Razika Almira

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The Answer of “What is Love?”

In the essay entitled “What is Love? Five Theories on the Greatest Emotion of All” the
author proposed five ideas and theories since the sentence “what is love?” is the most popular
search on Google in 2012 The ideas are proposed by the experts in different fields, they are from
science, psychotherapy, literature, religion, and philosophy. I think the ideas and theories from
different fields and stated by the experts would open our knowledge. And hopefully, the
definition of love that people have been questioning would give us an insight.

The first theory is proposed by the physicist whose name is Jim Al-Khalili. He is a
theoretical physicist and science writer. Jim Al-Khalili stated that love is chemistry and a
powerful neurological condition like hunger or thirst but more permanent. It is not so surprising
that love is basically chemistry. In true love, or attachment and bonding, the brain can release a
whole set of chemicals, like pheromones, dopamine, norepinepherine, serotonin, oxytocin, and
vasopressin. He also said that from an evolutionary perspective, love can be seen as a
mechanism we have evolved to promote long-term relationships, mutual defence, and parental
support of children to promote feelings safety and security. Love is a survival tool. I agree with
his last statement which is viewed from evolutionary perspective. For people who love each
other, like families, they would do anything to protect their loved ones from anything that could
harm and hurt them. And this attempt is surely a survival tool. I remember as a kid I was always
ben told that if there is something not okay, there will always be some people to rely on, and
those are my parents. They told me that just to keep me calm and secure.

The second theory is proposed by the psychotherapist whose name is Philippa Perry. She
is a psychotherapist and author of Couch Fiction. Philippa Perry states that the word love itself
does not involved one word, instead they had several variations. She proposed the theory by
defining all the various emotions brought by the ancients. First is philia, is a non-sexual intimacy
between close friends and family members. Second, ludus explains love as a more playful
affection in flirting. Pragma is the love that grows over a long period of time and becomes
mature in a long-term relationship between couples that involves practicing goodwill,
compromise, commitment, and understanding. Agape is love in general, love for humanity.
Philautia is self love which was found by Aristotle that we need to care about ourselves in order
to be able to care for others. And the last is eros, it is about sexual passion and desire. It is stated
that ”unless it morphs into philia and/or pragma, eros will burn itself out.” At the end of the
paragraph, she stated the existence of family and community is important. I agree with some of
the definitions and disagree with some others. I agree with the definitions of philia, pragma,
agape, and philautia. All of them are explaining the wide meaning of love. I do not agree with
the definitions of ludus and eros. For me, a playful affection in flirting does not define love. I
think it describes spoiled rather than love. I also do not agree with sexual passion and desire as
the meaning of love. I think they come from lust and are human nature.

The third theory is proposed by the philosopher whose name is Julian Baggini. He is a
philosopher and a writer. Julian Baggini stated that love is not a simple one thing, love has
different forms, variations, and qualities. As he stated “Love for parents, partners, humanity,
children, country, God, and so on. It can be blind, one sided, tragic, steadfast, fickle, misguided,
reciprocated, unconditional. At its best, however, all love is a kind a passionate commitment that
we nurture and develop, even though it usually arrives in our lives unbidden.” And those
explains why love is a very powerful feeling. We have to keep the commitment, passion, and
nurturing. I agree with this idea because love is not only a magical feeling to partners or families,
but with some others that we have affection for. Love also have different variants but for all, love
is a passionate commitment we keep although there are things blocking our way.

The fourth idea is proposed by a romantic novelist, Jojo Moyes. He is a two-time winner
of the Romantic Novel of the Year award. Jojo Moyes proposed that love depends on our role in
the relation. Love can be ordinary, important, pain, or obsession. Love is the controller for great
stories, not just the romantic ones but also the love for family, for country.

The last theory is proposed by the nun, named Catherine Wybourne. She stated that
“Love is more easily experienced than defined.” She also explains love as a theological virtue,
by which our love for others (family, friends, neighbours, country, etc) is the other form of our
love to God. Love can be viewed as acts of kindness, generosity, and self-sacrifice. Love can
never hurt anyone, but it may costs dearly. The nun also stated that love is free yet it connects us
with bonds us stronger than death. At the end of the paragraph the nun also stated “love is life’s
greatest blessing.” I readily agree with the nun’s statement which our love to human is another
shape of our love to God. I also agree with the statement of the perspective of love that can be
viewed as acts of kindness, generosity, and self-sacrifice. However, the love itself cannot be
defined as narrow as those three words. It is more and wider than them. Kindness, generosity,
and self-sacrifice are only some of many good deeds that may leads us to the meaning of love. I
do not agree with the statement that love can never hurt anyone because it truly hurts us if the
ones we love are leaving us. The thing that hurts us the most is the love itself. If there is no love
in relationship between us and the one who left, there will be no pain and heartache.

This diversity of meanings combined with the complexity of the feelings involved makes
love unusually difficult to define, compared to other emotional states. After all, the meaning of
love is wide. Love is not only the powerful feeling we had to our partners, but there is also love
for God, family, friends, neighbours, country, and humanity. Love in science (biology and
chemistry) is a state where some hormones released and the amount increased. Love can be seen
as kindness, generosity, goodwill, commitment, and understanding. Despite all of the definitions
of love according to experts in various fields, they are all refer to the feeling of affection and
tenderness that we show or we feel and it is a feeling of strong attraction and emotional
attachment. Love can also be a virtue representing human kindness, compassion, and affection
towards other human, one’s self, or animals. If there is no signs of love happening on us, or if we
do not feel the love of others anymore, and we do not feel as if there is something missing in our
lives, there might be something wrong in our personality and mentality, and yet, it is a question
whether we are human or not. The love itself plays an important role in the life of ours. It is the
function of love to keep human beings together to facilitate the continuation of the species.