0408 World Literature Coursework Handbook 2016 PDF

Coursework Handbook
Cambridge IGCSE®
World Literature
0408
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© Cambridge International Examinations 2016
Version 2
Contents
Introduction ....................................................................................................................... 2
Advice and guidance
Further help
Section 1: About the coursework ........................................................................................ 3

1.1 Content of the coursework portfolio
1.2 The advantages of coursework
1.3 Scheduling coursework
1.4 Scheme of work
Section 2: The critical essay ................................................................................................ 5

2.1 Guidance
2.2 Critical essay – assessment criteria
2.3 Examples of assignment 1 critical essay
Section 3: The empathic response .................................................................................... 28

3.1 Guidance
3.2 Empathic response – assessment criteria
3.3 Examples of assignment 2 empathic response
Section 4: Oral response ................................................................................................... 42

4.1 Guidance
4.2 Choice of texts
4.3 Preparing for the oral response
4.4 Oral response – assessment criteria
4.5 Conduct of the Oral response: for teachers
4.6 Types of question in the oral assessment: recorded conversation
4.7 Examples of assignment 3 Oral Responses
Section 5: Coursework administration ............................................................................... 50

5.1 Teacher supervision
5.2 Length of assignments
5.3 Technical accuracy in written coursework
5.4 Plagiarism in written coursework
5.5 Evidence of marking and annotation on candidate work
5.6 Presentation of assignments
5.7 Individual Candidate Record Cards
5.8 Internal standardisation
5.9 Internal moderation
5.10 The sample for external moderation
Introduction
Introduction
Advice and guidance

This handbook provides a guide to both the written and oral elements of the Coursework Portfolio,
Component 1, in the Cambridge IGCSE World Literature (0408) syllabus.
It offers advice and clarification on:
• The requirements of the two written coursework assignments (the Critical Essay and the Empathic
Response)
• The requirements of the oral response: recorded conversation
• Assessment standards
• Marking candidates’ assignments
• Preparing the written assignments for external moderation
Please note that, in the interests of having all information relating to coursework in one place, this handbook
reproduces some of the material that can be found in the Cambridge IGCSE World Literature Teacher Guide
(0408).
Further help
We hope that this Coursework Handbook will provide a thorough introduction to the requirements and
criteria for the assessment of coursework in Cambridge IGCSE World Literature. However, if you have any
further questions or difficulties, please do not hesitate to contact Cambridge.
The address to which your queries should be sent is:
Customer Services
Cambridge International Examinations
1 Hills Road
Cambridge
CB1 2EU
United Kingdom
Telephone: +44 1223 553554

Fax: +44 1223 553558
Email: info@cie.org.uk
Website: www.cie.org.uk
2 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

Section 1: About the coursework
1.1 Content of the coursework portfolio

The table sets out the key requirements of the Portfolio.
Assignment Total marks Requirements

1. Critical essay 25 • 800–1200 words (including quotations but not references/
bibliography).
• Based on one text*.
• The text must not be on the examination (Paper 3) or the
same text as for Assignment 2.
2. Empathic 25 • 600–1000 words.
response
• Assumes the voice of one character in one prose or drama
text.
• The task prescribes a particular moment in the text (which
may be the end of the text).
• The text must not be on the examination (Paper 3) or the
same text as for Assignment 1.
3. Oral response: 15 • 4–7 minutes.
recorded
• A conversation with the teacher on an aspect of the
conversation
candidate’s chosen text:
• EITHER the way a novelist or playwright presents a particular
character
• OR the way their chosen writer (from prose, drama or poetry)
presents a particular theme.
• Text may be an examination (Paper 3) set text or a text
studied for one of the other coursework assignments.
• The conversation must be recorded.
This component carries 50 per cent of the assessment of the syllabus as a whole.
Learners will submit a portfolio of two written assignments AND one oral assignment. [Note that this
handbook relates to the written assignments.]
This component as a whole requires study of at least two different forms (poetry/prose/drama), with texts
drawn from at least two countries/cultures.
The assignments are set and marked by the teacher(s), and internally moderated where there is more than
one teacher doing the marking. They are subsequently externally moderated by Cambridge Examiners.
Assignments should follow a programme of study undertaken by a teaching group and may be completed at
any stage during the course. It is advised that each learner undertakes more than two written assignments
during the course to provide a choice of work towards her/his portfolio, and that both teacher and learner
discuss which are the best assignments to submit. Learners should also have opportunities to prepare for
the oral responses.
Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 3

Learners do not have to produce written assignments under examination-type conditions. The oral
assessment has to be recorded by the teacher. Guidance about the conduct of the oral assessment is given
in Section 4.5 of this handbook.
The Cambridge Handbook for Centres contains guidance and general regulations about internal (school-
based) assessment of coursework.
1.2 The advantages of coursework

The Portfolio has been designed to test learners’ appreciation of literature in three strikingly different ways:
through critical or analytical writing; through more imaginative empathic writing; and by means of an oral
response.
Coursework allows you as a teacher greater flexibility and a degree of creativity in the way you design and
deliver your courses. Texts and tasks can be chosen which complement the study of the examination text(s)
and which take into account the interests and abilities of learners, as well as the literary enthusiasms of
teachers.
Coursework allows learners to re-draft their written responses, developing skills such as critical thinking,
editing and proof-reading, which will benefit them in other areas of the syllabus, in other subjects and in
future stages of their education.
1.3 Scheduling coursework

Careful consideration needs to be given to the scheduling of coursework assignments within the overall
course. Setting them near the beginning of the course may not lead to learners producing their best work.
For example, learners are likely to perform better in the Critical Essay assignment of the Portfolio if they
have developed suitable skills of textual analysis before they embark on this assignment. Similarly, it would
be prudent to offer opportunities for learners to practise empathic writing before working on the Empathic
Response assignment they are to submit. Centres will also need to give careful thought to the scheduling
and particular practicalities of the oral responses. Lessons leading up to the oral assessments should enable
learners to feel confident about:
• the depth of their knowledge on their chosen topic

• the requirements of the assessment.
Many Centres might conclude that coursework assignments are best not completed during the first term.
On the other hand, it is important to get all coursework assignments completed in such a way that sufficient
time is allowed for revision of the set text/s and for practice exercises for the Unseen paper. Schools also
need to allocate time for coursework administration so that relevant materials for external moderation arrive
at Cambridge by the deadline for coursework submission.
1.4 Scheme of work

The Cambridge scheme of work for this syllabus can be found on Teacher Support
(https://teachers.cie.org.uk); it is designed to help Centres with medium-term planning. There are units on
the three main literary forms (Prose, Drama and Poetry) and on each of the coursework items:
Unit 5 Critical Essay

Unit 6 Empathic Response
Unit 7 Oral Response: recorded conversation.

Section 2: The critical essay
2.1 Guidance
When framing coursework tasks, it is important to refer to the relevant assessment criteria. It can be seen
that for learners to attain the highest marks there must be an ability to probe texts critically. Successful
essays are those which explore the ways in which writers make their characters, themes or settings
memorable and vivid. These essays examine how the writer uses form, structure and language to create
and shape meanings. Characters are seen as fictional or dramatic ‘constructs’ rather than real-life people,
and there is a clear focus on the role of the writer in presenting characters. The strongest responses
combine succinct, pertinent, textual reference with precise, critical comment; quotations are used to
substantiate a point about how a writer uses a particular word or phrase to create certain effects. By
contrast, copious quotation without pausing to comment does not contribute to the development of critical
analysis; inert quotation of this kind cannot lead to high reward.
Critical vocabulary, properly deployed, can enhance an argument, but it is not very helpful if merely used
to log literary devices. The observation ‘“Time’s winged chariot” is an example of personification’ is an
accurate description but should not be confused with analysis, which involves a consideration of the effects
created by using these words. Learners should be taught that generalised comments such as the following
may be true but do not constitute analysis: ‘the writer’s use of language draws you in’; ‘the description
makes you feel as if you are there’.
In order that learners have the opportunity to realise their potential, they need to respond to tasks which
have a precise and manageable focus and which invite a detailed engagement with the literary aspects
of texts. Unhelpful tasks are those that encourage the production of mere plot summaries or character
sketches.
Essays should not be used as a vehicle for unloading extraneous background material about the author’s
life or times. The assessment criteria do not reward this, and learners should be discouraged from offering
paragraphs of background before they proceed to answer the question.
Examples of suitable tasks

The following tasks explicitly target the writing. It is important to include the writer’s name in the task. Clear
command or question words are used at the beginning of each task: e.g. ‘How?’, ‘In what ways?’, ‘Explore’.
The focus of each task is specific and manageable for an 800–1200 word essay.
1. In what ways does Kafka memorably convey the isolation of Gregor Samsa in Metamorphosis?
2. Explore the ways in which Ibsen presents the character of Nora at two different moments in A Doll’s
House.
3. To what extent does Shakespeare make you sympathise with the Nurse and her actions in Romeo and
Juilet?
4. How does Hansberry vividly capture the dreams of two of the characters in A Raisin in the Sun?
5. How does [your chosen poet] strikingly convey the loss of childhood innocence in two of the poems you
have studied?
6. Explore the ways in which two short story writers strikingly present conflict between a man and a
woman.
Note that in the last two examples there is no requirement to compare. The learner can deal with one short
story, and then the second.

Examples of unsuitable tasks

1. The House of Bernarda Alba
2. Write about what happens in Purple Hibiscus.
3. Nora in A Doll’s House
4. What does Orwell’s Animal Farm tell us about the Russian Revolution?
5. How do five of Neruda’s poems deal with nature?
6. Compare the ways in which two of the short story writers you have studied use first person narrators.
7. Explore the ways in which Ibsen presents the character of Nora throughout A Doll’s House.
Tasks 1–3 in the list above invite learners to write little more than plot synopses or unfocused character
sketches.
Task 4 does not have a literary focus.
Task 5 invites consideration of too many poems and the topic is somewhat vague; this would lead to a
superficial approach.
Task 6 asks for comparison, something which is not required, or rewarded, by the assessment criteria.
Task 7 has an engaging focus but could become unwieldy if the learner tries to cram too much into the
assignment, and in so doing produces a superficial commentary rather than a probing analysis.
It is certainly permissible for all your learners to study the same text for their critical essay. It is often
worthwhile offering a number of tasks from which learners can choose. They may, if they wish, propose
their own assignments, though you should check the wording of tasks in order to ensure that they meet the
assessment criteria.
Because the subject seeks to promote the importance of an informed personal response, it would be
disconcerting for an external moderator to see from any teaching group, essays which make the same
points and deploy the same quotations in the same order. Learners should be encouraged to think for
themselves rather than regurgitate what they have been told.
Learners should keep an eye on the word count as they draft and re-draft their essay. Very short essays
tend to be self-penalising as they fail to sustain critical analysis. Excessively long essays can lose focus. The
word count should be indicated at the end of the critical essay. The moderator will not consider work beyond
the 1200 word limit.
Remember that candidates must not submit a critical essay on a text being studied on Paper 3.

2.2 Critical essay – assessment criteria

Band Mark Descriptors
Band 1 25 Answers in this band have all the qualities of Band 2 work, with further
24 insight, sensitivity, individuality and flair. They show complete and sustained
23 engagement with both text and task.
Band 2 22 Sustains a perceptive and convincing and relevant personal response
21
20 • shows a clear critical understanding of the text
• responds sensitively and in detail to the way the writer achieves her/his
effects
• integrates much well-selected reference to the text
Band 3 19 Makes a well-developed, detailed and relevant personal response
18
17 • shows a clear understanding of the text and some of its deeper implications
• makes a developed response to the way the writer achieves her/his effects
• supports with careful and relevant reference to the text
Band 4 16 Makes a reasonably developed relevant personal response
15
14 • shows understanding of the text and some of its deeper implications
• makes some response to the way the writer uses language
• shows some thoroughness in the use of supporting evidence from the text
Band 5 13 Begins to develop a relevant personal response
12
11 • shows some understanding of meaning
• makes a little reference to the language of the text
• uses some supporting textual detail
Band 6 10 Attempts to communicate a basic personal response to the task
9
8 • makes some relevant comments
• shows a basic understanding of surface meaning of the text
• makes a little supporting reference to the text
Band 7 7 Some evidence of simple personal response to the task
6
5 • makes a few straightforward comments
• shows a few signs of understanding the surface meaning of the text
• makes a little reference to the text
Band 8 4 Limited attempt to respond
3
2 • shows some limited understanding of simple/literal meaning
Below Band 8 0/0–1 No answer/Insufficient to meet the criteria for Band 8.

2.3 Examples of assignment 1 critical essay

This section contains three examples of assignment 1, together with commentaries on their strengths and
weaknesses.
Script 1
Explore Shakespeare’s use of oxymoron and antithesis in the play Romeo and Juliet.
Right from the start it is inevitable that Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet are to meet a tragic
end with the children of the feuding families of Montague and Capulet committing a double
suicide in the name of love. The young star-crossed lovers are in fact ‘born to die’ and the use
of recurring antithesis creates this sense of conflict that is aroused. Romeo and Juliet is full of
oppositions that Shakespeare uses to emphasize the many ideas that are juxtaposed such as:
love versus hate, death versus life, youth versus age along with fast versus slow. The play is aptly
described as having ‘much to do with hate, but more with love (1:1:166) and Shakespeare uses the
contradictory sensations of love against hate to express the great turmoil caused by adolescent
infatuation. As violence plagues the city of Verona, the lives of adolescents are cut short, hinted
by the frequent personification of death in the language used. Finally the antithesis of fast versus
slow is explored as Shakespeare plays with the tempo through the play.
Comment
At first sight, the task might appear to be somewhat narrow with its focus on oxymoron and antithesis.
There is a risk in this case that candidates might simply log instances of each device. This candidate,
however, keeps the command word ‘Explore’ keenly in sight throughout the essay and offers much more
than a mere noting of features. The opening paragraph provides a confident overview: ‘many ideas are
juxtaposed such as: love versus hate, death versus life, youth versus age along with fast versus slow’.
Shakespeare’s comparison of the ideas of love and hate show the complexity of the two
emotions and arouses conflict within the play. The contradictory sensations that are evoked
by the playwright’s use of antithesis of ‘loving hate’, wreck ‘misshapen chaos’ of ‘well seeming
forms’ (1:1:167/170) in Romeo’s life as he speaks of his unrequited feelings to Benvolio, yet his
elaborate means of speech seem artificial and insincere. In Act 1 Scene 1 Romeo feels ‘heavy
lightness’ along with ‘sick health’ and ‘serious vanity’ (168/171). To express how love confuses
and mixes up all kinds of things Shakespeare’s choice of phrases such as ‘bright smoke’ and ‘cold
fire’ (1:1:169) add to the turmoil that Romeo feels. Yet due to the use of classical courtly poetry
Romeo’s turmoil can be misinterpreted as plain infatuation. Romeo’s fanciful imagery, wordplay,
oxymoron and rhyming couplets do not seem heartfelt and instead reflect the type of courtship
behavior expected of him by the society. It is this society that is filled with hostility and hate
that threatens Romeo and Juliet’s love, not allowing them to unite by any conventional means. In
Act 1 Scene 5 Juliet aptly describes that her ‘only love is sprung from [her] hate’ (137). The play
commences with a violent action packed scene between the feuding families, foreshadowing that
eventually the protagonist’s ‘violent delights’ will come to ‘violent ends’ (2:6:9). Romeo and Juliet’s
love and selflessness, which is arguably selfish, as well as their willingness to die for one another
clashes with the social norms and is in strong contrast with its male-dominated, lewd and violent
ways. The language and form of dialogue shared by the lovers’ in a sonnet, a poetic convention
that was popular in the Elizabethan age, expresses the intimacy and the bond between the lovers.
In their first sonnet itself we see antithesis the phrase ‘rough touch’, which is contrasted with

‘tender kiss’ (1:5:95). The intimate feelings evoked allow Shakespeare to involve the audience
emotionally as if they were the recipients of a poem, instead of limiting himself to the dramatic
performance. Therefore through the means of antithesis the playwright compares the notions
of love and hate in a society where the hateful norms clash with the protagonists’ adolescent
passions.
Comment
In the second paragraph there is a close exploration of particular phrases e.g. ‘heavy lightness’, ‘sick
health’, with the candidate’s own judgement that the ‘elaborate means of speech seem artificial and
insincere’.
Shakespeare’s personification of death pervades the language and captures the paradox of how
life and death go hand in hand in the violent city of Verona. The most powerful personification in the
play is of Death as Juliet’s husband and the bridegroom. In Act 4 Scene 5 Lord Capulet refers to
Death as his ‘son-in-law’ and ‘heir’ and is consumed with newfound grief that ‘all is death’s’ (38/40).
Along with personification, Shakespeare uses antithesis in the language of Lord Capulet as all
of Juliet’s ‘wedding cheers’ turn to a ‘sad burial feast’. ‘Instruments’ become ‘melancholy bells’,
‘solemn hymns’ turn to ‘sullen dirges’, and ‘bridal flowers’ serve for a ‘bridal corpse’ (4:5:86/89).
The personification of death is antithesis in itself as death is given human attributes that are
associated with life. This frequent use of antithesis along with the personification of death
heightens the anguish and loss that the Capulet’s are shown to feel over their daughter’s death
whilst also illuminating the artifice of their grief. Their treatment of Juliet before her feigned
death in contrast to their proclaimed feelings after make them seem insincere and their use of
antithesis reveals this. Another opposition is created with the use of dramatic irony even though
the audience is aware that Juliet is alive her parents and Romeo do not. However the repeated use
of phrases that are comprised of the word death show that it is imminent. ‘Untimely death’, ‘death
bed’, ‘death-darting eye’, ‘present death’, ‘cruel death’, and ‘detestable death’ are a few examples of
this and the protagonists’ fates are reinforced time and time again. Unfortunately the more alive
Romeo and Juliet seem with their passion and exhilaration the more doomed they are.
Shakespeare uses the antithesis of a fast paced plot against one that is slow adding another
layer of complexity to the play. Firstly the passion that is manifested by the impulsive youth
strikingly contrasts with the cautiousness that the mature and older characters portray. In Act
2 Scene 3 Romeo’s impetuousness is evident when he says ‘I stand on sudden haste’ (93) and Friar
Laurence who undoubted attempts to fulfill his duties as Romeo’s father figure urges him to ‘love
moderately’ and ‘be patient’. However Romeo disregards the Friar’s advise as well as Balthazar
when he says ‘I do beseech you, sir, have patience: your looks are pale and wild, and do import some
misadventure’ (5:1:27/29). It is this foolish haste that eventually causes Romeo’s death and
contrasts with the slowness of Friar Laurence’s actions such as the delayed letter and arrival at
the tomb. The death of the young protagonists seem inevitable regardless of who is to blame and
after leisurely beginnings scenes explode into violent action and then simmer down again keeping
the audiences attention. Romeo and Juliet opens with the dispute between the Montagues and
the Capulets, a fast paced and action packed scene and eventually leads up to the scene in the
Capulet’s orchard where time seems to halt as the ill-fated lovers express their feelings for one
another. In Act 2 Scene 2 Juliet says that their actions are ‘too rash, too unadvised, too sudden’
(118) and this sets the romantic tone and pace for the rest of the play and the sudden turn of
events cause the lovers to become reckless and force them into hasty action. By playing with the

tempo of the play Shakespeare grasps the audience’s attention and thickens and layers the plot as
the ending is already foretold.
The antithesis and oxymoron that is incorporated into the language of Romeo and Juliet creates
the sense of turmoil and drama that essentially arouses conflict in this tragedy. The words of the
play evoke a strong response from the audience, as Shakespeare besets the protagonists with
conflict. An element of suspense grips the audience that is felt through the constant rollercoaster
of emotions that Shakespeare encapsulates in the use of antithesis.
Comment
The candidate sustains a clear critical response to the content of the play and engages with the way
Shakespeare achieves his effects. Carefully-selected and neatly-integrated quotation supports a
perceptive and sensitive response.
Word count, 1200
Bibliography:
http://education.cambridge.org/as/ subject/english/Shakespeare/cambridge-school shakespeare-
(latest -editions) Icambridge-school-shakespeare- romeo-and-juliet- (Iatest edition)
Summative comment
Throughout this answer there is a confident focus on form, including in the second paragraph, a
consideration of the effect of using a sonnet in a play. This essay shows considerable insight, sensitivity,
individuality and flair and is placed at the top of Band 1, achieving 25 marks.
Script 2
Explore the way the writers of the two stories, Sredni Vashtar (by Saki) and The Bath (by Janet
Frame), vividly highlight the values and attitudes of the main characters in their stories.
Comment
The task, beginning with the command word ‘Explore’, is clearly focused on the ways in which writers
achieve their effects. The requirement to write about two of the short stories studied has been met. The
candidate deals with each story in turn – there is no requirement to compare poems.
In Sredni Vashtar, the interesting and slightly terrifying protagonist is a young boy called
Conradin. Throughout the short story, the author depicts him as a rebellious character, who is
driven to a state of madness due to his being confined, continually, by his guardian.
The root cause for every action committed by Conradin is his loneliness. His dismal outlook on the
world (except for his haven) is due to his lack of companionship, since he is cooped up within the
house, in conjunction with the orders dictated by ‘the woman’. His only solace was ‘his imagination,
which was rampant under the spurs of loneliness.’ The strange world that he concocts within the
walls of the woodshed transports him to a place where he can escape his troubles, solitude and
terminal illness. Additionally, the confinement kindles and attitude of immense hate for the woman,
and silent rebellion.

Comment
The first two paragraphs offer a perceptive overview of the character of Conradin: ‘His dismal outlook
on the world (except for his haven) is due to his lack of companionship, since he is cooped up within the
house…His only solace was “his imagination, which was rampant under the spur of loneliness.” The
strange world that he concocts within the walls of the wood shed transports him to a place where he can
escape his troubles’.
In the beginning of the story, it is expressed by the author that Conradin has a rebellious
attitude towards the woman and towards ‘those three-fifths of the world that are necessary
and disagreeable.’ Conradin despises this large chunk of the population, since they are those who
reject his imagination. His rebellious nature is first noticeable when the author writes, ‘gained an
added relish from the likelihood that they would be displeasing to his guardian.’ Second, the entire
foundation upon which he bases his religion is completely contrary to the principles of the woman’s
religion. Although he went to Church with the woman every week, he silently revolted against that
routine by conducting ritualistic practices that opposed the principles of Christianity. Conradin
continues to display this obstinacy in terms of his distaste for his aunt; when his aunt offers him
toast, which he ordinarily enjoys, he refuses to eat it. In fact his hate for the woman is so powerful
that it prevents him from displaying any angst in response to the capture of his beloved hen by the
woman, simply so that he does not give her that pleasure of having made him angry or upset.
A particularly interesting facet of Conradin’s character is the conflict between his inner child
and his mature side. Although after all, he is a ten year old boy, he frequently displays startling
maturity. This existing juxtaposition between the two sides of Conradin is referred to as the
author writes of the haven, ‘something that took on the varying aspects of a playroom and a
cathedral’. I believe the ‘haven’ is actually a symbol for Conradin’s twisted character. The playroom
is indicative of his childlike mannerisms, while the Church speaks of his darker, more mature side.
The metaphor captures the contradictory facets of Conradin’s character. In terms of his childlike
mannerisms, the author subtly refers to these, by using language like, ‘honestest’, which is a word
that only a child would use. Additionally, Conradin displays a sense of innocence, such as when he
calls the Houdan hen an anabaptist, when he doesn’t have the slightest idea what and anabaptist
is! However, the author intertwines a dark sense of maturity within Conradin, such as the instance
in the beginning of the story, where the author mentions that Conradin can mask his hatred for the
woman ‘with perfect sincerity’, which, ordinarily a child would not do, but would instead blurt out his
feelings.
Conradin’s character has a lonely life, but the author shows his rebellious attitude towards his
guardian and society, by displaying his interactions in the haven and with the woman. Due to his
condition, he cannot live the normal life of a young boy, and so his attitudes are too, abnormal.
Comment
Well-selected references support a clear critical engagement with the detail of the story. What the
candidate describes as ‘the conflict between his inner child and his mature side’ is carefully explored
in the essay, not least the attention paid to the metaphors (‘playroom’ and ‘cathedral’) used to describe
Conradin’s ‘haven’, the shed. The interesting personal view that ‘the playroom is actually a symbol for
Conradin’s twisted character’ could have been usefully pursued further.

The Bath is a short story speaking of the struggles of old age. The author writes of an old woman
who despises having to go fix a bath, due to the physical and psychological challenges it presents.
The woman is depicted as a lonely and melancholic person. Her attitudes to the world are made
evident by the author’s descriptions of her visits to the graves and her time in the bath tub.
The predominant emotion that the old woman is experiencing is loneliness. This is displayed in
several cases, such as when she cannot get out of the bath tub, and she thinks to herself ‘if John
were here … this would never have happened.’ She seems to yearn for some companionship, and
wistfully thinks about what could have been. Another sentence suggests that she is lonely, ‘No one
had heard her … no one knew that she was imprisoned.’ This gives the reader the impression that
the old woman seems to long for somebody, anybody, but is completely isolated from everyone,
and so she is captures in a ‘prison’ of loneliness, and she cannot escape from it. In addition to
indicators such as the aforementioned, the woman often visits a graveyard, which tells the reader
that she misses someone who has passed, and tries to be close to those she loves, but the only
way to do so is by approaching his or her grave.
Comment
The candidate’s analysis of the second story, The Bath, also provides considerable insight into the
characterisation of the elderly woman: ‘Another sentence suggests she is lonely, “No one had heard
her…no one knew she was imprisoned”…she is completely isolated from everyone, and so she is
captured in a ‘prison’ of loneliness, and she cannot escape from it.’
The old woman seems to hold dignity very highly since even though she is in this dilapidated state,
she does not want a nurse yet. She thinks ‘submitting to that will be the first humiliation.’ The
woman also shows that she is pessimistic by nature. When her niece speaks of the clouds and how
beautiful they are, she replies by saying – ‘I never look at the clouds!’ this may be due to her physical
condition, but it also seems symbolic, to convey that rather than looking up, and being joyful, the
woman prefers to engage in noticing ‘cracks and hollows in the footpath … the potholes in the
roads’ and such other things. This may be representative of her worldview; that she seems to focus
on negatives rather than positives in life.
Comment
The candidate offers a convincingly perceptive response to the woman’s statement that she never looks
at the clouds: ‘[This]…seems to be symbolic, to convey that rather than looking up, and being joyful, the
woman prefers to engage in ‘noticing cracks and hollows in the footpath…the potholes in the road…”
This may be representative of her worldview: that she seems to focus on negatives rather than positives
in life.’
The author allows the reader to get a viewpoint on the protagonist and her attitudes by depicting
her in her most vulnerable form: naked and exposed to the struggles of her age, in the bath. The
bath seems to be the antagonist of the story, as the woman struggles to escape it, and dreads
entering it. It seems to be a symbol for the death of the woman’s husband – when she is in it, she
dreams of sorrow and helplessness, and struggles to exit its confines.
Lastly, the woman seems like she wants to be dead, or in other cases feels like she is dead. I believe
she wants to pass on because every day and every moment is a battle, and she is tired of fighting.
She also constantly makes allusions to the fact that she is dead or will die soon, such as ‘the

feeling of being under the earth.’ This phrase suggests that it is describing a coffin, that according
to Christian norms is buried in the ground.
The author shows that the old woman has a pessimistic attitude towards life, probably formed due
to her terrible loneliness, and poor conditions of living.
Both stories illustrate that loneliness, and the circumstances in your life, can shape your
character and transcend differences in age.
Word count, 1186
Bibliography:
Frame, Janet. “The Bath” Stories of Ourselves: The University of Cambridge International
Examinations Anthology of Stories in English. By University of Cambridge. Cambridge UP, 2013
Print
Munroe, Hector. H. “Sredni Vashtar” Stories of Ourselves: The University of Cambridge International
Examinations Anthology of Stories in English. By University of Cambridge. Cambridge UP, 2013
Print
Summative comment
The response clearly meets the descriptors in Band 2 – and there is sufficient additional insight and
sensitivity to place this response in Band 1, with 24 marks.
Script 3
How do the poets convey the impact of torture on the human mind?
‘Africa’ and ‘Requiem: Prologue’ are poems about mental and physical torment acknowledging
people who were in difficult situations of suffering in Africa and Russia respectively. ‘Africa’ is a
poem which shows the contrast of how Westerners changed the beauty of a continent into a land
filled with bloodshed along with natives too shocked and grieved to express their suffering through
the acts of slavery. ‘Requiem: Prologue’ focuses more on how the long hours of waiting for the
women outside the prisons has taken a mental toll on them, suggesting that they are suffering
more psychologically than physically.
‘Africa’ is based on the invasion of Abyssinia by Mussolini and his men. The poem acknowledges
the conquest and enslavement of the great continent as a product of immense suffering as the
Europeans had complete dominance over the Africans. Written in three stanzas, the second
stanza being the shortest, indicates to the reader that the invasion was short but the aftermath
of it took longer to forget, implying that the impact of suffering was too great for many people,
suggested by Tagore writing “The hobnailed boots of your violators/Stuck gouts of that stinking
mud/Forever on your stained history.”
In ‘Africa’ the brutality of the acts committed against the continent is emphasized in stanza
two by “Others came with iron manacles/with clutches sharper than the claws of your own wild
wolves:”. The metaphor compares restraint devices to wolves’ claws to emphasise that those in
the manacles are victims, and ‘claws’ suggests the physical pain of such restraints. The diction

“wolves” highlights the predatory instincts of the European. This barbarity is further expressed
by the oxymoronic image “civilization’s barbarous greed” as rather than bringing enlightenment
civilization here brings slavery and ruin. Tagore uses oxymoron to invert the very definition of
civilization suggesting a civilization for the Westerners is one where the people of a lower power
suffer
In stanza two, Tagore describes how the torment has stopped the entire development of the
continent; that the enslavement and pain ends the natural beauty and evolution of it. This is
intensified as Tagore mentions “Flaunted in its naked humanity”, contrasting the images of
torment with those when Africa was first developing into a beautiful continent. By illustrating the
Westerner’s greed as ‘flaunted’ and ‘naked’, Tagore emphasises that they tormented the Africans
freely, provoking fear into them and showing no mercy.
The suffering inflicted on Africa and its awful impact is further developed in Tagore’s use of sound
devices. The alliteration in “wailed wordlessly” enhances the tone of anguish with the repetition of
the long ‘w’ sound, reflecting the psychological suffering of the Africans. This is further reinforced
by the onomatopoeia ‘wailed’, which is an intense sound of agony. The addition of ‘wordlessly’ in the
alliteration means without language, insinuating that those who were tormented had the inability
to speak and express their severe pain. We get a sense of how this sound of wailing cannot even
be expressed, despite its intensity is like the “slavers came and created not only anguish by their
abuses of power, but also took away the victims’ ability to voice their pain.
Comment
After a general introduction, the essay takes each poem in turn. There is a convincing response to the
content of the poems and a detailed exploration of poetic effects. At its best, the analysis of effects is
precise and specific: ‘The metaphor [comparing “iron manacles” to “wolves’ claws”] emphasizes that
those in the manacles are victims, and “claws” suggests the physical pain of such restraints.’ Similarly,
there is effective analysis of the effects of sound devices in the fifth paragraph.
Tagore uses a colon at the end of the line “Others came with iron manacles,/with clutches sharper
than the claws of your own wild wolves:” to insist that this action triggered other reactions that
sealed the collapse of the continent and unbearable suffering for many. The different sentence
structures are used to emphasize the collapse of the continent as there are short sentences in
between longer sentences representing the instability. Tagore also shows how abuses on people
leads to further abuses and as this escalates entire peoples are thrust into torment.
Comment
Occasionally general assertion struggles to convince: e.g. ‘The different sentence structures are used
to emphasize the collapse of the content as there are short sentences in between the longer ones
representing the instability’.
In contrast, ‘Requiem: Prologue’ is a poem written during the Yezhov terror in Leningrad city as
women waited in queues at the prisons to say goodbye to their loved ones. The title ‘Prologue’
represents a separate introductory section of a literary, dramatic or musical work. By using this
as the title, Anna Akhmatova emphasizes to the reader that this is the beginning of the suffering
in Leningrad. The form of the poem further intensifies this as it is written in one continuous stanza,
suggesting that the suffering brought among the narrator is without pause.

In ‘Prologue’ the diction “writhed”, an action of making twisting, squirming movements or

contortions of the body, emphasizes the struggle and pain suffered throughout Leningrad. Writhed
is often used when someone is on the ground in agony therefore portraying that many Russians
felt helpless and put down during the Yezhov terror. This is illustrated further when Akhmatova
writes “In those years only the dead smiled.” This personifies the dead as smiling suggesting that
they are relieved that they do not have to bear the torture anymore.
The immense suffering in Leningrad is emphasized in the symbolism “Stars of death”. This opposes
the true meaning of stars as they are often associated with hope and navigation This therefore
suggests that the stars are directing them to death thus leaving them hopeless Furthermore,
Akhmatova uses a metaphor in “Railway-yards were asylums” to compare railway yards to
asylums. This insinuates that the yards held mass amounts of people that suffered mentally
instead of physically, suggesting many ordinary people have gone mad.
Another figure of speech in “Short were locomotives’/Farewell songs” personifies the locomotives
as singing. The whistles of the locomotives are described as farewell songs because people will
associate the whistles as the last time they see a certain family member or friend. The word
“short” also indicates that the locomotives abruptly ended close relationships between families
and friends.
The caesura in “Glad to be at rest:” intensifies the amount of suffering in Leningrad. The colon is
used to introduce and prove the main point of why people might be glad to be dead as following
this line are points to prove it. Structural devices also help develop the impression of gloom. The
amount of points listed indicates that the brutality and torture lasted a long time.
Tagore and Akhmatova acknowledge times of suffering in both of their respective poems. Tagore
writes how human greediness and abuses of power can stop a whole continent from developing
while Akhmatova writes how a city can become so dependent on a facility that is used to house
criminals. Through poems such as ‘Africa’ and ‘Prologue’, new generations can see how the powerful
can create suffering on someone else of a lower power, in some cases, fatally. The portrayals of
anguish shown in both poems create images hopelessness and despair which in my opinion show
both places in conditions of instability. This also reflects the mental state of the victims, as they
too are unstable. Through the study of these two poems, my understanding and response to the
unfairness is that the satisfaction of a human being will never be fulfilled. No matter who you are,
you will always end up wanting more.
Comment
The analysis of the second poem is less effectively developed. There is still a critical understanding of
content and methods in evidence but the analysis is not sustained.
Word count, 1150
Bibliography:
Akhmatova, Anna, ‘Requiem: Prologue’ from Selected Poems, Vintage Books 2009, translated by
Thomas, D.M
Tagore, Rabindranath, ‘Africa’ from Selected Poems, Penguin Classics 2005, translated by Radice,
William

Summative comment
On balance, this is a Band 2 response in which well-selected references support a clear critical response.
There is some evidence of a sensitive response to the ways in which the poets achieve their effects. It
achieved 21 marks.
Script 4
To what extent does Ibsen make you sympathise with Krogstad and his actions in A Doll’s House?
Comment
This is an effective task which focuses on the playwright’s techniques in gaining the audience’s
sympathy: ‘To what extent does Ibsen make you sympathise with…?’
Throughout A Doll’s House, Ibsen reveals aspects of Krogstad’s past to show the audience
Krogstad’s motives behind his actions. Through the enlightenment of his past and present, the
audience sympathises with but also distrusts the character Krogstad. Although Krogstad
is originally presented as a hostile character, Ibsen exposes that he has endured a rough and
burdensome past. Ibsen shows that even though Krogstad tries to build himself a new reputation,
his errors from the past still follow him. The audience’s feelings towards Krogstad change
throughout the novel, due to what is unveiled to them about Krogstad and also how he is regarded
by other characters.
Krogstad is first presented, by Dr Rank, as a “twisted” “moral cripple”. The use of the word
“cripple”, represents someone who is flawed and impaired, this shows that society and the other
characters believe that Krogstad is disabled as he doesn’t fit in with their ideals of society
due to his crime. Moreover, the use of “twisted” shows that he is unscrupulous and ominous.
Furthermore, Krogstad is called a “creature” which shows that society views him as an animal,
which is contorted, with no moral standards, therefore inhuman. Lastly the audience is shown from
the start that Krogstad is contorted as his name itself means “crooked”. This gives the view that
Krogstad is a deleterious person with “no moral obloquies”, therefore they don’t sympathise with
him, as they see he is callous.
Comment
The essay demonstrates a clear understanding of Ibsen’s portrayal of Krogstad: ‘originally presented as
a hostile character [whose] errors from the past still follow him’. The argument is well-developed and
supported by relevant reference e.g. ‘the use of “twisted” shows that he is unscrupulous and ominous.
Furthermore, Krogstad is called a “creature” which shows that society views him as an animal, which is
contorted, with no moral standards, therefore inhuman.’ The candidate’s judgement that he is ‘ominous’
could have been further developed and supported.
Due to Krogstad’s past actions, other characters such as Torvald, feel “physically ill” in his
presence. This shows his past behaviour disgusted society to such an extent that its makes
them sick. It is clear that his “indiscretion” was unacceptable and obscene; therefore society
disapproves of and treats him like someone from a lower class. The audience sympathises with
Krogstad, as they understand he has lead a turbulent life trying to change and better his past
reputation.

In Act Two of the play Torvald gives Krogstad “the sack” although he admits that he is “efficient”
at his job and that he is able to forgive his “moral obloquies”. This shows that Torvald’s grounds
for dismissing Krogstad were unsubstantial, as he was being “petty” over the fact that Krogstad
was being too sociable and that he would eventually make Torvald’s “position intolerable”. Ibsen
makes the audience sympathise with Krogstad as he has tried his best to save his job just to
unnecessarily be “chucked back into the mud” as his childhood friendship was “regretful” and
distasteful.
As Krogstad loses his “humble position” at the bank he oppresses Nora into helping him “get to the
top”, by threatening to show Torvald the “I.O.U.”. Krogstad states that he was led into blackmailing
Nora as he was “forced” by Torvald, after being dismissed from his job. Krogstad shows that by any
means he will “fight for his little job” to regain not “just the money” but also the little bit of respect,
honour and dignity, as Krogstad just “like Helmer desires social position and prestige above all
things”. The audience sympathises with Krogstad, as he shows that he is determined to fight for
his reputation although being assertive.
Throughout the play, Ibsen slowly reveals Krogstad’s past. Although the audience is informed
about different aspects of Krogstad and his past the main dilemma that has caused him his
present problems is his “indiscretion”. Due to Krogstad’s mistake he has been in “hard straights”
and has been, repeatedly, “chucked” “into the mud”. This displays to the audience the hardship
Krogstad has had to endure just to keep his job and provide for his family. Krogstad’s reason for
being motivated to continue is his children. Krogstad keeps a positive attitude as “for their sake,
[he] must try to regain as much respectability as [he] can”. As his children are growing older,
Krogstad doesn’t want their future to be affected by his past mistake and he doesn’t want to be
remembered, by them, as immoral. Once again this shows that despite Krogstad having struggled
he still strives to become a better person. This makes the audience sympathise with Krogstad, as
he is humanised by the fact that he wants to give his children better future.
Krogstad has a disadvantage, in society, due to his position, therefore he is not trusted with
much and is kept on a “good watch” to prevent him from corrupting anything else. This shows that
even after being forgiven, Krogstad is still observed just in case he does something atrocious and
irrational again. “Watch” has an underlying tone, which suggests that his every move is surveyed,
like a prisoner. This re-portrays to the audience the distrust the society still has towards
Krogstad.
Towards the end of the play when Krogstad and Mrs Linde meet, Krogstad declares he is a
“shipwrecked man” as he has no one to care for. The word shipwrecked means someone who is
lost, drowning and has been abandoned, with little hope of survival. The use of the phrase portrays
Krogstad in a very precise manner as Krogstad has been abandoned by his society and is searching
for something to cling onto and survive, much like a “shipwrecked man”. Eventually the “spar” that
he has found to cling to is the act of blackmail, as it was his only option to survive and to not, once
again, be cast away by society. This makes the audience sympathise with Krogstad as it shows
that his only salvation was the unethical act of blackmail.
At the end of the play Ibsen makes the audience sympathise with Krogstad, the stage villain, as
they see that the emotional despair humanises him and gives them different view to Krogstad’s
actions and cynicism. Krogstad realises that it was a lapse in judgment to blackmail and get
revenge on the Helmers, as he sees he just needed someone, Mrs Linde, to love. At this part

the audience is introduced to the other side of Krogstad, who is usually portrayed as a serious
businessman. In Krogstad’s love-stuck state, after Mrs Linde and him “join hands” again, he
realises that he made a mistake by giving the Helmers the “I.O.U”. He realises that his actions were
only out of “despair” as he was lost, confused and upset due to the loss of his job. Krogstad now
wants to “undo” his actions as it might harm the Helmers whole relationship since Torvald is a law-
abiding person who would not accept or tolerate illegal actions. Now that Krogstad has someone
who believes in him, the audience see a drastic change in the character, as he “has never been so
happy in [his] life before”. Although the audience doesn’t feel sympathy for Krogstad, they are
elated for Mrs Linde and Krogstad’s reconnection and they realise that the Helmers have to pay
the price for Nora’s recklessness.
Due to Krogstad’s “indiscretion” he has been held back and cast away by society his whole life,
which, due to him being desperate and in “despair”, makes him do regretful things. In spite this,
Ibsen makes the audience sympathise with Krogstad as they, through his love for Mrs Linde, are
shown a more affectionate person, therefore his original role of a traditional villain, in a melodrama,
is abolished.
Word count, 1210
Bibliography:
Non & Nick Worrall, “A Doll’s House”: Metheun drama student edition, Metheun (1985)
Frances Gray, “A Doll’s House”: York Notes Advanced, York Notes (2008)
Summative comment
Sometimes the candidate missed opportunities to explore the effects of particular words and phrases and
their impact on an audience, for example, the brief quotations given in the fourth paragraph.
Generally, the question is kept in sight. The response shows a clear understanding supported by relevant
references. There is a response to the ways in which the dramatist achieves his effects, but this could be
sustained more effectively, for example, by commenting on the particular effects created by the words
quoted.
This is a secure Band 3 response, securing 19 marks.
Script 5
How do the poets present the idea of death in Because I could not stop for death (by Emily
Dickinson) and Mid-Term Break (by Seamus Heaney)?
Emily Dickinson explores death from the view of the traveller, the one who is dying in ‘Because
I could not stop for death,’ She shows the journey one undertakes to reach death and the
acceptance of it Death in Dickinson’s poem is a natural, inescapable occurrence. In ‘Mid Term Break’
Seamus Heaney explores death from the view of a witness, one who is bound to watch from a
distance as he comes to terms with the loss of his younger brother. Death in this poem comes as a
disruption to the speaker’s normal life. Heaney uses imagery to emphasize the shocking tragedy of
this death. The idea of death is presented differently in both poems, one as an acceptable almost
alluring event and the other as a sombre tragedy.

Comment
The task has a clear focus on poetic methods. After a general comparative introduction, the candidate
takes each poem in turn. The essay is a well-developed response which shows a clear understanding of
the content and some of the techniques of each poem.
In Dickinson’s ‘Because I could not stop for death’ she compares death to a male suitor pursuing
the speaker. Death is personified immediately when in line two, Dickinson refers to death as ‘He.’ In
the first stanza, a meeting between two lovers is invoked. ‘Because I could not stop for Death - he
kindly stopped for me’ the word death here could be easily replaced by the name of a male for the
opening lines of a poem about lovers. Death as a suitor is charming and alluring and is described in
line eight as both ‘courteous’ and ‘civil’. By describing death as courteous and civil, death becomes
far more palatable rather than the bitter pill it often is.
Dickinson uses many metaphors in this poem to make death more acceptable to the reader. A
carriage ride becomes a metaphor for the journey towards death, the setting sun is a metaphor
for the end of the speaker’s life and a house is a metaphor for the speaker’s grave. A carriage is a
form of transportation, which links death and travelling together, ultimately conveying the speaker
towards her final resting place. The notion of motion is enhanced by the mention of things that are
passed along the journey, ‘We passed the School.’ On a journey towards death one would reflect
upon their life. Passing the school represents the speaker’s reflections of her childhood as she is
dying. The structure Dickinson uses also helps to add to the idea of movement Generally, Dickinson
follows a pattern whereby a line of eight syllables is followed by a line of six syllables. This gives the
poem a rhythm, which adds emphasis to the idea of a journey as carriages move rhythmically and
this rhythm is repetitive.
Comment
Occasionally the approach taken relies too heavily on assertion: e.g. ‘A carriage ride becomes a metaphor
for the journey towards death, the setting sun is a metaphor for the end of the speaker’s life and a house
is a metaphor for the speaker’s grave.’
The candidate’s comment on the use of structure in the Dickinson poem is generalised: ‘…a line of eight
syllables is followed by a line of six syllables. This gives the poem a rhythm, which adds emphasis to the
idea of a journey as carriages move rhythmically and this rhythm is repetitive.’
The journey finally comes to an end when the carriage pauses at a house, ‘We paused before a House
that seemed.’ The house is a metaphor for the speaker’s final resting place. Like an unmarked grave,
it can barely be discerned, ‘A Swelling of the Ground’ the house appears normal except that it is
underground. ‘The Roof was scarcely visible -The Cornice- in the Ground.’ The choice of the house
as a metaphor makes the idea of burial far less frightening than the idea of being buried in a coffin.
The setting sun here is also a metaphor for death. In lines twelve to thirteen, the sun passes
the carriage. ‘We passed the Setting Sun’. The setting sun is a symbol of a life ending. The arrival
of night symbolizes the arrival of death. The idea of a setting sun makes death seem peaceful.
Death is presented as a carriage ride with a courteous and civil companion with time enough for
reflections on life, ending at an underground house. Death is presented as almost alluring and
serene.

In ‘Mid Term Break’ Heaney presents death as a tragic, disruptive and sombre event that turns life
completely on its head. A young man’s life is shockingly turned upside down by the tragic death of
his younger brother. The disruptions to his life come in several forms. A mid term break is always
a disruption, generally a pleasant one but immediately in line three, when the speaker is collected
from school by his neighbours we assume this disruption is out of the ordinary, ‘our neighbours
drove me home.’ Under normal circumstances, parents would collect their children from boarding
school so immediately we are given the sense that something out of the ordinary had occurred to
disrupt the normal pattern of things. The next and far more shocking disturbance occurs when he
comes face to face with his crying father. We realise how disturbing this is when Heaney mentions
his father’s usual stoicism, ‘He had always taken funerals in his stride-’ Father’s are generally
seen as the source of strength and stability in a family. To witness the usually unshakeable
father weeping would be hugely traumatic. Adding to the speaker’s disorientation, he is suddenly
elevated to the status of an adult, ‘By old men standing up to shake my hand.’ Older men whom
generally the speaker would be expected to treat with deference and respect are suddenly shaking
his hand and paying him their respects. Finally, offering comfort to his mother instead of the
other way around, ‘as my mother held my hand, In hers and coughed out angry tearless sighs.’ In
normal circumstances, when a mother holds a child’s hand it is to offer comfort and solace to the
child. Here however, the mother is seeking comfort from her child. Heaney shows how death is a
disruption to the point where things are turned completely on their head.
Heaney uses imagery in ‘Mid Term Break’ to emphasize the tragedy of the truncated life of the
speaker’s younger brother. In line two, Heaney refers to ‘bells knelling’ instead of ringing. The use
of the word knelling immediately introduces a sombre mood, as normally this word is associated
with funerals. Heaney uses imagery in the second last stanza to emphasize the shocking tragedy
of his brother’s premature death. He describes the only visible damage to his brother as a ‘poppy
bruise.’ Comparing the bruise to a flower that is traditionally associated with dead young soldiers
it emphasizes the tragedy of this loss. The imagery of the coffin as a ‘cot’ is quite jarring. Although
it implies the child is asleep, resting rather than dead the speaker knows this not to be the case.
The image of the bumper hitting the child hard enough to knock him clear is incredibly shocking. Cut
flowers and candles are both things that have short lives. ‘Snowdrops and candles soothed the
bedside’. The image of these two things by the bedside adds emphasis to the tragedy. The final
stanza is the only stanza that.is two lines and it is a strong ending to the poem.
Comment
The essay is at its strongest when exploring the precise effects of words and sounds e.g. ‘Heaney refers
to the “bells knelling” instead of ringing. The use of the word “knelling” immediately introduces a sombre
mood, as normally this word is associated with funerals.’ Here, the effects of language and structure are
considered.
The writers use different literary devices to achieve their different ends. In Dickinson’s ‘Because
I could not stop for death’ we travel with a woman on her journey towards death. In Heaney’s
‘Mid Term Break’ we witness a young man struggle following the death of his younger brother and
the impact that it has on his family. Heaney uses imagery to convey death as a disruption, and
Dickinson used metaphors and personification to help convey death as a journey.
Word count, 1189

Bibliography:
Because I could not stop for death -Emily Dickinson
Songs of Ourselves: The Cambridge International Examinations Anthology of Poetry in English
Mid Term Break- Seamus Heaney
Death of a Naturalist, Faber and Faber Poetry 2006
Summative comment
This is a Band 3 response, showing a clear understanding and supported by relevant references. It
achieved 18 marks.
Script 6
How do the poets convey what is wrong with the way humans treat the earth in Lament (by Gillian
Clarke) and Report to Wordsworth (by Boey Kim Cheng)?
‘Lament’ by Gillian Clark and ‘Report to Wordsworth’ by Boey Kim Cheng are poems that highlight
what is wrong with the way humans treat the earth. The title ‘Lament’ suggests that there is
a long list of lamented people, events, creatures and things that have been destroyed, or in the
process of being destroyed, by humans. The point Clarke is trying to get across to the world is
to help save what is left of Nature. Clarke is showing the numerous things wrong with the world
in a very interesting way. ‘Report to Wordsworth’ is a poem that tells how the world is now and
expressing her feelings that Nature is heading for an even dark cloud.
Comment
The task has a clear focus on poetic methods: ‘How do the poets convey…?’ After a general introduction
mentioning both poems, the response tackles each poem in turn.
In ‘Lament’, Clarke sets a dominant feeling for the entire poem, death. Throughout the entire poem
she shows the violent way we treat earth and desperately tries to bring an end to the destruction
by creating many horrific images, for example, “For the solider with his uniform on fire” and “For her
eggs laid in their nest of sickness”. This poem is structured as a list of “sadness”, involving innocent
people and creatures. Every verse and eleven lines begin with “For”, and this poem does not have a
regular rhyming scheme; it’s very unpredictable.
In Stanza one, she writes about the green turtle in desperate search for a place in which to lay
her eggs. The ‘burden’ refers to the heavy load of the eggs that she is carrying. “Pulsing burden,”
conveys a sense of urgency in laying the eggs that is causing her trouble. The metaphor “nest of
sickness” conveys the feeling that war has reached so far that there is not a safe place left in
which to dig a nest. In the second stanza “…Cormorant in his funeral silk” represents how Nature
once again is dying. The oil covers their feathers, rendering them flightless and the silk represents
the thick black oil suffocating the Cormorant. Recent man-made shipping disasters include
the Exxon Valdez Disaster and Deep water Horizon oil spill in 2010. These are examples of her
prophesy. She also describes the people that should not be lamented for example the gunsmith
and the armorer. She shows them as evil because they seem to be encouraging the war and
shows how they are the ones destroying the environment, yet the poet mentions them and their

ignorance, they seem to not realize that they could be killed by one of their creations the bombing.
“The veil of iridescence on the sand” and “the shadow on the sea” paint the spreading stain of oil.
In stanza three “mortal stain” is used to describe the war as a ‘stain’ that blemishes everyone’s
heart and causes death to all living things and their surroundings. In this stanza, the poet, Clarke
moves from the environmental cost of war to the human cost. “Ahmed” was soldier who was burnt
when his tank was bombed - “uniform of fire”.
The use of the semantic field of jobs related to war: “gunsmith”, “armorer”, “fusilier”, “company” is
highlighted in stanza four: the “boy fusilier who joined for the company” and “the farmers son in it
for the music”, came from hearing radio interviews. This stanza illustrates the impact of war on
childhood innocence. The fifth stanza illustrates the power of the underwater weapons and how
they wreak havoc on the eco-location senses for whales. The underwater explosions disorientate
the whales causing them to beach. Turtles too, return to their nesting grounds by relying on
markers. Bombs and torpedo’s destroy these. The sixth stanza continues with the idea of how war
disrupts the long distance flights of migratory birds. The “veiled sun” is used to describe how a veil
of smoke hides the sun and only the “stink of anger” is left.
In the final stanza the image of fierce heat given off by war is described, “burn earth”, “scalded
ocean”, “blazing well’. All are adjectives used to emphasize the feeling of heat and fire. In the last
line the poet is trying to illustrate that all communication is dead during war as well as all the lives
of many innocent people and creatures. The ash of language is a very powerful image. This phrase
shows the breakdown of communication that the war has put upon the world
Comment
For the poem Lament, the candidate makes valid comments about the structure of the poem and
explores some of the language used in the poem: e.g. ‘The metaphor “nest of sickness” conveys the
feeling that there is not a safe place left in which to dig a nest.’ At times, the approach is descriptive and
explanatory rather than closely analytical: for example, in paragraph four reference is made to ‘a semantic
field of jobs related to war’ and a list of suitable words is given. However, there is no close analysis of
effects created by the particular words; they are merely listed.
‘Report to Wordsworth’ is very similar to Lament as both poems describe how nature has gone
down a dark road. This poem echo’s Wordsworth’s many poems. It is very dramatic in how he uses
many similes making the piece much more adequate. The first stanza starts with a direct echo of
Wordsworth’s “Milton! Thou shouldst be living at this hour: England hath need of thee: she is a fen”
This adds importance to both their openings, making the piece start off really strong to captures
the reader’s attention.
The themes of Wordsworth’s poem in which he regrets the passing of certain things are similar to
Cheng’s. Wordsworth’s, ‘We are selfish men’, is reflected in ‘insatiate man moves in for the kill’. In the
lines 5-10 the references to the sea gods are in-direct reference to Wordsworth’s poem, ‘it moves
us not. -- Great God! I’d rather be a Pagan suckled in the creed outworn: So might I, standing on this
pleasant lea Have glimpses that would make me less forlorn; Have sight of Proteus rising from the
sea; Or hear old Triton blow his wreathed horn.”
Comment
A descriptive approach is clearly evident in the third paragraph from the end of the essay, explaining
(briefly) the references to Greek mythology in Report to Wordsworth.

Cheng, however departs from Greek mythology to present day with his image of the beached whale
and man moving in for the kill. In lines 7-8, Triton was the son of Poseidon – he stilled the waves
by blowing conch shell trumpets. As with the image of the whale above, Cheng brings twentieth-
century reality to the mythology as he shows the effects of pollution. Finally in lines 13-14, Cheng
talks about the ozone layer as a wound widening in the sky which ends the poem with the disaster
getting worse and worse.
He also uses a lot of personification to make readers feel more sympathy for the problems. For
example as he refers to nature with a capital letter, “Nature hath need of you”. This captures the
reader’s attention and makes them take it more seriously.
These two poems represent how nature is dying minute by minute. They try to show the world the
horrors of their own actions. They help us understand that it should stop before we have nothing
left.
Word count, 1077
Summative comment
On balance, the essay shows an understanding of the deeper implications of the poems’ content and
makes some response to language. This is a reasonably developed rather than well-developed personal
response, placing it in Band 4 with 16 marks.
Script 7
Explore how Heaney portrays the relationship between father and son in Digging and Follower.
“Digging” and “Follower” by Seamus Heaney both discuss the relationship between a father and a
son, but these poems reflect a different relationship between father and son. “Follower” reflects
in a close relationship between father and son that is loving and supportive, whereas in “Digging”,
the son admires the father’s skill and tenacity. In these poems, Seamus Heaney has used various
poetic techniques, which have enhanced the reader’s understanding adding emphasis at special
points in the story.
In ‘Digging’, a narrative poem related in first person, Seamus Heaney has organised his ideas into a
free verse format, with an effective opening and ending. ‘Digging’ begins with a couplet; the number
of lines increasing progressively in the first four stanzas, as the speaker builds a description
of his father showing the reader his admiration for his father; he then introduces the speaker’s
grandfather who he continues to describe in the next octave, as a similarly hard-working man. The
speaker finally speaks about himself in the last two stanzas. The repetition of “Between my finger
and my thumb The squat pen rests”; emphasises the lines and connects the beginning and the end
of the poem. The poet has used enjambents, such as “The coarse boot nestled on the lug, the shaft
Against the inside knee was levered firmly” increases the pace of reading; and caesurae, “For the
good turf. Digging.” pauses the reader and emphasises ‘digging. In the first half of the poem, the
speaker reminisces about his father and shows his admiration in the words “By God, the old man
could handle a spade Just like his old man”. Here, the speaker changes the topic of description
from the speaker’s father to the speaker’s grandfather. The words “My grandfather cut more turf
in a day Than any other man on Toner’s bog” indicate the extent of the speaker’s admiration for
his grandfather. The final two stanzas reveal the speaker’s hidden guilt because he has described

the succession of farmers in his family, namely his father and grandfather but he doesn’t want to
carry on this tradition. This is evident in the words “But I’ve no spade to follow men like them”; in
the last stanza he justifies his choice and shows his determination to succeed as a writer. Seamus
Heaney uses onomatopoeia, alliteration and rhyme to breathe life into the poem. The speaker uses
an onomatopoeia when describing his father working outside, his spade makes a “rasping sound”
adding emphasis to the ‘s’ in both words, enabling the reader to think what it could sound like.
These words alliterate with ‘spade sinks’ in the next line, allowing the reader to create a connection
between the phrases creating a rhythm in the words. Heaney also uses rhyme to create a rhythm,
emphasising the sound ‘ound’ and it combines with the enjambement to create overall cohesion
in the stanza. The speaker uses imagery to great effect; “Snug as a gun” likens the pen that
the speaker is holding to a gun, just like a finger is comfortable on the trigger of a gun, it is also
comfortable on a pen. This phrase also symbolises the power that the pen possess and it has the
potential to be used as a weapon. “Through living roots awaken in my head” personifies the roots as
symbolising the family roots, which the speaker feels strongly about.
Comment
The task has a suitable focus. The response shows an understanding of meanings, with occasional
evidence of grasping deeper implications. However, the essay tends to log poetic features: free verse,
couplet, repetition, enjambments, caesura etc. Quotations are not used to sustain an analysis of effects;
the approach is explanatory.
FoIIower’ is a free verse poem, related in first person. All stanzas in ‘Follower’ are quatrains, a group
of four lines; the first three stanzas describe his father as an experienced farmer, skilled with
horses and plough with meticulous precision, allowing a clearer understanding of the speaker’s
father’s abilities as a farmer. The last three stanzas are used to describe the speaker following
his father as a child; he would ride on his father’s back, always tripping and stumbling behind, this
gives the reader the impression that the speaker is a small boy following his father around. This
structure shows a chronology of events. Heaney has authored an effective ending; it creates
sympathy in the reader for the characters; the speaker was always stumbling as a child but his
father had created a strong impression on him that he would always be there for his son in spirit,
in the speaker’s mind and heart. “All I ever did was follow In his broad shadow round the farm”;
this enjambement increases the speed of reading to target emphasis onto “An expert.” Heaney
also used caesurae, for example “sometimes on the polished sod;” which applies the emphasis to
“Sometimes he rode me on his back Dipping and rising to his plod.” The speaker feels a strong sense
of love for his father; consequently the speaker wanted to become a farmer just like his father, this
is evident in the words “All I ever did was follow In his broad shadow round the farm”. This suggests
that his father was his role model. The reader becomes emotionally attached to the characters
in the poem, namely the speaker and his father. The onomatopoeia “clicking tongue” is easy to
visualise for the reader and is very audible as you read. The alliteration “fit the bright steel-pointed
sock” adds emphasis to the alliterated letter, ‘t’; creating rhythm. Heaney has also created a
rhyming pattern; in stanzas 1,4,5 and 6, lines 2 and 4 rhyme, whereas in stanzas 2 and 3, lines 1
and 3 rhyme; this combined with the alliteration creates rhythm making the poem more appealing
when read, due to the sound patterns. Seamus Heaney uses a simile to create an image in the
reader’s mind; “shoulders globed like a full sail strung”, likening the father’s globing shoulders to a
sail. This makes the reader visualise his father as being a muscular man with broad shoulders.

Comment
Towards the end of the penultimate paragraph, the language comments become quite fragmented and
not always secure: ‘The onomatopoeia “clicking tongue” is easy to visualise for the reader…’; ‘in stanzas
1, 4, 5 and 6, lines 2 and 4 rhyme, whereas in stanzas 2 and 3, lines 1 and 3 rhyme; this combined with
the alliteration creates rhythm making the poem more appealing to read…’
In “Follower”, the relationship between father and son is loving and supportive and the father
guides him, by virtue of the boy’s youth and innocence and the boy grows up, inspired by his father.
However in “Digging”, the relationship between father and son is not as strong as the relationship
in the previous poem, but there is a sense of mutual respect and admiration, allowing the son
to become a writer despite his guilt. His decision to become a writer has possibly created an
awkwardness to their relationship. These poems made me reflect on my own relationship with my
father and made me think back to all the good times we’ve spent together.
Word count, 1074
Bibliography:
Seamus Heaney, Digging, Faber and Faber Poetry 2006 Seamus Heaney, Follower, Faber and Faber
Poetry 2006
Summative comment
The lack of effective development and a clear focus keeps this response low in Band 1 achieving
14 marks.
Script 8
In what way do the poems Plenty (by lsobel Dixon) and the poem My Papa’s Waltz (by Theodore
Roethke) vividly describe their childhood experience?
Dixons poem “Plenty” shows the relationship between a mother and her five daughters. The poet
saying that the children used to run “riot” (2) and this was more than the mother could handle.
The poet talked about the mother’s reaction. She says “Like Mommy’s smile. Her lips stretched
back and anchored down, in anger at some fault” (7-8). The poet talks about that the mothers’ lips
stretch just as much when she smiles, as when she frowns. She compares the smile to the frown,
to still show a little bit of positive energy in the poem. The poet shows us that the situation was
not good.
The family also had a little supply of water. I think this because the poet writes that there was
“drought” (5) and that the “dams leaked dry and windmills stalled” (6). Another example of why
there was a little supply of water was because the tub was never full, as she says” our old enamel
tub, age-stained and pocked, upon its griffin claws, was never full” (3-4). This definitely played a
big role in the family because they were not able to wash themselves properly and have enough
drinking-water.

Comment
The essay shows some understanding of meanings and uses some textual detail for support. For
example, in the second paragraph, quotations are used to illustrate the point about the family’s ‘little
supply of water’. The quotation “our old enamel tub, age-stained and pocked, upon its griffin claws, was
never full” leads to the comment ‘This definitely played a big role in the family because they were not
able to wash themselves properly and have enough drinking-water’.
The poet expresses the father-son relationship in the poem “My Papa’s Waltz”. Since the dance
“Waltz” name is in the title, you would expect that the father and son were dancing in the poem.
In the first stanza, the poet already shows that this “dance” might not be as easy as it sounds.
He says “Such waltzing was not easy.” (4). This shows us that the child’s life was not easy. He had
trouble with his father, the poet writes “The whiskey on your breath, Could make a small boy dizzy;”
(1-2). This could mean that the father was an alcoholic.
The dad keeps missing steps; he also keeps scratching the kid. “The hand that held my wrist was
battered on one knuckle;” (9-10) as you see in line 9-10. This could be the poet saying that the
father makes mistakes in real life. It could also mean that the father could be hurting the child
emotionally.
In stanza 4, the poet talks about the father putting the child to bed. But the child of course
doesn’t want to go to sleep, and is “clinging” to his father’s shirt. “Then waltzed me off to bed, still
clinging to your shirt.” (15-16). In this way the author could be showing that the child still loves his
father, even though the “waltz” has been really hard for the child and the father.
These two poems are very similar, but also very alike. The two poems both have the point of view of
a child. The two children both do not have a really good life. The girl in “Plenty” does not have enough
water and food. In “My Papas Waltz”, we don’t know if they have enough resources because it is not
said. The boy does however have trouble with his father, who is possibly an alcoholic. The poem “My
Papas Waltz” does have more metaphors than the poem “Plenty”.
Word count, 537
Summative comment
The opportunity to explore the precise effects of the adjectives “age-stained” and “pocked” is not taken
up. Other points, too, could be further developed and language analysed in more detail.
This is an essay which ‘begins to develop a response’ which makes it a Band 5 answer with 12 marks.
Script 9
How do poets criticize the environment of Singapore in their poems?
Felix cheong and Simon tay has a attitude of loving the old. They both critises on environment
which is a issue in modern Singapore. Kim cheng and simon tay described old Singapore like a
human, government is killing Singapore and he/she is dying. my guess is that they simply miss
their old Singapore. Both Singapore night song and work in progress is about the negative things
of urbanization. Simon tay does it by describing singapore’s night, while felix cheong does it by

describing construction work in Singapore. I would emphasize more on environment when it comes
to traditionalism vs modernity Thoughout my essay.
Comment
This response shows a basic understanding of content, adopting a somewhat descriptive approach.
The essay focuses more on the topic of the ‘environment of Singapore’ than the poetic techniques
used to ‘criticize the environment of Singapore’. The first paragraph struggles to achieve a clear focus: it
comments that both poems are about ‘the negative things of urbanisation’ and states ‘I would emphasize
more on environment when it comes to traditionalism vs modernity’.
in the poem Singapore night song, the writer constantly tells us how nature got ruined eg “no
owl cries”, because they are dead which little bit tedious because owls don’t live in Singapore.
They start by saying the lack of nature. For example “no owl cries above the sky, the moon does
not dominate.” And for moon is certainly more traditional. for it not to dominate is obviously a
destruction to environment and his eyes of traditionalism is mainly naturalism. he is trying to
say the city lights are so bright that it damage the sky, and that the moonlight is not bright at
all comparing to the city lights. We could see he’s saying this from the sentence “And the moon
does not dominate” Which is true, as cities like Hong Kong and Singapore has a lot of light damage.
And if you have a lot of of city light. It will destroy the atmosphere. And it would be hard for you
to see the stars. The writer uses a good personification “The traffic is the only other animal
awake”, and it describe the cars as a animal. He described the things by listing to show there’s a
lot of city things. By saying traffic is the other animal alive, he is also telling that not all animal
dies, he mentioned in his first sentence “ where no owl cries its kill above city blocks. The owl is a
animal. I think he might be saying that in Singapore our animal are not normal, “walk past merlion”.
a mermaid(who don’t exist) would in some ways reproduce with a lion. He goes on to saying that
trees don’t grow normally here by saying “trees shrug off cement roots,” meaning they grow in the
walk path and not soil. Which is what trees used to grow in. Once again supporting traditionalism.
he’s probably saying that Singapore has way too much foreign talent, “and outside the concert hall,
where no concert is being staged, hear the American top ten spill from a Walkman.” From the words
“American top 10” he’s saying they influence our culture in a way that we forgot our own culture
and listens to American songs and not our own. He might have said this because of Singapore’s
36% foreigners and PRs. And growing to 40% soon because of the white paper.
In the 2nd last paragraph, he is trying to be more positive toward his country “Relish a bite of
satay” Singapore is still some how nationalized and based on our on culture. Moreover those 3
sentence are pretty much to say neutral sentence or in fact relatively positive as it’s relatively
sousing and relaxing to have a walk. And Singapore is quite nice to walk around in night. And you
don’t have to worry about getting robbed, cause it’s a safe city. He probaply thinks that it’s great
for an opposition party to win and he supports progressive and liberal parties more in this last
paragragh “that the sun over telephone wires and sparrows with their gutter songs will eventually
come” probably suggest that singapore democrat or workers or an opposition party would take
over, and he thinks it would be much better. I guessed that he’s an opposition because of his
disagreement with the PAP’s immigration policy I mentioned in 3rd paragraph the words “American
top ten.” And opposition parties are in favor of lesser foreign talent. He’s probroply doesn’t like
opposition parties that much either, because he said “but neither horizons nor thrushes” this
meant that ya, it would be better because there would be sparrows coming with their song, but
not too much better, after all there wont be horizons nor thrushes, he uses thrushes and sparrow

and horizon to describe awesomeness, because he loves nature, and kind of connects the 2nd half
of the 3rd paragraph and first half of the 4th paragraph that is to do with party politics with the
first 2.5 paragraph that is about environmentalism, which is not debated so much by politicians.
And that might also be why he say’s but neither horizons nor thrushes, as opposition parties
doesn’t represent everything he supports either “if you cannot learn to love (yes love this city) you
have no other” this sentence means that by the end of the days he still thinks that this is the best
city in the world and there’s no city better.
The starting sentence of “In working progress”, concludes it’s main content which is that he
doesn’t want change “why this upheaval” Upheaval mean violent change, and from here we could see
that he wants things to be the way it was or currently is. And that he think that change it’s violent.
he also said “it is as constant as our coastline eaten by tides.” So he’s saying that the change
as fast as global warming which he believes to be really fast. He thinks that Singapore is very
crowded and that streets are very small, “chewed and spat” just like food is smaller than mouth.
tells us so, because if something chewed, it’s small, cause you cant chew gigantic things. He is also
portraying that government and corporations will destroy everything old here, not even a dust let.
He said “till the crumbling past is no more than a concert heap.” Crumbling tells us that us that it
is corrupting, and falling that it is gonna be no more. The word heap tells us that no one remembers
it, as no one would remember a pile of heap. He also suggested the development to be for the wrong
reasons. “ready...retrofit” Retro-fit means adding technology to something in this sentence. And
the word ready made it feel like the people don’t decide it, that they have to be ready for it. He says
Singapore is polluted. From the lines” We are a country of dust, the word dust tells us that we are
a polluted city. Because dust is often a symbol for pollution and dirtiness. Once again supporting
the greenish past over the polluted present The words where nothing is saved but face means that
nothing exist in Singapore except for dignity, people and money. Bad environment, no resources,
and not even history.
In conclusion, Singaporeans do write poems in a modem way because we are a new nation after all.
They both criticise that Singapore have too much pollution, Felix cheong is more straight forward
compared to simon tay, simon’s last paragraph and the second half of second last paragraph for
example are more implicit.
Word count, 1200
Summative comment
There are some broadly relevant comments, mainly about themes but there is little explicit engagement
with the ways in which the poets use poetic techniques to convey their meanings and achieve their
effects.
Occasionally a device is mentioned but without detailed analysis e.g. ‘The writer uses a good
personification “The traffic is the only other animal awake”, and it describes the cars as a [sic] animal’.
Overall, this is a Band 6 response showing a basic understanding, achieving 10 marks.

Script 10
Relationships in the novel [The Kite Runner]
The Kite Runner is a novel about friendship, betrayel and the price of loyalty. It is a novel written
by Khaled Hosseini and has reached great success. It is about the bonds between fathers and
sons, and the power of fathers and sons, their love, their sacrifices and their lies. The Kite Runner
describes the rich culture and beauty of a land being destroyed. But through the devastation,
Khaled Hosseini offers hope. The theme of relationships runs throughout the novel, the four main
relationships are; Baba and Amir, Amir and Hassan, Amir and Sohrab and Baba and Hassan.
Comment
The topic is too broad in scope and there is no instruction to explore the qualities of the writing:
‘Relationships in the novel’. The response is largely narrative, with no direct quotation. There are some
relevant comments about ‘relationships’ but they are very general and undeveloped.
The father and son relationship between Baba and Amir is difficult from the start as Amir feels he
is blamed in some way for his mother’s death, by his father. Amir believes that the only way to be
forgiven by his father is to win the kite competition. This way he would win his father’s forgiveness
and love. His attemps of closing the gap between them, pushing aside their differences influences
the events that happen afterwards. Such as his need for the kite to get satisfaction from his
father by winning the competition, over saving his best friend Hassan.
Hassan was loyal to Amir through everything because that is the personality he was born with,
he grew up with Amir and looked up to him as a brother. Not because he was born a Hazara and not
simply because he was Amir’s servant. Amir never asked Hassan to do anything like serveing him.
All of the relationships in this novel are very strong, each one of the main characters have a special
bond with a least one other character. The importance of a few good relationships add up to a well
written storyline, without this the story would not reach such great success. The novel was so well
done that it even got filmed into a successfull movie. Ithink without the strong bonding the story
would not be as good, by having these relationships in the novel you can really see how strongly
Afghan citizens relie on one another. Trust is crucial in Afghanistan because you can never know who
will betray you after all. Betrayel or lying can lead to serious problems, like there was war going on
in Afghanistan because of this.
As the characters grow older, their bonds become stronger. At a certain moment Hassan and Amir
lose contact when Amir imigrates to California, USA. There Amir starts a new chapter of his life,
throughout his time there his father gets sick and dies. Here is where he meets Soraya, his future
wife. After he gets married and fails at his attempt to having children he decides to go back to
Afghanistan to visit his old hometown and see what the Taliban have done to his country.
As he is visiting Afghanistan again he meets Sohrab there, and Sohrab tells Amir that his dear
friend Hassan has passed away. He also tells Amir that Hassan has a son, who was at an orphanage
at the time because the boy had lost both his parents. Amir decides to look for the boy and take
him back with him to California. When he finally found the boy, they grew a strong bond on their way
back to the USA.

The characters all start out young but then grow up being responsible adults. The relationships
is what holds the story together, through good times and the bad times they always have each
others backs. The moral of the story is that even in horrible times like war people know how to take
care of each other and are able to be there for one another. That’s why friendship, love and affection
play a big part in this story.
Word count, 637
Summative comment
This is a Band 6 response showing a basic understanding of the surface meaning of the text; it attempts
to communicate a basic personal response. It achieved 8 marks.

Section 3: The empathic response
3.1 Guidance
For this assignment, learners must assume the voice of one character in a prose or drama text. Tasks should
be framed in such a way that the author’s created world is central to any response. Responses should
assume the voice of a character at a particular moment in a prose or drama text. The most successful
empathic responses integrate a compellingly authentic voice for the character and a wide range of detail
convincingly rooted in the text.
Tasks should not be set at moments well outside the text, nor should they invite students to stray from
the recognisable world of the text. For example, it would be inappropriate to set alternative endings or the
‘voice’ of a character ten years into the future.

The following examples indicate a precise moment for the learner to assume the voice of a particular
character in the prose or drama text. Each task ends with the instruction: ‘Write your thoughts’. This is a
formula that should be adopted by centres.
Hansberry, A Raisin in the Sun

You are Ruth. You are about to depart for the new family home in Clybourne Park.
Write your thoughts.
Ibsen, A Doll’s House

You are Torvald, just after Nora has left.
Kafka, Metamorphosis
You are Grete at the end of the story, after Gregor’s death.
Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

You are the Nurse after Tybalt’s death. Juliet has sent you to find Romeo at Friar Lawrence’s cell.
These are well-framed empathic tasks, and challenging ones. In each task, character and moment are clearly
specified. Even where students cover the same text, the precise choice of character and moment in the
text should be left to the student. Students might be asked to submit their proposed choice of character and
moment to teachers so they can judge whether they are appropriate.
As with the critical essay, students should keep an eye on the word count as they draft and re-draft their
essay. The word count should be indicated at the end of the empathic response. Examiners will not mark
work beyond the word limit.
Remember that candidates must not submit an empathic response task on a text being studied on Paper 3.

3.2 Empathic response – assessment criteria

Band 1 25 Answers in this band have all the qualities of Band 2 work, with further insight,
24 sensitivity, individuality and flair.
23
They sustain an entirely convincing voice.
Band 2 22 Sustains a perceptive, convincing and relevant personal response
21
20 • shows a detailed appreciation of character, rooted in the text
• sustains an engagingly convincing voice
18
17 • shows a clear understanding of character, rooted in the text
• sustains a largely authentic voice
15
14 • shows understanding of character and text, including some of the deeper
implications
• uses suitable features of expression
Band 5 13 Begins to develop a relevant personal response
12
11 • shows some understanding of character and text
• begins to assume a voice appropriate to the character
Band 6 10 Attempts to communicate a basic personal response to the task
9
8 • shows a basic understanding of character and text
Band 7 7 Some evidence of simple personal response to the task

6
5 • shows a few signs of understanding of character’s thoughts or feelings
Band 8 4 Limited attempt to respond

3
2 • shows some limited understanding of character’s thoughts or feelings
Below Band 8 0/0–1 No answer/Insufficient to meet the criteria for Band 8.

3.3 Examples of assignment 2 empathic response

This section contains three examples of assignment 2, together with commentaries on their strengths and
weaknesses.
Script 11
William Golding, Lord of the Flies. Ralph – on the morning after Simon’s death
I stare out at the sea, and it glares back at me, like a beast. Threatening to come on shore and tear
you apart, like it had, last night, in that storm, and torn up Simon, and washed him away.
But no, it wasn’t the beast, or the storm that had killed Simon, it was us.
Don’t know how things could have gotten to this stage. Still remember when we got to this island,
don’t know how long ago that was though a few weeks? A few months? Or even years. Maybe I
should’ve listened to Piggy and made a sun dial, keep track of stuff. But my past life seems too far
away, I can’t even barely remember my house, where I lived, the field, with my pony…they are just
scattered memories now. How am I going to back with only these memories? Oh well, it’s not like
we’ll be likely to get off this island.
At first I thought we’d only be stuck here a while, there’s not a place in the world my dad doesn’t
go, and he’d look for us and then we’d be able to go home. And I thought it was a good island, lots
of trees, lots of fruit, enough for us to live here a long time. I was chief, and I thought everything
would work out fine, like the story in Coral Island, but then all the talk about the beast started. I
didn’t believe it at first, but now I don’t know, it does seem very real, but then last night, we were
supposed to kill the beast, but it turned out to be…Simon.
I dunno what got into me, I really don’t. I think it was that chant, that ever-repeating chant to kill
the beast, spill his blood, cut his throat, kill the beast. It was like a spell, dancing around the fire,
feeling the blood drum against your ears, feel that urge, to hurt, to kill. And the beast came, and
we all went for it, it was so confusing, and I don’t know what happened, just a muddle of firelight
and arms and legs and spears and blood. But at the end of it, I saw ‘the beast’. It was so small for
a beast. I don’t know how we could have mistaken it. And then I saw it being washed away, by those
huge waves slapping at the shore, even now, still slapping, and leaving nothing behind.
It was murder, I know it was murder, no matter what I say, no matter how I think of it, it was murder
and I was a part of it. What has happened to this place? I had tried to keep order, tried to make
us be able to live here, and tried to get us rescued. But Jack has gone and let the fire out, and got
everyone to go hunt pigs like savages. The meat was great, I know, but getting rescued is so much
more important, why don’t they understand?
Looking now, at where the ship has passed before, I know we don’t have a hope. The beast’s on the
mountain, we can’t light a fire for help, and all the others except for Samneric and Piggy and me
have turned into savages and I don’t even know if I’m civilised. We don’t have a way of getting off this
island, we’re gonna be stuck here forever…
Word count, 586

Summative comment
This response captures a very thoughtful Ralph that is appropriate for the moment specified in the task.
The response draws on relevant material from different parts of the novel. There is the immediate past
conveyed in a powerful opening, concluding with the shocked confession to himself: ‘But no, it wasn’t
the beast, or the storm that killed Simon, it was us.’ There is the wistful note concerning the barely-
remembered ‘scattered memories’ and an intelligent grasp of the wider context suggested by the
reference to ‘like the story in Coral Island’.
In spite of a relatively weak final line, this is a response that sustains an entirely convincing voice, with
considerable insight and sensitivity. This is a Band 1 response, achieving 24 marks.
Script 12
Henrik Ibsen, A Doll’s House. Torvald – after Nora has left you
Nora is gone…She truly left. I cannot believe it. Ah, but it has only been fifteen minutes since. The
little child id so frivolous and impulsive; she mustn’t have considered her actions before deciding
to depart. She will be regretting it now, and so she shall return like a terrified song bird back into
my great, strong wings…She must. The feather-brained girl has no hope of survival without me in
her life. I am her protector – her saviour. Yes, she will return – sobbing and begging for forgiveness.
I will have to forgive her, eventually. Of course, one cannot expect a naïve woman to know what she
is doing, and I know my Nora is such a capricious thing – she couldn’t help but listen to her own
whimsical thoughts.
But I do know how inherently dull the girl is. She has it in her blood; she has directly invented the
capacity to make stupid decisions, from her father. What if she does not have the common sense
to return to her own husband? I will be ruined I, I will be quite the laughing stock, at work. They won’t
say anything to me, of course, but I am totally aware of how people talk. Yes, I know it very well. The
murmurs sounding through the halls as I walk past…the thought itself makes me shudder. I will
have no dignity – no honour! The only thing I treasure most in the world, snatched away from my
grasp! And all because of a useless woman. My reputation will be in shambles. Oh what a terrible
muck that girl has left me in.
How utterly selfish of her – her absence will make things so difficult for me. Who will take care of the
children now? Who will give them all that attention they so desperately crave? Oh, and what timing.
Right when I am swamped with work since I’ve just begun managing the bank, she leaves me to care
for the little critters. Now I must pay the maid overtime, since I don’t have any time or patience to
cater to the children’s every whim and fancy. How typical of Nora; she is making me spend money
even when she isn’t here. Well, I must have a positive outlook on this; the woman is after all. A liar
and a criminal. I do believe the children should not be exposed to her any longer, in any case, else
they could be poisoned by her deceitful nature.
The woman really has stripped me of everything – my money, my humour, my entertainment. Now
who will satisfy my sexual desires? My little plaything has been taken away from me. Life will be so
terribly boring henceforth. The girl was occasionally useful, I must admit – in terms of entertaining
me. She kindled a fire that burned fiercely through my body – on those days when she looked rather
appealing. How self-centred of her to take that away from me! The one enjoyment I receive after
a long, hard day of work that provides for her extravagance. It is after all, the wife’s role to amuse

and serve her husband faithfully. But Nora, oh Nora, has failed at this, too. And now I have nothing
to savour.
I wonder if she has any ethical sense, any morals whatsoever? I am aware of the fact that she
is a woman, and it will be hard for her to understand complex ideas, but even so, has she learned
nothing of religion? Is she completely oblivious to the sacred duties of a wife and a mother? Her
actions are sacrilegious. Her violations of her duty and our beliefs are thoroughly despicable. Nora’s
responsibilities as a woman are to serve her husband and guide her children – that is all – but she is
now doing neither. She evidently holds a stark contrast to me in terms of character and integrity.
I cannot understand – what ignited the thought of leaving me, in Nora’s miniscule brain? It is a little
curious that she has been spending a lot of time alone with Rank lately, and he seems rather elated
around her. Could they possibly be…? NO! No, my mind is wandering about at the moment. Rank is
my closest friend, he would never betray me. So who could have planted the venomous thoughts in
Nora’s mind? Ah, of course…that crooked woman Linde. Her husband has departed from her, and
so she wants Nora to be in a similar precarious situation! It must have been she who kindled the
inception. How impertinent! First she requests my help, and then has the audacity to stab me in
the back? I shouldn’t have allowed Nora to see her – this is the effect of being a single woman in the
world. Well, I will display that I am superior to her and her schemes. By tomorrow, she will no longer
have a position in my office! Let her suffer for the suffering she caused me, by humiliating me. It’s an
eye for an eye.
I do wonder, now – perhaps I was too harsh on Krogstad. He turned out to commit one good deed,
at least, by exposing Nora to me, as the fraudulent woman she truly is! Additionally, he prevented
the deformation of my dignity, by keeping mum about the Nora’s heinous act. It truly is a pity that
Krogstad is a man poisoned by his part crimes.
Nora is adopting the behaviour of a petulant child, by leaving me in the horrendous predicament.
I shall never forgive her – she expects me to change? How presumptuous. I believe the ‘greatest
miracle of all’, Nora’s habitually melodramatic phrase, would be if she became a veritably honest and
unselfish wife.
Word count, 962
Bibliography:
Ibsen, Henrik and Peter Watts. The League of Youth; A Doll’s House. The Lady From the Sea. London:
Penguin, 196 5. Print

Summative comment
This response shows a detailed appreciation of Torvald’s character at the moment specified in the task.
There is much detail that is rooted in the text capturing Torvald’s attitudes, not least in the language used
to describe his wife Nora: ‘The little child is so frivolous and impulsive’; ‘the feather-brained girl’; ‘My little
plaything’. There is a belated awareness of the nature of Rank’s attentions towards her.
The response demonstrates a perceptive and generally sensitive understanding of contextual issues and
conveys with some insight Torvald’s patriarchal attitudes. Although the voice is very largely authentic and
recognisable for the character and moment, there are occasional jarring notes which keep the response
from the upper end of Band 1: e.g. ‘The thought itself makes me shudder. I will have no dignity, no
honour’ and ‘Now who will satisfy my sexual desires?’
This response meets all of Band 2 descriptors. It has been awarded 23 marks, making it Band 1.
Script 13
Arthur Miller, The Crucible. Parris – after Betty has woken up
Oh praise the Lord! Thanks be to God! My dear Betty has awoken. Now she can clear my name of the
dirt the villagers intend to throw upon it. How frightened I was for her. She has awoken and now all
can be set right. The whole of Salem will be in uproar now. Finally after all of this chaos, Salem will
finally have the truth. All of the accused must be punished. I warned them, I warned the entire town
and yet they listened not. I was certain that evil spirits were upon us. Now we shall see who really
gives their soul to the Lord and who stands against me in this town.
That evil may reside in my own household, what an outrage that would L-/have been! Possessed girls
under my roof? I would surely lose my position in the town. Three hard year’s work I have put into
bending these stiff-necked narrow-minded people to me. At last, after three long years have they
finally began to show respect and trust towards me and my ministry. Trust from the parish has
just started to rise and then this scandal breaks lose! This is exactly what they would have needed
to turn against me. These people have come to look up to me, and now what would they see in me?
A reverend that has not the power to protect his own household from devilish spirits will most
definitely be evicted from the community.
I knew that Salem was on edge. Many of they were willing to turn against me.
They are full of jealousy for my possessions, yet it should be expected as they are only fit for
someone of my standards. Salem has been waiting for an opportunity to blacken my name and
grant my position to someone else and now that this terrible thing has happened they shall finally
have the conviction they need to dispose of me for good. I would have lost everything I have worked
for all this time! My house, my land, my ministry; I would have not a penny left to live on.
Now the time has come to end this outrage, this scandal; this disaster. The girls should know who
was involved and can find a way out of this
They have seen others with the devil. They have seen those that wish to corrupt me. The accused
will be questioned and put on trial.

The girls know best, for they can tell who wishes harm upon this village. Betty would never tell a lie,
for of course she is my daughter, the daughter of the most powerful and trusted man in Salem. She
is no doer of witchcraft. Neither is Abigail, my niece, for whom I have done so much. I welcomed her
into my home with open arms and have provided for her all this time. She is in great debt to me and
an act such as this could ruin me.
To think that the girls were possessed, taken from sanity by the devil himself! Abigail and Betty
would never willingly abide to do the work of the devil. I know what I have seen. I have seen them
dancing around a fire, singing, chanting. Dancing, charms, blood; these girls know better. Certainly
they realize what dangers they have thrown upon my shoulders. I am most certain that someone
sent their evil spirit out to them. If someone else has possessed them, they will not be accused.
I will not be accused. There is hope yet! They must confess to the marshal and say who has done
this. It is the only way I may be able to maintain my reputation.
Tituba too was with them and confessed. She also knows-what is at stake if my name were to be
blackened in the village. Aye, Tituba would never willingly commit to evil, for she knows the distress
it throws upon me, and the weight of her actions against my good name. Oh, God, bless Tituba!
The endless list of names continues; Sarah Good, Goody Osburn, Bridget Bishop. How many have
trafficked With the devil? How many more are to be accused? Abigail and Betty are free. They were
merely victims of the devil’s work. They would never have committed evil or crime, for they know
what would happen to me if they were not to abide to the law. Everything I have is at stake. Oh,
thank God that they have come clean!
Send for the Marshal. Aye, the marshal will know what to do. He will find those who are guilty
and they shall be sentenced. The devil shall hide in Salem no longer. And my house will be free of
accusations. Those responsible for these evil endeavors must be punished! They have brought
nothing but trouble upon my name and my household and I shall not have it. Salem is a Christian
town and evil will be traced back to me. How many Sundays have I preached to the people about hell
and damnation, and yet they remain too weak to resist temptation. The devil is at work in Salem
and we shall stop him!
Word count, 878
Summative comment
The response captures throughout the superiority of the man and the concern he has for his own
reputation and for retaining his position as minister of Salem: ‘That evil may reside in my own household,
what an outrage that would have been! Possessed girls under my roof? I would surely lose my position in
the town’.
There is for the most part an engagingly convincing voice for the character: ‘A reverend that has not
the power to protect his own household from devilish spirits will most definitely be evicted from the
community’. There are occasional jarring notes such as ‘I knew that Salem was on edge’ and ‘Oh, thank
God that they have come clean’ - but they do not detract from the detailed appreciation of character that
is rooted in the text.
This is a secures 22 marks, making it a Band 2 response.

Script 14
George Orwell, Nineteen Eight-Four. O’Brien – immediately after Winston and Julia have left your
house
Naturally as I anticipated those inferior, feeble minds flew like bees right to my honey pot. Like
insects led by a flame they have be in the fake ideals and promises I fed them. Those crimethinkers
fell right into my trap. All it took was a little indulgence in Goldstein and the fraudulent
Brotherhood. Their facecrime was apparent. It was obvious that their thoughts weren’t Party
approved. They are hopeless souls that will believe in anything to try and defy the Party, but why I
will never understand...Overthrowing the loving and generous Party is impossible, and they are blind
not to recognise that.
Soon I will be able to rid those wretched minds of those unforgivable thoughts against the
benevolent Party. How dare they disavow the love and devotion that Big Brother and the Party
gives its followers, we are privileged to be governed by such esteemed ideals and such a prestigious
leader. But soon they will know the wrath and hostility that we show to anyone who repudiates the
Party. Soon I will put and end to their deluded thoughts and they will see that Big Brother and the
Party can never be overthrown, especially by meager annoyances like them. Crimestop will put an
end to this madness!
Those crimethinkers will soon be in my grasp and I can change their immoral thoughts and make
them true, permanent loving members of the Party. Why would anyone try to question the perfect
rules and ethics set by the Party, which are there to make its members benefit fully and live a
wholesome life? With my help and a visit to the Ministry of Love they will fear the thought of
doubting or double crossing the Party. But I must wait till I am able to kill the hope inside them and
drain the undesired, troublesome thoughts that roam inside their Party opposed minds. Soon they
will see that black is white and that 2 + 2 = 5. They will apprehend and accept that the Party knows
best and not some other insignificant organisation, specifically the treacherous Brotherhood. They
will experience their worst nightmares in the Ministry of Love and they will turn against each other
just like they turned against the Party. However long it might take I will not stop till they see and
understand the Party’s true love.
Although, Winston, like a fool, confessed to his thoughtcrimes I don’t have any solid proof, as I had
to put my telescreen off to convince them that we were on the same side, which was a lie, of course.
I have to wait till they actually take action and rebel against the Party; this can only happen once
they have read the apocryphal Goldstein book. Only then I will have concrete evidence to justify
and seal their future fate with me in the ministry of love. Already they have started to defy the
Party by indulging in sexcrime. If only I could capture them now and not let them roam the streets
indulging in thoughtcrime, thinking of the fictional and impossible downfall of Big Brother and the
Party. They may be even spreading their views, but they are too powerless to make a difference.
They are careless and short-sighted fools who don’t identify the fact that it is hopelessly
impossible to try and evade the radar of the Party. We know everything about everyone even if they
try and believe that by the slightest chance they can bypass the system. Fools, fools that I will
successfully apprehend.
How I wish I could see the smile on Big Brother’s face once he hears about my successful capture
of two crimethinkers. He will see how, I a goodthinking member of the Party who has been faithful

to him; now I have two crimethinking culprits, which I will also change into goodthinkers, to give
as a gift to him. A gift that will show him my gratitude, for enlightening me, with his true love, all
those years ago. It is an honour to help Big Brother in the eradication of all crimethinkers from our
utopian society and be part of the prestigious Thought Police who find these despicable un-loyal
members. How lucky I am to have such a prominent role in the Party and maybe if Big Brother sees
my undisputed allegiance to him, he might promote to one of his trusted advisors. But for now all
I have to do is wait. Wait for those pathetic creatures to betray and disrespect the Party and all
that we have given them. After the party has rectified them, we will see what their thoughts are...
Word count, 768
Summative comment
The response shows a perceptive and convincing personal response to the text and task. There is
evidence of a detailed appreciation of the voice that is appropriate for both the character and specified
moment. The voice is rooted in the detail of the text and its themes, with pertinent references to
crimethink, the Brotherhood, telescreens and sexcrime, and also to future events in the novel.
The response captures convincingly the duplicitous nature of the character having just set up Winston
and Julia for their eventual arrest: ‘Those crimethinkers fell right into my trap’. The voice is generally
convincing: e.g. ‘How dare they disavow the love and devotion that Big Brother and the Party gives its
followers?’
This is a Band 2 response, achieving 21 marks.
Bibliography:
George Orwell, “1984”: Signet Classics
http://www.newspeakdictionary.com/ns-dict.html
http://www.sparknotes.com/lit/1984/canalysis.html
Script 15
William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet. Tybalt – after Lord Capulet has ordered you to behave
yourself at the ball
I, a princox? That villain Romeo, how dareth he set foot here? ‘Tis a shame that he shall be slain by
mine own courageous hands.
Thou imbecile has disgraced me in front of my honourable uncle, Lord Capulet. That boy, that lowly
villain, has brought discredit to the highest family of all Verona -the mighty Capulets. With Lord
Capulet accepting that outrageous degradation it has brought much humiliation to my pride. My
pride has been sinned upon by the villain of Verona, which Lord Capulet praises as a well-govern’d
youth. Oh, why does not a soul see my pain? Not Lord Capulet or the strerets of Verona. Therefore I
shall take into my hands the burden of this plague upon my family. I shall hold it against Romeo, my
mortal enemy from the most ancient of times when they had not books to record their deeds, for
the denial of respect to the Capulets at this affair.

This Ancient Grugde between our houses has born in me a slithery snake, and hateful venom has
filled my mind to hate all things Montague. My will is constricted and I will slay with no mercy all
that wilt consort’st with the Montague dogs. As my lord commands -withdraw I shall this time -
though patience I have not - but that reeking dog, that scoundrel Romeo, will be squeezed ‘till every
ounce of his black blood is gone, and I shall feed it to his parents, in goblets of hellish fire that he will
invite gladly, screaming whilst burning their throats, and blistering their corrupt hands that has
once slain grand Capulets.
If thou wants to seek thine death for the sins I have done to thy brethren then thou shall not be
able to toucheth me ‘cause Iwill be too quick for thy sluggish hate which has overwhelmed thee. I am
the Prince of Cats the quickest in all Verona. If thou, Romeo, manages to catch me, as a result thou
wilt slayeth me hence I shall also befall that sin upon thee and bring thee to the deepest depths of
Tartarus.
Later, I shall go and meet thou at where thee resides and slaughter all residences of thy lineage,
or better just meet thou in the market place, when thee is out for a walk, when wandering where
fair Rosaline art I should have, then and there, happily slaughtered thee whence thou were leaving
the festive house, or intoxicated thy beverage, at the joyous affair? Oh, but Romeo you had been
blessed that I did not kill you at the feast, cause if did so thou respected Prince shalt save your
wretched brethren execute the one Great Capulet. The Prince has intimidated brave Lord Capulet
so no civil brawl shall rupture the hateful peace. ‘tis the only reason thou art alive and well, Romeo,
you goodman boy! Oh, how I hate that I have to endure thee!
What art thou doing at the affair, consorting with my beloved cousin Juliet? She it too fair for thee,
too high. She is to be married to the galant Paris, a worthy gentleman! My uncle speakest happily
about that sacred bond that shall bring honour upon the Capulet house. What art thou doing with
her? For consorting with her you shall pay a double price, not only on this earth, but in hell where
thou doth belong, with your filthy kin where they have slewed all the mighty Capulets over the
century.
That goodman boy Romeo I hate for words unsaid, ‘tis a mystery which has befallen us by our
ancestors, who arose this feud. Wherefore these honoured ancestors of ours has brought much
hate between us all, and fuelled me to slaughter more of the dogs? Our brethren have been brawling
so long, many great men have fallen from the house of Capulet for no cause, all to vain. This brawl is
part of life as the stars are of the night sky! I shall not disgrace those before me, by showing mercy
to one simple villain, of which enemies my kin has made. Let him pay double price for consorting with
the beloved Juliet! Let him squeal for mercy, the weak slave he is! Curse thee, Romeo!
Word count, 726

Summative comment
The response shows a clear understanding of Tybalt’s character and makes a spirited attempt at an
authentic voice, rooted in the detail of the text: e.g. his pride in the nickname ‘Prince of cats’, his sarcastic
address to Romeo ‘you goodman boy’. The voice articulates something of the play’s wider context: ‘This
brawl is part of life as the stars are of the night sky. I shall not disgrace those before me, by showing
mercy to one simple villain...’
The voice is generally authentic and appropriate for the specified moment, though at this precise point,
Romeo is not yet ‘consorting’ with Juliet.
On balance, this response is sufficiently well-developed and detailed, with a largely authentic voice for
Tybalt.
Band 3, 18 marks.
Script 16
Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451, Montag – [moment not specified]
Dear Mildred,
I think that is time we talk about this, it was time a long time ago. Remember the time we were
closer, we used to spend more time together, we used to call each other not just “Guy” or
“Mildred”, we used to call each other names like “Millie these days we never talk, there is no love like
before, and we do not do anything together anymore. It is as if the love has dissolved into the air.
Since the moment you told to the police that I have books, I stopped trusting you, you just go with
the society, you just go with whatever the law says, forgetting that I am your husband. Why did you
do that to me? You are not the Mildred I remember. You have changed.
I find this sad that we do not remember where we first met; we do not spend any time together.
Millie, it is not just you, it is this whole society that is driving me crazy, I mean, who will have
divorced 3 times and have over 10 abortions it their life time and have kids that you hate. I hate
the fact that you people consider that normal, open your eyes and look around you. This is not
normal.
And what about the books, why is the society making a big deal of them, when your imagination
runs wild. When I started reading books, I found out the truth about this society. This society is
manipulated like zombies by the government; you just go with the law and don’t think outside of the
box. We are all controlled like dolls. You never wonder why things like books are illegal.
When you are sitting in the parlor with your friends, I cannot stand it; I feel like the parlor took you
away from me, I need you to come back. If I could take a hammer and smash those walls down, I
would. This world is making you crazy. It is making me crazy.
I think you should stop living in your own little world and think outside this box and live life to the
fullest instead of listening to your seashells and stop staying in the parlor and go outside go have
some fun, the “fun” that this society considers is not fun. The idea “anti-social” in this society is

the complete opposite. People that you consider anti-social are social and this society is the ones
that are anti social and the ones that have no life. Those people are the ones that have a life. The
societies’ perception was inverted inside out.
I wonder if you even remember that you tried committing suicide the other day when you overdosed
on your sleeping pills, I have a strong feeling that you do remember everything, and are just lying
to me. I can clearly see why you would attempt to kill your self. Living a messed up life like that can
make anyone go crazy and want to hang them selves. From what I have said, I hope you take that it
and not just ignore it because that is the way society would. I want you to open your eyes.
Lastly I would like to ask you about Beaty, the moment he stepped inside you all of a sudden
started acting all different. It might be just me but I suspect that you might have a “thing” going
on with him. I really think that we need to talk about this, and everything in general. Meet me in the
parlor.
From Guy Montag
Word count, 608
Summative comment
The task does not specify a particular moment, though the reference to Mildred’s attempted suicide in
the penultimate paragraph offers some clue about the intended moment, later in the text. The format of
the letter is not required for empathic responses.
The response demonstrates an understanding of Montag’s character and his concerns as developed
in the novel: the couple’s loss of intimacy; Mildred’s obsession with the parlor-walls and her so-called
‘friends’; Montag’s discovery of the importance of books. There is, therefore, a general understanding of
the novel’s deeper implications.
The response contains features of expression that are suitable for the character: ‘You are not the Mildred
I remember. You have changed.’ Occasionally, however, points are not developed with sufficient clarity:
‘People that you consider anti-social are social and this society is the ones that are anti-social and the
ones that have no life.’ The attempt to comment on thematic concerns here detracts from the voice.
Overall, this is a Band 4 response, achieving 15 marks.
Script 17
Lorraine Hansberry, A Raisin in the Sun. Walter – at the end of Act 2 Scene 3
What have I gone done now?! Me and Mama have had our ups and downs in the past, but now, now I
have hit my all time low. Why Willy?! Come back! I have shamed my whole family, making a complete
fool of myself. I boasted of how this here deal, this great investment, would save our family from
being thrown out on the streets. How it would get us a nice big house that them rich white folks
own. How it would save me from saying day after day, yes sir, no sir, of course sir!
Oh how I was so full of dreams, hope and how I gone done it. I lost all of the money my father worked
his whole tireing life for. Now I’m on my knees, swallowing my hate for Willy, trying to explain to
Mama how I lost, how I carelessly threw away, my own fathers life. Why Willy?! I trusted you! I

cannot believe you, you pathetic man, just took the money without no consideration, no respect of
the daily labouring my father went through!!
My father sacrificed his blood, sweat and tears for this here family; he sacrificed his life. Night
after night he came in exhausted and thin to the bone. He was a great man. A great leader. Why did
you leave us?! This would have never happened is you were here! Never.
Oh, and poor Benetha! I ended her chances of ever becoming a doctor. Actually not just a doctor, a
black, female, doctor. Now that would be something, wouldn’t it? Oh how she must hate me, how she
must hate my stupid careless guts. I don’t know how I would ever gain her trust again. She is one
independent woman, one strong woman, mama raised her good.
Oh, and how Mama must feel! I’m sorry Mama, I didn’t mean for this to happen! Mama!! I, I have no
words, nothing to make you feel better! Stupid, stupid me! Why Walter?! Why?! Mama was the only
one who believed in me. She gave me the power, to change things around here. Me, t put Benetha’s
money safe for her future. Me, to get Travis out of that couch and into his own room. Me, to
support this family. And I failed, once again. I’m sorry Mama, I’m so sorry!
Willy’s timing couldn’t be more perfect! Mama just bought a new house and Lord almighty, Ruth is
with child! That baby, small lifeless baby, will grow up in this environment? This state of living ain’t
for no baby! I won’t let this baby grow up with no money, no room, no respect and me. I can’t imagine
being my baby boy, being exposed to such disgrace and all that fighting we gone and done in the
past years.
I wanted, still want, my son to look up at me and be proud, to be proud of me pushing through all the
discrimination all the hate, and for giving him the life he deserves. I want him to have his own room
and not a couch as a bed. It was my envy, my greed that put this family in jeopardy. I am so sick of
serving them rich white folks, with their fancy cars, big houses and their good for nothing children!!
The abuse their power, treat us like dirt. And while they are having a good old blast, us black folks
slave and slave and slave, to get what?! More debt?! More bruses from not only scrubbing their
shiny marble floors, but from the looks, the words, the discrimination. When will it end!?
Oh Lord, help me, give me the power to go on, give Mama strength to forgive me, give all us African
Americans the same freedom them white folks get. Give me the power to change this. Lord give me
strength!!!
Word count, 664

Summative comment
The response shows an understanding of the character’s situation and likely thoughts, with an awareness
of the text’s deeper implications: the consequences of the unsuccessful business venture and the wider
social context ‘I am so sick of serving them rich white folks, with their fancy cars, big houses...’
The re-telling of the plot is sometimes at the expense of constructing an authentic voice for the specified
moment. There is evidence of suitable expression in places, but this is not sustained throughout the
response. The final paragraph, for example, adopts an overly melodramatic tone: ‘Oh Lord, help me, give
me the power to go on...Lord, give me strength.’
On balance, this is placed towards the bottom of Band 4, achieving 14 marks.
Script 18
Arthur Miller, The Crucible. Danforth – at the end of the play
I watched John Proctor’s limp body hanging on the rope, over the town. The village folk have
witnessed his and Rebecca’s deaths. So many...there were so many more than I thought would
come! Women, men and children were standing and praying for the soul of those who had no doubt
gone to hell. That vile witch Proctor will burn for eternity! The devil’s roots were too deep inside of
him. I almost succeeded, almost opened God’s light to him, but he would not see it. He was too full
of and full of conviction to the devil to see it. And I know there was a devil in that Rebecca woman,
even if the townsfolk are too blind to see it. I alone am chosen by God to see it. I turned around to
witness the rising of the sun, and feel God’s eternal glory, and blessing; every morning as I great
the new day, he gives me strength to battle against evil.
The weeping sounds distracted me from my contact with Him, and I turn around to see the
blackening bodies on the rope. The evil that was inside of them is pouring out in the form of a
sickening stench. The people are whispering amongst themselves, and the children don’t stop
their weeping. Bewilderment flooded me, and then fear. Should these people not be grateful to me
for protecting them from the Devil’s disciples, and preserving God’s light in their lives? I suddenly
become aware of all the looks of anger, fear, and hatred that folks throw me, when my back is
turned, and those girls who were once loyal to the cause of God are now praying for the dead nurse.
The whole village is against me! These common, senseless people who cannot recognize good from
evil... They should be on their knees in front of me for saving their petty souls from the devil’s
corruption. Common people can never foresee evil’s lurking plans. They should turn to wiser, more
knowledgable people such as me, but they no longer do.
I am so very tired of battling the evil alone, but surely, now after so many of his disciples have been
uncovered, my job must be finished. I do not feel that I have the strength to continue this battle.
The sight of Proctor’s crying wife and the bunch of grieving relatives under the bodies enrages me,
I cannot say why. Then I see a boy, his face sad and swollen; he must be of age soon. He glares at me
with such a hatred that can only match the Devil’s laugh. His glare, as if bewitching me, makes cold
sweat drip from my forehead, and I feel a horrible fear coming up to my throat. Quickly, I turn away
from the boy, and the fear is gone. “Mr. Hale,” I say, “who be that boy, the tallest one of the three?”
Mr. Hale does not look at me when he replies: “That be Proctor’s oldest son, your honor.” So the
darkness is in son as it is in father. My confidence seems to fade to that answer. No matter what I

do, there are always more of his disciples among us. But no matter what, I shall have order, and this
will be made a god-fearing village.
Word count, 554
Summative comment
The response captures something of Danforth’s certainty in his own judgements: ‘That vile witch will
burn for eternity! The devil’s roots were too deep inside of him. I almost succeeded, almost opened
God’s light to him, but he would not see it.’ However, the voice contains less convincing notes: ‘His glare,
as if bewitching me, makes cold sweat drip from my forehead, and I feel a horrible fear coming up to my
throat’.
The focus on the weeping sounds, Proctor’s crying wife and the glare of Proctor’s son suggest a creative
response to the moment chosen – but the response is not fully rooted in the specific detail of the action
of the play. There is a movement away from the text itself.
Overall, the response ‘begins to assume a voice’ appropriate to the character, and there is evidence of
some understanding of details from the text in a Band 5 response. This achieved 13 marks.
Script 19
Arthur Miller, The Crucible. Elizabeth Proctor – You hear John below. He is late. [beginning of Act 2]
Where could John have been? At this time he was still outside. What could he have been? I think he
was with that horrible Abigail again, that name disgusts me. I cannot believe that he was in love
with her. I should have poisoned
Abigail when she was inside. It would have stopped all of these problems with John and Abigail. John
would still be in love with me and not that hoer. She has ruined John’s love for me. She has ruined our
marriage. What if John and I go separate? What will happen to our children? I will miss them with all
of my heart. Those children are keeping John and I together. If it were not for the children, we would
not be together anymore.
What could John have been doing with that girl, Abigail? They could have been doing strange things.
The last time he was with that Abigail, he came home and went to sleep. I do not think that Proctor
loves me anymore. He has most likely fallen in love with Abigail. Who introduced Abigail to proctor? I
do not even want to know. Abigail has ruined our love for each other. But I am thinking too much. He
could have also been working. But what if that Abigail came by when John was working. This pain of
Abigail and John is destroying me.
The affair could have never happened. I was always nice and sweet to Proctor. I have always should
that I love proctor with all my heart, and then he goes outside with other woman. This makes me
so angry. I cannot believe that Abigail has tried to frame me for witchcraft. She did that so she
could run of with John. I cannot let that happen as long as I am here. As long as I am in Salem, John
Proctor and Abigail Williams s will not run of together. I will not let John Proctor run of with that
hoer. Abigail does not deserve that hoer. John proctor deserves nobody but me. I love John with all
my heart and I hope that somewhere deep in Johns’, he loves me as much as I love him.

I still cannot, and will not believe that John, my John Proctor has committed adultery with Abigail
Williams. I want to bring it to the high court. But I cannot because then I will also lose my John
Proctor. I want John Proctor to be with me forever. Adultery and lecher John, my John. What has
gotten in to you? Could it have been me? Was I maybe too frigid? Was it my fault that you went with
Abigail? You were tempted by the young Abigail. I was sick, and I could have not done anything to
stop you. I did not even notice that anything happened. I had to put all of the pieces of the puzzle
together. When I put all the pieces of the puzzle together, that is when I knew what happened.
John, I am truly disappointed in you. I cannot go to sleep at night with the thought of being with
another woman. You are the one that I love john. I love you john and I will never let you go. I will never
make the mistakes that other woman make of letting their loved ones go. You will always stay with
me John, and if it is not in reality, you wil stay with me for always in my hart.
Word count, 603
Summative comment
The response shows a basic understanding of character and text, with an awareness of her husband’s
affair with Abigail. The moment is not clearly grasped: for example, Abigail has not yet ‘framed’ Elizabeth
for witchcraft.
The voice is not really a convincing one for the character: ‘I want John Proctor to be with me forever.
Adulterer and lecher John, my John. What has gotten in to you? Could it have been me? Was I too frigid?’
The factual errors and the uncertainty in the voice mean that the response can be placed no higher than
Band 6, with 9 marks.

Section 4: Oral response
4.1 Guidance
The Oral response: recorded conversation, offers an innovative way for a Cambridge IGCSE Literature
course to test learners’ appreciation of literature. At the outset, it should be emphasised that this is not a
test of spoken language skills. A glance at the assessment criteria for the oral response reveals that the
following are being tested:
• quality of personal response and level of understanding

• use of textual detail to support views.
As with written coursework, it is important for learners to select tasks which have a clear and manageable
focus. With this in mind, learners have to choose a particular character from a prose or drama text or a
particular theme from a prose, drama or poetry text. Here is a reminder of what the Syllabus states:
The conversation will be based on either the way a chosen writer presents a particular character or the way
a chosen writer presents a particular theme.
The focus should, therefore, be on the writer’s presentation of character or theme. Earlier questions in the
recorded conversation may well address character traits or explanations of themes. Subsequent questions
should deal with the writer’s methods.
4.2 Choice of texts

The text can be one used for:
• Paper 3 (Set Text)

• one of the written coursework texts
• a totally different text.
If poems or short stories are being used, the oral response should deal with a minimum of two poems/short
stories. Dealing with too many poems/stories should be avoided, as this may lead to a fragmented approach.
4.3 Preparing for the oral response

Before deciding on their chosen aspect, learners should be given opportunities to research their chosen
text. Research involving a range of secondary texts (e.g. print, online, video) is likely to give learners the
confidence to make appropriate choices. Notes made will inform their understanding and appreciation,
though it should be remembered that they may not refer to notes in the actual recorded conversation.
Learners’ performance in the oral assessment is likely to be strengthened by taking part in a range of
classroom activities designed to probe the detail of texts. For example, small group discussion could centre
on reasons for sympathising, admiring or disliking characters. Drama-focused work could explore how
writers present characters and themes.
Learners should be given concise details of the way the Oral response will be conducted as well as the
requirements of the assessment.


The titles below include the name of the writer as well as the chosen character or theme. This is to remind
learners of the need to explore the writer’s techniques in presenting character or theme.
Kafka’s presentation of Gregor in Metamorphosis
How Ibsen portrays Nora in A Doll’s House
Mishima’s portrayal of Hatsue in The Sound of the Waves
How Dangarembga presents Tambu in Nervous Conditions
The ways Heaney presents childhood innocence in two poems from Death of a Naturalist
The ways Hansberry presents racism in A Raisin in the Sun
How Ibsen depicts corruption in An Enemy of the People
The ways writers convey ideas about the future in two short science fiction stories
The wording in the examples is deliberately varied: e.g. how a writer presents/portrays/depicts/conveys.
Centres are encouraged to adopt wording that is most useful for their own learners.

4.4 Oral response – assessment criteria

Band 1 15 Demonstrates all the Band 2 qualities, together with insight, sensitivity,
14 individuality and flair
• shows complete engagement with both text and task

Band 2 13 Sustains a perceptive, convincing and relevant response
12
• shows a detailed critical appreciation of how the writer presents character or
theme/ideas
• integrates specific, well-selected references for support
10
9 • shows a clear and sustained understanding of how the writer presents
character or theme/ideas
• makes specific and relevant references for support
7
6 • shows understanding of how the writer presents character or theme/ideas
• makes some appropriate use of textual evidence for support
Band 5 5 Begins to develop a personal response to the task
4
3 • shows some understanding of character or theme/ideas
• uses some textual detail for support
Band 6 2 Attempts to communicate a basic personal response
1
• shows a basic understanding of character or theme/ideas
• makes a little reference to the text
Below Band 6 0 Does not meet the criteria for Band 6
• responses are very hesitant and/or digressive, showing a very limited

understanding of task/text
4.5 Conduct of the Oral response: for teachers

Before the recording
1. Check that recording equipment is working properly.
2. Make a note of potential questions (this will most likely be done well in advance of the recording), but do
not give them to the learner in advance.
3. Welcome the learner and explain briefly and in general terms the way the conversation will be
conducted.
4. Put the learner at ease by asking a question or two about themselves. (Remember this is not assessed.)

During the recording

1. Begin by stating clearly the centre number, candidate number, candidate name and the chosen aspect.
2. Ask questions from the start of the conversation. Do not allow candidates to begin with a rehearsed
commentary.
3. Ask open questions as far as possible, as these enable the candidate to answer at reasonable length.
4. Ask follow-up questions which build on the points the candidate makes. Less confident speakers
are likely to need more prompt questions to help them to develop their points. Intervene when less
confident speakers are in need of positive encouragement.
5. Appear interested and supportive, doing nothing to distract. Do not make notes during the recording.
6. Do not correct mistakes, give the impression there is a ‘right’ answer, interrupt with your own views, or
show surprise or impatience.
7. Do not extend the conversation beyond 4 minutes if there is no benefit for the candidate.
8. After 6 minutes 30 seconds, begin to draw the conversation to a close.
9. Stop the recording after seven minutes have elapsed, saying ‘That concludes the conversation.’
10. Do not give your opinion of the candidate’s performance e.g. ‘That was very good’ or ‘You made some
excellent points’.
After the recording

Files should be organised in such a way that moderators can retrieve them easily. They should be labelled:
0408_01_Centre number_Candidate number_Candidate surname
e.g. 0408_01_AB123_1234_Chan
4.6 Types of question in the oral assessment: recorded

conversation
This list of possible questions is by no means exhaustive. The main aim is to ask open questions that allow
candidates to demonstrate a personal engagement with the detail of their chosen aspect. It is important,
too, to ask follow-up questions in the spirit of a conversation. This will enable learners to demonstrate that
they can ‘think on their feet’. The ways in which learners respond to open questions and follow-up questions
will be discriminators in the oral assignment. Less confident learners are likely to need more closed
questions to give them confidence, particularly in the first minutes of the assessment.
Some questions should focus explicitly on the role of the writer if the learner is to meet the various
assessment criteria. A conversation that neglects the role of the writer and, for example, treats a character
like a real-life person cannot score highly.

Examples of teacher questions

Discussion with other teachers in your school and from other schools will help you to build a repertoire of
useful questions. The following list provides a starting-point.
1. What were your initial impressions of your chosen character?

2. To what extent do you think it’s possible to admire or sympathise with your chosen character?
3. Do you think your chosen character is a hero or a villain? (Such a question used with characters
eliciting opposing judgements, for example, saint v. sinner, or hero v. villain, can provoke lively personal
responses.)
4. What, in your opinion, does the character contribute to the overall text?
5. Why do you think the writer made this such an important theme?
6. What do you find striking, dramatic, moving, amusing about your chosen aspect?
7. How effective do you find the opening or the ending in relation to your chosen theme?
8. What significance, in your view, does a particular chapter, scene or stanza have to the presentation of
the chosen theme?
9. What do you find powerful (or memorable/striking/vivid/ironic etc.) about the way the writer uses
language to present the chosen character or theme – with specific examples?
10. Why did you choose this topic?
11. How do you think the title relates to the theme?
Useful follow-up questions

It is important for teachers to respond to what learners actually say in order to develop and sustain the
conversation. Examples of follow-up questions include:
• Why do you say that?

• Is there any evidence to support that particular view?
• What did you feel at that point in the play/story?
• What effect does that have on you as a reader (or member of an audience)?
• Is there another significant moment you could talk about?

4.7 Examples of assignment 3 Oral Responses

Accompanying this handbook are seven recordings of sample oral responses.
The moderator’s comments for these are detailed below.
Comment on Track 1
Yukio Mishima, The Sound of Waves
The topic is Shinji’s coming of age. Throughout the conversation there is a clear sense of the novelist at
work. There is clear reference to key specific moments: for example, the ending of the novel which sees
Shinji reflecting on his own development as a person. The candidate refers to the crucial scene in the
novel which shows the character at one with the natural environment of Uta-Jima. Attention is paid to the
detail of Shinji’s use of language: Mishima’s use of ‘the boy’ to describe Shinji reveals the undeveloped
aspects of his character. Symbolism and imagery are explored confidently.
This is a Band 1 response shows a complete engagement with both text and the candidate’s chosen
topic. The attention to detail shows considerable insight, sensitivity and individuality. It achieved
15 marks.
Comment on Track 2
Athol Fugard, ‘Master Harold’...and the Boys
The candidate begins by setting out the focus of the conversation: the techniques used to create
sympathy for Hally. An extensive range of specific and well-selected references support her response.
The importance to the play of the reminiscing of the kite-flying is explored. A strong personal response
is offered to the young Hally’s pessimism, which the candidate finds ‘heart-breaking’. The wider context
of Apartheid is considered explicitly in its relation to the impact it has on Hally in the play. The contrast
between the child-like and ‘nasty’ aspects of Hally’s character is also discussed.
The response offers detailed critical appreciation, with insight and sensitivity. There is a sustained
engagement with the text and, for the most part, with the topic. This is a Band 1 response which would
achieve 14 marks.
Comment on Track 3
Dai Sijie, Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress
The chosen topic is the role of the character Four-Eyes. The primary focus is how a character can start
off as one individual and turn into a coward and corrupt individual. The response is well-developed and
shows a clear understanding of the character, with some specific and well-selected reference used for
support.
Attention is given to Shinji’s language: e.g. ‘enraged’ to show Four-Eyes’ fury when his glasses are
knocked off by the buffalo. The symbolism of the character’s name is explored in a character who ‘cannot
see beyond his own fear’. There is some focus on the novel’s impact on a reader though the focus tends
to be on character rather than presentation of character. Occasionally, there is a tendency to over-assert:
e.g. ‘through this implicit meaning of narcissism we can see he is a corrupt individual’.
On balance, this response is a Band 2 answer, achieving 12 marks.

Comment on Track 4
The conversation begins with a well-developed response to the question ‘What do settings show about
his character?’ There is reference to Shinji’s role as fisherman and his bravery in saving the boat. There is
a clear understanding of the importance of the latter incident in what it reveals about Shinji’s character.
The candidate sustains a clear response to a range of questions about Shinji in relation to class, the title
of the book and in comparison with Yasuo. The candidate indicates the contrast between Shinji’s natural
relationship with Hatsue and Yasuo’s ‘forcing’ himself.
Overall, this is a well-developed and detailed personal response, in the middle of Band 3, 10 marks. A
more detailed critical probing of Mishima’s writing would have lifted the response.
Comment on Track 5
The chosen topic is ‘courage’. This is a reasonably developed personal response which outlines aspects
of courage shown by the characters. Shinji, says the candidate, displays a lot of courage as he develops
from being shy into a more confident character. He is contrasted with the arrogantly over-confident
Yasuo. An example of Hatsue’s courage is revealed when she stood up for herself in her argument with
her father. The response makes some use of textual evidence for support: e.g. Shinji’s shyness as he sat
in the corner and didn’t speak much at the Young Men’s Association.
There could be a more explicit engagement with the ways in which Mishima presents courage in the
novel. This is a Band 4 response, achieving 8 marks.
Comment on Track 6
The candidate’s responses to a series of questions show understanding of Shinji’s character: he is a

fisherman, athletic and swims very fast. There is a grasp of the difference in class between Shinji and
Yasuo: the latter is ‘very rich and arrogant’; the former ‘not very rich’. There is some reference to textual
detail but it is not very developed. The conversation reveals a grasp of character but only an implicit
awareness of characterisation (i.e. the ways in which Mishima portrays Shinji).
Some of the teacher’s prompts are not taken up by the candidate who simply replies ‘Yes’ to the
questions ‘Does he show courage?’ and ‘Would you describe him as a religious person?’
Overall, there is ‘some understanding’ and ‘some textual detail for support’. This is a Band 5 response,
achieving 5 marks.

Comment on Track 7
Athol Fugard, ‘Master Harold’...and the Boys
The chosen focus is how and why Sam changes and develops during the play. The candidate shows
some understanding of character and surface meanings. For example, Sam takes offence and becomes
aggressive at Hally’s racist joke towards the end of the play. Also, Sam is sad at the memory of the kite
scene because he hadn’t been able to sit with Hally [on the whites-only bench]. The response lacks an
explicit engagement with the ways in which Fugard presents the character of Sam.
This conversation begins to develop a Band 5 response. Points sometimes require further development
and support. This achieved 5 marks.

Section 5: Coursework administration
5.1 Teacher supervision

Texts should be taught in such a manner that learners are encouraged to think for themselves rather than
merely reproduce what their teachers tell them. Teachers may suggest ways of approaching tasks and
planning assignments.
Written coursework
Sufficient work must be done under the supervision of the teacher so as to confirm the authenticity of a
learner’s work. The syllabus states that ‘if plans and first drafts are completed under teacher supervision,
then teachers can be reassured of the authenticity of the final assignment’ (Syllabus, section 4).
Teachers should give only general guidance about re-drafting. They might comment, for example, on the
need for a student to:
• develop points more fully and/or more clearly

• substantiate assertions
• integrate quotation more succinctly
• structure an argument more effectively
• adopt a suitably formal critical register
• edit or extend the piece of writing.
The learner must then be able to make a further draft without any help. Teachers should not mark,
correct or edit draft assignment material.
Additionally, a clear line needs to be drawn between the teacher offering opportunities in lessons for
exploring the text and the teacher giving a tightly structured framework which simply requires candidates to
regurgitate the same points, quotations and conclusions. Such an approach gives the mistaken impression
that there is such a thing as a correct answer, and this would not be in the spirit of the World Literature
syllabus.
Oral response
Details of the conduct of the oral assessment can be found in Section 4.5 of this handbook.
5.2 Length of assignments

Centres should not submit critical essays longer than 1200 words or empathic responses longer than 1000
words. Candidates should indicate the word count at the end of each assignment.
Oral assessments should not exceed 7 minutes. Teachers are advised not to extend the conversation
beyond the minimum of 4 minutes where there is no benefit for the candidate.

5.3 Technical accuracy in written coursework

You should note that learners may show a detailed appreciation of literature in spite of technical inaccuracies
in their writing. Conversely, a learner with a fluent and accurate control of English may not necessarily
demonstrate a good understanding of the literary aspects of a text. Because you are assessing literature,
there is no need to indicate errors of spelling, punctuation and grammar, though at the drafting stage
teachers are likely to want to remind learners of the need for accuracy and clarity of expression – in order to
practise those areas important for success in their language studies.
5.4 Plagiarism in written coursework

It is the school’s responsibility to make sure all coursework is the original work of learners. Teachers need
to make clear the consequences of plagiarism, both at the outset of the course and at intervals thereafter.
Teachers can generally detect writing which is not consistent in quality with a learner’s usual output. There
may, for example, be a lifted paragraph which sits oddly with the writing before and after it. Perhaps there is
some uncharacteristically ambitious phrasing; a simple enquiry about the meaning of the phrase will settle
doubts one way or the other.
The teacher’s role in detecting plagiarism is crucial. If you have doubts about the authenticity of an
assignment, it should not be included, even if this means an incomplete folder must be submitted.
5.5 Evidence of marking and annotation on candidate work

As well as providing comments on the overall quality of the Portfolio on the Individual Candidate Record
Card, teachers must mark each assignment, indicating strengths/weaknesses as appropriate, and providing
a final comment, making clear reference to the assessment criteria.
In the examination papers, examiners are instructed to tick points which are interesting, sensitive and
thoughtful. This is good practice, too, when marking written coursework assignments. The very occasional
tick with very little comment is not helpful to the moderation process. Indeed, such an approach betrays
a misunderstanding of the process. By contrast, the precise ticking of points and brief comments in the
margin (relating to the assessment criteria) allow both other teachers in the department and also external
moderators to see how the original teacher’s mark was arrived at. Unfocused ticking, at the end of every
page, paragraph or even sentence, does not contribute usefully to the dialogue between the original teacher
and others engaged in the moderation process. Likewise, unspecific comments such as ‘This work is very
good!’ do not assist the moderator.
5.6 Presentation of assignments

Assignments should be completed on A4 paper and may be handwritten or word-processed. If word
processed, the font size and type should be such as to guarantee readability. Small fonts are to be avoided
in word processed work in the same way as illegible script is in handwritten work. Discretion should be
exercised in choice of font and font size. Arial, point 11 or Times New Roman, point 12 are very good,
whereas ‘exotic’ fonts are not. Line spacing should ideally be set at 1.5. Whether word processed or
handwritten, the assignment should have margins that are sufficiently wide to enable teachers to make
suitable annotations.

Each piece must bear:
• centre number
• candidate number
• candidate name
• page numbers.
For the critical essay, the full title (not an abbreviation or approximation) must appear at the top of the first
page.
e.g. In what ways does Ibsen make you sympathise with Nora in A Doll’s House?
For the empathic response, both the name of the character and the chosen moment must be indicated at
the top of the first page:
e.g. Lady Macbeth – after the Banquet Scene (Act 3 Scene 4)
The written coursework should be attached by means of a treasury tag to the Individual Candidate Record
Card, in the following order:
• Critical Essay
• Empathic Response.
There is no requirement to submit drafts. Portfolios should not be submitted in plastic wallets, card folders
or ring-binder files.
5.7 Individual Candidate Record Cards

The card, together with teacher annotation of assignments, is the main contact between the school and
Cambridge’s external moderator. The card should set out the school’s definitive judgments on items in the
Coursework Portfolio.
Teachers should record a brief description of each assignment in the small box provided:
• the author and title of the critical essay text (the full title will be at the top of the essay’s first page)
• the character and moment for the empathic response
• the text and chosen character/theme for the oral response.
Space is provided for comments and marks for each of the three coursework assignments. The marks
should be the final moderated marks, and not the teacher’s original marks (where these differ).
Comments should justify the award of a particular mark by referring to the relevant descriptors in the
assessment criteria. The tone should be objective; there is no room for summaries of candidates’ personal
qualities or histories, which can play no part in the final judgment. For example, the fact that a candidate has
been a model student, has loved reading and has worked hard are not relevant to the moderation process.
Comments must relate to a candidate’s work and draw on the wording of the band descriptors.

The following are, respectively, examples of helpful and unhelpful comments relating to the Critical Essay:
Helpful
Shazia produced perceptive and convincing exploration of Heaney’s use of imagery, integrating clear critical
comment with pertinent well-selected references.
Unhelpful
Omar was absent from school during many of the lessons on Kafka’s short stories – so all things considered
he did very well in his assignment which can be best described as good work.
5.8 Internal standardisation

This should take place at intervals during the course in order to ensure that work in the three separate
coursework assignments is being assessed to a common standard. For example, teachers might discuss
a number of unmarked critical essays (covering the whole range of responses) and arrive at agreed marks
for each essay. This would take place before the close marking of the assignments by individual teachers.
The discussion would reveal whether any teacher is not marking to the agreed standard, perhaps as a result
of placing excessive or insufficient emphasis on a particular aspect of the criteria. Similar standardisation
exercises should take place in respect of the Empathic Response and the Oral Response.
Over time, it is useful to develop, for the purpose of departmental reference, an archive of responses
representing all bands.
5.9 Internal moderation

If several teachers in a school are involved in internal assessment, then the school must make sure that all
learners are assessed to a common standard in order to produce a reliable order of rank. Each school must
have one teacher responsible for internal moderation who must ensure that all work is marked according to
the assessment criteria, and not the teachers’ views of the personal qualities of learners.
Each of the three coursework assignments needs to be moderated separately using the relevant
assessment criteria.
Using the Empathic Response as an illustration, a sample of ten assignments could be marked by two or
more teachers (one of whom should be the Internal Moderator). Any differences in marking between the
Internal Moderator and other markers should be talked through and resolved. Then a further sample of ten
from another teacher’s marking might be compared with the standard of the first set and any adjustment
made. Marks can be adjusted from any part of the range of marks, and if there is a discernible trend of
leniency or severity, marks should be adjusted for other coursework in that range. If the trend is consistent,
it is possible to scale marks upwards or downwards without the need to re-mark all assignments within the
range affected.
If, however, there is no clear pattern and if learners are at risk of being awarded the wrong mark, more
assignments from that teacher’s marking should be marked and adjustments made until all doubt about the
accuracy of the marking has been removed. Samples should be re-marked from the remaining teachers’
marking until the process is complete. The Individual Candidate Record Cards should bear evidence of
amendments made as a result of internal moderation.

5.10 The sample for external moderation
Please note that the Individual Candidate Record Card and the Coursework Assessment Summary Form are
available in electronic format on the Cambridge Samples Database at www.cie.org.uk/samples. Simply
enter your Centre number and the syllabus code (0408) to access the forms (with instructions) and to view
other administrative information relating to the selection and size of the external moderation sample.
The sample submitted for external moderation should:
• represent the spread of marks across the entire ability range for the cohort, and include the top-scoring
piece of coursework; some middle-range marks and the lowest scoring piece of work
• include a balance of work from candidates across all teaching sets and assessors.
Each sample should:
• include the candidates’ coursework. This should comprise the two written assignments and and the
recording of the oral examination in each case. (The pages of the work of each candidate can simply be
stapled together with the Individual Candidate Record Card attached as the front page.)
• be clearly marked with candidates’ names and numbers, and your Centre’s name and number
• include the Coursework Assessment Summary Form(s)
• include a copy of the form MS1

60
Example of an Individual Candidate Record Card
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World Literature 0408/01
Individual Candidate Record Card
Cambridge IGCSE
Please read the previous printed instructions and the General Coursework Regulations before completing this form.
Centre Number Centre Name Exam Series Year
Candidate Number Candidate Name Teaching Group/Set
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Author and Title of Text
Assignment 1: Critical Essay bo Mark (out of 25)
Teacher’s Comments (and internal moderator’s further comments where applicable)
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Assignment 2: Empathic Response a Mark (out of 25)
Teacher’s Comments (and internal moderator’s further comments where applicable)

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Assignment 3:
Oral (Recorded Conversation) rk Mark (out of 15)
Teacher’s Comments (and internal moderator’s further comments where

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Text(s) studied for Paper 3 ew
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Signature and date
(to be transferred to Coursework Assessment
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61
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Example Coursework Assessment Summary Form
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x on-screen and then printed out.
x on-screen and then printed out; add any internally moderated marks by hand.
x printed out and completed on paper by hand. ok
Cambridge recommends that, wherever possible, the form is completed on-screen. The form will add up the candidates’ marks
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2. Additional copies of this form can be downloaded from the samples database www.cie.org.uk/samples. b
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Coursework Assessment Summary Form
Cambridge IGCSE
Please select Syllabus DQG Component
below
Please read the previous printed instructions and the General Coursework Regulations before completing this form.
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Centre Number Centre Name m
Exam Year
Candidate Candidate Name

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63
Cambridge International Examinations
1 Hills Road, Cambridge, CB1 2EU, United Kingdom
tel: +44 1223 553554 fax: +44 1223 553558
email: info@cie.org.uk www.cie.org.uk

0408 World Literature Coursework Handbook 2016 PDF

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0408 World Literature Coursework Handbook 2016 PDF

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Coursework Handbook

® IGCSE is the registered trademark of Cambridge International Examinations.

© Cambridge International Examinations 2016

Section 1: About the coursework ........................................................................................ 3

Section 2: The critical essay ................................................................................................ 5

Section 3: The empathic response .................................................................................... 28

Section 4: Oral response ................................................................................................... 42

Section 5: Coursework administration ............................................................................... 50

Advice and guidance

It offers advice and clarification on:

The address to which your queries should be sent is:

Telephone: +44 1223 553554

2 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

Section 1: About the coursework

1.1 Content of the coursework portfolio

Assignment Total marks Requirements

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 3

1.2 The advantages of coursework

1.3 Scheduling coursework

• the depth of their knowledge on their chosen topic

1.4 Scheme of work

Unit 5 Critical Essay

4 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

Section 2: The critical essay

Examples of suitable tasks

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 5

Examples of unsuitable tasks

Task 4 does not have a literary focus.

6 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

2.2 Critical essay – assessment criteria

Below Band 8 0/0–1 No answer/Insufficient to meet the criteria for Band 8.

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 7

2.3 Examples of assignment 1 critical essay

8 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 9

Word count, 1200

10 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 11

12 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

Word count, 1186

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 13

14 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

In ‘Prologue’ the diction “writhed”, an action of making twisting, squirming movements or

Word count, 1150

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 15

16 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 17

Word count, 1210

This is a secure Band 3 response, securing 19 marks.

18 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 19

Word count, 1189

20 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

Songs of Ourselves: The Cambridge International Examinations Anthology of Poetry in English

Mid Term Break- Seamus Heaney

Death of a Naturalist, Faber and Faber Poetry 2006

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 21

22 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

Word count, 1077

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 23

24 Cambridge IGCSE World Literature

Word count, 1074

Cambridge IGCSE World Literature 25