Running head: CULTURAL AUTOBIOGRAPHY 1

Cultural Autobiography – Who Am I?

Danilda M. Soto

Montclair State University

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Abstract

This cultural autobiography identifies my values and beliefs in the areas of race, ethnicity,

gender, sexual orientation, social class, and religion that have been developed and supported

through my life experiences. These experiences that have led to my cultural awareness of

‘Who I Am’, based on my areas of privilege and societal influence. My cultural awareness will

help me become a more assertive professional in the field of Higher Education as I work with

student and staff to meet their needs.

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Racial Identity

We live in a country where the word race is separated into categories of black and

white; simplifying words of colors to encompass the whole human race through basic

definitions. Through my own racial identity, I am a White/Hispanic/Latina woman who has

long black hair, brown dark eyes, and light skin complexion. There is more to my racial

identity than simply categorizing my appearance based on color or the check mark of an

application. There are times where race becomes an unjust act of how we view others and

ourselves in our society. One prime example that illustrates this is the race card game we

play on people during the first five seconds of meeting a person; we are already assuming

information about another person based on our human tendency to categorize others.

Through this categorization, we use our knowledge of what society has taught us to have

blatant assumptions.

Categorizing oneself with the term white creates a fusion between one’s identity and

the culture of privilege, entitlement, control and dominance. I have always been reluctant to

utilize the term white to identify myself racially. Growing up and visiting family in the

Dominican Republic the phrase used to identify me was “La Gringa” which means the “The

White Girl”. This category is the one of white privilege that I at times overlook, and only

accept when others push it upon myself. It is a challenge to identify with this term since I

cannot identify with others as being a Dominican. I am Hispanic/Latina but I am not

Dominican; I was not born in the Dominican Republic. I am American, which means I am

White, because of my skin color and because who where I was born. Reflecting on a quote by

Rothenberg “The differences in characteristics and attitudes between those Hispanics who

call themselves white and those who identify as some other race, suggests they experience
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racial identity as a measure of belonging: Feeling white seems to be a reflection of success

and a sense of inclusion” (Rothenberg, 2008, p. 221). This resonates with my identity in so

many ways that I represent myself in terms of inclusion and experience related to my racial

identity.

In the Dominican Republic, the term race is one that is not really spoken about. The

reason I state this is because a person of my skin complexion would never be called white,

they would be called “Jabao”. The term “Jabao” would be used to identify a person of light

skin complexion because they don't believe the term white should identify anyone. My

experience as a White/Hispanic/Latina varies from experience of other Latinos. Being called

“La Gringa” and “Jabao”, come with white privilege because of my light skin and what they

identify as a person who is American. Not only as an American but the features with what is

associated to be white. To identify, as an American is a privilege that many who are from

Latino descent do not have and I take for granted. Representing myself as Latina, the term of

“white” is often given or assigned to us because of our light skin complexion. Understanding

my race has helped shape my life and understand the influence it has had on my growth as an

individual.

Ethnicity Identity

Although my race has played a great role in my development, it has also built a strong

connection with my ethnic background. Shifting away from not accepting my American

identity, it became more about embracing my culture. This acceptance came along with the

realization of how I choose to identify myself and through my culture to reinforce my

identity. Born in the United States and raised by two immigrant parents from the Dominican

Republic, my values of cultures were slightly different than all my peers growing up. I was
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raised in a predominantly Latino community but our beliefs, traditions, and cultures were all

slightly different, because my family never assimilated to the American culture. As a Latina, I

have immersed my ethnicity through what my parents taught me. This immersion includes

speaking Spanish to assimilate to my parent’s main language, blessing our elders out of

respect (Mother, Father, Aunts, Uncles, Grand Mother, Grand Father, Godparents etc.),

dancing our Latin cultural dances (Bachata, Merengue, Tipico, etc.), eating our traditional

dishes (White Rice Chicken and Beans, Mangu, Asopao, etc.), and special holidays (Easter,

Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, Christmas, etc.). These are experiences that many other Latinos

of colors go through but are experienced differently and can hold a different meaning.

This acculturation that I have experienced is very similar to many immigrant families

that live in the United States where this is not there predominated culture. Just as any

minority culture, we are different and do not have a place in the image of American.

Dominicans are different from the way that we look, our skin color, the texture of our hair,

our culture, and the ways we live up to our heritage. We are like all other group of

immigrants who cannot leave behind the power of our culture because we are different and

this difference brings us together as a community in the United States. We will always be

Latinos/a. Stating this at times can make me feel ashamed of not being able to say I am

American. Although I was born in the United States what symbolizes me is my ethnicity and

the way I was raised. The culture I live in is the one of a Hispanic/Latina/American/Women.

I feel as I resemble both the American and Latino culture

Gender Identity

Often, I question the importance of my gender identity as a woman who is not

looked upon in this area as privileged. In our culture today, much of the privilege and power
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that men have over women is unearned power. Men are sometimes unaware of their power

over women because their gender has given them superiority. For men to understand the

privilege they have over women they must be educated or willing to learn about women.

Men, unlike women, are less likely to face harassment or discrimination. If I were to choose a

career role that is not nurturing or motherly, my gender identity would be questioned

because of that non-traditional job field. Nontraditional job fields are those that have labels

of gender already identified to them. I oftentimes feel oppressed over my gender identity as

women because women must work twice as hard as men to make a point across. Women,

unlike men, have a different definition of career successes because there is always that doubt

of possibilities that women like me might not have what it takes.

These gender biases that have been constructed, are ones that are already established

by society who has developed male and female roles and expectations. These cues are not

controlled, although we might act or do things differently to push away certain stigmas and

stereotypes that are associated with our identity. Raised in a Spanish household, I was taught

that girls play with dolls and dress in pink. While boys play with trucks and dress in blue. It

was not okay for my brother to pick up a doll otherwise my parents would reprimand him,

question his sexuality and reaffirm his masculine gender identity. These stereotypical gender

roles that are given to men and women is why society becomes so critical with individuals,

and why my parents were so closed minded. Their point of view is very different from my

perspective on the matter.

I had been raised to believe these nuisance labels targeted at women and gender

roles, and this has given me a different perspective on gender identity. In “Gender Self-

Definition and Gender Self-Acceptance in Women: Interaction with Feminist, Womanist, and
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Ethnic Identities” written by Rose Marie Hoffman, she states “Gender self-definition refers to

how strong a component of one’s identity one considers one’s self-defined femininity or

masculinity to be. Individuals with very strong gender self-definition attach a great deal of

importance to their femaleness or maleness, which they view as central to their identity”

(Hoffman, p.360, 2006). Gender identity can be unique depending on the individual.

I cannot construct or judge anyone’s identity but my own. This is the reason why I am

open to how toddlers play, being a mother, I let my daughter explore what it is to play with

toys that do not conform to stereotypical gender identity, such as cars and trucks. Playing

with a truck does not mean I should question her gender identity, to me it is exploring the

outside world. In an article written by Gardner called “Choice Theory: Gender Roles and

Identity” it states, “Children who cross the boundaries of what is considered gender

appropriate may be at heightened risk for rejection, harassment, discrimination, and abuse”

(Gardner, 2015). The reason this happens it’s become at early ages children are already

being justified with the behaviors based on their gender. It is important to understand that

everyone's gender identity might not be the way society expects and these

expectations/stereotypes can affect any individual.

Sexual Orientation Identity

Heterosexual privilege is one that is invisible to those individual like myself who

have it. Being heterosexual is being part of the norm of society and culture, of what an

individual should be or look like. My heterosexual identity means being who I am regardless

of how I act, look or appear because I am what society accepts as the norm. In an article

written by Kim Case and Briana Stewart stated that “Heterosexuals currently have more

rights than lesbians and gay men in society…heterosexuals are at an advantage because their
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sexual orientation determines what is considered normal” (Case & Stewart, p.5, 2010). Those

who do not identify as a heterosexual see right through the experiences I take for granted. As

a heterosexual, I have the privilege to live without fear. Privilege that I could show affection

to my significant other, and be socially acceptance by others. Positive images of individuals

who look like myself through media, identifying with majority of individuals who are

heterosexual and not worrying about being victimized or legally marriage are all privileges I

have, and these can often be taken for granted.

Self-identifying as a heterosexual individual just leads me to be grateful I have never

had to examine or question my identity. But, seeing that also makes me feel selfish for the

privilege I have as a heterosexual. The one thing that always triggers me is how individuals

with homophobia against those who do not reflect their own identity such groups like gay,

lesbian, or bisexual. That hatred and fear, against individuals who are men and women, like

them but just a different sexual identity is wrong. I am in support towards those individuals

who make up the LGBTQ community because I do not believe in unfair treatment and have a

lot of close friends who make up that population who are just as great as me.

Social Class Identity

Raised in a working-class family, I had to learn the hard way that gender roles have

nothing to do with the success or outcome of a family. The typical gender roles that are given

to the father and mother, were totally opposite in my household from my perspective with

sustained our family together. My father was the nurturing one in my house who cooked,

cleaned, bathed the kids, did breakfast, lunch, dinner and attended all school events. While

my mother played a masculine role, who worked in a factory 40 hours a week and became

the main provider. Social class in my family was identified differently because my father
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became disabled at the age of 25 from an injury in his spine. My father's injury elicited him

from doing certain job responsibilities that could have moved us up to middle class. My

parents raised us living paycheck to paycheck. I must truly say that my parents struggle only

helped me with my ambition to better myself as an individual.

Understanding the social class I was raised in has helped me acknowledge what my

father has told me, and that is that education is the key to success. Reason I speak about

gender roles in social class is because I had to become single parent at the age of 22 and take

on both mother and female roles, I had to become the main provider for my daughter. I own

the title of working class because of my education that helped me earn a salary job that still

put me the category of working class like my family. Being part of the working class I have

taught me to use social services to help me make ends meet. Receiving food stamps,

Medicare, and child care services have sustained me and my daughter.

Although these services are temporary, they put me in a category where I have no

option but to relate to as low-social economic status. I will honestly say I have been shy to

use my food stamp cards or tell anyone I have it because I fear what other might say. But,

lately I have concluded that my struggles have only justified my actions and I am okay with

what other thinks about me. I am not an individual that is abusing the social services system

and getting services that don't pertain to me, if anything I am grateful. Grateful, that while I

am still categorized as working-class, low-socio economic status, living under poverty and

utilizing social services I have been able to further my education and better myself. I am not

an individual who will ever judge another because this has only contracted me to be a better

individual.
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Like it states in the article called “Social Class, Identity and the ‘Good’ Student:

Negotiating University Culture” written by Jane Pearce, Barry Down and Elizabeth Moore; “. . .

people are cultural beings with different patterns though, beliefs and perceptions. We act,

interact and respond to our particular world or class in the way that we understand its

meaning; we are a product of our cultural habits” (Pearce & Down & Moore, p.260, 2008).

This statement means so much to me because people usually state that we are product of our

environment. Although, we might not think these stereotype target individuals like myself

who want to brake that society norm. Pertaining to any social class we must be able to

understand one another and respect everyone’s journey.

Religious Identity

Raised in a Catholic household, a religion that orders us to be pro-life I was put

through many tests in life. This was a time in my life where I had to question my own

religious beliefs. As a child, I was not given a choice to identify with any religious culture

because my parents gave me one to identify with. I was baptized and took part of the first

communion as part of the Catholic Church. But, when I entered middle school I learned about

the different religions that exist. I started to question myself am I a true Catholic or was it

something I was just identified with by my parents. I started to acknowledge that my true

religious belief pertains to the Catholic Church in which I did not agree with other religious

beliefs. The way I worshiped god was not the same way others worshiped him. I can say I

worship God, but I am not as religious as other might say they are and I feel guilty for it. I do

not attend mass every Sunday as a good Catholic should, and for that, I get doubted by those

who follow the religion firmly. I question my religion at times and for this reason since

religious doctrine and how individuals support this can comes with a lot of contradictions.
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There are certain ways an individual is supposed to support their religion depending on their

culture or beliefs, and this may not alien with actions compared to beliefs.

This doubt that I have is one that is spoken about in an article written by Tiago

Baltazar and Ron Coffen called “The Role of Doubt in Religious Identity Development and

Psychological Maturity”. In which it states “Unbelief is a rejecting response, a resolute state of

mind involving a definitive ‘conviction of slightly regarding issues. Doubt is a hesitant

reaction, a temporary and divided state of mind created by the collision of evidence with

prior belief or one belief with another” (Baltazar & Coffin, p. 187, p.2012). This doubt that I

have about religion is not that I do not believe in a higher power it just a way that I have been

trying to understand and explore religion. Being Catholic has not made me change my

assumptions of others who do not worship like I do.

In an article written by Mette Buchardt called “Pedagogical Transformations of

‘Religion’ into ‘Culture’ in Danish State Mass Schooling from the 1900s to the 1930s”; they built

a connection with both the bible and cultures of oneself. It states that “The Bible is, in other

words, seen as a resource that should penetrate “culture”, yet simultaneously the Bible is

seen as already embedded in it” (Buchardt, p.132, 2012). The bible has already established a

culture for individuals to follow. But, I believe everyone has a different way to show their

affection towards God, in ways that some individuals might believe god has multiple saints

and some individuals might find no meaning in this. Certain religions shame people because

of the way they dress or represent themselves, and those are ways I am judged for being a

Catholic. But I cannot oppress an individual for their religious views. Once I discovered what

it is to form my own identities as an adult, I concluded I could not tell another adult how to

structure who they are. Individuals are all different and we come from different paths of life
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that at times we can only understand.

Integrative Analysis - “Where and How I Enter”

Entering this course has helped me discover and understand my privilege and marginalized

areas that make me the individual I am today. The way I once looked at diversity, I could honestly

state where filled with a lot of bias of people who were different than myself. One of the big take

away from this course is the ability to have a strong sense of self and understanding of identity and

to be able to able to surpass the judgment stage within the perception of others. Understanding who

we are gives us the ability to value the purpose of other cultures and identities. Recognizing the

inequality of others bridges the stigma that people build upon themselves and leaves open doors to

offer help to students and professionals who face challenges that come from diverse backgrounds

that are not privileged or marginalized groups.

Openness to be educated on diversity issues allowed me that space to build an initiative

with having interpersonal skills that will allow me to have a better form of communication to work

with any diverse population of students and professionals who come from different racial and

ethnic background. Issues that derive from the racial and ethnic background can be explained

further through socio-economic status, sexual orientation, gender, religion and the inequality of

social justice. These complex issues can be identified through one’s own self-reflection and greater

awareness. This brings a connection between an article written by Michal ‘MJ’ Jones called “5

Ways Marginalized People Can Recognize Their Privileges in Other Areas”, that states

“Whenever I recognize (or am told) how my privilege has caused me to overlook, oppress, or

display a sense of entitlement, a million thoughts race through my head, mainly: ‘How could Have

done this? I’m oppressed, too- I should know better by now! (Jones, p.4, 2014). Self-awareness

builds to the reflection on privilege, and the privileges one has been given. Giving us significant in
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understanding systematic oppression of individuals and oneself; which allows one to be more

socially aware of others action and behaviors.

As an individual who could relate with different group members because I identify myself

as White, Hispanic/Latina, Female, who is Heterosexual, part-takes in the working class, and

identifies with the Catholic community. Gives me a broader scope to help different individuals

throughout the university who could relate to my identities in areas they might feel represented or

underrepresented. Being that as professional in the field of Higher Education, I hold identities that

are not categorized as privilege gives me the power to help students and professional who might

relate to me. One way that I can see from my identities interrelate and change across context is my

race and ethnicity, by the ways I perceive myself and others.

Being a White Hispanic/Latina, shows how interchangeably both identities can be. In the

form that white privileged means I might symbolize an advantage for not identifying as a person of

color because I am off lighter skin complexion and am American. Like it states in the reading by

Tatum, “In the context of the United States, this system clearly operates to the advantage of Whites

and to the disadvantage of people of color (Tatum, p.7, 2003). This also shows why I might also be

looked down upon for being Hispanic/Latina Dominican Female, who has a second part of my

identity that is looked down upon because I could also identify with the traits of a person of color.

Race and ethnicity are often categorized by the way one looks, an individual’s skin color, hair

texture or the perceptions/stereotypes people make interchangeably of both words. These are both

connotations that could to me to a disadvantage or advantage of my profession in Higher

Education as I represent different student bodies and professionals.

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Utilizing Hays (2001) Model of Cultural assessment, I could compare my privileges and

marginalized identities and how these impact my profession of Higher Education professional and

which give me the most personal and least power. I realize that the one that gives me the most

personal power is being part of the social class. It is great to sometimes see how far along I have

come being a single parent and all that it has taken me to put together the pieces to my social class

identity. Part-taking of the working class and using social services to better the life of my daughter

and myself; can only relate to certain unrepresented students/professionals whose path to bettering

themselves could be of similar struggles like mines. Social class, gives a great lens to understand

the value of things we own and the reason behind one’s actions. It is always great to reflect with

individuals who have used their non-privileged identities to better their lives and be that example.

The one identity that give me the least power is my religion. Ultimately my religion isn't

something I represent daily. I could relate to individuals who believe in God, but I could never

perceive or judge an individual based or their beliefs. Often, it’s hard for me to tell the religion of

another individual without them telling me or me asking. We can’t really identity who is Catholic,

Christian, Muslim etc. Sometimes, I feel like it’s hard to have that conversation although I myself

am open to other religious beliefs.

Understanding the importance of being educated on diversity topics, has only reassured me

why Higher Education Professionals like myself should be educated on such topics of race,

ethnicity, religion, gender, sexual orientation and social class. A lot of my bias on different

cultures we're cleared throughout this course. It is not only important to fit into the culture of any

given university but provide a welcoming environment where individuals feel welcome and safe.

Higher Education is filled with a million different walks of life. In which the importance of

diversity is always important to understand different populations of students/staff. After this

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course, I will integrate the importance of my culture with the level of rapport I build with

students/staff. Being able to construct that level of rapport with any given persona we must always

think of the reason behind our actions. Thus, these related issues demand the dignity and rights of

others, we must think of what is best for the individual. We take into account the rapport that is

built with honesty, consideration, and fairness as we help the individual. When working with

diverse groups sometimes one’s work ethic or protocol of what we signify can be questioned. But,

one must understand what signify and the purpose behind of our work.
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References

Baltazar, T., & Coffen, R. (2011). The Role of Doubt in Religious Identity Development and

Psychological Maturity. Journal Of Research On Christian Education, 20(2), 182-194.

Buchardt, M. (2013). Pedagogical Transformations of "Religion" into "Culture" in Danish State

Mass Schooling from the 1900s to the 1930s. Paedagogica Historica: International

Journal Of The History Of Education, 49(1), 126-138.

Case, K., & Stewart, B. (2010). Heterosexual Privilege Awareness, Prejudice, and Support of Gay

Marriage among Diversity Course Students. College Teaching, 58(1), 3-7.

Gardner, S. (2015). Choice theory: gender roles and identity. International Journal Of Choice

Theory & Reality Therapy, 35(1), 31-36.

Hays, P. A. (2001). Looking into the clinician’s mirror: cultural self-assessment. In P. A. Hays

(Eds.), Addressing cultural complexities in practice: A framework for clinicians and

counselors (pp. 41-62). Washington, DC: American Psychological Association.

Hoffman, R. M. (2006). Gender Self-Definition and Gender Self-Acceptance in Women:

Intersections with Feminist, Womanist, and Ethnic Identities. Journal Of Counseling &

Development, 84(3), 358-372.

Jones, A. M. (2014, December 17). 5 Ways Marginalized People Can Recognize Their Privileges

In Other Areas. Retrieved April 11, 2017, from

http://everydayfeminism.com/2014/12/the-privileged-oppressed/

Pearce, J., Down, B., & Moore, E. (2008). Social Class, Identity and the "Good" Student:

Negotiating University Culture. Australian Journal Of Education, 52(3), 257-271.

Tatum, B. D. (2003). Why are all the black kids sitting together in the cafeteria? and other

conversations about race (revised). New York: Plenum.

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Rothenberg, P. (2008). Race, class, and gender in the United States (3rd Ed.). New York, NY:

Worth Publishers.