GODDESS OF SEX

Drive your man crazy

All the Keys and Secrets to Sex, Sensuality and Passion.

Pseudonym: Dylan Summers

I dedicate this book to you:

..........................................................

Goddess of Pleasure, Sex,

Sensuality and Passion. Because everything
you need is inside you. I will glad to help you get that
Great Goddess inside you.
 CONTACT

saraburillomoliner@gmail.com

Author`s Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SaraBurilloMolinero?fref=ts

GODDESS OF SEX: Drive your man crazy

Sara Burillo

© 2017 Sara Burillo

Translation: Julia Simandan

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be produced., stored in a retrieval system, or
transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or
otherwise, without the prior permission of the owner of copyright.

AUTHOR'S BOOKS:

→ How to attract, seduce, captivate and influence others

→ Anxiety, Somebody help me!!

→ Discover your talent and make it your business

→ Kybalion: Discover the Law of Attraction

→ Oral Sex “Dylan Summers”

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Sara Burillo was born in a village in the province of Burgos, Spain. There she
was raised and grew up till she moved to Marbella (province of Malaga),
where she would spend her final adolescent years and adult life. Her career
in Psychology aroused her passion to help others overcome their problems.
She has done a lot of Pro research to find new therapies in different fields,
among others; anxiety, stress, depression, fear of speaking in public, bring
out hidden talents, the search for happiness, the art of influencing others,
techniques to make new friends and keeping mental stability in any area or
ambience. Now she is embarked on issues such as chronic pain, sexual
disorders, tinnitus and works related to spirituality, as well as improvement in
self esteem, just to mention a few. The versatility of this author brings us to
the current spiritual questions from an introductory book to Kybalion and the
keys that make up the Law of Attraction.

COMPLIMENTS:

I am mainly grateful to Julia Simandan, my dearest translator, her time and

magic she projects; because without her it would not have been possible to
sell the books that today I have translated into the English language, and
because she is a person who has managed to stay in my mind even through
the passage of time, because without realizing it she makes people love her.
All other compliments go to my parents, my brothers and sisters and friends;
even though the most special part of this goes directly to my loyal
companion, my already older four legged canine called Arquímedes; who
accompanies me day and night, bearing my own monologues while I decide
which information is worthwhile, and who makes me take walks and breathe
in the air from the woods of my hometown so as to analyze all the
information that I write and that of which I will write later on. Without him,
the ideas would not flow the way they do, and the books surely would not
even have half of the magic that I try to achieve for you, my dear reader, so
that they can serve their purpose from hereon.

COMPLIMENTS TO THE READER: It is here when I say to you, reader,

not only do I want to speak to you of the gratitude I feel for you, but also
something more. I want to tell you that you are the link to each and every one
of my thoughts that were channeled. If you would not exist, this book would
not have been created. So, read it as what it is, a written creation specifically
and with all my love and tender care for you; with the hope that you enjoy
while reading it and that it can serve in part or completely so you can be as
happy as you wish to be...Thank you for existing.

INDEX

1.- What does giving pleasure to a man exactly mean?

2.- Erogenous parts of the Male Body

3.- Excitement through the Eyes

4.- Excitement through Smell
5.- Excitement through Touch

6.- Excitement through Sound

7.- Excitement through Taste
8.- Excitement through Sensations

9.- Finding the hidden Tastes

10.- How to play with a man`s mentality according to our physical body
11.- Various Rolls

12.- Ways to get out of the routine

13.- Truths and Myths
14.- Premature Ejaculation

15.- Erectile Dysfunction

16.- Delayed Ejaculation: how to finish in a short time
17.- Things that should never be told to a man
18.- Te importance of innovation
19.- Perfect Masturbation

20.- Pandora`s Box: Fellatio (Oral Sex)

21.- The Masculine G-Spot

WHAT DOES GIVING PLEASURE

TO A MAN EXACTLY MEAN

“Sex is communication. It is giving pleasure to another person to produce

pleasure to ourselves”.

Dalmiro Sáenz

One of the things that concerns us most when it comes to having a sexual
encounter –whether it is with our partner or someone we've just met– , is to
succeed in making the other person feel pleasure with what we're doing to
them. Maybe we're inexperienced and we're attacked with doubts such as “I
don't know if I'm doing it well”, will they have an orgasm?, etc. Or perhaps,
in spite of us already having an advanced technique, we want the sexual
experience to be something unforgettable for the other person and enjoying it
like never before.
For these reasons and many more, there are a lot of people interested in
learning what they should do, how, when and where, to produce the
maximum pleasure to the other person. But what exactly is pleasure? Many
might think that pleasure is an orgasm in itself, the ejaculation. However, that
is only the end of it, one of many signs of reaching ecstasy. Pleasure, on the
other hand, is the whole thing that one experiences along the way till they get
to that “precious goal” called “orgasm”.

Although the saying says “all roads lead to Rome”, not all roads lead to an
orgasm. However, we have the possibility to do it from many and different
ways. Each of our five senses can be compared to one of them. And not only
that, but also, the majority can move at the same time in the case of pleasure.
They offer us such a considerable amount as well as abundant in
opportunities to stimulate an aspect of our partner, whether it is through sight,
smell, touch, hearing or taste.

The combination of these five senses, together in our imagination, will create
a variety of pleasant atmospheres, which at the same time will be different for
each person due to their experiences, sensations, sensitivities, etc. The most
important thing that we should bear in mind is, the most important sexual
organ is the brain. If we know how to get to our partner's thoughts, we'll
succeed in taking them to the highest and purest ecstasy. Stimulating them
with fantasies, games and advances, as well as using the five senses in the
most intelligent way taken to the animal/instinctive realm, it's vital to get the
other person to feel like the rest of the world doesn't exist around them in the
most intimate moments.

In this manual, we'll get to the best and most profound conclusions to make
our man melt in bed and never forget who we are and what we're capable of
accomplishing. In the following chapters, several aspects to bear in mind will
be detailed to get a man to die of pleasure, as much as before as during the
sexual relations, as well as afterwards remembering the encounter through
thought. This will produce an intense predilection in future meetings. This
way we succeed to catch his interest.
 2

EROGENOUS PARTS
OF THE MALE BODY

“Sex is one of nine reasons for reincarnation... The other eight aren't
important”.

Henry Miller
If they asked us for an erogenous area of the man, the majority of us women
would surely think it's the penis. It seems that only this exists. Nevertheless,
the man has dozens of sensitive areas that could give us a lot of pleasure if
they're well stimulated.

HAIR

A head massage could be a good start. We have a large number of nerve

ends, so, caresses through his hair can produce a feeling of relaxation and
well being, ideal to eliminate the stress that may have accumulated during the
day, and from there move to action.

Back The muscles of the back suffer a lot of pressure throughout the day,
therefore, a good massage would be greatly appreciated. If we don't have a lot
of knowledge on how to do it, we could always recur to simple strokes. Using
body oils or moisterizing creams, and sliding our hands over the back we also
succeed for the man to get a great release.

However, if we feel like going a little further, we can try to give him a more
elaborated massage. We put our hands on both sides of the spine, and with
the help of the creams previously mentioned, we slide our hands in circular
movements, from the upper part of the spine downwards. With our thumb, we
can also use a little more pressure, but without touching the vertabrae, as it
could be annoying and is something that professionals advise against. On
internet there is endless professional and simple information on how to do
good massages, learning to do it effectively and in a short time.

Lastly, if we want to give it an erotic touch, we can undress for the massage.
We can combine that with a kiss on the back or neck, let our hair stroke his
back, our breasts brush his skin...The skin to skin touch arouses the male
instinct, and therefore desire.

LIPS

One of the fastest steps for the man to want to start with action, is to prioritize
our attention on his lips. Kisses is a good way of doing it. It's not surprising
that the majority of sexual relations begin with the stimulation of the lips,
because this area is very sensitive.

We can start in a more sensual way, with little kisses where you can hardly
feel the tongue; and then go changing to a wilder style, inserting the tongue
and then giving more passionate kisses; and if so, we can even try to give a
little bite on the lip. If our man likes to play a little, he'll love it.

But before anything else, we must pay attention to our lips. When lips are
moist and well taken care of they're much more attractive. To do this, we can
use some type of cocoa butter or lip balm that makes them glossy and fresh
looking.

EARS

The ears are another very sensitive area, especially behind them or the lobe.
We can start by stroking behind the ear, and meanwhile, whisper something
alluring, like for example, what we would like to do to him or what we would
like him to do to us. If we can't think of anything, we can also just put our
lips close to his ear and let him listen to our panting breath. The warmth of
our breath in his ear helps to excite him as well.

The next step could be by starting to play with the earlobe: some kisses, soft
bites or, simply, pressing it gently between our lips.

Lastly, depending on the taste of our partner, we can try licking the inside of
his ear: we insert the tip of our tongue and gently move it around in circles.
For some men this can be somewhat unpleasant, so, we shouldn't go ahead
with this unless we know what he likes. If we don't know very well what he
likes, we can ask him in whispers, as mentioned before. This is advisable so
we don't “screw up” and, at the same time, we don't spoil the sexual and
erotic atmosphere that we were creating.
 NECK

Running along the man's body, we must not forget to stop at his neck.
Caressing –or even licking– the area, it excites men as much as it does us.
Some kisses at the nape of his neck, or near the hairline, which will make our
man tremble with pleasure. The kisses should be sensual; for that we can
imagine that we're going to put ice cream between our lips, opening our
mouth and closing it gradually. These same movements on the neck of a man
gradually excites him. We must also be careful with the impulse of giving
him love bites; it may seem exciting to some men –especially when they're
young or passionate–, but after a certain age, it could feel uncomfortable, and
not all of them like it. If we consider doing it make sure it isn't visible the
next day, that way there won't be any problems or regrets. Like you can see
the mark of what happened when you actually want to avoid comments or
looks from others.

CHEST

Next, we go down to the chest. If our man works out, he will surely have a
good chest and so, he'll like us playing around on it. Some stroking, kisses
and admiration would be like a Molotov cocktail so he feels super manly and
wishes to give it all then and there. Our partner will feel satisfied and proud
of his body. However, in case they don't have their chest worked out, we can
also stimulate the chest area, or if we prefer, pass on directly to the nipples.
We can caress them, making small circular movements around the areola;
kiss them, suck on them and licking them; and even bite them gently. Before
that we must be cautious, because there are men who are very sensitive in
that area, and there are even those who with the slightest touch can feel pain.
Therefore, it's advisable to begin very softly or if you like use other parts of
your body to touch. Another option is, once we've licked and kissed his
nipples, we can blow on the moist part; to alter between warm and cold can
be very pleasant.

LOWER ABDOMEN

If we keep going down, we get to the lower abdomen. This area, which is
from the navel to the pelvis, is a very erogenous area. Stimulating with
kisses, strokes and bites, will thrill our man, not only for the fact that it's a
sensitive area, but also because it's so close to the genitals. The man is
already anticipating that next comes oral sex and then he gets extremely
excited. One of the main points to consider is, in his case as well as ours, that
approaches can cause even more pleasure than the direct caressing itself. The
sensation of “here it comes”, “just about, just about”, “I can't anymore”, are
the best expressions to get a man to his peak point. If we succeed to make
him feel like he's dying of pleasure and impatient because we're getting closer
to the “hot” area, we'll succeed in getting the climax to be tremendous. This
happens because these repeated scenes of “I'm coming, but I'm not coming”
make the blood flow or go directly to the genitals, that there's more
excitement on a whole and the entire body is asking for action.

THIGHTS

The same that occurs with the lower abdomen, also occurs with the inside of
the thighs. Any kind of stimulation in this area, produces a noticeable
erection very quickly, being so close to the genitals. We can play at anything
we want with the thighs: kiss them, lick them, bite or suck them. We can
slowly go up towards the genitals (the longer we take in getting there, the
better, and we can even play at getting too close but without actually
touching the “hot” areas and then back to the start); or go on to stimulate the
groin. Anything, but without touching the genitals. The expectation before
the imminent oral sex or centralized fondling, will immerse him in a wave of
lust and passion.

PENIS

And finally, we come to the so highly valued penis. Here we find the most
sensitive area of the man: the glans, which is the end part of the penis. Given
that there are two sections on how to masterbate later on (chapter 19) and
how to do oral sex (chapter 20), where ways to stimulate the penis will be
explained in greater detail, so now let's go on to mention other erogenous
areas.


SCROTUM

When it comes to giving pleasure, one of the great forgotten areas is the
scrotum. This fine skin is the part that covers the testicles. We must be
especially careful playing with this area, as the testicles are extremely
sensitive, and just a very small bump would produce tremendous pain.
However, if they're properly stimulated, it can produce unimaginable
pleasure. We take the scrotal sac in the palm of our hand, and massage them
but without pressure. If we look at the fold that runs from the base of the
penis to the perineum, we can see that it divides the scrotum in two. This line
is extremely sensitive. We can stroke it with the tip of our fingers, and run
them from one point to the other. We can also stimulate it with the tongue,
however, some men don't have this area shaven. In that case, we can give
small strokes with the tongue and skip along this line. By doing this we can
see how our man twists and turns with pleasure.

Another thing that turns some men on a lot is if we stroke the scrotum with
our nails. For that our nails woud have to be slightly long, but especially,
very well groomed, because if they're broken or in bad shape, they could hurt
it.

Depending on the man, sometimes they find it pleasant to stretch the scrotum
or caress this area after slapping the penis gently (carefully and just hard
enough so he feels it as such, but at the same time gentle enough so we don't
hurt it; it's important to keep both things in mind; and it's always best to start
very gently and then asking him sweetly in his ear if he would like it a little
bit stronger).

PERINEUM
The perineum, area between the testicles and the anus, is very close to the
prostate, which is known as the masculine G-spot. The direct way to
stimulate the prostate, would be through the anus just like it'll be mentioned
in a later chapter (chapter 21). However, it can also be stimulated
superficially through the perineum, which equally produces great pleasure as
well.

Just like the scrotum, in this area there may also be hair, so it's up to us as
well if we want to stimulate it with the tongue or with the fingers. The
important thing is to give the maximum pleasure with us feeling just as good
while we're giving it to him. Whichever of the two ways, we must give a little
massage in the area and, at the same time, with a little pressure. If it's done
well, the man will get an erection rapidly, and even reach a state of climax,
which is just before the orgasm. This specific information can be obtained in
a specialized book if we want to discover it to the most experimental and
professional level.

BUTTOCKS

A lot of men get excited when you grab their buttocks while having sexual
relations. Depending on how ardent our man is, he may even like it if we
slightly dig our nails in. To feel so much passion from us makes him feel
desired, which provokes more excitement in him.

---------------

We don't need to stimulate all the areas, nor do exactly what is explained
here. There is no such thing as an appropriate time for each area nor a list
with an order that needs to be followed. Everything depends on each
situation, what the man likes, and what we feel comfortable doing.

One point to bear in mind are his reactions. We have to pay attention to his
face and gestures in each of the things we do to him, which would indicate
whether we should continue or stop, and it would help us set the right
rhythm.

We should never feel obligated or conditioned to do something we don't want

to do, not even when our man asks for it. However, talking about it one can
always come to some kind of agreement between the two. And if there are
any doubts, better consult it with the other person before taking another step
forward that could end up unpleasant.

EXCITEMENT THROUGH THE EYES

“His eyes, two ellipses in the poem of his face”.

Alfonso Orantes
As it's been previously mentioned, each one of our senses offers us a way to
excite our partner. There is a need to be aware of each of the opportunities
that each sense offers us, so as to get the most out of it. As far as the sense
that we're concerned about now, sight is the most striking and direct. So, that
would help us to start seducing from the first moment.

DRESS UP SEDUCTIVELY

One of the points that we should keep in mind to excite a man through the
eyes, is how we dress. You have to be seductive but not to the point of being
too vulgar. For example, if we're going to go out for a drink or dinner, we can
wear a dress with a lower neckline, but not showing too much, just enough to
let his imagination wander. We can also wear a dress that is slightly
transparent or choose soft, rose pink shades, or on the contrary, a striking red
color.

MAKE-UP

Many people recommend us to wear make-up so we look more attractive.

However, some men don't like women who dress up too much; and that
sometimes, “less is more”. So, unless we need to hide some kind of
imperfection, we will limit ourselves to wear lipstick, a little eyeshadow and,
if we like, a little mascara. Looking natural also attracts men.

RED TONES

A research in the University of Rochester, observed that women who wear

clothing in shades of red, turned out more attractive. So, if we have the
chance, we should dress up in a pretty red outfit; it'll keep us within his sight.
We can also use the trick of wearing red shaded lipsticks.

We can apply these tips to our lingerie as well. Use red lingerie, or with slight
transparency, it'll excite our man and he'll feel like continuing to see more of
our things. If we like soft shades, we can choose pale pink, playing at tender
youth resembling our dressing up to the feeling that we can create as
“Lolitas”.

STRIP-TEASE

A good technique for undressing, and that also contributes to increase the
man's sexual desire, is giving like a strip-tease performance. We'll prepare a
warm atmosphere, with reddish tones and low lighting. We can use candles
and leave some of them lit around the room. One thing to remember is that
it's more important to insinuate than show, so let's not show everything at
once. We'll start little by little, and with sensual music in the background. We
can also move in a sexy way, while playing with what we're wearing as we're
removing our clothes. If we think we're capable, we can even accompany the
strip-tease with an erotic type dance. To end it, we can ask him to help us
remove the last piece of clothing, he will gladly co-operate for sure.

ATTITUDE

We can dress provocatively, use make-up or give a hint, but if we do it with

the wrong attitude, it'll be useless. To be attractive, we shouldn't lose eye
contact with our man, no matter what we do. For example, a suggestive look
while we eat, can say a lot more than we think. If we're close, and looking
into his eyes, we can glance up and down at his lips, in a way so he notices it.
This is very indicative that we want to kiss him, so if it isn't what we want,
we shouldn't do it, because he may come straight out and kiss us!

We must be aware of our gestures, the way we walk, insinuating... We must

never cease to be sensual. And if we add a sincere smile while we're looking
into his eyes, we'll have gained a lot.

Lastly, another thing they love, is that women take the reigns, that it is we
who carry the baton. A woman who shows confidence, who is self confident,
might have other flaws, but by then she will already have disarmed the man.
 4

EXCITEMENT THROUGH SMELL

“While you bloom do not forget your orchid flower fragrance”.

Tagami Kikusha

It's always been said that the way to win a man is through his stomach, and it
seems that this premise isn't far off. In a research done by Dr. Alan Hirsch,
from the Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation, it has been
proven that a lot of the aromas that interested men most were those related to
food. In this research, they studied what effect certain aromas had on men,
and how they increased the blood flow towards the penis. For example, it was
observed that the combination of the smell of pumpkin pie and lavander
increased the sexual excitement in men by 40%; the smell of doughnuts with
licorice increased by 30%; and for it's part, the smell of oranges produced an
exciting effect by 20% in men. Other food aromas that were also stimulating
were chocolate, pizza with cheese or popcorn.

But not all of them are food aromas, there are also other aromas that sexually
activate men, like lavander, previously mentioned; vanilla, which was
already used as a sexual stimulant in the 18th century; lily of the valley, of
which it's subtle aroma increases sexual excitement by 11% in men;
cinnamon, also contributes to the increase of the blood flow towards the
masculine genitals; or jasmine, patchouli, and incense.

With all this information, we can come up with a good plan so that, only with
aromas, our man will surrender at our feet. For example, we can think of a
situation where we've invited our man home for dinner. First of all, we must
shower and get ready, right? Well, why not use a lavander or vanilla gel or
shampoo? And for dinner, as a pizza with cheese isn't very romantic, but we
could put out cookies with cinnamon for dessert, or pumpkin pie. To freshen
up the air in the room, it would be nice to use some scented candles (for
example, vanilla, lavander, jasmine, etc.) or incense. And to finish off the
evening, what could be better than melted choclate to play with in bed?

We must keep in mind that this knowledge plays in our favor, but we must
also be careful not to swamp the house with too much scent. It's better to
choose one or two for each thing and not mix them.

As far as perfumes are concerned, it is recommended to use sweeter scents if

we plan on playing a more passive, calmed and peaceful roll; and fresher
scents if we want to adopt a more active roll, where we're in the lead.
However, to use one of the aromas that were mentioned earlier, is also a good
choice. What's more, we know that men love to smell a woman's hair, so if
we have a shampoo or perfume of the same scent, it would be good to
combine them, that way there won't be too many mixed aromas.

EXCITEMENT THROUGH TOUCH

 “Every time I am more convinced that sex is innocence in itself”.

Manuel Puig

It's alIt is somewhat complicated to think of things that can be done to

improve the experience of a man touching a woman. However, if we resort to
our imagination, we can always think of something that could enrich it.

First of all, and even if it's obvious enough, we must bear in mind that a man
loves to feel the soft skin of a woman, so we have to be very thorough when
it comes to removing hair, and also, use a good moisterizing cream so that
our skin is soft and silky.

Besides, we can also use lingerie that are a little out of the ordinary, for
example, silk. The smoothness and sofistication of these garments, provoke a
certain excitement in men. So, if we have the chance, as well as the lingerie,
we can also put satin sheets on our bed. We'd have very good results.

Furthermore, we can embellish our legs with a pair of lacy stockings, we'll
give him a playful hint to the night, and we'll make our man notice that we
have that naughty side that excites them so much. Another alternative is to
use imitation leather clothes. If the lace shows our naughty side, the leather
insinuates that we come like warriors ready for anything, and possibly, that
it'll be us who will take the initiative during the night.

Lastly, as an example, we can play a game that can be used to increase the
sense of touch. We lay our partner on the bed face up, preferably nude. We
blindfold his eyes and, if we want to assume a slightly more dominant role,
we can also tie up his hands. That way, we can assure ourselves that he won't
touch us with them. We start with brushing him with parts of our body across
his lips, and he'd have to guess what it is. We can start with our lips, an ear,
an elbow, a nipple... and wherever our imagination takes us. If we play this
game well, in a few minutes we'll see a noticeable erection in our man.

EXCITEMENT THROUGH SOUND

“Sex is not only putting sex into practice. Just as language is not speech”.

Valerie Tasso

As far as the sense of hearing is concerned, there are several strategies that
can also be of great help to us to seduce a man or increase his excitement at
the time of action.

First of all, even though it may seem like men don't really care about being
told how handsome they are, it's not completely true. Yes, it is true that a
compliment like “you're really handsome” gives them less satisfaction than
when given to a women. However, if you know how to play with words, you
can get a lot out of it. For example, we can praise his physique by saying
something like “you can tell you go to the gym, hey? This sweater tightens on
your arms...”, and we can accompany these words with touching his arm; or
express his good looks by saying “you look really good with a beard, it
makes you look so much more manly”. These compliments, in a more
indirect way than the first one (“you're really handsome”), will make our man
feel proud of himself, and what's more, we make him see that we consider
him attractive.

If we want to be a little playful, we can also use suggestive phrases or with a

double meaning (“I like to take control of the situation”, “I'm very flexible”,
or “I like everything”). But neither should we be too obvious or abrupt, as
that could produce rejection in some men. Depending on the situation, a
simple flirtation, a few sassy or cheeky words, would be enough for our man
to start getting excited. And if we want to go directly to the action, we can tell
him what we like to do in bed or how passionate we are sexually; he won't be
able to resist and will want to please our most carnal desires.

Another thing to bear in mind, are the moans and the sounds produced during
sex. It is well known that men enjoy it much more when we make moaning
sounds. This means that the sounds make them realize that we're enjoyiong it
and, consequently, it shows that they're good in what they're doing. But all
this is not only positive for men; we women can also benefit from moaning,
whispering and sighing. During a whisper, we can let him know what we like
or what we want him to do to us; if he's doing something that we're enjoyng,
we can let him know with more repetitive moans, or tell him things indicating
that he's pleasing us, like “don't stop” or “more”; if there's something we
don't like or he's hurting us, we can complain with a playful phrase; and when
we're reaching our climax, we can intensify our moans. Let's not refrain
ourselves. Another grateful and exciting resource is to scream out his name
while he's giving us pleasure.

However, there are women who don't moan during their sexual relations, or
it's because they refrain themselves or they're the silent type. If it's because
we simply can't express the moans, it doesn't matter, some people are just
calmer than others. What we shouldn't do is fake it. If our man has a minimal
experience with other women, he'll notice when we're faking it, and then the
solution will be worse than the problem. On the other hand, if we refrain the
moans because of embarrassment, we should know that the majority of men
love to hear how their partner enjoys sex, so we shouldn't feel embarrassed!
Let's give in to our impulses.

EXCITEMENT THROUGH TASTE

 “An eternal flavor has been promised to us, and the soul remembers it”.

Leopoldo Marechal

Some experts confirm that aphrodisiac food doesn't exist as such. Which
means to say, there is no food that produces high levels of sexual desire for
it's organic characteristics. However, other scholars sustain that certain foods
produce a vasodilation in our body, as well as being involved in hormonal
processes, that seem to produce sexual desire. Putting this controversy of
authors aside, what is certain is that a great part of aphrodisiac power lies in
the shape and color of the food. Which means, there is a psychological
component that causes some excitement in consuming certain foods, and that
we associate certain foods with sexual elements. For example, strawberries
and cream, remind us of the masculine glans and the sperm; or oysters, which
remind us of the female genitals. Neverthless, whatever the motive, if it
works, why not use it?

As it's already been mentioned before, oysters can be aphrodisiac, besides its
resemblance to the feminine sexual organs, also for it's high content in zinc,
that increases the amount of sperm and the production of testosterone,
therefore increasing sexual desire. Another sexual resemblance is found in
figs, which also contains beta-carotene, a substance that stimulates the
production of hormones and improves sexual desire. The same occurs with
mangos, that as well as containing beta-carotene, it also contains tryptophan,
known as the hormone of pleasure.

Some other fruits that are also considered to be sexual stimulants are:
strawberries, bananas, avocados or watermelons. This last one, has
recently been considered as a “natural viagra”. Watermelons contain,
especially in the white part of the rind, a substance called citrulline, which
relaxes the blood vessels, the same as the medicine that is used for erection
problems.
Cocoa, on its part, stimulates the production of serotonin, which is related to
sexual desire. Another aphrodisiac would be honey, which is rich in vitamin
B, necessary for producing testosterone. Cinammon, on the other hand,
improves the blood supply in the abdominal area, which makes erections
easier. And lastly, asparagus, besides its resemblance to the penis, it contains
vitamins and nutrients that are needed to reach an orgasm.

These are some of the foods that are considered aphrodisiac, however, just
like it's been said previously, it isn't known for certain whether it works a
hundred percent. That's why, we mustn't confine ourselves to the list
provided here. We can use foods that we know our partner likes, since eating
our favorite dish can activate the brain areas associated to pleasure, producing
this way greater sexual impulse.
 8

EXCITEMENT THROUGH SENSATIONS

“The erotic instinct belongs to the original nature of man. It is related to the
highest form of the spirit”.

Carl G. Jung

Once we have discussed the different ways of expressing the possibilities that
each of our five senses offer us, now it's time to talk about how to intensify
the pleasure through the bodily sensations.

One possibility is playing with ice. Before continuing with this, you need to
remember that the best pleasure is focusing on the no-pleasure. Which means,
we're letting our partner know what our purpose is while we're delaying as
long as we like, as he's twisting with pleasure desiring what he's waiting for
is about to happen. Just as we use it for freshness as for the heat it offers, or
any other change, we must use it little by little, going towards the central
areas slowly. The point is to provoke the sensation in the areas during a good
length of time that aren't erogenous, playing at “I'm getting closer, but not
there yet, and I'm moving away”. For example, you can slide the ice
combining it with later licking that area or the next one on the neck, going
further to the chest, the abdomen, and coming to the erogenous areas taking
advantage of the moment when our partner moves asking us to get to where
he wants us to, as we move away again to other parts of the body not so
sexual. It's about not touching the penis, the scrotum, etc. at any time. And
when we do it, we will tease them with soft or light touches, light and short,
just to move away again. Lastly, we can apply it to different erogenous areas
of the body, like for example, a nipple. It will erect with the cold and you
could play around better with it like that. It's then when we can take
advantage and fondle with it, kiss it, or even bite it softly. All these little
games will heat up that area, counteracting the cold that we applied before.

Finally, we can also use the ice on the glans, but not directly, as it's a very
sensitive area and can be painful. The best way is to put a piece of the ice
cube into the mouth and lick it for just an instant. Then, we can lick the glans
and then give him oral sex. The contrast between the cold tongue and the heat
from the penis, will produce a new sensation but a very pleasant one. You
can substitute the ice for an ice-cream or mint candy, this way, besides the
freshness, you can play with the flavor component.

To apply heat, we can resort to candle wax. If we light a candle and then let
some drops of wax fall on our man's body (always remembering to start in
the most distant and highest possible area so we can slowly get closer to the
erogenous areas and finally end up on the sexual ones), those areas where
they fell, will be the most warm ones. When applying heat, the blood
concentrates in that area, making it more sensitive. It's then when we can take
advantage to play with it rubbing it softly with our hands, and kissing it with
our moist lips in a sensual way, like eating an ice-cream when it's running
down on our hand.

To some men this might not be so pleasant because it causes pain. However,
there are other men who find this type of sensation very pleasant. If our man
fits in with the latter description, we can also resort to other games that
produce pain, like twisting or pinching the nipples, bite the thighs, or
slapping his buttocks lightly, and even his penis (in this case being careful of
the intensity and always when it's through the game of being the dominant
one over him).

It's very important to be careful with these kind of games, because pain isn't
pleasant for everyone. And even if it is, you must know where the limits are.
That's why, it's important to talk it over with our man before starting to
experiment, and therefore know what we can do and what not, as well as
playing gradually to discover where his limits are in both pleasure and pain to
avoid.

Lastly, another thing that excites them very much is when we dig in our nails
while they're penetrating us. Although to some men this will produce
unpleasant pain, to others it shows how passionate and unleashed we are;
making them see, just like the moans, that show how we're enjoying it. The
same as with the rest, we must be very clear on the limits and remember that
a little passion of excess is good as long as we don't force the situation or
increase the intensity.
 9

FINDING THE HIDDEN TASTES

“Without prohibitions there is no eroticism”.

Georges Bataille

Every man has sexual fantasies that he longs to satisfy, and would like to
have it fulfilled some time in his life. However, it must be said that many
fantasies are just that, fantasies. Be what they may, we mustn't think of them
as a bad person for not following certain rules in them, let's remember they
are only ways to reach a climax a little sooner. What's more, the majority of
normal people have fantasies that are unimaginable, vetoed, arbitrable and
insane, but none of them are fulfilled in real life, nor any of them as men
would go beyond their imagination. They don't need to be fulfilled. There are
times when satisfying a fantasy, loses its stimulant power, probably because
the essence of unreachable disappears. So, we don't need to insist on
performing each one of the fantasies that overload our partner's head, but we
can use them to play certain games that we know will turn on the passion in
our partner. For example, if we know that his fantasy is to go to bed with a
nurse while she's making an enquiry, why not dress up as a nurse and adopt
that roll?

You must know the fantasies that excite men to be able to use them in our
favor. Having this knowledge permits us to renew the vitality in our sexual
life.

TRIO

One of the things that most turns a man on is watching how two women are
having relations with each other. He may be satisfied with the simple fact of
watching how they're getting excited, but probably, they would like to join in
and participate too. It is here where one of the most widespread fantasies
arise among the heterosexual men: doing a trio with two women.

It's not only the fact of seeing how two women kiss, caress and stimulate each
other mutually, it's for being able to enjoy two women at the same time;
being the man to satisfy them both. These thoughts excite men very much.

It may be that, in the event that this fantasy is fulfilled, and he takes a liking
to it, would want to try sex in a group or take part in orgies. As it's been said
other times, we are the ones who should draw the line up to where we are
willing to try. Maybe we don't even want to include another woman in our
bed, and it would be totally normal, but knowing that our partner would be
excited to do it, we can use other alternatives to calm down those fantasies.
For example, we can go and see erotic shows where these lesbian type scenes
are shown, or watch pornographic movies, and use all that excitement in our
man, to express it later when he's in bed with us.
 PROSTITUTION

Most men with a partner, don't resort to the services of a prostitute,

nevertheless, that fantasy may exist. For a woman, it can be unpleasant to
think that her partner wants to have relations with a prostitute. But men get
excited at the thought of paying a woman to have sex and later disappear,
without having to give any explanations. To have the power, to be in charge,
easy sex and straightforward; that drives a man crazy.

However, in spite of having these kind of fantasies, many men don't go to

prostitutes for fear of getting sexually transmitted infections; and others,
because of knowing that would be considered as infidelity to the partner. So,
a way to satisfy this type of fantasy is that we take on the roll of a prostitute:
that he contacts us, we go to his house, make love, he pays us (symbolically)
and we leave again. It's a much safer way and fun for both.

For some women it might seem degrading to adopt this roll. It's all a matter
of speaking about it with the partner, to know what we are willing to do and
what not. In the event of living with our partner, the idea of leaving after
having had sexual relations, perhaps isn't possible. You don't need to do it
exactly as suggested above, it's just an example. There could be situations
where we could simply do a little acting as if we were a prostitute, which will
serve its purpose; and others, in which we can let our imagination run free
and competely take on the roll. Like it was previously said, that depends on
what we're willing to do.

SEX WITH STRANGERS

In the same line of fantasizing with a prostitute are fantasies in having sex
with a stranger. It's the clear example of sex with no ties. There are no
phonecalls or worries the next day.

This fantasy has an easy alternative to satisfy the partner. We can meet in a
bar, with false names and false personal stories. We introduce each other and
start to chat. Once the passion arises, we go to a room in a hotel and then give
way to madness. Let's not forget that now we're other people, so we mustn't
drop out of our roll. That will excite us a lot more. And once we've finished
each one goes their way.

UNREACHABLE WOMEN

Another of the recurring fantasies among the heterosexual men is of going to

bed with a woman who is difficult to reach, so as not to say impossible. It
could be because they have a power over them, like their boss; or because
they're an authority, like a policewoman or a security agent, or because
having relations with them would be inappropriate, like the wife of a friend,
or his sister-in-law; or lastly, because they're famous.

Some women may get angry that their partners have fantasies with other
women that aren't them, but as it's already been emphasized before, the fact
of having these desires doesn't mean that they're going to do it. It's no more
than a simple stimulant that seems attractive to them and it excites them. In
some cases, little can we do to control it, like the case of our partner gettiing
excited fantasizing with our friend or with his boss. Nevertheless, we can
always use this knowledge and play the trick in our favor. For example, we
can apply the qualities that our man likes so much about these women. If we
focus on the case of his boss, surely he gets excited because she is the one
who has the power over him, why don't we play that roll? Let us be the one in
charge of the relationship for a couple of hours. Let's demand him what we
want to do. Now we're the boss.

EXOTIC PLACES

To always have sexual relations in the same place –normally in bed–, the
same way, same position, same time, and –although it hurts to say it– with
the same person, can be very boring and monotonous for some couples.
That's why, it's not surprising that men like to make love in exotic, public or
forbidden places. Men fantasize that the woman, in an act to satisfy his
uncontrolled passion, throws herself unto him in an ardent sexual encounter,
not caring when or where it is. The fact of having sexual relations in a place
that isn't “so right”, and that it's due to an outburst of passion, excites men
very much.

Some of the places that can work to satisfy these desires are the elevator, the
kitchen, a public restroom, the backseat of a car, a park, movie theater...But
what also must be kept in mind is that in a lot of these places the issue of
exhibitionism has to be considered and the morbidity of getting caught and
seen, with everything that this entails, personally and legally. Perhaps not all
of us want to run these risks, and therefore, it's best to take some precautions
to assure ourselves that we won't be bothered or exposed. For example, if we
decide to have sexual relations in a car, we can go to a more secluded place;
if we feel like doing it in a public restroom, we can go at a time when it's
much quieter; etc. We'll be the ones to decide what behavior we consider
ourselves capable of doing, and what measures to take that we consider to be
appropriate to feel safe and content, in case we decide to do one of these
things.

Another alternative that we can use to satisfy that exhibitionism or that

morbidity because they might be watching us, is recording a video while
we're having sexual relations. It's something much safer that won't have any
kind of consequences, and also, it can be playfully fun for us.

BONDAGE, DOMINATION, SUBMISSION

AND MASOCHISM

(BDSM)

Although there were already many people who were attracted to this type of
practices, as a result of the popularity achieved with books and the movie 50
Shades of Grey, there were a lot of people who have been encouraged to try
it.
First of all, it'll be briefly explained what each of these terms are. On one
hand, bondage is considered like an act when the other person is prevented
from moving, whether it's with tying up or in a symbolic way; domination is
when a person, in an erotic and sexual context, plays the dominant roll over
another person –the submissive one–, with the consent and approval on both
parts; on the contrary, submission, would be the adoption of a passive and
obedient roll to the dominant person, also in a sexual context and with the
consent and approval on both parts; and lastly, masochism would be the
pleasure they feel through receiving pain and being humilliated in a sexual
atmosphere.

These games can bring new changes to bed relations, but you must be very
careful with these types of practices, because it can get out of hand and end
up being very unpleasant for one of the members of the couple. It's best to
casually talk it over about it, and make it very clear just how far we're willing
to go on this and where the limits are. You have to know how to enjoy the
whole range of sexual relations offered to us, but without going over the
limits of integrity and dignity.

Now that this is all said, and going on to practical examples, each member of
the couple can take different rolls depending on the day. We can tie our man's
hands and feet and watch how he twists and turns with pleasure from each
thing that we do to him, without being able move or resist himself. In these
conditions, we can also give him oral sex or sit on top of him while he
penetrates us; he will love it for sure. Or we can be the ones tied up and be
the ones receiving all the pleasure.

If we play a dominant/submissive roll, the dominant person will be the one to

give the orders, the one who says what we're going to do and how they want
to do it. Before you start, the submissive person should've come to an
agreement with the dominant person, and know how far they want to go.
Sometimes, when the submissive person resists or says “no, no” to the
dominant person's orders, it could be part of the game, since it helps to play
the roll and get a higher level of excitement. However, this can also be
dangerous, because it would make it difficult for us to recognize when this
denial is real. That's why, it's convenient to agree on a password, that has
nothing to do with it, (for example, apple) telling them in case they wish to
end the game. That way, both members of the couple can completely enjoy it
without fear of integrity of the other person.

And lastly, to use games where pain is applied, we can resort to candles and
pour part of the hot wax on their body; or clip clothes pins on the nipples; or
simply, slap the buttocks. These practices can serve as a supplement for other
sexual exercises, and therefore achieve a much more complete sexual
pleasure. As we've already said, bearing in mind up to what point we're both
willing to go. Although at first some practices may seem ridiculous or absurd,
the majority of the times after trying them, makes us want to feel it again.
Therefore, it's good not to refuse without knowing what we would feel and if
we'd really like it or not. You can always start with the lowest possible levels
to see if it's something that we'd like, or the contrary, something we'd dislike.

GOING TO BED WITH A VIRGIN

A lot of men dream of deflowering a woman, be “the first” one. The more
angelic, sweeter and more innocent the woman, the better. But this is a clear
example that, at times, some fantasies should stay in our minds, without ever
fulfilling them. And given their lack of experience, the first time always turns
out to leave much to be desired...

Nevertheless, we can use that fantasy to create a new sexual game. We can
play the roll of a virgin: sweet, naive, inoffensive... But what's more, with the
advantage of us having all the knowledge of an experienced woman.

VOYERISM

To get pleasure out of watching how others undress or are having sexual
relations is known as voyeurism. Most men enjoy this type of practice; a
good sample of that is the high consumption of pornography among the
masculine sex. And why not take advantage of enjoying this stimulant with
our man? We can both watch an erotic movie and stimulate each other, and
maybe, the game ends up going on to higher levels.

However, some men don't have enough with just that and need to spy on
couples that are having sex, for example, on the beach. But this can turn into
a problem. In the case of a person only getting excited in this way, could be
considered as a paraphilia (peeping tom), and would need professional help.
Also, the fact of spying on other people's sexual relations could result in legal
and personal consequences, since the other couple did not give their consent
and that is an invasion of their privacy, unless they'd be doing it in public,
where they know they'd be seen.

One way of satisfying these desires without falling into illegal issues would
be to go to places where they practice these types of games. There are places
where couples go who feel excitement when being watched while having sex.
We could both go together and enjoy the experience of watching curiously,
and if the excitement reaches high levels, give in to our passion. If it's not a
practice we accept as morally correct, then we should obviously cross it off
our list. While it's true, we are free to choose whatever practices we like or
excite us, but the more different experiences are tried out, the more we fall
into the hole of needing novelties to be able to enjoy, and that's not the point
we want to reach.

A lot of people due to this point, have stopped enjoying their own sex by not
feeling the situation as being enough for it, where as in the beginning it was
more than enough in itself.

Another alternative is to let our partner watch while we stimulate and

masterbate ourselves. Just the fact of seeing us getting pleasure on our own,
will turn our man on a lot. And if we allow him to join the party or not, that is
for us to decide...
 ANAL SEX WITH A WOMAN

Since men just love what is forbidden, what couldn't be missing on this list is
having anal sex with a woman. For many women this act is vetoed, or even
considered taboo. This only increases the men's desire to cross those lines,
and there's no better charm than what is forbidden.

There's no need in mentioning that a woman is free to decide whether she

wants to do this act or not, she has her reasons. Nevertheless, the point should
be stressed that, if it is done properly, anal sex can be pleasant for both. For
that, first of all, you have to be stimulated and lubricants can help a lot. Once
you're dilated, you can begin with penetrating a finger, then two; and then
gradually increase the size of the object until the penis can be introduced
without hurting.

First of all, let's not forget that, although we want to please our man, OUR
INTEGRITY and our pleasure comes first. A man may disappear out of our
lives just as he came into it, but it's us who have to stay by our own side
always; that's why we must always be very clear about what we want and
what we don't, putting our priorities first before anyone else, including in this,
our man.

FETISHES

Finally, lots of men's sexual fantasies include certain fetishes, like for
instance preference for certain parts of the body, like hands and feet; or for
certain objects, like high heels or their partner's lingerie. To satisfy these
types of fantasies is very easy. It's enough to just play some kind of sexual
game where kissing is involved or stimulation in the hands or feet, when
desire is felt for these parts of the body; or put on high heels while having
sexual relations, if the fetish tends to be towards these objects.
 10

HOW TO PLAY WITH A MAN'S MENTALITY

ACCORDING TO OUR PHYSICAL BODY

“Eroticism is one of the bases of the knowledge of oneself, as indispensable

as poetry”.

Anaïs Nin

The majority of women, have something about their physique that they don't
like. It could be a flaw or simply a complex of a feature on their body. These
“imperfections” create insecurity in a lot of women, which is reflected when
it comes to having relations with others, and more specifically, with the
opposite sex.

So that this doesn't turn against us, and doesn't prevent us from having
satisfacatory personal or sexual relations, we must accept these flaws and also
accept them as a part of ourselves. There are ways to revert these complexes
and use them in our favor.

Each person has their own distinctive characteristics, even though we don't
like some of them. But this shouldn't prevent us from feeling comfortable
with our body. We can take these singularities that define us and use them to
seduce our man, or even to create fantasies and games that help us get into a
state of arousal. For example, we may not like our buttocks, but we may have
long legs or arms –something men love–, well, why not enhance more that
part of the body and put aside what we don't like so much? There's always
some physical characterisic that we can emphasize and stylize to stray the
attention away from what we don't like so much.

One of the worries that most women battle with are the extra kilos (or
pounds). Many women are on constant diets and working out sessions to
achieve that figure they want so much. But what women don't know is that
those extra kilos/pounds don't bother men either. In fact, there's a research
that proved that the majority of the men (3 out of 4) preferred normal weight
in women or slightly plump, instead of the very thin ones. In this same
research it was also observed that a significant number of men were
interested in women that were in their 40's, 50's, 60's age-wise. So, another
fear women have: “not being attractive after a certain age”, which also
doesn't make any sense, when they are very interesting then for many men.
And, what's more, it's already known that experience is a degree, and the
sexual knowledge that these women have, the younger ones certainly don't.

With all this, what is intended here is to make these women see who are
unsatisfied with their bodies, that what for them might be a flaw, for a man
can be a plus. And if not, it's always up to us to turn it into a positive aspect
for us. For example, there are women who may have a complex about the
insufficient size of their breasts. But why not use this feature to create a
sexual fantasy? We can pretend to be young teenagers, who's breasts haven't
quite developed yet. A lot of men would love to have sex with a virgin girl,
we can use our feature and play that roll.
And just like what we can do about our small breasts, the same goes for any
other complex that we have about our bodies. The important thing is to have
resources and imagination to know how to play with our physique. And
above all, to be self confident and believe in ourselves, because that is what
allures a man.

11

VARIOUS ROLLS

“In every erotic encounter there is an invisible character and always active:
the imagination”.

Octavio Paz

Men have a lot of sexual fantasies, and many, you can please by certain roll
playing games. For example, we can play the roll of a prostitute or as a
stranger that you just met, or we can disguise ourselves as someone famous,
or pretend to be a defenseless virgin girl.

All this has already been said in previous sections, but what is meant to be
pointed out here is the fact that the roll games shouldn't be used only to
satisfy other fantasies, but to be used as a sexual attraction in itself as well.
Which means, you don't need to carry out a fantasy to turn to them. A
monotonous evening can turn into the most ardent one if we change the usual
dynamics a little, and one of the things we can add to our bed games, is
playing new rolls.

Normally, identities go in pairs, for example, police-thief, nurse-patient,

boss-employee, etc. Each of the members takes on a roll, one being the
dominant over the other one. Whichever roll each one takes depends on who
wants to be the one in charge during the game. There are couples where the
dominant one is always the same person, and others, on the contrary, change
their rolls.

Some have already been mentioned, but examples will be given as follows to
staging that can be used. A police officer arrests an offender and forces her to
have sexual relations; a patient that goes to a clinic and the doctor/nurse starts
to examine her and, little by little, they get excited so much that they decide
to pass to the action right there and then; a boss who calls one of his
employees in to tell her off for a job done wrong, and she, with the intention
of apologizing, is willing to do anything; a professor who is giving a review
to his student, and while he explains the theme, they brush unintentionally,
they look at each other lustfully and passion breaks loose; a model who lets
herself be photographed in the nude and in provocative poses for an artist, but
gradually, the photographer is getting excited until he ends up making love to
the model; a plumber that goes to fix faulty plumbing at a woman's house and
because of the insinuations and the flirting between both, end up having
sexual relations; etc.

Rolls have been assigned to men and women, but they could be reversed
without a problem. For example, the police officer could be a woman and the
offender a man. And so on, with all the suggested situations. Moreover, it
would be interesting not to always play the same roll, since changing the
perspective would feed the fascination a lot more that the game produces.
And the interactions between characters can also be modified. For example,
the offender can willingly have sexual relations with the officer, fruit of the
heat of the moment; or in exchange, on another day she could be forced by
the officer. However, these dynamics should be talked over before starting
the game. Especially, to know when to stop. And it wouldn't be a bad idea to
have a password to interrupt the game in case any of the two would feel
uncomfortable.

A thousand situations can be created. Any that we can think of and can be
fascinating for us, can be used. Some men get excited when they think of
having sexual relations with ficticional characters, like Princess Leia. Here
each one can let their imagination wander.

12

WAYS TO GET OUT OF THE ROUTINE

 “No matter how you look at it, sex is extremely memorable and satisfying
when things go well. And those who skillfully handle the sexual aspects of a
relationship have a major asset to stimulate romantic love”.

Helen Fischer

Some games have already been mentioned in different sections, nevertheless,

here we will try to name other different ones, so we can have as much variety
as possible.

THE STOPWATCHER (OR TIMER)

This game aims to extend the foreplay as long as we want. It consists in

setting a stopwatch (or timer) so it rings at a certain time, for example, in 20
minutes; and until the alarm doesn't go off, there can be no penetration. The
waiting period will make our excitement build up.

STRIP POKER

If we like table and card games, we can use them for sexual purposes. For
example, we can play strip poker. Everytime someone loses a game, they
have to take off a piece of clothing. As we lose pieces of clothing, we'll be
toning up and our excitement will gradually rise.

DICE

Another game we can play is with dice. There are different variations, but the
most popular one is the one played with two dice: one with parts of the body
on it and the other with actions to be carried out. We throw the dice and see
what luck brings us.

Another variation is to use one dice with positions on it. This option is ideal
if we want to try out new positions. Until we don't throw the dice, we won't
know what position we're going to try out.

CYBERSEX

A great alternative for those who are seperated, is to turn to cybersex. We can
start by writing them suggestive messages; we can even add a sexy picture.
We can tell him what we'd do if we'd have him right there with us, or what
we'd like him to do to us. The sexual tension will be slowly rising. And if we
see that we need more stimulation, we can finish by making a video call.
Masterbating in front of the webcam and watching how our partner does it
too will be very gratifying.

Without any intentions of avoiding the main objective of this book, it may be
considerable to emphasize the importance of not mixing pleasure with the
lack of common sense. If we want to send suggestive pictures or videos,
we're free to do so, of course; but it is convenient to bear in mind that it is
wise to avoid our face or data to be seen in them. This way we prevent the
possibility of them using it against us, whether it is our current partner or
third parties that would have access to such material.

SLOW SEX

A game that is similar to “Stopwatch / Timer” would be Slow Sex. At least

it's aim is the same: to extend the experienced sensations as much as possible
during foreplay. In this case there is no time limit involved, but its rules are
much more pretentious. It is forbidden to ejaculate, and whoever does, loses.
This way you get to extend the pleasure and excitement until one of the two
can't anymore and succumbs to ecstasy.

TO THE RHYTHM OF THE MUSIC

Many times sensual music is played to enhance nights of passion. But, what
if we played more lively music rather than slow rhythmic music? We could
play at trying to keep up with the beat of the songs while having sexual
relations. This technique can be very useful for those who have a difficult
time establishing a good penetration rhythm.

MIRRORS

We can also try some very simple elements, like mirrors. We can distribute
several of them all around in our room, so they reflect the bed from different
perspectives. This game will encourage eroticism and inspire us to try new
positions, all just to see us reflected in the mirror.

THE FRUIT TRAY

Who doesn't remember that image of the Romans eating grapes relaxed on
their beds? Well, now is a good time to remember such a scene. We can
prepare a fruit tray and some good wine, and we take it to bed. We'll take
turns in one feeding the other. We can sprinkle a little wine on his body and
then lick it off. We can also spread a little fruit over his body and then eat it
little by little. As we're getting closer to his genitals, he'll start getting more
and more excited.

13

TRUTHS AND MYTHS

 “Truth will always be the ground of freedom”.

Jesús Salas Salas

1.- A penis that is small when it is limp, will also be so when it is erect.
FALSE.

Not necessarily so. There are two types of penises: some that are small but
grow quite a bit when the get erect; and others that are already somewhat big
when relaxed, and only grow a little more when they get aroused. Most men
have the first type of penis, so don't jump to conclusions before going on to
the action.

2.- The masculine G-spot is in the prostate. TRUE

In fact, some refer to it as the “P” spot, from prostate. Further on, in a later
chapter, more will be explained about this area and how to stimulate it.

3.- Younger women excite more. TRUE

Even though “True” was put down, it would be better said that it is a half
truth. Yes it's true men have a tendency to look at women who are younger
than they are. However, that doesn't mean that a mature woman can't appear
attractive to men their same age, or even younger men. A mature woman has
the experience that young girls lack. The older they are the more knowledge
in how to arouse a man, in what to do to him, when and in what way. It's not
so rare for a young man to go crazy over a woman who is older than he is.

4.- Using a condom during sexual relations makes men feel less pleasure.
FALSE.
There is a belief that using condoms during sexual relations, reduces
sensitivity and thus, experiencing less pleasure. However, in a research done
by Devon Hensel, of the Indiana University (USA), has shown that the
factors that predicted greater sexual satisfaction were by receiving oral sex
and the manual stimulation of the genitals. On the other hand, those who have
shown less sexual satisfaction was due to being uncomfortable with their
partner during the act or from erection problems. What must definitely be
kept in mind is the correct usage of the condom, considering that if the
condom is too small or not properly put on may cause discomfort, thus, have
an impact on the performance of the sexual activity. We must also try not to
interfere too much with the sexual relation itself when putting on the condom,
so for that we can be the ones to put the condom on, while we continue to
stimulate his penis.

Even so, there may be some men that prefer to do it without a condom,
because they prefer the contact of skin with skin. But that is due more to a
psychological reason rather than physical; it does not mean that for wearing a
condom they will feel less pleasure. While it's true, that at the beginning of
penetration, the sensitivity is different, but from half way through the act the
sensation tends to be exactly the same.

5.- In relationships in general, as well as sexual, the man takes the dominant
roll. FALSE

It is true that in the past, because of society and the education received, the
“power” belonged to the man. But since quite a few years ago, women have
strengthened and are in many aspects equal to men. There is still much work
to be done yet for complete equality, but the subject here that concerns us, we
can say that the dominant roll in sexual relations changes depending on the
couple and the situation. So, in a couple the man may have the active roll
today, and tomorrow it may be the woman who holds the reins of the game.
This also enriches the couple, because it gives freshness to the relationship,
and doesn't fall into monotony. What's more, men also get excited when
women take control every now and then.
6.- Size is important. TRUE.

Again, we speak of a half truth. The female G-point is 3 to 5 centimeters

from the entrance of the vagina, so any penis of this size or more could
stimulate this area. However, another thing to keep in mind is the thickness.
It is important to have enough thickness for the woman to “notice” that she's
being penetrated, and his penis stimulates the vaginal area. A penis that is too
thin, or just as well too short, would have more difficulties in stimulating this
area. Nevertheless, if this were our man's case, there are always other ways
just as satisfactory, or use sexual complements that could help us. On the
other hand, an excessive size, as well as in thickness and length, can also
cause complications: Penises that are too thick or too long, cause pain during
penetration. In as far as penises that are too thick, this can be redeemed with
more foreplay games in the vaginal area, so it dilates better, as well as using
more lubricant. And regarding penises that are too long, there are various
postures that prevent the man to penetrate the woman completely, for
example, the “teaspoon” posture, because lying on their sides the man hits his
pelvis against the woman's buttocks; this stops it from going further and
prevents the man from inserting the penis all the way. Another solution
would be for us to get on top of the man, this way we are the ones who set the
rhythm and the ones who decide how far his penis will go. For all this, we
might say that the size of a man's penis is important, not only for lacking, but
also for excess. So, one can turn to the typical saying “better the quality than
quantity”.

7.- Men fall asleep after having sexual relations. TRUE.

It is quite common for a man to fall asleep after having had sexual relations.
This can be quite frustrating for some women who can even come to consider
this a lack of respect. However, there is a biological reason that helps to
understand this. During ejaculation, the man's brain receives a cocktail of
chemicals, among which are norepinephrine, serotonin, oxytocin,
vasopressin, nitric oxide and the hormone prolactin. The latter one, prolactin,
is involved in the recovery time needed to re-engage in sexual intercourse
again (refractory period). In addition, this hormone isi also related to sleep, in
such a way that the more of this substance there is, the quicker the men will
fall asleep.

8.- Men who were circumcised feel more pleasure during sexual intercourse.
FALSE.

This statement has been considered false because some aspects have to be
emphasized in order to be able to understand it in its full measure. Men who
weren't circumcised have hypersensitivity in the glans due to it being covered
most of the time by the foreskin, avoiding contact with the exterior and
producing moisture. On the other hand, men who were circumcised
constantly rub against the underwear and release that excess moisture as well.
With all this, in circumcised men this hypersensitivity in the glans is reduced,
where as they can enjoy the stimulation in a different way. Generally, men
who decide to get circumcised when they're adults perceive the change in a
positive sense, even so, it doesn't mean that they feel more pleasure, it's just
that it's different. Nevertheless, there are also circumcised men that admit
having very little sensitivity in the glans and enjoy less than their friends who
aren't circumcised. Whichever it may be, both types of men enjoy the
stimulation in the glans; the only difference: different type of arousal.

9.- The longer the intercourse lasts, the better. FALSE.

A survey made to various sexual therapists determined that the ideal

intercourse duration should be between 7 and 13 minutes. Between 1 and 2 is
too short; between 3 and 7 is adequate; and more than 13, too long. Instead of
being concerned about the time we put into intercourse, we should be more
focused on the duration of foreplay: kissing, hugging, games, oral and
manual stimulation; considering that a higher performance in foreplay is
linked to greater satisfaction in the sexual relationship.
 14

PREMATURE EJACULATION

“Sex doesn't exist... Only what we do with it”.

Valérie Tasso
One of the worries men always have is if they don't manage to last all they
would like to in their sexual relations. This affects their manhood and, since
they're thinking about it while having sex, may also influence in their sexual
performance. Nevertheless, it should be made clear that some men have a
mistaken concept about what “lasting long enough” is. As it's been explained
in the previous chapter, to rate an intercourse as too short, it should last less
than two minutes. So, to consider that a man has a problem, ejaculation
should happen during the first few seconds after having started penetration,
or even, before starting intercourse.

Most men will experience premature ejaculation at one time or other in their
lives. There are many factors that influence it, like age, the novelty of having
a partner, postures, or time of withdrawal. However, if a type of physical
problem is suspected, don't hesitate to contact a professional to discard any
distress.

A psychological explanation given to this problem is that the man isn't

capable of detecting and recognizing the feelings ahead of time when he will
ejaculate. In line with this hypothesis, there are several techniques for the
man to learn how to detect these feelings.

On the one hand, we find the program of “stop-start”. We must stimulate our
partner's penis until he feels like he's going to ejaculate. At that moment, the
man will let us know and then we'll stop. Once the feeling is gone, we start
stimulating again. Before letting him ejaculate, this cycle must be repeated
three times.

The second technique is the “compression”. This technique is very similar to

the previous one. We must stimulate the penis until our partner feels like he's
going to ejaculate. Then, we stop and apply manual pressure on the glans,
with the thumb on the frenulum (or frenum) and the index and heart fingers
on the back part of the penis. The compression will last until the desire of our
man passes. This technique is also repeated three times before reaching
orgasm.
Another technique that helps control ejaculation is the strengthening of the
pubococcygeus muscles, which are on the pelvic floor. To exercise these
muscles a series of contractions are made called Kegel exercises, which
consists in doing as if we were holding back the flow of urine. In doing so,
you're tightening and loosening these muscles, thereby strengthening them. In
time, and on the basis of repititions, ejaculation can be controlled in a more
satisfactory way. These exercises don't imply any kind of suffering, since it
can be done anywhere: while waiting for the bus, while sitting by the
computer, while watching TV, etc. It'll be enough by starting with 50
contractions a day and gradually increase them.

In fourth place we have the retarding products. There are several brands that
among their products offer a range of gels and sprays that are made for
delaying ejaculation.These products produce an anesthetic effect in the penis,
getting the man to feel less sensitivity in the glans and, therefore, more
difficult to stimulate it.

Another strategy that could also be used is turning to the distraction

techniques during intercourse. For example, count backwards or think of an
unpleasant stimulus. Nevertheless, this technique is not very recommendable,
because if the annoying stimulus is associated with sex, it could produce a
dislike towards sex in the end. Furthermore, thinking about other things can
help delay ejaculation, but also making it difficult to experience pleasure.

Some men, already knowing their problem, turn to masterbation before

having a sexual relation. This can allow them to get less excited and hold out
more. However, this is a short-term solution, because with age, the refractory
period is higher. Therefore, the time that a man needs to rest between one
ejaculation and another is much longer, creating possible interferences with
the partner's desires.

Finally, another aspect that should be kept in mind are the positions that are
practiced during intercourse. In general, for men who have premature
ejaculation, for them it's better that we be the ones to sit on top of them and
be the ones to set the rhythms. If we notice that our man is getting too
excited, we can stop or reduce the rhythm. It would be more like the stop-
start exercise, but doing it during intercourse instead of masterbating.

15

ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION

“There are two causes of illness: one is material, the other is spiritual. If the
illness is in the body, it needs a material remedy; if it's in the soul, a spiritual
remedy ”.

Abdu`l-Bahá

Erection problems is another worry that men have. Most of the time, its cause
is due to a psychological aspect. Nevertheless, in case of doubt, one should
always go to a doctor, who will be the one to determine whether the problem
is physical or not.
One way to determine if the problem is psychological, is to see if the man has
complete erections in situations other than when performing intercourse. For
example, it could be that during foreplay or while he's masterbating, our
partner manages to get a stiff penis. However, at the time of penetration, it
deflates. In this case, it is probably a psychological cause: the anxiety of
wanting to do well is the most common one. For a psychologist, another way
to differenciate a physical problem is to observe if our man has morning
erections. If so, the erectile dysfunction is probably due to stress or another
psychological problem. Nevertheless, as it's already been mentioned, before
any kind of doubt, it's better to ask for professional advice.

Once we're clear about the problem being psychological and not physical,
there are several strategies that can be used to fix it.

First of all, there may be external causes that are exerting too much pressure
on our partner and so, is too stressed out and anxious to have sexual relations.
In this case, we should be aware and prepare grounds to relax him: a
massage, a hot bath, some hugs... However, in spite of all these efforts, our
man may not be able to forget his problems, so he'll still not be able to get an
erection.

A game that could come in handy is lying our partner nude on the bed, and
lightly brush a feather over different parts on the body. Our mission is that
the man focus on the physical sensations and forget the external problems.
Gradually, the feather can lead on to kisses, caresses or bites. The task for the
man will be to focus on the sensations the whole time, and nothing else. Once
the man has put his worries to one side, he'll get an erection due to all the
stimulation for sure.

Another cause that can provoke erectile dysfunction is the pressure to

perform well. The man is constantly thinking how he should do it and
demands too much of himself, creating worries that won't permit him to enjoy
the moment. A good solution is to propose playing a game where there will
be no penetration. We lie down on the bed both nude, one beside the other,
and we both stimulate each other: hugs, kisses, licking, little bites, etc. First
one of us taking turns and then the other. This has only one limitation, it is
forbidden to stimulate the masculine genital area. This rule is so that the man
is free from the pressure of having to get an erection, and allows him to enjoy
the physical sensations that his partner is offering him. Probably, by freeing
him from that load, he'll end up having an erection. It's up to us whether we
want to take advantage of this or not.

A very well known solution for erectile dysfunction is using pharmaceutical

drugs such as Viagra. However, there are some men who are reluctant to take
this type of medication; on one hand because they consider it artificial, and
on the other, for its possible side effects.

There are other cases where the men only get a semi-erection. Many times,
by just inserting the penis into the vagina, it being warm and moist, the penis
can get to its maximum size. However, there are also men who have some
disproportionate expectations and expect to get the same effect that they see
in porn movies. So as a result, anything removed from that expectation, they
consider a dysfunction.

Nevertheless, for cases where the semi-erection is real, there is another

technique that can be useful, it's called the mare's trick. This technique
involves us inserting the penis into the vagina and wrap our legs around it. At
the same time, we must harden the pubococcygeus muscles. This stimulation
will not only prevent the erection from decreasing, but will also succeed in
increasing it.

Another alternative is using penile rings. These rings are put at the base of the
penis when it's erect –sometimes they also cover the testicles–,. The ring
doesn't allow the blood to leave the penis, thus keeping the erection.
However, this product can be dangerous if proper precautions are not taken.
On one hand, it must be worn 30 minutes maximum; on the other, it would be
convenient to use lubricants so it's easier to take off; and finally, it is
recommended to shave the genital area so the hairs don't get tangled up with
the ring.
Now on the contrary, if the doctor confirms that the erectile dysfunction is
due to a physical cause, we'll have to reconsider what we understand as
sexual relations. You can do a lot of other things that equally provide
pleasure without using the penis. As far as the woman is concerned, there is
the cunnilingus (oral sex) or, if we want to be penetrated, we can use dildos
or vibrators. And as far as the man is concerned, he can enjoy any type of
stimulation. As we've already mentioned in the “masculine erogenous areas”
section, there are many areas that give pleasure to a man. Considering now
that we can't focus on the penis, how about trying to stimulate the prostate?
Let's remember in that area is where the masculine G-spot is –which will be
talked about in a later chapter–, that when stimulated produces very
satisfactory orgasms as well.

16

DELAYED EJACULATION:
HOW TO FINISH
 IN A SHORT TIME

“Sex is a bad beast of burden. The more obligations, suggestions, tips and
objectives imposed on it, the more it bucks up”.

Valérie Tasso

The opposite of premature ejaculation, some men take too long to complete
the task. Although to some women this could seem like a blessing, to the
majority of them this could also be a problem. To have a man on top of you
too long can be uncomfortable and, sometimes, even painful.

It's considered that one cause to this problem is that the man doesn't get
enough stimulation to reach the threshold of orgasm, so the treatment for that
is to focus on increasing such stimulation.

A fundamental basis to increase the sensations is to act in a more

provocative and sensual way during intercourse. For example, make face
gestures of satisfaction, moan, grab his buttocks or his back while he
penetrates us, touch our breasts, whisper something into his ear, or even
change rhythm. All that shows the passion we are feeling at that moment, and
that turns into a major arousal for the man.

In as far as intercourse is concerned, one of the techniques that can be used is

the “Singapur kiss” or “Pompoir”. It consists in using the vagina as if we
were sucking the penis. Instead of riding or lunging, both remain still and and
it's us who use our own pubococcygeus muscles to stimulate the penis. To
exercise these muscles, we must do the same like the man we treated with
premature ejaculation: the Kegel exercises. It would be enough to contract the
muscles for the maximum seconds possible. Vaginal cones or Chinese balls,
since in order for them to be kept inside, the muscle must work constantly.
Once it's strenghened, we can try this technique, we'd get very satisfactory
results for sure.

However, although a lot of stimulation is done and in different ways, it might

still be an effort for the man to ejaculate. This could be because in his mind
he still has other worries that keep him from concentrating on what he's
feeling. For example, the man may be concerned about his performance and
that can keep him from reaching an orgasm through intercourse.

To try to fix this, we can use two techniques. First of all, it is suggested to use
the Progressive Desensitization, which consists in the man gradually
approaching the goal of ejaculating through intercourse. The first step would
be to reach an orgasm alone, through masterbating himself. Once having
accomplished that, it will be done in the presence of the partner, being able
for her to participate as well. The next step is to have intercourse for a few
seconds and then finish by masterbating. And the last step, will try to reach a
climax, totally through penetration. This slow process would help the man
gain confidence in himself and would lose fear of his performance.

Secondly, Stimulation with Distraction can also be useful to us. It's a

technique where the man must relax, close his eyes, dive into his imagination
and let himself go by his erotic fantasies. Meanwhile, we stimulate his genital
parts, whether it's manual, oral or inserting the penis into the vagina. The fact
that we take the lead is to free the man from all types of pressure, permitting
him to experience pleasure without any concerns or worries. For this purpose
we can also help with literature or erotic movies.
 17

THINGS THAT SHOULD NEVER BE TOLD TO A

MAN

“Keep silent somewhere in one's own place and keep silent somewhere in
someone else's place, so that love doesn't change its name”.

Roberto Juarroz

In chapter 5 about “how to excite a man through sounds”, we've already

talked about what things to say or do to get our man to experience greater
pleasure. Here in exchange, we'll talk about what not to tell a man and, in
case it's necessary, how to say it so it is as painless as possible.

One of the things you shouldn't tell a man is that he's no good in bed, that he
doesn't do it right, that you don't reach an orgasm... This would destroy him.
If it's true that our partner doesn't satisfy us during sexual relations, we can
and should –for our sexual well being– let him know in a mild and cautious
way. We can use a resource that is known as the “sandwich technique”. It
consists in giving the bad news, but accompanied by something good that
precedes it and another one that follows it. For example, we can tell him: I
loved it when you got on top of me, but what you did in the end, hurt me a
little; you can try to do it this other way, because when you did it to me the
other time, I really enjoyed it. Another way of telling him would be, using
games to learn how we like it. For example, if we want him to perform oral
sex (cunnilingus), and we don't like the way he does it normally, we can put
whipped cream on our clitoris area, so he licks it and focuses on that area. If
there's no other alternative, we can always tell him directly. We could explain
it to him that we prefer to do other positions, or that we feel more pleasure if
he does it another way, etc. Communication at this point, would be very
important, but we must agree on doing it mildly.There are many ways to
improve these things without hurting our partner's sensitivity. We can make
new games that focus on those things that our man isn't too good at. We can
write well described acts and number them so, using a game-like dice that
randomly decides which number should be used explicitly where it's written
in the manual that we've made out, he'll then begin to do it correctly, and will
become aware of exactly how we like it. If the man notices that he'll like
some things in a different way, it is something we can use the same way in
reverse. It's how to get the most pleasure in a simple, fast way and reassure us
both to understand each other's necessities better.

Men concentrate all their virility on one single member: the penis. So we
must be careful when we say things about it, because we could demolish it.
Talking about its size, or color, can make him feel that it's not the desired
penis. Even though it's said with good intentions, it could make him feel bad
and even get depressed about it. For example, in saying: “it's small, but I
don't mind, I love it”, he could think that we're only saying it so as not to hurt
his feelings, but truthfully we're just faking the orgasms. In truth, we may not
mind what his penis looks like, but he does. So, to avoid any errors, better not
say anything.

Another thing men don't like is listening to sexual history that we've had with
other men before and even less, if we enjoyed it more with them than with
him. Although it may be true, there are certain things that are better not
mentioned. In general, any type of comparison with our ex-boyfriends will
not be appreciated, it will seem as though we have them more in our mind
than we should.
Finally, if he has a flaw that he has a complex about, don't emphasize it, we
should make him see that that characteristic is positive in some aspects. For
example, maybe his fingers are too long or thick; we can tell him that we love
it when he stimulates us with them. If he has a lot of hair on his body, we
could tell him that it makes him very manly. It consists in transforming what
our man considers a flaw into something positive.

18

THE IMPORTANCE OF INNOVATION

“Growth is something progressive and invisible, but so is the habit of being

common and mediocre. So dedicate yourself in body and soul and reinvent
things and improve them constantly. Without innovation, life is death”.

Robin Sharma

It's very easy to fall into a routine. In a life marked by obligations, sometimes
you even need to set a day and time to have sexual relations. The bad thing is,
that this robs the magic of the moment. We must not fall into monotony. It's
important to innovate constantly, so that the flame of desire never burns out.

Throughout this manual, it's been explained how to excite a man through his
different senses, which ones are his erogenous areas, what sexual fantasies go
through his head, what games or strategies we can use to create desire, etc.
Now is the time to apply them. We should be constantly thinking in how we
can improve or innovate our sexual life. Of course, if there is something we
find pleasant, there is no reason why we should eliminate it, but, why not try
new techniques? Maybe we can discover another type of pleasure, one that is
much more satisfactory. If we don't want to, we don't need to change our
sexual habits completely either; just making slight changes that could liven
up our desire would be enough, and that way also surprise our partner. For
example, we may like to have sexual relations in a certain position and,
preferably do it in the bed of our bedroom. Tha's ok. But why not try out a
game mentioned previously in our foreplays? Or take on new rolls? Or dress
up more seductive? There are thousands of strategies that can be introduced
into bed games, without having to change our usual ways completely.

However, if we're prepared to turn our sexual life around, we'd have to make
more important changes. We can begin by trying new positions. Normally,
the position used the most is the missionary one: the man on top of the
woman. But there is an endless variety of positions, thus the reason why
Kama-sutra became so popular.

A change from the missionary position is that, instead of us lying flat, we

should lift our legs and put them in a “V” shape position. This helps make
penetration much easier.

Another position would be the Amazon woman, where the woman gets on
top of the man, like mounting a horse, facing him. In this position we are the
ones who dominate the situation. Another alternative, known as the cowgirl,
would be, instead of being face to face with the man, we would be with our
back to him.

Of course, on this list of positions we can't leave out the doggy position. The
woman is on all fours and the man behind her, he gets on his knees so he can
penetrate her. It is one of the positions most wanted by men, since it makes
them feel as if they were in a pornographic movie.
Another position that men just love is doing it standing up. In this position,
the man is standing up and the woman would have her arms around him, like
a koala bear. This placement requires that the man has a very good muscular
structure, because if he doesn't, he wouldn't be able to hold on to us for very
long. One alternative is that he supports us against the wall or a table.

Another alternative to the two previous ones, would be the doggy position
standing up. This time, both of us are standing up, but we would be with our
back to the man and bent over forwards from the waist.

As we're finishing this up, a very romantic position would be the spoon.
Besides being a position for sleeping, it can also be used for sexual relations.
It's very simple and doesn't tire as much, since both are lying down. Both
must lie on their sides, with the man against the woman's back. This position
allows the man to cover our whole body from behind, being able to stimulate
the clitoris or breasts while penetrating us.

And finally, a position that is also good for any place is the sitting position. It
doesn't require a lot of explanation: the man sits on a chair and we sit on top
(facing him or our back to him, whichever we prefer). Although this position
might excite men, it also limits their mobility quite a bit, so it would have to
be us to set the rhythms.

Not only can we innovate by changing positions in bed, we can also change
other things, such as places. We don't need to turn to the scenarios described
in the “exhibitionism” section, but we can try to have sexual relations in other
places, different to the bed. Like for example, in the shower, on the couch, in
the kitchen, or in the bed of a hotel.

We must let our imagination go free to light the flame of love.

 19

PERFECT MASTURBATION

“Don't mess with masterbation. It is making love to someone I love”.

Woody Allen

Masturbation has always been eternally underestimated in sexual activity.

Since it's something you can do yourself, it seems like it takes away the credit
and doesn't provide pleasure, even if another person does it to you. However,
masturbation well done can be the same or even more satisfactory than oral
sex.

Masturbation doesn't have to be the target of sexual activity, but it can be the
predecessor to other practices. Besides, it can be used to alternate during oral
sex, using it as a rest period.

Before anything else, we must keep various things in mind for masturbation
to be ideal and not find ourselves cut short. First, we must be sure to have
soft hands and fingernails nicely cut; callused hands or broken fingernails
could cause unpleasant scrapes and scratches. What's more, it's advisable to
use a water-based lubricant or body oil, if possible; it would help the hand
slide better and our man would feel the greatest pleasure. It could be
interesting to use a different scented oil each time and see what reactions it
produces in our partner. Lastly, we must make sure to have all the products
that we'll need (lubricant, condoms, etc.) on board; it would be quite
frustrating having to get up and leave in the middle of masturbating.

In as far as Sexually Transmitted Infections are concerned, it's very

improbable that they'd be transmitted through masturbation, especially
because you would need to have an open and bleeding sore on the hand, for
the semen to be able to transmit the infection. However, if we think that our
partner may have HIV or any other Sexually Transmitted Disease and we
want to be safer, we can always use gloves. This technique would provide a
new and different sensation to our man (we can even use it as part of a game
playing the roll of a police officer or nurse).

For good masturbation, it's also important that both are comfortable, we will
be the ones who should find our ideal position. There are many positions to
choose from. We can stand up, facing each other; this way while we
masturbate him, he can watch us. To vary a little, we'd both be standing up
with us behind the man; this way we can masturbate him at the same time
we're rubbing our body against his back. We can also get down on our knees
in front of him, while our man is sitting on a chair, on a couch or on a bed.
Another version of this position would be instead of sitting down, our partner
would be standing up. Another position would be both sitting down, side by
side; this position is good if we want to kiss while we masturbate. What's
more, you can easily do it anywhere. In this position, you could also make a
little change. Instead of both being seated, we could be lying down.This way,
both of us could keep on kissing and stimulating each other mutually. A more
sensual position would be the man lying down and us sitting on top of his
legs, facing him. And finally, the most complicated position would be the
“doggy” style. On this occasion, the one who puts themselves in this position
is the man, and we should either place ourselves underneath, or we could ask
him to spread his legs and masturbate him from behind. We can try any
position that we can think of and whatever we find attractive.
But before we start with masturbation in itself, we must “prepare” our man.
We can use any of the techniques and advice that have been suggested
throughout this manual: dress sexy and perform a strip-tease, a body
massage, kiss different erogenous areas, or anything else that comes to mind
and think it's going to excite him.

A good way to start is to massage the thigh area or abdomen. Since they're
near the genitals, it would bring on a noticeable erection. What's more, our
hair touching these areas will stimulate him a lot, so we must take advantage
and kiss his thighs and abdomen as well.

It seems easy to masturbate a man, “ it's just moving the hand from up going
down”. But no, if it's not done right, it could give him no pleasure at all or
even hurt him. What's more, each man feels pleasure in a completely
different way with each movement of the hand on his penis. What is
satisfactory for some is painful for others and vice-versa. The way you hold
the penis, move it, how to use the hand in both pressure as well as speed is
different in each man. There are two ways that can help us understand the
best way to get him to reach ecstasy with this method. One of them is to ask
him to masturbate directly in front of us so we can watch how he likes it. And
the second way, once carefully observed how he does it, it's as simple as if he
were guiding us. We put our hand on his penis, and he puts his hand on ours,
showing us how to go down then up, where to put pressure and how and
towards what sides he likes the movements. It could even be a moment of
intimacy and depth for a special couple.

To begin with, foreplay before masturbating is what creates more expectation

and the eventual best pleasure possible. Just as we've already commented on
other occasions, we can start on the neck, the chest, legs, thighs, etc. It's
about making him see it'll be unlikely for us to touch the area he's craving for.
We could touch it every now and then but just briefly, this will excite him
very much and he'll go crazy because we completely touched his genitals. To
continue, we must put some lubricant on our hands and spread a little on his
penis. We'll start stimulating it with just our fingertips. Then we put our
thumb at the height of the frenulum (or frenum), and the index and heart
fingers on the back part of the penis. Now we'll make circular movements
with all of them. Next, we wrap our hand around the penis and start moving
from the bottom going up, from the base to the glans. When we finish with
one hand, we continue with the other one, alternating them. We should be
gentle, because if not, we could hurt him. Now we hold the base of the penis
with one hand, and with the other stimulate his glans, rubbing it with the
palm of our hand. We must remember to use a lubricant, because if we don't
our hand will end up being too rough, since the glans is very sensitive. Then,
we can continue with our hand wrapped around the penis and making long
movements from the base till the tip of the penis. Simultaneously, we'll be
turning the hand as we go up and down. Later, we can do it with both hands
and turn each hand in one direction. We can also change this last technique
and instead of the whole hand, we can form like a ring between our index
finger and thumb, and make the same movements as before. By not using the
whole palm of the hand, it'll feel different.

We can alternate masturbating with massages on the scrotum or the

perineum, and even press on the scrotum causing separation between the
scrotum and its penis (be careful not to hurt it) and continue moving the hand
over it in different ways, changing them gradually without abruptness. This
will increase the stimulation in our man, so he'll get an orgasm a lot sooner.
We can also do it in reverse: while we work on the penis with one hand more
evenly, we can stimulate his scrotum with the other hand moving it in
different ways and with different pressures. We can also put his testicles in
our hand and massage them softly; or the perineum, pressing gently on this
area we'll be stimulating the prostate: the masculine G-spot.

One thing we should never forget is that it's very important to keep eye
contact. Looking at him sensuously while we're masturbating him will be a
source of pleasure for him, indescribable and irreplaceable.

If we don't have any lubricants, we should masturbate with the utmost care:
we shouldn't move our hand from the glans to the base, especially if our man
is exceptionally “equipped”. Because, without any lubrication, we'd be
stretching the skin too much and we'd hurt the frenulum. Nor should we
perform the maneuvers suggested earlier; it would be much harder to slide
our hands around, and thus causing our partner pain very easily. In the case
that our man isn't circumcised, we should limit ourselves to make short up
and down movements, from the glans to the middle of its trunk. On the other
hand, if he is circumcised, we will make movements from the middle of the
penis till just before reaching the glans. By not having the foreskin and no
particular skin for protection, stimulating his glans without lubrication can be
very painful. In any case –and this serves for all men–, while our man will be
secreting preseminal liquid, and with the help of a little saliva, we can also
begin to stimulate the glans with our hand.

The pressure we apply in each movement will be set by our partner. He may
be sensitive and likes for us to do it delicately, or maybe prefers to feel more
intensity and ask us to do it harder.

When our partner is about to finish, we shouldn't change rhythm and, above
all, we must not move the position of our hand. Stopping movement even if
only for an instant, could deflate his excitement. Once he's started to
ejaculate, do not stop to stimulate him until he's finished completely (there
are men who like to change the movement of the hand from fast to gradually
slower, with less pressure on the base and pressing harder when closer to the
glans, like as if helping to get all the fluids out). If we would stop, he'd
continue to ejaculate anyway, but wouldn't feel the same pleasure. For all of
this, there are some men who prefer to control their own orgasm, and choose
to finish off themselves. In these cases, we could help by massaging his
testicles or his perineum, or caress his thighs. We can make him notice how
we get excited by watching him masturbate himself. That would help him
reach his climax (for a more thorough knowledge on a magnificent
masturbation and how to get the best results possible, the specific book on
masturbation of this same series is recommended).

Just like any other technique, an essential thing is communication. We need

to know if he likes what we're doing, or if he prefers us to do it differently.
What is also convenient to know is what things we are not prepared to do,
that way he won't ask us to do them.

20

PANDORA'S BOX: FELATION (ORAL SEX)

“The only place you can control a man is in bed. If we would perpetually
give men oral sex, we could dominate the world”.

Samantha Jones, character in Sex in the City.

Before we begin with fellatio or commonly known as oral sex, it is important

to talk with our partner about some aspects. First, we should know how he
likes oral sex done to him. It would be good to know how to do it correctly in
order to avoid making mistakes that the man might dislike, like using the
teeth on the glans.

Another point to consider is where he can ejaculate, whether in the mouth or

somewhere else. Men tend to love the idea of finishing off in their woman's
mouth. However, some women object to the man coming in her mouth, so, to
avoid unpleasant surprises, better mention it to him before you start. It is also
true that there are men who don't like to kiss their partner after having
swallowed his semen. So, if we want to kiss our man after having finished,
we may prefer for the man not to ejaculate in our mouth. However, there are
alternatives, like spitting the semen out instead of swallowing it, or clean our
mouth as soon as we've finished. So, if we decide for him to ejaculate outside
of our mouth, we can choose a place that turns us on, like on the back, on the
face, on the breasts or even in the vagina.

Another matter that seems to be problematic is when putting the hands on the
woman's head while she's performing oral sex. Some men like to guide their
woman in the process, but sometimes, due to his excitement, he can get
carried away with his strength and make the woman uncomfortable, even
feeling choked or wanting to vomit. That's why it's important to establish a
sign between both so that the man knows if he can put his hands on her head
or not. Our desire may depend on what day it is and how excited we are, so
the use of this sign could avoid many problems.

Lastly, in case we don't like the way the genitals smell or we feel there's too
much hair in that area, we can always suggest that we get more excited with
that area trimmed or recently showered. If we want him to do it at that
moment, the interruption could be too much. However, to solve the smell, we
can always suggest to do foreplay in the shower. That way, besides
stimulating him, we get to wash his genitals, and all that without interrupting
the excitement. We may also not like the taste of his semen, but on the other
hand, would like to swallow it because we want to satisfy our man or because
it turns us on doing it. One solution is to insert the penis more notoriously
when our partner is going to ejaculate, in such a way that the sperm will fall
directly in our throat, without touching the taste buds. That way we avoid
savoring the taste of the sperm we dislike so much.

As far as oral sex safety is concerned, there is some misinformation about if it

is safe or not regarding the transmission of HIV. On one hand, there was a
very confident part of the population that considered it was safe, so therefore
weren't concerned about doing it, including with strangers. Years later, a
movement began in order to prevent HIV in which using condoms was also
recommended when practicing oral sex.

Today, there is an action program that, in case of having performed a practice

of spontaneous and exceptional risk (for example, vaginal intercourse with
condom breakage), if we got to a hospital during the first 48-72 hours, they
may give us anti-retroviral drugs so that infection doesn't start. In this
protocol, oral sex is considered a low risk, whereas, if going to a hospital,
they wouldn't give us prophylaxis. This explains that, in order to have an HIV
transmission, it must be through the bloodstream. If the mouth is well taken
care of and there are no open sores, there is no way that HIV is transmitted
into the bloodstream, since the oral mucosa isn't as absorbant as the vaginal
or anal one –in which there is a higher risk–. Even so, if there are doubts
whether our partner may have HIV or if there are sores or injuries in our
mouth, it is always recommendable to use condoms; or go to a doctor to
resolve issues that arise. We must remember that sexual activity is enjoyed
temporarily, while health is something important for life; therefore, when in
doubt, it is always better to prevent.

Now we will name some of the different types of techniques that there are,
depending on the stimulation used. From hereon, it is us who will choose
which one we'll use and in which order (for a more thorough knowledge on
fellatio (oral sex) and how to get the best results possible, the specific book
on oral sex (fellatio) of this same series is recommended).

We must remember to look at our man while we practice oral sex, it'll turn
him on very much; and also, watching his gestures and the faces he makes
will help us to know the techniques he likes most. Above all, we should show
him that we're enjoying what we're doing; make him feel we need to give him
oral sex.

On one hand, we have the labial techniques. We can start approaching our
moist lips to his glans, and with the mouth closed, stroke his penis with our
lips as if it were lipstick. Gradually, we open our mouth until we form an
“O”. Then we slide our lips from the head down to the base of the penis, or as
far as we can, so we can touch it lightly. Then we can make the same
movement, but with the mouth almost completely closed and forcing entrance
of the penis through our lips, giving the sensation that feels like penetrating at
the beginning of intercourse when the entrance is still quite closed and
penetration is somewhat of an effort. To add a little more stimulation, we can
move our mouth around as we're moving up and down. We can also give
little pecking kisses on his member. Also using the tip of the tongue in
different parts and finishing off with a huge lick running the tongue from the
base of the glans to the tip with the tongue completely spread out and flat.
Finally, we can add small suctions while giving kisses. Soft breathing along
his penis and his scrotum will also be very satisfactory.

On the other hand, we have the licking techniques. Although these methods
are not as satisfactory as those using the mouth, they are a good compliment
to diversify the type of stimulation. We can begin by licking the base of the
penis surrounding it as if we were following a circular line, and slowly,
moving up towards the glans forming a second straight line from below
moving up pressing more each time. We can also make circular movements,
and when we reach the glans, take some time to play around a little in that
area. We should especially focus on his frenelum and can give gentle licks or
little, short and quick licks with the tip of the tongue noticing the movement
of the skin. This area is very sensitive, so the type of movements he likes
most and how much pressure he can take before it starts to hurt must be kept
in mind. It's one of the areas that give the most pleasure, as long as it's always
taken into consideration at specific moments. Regarding the glans, we can
also resort to quick movements with the tongue. Another thing that tends to
excite them a lot is keeping the mouth open, take the penis with one hand and
softly hit our tongue with it towards the inside of the mouth. We can wag the
tongue on the head of his penis just as they would do during a cunnilingus
(oral sex on a woman). We can do this when we have the glans inside the
mouth, lightly pressing the lips against the penis. It generally tends to be a
combination they just love.

And lastly, are the suction techniques. These are the most important in the
art of fellatio; they are the ones that get our man to reach an orgasm almost
immediately. One possibility is to suck the upper part of the penis. To do this
we totally cover the head of the penis with our mouth, not leaving the frenum
out, and we make an ascending and descending suction movement without
ever using the teeth; this is done only with the lips (we must point out that
there are men who get more excited if the suctions are done from below
moving up, as if trying to extract the liquid out that it contains). At the same
time, we can also use the tongue to stimulate the glans. We can vary the
suction rhythm or intensity, depending on whether we prefer our man to
finish soon, or watch him twist and turn with pleasure. We can just focus on
the upper part of the penis, but we can also stimulate the trunk at the same
time or alternate doing both (this way we make the pleasure greater by not
focusing only on one area). In this case, we will make the same movements
as the previous technique, but instead of just focusing on the upper part, we'll
insert the whole member, as far as we can and in turn, won't cause us
discomfort. One recommendation is that, once we've inserted the penis
almost completely, we should try to moan or even vocalize something that
excites him. The vibrations of the vocal cords that are transmitted through his
penis will give him tremendous pleasure. Once again, we don't need to reach
the base, just go as far as we can without feeling uncomfortable.

On the other hand, if we'd want to insert the penis completely, we'd be
performing what is known as “deep throat”. This technique has some
difficulty, because depending on the size of the penis, it could cause choking
or even gagging. Although for a woman it can be annoying, the man loves to
watch as the woman chokes. Of course, this doesn't mean he wants to harm
us, in the majority of researches they've come to the conclusion that this
happens because of the way this act makes them feel dominant and in control
of the situation; what's more, it makes them feel proud that their penises are
so big that they don't fit in their lovers' mouth. One thing must be kept in
mind and that is what position is it done in, because if we're facing our
partner, it would be more difficult to insert it completely, since the penis
would cover our throat completely. The best solution is for our man to lie
down face up and we get on top of him, but in reverse, facing his feet. This is
the most appropriate position if we're just beginning with this practice.
Gradually we'll be gaining experience and the gagging reflex will disappear.
However, there are some women who continue to gag even with practice.
One possible solution is to practice with a vibrator that is a similar size to our
partner's penis. This can help familiarize us with an object in our throat and
calm down the nauseating reflex. Nevertheless, if we still keep feeling
unfomfortable, we can introduce the penis just as far as we can; there are
many other techniques that can supplement the “deep throat”.

Apart from the techniques themselves, there are also other strategies that are
just as good for adding “spice” to oral sex. For example, the fellatio
surprise. Watching how we're getting closer between his legs and undoing
his pants, will make our man heat up right away. The unexpected of the
situation is a point in our favor. Now all that is needed is choosing the time
and place: in the shower, in a swimming pool, in the sea, in a public
restroom, in the field... Let our ingenuity fly and surprise him.

Another tactic we can use to intensify feelings during oral sex is to insert
different substances in our mouth that bring on new sensations during the
fellatio. For example, ice. We can put a piece of ice in our mouth and move it
around with our tongue. Once it's melted or just about to, we can start to
perform the fellatio. Contrast of the cold tongue with the wamth that our
mouth releases and the excitement of the moment, will make him shiver with
pleasure. Another alternative is to eat an ice cream while practicing oral sex,
alternating one licking the ice cream and then licking the penis, the scrotum...
If the cold is too much, we can also eat a mint candy. The sensations are
nearly the same, and some men who are very sensitive to the cold, can even
feel more pleasant and prefer the remarkable difference of the effect of mint.
We can also play with the opposite of cold: warmth. Drinking a hot drink
before doing oral sex, will make our man even more excited than he already
is, causing feelings to be experienced more intensely.

It's important to remember that it's not only about the man enjoying himself,
the woman can also and should enjoy just as much. So, why not spread
whipped cream or chocolate on his penis? This would make the practice
much more entertaining and it would be a lot more fun for us. If we want to
give it a touch of fun, we can try the famous Dr Pepper fizzy candies. We
can put a couple on our tongue and lick them on his glans. The tiny
“crackling” that he'll feel will give him goose bumps.

To finish off, we're going to mention the positions in which oral sex can be
performed. The one most commonly used is when the woman gets on her
knees, while the man is standing up or sitting down. One choice would be
Captain Morgan, where the man, who's standing up, lifts one leg and rests it
on a chair or a bed, leaving the scrotum in view. This makes it easier for us to
stimulate it.

Another very popular one is known as “69”. The woman lies down on top of
her partner, but in reverse, leaving her genitals on her partner's face. This
allows for the man to stimulate her, at the same time that she performs oral
sex to her man. In this technique a variation could be applied, instead of
lying on top of each other, they could lie on their sides.

Another option would be for the man to be lying down, and the woman on
top facing him. In this position, if the man opens up his legs a bit, we can also
stimulate his scrotum and perineum. A small adaption of this technique
would be that the man has his legs stretched out and the woman gets on top
of one of them, like a koala bear. This allows the woman to be able to rub
herself against the leg, making the man notice how moist and excited she is.

The following position would be that of the dog, that can also be done with
oral sex. On this occasion, the man gets on all fours and the woman can
perform oral sex positioned from behind. In addition, this position allows to
stimulate the perineum and scrotum. However, if one of the two don't feel
comfortable being so close to the anus, the woman can lie down underneath
the man and perform oral sex from there, also being more practical for all the
possibilities of this practice.

Another possibility is when the man sits on top of our chest, resting his
knees on the bed so as not to put too much pressure on us. This position
permits that it's the man who has control, being able to insert his penis
however he likes. What's more, the woman's hands are free to stimulate other
areas of the man, or to stimulate herself. Nevertheless, one important point is
to set a signal in case the woman feels she's suffocating or feels
uncomfortable; considering it's possible, fruit of passion, that the man
introduces his penis too fast, causing an uncomfortable situation for us.

Finally, one of the most delicate positions consists in the woman lying down
face up, putting her head on the edge of the bed. The man stands or gets on
his knees facing the bed and it is he who puts the penis into the woman's
mouth. This position is perfect to perform the “deep throat” technique.
However, being the man in control, it would also be convenient to remember
and agree on a signal to warn in case of discomfort.

In these sections we've explained the masterbation and fellatio techniques as

independent and seperate methods. However, just as it's been mentioned in
previous chapters, both techniques can be praticed combining them together,
and merging one with the other, in a way that such combination can be even
more pleasurable. For example, we can be stimulating the glans with the
mouth and, masterbating him with the hand, etc. The best of sexual pleasure
is all the possible methods and that all of them can be used alternately
depending on what we want at the time.
 21

THE MASCULINE G-SPOT

“Life flees: do not prove to be so difficult to the happines that presents

itself”.

Stendhal

Few heterosexual men have dared to stimulate the masculine G-Spot. This is
found in the prostate, inside the anus. However, there are more and more men
who venture to try this type of pleasure.

Nevertheless, it's normal for some men who are reluctant with this type of
practice. Society associates anal stimulation with the collective homosexual,
and some men prefer to stay away from that world. Either because they see
themselves as less “macho” if they try it, or for fear of liking it and that
would mean they're homosexuals, or fearing the unknown. Whatever the
reason, don't pressure them to accept. If they don't feel comfortable with the
idea, it doesn't matter; they are the ones really losing out. Of course, what
must never be done is to insert a finger without having asked first. This
situation could be very uncomfortable and cause a very unpleasant reaction in
the man.

On the other hand, if our man doesn't have any prejudice or fears about this,
we should encourage ourselves to go ahead and offer our partner new
experiences.

Just like the woman's anus, the man also needs stimulation so it gradually
dilates. But first of all, we should use lubrication, this will be fundamental.

First we can start with massaging around the edges of the anus. We'll make
small circular movements with the tip of our fingers. If we feel up to it, we
can use our tongue to stimulate the anal area. Here it will also influence on
how clean and careful the man is, and that he tends to having the maximum
healthiness of the situation. If we've already planned the session, he'll surely
be ready for us to stimulate him without any fear.

Gradually, we insert the first part (phalanx) of our finger. Then we make
small swirling circular movements. When we notice his anus relaxing, we'll
go a little deeper. About 5 centimeters (approximately 2 inches) into the anus,
we must press the finger against the anal wall, in the direction to where the
penis is. We will notice a little bump there, similar to an almond. That is the
masculine G-Spot. We should massage it lightly, pressing softly. Then we
make circular movements with the tip of our finger and we'll see how our
man twists and turns with pleasure. There are also some women though, that
may dislike to insert their finger into the anus. Using a glove or a condom is a
solution but well lubricated, of course. There are also objects especially
designed for this purpose.

The best position to stimulate our man's prostate is for him to lie down face
up and then pull his knees up to his chest. This way we have access to his
anus and we can also stimulate his perineum, the scrotum and most
important, the penis. Combining the anal stimulation with oral sex we'll get
our man to enjoy the best sex ever in his life.
We recommend the following book: “GODDESS of SEX: Discover the art of
ORAL SEX (felation)” by the same pseudonym: Dylan Summers. No man
will be able to resist. All the keys and secrets to do UNFORGETTABLE
ORAL SEX.

AUTHOR`S FACEBOOK:
https://www.facebook.com/SaraBurilloMolinero/?fref=ts

AUTHOR`S CONTACT:

ansiedadqama@gmail.com

saraburillomoliner@gmail.com

OTHER AUTHOR`S BOOKS:

→ How to attract, seduce, captivate and influence others

→ Anxiety, Somebody help me!!

→ Discover your talent, make it your business

→ Kybalion: Discover the Law of Attraction

→ GODDESS of SEX: Discover the art of ORAL SEX (felation) under the
pseudonym “Dylan Summers”

NOTES
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