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CONTENTS OCTOBER | NOVEMBER 2017
FEMININE WISDOM FOR YOUR JOURNEY

EXPERT COLUMNISTS
TRANSFORMING YOUR
RELATIONSHIP
with Stacey Martino On the Cover
page 68
LIVING THE GODDESS LAPTOP
LIFESTYLETM
with Lisa Marie Rosati

page 78
HOLISTIC BUSINESS SUCCESS
SECRETS
with Shelley Riutta

page 86
LIVING A SOUL-HEARTED LIFE
with Dr. Debra R. Reble

page 26

MANIFESTING THE LIFE OF


YOUR DREAMS
with Ann Sanfelippo In Memory of Louise Hay
page 34 1926-2017
Photo Credit: Hay House

LIVING A RADICALLY
ENGAGED LIFE™
with Marianne MacKenzie

page 30

14 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


CONTENTS
“Love is the great miracle cure. Loving ourselves
works miracles in our lives.”
LOUISE HAY

Wisdom & 30 SAYING YES! TO A Health &


Self-Growth DIFFERENT FUTURE Wellness
by Marianne MacKenzie

34 CELEBRATE “There is no
YOURSELF AND certainty; there is
ACCELERATE
YOUR DREAMS only adventure.”
by Ann Sanfelippo –ROBERTO ASSAGIOLLI

42 EMBRACING LIFE’S
TRANSITIONS AS
ADVENTURE
by Kelley Grimes
22 A BEACON OF
LIGHT: LOUISE 46 5 WAYS TO HELP
HAY YOUR CHILD COPE
by Linda Joy WITH BACK-TO-
SCHOOL ANXIETY
38 ALLOWING
26 PRACTICING by Amanda Hinman
WHAT IS EVEN
THE 5 STEPS OF
WHEN IT’S
COMPASSIONATE 50 DISSOLVING
UNCOMFORTABLE FEAR THROUGH
DETACHMENT
by Lara Jaye ACCEPTANCE
by Debra Reble
by Bailey Gaddis

15
CONTENTS
“The point of power is always in
the present moment.”
LOUISE HAY

Relationships

64 ENLIGHTENED
PARENTING:
CREATE
COMMUNITY
by Meryl Davids Landau
54 THE REASON
SOCIALIZING 72 ARE YOU
DRAINS ABANDONING
INTROVERTS MORE YOURSELF?
THAN EXTROVERTS by Dr. Margaret Paul
by Jenn Grenneman
74 3 QUESTIONS
57 YOUR HEART: TO HELP YOU
THE GIFT OF REDEFINE YOUR
68 TRANSFORM YOUR
INSPIRATION DIVORCE
RELATIONSHIP:
by Suzanne Scurlock-Durana by Mal Duane
HOW TO FORGIVE
AND START
60 WRITE FROM THE
ANEW IN YOUR
HEART: A METHOD
RELATIONSHIP
THAT PROBES
YOUR DEPTH by Stacey Martino
by Marcia Mariner

16 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


CONTENTS “We are each responsible for all of our experiences.”
LOUISE HAY

Career | Business

78 MAGICAL LIVING
MISCONCEPTIONS
DISPELLED
by Lisa Marie Rosati

82 6 WAYS TO GENERATE LINDA JOY || Publisher & Editor-In-Chief | Linda@aspiremag.net


COMPELLING CLIENT- Creative & Brand Direction || RACHEL DUNHAM | www.YourBrandTherapy.com
CENTRIC BLOG POSTS Editorial Layout || MANDY GATES | www.GruveDesign.com
Graphic Designer || MANDY GATES | www.GruveDesign.com
by Deborah Kevin COO || KIM TURCOTTE | www.SoulPurposeBusinessSolutions.com

86 5 STEPS TO TAKE MAILING ADDRESS || P.O. BOX 1149 | LAKEVILLE, MA 02347


ADVERTISE IN ASPIRE’S CONSCIOUS BUSINESS DIRECTORY || <CLICK HERE>
THE LEAP & FLY
MULTIMEDIA MARKETING PACKAGES FOR VISIONARY WOMEN || <CLICK HERE>
by Shelley Riutta CONTACT || ClientCare@Linda-Joy.com

17
EXPERT COLUMNISTS
STACEY MARTINO LISA MARIE ROSATI
Transforming Your Relationship Living the Goddess Laptop
Sought after Relationship Expert Stacey Martino
knows that it only takes ONE partner to transform
LifeStyleTM
Lisa Marie Rosati is a leading Intuitive Success
a relationship… ANY relationship! Stacey and her
Coach for spiritual women and soulful
husband Paul empower individuals with the tools
entrepreneurs. She’s the Creatrix of The Goddess
& strategies to transform their relationship… and
Lifestyle Plan™, Expert Columnist for Aspire
you don’t need your partner to participate in the
Magazine, International Best Selling Author
process, for you to get the results you want in your
and High Priestess of The Goddess Lifestyle
relationship! Stacey and Paul are the founders
Sisterhood™. Lisa’s a mom of three and has
of RelationshipDevelopment.org and creators of
successfully built a thriving global lifestyle business
RelationshipU®. Today, through their programs
while raising her children. It’s Lisa’s passion and
and live events, Stacey and Paul help thousands of
divine purpose to inspire and teach women how
people transform their love relationship! And as a
to magically create an abundant, purposeful life
happy bonus, you get to apply the same strategies
and prosperous business they love!
to improve all your relationships. Trained and
certified by Tony Robbins, Stacey is a certified www.GoddessLifestylePlan.com
marriage educator and divorce preventionist.
An international best-selling author, Stacey is a
sought-after relationship expert, passionate and
engaging speaker and media guest and is the
Relationship Expert for Aspire Magazine.

SHELLEY RIUTTA DR. DEBRA R. REBLE


Holistic Business Success Secrets Living a Soul-Hearted Life
Shelley Riutta MSE, LPC is the founder and Consciously merging her practical tools as a
President of the Global Association of Holistic psychologist with her intuitive and spiritual gifts,
Psychotherapy and Coaching (GAHP). She is a Intuitive Psychologist Dr. Debra Reble empowers
Holistic Psychotherapist and creator of a 6-Figure women to connect with their hearts and live
Holistic Psychotherapy Practice. Because of her authentically and supports them in breaking
success at creating a thriving Holistic Practice through their energetic and spiritual blocks to
she launched the Global Association of Holistic self-love. Debra is the International Best-selling
Psychotherapy and Coaching (GAHP), which author of Being Love: How Loving Yourself
supports Holistic Therapists, Healers, Coaches Creates Ripples of Transformation in Your
and Health Practitioners to learn more about Relationships and the World (Inspired Living
Holistic Methods and develop Thriving 6 Figure Publishing) and the author of Soul-Hearted
Holistic Practices. This quickly became a Partnership: The Ultimate Experience of Love,
multi-6 Figure business and one of the leading Passion, and Intimacy, which garnered four
Holistic Training and Holistic Business Building book awards including the Eric Hoffer award.
Organizations in the world. www.DrDebraReble.com
www.TheGAHP.com

ANN SANFELIPPO MARIANNE MACKENZIE


Manifesting the Life of Your Dreams Living a Radically Engaged Life
Ann Sanfelippo is the #1 international best- Marianne MacKenzie is a sought-after life and
selling author of Wealth Attraction Formula; business coach who supports business women
a speaker, coach, and founder of The Wealth in living a Radically Engaged LifeTM. She is
Attraction Academy, a company dedicated to passionate, with a capital “P”, about supporting
providing women with the tools and resources you as you step into your power as a Radically
they need to manifest an abundant life of their Engaged Woman to live and work with deeper
dreams—financially, emotionally and spiritually. meaning and purpose, develop a new mindset
She has studied the philosophies of the most that supports your desires and create practices
powerful influencers in the world, both past and and tools to sustain your new lifestyle so you can
present; these incredible mentors helped propel play even bigger in business and life. Through
her to outstanding success. Now, she shares Marianne’s powerful Radically Engaged LivingTM
her formula with the world. Learn more at www. personal and group coaching programs, high-
WealthAttractionAcademy.com and download impact events, and corporate and virtual speaking
The Wealth Attraction Tool Kit. appearances, clients experience what it feels like
www.WealthAttractionAcademy.com to shift from living on autopilot to living a Radically
Engaged Life. Visit MarianneMacKenzie.com and
download your Live YOUR Radically Engaged
Life” E-Book & Audio.

18 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


FEATURED CONTRIBUTORS

KELLEY GRIMES, MSW JENN GRANNEMAN MARCIA MARINER DEBORAH KEVIN

MERYL DAVIDS LANDAU DR. MARGARET PAUL SUZANNE SCURLOCK-DURANA MAL DUANE

BAILEY GADDIS AMANDA HINMAN

Share
YOUR WISDOM! CONTACT US TODAY TO LEARN ABOUT OUR
AWESOME CONTRIBUTOR OPPORTUNITIES!
WITH OUR READERS

19
LETTER EDITOR
”Today is a new day. Today is a day for you
FROM THE to begin creating a joyous, fulfilling life.”
LOUISE HAY

Welcome to the Oct/Nov “Feminine Wisdom for Your


Journey” issue of Aspire Magazine
“I claim my power and move beyond all limitations.”
– LOUISE HAY

Louise Hay left a legacy.


A legacy of love, charity, and self-empowerment.
This one amazing woman changed the lives of millions of people. What a legacy.
She was able to do so because she claimed her power, followed her heart, and committed to being a
beacon of light despite the struggles that life threw at her.
Here’s what I’ve learned from Louise’s work: We all have that power within us. Yes, that includes you!
We can all make a ripple of positive change in the lives of others in our own unique way by showing up
fully in our own lives—even when it feels uncomfortable.
October is my birthday month! To celebrate, I’ve committed to doing things and making choices that
helps me own my power, stretches my comfort zone, and that embraces my courageous heart.
On October 24th, Inspired Living Publishing will release Courageous Hearts: Soul-Nourishing Stories to
Inspire You to Embrace Your Fears and Follow Your Dreams. Thirty extraordinary women revisit the
moments in which they made the most courageous choices of their lives—the moments in which they
chose to live from their own truth and walk their own paths, no matter how frightening or uncertain
the way ahead appeared. In the face of overwhelming fear, vulnerability, and opposition, these brave
women chose to act from their deepest soul convictions, honor the calling of their courageous hearts,

Connect with me!


and step into a more authentic and empowered reality in their own lives.
Their stories will inspire you to believe in the power within and to embrace your courageous heart.
m/
http://www.Facebook.co I invite you to take time for yourself today! Grab a cup of tea, or a glass of wine, and tap into the

lindajoyins pir es wisdom and expertise you’ll find throughout our current issue.

Live an Inspired Life!


ajoy
https://twitter.com/lind

LINDA JOY
http://pinterest.com/ Publisher
lindajoyinspire/

20 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH
A Beacon of Light

Louise
Hay BY LINDA JOY

L ouise Hay changed the trajectory


of my life.
A little over twenty-five years ago, I was a
single mom on welfare struggling to find my
path, purpose, and happiness. One day
feeling low and ungrounded I found myself
at the local library more for the quiet and
solitude than to look for any particular book.
As I approached one row of books, a book
literally jumped out at me and fell to the
floor. As I picked it up to place it back on the
shelf I had no idea that it would change the
trajectory of my life.

That book was Louise’s


“You Can Heal Your Life.”

22 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


Louise became my mentor and teacher and taught me,
through her words, books, and mission, what self-

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH


love was, and how powerful our thoughts are.

It was my very first personal development I grabbed a friend, Donna Cravotta, and
book. I inhaled every word. It became my headed to the big city. It was a Who’s Who
trail guide to a new path. A path of hope, of personal development royalty, including
happiness, and possibility. It was the catalyst Cheryl Richardson, Reid Tracy, Brian Weiss
that put me on the spiritual and personal among others.
development path. Louise became my
mentor and teacher and taught me, through
her words, books, and mission, what self-
love was and how powerful our thoughts are.

As my path unfolded, in 2006, I was led to


start Aspire Magazine. I birthed the vision in
my heart to publish a magazine that inspired
women to live from the inside out and
reminded them of the truth of who they are.
In 2010, I founded Inspired Living Publishing,
a boutique hybrid publishing company
dedicated to publishing uplifting and inspiring
books for women, and by women.
As the event was winding down, I gave
Today, eleven years later, I still pinch myself Louise with a goodbye hug. I thanked her
that because of Louise’s influence in my life for being such an influence in my life, and
I’ve found my passion, purpose, and joy. shared that she was the catalyst that led
It’s been an honor to have Louise grace the me to birth Aspire Magazine and Inspired
cover of Aspire Magazine twice in the past, Living Publishing. Fully present as always,
and to have featured many of Hay House Louise held my hands in hers, looked me
authors over the years. straight in the eye, and whispered …. “Keep
shining your light, Linda. The world needs
Meeting my spiritual mentor was your message.”

a day I’ll never forget. I will, Louise. I will.

I’ll never forget the day in 2010 that I received Thank you for being such a light in my life
the invitation to attend Louise’s intimate New and the worlds.
York book signing. Life had come full circle.

23
6 of My Favorite Louise

24 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


Hay Quotes

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH


About Louise Hay:
Louise, the author of the
international bestseller You
Can Heal Your Life, is a
metaphysical lecturer and
teacher with more than 40
million books sold worldwide.
For more than 30 years,
Louise has helped people
throughout the world discover
and implement the full
potential of their own creative
powers for personal growth
and self-healing. Louise is
the founder and chairman
of Hay House, Inc., which
disseminates books, CDs,
DVDs, and other products
that contribute to the healing
of the planet. Read
Online!
Visit www.LouiseHay.com.

25
LIVING a
Soul-Hearted
LIFE

Practicing the
5 Steps of
Compassionate
DETACHMENT BY DR. DEBRA REBLE

W e have chosen an extraordinary


time to be here on earth to assist in the healing
and expansion of human consciousness.
Yet, in such turbulent times, it’s important
that we practice compassionate detachment
more than ever. For many of us, it’s not easy
being so open and sensitive to the needs
and energies of the world. Like sponges, our
energy fields are porous and prone to soak
up the energies of others. And because we
take in the build-up of negative energies of
others, we often feel compassion fatigue or
empathy overload.

Practicing compassionate detachment


shows us a broader, more spiritual
perspective on life. It opens up the intimate
space of relationship so we can connect

26 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


Practicing compassionate detachment
shows us a broader, more spiritual

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH


perspective on life.
with the expanded dimension of our being, we feel stable and empowered. We can
and the being of another. The practice of communicate that we love a person while
compassion involves empathy, which leads still refusing to play a part in their drama.
to a relationship between equals, rather For instance, when someone wants to vent
than sympathy, which leads to a hierarchical about a particular issue, we can listen with
relationship in which one person feels sorry an open heart but still refrain from taking on
for the other. their negativity, giving unsolicited advice,
or trying to fix the situation. This allows us
To be empathic toward others, even those to provide loving support yet remain calm,
who are mean, deceitful, or hurtful, requires nonreactive, and nonjudgmental.
that we open our hearts and feel compassion
for ourselves, dissolving the walls we have Empathy is compassion in action. When
erected around our hearts for self-protection. someone is stuck in a dark hole, empathy
Vulnerability lays the groundwork for empathy. is empowering them by offering a hand, and
Science has demonstrated that humanity is supporting them while they find a way to
united by empathy, a phenomenon that has get themselves out. By contrast, sympathy
been observed in children as young as one is jumping into the dark hole with them and
year of age. Research shows that, when we feel commiserating about how bad it is in the hole.
compassion, the most sophisticated thought
centers in our brains light up, indicating that
we are hardwired to be compassionate toward
To hold the space of love
others. Compassion brings our brain into and release any negative
harmony with the vibration of love from our heart
center. Therefore, the more compassionate energies, you can practice
we are with ourselves, the more our capacity
for empathy increases so we can respond to
these five steps of compas-
the emotional needs of others. sionate detachment:
Being compassionate toward others, Retreat: If you’ve ever attended a gathering
however, does not require us to engage or shared an office with an energy bully, you
in any unhealthy physical or emotional may have felt your eyes get heavy, sleepy, or
experiences they may be having. In fact, dry, noticed your mood shifting from positive
compassion requires that we remove to negative, or suddenly become irritated or
ourselves from their physical process, agitated. It’s important when you feel these
and instead support from a place where symptoms that you pause, check in with

27
When we set Raise: Raise your energy vibration by
opening your heart and surrounding the
healthy energetic person or situation in love. Love brings you
into non-resonance with lower vibrations,
boundaries and hold and you can radiate love from a distance
without compromising your own energies.
others accountable As a conduit of love, you can strive to see
“negative nellies” as catalysts to elevate
for their choices, we your energy and engage your highest self.

become more loving, Re-enter: When you re-enter the negative


environment, do so slowly, with loving intent,
compassionate people. and conscious awareness as to which of
your buttons are likely to be pushed again.
Make sure you are fully centered. Use
the “broken record technique,” which is
repeating a neutral statement to reduce any
emotional volatility. Keep your interactions
yourself, and give yourself permission to
short and sweet, end conversations swiftly
remove yourself from the situation as soon
and with compassion, and lessen the time
as possible. You can get some fresh air,
and duration you spend in toxic situations.
tell the person you will call them back, or
drift over to mingle with people who give off It’s possible to be compassionate and
positive energy. You can radiate love from accepting of another person while still
a distance without losing yourself. Notice holding that person accountable for their
how this practice beneficially affects your words and behavior. One of the barriers to
physical and emotional well-being. practicing compassionate detachment is
the fear of setting boundaries and holding
Re-evaluate: When encountering people accountable. Not holding them
negativity, ask yourself, “How can this accountable for their unhealthy choices,
interaction with this person help me however, actually impedes their capability
spiritually grow?” or “What is this person or to help themselves and spiritually grow.
situation showing me about myself?” Every
exchange in life―good, bad, or neutral― In reality, when we set healthy energetic
is an opportunity to become free of your boundaries and hold others accountable
fear-based patterns and self-sabotaging for their choices, we become more loving,
behaviors, and open your heart in love. compassionate people. When we take full
responsibility for every choice in our lives,
Restore: After any negative encounter or we cannot be a victim, only a co-creator.
situation, it’s crucial that you detox the lower Above all, when we set compassionate
vibrational energies you have absorbed. boundaries, we love and value ourselves by
Taking deep cleansing breaths, showering, showing others how we wish to be treated.
and spending time in nature are simple Then we can be responseable even in
ways to clear your energy system. All of the most challenging circumstances, and
these will ground you and bring you back attract everyone and everything we need to
into energetic balance and resonance. manifest a more fulfilling reality.

28 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


Separating our reactions from someone perspective; this gives us detachment as
else’s gives us the detachment we need well as the capacity to feel compassion for
to stop taking their reactions personally or even those who deceive or hurt us. “A truly
blaming them for ours. One way to remain compassionate attitude toward others does

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH


compassionate and responsive is to remind not change even if they behave negatively or
ourselves that the other person is going hurt you,” says His Holiness the Fourteenth
through their own process of self-discovery, Dalai Lama.
which likely has nothing to do with us. We
must trust that they are on their own soul’s Showing compassion for others’ struggles
journey, and are creating the scenarios they and suffering allows us to discover valuable
need to spiritually transform. information that may alter our perspective
on their plight. For instance, instead of
Sustaining healthy energetic boundaries judging a person who neglected or abused
increases our ability to infuse difficult us as a child, we can investigate how they,
situations with positive energy―and too, may have been neglected or abused,
ultimately, to transform them. In choosing and compassionately love the child they
to respond rather than react, we can diffuse were when they were hurt like us. Profound
a negative situation and create a neutral compassion opens our hearts to empathy,
space in which the other person doesn’t forgiveness and love, even to perfect
have anything to come up against. Without strangers.
something to react to, they are more likely to
calm down and even become aware of their Practicing compassionate detachment
own reaction. Providing them with a mirror gives us the power to transcend anyone
of love in which to see themselves helps or anything that doesn’t originate
them gain awareness of their behaviors. from the energy of love.
Read
Thus, holding them accountable for their Online!
actions actually opens the possibility for
unconditionally loving interactions with them
in the future. Dr. Deb Reble - Consciously merging
her practical tools as a psychologist with
An additional benefit of showing kindness her intuitive and spiritual gifts, Intuitive
and compassion to others for their self- Psychologist Dr. Debra Reble empowers
discoveries is that whenever such people women to connect with
come into our lives, they also reveal their hearts and live
something about ourselves that we need to authentically and supports them in breaking
either release or transform. So when we fear through their energetic and spiritual blocks
getting hooked into any person’s negative to self-love. Debra is the International Best-
patterns we can also observe ourselves selling author of Being Love: How Loving Yourself Creates Ripples of
to discover our own possible negative Transformation in Your Relationships and the World (Inspired Living
patterns related to the exchange. Then we Publishing) and the author of Soul-Hearted Partnership: The Ultimate
can compassionately bless the person and Experience of Love, Passion, and Intimacy, which garnered four book
release the situation to resolve on its own. awards including the Eric Hoffer award, as well as a contributing
author to many best-selling books. Debra is a sought after speaker
When we open our hearts, withhold judgment, and media guest and is the host of the popular Soul-Hearted Living
and remain nonreactive, we experience Podcast on iTunes. Visit www.DrDebraReble.com and claim your
situations from a spiritually elevated complimentary 4-part Sacred Meditation Series today.

29
LIVING A
Radically Engaged
LIFE™

SAYING YES!
TO A DIFFERENT FUTURE
It All Begins With A Decision

I
BY MARIANNE MACKENZIE

tell my clients “It all begins with a decision . . . Your decision to say YES to a different
future.” It’s true. . . . And sometimes life just makes the choice for you.

I’m a radical coach, and I didn’t just decide to be radical, my experiences in life have guided
me on a pretty crazy path at times. In order to satisfy my seemingly insatiable desire for
understanding I have been dished up some pretty awesome learning experiences disguised
as life hurdles, challenges and tragedies. I’m radical because of the approach and perspective
that I take around business and life. I just don’t see life the way most people do and I give
you permission to question the heck out everything as well. And in the face of it all I have not
only survived . . . I have THRIVED and I continue to face challenges and refuse to just be a
survivor of life.

30 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


YOU, BEAUTIFUL, ARE A ReL WOMAN
JUST WAITING TO THRIVE!

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH


I desire to THRIVE. I would like to share with you the first 2 of
my RēL Woman! critical components that
I would bet that you desire to thrive too. will allow you the ability to continue to create
the life and business you dream about while
Have you found life is a continuation of sustaining your success through building a
challenges and lessons and hurdles? As strong foundation. Once you see the value
soon as you have one thing under control or of each one, creating your own plan to more
figured out then another seems to fall apart fully engage in your life becomes a priority.
or break down taking you on a constant
spiral downward. It is one of the most heart
wrenching things to see another woman
struggle when it really doesn’t have to be
1 SELF-AWARENESS
this hard. So just what is self-awareness? In Radically
Engaged Living self-awareness is defined as:
The problem isn’t that you aren’t smart --
you are brilliant and resourceful and truly
phenomenal. The problem is that because SELF-AWARENESS:
of all these attributes there is also the belief The consciousness to really understand
that you “should” know how to fix it or how what makes you tick . . . what you really
to just “get over it”. Maybe if you just try desire. What brings you deep joy and
harder! the awareness of how to align your
desires with your unique and individual
Look sister, if you could have done it alone, integrity . . . your truth.
you would have already. Right?
THE COSMIC 2 X 4
As women we carry a false belief that if we We have the opportunity (heck, many
try hard enough we will be able to figure it opportunities) to WAKE UP! to our life.
out on our own. Life is meant to be shared . Usually people that are AWAKE have been
. . and the journey is so much sweeter when hit hard by the cosmic 2 x 4. They have faced
we open our hearts (and ears and eyes) to serious life tragedies or major challenges and
learn from and with each other. have lived through it . . . not to survive, they
have figured out how to thrive. These soul
It is in how we choose to approach these jarring experiences crack us open and leave
obstacles that makes all the difference. us raw and exposed to the harshness of life.
Our approach depends greatly on the self- It is almost as if we are forced to face the
awareness that you have along with your delusion that we have created about life. We
mindset and the tools and techniques that are cracked open to really see ourselves and
you have collected along the journey of life. the world around us through a new reality.

31
These experiences are life changing. It
is almost as if to move from survival to 2 MINDSET
thriving we are forced to face our personal
responsibility in the choices of our life. Often Mindset is a buzzword that seems to be
we change friends, rethink relationships, flying around these days. It is however
change careers and reevaluate health so much more than just sunshine and
choices. This takes most people years positive thoughts. In Radically Engaged
to go from Waking Up! to actually being Living™ mindset is defined as:
AWAKE. During this process we develop
self-awareness. It comes at a cost and with
much pain and suffering and ends up with MINDSET:
the sweetness called being AWAKE. Life Knowing the proven perspective to
has new meaning and purpose. open yourself (which in turn opens your
life experiences and opportunities) to
The other way to gain self-awareness I will possibility. This information we are NOT
call the short-cut. taught through our schools and society.
It is deep . . . complex and IMPERATIVE
to living Radically Engaged.
THE SHORTCUT.
The shortcut is achieved when you follow
When I think of mindset I see it as if everyone
a proven path to creating the results you
had a pair of sunglasses on as we walk
want: with expert guidance. In this case it
through and experience life. Each of us
is a guided journey through WAKING UP! to
wears our very own pair, uniquely our own.
become AWAKE to your life and her magical
These glasses are like filters that only allow
mystical journey.
certain perspectives to be seen. So what I
see is different than what you may see.
While I call this the shortcut, please know that
it takes years and I believe it is an ongoing
If we have cloudy lenses on our glasses then
unfolding that will continue to occur throughout
we can’t see the vivid beauty of the world
your entire life. The difference between the
around us . . . everything we see is cloudy
Cosmic 2 x 4 approach and the Shortcut is
and fuzzy. Through life we have choices to
that there is awareness. Awareness allows
change our glasses for ones that can SEE
you to be awake to what is happening in
the world more clearly. We can choose ones
your life so that you don’t get broadsided.
that fit us better, feel good or we can choose
Challenges still happen, however you have
to wear the ones that are popular and the
the ability to stay in alignment with your own
trend. . . you know the ones someone else
integrity, with your own heart’s desires and
told us we should be wearing.
make choices from that foundational center.
Life takes on a honey sweetness that seems
Mindset is the ability to know what glasses
to slightly flavor even the most mundane
you are wearing and to make a different
aspects of life.
choice to continue enhancing your life
experience. It takes courage because seeing
The pain and suffering we often experience
life through clear lenses can be challenging.
is caused by being out of alignment with
You however are oh so courageous. And a
ourselves. Without knowing yourself
success mindset requires you to be wearing
how could you possibly know how to stay
the glasses that see the possibility of success.
in alignment?

32 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


All it takes is taking that first step, in courage
and belief in yourself. When you show up
in your life with self-awareness, a success
mindset, a clear strategy and surround

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH


yourself with a supportive tribe everything
moves in sync and the flow of opportunity
and life is like a beautifully orchestrated
dance. For right now I encourage you
to connect to our RēL Woman TRIBE on
Facebook and start to feel the difference
of being connected to likeminded and RēL
Women.

Life is meant to be lived BIG and yet nobody


can do this for you. It requires you deciding
to make a change, to engage in your life in
new and expanded ways. Until next time.

XO,

When we choose to see truth . . . our truth -


we give ourselves the gift of freedom. The
best part is that mindset and self-awareness
Marianne
together create an amazingly powerful P.S. Click HERE to find out where you
foundation to create and live your life from. are now on the journey of living
AND they both can be taught! radically engaged. Read
Online!

So, what are the other 2 components to


Living Radically Engaged? Marianne MacKenzie - Marianne MacKenzie
is a sought-after life and business coach
STRATEGY: who supports business women in living a
The tools to create an action plan to get Radically Engaged LifeTM. She is passionate,
you from where you are to where you with a capital “P”,
desire to be. Structure to create a strong about supporting
unshakable foundation and processes you as you step into your power as a Radically
and systems to keep it running once Engaged Woman to live and work with deeper
you create it. meaning and purpose, develop a new mindset
that supports your desires and create practices and tools to sustain
TRIBE: your new lifestyle so you can play even bigger in business and life.
The right people around you to help you Through Marianne’s powerful Radically Engaged LivingTM personal
achieve your dreams as well as sustain and group coaching programs, high-impact events, and corporate
your new level. The people around and virtual speaking appearances, clients experience what it feels like
us play such a key role in our ability to to shift from living on autopilot to living a Radically Engaged LifeTM.
sustain our new way of living. If you Claim your free Live YOUR Radically Engaged Life” E-Book & Audio at
don’t have it now . . . it’s time to create it! www.MarianneMacKenzie.com

33
MANIFESTING
the Lifeof Your

Dreams
DREAMS

Celebrate Yourself and


Accelerate Your
BY ANN SANFELIPPO

I f you’re anything like me, you’re driven.


You don’t stop at one mountain; you want
to climb them all! One challenge is barely in
your rear view mirror before you’re speeding
along to the next one.

When you’re working hard to create your


dream life, it can be tempting to go, go, go,
all the time, especially once you see your
efforts starting to pay off. Since you are 100
percent responsible for creating your own
reality, you might as well get to it, right?

But there’s a downside to that kind of drive.


When you are constantly looking to the
horizon, anticipating what’s next, you can
miss where you are right now. You might
even become blind to the good things that

34 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


When we take the time to celebrate our accomplishments,
and acknowledge each achievement (whether large or

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH


small) in the process of our reality creation, we send
out a vibration of gratitude.

are already happening all around you, time to celebrate our accomplishments, and
because you’re so busily engaged with your acknowledge each achievement (whether
brighter future. large or small) in the process of our reality
creation, we send out a vibration of gratitude.
And, let’s face it: if you’re leaping hurdles Essentially, our gratitude tells the Universe,
and breaking the status quo to reach your “I want more of this, please!”
goals, it would be a shame not to celebrate
the milestones you’ve already reached! When we take the time to celebrate, it’s like
saying “thank you” to a friend who got you
The process of creating your dream life the gift for which you’ve been yearning. You
starts with desire, which informs vision. wouldn’t snatch such a present out of your
Vision can only become reality through friend’s hands, set it aside, and ask, “What’s
action. Accountability helps you make next?” That would not only be rude, it would
greater strides through inspired action. tell your friend in no uncertain terms that her
These are the first four keys to accelerating gift wasn’t good enough to merit your full
wealth, health, and happiness in your life. gratitude and attention.

The fifth and final key in my method is So, if you wouldn’t treat a friend that way,
celebration, and it’s more important to why would you do it to the Universe?
creating your reality and realizing your
dreams than you think. Just because you asked for your current
reality, and created it with your desire, vision,
Why Celebration Rules Creation action, and accountability, that doesn’t mean
that you shouldn’t be grateful for it!
Celebration involves presence. It involves Just like the friend who gave you that
gratitude. It involves pausing your push treasured gift, the Universe has conspired to
forward for long enough to look around and create your reality according to what you’ve
say, “Wow! Look at this amazing reality I’ve been asking for.
already created!”
When you extend the same gratitude to the
The Universe is attuned to, and responds Universe as you do to your friends, you will
to, our personal vibration. When we take the cultivate a constant vibration of appreciation

35
and love. This will raise your overall vibration, you are literally tuning yourself in to the
and bring you closer to the vision you hold Universal channel of “Yes! Thank you! I’ll
for your ideal life. have more of that!”

There’s another side to this, too: the side of


what happens inside us when we celebrate Celebrate Your Wins
our own success.
How you celebrate each step toward your
Even if we have already been treating dream life depends on what feels like
the Universe as a friend, how about the “celebration” to you. It’s all about creating
way we treat ourselves? When we breeze that vibration of gratitude.
past our own accomplishments without
acknowledging them, we are essentially Your celebration doesn’t have to be
saying, “What I’ve created is not big enough, flamboyant or expensive―in fact, if part
grand enough, or just plain enough to merit of your vision for your dream life includes
my full attention and gratitude.” We give getting out of debt or getting a handle on
ourselves the cold shoulder that we would your finances, costly celebrations might
never give to our friends. This creates an actually set you back and re-trigger a
overall vibration of “never enough”―which, lack mentality.
as we know, will prompt our amazingly
sensitive Universe to give us exactly what Nor does your celebration have to involve
we’re broadcasting: never enough. others (unless you want it to). It simply needs
to allow you to revel in your accomplishment
When we don’t stop to celebrate, we can lose and hold the intention of honoring your
track of why we are working so hard in the creation process and what has shown up for
first place. We can get so caught up in the you as a result of your desire, vision, action,
work of creating our lives that the creation and accountability.
itself becomes secondary. But if we don’t
pause to enjoy the fruits of our labor, we will
soon become burned out and disillusioned.
Here are a few ideas for
The creations we worked so hard to manifest celebrating your wins:
will start to feel like burdens instead, and
our optimism will nosedive into bitterness. • Take a hot bath with candles and essential
However, if we take the time to enjoy the oils. Focus on how amazing you feel about
journey, with rest stops, celebrations, and your recent accomplishments.
feelings of gratitude along the way, we will • Get together with friends and toast one
stay attuned to the essence of our vision for another’s accomplishments.
a wealthy, healthy, happy life.
• Take yourself out for tea, coffee, or a meal
as a treat.
This is why celebration is every bit as vital
to the process of creating your life as your • Book your dream vacation.
desire, vision, actions, and accountability. • Open that nice bottle of wine you’ve been
When you celebrate your manifesting wins, saving for a “special occasion.”

36 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


However you choose to acknowledge
your wins, make sure you do it regularly.
(“Regularly” could mean monthly, weekly,

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH


or even daily.) The more you connect to the
energy of what you’ve created in your life, the
more inspired your future creations will be!

Remember, your soul already holds the


greatest, most amazing vision for
your life. It knows the way to grow. Read
Online!

• Buy yourself flowers, balloons, or another Ann Sanfelippo - Sought-after Success


small celebratory gift.
Coach and International Bestselling Author,
• Make a list of your successes. Decorate Ann Sanfelippo has been traveling the world
it to your liking and post it where you can for over 15 years as a Motivational Speaker
see it every day. and Master Trainer for some of the biggest

• Take five minutes to sit quietly and breathe. names in personal development and
wealth creation. Ann studied the success
Focus on inhaling gratitude, and exhaling
philosophies of some of the most powerful influencers in the world,
contentment.
created her own 7-figure lifestyle business by the time she was 40
• Shareyour accomplishments with your and has helped thousands of individuals create
mentor or mastermind group. the wealth and abundance they desire.

• Take a whole day off! Following the calling of her soul, Ann recently
founded the Wealth AttractionTM Academy
to provide women with the empowering tools, programs and
coaching that they need to manifest the abundant life of their
dreams—financially, emotionally, and spiritually. Merging her

“If we take concrete business and success skills with the Law of Attraction,
the time to the power of beliefs, mindset and more, Ann empowers women
the journe enjoy to accelerate their health, wealth and happiness. Learn more at
y, with rest www.WealthAttractionAcademy.com.
celebration stops,
s, and feeli
of gratitud ng
e along the s
we will stay way,
attuned to
essence of the
our vision
wealthy, he for a
althy, happ
y life.”
Ann Sa
nfeli ppo

37
Allowing What IS
Even When It’s
UNCOMFORTABLE BY LARA JAYE

W hen I glance back briefly over my


life’s journey, I can easily see behind me
a string of disappointments. Suffering.
Pain. Sadness. Lost love. I also see a
string of wonderful surprises and blessings
interwoven to make up my entire life’s
tapestry. Which one I choose to focus on
determines how I feel at any given moment.

Sometimes, all I see and feel is what is


happening in this moment. If I’m not careful,
those unmet desires and disappointments
could send me into a curled up ball, or
even propel me to give up. I’ve given up
to the disappointment many, many times.
Sometimes, several times a day!

To be disappointed means to be discouraged


by the failure of one’s hopes or expectations.
When you’re feeling down about a recent
expectation or failed hope, life can seem
awfully dismal. Hope gives you something
to look forward to, to believe in, even trust.
When that hope is shattered and the shards
are everywhere, the question is, what now?

38 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


A
“What if we let How would that feel? What would happen
if we didn’t react to the drama playing out

whatever is bothering around us? We allowed it to be.

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH


By answering these simple, yet complex
us to just be, not questions, as difficult moments greet us, you
will bring Your Soul’s Calling to the forefront.
judging it as good or You will no longer be able to deny the true
you. You will know who you are and why
bad? It just is.” you are here on earth. You will allow what
is to be. You will KNOW you are ENOUGH.
You will no longer judge yourself or others.
–LARA JAYE Instead, you’ll embrace the perfect moment
as it is, no matter the emotion it produces.

IT’S IMPORTANT TO:


little spark of hope inside was the only thing
that kept me going on some days. It felt like •
Recognize when we are adding to
that was all I had. On numerous occasions, the drama.
my spark felt doused and no embers • Notice what is happening around us
remained. The key word here is FEEL/ and inside of us.
FELT. I have a friend who says feelings • Live in the moment.
are like farts… they come and go quickly!
Something we need to remember this when •
Recognize resistance or fear, and
we are having an emotional moment. feel it.
• Allow what is to be and not judge it
What happens when someone lets us as good or bad.
down? What happens when we lose our
hope? Or expectations aren’t met? If you Lately, I seem to have to answer these
are like me, you throw things around and questions almost daily. My roller coaster life
scream for a while! Just kidding, but I bet it challenges and new business have pushed
would feel good. As I move through difficult me to pursue my soul’s calling on a level
times, I look back see a clearer reflection I can hardly comprehend. My bestselling
of my journey—all of it, the pain, and the book, More Than Enough, almost didn’t get
pleasure. The sadness and the joy. written. The fear inside of me about showing
the world whom I truly am, almost won.
My whole experience makes up who I am The resistance I felt to finishing this project
today. Without one, the other can’t exist. It’s nearly caused me to give up. Because I’ve
in the middle of the opposites that I try to been there before, it was easy to recognize
reside. Centered, balanced, focused, not the pattern.
being attached to either/ or. Just being. What
if we let whatever is bothering us to just be, One morning as I was finishing a chapter
and didn’t judge it as good or bad? It just is. of the book, a fear overtook me that I can’t

39
explain. Of course, instead of writing, I to do this!’ And, suddenly, there was a
read emails. In God’s perfect timing, Dr. beautiful baby. While she didn’t know
Christiane Northrup’s email newsletter how to do it with her intellect, her
came through with these words of wisdom:
body, and nature knew just what to do.
You know how to do it, too. And your
To birth something new, whether that’s
intellect may be the last thing to catch
a baby, a book, a seminar or talk, a
on. Have faith. Have courage. Keep
new relationship, or a new career,
breathing. And simply know that you’re
you have to have courage and faith.
programmed for new beginnings.
You also have to be ready to embrace
change. Change is tough for many. As
humans, we really want things to stay Dr. Northrup’s statement, “I can’t do this! I
the same. We’re creatures of habit— can’t do this! I don’t know how to do this!”
and so am I—even for small things. replayed over and over in my head. That’s
You may not be aware of this, but it’s when I combined my own advice with Dr.
Northrup’s encouragement, got still, and
possible to give birth in an orgasmic
began to recognize and notice what was
way. Believe it or not, the energy that
happening for me. I stopped verbally abusing
gets the baby in gets the baby out. And myself for feeling the way I did. I honored
that’s true biologically, but it’s also true what was happening, and allowed it to just
in your personal life. be. Then, I had to make a decision. Was I
going to hide the rest of my life and deny the
To tap into this incredible and powerful world my gifts OR was I going to finish this
energy, you’ll want to learn to ‘surf with’ book and live out my soul’s calling?
change. When you feel resistance to
Obviously, I chose the latter!
change, be present with it. Grieve for
what’s no longer going to be there. © 2017. Lara Jaye. An excerpt from More Than
Enough: Discover Your Limitless Potential and
That’s the only way to usher all the Live Your Bravest Dream. Read
good stuff in. You have to feel it and Online!

move forward to give birth to the new


thing. Remember that when the good Lara Jaye - Best-selling author, spiritual mentor, radio show host,
stuff comes in, it brings in joy. And joy and speaker Lara Jaye passionately inspires others to transform
can flush out the loneliness, the fear, themselves to realize their biggest dreams. She teaches her clients
and the other ‘stuff’ that is no longer how to shine light into their darkest corners, release stale patterns
that keep them stuck, and discover their unique purpose. In her
serving you. I have stood by while
#1 Amazon best-selling book, More Than Enough: Discover Your
hundreds of women gave birth to Limitless Potential and Live Your Bravest Dream, Lara guides others
beautiful, normal babies. Just before through change.
the time to start pushing came, nearly
Learn more at www.LaraJaye.com and be sure to claim the “You are
every woman would say, ‘I can’t do
MORE Than Enough Gift Set while you’re there.
this! I can’t do this! I don’t know how

40 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


HEALTH & WELLNESS
Adventure
EMBRACING LIFE’S TRANSITIONS AS

BY KELLEY GRIMES, MSW

“Life is either a great


adventure or nothing.”
– HELEN KELLER

O ne thing we know for sure is that change happens constantly in our lives. Whether we are
aware of it or not, we are often in a process of transition. This transition may come in the form of
a new beginning, the struggle of a difficult ending, or some limbo stage in between one ending
and the next new beginning. Although there are some aspects of these life transitions that are
exciting, many people still experience stress and depending on the stage of the transition can
feel paralyzed by fear of the unknown or struggle with a myriad of other emotions.

42 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


If we are lucky, we will have many perspective bring new energy, ideas, and
opportunities in our lifetime to experience creativity. Living adventurously and stepping
a variety of transitions like going away outside of our comfort zones encourage us
to college, a new relationship, new job, to truly learn about ourselves and nurture our
new home, new member of the family and growth and potential. Reframing a transition

HEALTH & WELLNESS


different aspects of the process of aging. into an adventure allows us to feel like we
Although many of these experiences can have influence on the trajectory of our lives
be challenging, they always provide us rather than feeling like life happens to us.
opportunities to learn and grow. It is the Choosing to see transitions as adventures
meaning that we give to our experiences enables us to embrace life changes with
that shape how empowering the lessons or curiosity rather than getting stuck in fear
growth may feel or how disempowering or and judgment.
traumatic the changes may be perceived.
As Joseph Campbell reminds us, “we must
The wise Viktor Frankl wrote, “Suffering let go of the life we have planned so as
minus meaning equals despair,” and to accept the one that is waiting for us.”
I could not agree more. I have seen this
wisdom lived out with clients over the last Choosing to view a transition as an adventure
twenty-five years of my counseling career, opens us to the wonder of what could be
as well as in my own life. When we are not waiting for us, instead of resisting the
able to give our suffering meaning we feel change and clinging to our disappointment.
disempowered and victimized. Although I Embracing this perspective helps us
believe we must acknowledge and honor cultivate an open mind and open heart and
how we feel, we also need to recognize that provides an opportunity to deepen our trust
we have the power to fuel our own suffering in ourselves and faith in the universe.
or transform it based on the meaning we
give to it.
“There is no
I have witnessed the difference it makes when
rather than staying stuck in our suffering we
certainty; there is
find a new way of approaching it. I have
personally found the most empowering way
only adventure.”
to respond to change is to give it meaning by
embracing life’s transitions as adventures!
–ROBERTO ASSAGIOLLI
When we look at change as adventure -
a daring and exciting activity calling for If we know that change is the one thing we can
enterprise and enthusiasm – we are able to count on, why not cultivate a nurturing coping
move past our fear of the unknown and see strategy that will empower you regardless of
the blessings and opportunities that arise. how your life unfolds? Embracing transitions
as adventure is the key!
And I love that there are so many self-
nurturing aspects of adventure! To To see if this perspective could empower
begin with, breaking out of our everyday you, take a moment and reflect on a
routines and looking at our lives from a fresh transition you are currently going through.

43
THEN ASK YOURSELF THE “It takes a lot of
FOLLOWING QUESTIONS: courage to release
1 What meaning am I giving the familiar and
to this experience? seemingly secure,
to embrace the
2 What parts of the transition new. But there is
am I currently struggling
with? no real security in
what is no longer
3 What aspects of the change meaningful. There
do I feel excited or curious
about? is more security in
the adventurous
4 How can I embrace this and exciting, for in
situation with more joy and
movement there is
an adventurous spirit instead
of resisting the change? life and in change
there is power.””
5 What difference could this – ALAN COHEN
practice make in my life?
Reflecting on the answers to these
questions can provide you with increased
self-awareness and new insight to inspire Read
self-nurturing choices. Sometimes we only Online!
realize how attached we have become to our
expectations of how things are supposed
to be in our lives when change happens. Kelley Grimes, MSW - Kelley Grimes, MSW, is a counselor,
Our willingness to courageously embrace speaker,internationally best selling author and self-nurturing expert.
change by letting go of how we think things She ispassionate about empowering overwhelmed and exhausted
should be and opening to how they are individuals to live withmore peace, joy, and meaning through the
really unfolding is the most nurturing choice practice of self-nurturing. Kelleyalso provides professional and
we can make. leadership development to organizationsdedicated to making the
world a better place. She is married to an artist, hastwo empowered
Make the empowering choice to embrace daughters, and loves singing with a small women’s group. Learn more
at www.CultivatingPeaceandJoy.com and download your free Self-
your next transition as an adventure
Nurturing Mobile App.
and nurture peace in the world from the
inside out!

44 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


HEALTH & WELLNESS

45
5 Ways to
Help Your Child Cope with
Back-to-School
ANXIETY BY AMANDA HINMAN

I t’s that time of year again when kids


head back to school and your family
Sometimes the anxious feelings kids
experience are obvious, for example telling
settles into a new routine. As a mom of you they don’t like school or that they don’t like
four daughters, I understand what it’s like a particular aspect of the day. However, other
to feel a mixture of relief and uncertainty times their anxious feelings are more discreet,
heading into the school year. It’s time for such as a change in appetite, hypersensitivity
a new teacher, different classmates and to situations, aggressive or attention seeking
new expectations which creates anxiety behavior, change in interaction with friends or
for many kids about school. lack of interest in activities.

46 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


Once I invested in support and
started to feel energized, optimistic
and patient, this had a dramatic

HEALTH & WELLNESS


impact on my family.

I understand how overwhelming and Here are 5 ways to reduce


exhausting it feels to be a parent watching
your child struggle through anxiety. Years anxiety and help support
ago my oldest daughter’s anxiety intensified your child’s health this
to the point of causing daily seizures. school year:
My family’s life became very stressful. I
woke up worried and anxious, bracing
myself for another day of managing the
1 Get clear on what you
do want.
unmanageable. And this had a negative
You want your child to be healthy and
impact on everyone in my family. happy, but what does that mean? In my
experience, I wanted my daughter to stop
Finally, I realized something needed to having seizures, but beyond that I hadn’t
change. I needed to discover how to been thinking of specifics. It’s helpful to
reduce my own worry and find a way to specifically identify what behavior, emotions
help my daughter. I wanted to role model and actions are difficult for your child. When
confidence rather than add to the anxiety you know what you don’t want it’s easier
she was feeling. to identify what you do want.

‧‧
Once I invested in support and started to feel Some examples of what you do
energized, optimistic and patient this had a specifically want:
dramatic impact on my family. My daughter’s
 et ready for school without
G
health transformed, she went from being on 4
procrastination

‧‧
different seizure medications to manage her
anxiety to none, and my husband’s anxiety Healthy nourishment to fuel their
body for the day
and lifelong allergies cleared up as well.
 close friend that they feel
A


A large part of my journey to learn how to raise comfortable with
a truly Vibrant Child, included incorporating a Easier time doing math homework
holistic approach to reducing anxiety. Consistent sleep each night

47
Identifying specific experiences that will help
your child provides clarity on opportunities
to support them.

2 Eat foods that contain


fiber.
When a person feels anxious their body goes
into fight or flight response and releases a
flood of stress hormones including cortisol
and adrenaline. These hormones can build
up in the blood stream and cause reactions
in the body for days, months or years. In fact,
many symptoms such as hypersensitivity, to spend some quiet time with you before
allergic reactions, skin irritation, difficulty bed. Gary Chapman is the author of the
concentrating, digestive distress and book the 5 Love Languages and shares how
seizures are linked to excess levels of important it is to show love to our children
stress hormones in the body. Fiber is a in many ways AND especially important to
nutrient that works with the liver to detoxify

‧‧‧
show in the way that is most recognizable to
excess hormones from the blood. Fiber is them. The five love languages are:
found in fruits and vegetables minimally but
the greatest source of fiber per serving is  ords of affirmation
W

‧‧
in legumes, or beans. Black beans, pinto,
Physical touch
kidney, garbanzo, lentils, lima and more…
all kinds of beans provide a great way to Quality time
help clear your child’s body of excess Receiving gifts
stress hormones and reduce symptoms Acts of service
caused by anxiety. By consistently adding
a serving of beans to your family’s nutrition First, identify your child’s primary love
you can support the chemical balance in language and then make a list of ways
their body. A standard serving size is ½ cup you can demonstrate this consistently.
or 5 grams of fiber. An indication of their primary love language
is what they tend to demonstrate most often

3 Demonstrate your
child’s love language.
for others.

Every child feels loved in their own unique


way. One child’s heart sings when they
4 Reduce sensory
stimulation.
receive a special gift, another beams with Did you know that the average person today
pride with compliments about their dedication takes in more stimulation through their five
on the soccer field, and another may prefer senses in 24 hours than our parents did as

48 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


kids in an entire year? In today’s fast-paced and this can shift your child’s emotional
electronic environment we are surrounded state. Create a practice with your child and
by massive amounts of stimulation. Our empower them with a simple tool to shift their

‧‧‧
bodies process this stimulation through emotional state of being. Some examples of
our eyes, ears, nose, mouth and skin. ways to incorporate positivity are:

HEALTH & WELLNESS


The amount of stimulation often causes
stress response, which releases more of  hare a positive focus each day
S


the hormones mentioned earlier. Another Write down favorite memories
way to reduce the excess amount of
Sing songs together

‧‧
stress hormones is to consistently reduce
stimulation. Here are a few suggestions: Say prayers

 se unscented hand soaps,


U
shampoos, laundry detergent

‧‧
Allow car rides to be time for quiet
conversation instead of listening to
music or movies
Spend time each day in natural

‧‧
sunlight instead of artificial lighting
 emove screen time before bed
R
Reduce or eliminate highly spicy
and sugary foods
Give hugs, massages or The key to support your child’s health isn’t a
compression blankets to relax magical secret, but rather small intentional
and unwind choices made consistently. When I focused
on what I did want, had awareness of how

5 Practice appreciation to nourish our bodies, demonstrated love


uniquely, became aware of environmental
daily. stimulation and practiced appreciation, my
family’s health dramatically transformed.
Perhaps the largest source of anxiety is the
You too can experience ease
pattern of a person’s thoughts. When a child
and confidence with your child by Read
has a negative thought about something Online!
making simple choices.
at school that could go wrong it can very
quickly snowball into a big emotional block.
Each thought is energy created in the brain Amanda Hinman - Amanda is the Co-Founder of Hinman Holistic
and energy attracts similar energy. One Health Institute, Ltd. and works with moms who feel exhausted or stuck
negative thought leads to another negative because of a difficult situation with their child. She has a process to help
thought and so on. That is why proactively parents implement 5 healthy habits to improve their child’s physical and
focusing on positive aspects in life and things emotional health and make life easier. She is author of Vibrant Child: 7
Steps to Increase Your Child’s Health & Happiness. Visit www.Hinmans.
we appreciate is so powerful. When you
com and claim your FREE “Vibrant Child Video Series: 5 Ways to Improve
develop a daily practice of choosing positive
Your Child’s Health in 5 Days & Make Your Life Easier.”
thoughts you attract more positive thoughts

49
Dissolving FEAR
Through Acceptance
BY BAILEY GADDIS

A reverence is owed to fear — it holds the power to veer us


away from danger and it provides us opportunities to discover
and claim our courage, allowing us to grow in ways impossible
to access without a powerful impetus. So thanks, fear — we
honor you. Now we’re going to learn how to get you the
heck out of our way.

Fear can be a catalyst for growth only when it is


acknowledged and accepted, then shown the
door. When it becomes a festering guest it
begins swallowing up your reserves of health,
happiness, and sanity, sticking you in a “what-
if” paralysis. The oftentimes-false illusions that
give birth to fear (e.g., a misconception that
your body doesn’t know how to build and
birth a baby) are frequently left unchecked in
the vulnerable heart, mind, and body of the
pregnant mama. You may believe the fears
are there to protect you, maybe to “prepare
you for the worst.” But instead of helping
you prepare for an unlikely and unwanted
outcome, the stress produced by these
fears often creates the unwanted outcomes,
like pregnancy complications, medical
interventions, or postpartum depression.

50 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


The unknown sound you hear at night is
much scarier than opening the door, peering You’re going to
outside, and seeing that the sound is just
your cat chasing its tail. You’re going to open the door and
open the door and get to know fear. You’re
get to know fear.

HEALTH & WELLNESS


going to observe it, chat with it, and befriend
it so it’s no longer the hidden demon you
run from, but a known entity you know how You’re going to
to communicate with, know how to kindly
ask to leave when it has served its purpose. observe it, chat with
The first step is exploring the basic (illusory)
anatomy of fear, and how it affects your very it, and befriend it
real physical anatomy.
so it’s no longer
The Mind-Body Effects the hidden demon
of Fear you run from, but
The skeleton of fear is composed of
thoughts about a perceived (not usually a known entity
real) threat. The flesh of fear is composed of
the unpleasant emotions triggered by those you know how to
thoughts.
communicate with,
As soon as a fear is birthed in your mind,
the amygdala (a nut-shaped organ in the know how to kindly
core of your brain) sends a wake-up signal
to your autonomic nervous system, causing ask to leave when
your body to acknowledge the fear. The two
lanes of the autonomic nervous system, the it has served its
sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous
systems, are the boss ladies regulating your purpose.
internal organs, telling them what to do in
times of danger and peace. But sometimes,
they get a little confused.
response created in the body when facing
Without the sympathetic nervous system either the shark or the salad is the same, even
(the Panic Room), you might pet a great though one has the potential to cause death,
white shark. Without the parasympathetic while the other is just inconvenient. Death
nervous system (the Meditation Room), you and inconvenience both sound unpleasant,
might have a panic attack when the waiter but they’re way different. Unfortunately, the
brings you a salad instead of a hamburger. body does not know that they’re not rated the
The confounding thing is, the chemical same on the scale of seriousness.

51
Sympathetic Nervous into the Panic Room because it doesn’t know
what to do with birth. “This is an unknown,
System: The Panic this is scary — I don’t know what to do
with this. Yup, we’re probably going to die.”
Room None of these thoughts are based in reality,
yet they evoke a very real response in the
body, making birth more challenging, and
ironically, more dangerous. The quickest
way to achieve a room reassignment, from
the Panic Room to Meditation Room, is
deep breathing, which we’ll explore further
in chapter 17.

Parasympathetic
Nervous System:
The Meditation Room
When you’re shoved into the Panic Room, You should be living in your Meditation
you fight, take flight, or freeze. Because it Room for about 98 percent of your life.
is unlikely you will be in many situations You deserve to be living in your Meditation
where physically fighting is an appropriate Room for 98 percent of your life. This is your
(or legal) response, the modern-day “fight” restful space, where you get to feel all warm,
mechanism is to experience anxiety. A few fuzzy, and Zen-like. When you’re living in
other fun features of your Panic Room this space you calmly respond to non–life
are a triggering of stress, an increase in threatening stressors, your body is at ease,
blood pressure and heart rate, a slowing of all your organs (including the uterus!) are
digestion, a rerouting of blood to defense
organs (the uterus is not a defense organ),
and a decrease in your ability to think and
reason. Fun, right? But remember, your
body is not very good at deciphering an
actual threat (a rattlesnake staring at you)
from a perceived threat (the grocery store
not having the right brand of almond milk);
both situations can throw you into your
Panic Room.

When you’re moving through childbirth, receiving the ideal amount of blood and
a process that is natural and rarely life oxygen, your breathing is slow and steady,
threatening, the mind often sends the body and you feel really good. With the release

52 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


and absence of fear comes entry into your
Meditation Room. Delivering your baby in
Ninety-Second Release
this Meditation Room encourages gentle,
comfortable, and healthy (maybe even
blissful!) birthing.

HEALTH & WELLNESS


An important component of preventing your
fears from pulling you out of your Meditation
Room is letting them speak their piece so
they can leave you be.

Give a Voice to Your Fears


Tense situations are commonly diffused
after both parties freely express their
opinions. Conflicts with fears are no different It takes ninety seconds or less for an
— your fears need a nonjudgmental space emotion to be generated, chemically flow
in which to express themselves before they through the body, and be set free. If you
feel compelled to move on. That space say, “No! I do not want to feel sad right now.
is created when you stop trying to “fix” or I’m going to force myself to feel something
overcome a fear, and just sit with it in a else,” and resist the ninety-second surge
private location. Breathe into the emotions of sadness, you’ll need to process it again
and sensations that emerge as you allow and again until you surrender to it. You can
the fear to be there. Notice them and name handle anything for ninety seconds; set
them. For example, “I’m breathing into the your timer and breathe through it. Did you
tightness I feel in my chest when I think know surges during active labor often last
about my fear of pushing my baby out. I’m about ninety seconds, commonly peaking at
not trying to make it go away — it’s there — around thirty seconds, then diminishing?
I’m just acknowledging it.”
Excerpted from the book Feng Shui Mommy: Creating
Balance and Harmony for Blissful Pregnancy, Childbirth,
Resist the temptation to validate, discredit, and Motherhood. Copyright © 2017 by Bailey Gaddis.
Printed with permission from New World Library.
or conquer the fear — just be present with it. www.newworldlibrary.com.
As if you’re watching a movie, observe the
thoughts and images that come up as the Read
fear moves through you; none of it is wrong. Online!

Any resistance, tightness, sadness, shaking,


shame, pressure, anger, or any other form of
Bailey Gaddis - Bailey Gaddis is the author of Feng Shui Mommy. As a
emotional or physical expression is perfect,
Childbirth Preparation Educator, Birth Doula, and Hypnotherapist who
because that’s what’s coming up. It all has
works with pregnant women and their gorgeous offspring everyday, Bailey
to come up to be released, and this can all is fairly certain that “new baby smell” is the most enticing aroma on Earth.
happen in ninety seconds. Visit her online at www.baileygaddis.com.

53
The Reason Socializing DRAINS
Introverts More than
EXTROVERTS
A
BY JENN GRANNEMAN

young extrovert and introvert walk into a bar (and no, this is not a joke). It’s a Saturday
night, and the place is packed. A cover band is crooning away on stage, dozens of people are
talking loudly over mugs of beer, and it’s loud.

The extrovert takes in the scene and gets excited. He sees opportunities everywhere — an
attractive stranger at the bar, friends he can talk to, and the chance to cut loose and have fun.
He walks straight up to his group of friends, slaps one of them a high five, and orders a beer.

54 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


The introvert sees the situation differently.
He hangs back for a moment, looking
We all act introverted
around, taking everything in. Then, he walks
quietly up to his group of friends and waits
at times and extroverted
for one of them to acknowledge him before at others; according to

HEALTH & WELLNESS


he speaks. He feels a bit overwhelmed,
drowning in all the noise and activity, but he Carl Jung, the founder
tells himself to relax — this is supposed to
be fun. of analytical psychology,
And the introvert does have fun for a while. He there is no such thing
drinks a beer and catches up with a friend he
hadn’t seen since college. He even dances as a “pure” introvert
when the band plays his favorite song.
or extrovert. We all fall
But it doesn’t last. Soon, the introvert grows
tired. Not just “I could use a quick catnap” somewhere on the sliding
tired, but really tired. His brain has turned to
mush. He has trouble spitting out sentences. scale of introversion/
His whole body feels physically fatigued.
extroversion.
He’s getting an introvert hangover.

He glances over at the extrovert, who is there is no such thing as a “pure” introvert
doing shots with a pair of cute blondes he or extrovert. We all fall somewhere on the
apparently just met. The extrovert doesn’t sliding scale of introversion/extroversion.
show any signs of slowing down — in fact,
he looks even more energized than when And, socializing is actually draining for
they arrived. everyone eventually, according to a recent
study. Researchers found that three hours
Why do introverts get more drained by after socializing, participants reported higher
socializing than extroverts? levels of fatigue. Surprisingly, these effects
were found to be true for both introverts

Introverts and Extroverts and extroverts. This makes sense, because


socializing expends energy — you have to

Are Wired Differently talk, listen, and process what’s being said,
among other things.

Of course, this “introvert and extrovert in a Nevertheless, there are some very real
bar” example is a generalization. Not every differences between introverts and extroverts,
extrovert spends the weekend partying in and these differences come down to how
bars, and sometimes introverts live it up, they respond to rewards. Rewards are things
too. We all act introverted at times and like getting the phone number of an attractive
extroverted at others; according to Carl stranger, getting promoted at work, or even
Jung, the founder of analytical psychology, eating a delicious meal.

55
According to the experts I spoke with when something new. Job-wise, they seek a
writing my book, The Secret Lives of Introverts, calling that is more than just a paycheck.
extroverts have a more active dopamine They desire depth and intimacy in their
reward system than introverts. Dopamine is relationships, a connection that is mind-to-
a neurotransmitter, and it helps control the mind and heart-to-heart.
brain’s pleasure and reward centers. Having a This isn’t to say that all extroverts are
more active dopamine reward system means shallow and all introverts are deep. It’s not
that extroverts get more energized and excited that black and white. Sometimes extroverts
by the possibility of reward than introverts. So, pursue quiet, intrinsically rewarding
extroverts are more driven to, say, strike up activities, and sometimes introverts seek
a conversation with a stranger or hang out at status and other external rewards. I’d argue
the bar until last call. that a healthy, successful life for anyone
includes a mix of both the introvert’s way
Of course, introverts care about having and the extrovert’s way.
relationships, eating, and getting ahead at
work, too. But, simply put, introverts just When writing my
aren’t as interested in pursuing the things book, The Secret
that extroverts chase. Life of Introverts, I
asked introverts to
Having a less active dopamine reward tell me about the
system also means that introverts may find things that motivated
certain levels of stimulation — like noise and energized them.
and activity — to be punishing and tiring. They all mentioned
This explains why the introvert in our bar low-key activities,
example had fun for a little while, but felt like a solo shopping
drained as he became overstimulated. trip, a meaningful
conversation with a friend, finishing a good

Is It Bad to Care Less book, or expressing themselves through


art. If it weren’t for the introvert’s less

About Rewards? active dopamine reward system, introverts


probably wouldn’t be doing these types of
activities. The introvert’s way isn’t
Introverts don’t seek rewards to the same about chasing rewards, but rather Read
degree that extroverts do. Is this a bad about seeking meaning. Online!
thing? Not necessarily, in my opinion. We
all have that one friend who partied too hard
and paid a price. Or the friend who focused Jenn Granneman - Jenn is the author of the book, The Secret Lives of
so much on getting ahead in life that she Introverts: Inside Our Hidden World and the founder of IntrovertDear.
became a workaholic, compromising her com. She also blogs for Psychology Today, and her writing has been
health and relationships. These are people featured on Quiet Revolution, The Huffington Post, The Mighty, The
Muse, and elsewhere. For most of her life, she felt weird, different,
who chased rewards — hard.
and out of place because of her quiet ways; now, she writes about
introversion because she doesn’t want other introverts to feel the way
Instead of looking for outside status,
she did. Jenn lives in Minnesota; to get personal updates from her, you
introverts tend to turn inward. They research
can follow her on Facebook.
a topic simply for the sheer joy of learning

56 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


Inspiration
Your Heart:
The Gift of

HEALTH & WELLNESS


BY SUZANNE SCURLOCK-DURANA

T he heart is the wellspring of our


inspiration for life. The characteristic wisdom
culture today the voice of the heart is often
muted or ignored altogether. When our
of the heart is in how it inspires us to live more heart’s intelligence isn’t activated, we can
deeply and fully and to create from our gifts. easily feel confused, or we may listen only
The energy of love resides throughout the to the voice of the head telling us what we
entire body. It is the foundational energy upon should do. The inspiration of our deepest
which our creative inspirations are born. heart’s knowing is then lost to us.

Although the energy field of the heart has There is a distinct feeling when we drop
been proven to be quite powerful, in our into our heart and let it open up. When we

57
Priming the
share from our heart, there is an authenticity
and vulnerability that create a feeling of

Heart
connection and intimacy if the listener is
open and receptive.
Deep Well of the
There is also a distinct feeling when we
are not connected to our heart. This could
manifest as “coldheartedness,” which might
be experienced as a chill in the room or a
conversation killer, and it will create a block The heart is the home of compassion.
to genuine intimacy. When I work with someone in the helping
professions, especially healthcare providers,
Another feeling occurs when we are in our their genuine concern for others is apparent.
heart in an overly sympathetic manner. Their warmth and caring is frequently the
These kinds of interchanges often feel original inspiration that moved them toward
cloying, sometimes suffocating, and their profession.
frequently invasive.

Yet another experience occurs when our


heart resonates with another person’s heart.
A warmth in meeting, ease of connection,
feeling deeply seen and heard — these
are the empathetic connections that may
become lifelong relationships or enduring
imprints on our heart.

What is the quality of energy that our hearts


generate? The heart expresses warmth,
compassion, forgiveness, empathy, loving-
kindness, and most of all inspiration. A full-
hearted person is a happy person. However, when I sit with them long enough,
I often discover that they are much better
In Chinese medicine, the element of the heart at giving than receiving. The front of a
is fire, and there is a distinct sensation when caregiver’s heart — the part that they radiate
this element is balanced. We feel excited, love from — feels warm and wide open.
creative, and “on fire” for life. The heart is
the birthplace of our deepest inspirations, so However, often they have much less
when it has been suppressed or exhausted, awareness of the back of their heart, the
we may have a flat, muted experience. heart space of self-love and nurturing. I
Burnout approaches when our creative fire think of this as the deep well that feeds the
has gone out. rest of the heart. Like any well, when it is

58 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


not primed and replenished, it runs dry and
burnout starts to take hold. The front of the
heart — the part shared with the world —
The front of the
needs connection to the deeper well of the
heart in order to survive and thrive.
heart — the part

HEALTH & WELLNESS


This means self-care is mandatory, not shared with the
optional. The airlines truly do have it right.
You must “put your own oxygen mask on
first” before helping those in need around
world — needs
you. What the flight attendant doesn’t say
is that if you fail to care for yourself first, connection to the
unconsciousness or even death may result.
Yet many of us have been taught to ignore
our own needs as we focus on caring
deeper well of the
for those around us. This is a sure recipe
for disaster. Now is the time to turn this heart in order to
paradigm around and treat our own heart as
a primary resource that is to be treasured
and deeply valued.
survive and thrive.
Read
The heart is the home of our deepest Online!
inspiration and the well of our love for life.
Having respect for the wisdom of the heart
and living from its rich depths is essential. Suzanne Scurlock-Durana - Suzanne is the author of Reclaiming Your
Body and Full Body Presence. Her Healing from the Core curriculum
Excerpted from the book Reclaiming Your Body: combined with CranioSacral therapy and other bodywork modalities
Healing from Trauma and Awakening to Your Body’s creates a complete, body-centered guide to awareness, healing, and
Wisdom. Copyright © 2017 by Suzanne Scurlock-
Durana. Printed with permission from New World Library. joy. She teaches around the world and lives in Reston, Virginia. Visit her
www.newworldlibrary.com. online at www.healingfromthecore.com.

“The hear
t is
deepest ins the home of our
well of our piration and the
lo
respect for ve for life. Having
th
heart and l e wisdom of the
iving
depths is es from its rich
sential.”
Suzann
e Scurlo
ck-Dur
ana

59
Write from the Heart:
A Method that
Probes Your Depths BY MARCIA MARINER

W hen I was a child, I grew


up on a farm. There were no
neighbors, and I often spent hours
outside roaming the fields and
riding my bike. As soon as I was
old enough, I learned the power of
putting pen to paper. I remember
taking my pen and notebook outside
and writing love letters, poetry and
whatever else I felt like creating.

I didn’t realize it then, but I know now


that the minute I put pen to paper,
it grounded me to my Source. I
felt an immediate feeling of coming
home to myself and my breathing
would deepen as it does right now
as I write this. This experience led
me to develop a love for the sacred
tool of writing just because, just
for the fun of it. I write for no other
reason but to feel the words flowing
out of me from some invisible realm
within me.

I have always kept a journal, and,


when I was in college, I took classes
in composition and journaling. My
writing was still a haven of creativity

60 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


“The best and most away from the body, and accessing the
heart’s positive emotions helps improve
health, immunity and overall functioning.
beautiful things in the (See heartmath.org). Most importantly, this
writing tool shifts you out of a mind dominated
world cannot be seen

HEALTH & WELLNESS


functioning that is so prevalent today into a
heart centered functioning which allows you
or even or even touched, to touch deep intuitions and higher levels
of consciousness. As Helen Keller said so

They must be felt with well: “The best and most beautiful things in
the world cannot be seen or even or even
touched, They must be felt with the heart.”
the heart.”
– HELEN KELLER So let’s get started and
and connection for me during my young adult learn about the HeartFlow
years. In my mid twenties, I participated in
a five-day retreat that focused on written Writing Tool(1) in seven
exploration of deep feelings and tapping
the wisdom of my body. In this retreat, I
simple steps:
experienced more fully the power of writing
to access a deep and intimate connection to
myself and to the Divine Source within my
1. Create a safe sacred space where
you will be alone, preferably in or
own heart. near nature. Have plenty of paper and
a favorite pen available.
Current research has established the
powerful effects of writing as a healing tool.
Dr. James Pennebacker, author of “Writing
2. Place your hands on your heart
and breathe in and out deeply, for
to Heal” reports improved immunity and
several breaths. Focus on connecting
improvement in sleep, anxiety and stress.
with your heart. Seek out intentionally
Moreover, in Julia Cameron’s book “The
to feel your heart’s emotions.
Artist’s Way,” we see how writing is an
excellent means to tap the innate creativity
within us. 3. Imagine liquid warm soothing light
pouring down from the heavens and
But the writing process I am about to bathing you in a sweet honey like
describe is more than about healing, essence of warmth. Allow yourself to
reducing stress and accessing creativity. bathe in this light and receive from its
It is about accessing the power of your warmth and protection.
heart, the most powerful electromagnetic
field in the human body. As researchers at 4. Locate a positive feeling emanating
HeartMath Institute have shown, the heart’s from your heart right now and name
energy field can be measured several feet it as precisely as you can. (Examples

61
of positive heart emotions include You can come back at another time or day
feeling alive, grateful, a fullness, deeply to try to access a positive heart feeling . We
happy, loving, compassionate, joyful, can only make our intention to touch these
in communion, deep peace, a fiery feelings, but sometimes there are dry spells.
strength, boldness, awe, surrendered, Always honor yourself, wherever you are.
trusting, hopeful, etc.).
With practice, this writing method will allow
you to touch the more subtle “heavenly”
5. Describe the positive feeling sensations that are waiting for you in your
emanating from your heart as fully heart as a source of revelation. They are
as you can while staying close to the knocking on the door of your heart, but
feeling. Where do you feel it in your you need to know how to recognize them,
heart? Describe its contours. intentionally turn your gaze towards them and
learn the skill of dwelling in this heart realm.
So much more wants to be revealed to you
6. While very close to the feeling you beyond your surface thoughts and feelings.
have just named and described, let You just need to know how to tap into them.
yourself drop into the sensation even
more fully and let it take you into the If you would like to learn more about how
unknown of your heart’s depths. to become skillful in this method, please
THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT STEP! do not hesitate to contact me. I would be
It is an act of surrender and trust into the happy to share with you more resources
feeling, waiting for it to pull you further and examples of this writing method to help
into new ground. The mind cannot force you deepen your practice.
this descent. It can only let go and give
into the feeling that is alive in you. Happy HeartFlow writing!
(1) (1)The HeartFlow Writing Tool was inspired and

7. After you sense the feeling has given adapted from a method developed by a French educator,
Andre Rochais and his organization called
you all that it can today, ask yourself Personality and Human Relations Inc. See
Read
prh-international.org
if you discovered anything new Online!

about yourself in this writing. It could


be a new insight, a new connection,
a confirmation, a new invitation, etc. Marcia Mariner - Marcia is a transformational life coach and holistic
therapist who is passionate about empowering heart centered
Breathe in the new you received in this
women to awaken to their unique genius, to create a wealthy lifestyle
moment. FEEL the closer connection
from the inside out and to contribute boldly to our evolving world.
with yourself and your Source
Through Marcia’s “heart powered” gatherings, classes, individual
As you begin this HeartFlow writing method, and group coaching, she has created a growing community of
it is possible that you are unable to access a visionary women who support one another’s ongoing emergence,
positive feeling emanating from your heart at as each takes steps to become their authentic selves, to deepen
this time. Be gentle with yourself and trust their self-love practices and to prepare themselves for their leap
your process. Try exploring the more difficult into their next level of greatness. Visit marciamariner.com and
sensation using the same HeartFlow method. receive “Meditation for a Calm Heart.

62 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS
Enlightened Parenting:
CREATE COMMUNITY BY MERYL DAVIDS LANDAU

M y kids and I were doing puzzles together on the patio floor when it dawned on me:
I was lonely. They were joyous companions, but I needed more (and likely so did they). My
closest friend had moved far away, and like most of us in the suburbs, I barely knew my
neighbors. Our family life was filled with play, work, chores, activities, and love, but we were
missing a sense of belonging to a larger whole.

64 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


Communities are especially important sources of nourishment
for kids, who thrive in knowing that everyone around them
cares about them, not just their mom and dad.

FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS


Generations ago, no one needed to think have learned that, with a little effort, anyone
about community. Friends and extended can create meaningful community. Building
families lived in the same neighborhood such a tribe for your family involves more
for decades, so everyone knew everyone. than surrounding yourself with a lot of
Although I’d never experienced this—and people; you can be in a bustling city or a
I imagine there was some claustrophobia busy park and still feel alone. And it means
involved, and at least an occasional wish going beyond the groups that most adults
that people weren’t privy to all of your rely on for communal sustenance before we
business—there’s also something profound had kids (gym or yoga class buddies, 12-
in knowing that your family has a place where step meeting attendees, office pals), which
it belongs. That there are people outside may nurture us as individuals but don’t do
your immediate clan who cheer you during the same for our families.
your triumphs and cherish you when times
are tough. And who might treasure your
child in a way that today is largely confined Here are ways I’ve made
to his doting parents and grandparents.

community happen for my family
Communities are especially important over the years, and that could be
sources of nourishment for kids, who thrive
in knowing that everyone around them cares valuable for yours:
about them, not just their mom and dad.
When I was a child, my family used to go to a T AKE THE LEAD WITH YOUR
bungalow colony in upstate New York every
summer. The same families came back year NEIGHBORS.
after year, so we got to be close. It was such a When I moved into my home a decade
thrill when another kid’s parent remembered ago, the first thing I did was design
what I liked to eat for lunch or what group a flyer inviting families in two dozen
games I enjoyed playing. And when I fell off a nearby homes to come to our house on
monkey bar and broke my arm one wretched a Sunday afternoon for pizza and cake.
July day, I went to bed feeling awful but woke Over the years, this group has continued
the next morning to a towering pile of gifts— to socialize at potlucks, pool parties,
compliments of all the families in the colony moms’ nights out, and sunset gatherings
who’d joined together to boost my mood. on someone’s driveway or yard. At some
The kinship that naturally forms after years point during each get-together, I call the
of living in the same place, working the kids from their impromptu games and
same job, or attending the same religious the adults from the food and drink tables
organization is gone for many of us. But I and encourage everyone to participate in

65
a round of out-loud sharing. This is how L OOK INTO COHOUSING.
we learned that a neighbor got a long-
desired job promotion, that another had Cohousing is a unique housing concept
been fired, that kids won their sports that combines private and communal
leagues (and where their games were living. A typical community has families
so others could attend) or were having owning their homes, either apartment-
trouble with their homework (more than style or tightly spaced houses or
one adult has volunteered to tutor), and, townhouses, while sharing a “common
sadly, that someone had been diagnosed houseResidents hold group dinners,
with aggressive breast cancer (prompting movie nights, football-game watching,
a call to arms among the neighbors to and other events in the common house,
drive her son to school or summer camp, and they play group games and sports
among other assistance). There’s nothing in the shared yard. Unfortunately, with
like knowing the people within walking only a few dozen cohousing communities
distance who can take in a package and currently built in this country (Denmark
lend you eggs, or pick up and feed your has hundreds), your chances of finding
kid in a pinch. And who make everyone one near you are small, although the
in your family feel like they are home as number is growing. My family participated
soon as they enter the neighborhood. in a group trying to get one developed in
(When my car was in the shop, one South Florida, but we ran into problems—
neighbor even lent me hers for the week the housing crash of 2008 didn’t help—
to shuttle my kids!) and it never happened. (It was through
this effort that I learned the value of
G
 ATHER REGULARLY WITH reaching out to my neighbors no matter
LIKE-MINDED NEW FRIENDS. where I lived.) Find a list of built or forming
communities in each state at the website
Make a list of other young families you Cohousing.org.
particularly like or with whom you share
common interests and invite them over. Excerpt from Enlightened Parenting: A Mom
Read
I did this years ago with families from my Reflects on Living Spiritually With Kids by
Online!
Meryl Davids Landau
alternative Jewish congregation, and it
was from this group that a lively spiritual
parenting discussion group evolved.
(The adults talked while the kids played Meryl Davids Landau - Meryl Davids Landau is the author of the
book Enlightened Parenting: A Mom Reflects on Living Spiritually
in the other room.) Worried you don’t
With Kids, named a finalist in the Indie Excellence Awards. She also
have enough space in your home? Take
wrote the spiritual women’s novel Downward Dog, Upward Fog, a
it outside, as I did with a different group
fiction book of the year finalist in the Foreword Reviews Awards. Her
of families that assembled for “family work has appeared in numerous publications, including Parents,
soccer” at a local park. Or as I also did O: The Oprah Magazine, Glamour, Self, Redbook, Reader’s Digest,
when my kids were older and several Prevention, Huffington Post, Vice and more. Meryl is a certified yoga
families met every full moon for a sunset teacher and Reiki practitioner, and is the mom to two kids, now
potluck at the beach. young adults. Learn more at www.MerylDavidsLandau.com.

66 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


67
TRANSFORMING
Your Relationship

TRANSFORM YOUR RELATIONSHIP:


How to Forgive and
Start Anew in Your
RELATIONSHIP BY STACEY MARTINO

I f you’ve been following along in this


6-part Transforming Your Relationship
blog series covering our 8-Step
Relationship Transformation System, at
this point, you’ve created a vision for your
relationship, you’ve had a perspective
shift so you actually SEE the dynamics
in your relationship differently than you
have before, you’ve used tools and
strategies that work to shift yourself
and create a change with your partner,
you learned how to become a team and
create a rock-solid relationship –where
nothing and nobody and come between
you, and today I’m going to share Step
5, which is “Start Anew”.

68 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


Starting Anew is about wiping the slate clean,
releasing all hurts, betrayals, pain, and things
not yet forgiven. By definition, when there
are things that have come between you, it
creates separateness and distance. You can’t
1
The First Obstacle
to Forgiveness

FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS


get to a place of intimacy and unshakable What IS forgiveness?
love if there are things driving you apart and
un-forgiveness is one of the biggest things I Years ago I was listening to Oprah talk about
see destroying relationships today! forgiveness and she shared a definition
that blew me away!! It totally changed my
That’s why Step 5 is Start Anew. perspective on forgiveness and empowered
me in a whole new way! Today, I’m going to
Over the years Paul and I have developed pay that gift forward by sharing it with you.
a 5-Step Forgiveness Process™, which has The true definition of forgiveness is:
helped thousands of students find freedom
from the past! I hope one day, you will give
yourself the gift of experiencing our entire 5 “FORGIVENESS IS GIVING UP THE
step process! HOPE THAT THE PAST COULD
Today, I’m going to share three key pieces with
HAVE BEEN ANY DIFFERENT THAN
you so you can begin to release any past hurts IT ACTUALLY WAS.”
or betrayals, start anew in your relationship, – OPRAH WINFREY
and create your unshakable love!

Whether you need to forgive yourself, your Too many people suffer because they
partner, an ex, or anyone else in your life, this believe that forgiveness means saying what
process works! It’s time to wipe the slate clean the other person did to them is fine; as if
and start anew. You deserve this freedom! they’re saying, “Oh, yeah…that thing that
you did? It’s ok.”
It’s time to understand That’s NOT what forgiveness is!
what forgiveness really is.
Forgiveness is simply giving up the HOPE
that the past could have been any different
Whenever I tell my students that anything than it was.
can be forgiven, many are skeptical and
some are downright unwilling, “Stacey, I Many people obsess over thoughts like,
can’t let that go - you have no idea what they “They could have…. They should have…
did to me!” If only they did _____, …then they wouldn’t
have hurt me and I wouldn’t still be suffering!”
And I get it - some people have been through
really horrific, traumatic experiences. Please The problem is, we cannot go back and
understand I’m not making light of that at all!! change the past.

Very often, this resistance to forgive comes from None of us can. We are powerless to change
a misunderstanding of what forgiveness really is. what has already happened. It’s over and done.

69
We have no CHOICE to go back and re-do Forgiveness doesn’t happen BETWEEN
what happened. two people. Forgiveness only happens
within you!
However, we do have a CHOICE to release
our insistence that the past SHOULD have The moment you decide to give up the
been different. We can instead ACCEPT that HOPE that the past could have been any
the past could not have been any different different than it actually was, you are FREE!
than it actually was.
Many people get stuck by the FALSE belief
YOUR TWO CHOICES: that to forgive, you need to go to the other
person and express “I forgive you”.
1  Hold onto your insistence/hope that the You can do that, but that is not forgiveness,
past should have been different and that is AMENDS.
stay STUCK in that forever.
Amends happens between two people.
2  Accept that the past could not be any Forgiveness only happens within YOU.
different than it actually was and begin
to get unstuck. All you must do to experience forgiveness
and be free is to give up the hope that the
The power of FORGIVENESS is an past could have been any different than it

2 3
amazing thing! actually was. Breathe. And be free.

The Second Obstacle to The Third Obstacle


Forgiveness to Forgiveness
So, by now, if you are willing to give up
the hope that the past could have been
any different than it actually was, and you
recognize that forgiveness only happens
within yourself, you may be considering
embracing forgiveness in this moment…
BUT, where would be the JUSTICE in that?!

Which brings us to obstacle number


three. The false belief that holding onto
UNforgiveness creates JUSTICE.

Often times, once someone accepts the Unforgiveness doesn’t create justice… ever.
fact that the past could not have been
different, the next obstacle to overcome is That’s just not how justice works. The Universe
the second misunderstanding about how delivers justice through the law of cause and
forgiveness happens. effect, the most powerful law of the Universe.

70 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


No one escapes the law of cause and effect But for a lot of things in life, these two KEY
NO ONE. pieces ARE enough for you to forgive, get
unstuck and be free!
It may appear to you, at times, like someone
“got away with it.” But they did not get away For the situations in your life that you need

FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS


with anything. The “boomerang effect” of deeper Forgiveness work around, I hope
every negative action is an equal negative you will give yourself the gift of experiencing
re-action. our full 5 Step Forgiveness Process, in one
of our live events or online programs!
You may not SEE this negative ramification
present in their life. That does not mean they In my next column, we will move into the
are not suffering. Very often, the damage is Passion Steps of our 8 Step Relationship
happening behind closed doors. Pain you Transformation System, as we talk
will never see. But it is there, I assure you. about the spark between Masculine and
Feminine energy!
Not caused by you. Caused by THEM.
Through their own action, they have brought
pain and suffering onto themselves, through Read
Online!
the power of cause and effect.

It happens without you. Stacey Martino - Stacey believes that it


only takes ONE partner to transform a
You do not get to participate in someone relationship…ANY relationship! She is
else’s JUSTICE. That is between the passionate about helping people create
Universe and them. their unshakable love
and unleashed passion!
Holding onto UNforgiveness does not enact
justice on anyone. Stacey, and her husband Paul, are the founders
of RelationshipDevelopment.org and creators
Unforgiveness only stays within you. Causing of RelationshipU®. Relationship Development® is personal
pain and suffering for you, and you alone. development for your relationship. Today, through their strategic
coaching, online programs and packed live events, Stacey and
At any time, you may choose forgiveness, Paul have helped tens of thousands of people around the world to
release this suffering, allow the Universe to transform their love relationship! And as a happy bonus, you get to
enact justice in ways you may never see, apply the same strategies to improve all your relationships.
and be free!
Trained and certified by Tony Robbins, Stacey is a certified marriage
educator and divorce preventionist. As an international best-selling
Now, I’m not saying that those three pieces
author, Stacey is a sought-after relationship expert, passionate and
are enough to forgive anything you are
engaging speaker and media guest and is the Relationship Expert
navigating. After all, we have a 5 Step
for Aspire Magazine. Download Stacey’s free book “It Does Not Take
Forgiveness Process for a reason. There is
Two to Tango: How One Partner Can Transform Any Relationship in
more work to be done. 8 Simple Steps at www.RelationshipDevelopment.org.

71
Are You
Abandoning
Yourself? BY DR. MARGARET PAUL

W hen we think about abandonment, we


generally think about being left by someone.
But abandonment is about leaving someone
another area. For example, you might work
hard to make a good living and have learned
how to manage your money, which means
we are responsible for – a child or an old or sick that you are taking financial responsibility. But
person who cannot take care of themselves you might be abandoning yourself physically
and whom we have agreed to take care of. by eating poorly, not getting exercise and not
getting enough sleep. When this is the case,
As a healthy adult, another adult can leave you are physically abandoning yourself. Or
you, but they cannot abandon you, since they perhaps you take organizational responsibility
likely have not agreed to be responsible for you. by being on time and keeping your environment
neat and clean, but you abandon yourself
It might seem strange to you, but, as a healthy relationally by giving yourself up and/or not
adult, when you feel abandoned by someone, speaking up for yourself.
it is not actually about them. It is about having
abandoned yourself. One of the most common ways that
many people abandon themselves is
Most people don’t think about how they emotionally. Most people don’t realize that
abandon themselves because they don’t they are responsible for learning to lovingly
recognize that they are responsible for manage their feelings. Few of us had good
themselves – physically, emotionally, spiritually, role models for managing our painful feelings
financially, relationally and organizationally. in ways that support our highest good.
Instead, we learned many dysfunctional
Sometimes we abandon ourselves in one ways of avoiding our feelings.
area and take responsibility for ourselves in

72 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


Emotional Self-Abandonment Feelings—Your inner Guidance System
I’ve discovered four ways that many people The problem with emotionally abandoning
emotionally abandon themselves: yourself in any of these ways is that you
are bypassing your entire inner guidance

FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS


system. For example, do you know how
1 Self-judgment you feel when you abandon yourself? Most
people feel anxious, depressed, empty,
How often are you aware of judging yourself? alone, guilty, shamed and/or angry when they
Do you tell yourself that you are not good abandon themselves, but they rarely connect
enough, that you are a failure, that you are these feelings with their self-abandonment.
stupid, or ugly or bad? I don’t think I’ve ever Instead, they believe they feel this way due to
counseled a person who didn’t judge their self something external.
in some ways.
If you start to tune into how you feel when
you judge yourself, or when you are in your
2 Staying in your head rather than head thinking rather than being present in
your body, or you are acting out addictively
being present in your body or making others responsible for you, you will
discover how awful you are making yourself
Do you spend most of your awake time feel. You will discover that your feelings of
thinking, being unaware of your feelings? Is anxiety, depression, emptiness, aloneness,
thinking a way you’ve learned to avoid feeling guilt, shame, abandonment or anger are
your feelings? letting you know that you are abandoning
yourself.
3 Turning to various addictions Do you want to know this? If you do, make a
decision to start learning from your feelings,
Have you learned to turn to various addictions rather than avoiding them. You will discover
to avoid feeling your feelings? Do you indulge that when you learn to take emotional
in substances, activities or various forms of responsibility, it becomes far easier to take
controlling behavior to avoid your feelings? personal responsibility in all other areas of
your life. You will discover that when you start
4 Making another or others re- to learn from your feelings, rather
than continue to avoid them, your Read
sponsible for your feelings entire life will change for the better. Online!

Do you look to others for the attention and


Dr. Margaret Paul - Dr. Margaret Paul is a bestselling author,
approval that you are not giving to yourself?
relationship expert, popular Huffington Post writer and co-creator of
Do you then try to control them with anger,
the powerful Inner Bonding® self-healing process, recommended by
judgment, compliance, withdrawal or
actress Lindsay Wagner and singer Alanis Morissette. She has appeared
resistance, in order to get them to give you
on numerous radio and television shows, including Oprah, and has
want you want?
successfully worked with thousands and taught classes and seminars for
over 47 years. Visit www.InnerBonding.com and download Margaret’s
Inner Bonding Home Study Course and learn to love yourself.

73
3 Questions to Help You
REDEFINE YOUR DIVORCE
BY MAL DUANE

I have spent the past month doing


research and interviewing women, collecting
Most of them had experienced a heart-
breaking betrayal or abusive treatment.
Each one started to cry when they recounted
data for an online course I am producing. I
am so grateful to all the women that shared the circumstances of their divorce. Even
the circumstances of their divorces. I was so though it may have been years, their pain
touched by their stories. I know their pain and surfaced quickly. Each one of them was
the overwhelming feeling of being devastated. so honest about their fear of living their life

74 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


alone, some for the very first time. Several 1. LIST THE TWO MOST POSITIVE THINGS
expressed it felt like being kicked to the TO COME OUT OF YOUR MARRIAGE?
curb, just being disposed of. Here are some of the replies.
• Kids
Some are still struggling with trying to

FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS


• Good organizational skills
forgive their cheating husbands. There was
• Courage to leave
still a lot of anger towards their husband for
• Advocated for herself and her
breaking the family apart. Out of the second
children.
more specific criteria group I interviewed,
only one had established a new relationship.
2. WHAT ARE YOU PROUD OF THAT HAVE
Not only were they broken-hearted, but they
YOU ACCOMPLISHED SINCE YOUR
were still reluctant to start dating. They
DIVORCE?
didn’t want to leave themselves open for
any more disappointment. Underneath it all • Recognized a need for more
there were definite trust issues remaining.
education
This confirms how slow the recovery • Started working with a coach
process is for women who truly loved • Created a financial budget and
their husbands. Even if they asked for the started real fiscal responsibility
divorce, it did not diminish the loss they felt • Stepped into a new career with
afterwards. Not to mention the drastic life higher pay
style changes that occurred.
3. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE
Allow yourself to feel the loss you have POTENTIAL OF YOUR FUTURE?
experienced. Many women describe it like • Optimistic
it is a death. In fact, it is. It is the death of • Hoping to find a new partner
your expectations on how you were going • Wanted to get better jobs/careers
to live your life. Your life has been turned • Realize they did all they could in
upside down. The women I spoke to still their marriage- releasing the guilt
felt discomfort but when I encouraged them and feeling of being a failure.
to speak about it they were not afraid to • Going to start doing more things for
express it. themselves.

I proposed an experiment of redefining


the divorce experience and to uncover What all of this proved to me is that these
the courage they had to go through it. To women are very resilient. If they are given
tap into their survivor mode rather than the right tools, education and support, they
being the victim. I gave them three mindful are willing to start over.
questions which would extract positive
responses from an otherwise devastating LET’S TALK ABOUT THOSE
situation. I could hear in their voices
that their answers started to shift them TOOLS AND WHICH ARE THE
energetically almost immediately. MOST IMPORTANT ONES...

75
The primary concern following a divorce will impact all areas of your life in the most
is financial. You are now in charge of the magnificent ways. You not able to start a
money. It is so important to know where you new relationship if you don’t feel really good
spend money and what you don’t need to about yourself.
spend it on. Becoming fiscally responsible
early on will give you a strong foundation to Getting back up from the devastation of
start building a new life. You need checking divorce takes resilience. It takes courage.
and a savings account. Try to limit yourself Women are so much more powerful than
to one credit card to use so you can build a they have ever been taught. Once you tap
good credit score which is most important. into an inkling of that survival mode, the
adrenalin starts flowing. It acts as the first
Housing may become an issue. You will wave to carry you through rough seas. Yes,
absolutely need a good credit score to obtain you will get bounced around. You might
a rental home or to get a mortgage so you even swallow a little bit of the sea water but
can buy a new home. They also look at debt all the while remaining afloat. As new winds
ratios. If your total debt is higher than 36% of fill your sails, you begin to realize you are
your income, you may not qualify for housing. the courageous captain of your own ship.

Building a new career is easier today than


it used to be. You have unlimited access to
online training in almost any field you are
BLESSINGS TO YOU
passionate about. Education has never
been more affordable. Maybe you just need ON YOUR NEW
a little brushing up on computer skills? There
is endless free training on YouTube or you
could get specific classes on Lynda.com for
VOYAGE!
a very reasonable fee.

The man thing is the least important. Once


you have your life stabilized and you are Read
becoming financially independent, your Online!
attraction factor will be much stronger. The
old days of finding a man with money to take
care of you are history. Men want women Mal Duane - Mal Duane has triumphed over devastating life challenges
and uses the lessons she has learned to coach other women and
who have their act together.
help them to reclaim their self-worth. She is a Certified Spiritual,
Professional and Life Coach. She has been recognized as a leading
The more independent you are, the hotter
expert on self-worth. Mal is the author of the No. 1 Bestseller, Alpha
you are! Chick: Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power and a contributing author
to multiple other bestselling books with Inspired Living Publishing.
Financial stability will help you create She has been featured on Fox News, Huffington Post, Maria Shriver’s
stronger beliefs and perceptions about website, Middlesex News, Aspire Magazine and Healthy Living Magazine.
your ability to take care of yourself. It will Visit www.MalDuaneCoach.com today and claim your powerful free
enhance your self-worth dramatically which 6-part video series, Heal Your Wounded Heart & Reclaim Your Worth.

76 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


BUSINESS, SUCCESS & MINDSET
LIVING the
Goddess Laptop
LIFESTYLE

MAGICAL LIVING
Misconceptions
DISPELLED BY LISA MARIE ROSATI

T here are a whole lot of misconceptions floating around out there in the world about
“magical living.” There are many who believe that all magical people are witches and evil –
stirring a big black cauldron while working the dark arts.

*queue flying monkeys*

And there are those who believe that magical living and religion are mutually exclusive - you can
be either religious or magical.

I strongly disagree with both points.

78 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


The consciousness of do?” My answer still makes me tear up… I
answered, “To help shift the global paradigm

the planet has shifted, around religion and magick.”

Holy Shit. It still feels TOO BIG for little old


and I see women

BUSINESS, SUCCESS & MINDSET


me…

in my circles and Alas, it is my truth and I believe there is no


time better than NOW to whip out my bullhorn
community beginning and step on my soapbox. The consciousness
of the planet has shifted, and I see women
to wiggle their toes in my circles and community beginning to
wiggle their toes outside the broom closet.
outside the broom So my lovely, I feel strongly that the time is
RIGHT NOW for us to discuss what magical
closet. living is not.

Magical LIVING
THE 2 MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT
The Goddess Lifestyle Plan® has grown
and evolved over the years, however it’s
core teachings have never changed, at it’s
essence, my work has always been about
teaching women about {Practical} Magical
Living and empowering them to tap into
their Personal Power via self mastery and MISCONCEPTION #1
living in alignment with Universal Law.
Magical living and Religion are Mutually
For as long as I can remember I’ve been Exclusive - you can either be Religious or
fearful to speak loudly about Magical Living. Magical.
The reason might be that I’m not a feather
ruffler by nature, or it might be I hold cellular
SO not true. I don’t feel there’s one word
memory of The Burning Times, or perhaps
that can sum up who Lisa Marie Rosati is,
it’s fear of Internet lynching mobs (aka trolls)
that feel the need to publically shame and so I don’t call myself a Witch, although I do
persecute those who think more expansively route the Witch Archetype often. I route a
or differently than them. Regardless the variety of different archetypes given my mood
reason, I’m done whispering to those I feel or situation; Teacher, Wounded Healer, and
most safe with about WHO I AM. Priestess to name a few, and so do you…
in Jungian psychology, Archetypes are a
I remember completing a written exercise collectively inherited unconscious idea, pattern
while at a business training a few years ago of thought, image, etc., universally present in
where the question was, “What do you think individual psyches. A simple definition, it’s the
youre life purpose is? What are you here to way your route power on the physical plane.

79
I’ve never called myself a “Catholic”, even I invite you to look at the world through
though I was born into the Catholic faith… magical lenses, not to be confused with
I love Jesus and his teachings and I light rose-colored glasses. Magical Lenses allow
candles to the Virgin Mary on my altar you to see the magic through the mundane,
every day. I don’t consider myself “religious” they symbolism in every moment, and the
as much as I consider myself reverent. I courage to take personal responsibility for
happen to appreciate certain aspects of all your day-to-day life experiences.
belief systems, so if I need to label myself,
I’d say I’m a Spiritual Eclectic. YOU are more powerful than you realize
and braver than you think.
Is there such a thing as a Christian Witch? I
haven’t decided, but I’m thinking deeply into I thank you for the honor of holding the
that question lately. lantern for you as your walk your magical
path in whatever capacity that
feels good to you… Read
MISCONCEPTION #2 Online!

Spells and Ritual are EVIL.


Passionista Lisa Marie Rosati – Intuitive
Business & Success Mentor and Lifestyle
You (and everyone else on the planet) are
Expert Lisa Marie Rosati is the Creatrix
casting spells and participating in ritual
of The Goddess Lifestyle Plan®,
whether you realize it or not.
expert columnist for Aspire Magazine,
Every thought you have is prayer and international best-selling author, and
every word you speak is a spell. Words High Priestess of The Goddess Lifestyle Sisterhood™. Believing
have power; they create your beliefs and that women CAN have it all, Lisa has successfully created a
your beliefs dictate how you maneuver in thriving, global brand while being a devoted wife and raising
the world. her children. It’s Lisa’s passion to teach ambitious, soulful
women how to create an abundant,
Ritual is simply something you do often in purpose-filled life, and prosperous laptop
the same way. You probably have a morning business they love!
ritual, a bedtime ritual, a good luck ritual
(think throwing salt over your shoulder), Lisa’s unique combination of strategic thinking, laser sharp
etc. There are informal rituals like firing up intuition, vast knowledge of holistic health, psychology,
a smudge stick and waving it about to break human behavior, healing modalities and women’s spirituality
up the negative energy in a space, and plus 20+ years of metaphysical study and practice, results in
formal rituals where you call in the Elements an effective mix of spirituality and “real world,” no-nonsense
and Spirit and work magick. practicality that supports her private clients and community
in embracing their own Inner Goddess. Lisa exemplifies the
I hope this article sparked curiosity with in Goddess Lifestyle as she embraces her powerful feminine
you… AND I’d be tickled pink purple if my nature with pride and encourages other women to do the same.
words brought up a “HELL YEAH” response Visit www.GoddessLifestylePlan.com today and claim your free
from deep inside of you! “New Moon Manifestation Record”.

80 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


81
6 WAYS TO GENERATE

Compelling
CLIENT-CENTRIC
BLOG POSTS
BY DEBORAH KEVIN

82 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


A s a heart-centered, service-minded
entrepreneur, you want to authentically
A GREAT TOOL FOR
connect with your ideal clients. In many POLLING YOUR

BUSINESS, SUCCESS & MINDSET


circles, this is known as “marketing.” Before
you shudder and turn away, know you can READERS IS TO
market in a way that feels great to both your POST OPEN-ENDED
potential customer and you. One tool to
create connection and value is publishing a QUESTIONS ON
blog.
YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA
I could spout off many statistics about ACCOUNTS, AND PAY
why you ought to blog, but I won’t. Why?
Because I want to encourage you to dig deep ATTENTION TO THE
and examine your “WHY” and determine RESPONSES.
how you can share incredible resources and
information with your ideal clients because
that’s just how you roll. At the end of the day, to your clients, you can effectively answer
blogging demonstrates your authority and their most burning questions.
builds rapport with potential clients while
keeping the current ones engaged. Your A great tool for polling your readers is to
influence does matter! post open-ended questions on your social
media accounts, and pay attention to the
But what do you write about? Most responses. Are there trends? What interests
entrepreneurs struggle to keep the blog your clients? Here’s a ninja trick: you
post ideas flowing (yes, even me). So here needn’t ask questions solely related to your
are six ways you can generate ideas for business. Asking your followers who they
compelling posts: had their first crush on can lead to a deeper
understanding of demographics and it just
might spark an interesting twist on a topic
LISTEN TO YOUR near to your heart.
1. AUDIENCE
WHAT’S HOT –
What questions do your clients ask you the
most? Jot these down and use them as
2. SOCIAL MEDIA
seeds from which you can grow great posts.
Chances are pretty good that you could What’s the latest buzz online and how
easily make a list of at least four common can you draw a parallel to your business?
questions without much thought. Boom! Scour what’s hot and capitalize. (I once
Just like that you have a month’s worth of wrote a blog on how listening to Ed Sheeran
blog posts. And your customers told you could improve your writing.) Keep your ears
exactly what they needed. Just by listening and eyes open, as inspiration can appear

83
anywhere, often in the strangest of places.
(I don’t know about you, but my best ideas
seem to come when I’m in the shower — so
always keep a notebook handy, even if it’s on
the bathroom counter.) It’s best to keep your
posts non-political and non-controversial,
unless you can give a professional, factual
analysis (or you’re a political analyst).

I follow people I admire on social media.


When something strikes a nerve for me,
I note what it was about their post that
struck me. Sometimes these brain tickles used sparingly lest you start to sound like
are just the thing to spark new ideas worth an infomercial). Here’s how I position new
developing. offerings: I post news on my blog first and
then create a call-to-action to share at the
bottom of following posts.
3. SHARE A STORY
If your company is growing, share post
Sharing a personal story is the perfect type highlighting your new staff member —
of post to build that “know-like-trust” factor. this goes far in building teamwork as
A blog is just the place to be vulnerable well as giving the impression of increase.
while building your brand. Open up and let Pulling back the curtain on your business
readers into your world with a short tale or makes an interesting “writes-itself” post.
wacky thing that happened recently. Even What’s working for you? What apps have
a quick but intriguing conversation you had you discovered? What would you do
while waiting in line at the coffee shop can differently?
be the start of a post. It’s relatable and real,
thus invaluable. Are you speaking anywhere or being
interviewed on a podcast? This type of
People love to know who you are and what information can be parsed in several ways.
makes you tick. We all want to deal with You could post about the facts (e.g., dates,
people who understand us. For additional times, channels) or you could share a story
information on storytelling, here’s a post I about the experience and what you learned.
recently shared.

5. SCOUT OTHERS
4. WHAT’S NEW?
As an entrepreneur, it’s a good idea to follow
If you’ve created new products, programs, other bloggers. Often what you read or watch
or offerings, sharing the news on your blog can inspire you to create your own spin on
is an excellent marketing technique (a word a concept or thought. It’s a great way to get
of warning: this type of post ought to be those creative juices flowing.

84 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


In fact, it’s a great practice to follow a variety
BRAINSTORM BY
of blogs. There are four types of blogs I
recommend each entrepreneur follow:
6. LETTING GO
a. Brother blogs – These are written Julia Cameron in her book, The Artists’

BUSINESS, SUCCESS & MINDSET


by like-minded folks who share a Way, suggests refilling your creative well by,
similar focus, audience size, and well, being creative. I suggest making this
demographics as your business. part of your daily (or at a minimum, weekly)
routine to keep inspiration flowing. After all,
b. Aunt blogs – These blogs live in your an empty pitcher fills no cups. Go for a walk,
niche but have the size of audience meditate, do some yoga, workout at the
you’d like to grow to. gym, paint or color, or sit on the beach and
c. Cousin blogs – Reading blogs from let the universe speak to you. Bet you come
a separate but globally-related genre. back with a few great ideas – and maybe
Often these spark new ideas you can even a little tan.
use in unique ways.
d. Learning blogs – No matter their field, These six ways are effective in keeping
small business owners can draw insight your ideas flowing, generating meaningful
into their own practices from experts blog posts, and publishing on a consistent
on topics such as bookkeeping, human basis. By doing so, you’ll more quickly
resources, or marketing. build the “know-like-trust” factor with your
ideal clients and increase your
You can read a more in-depth description of expertise status. Who knows, Read
these kinds of blogs here. you might even have some fun Online!
along the way!

Deborah Kevin - Deborah Kevin (pronounced “key-vin”) loves


helping heart-centered entrepreneurs attract their ideal clients
and grow their businesses by creating and implementing a
compelling blog strategy. She’s a member of the Association
of Writing Professionals. Her passions include travel, cooking,
hiking, and kayaking. She lives with her family in Maryland.
Visit www.DeborahKevin.com to learn more and to download
your free eGuide, 5 Steps to Publishing Client-Attracting Posts.
“Sharing a
story is the personal
pe
of post to b rfect type
uild that
‘know-like-
trust’ facto
r.”
Debora
h Kevin

85
HOLISTIC BUSINESS
SuccessSecrets

5Take the LeapSTEPS TO

&FLY! BY SHELLEY RIUTTA, MSE, LPC

W hat would you do if you were


not afraid? What risks would you take
in your life? What would it look like to
take a leap in your life? Many of us spend
most of our time creating what we think of
as safety and security in our life—having a
job that pays well, having a home, saving
for the future, keeping our relationships
the same etc. Essentially establishing and
maintaining the status quo.

Now there is nothing wrong with this


except that many people tend to error on
the side of not knowing when it is time to
make a change—when it is time to take
a leap. You see we are expansive Spirits
who are here to grow, learn and express our

86 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


“There is no passion to be found playing small
in settling for a life that is less than the one you

BUSINESS, SUCCESS & MINDSET


are capable of living.”
–Nelson Mandela

full potential. These signals that our Spirit about in other people’s issues—it is a
wants to grow are very subtle and can be signal you need to take leap in your
easily covered over by the voice of what own life.
we “should” be doing in our life. When this
happens it can lead to problems in our lives.

HERE ARE SOME SIGNALS


4 Y
 ou feel depressed. There is passion
and dreams within you that long to be
felt and expressed. If you put a lid on
these—you hold this energy back and
THAT YOU MAY NEED TO you will feel depressed.

TAKE A LEAP IN YOUR LIFE:


5 You are jealous ofother people and what
they are doing in their own lives. This is

1 T he
biggest Signal is that you feel stuck
and stagnant. Because we are meant
to grow and expand when we stop
another signal that you have untapped
dreams inside of you. Treat your
jealousy as a gift, a signal that you
this expansion we will feel the energy have so much more inside of you that
inside of us start to get “stuck.” wants to be expressed— much more
than you ever could imagine!

2 You tend to worry a lot. There is a lot


of creative energy that wants to move
within you and create—if you stop this 6 You have low energy. When you are not
growing and expanding your energy
energy from creating it has nowhere to starts to get dull and stagnate—which
go but into another activity like worry. makes it even harder to start to make
So stop worrying and start creating! changes. The key is to move out of
your inertia to begin to make the

3 Y
 ou are over focused on other people and
their problems. Because you don’t have
a compelling leap you are making in
changes that your Spirit is calling to
make—and to keep moving forward.

your life you have no focal point for


your energy—so you can get easily
distracted by other people’s problems.
7 Y
 ou are easily irritated and frustrated.
Your Spirit can get a little cranky if you
are not heeding its call for you to move
If you find yourself repeatedly caught forward in your life. You can blame

87
it on your job, your mate, your kids,
your relatives—but it all comes down Lesson Two: Know that you will be
to the core issue—you must listen to uncomfortable as you take your Leaps
your Spirit and begin to express this and learn to Fly. Use this statement
beautiful energy or you will be very to help yourself “I am willing to be
frustrated. uncomfortable to make the changes
I need to make.” The more you

8 You feel hopeless.


 Your Spirit may be
signaling that you need to Leap—but
your conditioned self—your fears–
acknowledge that uncomfortableness
is just part of the process—not a signal
that you need to stop—you will be able
to continue to move forward. The more
block you from taking any action. Just
like a little kid who wants something you do this the more comfortable you
so badly and the parents are ignoring will get with the uncomfortableness.
these desires— and not doing anything
about them—the child begins to feel
hopeless. The same dynamic operates Lesson Three: Keep Your Eye on the
inside of you. Not listening to the voice Prize. As you take your Leap there will
be things that may appear that seem
of your Spirit over and over can lead to
like obstacles in your path. Your job is
the same kind of hopeless resignation.
to keep focused on where you are going
Instead listen to your Spirit and take
and NOT to get sidetracked into over
action on these desires and you will feel
focusing on these obstacles. When I
your hope and excitement for the future
work with clients and this happens—the
begin to soar. more they stay on track with their vision
of where they are going—the more easily
LEARNING TO FLY—FLYING these apparent obstacles just fall away.

LESSONS
Lesson Four: As You Leap You Will begin
to Adjust to a Higher, Lighter Vibration
and your Body will shed dense energy
Lesson One: If you are confused what
so you Can Move Higher. This can
your Leap would be ask yourself “What is
manifest in getting physically sick for
one thing that my Spirit has been quietly a brief time as your body adjusts and
telling me to do for years—that I have releases the dense energy you have
been ignoring?” It could be something been carrying. After you get better you
small—like “My Spirit has been telling will feel better than you did before you
me to exercise regularly for years”. Take got sick—you will have upleveled. You
action on this information because there can also release this denser energy
is a wisdom in your Spirit—it knows through feeling emotions of sadness,
what step needs to happen first—and fear and anxiety. Again these emotions
this step will lead to the next—and then will quickly move through and you will
to the next. Before you know it these feel lighter and more free after they
smaller steps will build a momentum that pass through. Remember the lighter
will lead you to even bigger leaps. you are—the easier it is to fly!

88 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2017


So listen to the subtle—or not so subtle
Lesson Five: You will feel VERY signals that you are meant to take a leap in
supported as you take action and your life. Listen and leap—trusting that as
Leap. Once you make the decision you jump you will feel a sweet support and
and leap you will feel amazing levels of a cheering surrounding you –lifting you to fly

BUSINESS, SUCCESS & MINDSET


support come to you from the Universe. even higher into the magnificent life that is
Clients of mine who had been sitting on meant especially for you!
the sidelines for years contemplating
their leap are blown away with how
supported they feel when they finally
take action. They say to me “If I knew
it was going to feel this wonderful I
would have made this change years
ago!” You will feel support from other
people, circumstances will come
together to support you in miraculous
ways, doors will fly open, signals come
that let you know you are on track. You
will meet people who are your “flying
partners”—people on your path that
are uniquely supporting you by giving
you enthusiastic encouragement and
also practical support and information.

Lesson Six: As you Leap and Begin to


Fly you will Feel a Special Joy. You are
Read
meant to be flying—soaring in your life. Online!
There is a special joy that is natural to
our Spirits when we align with what we
are meant to be doing in our life. It is Shelley Riutta, MSE LPC - Shelley is the
a joyful, fulfilling feeling that we are on founder and President of the Global
track in our life—exactly where we are Association of Holistic Psychotherapy
meant to be. It is what everyone is and Coaching, and creator of a 6-Figure
longing for—and for good reason—this Holistic Psychotherapy Practice. After
is the feeling that you are meant to be experiencing great success with holistic
techniques in her own practice, she
feeling each and every day.
launched the Global Association of Holistic
Psychotherapy and Coaching (GAHP) which
supports Therapists, Healers, Coaches
and Health Practitioners to learn more
about holistic methods and develop their own 6-Figure
Holistic Practices. Get your free Holistic Practice Building Kit at
www.thegahp.com.

89

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