SYNOPSIS))PART)ONE)

It's% Robert's% birthday.%He's% 35,% he% lives% in%New% York% City% and% he's%
single.%His% friends,%most% of% them%
married%and%all%of%them%couples,%have%gathered%at%his%apartment%to%give%him%a
%surprise%party%%a%party%
Robert%knows%about%thanks%to%a%careless%message%leX%by%one%of%his%friends,%the
%neuro@c%Amy.%Robert%
tries%to%blow%out%the%candles,%but%they%stay%lit.%It's%ok,%someone%cries,%he%s@ll
%gets%his%wish.%What%was%
his%wish?%Nothing.%Not%even%to%be%married%%his%married%friends,%these%good%and
%crazy%people,%are%all%
he%needs%%"Company".%
What%follows%is%a%series%of%vigne[es%featuring%Robert,%his%friends%and%his%lovers.%
Harry)and)Sarah)
Sarah%has%been%studying%karate,%and%Robert%implores%her%to%demonstrate%a%throw%or
%two.%She%does%so,%
on%Harry.%He%tries%to%counter%and%they%are%soon%thrashing%about%in%violence%that
%may%or%may%not%be%
playful.% The% caus@c% Joanne,% the% oldest,% most% cynical% and% most]oXen%
married% of% Robert's% friends,%
watches% and% observes% that% it% is% "The, Li/le, Things, You, Do, Together", that
% make% a% marriage% work.%
Robert% asks% Harry% if% he% ever% regre[ed% ge^ng% married.% He% answers,% and%
the% other% married% men%
concur,%that%you%are%always%"Sorry9Grateful",%and%that%marriage%changes%both
%everything%and%nothing%
about%the%way%you%live.%
Peter)and)Susan)
Peter%and%Susan%seem%like%a%perfect%couple%%he's%Ivy%League,%she's%a%southern
%belle,%and% they%love%
each%other%very%much.%Robert%innocently%flirts%with%Susan,%telling%Peter%that%if
%they%ever%break%up,%he%
wants%to%be%the%first%to%know.%Well,%they%reply,%he's%the%first%to%know.%They're
%ge^ng%divorced.%
Jenny)and)David)
The%couple%grill%Robert%on%why%he%hasn't%married%yet.%It's%not%like%he's%opposed%to
%it.%He's%looking.%In%
fact,%he's%found%three%lovely%young%women%he%is%currently%fooling%around%with.%The
%women%%Kathy,%
Marta%and%April%%appear%and%proceed%to%berate%Robert%for%his%reluctance%to%commit
%"You,Could,Drive,
a,Person,Crazy".%%
Everyone%it%seems%is%trying%to%pair%Robert%off%with%someone,%and%each%of%the
%deeply]envious%men%has%
found%someone%perfect%for%a%night%of%pleasure%or%two%"Have,I,Got,a,Girl,For,You".%
%But%Robert%is%happy%
to% put% off% anything% like% that% for% a% while.% He's% wai@ng% for% someone,%
she's% out% there% % somewhere%
"Someone,is,WaiDng.%
The)Girlfriends)
Robert% meets% his% three% girlfriends% on% three% separate% occasions% as% Marta%
sings% of% the% city:% crowded,%
dirty,%uncaring%and%wonderful%"Another,Hundred,People".,
Amy)and)Paul)
Amy% and% Paul% have% lived% together% for% years,% but% are% only% now% ge^ng%
married.% Amy% is% in% an%
unprecedented%state%of%panic%and%outlines%an%impressive%list%of%reasons%why%she%is
%not%"GeHng,Married,
Today".% Robert,% the% best% man,% and% Paul% watch% as% she% self]destructs% and%
finally% just% refuses% to% go%
through%with%it.%Paul%dejectedly%runs%out%into%the%rain%without%a%coat.%Robert
%tries%to%comfort%Amy,%but%
ends% up% proposing% to% her:% "Marry% me% and% they'll% all% leave% us% alone!"%
His% words% jolt% Amy% back% into%
reality,%and%she%runs%out%aXer%Paul.%Back%at%the%birthday%party,%Robert%is%given
%his%cake%and%tries%to%blow%
out%the%candles%again.%He%wishes%for%something%this%@me,%someone%to
%"Marry,Me,a,Li/le",praying%for%
an%easy,%no]strings%marriage.%
SYNOPSIS))PART)TWO)
At%the%party,%Robert%blows%out%his%candles%again.%This%@me,%he%manages%to%blow%half
%of%them%out%and%
his%friends%have%to%help%him.%The%couples%share%their%views%on%Robert%with%each
%other,%comments%that%
range%from%complimentary%to%unfla[ering,%as%Robert%reflects%on%living%in%threes
%"Side,By,Side,By,Side",%a%
turn%soon%followed%by%the%up]tempo%tribute%to%Robert's%role%as%the%perfect%friend
%"What,Would,We,Do,
Without,You?".%%
Robert)and)April)
Robert%brings%April%to%his%apartment%for%a%nightcap%aXer%a%date.%Meanwhile,%the
%married%women%worry%
about%Robert.%He's%lonely,%they%say,%he%needs%a%woman.%A%real%woman,%someone%like
%them,%not%the%girl%
he's%with%now,%who%couldn't%be%more%wrong% for%him%"Poor,Baby".%When%Robert%and
%April%go% to%bed,%
Kathy%appears%and%performs%a%dance%to%"Tick9Tock".%The%next%morning,%April%has%to
%be%on%Flight%18%to%
"Barcelona", in% a% few% hours.% Robert% makes% the% customary% false% pleas% for%
her% to% stay,% and% for% some%
inexplicable%reason%the%pleading%works%and%she%does.%Robert%is%less%than%pleased.%
Peter)and)Susan)
Robert%takes%another%girlfriend,%Marta%this%@me,%to%visit%Peter%and%Susan%who%are
%now%divorced.%Peter%
flew% to%Mexico% to% get% it% and% it% was% so% nice% there% Susan% joined% him%
for% a% vaca@on.% They're% s@ll% living%
together%as%they%have%too%many%responsibili@es%to%split%up%and%their%rela@onship
%has%been%strengthened%
by%their%divorce.%%
Joanne)and)Larry)
Joanne% and% Larry% take% Robert% out% to% a% nightclub.% Joanne% raises% her%
glass% in% a%mocking% toast% to% "The,
Ladies,Who,Lunch",%a%song%judging%rich%middleaged%women%who%waste%their%lives
%doing%meaningless%
ac@vi@es.%However,%at%the%end%of%the%song,%Joanne%realises%she%is%the%worst%Lady
%Who%Lunches%of%them%
all.%Larry% takes% Joanne's%drunken% rant%without%complaint%and%explains% to%Robert
% that%despite% the% fact%
she's%so%abusive,%or%maybe%because%of%it,%he%loves%her%dearly.%%
Robert% finally% confronts% the% five% couples.% Why% get% married,% he% cries.%
What% do% you% get% from% it% but%
someone%to%smother%you%and%make%you%feel%things%you%don't%want%to%feel?%But%his
%arguments%pale%and%
he%finally,%finally%wishes%for%someone%to%share%his%life%with,%someone%to%help%and
%hurt%and%hinder%and%
love,%someone%to%face%the%challenge%of%"Being,Alive",with.%
Back%at% the%opening%party,%his% friends%waited% two%hours,%but%Robert%hasn't%shown
%up.%Finally,% they%all%
get% the% message% and% go% home,% wishing% their% absent% friend% a% happy%
birthday.% Robert% appears% alone,%
smiles%and%blows%out%his%candles.%
B