You Permanently Gain All of The Knowledge Stored in A Book If You Eat The Entire Thing, Page by Page. What Books Do You Eat First - AskReddit

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You permanently gain all of the
3478 knowledge stored in a book if you eat
the entire thing, page by page. What Submitted on 05 Dec 2018
books do you eat first?
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[–] EcstaticStrings 5884 points 10 hours ago

Rules:
(hover for more info)
What They Teach You at Harvard Business School
and What They Don't Teach You at Harvard You must post a clear and direct question
in the title. The title may contain two,
Business School
short, necessary context sentences. No
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1
text is allowed in the textbox. Your
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[–] Tra5olo 1435 points 9 hours ago go in the comments section. more >>
Came looking for this, the true path to infinite
knowledge Any post asking for advice should be
permalink embed save parent report reply 2 generic and not specific to your situation
alone. more >>
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Askreddit is for open-ended discussion

[–] Alaishana 408 points 9 hours ago 3
questions. more >>
That's the total of human knowledge.
Well done! Posting, or seeking, any identifying
personal information, real or fake, will
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12/6/2018 You permanently gain all of the knowledge stored in a book if you eat the entire thing, page by page. What books do you eat first? : AskR…
[–] ButtholeSpiders 322 points 8 hours ago 4 result in a ban without a prior warning.
more >>
Not just human knowledge, but everything
in the universe. How does the Zorgab
Askreddit is not your soapbox, personal
species on planet 12358W reproduce? Who 5
army, or advertising platform. more >>
knows, but it sure as hell isn’t taught at
Harvard.
Questions seeking professional advice
permalink embed save parent report reply 6 are inappropriate for this subreddit and
will be removed. more >>
[–] Mekroval 65 points 6 hours ago
Which book would cover what you learn

Soliciting money, goods, services, or
in the Harvard Business School from 7
favours is not allowed. more >>
Dimension C-137? Technically it's the
same university, but possibly a different Mods reserve the right to remove content
curriculum (taught by mutants, of or restrict users' posting privileges as
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[–] Origonn 34 points 3 hours ago
They're not mutants, they're Comment replies consisting solely of

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[–] NifflerOwl 27 points 5 hours ago
wtf that's the neighboorhood from The

Good Place Tags to use:
[Serious]
[–] Jaleou 11 points 3 hours ago
What the fork! Use a [Serious] post tag to designate

your post as a serious, on-topic-only
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reply

Filter posts by subject:
[–] Alaishana 14 points 7 hours ago
Mod posts Serious posts
Good point!
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Unfilter
[–] Moishe230 65 points 7 hours ago

Do you have ideas or feedback for
Everything They Don't Teach You at Harvard Askreddit? Submit to /r/Ideasforaskreddit.
Business School
is this like a joke or something? keep seeing it
Please use spoiler tags to hide spoilers.

[–] icorrectpettydetails 262 points 6 hours ago
>!insert spoiler here!<
There's a book called 'What They Don't
Teach You At Harvard Business School',
which is about various tips and techniques Other subreddits you might like:
for succeeding in business that that author,
Mark McCormack, learned from experience. Ask Others Self & Others
Then there's another, similarly named book
called 'What They Teach You At Harvard Find a subreddit Learn something
Business School', which is basically just a
Meta Subs What is this ___
summary of what they teach at Harvard
Business School.
AskReddit Offshoots Offers & Assistance

Ever read the reddiquette? Take a peek!
[–] velociraptorllama0 56 points 6 hours ago

css by qtx a community for 10 years
Both books exist and, by definition, hold the
whole knowledge of the universe.
MODERATORS MESSAGE THE MODERATORS
load more comments (3 replies) krispykrackers

flyryan
Ooer
[–] onlyfor2 24 points 2 hours ago canipaybycheck
They're the titles of 2 different (real) books. roastedbagel
ani625
Take the title of those books literally and
TheJackal8
assume that it accurately describes its sexrockandroll
contents. e36
IranianGenius
By eating the first book, you now have ...and 18 more »
knowledge of everything taught at Harvard,
a small subset of all the information in the < > discussions in r/AskReddit X
world. 4337 · 2942 comments

What good careers are in need of applicants
The 2nd book's title implies that it contains due to an aging work force and little
everything not found in the first book. Thus, knowledge of the need among the younger
by eating both books, you will have
knowledge of everything.
[–] MinimalCoincidence 62 points 6 hours ago
I’ve always heard that you don’t go to prestigious business schools for prestigious
education, but for prestigious connections. I think you’re supposed to wat the people at
Harvard’s business school, not the books.
[–] thatcooluncle 96 points 5 hours ago
I'll wat whatever people I want to, buddy.

[–] imissmymoldaccount 15 points 5 hours ago
To wat the people at Harvard's business school?

[–] TYBERIUS_777 25 points 5 hours ago
Looks like the didn’t teach that word at other business schools.
[–] LearnerPermit 10 points 3 hours ago
For the most part that's true. Any professor anywhere can assign the same textbook
and syllabus. Top tier schools can recruit top tier professors. Students get access to
an alumni network, and a sheet of paper that says they attended it.
Both the quality of the education and the quality of the alumni network/reputation
matter.
[–] BBuobigos 13 points 3 hours ago
This allows you 99% of the knowledge of mankind. Leaving only the ancient tome What
They At Harvard Business School left to be found
[–] AverageWhale11 2700 points 10 hours ago
Cookbooks, that way the books I eat in the future get tastier and tastier.
[–] AchromaticSky 865 points 7 hours ago
Cooking books is illegal though.

[–] TheMormocaust 141 points 5 hours ago
bravo
[–] BlueNuckdGribbleknot 48 points 5 hours ago
Not if you don't get caught

[–] ephemeraltrident 14 points 3 hours ago
This guy cooks!

[–] Taibok 22 points 1 hour ago
Bake at 450° F. Just under the legal limit.

[–] Sidesicle [score hidden] 50 minutes ago
I like to do my baking at 420, bruh

[–] superbeansimulator 96 points 5 hours ago
you gotta do the cooking by the book

[–] Hoguera 83 points 4 hours ago
BREAK IT DOWN BITCH

[–] billyjack669 43 points 3 hours ago
Let me see ya back it up!

[–] Mistah-Jay 32 points 3 hours ago
Drop that ass down low, then pick that mothafucka up!
[–] LetTheSubGetLow 8 points 1 hour ago
WHAT
[–] ghettomagicrooster 25 points 2 hours ago
Thank you for bringing this back into my life.

Link for anyone who is wondering: https://www.youtube.com/watch?
v=G5KxZ5Lc_YA
[–] LookMomIdidafunny 11 points 3 hours ago
you gotta cook the cookbook by the book

[–] Lord_ISF 9 points 4 hours ago
👏👏
[–] havron 29 points 5 hours ago
To Serve Man
[–] 47grapes 11 points 2 hours ago
Grind Encyclopedias into a seasoned salad with dictionary dip

[–] Tigahclaw 5 points 3 hours ago
I mean, assuming that eating the book is part of the concern of this question, I don’t
see why you couldn’t just eat each page broken down into something more palatable.
Still eat them one at a time but blend them or put them into a pill capsule.
And if that’s true, I wouldn’t think that eating cookbooks plain would 1) be worth it, but
2) actually come to that specific piece of knowledge
But a clever answer nonetheless
[–] ibehapa 477 points 6 hours ago
1) Download PDF of textbook

2) Print PDF onto edible paper or lasagna sheets or something
3) bone apple teeth
4) EZ degree
[–] Potikanda 100 points 2 hours ago
Upvote just for bone apple teeth.

[–] obfuscation-9029 [score hidden] 7 minutes ago
Get an incredibly high resolution printer prints the text as small as possible. Grind the
paper to dust drink the knowledge.
[–] Distance_Runner 4057 points 10 hours ago*
Step 1: Download Wikipedia

Step 2: Format all wikipedia articles into ebook
Step 3: Put ebook onto micro SD card
Step 4: Swallow Micro sd card, thus consuming the book
Step 5: ???
Step 6: Profit
[–] nemozeno 1713 points 10 hours ago
2018 and it didn't occur to me that a book can equal ebook.

Ingenius...
[–] suitology 376 points 8 hours ago
"George Washington, first president of the united states, was also heavily invested in
Cinemax entertainment"
Six foot twenty fucking killing for fun

[–] Fight_the_bastards 78 points 4 hours ago
I heard he once held his opponent’s wife’s hand...

...in a jar of acid...
...at a party.
[–] TuckerMouse 13 points 2 hours ago
brrrrrinnnng!
[–] psiphre [score hidden] 36 minutes ago
schoooooo!
[–] kjata 25 points 3 hours ago
Threw a knife into heaven and could kill with a stare.

[–] De5andy 24 points 2 hours ago
Let me play it on the line. He had two on the vine. I mean two sets of
testicles, so Divine.
[–] The_Frame 41 points 4 hours ago
Killed his sensei in a duel and never said why

[–] Mattzorry 15 points 1 hour ago
I heard, that motherfucker had like, thirty god damn dicks

[–] AlwaysLupus 16 points 1 hour ago
He'll save children but not the British children.

[–] mgraunk 15 points 1 hour ago
How this didn't make the final cut of Hamilton I'll never understand.
[–] Z0MBIE2 14 points 1 hour ago
Probably didn't occur because it's basically cheating. We all know OP meant a book,
he specifically said page by page.
[–] Cyber_Avenger 9 points 3 hours ago
There is no page......
[–] SirMonkeyFood 10 points 2 hours ago
You cant eat an ebook page by page.

[–] bluemooneyes 19 points 1 hour ago
Just byte by byte.

As clever as this is, I don't think this would work. OP stated the book must be eaten
page by page to gain knowledge. Consuming the whole book at once wouldn't work.
That's just the way I'm interpreting it though. Feel free to change my view.
[–] Distance_Runner 293 points 9 hours ago
OP didn't define parameters for font size or page size. I'll just put all of wikipedia on
one page.
Fair enough. Genius idea using an ebook.
[–] fart_shaped_box 30 points 7 hours ago
Was just about to say.. buy an e-book and shrink it down to size 1 font to
minimize the amount of pages to eat.
[–] Hornedmarten 35 points 7 hours ago
We with Wikipedia that's still probably the longest book in existence

[–] Shattered_Deluge 52 points 5 hours ago
How did we end up eating CVS receipts?

[–] Heavenlysome 5 points 5 hours ago
This needs a GIF

[–] kap_bid 3 points 1 hour ago
I dont think theres enough compression for a gif that big

[–] _phish_ 10 points 4 hours ago
You could also print on both sides of the page, that’ll cut the amount of
paper eaten in half.
[–] Zulfiqaar 4 points 3 hours ago
Then write over crisscross, and in multiple colours. Or atleast that's

what's done for exam notes
[–] Bill_D_Wall 46 points 6 hours ago
Flash memory is frequently arranged of "pages" of a couple hundred bytes or a few

kilobytes in size, so this would clearly work if you pick the right memory chip.
Checkmate atheists.
[–] MCEaglesfan 41 points 8 hours ago
Step 5 is enter into a coma and/or go absolutely batshit insane. No brain could handle
all that knowledge in a single swallow.
That’s why you have to go 1 page at a time.
[–] I_Automate 11 points 4 hours ago
I interpreted that as you don't get any of the knowledge until the book is fully
consumed, so it's a wisdom bomb either way
[–] jb20x6 38 points 10 hours ago
Ok people! We found the right answer! Shut it down.

[–] Bylahgo 27 points 8 hours ago
5 minutes earlier someone edited Wikipedia. You have all the knowledge, but none of it's
right
[–] KFY 11 points 4 hours ago
[citation needed]
[–] DontFeedMonkeys 17 points 7 hours ago
You will have an approximate knowledge of many things

[–] NickeKass 12 points 6 hours ago
Wikipedia in print form

[–] Emperor_Cartagia 20 points 4 hours ago
You just linked to an online Wikipedia article, about a print copy of Wikipedia, that is
the collected online version-
RECURSIVE ERROR
[–] BlackBox- 4 points 10 hours ago
Impressive. I was thinking re-print book in small print.
[–] TheFeatheredCock 434 points 10 hours ago
It would have to be a book to teach yourself a foreign language for me.

An English dictionary? I know enough English I don't feel that the extra words would benefit
me that much.
An encyclopedia? It would be cool to know about pretty much everything, but eating it
would be tough going and a lot of the knowledge isn't practical.
Most how to ______ books? These are better but knowing the theory is one thing, applying
it is another.
With a language book, you'll know the language. Yes there'll be a bit of time to pick up the
sound of it, but knowing what words you're listening for and what order they're likely to be
in will get you 70-80% of the way there.
[–] savageexplosive 40 points 1 hour ago
Also, you can just have an audioversion for dessert!

[–] WSp71oTXWCZZ0ZI6 [score hidden] 17 minutes ago
My first thought, too. I've been learning Korean for about 4 years now, and I will be for
the rest of my life (in fact it was in my marriage vows that I'll never stop learning).
Some parts of it are okay, but some parts of it (especially vocabulary) are really a grind.
[–] conjo434 1902 points 10 hours ago
textbooks so i can get the fuck out of this shithole called a school
[–] to_the_tenth_power 587 points 9 hours ago
Any medical costs you might incur would also only be a fraction of what you'd spend on
those fucking things anyway.
[–] LordShitqueef 346 points 9 hours ago
Eat medical texbook, problem solved

[–] Azuenz 266 points 6 hours ago
After eating this medical textbook I learned I shouldn't eat books.

[–] ELI5_Life 133 points 6 hours ago
+10 Wisdom.
[–] yoduh4077 29 points 4 hours ago
I SHOULD HAVE STUDIED

[–] KingGorilla 43 points 8 hours ago
Specifically organic chemistry

[–] EddieBravo4Prez 19 points 6 hours ago
A solid, healthy choice. Well done.

I prefer my ochem textbooks medium rare.

[–] Stupid_Comparisons 12 points 5 hours ago
I remember my textbook in school said wind was caused by good and evil forces fighting
it out. The only reason I know this is because a teacher pointed it out to us on why we
only use certain pages.
[–] jissej 7 points 2 hours ago
Wait, what?
[–] SargonTheDeadly 855 points 10 hours ago
A french to English dictionary. Got to love living in a place where you can’t get work unless
you can fluently speak two languages.
[–] Chansharp 242 points 8 hours ago
Gotta learn the grammar too

[–] Regalingual 469 points 6 hours ago
Grammar are overrated.

[–] devler 312 points 4 hours ago
Why waste time say lot word when few word do trick?
[–] mylifeisnotamovie 79 points 3 hours ago
When I president , they see

[–] WillBackUpWithSource 60 points 3 hours ago
This is actually how the girl I am dating (non-native speaker) and I text a lot
of the time.
It's just easier to use more simplified grammar.
[–] Supreme_Succ 5 points 2 hours ago
But it takes the same amount of time when you have to describe it
[–] WhiteRabbit86 13 points 2 hours ago
Am it though?
[–] IAintFromHere 14 points 4 hours ago
Mine has lessons for grammar in it.

[–] Being_a_Mitch 9 points 5 hours ago
Grammar book for dessert

I'd chow down on one of those 501 verb conjugation and grammar books, for good
measure. It's the grammar that tripped me more than the vocabulary when I had to
learn French (and which would get me in the most trouble when conversing).
[–] GoddamnSocrates 27 points 9 hours ago
Quebec?
[–] SargonTheDeadly 34 points 9 hours ago
Close, NB.
[–] AzuraHatesScamps 3 points 2 hours ago
Ah I was going to guess Ontario, nice to see its a problem everywhere else too.
/s
[–] Deroni76 43 points 6 hours ago
You might be disappointed to learn that the world champion of Scrabble in French
cannot speak it.
[–] aithusah 5 points 1 hour ago
Imagine living in Belgium where you get to learn Dutch, English and French which you'll
probably need in any high position plus people expect you to know some basic German
too. Now you wont need this in a lot of jobs but it does look good on a resume.
[–] _phish_ 10 points 4 hours ago
You forgot, you’ll need an English to French dictionary too... duh???

[–] DaveLanglinais 99 points 8 hours ago
Medical books detailing how to cure a seriously messed-up GI tract.

[–] ExoticCommunication 32 points 4 hours ago
Married to a doctor. Friend is a GI doc.

Short answer: no easy cure. I have IBS and... it's good days and bad days. Good luck to
you!
[–] Thursdaylady 10 points 1 hour ago
That's a great place to start, since you'll be messing up your GI tract by eating books.
[–] monty_kurns 192 points 8 hours ago
The Swedish Made Penis Enlarger and Me (this sort of thing is my bag, baby) by Austin
Powers.
[–] SuperDuper125 51 points 5 hours ago
I believe you mean Austin Danger Powers.

[–] bl1ndvision 339 points 10 hours ago
Dictionary
[–] to_the_tenth_power 274 points 9 hours ago
Sounds insalubrious
[–] read-it-somewhere 50 points 6 hours ago
How did it taste? Any recommendations for good tasting dictionaries? I've heard the
Oxford English dictionary uses a certain type of paper which isn't easily digestible,
so exploring my options right now. Open to new opportunities!
[–] Exploding_Antelope 47 points 7 hours ago
They died from internal paper cuts with a thorough knowledge of all words starting Aa–
Aj
[–] ralfaroni 13 points 5 hours ago
Scripps National Spelling Bee is in January so you're just in time!

[–] ViolaNguyen 44 points 6 hours ago
I'll spoil the end so you don't have to read it.

The zebra did it.
[–] robokomodos 21 points 6 hours ago
Zounds!
[–] JaeHoon_Cho 645 points 9 hours ago
1. Go to the library
2. Tear out the last few pages of every popular book
3. Consume pages
4. Go around spoiling endings
5. ???
6. Profit
[–] NetherDandelion 192 points 7 hours ago
I hate you
[–] ChaosMilkTea 178 points 3 hours ago
Be librarian
Some little shit is going around tearing out pages from random books
"Hey you! You're in a lot of trouble!"
"There's hedgehog sex at the end of That Hideous Strength!"
I can not fight a force this powerful.
[–] LordofSpheres [score hidden] 56 minutes ago
Shit, now I gotta read that.

[–] RobFart 32 points 5 hours ago
Dude if all you're consuming is the knowledge of the last few pages why not just read
them?
[–] PrincessKenni 45 points 5 hours ago
Easier to eat than read.

[–] SeikaHarp 56 points 4 hours ago

g
There was a scientist who allegedly got stabbed by his co-worker because he did exactly
this. He spoiled all the guy’s endings.
[–] 5thvoice 65 points 4 hours ago
IIRC, it was in Antarctica. The guy totally deserved it.

[–] 80000chorus 56 points 3 hours ago
Where are you going to get new reading material in Antarctica? That guy spoiled
this man's entertainment for months. He had it coming.
[–] ikindalold 9 points 1 hour ago
"What are gonna do, stab me?"

— Antarctic scientist
[–] pedre_falopa 16 points 5 hours ago
Chaotic evil
[–] Aazadan 341 points 10 hours ago
Well, since another poster covered the ebook loophole I'll go a different route and assume
you need to eat a physical book.
So, I would eat books by putting them in a blender and drinking them as a milkshake. I
figure I could probably consume one per day.
Assuming I am given perfect understanding of the contents, and not just memorization of
the words, I think I would start with books that teach various languages. After that I would
go after the worlds holy books in their native languages.
[–] jessdb19 77 points 5 hours ago
Have book converted to pdf, print it at smallest size possible, getting all pages onto one
page.
[–] canadianbacon-eh-tor [score hidden] 56 minutes ago
You're going places

[–] Xzanium 30 points 3 hours ago
What about "page by page" ?

[–] SchoolQsThrowaway 19 points 2 hours ago
Blend each page individually, make shots of book pages!

[–] poneil 16 points 3 hours ago
Yeah I imagine the "page by page" qualifier was included specifically to avoid this
kind of loophole.
[–] TheKatyisAwesome 65 points 5 hours ago
I was thinking about putting it in the blender too.

[–] II_Confused 50 points 5 hours ago
I was going to use an industrial strength shredder. The one at my work can turn a
magazine into powder in seconds.
[–] AlexandrinaIsHere 24 points 2 hours ago
Oooh- get some really strong flavored milkshake or protein shake stuff and the
powered paper might not be noticeable at all.
[–] Lunacie 29 points 3 hours ago
I mean, paper is tree cellulose and we already eat it anyways. Sawdust is used as a no-
calorie bulk to increase the size of bread, while not increasing the calories of it. Its
tasteless and insoluble fiber, and you don't really notice it until the quantities get too
large.
It would still take a while to eat a whole book anyways because drinking that much fiber
at once would probably kill you, but its not nearly as unpalateable as the eat a couch
one a few days ago.
[–] nikktheconqueerer 19 points 2 hours ago
Honestly you could manage a good 10 pages a day without worrying about any
serious medical problems. Every month, you'd finish off another college textbook,
then at the end of the year, take as many test for credit exams your college allows.
You could passively work towards an entire year of school just by eating some paper
for a few months.
Even better, just eat some Python/C#/Javascript/C++ for Dummies. Within two
months you'd have yourself a 100k job
[–] ColorsLikeSPACESHIPS 15 points 1 hour ago
For about eight seconds after reading your comment, I had my life planned out.
Then I remembered that I don't actually gain knowledge by eating books, and,
well, goddamnit Reddit, I'm such a fool to love you.
[–] chochazel 7 points 3 hours ago
So, I would eat books by putting them in a blender and drinking them as a
milkshake.
Why not start off with a book of milkshake recipes?
[–] RedKorss 95 points 10 hours ago
My textbooks.
Then the books my textbooks are based off of.
Then I'll get the textbooks for other BA's I'm looking at and eat those and the books those
are based off of.
Repeat till I get all the MA's.
Confuse a lot of people.
???
Profits
[–] southsamurai 77 points 10 hours ago
Gray's anatomy because I suck at rote memorization and hate looking up a specific piece of
anatomy when I need it.
The entire foxfire series. It's a bunch of books that cover primitive survival, camping, and
off grid skills. One of the most useful survival writings ever, but it's so damn much info that
retaining it all is difficult.
Then I'd pick the best texts on coding because my dyslexia makes it really hard to learn
anything that isn't in fairly clear fonts with words that don't fit patterns. I learned some
basic and pascal when I was younger, and I've always wanted to learn more, but it isn't
feasible for me.
Hell, if the power is infinite and retention perfect, I'd just keep going.
[–] kuzan1998 12 points 4 hours ago
Grays anatomy is big as fuck but I'd eat the whole damn thing and sabotta while I'm at
it
[–] Regalingual 38 points 6 hours ago
Can you only consume part of the book and gain the knowledge from that part?
Because I could stand to learn how to say “but I don’t wanna!” in the wordiest way possible
by just eating the centerpiece speech from Atlas Shrugged.
[–] PinkWolverine 39 points 5 hours ago
LOOP HOLE: Download the ebook, print it in the tinniest font possible onto the thinnest
paper you can find and eat.
To facilitate the eating I would boil or blend the book and I would drink it rather than eating
it.
And... I would start with The Count of Monte Cristo.
[–] DreadWulfie 40 points 4 hours ago
This but just print it on rice paper with soy ink.

[–] Granfallegiance 7 points 3 hours ago
And put it in a Monte Cristo.

[–] haeofael 60 points 10 hours ago
Encyclopædia Britannica. Every volume. That much fibre has got to be good for you.
[–] ChronoKing 52 points 6 hours ago
And if it isn't good for you, you'll know by the time you're done.
[–] Shangtia 80 points 5 hours ago
Download all Rosetta Stones in PDF format as well as medical school text books.
Shrink text, screen shot, shrink screen shot, repeat until it all fits on 1 page.
Print it out, bind it into a book.
Eat the 1 page book.
[–] Yorikor 19 points 2 hours ago
Can't print that small, sorry. Essentially you'll just eat a page with blurry printer ink.
[–] Rebornhunter 8 points 2 hours ago
You're the kinda guy who wishes for infinite wishes aren't you?
[–] Iracundiae 44 points 10 hours ago
A psychology book, a book on programing languages, a detailed book on the human biology,
a book on how to build a transmission and a dictionary.
[–] Angylika 20 points 10 hours ago
If it had to be physical paper books, like someone else said, a cookbook. But, shredded.
Like, 4way shredded so it's like confetti. Then go onto language books, but they'd be
worked into good meals. Then the sky is the limit!
[–] sarusongbird 19 points 6 hours ago
Anything of decent size in an untranslatable language. Write it back out, and hand it off to
the linguists.
[–] NarcolepticTeen 9 points 5 hours ago
Get your Nobel Prize, too.

[–] PsychDiamond 81 points 10 hours ago
The uni book i gotta know for my final 🤦♀

[–] ThatBoredBro 15 points 9 hours ago
But then you would have to pay for the replacement

[–] Davcb94 70 points 7 hours ago
cheaper to replace the book than to retake the class.

Bill Bryson's "A Short History of Nearly Everything."

Also, if fictional digital books are allowed, then I'd eat the intergalactic edition of the
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.
[–] NarcolepticTeen 17 points 5 hours ago*
War and Peace, to sound impressive.

Ulysses, so I'd actually understand it.
After eating all that, maybe I'd have Green Eggs and Ham for desert, since it is supposedly
tasty.
Edit: a word
[–] GlaciumFracture 14 points 5 hours ago
"why are you eating a law book?"

"because I want to learn how to screw people over without it being illegal."
[–] Ascential 21 points 7 hours ago
I would custom order tiny font books and start with the eating sciences, move into the
social sciences then world religions. Mix in a few language books here and there to keep it
well balanced as well.
[–] LawnShipper 46 points 10 hours ago
sex position books

[–] flipping_birds 58 points 9 hours ago
Bad move. Tip, there are only a few good ones and whole lot of crappy ones. Stay away
from kama sutra.
[–] Alaishana 38 points 9 hours ago
Maybe 10 viable positions that actually make sense.

Rest is for show and fun.
[–] ZombiePope 16 points 6 hours ago
Are there sex positions that aren't for fun?

[–] ninjask92 20 points 5 hours ago
Missionary for the sole purpose of procreation.

[–] HRBP 16 points 5 hours ago
You sick fuck

[–] sir_whirly 16 points 4 hours ago
I don't know, might be the freak in me, but gazing placidly at my

partner as we pump one out for the soon-to-be grandparents is crazy
good.
[–] ilikeike99 10 points 3 hours ago
What
[–] JusHerForTheComments 10 points 2 hours ago
He doesn't know, might be the freak in

him, but gazing placidly at his partner as
they pump one out for the soon-to-be
grandparents is crazy good.
[–] Ambergregious 17 points 5 hours ago
What if I told you you could eat your book one page at a time, and absorb the knowledge,
with your eyes.
[–] Xzanium 7 points 3 hours ago
This one's an eidetic.

[–] yourlocalstrangler 9 points 4 hours ago
Fucking dictionary
[–] TheF0CTOR 12 points 4 hours ago
you mean the kamasutra?

[–] yourlocalstrangler 9 points 4 hours ago

Lol no I actually meant a dictionary. But that works also

[–] mr_orlo 20 points 10 hours ago
Dictionary, everything else is just a remix

[–] Ringoworms 20 points 10 hours ago
Everybody Poops
[–] Optic-Rock 5 points 1 hour ago
Spoiler Alert: Everybody Poops

[–] kenerd24601 8 points 9 hours ago
Every bad fanfiction on the planet

[–] TapDaddy24 5 points 5 hours ago
I've got a huge book on linux commands. I bet that'd be worth eating. At least a few
chapters anyways...
[–] CalumDuff [S] 10 points 5 hours ago
So apparently reading a book can help you absorb its contents? Do I have that right?
[–] ProfessorNasty 6 points 10 hours ago
101 recipies with paper.

[–] Paladin_of_Freedom 5 points 6 hours ago
That depends. Do I get magic if I eat a Harry Potter book?

[–] koka558 6 points 6 hours ago
First Aid for the USMLE Step 1

[–] TheReidman 4 points 5 hours ago
The Necronomicon
[–] moonbeanie 6 points 5 hours ago
There's this thing called reading where I can accomplish the same results without all the
indigestion.
[–] CeciNestPasUnePomme 3 points 10 hours ago
The books that I have to read for my finals.

[–] Fone_Zone 5 points 9 hours ago
Dictionaries of every spoken language.

[–] vernonmarsh 4 points 7 hours ago
Maybe Strunk and White's The Elements of Style. I'd only have to eat about 30 pages and I
then I could write real good.
[–] ICUTrollin 4 points 5 hours ago
My Thermodynamics textbook hands down

[–] oarngebean 4 points 5 hours ago
A cook book on cooking books so I can make them taste better

[–] semicartematic 4 points 5 hours ago
Dictionary so I can understand all the knowledge.

[–] sleepyjenkins18 4 points 4 hours ago
First I eat the Communist Manifesto. Then I eat the rich.

[–] JasonVoorheesthe13th 4 points 2 hours ago
Dictionary
about help apps & tools <3

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You Permanently Gain All of The Knowledge Stored in A Book If You Eat The Entire Thing, Page by Page. What Books Do You Eat First - AskReddit

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[–] EcstaticStrings 5884 points 10 hours ago

Askreddit is for open-ended discussion

Which book would cover what you learn

[–] Origonn 34 points 3 hours ago

They're not mutants, they're Comment replies consisting solely of

[–] NifflerOwl 27 points 5 hours ago

wtf that's the neighboorhood from The

What the fork! Use a [Serious] post tag to designate

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[–] Moishe230 65 points 7 hours ago

Please use spoiler tags to hide spoilers.

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[–] velociraptorllama0 56 points 6 hours ago

load more comments (3 replies) krispykrackers

world. 4337 · 2942 comments

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[–] MinimalCoincidence 62 points 6 hours ago

[–] thatcooluncle 96 points 5 hours ago

I'll wat whatever people I want to, buddy.

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[–] imissmymoldaccount 15 points 5 hours ago

To wat the people at Harvard's business school?

[–] TYBERIUS_777 25 points 5 hours ago

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[–] LearnerPermit 10 points 3 hours ago

[–] BBuobigos 13 points 3 hours ago

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[–] AverageWhale11 2700 points 10 hours ago

[–] AchromaticSky 865 points 7 hours ago

Cooking books is illegal though.

[–] TheMormocaust 141 points 5 hours ago

[–] BlueNuckdGribbleknot 48 points 5 hours ago

Not if you don't get caught

[–] ephemeraltrident 14 points 3 hours ago

This guy cooks!

[–] Taibok 22 points 1 hour ago

Bake at 450° F. Just under the legal limit.

[–] Sidesicle [score hidden] 50 minutes ago

I like to do my baking at 420, bruh

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[–] superbeansimulator 96 points 5 hours ago

you gotta do the cooking by the book

[–] Hoguera 83 points 4 hours ago

BREAK IT DOWN BITCH

[–] billyjack669 43 points 3 hours ago

Let me see ya back it up!

[–] Mistah-Jay 32 points 3 hours ago

[–] LetTheSubGetLow 8 points 1 hour ago

[–] ghettomagicrooster 25 points 2 hours ago

Thank you for bringing this back into my life.