I remember when I first received the book ​Beloved​.

I honestly thought I was going to

hate it because it is an AP assigned reading, but truth be told the book made me a better reader

than I ever thought any book would. These were not simple annotations as I’ve done for other

books. They were merely summary plots and more about the thoughts I had on the problems

Beloved​ brought up involving slavery, racism, love and hate, the supression of women in

society, the horror of offering one’s self for sex and plenty more. I will admit that in the beggining

it was not easy to understand the book. It was as if we as the readers were put in the middle of

the story instead of the beginning. Kind of a like a movie where we get into the middle of the

action. But as I continued to read, I became more interested and thus my CRJ annotations and

reading skills became that much better.

At first, the way I annotated was through pages and less with chapters. The reason for

this is because I thought that if I’d do a CRJ for every fifth to tenth page I can have time to

process what has occured consistently. This was helpful to some extent because I was able to

do four CRJ’s one on page of the notebook. What I could not do was develop my critical thinking

involving the questions I had about the plot and the things I personally believe are wrong or right

in the book. There is a difference that can be seen in my annotations as I started to annotate by

chapters beggining with chapter nine. I only do two or one CRJ annonations. This being an

impact on me as a reader because I allowed myself to go more into the questions that I was

asking and the words I found beautiful. Such as on page.101 I noted the word “down” having

such a strong impact on Sethe because the reader gets to know her as a person filled with such

iron in her eyes and for someone to tell her to let her guard down means Sethe becoming

emotionally vulnerable in a sense letting life take over. If I continued to annonate by pages and

not chapters there is a good chance I would of missed this important piece of the development

for Sethe’s character. Plus, the only thing I ever did once was misread in the beggining (1d of
the CRJ) of the book. I may have been confused about things, but because of the annontations

my reading has been more clear.

To continue, one of the things I did incorrect as a critical reader was summarizing. It was

less about analyzing the figurative language (5c) and more about stating what was occuring. I

improved as I continued with chapter annontations because on the CRJ for chapter ten, I state a

contribution to the plot of the book and not a summary. It was the scene of a male slave being

raped by a guard and Paul D. seeing/hearing the groans and torture at the corner of his eye.

The reason I give to how this aids the plot is it portrays the darkness Paul D. went through in

slavery overall helping to develop his character and bring meaning the tin can in his chest.

Moving on towards the middle chapters, in the chapter seventeen CRJ, one of the things I

started to really pay attention to was the specific word choices and how they helped build

meaning to the figurative language. Where I became a better critical reader in noticing the fact

that the way Toni Morrison depicted Sethe like a Hawk was not because a Hawk is a bird and

symbolizes something, it is quite literally a comparison through Sethe by using words like “flew”

(ran) and “snatching” as a Hawk would do with their food or target. I paint myself a better picture

by not only taking in the words, but by rereading too because in rereading I was able to unlock

the ability to see the chapters in different perspectives.

Moving forward, another way I improved my as a reader was in annotating the sentences

of a book. Something I did not do for reading via a novel. This is a big imporvement for me

because it is not the fact that it paints me a better image of a scene, but because it helps me to

understand the tone and speaknig style of a character. Such as in page.187 when Sethe was

pacing back and forth talking to herself I annontated that there was constant periods

symbolizing the fact that constant thoughts are going through Sethe’s head. Overfiling in a

sense. If I have not annotated for the syntax, I may have never truly understood the importance
for the constant periods. I also do this again on the CRJ chapter 22 where Beloved is narrating.

Noticing and being surprised as a reader that the author can make the choice to include big

spaces between sentences and paragraphs. This allowed me to see just how strange the book

is in the sense that Beloved is not human. She does not stutter and she states normal

sentences as if quoting shakespeare. Only the fact is, I notice Beloved’s character is a baby

who died gruesomely. Going into depth as far as coming up with the theory that towards the end

of the book Beloved begins to lose her mind just as she begins to lose a tooth and possibly

decompose like a dead body.

Lastly, one of the ways I improved as a critical reader was through coming up with

theories not only about what might happen later on in the book, but through the theories of what

occured in real life such as in slavery (via CRJ chapter 24). One theory I (personally) carried

onto one of the early paideia’s of Beloved was when Paul D. discovered his worth mentioning

even the worth of his penis. I questioned this (something I would usually sway) and it brought

me into the mindset of slave owners and why might a males privates would hold a price. The

reason being the same as the price for breeding animals, owning a male and female slave

would multiply more slaves. The theory brought me chills in the sense that I could be right

because throughout Beloved another issue brought up was the fact that mothers do not always

see their children and are seperated so soon maybe because there are so many for some

handle, thus they are sold. This theory itself is one I would of not normally thought if I did not

take the chance to break the barriers of normal annotations involving why a character did this

and becuase of that this happened. Even so, I began to question the characters choices and

motives which is an improvement because instead of summarizing what they are doing (such as

I did for the scene of when Sethe was paying with sex in the cemetery) I wondered why they did

things such as Beloved scratching her hand when she was asked a question or Denver being so
distant with her mother (via the reason being the fact that she was afraid of what she would do

for ‘love’). Plus, I make connections from the end of the book to a part in the beginning which is

how Toni Morrison organized her story. Multiple questions in the beginning and mulitple

answers in the end such as when Sethe was stating that Paul D. ran her (Beloved) off not

saying when but the reader knows it was in the kitchen scene of Paul D. shouting at the house

where the creaks and noises suddenly stopped where afterwards Beloved came in the flesh. A

wonderful thing Morrison chose to do that provided insight to me a reader and writer on how

essays, articles, blogs, and novels can be written and not just the typical style of introduction,

paragraph then conclusion.

As a result, because I continued to read through ​Beloved​ and annontate continuosly

through the chapters, I not only became a better reader, but I also became a more

sophosticated critical thinker as well as a writer because I am discovering what my voice sounds

like not only in essays but also in the way I annonate things because what me and another

person may be the same in the sense of the same scene, I know I have a perspective that takes

importance in better understanding plot and development of characters. Not just simple

summaries.