Table of Contents

Introduction ............................................................................................... 1

Self-Worth ................................................................................................. 2

Metta Meditation ....................................................................................... 3

Affirmations............................................................................................... 4

Inner Smile Meditation.............................................................................. 4

Changing Negative Thought Patterns ..................................................... 5

Visualization .............................................................................................. 6

Be Open To Opportunities ....................................................................... 7

Act As If ..................................................................................................... 7

Be Grateful ................................................................................................ 8

Believe In Yourself .................................................................................... 8

Create Balance .......................................................................................... 9

Have Fun ................................................................................................... 9

Grow Into Wholeness ............................................................................. 10

Final Thoughts ........................................................................................ 11

Disclaimer: This publication is for informational purposes only and is not intended as
medical advice. Medical advice should always be obtained from a qualified medical
professional for any health conditions or symptoms associated with them. Every
possible effort has been made in preparing and researching this material. We make
no warranties with respect to the accuracy, applicability of its contents or any
omissions.
Introduction
Have you ever heard it said that People never change? Have you ever found yourself wishing
that, If only other people could be a little moreor a little less? In other words, have you ever
found yourself wishing that other people could change to suit you? You probably know already
that, as hard as I may be at times, you simply cannot change other people; however, there is
much that you can do to change yourself. In fact, the only person you can change is you! You
dont have control over other people, but you can learn to attain mastery of yourself.

If you could focus on changing yourself, what would you wish to change? Would it be your
tendency to procrastinate, for example? Or your feelings of loneliness?

Are you unhappy with certain aspects of your life?

Perhaps you wish to attract a partner but you feel
unworthy, or too fat, too short, too drab or
unexcitingMaybe youd like to lose 20 pounds but
you keep repeating the same trip to the refrigerator
and sabotaging your efforts, by reaching for the ice
cream tub.

Would you like to develop more positive friendships, but you feel anxious meeting people?

Do you long for success but youre stuck in a dead-end job?

Do you wish you had a different job but fear of change is holding you back?

Would you love to be your own boss but fear of failure is holding you back?

Do you find yourself making the same mistakes repeatedly and feeling hopeless and helpless?

Do you suffer from bouts of depression and cant imagine finding happiness?

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Whatever it is, you dont like about yourself, or aspects of your life, there are so many ways you
can take steps to change yourself for the better. Real change is possible for you!

Here are some of the ways you can begin to feel better about yourself. When you feel better
about yourself then you are going to act in a more positive way. Acting in a more positive way
will cause different reactions in those around you and will draw more positive results and
circumstances to you. When you change yourself for the better then your life changes for the
better also.

Self-Worth
Underlying much of your dissatisfaction with yourself is very likely a deeply held belief that you
are unworthy. This is an almost universal belief that develops in early childhood and most of us
hold this belief to some extent, whether we are
aware of it or not. It is up to you to learn how to
love yourself in adult life. Knowing the belief of
feeling unworthy is a common one and that
almost everyone holds this belief might help you
to put it into perspective.

You are not alone, and there is nothing wrong

with you. This belief just shows you are part of the
human race. It will determine the health of your self-esteem. Unless you take steps to transform
this belief, it will keep on running the show and causing you to feel dissatisfied with yourself.
Building up your own sense of self-worth and self-esteem is essential to improving your life. This
is the foundation upon which your life is built and your success or failure ultimately springs from
here.

Learning to love yourself is one of the greatest gifts you can give to yourself. It will change your
life. We can be very hurtful to ourselves, where we would not dream of harming another person
in such a way. We may use critical and condemning language to speak to ourselves. We may put

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ourselves down. This is a form of self-harm. It keeps us in pain. It contributes to depression,
unhappiness, and isolation. It makes us feel badly about ourselves and causes us to spiral down
into a pit of negativity. It is much better to learn how to be gentle to yourself, to treat yourself
with loving kindness and compassion. Here are some ways you can learn how to do that:

Metta Meditation
One of the ways you can learn to do this is to learn Metta meditation. Metta meditation is a
Buddhist meditation, but you do not have to be a Buddhist to practice it. It is a kind of
meditation technique which develops the capacity for feeling warmth, compassion and goodwill,
firstly towards yourself, and then towards others. It
can be used by anyone, regardless of spiritual or
religious affiliations.

First, you learn how to break down the barriers to

loving yourself, through softening and soothing the
attitude of the mind. When you have developed
greater love and compassion towards yourself, then
you have something to offer outwards to others in the world. This is a practice of unconditional,
pure love. It is not attached to outcomes, does not seek to possess another, and does not
depend on what other people think of us.

The essence of this meditation is like this:

May I be well,
May I be happy,
May all things be well with me.

Then you say it for someone you feel neutral about, then for someone you love, then for
someone for whom you feel dislike or other negative emotions. After that, you radiate loving
kindness out towards all beings. Then you can radiate loving kindness out to the whole planet
and even to the whole universe.

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Affirmations
Affirmations are positive, present tense statements using the first person, or I, that you say
repeatedly. They help to establish new neural pathways in the brain. A great one to use to help
yourself change for the better is this: I am great! I am a master!

This affirmation can help you excel in anything! The jazz pianist Kenny Werner used it to help
him in his musical aspirations. He said it helped in so many other areas of his life, too. (Read his
book, Effortless Mastery). When you
feel great, like a master, you start to act
great, like a master. Then other people
notice you hold yourself taller, and they
start to treat you with more respect. And
so on.

Another wonderful way to develop self-love and self-worth is through the practice of the inner
smile meditation.

Inner Smile Meditation

The inner smile meditation is an ancient Taoist technique that changes how you feel about
yourself after just a few minutes. Use it any time you are feeling stressed and it rapidly brings
you to a place of peace, calm, and joy! Mantak Chia is a Taoist master who teaches this
technique. Here is a short version to get you started:

Imagine a benevolent being smiling at you.

See the energy of their smiling eyes penetrate your own eyes. Instantly feel yourself start to
relax. Lift the corners of your mouth up slightly and feel your own smile.

Allow the smiling energy (you can picture it as a golden color) to penetrate the brain. Feel the
brain absorbing this wonderful tranquil, nourishing energy.

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Send the inner smile down to the heart. According to Mantak Chia, the heart is the only organ
that can generate Love. Imagine the heart generating a lot of pink, Love energy. Send this to the
other internal organs, one by one: the stomach, spleen, and pancreas; the lungs and large
intestines; the liver and gall bladder; the kidneys and bladder. (Picture these as best you can;
better yet, look at an anatomy book and learn
about them).

Eventually, radiate this Love energy through all

the cells in your body, and into the atmosphere
around you. You can send it out to all the people
on earth and to the planet itself.

Finally draw that energy back in and condense it

into the point below your navel, and the center of your power, the Tan Tien.

Notice how you feel. A bit different from before you started? An increase in feelings of
happiness? This is because, as Master Mantak Chia himself states, Love heals.

Changing Negative Thought Patterns

This is an important tool to overcoming self-sabotage. Without weeding out some of the more
persistent core beliefs, it is hard to move on and move forward, and live a life of happiness and
contentment. We tend to stay stuck in the same subconscious patterns.

Once we learn how to change our negative beliefs, however, it can have massive and far-
reaching positive repercussions on our lives. It is a good idea to find a skilled therapist to help
you do this, preferably one who uses a body-centered approach, as previous traumas become
stuck and show up either as physical symptoms from muscular tension to headaches, bowel
dysfunction and nervous tics, or as mental and emotional symptoms such as depression, anxiety
and low self-esteem.

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As clinical counsellor Ella Morelle says, It is possible to discover and release very early childhood
wounds with this process. Once we recognize that old coping mechanisms no longer serve us, we
can instruct the subconscious mind to let go of old belief patterns, and replace those with newer,
more empowering and healthful ones. This can have a very beneficial effect on our overall health
and well-being.

Visualization
Olympic athletes and highly successful business people use
visualization techniques to help them achieve and exceed
their goals and expectations. Visualization is the art of
picturing, in vivid detail, the successful outcome of your
goal.

By using your imagination to see in great detail the

outcome youre looking for, you begin to create new
neural pathways in the brain, that cause you to behave in a
certain way, according to the images you have been
reinforcing.

There is plenty of neuroscientific evidence nowadays to back up the validity of visualization.

Imagine your ideal outcomes in as much detail as you can, including colors, sounds and
sensations, feelings, emotions and so on. Especially try to experience as fully as possible the
feeling state of the outcome. Practice several times for a few minutes, daily.

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Be Open To Opportunities
Wealthy entrepreneur Richard Branson is successful because he has a knack for seeing
opportunities. Not only does he notice opportunities when they arise, but he is then ready to act
on them in the moment. He strikes while the iron is hot and is not afraid to take risks.

A wilderness survival technique is to use a soft visual focus. Known as owl eyes in some
outdoor survival circles, it is the ability to scan with a wide-open, slightly unfocussed view,
keeping the peripheral vision in awareness. Our Western tendency is to focus on a narrow, single
point. In this way, our eyes become hardened and stressed. We miss out on a lot of information
in this way.

A lot of solutions present themselves to us when

we keep a soft, wide-angled vision. It helps us
relax, yet stay alert, and open to opportunities.
Solutions come to you effortlessly when you
employ this technique. Try it and see for
yourself.

Act As If
Fake it till you make it is a way to hasten the manifestation of your goals. If you act confidently,
people will respond to you as if you are confident, and will treat you accordingly with respect
and admiration. Remember what happens when you stay small? Do people even notice you?
Chances are you are getting what you want: to be hidden and stay invisible. This probably served
you well for some good reason as a small child, but now you need to develop different and more
productive strategies. Staying small no longer serves you. Act as if you are confident, wealthy,
and successful and the world will treat you in kind.

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Be Grateful
The art of gratitude is a miraculous practice that will open doors in ways you never thought
possible. To start, at the end of each day, write down 10 things you are grateful for. This will
increase your sense of gratitude. Be sure to languish in the feeling of gratitude.

The more you can experience the feeling of being thankful, the more gratitude will work
wonders in your life. When you start to really experience the feeling of gratitude, you start to
feel happy. Feeling truly happy is a great blessing and a true sign of success. (Whats the point of
having lots of money and status if you are miserable?

Cultivate happiness no matter where you are at in your life.) Make a habit of giving thanks for
successful outcomes, even before they have happened. When you have the inner conviction that
things have already turned out well for you, you radiate an energy of competence and calm and
positivity; this attracts to you the very forces that lead you to your successful outcome.

Cultivating gratitude puts you into one of the highest emotional states you can experience. It will
bring you feelings of real joy, abundance, and contentment, no matter how much or how little
you have in terms of material belongings. Once you have the feeling of gratitude, you then
naturally attract more to be grateful about. It truly is a most amazing practice.

Believe In Yourself
Having a deep inner conviction in your own abilities is one of the best ways you can feel good
about yourself. Change your negative thoughts so that you can believe more strongly in yourself.
You will be able to accomplish more than you would have dreamed of before you learned to love
yourself. When you believe you can, then you probably can! It is when you believe you cannot
that you really limit yourself and hamper the accomplishment of your desires.

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Create Balance
It is very important in terms of your health and well-being that you try to maintain a balance. A
balance, which is, between work and play, fun and seriousness, solitude and community, down
time and up time, and so on. Too much of a good thing becomes problematic. Make a list of all
your good and bad qualities, notice where you excel, and give yourself credit for that. Notice
where you lack discipline, motivation, or desire, and commit to changing your negative beliefs
around those areas, and then taking action to implement change. For instance, perhaps you hate
mornings.

You find getting out of bed so difficult that when you finally do, you discover you are running late
for work. This then colors your whole day with a negative slant. You want to change this
behavior. What is your belief? Maybe you have a core belief that The world is against me, or
Life is hard. Whatever it is, it is critical to your success that you transform this into a positive
statement such as, The world is my oyster, or Every day brings me untold joy and happiness.

Once you can start to feel the happiness inherent in the new belief, you can then take actions to
change your old, unhelpful habit. Set your alarm 20 minutes earlier. Start your day with a short
meditation or visualization. Do five minutes of stretching and then give thanks for as many things
as you can think of. Notice how your day unfolds differently because of these new actions.

Have Fun
It is so easy to lose sight of the importance of having fun. With work and responsibilities of family
and so on, life can feel like a heavy burden at times. Be sure to find ways to weave laughter into
your life. Laughter helps you create feel-good endorphins and a real hearty belly laugh actually
exercises your abdominal muscles! Try laughter yoga, comedy shows, and doing fun stuff with
friends who make you smile. Life is meant to be enjoyed, and when you are having fun, you
automatically feel better about yourself.

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Grow Into Wholeness
What you focus on increases. Therefore, if you focus on the negative stuff, you get more
negative stuff. If you focus on the positive stuff, you get more positive stuff! Jung talked about
the process of individuation. What he meant by this was becoming fully whole, in and of oneself:
a complete human being empowered and fulfilled. Practice some of the techniques outlined
above and you will grow, in maturity, in positivity and in grace. You will become more loving,
towards yourself and towards others. You will, over time, grow into a mature, responsible, and
fulfilled individual filled with kindness, gratitude, and optimism. Remember, what you focus on
increases!

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Final Thoughts
No matter how you want to change yourself for the better, with commitment, dedication, and
practice, it can be done. Remember the affirmation I am great; I am a master! and make it
your daily mantra in all that you do.

Change your thoughts from negative to positive

and practice feeling the emotions and the felt
senses of the positive outcome you long for. If you
long for weight loss, imagine how great you will
feel, how light and energized, how strong and fit
and youthful. Imagine how people will react to
you differently and how you attract compliments
and admiring glances. Imagine it as though it has
already happened. Your visualizations and
affirmations will create new neural pathways in the brain, causing a chain reaction of different
habitual responses, which will lead to you getting the results you are looking for.

The bottom line in all of this is the art of learning to love yourself. Practice ardently to be gentle
and kind to yourself. Love yourself unconditionally. Build a new relationship with yourself based
on compassion and loving kindness.

Above all, forgive yourself.

All the other changes you long for stand a much greater chance of materializing when you learn
to love yourself first. The more you love yourself, the more you will love your life, and the more
love you will have to share with others too. The more you love yourself, the more you will allow
yourself to receive the wonderful gifts life has to offer, just because you know you are worth it.

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