The Familiars of Mild Curiosity

A
hulking direwolf stalks beside the ranger, a dark
panther prowls the tree tops above its bonded
druid, the blood hawk swoops to the knight's Not Looking for Any Trouble
wrist, razor talons scoring the plate armour.
The Crustacean of Conscience will always attempt to
These are mighty familiars worthy of their own
avoid combat wherever possible. This will almost
legends. What follows below... are the other never include betrayal of its partner or party but
ones. temporary abandonment is not out of the question.

Crustacean of Conscience It may roll with advantage on all attempts to

Dodge or Disengage
For some creatures, the chance to adventure alongside a
humanoid partner is a thing of great wonder. Whether it calls
to their animal instinct to hunt with a great pack leader in far
territories or to a pirimitive intelligence that speaks of Porcupine of YesterYear
oppurtunities for food, shelter and companionshiop not found
The old time were better, the youth of today don't know a
in their wilderness homes, many are willing to face terrible
damned thing and when all's said and done the whole
adversity for such a position.
kingdom has gone to the dogs.
Not so the Crustacean of Conscience. This small little
So says the Porcupine of YesterYear. Cantakerous to a
crab is fully aware that life was better under the sea, down
point, pompous to a fault and supremely unforgiving of jokes
where it's wetter, and as a result, consistently attempts to
about its "prickly" nature.
avoid all the dangers of life above the waves.

Porcupine of
YesterYear
Tiny beast, unaligned

Armor Class 12
Hit Points 7(2d6)
Speed 30ft.

STR DEX CON INT WIS CHA

Crustacean of 7 (-2) 15 (+2) 11 (+0) 2 (-4) 10 (-0) 4 (-3)

Conscience Condition Immunities charmed

Senses darkvision 60ft., passive Perception 10
Tiny beast, unaligned
Languages -
Armor Class 11 (natural armour) Challenge 1/8 (25 XP)
Hit Points 2 (1d4)
Speed 20 ft., swim 20 ft. Actions
Bite. Melee Weapon Attack: +4 to hit, reach 5ft.,
STR DEX CON INT WIS CHA one target. Hit 4 (1d4 + 2) piercing damage
2 (-4) 11 (+0) 10 (+0) 1 (-5) 8 (-1) 2 (-4) Quills. Melee Weapon Attack: +4 to hit, reach 5ft.,
one target. Hit 5 (1d6 + 2) piercing damage
Skills Stealth +2
Senses blindsight 30 ft., passive Perception 9
Languages -
Challenge 0 (10 XP) They Made It Better In My Day
Solidly of the opinion that potions were brewed
Amphibious The Crustacean of Conscience can with greater skill in its childhood, before all this
breathe air and water. new-fangled magic, the Porcupine of YesterYear has
made a study of exactly how the youth of today
Actions have gone wrong.
Claw. Melee Weapon Attack: +0 to hit, reach 5ft., Roll with advantage to identify potions and
one target. Hit 1 bludgeoning damage poisons
Badger of Etiquette
There is a way to behave properly and then there is chaos. It
may be distasteful to admit such a thin line between order
and... unseemly havoc but there it is. One must simply keep to
the right manner of behaviour and all shall be well.
None yet know where the Badger of Etiquette found his
waistcoat. The most prevalant theories rely heavily on the
madness of magicians, the perverse humour of the Gods and
even the flighty whims of the inhabitants of the Feywilds. The
Badger of Etiquette's only comment is that of course it has a
waistcoat, else it should be naked and, my goodness, such
unbecoming attire would be mortifying.
Badger of Etiquette
Tiny beast, unaligned
Armor Class 10
Hit Points 3(1d4 + 1)
Speed 20 ft., burrow 5 ft.
STR DEX CON INT WIS CHA
4 (-3) 11 (+0) 12 (+1) 2 (-4) 12 (+1) 5 (-3)
Senses darkvision 30 ft., passive Perception 11
Languages-
Challenge 0 (10 XP)
Keen Smell. The badger has advantage on Wisdom
(Perception) checks that rely on smell.
Actions
Bite. Melee Weapon Attack: +2 to hit, reach 5ft.,
one target. Hit 3 (1d4 + 2) piercing damage
A Most Sensible Waistcoat
Nothing in life could possibly be half as necessary
nor pleasing than a well-fitting waistcoat. One that
is bedecked with mystical pockets is simply an
additional bonus
The Badger of Etiquette's waistcoat is treated as
a magical item, detectable by the Detect Magic
spell, disrupted by antimagic fields and so forth.
The pockets of the waistcoat are treated as a
Bag of Holding (PHB, page 153.)
Use of the waistcoat pockets is only granted to
those who request permission from the Badger
of Etiquette with the correct social protocol and
conduct
On each attempt to gain access to the pockets,
make a DC 12 Charisma check. On success,
access is granted after the performance of the
necessary eitquette. On failure, the Badger of
Ettiquette will haughtily feign unawareness of
the requester's presence for 1d12 minutes.
Floating Stingray of Peril
Floating Stingray of Peril
If anyone knows what it is like to have so much edge that your
reflection harms mirrors, its the motherflippin' Floating
Stingray of Peril. Born in darkness, trained in shadow,
snoozing in the deep end of the paddling pool, this beast is so
stealthy that sometimes even it doesn't know where to find
itself.
Of course, like all super-extreme, apex-predator death
machines, it can also have a really hard time realising it has
encountered a superior opponent in advance of being
splatted against the nearest wall, like the ridiculous flying sea-
pancake it is...the metaphor may have been stretched a little
there.
Floating Stingray of
Peril
Tiny beast, unaligned
Armor Class 14
Hit Points 5 (2d4)
Speed 10 ft., fly 60 ft.(hover), swim 30 ft.
STR DEX CON INT WIS CHA
4 (-3) 18 (+4) 11 (+0) 2 (-4) 9 (+0) 5 (-3)
Senses darkvision 60 ft.
Languages -
Challenge 1/8 (25 XP)
Flyby. The Floating Stingray of Peril doesn't provoke
oppurtunity attacks when it flies out of an enemy's
reach.
Amphibious. The Floating Stingray of Peril can
breathe air and water.
Actions
Sting. Melee Weapon Attack: +6 to hit, reach 5ft.,
one target. Hit 1 piercing damage plus 7 (3d4)
poison damage.
Crouching Stingray, Hidden Brain
Stealth is to be unseen, unheard and unknown. It
requires great skill and greater cunning. The
Floating Stingray of Peril struggles with the latter.
When in Hiding (PHB, page 177.), each time
the Floating Stingray of Peril spots an enemy, it
must resist the urge to leap into the fray.
On sight of each new enemy or, if they are
grouped at the start of its turn, group of
enemies, the Floating Stingray of Peril must
make a DC 7 Wisdom Check
On success, it may remain hidden. On failure,
an urge to spring wildly into action compels it
to make a surprise attack at the nearest enemy.
Baby Beholder of Longing
An adult and fully powered Beholder is a creature of dread to
even the most seasoned adventurer. Their hatred of all other
life forms, even among their own kind, has led to savage
slaughter and despotic reigns over their disposable humanoid
slaves. Weilding power of a strength matched only by their
seething madness, kingdoms have turned to stone and ash
before their many eyed gaze.
This little ball of cuteness, on the other hand, is tiny, weak
and in desperate need of a caring pat between the eyestalks.
The Baby Beholder of Longing is a lonely thing and craves
above all to be accepted and... dare it even dream...cared for.
It has a hole in its heart and it wants to fill it with love. So,
for the love of Pelor, provide that before it grows up and
learns to use the hateful murder of all beings as a snuggly
hole-filling alternative.
Baby Beholder of
Longing
Tiny aberration, lawful neutral
Armor Class 12 (natural armour)
Hit Points 19 (3d10+3)
Speed 0 ft., fly 30 ft. (hover)
STR DEX CON INT WIS CHA
8 (-1) 9 (+0) 12 (+1) 13 (+1) 13 (+1) 10 (+0)
Condition Immunities prone
Senses darkvision 60 ft., passive Perception 11
Languages telepathy 60 ft., Undercommon
Challenge 1/4 (50 XP)
Actions
Bite. Melee Weapon Attack: +1 to hit, reach 5ft.,
one target. Hit 2 (1d6 - 1) piercing damage
Learner's Telekinetic Ray. The Baby Beholder of
Longing shoots a ray from its main eye, choosing a
target it can see within 60 ft. of it.
If target is a creature, it must suceed on a DC 11
Strength saving throw or the Baby Beholder of
Longing moves it up to 20 ft. in any direction. It is
released from the grip of the ray at the end of the
Baby Beholder of Longing's turn.
If the target is an object weighing 200 pounds or
less that isn't being worn or carried, it is moved up
to 20 feet in any direction. The Baby Beholder of
Longing cannot exert fine control on objects with
this ray, such as manipulating tools or opening
doors or containers.
An Unfortunate Heritage
Across almost every world in the vast sprawl of the
D&D multiverse, Beholders are feared and hated
and their offspring are no exception. NPCs, or even
party members, encountering this Familiar may
react extremely negatively, so check with your DM
if this is a feasible choice in their world and, if so,
prepare for a lot of roleplaying (which is actually
the fun part anyway!)
Yes You Are, Yes You Are
The Baby Beholder of Longing is a loyal and trusting
compainon, however its nature cannot be delayed
forever. On selecting this Familiar, roll a d6. At your
DM's discretion, this is the number of either years
or months until the Baby Beholder of Longing
reaches maturity. Should this time elapse in-game,
the Baby Beholder of Longing becomes an adult
Beholder (MM, page 28.). This alters all stats,
alignment and abilities. This also breaks its bond as
Familiar of the player and it behaves as a typical
Beholder (evil, deranged and murderous) from then
on... unless the heart of the longing child has been
filled with care and it has, at some point, been told
the exact phrase "Who's a good boy? You are! Yesh
you are!" at some point. NO META-GAMING! This
still breaks the Familiar bond but, congrats, you've
raised the first ever non-psycopathic Beholder.
Variant Ray
In the place of Learner's Telekinetic Ray you may
permenantely substitute Learner's Petrification Ray.
This change must be made before any use of this
Familiar in-game and cannot be reversed. The
mechanics are these:
The Baby Beholder of Longing shoots a ray from
its main eye, choosing a target it can see within 60
ft. of it. Roll a d20. Treat any roll between 2 to 19
as an attempt to use the Eldritch Blast cantrip, with
the caveat that damage is limited to 1d6 force
damage. On a roll of 20, the targeted creature must
make a DC 15 Dexterity saving throw to avoid
being petrified until freed by the Greater
Restoration spell or similiar. On a roll of 1, the ray
strikes the nearest party member within range, with
the same effect as a roll of 20 on an enemy.
 Skunk of Valour Sources
A rose by any other name may smell as sweet but this is not a Made in the
rose. It is a skunk. The obvious judgement may be levied at Homebrewery:http://homebrewery.naturalcrit.com/
this creature without significant challenge however, as is CRAB:
usually the case, there is more beneath the surface. Or smell, http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/parasiteeve/images/6/63/Crab.png/revis
in this instance. BEHOLDER: http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/dragons-
The Skunk of Valour may be a monochrome menace to crown/images/2/2c/Gaze.png/revision/latest?
the nearest nasal cavity but beneath the stench lies the soul cb=20130811012606
of a true knight. A chivalrous warrior of honour and principle,
as devoted to the poor as the prince and willing to charge the
most devilish foes in pursuit of a single wrong to be righted.
Armed with a curious sword fashioned from a pinecone
and clad in armour of twigs and acorns, this marvellous
knight errant is not to be sniffed at.

Skunk of Valour
Tiny beast, unaligned

Armor Class 12 (natural armour)

Hit Points 7 (2d6)
Speed 30 ft.

STR DEX CON INT WIS CHA

7 (-2) 15 (+2) 11 (+0) 2 (-4) 10 (+0) 4 (-3)

Senses darkvision 60 ft., passive Perception 10

Languages -
Challenge 1/8 (25 XP)

Actions
Bite. Melee Weapon Attack: +4 to hit, reach 5ft.,
one target. Hit 4 (1d4 + 2) piercing damage
Spray. The Skunk of Valour releases a foul smelling
gust of gas. All creatures within 10 ft. must suceed
a DC 12 Constitution saving throw or take 1d8
poison damage.

Honour Must Be Satisfied

The noble Skunk of Valour is honour bound to serve
those in need, whatever their plight or position.
Armed with crudely fashioned gear from the forest
floor, it is equipped with the following:
Pinecone Sword. 1d4 slashing damage, light
Armour of Twigs. To be treated as natural armour.
The life force of the forest flows though this to
imbue the wearer with resistance to necrotic
damage. Only equipable to the Skunk of Valour
becuase who the hell else is skunk-shaped?

2
Sources
PART 2 | BORING STUFF