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WELCOME
Writers FORUM
A WORD FROM 4 HEADLINES 31 INSPIRATION
Newsfront The latest in Ideas Store Paula Williams
THE EDITOR the world of writing shares some happy accidents
6 AUTHOR INTERVIEW 32 TRAVEL WRITING
A
From blog to Planning: home and
new travel-writing series book deal Glenda away In the first of a new
begins this month as Young tells Douglas series for the occasional travel
freelance Solanage Hando McPherson how her road to writer, Solange Hando looks
gives tips for those wanting success began in Wetherfield at essential preparations
8 WRITERS’ CIRCLE 34 ACHIEVEMENT CALENDAR
to sell features based on
Your letters July Plan your writing for
their occasional trips and plus First Draft the summer
holidays. Travel broadens 10 FIRST STEPS 37 STORY COMPETITION
the mind, but it’s depth that Make headlines Douglas This month’s winners
editors want, so the key is McPherson shows how to of £550 in cash prizes
launch a publicity campaign 48 FICTION WORKSHOP
to plan well but also keep
for your book Make the case
an eye out for colourful 13 TALES OF MY GURU A reader’s
events and incidents that will make your copy stand out; the One idea is enough, insists casebook-style crime
unusual details that don’t make it into guidebooks. Hugh Scott’s mystery mentor story comes under helpful
To give you a practical exercise, my flash competition task 14 NOVEL WRITING scrutiny from fiction editor
High-speed thrillers Lorraine Mace
this month is to go on an interesting walk and write it up as
Laurence MacNaughton 50 POETRY WORKSHOP
if for a local magazine. There needs to be a theme or point champions Lester Dent’s Higher consciousness
to the piece so that it becomes a step-by-step story not an four-part Master Plot Poetry editor Sue Butler
aimless ramble. Do that, and you’ll also be helping to keep 17 AGONY AUNT suggests some new
yourself fit as a writer – a topic that Kath Kilburn covers in Dear Della Writer Della viewpoints for your writing
Galton answers your queries plus Experiment
her freelancing column on page 27. Bon voyage!
18 CHILDREN’S BOOKS 52 POETRY COMPETITION
Write soon, Carl Incremental This month’s winner of £100
journey Sara Grant and a dictionary
tells Anita Loughrey 54 WRITERS’ DIRECTORY
Don’t miss issue #202 on sale from 12 July her methodical approach to This month’s events, writing
developing a successful series courses and helpful books
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Writers’FORUM #201 3
newsFRONT
HEADLINES
The latest in the world of books, the internet and publishing – written by you
Quick Reads saved

£24k salary for authors at new publishing house
’’ Novelist Jo Jo Moyles has
stepped in to save an adult
literacy scheme. The Quick Reads ’frustrated
’Hedge-fund manager and author Jonathon De Montfort (right) is so
with traditional publishing that he’s set up a new company,
scheme, run by The Reading DML, that will pay new authors a £24,000 salary while they train. Calling
Agency, commissions well-known the traditional model a ‘literary lottery’, De Montfort said: ‘Imagine if
authors to write short novels. Google operated that way; it said, “Come up with random ideas or what
Moyles herself contributed a you think we want; we’re not going to tell you what we want. That is an
short story in 2015. absolutely insane way to do business, in my view.’ DML is initially offering up to 10 places to successful
As we reported last month, applicants, which it says it expects to increase up to 100 over the years. Candidates will have to pass
the project closed after losing a selection process, including psychometric tests to see if they are cut out for writing. As well as the
sponsorship. Chocolate company salary, successful author-employees will receive 50 per cent of profits plus mentoring and teaching.
Galaxy sponsored the project The Society of Authors has reservations. DML wants joint copyright for ideas as well as finished work,
from 2010 to 2016. After this, and asks that authors wait two years before moving to other publishers if they leave, although this is
private donors and publishers similar to conditions imposed on employees in other industries. Chief executive Nicola Solomon said:
kept it going. Jo Jo Moyles, the ‘A salary of £24,000 is more than the advances many would receive in traditional publishing. However,
bestselling author of Me Before we always advise writers to look a gift horse in the mouth and this one has some rotten teeth.’
You, has agreed to fund the
£360,00 budget for three years.
Chief executive of The Reading US author fails to ban collection of stories by various working to have the original
Agency, Sue Wilkinson said: ‘We ‘cocky’ book authors, Cocktales, which had trademark overturned.
couldn’t be more thankful to Jo been written in protest.
for recognising the importance
of the scheme, and so generously ’that’Wean American
also reported last month
romance
Hopkins’s lawsuit has now
been thrown out by a New
providing the funding to enable it author had trademarked the York judge, who described No laughing matter
to continue.’ word ‘cocky’ and told other the trademark as ‘weak’ and
The Quick Reads novels are
sold for a £1 and can be found
romance writers to stop using
it in the titles of their books.
described romance readers as
‘sophisticated purchasers’ unlikely ’Everyman
’The judges of the Bollinger
Wodehouse prize for
in hospitals, prisons and adult Faleena Hopkins then applied to be confused between different comic fiction have decided to
learning centres. to the courts for an injunction authors’ books. A lawyer and withhold the award this year after
Sharon Boothroyd to prevent the publication of a the US Authors Guild are still none of the 62 novels submitted
were deemed funny enough.
Judge David Campbell, the
New mentoring service launched publisher of Everyman’s Library,
said: ‘Despite the submitted
’mentoring
’Distance-learning provider The Writers Bureau has launched a one-to-one
service for writers. Aimed at those who have already invested time
books producing many a wry
smile amongst the panel during
and commitment to their writing, rather than absolute beginners, the programme the judging process, we did
offers flexible support over six to nine months, helping writers to establish good not feel than any of the books
working practices, develop their voice and take things to the next level. Guidance we read this year incited the
includes face-to-face sessions, in person or via video, and written comments. level of unanimous laughter we
The principal of the Writers Bureau, Susie Busby (right) said: ‘Joining a have come to expect. We look
mentoring programme is a great way for writers to develop and find new ways of approaching their forward to awarding a larger
craft and arranging a mentor through us means that writers can be assured of working with an rollover prize next year to a
established author with teaching or mentoring experience.’ hilariously funny book.’
The programme is suitable for those who are already working on a writing project such as a book. Previous winners of the prize –
This can be fiction, non-fiction, poetry or short stories, or another type of writing project. With a pool which launched in 2000 in tribute
of writers to draw from, The Writers Bureau say they are confident they can match applicants with a to PG Wodehouse – include
mentor who is experienced in the genre the applicant wants to work in. There is an application process Bridget Fielding, Alexander
and not everybody will be accepted on to the programme. For more information contact Susie Busby McCall Smith, Howard Jacobson,
on 0161 819 9922, email susanm@writersbureau or visit www.writers121.com Marina Lewycka and Ian McEwan.
Amanda Quinn
4 Writers’FORUM #201
Romance novels wanted

Flash festival moves to Bristol
’ The E-harmony dating website
has launched a free competition
to find a new romance novelist. ’dedicated
What’s believed to be the world’s only festival
to flash fiction takes place in Bristol in July,
The prize is a publishing with a roster of renowned flash fiction authors.
contract with Trapeze books, The Flash Fiction Festival will take place at Trinity
with an additional three hours College, Bristol (right), on 20-22 July, with readings,
of mentoring from author Anna talks and workshops by flash fiction authors from the
Stuart. The competition will be UK, USA, Ireland and Germany. They include David
judged by agents and editors Gaffney, Meg Pokrass and Nuala O’Connor, Carrie
from C+W agency, plus agents Etter, Vanessa Gebbie, Nancy Stohlman and Laurie
and editors from Trapeze books, Stone. There will be a chance to take part in writing
representatives from E-harmony competitions, buy signed books from authors and
and journalist and editor Sarah hear them reading their work in open-mic slots.
Shaffi. Festival Director Jude Higgins said: ‘Following the success of the inaugural festival in Bath last year,
Judge Sam Eades from Trapeze we knew we had to do it again. The Festival is for beginning and experienced writers who want to learn
books said: ‘I’m looking for a more about flash fiction – we have some of the best flash fiction writers out there coming to the festival
timeless tale that will appeal to so it is a great chance for people to immerse themselves in writing, reading and listening to flash fiction
the widest possible audience.’ throughout the weekend. All sections of the community, from all corners of the globe, are welcome.’
The submission window closes For more information, tickets and a programme, visit www.flashfictionfestival.com
on 30 July. The competition
requires 5000 words of a novel,
a 500 word synopsis and a brief 20 years’ experience in a variety experience and expertise, but Petit for Mama Amazonica
bio. A shortlist will be drawn up of institutions in the university also as a passionate advocate for (Bloodaxe Books). The book
in October 2018 and the winner sector, most recently at Teesside the values of the profession and explores Petit’s obsession with
announced in November. For University. She takes up her new the vital importance of libraries the Amazon rainforest as well as
more information, visit www. role in September. to society as a whole.’ her experiences in caring for her
eharmony.co.uk Jolly said: ‘I’m looking forward mentally ill mother.
to collaborating with colleagues Ondaatje prize judge and
and partners in the development writer Eva Hoffman described
of our national library in a digital Poet wins RSL Ondaatje the collection as, “a feat of
New chief librarian age and in delivering the Library’s Prize for first time imaginative intensity,” and said
for British Library ambition to be the most open, that “the Amazon rainforest
creative and innovative institution
’theARoyal
poetry collection has won comes vividly alive” in the poems.
’ The British Library has

announced Liz Jolly as its new
of its kind in the world.’
British Library chief executive
Society of Literature
Ondaatje Prize for the first
Petit has been shortlisted for
the TS Eliot Prize four times.
Chief Librarian, succeeding Roly Keating said: ‘Liz is known time. The £10,000 award for Mama Amazonica is her seventh
Caroline Brazier in the role. Liz across the sector not just for a book evoking the spirit of a collection.
brings to the Library more than her wealth of hands-on library place was awarded to Pascale Amanda Quinn
ps
and flash com
y, poetry
ODD SPOT BY HUGH SCOTT

mous stor
world-fa
Hugh Scott is a Whitbread-winning author. He writes and illustrates for The Park Free Press
0 in our
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Items should be under 200 words – the snappier the better.
You can attach a good quality photo and please make sure stories
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Derek’s creative urge was interrupted when he entertain writers in other regions. Get writing and good luck!
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HOW I WRITE
From BLOG
to BOOK DEAL
Glenda Young tells Douglas McPherson how she
went from Coronation Street blogger to saga writer
via a weekly soap in People’s Friend
T
elevision may be a distraction for five years? It was a fantastic opportunity. I
some writers, but Glenda Young’s worked with ITV and the show’s archivist,
love of Coronation Street led to a and two years later they asked me to
writing career that has blossomed update it for yet another edition.
into a three-book deal with Headline. ‘Then, when Anne Kirkbride who played
‘I’ve always written,’ says Glenda, who Deirdre Barlow died in 2015, ITV asked
grew up in the north-eastern coastal me to write a tribute book to the character,
village of Ryhope, near Sunderland. ‘As a called Deirdre: a Life on Coronation Street.
child, I wrote stories, poems and songs. I That was a real honour.’
just lost myself in words.’ Another commission came in the form
Like many, Glenda found that when she of an official Coronation Street colouring
left school and started work, the time she book, to capitalise on the adult colouring
could devote to writing diminished. craze. ‘I had to choose all the pictures,
‘You lose the inclination and start representing the show from the 1960s up
thinking that writing is something you to 2016, and write a description of each
used to do,’ she reflects. ‘Every now and picture.’ never forget that feeling – and it’s never
then, something would inspire me to write Working on the Corrie books reignited diminished. I’ve had 60 stories published
a story and I’d think, it’s still in me – it’s Glenda’s long dormant desire to write over the last couple of years and you never
something I’ll have to get out at some stories of her own. lose that feeling.’
point. But I went through my life and ‘The Deirdre book was a joy to do, but it The first story Glenda sold drew on the
didn’t have the opportunity.’ was hard work and I thought, I’m putting old adage of ‘write what you know’.
That changed in 1993, when Glenda all this effort into something for ITV. What ‘I collect sea glass, which gets washed
became an early adopter of the internet. if I did all this for myself? That’s when up on the beach where I live, so I wrote a
‘This was before Google, in the days I decided to try writing short stories for story about a man and woman who meet
when people communicated on bulletin women’s magazines.’ on the beach, fighting over a piece of red
boards and an old-fashioned thing called Glenda signed up for a creative writing sea glass – the rarest kind.
Usernet,’ she remembers. ‘The first two class at Sunderland Women’s Centre but ‘They end up getting married and the
words I typed into the internet were says she learned the most from Writers’ closing scene of the story is their ruby
Coronation Street, and I connected with Forum columnist Della Galton’s book, How wedding anniversary, when out comes
a group of fans in the UK and Canada. to Write and Sell Short Stories, based on a that first piece of sea glass, which the
‘The Canadians got the show a few column she wrote for the magazine. wife had thought was lost years ago but
weeks behind the UK, so I said, “Would ‘I can’t recommend it enough,’ Glenda which the husband has had made into a
it be interesting for you if I gave you enthuses. ‘I took Della’s advice word for necklace for her.’
a summary once a week of what’s word. I did everything she told me to do. After selling several stories to People’s
happening over here?” They said yes and If she said put the book down and do an Friend, Glenda received an unexpected
I thought, brilliant, I’m going to be doing exercise, I did it. email from the magazine. They’d heard
some writing.’ ‘One of the first things she suggested about her work on the Coronation Street
Glenda’s summaries eventually became was to go out and buy the women’s Blog, and invited her to write a weekly
the Coronation Street Blog, which is still magazines and read them, and that was soap for the mag.
thriving, with a team of contributors and the most important thing for me. It made ‘I was absolutely gobsmacked,’ says
half a million readers. Her knowledge of me aware that I wasn’t just writing for the the author. ‘I was a little apprehensive,
the soap also caught the eye of insiders. sake of it, I was writing for a market.’ because it was a huge commitment – a
Photo Emily Pentland
‘Out of the blue I got an email from a The advice had clearly paid off when 1000-word instalment every week – but
publisher to say they were updating an the first story Glenda submitted to People’s then I thought, I could have so much fun
official ITV book called The Coronation Friend was accepted. with this.
Street Saga – would I like to update it with ‘I nearly fell off my chair!’ she exclaims. ‘I’ve been doing it for two years now,’
the most important storylines of the past ‘I was dancing around the house. You she adds, ‘and it’s still the highlight of my
than to write. It’s come to me later in

life – but it’s come to me and that’s the
important thing.’
Glenda is currently writing the second
book in the series, which is set in Ryhope
in the same period but features a different
heroine, although Meg will make a cameo
appearance. She writes three or four days
a week, starting at 7.30 or 8am, often taking
a break for a bike ride mid-morning.
‘I try to write at least 2000 words a day.
Then, in the afternoon, I tend to do some
admin or blogging.
‘I do try to plan, but the plan isn’t set
in stone and can be changed as I go. It’s
a framework that I then weave the story
around.
‘What I do like to do is take a sheet of
paper for every chapter and write down
three things that I want to happen in that
Glenda in her
chapter to move the story along. As I’m
native Ryhope writing, those three things might turn
into six things or one thing, but I need
something on each page to aim for.’
chunk, and another, until I’ve got 100,000?’ As for how she creates characters: ‘I
Belle of the Back Streets, which will be have them in my head. I can see them and
I was apprehensive, published in November, is set in the former what they might wear. But then, when
but then I thought, I mining town where Glenda grew up. I’m doing my research, I’ll see pictures in
‘By that time, the pit was long gone, but books and think, that’s perfect, that’s my
could have so much I lived on an estate next to where it had lead character. So I’ll pin a photocopy up
been and I remember seeing the slag heap, on the noticeboard above my desk with all
fun with this this horrible heap of stones, coal and my maps and things. Those faces smiling
muck that I’d walk past twice a day on down at me while I’m typing are my
writing week. Every Wednesday, it’s like my way to school and back. inspiration for my characters.’
putting on a comfy pair of slippers and ‘I don’t think you appreciate history Asked for her best advice for anyone
going, Ah, I’m going to do my Riverside until you get a bit older, but now I realise who wants to write for women’s weeklies,
this afternoon!’ how important Ryhope was in the whole Glenda says without hesitation: ‘One, buy
The ongoing story is set on the site of an north-east culture of pits and coalmines. Della’s book! Two, know the market. Don’t
old shipyard, which has been pulled down It’s always been in me that I lived in a even start writing until you know who
to make way for a modern apartment small village where everyone knew each you’re writing for.
complex. other, with all this history and heritage, ‘Read the magazines and read the
‘In my head it’s in Sunderland, but it and stories to tell.’ adverts. See who each magazine is
could be any ex-industrial land,’ Glenda Her novel is set just after the First World marketing itself to. Read the guidelines
explains. ‘We’ve got all the soap staples in War and revolves around Meg, who takes too, because there’s no point sending a
there: some very strong women and some over her father’s rag and bone cart after 1500-word story to a magazine that uses
comedy men, and a pub and a deli where his death. only 1000 words or 2000 words.’
they all meet.’ ‘I sent the book to some agents and Her final tip: ‘Don’t just write one story,
The thrill of seeing her words in print Caroline Sheldon said she absolutely loved because if it comes back that’s a 100 per
every week gave the author the confidence it. Again, it was one of those falling-off-my- cent rejection. One thing Della is really
to begin the novel she’d always dreamed chair moments, because you write these strong on, and which I took to heart, is
of writing. things and never know if they’re going that while you’re waiting for a reply, write
‘Writing short stories was a fantastic to go anywhere, but we ended up with more stories. If you send out 10 and one
rehearsal,’ she says. ‘I was already in the three publishers fighting over it and got a gets rejected, then you’ve still got hope
mindset of sitting down and writing in three-book deal with Headline. for the other nine.’
2000-word chunks, so I thought, what if ‘It’s an absolute dream come true,
I just keep writing another 2000-word because I’ve never wanted anything other • See www.glendayoungbooks.com
READER LETTERS
Writers CIRCLE
Your news and views, writing tips and funny stories
STIR UP SUCCESS CHILDREN’S BOOKS
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surprised when I was asked to
write a recipe book to sell in aid WRITE SOMETHING MEANINGFUL Ruby Lovell explains how with
children’s author
of the village gardening group. personal experience showed her the importance of diversity in children’s fiction Anita Loughrey
Recipes arrived from far and

I
was born in Sri Lanka and have always been passionate would really like to encourage
wide, mostly traditional and easy grew up between Colombo

and Russia for much of my
Ruby with her
sons in Colombo
about redressing that balance. I
wanted to see more children of
everyone in publishing to take
responsibility for increasing
diversity in books appearing
early childhood. My father colour in children’s literature,
to follow. was a diplomat and we moved

between the two countries a
but the idea of writing my own
books didn’t come until I had
today, because I know and
have witnessed first hand that
lot, spending summers with the children of my own. there is a huge appetite for it.
It was quite expensive to have grandparents in Colombo.
Experiencing such different Inspiration
At the moment, I am writing
the next books in the Ruby
cultures at a young age like My boys’ father is English, series, Stop that Monkey! He
the book printed but, when that definitely gave me an
appreciation for what makes
from Yorkshire, and the
children grew up in London,
Stole Ruby’s Ice Lolly!; Ruby
Goes Looking for Mangoes and
people different, but, more so they had never been to Help! There’s a Gecko in Ruby’s
the day of the fair arrived, I just so, what makes cultures and
people exactly the same.
Mummy’s homeland and
experienced all the wonderful
Soup, which should be out later
in 2018 and 2019.
couldn’t believe the queue of One very formative part of

my childhood was the bedtime
stories my grandmother would
things I did as a child. Taking
my sons on their first trip to
Sri Lanka, and them absolutely
Universal advice
My tip on writing for children
people lined up to purchase it. I make up for us each night. She

was hugely passionate about
teaching us about our cultural
loving it, was the most
powerful inspiration to write
my debut picture book, Ruby
is to run your book past real
children before you send it out
to agents. See their reactions,
had a bestseller! heritage through simple

stories, drawing from things
Rides an Elephant. I wrote for
my children, most definitely,
learn which jokes soar and
which fall flat. Children are
that happened to us during but all other children of colour wonderfully honest critics.
Writing a recipe book is fun. the day. For example, a trip to

the market would turn into a
looking to have their stories
represented. about physical ability, sexual form friendships with children
Don’t just rely on your own
kids, either. See if you can go
wonderful bedtime adventure My boys provided a more orientation etc. of various backgrounds and into a local primary school
It unites people and can help a for me and my siblings, not
only to enjoy but to learn from.
direct inspiration too. The
adventures that the titular
In books for children you
find a lot of characters are
this is healthy, as when they
become adults this helps them
and do a reading of your final
manuscript, ideally with some
character Ruby gets up to anthropomorphised – animals become accepting of a world illustrations if you can. The
charity. Writers should have a go! Culture shock
I moved to London when I
are all based on real-life
experiences they had during
that act like humans, for
instance – so they appeal to as
filled with so many different
cultures, religions and customs.
feedback and reaction you
receive will shape your writing
Mavis Raper,
was about seven years old, and their first trip. We visited an many people as possible. But I I would like to see more like nothing else.
the culture shock was quite elephant orphanage where they want to see books with people books featuring mixed-race My writing and the books
something. I spoke very little saw how injured elephants are of colour on the cover, people characters of all combinations I create for children all come
Spittal, Nthmb English and my schoolmates

had never met anyone from
Sri Lanka so didn’t really
cared for, rode tuk-tuks, they
learned to play the traditional
drums, saw snake charmers
who are differently able, a
range of genders and shapes
and sizes. Children are unique,
of backgrounds. I’d also like
to see smaller racial groups
and backgrounds feature.
from my heart. I had a huge
amount of help from my
young sons too, and writing
understand me or my culture. and much more. so let’s write books that are as For example, the Disney film something that means
It was an explosion – an was one of the first
GET NOTICED particularly keen that she – and,

later, her little brother Owen –
after reading Phil Barrington’s
interview with Sarah Painter, I
try to believe this and also learn
to be kinder to myself and accept
Hugh Scott’s Tales of my Guru would have books that reflected just had to write to you. that to be as good as I can be is
in the March issue rang many the multicultural environment in The first four paragraphs good enough.
bells with me. Being creative which they were brought up. We could have been about me. I have Denise Lovering,
is the most important thing wanted books that challenged scribbled for years; written short Llandaff, Cardiff
in writing. Naturally, market political agendas as well as gender stories and confined them to
research is essential if one wants
to be published but, within the
and other stereotypes.
We found Letterbox Library
drawers with the promise that
one day I would submit them to
CHANCE FOR PR
parameters of the publication, it books (www.letterboxlibrary. someone. I would regularly read I read in your Magazine Scene
is creativity that gets noticed. com), a mail-order bookseller set through what I had written, then that Spirit & Destiny magazine had
One other point, particularly up by two mums in 1983 that is put the stories back in the drawer been revamped and was looking
when writing for magazines, is still going strong. They specialise after deciding they just weren’t for ‘good true-life spiritual
the need to give up being the in finding books that reflect the good enough. stories, where someone has had
parent of the piece. I learned the world’s wonderful diversity. One day, like Sarah, I realised an interesting spiritual awakening’.
hard way, once it is in the post or In case you’re wondering, I that the reason I didn’t do I forwarded the article to Kim
I have pressed ‘send’, it no longer have no affiliation with them anything with my scribbling was Kimber, the editor who had been
belongs to me and I can get on whatsoever! I do, however, that I was too scared to try; working hard on preparing my
with writing the next big thing. recommend them to parents, scared to have my work out there memoir, In Light & In Shade, for
Sullatober Dalton, teachers and book lovers for everyone to see because, if it publication. Kim forwarded a
Faringdon, Oxon everywhere. I’m looking forward was rubbish, then the dream of synopsis and details of the book
to reading them if and when I writing would be lost. to the title. We were delighted
BOOK GEMS have a new generation to read to!
Lindy Gibbon, Chilton
I am delighted that Sarah has
worked through her misgivings
when Spirit & Destiny features
editor Tracie Couper asked for
I read with interest Anita Polden, Somerset and self-doubt and gone on to be more information and called me
Loughrey’s interview with the a published writer. Her advice in to discuss the story.
children’s writer Ruby Lovell
(issue #200 June). Thirty years
LIGHT SWITCH the article, ‘to accept that you
have as much right as anybody
The June edition of Spirit
& Destiny features an article,
ago, when my own Ruby was I have never felt moved to else to write’, resonated with me. Reaching for Heaven, that gives a
born, my husband and I were write to a magazine before, but It was a lightbulb moment. I will brief outline of my story and also
JUST FOR FUN
WIN A YEAR’S SUBSCRIPTION!

The writer of the prize letter each month will win
a year’s subscription to the magazine. Please make Oh dear, it looks like Frank Herbert was having
sure that you include your full name and address in a bad writing day. Can you spot the 20 errors in
your email. Write to letters@writers-forum.com this ‘first draft’ of Dune?
In the week before there departure to Arrauis, when all the

final scurrying about had reached a nearly unbearable frenzy, an
mentions that I am looking for a nothing. Then I read it again,
publisher. I am hugely thankful to trying to analyse every word. old crone came to visit the mother of the boy, paul.
Writers’ Forum and very glad that No good, it was beyond my It was a warm nights at Castle Caladan, and ancient pile of
I am a subscriber! comprehension. I went back stone that had served the Atreides family as home for twenty six
Patricia Irvine, Newton to my mentor to ask what had
generations bore that cooled-sweat feeling it acquired before a
Ferrers, Devon happened to the ending. He
wasn’t sure but waffled an answer. change in the weather.
HAPPY WRITER I then turned to my elder The old women was let in by the side door down the vaulted
brother, the font of all wisdom. passage by Pauls room and she was allowed a moment to peer in
I’m not a New York He is 86 and knows everything.
PRIZE Times bestseller, but I Unlike me, he had been educated.
at him where he lied on his bed.
LETTER feel fortunate to have I copied the email to him and By the half-light of a suspensor lamp, dimed and hanging
work available online. explained my problem. near the floor, the awakened boy could see a bulky female
I’ve published three poetry ‘It’s like this, little bro,’ he said.
shape at her door, standing one step ahead of his mother. The
books, two story collections and ‘This is Modern Writing. It is like
a novel so far and had work in Modern Art. Do you understand old woman was a which shadow – hair like matted spiderwebs,
several anthologies. This year I Modern Art? No, of course, hooded around darkness of features, eyes like glittering jewel.
had a poem on display in Newark you don’t. Because you are not ‘Is he not small for his age, Jessica’ the old woman asked.
Castle as part of a poetry event. supposed to. This is what editors
My work colleagues are pleased want, same as art galleries.
Her voice wheezed and twanged like an untuned baliset.
for me, though some imagine They want stuff that nobody Paul’s mother answers in her soft contralto: ‘The Atreides
I’m on the path to becoming a understands. are known to start late getting their growth, Your Reverance.’
billionaire. I like to think of myself ‘This is what makes Great Art ‘So I’ve heard, so I’ve heard,’ wheezed the old woman. ‘Yet
as rich in a spiritual sense. I’m and Great Writing. Think of In
always grateful for any extra Xanadu did Kubla Khan. Where is he’s already 15.’
money that comes in, whether it’s the ending to that? Where is the ‘Yes, Your reverence.’
rare donations on Vocal.Media, sense? Take my advice – write ‘He’s awake and listening us to,’ said the old woman. ‘Sly
royalties from published work or rubbish without an ending.’
little rascal.’ She chuckled. ‘But royalty has need of slyness. And
bi‑annual ALCS statements. Well, there you are. Words of
The biggest reward doesn’t great wisdom from the font itself. if he’s really the Kwisatz Haderach… well…
come from being published or the Cedric de la Nougerede, Within the shadows of his bed, Paul held his eyes to mere
money made, it’s from the sense Horsham, W Sussex slits. Two bird-bright ovals – the eyes of the old woman – seemed
of achievement and the support
to expand and glow as they starred into his.
and encouragement of loved
ones. Perhaps that’s why they
RELEASE VALVE Sent in by Tracey Glasspool, from Tiverton, Devon, who wins £25
compare me to bigger and more I’d like to give a big thank you to
successful writers out there. Barbara Dynes for her amazing first mention in the first line is misspelt! pronoun). 11 witch shadow
Chloe Gilholy, article, ‘Character versus Plot’ on Arrakis but in my 1977 edition the (spelling). 10 at his door (wrong
Banbury, Oxon (issue #199 May). It placed a stent into (spelling). Bonus: Dune is set participle). 9 dimmed and hanging
in my blocked writing artery. (missing end quote mark). 20 stared 8 he lay on his bed (wrong past
FUNNY FONT I have been obsessed by plot

to us (transposed words). 19 well…’ plural). 7 Paul’s room (apostrophe).
Reverence.’ (capital). 18 listening (hyphen). 6 The old woman (not
for a long time, not realising fifteen (number spelt out). 17 Your (missing word). 5 twenty-six
My mentor sent me an email from that it is okay to concentrate on Reverence (spelling). 16 already night (not plural). 4 and the ancient
one budding writer under his characters to kickstart a story answered (past tense). 15 Your boy, Paul. (capital letter). 3 a warm
wing. It contained a short story instead. I have always had strong Jessica?’ (question). 14 mother 1 their departure (spelling). 2 the
that a magazine had accepted for characters that are constantly (spelling). 12 jewels.(plural). 13 age, Corrections
publication. I was excited as this telling me: ‘Come on, get on with
£25
was a definite example of ‘how it, we are waiting.’ Could you ruin a passage from a modern novel? Send your
to’. I eagerly read it to the end. So watch this space – I’m off! error-ridden First Draft (around 250 words), and the 20
‘What happened?’ I asked Graham Cowley, solutions, to firstdraft@writers-forum.com Please note that entries
myself. I read it again, slowly. Still Sutton Coldfield, W Mids are accepted via email only. We pay £25 for the best published.
FIRST STEPS
GET STARTED
Make headlines
Douglas McPherson shows you how to launch
your own publicity campaign
not interested in your literary

merits. Winning an award is
simply a piece of news worth
reporting.
Other news angles will tend

to be more about you than your
book.
■■ If you first publish at a

particularly young or old age,
that’s a story.
■■ Your gender could be the
story if, say, you’re a burly
male builder who writes fluffy
romances.
■■ It could be your job: Lawyer
writes crime books or Brain
surgeon writes about affairs of the
heart.
■■ Non-fiction is often
promoted on an anniversary:
New biography of the man
who invented the circus marks
250 years of the big top.
W
hat do so yours isn’t going to get not about the quality of your The point is to identify your
traditional much individual attention. book. A news feature or author story and break it down into
publishing and Only a lucky minority of interview is not a review, so a snappy headline that you
self‑publishing big-name authors are likely there’s no need or indeed point can put in the subject box of
have in common? Whichever to be afforded the services of in sending out review copies your email and the first line of
path you take, the job of an outside PR company – and to anyone other than literary your press release. That way,
publicising your book will even that ‘big push’ will be editors and book critics. the editor or journalist who
largely come down to you. limited to a few weeks around All news and features receives it will know instantly
A publisher may have an the launch of a book. journalists are interested in is why you are worth coverage.
in-house publicist, but in As an author, however, you the story behind your book.
a smaller house they may can devote as much time as What makes you and your Local hero
be doubling up in another you like to promoting your book newsworthy? Local newspapers are the place
role such as sales manager, book over a period of months to hone your skills at getting
and more concerned with and years, and accrue a large ■■ If your self-published book coverage elsewhere, because
getting a book into shops than pile of press clippings on a becomes a bestseller, that’s a they’re the easiest to get into.
marketing it to newspapers. small but regular basis. story. Not because it’s a good or To them, you have a built-in
Even the dedicated in-house bad book, but because people newsworthiness: you’re local –
publicist at a larger publisher News story like reading success stories. it’s their job to cover you!
may have one or more new The key to getting media ■■ If you win an award, that’s Be sure to play the local
books to promote every week, exposure is to remember it’s a story. Again, the journalist is author card as your opening
Play the local author card as your TAKE THE STEP

opening gambit, but don’t neglect Lesson 1
your other news angles too Whether you’re
traditionally or self-
published, the task of
publicising your book
gambit, but don’t neglect your media in places associated with headline and first paragraph,
will largely fall to you.
other news angles, as above. your book or where you’ve and use the rest to expand on
Showing them it’s a good story previously lived. the story. Lesson 2
could be the difference between A book set in Edinburgh is Write in the third person
a few column inches and a local news in that city even if and keep the tone factual The media isn’t
full-page interview or even a you live in Cardiff. You can still and journalistic, rather than interested in the
double-page spread. be ‘an author who grew up in gushing about your book, but quality of your book,
The good thing about local Carlisle’ even if you currently include a couple of short quotes just the story behind
media is that there’s often quite reside in Brighton. from yourself as author so it it. To get coverage
a lot of it. Your neighbourhood will look like the newspaper you’ll have to approach
may have weekly paid-for Press release has interviewed you. newspapers and
and free papers. There could The way to approach Put your book title, price magazines with a
be a regional daily paper newspapers is with a press and publisher at the bottom.
newsy hook – ideally
and a glossy monthly county release, so write ‘Press Release’ Below that, write something
one you can boil down
magazine. Your nearest city at the top of your email, with like ‘Notes to editor’, before
may have an evening paper. your headline beneath it. adding your phone number to a snappy headline.
Approach all of them, plus A big paper might assign and the fact that you’re
Lesson 3
your local BBC radio and a reporter to interview you, available for interview should
commercial, community and but many local papers are very they wish to call you. The best press release
even hospital radio stations. short staffed. Either way, the is a ready-to-use
Target radio by phoning best way to get coverage is to Photo article that an editor
the station and asking if they present your press release as a The most important part of can cut and paste
have a particular programme ready-to-use article that they any press release is a good into their pages and
that has authors as guests, and can simply cut and paste into photo. When did you ever see website without
get the email address of that their pages and website. more than the smallest news further work. Be sure
show’s producer. Use a similar story as your item that wasn’t illustrated?
to include a quality
Don’t limit ‘local’ to where guide for length and style. Local papers will often send
you live, by the way. Target the Get your news ‘hook’ into the out a photographer if they have
photo to illustrate it.
one on call, but you’re much
Homework
more assured of coverage if
What is your story?
TRICKS OF THE TRADE you send a ready-to-use words
and picture package. Write a one-sentence
Douglas shares writing tips he’s learned through experience Make sure your author headline that would
photo is sharply focused and justify a half-page
#42 Include a special offer big enough to print – a 1mb file article on you and
size or larger is a good rule of your book in your local
Newspapers and magazines love to give their readers something thumb. And because you want paper. Even if your
extra, so you can often increase the size and prominence of any it to fit the look of a newspaper book isn’t finished,
media coverage with a special offer for your book. It could add an page, go for a pic that tells a
this can be a good way
extra quarter-page to an article about you, and that extra space will story, such as you holding your
be a free advert for your book with an incentive for readers to buy book, or you holding your
of forming an ‘elevator
it there and then. If you’re traditionally published, liaise with your book in a setting relevant to the pitch’ that will help
publisher’s publicist to negotiate an offer price and a ‘Quote this story, as opposed to the sort of you sell it to agents
reference’ code that buyers can use to claim their discount. Your head and shoulders shot more and publishers.
publisher will be happy to offer a reduced price because if they’re suited to a book jacket.
posting the books out themselves they won’t have to pay wholesale With non-fiction, send a • Start Writing
and retail costs. Make things easy for the newspaper by writing your picture relevant to the subject Today by
special offer copy at the foot of your press release, with a descrip- as well as one of yourself and Douglas
tion of the book and how much readers will save. they may use both, doubling McPherson is
the size of your coverage. available as
■ If you have a question about getting started as a writer, In all cases, add a cover shot an ebook to
please email Douglas at gettingstarted@writers-forum.com of your book as they’ll often download from
use that, too. Amazon now
Open College of the Arts

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LIKELY STORIES
Tales of my GURU by Hugh Scott
This month the mystery mentor indulges in a bit of name-dropping
I
was building a wall in the garden. My advice to beginners. If Apricot Flan’s
back hurt, my fingers stung and the sun first idea is merely…
was chewing my head so that sweat ran
into my eyes – and I had just dropped a Nellie was standing in a doorway
brick on my toe.
I thought: If some ninnyhammer turns ‘… she should write that down. She will
up now to ask clod-pated questions…! immediately be finding the next idea:
‘Hello there!’ fell cheerfully from behind
me. ‘Building a wall?’ A cold breeze crept around Nellie‘s ankles.
I turned. He was carrying a tea tray
that my wife had purchased in Barcelona ‘The third idea will then appear. Apricot
and that had caused havoc at airport won’t have these ideas in her head before
metal detectors. On the tray were beer and she starts writing. The ideas appear
sandwiches. because she is writing! She only needs
‘Yes,’ I sighed, ‘I am building a wall. It one idea.’
is a base for a greenhouse, which I also I massaged the toe that the brick had
have to build – which is an enclosure for landed on.
benches that I also – ’ ‘I’ll need to get back to work,’ I said,
He leaned towards me. ‘Have some beer. ‘though I’m sick of bricks.’
And a beef sandwich.’ My Guru stood up. ‘One brick at a time,’
I was relieved at an excuse to rest, but he murmured.
not so happy with my visitor, because he I realised he was trying to tell me
was not merely a friend popping in but something. I frowned at the bricks waiting
my Guru, a sort of universal ghost with an A genius knows that to be part of my wall.
infinite capacity for beer and grub, and a
dispenser of advice to amateur writers like
a single idea is the I chose one. I regarded it patiently, then
cemented it into place. I selected another,
myself, even when we didn’t want it. foundation of a story and fell in love with its functional shape.
‘Why are you here?’ I said, massaging I cemented it into place.
my bruised toe. The day grew cooler. Each brick wore
My Guru glimmered at me. He said ‘with Apricot perched on my lap – ’ an evening shadow to keep it warm. I
cunningly, ‘Apricot Flan,’ then waited ‘What?’ cemented these well-baked friends into
while I said, ‘Who is not a pudding, but a ‘Did I say lap?’ he cried, grabbing a place, not noticing that my Guru had gone.
member of my writers’ group.’ sandwich to muzzle himself. ‘I meant Then my wife was beckoning me in
He chortled, because I always make it chair! I was perched on a chair in her to tea, and beaming, and startling me
clear that Apricot is not a pudding. He mother’s kitchen! What an excellent by saying that I had completed the wall
continued: ‘She was lamenting about sandwich your wife makes. That touch already.
having no ideas. So since you two are of mustard… And I understood, suddenly, what to say
close – ’ ‘What was I saying? Oh, yes. Apricot to Apricot Flan, to whom – I assure you – I
‘How dare you,’ I mumbled. was upset about her dearth of ideas. So am not particularly close.
‘– I thought you should explain to her she talked! Streams of invention flooding Or JK Rowling.
that she needs only one idea. Consider off her tongue!
JK Rowling and the ceaseless flow of her ‘She doesn’t lack ideas! Her problem is Use it or lose it
genius – ’ that she cannot decide which idea should A ninnyhammer is a simpleton. Here is how to
‘Good old JK,’ I said. ‘I was there, you start her story! She wants to know first use it… But first, think of your friends. Think
know, in the very room, when her initial if the idea is good, or whether somebody of your dear family. Think of the children you
success was announced.’ else has used it, or whether it will lead teach. Ho! Ho! Ho! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Haaaah!
‘So was I. But just because she has anywhere…’
produced enough books to fill a truck, My Guru wiped sweat from his brow. The early adventures
that doesn’t mean that her head rattles He glugged beer. He swallowed another of me and my Guru are
with plots and scenarios – not all the sandwich. published in a super-
time. A genius knows that a single idea He gazed at the beginnings of my brick beautiful hardback, Likely
is the foundation of a story. A boy wizard! wall. Stories, published by How
Stories
How many books has JK built on that! I glugged also. To Books for less than a
And also…’ The sun leaned down and scratched tenner – that’s the price of
A dreamy look gathered on my my forehead. five coffees. Treat yourself.
Guru’s face. ‘There I was,’ he murmured, ‘Just start,’ said my Guru. ‘That’s my
COMMERCIAL FICTION
HIGH-SPEED
THRILLERS
Laurence MacNaughton shows how to bash out
thrilling stories using a template from a past master
E
ver wish you could write a novel using this formula. After he revealed the
in just a matter of weeks… and sell content in 1936, he received 780 letters
it? Lester Dent knew how. He wrote from aspiring writers who used the
his first novel in just 13 days. Over formula to write and sell their first stories.
the course of his career he wrote nearly Here’s what was on those four typed
200 novel-length stories, mostly for the pages.
Doc Savage series. Throughout the 1930s
and 1940s, he often wrote a book a month. How the Master Plot works
He also filled the pulp fiction magazines Next, divide your story into
of the day with short stories cranked out Before plotting out a story, Dent advises, four parts
under various pen names. During the the writer should begin by brainstorming
Great Depression, while legions of writers four different types of new ideas: the This is the most important element of
were starving, he boasted that he made murder method (for mysteries), the the formula. Think of your story as being
$18,000 a year with his writing. In today’s villain’s goal, the locale and the menace. divided into four quarters. For a typical
terms, that’s more than £200,000. 6000-word story, that means four equal
How did he do it? He used a very specific ■■ Murder method Detective stories parts of 1500 words each.
formula. He called it a ‘Master Plot’. made up the bulk of pulp fiction, and Here’s what to put in each part:
most murder victims were done in by
Introducing Lester Dent’s shooting or stabbing. Dent emphasises Part One
Master Plot the importance of brainstorming new
possibilities, going so far as to suggest ■■ Introduce the hero in the very first
On the wall over his typewriter, Dent had poisonous scorpions or deadly germs. line, and immediately hit him with what
tacked up four typewritten pages, which A different method or unusual Dent called ‘a fistful of trouble’. Entice the
are now kept in a museum. Dent claimed circumstances are more likely to grab the
that he sold every single story he wrote reader’s interest.
■■ Villain’s goal Typical pulp fiction
villains are always after the same things:
jewels, sunken treasure, loot from a bank
robbery, etc. If you can have your villain
pursuing something unusual, it will help
set your story apart.
■■ Locale Dent advocates setting your
story in a place familiar to you, where you
have lived or worked. But if you want
to choose somewhere more exotic, he
recommends doing just enough research
to convince the editor that you know
the place. One trick he often used was
sprinkling the dialogue with a few words
in the local language, without explaining
their meaning.
■■ Menace Because pulp fiction plots
depend on continuous action, some
constant threat needs to hang around your
hero ‘like a black cloud’.
You don’t have to come up with new

ideas for all four elements. But you do
need at least one or two interesting things.
to corner the villain or another opponent romantic suspense to certain science fiction
in a vivid physical conflict. Again, and fantasy stories.
make this a different kind of physical It’s also not a bad way to outline a
confrontation. novella or full-length novel. Just expand
■■ End this section with a surprising plot the formula. Each part of the story
twist, which traps the hero in the worst structure corresponds to about a quarter
kind of jam. of the book.
■■ Does the story so far still have suspense? In my Dru Jasper series (It Happened One
Is the menace getting even worse? Is Doomsday, A Kiss Before Doomsday and No
everything still happening logically? Sleep Till Doomsday), the first line of every
book hints at the coming apocalypse. By
Part Four the end of the first chapter, the heroes have
been hit with ‘a fistful of trouble’, just as
■■ Shovel even more difficulties on to the Dent recommends.
hero. Bury him in troubles. Throughout the first quarter of each
■■ Go for an ‘all is lost’ moment: he is book, the heroes struggle to deal with a
held prisoner, framed for murder, his love worldwide threat. We quickly meet all of
interest is presumably dead, the villain is the other characters and wind up in an
about to kill him, etc. intense physical conflict, usually a fight or
■■ The hero uses his own skills, abilities a car chase (or both). Before too long, we
or brawn to get himself out of trouble and come to a plot twist that sends the story
defeat the villain. shooting off in an unexpected direction.
■■ Any remaining mysteries are resolved In the second quarter of the book, there
reader with a mystery, impose a dangerous during the final physical conflict. are even greater difficulties, more action,
menace, or present a problem that only the ■■ End with one last twist, perhaps a another plot twist, and so on.
hero can solve. punch line, that leaves the reader with Yet no reviewer has ever called my
■■ Show the hero trying to crack the a warm feeling. books formulaic. Dent’s Master Plot
mystery, vanquish the menace or solve ■■ One more time, review your story. becomes invisible, because it simply
the problem. Has the suspense held out all the way to makes it easier to figure out what should
■■ In the opening pages, introduce all of the end? Has everything been explained? happen when.
the other characters. Important: bring these Did it all happen logically? Is the very last The Master Plot is simple, universal,
characters on to the page already engaged line satisfying? and it works. That’s why it has survived
in action. the better part of a century.
■■ Because of the hero’s efforts, he winds The Master Plot works for By the way, one of my favourite reviews
up in a physical conflict near the end of novels, too… came from Starburst Magazine, which
this section. called my debut novel ‘a fast and fun ride
■■ Finish part one with a complete twist Although Dent’s plot formula was that keeps you entertained all the way
in the plot. Make sure it moves the story originally intended for writing pulp through its unyielding mayhem.’
forward, and gives the hero a next step to fiction, it works like gangbusters for any Unyielding mayhem. That’s a good way
pursue. action-packed story, from thrillers to to put it.
■■ Stop to review your story so far. Does it
contain suspense? Is the hero in danger? Add some unyielding mayhem
Has everything so far happened logically? to your next story
Part Two Obviously, Lester Dent’s Master Plot

isn’t suited to quiet, introspective literary
■■ Pile more difficulties on to the hero. stories. It’s meant to create almost
■■ Show the hero struggling to overcome continuous suspense and action.
these difficulties. It’s fuelled by adrenaline: chases, fights,
■■ Introduce another physical conflict near mysteries and breathless edge-of-your-
the end of this section, different from the seat tension. It works because it keeps the
last one. If the previous conflict was a fist reader hooked. You pound your hero with
fight, make this one a sword fight, or a ever greater trouble, and force him or her
chase, or something else. to battle all the way to a satisfying ending.
■■ End this section with another plot twist. The next time you sit down to outline
■■ Again, pause to evaluate your story so a story or book, try Lester Dent’s Master
far. Is it suspenseful? Is it logical? Is the Plot. There are no guarantees that you’ll
menace growing heavier? finish your novel in 13 days, but it’s worth
a shot.
Part Three
• Laurence MacNaughton is the author
■■ Heap even more grief on to the hero. of more than a dozen novels, novellas and
Show the hero continuing to fight back. short stories. Try his books free at www.
■■ The hero makes progress, and manages LaurenceMacNaughton.com
MASTER YOUR
CREATIVE
WRITING CRAFT
The Manchester
Writing School
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of the UK’s largest and most successful literary centres.
• Study on campus or from anywhere in the world
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January entry).
• Follow a specialist route in Novel, Poetry, Writing
for Children & Young Adults, or Place Writing £10k Poetry and Fiction Prizes
(Creative Non-fiction).
The Manchester Writing Competition
• Complete your own full-length manuscript with is now accepting entries for the 2018
editorial input from one of our world-leading writers. Poetry Prize and Fiction Prize. Both
prizes are open internationally and offer
• MA English Studies, short writing courses and the chance to win £10,000.
two-day Summer School also available. Find out more:
manchesterwritingcompetition.co.uk
Visit: mmu.ac.uk/english/creative-writing
Got a question – or advice for one of these readers? Email help@writers-forum.com ADVICE PAGE
Need advice on writing and publishing? Novelist

and short story writer Della Galton can help
When can I give up my day job?

Q I am a member of a poetry group and
we want to compile a book of our
favourite poems for publication. I realise
salary, or come close. Be prepared to live
on half your income for a while. If this is
impossible, don’t attempt it.
more likely to find success if you approach
a company first and ask what kind of play
they might like to perform in terms of
Shakespeare, Milton etc would be out of ■ In the beginning you will need an length, parts and style, age of performers
copyright, but what about contemporary alternative source of money for paying etc. Then you can work together on the
poets? Would we need to get permission bills etc. This could be a part-time job, development.
and how would we go about this? savings or a pension. Practicality is key when it comes to
Mary Hodges, via email ■ Work out exactly what you will need writing for the stage. So bear in mind the
to earn each month. Then work out following points:
A Yes, you’d need to get permission from

the rights holder of any poems that
are still in copyright. Copyright lasts until
exactly what you will need to sell each
month in order to achieve it. Then write
approximately double what you will need
Who? Who will be performing your
play? A school, a college, a village group
70 years after the writer’s death. You can to sell to allow for misses. You are bound of players who hire a hall? Many village
usually contact the poet (or rights holder) to have some. am-dram companies, for example, have
via the publisher; many current poets also more female actors than male, so it’s
have a social media presence. Authors may This may all sound a little depressing probably best not to offer a play for an
ask for a fee or share of any royalty, or they so I will add one more thing. Even though all-male cast. Consider the age of the
may give you permission to reproduce I work longer hours than I did while actors, too, and make sure the roles fit.
their work for nothing. employed, even though it’s very hard at
times and I never feel economically secure, What? What style of play does your
Q I’d like to give up my day job and

become a full-time writer of fiction.
writing for a living is still my dream job. targeted company prefer? Do they like
modern, comic, classic or traditional? What
How do I go about it?
Emily Parnell, Bournemouth Q A magazine I want to write for needs
a wordcount of 1000 words. How do
I know how many words I have written?
is the budget for scenery and costume? Be
prepared to adjust your script or possibly
do a major rewrite to suit requirements.
A I asked an author this same question

30 years ago and their reaction was:
‘Don’t do it!’ I ignored the slightly tongue-
There must be an easier way than
counting them. I am 61 and not terribly
computer literate.
Where? It needs to be ‘performable’, ie
it needs to work on stage. I knew a writer
in-cheek advice and went ahead anyway. P Wright, Warminster who was disappointed that a company
But it didn’t take long before I had to get turned down his play about a marbles
another day job to pay my mortgage.
The next time I attempted it, in 2000,
I was more prepared. Preparation is the
A Most word-processing packages have
a wordcount facility. My version of
Word shows it in the bar at the bottom of
tournament. But it would have been too
difficult to perform the necessary games
as a live show, a point he hadn’t considered
difference between success and failure. the window. Probably the best thing to when he set out to write it.
Everyone’s circumstances are different, do is to search for ‘wordcount’ in the help
of course, but here are my top tips for menu and follow the instructions. Failing When? Is your play seasonal? Bear this
making the switch: that, look up how to do it on the internet or in mind if you’re writing a pantomime.
ask at a local library or computer shop. There will only be a brief window for it
■ You will need to be already established and your targeted company may already
as a paid writer of fiction or non-fiction.
Doing both is a good plan, I have found.
Getting established takes time, so it’s
Q How would I go about getting my
play performed on a stage? I don’t
want to get paid for it, but I would really
have the slot booked.
• Della’s books on
important to build up relationships with like to see it come to life. writing, The Short
editors before you quit your job. I had been Gail Martin, via email Story Writer’s
getting paid for my writing for 13 years Toolshed and The
before I gave up work the second time.
■ If possible, don’t give up your day job
until your earnings as a writer equal your
A This can be harder than you might
think, considering how many theatre
companies are looking for scripts. You are
Novel Writer’s
Toolshed, are available
from Amazon
CHILDREN’S BOOKS
WRITING4CHILDREN
INCREMENTAL JOURNEY Sara Grant gives a step-by-step guide
to how she plans, writes and sells her series fiction
A
s a freelance editor
of series fiction at
Working Partners,
I’ve worked on 12
different series and edited
nearly 100 books – everything
from Rainbow Magic for young
readers to Striker, which was
a book for teens about spies
and football.
My newest series, Chasing
Danger, is an action-adventure
series for tweens. I think of it
as a teen Charlie’s Angels. I also
wrote a funny magical series
for younger readers called
Magic Trix, about a 10-year-
old girl training to be a fairy
godmother.
I’m always reading, watching
and listening to stories that
are in the same genre or have
some similarity with the book
or series I’m developing. I’ll
consider what works and what
doesn’t. I try to decipher why
I loved a certain book but
didn’t finish watching another
movie. Then I incorporate into
my project what I’ve learned
from these great storytellers.
I develop a project in
increments. I consider the
high‑level concept first.
Sometimes I’ll start with a
one-line pitch or write a few
paragraphs – a blurb, like the
copy found on the back of
the book. If I can find the hook
and a compelling idea, then I
begin to expand it.
Next, I’ll spend some
time developing characters
and researching setting. I
might complete a character
questionnaire or experiment
with my main character’s
voice. If I can, I’ll visit my
setting and take loads of notes,
pictures and videos.
Then I determine what a
reader will find in each book
PICTURE BOOKS STORY BOOKS EASY READERS CHAPTER BOOKS MIDDLE GRADE YOUNG ADULT
EASY READERS CHAPTER BOOKS MIDDLE GRADE YOUNG ADULT PICTURE BOOKS STORY BOOKS
with
children’s author
Anita Loughrey
in the series. What’s at the readers. What a seven-year-

heart of the series and what old finds compelling isn’t the
will keep readers coming back same as a 12- or 18-year-old.
for the next adventure. Kids must be at the heart
I brainstorm as many story of the story, drive the story
ideas as I can for a series. It’s and resolve the conflict. The
not good enough to think of complexity of the plots and
one amazing idea, you need subplots increases with the age
to figure out how you can of the reader. You also have
create that experience again to consider what language,
and again. The idea can have a motivations, actions and
fantastic hook, but it’s no good consequences are appropriate
if you can’t think of another for young readers.
idea and another… It can be challenging to tell
an exciting, believable story
My bible with characters who are limited
I always create a bible. It’s a by their youth. They may
practice I learned from my time not have the same access to becoming a fairy godmother. you don’t knock their socks
as a commissioning editor at technology that older children Early in the development off in the first book and
Working Partners. I create a do, and – unless you have a process, I create a high-level continue to wow them in each
document that includes details magical or fantastical element outline for each book in a subsequent book.
of my recurring characters and to your story – they can’t travel series. I need to understand Test your idea before you
setting as well as plot points. I by themselves and must be how each specific book will start writing the first book.
add to it as the series develops. home in time for bed. These have a complete and satisfying Where does it fit in the current
It’s difficult to keep the issues can be easy to overcome story but also add to the market? Understand what
backstory and history for for one book, but you need to overarching plot. makes your idea unique, why
multiple books in your head. make sure you can create an you are the only person who
It’s easy to mention in the first engaging story again and again The proposal can write it and why you feel
book that your main character with these limitations. When approaching agents and compelled to tell the story.
hates the colour purple and As part of the bible, I will editors I have a proposal that I think you have to be
then have her in a purple dress create a timeline for a series outlines the hook, age range, obsessed – in a good way –
in book four. I summarise the and understand how much genre and a cast list. I create about your idea.
plot of each book in the bible time will pass in each book. a detailed outline for the first Write the first book, create
so I don’t repeat ideas. At Working Partners, I worked book and write at least the your series proposal and then
I will also create a document on a series where time didn’t first three chapters of the first market it to agents. Don’t write
that notes key things that need really pass, the characters book. (Unpublished writers more than one book in a series
to happen in each book of a didn’t age, but I’ve tried to will need to complete the first until you have a book deal. If
series – sort of a checklist. For create a reasonable passage of book.) I create a brief synopsis you find a publisher, they may
example, in each Magic Trix time in my stories. It’s difficult for several more books to show have suggestions for changes
book, Trix’s nemesis Stella because you don’t want to limit how the idea can be expanded that will need to be filtered
always casts a vanity spell that your series by having your into a series. through all future books.
starts with the words: ‘Sparkle, characters grow up too quickly. My advice to writers who If you want to be a writer, if
glitter, shimmer, shine…’ It’s not necessary to have want to write a series is: write it’s in your DNA, be tenacious.
Three or four chapters will be an overarching series conflict, one amazing book! That may I wrote my first story for
written from the perspective but I like to have a plot that sound strange, but the first children when my niece
of Jinx, who is a feisty black will run over the course of book must be outstanding so Megan was born. I signed my
and white kitten. And I always many books. With Chasing that a publisher will want to first book deal the year she
wanted Trix to exclaim her Danger, I had a mystery that invest. Some writers tell me: graduated from high school,
catchphrase: ‘Creeping cats!’ evolved over a four-book arch. ‘The series really takes off in 17 years later. Now she’s also
When writing a series With Magic Trix, I outlined six book three.’ But no one will had two books published!
for children, you must take books that each took my main ever read the awesome stuff
into account the age of your character Trix one step closer to you planned for the finale if • Visit www.sara-grant.com
FREELANCE MARKETS
THE MAGAZINE SCENE

Adam Carpenter gives a round-up of launches, trends and other magazine news
NEW WOMEN’S MAG SEEKS NEW VOICES

Launching this August, Actual Size will steer away from the usual
women’s magazine fare. We spoke to founding editor Suzy Prince…
How did the idea for Actual Size come about?

For several years I’ve felt there’s a gap in the UK market for a
magazine for women that’s intelligent, design-led, non-patronising
and innovative. We aim to do things differently – we don’t care how
old our readers are or what you look like. We will never comment
disparagingly on a woman’s age, appearance or how she chooses to
live her life. But we will seek out the best and brightest in what’s
happening in the world and share it with as many people as possible.
What sort of ideas are you looking for?

We want as many voices as possible to feature in the magazine.
You don’t have to be a professional journalist, although feel free
to suggest contributions if you are. The magazine is on sale both
nationally and internationally, but content can be fully local as
long as it’s interesting and tells a good story.
The first issue is under wraps
What is the best way for people to approach you? but the website gives a taste
Email us at hello@actualsizemagazine.com to request our
contributor pack, which has further information about the best
ways to go about contributing, along with helpful advice.
MARKET NEWS
TUNE INTO WIRED’S WAVELENGTH
Launched in the UK in 2009, technology magazine Wired recently If you can’t work out how to cut an article to the right length,
celebrated its 100th issue with one of the last interviews with try recording it. Newly qualified journalist Delainey Garland
Stephen Hawking. Here are some ideas on how to pitch to them studied the art of producing a podcast and discovered how the
preparation beforehand and editing afterwards can help you reach
■ Senior editor Matt Burgess says: ‘We need to be able to speak the word-limit goal. Delainey said: ‘Be ready to throw away the
to the people who are building the technologies or know how they segments you assumed were most beneficial.’ The experience may
work. We like to really focus on specific elements, making things that even inspire you to start a podcast of your own. Empire associate
are technical not technical.’ So if you have a contact in a technology editor Chris Hewitt told the website journalism.co.uk: ‘You don’t
company, then you could have a good interview opportunity. have to wait for permission to do a podcast. We had been toying
■ This isn’t just a news and reviews title. Think about how technology with the idea for some time, and we had asked the higher-ups if we
affects the world at large. Digital editor James Temperton explains: could do it. They were dilly-dallying, so we just went and did it.’
‘It’s not just about gadgets and gizmos, it’s about how social networks
are affecting our democracies, how devices are changing the way we As a lot of newspapers and magazines base themselves in
live our lives. It’s not just simple stories, it’s the complex stuff.’ London, it is incredibly difficult for aspiring journalists from
■ Play to the curiosity of the readers, who will be interested in poorer backgrounds to afford to head to the big city to pursue
various technological fields and related areas. James says: ‘They want their dream. BBC journalist Olivia Crellin has founded a project
to be surprised about what is happening in the financial sector, in called PressPad which wants to match young people to a mentor in
Silicon Valley start-ups, in China and India. We bring that diversity to the business who will provide them with rent-free accommodation
their general curiosity.’ for the duration of their internship. Olivia only set up the project in
April but has already received over 50 offers of rooms from hosts,
Recent coverlines: Apple’s next move – how the world’s most and a flood of applications from graduates. ‘We want to reduce that
valuable company can own the future; Coining it – life inside the crypto financial barrier. You could have a million mentors in the world, but
bubble; China’s plan to turn social media into mass surveillance if you can’t afford to show up to work, you don’t have much of
a chance,’ she said. For more information, visit presspad.co.uk
THIS WRITING LIFE
INSIDE VIEW
MODERN WOMAN
This recent
print and
digital launch
aims to combat
inequality in
the workplace
through its
magazine
content and an GOING FOR A SONG
ongoing series
S
of networking
events. o there I was, arranging a song in Nashville… via email
Published six times a year, it wants to from an English village. To back up, you may remember that
shine a spotlight on women blazing a trail last month I told you how my song-writing pal, the Bear,
in the business world. Here’s how you can had asked me to help him out with the verses of a song he was
contribute… writing. I’m no composer, but as a sometime short-story writer
Inspirational business women he thought I’d be able to chip in with some lines to describe the
song’s narrator and setting.
The magazine is just as likely to be home to a mum of three It was an enjoyable little creative exercise that I tossed off in my
running a start-up business from her kitchen table as it is to a lunch break. Perhaps the words flowed easily because I wasn’t
high-profile businesswoman working high up in a multi-million- taking the project very seriously. After all, how many songs ever
pound company. Think about how women at various stages of
get recorded, let alone become hits? The odds must be up there
their career or running their own business can offer advice and
insights to others. Founder and editor Rosie Coxshaw says: with writing a bestselling novel, and I tend to focus on the more
‘The magazine exists to empower, to influence and to support reliable chances of earning a crust by penning magazine articles.
women in business. We provide newsworthy content that But although I originally met the Bear through his other job,
affects women in the workplace, as well as telling the stories as a fellow music critic, I was perhaps forgetting that he is also a
of inspiring women from all walks of life who are making their
professional tunesmith with a couple of bona fide chart hits on
mark in the business world and beyond.’
his CV. What had to me been just a playful distraction from my
Focus on business and career daily hack work was to him a song that he had every hope of
making some money from. What’s more, he liked my contribution.
Sections cover the typical staples of most women’s magazines Over the following week, we bounced the lyric back and
such as fashion and eating out. But this is no place to put forth by email, altering lines, swapping words and doing all the
yourself forward as a potential restaurant reviewer or fashion
polishing I’d normally put into a story. I began to take the task
correspondent – instead, why not think more about the part
these staples play in any business person’s working life. For more seriously and by the end of it was half-starting to believe
instance, how to choose the best place to take your staff to that we’d written something quite commercial.
lunch or a caterer who specialises in helping other businesses All we needed was a singer and a band to make a professional
retain and grow their client list. demo. These days, it appears that you can’t get away with a
songwriter throatily singing their song into a tape recorder with
Outlook is global
the accompaniment of a badly strummed guitar – you have to
Although, initially, most of the events seemed to be based in pitch potential singers a demo that sounds indistinguishable from
London, the magazine is definitely a place to share amazing a finished record. In fact, it’s not unknown for a singer to put a
stories of women in business from across the world. Editor demo on their album, simply replacing the demo singer’s voice
Rosie says: ‘Now, more than ever, is a time when women from with their own.
all cultures and all countries need to stand together, to support
The Bear knew a studio in Nashville that would provide us with
one another and, in doing so, realise the ultimate dream: to
live in a world without gender-based obstacles and to pave a recording for about $500 and it was a mark of his faith in the
foundations for a better future for all women globally.’ song that he was happy to put up the cost while cutting me in on
half the royalties should we make any.
Recent coverlines: Around the clock – 72 hours in Tel Aviv; That’s how I found myself, a few days later, in a three-way email
High notes – Mixcloud’s Xanthe Fuller’s plan to promote women
conversation, hammering out with the producer which instruments
in music
were going to come in where. Somehow, the seriousness of the
Visit: www.modernwoman.co process made the chances of having that elusive hit feel a little
more within reach.
FICTION MARKET
INSIDESTORY
Douglas McPherson swaps emails with the People’s Friend
fiction editor about a story based on the exchange of notes
S
ometimes a writer needs tax return and she’s suffering a
a friend. Or, rather, your
main character might
As the author you make a number bit of seasonal depression (not as
debilitating as the original story,
need a friend to talk to, of assumptions that the reader she’s just gone ‘into her shell’ a bit,
to help you tell their story. That and her reluctance to put the eggs
was the lesson I learned with wouldn’t. It’s what I term ‘authing’ out reflects her not wanting to get
Dear Hector, a tale that was out and about herself).
rejected by the People’s Friend 3) As you say, she doesn’t
but accepted after a rewrite. read one of Shirley’s blog posts a relationship. It happens first on assume the first two notes from
The story was the second saying she was having a purge page 4, when she thinks ‘there’s Hector have any romantic
I’d written in response to on widow stories because of no way she’s looking for a man.’ I overtones until…
a prompt on fiction editor a reader’s complaint that they was thinking he could be anyone: a 4) The third note, when he asks
Shirley Blair’s blog on the were depressing. The ‘no more family man, a dad, a young guy… her out, is a Valentine’s card.
Friend’s website: a photo of widows’ rule didn’t bode well and he has no idea about her Buster explains that Hector must
a fried breakfast. It inspired for my story of a depressed either. It’s what I term ‘authing’. have seen her about the farm so he
me to write Down the Aisle, a widow and sure enough, a So, sorry, Douglas, because knows what she looks like, but she
supermarket comedy that I rejection came my way: in many ways I do like this: the of course doesn’t know anything
wrote about in Writers’ Forum restoration of old country values, about Hector so he’s a classic
#194, and then a yarn about a I so much wanted to like this, the random act of kindness, even secret admirer… which makes
widow who sells eggs on a cart but I’m afraid it doesn’t work for the exchange of notes via the egg her wonder if she should accept a
outside her farm. me for a number of reasons. cart… but as a whole it’s not blind date. She could also feel she
The heroine, Geraldine, One is that I’m trying very working for me. needs her son’s approval so soon
spends most of the story in her hard to cut down on the number after his father leaving.
dressing gown, struggling to of widow stories in the Friend. Rethink 5) By the time she agrees to
find motivation in the face of We were aware of it becoming Well, it didn’t sound like there meet, it’s mid/late February so the
bereavement, and leaves a note commonplace, but then it was was much right with the story. first hints of spring are a metaphor
beside the cart’s honesty box to highlighted by an email from a But I was encouraged by the for her own new beginning.
apologise for having been too reader ‘sick to death’ of reading fact that Shirley wanted to like
down lately to put the eggs out. about them. And I couldn’t argue it and liked the basic premise Shirley replied: Yes, ping
To her surprise, one of her with her, she was absolutely right. of the notes on the egg cart. So it back in that form and I think
hitherto anonymous customers The second reason is that I had a rethink and wrote back: it will have a much better
leaves a get-well card on the Geraldine’s malaise is a) a bit chance. Isn’t it liberating that
cart. A week later, when the worrisome and b) tiresome (sorry!). I wondered if Dear Hector our characters can be separated/
eggs haven’t been out for a few How long has she been a widow? would work as a Valentine’s Day divorced now?!
days, Hector leaves another If it’s recent enough that she’s still story with the following changes:
note offering to go to the shops immersed in grief, she won’t be 1) Geraldine’s not widowed. Second draft
if she needs anything. contemplating a new relationship. She’s younger (50s) and her With an acceptance in sight,
Geraldine leaves a thank- If it’s not recent, why has the husband has left her. He thought I got to work on the changes,
you note explaining she has a blackness descended on her now? they were wasting their lives on a which were really only
son, Buster, to shop for her if I wondered: doesn’t she have small farm in the current climate, cosmetic as the structure was
necessary. But the exchange any friends? I wondered: what but she refused to give up land unchanged, plus a couple of
of notes culminates in Hector else does she do around the farm that’s always been in her family, other improvements.
inviting her out. I thought it – or rather, did she used to do? so he’s bailed out on her. However, First, I got Geraldine out of
was a sweet little romance Besides the eggs? And what’s been she’s wondering if she’s made the the dressing gown that Shirley
about rural isolation in happening to all of that while she right choice because… clearly disliked and made her
which Hector’s interest helps can’t get out of her dressing gown? 2) It’s the depths of January less of a sad sack. For instance,
Geraldine out of her malaise. And the last thing: as the and she’s feeling demotivated one original passage read:
author you make a number of because a) she’s just spent her
Rejection assumptions that the reader first Christmas without him; After three days of barely
The day after I submitted the wouldn’t. That Hector is her age, b) it’s a bleak, dead time on the stepping outside, except to feed
story, my heart sank when I eligible, available and looking for farm with little to do except her the chooks, Geraldine gathered a
6
began. Thank you for Slap 5
your concern. SHORT in the
STORY JULIA ,DOUGLAS
BYmiddle her I’m available?” Geraldine
little bungalow looked tiny. His playful eyes were
No, that was far too another asked. “How would he even
In the distance, she heard the note as an explanation. formal! She At the cart, she stopped, For two the egg
of people waswas
, itcart an know what I look like?”
turned sideways towards a
torePropped
off the behindidyllic envelope locatio n. withone, her name on fluffy grey cat that was
the grumble of a tractor It was funny, she puzzled.
sheet and started again. For it “He’s probably seen you
empty egg boxes was lookedit.impossibly lonely climbing affectionately
where her son Buster was reflected as she headed Dearsome Hector, Please around the farm when he
back up her drive with worry about an envelope in adon’t
cheery and remote The. envelope fluttered in around the back of his
clearing a ditch to drain the
around her. shade
me.
of I haveWritten
cerise. a in A the
movem breeze
ent in as she pulledpicked up his eggs,” Marion shoulders.
the
Floss dancing
lower field. son who can go to the
handwriting on the distancout a cardher
e caught with a pictureguesse of d. “Maybe he heard “Well, he’s a cut above
She knew he would have When she was growing up, shops iffriendlyI can’t get out. The nose a poppy fieldcar
eye.
on the front. the gossip about Ray. You the men on the dating site,”
everyone in the parish hadGerald front was Geraldine.
Geraldine of a blue know what it’s like in the
been up before dawn. He ine stared at it herand took pulled up Dear Geraldine. I noticed Gerald ine blurted out to
so
known each other, but handwriting and sighed She opened at the gap in the country.”
was a true countryman –
unlike his dad, as it had many, like Marion, had that sound out a card with flowers . Did on hedge at thethe eggs of her been out“You don’t think
endhaven’t Floss.
cold?
front. She didn’t
Inside, she read: drive. She a few days.
for wonde I hope you he’s a Unfolding the letter, she
turned out. moved away. the
want to sound cold. red if it stalker , do you?”
Sorry to hear you’re poorly. was theare mysterall right. If you need
ious Hector began to read.
There was still some pink With the small farms She felt like she’d .from “Well, you won’t know
and up Get well soon. been
(Eggs always She’d anything
checked the picked cartup Dear Geraldine, I’m a
swallowed by big farmscooped
in the cloudy sky.
harvester delish!)
on the farm with
Hector. before town,
she camecallout me.and Hector. unless you give him a call. divorced non-smoker with a
one man in a
“Shepherd’s warning”, her thoughts all winter. She
blinked in his card was left hisShe
had there.
He still phoneHe’s only suggesting coffee. GSOH. (I think that’s what
her dad used to say. able to do the work that had a needGeraldine to open up, didn’t know number the bottom.
at even
What do you have to lose?” they say in dating ads.
would have taken a whole even if itsurprise. She didn’t know if he’d “I don’t know anything
It had already been a was to a strang er. come by today. Geraldine raised her Sorry – I’m out of practice.)
village in her grandparents I’m’ notanyone called Hector. about him,” Geraldine told
rainy enough winter for ill, she found eyebrows. Did strangers Just moved to the village,
day, few people were herself writing Realising he was one ofThe car paused long her.
Geraldine’s liking. She felt . Just beencustomers, each “I’m beginn ing to wish
like she’d been wading connected by working bit on down her anonymous
and overdoing
a enough for offer help
stillsomeo ne totopick I’d never answered his note
looking for a fresh start.
she headed back up her up someother? eggs, but the If you’d like coffee, how
through mud for months. the land any more. things. Your card cheered and egged him on.”
raggedy hedge stopped her about I pick you up when I
At least it was dry for the Most locals now were me up. Thanks. Geraldine. “Oh, listen to you!”
seeing who it was. drop by for eggs at two
Someone really did give tuppence
moment, she consoled incomers: retirees or She wondered if she was Marion laughed. “It’s a
her overbo As the sleek vehicle p.m. on Monday? If you’re
herself. commuters. Neither ofgoing ard. He was a coffee. He sounds nice from not by the gate, I won’t be
whether her eggs were out or not!
nearest villages had astrang shop er who cruised away, Geraldine
Before she left the bought eggs, the cards he’s left.” offended. Yours hopefully,
or a post office any more, wonde red where she
kitchen, Geraldine had not a pen pal. She folded “Maybe.” Hector.
so there was nowherethe page, popped it in herself was heading. Or
jotted down a note that she an note again, After she finished the call,
drive with a smile. had she ground Reading to athe
pinned up in the back of people could meet. envelope and
So sealed
someone the really did she was
halt?
surprised how
Geraldine gazed at the
* * * *
the cart: Sorry no eggs
lately. I’ve been a bit under
Somehow the
network of produce stalls
little flap before she could
change hergive mind.
tuppence whether her * * * * when she’dthat
card,
much the offer touched her,and the flowery one
beenpreceded it.
“Do you think I should
go?” she asked Buster
maintained a sense of The nexteggs were out or not! For A week especially
later, Gerald ine She hadn’t told Marion,
the weather. I’ll try to keep morning, she ages, took
she Floss feeling so low. when he popped into the
community that the propped up the note at the first time in down to the cart but over Christmas, when
putting them out. Please thehad some to empty theShe likedy the way he’d kitchen on his way home
countryside was losing. back of thefelt like her life honest jar. she was feeling Ray’s
bear with me. Geraldine. egg cart with To Proppe left the card in the egg that evening. “I won’t if you
Geraldine had never met purpose. d up at the back absenc
She wondered if the note Hector written on the front. rather than pushing it e, she’d gone on think it’s too soon.”
Dear Hector . . .
was a pinkcart, envelo
* * * *
was over the top. Would the people she bought pe with some
She didn’t think anyone else or dating sites online.
anyone care whether her honey and jam from,would and take Dear Gerald ine on her
through the letter-box
front There “It’s OK, Mum,” her son
the people who
it.
The following week in Hector
was ’s knocking.
handw It felt respectful was a special one for
riting. replied. “I’m not a kid, and
didn’t know
eggs were out or not? From the way her
she ers always black as it hit Geraldine Her alleyebro and wsunintrusive
shot – thecountr
way y folk – Muddy although I’m not happy
Clover Farm was on a bought her eggs, butcustom left to Marria
be. ges, or Muck and
felt a connection to them, over again their what Raytoward had s her fringe folk
country as she used about Dad going, he’s gone
quiet lane with little money in the jar, she marriedtook
done. She’d him at out a card withcarried
As she the Bullets
card or something. and it weren’t none of it
passing traffic, and she even though the only reckoned they a big Maybe
contact was an anonymous
were an and never
twenty-seven heart and Happy up the drive, she wondered she was picky, or your fault. I think it’s time
knew from experience that honest bunch. perhap s it was just too
thought she’d find herself Valentine’s who Day the mysterious Hector
in glittery you started going out and
people often drove a pound dropped in a jar. That afterno on, Gerald soon, but none of the
alone at ine
fifty-four. lettering onwas. the front. enjoying yourself again.”
profiles had tempted her. A
considerable distance out
of their way to buy home-
on your plate. If I can get her* * * *
feet
took Floss for
into
the her
path wellies
that
a walkhad
She’d
bounded
yard.
along
of her
course. roman
She tic thought had* * * *
plenty of It was so long since a blind date was even worse.
“Suppose he turns up and
doesn’t like the look of
grown producethrougfrom
the as withou
h Christm
Thet following
and went top into
afternoon,
out field.the warning, crosse it That evening, as she Once
ate again, though, she me?” Geraldine laughed
on a yfarm, could even have averted d her mind that she
They had only ever written to
with a wintry dusk galready
Growin up didn’t feel she could leave
Ray,various
stalls outside I can get through Januar had passed, and
she wasn’t so stubborn.
ifearly didn’t even know a plateit of stew alone at her nervously.
propertiesJanuar in they.” parish. falling on she’dthe barren always trees,
althou been gh an she knew it was they were living-room
was the the
table, with invitati on unanswered. “Of course he will!”
each other – was it time to
Geraldine walked down
knew tothe chill He thought Valent ine’s Day.
There was“Ithe stillstand
can’t believe he left riser and too early to say winter was down Taking
and a deep breath, she Buster said. “He’s probab
house in the egg cart breezeto collect
would her
blow somewasting of their lives onStartle a d, she glancedturned
television up found ly
outside that white
Marion said. over, it was one of those in the corner, her curly writing already seen you going
meet up? you,”
the village where Beforeshe Geraldine could takings and herany cobweempty bs away.
fresh
customers
egg
days with
on a cart
farm that barely turned
profit, a clear
by but blue
Clover
and down
anyone
Farm
a
had was
the unwatched
lane to see
Geraldine
there, watchi gazed
if
atpaper
the two and began to write. about the farm, and that’s
answerup
regularly picked , shea jar of Marion
heard boxes ’s that her Selling eggswhen she could almost
sky
her cards on her
ng
mantel Dear
shelf. Hector, Thanks for why he asked
returned. didn’tthe been in her family for years
much
addapproa reaction to a prank, but the invite, you out.”
fresh honey; doorbe ll in the backgrhad
a table ound. her gate taste
and ch of was no way
there road wasShe
the she thought
desert of the phone but I don’t think I Geraldine wasn’t sure.
of the most Geraldine, After a depressingto the income spring.of Clover ed. She couldthe go out with someone
T
bearing jars“I’m sorry, inside Ray’s departure had left a
“Oh, sorry, Marion.”delicious jam a afternoonFarm, rounding which up was why she’d
was letting it go. neverthelessnumber steppedpenned a I’ve never met.
HE sound of a car that outside
will be –” Would this year be better
t little shyly into
her living-room, latest one. big dent in her confidence.
slowing on the lane Geraldine turned her bungalow in Back Lane; invoices and found receipts for
so easy
it than last, neglec
toshe Pacing the privacy
way Did she that sound harsh, she
“Don’t worry, I’ll call you return, wondered.up her of phone to before
her drive There was no At least she had the
attention back to the and the place down Farrow her tax the task shefor was the past sweek.she picked openin g wonde a Softening, she
made Geraldine
phone. “I haven’t put Road the later.” The month before
haveers it out Raywith him theagain.
card to read. was going to call him. In red. weekend to get her courage
glance out of her whereThey theresaidwastheir rushed glad to get some The coins cold
had her left custom
hadn’t been easy. found the added,
offer a I don’t even know up.
eggs out again, and just earthy air droppe in her lungs. into the
dLookin honest Then y she slammed the Dear Gerald ine, she
way, I hope
living-room window. always a wheelbarrow full
goodbyes and Geraldine g back, she realisebackdon theyou are feeling
table. embarrassing
bitbetter. . what
It wasn’tyou look like.
saw someone pull up of seasonal
The nose of a blue car
ed at the end of her looking for them.” the gate. turned grey and brown
back tobythe window
veg parked People
amount
, didn’t realise
jar were
paperwork
ofliterall
she’d thebeen
chicken
– theyinpaid
ycracks
feed,
their
phone
ignoring thebeen through
the
for They’d
relatio
wondeitred all if you she were
as ifwould
I
like
Geraldine.
an invalid
Impuls
in
ively, she added a
* * * *
appear
“Hens not laying?” her with its
involved inbrood running foraafarm.
Gerald ine kept in her nship
before. There wastonotake going a break need from assistance.
of work
smiley face.
On Sunday night she
long driveway, then pulled It was always
vista of bare trees and long
.
time.
back. and come for a The
coffee more the card drew could hardly sleep, but by
friend asked. drive nd.out The strain had seemed
kitchen garden with
away again as soon as the disappointing tofarmla She’d always thought
driver saw that the little “No, the hens are fine.”
for
this
some
bleak
honey and
She couldn’t find help less
feeling when RayA had
farm shared
theirwasn’tproble a farm
ms
Hugging herself as in
would pass.
me she
Pond Farm. Give
in, she noticed
her
she me
eye,
that new shop at Mill
feltathe
though,
* * * *the
to
more
callneed Three days later, there
morning she’d made her
decision.
Geraldine sighed. “It’sshe’d toothe
left itjust late in thet bit enviouit, ands shewithouwondered t awas
It fewhard chicken s
held it all
covered cart by the of teenies to believe he’dcard on the like to.acknowledge
if you’d the stranger’s She took a deep breath
old bird who’s been out sold friend’sbriefly if hescratch gave
ing about,
ever abando it aned in the flowery Hector. was another envelope in
roadside was empty. day and the
time
be the out. her oldwas
of stand school that hope.
And if above the fire and
shelf kindness. and wrote the last note
Geraldine sighed
never seen the driver,
. She’d sorts.
of year
It
–
must
Januar y blues or
Geraldine
busy life in the city.
didn’t like the
second
Buster
thought
Gerald
was a
they were
now.
ine’s
good
Pausin book.
lad,
laying,
g under
she
oak at the top of the hill,
the ancien
might
realised she t
hadn’t * * * *
put the As soon as she’d finished
she went toGerald
the cart. A
her ine’s pulse
letter this time. she’d leave for Hector in
* * * *
to e. out again. “A secret admire eating, the egg cart.
whatever. I can’t seem of her regulars but he hadasa well wifeshe and
sell twoproduc
the eggs r, eh?” quickened as she opened it.
because her raggedy thought looked down at
on a diet her Marion teaseddesk whendrawer andShe took out a photog Dear Hector, I don’t think
Illustration by Sailesh Thakrar.
put my mind to anythin g.”

* * * *
trip to her g, toddlers toShe home
go couldn to in laid
live
’t ty,
hawthorn hedge blocked want to
making
visit for
a special
The next mornin as proper
end ofafter
out like a
all. Gerald ine phoned rummaged
her for some writing raph it would be wise to accept a
“Do you at
the cottageof omelet the tes,farm set, with later. and straightened her back,
her view of the cart, but she egg cart and
asked.
goingthe
Jagger
homerooster called child’s
sheThe its next morning, “Lucky stillyou. I didn’tpaper. The rose-coloured lift from a stranger. But if
ised the car as one a few days?” Marion empty-hande d. bare fields the lane.
with “Come patchwon, ork Floss,”
of fields, barns
even impres sed.
recogn at across the a card frompad
getgathered she found was curled you come to the coffee
“Clara’s home from uniShe’d blue doodleWhen
the cock-a- -do, hecalled left work to her
and each collie asfuming, she Geraldine Tom!” Hector
of her regulars. A regular still
noticed
a cheery pond.
egg of eggs and “What makesat end. Did anyone was a ruggedly
thethink shop, you’ll find me waiting
the moment, but I can visitson aevening and she cooked
carried a basket full of a basket him suave
she had let down again.
find room.”
car make two fruitless
Gerald ine pulled
dinner for just herself,
down the
her drive. headed down the drive. write letters any more?man in his mid-fifties. for you. Geraldine. n
“Are you still there? ” a in the past couple of days r, stuck boxes
“No, you’ve got enough quilted body warme Propped up at the back Dear Hector, she
voice said in her ear. and felt the need to leave farm felt very empty.
basket of eggs and headed down story and one when Geraldine the moment, but I can still find A farm wasn’t a farm without a
the drive. She was wearing her has just received Hector’s room…’ few chooks and ducks scratching
dressing gown and wellies, her Valentine’s card. ‘No, you’ve got enough on about, in Geraldine’s book.
ashy blonde hair unbothered with, Instead of most of the story your plate without listening to For the past week, though,
even though Buster would soon be taking place in Geraldine’s me moan. If I could get through she’d been too tired to drag herself
round for his coffee. head and being told in narrative Christmas without Ray, I can get down to the end of the drive to
form, her thoughts and through January.’ replenish the cart.
The new tone was more backstory were now largely ‘I still can’t believe he left you,’ She told herself she’d have to
upbeat: conveyed through dialogue: Marion said. make more effort tomorrow – then
Before Geraldine could answer, let out a yawn. If only she didn’t
As Jagger the little red rooster ‘Are you still there…?’ a voice she heard Marion’s doorbell in the feel so wretchedly tired.
called across the bare fields with said in her ear. background.
his cheery cock-a-doodle-doo, ‘Oh, sorry, Marion.’ Geraldine ‘I’m sorry, Geraldine, that will Luckily the rewrite met
Geraldine pulled on a quilted turned her attention back to the be…’ Shirley’s egg-spectations and
body warmer, stuck her feet into phone. ‘I haven’t put the eggs out ‘Don’t worry, I’ll call you later.’ our exchange of emails ended
her wellies and went out into the again, and just saw someone pull on a happy note:
yard. Growing up on a farm, she’d up looking for them.’ That made much livelier
always been an early riser and ‘Hens not laying?’ her friend reading than pages along the ‘It’s a smacking wee mature
knew the chilled breeze would asked. lines of: romance now, isn’t it? Fun yet with
blow some of her cobwebs away. ‘No, the hens are fine,’ Geraldine depth, too. Payment on its way.’
sighed. ‘It’s this old bird who’s Selling eggs on a cart by her
Friendly hand been out of sorts. Must be the gate didn’t add much to the How to Write and
The biggest change was that time of year - January blues or income of Clover Farm. The coins Sell Fiction to
I gave Geraldine a friend, whatever they call it. I just can’t her customers dropped into the Magazines by
Marion, who had moved to seem to put my mind to anything.’ honesty jar were chickenfeed – Douglas McPherson
town but with whom she had ‘Do you want to come over they literally paid for the handful is available to
two phone conversations, for a couple of days?’ Marion of hens Geraldine kept at the download from the
one at the beginning of the asked. ‘Claire’s home from uni at side of her small kitchen garden. Kindle store.
WRITING EXERCISE
HOW IS YOUR
DIALOGUE?
said. ‘Of course you’re coming!
It’s all booked –‘
‘Well, unbook it. Me and Paula
are off on a long weekend.’
‘That you’re not!’ Mum yelled,
slamming down the iron. ‘You’ve
only just met that awful girl – ’
Or you could write it in

indirect dialogue:
Darren went into the kitchen

and announced that he would
not be going on holiday with the
family this year. Mum, who was
doing the ironing, went wild.
The first example moves

the story on and shows the
conflict between mother and
son. Because we can hear the
characters’ reactions, the scene
is brought to life. In the indirect
example, we are merely told
Barbara Dynes explains the role that dialogue must play what happened, which would
have been fine had it been an
in your stories – and sets an exercise irrelevant part of the plot. But
it is obviously an important
Dialogue must 1) Further plot should achieve both. If it reads the story with such static stuff scene, so it works better shown
2) Express character … Dialogue naturally, whilst complying just slackens any tension you in direct dialogue.
is the thin bridge which must, with those points, you can be may have built up.
from time to time, carry the entire confident that it works. You need to move things Expressing character
weight of the novel (or short Dialogue is an asset to fiction on by adding to the main Check that your dialogue is
story). Two things must be kept in that it lends immediacy to problem or bringing in another as natural as possible. What
in mind – a) the bridge is there to the writing; it lightens and dimension or surprise. And age are your characters? A
permit advance, b) the bridge must brightens the page. Who hasn’t you can do that effectively teenager would not speak in
be strong enough for the weight. wanted to cheer when some by using dialogue. That way, the same way as his 70-year old
From Pictures and dialogue pops up after reams the story will read far more grandad. Always ensure your
Conversations by Elizabeth of narrative? It acts as a kind entertainingly than had you characters’ speech differs.
Bowen of breather! just ‘told’ the reader the facts. No two people, even if they
A
Example: are the same age, should speak
t the revision stage, Moving the story on exactly alike.
we should check Never waste words. Too many ‘I’m not coming, Mum,’ he Dialogue is a great way to
that each piece of polite exchanges – ‘Hello, how announced. ‘I’m done with family add to your characterisation. In
dialogue in the story are you?’ – or comments about holidays!’ that first example about Darren
does at least one of those the weather will only bore Silence. Mum went on ironing and his mum, we learn a lot
two essential things: moves your reader (unless, of course, Dad’s shirt and he sighed. Had she about the pair from what they
the story on in some way or a character’s state of health or heard him? At last, she looked up, say and how they say it.
expresses the character of the the coming thunderstorm are frowning. Also, try to avoid too many
person speaking. Preferably, it vital to the plot). Holding up ‘Don’t be stupid, Darren,’ she speech tags, such as ‘he said’,
Writers’FORUM
‘she said’. Use them just to
keep things clear. If you’ve got
the individual dialogue right,
it should be obvious who is
idiom sparingly. It’s better to
give a taste and let the readers’
imagination do the rest. Write
as you usually do and flavour
EXERCISE
speaking.
When you do use tags, don’t
feel compelled to replace said
the sentences with Welsh
words and phrases rather than
overdoing the dialect.
Speak easy
A
with she cried, he moaned, etc. Historical fiction, too, can be
Select one of the situations below and
Plain words such as said, replied handled in that way.
and asked are fine because the
write a page of dialogue between the
reader doesn’t notice them. Indirect dialogue characters. In each case, ensure the two
Leave out the adverbs, It is always better to use people sound completely different, even if
too; she said despairingly is direct dialogue if you can, but they are of similar age and background.
an example. Again, how the sometimes indirect is necessary.
character feels should be there For instance, if you’ve earlier ■ Two women of around 40 in a heated discussion on
in her actual speech. written a scene and one bringing up children
This is why I always try to character needs to describe it to ■ A stroppy teenage girl and her grandmother argue about
get to know my characters another, it can be skipped over the girl staying out late
before I start. That way it is in indirect dialogue: ■ A man and his boss discuss the way a job is done
easier to make the dialogue ■ Two cars pull over in a lay-by. The drivers – an older man
unique to that person. ‘He told his boss that John had and a young lad – get out and argue about driving.
If you have information to been in a minor accident earlier
get across, don’t be tempted to and was now in hospital.’
add it to the dialogue or it will Notes
sound unnatural. Or when someone has to
Example: explain something the reader
doesn’t need to know in detail:
‘But Don, I thought you moved
here, then met Sue later, on that ‘She showed her how to plait
course? Before she got ill, I mean.’ the child’s hair and left the room.’
/ / /
‘Yes, Kate. That was two years Completed My scene rating
back when I worked at Smith’s.’ When writing a long speech,
B
you can often mix indirect with
There, dialogue is used direct dialogue, which varies it. The following situation can be seen from
just as a vehicle to convey the viewpoint of either character. Rewrite
informationand everything To sum up, the main points each version entirely in dialogue, showing
sounds really artificial. No one to aim for in dialogue: their different characters through what
would tell someone else things
they say and how they say it.
they already know. ■ It must a) move the story
Also, don’t overuse names on or b) express character. ■ The interviewer, a 50-year-old woman, gives the applicant
(Don and Kate, above). Talking Preferably both
some facts about the job, then ends the interview. She feels
to someone in real life, we ■ Short speeches are usually
irritated by the young applicant’s meek attitude. The girl
rarely address them by name, far more effective
except perhaps at first greeting. ■ If you must use speech tags, looks positively scruffy and obviously has not made much
Keep characters’ speech as keep them plain: he said, she effort to make an impression. Yet there is a sincerity about
short as possible. In real life, asked her as she tries to answer the questions.
people don’t go on and on, ■ Create tension
unless they are delivering a ■ Cut the adverbs: the fact ■ The applicant, a young single mother, is so nervous she
lecture. We are interrupted all that she spoke sadly should be stammers when she answers the questions fired at her.
the time: someone else butts reflected in what she says Trying to tuck her feet under the chair to hide her old shoes,
in, we lose the thread of what ■ Know your characters. Each she knows she is messing up her chances. She desperately
we’re saying, or we um and ah should speak differently needs this job, but the interviewer’s blunt way of questioning
as we speak.
confuses and annoys her. After a while, knowing she has no
Yet we can’t imitate real The best advice of all, to
hope of getting the job, she stops pretending…
speech exactly or we’d just ensure it sounds natural: READ
irritate our readers. We have to YOUR DIALOGUE ALOUD!
find that middle line. Notes
In the same way, watch your
characters’ vocabulary. Would Barbara Dynes’ latest
that young girl really use that book, Masterclasses
long word? in Creative Writing,
If you must add dialect – is published by
you want to make someone Constable & Robinson
/ / /
Welsh, for instance – use the at £9.99 Completed My scene rating
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THE BUSINESS
BECOMING A WRITER
Kath Kilburn looks at how to keep yourself healthy when working at home
A
re you sitting cycles. ‘The ideal solution.’
comfortably? Then Don’t feel discouraged,
I’ll… Oh, wait a though, if you can’t match
minute, though. Jaimie’s fantastic dedication
You’re a writer, so the chances to being a healthy writer.
of you sitting comfortably The important thing is to do
are minimal. You’re probably something. Walking to the
hunched over a laptop perched library to research your subject;
on your knee. Or, like me, you jogging to the cafe to fetch
might be trying to peer through yourself a coffee – it’s all good.
varifocal lenses and straining Author of the fabulous A
your eyes in the process? Bad Winter, Samantha Priestley
Maybe you’ve been typing for makes sure she starts her day
hours, causing nerve damage with a stroll.
to your wrist – carpal tunnel ‘I started doing a daily walk
syndrome, anyone? mostly to get me out of the
It’s not exactly clambering up house. I found I could go days,
scaffolding without a harness sometimes the whole week,
or looking after the lions at An extreme solution
without leaving the comfort
Whipsnade, but the writer’s life from Robb Godshaw of my home and I knew this
is not without its dangers and at instructables.com couldn’t be good for me,
you need to take steps early on physically or mentally.’
to minimise the health hazards. This is a real problem for
And I’ve realised, through to Spotify and having a little else, including writing. writers. We need interaction
many years’ experience and dance round the living room. If you exercise with a friend and variety to keep us fresh
much discussion with fellow Or you could slip that yoga there’s the added benefit of a but the writer’s life makes
writers, that the one thing that DVD into the telly and do some different perspective on your hibernation so easy.
will help prevent or relieve the basic stretches. writing. Kath used to chat with Samantha’s 20-minute walk
general run of writerly health Short story writer Sandra her son about ongoing projects every morning provides fresh
issues is simply stepping away Beswetherick uses household when they ran together. air and exercise and prepares
from the computer desk for a chores to break up periods of ‘Many plot ideas were her for the working day.
while and having a break. writing, which makes perfect thrashed out around the 6-7km ‘I’ve ironed out many writing
I know it’s simple, but do sense, but I suspect she has mark!’ she says. tangles while on my morning
you actually make the effort to more self-discipline than I do. Another expert at working walk,’ she says.
rest your eyes, hands and brain Personally, I play badminton exercise into her writing routine
every so often? If you use the (a plan I re-thought, having (and I mean right into it – I’m I’m going to sum up for you,
break to exercise rather than landed face-down on the court, in awe of her) is acclaimed because I’m helpful like that.
languishing on the sofa glued but a new pair of shoes later chick-lit writer and author of First off, incorporate breaks
to Homes Under the Hammer, so and I’m good to go again). The Little Wedding Island, Jaimie for all your working parts –
much the better. But an hour once a week isn’t Admans. Jaimie has treated brain, hands, eyes, back – into
A happy spin-off is that enough; you need regular herself to an ‘exercise bike your writing routine. Having
exercise of any sort can jolt you bursts. I did start a magazine desk’ and now cycles between good intentions to do this is not
out of a creative cul-de-sac, challenge, in which participants 40 and 50 miles per day. the same as actually doing it.
giving you a new perspective, aim to walk 1000 miles in a ‘I barely notice I’m doing it,’ Second, use at least some
different experiences and year. Somehow, we’re a good she says. of those breaks to exercise, or
that vital daydreaming time. way through the year and I’m Jaimie summed up the otherwise work some moving
(If I’m honest, Homes Under stuck on 80 miles. Don’t do as problem: ‘When you’ve got an about into your day.
the Hammer could provide I do. impending deadline, it’s easy Third, fresh air and company
inspiration – I’ve sold stories Kathleen McGurl, whose to tell yourself that you can’t can be useful add-ons, which
based on popular TV shows in latest book, The Girl From afford an hour off for a walk will spark your creativity, offer
the past. But I digress…) Ballymor, is attracting excellent or something.’ inspiration and give you a
What’s the best way to reviews, is a regular runner Gaining weight and losing fresh perspective.
incorporate a bit of beneficial and walker. She runs twice fitness is no fun, but with Look after yourself. No one’s
moving around into your a week and can confirm that the exercise desk (literally an going to write your particular
working day? It could be as fresh air and exercise give you exercise bike with a desk on the bestseller but you, so we need
simple as switching your PC more energy to do everything front), Jamie can type as she you to be in peak condition.
SHORT SHORT WRITING
Writers’FORUM
FLASH COMP RESULTS
Last month’s task was a story based on a mysterious true incident
T
he mysterious map alert that I received on my phone one
morning – 9 miles to the Silent Woman – inspired my latest flash
challenge. It prompted a wide range of stories offering various
explanations; some technical, some supernatural. Quite a few of you
felt impelled by the rather misogynistic pub name to write stories
championing women or feminism. One or two ignored the unusual
nature of the message altogether, missing the opportunity.
£100 winner
Who’s Listening? by Stacey Brown, Mansfield, Notts
I
stared at the alert: ‘9 miles to the Silent Woman.’ This was the
third time the alert had appeared. I unlocked the phone to take
a closer look at the map.
The door slammed, I threw the phone back in the drawer just as ‘You have reached your destination.’
Harry walked in the bedroom. I looked up at the brick building, a statue of a woman holding a
I smiled nervously. ‘You’re home early.’ child was in the garden.
He narrowed his brown eyes at me. ‘And?’ He threw his jacket I stepped from the car and was met on the steps by a friendly
on the bed. woman. She looked down at the phone in my hand.
‘I haven’t had time to prepare breakfast.’ She smiled. ‘Welcome to the Silent Woman, a refuge for women
‘Well, you have until I get out of the shower.’ He turned around. and children. Come in, you’re the third lady this week Pixel heard
‘Pixel, turn the shower on and play rock.’ that needed saving.’
Music filled the air as he shut the bathroom door. I counted to
ten, grabbed my phone and tucked It into my bra before I hurried Editor’s comments I liked the unusually positive spin this story
downstairs. put on new technology. Understandably, writers often take a dystopian,
I grabbed the kettle and with my thoughts on the alert I Big Brother view of data-mining and surveillance but here the virtual
stupidly turned the cold tap on. I heard his scream before the door assistant, Pixel, comes to the rescue. The near-future plot nicely
slammed. I dropped the kettle into the sink and backed away explains the nature of the message: it’s just a computer unemotionally
from the door as he flung it open. giving the answer to the problem it hears.
‘What do you think you’re doing?’ he yelled.
‘I’m… I’m s… s… orry,’ I stammered. Runner-up
I didn’t have chance to protect myself before he slapped me. The Salt, For Protection by Rebecca Burton, Tongham, Surrey
R
strike knocked me to the floor. I knew better than to cry, instead I
climbed to my feet slowly and waited for my next punishment. As ubbing sleep from my eyes with one hand, I fumbled for my
much as I tried the tears still managed to seep down my cheeks. phone with the other and swiped the alarm off.
He shook his head. ‘You’re pathetic.’ He turned and walked out. Sinking into my pillows, I unlocked the screen to find a
I dropped to my knees and cried into my hands. I felt my phone notification from the map app that I refuse to use. I’m an old-
buzz against my skin. My hands shaking, I grabbed it. fashioned girl, I like my dead-tree maps and clinging to the
‘9 miles to the Silent Woman.’ feeling that I’m not being tracked everywhere I go.
I bit my lip as I started the directions. I looked up, his car keys Nine miles to the Silent Lady, the message read.
were hung on the hook. I took a deep breath, grabbed the keys I’ve lived in this village all of my life and had never heard of the
and hurried to the front door. ‘Pixel, lock the doors and set the Silent Lady, but I shrugged and thought nothing of it as I hauled
alarm.’ myself out of bed.
I hurried through the door, ran to the car and jumped in. I I was in the shower when my phone buzzed imperiously. I
backed off the drive, not caring that I hit the bin, and drove down stuck my head around the shower curtain, with its cheery print of
the road. rubber ducks, to read the message.
‘In 200 yards turn right. Continue for seven miles.’ Six miles to the Silent Lady, it said.
I followed the route, I kept looking in the rear-view mirror even Frowning, I finished my shower and got dressed. How could
though I knew there was no way he could follow me. a place be getting closer when I hadn’t moved? It must just be a
‘Turn left and continue for two miles.’ glitch, I thought.
I wondered when everything had changed, when had I allowed The kettle whistled as it boiled. Curious, I flipped open my
him to be the abuser. When had he stopped comforting me when I laptop on the kitchen table and ran a search for the ‘Silent Lady’. I
cried? When had all the soft whispers and gentle caresses become found a book by that name, and a boat, and a racehorse. There was
yelling, slaps and punches? one pub on the second page, but miles away. And on the third, a
HOW TO ENTER
link to a blog post, ‘Nine miles to the Silent Lady’. Writers’FORUM

FLASH COMP
My heart beat faster as I clicked on it and my phone buzzed on
the counter.
Three miles to the Silent Lady.
I scanned the article and the words jumped out at me – unusual
notifications, a phantom, a grey woman who steals voices and
souls, danger, protection. No, I couldn’t believe this. It was just
some urban legend. I was too rational for this rubbish. Enter our monthly quick writing
My phone buzzed again.
One mile. contest with a £100 first prize
T
I jumped up, digging through my kitchen cupboards, scattering
packets of herbs on the floor. Just as I grabbed what I was hunting he editor’s monthly competition for short short
for, there was a knock on the door.
writing has a £100 prize for one winner and a
Hiding my hand behind my back, I opened the front door, just
a crack.
number of runners-up may also be published,
Standing on the step was a replica of me. Perfect to the last depending upon the nature of the contest and available
detail, except for the colour. Her skin, her hair, her clothes were all space. The flash competition is FREE FOR SUBSCRIBERS
dirty grey, but she had my eyes, startlingly blue in her grey face. (single entry only). For non‑subscribers (or extra
‘Time to leave,’ she said. ‘Ssh…’ subscriber entries) the entry fee is £5, which you can
‘…’ My protests, my denial, my rejection, all fell from my lips purchase by following the link on the Writers’ Forum
into dead silence. website (www.writers-forum.com).
I screamed for help, but she swallowed the sound before it could Entry is strictly by email only.
clear my throat. She leaned towards me, in a dreadful parody of a
kiss, as I stood frozen in place in the doorway. Writers’ Forum wants to encourage you to write, so:
Somehow, I grasped the strength to swing my hidden hand,
throwing the handful of salt straight into her face. Only then did ■■ We will have a theme/task each time so that new
the scream sound, my scream, as she shrivelled into smoke and writing has to be produced.
vanished. ■■ There will be a tight deadline so that results can be
I slammed the door and slumped to the floor as I fought back
published quickly and entrants can’t dither!
heaving sobs, comforted by the sound my own crying.
The editor’s decision is final and no correspondence over
Editor’s comments Having the destination move closer results will be entered into. By entering, entrants agree to these
added an extra chill to this story. It uses the theme of silence and
rules and for their entries to be published in Writers’ Forum.
sound nicely, with a strong last line. I liked how the protagonist used
technology against the threat, Googling to find a way to beat it.
Highly commended COMP 201:

The Power of Suggestion by Bill Randall – a man is directed to the TOURIST TRAIL
Silent Woman pub to meet a mistress he used to see there years ago.
But waiting for him is his son – who’d added the alert to his dad’s Deadline: 12 noon
phone to test whether he was still being faithful to his mother. GMT on 25 June 2018
Tag by Saul P Tiler, Redhill, Surrey – several entrants saw the mystery Editor’s assignment: Go on a nice walk (or bus
message as a code involving hitmen or spies, but this story was about ride or drive depending on mobility) and write it up in
an ‘e-cleaner’, someone who deletes people’s digital fingerprints. The 450-500 words for a local magazine. Give it a theme/point
silent woman is a rape victim whose attackers escaped justice because so it doesn’t ramble. Plan it beforehand but be open to
of his skills; somehow the technology is fighting back to punish him. opportunity en route. Concentrate on scenery, history
and the characters you meet rather than dry directions.
Shhh by Jennifer Riddalls, Crondall, Hants – a woman is notified by her
Use pithy description to transport your reader.
phone as her daughter steals the car to go the Silent Woman pub to
meet her estranged father. But the daughter is the result of a rape. The
woman realises she can no longer stay silent about the crime.
How to enter
1 Paste your entry straight into the body of a new email
The Spark by Pamela Gough, Little Eaton, Derbys – a woman just out (NOT as an attachment) followed by the wordcount
of a controlling relationship gets the mystery alert. It turns out to be and your name and address. Give your purchase order
an invite to a pub from a man she met at a works do the night before. number or state if you’re a subscriber to check against
He’d set the alert on her phone while she popped to the loo. Realising our database. Add a line or two about what inspired you.
he’d be just as bad as the previous boyfriend, she blocks his number.
2 In the email’s subject line box, write Flash Comp 201:
Hearts and Time by Anoosh Falak Rafat, Hastings, E Sussex – a man followed by a helpfully descriptive title for the route.
gets ready while pondering the strange message. He finally recalls that 3 Send your email to flashcomp@writers-forum.com
he’d set the alert with a girlfriend at uni; they were going their separate by the deadline above.
ways but promised to meet up in five years. He now has a wife and
child, and, despite a feeling of regret, he disregards the message. The results will be published next issue. Good luck!
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E: assistant@silverwoodbooks.co.uk | T: +44 (0)117 910 5829 Readers can contact the author at
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INSPIRATION
THE WRITERS’
M
y murder mystery, Murder Served so. Ensuring that he protected the identity
Cold, is to be published in October of his patients with changes in names
by Crooked Cat Books. I’ve (including his own, of course), events and
written many pocket novels and other details, but keeping the original spirit of
serials but this is my first full-length novel. I’m each story, he came to write his first book,
excited and apprehensive in equal measure, Drops of Reality.
because the whole pre-publication process He found himself a good editor and the
takes me way out of my comfort zone. As for book was published on Amazon to excellent
Paula Williams has been eavesdropping again – with murderous results

where the idea came from, it was a snippet of ended up as a 80,000-word full-length novel is reviews. So much so that this ‘accidental
conversation overheard in my local pub. another story. Watch this space. author’ is already planning a second book.
The talk around me was focused on
England’s poor performance in cricket, football I love hearing from readers, so I was delighted Here are your weekly prompts for July:
or whatever, and my attention was already to hear from a GP who writes under the name
wandering when I heard this voice across the of Dr MA Moss and who became a published ● 2 July: ‘Once writing becomes your major
other side of the bar. author, he tells me, almost by accident. vice and greatest pleasure, only death can stop it.’
‘Well,’ he said, ‘everyone knows Marjorie Writing, for him, was a duty all through (Ernest Hemingway).
Hampton killed the farm shop.’ school and medical school and it wasn’t ● 9 July: Secrets and lies.
Now, I know Marjorie Hampton (not her until he decided to train as a GP that things ● 16 July: Being lost along the way.
real name). She’s a gentle, inoffensive soul changed. ● 23 July: Stolen moments.
who wouldn’t kill a fly, least of all a farm shop. ‘Family practice introduced me to people ● 30 July: Someone sends you flowers but
Marjorie Hampton is now the name of one from all walks of life; every day was different, there’s no card. Who sent them? Why?
of my characters who’s anything but gentle filled with a multitude of stories and personal
and inoffensive. experiences,’ he explains. ‘As I became close The idea is to encourage you to indulge in
But my writer’s mind started wandering, to many patients it was like reading stories a little free writing. As always, I advise you not
and before the others in my party had finished written to teach you life’s lessons.’ to choose a prompt but to take the one for
putting England’s shortcomings to rights, I had He started to write these ‘life lessons’ the week in question. If you need more, check
the outline of a two-part serial all mapped down, with no thought of publication, until out my blog, paulawilliamswriter.wordpress.
out in my head. How that 7000-word serial his wife and family encouraged him to do com where you’ll also find a lot more about
FICTION SQUARE
Murder Served Cold and its path towards
publication, not to mention pictures of my
gorgeous Dalmatian, Duke.
I recommend that once you have your
prompt, you start writing and – this is the
Roll a dice to find all the ingredients for your next story important thing – keep going. Don’t stop to
think, correct typos, read what you’ve just
– or use each of the squares as a daily prompt this month written or sit around waiting for inspiration.
If you’re stuck, then write just that: ‘I’m
Ist & 2nd roll 3rd & 4th roll 5th roll 6th roll 7th roll
stuck’, or ‘Who thought up all these silly
Characters Traits Weather Location Object
prompts?’ or even: ‘I don’t want to write
1 7 13 19 25 about — because —.’ It’s quite amazing how
Doctor Humble Sunny Bar Lawn mower often this gets you unstuck. It’s alchemy.
Finally, the weather again. Last month I wrote

2 8 15 20 26
Broken about keeping a weather log. This morning
Publican Gossiping Foggy Surgery when I walked the dog, it was one of those
window
beautiful days when the air was so fresh
3 9 15 21 27 ‘you could wash your face in it’, as one of my
Thunder- characters is fond of saying.
Child Hopeless Venice Doll
storm It made me realise what an impact the
weather has on our mood. Everyone was
4 10 16 22 28
smiling and happy to stop and chat, whereas
Five-star
Dog walker Thoughtful Rain Diary on a cold, wet morning, the dog walk is
hotel
something to be got over with as soon as
5 11 17 23 29 possible. So I’m reintroducing a weather
column in the Fiction Square. My challenge to
Ghost Brave Gales Party Magic carpet
you is to make the weather a pivotal part of
your next story. You could maybe use some
6 12 18 24 30 of last month’s weather log.
Gardener Distressed Blizzard Battleground Cuddly toy Do let me know how you got on. As
always, you are welcome to write to me at
ideastore@writers-forum.com
TRAVEL WRITING
TRAVEL WRITING PART ONE

Planning: home and away
Solange Hando begins a new series for the occasional travel writer
F
ull-time travel writer – best job in
the world? Yes, with a lot of hard
work and commitment. But if your
goal is to publish the occasional
travel feature as the opportunity arises,
well, anyone can do it.
So where’s your next holiday, your
next trip at home or abroad? And how
do you start?
Ready to go
Brochures, website, travel agent… all
booked? Brilliant, but a little research
before you leave will go a long way. How
could I have missed a naked dance and an
oyster festival while staying nearby?
Get a guide book, click on the web –
anything happening during your visit?
A fiesta, a holy day, a special ritual, an
annual fair? Note where and when. And
how about local transport, market days,
opening times of museums?
Whatever the country, some of your
best ideas will come from the local people.
But to gain their trust, you must respect
their culture. Learn about the dress code,
what you can or cannot do if invited into a
home, how to greet a Buddhist monk or a
town mayor. Are there any taboos, such as
offering gifts with the left hand or wearing
leather in a Hindu temple, and so on.
In tourist hotspots, people are likely to
speak English, but a few words in their is time‑consuming. A laptop is another
language will bring much excitement option, if you don’t mind carrying it. I
and maybe a chance to meet the family Taste the food, ride prefer a notepad to jot down words –
or attend a festival no one knows about. jasmine, glistening tiles, girl with palm leaf
‘Hello’, your name and where you come
the elephant, dance hat – and, of course, a smartphone would
from is often enough, but have a phrase with folks at festival do just as well.
book just in case. ‘Bus 36,’ I was told in When your feet won’t take you any
Thailand. No problem, but when I got to time. Join in… further, it’s time to relax and write up the
the station, I couldn’t read the script. Saved day’s report in a diary or, if possible, on
by schoolchildren… your laptop, where files can be saved on a
Locals should be happy to help but see what appeals to you. Content, pictures memory stick or in the cloud.
contacting a tourist office beforehand – it’s all part of the learning curve. What should you include? Well, what
is a good idea. You are a writer, coming you did, what you noticed, the people
to research an article on their town or Diary notes you met, impressions of colour and
country. Do they have any suggestions or Now you are there. With so much to see, smells, sounds of any kind… any idea that
a press pack, perhaps? Promise to drop so much to do, notes will be essential. But suddenly springs to mind.
by as soon as you arrive and hopefully you’ll want most of your time to explore Add as many details as possible, just
something will be ready for you. rather than write. How do you do it? in case you need them: names of rivers,
Finally, before you set off, browse a Audio‑recorders are discreet and villages or people who might pop up in a
few travel features by other writers and always to hand, but listening back later dialogue; the best way to travel; flowers,
PERFECT
for WRITING
pets, birds, trees… Have a quick look at
the local paper and cut out anything of
TRICKS OF THE TRADE RETREATS
interest. Record your own impressions of Keep an open mind
restaurants and hotels that you may decide Planning and research are important
to review. before you go but, once on location,
What should you leave out? Anything flexibility is the name of the game. Were
likely to be on a website or in a guidebook you going to visit a castle tomorrow but
(but make sure you double-check facts). you’ve been invited to a wedding up in
Lengthy information on posters and the hills? Well, the castle will always be
boards – just take a picture instead. Time is there but the wedding won’t, and I’m
precious; the more notes the better.
A word of warning. There are certain
sure you’ll guess which would better
attract the eye of a travel editor. So, The Mount
destinations where your luggage could be
searched so anything contentious is best
whatever comes your way, go for it.
Durlston, Swanage
kept in your mind. Get the right shot
Before taking pictures of people, I like
Meeting people a little time to make contact, smile,
Talking to locals is a great way to find chat, admire the beautiful baby. Then I
original ideas and this is what most editors ask: ‘Can I take a photo?’ No problem.
want. So start a conversation on the bus, in Likewise with a group, they pose and
the town square, speak to the hotel staff or I shoot. I don’t want that formal shot
as you wait in the ice cream queue. but when they relax, I click again and
That’s how I found a monkeys’ again. They liven up, giggle. Perfect.
swimming pool in Kathmandu – featured For close-ups or interviews, ask your
as a temple attraction – and a lepers’ subject to sign a model release giving
village in Vietnam, which provided four permission to print. Adapt a version off
articles. Always follow the unexpected. the internet and carry a few in your day
Take it a step further and join in when bag. If someone objects, don’t insist.
you can, as long as it is safe. I must admit
Large reception areas for group
I didn’t run through burning hay for a workshops and socialising
blessing in Bhutan but I wore the national what you will need and some markets
dress and everyone gathered round for insist on grabbing the rights; send off your
pictures. Taste the food, ride the elephant, only decent picture of the Taj Mahal and
dance with folks at festival time. Authentic you may have to wait months to use it
experience adds a lot to a travel feature. again, if ever.
Then you might think about interviews. What else is important? Variety. That
Travel writing is about people as well will allow you to approach several editors
as places and, whether local celebrities looking for different things. Some like
or common folk, human interest is in scenery with no one around, others like
demand. Many people have a story to tell, people, a bicycle, a flock of sheep. Then
so listen, lend a hand if appropriate and it there’s atmosphere, city life, humour,
could lead to your most original feature. drama and, most sought after, pictures
Likewise, talk to other travellers now that tell a story: the child with ‘no pants,
and then. Perhaps they’ve discovered no shoes’, the rickshaws rattling through Six bedrooms with twin or
something you don’t know: a quirky lodge, chaotic streets. Most editors like bright kingsize beds and writing desks
a spectacular viewpoint, or where to find colours and action shots.
an affordable but reliable guide. Exchange Major sights? Of course, take pictures
contacts in case you want to follow up. just like the postcards but also from
different angles, and wherever you are
On camera be ready to capture the unusual: a snake
Photographs are a must; some editors even ‘flying’ across the path, a bright-eyed
ask to see them before they commission. toddler licking their plate, or a funny sign:
A compact camera is fine, with the best Free wifi, pay toilets.
zoom and resolution you can afford. But One more thing: some editors might ask
make sure you respect the local rules. ‘No for a picture of you on location so make
photos, no flash’ means just that. Ignore it sure you can oblige.
and you could lose everything.
The midday light is often harsh so try to Next time
avoid it, but what about mist or pouring When you get back – travel markets and
rain? Some publications might like it but how to capture an editor’s attention. Surrounded by a private garden
my trick is to concentrate on close-up or and Purbeck’s inspirational scenery
interior shots until the sun comes out. • Solange Hando is the author of Be a Travel
How many images should you take? Writer, Live your Dreams, Sell your Features, To book The Mount for
The more the better, since you don’t know available on Amazon
your writing group, please visit
www.themountswanage.co.uk
or call 01929 424163
What am I writing? Notes

Enter brief notes about what you want to achieve TODAY Important dates
(or plan your work for TOMORROW if you prefer) and deadlines
Sun 1
Mon 2
Tue 3
Wed 4
Thu 5
Fri 6
Sat 7
Sun 8
Mon 9
Tue 10
Wed 11
Writers’ Forum #202 on sale
Thu 12
Fri 13
Sat 14
Fiction and poetry comps (rolling deadline)
Sun 15
Mon 16
Tue 17
Wed 18
Thu 19
Fri 20
– pin up this calendar and then use it to
keep track of your progress this month
Time to get serious about your writing
Sat 21
Sun 22
Mon 23
Tue 24
Wed 25
Thu 26
Fri 27
Sat 28
Sun 29
Flash comp #202
Mon 30
Tue 31
Writers FORUM
Pin up this
calendar and
then every
July 2018
morning add a
note about what
you are going to
write that day –
it really works!
ce
a l end ing. It’s just the pla
‘There is no re p the story.’
w here yo u sto
rt
Frank Herbe
Image: Tithi Luadthong

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Denis O’Driscoll Dr. Prem Kutowaroo
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Peter Dunbavan Mark Eaton
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SOTONYE SAGBE BOYLE Pat Eastwell
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STORY COMP
Writers FORUM
fictioncompetition
Congratulations to this month’s winners, Russell Day, Alexandria Thomson and Nigel Hall.
Do you have a short story that could impress our head judge Lorraine Mace?
Any subject, any style is welcome. Turn to the rules and entry form on page 39.
FIRST PRIZE £300
Keeping Score on
a Machete
Russell Day
I
was a late developer. Last in my class to read, last to shave. Last
in my crowd to lose his virginity. The only thing I did ahead
of time was have a mid-life crisis. That’s why I don’t talk about
the smell. When people talk about the Lock Down, they always
go on about the smell. The way it hung in the air and clung on to
clothes, how they can still smell it to this day.
My mid-life crisis came in the shape of karate lessons. Thirty‑five,
the beginnings of a paunch and a frightening number of hairs
sticking to the comb each morning. Topped off with a feeling that
the downhill roll of my life was gaining pace. Gym membership,
of the sort Rodger McCallan had, was beyond my price range. So, I Miller knew the smell. Standing next to him on a barricade one
bought into the blurb and signed up with a third dan black belt to time, I saw him tilt his head slightly and sniff. It was the late watch
get fit, improve confidence and learn self-defence. and almost dark, so I couldn’t see his expression. This would have
# been mid-November and by then we’d learned not to show lights.
For me, what evokes that first day of the Lock Down – running ‘One’s close.’
along the curve of the Thames, trying to get to a bridge before the The words were flat. For all the emotion in his voice he might
detonations started – isn’t the smell, it’s the car alarms. I know have been talking about boiling a kettle.
there were other sounds. All the sounds you’d expect with mass I listened but couldn’t hear anything. When I said as much, he
panic. Gunfire too; the army boys caught south of the river were as asked if I couldn’t smell it.
likely to fire on the living as the dead. It’s the car alarms that stick #
in my mind, though. Even now I sweat if I hear one. The karate class I joined was at the leisure centre. The poster
Most of the roads were impassable. The army and police had advertising it was dominated by a photograph of the instructor
road-blocked the major routes out of the city, but people kept high-kicking a punchbag. Five lessons in, I walked straight into
trying. As the side streets choked up, people abandoned their cars the same type of kick. They took me to hospital to have my nose
and ran. I guess setting the alarms was reflex, maybe some of them realigned and my consciousness level assessed.
thought they’d be coming back for them in a few days. We were There was a long, long wait in A&E and a remarkably swift
scared then, scared for our lives, but we didn’t know the scale of it. assessment. The hospitals were filling up. The nurses were grey
Think about that; we honestly thought if we got to a bridge before with fatigue. It was the week they began issuing the mortuary
it blew up, the army were going to let us cross. We thought that staff with handguns. A doctor told me that my attempts to get fit,
getting north of the river was going to make a difference. increase confidence and learn self-defence had, in fact, broken my
We didn’t know everywhere had gone south. ethmoid plate and probably severed my olfactory nerve, costing
So, people locked their cars and set the alarms. The cars didn’t me my sense of smell.
care what bumped into them, living or dead, they went off.
# Continued overleaf
STORY COMP
Keeping Score on a Machete continued

climb – but then you’d most likely end up with no place to go. If
they’d seen you, heard you … whatever … if they knew a live one
Rodger, in his executive’s suit and tie, laughed in that charming, was at the top of the stairs, they’d shuffle around for days. Others
matey way that requires you laugh along. He put on his sincere would get caught up in the pack. Eventually they’d move on. By
face to explain that I’d be given three weeks leave, to heal. This then there might be dozens of them, then they’d get channelled
would save the public being accosted on the street by someone into another pack.
looking like a failed prize fighter. Take on a pack and you don’t have time to keep score. You sure
He used his sympathetic voice to explain the leave would be as hell don’t worry about carving notches. I saw people doing
unpaid. that. The latecomers, the guys that came out of hiding once all the
# hard work had been done. By then there’d be ten of us going in
I told Miller about my ruined nose. He told me I wasn’t missing to deal with a dozen of the things. We’d clear a street, check the
much. It was a long speech by his standards and I was eager to buildings were empty. More than once I saw some muppet filing a
keep the conversation going. tally mark on the handle of an axe or a baseball bat.
Hero worship? Rodger had a machete with about twenty little vees cut along its
Maybe, though this was before the big turnaround. Before Miller back. Twenty. He was so proud.
was really Miller, if you get my meaning. But, yeah, even then you #
could tell there was something about him, so I wanted him to talk I met up with Miller early on. Really early on. Just after the explo-
to me. I asked him what the smell was like. sion on Tower Bridge. The roads were solid and so was the panic.
‘Ever used oil-based pastels, you know, like soft crayons?’ I People had started to run and that was never going to go well.
hadn’t, I didn’t have a clue what he was talking about, but I nodded Someone fell, others fell on them in turn. People got trampled. The
and said yes. ‘They smell like that, only worse.’ noise was enough to drive you mad. If a sound could be made by
Then I heard it, that funny brushing sound like someone a human being, then it was being made that day. Yelling, shouting.
sweeping a stair carpet. Swish, pause, swish, pause. One step at a Screaming and crying. I swear at one point I heard singing. And
time, dead limbs being dragged along. Miller was off the barricade all the while those car alarms.
and running to meet it before I’d picked up my axe. It took me a It didn’t make any difference. Run, scream or sing, there was
long time to get the hang of swinging an axe. nowhere to go.
I don’t know if he was armed that night, it was too dark to make There were helicopters with tannoys hovering all along the river.
out. The stories about him always fighting unarmed are rubbish. They kept repeating the same thing: stay calm and move away
Everyone carried weapons, you had to. But I did see him go hand- from the river, stay calm, there is no need for panic. I remember the
to-hand more than once. I think he did that night. message being cut off mid-stream and a klaxon sounding instead.
Later, I asked someone about the oil-based pastels. She said they It gave six long blasts then stopped. It’s strange, but it annoyed
smelled faintly of excrement. me that they gave six blasts. Something about that was disjointed
People’s bodies emptied in the end stages of the disease, bowels, somehow. Three blasts would have been fine, or maybe five, not
bladder, sinuses … boom, empty. I’ve heard stories about the first
victims speaking in tongues before they died, issuing prophesies
or calling the thousand names of God. Believe what you want, but
whatever they said, they said it from a puddle of crap. I didn’t think the movie was that
#
Before my face had healed, Rodger asked me to come into his
bad. I met the guy who played me
office. He explained the street-based, donation-canvassing format at the premiere
was currently insufficiently productive. I was going to cost more
to keep than I was going to bring in. The population were going
out less. When they did, they wore surgical masks if they could get six. Then a new message: Demolition of the bridges will take place in
them, a scarf across their face if not. No one wanted you getting sixty seconds, if you have not cleared the bridges do so now. Then the
close and no one wanted to talk about strangers in need or hear countdown.
how their monthly donation would make such a difference. The bridge was heaving. Nobody could have got off it in a minute.
It’s possible I was one of the last people in Europe to be given I saw at least one person jump over the side, whether they were
a formal period of notice. Which makes Rodger one of the last trying to escape the explosion or the crush of bodies, I couldn’t say.
men in Europe to fire somebody. He did it well, of course; there’d When the countdown ended, and there was no explosion, some
been a lot of chances to hone that particular skill. Anyway, he people cheered. I might have been one of them. For a moment, there
was a natural. was a faint hope that the Lock Down had been cancelled. Then the
# other bridges went. The sound rumbled along the Thames and the
I don’t know how many I killed. The first of us, the first to fight, dust cloud that had been London Bridge appeared to the west just
didn’t keep score. There wasn’t time. After the army withdrew – before Tower Bridge erupted.
and no one would work in the hospitals any more – the first packs I saw the film the Yanks made about Miller last year. They got
started to appear. A lot of people think they had some kind of the explosion wrong. In the movie it goes up like a firework. It
instinct that drew them together, but I’ve never bought into that was nothing like that. Someone in the Royal Engineers fouled up.
idea. When the charges went, they only took a chunk out of one of the
The lowest estimates say thirty-six percent of Western Europe supports. It did the job, except the bridge didn’t blow, it folded. It
died in the first year of the outbreak. If the figures were the same was slow. People started jumping en masse.
for London, that’s a lot of dead bodies to deal with. There were a Yes, I watched the film. I got a letter from the actor who played
lot of barricades and road blocks thrown up, a lot of fires too. the lead. He wanted to meet me, get some texture for Miller. We
People, living and dead, ended up being channelled. You could spoke on the phone for about an hour but he obviously didn’t listen.
get out of the way by climbing a staircase or two – they couldn’t Miller didn’t make speeches and he sure as hell never prayed. Yeah,
STORY COMP
Writers FORUM
Want to see YOUR story published?
I’ve heard the stories about him being a priest, and a rabbi, and an
imam. Everyone’s trying to claim him as one of theirs. I’ve been Three great prizes every issue
told he was English, Irish, Scottish. Even the Chinese are saying
he was one of them.
1st £300 2nd £150 3rd £100
I didn’t think the movie was that bad. I met the guy who played All types of story are welcome, be it crime, comedy, history,
me at the premiere. He seemed to think I’d have some sort of fit romance, horror, sci-fi… but THEY MUST BE ENTERTAINING/
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your wits. I saw as many people trampled to death as I did bitten.
Name
I was lucky, I’d been pushed into some sort of recess. It was
the size of a doorway but ended in a wall. Quirky old London Address
building. Me and this shortish man who turned out to be Miller.
The doorway, which wasn’t a doorway, was close to a corner and Postcode
the way the crowds were moving meant we had some kind of
Email address
protection. Like a rock in a river, the water flows around it and
leaves a patch just behind that’s almost calm. We were like that. Phone number
Not that I was calm, but I avoided the worst of the current.
# Story title
The guy who played Rodger in the film? Yeah, spooky, could
Length words
have been his twin. There were a lot of photographs of him to work
from. His flat had survived pretty much intact. He’d lived in some I declare the story has not previously been published or
fairly upmarket complex. I can’t remember where exactly, but broadcast and that it is my own work
whenever he mentioned it he’d say it was close to central London.
I know it was expensive. The production office for the film company ENTRY FEE: £6 (non-subscriber) £3 (subscriber)
bought it outright. Part of the deal was having the bottom three Subscribe below and take advantage of our special entry fees
floors cleared. That was how a lot of towers escaped being picked – you can also subscribe online at www.writers-forum.com
clean. High death count inside. A warehouse or a supermarket OPTIONAL: Please enrol me for an annual subscription
was worth the effort, but no one wanted to fight through fifty £38 UK £49 Europe £56 Rest of world
ex-residents for a jar of olives and a bottle of wine.
Rodger was one of the hiders. That’s not a put-down; most FEEDBACK: I would like a story critique from the judges and
people hid. I would have if I hadn’t met Miller. Nearly everyone include a large stamped addressed envelope plus the fee of £5
tried to find a safe place. They’d duck out to grab supplies, avoid
trouble and get home. Miller never did that. The day the bridge TOTAL amount payable £
blew he waited for them.
Yeah, I stayed with him. The crowd sorted itself out and worked I enclose a cheque My credit-card details are below
out which way to run. The press of people against our little faux
doorway thinned after a while, then slowed. Then changed. It Visa/Mastercard/Maestro (delete) Total £
stopped being people running away and it became people trying
Card no
to run away. Then people fighting, falling, dying.
Three people pressed into our space, two women and a man Expiry date Valid from (if shown)
who’d already been bitten. He was still struggling, holding one
of them by the neck and punching it in the face. It had been an Issue no (if shown) Security no (last 3 digits)
elderly woman; if she’d still been alive he’d have killed her ten
Signature
Continued overleaf I am happy for my story to be consideredContinued
for a freeoverleaf
fiction
workshop and to be featured in Writers’ Forum (optional)
STORY COMP
Keeping Score on a Machete continued

the government got on top of things and rounded the last of them
up, Miller had nothing left to kill.
times over. It was the first time I’d seen any of them up close. I think Me and Rodger. That was mostly Hollywood, too. We weren’t
I started crying, then Miller grabbed me and said: ‘Come on.’ ‘buddies’ and I didn’t freeze-frame open-mouthed and wide-eyed
We started fighting. when he died.
# What’s the phrase, friendly fire? It happened a lot, more in the
No. A lot of people talk that way, but I don’t think Miller saw it early days, in the bigger fights. Ten, twenty people hyped up,
as a war. A lot of people who followed him thought about it like hammers and axes going. Sometimes you’d hit the wrong target,
that, but not him. He just went out looking for them. He wanted the wrong head.
to kill them, that was all. He hated them. We all did, but for him Yeah, Rodger was one of the last to die. Wrong place, wrong
it was different; somehow it was personal for him. I could see it in time. In the film, they showed him and me fighting impossible
the way he went after them. I followed him from that day by the odds, waiting for Miller to come and save us. A split second before
bridge. he gets there I take a desperate swing to save Rodger and put my
Right-hand man? Not really. I was just there all the time. It was axe through his head.
the first time I’d been part of the ‘in-crowd’, you know? End of Noble warrior felled in battle by his brother-in-arms.
the world, but at least I was one of the cool kids. Now it’s over, it Tragic, tragic accident.
doesn’t seem important. Not now he’s dead. The movie got a lot of things wrong.
Rodger made a beeline for Miller, of course. He spotted the
in-crowd at fifty paces, once he’d come out of hiding. They made
a lot out of the friendship in the movie, more than was there.
Rodger still clung to the image of me as the office underling and About the author Russell lives in London with his wife
Miller wasn’t anybody’s friend, really. He lived to vent his hate. and two children. He is currently working to expand this story
That’s why he killed himself. The film boys got that wrong, too. into a novel. His first novel, Needle Song, is available from
All that soul-searching and malarkey about lost comrades. Once Fahrenheit Press.
SECOND PRIZE £150
The Violin to his Drum

Alexandria Thomson
T
he dirge of the pipes blanketed the hillside, mirroring the
drumbeat in Chrisandor’s aching heart.
You’re not a sissy, are you, boy? His father’s last words to
him carved through his mind, cutting deeper than any
knife.
N-no, Father. He hadn’t meant to cry, but he’d fallen so fast, and
his arm had burnt like fire.
He swallowed a sob and forced tiny, staccato breaths past the
invisible chains crushing his chest.
It’d been his own fault. He’d known better than to climb into
the loft unsupervised. And his father had already been late for
work. He always said things he didn’t mean when he got angry.
You’re not a sissy, are you, boy?
Chrisandor stared at his mother, resplendent in her funeral Chrisandor jumped and dragged his gaze from the shrinking
white, and squeezed her fingers. Her hand engulfed his as she pyre. His mother frowned at him, her eyes red-rimmed and glis-
returned the gesture. tening. A man stood beside her. Tall. Broad. Grim-faced. A stranger.
The pipes fell silent. So many strangers.
The godsman emerged from the ring of mourners and pushed a ‘Yes, Ma?’
torch into the pyre. ‘This is Master Findale. He runs the lumber yard where your
N-no, Father. father worked.’
Wood snapped and fire crackled, singing of need and hunger. ‘It’s a pleasure to meet you, Master Findale.’ Chrisandor
Wind blasted the hillside with the ferocity of a man’s dying breath, bowed, bringing his eyes level with the man’s hands. Big hands.
and flames leapt skyward, roaring his agony with every snap, pop Dirt‑stained, cracked and calloused. ‘Like Father’s.’
and hiss. The man frowned. ‘I beg your pardon?’
You’re not a sissy, are you, boy? ‘Your hands. They’re like Father’s.’
The pall encasing his father’s body warped and blackened in the ‘Ah.’ The man extended his hands and flipped them to reveal the
centre of the fire. creases crisscrossing his palms. ‘A worker’s hands. Just like yours
…not a sissy… will be if you accept my offer.’
…not a sissy… Chrisandor craned his head. ‘Ma?’
‘Chrisandor?’ ‘Master Findale has an opening for an apprentice at the yard.
STORY COMP
He’s offered to take you on.’ pristine white tunic and black waistcoat. His eldest apprentice,
‘Me?’ Chrisandor looked at those hands again. Those coarse, Errol, stood near the window, holding a viola for a young woman’s
insensitive, unfeeling hands. ‘But –’ inspection. Chrisandor swallowed, dodged the closing door, and
‘You don’t have to answer.’ The man glanced at the pyre. ‘Not wiped his feet on the doormat.
today. But I will need your decision soon. It pays well. A round ‘Young Chrisandor,’ Master Bryant said, his voice filling the
a week. And I know your mother could use the coin, with your shop with warm, rolling tones. ‘I hadn’t expected to see you today
father passed.’ of all days.’
‘Sir.’ As if by cue, the apprentice and his client turned back to each
‘Goodwoman Dylis. Master Chrisandor. I’ll leave you to your other and resumed their whispered conversation.
grief.’ The man dipped his head and departed. ‘N-no, sir, but I –’ Chrisandor took a deep breath, throwing off
Smoke gathered over the pyre like a shroud, carrying with it the chains threatening to silence him, and stretched to his full
the stink of wood, cloth and burnt flesh. Chrisandor sneezed and height, though it brought the top of his head no higher than Master
retreated from the heat. Bryant’s robust belly. ‘I have a request, sir.’
More mourners approached after Master Findale, to pay their ‘A request?’ Master Bryant stepped out from behind the counter
respects to his Ma and commiserate the loss of a friend. She didn’t and invited Chrisandor forward with a curled wave of his hand.
notice when he freed his hand from hers. Nor when he escaped to ‘What sort of request?’
seek fresh air. Chrisandor stole a surreptitious look at the viola’s sumptuous
Soft grass gave way to hard dirt. He stumbled, staggered, and curves as he shuffled into the shop. Then his gaze jumped to the
regained his balance at the edge of the path. drums and cymbals. The grand harp. The pianoforte. ‘I –’ He
A lumberjack.
His mother wanted him to be a lumberjack.
After all her promises; all her smiles and laughter when he’d told You must feel it, too.The music.
her of his dreams.
A lumberjack, when he lacked the strength to swing an axe.
The rhythm. Every day, all around us.
He continued to backpedal, tripping over unseen divots and People walking… their conversations
bumps, until he could look down on the dark shadow within
the flames and the mourners circling it like two-legged, bleating
sheep. stopped in front of Master Bryant and tilted his head to look him
‘Goodbye, Father.’ in the eye. ‘I want to be your apprentice, sir. Please.’
Chrisandor turned and ran, needing to escape the smell. The ‘Ah, Chrisandor.’ Master Bryant clapped his hand to Chrisandor’s
platitudes. The fake smiles on unknown faces. shoulder. ‘I know you’re fascinated by what we do here, but you
A lumberjack. know my situation. I already have a full complement of appren-
The exertion drove the tightness from his lungs, loosening the tices. Until Errol earns his journeyman’s ribbon, I can’t afford – ’
snot lodged in his nose and throat. ‘But…’
You’re not a sissy, are you, boy? Lumberjack, lumberjack, lumberjack.
No. You’re not a sissy, are you, boy?
No, he wasn’t. N-no, Father.
And he wasn’t afraid of hard work either, but… ‘But I need to. You must feel it, too. The music. The rhythm.
A lumberjack? Every day, all around us. People walking in the street.’ He ran to
His life would become a monotony of sawing, chopping and a drum and beat his palms on the skin at a steady tempo. ‘And
hauling. The same rhythm played over and over. Droning. Dreary. others running.’ He beat the drum faster. ‘Their conversations.’
Without hope. He softened his blows and played a near-continuous roll. ‘Their
He burst over the crest of the hill and through the open town shouts.’ He ended the roll with a palm-stinging slap. ‘Alone, each
gate. A herd of pigs blocked the main road, the chaotic melody of sound is weak, but together… together they create the… the…’
their oinks and snorts a perfect mirror to the confusion chiming ‘Harmony?’ Master Bryant asked with a lopsided smile.
inside him. The swineherd’s whip cracked, a snap of authority ‘Yes. Harmony. Together they create Fourtrees Crossing’s
demanding attention, seeking control as a conductor would with harmony. And then…’ Chrisandor glanced at Errol and the young
a baton. woman, who’d broken off their conversation to listen. ‘Then there’s
Like my father when he shouts. the weather. Like the rain.’ He abandoned the drum in favour of
You’re not a sissy, are you, boy? the pianoforte and tapped out a tippy-tappy rhythm on the final
Chrisandor flinched and darted into the maze of back-alleys that two keys. ‘And the storms.’ He shimmied to the other end of the
would take him home. He reached the first junction and stopped, keyboard and banged out a discordant counter-melody. ‘And then
doubled over and panting. there are the animals, like the birds.’ He turned from the piano-
Home? forte, dashed across the room, and reached for the viola in Errol’s
Home was darkness and despair. A hunkered hovel heavy in its hand. ‘Um…’
silence. An empty shell without a soul. Errol laughed and turned the instrument to rest its foot against
The dingy alley loomed ahead of him, a descent into a pit of his shoulder. ‘Like this?’ He lifted the bow to the strings and
shadow waiting to swallow him whole. He stared down its length played a quick, high-pitched ditty.
for a count of ten, then fled in the opposite direction. ‘Yes. Yes. You see. You all see.’ He spun in a circle, hand extended
to point at each member of his audience in turn. ‘Music is every-
Bells jangled, hinges creaked, and conversation died when where. In my heartbeat.’ He tapped his chest. ‘In your laughter.’
Chrisandor opened the door to Bryant’s Music Store. The shop’s He pointed to Errol. ‘And even in your breath.’ He finished with a
three occupants turned to watch him.
Master Bryant stood behind the counter, looking dapper in a Continued overleaf
STORY COMP
The Violin to his Drum continued

Chrisandor swallowed the lump in his throat. ‘You mean it?’
‘Come on through the back. You may as well make a start. Errol,
flourish that brought him face-to-face with Master Bryant. ‘I need watch the shop for me.’
this, Master Bryant. Please. It’s here.’ He thumped his chest again. ‘Yes, Master Bryant.’
‘It’s part of me.’
Master Bryant frowned, turning his normally warm face cloudy. The stench of horse glue turned Chrisandor’s stomach, and its
‘You realise a musician’s apprenticeship isn’t easy, lad? It’s not all thick vapours clogged his lungs. He sniffed to clear the snot from
playing, and laughing, and fun.’ his nostrils and continued to stir the pot, timing each stroke to the
Chrisandor clasped his hands behind his back and adopted the beat of the metronome, nodding with each completed revolution,
most serious expression he could muster. ‘I know, sir.’ determined not to fail in this, his first assigned task.
‘And if you think you can waltz in here, piddle about, collect You’re not a sissy, are you, boy?
your wage at the end of the month, and then fritter it away come N-no, Father.
Mournday, you’ve a sharp shock coming.’ But I’m not you either. I’m like a violin to your drum. I need to follow
‘But I don’t think that, sir. And I don’t want the wage for myself. my own rhythm. Chrisandor bowed his head, released the tension
I want you to give it to my Ma. She needs it, now Father… now that had gripped him since his father’s death, and wept.
he’s…’
‘Aye, lad.’ Master Bryant grasped Chrisandor’s upper arm and
squeezed. ‘I know. But you’ll take a round or two for yourself, About the author Alexandria is an avid writer and reader
regardless. I won’t have people saying I don’t treat my apprentices of all things fantasy. She is currently working on her Andistalkern
right. A trial, then. You work hard and stick it out ’til the end of Sequence series and aims to self-publish the first book, The
the month, and I’ll take you on full time.’ Spymaster and The Rake, by the end of the year.
THIRD PRIZE £100
Stopping the Gush

Nigel Hall
Contains some strong language
D
o you watch those African nature documentaries? The
ones where they show the dry river bed suddenly filling
with water? It’s quite remarkable. It comes from nowhere.
And the gush of it all. One minute the ground is cracked
and raw, like a blister that won’t heel, and the next… you can
almost hear the eager, brown-tipped bull-rushes sprouting back.
Well, that’s what it felt like when I dropped the knife, when it
dawned on me what I’d done. Finally, all the rawness inside of me
was over.’
I stop at this point.
The interviewing officer – a dowdy specimen with the begin-
ning of a boozer’s nose; a purplish tint at the tip; a bruise almost ‘Adam Kramer,’ I say, trying to catch a glimpse of the scrawl
– nods now, scribbles something on her spiral pad, and then that’s on there. ‘The artist whose exhibition it was this evening.’
suggests: ‘Can we go back a bit, Veronica? Tell me more about what ‘Why did you want to hurt him, Veronica?’
happened tonight.’ Suddenly, I feel like slamming both fists down on to that fucking
Her eyes seem quite genuine. I know from watching Columbo desk, standing up and screaming: BECAUSE OF SARAH!
re-runs on the Freeview, it’s a tactic they employ to make you But I refuse to unravel. Instead, I look down at the heels that I’d
open up. Not that she needs to try to impress me with her amateur polished especially, and smile quietly inside as I replay the even-
dramatics. I’m as keen as custard. ing’s crescendo: that soundless slice of the blade; Adam Kramer’s
I swallow, lift my head up and say: ‘I just stood. I couldn’t move. I screams, his arms splaying out like arms on an octopus as he tries
must have been the only one in that art gallery that wasn’t moving, to stop me; then him crumbling to his knees before his paintings.
or screaming. But it’s important you understand that it was never Thinking back now, it was almost biblical.
my intention to scare. Please…’ I reach my hand across and feel ‘I’ll tell you why I wanted to hurt him,’ I say, looking at her now,
offended when she draws hers back slightly. ‘You will tell people, fixing her in my stare and resisting the urge to blink. ‘Because
and apologise from me for spoiling their evening. I only wanted Adam Kramer is a very bad man.’
to hurt him.’
Her eyes tighten and any kindness has gone now. Then, she When Sarah finally started to open up about the abuse Kramer
leans right forwards, like she’s examining a minor dent on her car, had inflicted, I was sure that the rawness was over then. I thought
and says: ‘Him?’ that all the anger would fade, like spring snow on a rooftop.
She begins to drag her pen back and forth along the spiral of her At the Starbucks on the corner, she poured her heart out. As she
pad. She does this again and again. Another tactic? played with the cardboard rim of her hot chocolate, and while I
STORY COMP
watched the thin dribbles of rain trick-tracking down the window ‘I’ll have a word,’ I said, dumbstruck.
panes, I insisted she tell me everything. Her teacher sighed. ‘No, I meant look at what she’s drawn here.’
‘Don’t hide anything from me again. I’ll know if you are. I’m She pointed down, allowing her finger to trail the page’s lines to
your mother, remember.’ the bottom left-hand corner. ‘See?’
Her eyes wide, she muttered: ‘If you’re sure.’ She paused, and I could see her eyes watching mine so carefully.
For the next forty minutes, I listened, almost awestruck, to her ‘Did you know, hands are incredibly difficult to draw?’ she said.
describe how, in the space of one semester, Kramer had progressed ‘Even Da Vinci struggled.’
from fledgling nods of acknowledgement in the college corridors
to sordid scuffles in lorry-driver laybys. ‘There’s this really cool tutor,’ Sarah said to me over the phone,
With each raw revelation, Sarah seemed to grow, though. The the first Sunday after I’d dropped her off at the halls. ‘He’s incred-
slouched shoulders I’d seen when I’d first arrived were lifting, as if ible. His body…’
the burden of that shadow, which had been leaning on her for such ‘His body?’
a long time, was slowly dissipating. ‘His body of work, I meant. It’s mesmerising. He’s been exhibited
It wasn’t easy hearing it, and there was still so much I wanted all over the world.’
to know. Several times, as she gripped her cup and described He was all she could talk about that first semester. On many
what had gone on, I felt like hurling my coffee across the shop and occasions during our weekly telephone calls, I’d be forced to inter-
screaming his name for all to hear, but I kept quiet. ject. ‘Do you know what I had for Sunday lunch today, Sarah?
No mother wants to hear about their daughter’s suffering at the Because you’ve not bothered to ask. Beans on toast.’
hands of a man of his stature, but it was important for her to realise Then, all of a sudden, and just like that Savile chap, there was
that she mustn’t hide anything from me. I was there for her, like barely a mention of him. He became a secret; ever present but never
she’s always been there for me. there. When I did ask, she always batted the question away. But I
was relieved. I suspected that this fair-weather crush – Kramer
When she was small, she was always drawing, always had a perhaps being the college equivalent of a high school sports’ coach
pencil clasped in her hand. In the beginning, I think it was therapy
for her. Well, it stopped the bed-wetting, mostly.
‘Make Mummy a picture,’ I’d say, while folding all the washing
into tidy rectangles.
Staring at that picture of him
A lot of what she conjured up, I couldn’t bear to look at. I staring back at me, all I could think
remember one particular time, when she’d drawn yet another
picture of her father, I snapped, like the lead in one of her pencils. of was Sarah’s father
I took her outside.
‘Tidy up those dolls,’ I instructed, not caring whether the neigh-
bours heard this time or not. ‘They’ll get ruined in all this rain.’ – had run its course. From now on, she would be fully focused on
Afterwards, when I’d brought her back in and we’d calmed her art. I never thought for one moment that…
down, I sat her on my knee, brushed back her hair and asked her The first time I saw him was on the internet. I Googled him.
why she kept scribbling pictures of things she knew made us sad. Before then, I’d imagined a young stallion – pert pecs blossoming
I said: ‘Can you not draw a lion or a tiger, like all other children, thanks to self-serving gym sessions; a wave of dark hair trailing
instead of that dickhead?’ down beyond a tanned neck line. Perhaps a sleeve of tattoos made
She looked at me, with those big bulging eyes of hers and just up of meaningless symbols obtained from time spent in Thailand
shrugged. or another equally primitive country.
How wrong I was. There was hair, yes, but just coarse strands,
The way she keeps tapping her pen on her pad is quite annoying. and all clumsily arranged in a pathetic attempt to conceal a
‘Veronica, where did you get the knife?’ wasteland of a bald patch; there were cracked, nicotine-stained
‘From my kitchen, of course,’ I answer sharply. ‘It’s part of a set.’ fingertips with overly long fingernails; a flurry of lines dug deep
‘I see.’ A short, sharp scribble on the pad. ‘And you got to the into a heavy, weather-worn brow.
gallery by…?’ Cool? Really, Sarah?
‘By bus. The 32 stops more or less right outside. I was going to He looked like he needed storing in the vaults of a decaying
get the bus back as well but… well, I’m here, aren’t I!’ museum, not placing on a pedestal.
She arches one eyebrow, as if she’s examining scrolling lines of Staring at that picture of him staring – almost blithely – back at
static on a telly, trying to work out what the programme under- me, all I could think of was Sarah’s father.
neath might be. Then, she scribbles some more.
‘Are you drawing something?’ I ask, watching those hands of There’d been several squabbles about her moving into halls
hers closely. when she started the course, especially considering the college
commute was barely thirty-five minutes.
‘Please, look,’ one of Sarah’s primary school teachers said to me ‘I want to?’
once, offering me her exercise book. ‘Why?’
I licked my finger and flicked through the pages. ‘Well, she’s still ‘I just want to.’
getting the letter S the wrong way round,’ I said. ‘Don’t you like living with me any more?’ I remember saying,
The teacher smiled, rather stiffly I thought, and said: ‘No, have a wiping the draining board down. ‘Drinking. Boys. You’re there to
look at what she’s drawn.’ learn, Sarah, not cavort.’
Much of it was difficult to decipher, as if the dribbles of ink had I relented in the end. Looking back, I wish I hadn’t. ‘Do what
been impossible to control. On one page, she’d coloured all of the you like,’ I remember saying, throwing down the dishcloth and
margin in black, going over and over it until, in parts, you could
see the paper was close to tearing. But then there were other bits… Continued overleaf
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STORY COMP
Stopping the Gush continued

haired specimens – women – who were (according to their
high-and-mighty lanyards) from Student Services.
storming out. ‘And empty that pedal bin. It’s stinking the house ‘Well, where is he?’ I demanded, pushing away their hands and
out.’ wiping my mouth.
‘Adam Kramer resigned at Christmas,’ the one with the wonky
It was partway through that second semester that she stopped fringe explained, as the other stood tapping on her phone.
by and said she had something to tell me. ‘Left before he was pushed, eh? What’s being done about it?
‘What?’ I asked, staring at her fiddling with the creases in her That’s what I want to know.’
skirt like they were a line of marching ants. ‘You were quiet all I refused their offer of tea, and eventually someone else saun-
over Christmas. Tell me. I’m your mother.’ tered in – a dwarf of a man. He took a deep breath and fiddled
That’s when she began to get upset. She said that she was scared uncomfortably with the grey strands that were nestled within his
to. Her nose started running, like it used to when she was a child. tangled beard.
Now, I’ve never had much patience where tears are concerned, He said: ‘Adam has always been very clear he didn’t want to
and it was all I could do to stop myself from telling her to get a compromise his position. Whilst we don’t approve of student–
dammed tissue. But this time, I could see there was something. tutor relationships, your daughter is an adult, so…’
The way she kept rocking backwards and forwards, looking As he trailed off, he cocked his head to one side and half-smiled,
towards me from the very nooks of her eyes, but then quickly as if waiting for me to join all the dots.
looking down again so that all her hair fell down across her face. ‘But she’s my daughter,’ I screamed. ‘She’s all I’ve got.’
I don’t know what made me ask the question. Perhaps a mother Still, by the time they were escorting me outside, a germ of an
knows; a sixth sense so to speak. On those nature programmes, idea was already forming.
when there’s a whole heard of gazelles, they say the mothers
can tell which baby is theirs by smell. Perhaps that’s what it was. The leaves on the officer’s pad, the tops ones, are starting to curl
Perhaps I could smell the shame on her. slightly now.
I put my hand beneath her chin, forced her to look up and asked: ‘Talk me through what happened at the gallery, Veronica,’ she
‘Has this got something to do with that Adam Kramer?’ says.
When she nodded, I almost died. ‘Well, I walked in, cool as a cucumber so I wouldn’t arouse
suspicion, and asked the girl on the desk where Room Two was. I’d
I’ve always been a light sleeper, but after it all came out I found seen the poster for it in the college earlier. A Retrospective by Adam
it impossible to sleep more than two hours in succession. Laid in Kramer it said in big, bold lettering. It was pinned to the notice-
bed, I’d find myself staring up at the ceiling. I’d think all sorts. And board, next to a card advertising a box room for rent.
not just at night, because like all unsolicited visitors, images and Resigned indeed.
scenarios of a certain salubrious nature appear without warning. ‘Even before I’d stepped through the gallery’s large oak doors,
Sometimes, I’d be out shopping, casually dropping a box of and though there were all those people – sipping wine, nibbling
at the canapes – I spotted him. He was standing in front of one
particular painting that was all squiggles, like the kind Sarah used
to doodle in her exercise books. He looked so pleased with himself
Sometimes I’d sit for hours with surrounded by his foot soldiers, like he’d just got five lottery
this rawness seething inside, my numbers and was waiting for the sixth.’
‘Then what?’ she says, her voice almost a whisper.
tears streaming like a tap ‘He stiffened when he saw me. Strange. We’d never met, but he
knew. Naturally, he persevered with his small talk, but just like the
animal that he is, I could see him subtly searching for a way out.’
detergent into the basket, when an image of Adam Kramer’s with- I take a breath and she leans right forwards. ‘Go on, Veronica.’
ered lips pressed against the bowl of Sarah’s breast would slam ‘My heart was pounding. And a voice, almost childlike, was
hard into me. Another time, while towelling myself down after a saying: Don’t. You’ll spoil their night. But, I had to. So, I pulled the
mid-morning shower, I pictured his slightly-sagging middle-aged knife from my handbag and ran straight for him. Now, I’ve never
paunch pressing hard into the small of her firm, unblemished been very stable, not in heels, and even though he was waving
back. his arms, pleading with me to stop, I didn’t. I couldn’t. Do you
Yes, for some considerable time, I thought I might actually be remember that gushing river I was telling you about? Well, at that
going mad. precise moment I was that river. I lifted my hand, right up, and
For weeks, I didn’t know what steps to take. Sometimes I’d sit for stabbed it straight into the canvas.
hours with this rawness seething inside, my own tears streaming ‘“That’s a warning; for fucking my daughter,“ I said as he
like a tap. dropped to his knees and screamed.’
Sarah begged me not to do anything that might cause upset to
her studies. We fell out over it and she started avoiding my calls. The officer says: ‘We’ve spoken with Sarah. She told us she’s tried
Then, when I was watching that programme about the dry to patch things up with you several times. There was a meeting in
season in Mozambique, I realised that the drought only stops when Starbucks. Is that right?’
the rain arrives. So, I fetched my coat and went straight out. I nod.
When I got to the college, I started shouting ‘Where is the For a while, she doesn’t say anything else, but I can feel her eyes
filthy fucking pervert?’ to anyone who happened to glance in my going over every bit of me, like she’s trying to spot a fraying thread
direction. she can tug.
Eventually, after barn-storming several rooms and being ‘And how was that?’
confronted with only a myriad of gormless stares from several
sophomores, I was ushered into a room by two grouchy short- Continued overleaf
STORY COMP
I
Stopping the Gush continued
need to open this column interactions have affected the
with a confession. Zombie narrator. As he talks about
‘Fine.’ stories are probably my least the Hollywood portrayal of
‘Only, Sarah says you were subdued, that you hardly said a favourite reading material, his life and those of Miller
word. Sarah wants you to try and understand she’s very happy which means the winning and Rodger, he recalls how
with Adam. However…’ entry had to overcome not the film depicted the final
If she looks down at that pad one more time. only all the other strong battle where Rodger fell – and
‘… at that meeting, I understand the staff asked you to leave after contenders for the top slot, then we are hit with the truth.
you threw a cup at the window. Is that right, Veronica?’ but also my inbuilt prejudice.
This says a great deal Tragic, tragic accident.
I’ve been released on bail to return on such and such a date. about Russell Day’s powerful The movie got a lot of things
As I was leaving I asked: ‘Can I have my knife back? It’s part of writing in Keeping Score on wrong.
a set.’ a Machete. Yes, there are
Do you know, it was only in that very last second that I decided zombies, but they are not the An excellent ending to an
not to ram the blade into Adam Kramer’s neck. The reason I stars of the piece. They are extremely well told story.
T
deferred was because, seeing him standing there, proud as punch the reason the narrator has a
in front of his squiggles, I realised I would hurt him more by tale to tell. This isn’t a horror he Violin to his Drum
sticking it into his poxy painting. Recalling that long, anguished story as such, but it is chilling by Alexandria
wail he made as the canvas tore, I know I was right. in every way. The structure Thomson opens by
Well, I think I was. of moving from present day putting the reader at
to the past, and then even the graveside of a boy’s father.
I used to like that David Attenborough but, do you know, I’ve further back before returning The relationship between the
gone right off him of late. Perhaps it’s something to do with the to the present, works well. two is reflected in the music.
HD. Well, you can see every little line on his face. It opens with a great hook:
She rang last week, Sarah. ‘Mum,’ she said. ‘Let’s stop all this The dirge of the pipes
nonsense. Adam is prepared to try to build bridges. For me. That’s why I don’t talk about blanketed the hillside, mirroring
Besides, we’re confident the painting can be repaired.’ the smell. When people talk the drumbeat in Chrisandor’s
She’s suggested dinner, this Sunday in town. Neutral ground. about the Lock Down, they aching heart.
All the trimmings. always go on about the smell. You’re not a sissy, are you,
I said I might. Well, I’m sick of beans on toast. And besides, she boy? His father’s last words to
does have a point. On reflection, this nonsense does need to stop. I like the way Russell him carved through his mind,
Once and for all. doesn’t feel the need to cutting deeper than any knife.
explain about the Lock Down
or the smell yet. The strength The writing is lyrical and
of the writing ensures readers expressive, making it easy
About the author Nigel started writing three years ago. will follow where he leads. to visualise both scene and
His stories have appeared in magazines and anthologies. This mood. At the graveside,
year he has been shortlisted in the Bedford International and We were scared then, scared when the funeral pyre is lit,
Evesham Festival of Words writing competitions. for our lives, but we didn’t know Alexandria uses fabulous
the scale of it. Think about that; imagery to paint the picture.
we honestly thought if we got to a
bridge before it blew up, the army Wood snapped and fire
were going to let us cross. We crackled, singing of need and
thought getting north of the river hunger. Wind blasted the hillside
was going to make a difference. with the ferocity of a man’s dying
breath, and flames leapt skyward,
Russell introduces the roaring his agony with every
narrator’s nemesis, Rodger, in snap, pop and hiss.
such a way that readers are
not immediately aware of his Later, when Chrisandor has
significance, but his character fled the funeral and rushes
Highly commended is clearly shown by words towards home, Alexandria
There were nine other shortlisted stories this month: and actions: He used his once again effortlessly shows
sympathetic voice to explain the us his confusion and panic.
Blueberry Jam by Philip Stern leave would be unpaid. And
Bob the Biobot by Pete Pitman later: I was going to cost more to He burst over the hill and
The Absofruit Truth by Dave Traer keep than I was going to bring in. through the open town gate. A
Lone Wolf by Denise Saunders On Rodger’s aptitude for herd of pigs blocked the main road,
Closure by Ryan Coull firing employees: He did it the chaotic melody of their oinks
This Woman’s Right by Robert Kibble well, of course; there’d been a lot and snorts a perfect mirror to the
Without a Crown by Shane Hulgraine of chances to hone that particular confusion chiming inside him.
On Camera by Mary Bevan skill. Anyway, he was a natural.
The Going Nowhere Roads by Maire Malone It is only at the end that These two sections are
we realise how much these almost a masterclass in
STORY COMP
Competition round-up
A trio of strong titles
Lorraine Mace explains why she chose this month’s winners
A good title
All three winners this month
have titles that fit their
respective stories and are
unusual enough to make the
reader take notice. A good
title will hint at the story to
come, but a great one points
to the main conflict.
■ Try for a word or phrase

that sums up the theme, or
use a memorable and apt line
from the story itself
■ Bring in the name of an
important character or place
■ Use a word or phrase with
hidden meaning, which is
revealed as the plot unfolds
■ Try a popular expression
or a play on words
■ Try using an ‘-ing’ verb in
the title: Naming the Sin
■ Go for quirky. Choose
something that makes
readers stop and think
■ Use a possessive, eg The
Hangman’s Secret
how to use imagery. As is the Chrisandor bowed his head, had inflicted, I was sure that the someone who will send her
repetition of the father’s final released the tension that had rawness was over then. I thought child out into the pouring rain
words. By interspersing the gripped him since his father’s all the anger would fade, like as punishment for drawing
story with the refrain, we are death, and wept. spring snow on a rooftop. her father. This is great
reminded how the boy feels. characterisation because even
The characterisation here is A perfect ending. It is only as we get deeper though the narrator believes
N
very strong. Raised to follow into the story that the narrator’s her own fantasies, her actions
in his lumberjack father’s igel Hall’s Stopping true nature is on show. show she is far from an
footsteps, Chrisandor has the the Gush has so many avenging angel.
soul of a true musician. When twists and turns, it I remember one particular time, The ending is chilling, but
he asks to be taken on as an took a while for the when she’d drawn yet another a perfect fit for the story. I can
apprentice to an instrument true nature of the narrator to picture of her father, I snapped, like almost see Veronica going to
maker, it is clear this is the only emerge – a fact I applaud! the lead in one of her pencils. I took meet the couple, armed with
life he can contemplate. Even though it opens with her outside. another of the matching knives.
an admission of guilt, we ‘Tidy up those dolls,’ I instructed,
‘I need this, Master Bryant, are led to believe this was a not caring whether the neighbours
Please. It’s here.’ He thumped his mother doing all she could to heard this time or not. ‘They’ll get Lorraine is co-author
chest again. ‘Part of me.’ protect her daughter from the ruined in all this rain.’ of The Writer’s ABC
machinations of a predator. Checklist (Accent
And as he is able at last to From a mother whose only Press) and author of
achieve his dream, so he is When Sarah finally started to wish is to save her daughter children’s novel Vlad
finally able to grieve. open up about the abuse Kramer from harm, she has moved to the Inhaler (LRP)
SHORT STORIES
Fiction workshop with tutor

Lorraine Mace
Our head judge uses reader entries to show how to improve your writing
Make the case

I
t is sometimes necessary ‘casebook’ style of writing,
(or at least advantageous) to which could work very well for
include external reports to her series, but for this story it
flesh out information that needs a rethink.
readers cannot be privy to by
any other medium. The story unfolds
Crime writers might include The first page is headed From
a police report or a court Helen Adams’ casebook, with a
transcript in order to let the subheading: At the police station,
reader know what happened Sunday morning.
at an earlier time. This avoids A mother arrives at the
the need for flashbacks, and station with her adult son, who
is particularly useful when she says has been assaulted.
it wouldn’t be logical to go The mother is belligerent and
into detail because the main wants whoever assaulted
characters weren’t present. Lenny to be locked up. The
Let’s say, for example, the assailant is described as a
author wants the reader to possible transvestite who
know exactly what was said knocked Lenny down and then the nurses discuss her Olympic correct – her help was not
during a police interview tried to run him over. prowess in judo. needed. The police themselves
conducted years earlier by Lenny says he was attacked At the station that afternoon would have looked at
an officer who is now dead without provocation in the a bumbling officer is set against fingerprint analysis and CCTV
or otherwise unavailable. It car park of the local shopping Louise. But her husband footage to ascertain which
would be useful for the current centre. He is able to give a insists she be allowed to tell of the two individuals was
investigating officer to have a description of the man (dressed her version of events without speaking the truth.
minion unearth the transcript, as a woman) and the make and interruption and it transpires As the story forms part of
which could then either be licence number of the car. Lenny was the wrongdoer the series of Helen Adams’
discussed, or printed on the The next day the police go and Louise merely defending Casebooks, Helen needs to
page as a report for the reader to call on the woman who herself and her property. provide assistance that is not
to absorb. owns the car. When they say Her husband produces a only essential to the case being
It is a device that should be they wish to question her, she handbag (in a plastic bag) resolved but that would not
used sparingly in short stories asks her husband (a solicitor) to which he is certain carries have come to light without her
or you could end up with a remain in the room. He advises Lenny’s fingerprints and also intervention.
dry narrative because of her to say nothing and tells the suggests there is probably However, this is not the
limited character interaction. police she will report to the CCTV footage corroborating main issue. Correct use of the
That’s not to say it can’t be station to make a statement. his wife’s statement. casebook material is the basis
extremely effective in short There is then a short section Back to Helen’s point of view, of this column.
fiction, just that its usage needs told from the point of view of where she hears the police are
to be carefully considered. Helen Adams, who receives a not going to proceed against Sunday
Anne Geldart entered call from the solicitor husband Louise. Helen ends the story From the heading on the first
her story, Assault, into the asking for advice on the matter. by saying she is sure the page it is clear this should be a
competition, accompanied by The following morning Knightlys would have handled report from Helen’s casebook.
a plea for help. She has written Louise Knightly (the suspect) things without her suggestion However, the way the story
several novels and a collection visits a diabetic clinic, where a of processing the handbag opens is at odds with this.
of short stories based around nurse comments on some nasty and car for fingerprints, or
a retired police officer, Helen bruises. Louise explains she collecting the CCTV from the Sergeant Owen is duty desk
Adams, and is looking for was the victim of an attempted car park. sergeant on Sunday morning. He
advice on how to improve the bag snatch a couple of days That last paragraph is one is confronted by a young man:
stories and attain publication. earlier but was able to disable of the problems with the story five-foot ten, about twelve stone.
Anne has made use of the her attacker. When she leaves, because Helen is absolutely His expression is somewhat
If you’d like your Story Comp entry to be considered for a workshop, tick the box on the entry form or state it clearly in your email
hangdog, but Sergeant Owen puts could open with Mr Knightly that stuff. And then she went on Given my earlier comments,
this down to the ferocious manner phoning Helen and asking in the period of the later sixties and you won’t be surprised that
of the mother. her to come over as there are seventies teaching self-defence to this cannot be in the casebook
‘I’m Mrs Hardwick and this two police officers in his home ladies. She was one of the leaders unless Helen was present. As
is my son, Lenny. He came in accusing his wife of assault. of the women’s groups wanting with the visit to the clinic to log
last night at teatime covered in Helen could then ask to prevent women from becoming the injuries to Louise Knightly,
scrapes and bruises and obviously questions, which would reveal victims of street crime and male if Helen is going to use this
he’s been beaten up. And I want the gist of what had transpired violence. I think that was what scene in her casebook, she
something done about it.’ that morning in the police she got her ‘Dame’ for in the 1995 would need to be part of it.
station, but only an overview, Queen’s Birthday Honours.’ She could, of course, be told
There follows a section not a word-for-word, action-by- about it by Mr Knightly, but
of dialogue where Lenny’s action account. As with the police station then the opening paragraph
version of events is outlined, For this to be effective, the earlier in the story, Helen would need to show this is
interspersed with his mother’s sergeant who interviewed cannot know any of this information at second-hand:
observations. He later shows Lenny would have to be the because not even Mrs Knightly
the sergeant his injuries. same one who was there is there to hear what is being Mr Knightly reported that when
to interview Mrs Knightly. said about her. However, it he and Mrs Knightly entered
Lenny holds out his hands, Because we are dealing with would be very easy to put the interview room they found
palm upwards, then turns them a casebook account, this is the Helen in the room so that this Sgt Rob Hollins in conversation
over, and shows grazes to the heel only way what transpired in can form part of her report. with an inspector they not seen
of one hand and the knuckles of the station could come into After the visit from the before. Older, with grey hair and
the other. the story. police, Helen could suggest a wiry moustache, the inspector
to Louise Knightly that she appeared to Mr Knightly to have
The problem with both the Monday morning should go to the clinic to have an expression in part anger and in
dialogue and the actions is The story then moves to her bruises noted, just as a part frustration.
that Helen cannot know what Monday morning – at the High precaution in case she later
was said or done during this Street Medical Centre. This scene needs to prove she was injured. Strengthening the story
exchange because she wasn’t is used by the author to bring If Helen offers to accompany There are a few areas where
there. Neither was Mr Knightly, in the information that Louise Louise, she would be in the I would advise Anne to add
who later contacts her to ask Knightly was formerly Louise right place at the right time to depth to the plot. The first of
for advice. The only three Roberts – a judo champion with hear Louise explain what had these is to bring in a reason
people who can say what took the means to do the crime. happened to her. When Wendy for the mother and son to visit
place are the sergeant, Lenny comments on the danger the police station. As Lenny
and his mother. Mrs Knightly exits the Louise must have been in at the is clearly guilty, why would
Lenny is later examined by treatment room, followed by time, Helen could encourage he draw attention to himself
the police doctor, who agrees Wendy, who bids her a friendly Louise to talk about her past. by making a complaint? This
there are certainly injuries, but goodbye. She can be seen getting Helen could end the discussion doesn’t quite ring true.
she is unable to say how they into the passenger seat of a grey by saying she’d attended one I have already mentioned the
might have been sustained. Rover. of the classes Louise ran and advice given by Helen as not
Just then the practice manager bring in the honour awarded. being strong enough to swing
‘Told you. He was knocked returns to the reception desk. ‘Do the outcome for or against
about by a weirdo. Transvestite, you know who she is?’ she asks. Monday afternoon Louise, but the case itself
or whatever,’ interjects Mrs ‘Yes, Mrs Knightly, I’ve just The scene shifts to At the police isn’t strong enough to carry a
Hardwick. seen her,’ replies Wendy. station – Monday early afternoon. 3000-word story. However, if
‘What do you think, Doctor. ‘Ah, but do you know who she the crime of which Louise was
Was he knocked about?’ really is?’ Sgt Rob Hollins is in accused was a more serious
‘I can only report on what I see. conversation with an inspector one, such as Lenny being
He collided with a rough surface – There is then discussion of we have not seen before. He is an knocked unconscious and left
how he got there, I cannot say.’ her name and questions about older officer, grey-haired and with in a coma when Louise tried to
which sport she engaged in. a wiry moustache. The inspector drive away, then it would not
Once again, there is no way has an expression in part anger only be necessary for Helen
for Helen to know about this ‘Judo. She is a black-belt and all and in part frustration. to step in but essential, as the
conversation, or any of the Knightlys would need all the
discussion that follows it. This assistance they could get.
means that this scene, too, Using a report in fiction
cannot form part of Helen’s If you want to use a police or medical report to give facts you
casebook. would not otherwise be able to include in the story, remember Writing as Frances
The entire story, with the to keep it as short as possible – and only include essential di Plino, Lorraine
exception of the two phone information. For readers, such reports can be boring. Unless Mace is the author
calls between Helen and Mr you are setting out a court transcript, where dialogue and of the DI Paolo
Knightly, needs to be rewritten, actions are reported verbatim, use reported speech wherever Storey crime series.
either as reported discussion, possible. For example: Mrs Knightly said Lenny leapt on the car as Her latest book
or word for word, provided she drove away. is Looking for a
Helen was present. The story Reason.
POETRY WORKSHOP
Higher consciousness
Mountains terrify me – they
Just sit about; they are so
Proud.
Terrify by Sylvia Plath
S
ometimes writing a poem can seem
like a glorious walk in sunshine,
along a smooth, gently undulating
mountain track. But sometimes it’s
an uphill struggle; an unpleasant slog.
There is so much damp fog that you can’t
see your hand in front of your face. The
path is rutted, your boots rub and the
straps of your rucksack chafe.
Sometimes writing a poem can feel like
you have stepped onto a slope covered in
scree and you are sliding uncontrollably,
arms flailing, mouth full of dust, down through a meadow into trees. Write about or are they densely wooded? Do they smell
towards boulders or a crevasse. this physical landscape. of pine? Are they grazed by cows with
Whether or not you are nodding in Now (bear with me) stand at the foot of bells round their necks or are they riddled
recognition, I invite you to explore this a mountain and look up. See a path leading with mine workings and quarries? What
metaphor. As a first step, become the across a bridge, then winding through a kind of rocks are your poems made of?
mountain. Here is a suggestion about how meadow into trees… Now step away from your normal poem-
to begin. path and write three eight-line poems:
The path that needs changing is the one
Being the mountain in your mind… The Path is much like the ■■ An igneous poem that has solidified
experience of climbing a mountain. The climb is from lava or magma
Stand with your feet parallel and hip‑width tough. But each time you stop to look around, ■■ A sedimentary poem, formed when
apart. Let you arms hang straight down the view becomes more spectacular. You see material deposited by ice, wind, gravity or
by your sides, palms facing forward. Press a greater expanse, and the ‘flaws’ of the world water then settles or is squashed
your feet firmly into the ground and at disappear as you see more and more of the ■■ A metamorphic poem where rock is
the same time try to stand as tall as you whole. As you climb higher, you are detached subjected to heat and pressure, causing
possibly can. Slowly and carefully, try to from the heaviness below. You feel lighter. You profound physical or chemical change.
increase the gap between each of your feel freer. And you are propelled higher by the
vertebra. Feel yourself standing between increasing beauty you see. You may even like to ask yourself: what
the earth and the sky; feel yourself From this vantage point, you become more kind of rock am I?
becoming a mountain. Breathe steadily compassionate as well. You make dislike some
and rhythmically. individuals intensely for their cruel behaviour. Going the distance
How does it feel to be a mountain? But from a higher place, you’ll see more of the
Are you the tallest mountain for miles? whole… Reaching the summit of a poem is not
Think about what Sylvia Plath says about The journey upward is not always a steady always easy. Make a list of the reasons
mountains. Who do you terrify and why? climb. You may climb, then stop and rest, regroup. a reader may turn back or get injured
Are you proud or humble? and call for poem-mountain rescue. For
Stay standing like this for as long as From Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway example, your reader:
feels right for you, then gently return to by Susan Jeffries
being yourself. Now write about being a ■■ Loses sight of the path
mountain from the mountain’s point of Write about a journey through a ■■ Didn’t bring a map and there are not
view. How do you speak? To whom are metaphorical landscape. Use some internal enough signposts
you speaking? What worries or delights rhyme if you can, to convey the speed of ■■ Gets hungry, thirsty, cold or tired
you; makes you coy or embarrassed? the journey. (really try to explore these)
■■ Feels they have been here a million
Seeing the mountain A range of your own times before; they know what is round the
corner and it doesn’t inspire or excite them.
Having been a mountain, now stand at What type of poems do you usually write?
the foot of a mountain and look up. See a Sticking with the mountain image, are How can you mitigate these risks?
path leading across a bridge, then winding your poems steep with sparse vegetation Choose a poem (one of your own, or one
You can contact Sue at poetry@writers-forum.com POETRY
with poetry editor

EXPERIMENT
Sue Butler Night and day
‘I’d never drive. I’m scared stiff of accidents! Even if they don’t kill you, they mark
you for life!’ And so saying, the sculptor made an instinctive grab for the finger he had
written by someone else) and devise a risk-
assessment plan. You do not have to show nearly chopped off one day while whittling away at a wood statue…
this to anyone so be honest: constructively, ‘What do you mean?’ said Marie-Claude in a raucous voice. She was on top form.
not maliciously or brutally.
‘I was in a serious accident once, and I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. And I’ve
Return journey never had more fun than when I was in hospital! I couldn’t sleep a wink, so I just read
and read, day and night.’
Once you get to the top of a mountain, if
you do not plan to stay forever, your only They all looked at her in amazement. She basked in it. Franz reacted with a mixture
option is to head back down. Maybe you of disgust (he knew that after the accident in question his wife had fallen into a deep
accomplish this in your helicopter. Maybe
you strap yourself into a paraglider and depression and complained incessantly) and admiration (her ability to transform
jump off the edge into rising thermals. everything she experienced was a sign of true vitality).
Maybe you ski down or abseil.
When your reader reaches the summit ‘It was there I began to divide books into day books and night books,’ she went
of your poem, what do you hope they will on. ‘Really, there are books meant for daytime reading and books that can be read
do? Try writing a poem that makes your
reader do one of the following: only at night.’
Now they all looked at her in amazement and admiration, all, that is, but the
■ Call the narrator a liar
sculptor, who was still holding his finger and wrinkling his face at the memory of the
■ Change some aspect of their behaviour
■ Make a wish accident.
■ Give something away.
Marie-Claude turned to him and asked, ‘Which category would you put Stendhal in?’
Twin peaks The sculptor had not heard the question and shrugged his shoulder uncomfortably.
An art critic standing next to him said he thought of Stendhal as daytime reading.
Let the following two quotes lead you
wherever they will. The first is from
Edward Abbey (1927-1989), an American From The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera
author noted for his advocacy of
environmental issues and anarchist
political views. His novel The Monkey As you write a poem that explores some aspect of Marie-Claude’s claim,
Wrench Gang has been cited as an ask yourself whether your own poems would seem different if read by day
inspiration by environmental groups. or at night. Perhaps try it.
Then write a poem specifically meant for daytime reading and another,
May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, about exactly the same subject, .for reading at night. How do they differ
dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May and why?
your mountains rise into and above the clouds.
The second is from German philosopher,

Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900).
On the mountains of truth you can never

climb in vain: either you will reach a point higher
POETRY WORKOUT
up today, or you will be training your powers so Is the best way to get a friend to be a friend? Who is the best
that you will be able to climb higher tomorrow. friend you ever had: a pet, a teddy, a doll, a wild creature or an
imaginary companion?
Enjoy the climb!
1 What qualities must someone have (or not have) to be your friend?
Be specific and devote a stanza to each quality.
Poetry feedback service
2 Directly address a poem to a friend you have lost touch with and
now miss.
3
If you’d like detailed and targeted feedback
from Sue, you can purchase an extended Make friends with part of yourself you dislike, eg your temper,
timidity, big ears or bunions.
4
critique of three poems for £35. Email her at
poetry@writers-forum.com for details. Use words made from the letters in ‘friend’ in a sonnet, eg fiend,
fried, ride, fend, dire, den, din…
POETRY
Poetry competition with poetry judge Sue Butler
£100 winner
Danger in Plastic
Jim Mallin, Leeds
It took more than ten minutes
For the red kite to reach the ground
Breakfast of plastic spoils the dream
And it took less than a minute
The red kite has reached the ground

Eating the plastic thinking it green
Staggers into a limousine
It took less than a minute
The vehicle drives away from the scene

The driver annoyed, the car was clean
There’s a car wash in town
It takes less than ten minutes
About the poet Jim Mallin is 69, retired, and live in Leeds. He
joined a local writing group four years ago. He has three children
and seven grandchildren, which keeps him busy. Winning the
poetry competition this month was a nice surprise. This dark thing in front of her,
D
Dancing, always out of reach.
anger in Plastic, by Jim Mallin from Leeds, needs only 12 lines
and no punctuation marks to tell a tale that will make many What puzzled the girl and why only at first? What is this thing and
readers’ hearts plummet. The stark lack of punctuation does ‘dark’ refer its colour or its nature? Why might the girl want to
mirrors the starkness of the narrative and the apparently reach it? In the lines that follow, all is revealed and there is an especially
simple language leaves the reader nowhere to hide from the events as pleasing cadence in the lines
they unfold.
The pace of the narrative is well controlled, a good example being … she loved her shadow-self, mischief elf,
that, until line three, the reader is unsure whether the kite is a bird Felt a wholeness, with her twilight twin.
or the type of kite that people fly attached to a string. And the way
rhyme staggers erratically through the poem mirrors the red kite’s The Coy Goddess by Cerridwyn Payton, Preston, Lancs
final moments. While four lines form just the opening questions of the previous poem,
Time and colour are woven through the poem as the narrator does here the narrator needs only four lines in total. The narrator also
his or her best to stick to facts, the only opinion perhaps being in line chooses not to ask questions but to simply make a statement then
three, ie that a dream has been spoiled. leave the reader to consider their own response.
The similarities in the first and last lines make the impact of the
words that have changed very powerful indeed. You might like to The Coy Goddess is unleashed again,
explore this technique in your own poetry this month. calcifying bones with insecurity as sweetness
A singing siren built from anxious intent,
releasing flirtation as its derivative
Highly Commended
Chrysanthemums by Peter Dean, Great Shelford, Cambs
Catch me if you can by Patty Lafferty, Wenlock Shrops The opening line of our final highly commended poem raises a question
The opening lines of Patty Lafferty’s poem are a good example of that the next three lines answer.
another technique you might like to explore: how to ask the reader
a number of questions without even a hint of a question mark. They were only a couple of pounds –
The flowers I bought from Tesco.
It puzzled her at first, the laughing girl, Chrysanthemums in bloom,
Skipping, jumping. in April.
Writers FORUM
Each month our winning poet Want to see YOUR poem
wins £100 and a copy of the published in these pages?
new edition of Chambers Any topic, any style – all entries welcome! Rhyming or free verse,
haiku or sonnet, funny, sad, romantic or angry…
Thesaurus, worth £40. Prize £100
and a dictionary
ENTER AS MANY POEMS AS YOU LIKE
However, the poem contains a number of questions that the £4 PER POEM – OR £6 WITH CRITIQUE
narrator is unable to answer. The narrator spends time ‘Wondering
where you are?’ and ‘Wondering if you will come back?’ and wants to ● Poems must be a maximum of 40 lines and printed on A4.
know ‘Why couldn’t you say goodbye?’ ● Give your name, address, phone number and email address.
If you have time this month, any of these questions would make a ● Add a brief biography of yourself: age, occupation, family,
great title for a poem. Remember to explore possible answers as well writing career to date, favourite poets.
as reasons why, perhaps, these questions must remain unanswered.
● Entry fee is £4 per poem, or £6 per poem if you would like
The narrator of Chrysanthemums leads the reader through questions a brief but helpful critique from poetry editor Sue Butler.
to the closing statement Cheques (in sterling only) should be made payable to
‘Select Publisher Services’, fill in your credit-card details
I’m walking through mist. below or pay online at www.writers-forum.com
And Chrysanthemums again,
Remind me of my lost boy – How to enter
Fill in the coupon below (photocopies are acceptable) and
post with your cheque or credit-card details to:
Heartache… to my screaming core.
Writers’ Forum Poetry Contest
The reader is left listening to the narrator’s core screaming. No PO Box 6337, Bournemouth BH1 9EH
opinion is given and no judgement is made. How long the reader
By entering, you will have been deemed to agree for the poem to
chooses to stay and listen is up to them. appear in Writers’ Forum if it wins a prize.The competition is open
Knowing when and how to leave the reader is a fine art and all the worldwide but entries must be in English.
poems discussed this month show different ways of doing this. One
is not necessarily more effective than the other and different poems Deadline: 15th of each month. Late entries go into the next contest.
obviously benefit from different techniques and approaches. So it might
be worth asking yourself how you tend to end your poems. Some Name
questions you might like to ponder are:
Address
■ Have I explained too much or not enough? Postcode
■ Is the end too sudden or not sudden enough?
■ Should the last line be a statement, a question or the answer to Phone number
a question?
■ Do I need punctuation marks? Email address
Poem titles
Poems that might have been

Each month we give you three suggestions or questions
about the winning poem. Use them to explore the
different directions the poem might have taken. I declare that this poetry has not previously been published
Think about format, style of language and narrative or broadcast and that it is my own work
development. Use the questions to inspire your own
poem or poems. Signed
■ Rewrite Jim Mallin’s poem from the point of view of the plastic. I enclose (please tick) my poem(s) payment of £
Think carefully about the ‘crime’ it perpetrated and the different a stamped self-addressed envelope for my optional critique
techniques you could use to bring an inanimate object to life. Use
three four-line stanzas. OPTIONAL Please enrol me for an annual subscription
at the price of £38 (UK) £49 (Europe) or £56 (Rest of world)
■ Incorporate some punctuation marks into the poem. What effect
Visa/Mastercard/Maestro (delete) Total £
does this have on the poem’s meaning, rhythm, pace of narrative
development, etc. Card no
■ Write a poem that explores the topic of a dream that something or Expiry date Valid from (if shown)
someone spoiled (see line three). Is the dream spoiled accidentally or
Issue no (if shown) Security no (last 3 digits)
deliberately? What are the consequences?
Signature
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Send your event listings three months ahead to diary@writers-forum.com DIRECTORY
Literary diary
Kate Medhurst brings you
the pick of next month’s
writing and book events
FESTIVALS NAWG Annual Festival of

Writing, Warwick
Felixstowe Book Festival, Suffolk 31 August – 2 September
27 June – 1 July An open festival where you can hone your
A diverse mix of events covering everything writing skills and meet new friends. There are
from politics to romance.Vince Cable, Jenni opportunities to network with writers, agents
Murray, Tim Bentinck, Louis de Bernières, Blake and publishers, and a number of workshops run
Morrison and Mark Billingham are among those by professional tutors such as Ken MacLeod,
taking part. There will be storytelling in beach James Nash and our columnist Morgen Bailey.
huts, events in a shipping container, a flash www.nawg.co.uk
workshop, walking through woods, and more.
www.felixstowebookfestival.co.uk Felixstowe AUTHOR & BOOK EVENTS
Evesham Festival of Words Robert Crais, Staines

29 June – 1 July Festival at the Edge, Shropshire 3 July, 7pm
A celebration of words – written, spoken and 20-22 July The author will be at Waterstones talking about
sung – with something for all the family. Jackie A weekend of storytelling, tall tales, music and his latest novel The Wanted, followed by a book
Kabler, Ayisha Malik, Lindsey Bailey and Kate more, set in beautiful countryside, this festival signing. Tickets cost £3, redeemable against a
Riordan are among the authors taking part. in Whitchurch will feature practical workshops, purchase of the book on the night.
www.eveshamfestivalofwords.org story rounds and informal music sessions for For more details call 01784 490404.
all, plus stories and performances for children.
Bradford Literary Festival www.festivalattheedge.org Matt Haig, Doncaster
29 June – 8 July 4 July, 6.30pm
Launched in 2014, the festival showcases the Brentwood Children’s Literary The author will be at XP School to discuss his
work of leading writers, performers and poets Festival, Essex new book Notes on a Nervous Planet. Tickets are
alongside emerging talent. In 2017 more than 21-28 July £12.99, and include a copy of the book.
50,000 people attended 350 events over the For children from pre-schoolers to teens For more details call 01302 329142.
10 days, and 2018 is set to be just as exciting. (and their grown-ups). There will be writing
www.bradfordlitfest.co.uk workshops, storytime and interactive events. David Sedaris, Glasgow
www.brentwoodlitfest.com 13 July, 7.30pm
Ledbury Poetry Festival The humorist will be at the Royal Concert Hall
29 June – 8 July Port Eliot Festival, Cornwall following the release of his collection of essays
Over the course of 10 days, this Hertfordshire 26-29 July entitled Calypso. Tickets cost £30.
festival will host over 100 events. Its aim is to An annual celebration of words, music, ideas, For more details call 0141 353 8000.
take poetry off the page with talks, readings, imagination, nature, food, fashion, laughter,
performances, slams, competitions, workshops, exploration and fun. This year Billy Bragg, Blake Kirsty Gunn, St Andrews
residencies, theatre, song, dance and more. Morrison, Philip Marsden and Clare Mulley are 16 July, 8pm
Hollie McNish, Jackie Kay, Owen Sheers, Wendy among those taking part. The author will be at Topping and Company
Cope, Sandeep Parmar, Sinéad Morrissey, Major www.porteliotfestival.com Bookshop talking about her new novel, the
Jackson and Paul Henry will all be taking part. romance Caroline’s Bikini. Tickets cost £14.99,
www.poetry-festival.co.uk Edinburgh International which includes a copy of the book.
Book Festival For more details call 01334 585111.
Ways with Words, Devon 11-17 August
6-16 July Set in a specially created tented village in Linwood Barclay, Bromley
This 10-day festival of words and ideas at Charlotte Square Gardens, this festival offers 17 July, 7.30pm
Dartington Hall is a vibrant and joyful event, something for every age and interest, with The bestselling author will be at Waterstones
a chance for those who read books to meet more than 1000 authors taking part, including with his latest novel, A Noise Downstairs, for
those who write them. Among the well-known novelists, poets, scientists, philosophers, a talk and Q&A. Tickets cost £2, redeemable
names on the programme this year are Lynne sportspeople, illustrators, historians, against a purchase of the book on the night.
Truss, Penelope Lively and Michael Elsmere. biographers, Nobel and Booker prize-winners. For more details call 0208 460 6037.
www.wayswithwords.co.uk www.edbookfest.co.uk
Cathy Bramley and
Newark Book Festival, Notts Beyond Borders International Milly Johnson, Nottingham
13-15 July Literature Festival 19 July, 6.30pm
An exciting programme includes author events 25-26 August Johnson will be in the Sillitoe Room at
and panels, crime fiction, contemporary fiction, A weekend of panel discussions and debates Waterstones with her new novel, The Perfectly
history and children’s activities taking place at exploring world cultures and new ideas in the Imperfect Woman, chatting to local author
venues across the town. The festival aims to tranquil setting of Traquair House, near Peebles. Bramley about her new book Hetty’s Farmhouse
fire the imagination, challenge and inspire, while Previous authors and storytellers who have Bakery. The event is free but please register for
presenting the best in literature and the arts. taken part include Rob Penn and Mary Kenny. a place in advance.
www.newarkbookfestival.org.uk www.beyondbordersscotland.com For more details call 0115 947 0069.
DIRECTORY
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Send your event listings three months ahead to diary@writers-forum.com DIRECTORY
New courses
HELPFUL NEW BOOKS
The Promise of Failure: One Writer’s

Perspective on Not Succeeding by
John McNally (University of Iowa Press,
£14.86) is part
memoir of the
writing life, part
advice book and
part craft guide.
McNally uses
his own life as
a blueprint for
the writer’s daily
and existential
struggles,
tackling subjects
such as when to
quit and when
to keep going,
how to deal
with depression, what risking something
of yourself means, and ways to re-energise
your writing. Published 15 June.
Plots and Plotting: How to Create

Stories that Work by Diana Kimpton
(Kubby Bridge
Books, £7.99)
shows you
techniques
that took the
author from
rejection to
selling a million
books. Writing
Accommodation at The in a clear,
Writer’s Lab on Skyros friendly style,
she shows you
how stories
work, how to
RESIDENTIAL COURSES ONE-DAY COURSE find ideas and
how to develop them into a plot that keeps
Adventures in Comedy Beginner’s Guide to Writing readers turning the pages.
Writing, Greece a Novel, London
7-14 July 8 August
This course, from The Writers’ Lab on the The emphasis of this evening’s course is to get
Greek island of Skyros, will help you discover a grasp on what you’re up against – and to WEEKLY COURSES
your unique comic voice – from finding make it clear that although talent can’t be
your creative inspiration to learning the taught, story techniques and principles do exist John Retallack Playwriting
building blocks of humour. There will be some and are very powerful. Learn them well and Course, Oxford
non-writing exercises designed to encourage you will have the basic tools to write a novel. It 10 September – 3 June 2019
creativity, alongside writing games, with group costs £49 and takes place from 6.30 to 9.30pm. This professional level course from award-
feedback and tutor-led suggestions. The week www.theguardian.com/guardian-masterclasses winning playwright and director John Retallack
costs £725. is based in Oxford, and covers every aspect of
www.skyros.com writing a play. There are also individual tutorials
SHORT COURSES at the end of each term. Sessions take place
Writing a Novel, West Yorkshire every Monday and there is a maximum of eight
16-21 July Interactive Fiction, London writers per group. Admission is via interview
How do you connect the bits and pieces of a 23-27 July plus submission of written work. It costs £2750.
writing draft into a novel that takes life? How Led by computational artist and writer Rob www.oxfordplaywriting.co.uk
does a novelist hone the style, imagery and Sherman and a host of specialists in interactive
rhythm of his or her prose? In this residential storytelling, during this course you’ll learn the Novel Writing, London
course, you’ll work with two experienced skills and techniques to write works of fiction 13 September – 7 March 2019
novelists to discover the ‘deep currents’ of your in a dynamic form, one that allows the reader Taking place in the Curtis Brown Central
novel. It costs £720 including a single room, to choose the direction of the narrative. It London offices, this hugely popular, face-to-face
or £680 for a shared room, and takes place at takes place at the British Library, St Pancras creative writing course features visits from the
Totleigh Barton, a beautiful 16th-century manor from Monday at 10am until Friday at 7pm and Curtis Brown literary agents. It is led by Simon
house in Devon. costs £495. Wroe and costs £2990.
www.arvon.org www.bl.uk/events www.curtisbrowncreative.co.uk
MOTIVATION
Emily Cunningham of The Write Factor

publishing agency helps you find the way
forward with your writing
THE
MENTOR
How can I loosen up?
When I read back what I’ve written, my
writing makes me despair. It seems far too
formal, with overly complicated sentences.
When I’m thinking about what to write,
the ideas flow naturally, but actually
putting pen to paper makes me seize up.
What can I do?
Martin, Beverley
I
think writers the world over recognise I was encouraged by the fact that your mark by it. Obviously this unconventional
that feeling you describe: the ideas flow. This is an enviable starting image was beyond the remit of a primary
disappointing gulf between the fantasy point that many, including myself, would school curriculum and to be eradicated.
and the reality of creating. If only we could love to have. You have the potential for Reading it now, I wish that eight-year-old
all be Charles Dickens, who said: ‘When great things, it’s just some tweaking that’s had been encouraged to continue to pursue
I sit down to my book, some beneficent needed. It’s also good that you recognise quirky ideas, not have them suppressed.
power shows it all to me, and tempts me to that your style needs work, as many still There’s something to be said for silliness,
be interested, and I don’t invent it – really bathe in bubbles of blissful ignorance. for a lightness of touch. It can be so
do not – but see it, and write it down.’ It’s strange how a metamorphosis refreshing to break out of the confines of
Unfortunately, for the rest of us mere takes place when ideas are transcribed. what is expected.
mortals, the experience is not as easy. Formalising our thoughts seems to do We’re taught very rigid structures
Take fantasy writer Patrick Rothfuss: exactly that, make them more formal, around the notion of writing and they
when actually you want them to jump stay with us for life. Archaic and awkward
A lot of new writers assume you have to onto the page without being compromised. vocabulary emerges from nowhere, as
know where the story is going and that it flows I think it’s to do with our cultural and if Dickens’ Jarndyce and Jarndyce were
out as molten gold. But really, sometimes you societal associations with writing. We’re peering over our shoulders. Sentences
think you are going to one place, but then not used to writing naturally. that we wouldn’t dream of saying slip out
you decide that is a dumb idea. Then you go For most of us, our formative experience unthinkingly on to the page.
somewhere else and it is a worse idea. But is at school, where a formulaic and A very helpful technique is to read out
then you switch again and you might have a controlled style is encouraged. I remember what you have written. Have a pen ready
beautiful accident. looking back at an old schoolbook where and whenever you start sounding like a
I had written: The cows were in the fields stuffed shirt, underline it. Equally, when
‘A beautiful accident’ is a good place to making pancakes as it was Shrove Tuesday. you stumble, run out of breath or lose your
end up at. Reading your email, Martin, The teacher had biroed a red question place, rewrite that passage. Hearing your
Send your letters to Emily at mentor@writers-forum.com
easier than something dull. Get carried

away with telling the story and you will
discover a natural flow.
In practical terms, an engaging story
often hinges on the details. I went to a
wedding recently where the beautiful
Bentley hired to take the bride and groom
to the reception wouldn’t start, so they
ended up going in a Ford Galaxy. If I were
to write a story about this, details such as
the make of car add so much colour.
Another great technical tip is to break up
dialogue with actions to create a natural-
sounding passage. Here’s a lovely example
from the Creative Writing Guild website
(creativewritingguild.com/tips-tricks/9-
tricks-for-writing-organic-dialogue):
‘So, Jake. How do you, uh … meditate?’

He stabbed a potato with his fork. ‘You
breathe,’ he said, and then he popped the potato
in his mouth.
I laughed. ‘And?’
He raised his pointer finger to indicate he was
chewing. His eyes played mischievously as he
took his precious time in finishing his mouthful.
[…] He swallowed. ‘Nope, that’s it. Just breathe.
Don’t move. Don’t think. Just breathe.’
That potato makes it, doesn’t it? So,

Martin, try to shake up your writing style
by adding a metaphorical potato.
Perversely, you need to approach your
work unnaturally. That is, consciously move
away from your perceived ideas of what
‘writing’ is, to achieve a more natural feel.
Tips to take away
■■ Aim to read one poem, one short story

chatty letter to your writing? You know and one essay or section of a novel per day.
Read out what you can do it already, and this proves that It seems a lot but this routine will get your
you are adaptable. The awareness of this mind whirring with new ideas, vocabulary
you have written. skill should help you recreate that easy and perspectives.
tone in your work. ■■ Try free writing, where you set yourself
Whenever you start I find that when emailing one particular a time – 10 minutes? – to write off the top
sounding like a stuffed friend, I am able to summon up a much of your head. It’s useful because it helps
more fluid and conversational style than surmount the obstacles of self-doubt and
shirt, underline it with anyone else. There’s something about criticism. You’re less likely to get tangled
imagining him reading it that inspires me. up in overly worked syntax too.
words aloud is a great trick for discovering He ‘gets’ my sense of humour and it makes ■■ Remember the words of author Ransom
whether they flow naturally or not. me strive to amuse him. Is there anyone in Riggs (Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar
Once you become aware of this your life that provokes this response? Try Children): ‘Just unclench, live your life and
happening, as you have, Martin, then you to imagine them as your target audience. spend less time berating yourself. Anxiety
can curb the instinct for formality and Similarly, once you’ve identified and stress are the enemies of creativity.’
pursue a more organic style. who your ideal reader is, you could try
Another tack is to consider the varying familiarising yourself with the way they
writing styles you unconsciously adopt think and write by looking at internet The Write Factor offers all
in your day-to-day life. A sick note for the forums relating to the subject matter sorts of services to support
teacher has a different tone to a postcard to of your story. You get a glimpse of the your writing process, from
a friend. A text message to your partner is unselfconscious style of a passionate fan. mentoring and writing courses to editorial
a different animal to eBay feedback. They are genuinely interested in their feedback and assessment. Find out more at
Examine this chameleon ability. Why subject matter – are you? Writing about www.thewritefactor.co.uk
shouldn’t you bring the relaxed style of a something that fascinates you is so much
AUTHOR KNOW-HOW
Research secrets
Robert Lock tells Anita Loughrey how his research helped link his
characters across two centuries for his novel, Murmuration
W
ho would be foolish planned as I came to realise
enough to set their how subversive music hall
novel in not one, not could be.
two, but five distinct periods of
time spanning 150 years, with Surreal tension
technical specifics in many of I’ve always liked settings in
them and the need to weave which two or more elements
all of these into a (hopefully) are contradictory, creating a
coherent whole? Yes, well, I surreal tension (probably from
thought so too. For months my love of JG Ballard’s science
I tried to cram Murmuration fiction novels as a teenager), so
into a purely contemporary I knew I wanted to depict my
framework, only for my main resort during the war.
characters to chuckle and shake I remembered reading
their heads. Sorry, mate, there’s about the Royal Observer
no way round it, they said. You’re Corps using Worthing pier as
in for a lot of research. A lot. a look-out post, which tied in
Having finally realised to the plot perfectly – apart
there was no escape, the from the inescapable fact
over‑arching plot – how the details that bring it to life. that this did not happen in
the destinies of a Victorian I began to Mine is also a job that gives Blackpool! This, along with
music‑hall comic and a modern you access to everyone from several other inconsistencies,
end-of-the-pier stand-up are understand the Prime Minister to… well, including a pivotal plot detail,
bound together – suddenly
became clear. I had a beginning
the surreal stand-up comics. To talk to
and photograph people who
is why I had to create a kind of
amalgamated resort, and why
and an ending; all I needed nature of the are sometimes at either the it is never named.
now was a middle. pinnacle or the lowest point in Having chosen the ROC,
Clearly there was a need for
resort their life is a great privilege, I found their association
linking characters to form a and one that as a writer I website a very useful source,
chain across the centuries, so believe is unsurpassable as a with loads of information and
I began with an overview of with discarded props and source of both character and photos. On a visit to see family
pier history. Books such as dusty gilding, that I began to motivation. in Yorkshire I also went to
British Seaside Piers by Anthony understand the surreal nature When it comes to Victorian the Corps’ heritage collection
Wills and Tim Phillips and of the resort and the darkness entertainment, there’s no on the site of RAF Doncaster
The British Seaside by John K at its heart. For any writer shortage of material – it has to actually see the kind of
Walton were excellent, and I wanting to set a part of their been depicted many times in equipment they used, which
also naturally used the internet story in the past, find your every medium imaginable. also made me realise what an
to source images and articles. Brian Crompton and let them What is less easy to find is the important (and undervalued)
Perhaps my greatest inspiration show you behind the scenes. personal, subjective viewpoint, role they played, particularly
was an archivist called Brian That’s where the real action is. which is where biographies during the Battle of Britain.
Crompton. Brian (who sadly come in. The ROC also offered the
died some years ago) worked Live in your setting My Camden clown, the perfect setting to introduce
for the Winter Gardens in Although ‘write what you ill-fated Georgie Parr, grew Mickey Braithwaite, aircraft
Blackpool, and was incredibly know’ is something of a cliché, out of narratives like The spotter extraordinaire and
knowledgeable on local history. ‘live in your setting’ came in Pantomime Life of Joseph Grimaldi probably the most important
As I worked for the Gazette, handy during the writing of by Andrew McConnell Stott, character in the book.
Blackpool’s evening paper, Murmuration. I’ve been a press Gyles Brandreth’s biography of
our paths often crossed. His photographer for over 30 years, Dan Leno, The Funniest Man on Through the ages
enthusiasm was infectious, as 25 of those at the seaside. Earth, and Roy Hudd’s Book of The third section of the book
was his ability to delve into the Working in the setting for Music-Hall, Variety & Showbiz deals with the early 1960s,
resort’s nooks and crannies. your book means being able to Anecdotes. Georgie’s act ended the heyday of the resort. My
It was in these spaces, filled absorb sounds and surfaces, up far bawdier than I had main character here is the
LITERARY MARKETS
WRITING OUTLETS
with Janet Cameron
Quality literary journals

Eunoia Review
eunoiareview.wordpress.com
Eunoia is the shortest English

word to contain all five
fraudulent, combative fortune- entire character on it. vowels. It’s also a Singapore-
teller Bella Kaminska, whose The final part of the story is based outlet for poems and
booth is on the pier. This meant based in the present day, which stories, publishing two new
delving into palmistry, so meant I could do the normal pieces each day. It claims to
first of all I treated myself to a writerly thing and recount the be the home of ‘beautiful
reading with one of Blackpool’s weird and the wonderful from thinking’ and the online archive lives up to this promise.
prognosticators, which was my working life (though, to Tip: They have a page with name links to every contributor
five pounds well spent! There prevent possible lawsuits, my to make your poems and stories super-accessible.
were no tall dark strangers stand-up comedian, Sammy Submissions: Poems: send up to 10 at a time. Stories: can
on the horizon, but a fantastic Samuels, is an amalgam, and be up to 15,000 words in total, whether single or multiple
amount of detail for descriptive not based on any individual!). pieces. Send your work in the body of an email to eunoia-
purposes, particularly One of the most memorable review@gmail.com along with a third-person biography.
examples of it being just things I took from the
another business behind the contemporary world was the Spry Literary
soothsaying, like the kettle book’s title. One winter on Journal
glimpsed behind velvet the way home from work I www.sprylit.com
curtains. Having absorbed the was passing North Pier as the
ambience of the booth, I found starlings were performing their This biannual publication is
Palmistry – A Beginner’s Guide display, and all of a sudden looking for writing outside
by Lois Hewitt very helpful for I saw the murmuration as a the box, whether ‘vintage,
Bella’s pivotal reading. metaphor for the lives of my risky, flashy or vulnerable’.
And so to the 1980s, and characters – shifting, beguiling, They accept stories, flash
my local historian Colin separate from the pier and yet fiction and poetry. One page in each issue displays photos of
Draper (again, thanks to in many ways defined by it. the authors and links to their work – a nice touch.
Brian Crompton for inspiring Tip: They call themselves Spry because they want you to
this character). Colin begins Writing tip take risks while using language that is ‘spry and concise’.
to delve into the mystery If there’s one tip I would give, Submissions: Use the submissions manager. Do not at-
surrounding Georgie Parr’s it’s don’t neglect your senses. tach your name to your work but include a cover letter with
scandalous fate in the resort Hold that crystal ball in your identification. Fiction: up to 2500 words. Flash fiction: up to
while having to look after his hands, lean on the rusting 750 words, three pieces at a time. Poetry: five poems. Please
mother, who is suffering from iron of the pier, smell the 19th submit each category in a single document.
multiple sclerosis. The illness century woven into a Victorian
I am all too familiar with, as newspaper. I think these things Radar Poetry
two close relatives have been settle in a more profound part www.radarpoetry.com
stricken with it, but I needed to of our brain than words and
find out more regarding Colin’s images – and that’s coming This online journal is published
archival investigations. from a photo-journalist! The quarterly in January, April, July
Luckily my newspaper has book knew what it needed to and October. The editors like
microfilm records stretching be, even if, at the start, I didn’t. the interaction between poetry
back to its Victorian origins, Now it’s finished I hope all and visual media, so poems are
so I could study the writing my groundwork doesn’t get in paired up with artwork.
style of journalists back then. the way of the story; I believe Tip: They say their taste is ‘wide-
I created several articles for that visible research should ranging’ but there are no other
Colin to discover, which lead follow sensible design precepts, tips. Get a feel of what appeals to them by reading poetry
him to unearth long-forgotten ie less is more, and that like the from their online archive.
death certificates and police forest of supports beneath the Submissions: The reading period is 1 October to 30 June.
files. I found examples of these pier, you can walk safely above You must submit through the online submissions manager –
on the internet and used them the cold, relentless sea without follow the easy instructions. They aim to respond within a
to build my own. There was ever knowing they are there. month. See more at www.radarpoetry.com/guidelines
one photograph of a young
girl prisoner that struck such a • Find out more about Robert Lock • Janet’s ebook Fifteen Women Philosophers, published by
chord with me that I based an at www.robertlockauthor.com decodedscience.com, is available from Amazon
COMP CALENDAR
Competitive Edge
Finding support in WRITING GROUPS
Morgen hears from author and literary
festival organiser Marcia Woolf
Marcia Woolf is co-director placed in several and published in

of the new Hastings Litfest anthologies and online. My first
and author of two novels, significant success was with the
Roadkill (2016) and Cut Out Hysteria anthology. The Gift was
(out June 2018)… published in 2014, and in 2017
The Jar of Ideas appeared.
Like so many writers, I In 2016 I was invited on to
started young, entering my the panel judging the short
first competition for English story category. It was quite an
and Creative Writing in 1969, at eye-opener. I’d imagined us sitting
the age of eight, when I won a together in a room with a pile
book. Despite that early critical of paper, negotiating our way
acclaim, I didn’t immediately through the finer points of plot
pursue a career as a writer but and characterisation. In fact, the
carried on scribbling away for my whole process was online: each of
own satisfaction, ending up with us marked independently against
a huge folder of short stories, pre-set criteria.
dreadful poems, and a full-length The stories arrived in batches.
film script (mercifully and tactfully Stupidly, I hadn’t asked how many
rejected by Channel 4!). there would be – in the end I read
Hastings has an active and about 180! A few were awful but Marcia Woolf
long-established writers’ group, most were good, and some quite
which I joined in 2013. It has a astoundingly so. The Hysteria
structure based on workshops comp is open-themed, and Morgen’s Motivation include a writing retreat voucher,
and competitions. One of the comparing quality across a range Marcia’s route to publication, and festival pass, trophies, books and
group’s founders was Catherine of genres was a huge challenge. beyond, goes to show that we workshops. As Marcia mentioned,
Cookson, and we hold an annual For the first Hastings Literary all come to writing – or rather, the theme this year is ‘Conquest’,
short story competition in her Festival, we’ve chosen comps to taking our writing seriously – in the judge is novelist and short
honour. The group gave me the tie in with our workshops and our own good time. story writer Amanda Saint – and
motivation to finish my first other events: for a crime novel I was 38 and had led a very you have until 30 June to enter.
novel, Roadkill, and the ambition (judged by my publisher, Crooked ordinary life, so wondered what I Conquest is a great theme
to get it published. Cat Books), for sports journalism had to write about. But the ideas and dictionary.cambridge.org/
Being awarded the Cookson and for a short story. gushed forth. I had experiences, dictionary/english/conquest shows
Cup in 2015 spurred me on. We’ve learnt by experience, watched lots of television (Tales the extremes you can go to with
It was also the year our group so the story competition has a of the Unexpected a favourite, and this prompt. Consider how you
won the NAWG anthology theme, ‘Conquest’, and Amanda why I love short stories), and I could find the humour in dark and
competition, and I was really Saint of Retreat West is judging. read a gazillion books (mostly the dark in humour – they often
proud to be part of that. Our Being the first year, I’m not sure Stephen King). Mary Wesley go in hand in hand.
group in turn became judges we’ll get 180 entries like Hysteria, was 57 when her first novel was
for the following year’s NAWG but I know the time involved in published, and 85 at her last. ■ Send Morgen your
anthologies, and it was a fantastic assessing 270,000 words is more recommendations for ‘Comp
experience to read the work of than I’m able to tackle at the Comp of the Month of the Month’ as well as
other groups out there. We have moment! Literary festivals often run competitions we could include.
some real talent in this country I’m really looking forward to writing competitions and the She’d also love to know how
and it deserves to be recognised. reading all the entries, and Hastings Litfest is no exception. you’ve got on with comps listed in
Since I started entering especially to meeting the The short story comp has a word these pages or elsewhere. Get in
external competitions, I’ve been winners on 2 September.’ limit of 1500 words, and prizes touch at the email address above.
Send your success stories, questions for Morgen, tips and comp news (three months in advance) to comps@writers-forum.com
WEST CORK L
WEST CORK LITERARY
with writer, editor and
competition judge Morgen Bailey
WEST CORK LITERARY FESTIVAL
COMPS NOW OPEN Bantry, Co. Cork, Ireland
Costa Short Story Award Friday 13 – Friday 20 July 2018
Closes 3 Aug
readings / workshops / seminars / children’s events
Short story: max 4000 words.
Prizes: £3500; £1000; £500.
Details: see www.costa.co.uk/
costa-book-awards/costa-short-
story-award
Aesthetica Award Hastings

Closes 31 Aug
featuring
Poetry: 40 lines. Short fiction:
2000 words. Fees: £12 poem, £18 £100; £25; £5 for any published on Zadie Smith • Bernard MacLaverty
short fiction. Prizes: £1000 in website. Details: see www.early-
each category. Details: see www. workspress.co.uk or write to Early- Margaret Drabble • Philip Hoare • Louise O’Neill
aestheticamagazine.com works Press, Creative Media Cen- Sinead Morrissey • Nick Laird + Many More
tre, 45 Robertson Street, Hastings,
HE Bates Competition E Sussex TN34 1HL
Closes 3 Dec +353 (0)27 52788 / westcorkliteraryfestival.ie
Story: max 2000 words. Fee: £6 Hastings Litfest
for one or £5 each for two or Short Story Competition
more. Prizes: £500; £100; £50; Short story: max 1500 words.
Images, from left: Margaret Drabble, Philip Hoare, Zadie Smith Photos: Ruth Corney, Dennis Minsky, Dominique Nababkov
best Northamptonshire writer (if Theme: ‘Conquest’. Fee: £5.

not winner of other prizes) £50. Prizes: £200 voucher for Retreat
Details: www.hebatescompeti- West, trophy and 2019 festival pass;
tion.org.uk/competition-rules Litfest books, trophy and workshop; Aesthetica
Litfest books and trophy. Judge:
Hour of Writes Amanda Saint. Details: see Creative Writing Award
Weekly Competition hastingslitfest.org/competitions/
Every week short-story-competition
Fiction/Poetry/Journalism/
Script: max 2000 words.
Theme: varies. Fee: £3 max
Michael Terence Publishing
Spring Competition Call for Entries
(credit system). Prizes: depends Short story: 3000 words max. Dedicated to supporting and championing creative talent from
on number of entries. Details: Fee: £5. Prizes: £300; £200; around the world, the award is a celebration of outstanding
poetry and short fiction. Deadline 31 August 2018.
see hourofwrites.com/index/rules £100; publication in paperback
anthology and on website. Details:
COMPS CLOSING SOON see www.mtp.agency/competition win £1,000 & publication
www.aestheticamagazine.com/cwa
30 JUN MunsterLit Fool for Poetry
Chapbook Competition
The Blue Pencil Agency Poetry: 16-23 pages. Fee: €25.
First Novel Award Prizes: €1000; €500; plus publi-
Novel: first chapters up to 5000 cation, 50 copies; a reading at
words in any adult fiction genre, MunsterLit 2019 including accom-
plus 300-word synopsis and cover- modation. Details: see www.
ing letter. Fee: £20. Prizes: munsterlit.ie
£1000 plus agency introduction;
£250 plus manuscript editorial 31 JUL
review. Details: see bluepencil-
agency.com/first-novel-award-2018 Betjeman Poetry Prize
Poem: 10-13-year-old UK poets.
Earlyworks Press Theme: ‘Place’. Prizes: £1000
Poetry Competition (£500 for the winner and £500 for
Poem: max 40 lines. Fee: £3.50
each or £15 for up to six. Prizes: Continued overleaf
▲
Aesthetica CWA - QP Writers Forum.indd 1 31/01/2018 14:39

COMP CALENDAR
Continued from page 63
their school English department);

2 x £50; 3 x Eurostar tickets; book
tokens; poetry workshop and pub-
lication; poet visit. Details: see
www.betjemanpoetryprize.co.uk/
how-to-enter
HISSAC Flash Fiction and

Short Story Competitions
Exeter
Flash ficiton: max 500 words.
TARGET Story: max 2000 words. Fee: £5;
£12 for 3; £18 for 5; £25 for seven. £500 plus trophy; £150; £100; Tricia
YOUR Prizes: £250; £50; £25. Details:
see www.hissac.co.uk or write to
Ashley award for best humorous
entry: trophy plus £200. Details:
MARKET HISSAC, 20 Lochslin Place, Balin-
tore, Easter Ross IV20 1UP.
see www.creativewritingmatters.
co.uk/competitions.html
THROUGH 11 AUG Reflex Quarterly
THE Red Line Book Festival/

Flash Fiction Competition
Flash fiction: 180-360 words.
PAGES OF South Dublin Libraries

Poetry Competition
Fee: £7. Prizes: £1000; £500;
£250. Rules: must be 16 or over
Writers’FORUM
Poem: max 40 lines. Prizes: Details: www.reflexfiction.com/
€300; €200; €100. Details: see flash-fiction-competition-rules
www.redlinebookfestival.com/
Call Wendy poetry-competition Sentinel Literary Quarterly

Poetry Competition
21 AUG Poem: max 50 lines. Fee: £4; £7
Kearns on for two; £9 for three; £11 for four;
Red Line Book Festival/ £12 for five; £22 for ten. Prizes:
01392 466099 ITT Story Competition £200; £75; £50; 3 x £20. Details:
Short story: 1500-2000 words. see sentinelquarterly.com or write
Prizes: €500; €250; €150. to Sentinel Poetry Movement, Unit
Details: see www.redlinebook- 136, 113-115 George Lane, London
festival.com/itt-short-story E18 1AB.
28 AUG 30 SEP
Grindstone Literary Services Henshaw Press Quarterly

Open Poetry Competition Short Story Competition
Poem: max 40 lines. Fee: £4. Story: 2000 words. Fee: £5.
Prizes: £100; £50; £25; critique. Prizes: £100; £50; £25. Details:
Details: www.grindstoneliterary. see henshawpress.co.uk or write to
com/competitions Henshaw Competition, 24 Rowland-
son Close, Northampton NN3 3PB.
Harvill Secker
Young Translators’ Prize UNLESS OTHERWISE STATED…
Translation: short story, manu- Theme and genre are open. Entries
script provided. Prize: £1000 plus should be original and unpublished.
Harvill Secker titles and Writers’ Postal entries should be printed on
Centre Norwich mentorship. white A4 in a clear plain font. Include
Rules: open to translators aged a separate cover sheet with the title,
18-34 worldwide. Details: see word count, your name, address and
www.penguinrandomhouse.co.uk/ postcode, phone and email. Stories
publishers/vintage/harvill-secker should be double-spaced with good
margins.Where necessary include a
31 AUG large enough sae with sufficient
postage. Always contact the organiser
Exeter Story Prize and or check their website to confirm
Flash Competition details.Writers’ Forum does not
Story: max 10,000 words. Flash: accept responsibility for errors in or
max 1000 words. Fee: £12. Prizes: changes to the information listed.
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WRITING ROOMS
Where I write tie (not mine). Although I hardly ever play

Phil Barrington talks to performance poet the piano, I can’t bear not to have it here.
Matt Harvey in his Devon home When Tommy visits [composer Thomas
Hewitt Jones], he plays it beautifully and
M
its presence reminds me of the musical,
y first poetry collections were and, on the top shelf, a blown-up version SWIMBY, that we produced and the
written when I was living in a of the David Hughes cover of my first extraordinary, life-enhancing work we’re
large shared house with no private published collection, The Hole in the Sum about to create. More on that soon.
space. I wrote in bed, in cafes, in the of my Parts, which I confess I placed there I’d expect to be in here several hours
library, on trains, in the living room while for this photo – a photo that’s otherwise a day – between five and 12, but closer
others chatted and watched TV. When my uncontrived. (Why would you believe me?) to three. I turn up after getting the boys
kids were small I rented a room at an old Mainly what you see are hastily snapped off to school and walking the dog. I turn
school. It was actually a bathroom, the bath illustrations of Claudia Schmid’s, with up again in the afternoon and again
boarded over making an excellent seat. whom I’ve collaborated and hope to again. in the evening if I’ve no gigs or family
The room in the picture was the one All the drawings are awaiting a response commitments. Often, I’ll go into the
left unclaimed when we moved here last from me. You can’t see but most of them kitchen with a print-out, spread pages out
year. We call it the study. Not my study. have pencil scribbles, notes of marvellous, on the table and go to work on it with a
The others – my wife Heather and twins marvellous ideas. decisive biro. Sometimes I’m chased out
Finn and Tom – use it too, but not nearly My study wouldn’t be as tidy if not for of the kitchen by the sun, and I go into the
as much. It really helps to have my own my friend Lynne coming over and helping living room. So many rooms, but I never
space, I’m sure I get more done. In fact, me out. We are a two-person writer write in the bathroom.
for the larger projects – especially musical support group. The only reason this room isn’t ideal is
theatre projects – it’s been essential. The most precious thing in here has to because it reflects the occupant. I would
My personality is more slumped than be the piano, which you can’t see because like a vastly improved occupant. The
stamped on my room. Most of my books of the camera angle. There’s a printer on simple fact is this place is special. It means
are still in boxes in the garage but there the piano, on a carefully folded, tastefully that quite probably I really am a writer. I’ve
are some copies on the shelves. Not face chosen throw. And another lamp. And certainly convinced my family of this, and
out. There’s a couple of pics of my kids some insoles. And a Totnes Rugby Club could well come to believe it myself.

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