Discovering Individual Values and Attitudes For Success - Final Draft

Running head: DIVAS – PROMOTING POSITIVE SOCIAL INTERACTIONS 1
Discovering Individual Values and Attitudes for Success (DIVAS)
A Group for Middle School Girls Exhibiting Relationally Aggressive Behavior
Nina Brashears
University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill

DIVAS – PROMOTING POSITIVE SOCIAL INTERACTIONS 2
Discovering Individual Values and Attitudes for Success (DIVAS)
DIVAS (Discovering Individual Values and Attitudes for Success) is a group for
6th grade girls to promote positive social interactions, attitudes, and relationships to
impact eventual academic and behavioral success through exploration of individual
differences, friendship, and conflict resolution. This group focuses on girls that have
exhibited behavior related to relational aggression in order to promote improvement in
their social, behavioral, and emotional development. Given the transitional nature of
middle school and the importance of peer groups in development, this group will target a
specific group of students to give them experiences and skills that impact their own
understanding of themselves and positively influence their interactions with their peers.
Rationale and Literature Review
The group DIVAS is developed specifically to address issues of relational
aggression. Crick, Casas, and Nelson (2002) defined relational aggression as “behaviors
that harm others through damage (or the threat of damage) to relationships or feelings of
acceptance, friendship or group inclusion” (p. 77). This term captures ideas of bullying,
violence, and aggression, yet focuses on the behaviors that are purposefully harmful to
social relationships. Relational aggression may include eye rolling, ignoring, building
alliances, teasing, put downs, spreading rumors, gossiping, forming exclusive groups and
in most cases it is intentional and hurtful (Kraemer-Naser, 2010). Orpinas, McNicholas,
and Nahapetyan (2015) noted that the term “relational aggression” did not appear in
literature until 1995, so the literature around this issue is relatively new. Additional
research also may use the term “indirect aggression” or “social aggression” but these
terms are connected to relational aggression in that they all emphasize “emotional or
relational harm rather than actual physical harm” (Boutin, Verlaan, Denault, & Dery,
2017, p. 175).
Within the literature of relational aggression there are usually three categories of
individuals present: victims/targets, aggressors/perpetrators, and bystanders/collaborators.
Relationally aggressive behaviors can be present at any age, however much of the focus
in the literature was on these behaviors during adolescence (Boutin, 2017). According to
Espelage and Holt (2001), 6th graders reported more teasing and bullying behaviors than
7th and 8th graders, highlighting the importance of interventions during this transitional
period to middle school. Moreover, it has been shown that adolescents who are
“cognitively sophisticated” are more likely to engage in the manipulative and harmful
actions, emphasizing a connection between bullying behaviors and sophisticated social
cognition (Yoon, Barton, Tairiol, 2004, p.306).
Within the research some gender differences in frequency, impact, and purpose of
relational aggression are noted. According to Yoon, Barton, and Tairiol (2004) boys and
girls both experience relational aggression, but “girls perceive it as more hurtful than
boys do” (p. 305). Orpinas, et al. (2015) noted that relational victimization was associated
with low academic performance for girls. Orpinas, et al. (2015) also noted gender
differences, specifically that more boys than girls were characterized as being in the low
victimization group, with 61.2% of boys reporting low incidents of victimizations and
only 38.8% of girls reporting the same. The majority of research focuses on the impact
and prevalence of relational aggression in girls.
Noting these gender differences between females and males some researchers
have presented an evolutionary theory to explain relational aggression between females.

Vaillancoirt, Miller, and Sharma (2010) explain that from this perspective women may be
using relational aggression towards those they view as rivals of a desired mate. While
there are limitations to a evolutionary perspective of these behaviors, this theory can be
connected to Ellis, Crooks, and Wolfe’s (2009) assertion that “peer aggressors may feel
insecure in their relationships and are likely embedded in similar networks that use
gossip, ridicule, and exclusion as strategies to control social affiliations and create
exclusivity” (p. 255). Additionally, arguments for the focus on girls and relationship
aggression have postulated “girls may be particularly sensitive to fairness and reciprocity
in social relationships and therefore be more observant of social exclusion incidents”
(Orpinas, et al., 2015).
In a study Orpinas, et al. (2015) operationalized perpetration and victimization as
occurring in different levels described as high, moderate, and low. Much of the literature
explores connections and results of the groups of individuals that are on the high levels of
perpetuation and victimization. Victims of relational aggression “tend to be more
depressed, anxious, and have lower self esteem” (Yoon, et al., 2004, p.307). Additionally,
students that are frequent targets are more likely to be rejected by their peer groups and
have the potential to view themselves as the cause of mistreatment and lack of acceptance
by others (Yoon, et al., 2004, p.307). Orpinas, et al. (2015) reported no significant racial
differences in likelihood of victimization.
Individuals that are relationally aggressive also have poor outcomes and tend to
exhibit other behaviors. In the context of social relationships, Orpinas, et al. (2015) found
that relationally aggressive girls were more likely to perceive their peers’ behavior as
intentionally aggressive, a characteristic aligned with aggressive attribution bias.

According to Yoon et al. (2004) “relationally aggressive girls are more likely to
experience externalizing symptoms associated with oppositional defiant and conduct
disorders” (p. 307). Ellis, et al. (2009) specified that girls that were perpetrators of
relational aggression in both peer and dating relationships were more likely to exhibit
delinquent behavior. Additionally, compared to less aggressive children, children and
young adults that exhibit relational aggression are more likely to be disliked by others
and exhibit a lack of pro-social behavior (Yoon, et al., 2004, p.307). Orpinas et al. (2015)
found that aggression decreased with age, but that the students characterized by high
levels of perpetration of relational aggression may be more likely to engage in physical
aggression and other behaviors that are detrimental to their health and well-being.
Additionally, Ellis, et al. (2009) argued that delinquent behavior may be the result of
“chaotic” or possibly abusive relationships and these behaviors are the result of “social
frustrations and negative interactions” from their current social relationships (p. 258).
Ellis, et al. (2009) argued that since young adults that show relational aggressive in many
cases are part of peer groups with high instances of relational aggression it is very
possible that the aggressors may becomes a victim at some point.
It is important to consider the peer context of relational aggression, especially
during adolescence when acceptance and participation in peer groups is a big influence in
a young adult’s life. Crick, et al. (1996) found that friend groups that were characterized
as “intimate” and “exclusive” often fostered more aggression towards peers within the
group rather than to those that were not in the group. Yoon, et al. (2004) argued that
“relational aggression may be endorsed and collaborated by other students in a peer
group” because some relational aggressive students reported similar number and intimacy
levels with friends (p. 308). Yoon, et al. (2004) identified a need to further explore peer
influences in relationally aggression and how certain groups or cliques could promote or
discouraged relational aggression. Ellis et al. (2009) noted the importance of recognizing
that many perpetrators of relational aggression participate within highly volatile
networks. Boutin, Verlaan, Denault, and Dery (2017) argued that extroverted girls might
continue to engage in relational aggression due to reinforcement in the form of status and
admiration from peers. From this finding, they argue that the drive for status and
admiration can be used to drive these girls to seek out more rewarding experiences in
general (Boutin, et al., 2017).
One area of intervention mentioned as a precursor to conflict resolution, involves
understanding and exploring individual differences. Yoon, et al. (2004) described how
relationally aggressive behaviors can be counteracted by “promoting the respect of
individual differences among students” (p. 313). Barton (2000) elaborates on this topic by
connecting the teaching of tolerance, acceptance, and respect with “effective
communication and constructive resolution” (p. 108). In consideration of conflict
resolution skills, Yoon, et al. (2004) argued “increased social understanding and conflict
resolution abilities are critical skills in developing and maintaining close peer
relationships” (p. 306). More specifically, interventions “should include discussions of
specific examples that involve relational aggression through which students not only
learn to successfully resolve conflicts but also build a climate of disapproving it” (Yoon,
et al., 2004, p.312).
Given the trends in the research, the DIVAS group will be focused on girls and 6th
graders as they transition to middle school and since the studies showed no strong
differences along demographic characteristics the group will be diverse. The screening
process of the group must take into account characteristics of aggressors along with
consideration of the social contexts in which students participate. Finally, the
interventions will consider individual differences, help to distinguish between a positive
friendship and a negative friendship, as well as give the participants opportunities to
develop skills for conflict resolution and positive interaction; all interventions and themes
discussed within the literature.
Goals
At the end of the sessions each participant will be able to (1) identify at least three
characteristics of a positive friendship (2) describe at least two conflict resolution
strategies, (3) define terms related to relational aggression, and (4) recognize positive
attributes in themselves and others. While this group focuses on a group of girls that have
exhibited relationally aggressive behavior, it seeks to lessen victimization within the
student’s peer group, enable aggressors to find alternatives to conflict, and promote
healthy friendships and interactions among peers.
ASCA Objectives & NC Guidance Essential Standards
ASCA Mindsets & Behaviors
M 1. Belief in development of whole self, including a healthy balance of mental,
social/emotional and physical well-being
B-SS 2. Create positive and supportive relationships with other students
B-SS 4. Demonstrate empathy
B-SS 9. Demonstrate social maturity and behaviors appropriate to the situation and
environment
North Carolina Guidance Essential Standards
RED.SE.2.2 Understand how to support positive relationship building (e.g., managing
impulsivity, adaptability, and flexibility).
P.SE.2.2 Explain how understanding differences among people can increase self-
understanding
EI.SE.3.2 Use conflict management skills to achieve desired outcomes
I.SE.2.2 Evaluate one’s own behaviors in a variety of situations, making adjustments as
needed to produce more positive results
Practical Considerations/Logistics
DIVAS focuses on 6th grade girls that have been observed by their teachers and
classmates to have exhibited relationally aggressive behaviors in their social interactions.
The group will consist of eight female participants. It is a closed group and students will
be selected from teacher and staff referrals, counselor identification, and student interest,
and then screened for participation. Emphasis will be placed in making sure different
social groups are represented. Additionally the group will be diverse in terms of racial
and ethnic identity as well as to other characteristics such as socio-economic status or
academic ability. A screening tool will be used to determine appropriateness for the
group and once selected all students must complete a parental consent form to be
accepted into the group. A screening tool that accounts for personal attributes and
understanding of social and peer groups will be essential to ensuring the makeup of the
group provides a productive environment. The group will meet for one hour, on
Wednesday mornings, for eight consecutive weeks.
Procedures and Techniques

Cognitive behavioral techniques will be utilized in this group. Cognitive
behavioral therapy (CBT) is focused on the present and strives to be psychoeductional
since it is rooted in the idea that behavior is learned. It is based on the idea that cognitive
activity influences behavior, so emphasis must be placed on changing cognition to
eventually impact a change to a target behavior. This group will be structured and
directive to include homework tasks and provide a space for students to reflect on their
thoughts and actions together. Additionally, CBT techniques consider the social contexts
in which behavior occurs and allows for consideration of multiple dimensions that can
cause or reinforce behavior. Consideration will be given to multicultural differences and
social justice, and while the group will all be female, the members will represent diversity
in other ways. Building a positive rapport among the members will allow members to be
their authentic selves in the discussion and the activities and guidance from the counselor
will provide opportunities for students to reach across lines of difference, yet also affirm
connections with each other.
Evaluation plan
Each week there will be process data collected in the form of attendance and
assessment of participation level of the participants. Perception data will include a pre-
and a post-test given to the students and weekly check-ins aligned to the week’s objective
and topic. More specifically effectiveness will be measured in students’ growth in the
content knowledge, skills, and critical thinking as well as changes in their mindsets about
themselves and others. The pre- and post-test captures the data points aligned to the goal
discussed above. The counselor will look at outcome data such as behavior referrals for
this group of students after the completion of the group.

Session Outline/Plans
The specific lesson plans for each of the sessions is included in the appendices.
Lesson #1: Introduction to Group
Lesson #2: Goal Setting & Who has my heart?
Lesson #3: What is relational aggression?
Lesson #4: Friend versus Frenemy
Lesson #5: Healthy Friendships Continued
Lesson #6: Affirmations
Lesson #7: Conflict Resolution Strategies
Lesson #8: Wrap-up, Reflections, and Commitment

References
Barton, E. A. (2000). Leadership strategies for safe schools. Arlington Heights, IL:
Skylight Professional Development.
Book Camps for Kids. Retrieved July 3, 2017, from:
http://craftycounseling1.blogspot.com/2012/07/book-camps-for-kids.html
Boutin, S., Verlaan, P., Denault, A., & Déry, M. (2017). Early risk predictors of girls’
indirect aggression from childhood to early adolescence in an at-risk sample. Sex
Roles, 76(3), 175-187.
Crick, N. R., Bigbee, M. A., & Howes, C. (1996). Gender differences in children’s
normative beliefs about aggression: How do I hurt thee? Let me count the ways.
Child Development, 67, 1003-1014
Crick, N. R., Casas, J. F., & Nelson, D. A. (2002). Toward a more comprehensive
understanding of peer maltreatment: Studies of relational victimization. Current
Directions in Psychological Science, 11(3), 98-101.
Ellis, W. E., Crooks, C. V., & Wolfe, D. A. (2009) Relational aggression in peer and
dating relationships: Links to psychological and behavioral adjustment. Social
Development, 18, 253 –269.
Espelage, D. L., & Holt, M. K. (2001). Bullying and victimization during early
adolescence: Peer influences and psychosocial correlates. Journal of Emotional
Abuse, 2, 123-142.
Kraemer-Naser, L.A. (2010). It has a name. The Ophelia Project. Retrieved from
http://www.opheliaproject.org/GirlsRA/GirlsMS.pdf
Orpinas, P., McNicholas, C., & Nahapetyan, L. (2015). Gender differences in trajectories
of relational aggression perpetration and victimization from middle to high
school: Gender differences trajectories relational aggression. Aggressive
Behavior, 41(5), 401-412.
Ten Lessons for Teaching Conflict Resolution Skills. Retrieved July 10, 2017, from:
http://www.creducation.org/resources/CR_Guidelines_and_10_CR_lessons_FCP
S.pdf
Vaillancourt, T., Miller, J. L., & Sharma, A. ( 2010) “Tripping the prom queen”: Female
intrasexual competition and indirect aggression. In: K. Osterman (Ed.), Indirect
and direct aggression (pp. 17–31). Frankfurt am Main, Germany: Peter Lang.
Yoon, J. S., Barton, E., & Taiariol, J. (2004). Relational aggression in middle school:
Educational implications of developmental research. Journal of Early
Adolescence, 24(3), 303-318.

Appendix A
Screening Questionnaire Interview Questions
1. How would you describe your friendship group? What is your role in the group?
2. Would you like to participate in a group about friendship?
3. Are you willing to share your honest thoughts and feelings with others in a group?
4. Are you willing to share about yourself and your identity?
5. Who are your closest friends?
6. Who are classmates that you cannot stand to be around?
7. Have you ever spread rumors about someone?
8. What do you do when a friend makes you mad?

Appendix B
Pre and Post Group Test
Content (Open-ended questions)
1. What are three characteristics of a positive friendship?
2. How could you handle a conflict with friends? Name at least 2 ways
3. What is the difference between physical aggression, relational aggression, and verbal
aggression?
4. What is an example of physical aggression, relational aggression, and verbal
aggression?
5. What are the roles that individuals have in relational aggression?
6. What is an example of an affirmation?
7. What do you do to contribute to a positive friendship?
Perceptions (Scaling Questions)
Statement Strongly Agree Neutral Disagree Strongly

Agree Disagree
If someone disagrees with me we can’t be
friends.
Sometimes it is ok to hurt someone on
purpose.
I don’t have to be friends with everyone,

but I do have to show respect.
It is more important to be right than to be

liked.
I am comfortable giving compliments to
others.
Friendships should be balanced and
positive.
All of my friends like me.
I solve conflicts by getting even.
Being popular is more important than being

kind.
Appendix C1
Lesson Plan #1
School Counselor: Nina Brashears Date: 2017-2018
Activity: Lesson #1-Introduction to the Group and to Each Other
Grade(s): 6th (but can be adapted to fit other grades/levels)
ASCA and NCGES Student Standards (Domain/Standard/Competencies):
B-SS 7. Use leadership and teamwork skills to work effectively in diverse teams
understanding
Learning Objective(s):
1. Students will be able to understand the purpose of the group and role expectations.
2. Students will create common group norms.
3. Students will share about themselves.
Materials: poster paper, markers, stickers, star template (see appendix C2), copies of pre-
test (appendix B)
Procedure:
(1) Introductions: [10 minutes] The group will go around and introduce names, they will
each share a funny story about their name (how they got it, when people messed it up,
nicknames, etc.)
(2) Introduction to the group [10 minutes]: The group will be led in a discussion of the
purpose of the group and the roles for the members and counselor. The discussion will
also emphasize confidentiality.
(3) Rules/norms discussion [15 minutes]: The group will brainstorm places that have
rules or norms. Together the group will come up with reasons for why rules exist (safety,
everyone on the same page, common expectations, etc.). In pairs students will
brainstorm list of goals or norms for the group. As a large group all the options will be
written on a large poster board/paper. Each group member will be given 3 stickers, they
will vote for which 3 rules they think are the most important. The whole group’s top 5
rules will be written on a poster to be referenced throughout the group time. All members
will sign their names on the final poster of norms signifying their agreement.
(4) Star [15 minutes]: Group members will complete the Star template about themselves
(see appendix C2), then they will share their stars with the group. The stars will be put
around the ground rules poster to be brought out during each session.
(5) Pre-test: [10 minutes] Students will complete the pre-test questionnaire to be a data
point to be compared at the end of the program for group evaluation and effectiveness
analysis.
Homework: Students will review the group participation expectations/norms/agreement
and come with any questions to the next session.
Plan for Evaluation: How will each of the following be collected?
Process Data: Attendance will be collected during the session.
Perception Data: Student pre-test data will be collected. (see appendix B)

Outcome Data: No outcome data at this time. Outcome data will be collected and
monitored at the conclusion of the group.
Follow Up: Monitor group members at school for both behavioral and academic
concerns. Make sure parental contact has been made with all families.
Appendix C2
Example Adapted from personal resource
Template
Appendix D1
Lesson Plan #2
Activity: Lesson #2- Goal Setting & Who has my heart?
understanding
(1) Students will be able to reflect on the people and things that have value in their life.
(2) Students will be able to understand the goals of the group and articulate their own
personal goals.
Materials: Group Rules/Norms (from last session), copy paper, markers, index cards
Procedure:
(1) Opening [15 minutes]: The group will be brought back to together with a reminder of
the group norms/rules (poster from last session will be posted) and another chance to
remember names. There will be a check-in with each participant to get a rating on how
they are feeling today (1-10) and 1 word to describe what they thought or felt about the
first session of the group.
(2) Part of Heart [25 minutes]: Group members will draw a large heart on a sheet of copy
paper. Students will indicate the people and things that “have a place in their heart” by
dividing the heart into sections. This will include important people and things that the
student values. This will give insight into the people that have the student’s back and
what things are important in the life of the student. After everyone has completed the
hearts they will be shared out to the group to find connections and to further understand
the other group members.
(3) Goal Setting [20 minutes] The counselor will review the goals for the group to
accomplish during the duration of the 8 sessions. Then students will be given a chance to
write 1 or 2 personal goals about what they want to accomplish through participation in
the group. This may include goals about how to participate in the group or goals for using
the skills learned in group.
Homework: Students will be challenged to remember the components from the heart
activity and come back next week with reflections on any people or things that were not
included but still hold value to the student.
Process Data: Attendance will be collected during each session.
Perception Data: Student heart activity responses and individual goals can be analyzed
for themes and used as a qualitative data point.
concerns.
Appendix E1
Lesson Plan #3
Activity: Lesson #3- What is relational aggression?
environment
(1) Students will be able to identify examples of relational, verbal, and physical
aggression.
(2) Students will be able to explore the roles of aggressor, victim, and bystander.
(3) Students will be able to reflect on the feelings associated with being in the role of
aggressor or victim in a situation.
Materials: Toilet paper, markers, bathroom (if not available use 3 buckets),
physical/verbal/relational aggression signs, scenario printed, aggressor/victim/bystander
definitions, tape
Procedure:
(1) Opening [10 minutes]: Group shares out their thoughts about the group so far and
what they are thinking about the other members. Members can also reflect on their
homework assignment from the previous session to share any additions or thoughts about
the heart activity.
(2) “Flushing Away Aggression”: [15 minutes] Each girl will be given several squares of
toilet paper and they will write down ways they have seen girls hurt each other
(examples: tripping, name calling, put-downs, yelling, spreading rumors, talking behind
someone’s back…) The terms physical, aggression, verbal aggression, and relational
aggression are introduced and defined for the group (see appendix E2). The group goes to
the bathroom and on each stall door are the three types of aggression. The girls will
decide which type of aggression their slips of toilet paper represent. They put it in the
toilet and flush it away.
(3) Debrief: [15 minutes] The group is led in a discussion of what are their thoughts about
the three different types of aggression and what they were thinking during the activity.
Questions will lead the group to consider how aggression can take many forms but it
hurtful and harmful. The counselor will focus the girls to specifically think about
relational aggression in this group.
(4) Roles in Aggression: [15 minutes] the group will split into 3 groups and each will
read about the 3 common roles in aggression (see appendix D2). They will share out to
the group about target/victims, aggressors, and bystanders. It will be explored how
anyone can be a target/victim or an aggressor and that each person as the power to
assume or reject any role. The group will explore feelings associated with these roles
within relational aggression.

(5) Closing [5 minutes]: Individually the girls will receive a scenario and they must write
how the aggressor and the target/victim would be thinking in the situation. This will not
be shared with the group but rather collected as a data point.
Homework: Students will reflect on times they have seen relational aggression and come
to the next group with the situation to be able to share.
Perception Data: Students’ responses to the scenario from the perspective of the
aggressor and the victim will be collected as a data point.
concerns.
Adapted from: http://www.opheliaproject.org/GirlsRA/GirlsMS.pdf

Appendix E2
Definitions for use in Lesson #3
Aggressor: The person who chooses to hurt or damage a relationship.
Target/Victim: The person who is aggressed upon or bullied
Bystander: the person or people who are not aggressors or targets but are caught
somewhere in between.
Relational Aggression: Behavior that is intended to harm someone by damaging or
manipulating his or her relationships with others
Physical Aggression: Harm through damage or threat of damage to another’s physical
well-being
Verbal Aggression: Obvious and/or hidden verbal acts of aggression toward another,
such as threats, putdowns and name calling
Scenario for final activity:
Who is the aggressor? What would she be thinking?
Who was the target? How would she be thinking?

Appendix F1
Lesson Plan #4
Activity: Lesson #4-Friend versus Frenemy
(1) Students will be able to articulate characteristics of healthy and unhealthy friendships.
(2) Students will associate actions, words, and feelings with healthy or unhealthy
friendships.
Materials: Poster paper, markers, post-its, notebook or computer paper
Procedure:
(1) Opening [15 minutes]: Group will share their thoughts on last week’s group. The
group will then discuss a time that a friend showed them that they “had their back.” The
discussion will be guided by the counselor to include reflection on the situation, actions
by the friend, and the feelings and thoughts associated with the interaction.
(2) Healthy vs. Unhealthy Friendship: [10 minutes] The group will read definitions of
healthy and unhealthy friendships along with the difference between a manipulative or a
dependent friendship (see appendix F2). Given the definition the girls will first react to a
partner and then share out their thoughts to the group.
(3) Friend vs. Frenemy: [15 minutes] Three poster papers will be hung on the wall. Each
will be split into 2 categories (Friend/Frenemy). They will be labeled (a) What they
do?/How they treat others? (b) what they say? (c) how they make you feel? Each girl will
be given 2 post-its (6 total) and be directed to write a response that fits the category. After
3-5 minutes of thinking and writing time the girls will put their post-its on the poster.
When everyone has put up their ideas, then silently the group will read the responses of
others.
(4) Discussion: [15 minutes] After completing the activity the girls will share their
thoughts and feelings in defining these roles and what friendship means to them.
(5) Reflection [5 minutes]: Students will silently and independently make another
personal t-chart on their piece of paper, labeling categories for Friend and Frenemy. They
will make a list of specific people or situations from their own life that fits into the
categories paying specific attention to their thoughts about each title.
Homework: Students will think about the Friends and Frenemies in their life and decide
during the next week which role do they play. They may also take their personal t-chart
from the last activity with them and add any thoughts they have during the week.
Perception Data: The group’s t-charts with post-its will be a data point.

concerns.
Adapted from: http://craftycounseling1.blogspot.com/2012/07/book-camps-for-kids.html

Appendix F2
Healthy Friendship: a friendship in which both members generally like each other and
share balanced power (friend)
Unhealthy Friendship: a friendship in which one member does not like the other or
when there is an imbalance of power (frenemy)
Dependent friendship: someone chooses to go along with the will of another because he
wants to avoid making a choice for himself.
Manipulative friendship: the person who is not making the decision is coerced or forced
into going along with someone else.
Example t-chart (for large group posters and individual activity at the end)
Appendix G1
Lesson Plan #5
Activity: Lesson #5-Healthy Friendships Continued
(1) Students will be able to discuss healthy friendships and how to show respect to
everyone.
(2) Students will assess whether a friendship is healthy or unhealthy.
(3) Students will consider their own friendships and classify them as healthy or
unhealthy.
Materials: paper, markers
Procedure:
(1) Opening/Discussion [15 minutes]: The group will talk about their homework from
the last group where they noticed the roles of friends and frenemies in their lives. Then
using the following questions the group will reflect about the meaning of friendship and
how even though they do not have to be friends with everyone the goal should be to
avoid aggression because all people deserve to be treated with respect.
Can an unhealthy friendship last? How long?
What would cause an unhealthy friendship to dissolve?
Is any friendship healthy all of the time?
Can a friendship sometimes be healthy and sometimes be unhealthy?

What are some ways you can think of to make the unhealthy friendships in the
story healthier without hurting the feelings of others in the friendship?
Does every person hold the potential to be your friend? Why or why not?
Do you have to establish healthy friendships with everyone?
(2) Healthy vs. Unhealthy Friendships [5 minutes]: Reviewing the work from last session,
the group will explore characteristics of healthy vs. unhealthy friendships. See model in
appendix G2. Additionally the flow chart will be introduced that includes questions to
consider whether a friendship is healthy or unhealthy (appendix G3).
(3) Friendship Scenario [25 minutes]: Together as a group the members will read the
scenario in appendix G4. As a group the members will model using the flow chart to
assess the friendship between Alexandra and Vicki. {answer: reciprocal but unbalanced
manipulative friendship – unhealthy} Then the group members will split into pairs and be
assigned a friendship from the scenario to consider. After 5-10 minutes of work time
together the pair will share with the other groups what they assessed the friendship to be.
-Tina & Alexandra: healthy
-Tina & Vicki: unhealthy (no reciprocal)
-Greta & Team: unhealthy (reciprocal but unbalanced and dependent)
-Greta & Tina: unhealthy (reciprocal but a give and take)
(4) Closing [15 minutes]: The group will share and reflect on the process of classifying
friendships. The counselor will remind the members that healthy friendships can provide
support, bolster self-confidence, and work against aggression. As an exit ticket students
will write down an action that a specific friend type would do (and write the name of a
person if they have experienced this type of friendship).
Homework: Students will think about their friends and reflect on what they think about
their friendships now that they have titles such as health/unhealthy or
manipulative/unbalanced/etc.
Perception Data: Students’ work on identifying friendships in the scenario and the
individual reflections from the exit ticket will be collected as data points.
concerns.

Appendix G2
Definitions
Healthy Friendship: a friendship in which both members generally like each other and
share balanced power (friend)
Unhealthy Friendship: a friendship in which one member does not like the other or
when there is an imbalance of power (frenemy)
Dependent friendship: someone chooses to go along with the will of another because he
wants to avoid making a choice for himself.
Manipulative friendship: the person who is not making the decision is coerced or forced
into going along with someone else.
Appendix G3
Appendix G4
Appendix H1
Lesson Plan #6
Activity: Lesson #6-Affirmations
understanding
(1) Students will recognize positive affirmations and compliments.
(2) Students will give an affirmation or compliment message to a member of the group.
Materials: Dove Chocolate (with affirmations written on the inside), paper, markers,
slips of papers with group member names
Procedure:
(1) Opening/Discussion [15 minutes]: The group will check-in with the members and
gauge their feelings at this point in the group. The members can share what has been
something that has “stuck with them” after 5 weeks in the group. Then, to start the
conversation on this session’s topic the group will watch the following video with no
words.
(https://youtu.be/QGYAopYtj5Q) After watching they will reflect on what is the
message of the video and how it connects to the topics that have been discussed
thus far.
(2) What is a compliment or affirmation? [15 minutes]: Each member of the group will
receive a Dove chocolate and will read and share the affirmation listed on the inside. The
group will talk about how affirmations are encouraging, positive, and uplifting to the
person that receives them. Volunteers will practice giving compliments to each other. The
group leader may choose to make a list of compliments/affirmations.
(3) Affirmation for the group [15 minutes]: Each girl will pick out 2 names randomly
from a bucket/basket of people in the group (they will not get themselves). They must
write and decorate a 1/ 2 sheet of paper with an affirming message to their chosen people
and then give it to the person.
(4) Commitment [15 minutes]: Students will identify 3 people or situations in the coming
week where they could give a compliment or affirmation to someone in their life. Also
students will brainstorm the names of songs that have affirmation, empowerment, or
positive messages.
Homework: The girls must give their compliment/affirmation to the people they
identified and be prepared to share how it made them feel when they return the group.
Also, students that would like to will give the counselor the name of songs that includes
affirmation, empowerment, or positive in their message so the song can be played for the
opening of the next session.

Perception Data: Students examples of affirmations will be recorded as a data point.
concerns.
Appendix I1
Lesson Plan #7
Activity: Lesson #7- Conflict Resolution Strategies
environment
EI.SE.3.2 Use conflict management skills to achieve desired outcomes.
(1) Students will be able to analyze a situation for conflicts and points of views.
(2) Students will explore positive actions to take in conflict resolution and management.
Materials: Method of playing music (phone, laptop, etc.), copies of appendix I2
Procedure:
(1) Opening [15 minutes]: Counselor will play 1 or 2 of the songs that students said
motivated them with the affirmations in the message from the homework assignment.
Students will reflect on what they are thinking and feeling as they listen and how they
thought or felt giving affirmations in the situations during the last week. The counselor
will then direct the group to the topic of Conflict Resolution. Students will reflect on
when they have had a conflict with a friend, what happened, what were they thinking, and
what were they feeling.
(2) Conflict Scenario: [15 minutes] Two students will read an example of a conflict.
Together as a group they will determine what is the conflict. Also, the group will discuss
how each person was feeling in the situation and explain how the perspectives on the
same situation were different.
Person A: You’ve recently bought a pair of expensive shoes. Your friend has been
posting on Snapchat pictures of your shoes with comments about how ugly the
shoes are and only losers wear shoes like that. You feel hurt and violated that
your friend is posting behind your back.
Person B: Your friend’s been bragging about his or her expensive shoes to
everyone. Yesterday he or she made fun of the way you were dressed in front of
your entire class. You felt humiliated and angry, so you decided to teach her a
lesson and post on SnapChat about how stupid their shoes are so people would
think about the shoes instead of your outfit from yesterday.
Ask for volunteers to play the roles of the 2 students and act out a GOOD way to handle
the situation. The group will debrief the role play and decide what was good and why in
the scenario.
(3) How to deal with conflict? [20 minutes]: The counselor will guide the group in a
discussion about why positive conflict resolution is important in friend and peer groups.
Guidance will be given about how conflicts can have resolution between two people and
in most cases bringing others into the problem causes more conflicts and drama. Together
the group will look at the tips included in appendix I2. Students will share which tip
seems easiest and hardest to do. Additionally students can share if they have ever used
one of these strategies. The counselor will connect conflict resolution to healthy
friendships.
(4) Reflection: [10 minutes] Students will read the following statements and write their
thoughts and feelings about the statements. These will be submitted to the counselor not
shared with the group.
 Conflict is a part of life–it can be a positive part of life, an instrument of growth.
 Conflict can be good or bad depending on how we learn to deal with it.
 Every time we interact with someone there is a potential for conflict because
people’s needs and expectations may not be the same.
 Disagree with ideas or behavior, not people.
Perception Data: Responses to the final activity will give insight into cognition and will
reflect
concerns.
Adapted from:
http://www.creducation.org/resources/CR_Guidelines_and_10_CR_lessons_FCPS.pdf
Appendix I2
Adapted from:
http://www.creducation.org/resources/CR_Guidelines_and_10_CR_lessons_FCPS.pdf
Appendix J1
Lesson Plan #8
Activity: Lesson #8: Wrap Up, Reflection, Commitment
Grade(s): 6th
environment
understanding
Materials: Copies of the post-test, paper plates, markers, paper
Procedure:
(1) Opening [15 minutes]: The group leader will lead the group in reflecting as the group
comes to the final session about 1 or 2 thoughts each member has as they think about the
group. Then members will talk about the things that impacted them the most during all
the sessions.
(2) Paper Plate Mask [20 minutes]: Given all the activities in the group each member will
create a “mask.” The mask will have a face or eyes on the front but both sides of the
paper plate will be written on. On the front (facing outward) students will put what others
will see them doing based on things learned in the sessions (examples: giving
affirmations to others, showing respect, calming down before talking), on the back
(facing inward) the student will write phrases of self-talk or thoughts that will help guide
their behavior as they move on from attending the group (example: everyone deserves
respect, I should solve my conflict directly with the person and not involve others). If
they would like to share they can choose to share with the group.
(3) Public Commitment [15 minutes]: Each member will complete the following sentence
starters on a sheet of paper to be shared in the group.
I commit to…
I will think…
I still need help with…
I will not…
I am…
(4) Post-test: [10 minutes] Each member will complete the post-test which will be
perception data compared to the first session.
Perception Data: Post-test data can be compared to the pre-test to assess the impact of the
group.
monitored from this point as the counselor looks for behavior referrals for this group.
concerns. In 6 weeks the counselor will bring the group back together to debrief about
how they have been since the group ended.

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Running head: DIVAS – PROMOTING POSITIVE SOCIAL INTERACTIONS 1

Discovering Individual Values and Attitudes for Success (DIVAS)

A Group for Middle School Girls Exhibiting Relationally Aggressive Behavior

University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill

Discovering Individual Values and Attitudes for Success (DIVAS)

impact eventual academic and behavioral success through exploration of individual

exhibited behavior related to relational aggression in order to promote improvement in

Rationale and Literature Review

The group DIVAS is developed specifically to address issues of relational

in most cases it is intentional and hurtful (Kraemer-Naser, 2010). Orpinas, McNicholas,

individuals present: victims/targets, aggressors/perpetrators, and bystanders/collaborators.

actions, emphasizing a connection between bullying behaviors and sophisticated social

cognition (Yoon, Barton, Tairiol, 2004, p.306).

and prevalence of relational aggression in girls.

have presented an evolutionary theory to explain relational aggression between females.

in social relationships and therefore be more observant of social exclusion incidents”

(Orpinas, et al., 2015).

In a study Orpinas, et al. (2015) operationalized perpetration and victimization as

perpetuation and victimization. Victims of relational aggression “tend to be more

differences in likelihood of victimization.

intentionally aggressive, a characteristic aligned with aggressive attribution bias.

experience externalizing symptoms associated with oppositional defiant and conduct

delinquent behavior. Additionally, compared to less aggressive children, children and

levels of perpetration of relational aggression may be more likely to engage in physical

possible that the aggressors may becomes a victim at some point.

It is important to consider the peer context of relational aggression, especially

“relational aggression may be endorsed and collaborated by other students in a peer

that many perpetrators of relational aggression participate within highly volatile

general (Boutin, et al., 2017).

One area of intervention mentioned as a precursor to conflict resolution, involves

relationally aggressive behaviors can be counteracted by “promoting the respect of

connecting the teaching of tolerance, acceptance, and respect with “effective

communication and constructive resolution” (p. 108). In consideration of conflict

relationships” (p. 306). More specifically, interventions “should include discussions of

et al., 2004, p.312).

consideration of the social contexts in which students participate. Finally, the

interventions will consider individual differences, help to distinguish between a positive

friendship and a negative friendship, as well as give the participants opportunities to

discussed within the literature.

characteristics of a positive friendship (2) describe at least two conflict resolution

exhibited relationally aggressive behavior, it seeks to lessen victimization within the

healthy friendships and interactions among peers.

ASCA Objectives & NC Guidance Essential Standards

ASCA Mindsets & Behaviors

M 1. Belief in development of whole self, including a healthy balance of mental,

social/emotional and physical well-being

B-SS 2. Create positive and supportive relationships with other students

B-SS 4. Demonstrate empathy

North Carolina Guidance Essential Standards

RED.SE.2.2 Understand how to support positive relationship building (e.g., managing

impulsivity, adaptability, and flexibility).

EI.SE.3.2 Use conflict management skills to achieve desired outcomes

I.SE.2.2 Evaluate one’s own behaviors in a variety of situations, making adjustments as

needed to produce more positive results

classmates to have exhibited relationally aggressive behaviors in their social interactions.

and ethnic identity as well as to other characteristics such as socio-economic status or

Wednesday mornings, for eight consecutive weeks.

Procedures and Techniques

Cognitive behavioral techniques will be utilized in this group. Cognitive

behavioral therapy (CBT) is focused on the present and strives to be psychoeductional

activity influences behavior, so emphasis must be placed on changing cognition to

cause or reinforce behavior. Consideration will be given to multicultural differences and

connections with each other.