1

00:00:03,200 --> 00:00:04,667

Hey.
Hey.

2
00:00:05,402 --> 00:00:07,927
Who are you faxing so early in the morning?

3
00:00:10,140 --> 00:00:12,131
Kind of hard to explain.

4
00:00:12,209 --> 00:00:14,769
<i>JIM: I don't have a ton of contact</i>
<i>with the Scranton branch.</i>

5
00:00:14,845 --> 00:00:18,975
But before I left,
I took a box of Dwight's stationery.

6
00:00:19,416 --> 00:00:22,544
So from time to time, I send Dwight faxes

7
00:00:23,253 --> 00:00:25,153
from himself

8
00:00:25,222 --> 00:00:26,985
from the future.

9
00:00:27,858 --> 00:00:30,918
"Dwight, at 8:00 a.m. Today
someone poisons the coffee.

10
00:00:30,994 --> 00:00:35,055
<i>"Do not drink the coffee.</i>
<i>More instructions will follow.</i>

11
00:00:35,132 --> 00:00:37,498
<i>"Cordially, Future Dwight."</i>

12
00:00:42,606 --> 00:00:44,437
<i>No!</i>

13
00:00:45,676 --> 00:00:47,166
You'll thank me later.

14
00:01:20,610 --> 00:01:22,908
MICHAEL: There she is. Jan Levinson

15
00:01:22,980 --> 00:01:24,311
first thing in the morning.
Michael.

16
00:01:24,381 --> 00:01:27,578
Love to start my day
with a hearty bowl of <i>Jan!</i>

17
00:01:27,651 --> 00:01:28,709
Michael.

18
00:01:28,785 --> 00:01:34,417
<i>(SINGING) Just call me Levinson</i>
<i>in the morning, baby</i>

19
00:01:34,491 --> 00:01:36,254
Michael.
Yes.

20
00:01:38,628 --> 00:01:42,564
I'm here to tell you
that we are closing the Scranton branch.

21
00:01:45,068 --> 00:01:46,126
I don't understand.

22
00:01:46,203 --> 00:01:49,434
The Board voted last night
to close your branch.

23
00:01:50,273 --> 00:01:52,173
On whom's authority?

24
00:01:52,943 --> 00:01:54,467
The Board's.

25
00:01:56,279 --> 00:01:57,507
What?

26
00:01:57,814 --> 00:02:02,046
I'm very sorry. I don't relish telling you this.

27
00:02:02,953 --> 00:02:05,080
You've been a big part of this company,
28
00:02:05,155 --> 00:02:09,387
and the Board asked me to thank you
for your years of service.

29
00:02:09,860 --> 00:02:10,918
You're welcome.

30
00:02:10,994 --> 00:02:13,428
A small number of people will be
transferred to the Stamford branch

31
00:02:13,497 --> 00:02:16,227
and the rest will be getting
severance packages.

32
00:02:17,467 --> 00:02:20,925
Am I a "small number" person
or a "severance package" person?

33
00:02:21,004 --> 00:02:24,872
Well, we haven't made final decisions
about personnel yet.

34
00:02:26,243 --> 00:02:28,973
But you're a "severance package" person.

35
00:02:31,648 --> 00:02:34,674
Oh, my <i>God!</i> Oh, my <i>God!</i>

36
00:02:37,020 --> 00:02:38,351
<i>No!</i>

37
00:02:42,959 --> 00:02:44,859
What are they talking about?

38
00:02:44,928 --> 00:02:46,555
I don't know.

39
00:02:47,097 --> 00:02:48,155
Is it serious?

40
00:02:48,231 --> 00:02:50,062
I don't know, Kev.

41
00:02:50,400 --> 00:02:52,664
If you find out anything,

42
00:02:55,505 --> 00:02:56,529
call me.

43
00:02:56,606 --> 00:02:58,403
You got it, buddy.

44
00:03:09,553 --> 00:03:11,384
Are you all right, Michael?
Do you want me to get you some...

45
00:03:11,455 --> 00:03:14,151
No, no, no.
A water or a tissue?

46
00:03:16,493 --> 00:03:18,051
All right. All right.

47
00:03:18,128 --> 00:03:20,596
You know what, I don't get it. I don't...

48
00:03:24,868 --> 00:03:28,031
I don't get it,
because our numbers aren't that bad,

49
00:03:28,105 --> 00:03:29,402
things are looking up.

50
00:03:29,473 --> 00:03:31,270
It's not all about numbers, Michael.

51
00:03:31,341 --> 00:03:32,603
Well...
It's about talent.

52
00:03:32,676 --> 00:03:35,304
Oh, you gotta... Josh?

53
00:03:35,378 --> 00:03:37,005
Our CFO believes that Josh...
Josh.

54
00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:39,412
...is going to play an important role
in our company's future.

55
00:03:39,483 --> 00:03:43,613
Oh, really. What role is that?
King of the stupid universe?

56
00:03:43,687 --> 00:03:45,587
Okay.
Don't do this, Jan.

57
00:03:45,655 --> 00:03:48,818
I think we're finished and I need to go.
We are not...

58
00:03:48,892 --> 00:03:51,588
I would appreciate it
if you would please use discretion

59
00:03:51,661 --> 00:03:52,787
until we get our ducks in a row.

60
00:03:52,863 --> 00:03:55,627
I know you're mad, but don't do this to me.

61
00:03:55,699 --> 00:03:58,998
I know I hurt you,
but please do not do this to me.

62
00:04:00,036 --> 00:04:02,436
Don't hurt me like I hurt you.

63
00:04:04,975 --> 00:04:06,806
Jan. Jan.

64
00:04:10,313 --> 00:04:14,215
It is an outrage. That's all. It's...

65
00:04:15,118 --> 00:04:17,985
They are making a huge, huge mistake.

66
00:04:18,955 --> 00:04:21,515
<i>Let's see Josh replace these people.</i>

67
00:04:21,591 --> 00:04:25,459
<i>Let's see Josh find another Stanley.</i>
68
00:04:25,529 --> 00:04:28,498
<i>Do you think Stanleys grow on trees?</i>
<i>Well, they don't.</i>

69
00:04:28,565 --> 00:04:30,795
<i>There is no Stanley tree.</i>

70
00:04:30,867 --> 00:04:34,325
<i>Do you think the world is crawling</i>
<i>with Phyllises?</i>

71
00:04:35,672 --> 00:04:37,572
Show me that farm.

72
00:04:37,641 --> 00:04:42,601
With Phyllises and Kevins sprouting up
all over the place ripe for the plucking.

73
00:04:46,082 --> 00:04:47,743
Show me that farm.

74
00:04:49,619 --> 00:04:52,645
Pictures. Memories.

75
00:04:53,857 --> 00:04:56,951
Look at that. They grow up so fast.

76
00:04:59,729 --> 00:05:00,889
Hey, stranger.

77
00:05:00,964 --> 00:05:03,262
Don't say that. That just sounds weird.
Please.

78
00:05:03,333 --> 00:05:05,858
Sorry, I just feel
like we haven't talked in a while.

79
00:05:05,936 --> 00:05:08,234
Well, we have nothing to talk about, Dwight.

80
00:05:08,538 --> 00:05:09,800
Just do your work.

81
00:05:10,640 --> 00:05:12,403
While you still can.

82
00:05:22,686 --> 00:05:26,554
<i>DWIGHT: When you become close with</i>
<i>someone, you develop a kind of sixth sense.</i>

83
00:05:26,923 --> 00:05:29,255
You can read their moods like a book.

84
00:05:29,326 --> 00:05:36,289
And right now, the title of Michael's book
is <i>Something Weird is Going On:</i>

85
00:05:37,133 --> 00:05:39,033
<i>What Did Jan Say?</i>

86
00:05:41,404 --> 00:05:43,531
<i>The Michael Scott Story.</i>

87
00:05:44,441 --> 00:05:47,205
By Michael Scott with Dwight Schrute.

88
00:05:48,144 --> 00:05:51,341
Hey, did you hear
about your friends in Pennsylvania?

89
00:05:51,414 --> 00:05:53,939
Rumor has it that the Scranton branch is...

90
00:05:54,017 --> 00:05:55,348
Really?

91
00:05:55,619 --> 00:05:57,109
Wow, that's bad.

92
00:05:58,722 --> 00:06:01,316
Sorry. Scranton branch is closing?

93
00:06:02,125 --> 00:06:03,752
In your face.

94
00:06:05,195 --> 00:06:06,856
Well, I work here now.

95
00:06:06,930 --> 00:06:08,295
Sucker.

96
00:06:14,804 --> 00:06:15,998
Are you okay?

97
00:06:16,072 --> 00:06:20,304
Yeah, great, amazing.
Best physical condition of my life.

98
00:06:20,810 --> 00:06:22,141
What did Jan want?

99
00:06:22,212 --> 00:06:24,373
Nothing. Just checking in.

100
00:06:26,249 --> 00:06:28,308
I can't tell you, so...

101
00:06:28,618 --> 00:06:29,744
What can't you tell me?

102
00:06:29,819 --> 00:06:31,582
Nothing, Pam.

103
00:06:32,155 --> 00:06:34,521
What difference does it make?
We'll all be gone in a few weeks anyway.

104
00:06:34,591 --> 00:06:36,058
What?
What?

105
00:06:36,126 --> 00:06:38,185
You just said that we're gonna be gone?
Do I have any messages?

106
00:06:38,261 --> 00:06:39,785
Michael, what's going on?

107
00:06:39,863 --> 00:06:40,989
I don't know.
What did Jan say to you?

108
00:06:41,064 --> 00:06:42,531
Was she mean to you?
Nothing. No, she...
109
00:06:42,599 --> 00:06:44,123
Okay. Okay.

110
00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:45,224
(CLEARING THROAT)

111
00:06:45,302 --> 00:06:47,793
Listen up, everybody, I have some news.

112
00:06:49,572 --> 00:06:50,903
(SIGHING)

113
00:06:51,541 --> 00:06:55,841
All I can do right now is put on a brave face
and go out there and be their leader.

114
00:06:55,912 --> 00:06:57,072
It's over.

115
00:06:59,115 --> 00:07:00,946
We are screwed.

116
00:07:01,751 --> 00:07:03,616
Dunder Mifflin Scranton is being shut down.

117
00:07:03,687 --> 00:07:09,284
Michael, we shouldn't be talking about this
until all the decisions have been made.

118
00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:13,188
You knew about this all along, didn't you?

119
00:07:13,263 --> 00:07:16,164
Jan told me just a few minutes
before she told you.

120
00:07:16,232 --> 00:07:18,325
Traitor. You are a traitor.

121
00:07:18,401 --> 00:07:20,528
What about us, Michael?
Do we still have jobs?

122
00:07:20,603 --> 00:07:22,833
I don't know. Probably not.

123
00:07:24,307 --> 00:07:26,138
This is the <i>worst!</i>

124
00:07:33,450 --> 00:07:36,283
So this has been <i>great!</i>

125
00:07:37,887 --> 00:07:40,651
So let's get back to work
and do the best job that we can.

126
00:07:41,424 --> 00:07:44,120
Toby, I'd like to see you in my office, please.

127
00:07:44,194 --> 00:07:45,593
All right.

128
00:07:49,332 --> 00:07:51,892
Oh, my God. You walk so slowly.

129
00:07:59,275 --> 00:08:01,368
It makes perfect sense
that it would happen today.

130
00:08:01,778 --> 00:08:04,508
Because I just received this in the mail.

131
00:08:04,881 --> 00:08:08,442
A thousand business cards
with this address and phone number.

132
00:08:08,752 --> 00:08:11,585
I don't want to blame anyone in particular.

133
00:08:11,654 --> 00:08:13,485
I think everyone's to blame.

134
00:08:13,656 --> 00:08:18,116
If I get to stay and Ryan is laid off,
I will kill myself.

135
00:08:18,828 --> 00:08:22,264
Like <i>Romeo</i> + <i>Juliet.</i> The Claire Danes one.

136
00:08:22,432 --> 00:08:24,593
Stamford, <i>Connecticut!</i>

137
00:08:25,702 --> 00:08:27,363
Stamford, <i>Connecticut!</i>

138
00:08:27,437 --> 00:08:29,200
What happened?

139
00:08:29,272 --> 00:08:32,173
I think the word got out about Scranton.

140
00:08:33,777 --> 00:08:38,305
Hey, do you know any more details on that?
Like, is... Am I transferring here?

141
00:08:38,381 --> 00:08:40,110
You know, nothing's definite.

142
00:08:40,183 --> 00:08:43,346
In fact, you know what...
Excuse me, everyone.

143
00:08:43,553 --> 00:08:48,013
I know there are some rumors going around,
but nothing is definite. All right?

144
00:08:48,558 --> 00:08:51,049
You guys have done a great job
getting our numbers up around here.

145
00:08:51,127 --> 00:08:54,290
But until this thing is official,
let's just keep working, huh?

146
00:08:54,364 --> 00:08:56,195
You know, be professional.

147
00:08:56,266 --> 00:08:59,793
Ladies and gentlemen,
our fearless leader, Josh <i>Porter!</i>

148
00:09:00,103 --> 00:09:02,037
Josh, take a bow. Take a <i>bow!</i>

149
00:09:02,705 --> 00:09:07,142
I think it would be kind of weird
if everyone from Scranton came here.

150
00:09:07,343 --> 00:09:10,107
It'd be like going
to your high school reunion

151
00:09:10,180 --> 00:09:11,841
and you saying, "Hey, I missed you guys."

152
00:09:11,915 --> 00:09:13,439
And then they're all like,
"Oh, don't worry about it.

153
00:09:13,516 --> 00:09:15,882
"We're all going to move in with you

154
00:09:16,019 --> 00:09:17,350
"forever."

155
00:09:22,492 --> 00:09:23,618
Yeah.

156
00:09:23,693 --> 00:09:25,991
Hey.
Meredith, hello.

157
00:09:26,629 --> 00:09:28,494
Tough day?
Yes.

158
00:09:28,798 --> 00:09:34,236
So, listen, I know you're seeing someone,
but I'm still willing if you are.

159
00:09:34,771 --> 00:09:36,238
What willing?

160
00:09:36,372 --> 00:09:38,363
You remember. Like six years ago

161
00:09:38,441 --> 00:09:41,706
we said that on our last day of work
that we would

162
00:09:42,912 --> 00:09:44,311
sleep together.

163
00:09:46,583 --> 00:09:47,880
God.

164
00:09:50,887 --> 00:09:52,445
I did not say that.

165
00:09:53,256 --> 00:09:56,692
Was that not you?
No. Not me.

166
00:09:59,195 --> 00:10:00,719
Never mind.

167
00:10:03,666 --> 00:10:05,827
The day just gets worse and worse.

168
00:10:06,202 --> 00:10:10,866
<i>PAM: It's a blessing in disguise.</i>
<i>Actually, not even in disguise.</i>

169
00:10:11,407 --> 00:10:14,171
In my fantasy,
I always thought I would slap someone,

170
00:10:14,244 --> 00:10:16,940
make a big speech and storm out forever.

171
00:10:18,381 --> 00:10:19,905
But this is good, too.

172
00:10:19,983 --> 00:10:21,780
You're kidding?
No.

173
00:10:21,851 --> 00:10:23,648
What does that mean?

174
00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:28,054
Well, some of us are fired,
and a few are going to Connecticut.

175
00:10:29,425 --> 00:10:32,053
Do you guys know who's going where?
176
00:10:32,161 --> 00:10:34,755
Don't worry. You're going to be fine, Roy.

177
00:10:34,831 --> 00:10:38,323
You're very strong and capable.

178
00:10:39,769 --> 00:10:40,895
ROY: Thanks.

179
00:10:42,405 --> 00:10:43,929
Oh, grow up.

180
00:10:44,440 --> 00:10:46,738
I don't want to work here without Pam.

181
00:10:47,410 --> 00:10:51,471
It'll just be like loading trucks
without any meaning, you know.

182
00:10:52,415 --> 00:10:53,939
<i>STANLEY: I couldn't be happier.</i>

183
00:10:54,017 --> 00:10:57,418
<i>I'm gonna take the severance and retire.</i>
<i>My wife and I are gonna travel.</i>

184
00:10:58,121 --> 00:11:00,521
I really couldn't be happier.

185
00:11:03,660 --> 00:11:05,594
Feeling nostalgic?

186
00:11:06,062 --> 00:11:07,654
Yeah, nostalgic.

187
00:11:19,876 --> 00:11:23,539
DARRYL: Hey, Mike.
Darryl. Noble Darryl.

188
00:11:25,582 --> 00:11:28,073
Look, I heard about the office. Tough break.

189
00:11:28,151 --> 00:11:32,053
I know, I know. Well, I'll land on my feet.
Yeah.
190
00:11:32,121 --> 00:11:34,021
Don't worry about me.
I wasn't.

191
00:11:34,090 --> 00:11:38,083
So you'll be okay, too.
You're a warrior, you're smart, capable.

192
00:11:38,161 --> 00:11:39,856
You'll find something else and...

193
00:11:39,929 --> 00:11:42,898
Actually,
Bob Vance bought out the warehouse.

194
00:11:42,966 --> 00:11:46,129
So he's keeping on the whole crew,
so we're good.

195
00:11:47,470 --> 00:11:48,698
Awesome.

196
00:11:48,771 --> 00:11:50,602
This is my house.

197
00:11:50,673 --> 00:11:53,471
The CFO's taking away my house
and giving it to Josh.

198
00:11:53,543 --> 00:11:56,637
And Josh is giving the garage to Bob Vance.

199
00:12:01,918 --> 00:12:03,351
All right. Listen up.

200
00:12:03,419 --> 00:12:07,378
Some of you may have heard
some rumors about the branch closing.

201
00:12:07,991 --> 00:12:09,583
Like when you said the branch was closing?

202
00:12:09,659 --> 00:12:13,425
But I am not going to take this lying down.
203
00:12:13,496 --> 00:12:15,760
I have a plan,
and I am going to save our jobs,

204
00:12:15,832 --> 00:12:16,821
so just hang in there.

205
00:12:16,899 --> 00:12:17,957
Let's go.
<i>Yes!</i>

206
00:12:18,034 --> 00:12:19,899
Oh, good, you're bringing Dwight.

207
00:12:19,969 --> 00:12:22,699
Yes. This might get ugly
and we need backup.

208
00:12:24,173 --> 00:12:25,470
What's the plan?

209
00:12:25,541 --> 00:12:28,101
We go to New York, confront the CFO.

210
00:12:28,177 --> 00:12:30,077
Show him he's making a mistake,
save the branch.

211
00:12:30,146 --> 00:12:31,909
Can I drive?
No way.

212
00:12:31,981 --> 00:12:34,279
<i>Shotgun!</i>
No, there's no one else.

213
00:12:34,350 --> 00:12:35,578
Still...

214
00:12:37,954 --> 00:12:39,012
Thank you very much.

215
00:12:39,088 --> 00:12:41,818
Okay, secretary says
Wallace is away for the day
216
00:12:41,891 --> 00:12:43,222
and won't be coming back into the office.

217
00:12:43,292 --> 00:12:44,418
Okay. Okay.

218
00:12:45,361 --> 00:12:51,322
But do not worry.
I have his home address right here.

219
00:12:51,534 --> 00:12:52,967
Why?

220
00:12:53,036 --> 00:12:54,401
Christmas card list.

221
00:12:54,470 --> 00:12:56,995
You send him cards? You've never met him.

222
00:12:57,073 --> 00:12:59,701
But when I do,
we'll have something to talk about.

223
00:13:02,478 --> 00:13:05,106
Hey, do you have a second?
Sure, what's up?

224
00:13:05,181 --> 00:13:06,671
I know it's not definite or whatever,

225
00:13:06,749 --> 00:13:10,310
but do you know
who's coming over here from Scranton?

226
00:13:11,187 --> 00:13:12,552
I honestly don't... I don't know.

227
00:13:12,622 --> 00:13:15,455
Okay, so is it like Sales or accountants or...

228
00:13:15,525 --> 00:13:18,289
You know what, Jim?
I wouldn't worry about it.

229
00:13:18,361 --> 00:13:19,828
What does that mean?

230
00:13:19,896 --> 00:13:20,954
<i>Hi!</i>
JOSH: Jan, hey.

231
00:13:21,030 --> 00:13:24,488
Oh, good, you're both here.
Ready to talk logistics?

232
00:13:25,668 --> 00:13:28,569
I just feel like
it could have been something special

233
00:13:28,638 --> 00:13:30,799
if we could have kept working together,

234
00:13:30,873 --> 00:13:35,037
but I'm gonna go someplace else,
and you're gonna go someplace else.

235
00:13:36,412 --> 00:13:38,107
It just doesn't make sense.

236
00:13:38,314 --> 00:13:40,680
This kind of worked out perfectly for me.

237
00:13:40,750 --> 00:13:42,183
I got some good experience,

238
00:13:42,251 --> 00:13:44,981
Michael's gonna write me
a great recommendation.

239
00:13:45,922 --> 00:13:48,482
And as far as me and Kelly goes,

240
00:13:49,759 --> 00:13:51,727
I think it's for the best.

241
00:14:00,903 --> 00:14:03,838
<i>Okay!</i> This is <i>it!</i>

242
00:14:03,906 --> 00:14:08,400
This is exactly what Michael Moore does.
Famous documentarian.
243
00:14:09,145 --> 00:14:11,579
He goes up to people with a camera

244
00:14:11,647 --> 00:14:15,014
and he's like, "Why did you do this?
Why did you pollute?

245
00:14:15,084 --> 00:14:18,542
"You are bad, you're a bad person."
It's very dramatic.

246
00:14:18,654 --> 00:14:21,350
Although I can't say I was a big fan
of <i>Bowling for Columbine.</i>

247
00:14:21,591 --> 00:14:25,254
Because I thought it was gonna be
a bowling movie, like <i>Kingpin.</i>

248
00:14:30,166 --> 00:14:32,760
And it wasn't. It was something else.

249
00:14:35,438 --> 00:14:40,102
So Josh will be running
what is now called Dunder Mifflin Northeast,

250
00:14:40,176 --> 00:14:42,371
which is all the offices north of Stamford.

251
00:14:42,445 --> 00:14:45,243
And, Jim, if you want the job,
you'll be his number two.

252
00:14:45,314 --> 00:14:47,407
<i>Wow!</i> Sure, absolutely.
Awesome.

253
00:14:47,483 --> 00:14:50,782
Excuse me, Jan, I'm sorry,
I'm gonna have to stop you there.

254
00:14:51,821 --> 00:14:54,016
I will not be taking the job.

255
00:14:54,123 --> 00:14:56,489
What... Excuse me... Why not?

256
00:14:56,559 --> 00:15:00,791
As of today, I have accepted
a senior management position at Staples.

257
00:15:02,198 --> 00:15:03,358
Today?

258
00:15:04,467 --> 00:15:07,732
You leveraged your new position with us
into another offer?

259
00:15:08,070 --> 00:15:10,265
Damn it, Josh,
this whole restructuring thing

260
00:15:10,339 --> 00:15:12,739
was based around keeping you. I...

261
00:15:13,476 --> 00:15:16,001
I'm sorry, all right. It's done. It's done.

262
00:15:16,078 --> 00:15:19,411
I gotta make some calls.
Excuse me, I'm sorry, Jim.

263
00:15:22,218 --> 00:15:26,712
Say what you will about Michael Scott,
but he would never do that.

264
00:15:29,091 --> 00:15:33,152
Okay.
All visible points of access are covered.

265
00:15:33,696 --> 00:15:36,927
So, do you know what you're going to say
when he shows up?

266
00:15:36,999 --> 00:15:39,058
I will improvise. I will speak from the heart.

267
00:15:39,135 --> 00:15:42,593
No. Bad idea. You need an attack plan.

268
00:15:42,672 --> 00:15:45,732
Here, I'll be him, you be you. Let's practice.

269
00:15:46,275 --> 00:15:48,209
Okay.
All right.

270
00:15:48,811 --> 00:15:49,835
(SCATTING)

271
00:15:49,912 --> 00:15:52,210
Coming home from work.
Excuse <i>me!</i> Mr. Wallace?

272
00:15:52,281 --> 00:15:54,408
David Wallace?
Yes. What is the meaning of this?

273
00:15:54,483 --> 00:15:57,884
Can you tell us
why you are shutting down Scranton

274
00:15:57,954 --> 00:16:00,718
and putting 15 people out of work?

275
00:16:00,790 --> 00:16:03,088
Well, the branch is no longer
financially viable.

276
00:16:03,159 --> 00:16:04,217
It's simple dollars and cents.

277
00:16:04,293 --> 00:16:07,626
Yes, but these are employees, sir.
These are human beings.

278
00:16:07,697 --> 00:16:09,597
Listen, Scott.

279
00:16:09,665 --> 00:16:12,862
It's no longer financially viable.
We're losing money, okay?

280
00:16:12,935 --> 00:16:16,393
It's not a charity, it's a business.
And it's a dying business.

281
00:16:16,539 --> 00:16:18,905
Look, the whole business model

282
00:16:18,975 --> 00:16:21,443
of the small, regional paper company
simply doesn't make sense anymore.

283
00:16:21,510 --> 00:16:24,445
Stop. Stop it, just...
Okay, he's not gonna say any of that.

284
00:16:24,513 --> 00:16:27,880
Well, hey, why not?
Because he'd be intimidated, and I just...

285
00:16:27,950 --> 00:16:30,714
Let's start again.
Just be more scared of me, okay?

286
00:16:30,786 --> 00:16:32,515
Don't touch me this time.

287
00:16:32,588 --> 00:16:33,748
(SCATTING)

288
00:16:34,023 --> 00:16:35,547
Excuse me, Mr. Wallace?
Coming home from work.

289
00:16:36,125 --> 00:16:38,218
Pam, would you please sign
my company directory.

290
00:16:38,294 --> 00:16:39,852
Are you serious?

291
00:16:40,429 --> 00:16:41,953
Sure.

292
00:16:51,207 --> 00:16:53,801
"Kelly. Best wishes. Love, Pam."

293
00:16:55,044 --> 00:16:56,272
"P.S.

294
00:16:56,979 --> 00:16:59,709
"What a long, strange trip it's been."

295
00:17:09,425 --> 00:17:12,258
So, we are still scrambling here,

296
00:17:12,328 --> 00:17:16,196
but it looks like
Scranton is going to absorb Stamford.

297
00:17:16,299 --> 00:17:17,288
Wow.

298
00:17:17,366 --> 00:17:20,199
And I know that you just left there
a couple months ago,

299
00:17:20,269 --> 00:17:23,432
but we would like to offer you
the number two position at that branch.

300
00:17:23,506 --> 00:17:25,064
Thank you.
Yeah.

301
00:17:25,541 --> 00:17:28,567
No, it's just I'm not sure if I...

302
00:17:28,644 --> 00:17:30,202
Well, to be quite honest with you, Jan,

303
00:17:30,279 --> 00:17:33,942
I have a few unpleasant memories
of Scranton and...

304
00:17:35,017 --> 00:17:36,075
Michael.

305
00:17:36,152 --> 00:17:39,781
<i>No!</i> No, no, just some personal stuff.

306
00:17:39,855 --> 00:17:43,052
And I'm not really ready
to revisit that, I don't think.

307
00:17:45,494 --> 00:17:47,689
Well, please think about it.
308
00:17:47,763 --> 00:17:51,221
And call me, we will do whatever we can
to get you to stay.

309
00:17:51,300 --> 00:17:52,528
Okay.

310
00:17:59,275 --> 00:18:02,108
Hey, Meredith, how're you holding up?
I'm fine.

311
00:18:02,178 --> 00:18:03,645
Hey, did we ever have a conversation

312
00:18:03,713 --> 00:18:05,943
about doing something
on the last day of work?

313
00:18:06,015 --> 00:18:07,346
Does that ring a bell?

314
00:18:07,416 --> 00:18:08,713
No. I don't think so.

315
00:18:08,784 --> 00:18:13,346
Do you remember hearing a rumor about me
and anybody, last day of work...

316
00:18:13,422 --> 00:18:14,787
Something sexual?

317
00:18:15,891 --> 00:18:17,290
No.

318
00:18:18,027 --> 00:18:19,289
Okay.

319
00:18:22,431 --> 00:18:24,695
I'm kind of okay with it, actually.

320
00:18:25,301 --> 00:18:28,429
Oh, that's good. That's great.

321
00:18:30,406 --> 00:18:32,670
Do you know what you're going to do then?

322
00:18:33,042 --> 00:18:35,169
Well, you know, I've got art school.

323
00:18:35,244 --> 00:18:38,543
Oh, that's... Yeah, of course.
You should totally do that.

324
00:18:38,681 --> 00:18:39,773
That's a great idea.

325
00:18:39,849 --> 00:18:40,838
Yeah.

326
00:18:42,485 --> 00:18:46,319
I am. Already. I started a while ago.

327
00:18:48,257 --> 00:18:51,158
Wow, that's terrific.

328
00:18:52,328 --> 00:18:53,693
That's awesome.

329
00:18:55,097 --> 00:18:56,564
Well, cool.

330
00:18:58,601 --> 00:19:00,398
I'm glad you're doing that.

331
00:19:02,304 --> 00:19:04,829
You can learn a great deal about a man
from his trash.

332
00:19:07,376 --> 00:19:09,139
Case in point.

333
00:19:09,678 --> 00:19:11,703
Satellite TV bill.

334
00:19:11,881 --> 00:19:14,247
Lesson learned? He's rich.

335
00:19:17,953 --> 00:19:19,648
Coffee grounds.
336
00:19:20,322 --> 00:19:22,790
Was he enjoying a delicious, hot beverage?

337
00:19:23,059 --> 00:19:28,258
Or disguising the scent of cocaine
from drug-sniffing dogs?

338
00:19:30,666 --> 00:19:32,099
It's a nice house.

339
00:19:33,969 --> 00:19:38,099
Hey, guys, I'm trying to organize
a little group lunch for everybody

340
00:19:38,174 --> 00:19:41,007
since, you know,
we're never gonna see each other again.

341
00:19:41,077 --> 00:19:42,203
Where are we going?

342
00:19:42,278 --> 00:19:44,303
I thought maybe Dee Jay's?

343
00:19:45,314 --> 00:19:46,838
How about Cugino's?

344
00:19:46,916 --> 00:19:48,941
I don't want to go all the way to Dunmore.

345
00:19:49,018 --> 00:19:50,542
How about Cooper's, then?

346
00:19:50,619 --> 00:19:52,280
No seafood.

347
00:19:52,354 --> 00:19:54,618
But I don't wanna go to Dee Jay's.

348
00:19:54,690 --> 00:19:56,317
Oh, now all of a sudden you get picky?

349
00:19:56,392 --> 00:19:58,622
Okay. Forget it.
350
00:20:00,529 --> 00:20:01,996
Hooters.

351
00:20:02,064 --> 00:20:03,088
No.

352
00:20:03,232 --> 00:20:05,029
$400 for the CPU.

353
00:20:05,568 --> 00:20:06,557
Done.

354
00:20:17,780 --> 00:20:19,907
Here, replenish your fluids.

355
00:20:29,458 --> 00:20:30,925
Where's Michael?

356
00:20:30,993 --> 00:20:33,723
He's not here. I don't know where he is.

357
00:20:34,797 --> 00:20:36,196
Wait...

358
00:20:38,067 --> 00:20:39,557
What's going on here?

359
00:20:39,635 --> 00:20:42,695
We know the branch is closing.
Michael told us.

360
00:20:43,472 --> 00:20:47,169
Oh, God. Okay. You know what, everybody?

361
00:20:47,243 --> 00:20:48,767
I'm sure there's a better way to do this,

362
00:20:48,844 --> 00:20:50,471
but I've driven
something like 400 miles today,

363
00:20:50,546 --> 00:20:53,344
and I'm completely exhausted,
so I'm just gonna tell you.
364
00:20:53,415 --> 00:20:56,145
Your branch is not closing.
Stamford is closing.

365
00:20:56,418 --> 00:20:59,512
For the time being,
it seems that all of your jobs are safe.

366
00:20:59,588 --> 00:21:01,419
Yes.
<i>Yes!</i>

367
00:21:02,358 --> 00:21:03,586
<i>Stanley!</i>

368
00:21:03,893 --> 00:21:07,056
Is it because of Michael?
Did he actually do something?

369
00:21:07,129 --> 00:21:09,359
Well, reasons are not important.

370
00:21:09,431 --> 00:21:12,161
Would you just call him, please,
wherever he is and tell him.

371
00:21:12,234 --> 00:21:15,931
Sure. Jan, do you know,
is anyone coming back to Scranton?

372
00:21:16,038 --> 00:21:17,630
Back?
Coming to Scranton.

373
00:21:17,706 --> 00:21:19,537
Is anyone coming to Scranton?

374
00:21:19,608 --> 00:21:22,475
You know, we don't know. Probably a few.

375
00:21:31,687 --> 00:21:34,281
Maybe we should take a break,
get some food.

376
00:21:34,356 --> 00:21:36,153
Negative. We could miss him.

377
00:21:36,225 --> 00:21:38,352
I'm really hungry.
Yeah, me, too.

378
00:21:38,694 --> 00:21:40,525
(MOBILE PHONE RINGING)

379
00:21:41,463 --> 00:21:43,624
Who is it?
The office.

380
00:21:43,699 --> 00:21:44,961
Are you gonna get it?

381
00:21:45,034 --> 00:21:48,299
No, not until I have some good news
for them.

382
00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:52,901
Not until I have some good news.

383
00:21:54,443 --> 00:21:56,035
(SCATTING)

384
00:21:57,813 --> 00:22:00,213
Dunder Mifflin Action News.

385
00:22:00,282 --> 00:22:03,877
Jim Halpert, will Big Tuna
be transferring to Scranton?

386
00:22:04,753 --> 00:22:06,050
I don't know.

387
00:22:06,655 --> 00:22:09,055
Jan offered me the job,
but I haven't really decided yet.

388
00:22:09,124 --> 00:22:12,992
Yeah. Well, even if I don't get transferred,
I'll probably be fine.

389
00:22:13,896 --> 00:22:17,662
Cornell has an extensive
alumni network, so...

390
00:22:18,867 --> 00:22:20,164
We look out for each other.

391
00:22:20,769 --> 00:22:22,600
I'll probably go back and teach
or something.

392
00:22:23,572 --> 00:22:25,301
Where'd you go to college?

393
00:22:26,375 --> 00:22:27,467
Cornell.

394
00:22:29,712 --> 00:22:30,838
That's good.

395
00:22:33,515 --> 00:22:36,040
I guess some new people
might be coming from Stamford.

396
00:22:36,118 --> 00:22:38,382
Which should be fun. New blood.

397
00:22:38,587 --> 00:22:40,214
Is Jim coming back?

398
00:22:40,556 --> 00:22:44,287
That's... I hadn't thought about it.
I don't know.

399
00:22:45,394 --> 00:22:48,227
I just don't want it to be weird, you know.

400
00:22:49,198 --> 00:22:52,395
I mean, I took his old job and his old desk.

401
00:22:52,468 --> 00:22:54,993
Yeah, you know, that might be weird.

402
00:22:55,604 --> 00:22:58,300
Overall, though, we still all have our jobs,

403
00:22:58,374 --> 00:22:59,466
so good news, right?

404
00:22:59,541 --> 00:23:00,599
Oh, yeah, totally.

405
00:23:00,676 --> 00:23:01,768
(YELLING)

406
00:23:01,844 --> 00:23:05,109
I am so happy
we don't have to break up now, <i>Ryan!</i>

407
00:23:06,782 --> 00:23:08,147
It is the best day of my whole <i>life!</i>

408
00:23:09,818 --> 00:23:11,217
I don't know.

409
00:23:12,621 --> 00:23:14,088
I can't explain it.

410
00:23:22,197 --> 00:23:23,562
What are you gonna do?

411
00:23:23,632 --> 00:23:27,432
I really don't know.
How you doing with all this?

412
00:23:27,503 --> 00:23:31,496
You know, I'm fine.
I'll be better when I know if I have a job.

413
00:23:32,474 --> 00:23:34,271
You'd actually move to Scranton?

414
00:23:34,343 --> 00:23:36,470
Yeah, if they let me, I think I would.

415
00:23:36,545 --> 00:23:39,844
New York City is 45 minutes
down the road from here.

416
00:23:40,316 --> 00:23:42,614
And you wanna move to Scranton.

417
00:23:43,519 --> 00:23:45,851
I don't know, if I were you,
I'd move to New York.

418
00:23:47,389 --> 00:23:51,985
Yeah, you know, I might do that. I might...
Who knows? I might do that.

419
00:23:55,631 --> 00:23:57,462
(GRUNTING)

420
00:24:00,536 --> 00:24:01,764
<i>God!</i>

421
00:24:03,105 --> 00:24:04,436
JOSH: Hey, <i>Andy!</i>

422
00:24:04,740 --> 00:24:05,968
What's up, Josh?

423
00:24:06,041 --> 00:24:07,838
I just wanted to say thanks, good luck.

424
00:24:07,910 --> 00:24:09,935
Thanks, man, you, too, totally.

425
00:24:11,747 --> 00:24:13,908
<i>STANLEY: Oh, well. What can you do?</i>

426
00:24:14,183 --> 00:24:17,619
It was nice to have those few hours
when I thought it was over.

427
00:24:17,686 --> 00:24:20,382
Now, I have something to look forward to.

428
00:24:21,990 --> 00:24:24,356
Hey, Creed. Congratulations.

429
00:24:24,426 --> 00:24:26,724
Thank you. I made like 1,200 bucks.

430
00:24:27,096 --> 00:24:28,461
(PHONE RINGING)

431
00:24:28,831 --> 00:24:30,992
Meredith Palmer.
<i>MAN: Hey, gorgeous.</i>

432
00:24:31,266 --> 00:24:32,324
Who's this?

433
00:24:32,401 --> 00:24:35,393
<i>Gary Trundell from the old days</i>
<i>who worked in the warehouse.</i>

434
00:24:35,471 --> 00:24:36,495
Oh, hey.

435
00:24:36,572 --> 00:24:37,561
<i>Hey, gal, listen.</i>

436
00:24:37,639 --> 00:24:39,573
<i>I heard through the grapevine</i>
<i>that your branch is closing.</i>

437
00:24:39,641 --> 00:24:42,667
<i>That got me to thinking about our deal.</i>
<i>Remember?</i>

438
00:24:43,011 --> 00:24:44,774
Oh, yes.

439
00:24:45,647 --> 00:24:48,138
Well, actually, the branch is...

440
00:24:48,951 --> 00:24:51,715
Can you be at my place in 20 minutes?
<i>Yes, I can.</i>

441
00:24:53,889 --> 00:24:55,413
Anything?

442
00:24:55,591 --> 00:24:56,580
Nothing.

443
00:24:58,394 --> 00:25:03,491
What if this doesn't work?
What if the office actually goes under?

444
00:25:05,234 --> 00:25:08,169
Then it was an honor
to have worked with you.

445
00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:19,640
All right.

446
00:25:20,249 --> 00:25:25,585
Favorite moments in Dunder Mifflin history.
Go.

447
00:25:25,988 --> 00:25:31,392
My first day when you hazed me
by spraying me with the fire extinguisher.

448
00:25:34,229 --> 00:25:36,288
That was hilarious. The foam.

449
00:25:38,934 --> 00:25:40,526
My first sale.

450
00:25:40,602 --> 00:25:43,093
My promotion to
assistant regional manager.

451
00:25:43,572 --> 00:25:45,597
Our basketball game.

452
00:25:47,743 --> 00:25:50,109
And when you took me to the hospital

453
00:25:50,846 --> 00:25:52,643
and told me that you cared about me.

454
00:25:52,714 --> 00:25:56,514
All right, okay, that's enough, that's good.

455
00:25:58,487 --> 00:26:00,512
What were your favorite moments?

456
00:26:02,691 --> 00:26:07,321
All of them. I loved them all.
Every single one of them.

457
00:26:09,298 --> 00:26:11,596
What about when Jan said
the branch was closing?
458
00:26:11,667 --> 00:26:14,067
God, Dwight.
Well, it...

459
00:26:16,839 --> 00:26:20,036
Hey, Pam, we're going to Poor Richard's.
Creed's buying shots.

460
00:26:20,108 --> 00:26:21,871
No thanks, guys.
All right.

461
00:26:21,944 --> 00:26:23,434
Have fun, though.
Cool.

462
00:26:23,512 --> 00:26:25,537
Hey, I hear Jim's coming back.

463
00:26:25,614 --> 00:26:27,081
Really? Where'd you hear that?

464
00:26:27,149 --> 00:26:28,548
Hey, Ryan, you coming?
Well, I was...

465
00:26:28,617 --> 00:26:29,914
Yeah, we'll meet you there.

466
00:26:29,985 --> 00:26:31,509
Awesome. Let's go, Phyll.

467
00:26:31,587 --> 00:26:34,021
I'll tell you later.
Okay.

468
00:26:34,389 --> 00:26:35,481
Hey.

469
00:26:36,258 --> 00:26:37,350
Bye.

470
00:26:40,529 --> 00:26:41,689
Crazy day, huh?
471
00:26:41,763 --> 00:26:43,196
Yeah.
Yeah.

472
00:26:43,999 --> 00:26:45,091
Man.

473
00:26:48,103 --> 00:26:52,301
I'm really glad
you're still gonna be working here.

474
00:26:53,675 --> 00:26:55,142
Yeah, me, too.

475
00:26:56,378 --> 00:26:59,575
I mean, it'd be a pain
to have to find another job, so...

476
00:27:00,349 --> 00:27:02,408
Yeah, totally.

477
00:27:08,156 --> 00:27:10,181
All right, I'll see you.
Okay.

478
00:27:11,460 --> 00:27:14,361
<i>PAM: I was expecting a severance,</i>
<i>some time off.</i>

479
00:27:14,796 --> 00:27:17,424
But maybe this is good.

480
00:27:18,100 --> 00:27:20,034
Finding another job is a pain.

481
00:27:21,036 --> 00:27:23,698
<i>There's another annoying boss,</i>
<i>another desk.</i>

482
00:27:23,772 --> 00:27:26,297
<i>I'd have to learn everything all over again.</i>

483
00:27:27,309 --> 00:27:31,439
So, there are reasons to stay.

484
00:27:40,923 --> 00:27:44,654
Hey, I think I am gonna take that job.

485
00:27:44,893 --> 00:27:48,727
And Scranton, it's not that bad.

486
00:27:48,931 --> 00:27:52,560
So, if they offer you a job there,

487
00:27:53,535 --> 00:27:55,002
I think you should take it.

488
00:27:56,238 --> 00:27:58,672
Okay, yeah, maybe I will.
Okay.

489
00:27:58,740 --> 00:28:01,140
Yeah, I'm happy he said that.

490
00:28:01,209 --> 00:28:04,007
I mean, I don't think he's into me
or anything,

491
00:28:05,414 --> 00:28:09,748
but I'm kind of into him, so there you go.

492
00:28:16,758 --> 00:28:20,922
What are we still doing here? It's over.

493
00:28:22,264 --> 00:28:25,028
Let's go home. Get the car.

494
00:28:28,937 --> 00:28:32,168
Oh, this was such a stupid idea.

495
00:28:32,274 --> 00:28:35,243
This was so stupid.

496
00:28:35,310 --> 00:28:39,838
I am such a stupid idiot.
I let everybody down.

497
00:28:39,915 --> 00:28:43,874
Everybody hates me.
I lost everybody's <i>jobs!</i>
498
00:28:45,320 --> 00:28:46,947
Nobody likes me <i>anymore!</i>

499
00:28:47,022 --> 00:28:49,217
DWIGHT: Oh, my <i>God!</i>
What?

500
00:28:49,291 --> 00:28:52,283
Stamford is <i>closed!</i>
Michael, we're not <i>closed!</i>

501
00:28:52,794 --> 00:28:54,523
Stamford is <i>closed!</i> Stamford is <i>closed!</i>

502
00:28:54,596 --> 00:28:56,723
Is it? We did <i>it!</i>
We did <i>it!</i>

503
00:28:57,165 --> 00:28:59,065
We did <i>it!</i>
You did <i>it!</i>

504
00:28:59,801 --> 00:29:01,132
We did <i>it!</i>

505
00:29:02,638 --> 00:29:03,832
We did <i>it!</i>
<i>Yeah!</i>

506
00:29:03,905 --> 00:29:05,338
We did <i>it!</i>

507
00:29:05,974 --> 00:29:07,874
Right <i>here!</i> Right <i>here!</i>

508
00:29:08,110 --> 00:29:09,543
(BOTH EXCLAIMING)

509
00:29:11,680 --> 00:29:13,739
Yeah, <i>baby!</i>
In your <i>face!</i>

510
00:29:15,617 --> 00:29:17,608
We did it.
Oh, <i>man!</i>
511
00:29:19,621 --> 00:29:21,316
How did we do it?
I don't know. I have no idea.

512
00:29:21,390 --> 00:29:23,119
I don't understand.

513
00:29:24,793 --> 00:29:27,785
<i>TOBY: Well, for a minute there,</i>
<i>I saw myself selling my house,</i>

514
00:29:27,863 --> 00:29:30,696
<i>moving to Costa Rica, learning how to surf.</i>

515
00:29:30,866 --> 00:29:33,300
But Costa Rica will still be there

516
00:29:35,837 --> 00:29:37,361
when I'm 65.