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12/12/2018 A Toolkit for Students in Crisis | Edutopia

GEORGE LUCAS EDUCATIONAL FOUNDATION

SOCIAL AND EMOTIONAL LEARNING

A Toolkit for Students in Crisis


An elementary school assistant principal shares a few ideas
for how to help students calm down and regain self-control.

By Ryan Wheeler

March 9, 2017

© Shutterstock.com/Monkey Business Images

I’ve learned a few tricks over many years of working with emotionally reactive students—kids who feel

emotions intensely and have difficulty managing them. Each time I acquire a new skill, I put it in my

toolkit, my figurative database of different techniques to try in situations when students are in crisis.

These students do not yet possess self-regulation strategies to help themselves, so my job is helping

them out of the immediate moment. One technique does not work for every student, so I take the

pragmatic approach and just keep rolling through my toolkit of tricks until I find one that’s effective.

BE PRESENT

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Students often act out because they’re not feeling seen or heard, so if I give them my complete focus,

they’re having that need met. I get a student’s attention first by using his or her name, which

communicates that I’m there to help. Eye contact is my first tool. I know this sounds basic, but it’s

essential. I’ve found that if I focus all of my attention on the student with my eyes and convey a real

sense of empathy, it begins to build a bridge of understanding. After saying their name and catching

their eye, I engage them in some dialogue.

The first strands of conversation are not particularly of consequence as I am merely trying to get their

mind off being flooded with negative emotions. Sometimes I ask a genuine question like, “What is the

matter?” and other times I try to distract with a completely unrelated comment like, “Whoa! Is that the

Millennium Falcon outside?” I have also been known to tell a silly joke as a means of shaking a student

out of a frustrated mindset.

Saying something that has absolutely nothing to do with the present moment may also be enough to

snap them out of their troubled state. I’ve used distraction in many ways to get a student’s attention off

of whatever or whoever made them furious and bring them back to a state of rational thinking. Once, I

walked into a room where a student was holding a cadre of teachers at bay at the side of the room by

brandishing a shelf from a bookcase. After quickly surveying the scene, I just said, “Hey what is that?”

while pointing away from me. That second of distraction was enough for the student to forget what he

was doing, see my friendly face, and give me his would-be weapon, and the crisis was resolved

peacefully.

Rapport is the best remedy for any crisis situation. For this reason, I make a point of getting to know the

students with histories of being highly reactive. I like to think of this as building equity in case a need

arises. One day I was walking out to the recess field with my football and passed the PE teacher. She

politely asked what I was doing, and I replied, “I’m going to have some positive experiences with kids.”

She appreciated this response and understood immediately that my laying the groundwork with positive

interactions could pay off exponentially later on. And playing with the kids is just fun, for them and me!

USE A TACTILE APPROACH


A tactile approach can also be extremely useful. For a specific young autistic student, I bring a small

squishy soccer ball to any situation because simply handing him that ball is enough to quell his anger.

With another student I use hand squeezes that count down from five: I hold his hand in mine as he

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holds my thumbs, then count five hand squeezes, and next he squeezes my thumb five times. Then we

do four squeezes each, working our way down to one in 30 seconds or less, and the frustration abates.

These tactile techniques can give students a safe and positive way to let out their negative energy.

PRACTICE BREATHING
My favorite technique from my toolkit involves only breathing. Teaching a student how to breath

intentionally as a means of controlling emotions is one of the gifts I impart. I ask them to focus on my

eyes, and I teach hand signals to reduce verbalization and focus first on the act of breathing. The hand

signals are as follows: palms up to breathe in, palms out to hold the breath, palms down to breathe out.

We do no more than five total breaths, and the entire process takes about 40 seconds.

I like teaching this technique because it can help promote emotional self-regulation and clear thinking in

any situation. Intentional breathing can be used to alleviate test-taking anxieties, to center oneself

before giving a presentation, to find a moment of peace before moving from one thing to the next, or

just to mindfully be present in the moment.

Emergency situations can be impactful for everyone involved: the student acting out, the staff trying to

help, and any student who witnesses the action. I arrive in these instances ready to use my toolkit to

help resolve problems as quickly as possible.

Our purpose is to help our students however they need, and guiding them to get their emotions under

control can be one of the most essential lessons we teach.

FILED UNDER

Social and Emotional Learning Classroom Management K-2 Primary

3-5 Upper Elementary

G E O R G E LU C AS E D U C AT I O N A L F O U N DAT I O N

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