Вы находитесь на странице: 1из 3

Analytical essay on Miguel Syjuco’s “Be Here Now”

There are experiences you cannot recover from. If a person has seen things so horrible that they
are beyond comprehension, it most likely will leave some sort of mark on the individual in
question. This is what the narrator in Miguel Syjuco’s short story “Be here Now” from 2012
struggles with. He has been to a war-torn country, and he has seen things.

The story starts out as the narrator has just returned home to his fiancé, Jenna, after quite some
time away. Apparently, he is a news photographer, since he says he has been “shooting” a lot. It is
hinted throughout the story that he has been covering “pro-democracy rallies” and other possibly
middle eastern things. Therefore, it is only logical to assume that the cause of his problems is
whatever he has seen during his time in the middle east.

The entire story takes place in the narrators newly purchased house, while he struggles to adapt to
his calm surroundings. Jenna tries to make him feel at home, but it does not seem to go her way,
even though she tries hard. It becomes obvious that the narrator has a tough time settling in. An
example could be this brief passage:

“I know I won’t be able to sleep. I know by experience that it takes at least a week to negotiate the
limbo between this world and the one I’ve left behind. Usually, as now, I say it’s jet lag. Every day
we fool ourselves, though some of us are more deserving of illusions.” (Page 3, ll. 64-67)

The narrator simply knows that he will not sleep. He cannot stop thinking about the world he has
left. The contrast between his own “picket-fence” life, and the life he briefly got to experience is
simply too great for him to just ignore.

The narrator is a homodiegetic first-person narrator, as he is the protagonist, and he takes part in
the plot. The fiancé, Jenna, appears a bit vague, as we never really get to her thoughts. The cause
is internal focalization: we perceive everything through the eyes of the narrator, and therefore it is
impossible to know what Jenna is thinking at any point in the story. However, a few things become
clear about Jenna: She is hard-working, and she does most things perfectly. At least through the
eyes of the narrator.

Returning to the narrator and his mind, this quote exemplifies the damage he has sustained quite
clearly:
A microwave with unblistered buttons and walls still spatterless. The fridge unburdened, free of the
steeped scents and mysterious residue of condiments collected in the ridges of the shelves. (Page 2,
ll. 3-5)

It becomes obvious that his mind is seriously damaged, as he can see things others cannot. He has
seen so many horrendous places, that it appears weird to him when a fridge is clean, or when a
wall is spatterless. One could make the argument that the narrator is suffering from post-
traumatic stress and possibly also a depression. He really struggles to find joy, where others find it
easily. It is easy to spot this tendency throughout the story, as the narrator wanders through the
house struggling to find anything that can calm his nerves. He sits for a while with his laptop, and it
becomes apparent that he suddenly cannot relate to anyone on his Facebook page. He reflects on
the absurdity of social media. How we are so obsessed with capturing the “perfect” moments of
our imperfect lives, while people are struggling to stay alive elsewhere. The depression is made
clear in the following lines:

“I lie down beside Jenna and watch her sleeping. Her eyelids flicker with REM sleep. She smiles at
something. She giggles. Where has she gone that makes her so happy? How can I get there?” (Page 6, ll.
152-154)

He simply cannot see how he can ever get to a happy place again, after his experiences in the middle east.
Jenna seems to be in her happy place, while he just sits beside her contemplating how she ever got to be
that happy. This is a common symptom of depression. To add to his misery, he describes his life as
monotonous:

“Each following day passes like its predecessor: Unpacking. Hanging. Arranging. Eating. Talking. Avoiding
discussing the wedding plans, pretending I’m a typical guy.” (Page 6, ll. 155-161)

The narrator is just going through the motions, as he does not want to do anything anymore. Fortunately,
the ending of the short story points to the fact that he does want to get better.

As he is going through some old things in the garage, he finds a daruma doll. The dolls eyes symbolize
strong determination and good fortune. He sits for a while, and then he remembers his father’s word:

“… my father explaining that darumas are symbols of good fortune and strong determination. People paint
in one eye when they set out to do something, he said, and they paint in the other when that something is
done.” (Page 6, ll. 177-180)
The narrator starts painting one of the dolls eyes shortly after his flashback. This must mean that after the
story ends, he sets out to combat his problems, so that he can live a normal life with Jenna.

The narrator is, in the end, a man of action. He quickly realises that he has accumulated quite a few
problems during his time away, and they will not resolve themselves. He must act.

Post-traumatic stress is a very serious condition, and it must be treated as such. Fortunately, the main
character in this short story is aware that something is off.

Вам также может понравиться