragraph:
This argument is neither sound nor persuasive. The music director has failed to
convey any compelling reasons for Omega University to expend the music-therapy
program in his department.
This is a particular long and thorough sample essay, but it gives you an idea of what
it takes to get a 6. In line with the AWA directions, notice that I organized,
developed, and expressed my ideas about the argument presented. I provided
relevant supporting reasons and examples i.e. I didnt just say, This is bad, but I
provided a cogent and reasoned critique. Finally, I controlled the elements of
standard written English: that is to say, (a) I made no spelling or grammar mistakes,
(b) I used a wide vocabulary (not repeating any single word too much), and (c) I
varied the sentence structure (employing subordinate clauses, parallelism, infinitive
phrases, participial phrases, substantive clauses, etc.) As you write practice essays,
check yourself afterwards: is every grammatical form commonly tests on GMAT
Sentence Correction present in your practice essay? That is an excellent standard to
use.
How important is it to get a 6 for the AWA? How important is the AWA section on
the GMAT? As I discuss in that post, the AWA is clearly the least important part of
the GMAT, less important than either IR or Quantitative or Verbal, but you cant
neglect it entirely. This sample essay should give you an idea of the standard for
which to strive on the Analytical Writing Analysis.

Argument Essay Template for GMAT AWA

This is a sample outline for the GMATs Argument Essay. Here we are aiming for 5
paragraphs total. You may opt for a shorter 4 paragraph version if you have trouble
finishing 3 body paragraphs, but try for 5 paragraphs. If you are an adept writer, you
may wish to place your How to Strengthen paragraph on its own right before the
Conclusion, and then have a separate shorter Conclusion. This template is only a
suggestion, so feel free to adjust it slightly into a version that best works for you!
Remember to practice writing at least 2-3 full essays with the time constraint before
Test Day!

Check out these articles for more MBA/GMAT essay advice!

Paragraph 1 Introduction (3-4 sentences)
Like a Critical Reasoning passage, before you begin writing you will need to
understand the Conclusion, Evidence, and underlying Assumptions in the argument.
Do not use self-reference, or the words I agree or I disagree anywhere in your
essay. You will absolutely use phrases like the argument and the author but you
want your statements to come across as accepted fact, not the small opinions of
once person. Your main task in your introduction is to show you understand the
premise. Restate it in your own words.

Introduce the timeliness of the arguments topic

Describe the argument in your own words

State emphatically that the argument is flawed.

For example, your introduction could take a form like this:

The issue of _______ is as timely as ever. Recently, _________. Regarding this issue, the
author of the argument claims __________. He suggests that _________.Though the
underlying issue certainly has merit, because of a lack of evidence, weak
assumptions, and vague language the authors argument is unsubstantiated and
deeply flawed.

You do not have to list your three examples in your thesis, but it can be a nice way of
clarifying for the reader what you will be discussing.

Paragraph 2 Lack of Evidence (4-6 sentences)

Almost every Argument can be criticized for a lack of evidence. If evidence is

provided, how can you explain that it is confusing, unrelated, or unsubstantiated?

Paragraph 3 Weak Assumption (4-6 sentences)

What is the author assuming to be true? Show the reader you can see the gaps in
logic between the weak evidence provided and the conclusion. Use very clear
transition words between your body paragraphs.
Paragraph 4 Vague Language (4-6 sentences)

Use a transition phrase again, then attack the specific terminology the author utilizes
in the argument. How many is many? Who exactly does he mean by most? Here
you will be using the authors own rhetorical construction against him.

Paragraph 5 How to Strengthen (2-4 sentences)

In your conclusion, introduce a few ways the author could improve his argument,
other than the three flaws you have already discussed. Reinforce the idea that there
is SOME merit in the issue underlying the authors argument, but not nearly enough
as it to be convincing. Heres an outline:

Although as written the argument is categorically unconvincing, the author could

strengthen his position were he to _________, and _________. If he _____________, then
the arguments reasoning would be significantly improved. However, without these
changes, the argument is implausible and the reasoning faulty.

Need more help on the GMAT AWA essays? Get personalized tutoring in live online
sessions with an experienced expert instructor on Grockit today!

How to get a 6.0 on AWA

By GrantMeAdmission, August 20, 2014
I used this guide last time, and only reviewed AWA once the night before
my test. I ended up getting a 6.0. I hope this is useful to you as well. (Click
on the image to enlarge it)
 *I just made a quick visual outline of a guide made by chineseburned.
Check out the original post here.
If you liked this post, make sure to subscribe on my main page and
follow me on twitter @GrantMeAdmissio
Ace the Essays? No, Thanks!
by Stacey Koprince on December 30th, 2009
14Bookmark
16 comments

Stacey is a Manhattan Prep Instructor living in Montreal. Learn more

aboutManhattan Preps prep options or read more articles from Manhattan Prep.

Posted in
GMAT AWA Essays

We all know that the essays on the GMAT are scored separately and
that the schools dont care as much about the essay scores. We also know we have to write the
essays first, before we get to the more important quant and verbal sections, so we dont want to
use up too much brain-power on the essays. Still, we cant just bomb the essay section; the
schools do care about the essayssomewhat. So how do we do a good enough job on the essays
without expending so much energy that were negatively affected during the multiple-choice
portion of the test?
We need to develop a template, an organizational framework on which to hang our writing. The
template will not, of course, tell us exactly what to write. For that, we need the actual essay
prompt, which we wont see until we take the test. We can, however, determine how to organize
the information ahead of time, as well as the general kinds of messages we need to convey at
various points throughout.

The template should tell us:

How many paragraphs to use

The primary purpose of each of those paragraphs
The kinds of information that need to be conveyed in each paragraph
The template will vary a little bit from person to person; the important thing is to have a
consistent template for yourself that youve worked out in advance of the official test. In
addition, we will need slightly different templates for the two different kinds of essays, so take
note of the differences below.
As a general rule, essays should have either four or five paragraphs total. The first paragraph is
always the introduction, the last paragraph is always the conclusion, and the body (middle)
paragraphs are for the examples we choose to use.
 Each paragraph should contain certain things; these are listed in the below sections. The
information does not need to be presented in the given order below, though; just make sure that
each paragraph does contain the necessary information in some sort of clear and logical order. In
addition, the information listed below is the minimum necessary info; you can certainly add more
where appropriate.

First Paragraph
Summarize the issue
State a thesis
Acknowledge that the other side does have some merit
Introduce your examples
The first paragraph should contain a brief summary of the issue at hand in your own words
(dont just repeat what the essay prompt said). For an Argument essay, briefly summarize the
conclusion of the given argument. For the Issue essay, briefly summarize the issue upon which
the prompt has asked you to convey your opinion. For either, you dont need more than a one to
two sentence summary.
The first paragraph should also contain a thesis statement. The thesis is typically one sentence
and conveys to the reader your overall message or point for the essay that you wrote. For the
Argument essay, you can write most of your thesis sentence before you get to the test! You
already know that the Argument will contain flaws, and that you will be discussing how those
flaws hurt the authors conclusion. Guess what? Thats your thesis!

While the argument does have some merit, there are several serious flaws which serve to
undermine the validity of the authors conclusion that XYZ.

DONT USE THAT EXACT SENTENCE. Theyre going to get suspicious if hundreds of people use
the same sentence. (Besides, thats my sentence. Come up with your own! )

Note the opening clause: While the argument does have some merit. This is whats called
acknowledging the other side. We dont say, Hey, your argument is completely terrible!
Theres nothing good about it at all! We acknowledge that some parts may be okay, or some
people may feel differently, but our position is that the flaws are the most important issue (that
is, our thesis is the most important thing).

On the Issue essay, you wont be able to write your thesis statement ahead of time, but you do
know youll have to do two things: (1) establish one clear position for yourself and (2)
acknowledge the other side. (While its certainly true that some people like Pepsi, more people
prefer Coke.)

Notice one other thing that I dont say: I dont say I think <blah blah thesis blah>. I state my
thesis as though it is fact and reasonable people surely agree with me. Thats a hallmark of a
persuasive essay.
 Finally, the first paragraph needs to introduce whatever examples were going to use in the body
paragraphs below. Dont launch into the examples fully; that will come later.

Body Paragraphs
You can choose to use either 2 or 3 body paragraphs. (I use 2 body paragraphs, personally.
Remember, we just need to be good enough!)

Argument essay:

Introduce one flaw

Explain why it is a flaw
Suggest ways to fix the flaw
Issue essay:

Introduce one real-world example

Give enough detail for reader to understand relevance of example
Show how example supports your thesis
The body of an essay is where we support our thesis statement. For the argument essay, your
support will come from the prompt itself: brainstorm several flaws from the argument (try to find
the biggest, most glaring flaws). Each flaw gets its own paragraph, so youll need either two or
three, depending upon how many body paragraphs you want to write. Explicitly explain why this
flaw makes the conclusion less valid in some way, and then discuss how the author might fix that
flaw.

For example, lets say that an argument claims that firing half of a companys employees will help
the company to reduce costs and therefore become more profitable. While its certainly true that
chopping half of your payroll will reduce costs, it doesnt necessarily follow that the company will
become more profitable! That loss of personnel may reduce productivity, hurt morale of the
remaining employees, and so on. The author of such an argument could bolster the claim by, for
example, showing evidence that half of the employees are fully redundant and firing them
wouldnt affect the company adversely (if such evidence actually exists, of course!).

For the issue essay, your support will come from your brain: youll have to brainstorm some real-
life example (something that actually happened in the past) in order to support your thesis. That
example could be something from your own life (work history, school, friend of a friend) or from
the broader world (business, history, and so on). Stating that Cokes market share is higher than
Pepsis, for example, would bolster your claim that more people prefer Coke.
There is no inherent advantage to a personal example versus a broader world example, but if
you use a personal example, be sure to provide enough detail that the reader can understand the
relevance. When you use real-world examples that the readers are likely to know, you dont have
to worry about, for example, explaining what Coke and Pepsi are.
 Finally, make sure to tie your example specifically back to your original thesis. Dont make the
reader connect the dots: tell him or her exactly how this example supports your thesis.

Conclusion Paragraph
Re-state your thesis (using new words)
Re-acknowledge the other side (using new words)
Briefly summarize how your examples supported your thesis (using new words)
Minimum 3 sentences; ideally 4 to 5
Are you noticing a theme within the above bullet points? Basically, the conclusion paragraph isnt
going to contain much new information. Its a conclusion; the major points should already have
been made earlier in the essay. What youre doing now is tying everything together in one neat
package: yes, the other side has some merit, but heres my point-of-view and, by the way, I
proved my case using these examples.

Okay, get to work!

Before you go into the real test, you should have a fully developed template, so that all you have
to do is come up with your two examples and your thesis statement, and then hang your words
on your framework. Practice with the above as a starting point until you develop something with
which youre comfortable. Dont forget to leave some time to proof your essay; its okay to have
a few typos, but systematic errors will lower your score.

http://www.mbacrystalball.com/blog/2012/12/24/gmat-awa-sample-essays-testing/
The article on trends and lifestyles that apppeared in a magazine claims
that people are not as concerned about their intake of red meat and fatty
cheeses as they were a decade a ago .The argument is likely to fail due to its
faulty reasoning and unconvincing logic .Moreover no substantial evidence
has been mentioned inorder to draw a logical conclusion from its premise .

First, the argument assumes that Hearts delight , a store that sold organic
fruits and whole grain flours in the 1960's, represents the peoples habits
about eating red meat and fatty cheese. However the author fails to consider
that fact that the store might have started selling vegetables and whole
grain flours due to sevral other reasons ,like increasing cost and low profit
margins in of organic food and better and easier procurement processes for
the red meat It would have been much clear if the examples substantiating
those assumptions were present in the argument.

Second, the claims that owners of Good earth cafe ,an old vegetarian
restaurant, are living a modest life styles and correlates it with their
business profits to conclude that there business is reducing . However the
author fails to consider possibilities that they may well prefer leading a
simple and modest living to a more flamboyant one . Also The owners may
not show off so much about their lifestyles and the millionaires might have
huge debts but consider living in the best possible manner . The argument
could be considered strenthened if the author mentioned concrete evidence
to bolster his claim .Moreover before concluding the authoor must negate all
other possibilities

In summary the argument is flawed due to above mentioned reasons

.Inorder to thoroughly evaluate a situation complete knowledge of
contributing factors should be there Its rash assumptions and confusion
between correlations and causation are likely to make the claim that people
are not as concerend about their intake of red meat and fatty cheeses as
they were a decade a ago .unconvincing and faulty .It could have been
considered a sound argumnet if it mentioned relevant exapmples and
evidence to corroborate it

in summary the argument does not provide concrete evidence and other
relevant factor and makes a rash conclusion ...... concluding

The article that appeared as a part of business plan of an investment and

financial consulting claims that demand for coffee will increase and that for
cola will decrease over the next 20 years and therefore the Business plan
conlcudes one should consider transferring investments from Cola Loca to
Early Bird Coffee. The argument is flawed due to faulty reasoning and
illogical assumptions .Moreover it does not provinde convincing evidence to
prove its conclusion from the given premise.

First, the argument assumes that the number of older adulsts will
significant;ly increase as the population ages over the next 20 years . This
statement is a strech as it does not take into consideration the effect of the
new births that would balance the effect of ageing popuelation for exmaple
A child who is born at a particular date will add to the age group that
drinks more cola and less coffee and a significantly high birthrate can
render the assumption invalid . It could have been much clear if argument
provided statistics to prove his point for an ageing poipulation which cannot
be concuded as such

Second,the argument claims that the past 40 years of trends among the
cola and coffee drinkers are unlikely to change .This is another unconvincing
assumtptions.The argument does not negate any consideration that might
change the past 40 year trends. For example a study on cola and coffee
drinkers from a reliable institution may conclude that coffee drinking has
detrimental effect on the human health especially human in the age bracket
of 40-70.Such a study can change the preferences completely and the
conclusion thus becomes invalid.

Finally, the author concludes the investments should be transferred from the
Coal Loca to early Bird Coffee,However the argumenst fails to take into
consideration the fact that there can be several other factors that can doom
the Early Bird Coffee such as poor managment of resources , bad decision in
trems of investments etc which can hurt the conclusion despite the fact that
coffee consumtion may increase . Thus the argument could have been
strenthened if it mentioned relevant statistics and data regarding the
performnace of the Early bird Coffee company .

In summary the above argument is flawed due to above mentioned reasons .

Its rash assumptions and confusion between causation and correlation are
likely to make the advice of shiting investment from Cola Loca to Early bird
Coffee unconvincing .Inorder to assess a particular situation complete
knowledge of all the contributing factors is required , however in this
argument several loopholes have been left for the reader to assume.

The article that appered in the business section of a local newspaper states
although a foreign motorcycle maker has copied the motorcycle X of a US
manufacturer ,it has failed to attract the customers of the motorcycle X
customers due to reasons other than its loud noise .The articles supports it
claims with several faulty claims and evidences that are not conclusive in
nature .This argument is likely to fail due to illogical reasoning and weak
evidences .

First, The author claims that loud noise of motorcycle X is not the
explanation for its high demand among customers against a simialr model of
motorcycle by another manufacturer because foreign cars which are of
foreign make are quiter but still attract customers in US .Here the author
assumes that the customers have similar preferences for car and motorcycle
which migh not be tru as one may prefer a luxury sedan with best sound
proofing over a loud sports car but may choose a sports bike with higher
noise over the conventional ones .Thus author should substatiate his
comparison for preferences with more examples and staistics to make the
argument strong .

Second, the author states that the advertisements of motorcycle X has voice
overs or rock musics rather than engine roar on the sound track thus
conclusing that loud noise is not differentiating factor . However the
argument does talk about what is displayed in the video ,there is possibility
that the visual state the loud noise of the motorcycle X as its unique selling
point in the ads thus users might be attracted towards the loudnoise
claimed in the visual and thus test drive it to experinece the same .Here the
argument does not cleraly state the visual aspecst of the ads thus making
the claim weak .

Finally , author states that its the durability and sleek lines which are
highlighted in the advertisement with no audio supporting loud noise of
motorcycle X in the ad .However author fails to account for the fact that
people may find the ad appealing enough to give the motorcycleX a try and
thus once they test it they get attracted towards the loud noise .Thus the
argument does not take into account experience that loud noise gives to
xutomer when they encounter it.The argument could have been
strengthened if the author substantiated it with concrete evidences and
reviews of buyers.

In conclusion, the argument is flawed because of the above mentioned

reasons .The authors claim that MotorcycleX customers are not attracted
towards another similar motorcycle by a different manufacture is weak and
unconvincing as the argument does not justify its claims and provides
unsubstantiated evidences to support the same .It could have been
strengthened if the author had mentioned in depth analysis all contributing
factors towards the claim.

The article on trends and lifestyles that apppeared in a magazine claims

that people are not as concerned about their intake of red meat and fatty
cheeses as they were a decade a ago .The argument is likely to fail due to its
faulty reasoning and unconvincing logic .Moreover no substantial evidence
has been mentioned inorder to draw a logical conclusion from its premise

In conclusion, the argument is flawed because of the above mentioned

reasons .The authors claim that MotorcycleX customers are not attracted
towards another similar motorcycle by a different manufacture is weak and
unconvincing as the argument does not justify its claims and provides
unsubstantiated evidences to support the same .It could have been
strengthened if the author had mentioned in depth analysis all contributing
factors towards the claim.
The article that appeared in the market research report states that xy general stores executives
should launch a signifiant rebranding and marketing campiagn to change the XY's image and
thereby bring new consumer into the stores .The argument is likely to fail due to faulty reasoning
and illogical assumptions .Morover the argument does not substantiate its evidences to prove its
conclusion from the given premises .

First , the arguments states that the XY general store shpiuld launch a significant rebranding and
market campiagn to change the company's image .Here the author does not provide any
information of previous marketing campiagns and rebranding activities.It is possible that the
rebranding activities and market campiagn may not be affective in changing the image as the
products sold at XY stpores have themselves have created a fixed mindset, which might me
difficult to change .Moreover there is a strong possibility that the agnecy that the XY stores hires
does not not have ability to deal with the scale of campign required and XY might retain it . Thus
inorder to strenthen it claim the auhtor should provide indepth analysis of the previous campign
and rebranding activities befpore suggesting the same for the company's image change .

Second, the argument assumes that change in company's image will bring in new
customers.However the argument faild to consider a possibility that that image change might
spoil the company's standing in the market and may lead to existing customer might not prefer it
anymore with its new image .This can lead to negative publicity and can inturn effect the
mindset of the new customer who might also shun the company . Therefore the correlation
between image change and new customer need to be examined further inorder to make this
argument a sound one .

Finally , The argument states that since 60 % of thhose surveyed recognized the name of XY
stores but have not shoopped at the XY stores , so there is a huge scope of bringing in new
customer .Here the argument does not consider the sample size and if it represent an unbiased
sample of people .It is possible that more that 90% of of all consumer are XY customer but the
saaple taken in this survey was biased .Thius the veracity of sample need to be checked
beforedrwaing any consluiosn from it .

In conclusion , The argument is flawed due to above mentioned reasons . The arguments claims
to change company image and increase inflow of cutomers through re branding and marketing
campaign is weak and unconvincing as it the author does not justify its claims tand makes rash
assumptions .It could be strengthened if all contributing factors were taken into consideration .
AWA ESSAYS: Analyze Argument

ESSAY QUESTION:

The following appeared in a market research report examining consumer perceptions of a chain of clothing stores:

"A recent survey commissioned by the market research department of XY Gen Stores indicated a high level of
recognition among consumers of the brand and the nature of the apparel sold in XY Gen Stores. However, the survey
also indicated that approximately 60% of those surveyed that recognized the name of XY Gen Stores had never
shopped at one of the company's stores. Because of this result, XY Gen Stores executives should launch a significant
rebranding and marketing campaign to change the company's image and thereby bring new consumers into the
stores.

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. Point out flaws in the argument's logic and analyze the argument's
underlying assumptions. In addition, evaluate how supporting evidence is used and what evidence might counter the
argument's conclusion. You may also discuss what additional evidence could be used to strengthen the argument or
what changes would make the argument more logically sound.

YOUR RESPONSE:
The article that appeared in the market research report states that
xy general stores executives should launch a significant re
branding and marketing campaign to change the XY's image and
thereby bring new consumer into the stores .The argument is likely
to fail due to faulty reasoning and illogical assumptions .Moreover
the argument does not substantiate THE CLAIMS to prove its
conclusion from the given premises . The argument does not provide
substantive evidence to be able to proveor even support the main conclusion
from the given premises.

First , the arguments states that the XY general store shpiuld

launch a significant rebranding and market campaign to change
the company's image .Here the author does not provide any
information of previous marketing campaigns and rebranding
activities.It is possible that the rebranding activities and market
campiagn may not be effective in changing the image as the
products sold at XY stores have themselves have created a fixed
mindset, which might me difficult to change .Moreover there is a
strong possibility that the agnecy that the XY stores hires does not
not have ability to deal with the scale of campign required and XY
might retain it . Thus inorder to strengthen it claim the author
should provide indepth analysis of the previous campaign and
rebranding activities before suggesting the same for the
company's image change .

Second, the argument assumes that change in company's image

will bring in new customers.However the argument faild to
consider a possibility that that image change might spoil the
company's standing in the market and may lead to existing
customer might not prefer it anymore with its new image .This can
lead to negative publicity and can inturn effect the mindset of the
new customer who might also shun the company . Therefore the
 correlation between image change and new customer need to be
examined further inorder to make this argument a sound one .

Finally , The argument states that since 60 % of those surveyed

recognized the name of XY stores but have not shopped at the XY
stores , so there is a huge scope of bringing in new customer .Here
the argument does not consider the sample size and if it represent
an unbiased sample of people .It is possible that more that 90% of
of all consumer are XY customer but the sample taken in this
survey was biased .Thus the veracity of sample need to be
checked before drawing any conclusion from it .

In conclusion , The argument is flawed due to above mentioned

reasons . The arguments claims to change company image and
increase inflow of customers through re branding and marketing
campaign is weak and unconvincing as it the author does not
justify its claims and makes rash assumptions .It could be
strengthened if all contributing factors were taken into
consideration .
The mayor's welcome note that appeared that appeared at the conference states that ketner
Springs is the ideal place to locate a business as ketner springs offers renowned transporation
systme and award winning parks and recreation departments. Moreover the mayors claims that
ketner springs offers perfect locale for any business office or factory .The argument is likely to fail
due to unconvincing logic and illogical assumptions.Moreover the argument does not
susbattiate the claims with relevant data to draw the conclusion from the given premise .

First , the mayor assumes that renowned transporation and award winning parks and recreation
department are the sole factors which make a place ideal for the business.There are several
factors such the market accessibility , transporation cost as well as customer preferences which
could account for a place to be an ideal one for business .the argment does not take into account
any of these and thus ignores the possibility of these playing a mojor role in the successof
business in Ketner Springs .the argument could have been strengthened if the author had
mentioned relevants statistics pertaining to the other contributing factors to support his claim.

Second, Mayors claims families love living as Ketner's schools have the lowest student to teacher
ratio in the state and its restaurants boats more kissie menu options than anywhere else in the
country . In this cliams the mayors fails to consider the possibility that despite some of the
positives there may be glaring negatives factors affecting the life of Ketner springs such as
criminal activities and safety of citizens, cost of living etc .In case Ketner springs is highly unsafe
for its citizens , the families would not prefer living in the city .Moroevr if the cost of living is
extremely high as comapred to subusrban areas ,families may prefer the suburban areas to
Ketner Springs .Clearly Mayor need to elaborate more on the various factors concerning the
families prefernec for the city to add credibility to his claims .
Finally , The mayors concludes that if one needs to locate a business or a office , one would find
perfect locale in Ketner springs but fails to corroborate hsi claims with supporting evidences . the
mayor should afddress what constitues a [refect locale and present relevant data with concrete
exaples to supprt his claims .I the abscence of the supporting evidences this this cliams sounds
weak and unconvincing

In conclusion the argument is flawed due to above mentioned reasons .The mayors claims that
ketner springs is will provide the perfect locale for any business is weak and unconvincing as
mayor does not substantiate his claims and makes rash assumptions to draw the conclusion It
could have been strengthened if the author had mentioned relevants details of all contributing
factors .

The mayor's welcome note that appeared at the conference states that Ketner Springs is the
ideal place to locate a business as Ketner springs offers renowned transportation systems and
award winning parks and recreation departments. Moreover the mayors claims that Ketner
springs offers perfect locale for any business office or factory .The argument is likely to fail due to
unconvincing logic and illogical assumptions.Moreover the argument does not substantiate the
claims with relevant data to draw the conclusion from the given premise .

First , the mayor assumes that renowned transportation and award winning parks and recreation
department are the sole factors which make a place ideal for the business.There are several
factors such as the market accessibility , transporation cost as well as customer preferences
which could account for a place to be an ideal one for business .The argument does not take into
account any of these and thus ignores the possibility of these playing a major role in the success
of business in Ketner Springs .The argument could have been strengthened if the author had
mentioned relevant statistics pertaining to the other contributing factors to support his claim.

Second, Mayors claims families love living at Ketner Springs as Ketner's schools have the lowest
student to teacher ratio in the state and its restaurants boats more kiddie menu options than
anywhere else in the country . In this claims the mayors fails to consider the possibility that
despite some of the positives there may be glaring negatives factors affecting the life of Ketner
springs such as criminal activities and safety of citizens, cost of living etc .In case Ketner springs is
highly unsafe for its citizens , the families would not prefer living in the city .Moreover if the cost
of living is extremely high as compared to suburban areas ,families may prefer the suburban
areas to Ketner Springs .Clearly Mayor need to elaborate more on the various factors concerning
the families preference for the city to add credibility to his claims .
Finally , The mayors concludes that if one needs to locate a business or a office , one would find
perfect locale in Ketner springs but fails to corroborate his claims with supporting evidences .
The mayor should address what constitutes a perfect locale and present relevant data with
concrete examples to support his claims .I the absence of the supporting evidences this this
claims sounds weak and unconvincing

In conclusion the argument is flawed due to above mentioned reasons .The mayors claims that
Ketner springs will provide the perfect locale for any business is weak and unconvincing as
mayor does not substantiate his claims and makes rash assumptions to draw the conclusion. It
could have been strengthened if the author had mentioned relevant details of all contributing
factors to support his claims .

do not ever waste time reading TEXTS OF graphs etc for the IR...just move ahead with visuals and

read the questions first .. then the information most important

do not get stuck ...if u have to get high score ..u have to get the last few correct as they shoot
score ...but if u get a series of them wrong ....u r screwed ....so keeep a good time for the end
thats ur major target ...take decision and move fast ...as anything getting u stuck...can go either
ways ...butu loose time for sure ...so just go ahead ...and cruise fast !!

The mayor's welcome note that appeared that appeared at the conference states that ketner
Springs is the ideal place to locate a business as ketner springs offers renowned transporation
systme and award winning parks and recreation departments. Moreover the mayors claims that
ketner springs offers perfect locale for any business office or factory .The argument is likely to fail
due to unconvincing logic and illogical assumptions.Moreover the argument does not
susbattiate the claims with relevant data to draw the conclusion from the given premise .

First , the mayor assumes that renowned transporation and award winning parks and recreation
department are the sole factors which make a place ideal for the business.There are several
factors such the market accessibility , transporation cost as well as customer preferences which
could account for a place to be an ideal one for business .the argment does not take into account
any of these and thus ignores the possibility of these playing a mojor role in the successof
business in Ketner Springs .the argument could have been strengthened if the author had
mentioned relevants statistics pertaining to the other contributing factors to support his claim.
Second, Mayors claims families love living as Ketner's schools have the lowest student to teacher
ratio in the state and its restaurants boats more kissie menu options than anywhere else in the
country . In this cliams the mayors fails to consider the possibility that despite some of the
positives there may be glaring negatives factors affecting the life of Ketner springs such as
criminal activities and safety of citizens, cost of living etc .In case Ketner springs is highly unsafe
for its citizens , the families would not prefer living in the city .Moroevr if the cost of living is
extremely high as comapred to subusrban areas ,families may prefer the suburban areas to
Ketner Springs .Clearly Mayor need to elaborate more on the various factors concerning the
families prefernec for the city to add credibility to his claims .

Finally , The mayors concludes that if one needs to locate a business or a office , one would find
perfect locale in Ketner springs but fails to corroborate hsi claims with supporting evidences . the
mayor should afddress what constitues a [refect locale and present relevant data with concrete
exaples to supprt his claims .I the abscence of the supporting evidences this this cliams sounds
weak and unconvincing

In conclusion the argument is flawed due to above mentioned reasons .The mayors claims that
ketner springs is will provide the perfect locale for any business is weak and unconvincing as
mayor does not substantiate his claims and makes rash assumptions to draw the conclusion It
could have been strengthened if the author had mentioned relevants details of all contributing
factors .

The mayor's welcome note that appeared at the conference states that Ketner Springs is the
ideal place to locate a business as Ketner springs offers renowned transportation systems and
award winning parks and recreation departments. Moreover the mayors claims that Ketner
springs offers perfect locale for any business office or factory .The argument is likely to fail due to
unconvincing logic and illogical assumptions.Moreover the argument does not substantiate the
claims with relevant data to draw the conclusion from the given premise .

First , the mayor assumes that renowned transportation and award winning parks and recreation
department are the sole factors which make a place ideal for the business.There are several
factors such as the market accessibility , transporation cost as well as customer preferences
which could account for a place to be an ideal one for business .The argument does not take into
account any of these and thus ignores the possibility of these playing a major role in the success
of business in Ketner Springs .The argument could have been strengthened if the author had
mentioned relevant statistics pertaining to the other contributing factors to support his claim.
Second, Mayors claims families love living at Ketner Springs as Ketner's schools have the lowest
student to teacher ratio in the state and its restaurants boats more kiddie menu options than
anywhere else in the country . In this claims the mayors fails to consider the possibility that
despite some of the positives there may be glaring negatives factors affecting the life of Ketner
springs such as criminal activities and safety of citizens, cost of living etc .In case Ketner springs is
highly unsafe for its citizens , the families would not prefer living in the city .Moreover if the cost
of living is extremely high as compared to suburban areas ,families may prefer the suburban
areas to Ketner Springs .Clearly Mayor need to elaborate more on the various factors
concerning the families preference for the city to add credibility to his claims .

Finally , The mayors concludes that if one needs to locate a business or a office , one would find
perfect locale in Ketner springs but fails to corroborate his claims with supporting evidences .
The mayor should address what constitutes a perfect locale and present relevant data with
concrete examples to support his claims .I the absence of the supporting evidences this this
claims sounds weak and unconvincing

In conclusion the argument is flawed due to above mentioned reasons .The mayors claims that
Ketner springs will provide the perfect locale for any business is weak and unconvincing as
mayor does not substantiate his claims and makes rash assumptions to draw the conclusion. It
could have been strengthened if the author had mentioned relevant details of all contributing
factors to support his claims .

thus inorder to strengthen the argument the author needs t

cleraly the auhtor must provide .....to further support the

argumnet

it could have been strengthened if the