SEPTEMBER (FIRST) 2017 ` 50

30 Int’l
HIGHLY Cookery
PALATABLE Special
DELICACIES
 Founder: Vishwa Nath (1917-2002)

SEPTEMBER (FIRST) 2017

Vol 44, Issue No. 1050
womansera.com BUILDS HAPPY HOMES
Cookery

36
ALL CONTINENTAL

Bolivian Saltenas
Sausage Roll
Hungarian Langos
German Vegetarian
Pita with Peri Peri
Humus with Salad
Barki Samosa
Italian Potato Circles
Cevapi from Bosnia
Baledas from Honduras
Chelo Kebab with Salad Auf Lauf Vegetarian Quiche with Garlic and Olives Vegetarian Doner
Chicken Rice with Baked Stuffed Tomatoes Chicken Swarma Dumplings Kebab
Mayonnaise Topping with Risotto Pita Pockets with Hot Dog with Roti Kanhai
South African Bunny Chow Bread Samosa from Pakistan Meat Balls Avocado Puree Pita Pockets with Falafel
with Chikpeas Mutton Shammi Kebabs Crispy Taco Shells with Red Nasi Goreng Chilli Corn
Kikomando from Uganda Mac and Cheese Kidney Beans and Cheese Chicken Quiche Uzbek Palov
14 FOODS & MOODS 70 PERSONAL REJECTION
Articles

I.M. Soni Sudha Chandrasekaran

16 HOW TO DRESS UP 72 TIRTHAN VALLEY
DURING MOONSOON Aatur Sharma
Mansi Mhendru
100 DENIM ON DENIM
30 EVERYDAY, Anupriya Khanna
A GOOD HAIR DAY 106 TRIP IT OUT!
Garima Beri
Saumya Shresth
32 A SCIENCE –

07 66
NOT A RELIGION 108 ALLURING PATNITOP
Richa Hegde
Rashmi Bhargava
63 BECAUSE CLEANLINESS 114 SAY YES TO
I LOVE YOU IS THE KEY WEIGHTS – LOSS THE HONEYMOONERS
Sudesh Gogia Shubhangi Singh
Tanya Malik Sanjana Saini

24
5 FASHION TIPS
FOR SUMMERS

10 20 82
Ananya Tondon

WHAT DO GIRLS DO 7 THINGS MEN

WHEN THEY’RE HOME THE PUFF OF CASUAL NOTICE ABOUT
ALONE? RELATIONSHIPS WOMEN RIGHT AWAY
Vibhor Sharma Saumya Shresth Nandini Chakraborty
 18 BEAUTY QUERIES 105 I AM PREGNANT
34 PERSONAL PROBLEMS 115 PINKS AND
PEACHES!
69 YOUR BODY
120 MUMBAI FILMDOM
75 TEENACHE 26 SILENCE 122 SAY ‘CHEESE’!
127 CHILD CHALLENGES Kishni K. Pandita SMILE PLEASE
99 MY FAMILY, 76 MY DRAGONFLY Vijay Pant
MY FRIENDS AND ME... 128 CLASSIFIEDS Meena Murdeshwar 124 PADMA
Ashok Patwari
78 WHATEVER
HAPPEYNS, HAPPENS

Features FOR THE GOOD -

COINCIDENCE
Suman Bajpai
67 JEWELLERY AND
YOU (QUIZ)
113 THE INCIDENT
I CANNOT FORGET
102 MONSOON REVERIE
Valsala Menon
Fiction
Contests

Editor & Printer Publisher

128 NEIGHBOURS ALL
Readers’

DIVESH NATH PARESH NATH

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BUNGEE JUMPING
Devyani

EDITORIAL
HOSPITALS OF DOOM
C
hildren are said to be wealth of future. As such, they
need all care and protection to grow as healthy
citizens. But is our system, especially the healthcare
system, competent enough to protect newborn babies and
children? Private healthcare givers certainly have an edge
over the government ones in this regard.
Death of more than thirty chidlren at Baba Raghav Das
(BRD) Hospital in Gorakhpur puts a serious question mark
on the facilities provided for children’s treatment at
government hospitals, which are far below the standard.
Before the tremors set in by these deaths could die down,
reports came in of several deaths of children in Raipur
hospital. In Gorakhpur hopsital, the person responsible for
supplying oxygen was sleeping after consuming alcohol. In
Raipur, doctors as well as Chhattisgarh’s health secretary is
giving explanation that children died due to illness.
It is easy to guess the level of anarchy in a hospital
where staff responsible for oxygen supply finds time and
opportunity to drink liquor, knowing fully well that lives of
infants depend on uniterrupted supply of oxygen. Did he
not have the least realisation that his carelessness could
take several lives? Hospital administration blames the
oxygen supplying company for stopping supply for non-
payment of dues. It is again ridiculous as to why its dues
were not cleared on time. Where was the lapse? Ironically,
oxygen was available in Raipur hospital, but it was not
provided on time. Why?
After every such tragedy entire administration tries to
hide the reasons instead of owning responsibility. The logic
of medical staff in Raipur hospital that children died due
to illness is itself absurd. People visit hospitals and get
admitted there when they suffer from some serious
illnesses. Otherwise, why would a healthy person visit a
hospital – apart from seeing a friend or relative admitted
there?
Criminal negligence of duty is the order of the day in
government hospitals because most of the patients who
visit there belong to poor classes. They usually tolerate all
such negligence as their fate though receiving efficient
medical treatment is their basic human right. Medical staff
needs to be sensitised towards their duty apart from
developing their proficiency. Death of children in Raipur
hospital indicates that Gorakhpur incident failed to
generate proper sensitiveness among medical staff in other
parts of the country. Both Uttar Pradesh and Chhattisgarh
are ruled by BJP, which believes in ‘development for all’
slogan. But can they claim to be sensitive also?
6 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
BLOW TO TRIPLE TALAQ
T
he apex court’s deicsion on triple talaq has come like
a death blow to this age-old evil practice. It is in
accordance with basic principles and values
enshrined in the Constitution. Its decision must be
welcomed by one and all. Now, no Muslim man would be
able to say ‘Talaq’ three times to get rid of his wife in an
arbitrary manner. It is clearly a victory for the Muslim
women and will induce in them a feeling of greater self-
confidence, equality and empowerment.
Triple talaq has been a bane for Muslim women. Besides,
scores of common women, Meena Kumari, one of the most
adorable actresses of her time, was the victim of triple
talaq. Her husband, Kamal Amrohi gave her instant talaq in
the heat of anger. Later, when his anger subsided and he
tried to reconcile, Meena Kumari had to undergo the
trauma in the name of Halala again.
Looked in wider perspective, it is a victory of all
womenfolk irrespective of their religious beliefs. The apex
court has put its seal on equal rights of women sidelining
religious customs or traditions. Still, it is not a unanimous
decision, as two members of the 5-member Bench,
including the Chief Justice, opposed it. It is not surprising, as
triple talaq has always been a disputed and senstive matter
as it accorded men supremacy in deciding marital issues.
Ironically, these same men do not oppose evils that provide
them undue benefits, such as polygamy.
It is the culmination of struggle of a number of Muslim
women, who had challenged this practice in various courts.
But if it could reach its logical conclusion, there were
several other reasons too. There were voices of protest
against it from among the Muslim community itself. All
India Muslim Personal Law Board (AIMPLB) kept repeating
its old stand that triple talaq is religious matter and any
interference in it by the government or court would be
breach of religious freedom as guaranteed by the
Constitution. But the apex court took this matter seriously.
Even the Central government had made it clear that
triple talaq is not a purely Islamic issue but is related to
protection of Muslim women from injustice and their
fundamental rights. Now, the Centre has to discharge its
constitutional duty by implementing this decision through
law. Our Constitution provides religious freedom but only to
the extent it does not violate individual freedom. Even
Muslim Personal Law Board knew it that it could not hold
triple talaq valid on constitutional basis. So, it proposed to
make certain amendments in ‘Niqahnama’ for safeguarding
women’s rights. However, the court gave weightage to
constitutional provisions.
But this is not the end of fight for Muslim women. Still,
they have to fight against several other evils, like Halala
(required for second marriage after divorce) and
maintenance for themselves and their children. It is just a
beginning of another fight for equal rights for them. It is
hoped that the apex court’s decision will usher in a new
awakening among Indians in this century.
write to: editor@womansera.com We
 lack of polarity and possibly that sex
isn't really feeling that 'great' for
her compared to 'you'. She's going
to lose interest in lovemaking, in
sex! Does she get orgasm when she
has sex? What do you usually do
together and how frequently do
you? Do you foreplay before the
act? Do you really enjoy the
foreplay, kissing, ejaculation?
Last night, I lovingly brought a
bouquet of flowers and with a
romantic phase of mind invited her
to come and she surprisingly let me
get started. Then all of a 'sudden'
she said she had some urgent piece
of work and immediately went
away!

Psychological facts

IL
Her body has natural
urges but her mind overrides
them because she's
emotionally checking out of your
relationship. That's why she is
pulling away every time. Also, if
sex is not that satisfying to her,
she won't be eager! "We don't
fight but she says she is 'unhappy'
and has been in this state
for a long time. What
is she unhappy
about? She says

M
o u
"It's her, not

vo e Y
y wife and I are struggling. skills, not me!”
She says, "I love you, but found in any
more like a friend!" These sexual
were the utterances from the books. You
couples married for years. In our can have a
modern culture of equality, polarity hot sensual
gets hammered in beautiful masculine-
relationship. Is it women's feminine
empowerment in this 21st century? love
How to further your love-life in relationship
such a ticklish situation? How to and help her to
take control? How to lead her, open make your
her sensuality and trust her? How to woman the way you
enable her to be ecstatically happy love her.
and relaxed? And make her restore I'm sorry to hear all this
your love-life as she has started when men talk about their women's
treating you like her friend. How to behaviour. But more like a
encase this phenomenon? How not She shows little interest in love-
to feel offended and not feel bad making friend.
and take responsibility? This Says one of the men on my
situation is spreading like a jungle mobile, "In fact, last night she
By Prof. Sudesh Gogia
fire in the world today. snuggled, it was cold, blatant,
You can get her to talk and rubbish behaviour. For many
discuss by being easy to try new women, all over the world, there's a

Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017 7

 "Oh it's 'you too, darling. It's not
just her!" Though she's likely
evolved since you two got together,
and perhaps she feels disconnected
from you. Just exacerbated by the
lack of physical and emotional
intimacy, her feelings are definitely
stemming from her interactions
with you.
She's just not feeling like she can
be honest and tell you the truth,
which means her frustrations are
likely about sex and may be money -
you're not earning enough!
She is doing too much, you're
not attractive to her anymore. Have
you taken care of yourself? You're
not sexually satisfying her. She's
bored out of her mind with
lovemaking! These are pretty classic
issues in a long-term relationship
and I'm sure she feels guilty even
thinking about them. It's weird but
she talks most of the time like
everything is okay even about the
future but not about relationship.
When it comes to sex she says she
just doesn't want to!
She doesn't want to because
she's 'terribly dissatisfied' and
doesn't want to hurt your feelings.
She thinks you can't meet her needs
based on past performance! You
can see why she doesn't want to
talk about it. There's a problem of
other issues feeding into her
dissatisfaction. Here's what I can
tell you. From my extensive
experience as a lecturer, yoga
8 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
teacher and, for more than four
decades and a counsellor to many
Institutions, and my own vantage
point talking to a LOT of women all
over the world about their sex lives
and relationships at very cordial
confidential and honest levels. It's
that your woman is looking for a
way out of your door!
She's possibly biding her time,
getting her stuff in order, what if
she's done with you? Checking out
emotionally, saying it's, "her not
you" – classic signs! Now, what the
hack do you do to save this? And I
assume you still love her and want
to make everything in order and at
the right place.
I notice that, when a guy realises,
his marriage is in danger, she has
already put her foot out of the door!
Already dating someone else and
THESE EXPRESSIONS
MADE ME TO PONDER
OVER AND THINK.
THESE TYPES OF
WOMEN WANT AN
OPPORTUNITY TO
HAVE SOME LIFE
EXPERIENCES! SOME
DO IT CONFIDENTIALLY
AS THESE TYPES OF
WOMEN SEEM
EXTROVERTED AND
ARE BEGGING THIS
EXPERIENCE OPENLY.
they're just waking up to the fact
that she's not satisfied. It is
blindsides for men which is too little
too late.
Now I could be wrong! It's not
like you have given me much info.
However, just from what you've
said, this is a major issue and you
need to get on it immediately.
It's time to sit down with her.
You must find a way to make it safe
for her to tell you the real and
complete truth about what's going
on. Just listen – calmly and
patiently. Ask clarifying questions?
Pull her out... Don't let her hide her
feelings. You are the man. Handle it.
Don't freak out, just hear her and
give yourself 'time to digest'.
Your Patience Vs her freedom
Tell her that you want to make
her happy. And you know her needs
have changed over the years you've
been together. You want to sit
down, over evening tea or dinner
and do the work book together. All
you have to do is think, ponder
about what are the most important
things for you in being in a
relationship. One of the women, when
I interacted with her, immediately
put forward the following:
“I want my freedom first. My
relationship value is my personal
freedom. We live in the 21st centuryl
It's my prerogative.” These
expressions made me to ponder
over and think. These types of
women want an opportunity to
have some life experiences! Some
do it confidentially as these types of
women seem extroverted and are
begging this experience openly. I
directed her husband to ask her,
"What does this 'freedom' mean to
you?"
Marriage a distinct Institution
What she wanted from a
marriage in her 20s. It will be totally
different than in her 30s, 40s, 50s,
60s and 70s so on. Ask her with
patience, tenacity and wisdom.
"What do you need sexually?”
"What is your desire?"
"How much foreplay and
aftermath you want?"
"Do you want more orgasms or
multiorgasms?" It's the phase of life
to be more honest, how
muchyou're true to yourself.
"If still she wants to quit, allow
her to kiss your marriage and say
goodbye!" I know, when I advised
him, these lines sounded harsh, but
it's the truth. And you can handle it
with more consciousness, wisdom
and freedom.
I received the e-mail after a
week's time. It said that they're a
happy couple. We
Ambition - it is the last infirmity of
noble minds.
What do
Girls
Do when
they’re
Home Alone?
Wouldnʼt you like to know?
By Vibhor Sharma

G
irls these days are extremely enterprising. The fact that
they’re 21st century modern, educated, urban, liberal
minded girls, who have always been raised on the principles
of being independent and self-reliant, is reason enough to never let
them feel dejected or bogged down at any of life’s phases. So,
when it comes to them being home alone an occasion when their
parents and/or boyfriend is out of town, girls being the fun,
feminine, spirited creatures that they always are, will see to it that
they are able to turn this otherwise boring event into an enjoyable,
fun-filled one! So, what exactly do girls do when they’re all alone at
home at the mercy of none but their own ingenuity?

Body pampering
When a girl is home alone with neither of the parents to holler at
her, she will most certainly be seen indulging in pampering her body
and enhancing her beauty! Rituals may involve trying out new and
innovative hairstyles, bizarre hair colouring, nail polishing and
styling, doing home-made facial treatments to increase
fairness and reduce pimples/pigmentation, etc. While
beauty treatments are the number- one priority of
every young girl these days, some girls may even go
a step ahead and try on temporary body tattoos,
body piercings, and what all and what not!
While not all may prefer to go hardcore on
their bodies, some may just like to grab the
occasion and take the day off to enjoy a
nice, calming warm bubble bath in the
tub with soothing music playing, in
order to completely de-stress and detoxify.

Throwing a house party

So what if she can’t go to the party? The
party can most certainly come over to her place!
Girls will leave absolutely no opportunity in order
to have a good time. Seeing their parents and elders
are out of town for a day or two, girls,
finding themselves home alone will
jump and grab the opportunity to
throw a random house party for their
closest of friends. And once that’s
decided, all that is required is to send
out messages on social media, and let
the good times roll. Good food,
awesome drinks, great music and a
bunch of cool, happening youngsters,
and voila! – there you have a fabulous
house party. By throwing random
house parties for no rhyme or reason,
girls want to prove to all of their
friends that being “cool” is in their
blood, and the fact that a girl can
randomly throw a party and still make
it a success, is reason enough for her
peers to believe that she truly is the
goddess of partying.
Watching love stories, horror
movies, or porn
Being movie buffs that all girls are,
it is but natural for them to grab the
occasion of being home alone and
transform it into a night-long movie
marathon. But here’s the twist. While
on regular days, girls would be seen
enjoying a comedy or an action film,
however, on the day when they’re all
alone, girls will pounce on their
freedom of choice, and choose to
watch either those typical mushy
Hollywood love stories, those
gruesome blood-curdling horror
movies that will lead to sleepless
nights which girls are totally okay
with, or Porn! Yes! When girls are
home alone, they leave no stone
unturned in order to watch the largest
variety of porn that is freely
accessible on the Internet. Gone are
the days when girls used to lend and
12
borrow XXX content in schools and
colleges. With the advent of super-
fast Internet, watching super-fast,
high quality porn is but a click away.
And the pros of porn, you may ask?
Girls know better! If nothing else,
watching porn most assuredly helps
them be updated with the latest
forms of achieving quickies with their
boyfriend.
Online shopping and social media
While during regular days girls are
caught up with their daily chores and
are forced to exercise restraint, when
it comes to being online, however,
when they’re home alone with no one
to order them around, they will
pounce upon their laptops or tablets
and indulge in online shopping to
their heart’s content. From lingerie to
luxury clothing, girls will be seen
going gaga over every apparel,
handbag, footwear, and beauty
product that online shopping
destinations have to offer. After-
wards, having exhausted all their
funds and energies over clothing
(some of which, in all probability they
will never wear), girls will thereafter
hook themselves to their social media
profiles – namely Facebook, Twitter,
Instagram, WhatsApp, etc. – and
spend the remaining part of the day
and night chatting determinedly with
friends over issues that range from
the magnificent to the mundane. Girls
will also catch up with their old
friends who, though existing in their
Friends List, but with whom the same
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
childhood bond of friendship, never
rekindled in adulthood.
Food fest
Girls are extremely particular of
what they eat and when they eat.
They are also very precise about
spices, oil, and condiments that are
put in their food, as, an excess of
these, will lead to bloating of the belly
and as a result make them
overweight. However, when girls are
left at home alone, they tend to
forget everything about healthy
eating and don’t for a second hesitate
from either cooking heavily oiled
foods, or even – better – ordering fast
food and restaurant food in
abundance. Couple that with calorie-
bursting milkshakes, high caffeine and
cocoa-rich cold coffees, teeth-
corroding soft drinks, or liver-
damaging booze, and there they have
in front of them – gluttony in its finest
form. Girls most genuinely feel that
following a strict diet and exercise
regime is pivotal to looking and
feeling good. However, they are also
of the opinion that having a ‘cheat
day’ of food-binging is an absolute
must in order to soothe the taste
buds and feel ecstatic. And what
better occasion than to do it than
when they’re home alone? We
Talent is God given. Be humble.
Fame is man-given. Be grateful.
Conceit is self-given. Be careful.

O
ne tomato a day is unlikely to
turn you into a heart-throb of
your vicinity, but a balanced
diet can dispel your blues and convert
you into a sprightly sprite. Foods and
moods go together.
A sprightly woman is full of verve
and naturally exudes that marvellous
quality called “oomph” or sex appeal.
Passion has been studied in a
dispassionate way. Raw materials of
romance have been identified. There
is, thus, no need to live a listless and
loveless life.
Libido is a polite word for overt
appreciation of the opposite sex.
Paraminobenzonic acid, one of the B
Vitamins, increases libido. It spars the
secretions of vital glands and makes
the zippy human chemicals go further
in the performance of their duty. It
also keeps one’s personal steam
pressure at its best.
Indifferent, sunk-in-the-blues,
snappish women turn vivacious when
put on Vitamin B diets. Men too
respond in a similar manner. Their I-
couldn’t-care attitudes turn them into
whistling Romeos.
Woman starved of stipulating diets
becomes edgy, complains of chronic
fatigue and loses interest in love.
Interestingly, the most distressing
type of fatigue does not result from
14
It all depends on the right food.
By I. M. Soni
muscular exertion as is commonly
supposed. The love-destroyer,
dragging fatigue is the one that
affects the central nervous system. It
sinks the personality without a trace
and results in irritability and
touchiness which eats away romance.
It spurs one to hit those we love.
Deficiency of vitamin C also cause
fatigue. This vitamin too has sex
appeal. An experiment conducted on
old bulls considered too stale for
breeding were fed on the vitamin.
They were restored to reproductive
efficiency. Most “old” cows too
responded favourably when treated
likewise.
Equally, if not more vital, are the
proteins. They step up the steam,
revitalise the body to a higher plane
which is necessary for sex efficiency
and frequency.
Proteins are made up of smaller
units called amino acids. They can be
compared to bricks in a wall. Bricks
are handy for constructing different
kinds of walls. In a like manner, the
body performs this function when it is
fed adequate proteins. These “bricks”
build such structures as liver cells,
hair, skin and several other units
which eventually give you the look
you have.
Experiments conducted on
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
animals revealed amazing results.
When starved of amino acid, the
animals lost hair and were reduced to
infertility. Premature balding in
human beings results from the same
cause. This, however, does not mean
that baldness can be cured through
massive doses of amino acid. Baldness
could result from other cause too.
Best source of “oomph” materials
are meat, milk, eggs and fish. Beans
and peas are also rich in proteins.
If you want to be in proper mood
through food, you have to ensure that
you and your blood stream are not
anaemic. It takes red blood to make a
fullblooded woman or man.
THE BEST FOOD
The best food is liver. Another
good source is dark molasses which is
rich in iron. Eggs and apricots too
count. Iron plays a big role in fighting
anemia.
You may be an expert cook but you
cannot prepare a good meal if you are
sunk in the blues. The mental stage is
as important as the ingredients of the
meal. If you are in the upward swing,
the better the functioning of your
system, the greater the storehouses
of energy inside you.
When a woman constantly
complains of lack of interest in life
and lovemaking, she needs a hard
look at her food. No medicine may be
required at all. All she may need is a
well-balanced diet with plenty of
roughage and water.
When you feel weak, dizzy and
tired, you are bound to lose interest in
people who matter most. One
housewife puts it, “I am sure it is a
case of bad nerves. I am unable to
decide anything.”
Such women fill their system with
toxic, substances overdoing on rich
sauces, spic and overcooked dishes.
Yet they lament that their mind
remains foggy, listless.
There is also indiscretion in the
type of foods they shovel down their
throat. Such an attitude is sure to
result in deficiency in vitamins,
minerals, right amount of sugars,
starches and fats.
MIND OVER MATTER
Mind over matter has a valid basis,
in fact. But unless the physical factor
is set right, no amount of mental
acrobatics will result in efficiency and
happiness. The mood of listlessness
will persist. Muddy systems cannot
run crystal steams in them.
For example, your liver is not
functioning at its best. Toxic
substances remain inside the system.
They are not being eliminated
properly.
No amount of treatment at the
psychological level will help as the
liver requires therapeutic treatment.
Overlooking the organic disease
amounts to inviting danger through
neglect.
When a young woman dejectedly
declares that she is lacking interest in
love or is losing her sex appeal, she
must sit up and watch her diet. No
amount of thick layers of make-up will
make the sparks fly.
Such women are example of
deficiency in foods resulting in charm
and comehitherness. A pronounced
decline in protein food is the cause.
Most cases are outcome of women
going on a reducing spree without
consulting a competent physician.
The right amount of protein is
needed for the normal functioning of
love organs. Lack or decline of the
quantity causes the sex desire to take
a nosedive.
Vitamin E is important as general
fertility is concerned. This is present in
many ordinary foods but wholewheat
grains when sprouted after soaking
are a rich source.
Most women overeat, to
overstimulate, hence weaken their
nerves. The aim should be to plan
eating so that nervous system is
strengthened. You should, therefore,
carefully watch your intake of tea,
coffee and cocoa.
Women suffering from bad
“nerves” ought to be extra cautions.
They must refrain from overuse of
these beverages. However, personal
difference vary as reactions to
caffeine (in the tea and coffee) and
theobomine (in cocoa) are not the
MIND OVER MATTER
HAS A VALID BASIS, IN
FACT. BUT UNLESS THE
PHYSICAL FACTOR IS
SET RIGHT, NO AMOUNT
OF MENTAL
ACROBATICS WILL
RESULT IN EFFICIENCY
AND HAPPINESS. THE
MOOD OF LISTLESSNESS
WILL PERSIST. MUDDY
SYSTEMS CANNOT RUN
CRYSTAL STEAMS IN
THEM.
same in every case. Those taut and
fidgety must watch their reactions.
There is no substitute to eating
substantially wholesome food. Not
even vitamins and minerals. They
remain a poor substitute for food.
Science is constantly discovering new
elements in the food we eat.
Those who hitch their health
wagon to vitamins alone, the risk and
missing out on nutritive elements in
food increase.
A few suggestions:
Avoid emotional excitement which
causes upsets and affects your
romantic moods.
Avoid excessive talking at the
dinner table.
Keep smiling. Be pleasant at meal
time. Laugh a little.
Do not “order” about hubby
or children simply because they
are a little late at the meal time.
Do not scold the daughter if she
has messed up a meal.
Observe reasonable spells of
silence. Improve surroundings
where your family eats.
Do not rush for chores while
others are still at the dining table. We
Let us always meet each other
with smile, for the smile is the
beginning of love.
 How to
M
onsoon in India usually starts
from July and lasts till
September. No doubt it is
the most romantic season as it makes
everything around us look so fresh
and lively but at times it gets on our
nerves. Long traffics, muddy roads,
inconvenience, drenched clothes and
the thing that annoys and bugs us the
most is choosing the right attire.
Don’t worry readers. Here are six
tips you should keep in mind during
monsoons while dressing up.
Colours
Avoid wearing light colours like
whites and greys. They tend to turn
transparent after you get wet and,
well, who wants to make their clothes
look as if they just got washed in
mud?
Go for brighter hues like reds and
blues. They go perfectly well with the
weather. Lift the thunder clouds and
add a hint of colourful accessories.
Footwear
Replace your leather sandals with
rubber slippers , sandals or floaters.
They don’t soak water well and why in
Dress up
during
Monsoon
Six tips. By Mansi Mahendru
this world would you want to spoil Bottoms
your expensive leather footwear in Wear skirts or shorts as long
puddles? trousers can get dirty your way. Skirts
are easy to wear whereas jeans get
Carry an umbrella or rain coat
Don’t forget to carry an
umbrella or rain coat before
stepping out of your home.
Match your umbrella with your
attire to give a uniform look. An
umbrella is like a saviour during
monsoon.
Make-up and hairstyle
Use minimal make-up and make
sure you don’t cake your face. Try
using waterproof and smudge-free
products as even a few drop of rain
can ruin your hard work.
Your hair gets frizzy and dry, so tie
it in different ponytails and buns.
Indian wear
If you prefer India wear then ditch muddied due to the splash-back from
your salwars and patialas and replace puddles. We
them with churidaars. Prefer short
kurtis over floor-length long kurtis.
They are more easy and comfortable
Ambition breaks the ties of blood,
to carry. Cotton and polyster are and forgets the obligations of
perfect for monsoon. gratitude.
I know all about facial beauty masks but recently, a friend told
me that the secret of her silky hair was a “hair mask”. I am
totally intrigued. What is a hair mask?
Indeed, nowadays we have several types of hair masks to
improve the texture of our hair. You can buy commercial
packs in the market and use them, or you can easily make
home-made ones too.
The procedure to use these is simple. First wash and towel-
dry your hair very well. Then take small portions of the mask
which usually is in the form of a thick cream or lotion, and
apply it carefully, strand by strand, on your hair, till you cover
the whole length of it. Let it dry completely. Then wash off
with warm water. Do not shampoo or condition after this.
You can make the following hair masks at home.
Mash 2 very ripe bananas with 2 tbsp of olive oil and 1 tbsp
of honey. Mix well till no lumps remain.
Whisk 2 eggs with 2 tbsp of olive oil or coconut oil. Use.
Mash an avocado and mix with a little milk and olive oil.
My fingers have hair growing on them! Please tell me what is
the best way of removing this, so that I can wear rings. Now, I
hate drawing attention to my hands.
Hair on the fingers could be a genetic issue. It runs in the
family, perhaps? If the growth is very thick, and even your
arms and legs are hairy, hormonal imbalance could be the
cause, although this is not common.
Shaving is the easiest way of removing hair from fingers.
If the hairs are few, tweeze them away. This could be
painful though.
Waxing is not a pleasant
experience but it gives longer
lasting results.
Electrolysis presents a
permanent solution; it will need
many sittings and could be
expensive.
Use an epilator which is easy to use and does not cause
discomfort.
Depilatory creams contain chemicals which dissolve hair at
skin level.
Rub a paste of gramflour mixed with milk and turmeric on
the fingers. Let dry. Rub firmly. Wash off. This discourages
hair growth if done regularly.
My friend and I are planning a holiday in Ladakh and Leh.
Please let me know if we need any special cosmetics to keep
our skin looking good, or will our normal ones do well enough?
You will indeed need some good creams and lotions to
keep yourself from harming your skin. Your usual ones will
not do. Due to the high altitude the sun rays are very strong
and the UV rays can wreak havoc on your exposed body
parts.Get a very good sun block lotion or cream. The latter is
preferable as it is thicker with SPF of 50. Apply this liberally on
your face, arms and even legs to avoid painful sunburn.
Carry a calamine lotion to soothe any irritated skin patches
if these do appear.
Use a thick lip balm as lips turn to blister and cut due to the
cold.
18 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
Wear polaroid sun glasses as the reflection of the snow
can damage the eyes.
Cover your head with a scarf not just to keep warm but to
avoid drying of hair in the chilly atmosphere.
Thick socks and gloves will keep your extremities safe from
chapping and frostbite. Massage in a thick emollient cream at
night.
Drink a lot of water to keep dehydration at bay.
I have to do a lot of air travel in course of my work. My
problem is I always have a dry, flaky face when I get off the
flight and rush off to my meeting. Please tell me how to deal
with this.
It is quite apparent that you have dry skin, and the air-
conditioned aircraft cabin air does not help your cause in any
way. Follow the simple tricks to look as fresh as a daisy when
you arrive at your meeting.
Drink a lot of water on the flight. Aerated drinks should
be avoided.
Carry wet wipes and primer, foundation and a good
moisturiser in a small vanity case which should also contain
lipstick and eyeliner. When it is time to land, wipe face
thoroughly with the wipes. Then apply a primer lightly. Before
using light foundation brighten your eyes with an eyeliner,
and apply lipstick. You will look great.
If you do not want to use foundation, simply apply a
Q
moisturiser which will keep your face glowing.
A
&
Beauty
Queries
I am 24 years old and
already have some strands of grey
hair. This is a hereditary trait, for all the
women in our family are prematurely grey. I want to
know whether I should start using colour on my hair now itself
to hide the aberrant hairs or wait till I become more grey.
Please advise. Is it safe to use dyes?
When only a few hairs are grey, it is definitely not advisable
to use dye. It is unnecessary at this stage. You can use a hair-
colouring stick to colour only the grey hairs, if you wish,
although these may be unnoticeable for everyone but you!
At a pinch you can even use a kajol stick.
For a more lasting camouflage use henna. This natural
concoction made of henna leaves, tea and egg is an excellent
hair tinter. You can use it for the whole scalp without any
qualms; in fact, it makes the hair smooth and glossy.
When you turn considerably greyer, consult a beauty
expert which colour suits your scalp condition. There are
separate ones for dry and oily scalps, and even non-allergic.
Use a good brand and always do the first session
professionally so that you learn the technique. Follow all
instructions with care.
 THE PUFF OF
Ca s u a l R e l a t i o n s h i p s
Todayʼs friends with benefits. By Saumya Shresth

G
iving a back seat to old school
love stories, friends with
benefits is topping all the
charts. There is no denying the fact
that everyone desires having this
arrangement once in life. Roles,
careers and opportunities have
changed over time and there are now
huge options for individuals that
didn't exist before. This sees younger
people tending to have more long-
term goals that they prioritise over
serious relationships. What stops us
from putting a foot forward in this
direction is the phenomenon of being
judged by others and the uncertainty
of falling into a vicious circle. Where
the western countries are quite at
peace with the friends-with-benefits
culture, it is still a big deal for the
Indian society. Still, breaking some
norms, the younger generations are
taking a step forward and prioritising
their sexual desires over commitment
and rocking the casual relationship
phenomenon.

20 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017

 Let’s look forward to some tips on
how one can maintain a healthy casual
bond in this Indian society
Maintain privacy
Indian society is still following
some old standards which are
technically not applicable in today’s
era. Keeping your relationship low key
will help you live peacefully. There is
nothing to be ashamed of about a
friends-with benefits relationship,
every one has some physical needs
which they want to satisfy without
being emotionally attached. Privacy
does not mean you are hiding it
because you are wrong. It’s just
keeping it to yourself so that you are
not judged by others. Sometimes
comments from others disturb your
mental peace, and hence keeping it
private can help a lot.
The person should be
trustworthy
Every relationship starts with
trust and there is no difference
in this case too. Both the
partners in friends-with-
benefits must be able to
trust each other properly.
This sort of relationship is
more sensitive than others
and is most of the time kept
confidential due to it being
controversial. Someone you
can trust with your intimacy
makes it easier and smooth
for you to handle this
arrangement and you can
live with relief rather than
being worried all the time.
Avoid it with a friend
Friends-with-benefits
with a close friend is a big
no in the very first place.
More often than not, this
kind of arrangement ends in a
year. These are not long-term
commitments. With friends you
can end up in an embarrassing
situation making your friendship
sour forever. And it is not
necessary you end up on a
healthy note. So, being a part of
the same friend circle will make
you bump into them again and
INDIAN SOCIETY IS STILL again which will be quite excruciating
for both of you.
FOLLOWING SOME OLD
STANDARDS WHICH ARE Do not fall in love
TECHNICALLY NOT with your partner
Sometimes it is said that one of the
APPLICABLE IN TODAY’S two partners develops feelings for the
ERA. KEEPING YOUR second one making it an emotional
affair. Friends with benefits is meant
RELATIONSHIP LOW KEY to end one day and hence save
WILL HELP YOU LIVE yourself from being attached to that
PEACEFULLY. THERE IS person because he or she might not
be looking for something serious
NOTHING TO BE which will make you feel miserable at
ASHAMED OF ABOUT A the end. So, it’s better to distance
yourself from them as soon as you
FRIENDS-WITH BENEFITS attain feelings for them because at
RELATIONSHIP. one point of time you might just feel
vulnerable.
Avoid sharing personal details
When it is just about your sexual
pleasure you should not discuss about
your family and personal issues. One
thing leads to another and either
you end up falling for that
person or hating that
person completely.
Personal issues
should be
talked about at
minimal level and
sexuality must be
explored,
without seeing
it with a
negative
perspective one must look
forward to developing
physically.
Casual relations are not that
bad if they are dealt with a mature
manner, everyone has the right to
lead a life the way they want to.
Physical intimacy is a part and parcel
of life and when you cannot find
someone who matches your
wavelength for a serious relationship
or your ideal partner, friends with
benefits can always be an option,
though escaping commitments in the
cover of casual relationship is a wrong
idea. We
Keep love in your heart. A life
without it is like a sunless garden
when the flowers are dead.
 OH-BOY!
A
ctive and satisfying sex life is a
must for a blissful marriage.
After all, it is a basic human
need that needs to be satiated timely
to avoid becoming sexually frustrated
and distressed.
Both husband and wife expect to
have consensual hot and steamy sex
sessions which not only fulfill their
desire for sex but also help them stay
in an indispensable emotional bond. It
is the only thing that spouses uniquely
share with each other and don't share
with anyone else. The very fact that it
requires a deeper level of
communication makes it even more
special because during intimacy, you
need to tell your partner about your
position preferences or where you
like to be touched. To reach and
sustain this intimate level of
communication is indeed a very
special feeling for both, husband and
wife. Especially for women, who use it
to express their love and appreciation
towards their husband. Most of you
would agree that sex not only helps to
make you feel connected to your
partner but also energizes you and
help you stay vibrant and happy.
While men are very much open
about their cravings for sex, women
too secretly desire their hubbies to
satisfy them in bed. But what if your
husband's below the average
22
performance is constantly pissing you
off? Well, nothing can be a bigger
turn-off for a wife than an
unsatisfying husband, who is either
suffering from erectile dysfunction or
has a poor performance in bed.
If you are also one such distressed
woman or a man who is unable to
keep your lady love happy with
intense physical intimacy, your all
problems are gonna vanish and you
will soon be able to enjoy an amazing
sex life with your spouse!
There indeed are a plethora of
products available in the market that
claim to treat sexual dysfunctions
with unrealistic results but
unfortunately are just another bait set
to trap the hopeless and distraught
people. But worry not! Here we bring
to you an ultimate cure for male
sexual dysfunctions that too from
ORGANIC INDIA, India's leading herbal
and ayurvedic products company.
Known for its super effective natural
health supplements, ORGANIC INDIA
has a sure shot solution to enhance
male sexual performance as well i.e.
Oh-Boy capsules.
Made with certified organic herbs
like Krishna Musli, Shwet Musli,
Ashwagandha, Brahmi and Keshar.
Oh-Boy naturally improves male
sexual performance, strength and
reproductive functions. Right from
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
impotency to sperm production, Oh-
Boy works on all of them. Have a look
at its astonishing yet realistic benefits.
✿ Oh-Boy reduces erectile
dysfunction.
✿ It's 3-V formula enhances a man's
vigour, virility and vitality.
✿ It's use can boost up the sperm
count.
✿ Oh-Boy also reduces impotency.
✿ Oh-Boy improves libido and instills
an increased desire to have sex.
Each capsule of Oh-Boy is a
miraculous natural formulation of
incredible herbs namely Krishna Musli,
Ashwagandha, Shwet Musli, Brahmi
and Kesar.
Krishna Musli, a perennial shrub
increases potency and is highly
effective for sexual weakness of
males. It shows significant results on
libido loss and also boosts confidence
to perform.
Ashwagandha, fondly known as a
miraculous herb is a key ingredient in
Oh-Boy capsules. It evidently
increases sperm count and volume of
semen. It boosts testosterones and
increases fertility in men. It also acts
as a great stress reliever.
Shwet Musli, yet another perennial
shrub improves semen production.
Brahmi, also known as brain
booster stimulates sexual desires and
also improves performance ability.
Last but not the least, kesar
contains picrocrocin, a stimulant
which reduces fatigue and reduces
erotic sensations.
2 capsules of Oh-Boy twice a day is
all you need for a high-power
satisfying sex life!
That's not it! It's benefits are not
confined to only bedroom. Oh-Boy
also relieves stress, boosts immunity
and promotes mental clarity. One
experiences a renewed sense of
purpose with the confidence, health
and stamina which further helps to
improve life's quality in many ways. We
 5 a s h i o
F Tip e r s
Su m m
s f
no r
Be trendy and stylish.
O
h, “You look pretty today!” "You're looking
stunning!” Such compliments make you feel
pleasant when you hear them from people
around you. The word fashion is defined as the latest
style that is in trend, the way you carry yourself, the
way you dress, etc. given below are some fashion
tips for women which will not make you feel like a
sweaty disaster this summer.
Cover up to protect your skin from the sun and
stay cool: In these hot summers, it is very important
to protect your skin from the sun rays. One of the
best ways to do this is by covering your beautiful
face by a scarf or anything else whenever you move
out into the sun. It helps you sweat less and stay
cool.
Stick to light colours: It is a universal fact that
dark colours absorb heat easily, make you feel warm
and you start sweating. So, it is better to wear light
colours to protect yourself from the stinky summers.
This helps you stay cool and comfortable.
24 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
By Ananya Tondon
Wear as few ornaments as possible: The more
ornaments you put on, the more you feel
uncomfortable. Heavy metals get heated quickly.
Earrings are okay to put up but necklaces, bracelets,
etc, can make you look unmanaged and
sweaty.
Keep your clothes loose: Wearing loose clothes
makes you feel quite comfortable. Tight clothes at
some point of time, irritate you. Loose clothes can
be handled easily as compared to tight clothes.
Loose clothes make you feel free and prevent you
from much sweating.
Take a nice, hot shower to increase your body
temperature: 'Hot shower in summers'. I know it is
very unpleasant to hear. But yes, it is true. A nice,
hot shower in summers increases your body
temperature and matches your body temperature
with your surrounding temperature. Taking a nice,
cool shower easily makes you sweat before you step
out of your house. We
The good life is one inspired by love and guided
by knowledge.
Sthoorryt
S
Silence
Waiting to explode. By Kishni K. Pandita
A
re you going to
answer back
again?” Mohan
shouted giving her a
mighty whack on her back.
“I didn’t say anything
that has made you angry,”
she said dodging the next
blow.”
“Your tongue is
becoming longer and
longer. I will have to do
What do you something about it. I
haven’t given you the
have? Nothing, permission to answer
absolutely back.”
nothing, what “Then you should not
ask the questions.”
are you? A zero, “Again! I am cursing the
a big zero. No day I married you. Your
looks, no father had made a lot of
complexion,
nothing but a
promises. All that vanished
in thin air. He has name,
fame and what did he give
long tongue,” he me? All the good stuff has
said glaring at been taken by your sister. I
ended up getting this
her. bundle of nuisance. What
do you have? Nothing,
absolutely nothing, what
are you? A zero, a big zero.
No looks, no complexion,
nothing but a long tongue,”
he said glaring at her.
”Why do you always say
that? Everything given to
us was the same. Sunita
and I got the same share. I
don’t think her husband
complains. Then why do
you?”
“Why would he? Do you
think I don’t know what all
he got in addition to a
beautiful wife? With these
looks nobody would have
married you.”
“Then why did you?
Nobody had forced you.
You had accepted the
proposal.”
“How dare you question
me?” he glared at her and
hit her with such force that
she felt her jaw had broken.
“Keep sitting in that corner.
This is where your place is
and what you deserve,” he
said locking the door from
outside.
She sat cowered in a
corner. Her jaw was
throbbing. This had not
been the first time. It had
“How
dare you
question me?” he
glared at her and hit her
with such force that she felt
her jaw had broken. “Keep
sitting in that corner. This
is where your place is
and what you
deserve.”
become a daily affair.
Almost every evening he
would come, his face red
with rage and would take
out his anger on her. She
had become a punching
bag. ‘Why is this happening
to me? I should be cursing
the day and not him. He
treats me like dirt I am not
allowed to talk to my
parents. If they call up, I
have to pretend to be
blissfully happy. He locks
the phone and me too. I am
a prisoner. My parents
must be happy that I am
enjoying my married life,
but they have no idea what
I am going through.’
S he was still reeling from
the impact of the slap
he had given her and no
idea how long she had been
sitting there. Her limbs felt
stiff. But she decided that
enough was enough and
made an effort to get up.
With great difficulty she
managed to reach near the
window. Several times she
had stood near the window
to see if she could spot
someone who happened to
pass by. But the street
seemed to be a dead one
which remained deserted
most of the time. But,
perhaps today was her
lucky day and for once her
prayer was answered. He
was a young man at some
distance. She summoned
up her full strength to call
him and beckoned him.
T he young man was
surprised to see a
shabby- looking young
woman whose one side of
the tear-stained face was
swollen. She was crying.
“Please help me.
I don’t have much time. My
husband may come any
time.” From the corner of
her sari she took out a small
piece of paper and handed
it to him. “This is the phone
number of my parents.
Please tell them whatever
you have seen. Will you do
it?” she pleaded. “Please
tell them to hurry,
otherwise it will be too late.
I am a prisoner here and
can neither go out nor talk
to anyone.” She folded her
hands.
The young man had
been taken aback. It didn’t
take him much time to
understand the seriousness
of the situation. “Yes, sure I
will call them just now. May
I know your name?”
“I am Anita.”
“Don’t worry Anitaji.
They will come very soon. I
will tell them all that I have
seen. He smiled at her.
Next morning when
Anita’s parents came, they
were shocked to see her.
She looked weak, starved
and was wearing a shabby
sari. Her father couldn’t
control his anger. He
shouted at Mohan, “Is this
how wives are treated in
your family? You are a
brute, an animal. In which
century are you living? I
tried my best to do
everything that would
make my daughter happy.
But my bad luck is that I
couldn’t buy her happiness.
I would like to ask my
friend, the one who came
with your proposal, why he
did this to me and to my
daughter. I had not harmed
him in any way, then why
did he ruin my daughter’s
life and our peace of mind?
I know my daughter is not
an apsara but she has a
heart of gold. It is your bad
luck that you did not
appreciate what she had;
her talent, her dignity, her
simplicity and, above all,
her adorable nature.
A nita was crying in her
mother’s arms. “Please
take me with you. I feel
suffocated here. I don’t
want to live here any
more,” she said.
”Yes, of course you are
coming with us. I don’t care
what people will say. I have
given education and good
sanskars to both of you,
which have made you good
and compassionate human
beings,” her father said.
Then he turned to Mohan
and said, “One day, you will
regret but it will be too late.
She will not come back.”
“It is perfectly all right.
You can take her. I have no
objection. As for regret you
don’t worry about that. I
Her father, no
doubt was in a high
post but he was a
man of integrity
and impeccable
honesty. The kind
of reputation he
had, nobody would
have dared to
offer him any kind
of bribe.
won’t miss her,” Mohan
said sheepishly.
“You disgust me. I don’t
know what I saw in you.
Now, I know that coming
from a good family and
being educated does not
necessarily mean that you
will have inherited
something good from
them. I am ashamed that in
spite of my experience and
wisdom”I failed to know
the true you. These good
looks and charm are only a
facade. Behind this mask is
a sadist who is incapable of
seeing any good.”
Anita had always known
that she was not good-
looking and had a dark
complexion. But she had
never been made conscious
Anita
was crying in her
mother’s arms. “Please
take me with you. I feel
suffocated here. I don’t want
to live here any more,” she
said.
”Yes, of course you are
coming with us. I don’t
care what people will
say.
of her looks by anyone in
her family. Her younger
sister was beautiful but
there had never been any
discrimination on the basis
of that. Her father was a
progressive man who
believed neither in gender
bias nor in beauty, which he
thought was only skin-
deep. He believed in inner
beauty and the qualities
which make a person a
good human being and
according to him Anita had
plenty of those qualities.
I t was after a couple of
rejections from the
prospective grooms
because of her complexion
and average looks that she
became conscious of her
shortcomings. But she
believed that there would
be someone somewhere
who would accept her as
she was. She had been
unhappy not because of her
rejections but because of
her parents who had
started getting worried. It
had hurt her. Then she had
realised that her marriage
would be a deal where her
father will have to pay
money to compensate for
her plain looks.
When her marriage with
Mohan was settled he had
neither made any demands
nor had objected to her
plain looks. At that time
she had thought that her
belief in herself was not
misfounded. Her family had
been delighted. She had
been grateful to him not
only because he had agreed
to marry her but for saving
her and her family from
humiliation by not asking
them for anything. That
time he had come as a
messiah, a knight in a
shining armour to save her.
Little did she know that he
was no messiah but a
sadist, an inhuman being
who knew only how to
torture.
Now, she wondered
what promises had the
mediator made to him. Her
father, no doubt was in a
high post but he was a man
of integrity and impeccable
honesty. The kind of
reputation he had, nobody
would have dared to offer
him any kind of bribe. She
had no idea what
expectations he had from
her father. Every time there
was argument he would say
that her father had not
given him enough.
I t was her father who had
encouraged her to take
part in debates, essay
writing and other activities
and she had won several
prizes, which had helped
her in building up her
confidence. But after her
marriage not only had her
dreams of a happily
married life been shattered
but her confidence and self-
esteem had been swept
away by the tides of abuses
and caustic comments on
her looks. She had been
actually reduced to a zero.
Sometime she would get so
disgusted with herself that “I am sorry but I read a few pages
she refused to look at of your diary. I can’t believe that
you have written all this. It is so
herself in the mirror. She well written and so explosive. If it
had been reduced to a
mental wreck.
Now that she had come
back to her parents’ place,
they had got to know that
Mohan had a drinking
problem and was always
short of money. The few
months which Anita had
spent with him had taken
their toll on her. She had
changed completely. That
carefree, ever-smiling girl
had been replaced by a
terrified girl who would
shudder and shiver at the
sound of the doorbell and
cringe when the phone
rang.
She became a recluse,
who found it difficult to
face people, tried hard to
avoid strangers and lived in
her own world fighting the
ghosts of her turbulent past
and the nightmares she had
gone through. Her parents
and her younger sister, who
had come to stay with her
for the time being, tried
their best to help her to
come out of her shock.
They did not pressurise her
in any way and made sure
nobody reminded her past.
“Didi
I wanted to talk to
you,” Rupa said a little
hesitantly.
“Yes, of course,” she said.
gets published it will be like
stirring the hornet’s nest.
You know that we own a
publishing house.
They were hopeful that
slowly the things would
change and she would get
over her tragic past.
Anita would stare
endlessly at nothing. She
always carried a notebook
with her. She would
occasionately write in it.
Her family wondered what
she wrote in that. She
never talked about it. Her
relatives had wanted her
father to lodge a complaint
against Mohan. But her
father was not keen about
it. “I don’t want her to
suffer again. She had
enough. He is the kind of
person who can stoop to
any level. Now that her
wounds are healing, I don’t
want to open them again.
And to tell you the truth I
don’t want to see that
scoundrel again,” her father
said.
I t was through their
unrelenting effort, their
gentle and tender approach
that she started coming out
of her shell. The pages of
her notebook kept on filling
up. She and her notebook
were inseparable. The
content of the notebook
came to light when the
younger sister Sunita’s
friend Rupa came to their
place. Anita offered to
make tea for them.
“Whose notebook is
this?” Rupa said turning the
pages. She was spellbound.
“My, goodness! Who has
written this?” she asked.
Sunita was surprised. “This
is didi’s. Where did you find
it? She never leaves it like
this.”
“I am telling you, Sunita,
this is fantastic stuff.
Whatever she has written is
a cry from the depths of a
tortured soul. I want this to
be published. I will talk to
papa.”
Sunita was scared, “I
don’t know how didi is
going to react. This is
something very private.
You know what she has
gone through. Even we
have never tried to find out
what she has written in it.”
“Let me talk to didi.”
When Anita came with the
tea tray she quickly picked
up her notebook.
“Didi I wanted to talk to
you,” Rupa said a little
hesitantly.
“Yes, of course,” she
said.
“I am sorry but I read a
few pages of your diary. I
can’t believe that you have
written all this. It is so well
written and so explosive. If
it gets published it will be
like stirring the hornet’s
nest. You know that we
own a publishing house.
Nowadays I am helping my
father and
I have a fairly good idea
what sells,” she looked
expectantly at Anita.
“Rupa, all this was not
written with the intention
of publishing. Nobody
knows what I went through.
It was a nightmare, an
unending nightmare which
has shaken me so badly
that I will need one more
life to forget it.
I was brutalised, I was
rebuked, I was beaten up,
starved, tortured mentally
and physically. Not only I,
but my family too,
especially my father, was
abused. All that I carried
with me. It sat on my chest
so heavily that it hurt me
and I found it difficult to
breathe. That smouldering
lava had come out. I
wanted to unburden
myself. But I didn’t know
whom to talk to.
My family never raised
this topic because they
didn’t want me to suffer
again. They thought it
would be best if everything
was left unsaid. Time is a
great healer and with the
passage of time I will get
over it. Also I didn’t want to
tell them because they
were already disturbed and
worried about me. But I
wanted to talk about it and
throw it out. It was then
that I decided to write
down the whole thing.
“This dairy has been my
constant companion. Now I
feel much better and
lighter. It worked like
catharsis. It was also not
written with the intention
of making money. This
dairy has become a part of
my anatomy, my
confidante, my best friend.
You don’t sell your best
friend. I don’t know how I
left it today.”
“It was a great accident,
that’s why,” Rupa said.
“Listen, Rupa, nobody
reads this kind of stuff
anymore. You will be
wasting your money,”
Anita said.
“Leave that to me. I
have been with papa for
quite some time and have
gained a little bit of
experience. I can assure you
that this book will sell like
hot cakes. Let’s have a
deal. If the book sells it is
yours and if not, then it is
mine. Let the whole world
know what hypocrites we
are?
How hollow our society
perfect arc. ‘How beautiful! Keep
is, which pretends to be
liberal and modern. How
much exploitations is still
there? It is still a male-
dominated society. A man
can do anything and get
away with it. In spite of the
tall claim made by our
society, there hasn’t been
much change in the status
of woman. After marriage if
the husband leaves her for
whatever reason, there is
no future as her. There may
be a few exceptions but the
vast majority still suffers. A
man can have as many
flings as he wants, can go
anywhere to please himself
but a woman is not allowed
even to look at somebody
else. Why these double
standards? Just give me the
permission,” Rupa said.
“I will think over it. Give
me some time,” Anita said.
I t was her father who
persuaded her. “Anita,
this is an opportunity to
expose not only him but all
those chauvinists who still
believe that they are
superior to females just
because they are males. In
what way are they superior,
I don’t know. I don’t know
what is going on in your
mind. You still seem to be
She
got up and went
near the window. A few
moments passed. She kept
on staring out of the window.
She looked up. A flight of birds
was soaring up in the sky in a
flying freely. Don’t let anyone
put you down. Don’t let
anyone clip your wings,
she mouthed
silently.
It was a great
success, a number
one bestseller.
Everybody seemed to
be talking about this
book. There had
been rave reviews in
the magazines. It
was appreciated by
masses and they
wanted to see the
face hiding behind it.
in two minds. Do you still
have any hope about
Mohan? Do you think he
has any remorse and will
come back to you?” he
asked.
“No papa. I don’t think
he will have any such
feelings. In any case I have
no intention of going back
to him,” she said.
“Then allow Rupa to
publish it.”
Rupa’s prediction
actually came true. The
book was a sensation. After
a long time a book had
came in the market which
had come from the depths
of somebody’s heart. It was
a great success, a number
one bestseller. Everybody
seemed to be talking about
this book. There had been
rave reviews in the
magazines. It was
appreciated by masses and
they wanted to see the face
hiding behind it. Anita had
become famous. Her family
seemed to be on cloud
nine.
“It is time you came out
form your hiding place. You
have proved that beauty is
not everything,“ her father
advised her. She was
interviewed by magazines.
People came to meet her,
talk to her and know more
about her. Slowly, a
confident-looking woman
emerged from that
frightened, quiet and
reclusive girl who had been
reluctant to meet
strangers. Now she was not
afraid to show her face, the
face for which she had been
abused, mocked at and
tortured.
One day, she was alone
at home. The servant came
to tell her that someone
wanted to meet her. “Send
him in.“ She thought that it
would be someone to
interview her or someone
who wanted to know more
about her latest book.
M ohan was standing at
the door, “I have been
thinking of coming to see
you, but didn’t have the
courage to face you. I know
how bad I have been and
how I have tortured you.
I didn’t appreciate anything
about you. I am a sinner.
I don’t think I have the right
to ask for forgiveness but
please do forgive me. I beg
to you. After all, we are still
husband and wife. Such
things keep on happening
in this relationship. Isn’t it
possible for us to start anew?
Anita kept on listening
to him quietly. She got up
and went near the window.
A few moments passed.
She kept on staring out of
the window. She looked up.
A flight of birds was soaring
up in the sky in a perfect
arc. ‘How beautiful! Keep
flying freely. Don’t let
anyone put you down.
Don’t let anyone clip your
wings, she mouthed
silently. Then she heard the
sound of receding feet. She
turned back. He had gone.
Her silence had said it all. We
We are made wise not by
the recollection of our past,
but by the responsibility for
our future.
EVERYDAY,
A GOOD HAIR DAY
Styles to nail this season. By Garima Beri

A
long with frequent mizzles and
velvety breeze, monsoon Go whatever! Ponytails
brings an ardour with it. Go wavy!
No girl is ever
Styling up yourself is a must to look as In such getting over
this super easy
pleasing as the weather outside. weather, where and convenie
way of styling, nt
Playing and experimenting with hair is your hair would a ponytail!
a lady’s first love. anyhow end up
If you want
No need to go an extra mile for like something you did not to follow a
that perfect look, this monsoon gives want, it is safe to sometimes go sleek and
you a chance to chill out by being wavy and simple with your hair. pretty look,
simple and stylish! Natural waves are no less than a you can try
blessing to a few girls but others looks other
too can get them easily with a than high
Top knot curler. ponytails too.
The most You can also have natural ✿ Pontytai
d ls
followed tren waves or curls at home. All you on the neck
ye ar is th e need to do is tie your hair into a
of the region, added
kn ot . Th e braid and keep it tight overnight. up by braiding
top the crown area in
is .
versatility of th Next morning unbraid your hair ✿ Tie a side
is into beautiful waves without ponytail along
hair-do an accessory with
it on the opposi
unparalleled as even damaging your hair! side. te
ra ig ht
is a yes for st ✿ Try curli
y ha ir, ng your hair an
hair, wav ed your hair up in d tie
d even damag a ponytail.
bouncy hair an is ju st ✿ A beau
long hair, it tiful accessor
hair! Short or ba nd ! H ol d simple ponyta y on a
rubber il can do wonde
a matter of a tie a po ny ta il, rs.
ht ,
your hair up tig ur
tail round yo
take the pony .
nd an d there you go
rubber ba pe d ‘m es sy
e hy
Not missing th p
n’ a fa m ily member of to
bu do n’ t
hing you
knots is somet ju st
try, it
even have to e so
en s. St yl ing has becom Braid yourself up
happ ha ve
e ready to
easy with thes In such wet weather, women
s, go in g well with
hot look avoid keeping open hair and
hing!
almost everyt rather prefer a tied and a neat
goes
This hairs le ty l look that makes the hair look
ly w ith formals as wel
effortless di an as w ell pretty and in order. Joy of short hair!
with In
as informals, There are numerous ways of The short-hair trend is
as Western!
tying your hair into braids. Try conquering the minds of women
out the French braid or a Dutch these days. The hot avatars of the
braid or a fishtail one. These ladies in pixie cut or the bob cut
coiffures compensate for are unfolding rapidly.
everything and anything lacking This season gave women full
in your look. Even simple sober freedom to play around with their
clothing can be spiced up by hairstyles and yet look gorgeous
braiding your hair up. in whatever they carry. We

P
ura Vida in Spanish means “Pure
Life” and this is the law of the
land in Costa Rica and is an
expression that is used in many forms
from a greeting to a synonym for
“excellent”. Life is wonderful and
enjoy it. “The world is going through a
lot of havoc in the Kali Yuga and as
long as we remain connected to
whom we are and know where we are
going and why we will help balance
the chaos. Yoga is one of the many
options to do this. Yoga is not a
religion but a science and art and it
can benefit all humanity, says
Ambassador of the Republic of Costa
Rica, Mariela Cruz Alvarez.
A SCIENCE –
NOT A RELIGION
Ambassador of the Republic of
Costa Rica to India, Mariela Cruz Alvarez
practising Yoga. By Rashmi Bhargava
Excerpts from a interview:
Would you please tell us about your
upbringing and schooling ?
I was born and raised in Costa Rica
and my initial upbringing was done in
this beautiful surrounding. My parents
are very dedicated and caring people,
so i received the best education. I
went to a private bilingual school and
started to practise piano and ballet at
5, thanks to my mother. Then i
graduated in my Law degree and then
had three masters degree in Law: one
in Commercial Law, one in family law
in Italy, and the last one in
Environmental Law.
I got married at 21 and at 25 years I
already had my first two children:
Hernan and Adriana. Never
anticipated I would eventually be the
happy mother of 7 amazing human
beings: 6 boys and one girl. I practised
yoga a little bit on my own while
pregnant mainly because there was
no such a thing as a yoga studio or
prenatal yoga in San José. Found Yoga
at a gym, all shattered after a very
difficult marriage with four small
children and a painful divorce.
At that crucial time yoga changed
my life. All blessings come from this
amazing transformational practice.
What are the main reasons which
turned you towards reading religious
books and your main source of
inspiration. Tell us about your journey.
Since very small i used to have a
natural inclination towards spirituality
that goes on until now. My favourite
story books were Joan of Arch and
Lourdes' Little Shepherds. My mother
started practising yoga when I was 8
years old. She used to take me to her
class and while she practised i played
in the backyard. There was a
Rosicrucian temple in there and I
would see white and bright figures
walking around. Eventually, also
started practising. Back then there
were almost no places where to learn
yoga in Costa Rica.
I found the practice of Ashtanga in
Costa Rica in 2002 through a teacher
from Ohio. Both the strength and
softness in her practice impressed me.
I started teaching and then came to
India and fell in love with this country.
Ashtanga gave me back the vitality
and energy I had lost. My teachers
taught me the art of calming my mind
through my body.
This practice is a dance for me.
Yoga is a technology to cultivate the
joy of living and an art to discover the
inherent harmony of our Self at all
times.
What is your opinion about the
people from India who come to Costa
Rica ?
Costa Rica has an Indian
population of 200 in 5 million people.
But these 200 people have engaged a
larger population of Costa Ricans to
be looking at India with high esteem
for cultural, technological and
economic reasons. Costa Rica is
known as a jewel in Central America
region for its natural beauty, peace
and economical stability which have
also led to expansion of seekers of
healthy lifestyle. The Indian friends
that I know are hard-working people,
dedicated and lovers of my country. I
feel positive more visitors from India
will appreciate very much our
hospitality and great outdoors.
“The world is going through a lot
of havoc in the Kali Yuga and as long
as we remain connected to whom we
are and know where we are going and
why we will help balance the chaos."
Yes, all the answers are
inside of our souls. I feel
happy because I have
travelled extensively
teaching my art in America,
Europe and Asia. Many of my
students have been to our
yoga school in Mysore,
Karnataka, not only from
Costa Rica but also from
many other countries in Latin
America.
I have been the Yoga
Ambassador for the past 15
years and I have had the
great privilege to represent a
serious lineage and
Parampara from my teachers.
Any other issue you would
like to speak about ?
India and Costa Rica enjoy friendly
and cordial relations. The Third Round
of Political Consultations will take
place next November 2017 in San José
and we are looking forward to that. A
lot of possibilities will open from this
event.
As you said that in your personal
life you were having crisis ,so how you
overcame those?
In my personal life i´ve had many
crises and I know I have come out
stronger and wiser from each one of
them. It is through deep crisis that we
learn to love deeply. That we
appreciate from the bottom of our
hearts, human mixture of light and
darkness. It is through the crisis that
we find our connection is the only
place to turn to and understand this
paradox. When everything gets dark
outside we have the perfect
opportunity to go within and
integrate.
This crisis is the best thing that
could happen to all the spiritual
searchers. Now, we need to get
serious and ask ourselves if our
actions are matching our beliefs.
Because there is definitely an external
force that doesn´t want us to thrive,
that wants to kill every drop of faith
and love and it´s ready to strike.
I just had a major health crisis here
in Delhi. It was very hard for me to be
away from my family, in hospital. But I
also found the best medical care, the
most loving friends. Crisis brings a lot
of havoc but also a lot of
transformation.
“Only through our awareness our
children will survive.” You said this so
kindly explain this .
I think of my grandchild. What kind
of world is he going to inherit? What
can I do to create space for his
dreams? How can I be more loyal to
mine, less attached to outcomes and
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
just give it all despite the risk? Love is
the only answer. We will never give
up. I will never give up, that is my
promise to my beautiful Azul.
Dark times require furious, intense
and absolute commitment. Those of
us who are convinced there is no
other way: we are ready to love more.
All the way and never ever get tired.
No matter how hard, no matter how
many sacrifices we will encounter.
Love requires unlimited faith and
hope is our only salvation right now.
What is your message to the people
of India and what is the future
prospects of these two countries India
and Costa Rica.
My message to the people of India
is very simple: whatever are your
circumstances stick with your spiritual
values as they will give you inner
strength, no matter what. You have a
great example of sadhana and
commitment in your PM Mr Modi.
Our friendship as countries could
bring a lot of opportunities, blending
proactive diplomacy, address issues
like enhancing connectivity and
leverage win-win opportunities,
especially in areas like agriculture,
nutritional processing, textiles,
transport and energy, not to mention
IT. But this is secondary compared to
all the human growth we can do
together, sharing our common values
for democracy, freedom, respect
towards all sentient beings. We
Beauty is when you can appreciate
yourself. When you love yourself,
that's when you're most beautiful.
33
My sister was recently widowed at the age of 40. Her husband
died in a road accident and now the insurance company is
refusing to pay her the insurance money she is entitled to, on
the grounds that the accident that killed my brother-in-law
was caused by his own carelessness.
This refusal by the insurance company has come as a shock
to the whole family. My sister will certainly fight the insurance
company’s decision in court, but the immediate problem is
how she will support herself till she wins the case and the
court orders the company to pay her.
It then occurred to my sister that she could complete a
course that she had given up half-way when her marriage had
been settled by our parents. She had topped the first year
exams in the course. So now, she decided to go to the institute
where she had been doing the course and ask if she could
complete it.
My whole family felt that this was a good idea and I went
with her to the institute. To our surprise, the people at the
institute remembered her as one of their topper students and
at once agreed to take her back to complete the second half of
the course.
But my sister told me that she did not feel confident that
she could complete the course in one year. After all, she said,
she had been out of touch with studies for more than 12 years
and she also had two children to take care of. I immediately
told her that our whole family would help her and that I would
look after her children for the year that she would be studying.
They would stay with me and go
only on Sundays to see her.
My sister was touched when I
told her this and when we went
home and discussed the matter
with the rest of my family they all
agreed that this was a good way Personal
of dealing with this sad situation.
My niece and nephew were also
Problems
okay with staying with me. Their school too was not too far
from my home.
I went home feeling very happy that I would be able to
help my sister. My husband had come home from work and I
told him what had been decided. But I got the shock of my life
when he said that he would not agree to our looking after my
niece and nephew for a year.
He reminded me that we did not have any children and so
would not know how to look after the two children. He added
that our routines would be upset and that it would also cost us
a lot. His last point was that as he did not have any siblings of
his own, he was not comfortable in my sister’s company and if
the children stayed with us, he would be forced to see a lot of
her.
I was speechless and stunned when I heard this and these
feelings were followed by intense anger. I did not say anything
and just walked away from there. A day has passed and my
husband, believing that he has won the battle, is pretending
that all is normal between us.
But he hasn’t won and my silence is just because I do not
know what to say to him or how to convince him that he is so
completely wrong in his thinking. There is also no way I’ll let
34 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
my family feel that my husband is narrow-minded and
selfish.
What do you suggest?
Your husband’s obnoxious behaviour is because he has
no siblings and so does not know what it feels like when a
sibling is in pain and one is ready to do anything one can to
help him or her. He doesn’t know what it feels like to share
your childhood and all you have with a sibling and to feel
that there is someone who will always be there for you.
But you should not give in to his selfish behaviour. So,
break your silence and talk to him. Explain how you feel and
how it is your duty to help your sister. Tell him that you will
always feel a great sense of guilt if you do not help her in
her hour of need.
My husband and I have two sons aged 35 and 38. We have
always been a very close family and from the time they were
young, the two boys have never quarrelled, have shared
things and have enjoyed each other’s company. So, when
they were in their late twenties and they decided to go into
business together, we were happy.
My sons decided on the business they would enter, drew
up a plan on how they would divide responsibilities, raised
money and got to work. Things went well for the first eight
years and all of us were happy. During this time,
Q
they both decided to get married to
wonderful women and we
A
&
became even closer as a
family. But after this, problems
arose in the business and the two brothers
differed on how to tackle these. These differences
affected their relationship and as each wife supported her
husband, the sisters-in-law fell out.
Now both brothers are barely talking to each other. They
differ on how to tackle the problems they are facing and both
my husband and I are very unhappy. Each son expects us to
support him and so do our two daughters-in-law.
My husband feels that we should support our elder son as
the younger boy should respect and obey his elder brother,
but I feel that we should support the younger one as he needs
us more as he is younger.
Whom should we support?
Each of your daughters-in-law will naturally choose to
support her husband. But for both you, your sons are equally
precious and it is absurd of you to choose whom to support
on the basis of age. Actually you should decide on whom to
support on the basis of who you think is right. But that would
be difficult unless you are knowledgeable about their
business and are in business yourself.
 All
Continental
One-course meals
have become popular
all over the world,
since these are easy to
handle and carry as
ʻpocket foodʼ. Try these
one-course meals from
all over the world.
By Roma Ghosh
Bolivian
Saltenas
INGREDIENTS:
METHOD
To prepare the filling: Boil the
other balls of dough covered with
a towel while you roll out each
potatoes, cool, peel and shred. round.
For the filling:
Heat the olive oil in a pan over On a lightly floured surface, roll
5-6 boiled potatoes
medium heat. Stir in the onion; each ball of dough into a 1/8-inch-
1 onion chopped
cook and stir until the onion has thick circle. Whisk the beaten eggs
3 cups fresh peas
softened and turned translucent. and 2 teaspoons water in a small
1 spring onion – sliced
1/ cup parsley, finely chopped Add peas and the shredded bowl. Lightly brush egg, wash on
2
potatoes, spring onion, parsley, the edges of the dough circle.
4 tsp white sugar
sugar, paprika, cumin, salt and Place about 2 tablespoons of filling
2 tsp paprika
1/ tsp ground cumin black pepper, and jalapeno sauce on one half of the dough round;
4
(optional). Simmer filling until hot. top it with about a 1/2 teaspoon of
pepper powder to taste
Remove from heat and set aside. hard-boiled eggs (optional), a few
3 tbsp jalopeno sauce
Preheat an oven to 425 degrees sliced black olives, and some
3 tbsp olive oil
F (220 degrees C). Lightly grease a raisins.
3 tbsp raisins
baking sheet, or line it with Fold the dough over the filling.
6-8 olives
parchment paper. Seal and form into half moon-
2 beaten eggs
Combine the flour, sugar, and shaped saltenas.
3 hard boiled eggs – optional
salt. Cut in the butter with a knife Place the saltena on the
salt to taste
or pastry blender until the mixture prepared baking sheet and
For dough: resembles coarse crumbs. Slowly continue with the remaining
3 cups flour add the hot water and knead until dough and filling. Use the
1 tsp sugar smooth. Keep the dough covered remaining egg wash and brush the
1 tsp paprika with plastic wrap or a clean saltenas with the egg wash. Bake
1 cup butter kitchen towel to keep it warm. in the preheated oven until golden
2 beaten eggs Divide the dough into 5-6 pieces brown. You can also use an air
salt to taste and roll then into balls. Keep the fryer for the same.
 Sausage Roll
METHOD
Mix together the beaten egg
INGREDIENTS: with the milk and beat to obtain
4 sheets ready rolled puff pastry the egg mixture.
1 tbsp milk Lay a sheet of pastry on a flat
1 egg surface. Place a sausage in the
3 chicken sausages to fit the size centre. Brush the edges with a
of the puff pastry
or use 2 sausages to make one roll
little egg mixture.
Roll up pastry to enclose
sausage, finishing seam side down.
Brush the sausage roll with the
egg wash.
Bake for 25-30 minutes or until
golden and cooked through.

Chelo Kebab
with Salad
INGREDIENTS:
500 gm minced meat
1 onion finely chopped
1 small bunch coriander
2 green chillies – chopped
1 egg beaten
1 tsp garlic paste
1/ tsp turmeric powder
2
1 tsp black pepper powder
salt to taste
METHOD
Grind the onions, coriander and
chillies to a paste. Mix this into the
minced meat paste together with
salt to taste. Grease your palms
and take portions of the minced
meat mixture on your palm and
shape each portion into elongated
kebabs, The size you can vary to
your convenience. Grill, or bake or
place on skewers for the kebabs
to cook. Serve with salad
prepared with lettuce, iceberg
cabbage, tomatoes, cucumber and
peppers.

Chicken Rice with
Mayonnaise
Topping
METHOD
Mix all the ingredients for the
marinade. Marinate the boneless
chicken with this marinade and
keep aside for 20 minutes. Grill or
roast this chicken till tender. Cut
into shreds and keep aside. Now,
heat the oil and add the shredded
cooked chicken adding the cumin,
pepper and turmeric. Stir-fry for 2-
40 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
INGREDIENTS:
For chicken:
500 gm boneless chicken
breasts
1 cup oil
2 tsp pepper powder
2 tsp cumin powder
1 tsp turmeric powder
salt to taste
For marinade the chicken:
4 tsp lemon juice
4 cloves garlic, minced
2 tsp coriander powder
1 tsp dried oregano
For rice:
1 cup long-grained rice
3 tbsp butter
11/2 tsp turmeric powder
3 tsp cumin powder
2 tbsp coriander powder
For topping:
1 cup mayonnaise
1 cup yogurt
3 minutes and put off the heat.
Keep aside.
Prepare the rice by heating the
butter, add the washed rice and
also add the spices. Stir well and
then add 2 cups of water and salt
to taste. Mix gently. Lower the
heat and cover with a lid and cook
on low fire till the rice is cooked
and all the water evaporate.
To serve: Place the rice in a
bowl or aluminum foil packet. Top
with the prepared chicken and
garnish with the mayonnaise
sauce.
To prepare the mayonnaise
sauce, mix the mayonnaise and the
yoghurt to blend well.
South African
Bunny Chow
with Chickpeas
INGREDIENTS: METHOD paprika, cook for 1 minute on
2 cups chickpeas Soak the chickpeas overnight. medium-high heat. Add chickpeas,
2 tbsp ginger-garlic paste Boil in salted water till tender but tomato paste, 1 1/2 cups water and
1 medium-sized onion – finely not overcooked. Heat oil in a pan. bring to boil. Stir to make sure
chopped Add chopped onions and cook on tomato paste has dissolved. Boil
1 green capsicum – finely chopped medium heat till translucent. Add for about 2 minutes. Add more
discarding the seeds ginger and garlic paste and saute water if the curry is too thick. Turn
1 carrot scraped gently and finely for 30 seconds. Add carrot, green off heat. Add the lemon juice and
chopped into small cubes pepper, and tomato and cook till mix gently. Serve on slices of
1 large tomato, diced the vegetables are soft. Now, add bread. You could scoop out a bun
1 tbsp curry powder salt, curry powder, turmeric and and serve in ‘pocket’ form.
1/ tsp haldi or turmeric powder
2
1/ tsp paprika powder
2
2 tbsp tomato puree
1 tsp lemon juice
bread for serving
salt to taste
 METHOD but not overcooked. Keep aside.
To prepare the chapatti: Sift Once they are ready drain the
the flour and the salt . Mix in excess water into a separate
enough water and knead to form a container and keep for the sauce.
pliable dough. Divide it into round Heat the oil and fry the onions
balls and brush the round balls till translucent. Mix in the carrots
with the oil and keep aside for 20 and the sliced peppers and garlic
minutes and fry for 2 minutes more. Add
After 20 minutes roll each of the chopped tomato and spices.
the dough balls into large Gradually add the water from
pancakes not too thick – a quarter the beans back into the pot and
inch at most. On an oiled flat pan cook on a med/high temperature
fry the chapatti, turning frequently for 10 minutes stirring and the
INGREDIENTS: so it doesn’t burn. Remove from sauce will thicken.
For chapatti: the heat and keep aside. Cut up the chapatti into strips
2 cups of flour To prepare the beans: Soak the and cover with beans and serve.
3 tbsp oil kidney beans overnight in water. This ‘pocket’ food is usually served
salt to taste Pressure-cook with salt till tender in a plastic bag.
For beans:
2 cups kidney beans
2-3 large tomatoes finely diced
2-3 carrots finely diced
1 red bell pepper finely sliced
Kikomando
1 green bell pepper finely sliced
1 red onion finely diced
1 cups cooking oil
1 tsp chilli
from Uganda
3 pods chipped garlic
1 tsp cumin powder
salt to taste
 METHOD
Sift together the salt and the flour. Mix in the
dried yeast and mix in lukewarm water to form a
pliable dough (as we do for making baturas) Keep
aside for the dough to rise. Once the dough is
risen, divide into portions. Roll out into circular
shapes with around 3 inches in diameter with the
centre being thinner than the edges. Let these
circular pieces rest on a floured surface for 30
minutes more. Heat oil for deep frying and fry
each of the circular pieces on both sides till
golden brown. Serve while still hot with sour
cream, grated cheese and chopped garlic.

Hungarian
Langos
This deep-fried flatbread is a
common street food in Hungary
where it is served warm with sour
cream and grated cheese, rubbed
with garlic or garlic butter, or INGREDIENTS:
doused with garlic water. 3 large potatoes
2 carrots cut into circles
INGREDIENTS:
2 leeks cut into 2 inch pieces
300 gm all-purpose flour
1 tsp pepper powder
7 gm dried (instant) yeast
1/ tsp salt 2 tsp mixed herbs
2 salt to taste
oil for frying
For white sauce:
For toppings: METHOD
2 cups thick cream
sour cream, grated cheese, garlic Peel the potatoes, cut into quarter
3 tsp flour
of an inch in thickness. Place in a
2 cups grated paremesan or
baking dish. Cover with the carrot
mozzarella cheese
rings and the leeks. Prepare a sauce by

German blending the flour into the cream

together with the salt, pepper and
mixed herb. Pour over the veggies and
top with the grated cheese. Bake in a

Vegetarian preheated oven till the potatoes are

tender and the top of the preparation
is a light golden in colour. Serve hot as

auf lauf
a full meal. Bake individual portions in
small bowls or foil containers so that
you can serve as pocket food. Easy to
serve and carry.
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017 45
 Baked Stuffed
INGREDIENTS:
4 firm red tomatoes
For filling: Tomatoes
1 cup risotto rice
3 tbsp olive oil
1 tsp pepper powder
10-12 basil leaves
with Risotto
2 pods garlic – finely chopped
salt to taste
Place this juice in a container and the tomatoes begin to shrivel and
METHOD add the chopped garlic, risotto the rice is cooked.
Cut a thin slice of the top of the rice, salt and pepper and the basil
tomato and with the tip of a knife, leaves. Mix well . Use this mixture Optional: You may cook the
scoop out the seeds and the juice to fill each of the tomatoes three risotto rice before adding it to the
(you need to be very careful while fourths into the tomato shells. juice and garlic pods so that you
doing so). Pass the tomato juice Tope each tomato with a small do not need to keep the tomatoes
together with the juice through a portion of the grated cheese. in the oven for too much time. This
sieve to obtain a smooth juice Place in a preheated oven at 160 will help to keep the tomatoes
without any seeds or particles. degree C for 6-7 minutes or until firm.
Bread Samosa
from Pakistan
METHOD
To start, sprinkle the spices
over the paneer slice and keep
aside.
To prepare the coating/batter:
Sift together the gramflour and
the salt and red chilli powder and
turmeric powder. Add just enough
water to obtain a thick dough
which is smooth-flowing without
lumps.
Now, assemble the bread
samosa: On one slice place the
marinated paneer piece, cover it
with another bread slice, over this
This is also a very popular
snack even in India and is often
stuffed with potatoes. In
Pakistan it is popularly stuffed
with paneer and cheese.
INGREDIENTS:
3 slices bread
1 slice cheese
150 gm cottage cheese (paneer)
preferably cut from a large
piece so as to obtain a size
which is the size of the bread
slice
1 tsp paprika
1 tsp roasted cumin powder
2 pinches cinnamon powder
salt to taste
For coating/batter:
1 small cup gramflour
2 pinches red chilli powder
2 pinches turmeric powder
oil for deep frying
salt to taste
place the cheese slice and then
cover with another slice. You will
now obtain a sandwich. Cut this
sandwich diagonally into two
halves to obtain two bread
samosas in the shape of half
triangle. Heat oil for deep frying.
Dip each of the half triangles in
gramflour batter and deep-fry in
oil one half of the pieces, one at a
time.
Turn over and fry both the sides
till golden and crispy. Serve as a
pocket food which is easy to carry
and tastes delicious. Can serve as a
snack or a full meal when served
with salad or pickles.
Mutton Shammi
Kebabs
INGREDIENTS:
500 gm minced mutton
75 gm Bengal gram dal
2 pods garlic
3 tsp chilli powder METHOD beaten egg a little at a time. Take
1 stick cinnamon Soak the dal in water for half an care that the mixture does not
4-5 cloves hour. Drain out the water and become runny.
3-4 cardamom together with the minced meat, If you don’t need the whole egg
2 onions finely chopped garlic and all the spices pressure- – use only as much as you need.
1 sprig mint leaves – finely cook, adding 2 cups of water. Cook Mix gently. Divide the dough into
chopped till the meat and dal are tender. portions. Rub your palms with oil.
2 sprigs coriander finely chopped Cool completely and then grind to Shape each portion into a round
2 chopped green chillies a paste in a food processor. shammi kebab and tava-fry or
1 beaten egg Remove to a mixing bowl and deep-fry the shammi kebabs as
1 tbsp lime juice add the adding the chopped you may desire. Pan frying or tava
oil for deep frying onion, mint coriander, green frying is always the preferred
salt to taste chillies and mix well. Add the option.
 Mac and
INGREDIENTS:
Cheese
METHOD
100 gm macaroni Boil the macaroni in salted
4 tbsp butter water till tender but not
2 tbsp flour overcooked. Drain out all the
4 cups milk –full cream excess water and keep aside. Mix
2 cups grated cheddar cheese the flour into the milk and keep
salt and pepper to taste aside. Heat a pan and melt the
butter. Lower the heat and mix in
the flour and milk mixture, stirring
all the time. Allow the milk to heat
and then add the macaroni. Stir
gently and mix in the grated
cheese. Mix gently cooking over
low heat till the cheese melts.
Serve as a full meal. Serve in foil
containers which are easy to carry.

Pita with
Peri Peri Humus
with Salad
INGREDIENTS:
For peri peri sauce:
12-14 dried red chillies
2 tsp chilli flakes – optional if you
want it extra spicy
5 pods of garlic – finely chopped
2 tsp lemon juice
2 tbsp vinegar
1 cup olive oil
METHOD and the chillies, garlic and the
For peri peri humus: To make the peri peri suace: lemon juice blend well together.
2 cups chickpeas soaked overnight Remove the stems from the red Keep this per peri sauce to add to
and then boiled in salted water chillies, break each into two three the hummus
2 tsp lemon juice pieces and soak in vinegar and To prepare the hummus: Blend
4 pods garlic leave aside for 20 minutes (you all the ingredients in a mixer to
2 tsp white sesame paste could add 4-5 tbsps of water to the form a smooth paste.
1/ cup oil
2 vinegar). Once the chillies have Now, mix the peri peri sauce
pepper to taste softened, remove from the into the hummus and serve with
salt to taste vinegar and put in a blender. Mix pita bread and salad, pickled
To serve: the other ingredients and blend beets, pickled carrots and pickled
pita bread and seasonal salad well in the mixer so that the oil raddish.

Vegetarian Quiche
METHOD
Heat the butter and add the
onions and fry till translucent. Mix
in the veggies and fry for 2-3
minutes. Keep aside.
Heat oven to 200C/180C fan/gas
6 with a large baking sheet inside.
Roll out the pastry on a lightly
floured surface until large enough
to line a 25cm loose-bottomed tart
tin, with a little overhang of pastry
all the way round the top. This will
stop the pastry shrinking in the
oven later.
If there is more overhang than
you need, trim off the excess with
scissors. Gently press the pastry
into the sides of the tin and prick
50 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
INGREDIENTS:
2 tbsp butter
2 onions sliced
2 tbsp fresh thyme leaves
300 gm shor crust pastry
2 cups chopped spinach or
seasonal veggies of your choice
300 ml thick fresh cream
100 ml milk
2 pinches nutmeg
3 eggs
2 cups grated cheddar cheese
the base with a fork. Chill for 15
minutes.
Line the pastry case with a
sheet of baking parchment and fill
with ceramic baking beans. Bake
for 15 mins on the hot baking sheet
(this helps to prevent a soggy
bottom). Carefully remove the
parchment and beans, then return
to the oven for 10 minutes more
until the pastry looks cooked like
shortbread, but is not too brown.
Beat the cream, milk and eggs
with seasoning and nutmeg, then
stir in the veggies and the cheese.
Bake for 25-30 mins until golden
and the filling is just set with a
slight wobble in the centre.
INGREDIENTS:
Chicken
Swarma
500 gm chicken breasts with
bones
For marinade:
1/ cup vinegar
2
1 cup plain yogurt METHOD taste, and adjust flavours if
1 tbsp vegetable oil To prepare chicken: Mix all the desired. Cover and refrigerate.
1/ tsp freshly ground cardamom
4 ingredients for the marinade. Mix To assemble the swarma:
1 tsp all spices in the raw chicken pieces and keep Spread one roomali roti, spread
salt and pepper to taste aside for 1 hour. Preheat the oven the sauce lightly on the roti and
to 200 degrees C. spread a small portion of the
For sauce:
1/ cup tahini Cook the chicken in the oven prepared chicken, sliced onion.
2 for 30 minutes or until the chicken
1/ cup plain yogurt Roll from all four sides to make a
4 is tender. Remove, cool and
1/ tsp minced garlic roll. Cut the roll into two halves so
2 remove the flesh from the bones
2 tbsp lemon juice that you can ‘carry the pocket
and discard the bones and keep food’ easily.
1 tbsp olive oil
the cooked chicken in a bowl to Optional: You can serve the
1 tbsp chopped fresh parsley
use. sauce separately instead of
salt and pepper to taste
In a small bowl, mix together spreading on the roti. In this case
For rolling up the swarma: the tahini, 1/4 cup yogurt, garlic, only lay out a portion of the
1/ cup sliced onion lemon juice, olive oil, and parsley.
2 prepared chicken on the roomali
4 roomali rotis Season with salt and pepper, roti and roll over.
 METHOD a lid and cook on low fire till the
To prepare the meat balls: Heat meat balls are tender, remove and
the oil and fry the onions till keep aside. To serve the pita
translucent. Mix in the garlic pods pockets place a few of the meat
and the tomato paste and balls with lettuce and lemon
continue to stir and fry over low wedges and serve.
heat for a minute more. Mix in the Optional/variation you can rub
INGREDIENTS:
meat balls and continue to stir and the inside of the pita pocket with
For meat balls: cook over low fire, adding the hummus or tahini sauce and then
300 gm readymade meat balls paprika and the tomato ketchup. place the meat balls. This will
1 large onion finely chopped Add 1 cup of water and cover with enhance the taste.
1 cup tomato paste
2 tbsp tomato ketchup
2 pods garlic finely chopped
3 tbsp oil
1 tsp paprika powder
To serve
2 pita pockets
Pita Pockets
Iceberg lettuce
lemon wedges – optional
salt to taste
with
Meat Balls
 METHOD
To prepare the kidney beans:
Place the soaked rajma with 4 cups
of water and salt to taste in a
pressure cooker and cook till
tender. Heat the oil in a broad non-
stick pan, add the onions and
garlic paste and sauté on a
medium flame for 1 minute. Add
the cooked kidney beans and add
the pastes, spices and the
remaining ingredients and stir
gently to obtain a dry mixture
which is not runny or watery.
To assemble the taco: Place a
portion of the prepared rajma
filling and serve with sour cream
and grated cheese.

INGREDIENTS:
6-8 readymade crispy taco shells
2 cups prepared kidney beans
For sour cream:
1/ cup sour cream
Crispy Taco
Shells with
2
salt and freshly ground black
pepper to taste
1 cup grated processed cheese
To prepare the kidney beans:

Red Kidney
3/ cup red rajma
4
(kidney beans), soaked overnight
in water
1 tbsp oil

Beans and Cheese

1/ cup finely chopped onions
2
1/ tsp garlic paste
2
1 cup fresh tomato pulp
1/ tsp chilli powder
2
1 tsp cumin seeds powder
2 tbsp tomato ketchup
salt to taste

Barki Samosa
INGREDIENTS:
3 medium-sized potatoes peeled
and cut into thin circles
3 tbsp olive oil
1 large onion sliced
3 pods garlic minced
12-14 olives
1 tsp paprika or chilli flakes
METHOD
Heat the olive oil and fry the
onions till translucent. Now, mix in
the potatoes and cook on
Italian Potato
medium heat (adding salt to taste)
till the potatoes are golden brown
in colour. Mix in the chilli flakes
and stir gently. Garnish with olives
Circles with
and serve as a pocket food.
Garlic and Olives
METHOD
Wash and soak daal for 15
minutes, half boil, drain water and
cool it. Chop spring onions,
coriander leaves, mint leaves and
green chillies. Mix all these
ingredients and the sultanas with
the daal.
Add salt. Heat the oil in a non-
stick pan and fry this mixture for 2
minutes. Remove and keep aside.
INGREDIENTS:
250 gm split Bengal gram
1 cup spring onions finely chopped
3 tbsp coriander leaves
2 tbsp mint leaves
3-4 chopped green chillies
2 tbsp sultanas
3 tbsp ghee
filo wraps as required
oil for deep frying
salt to taste
For flour paste:
2 tbsp flour
water
Use each filo wrap and place a
small portion of this mixture in the
middle and fold as a triangle.
Mix the flour and the water and
blend well to obtain a smooth
thick paste. Use this paste to seal
each of the samosas into triangles.
Heat oil for deep frying and fry a
few of these samosas in hot oil till
golden and crispy. Serve as pocket
/finger food.
 Dumplings
INGREDIENTS: METHOD
1 cup maida To make the filling: Squeeze
salt to taste out all the water from th tofu and
For filling: crumble it with a fork. Mix the
2 cups tofu – crumpled remaining ingredients and mix
2 tsp red chilli paste well
2 pods garlic finely chopped Sift the salt and the maida and
salt to taste knead into a pliable dough. Divide
into small portions. Roll out each
portion into small circular
chapatties. Place a small filling in
the centre and cover to form a
half-moon Dumpling.
Place in a steamer to steam and
serve as a quick and tasty pocket
food.

Hot Dog with

Avocado
Puree
INGREDIENTS:
2 hot dog buns
3 tbsp butter
2 frankfurters
3 tbsp oil
For avocado sauce:
1/
2 avocado
2 green chillies
1/ portion of green apple –cored
2
1 tsp lemon juice oil over the frankfurters and grill
salt to taste METHOD till light brown on top.
To make the avocado sauce: To serve: Slit the hot dog bun,
Blend all the ingredients together spread butter, place the grilled
in a mixer to obtain a smooth frankfurter – one in each bun and
puree. serve with avocado puree and
To grill the frankfurter: Spread ketchup. Serve warm.
INGREDIENTS:
2 cups long-grained rice
2 tbsp tamarind paste
2 tbsp vegetable oil
2 onions sliced
3 cloves garlic chopped
1/ inch fresh ginger, grated

Nasi Goreng
2
2 tsp curry powder
1/ tsp chilli flakes
2
1/ tsp turmeric
4
1/ small cabbage, thinly sliced or
2
any other vegetables including METHOD other veggies and stir gently and
carrots and capsicums or beans Soak the rice in water for 10 sauté for 3-4 minutes on low fire
3 tbsp soy sauce minutes. Drain and keep aside. till the veggies are almost cooked.
1 tbsp packed dark brown sugar Heat 4 cups of water and add the Mix in the rice and the tamarind
salt to taste soaked rice and cook on low fire, pulp. Stir gently and mix in the
For garnishing: covering with a lid and adding salt garlic, ginger curry powder and
3 tomatoes coarsely chopped to taste. Cook till the rice is tender rest of the spices and soya sauce
1 red peppers and the water is absorbed. and stir gently. Remove to a
1 cucumber diced Heat the oil in another wok and serving plate and serve garnished
1 stalk celery diced add the onions and fry till with cucumber pieces, fried egg ,
1 fried egg sunny side up translucent. Mix in the cabbage or red peppers and celery.

METHOD
Chicken Quiche
Heat the butter and add the
onions and fry till translucent. Mix
in the shredded chicken and fry
for 2-3 minutes. Keep aside.
Heat oven to 200C/180C fan/gas
6 with a large baking sheet inside.
Roll out the pastry on a lightly
floured surface until large enough
to line a 25cm loose-bottomed tart
tin, with a little overhang of pastry
all the way round the top. This will
stop the pastry shrinking in the
oven later. If there is more
overhang than you need, trim off
the excess with scissors. Gently
press the pastry into the sides of
Cevapi
from
Bosnia
INGREDIENTS:
2 cups boiled and shredded
boneless chicken
2 tbsp butter
2 onions sliced
2 tbsp fresh thyme leaves
300 gm shor crust pastry
300 ml thick fresh cream
100 ml milk
2 pinches nutmeg
3 eggs
2 cups grated Cheddar cheese
the tin and prick the base with a
fork. Chill for 15 mins.
Line the pastry case with a
sheet of baking parchment and fill
with ceramic baking beans. Bake
for 15 mins on the hot baking sheet
(this helps to prevent a soggy
bottom). Carefully remove the
parchment and beans, then return
to the oven for 10 minutes more
until the pastry looks cooked like
shortbread, but is not too brown.
Beat the cream, milk and eggs
with seasoning and nutmeg, then
stir in the chicken mixture and the
cheese. Bake for 25-30 mins until
golden and the filling is just set.
Considered by many to be
Bosnia’s national dish, Cevapi
METHOD
Mix all the ingredients together
in a mixing bowl. Grease your palm
and divide the mixture into
is to Bosnia what the portions. Shape each portion into
hamburger is to America. a round pattie and grill or roast
INGREDIENTS: each pattie till tender.
400 gm minced meat To serve: Place in a burger bun
4 tbsp lard with salad and serve as a burger
2 pods garlic – finely minced and pocket food which is easy to
salt to taste carry.
 METHOD
To serve: Scrambled eggs,
grated cheese, sour cream – 3 tbsp
each.
Cook the kidney beans in salted
water till very tender. Heat the oil
and fry the onions till translucent.
Mix in the cooked kidney beans
and all the spices and bring to boil,
INGREDIENTS:
mashing the kidney beans as you
For homemade tortillas: go along. The beans should be
2 cups flour fully mashed. Add the lime juice
1 tsp baking powder and keep aside. If required cool
3 tbsp butter the kidney bean mixture and grind
1 cup milk into a paste. This is easier to
salt to taste spread on the tortillas
For kidney beans: To prepare the tortillas at
1 cup kidney beans soaked
home: Sift together the baking
powder and salt and add the
butter and rub it into the flour.
Now, add the milk and knead into
a pliable dough. You could add a
little water if required but the
dough should be stiff and not
soggy. Divide into portions and roll
out each portion into a circular
‘chapatti’, Heat a griddle and cook
as Indian chapatties. Cook on both
sides. Prepare the tortillas in this
way.
To serve: Spread the red bean
paste and top with scrambled
eggs, grated cheese, sour cream
or even avocado mixture.

Baledas from
overnight
1/ cup oil
2
1 tsp cumin powder
1 tbsp coriander powder

Honduras
1 chopped onion
2 tsp lime juice
salt to taste
INGREDIENTS:
For filling:
2 cups cooked cous cous or
cooked fine grained rice
1 cup shredded red cabbage/green
cabbage
1 chopped onion
1 tsp oregano
1 tsp paprika
2 pods garlic – chopped finely
2 tsp lemon juice
other ingredients for filling
cucumber circles
4 tbsp olive oil
4 pita bread for making the doner
kebab
Vegetarian
4 tbsp butter for grilling the doner
kebabs
salt to taste Doner Kebab
METHOD ingredients including the spices
To prepare the filling: Heat the and lemon juice. Stir gently. Your
oil and fry the onion and garlic till filling is ready.
translucent. Mix the shredded To make the Doner kebab you
INGREDIENTS: cabbage and stir-fry for 2 minutes grill the pita bread lightly to make
a popular Sri Lankan snack till the cabbage begins to shrink in it warm. Place a portion of the
4-5 chapattis size. Mix in the cous cous (which prepared filling and slices of
1 cup browned onions has been soaked in warm salted cucumber and roll gently and
2 tsp ginger paste water for 15 minutes) or the serve at once. A good pocket food
1 tsp garlic paste cooked rice and the rest of the again.
2 tsp red chilli paste
1 tsp cumin powder

Roti Kanhai
1 tsp curry powder
1 cup tomato paste
2 beaten eggs
1 cup oil, salt to taste
METHOD
Break the chapatties into bite size pieces. Heat the oil and
add the browned onions. Mix in the ginger, garlic and the chilli
paste. Stir-fry for 2 minutes. Add the spices and cook over low
fire for 1 minute more. Keeping the flame low add 3 cups of
water. Allow the pastes and the spices to boil in the water to
form a gravy. Once the gravy begins to simmer, add the
broken pieces of chapaties and stir gently. Wait for the
chapatties to soak up the gravy. Once the mixture is
still a little soggy, mix in the beaten eggs and stir
well. Allow the egg to set. Serve as a
snack. Can be carried easily as pocket
food.
INGREDIENTS:
To serve:
2 pita pockets
2 tbsp hummus
Iceberg lettuce or mixed salad
For falafel:
1 cup chickpeas
2 tsp cumin powder
1 tsp coriander powder
1 tsp cayenne powder
1 tsp pepper powder
3 tbsp chopped onions
2 tsp chopped garlic
2 tsp chopped parsley
4 tbsp flour
salt to taste
Pita Pockets
with Falafel
METHOD
Wash and soak chickpeas for
overnight.
Process together chickpeas,
cumin, coriander, pepper,
cayenne, salt, onion, garlic, parsley
and flour to a coarse mixture. Heat
oil in a deep pan. Divide into small
portions. Shape each portion into
a small round tikkie and deep-fry in
oil till crispy and golden brown.
To serve: Cut the pita into two
halves to obtain ‘pockets’. Use
these pockets to make the tasty
pita pockets.
First line the inside of the
pocket with hummus.
Place the salad or iceberg
lettuce and then place a few
falafel in each pocket. Prepare all
the pockets in this way and serve
at once.
 Chilli con carne: Chilli with
meat) commonly known in
American English as simply
"chilli", is a spicy stew containing
chili peppers, meat, and often
tomatoes and beans.
INGREDIENTS:
1 tbsp oil
1 large onion
1 red pepper
2 garlic cloves, peeled
1 heaped tsp hot chilli powder
1 tsp paprika
1 tsp ground cumin

Chilli Corn
500g minced meat
3 chopped tomatoes
1 tsp sugar
1 cup tomato purée
100 gm kidney beans
plain boiled long grain rice, to METHOD
serve Soak the kidney beans in water
soured cream, to serve overnight. Cook in a pressure
cooker (using at least 3-4 cups of
water) adding the minced meat as
well together with salt to taste
and cook till the beans and the
mutton are tender. Keep aside.
Chop the onion into small
pieces. Cut 1 red pepper in half
lengthways, remove stalk and
wash the seeds away, then chop.
Peel and finely chop 2 garlic
cloves.
Heat the oil in a pan. Add the
onions and cook, till translucent.
Add the garlic, red pepper, hot
chilli powder, paprika and cumin
and sugar.
Add the tomatoes and the
tomato puree. Stir and mix. Now,
slowly mix in the boiled kidney
beans and the minced meat
mixture.
Stir gently and continue to cook
on low fire till the mixture begins
to thicken. Serve with plain rice as
a one-course, full meal.
Uzbek Palov INGREDIENTS: METHOD
1 kg mutton pieces Heat the fat and fry the carrots
2 cups long-grained rice till these change colour slightly.
2 cups fat Remove and keep aside. In the
1 cup carrots cut into strips same fat fry the onion pieces,
4-6 pods garlic pieces of mutton and the garlic
1 red bell pepper with seeds and continue to stir and fry till the
cut into strips mutton and the onions are brown
2 tsp curry powder in colour (this should take around
2 large onions sliced or cut 15 minutes. Stir and cook on low
into circles fire. Now, mix in the rice which has
salt to taste been washed in water and then
drain out all the water. Add the
rice and continue to stir and cook,
adding the red peppers. Add 4
cups of water and salt to taste.
Cover with a lid and continue to
cook on low fire till the rice is
almost cooked. Mix in the red bell
peppers and cook further till all
the water evaporates and the rice
is tender but not overcooked.
Serve as a one-course meal which
is easily carried as a pocket food.
Variation: You can use mutton
or chicken sheikh kebas instead of
mutton pieces.
In this case prepare the rice
without the mutton pieces and fry
the kebabs separately. Use the
fried kebabs to lace the rice. Mix
the kebabs into the rice so that the
taste of the kebabs get mixed into
the rice. We
 Because
cleanliness is the key
All about UTIs.
D
o you know that 1 in 5 women
experiences a UTI (Urinary
tract infection) at some point
in her life? Urinary tract infection is an
infection in any part of the urinary
system. Not that men don’t get them,
but it is more likely to hit the women.
Yes, that is clearly not fair but if we
see scientifically, women have a
shorter urethra and this makes it
easier for all the UTI-causing bacteria
pass through it and invade the
bladder.
Majorly, UTIs are caused by the
bacterium Escherichia coli (E.coli) that
is found in the digestive system. There
are many other causes of UTIs among
the female population. Some of the
causes include Sexual intercourse
frequent and with multiple partners,
diabetes, poor personal hygiene,
blocked flow of urine, Kidney stones,
menopause, heavy use of antibiotics
among others.
What we need to know?
At first, we need to understand the
By Tanya Malik
symptoms of a UTI. Common
symptoms include:
• A burning feeling while urinating
• Pain or pressure in your back or
lower abdomen
• A frequent or intense urge to
urinate but less urine
• Feeling tired or shaky
• Cloudy, dark, bloody, or strange-
smelling urine
• Fever or chills, if the infection
has reached the kidneys
Why it is important to know?
UTIs, if not treated on time can
lead to serious problems. While it is
usually found in the lower urinary
tract, if it gets serious, it can create
problems in the upper urinary tract as
well. And it doesn’t stop there, it can
travel up to the kidneys and cause
recurrent or long-lasting kidney
infections which can be life-
threatening. In pregnant woman, it
can be more dangerous for the
mother and infant too. It can also
increase the risk of women delivering
low birth-weight or premature
infants.
It is important to complete the full
course of treatment to ensure that
the infection is fully clear. In case of a
normal UTI, doctors will probably
recommend antibiotics, drinking
plenty of water to help relieve
symptoms and avoid dehydration. UTI
symptoms can disappear before the
infection has completely gone. This is
why, it is important to drink lots of
fluids and frequently urinate to flush
out the bacteria. Using a heating pad
to the back or abdomen also helps. If
the patient is seriously ill with the
infection, they need to be admitted to
a hospital, especially if they are
pregnant, elderly, have cancer,
diabetes, multiple sclerosis, kidney
stones.
What can we do?
Amidst all the trouble that UTIs can
cause, we need to work on our own to
safeguard ourselves. Some changes in
our daily routine can help in
preventing us from facing any
problems like UTIs in our lives.
• Drink loads of water. Water
helps in flushing out bacteria.
• Never hold your pee as it can
may make the bacteria develop
further.
• Cucumbers are high in water
content and great fluids for the body.
• Food items like cranberry, ginger
and blueberries help in reducing the
chance of UTIs.
• Maintain good personal hygiene
to avoid any infections.
• Switch to healthier habits. Quit
smoking, chewing tobacco and
drinking.
While you are out to pee, make
sure that the toilet is clean. We
cannot always consider our toilet to
be completely clean even if it is
constantly cleaned because it isn’t
germ-free. Yes, the toilet seat always
has germs around it that could lead to
UTIs and other health issues like
diarrhoea, staph and herpes. We
A graceful and pleasing figure is a
perpetual letter of recommendation.
 Car display

A model is posing next to a car from Chinese manufacturer Great

Wall Motors at the Shanghai Auto Show in Shanghai.China's Great
Wall Motor intends to make an offer to buy Italian-American car
company Fiat Chrysler Automobiles, a company spokeswoman
said on 21 August.

An elaborate display of carved fruits and vegetables is

displayed during a fruit and vegetable carving competition
in Bangkok on 4 August. It is a royal tradition that has
proved bountiful through the ages and one that Thailand's
fruit carvers are determined to keep alive -- even as young
people peel away from the unique art form.

A unique creation
A model displays a creation
by legendary Russian
designer Slava Zaitsev during
a fashion show in Moscow on
17 August.

Veg carving contest

 Royal wedding
Dennis Muhammad Abdullah (R) of the Netherlands is posing
with his bride, Princess Tunku Tun Aminah Sultan Ibrahim (L),
the only daughter of the Sultan of Johor, after their wedding at
Istana Bukit Serene in Johor Bahru.The daughter of one of
Malaysia's most powerful sultans married her Dutch fiance on
14 August in a ceremony steeped in centuries of tradition
during a day of lavish celebrations.
National Day Parade

Republic of Singapore Air Force’s Apache helicopter flies past the

Marina Bay Sands during the 52nd National Day parade and
celebration in Singapore on 9 August.

A participant in the 5th Lady on bicycle annual festival opens her bag
in the back basket of her tricycle in the Sokolniki Park in Moscow on
6 August. The festival's aim is to capture the city's fashionable
women on vintage-style bicycles.
Annual bicycle festival

Mass for terror victims

People look at the Sagrada Familia basilica in Barcelona on
20 August, before a mass to commemorate victims of two
devastating terror attacks in Barcelona and Cambrils.A
grief-stricken Barcelona prepared to commemorate
victims of two devastating terror attacks at a mass in the
city's Sagrada Familia church.
O
nce upon a time, a young
woman landed at the
Chhatrapati Shivaji
International airport in Mumbai.
Accompanying her were seven
skybags loaded on a trolly being
pushed by her Mister. She was not a
Mumbai-virgin. She had been here a
couple of times for both work as well
as play. But the Mrs felt the difference
in the air the moment she stepped
one foot out of the plane. She was
wearing two armfuls of choodas with
her designer dress and no friends
were waiting outside the arrival area
with a crate of beer. Welcome to the
Hitch Ditch.
Urban Indian marriages are as
much about diamonds as they are
about ghar ka khana. A recent IMRB-
Shaadi.com survey amongst married
people across India says that the
pressure to conform to societal norms
is still one of the major reasons that
drive Indian men and women to tie
the knot. Most enlightened English-
speaking 20-something inhabitants of
metropolitan cities in India would
pooh-pooh such a notion. Maybe, the
small-town lesser mortals, but
definitely not us, duh!
As you might have gathered by
now, this column is about marriage;
however it will hardly be educational.
What we will try to do is make you
lonely hearts find solace in the fact
that you have company in your crazy
world of serial fusterclucks.
It happened the same way most
urban Indian weddings happen. They
were both in their late 20s. They were
both postgraduates with well-paying
jobs, in New Delhi and Mumbai
respectively. They had both been in
enough relationships to feel
disillusioned with the idea of true
love. They met on Tinder, then
matched profiles on Jeevansaathi, the
parents matched the horoscopes and
the date was set for the love-cum-
arranged marriage. A lavish wedding
followed where the bill had been paid
by the father of the bride. Three days
into their honeymoon in Goa, Mister
and Mrs had faced the end of their
marriage. While Mister had wanted to
Welcome to the
Hitch Ditch.
By Shubhangi Singh
go paragliding, the Mrs had made up
her mind to go shopping at the flea
market.
WORKING OFF THE
WEARINESS
They had spent the previous two
days working off their weariness and
jetlag from the travel, endless
wedding ceremonies and infinite
relatives. So, they caught up on lost
sleep, watched TV in bed and ordered
food from room service. They also
took full advantage of the jacuzzy
(separately of course) at their special
honeymoon cottage. On their second
night, they switched off the lights and
tried the customary positions. After 10
minutes in the maze of hooks,
buttons and wrong angles, they gave
up and went back to watching reruns
of Tarak Mehta ka Ultah Chashma on
television. The next morning, neither
mentioned the nightly misadventure.
The thing with Mrs was she had a
phobia of heights that she did not
want to admit in front of her three-
day-old husband. On the other hand,
Mister needed some physical exercise
to work off last night’s harakiri. There
existed a time when having the last
word carried weight. But nowadays it
is a sign of weakness, of the fact that
you are not worthy of an answer.
Better to leave them hanging than
risk the same happening to you. So,
neither explained.
Since they both didn’t want to
relent, they ended up going to
Candolim beach. Mrs sat on the sand
watching honeymooners strike
Bollywood-inspired poses in the water
as photographers clicked away. Just
then Mister appeared out of nowhere
carrying two pitchers of chilled
mojitos. As he handed one to the Mrs,
she winked at him, “Can you spot it
too?” Mr followed her gaze to see a
chubby man proudly holding his
skinny, squirming wife up in his arms
with a supermanesque expression on
his face and a visible boner on his
shorts screaming at a photog,
“Bhaiyya, take a mind-blowing shot.
Have to put this on Facebook.” Mister
and Mrs looked at each other and
burst out laughing. We
 124
132
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Jewellery
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the
Answeiorns &
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129
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c. Monthly spa certificates.
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Which of the following jewellery items
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Most of your jewellery is...
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Name Age
b. A 50s style choker.
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a. Bright coloured jewellery.
b. Muted jewellery colours.
c. Classic jewellery colours.
d. Dark jewellery colours.
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My mother is about 60 years old. Due to joint pains she has
taken pain killers for a long time. Now, she has developed
renal failure. We have consulted with a doctor. He told us that
because of long-term use of pain killers, she developed this
problem. I want your opinion.
The susceptibility of the kidney damage by drugs stems
from the fact that it is the route of excretion for many water-
soluble compounds. Acute renal damage may arise in the
course of treatment with a number of antimicrobial drugs.
Sulphonamides may precipitate in the renal tubules calyces or
ureter and cause obstruction to urine flow and occasionally
lesions similar to polyarteritis nodosa. Streptomycin,
Vanamycin, Gentamycin and some cephalosporins may cause
proximal tubular damage and proteinuria. Penicillins,
cephalins, phenylbutazone and various pain killers may induce
an allergic acute interstitial nephritis and acute renal failure.
Tetracycline accentuates uraemia by its antianabolic effect on
protein metabolism, tetracycline and amphotericin B kept and
used after the expiry date can induce renal tubular acidosis
and sometimes a fanconi-like syndrome. Lithium may reduce
renal concentrating power and induce polyuria. No doubt,
long-term use of pain killers can cause renal failure. So, pain
killers should be taken only with consultation and under
supervision of a doctor and avoid injudicious use of pain killers.
I am a 23-year-old working woman. I am two months pregnant,
this is my first pregnancy. One week before, I suffered from
vaginal bleeding. I consulted a gynaecologist. After
examination and investigations she
told me that you are suffering from
pregnancy haemorrhages. I want to
know about the pregnancy haemorr-
hages.
It is important to distinguish
between the haemorrhages associated
with pregnancy and the haemorrhages
caused by purely local gynaecological abnormalities. The
haemorrhages of early pregnancy should always be borne in
mind when patients with irregular haemorrhages are being
investigated. The haemorrhages of early pregnancy are not
uncommon for patients to have slight vaginal bleeding in the
first few months of pregnancy at times corresponding to the
suppressed periods. All types of abortion may lead to irregular
uterine bleeding. In ectopic pregnancy uterine bleeding is
almost unavoidable. Irregular haemorrhage is also a symptom
of hydatiform mole. Later in pregnancy the different types of
antepartum haemorrhage have to be considered. It should be
borne in mind that such conditions as mucous polypi, vascular
erosions and carcinoma (cancer) of the cervix may be
coincidental with pregnancy and cause irregular haemorrhage.
I am a 45-years old woman. In the last two years I developed
small swellings on my trunk which are like deposits of fat,
which are painless and creating no problem. I have consulted a
doctor for this problem. He diagnosed me as a case of lipoma
and advised removal if it causes any trouble or increase in
size. I want your opinion.
A lipoma is a slowly growing tumour composed of fat cells
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
of the adult type. Lipomas may be encapsulated or diffuse.
They occur anywhere in the body where fat is found and earn
the titles of the universal tumour or the ubiquitous tumour.
Encapsulated lipomas are among the commonest of
tumours. A sense of fluctuation may be obtained. As would
be expected, a deeply situated lipoma is liable to be mistaken
for other swellings. Most lipomas are painless but some
giving rise to an aching sensation which may radiate multiple
lipomas are not uncommon. The tumours remain small or
moderate in size and are sometimes painful, in which case
the condition is probably one of neurolipomatosis. Large
lipomas of thighs, shoulders and retroperitoneum
occasionally undergo sarcomatous (cancerous) changes. If a
lipoma is causing trouble on account of its size, site,
appearance or the presence of pain, removal is indicated.
I am a 45-year-old working woman. For the last two years I
am suffering from pain in the back of my chest and abdomen.
The pain varies in severity and is influenced by climate
changes. I have consulted with an orthopaedic doctor. He
told me that I am suffering from fibrositis. I want to know
about the disease in detail.
Diagnosis of fibrositis is often made in cases of thoracic or
lumbar back pain, but, in fact, it is an uncommon condition.
Some even deny its existence. In many cases of supposed
fibrositis the cause of the pain is more probably a
QA
ligamentous strain or an intervertebral disc lesion.
&
Your Body
The cause of febrositis is
unknown and there are no
demonstrable pathological changes. So-
called fibrostic nodules cannot be identified
histologically. Clinical features are aching pain in the
posterior spinal muscles of varying intensity and often
influenced by climate changes. There may be rheumatic
pains in other parts of the body. On examination there is
local tenderness on palpation of the affected muscles and
small nodules may be felt. Apart from this no clinical
abnormality is found, spinal movements are full and there
is no muscle spasm. Treatment is by physiotherapy in the
form of local heat with or without massage or exercises.
I am a 35-year-old working woman, I want to know how much
calories are required for a healthy person.
Requirements for energy (calories) vary widely, even
among apparently similar individuals. The world health
organisation recommended that 3000 K Cal is adequate for a
moderately active man and 2200 K Cal for a moderately
active woman.
– Dr Sanjay Teotia
69
PE SONAL A
ccording to Dr Phillip McGraw,
“Rejection is the number one
fear among human beings.”
One of the deepest needs of humans
is the need to belong and to be
accepted. Human nature is very
complex. Since long, men are able to

n
overcome the hardships that need to
be faced during natural disasters and

o
wars. But still there is yet another and

i
the most compelling natural fear that

t
seems to overshadow most men is the
fear of rejection. This instinctive

c
emotion paralyses and hinders men
from doing things they really want to

je
do, including meeting women. A large

Re
Practical ways for men to get
over the fear. By Sudha Chandrasekaran
percentage of men feel that they can
easily run through a minefield rather
than walk up to a lady and ask her out
for a date. The biggest hurdle that
exists between most men and their
dream relationship is their hesitation
in even trying to approach women all
because they are scared of being
“rejected.” For men, rejection can
affect how they feel about
themselves as men and this could take
a toll on their self-confidence.
Therefore, many times men refuse to
approach a woman they find
attractive or want to get to know.
This is unfortunate, since they may be
missing out on a wonderful
opportunity to create a loving and
fulfilling relationship.
Let every man question himself,
“Why is it that I should fear rejection
and what is the worst case scenario
because of which it will be so
devastating that it is not worth giving
it a try?” That being said, there are
ways men can mitigate this fear of
rejection and in turn break free from
the anxiety that is present between
them and the women of their dreams.
Tell yourself: It’s not you, it’s her:
She may not be interested in getting
to know you for a variety of reasons
that have absolutely nothing to do
with you. Whatever the reason, her
turning down your attempt at flirting
may have very little to do with you
personally. Most men fear rejection
because it lowers their self-esteem. It
AS MUCH AS REJECTION
CAN HURT, KEEP IN MIND
THAT THE OTHER
PERSON IS NOT AWARE
OF THE REAL YOU. AVOID
ALLOWING THE FEAR OF
REJECTION TO PARALYSE
YOU. HAVE FAITH IN THE
KNOWLEDGE THAT
YOU’RE WORTH GETTING
TO KNOW.
is not that you should lose your
confidence if you get a negative reply
from women, because they may not
be actually rejecting you. How could
they be rejecting you when they do
not even know what you are all
about? Your offer was probably
declined because she could be already
dating someone or maybe married,
maybe having a bad day; or, like you,
having her protective shield up; and
does not feel like talking to anyone.
Every lady has her own preferences
and if she rejects you, it just could
mean that your ways are not her ‘cup
of tea’!
Fear is far worse than reality: When
you see a woman that you may be
interested in dating, approach her
immediately. If you wait too long, fear
will set in and you will drum up all
kinds of excuses not to approach her.
Rejection happens to every man:
You are not alone. Every man who has
attempted flirting has been rejected
at some point. It does not matter how
handsome, wealthy, or witty he may
be. Not everyone is compatible, and
you will not meet everyone’s needs at
all times. If this fact is accepted,
chances of decrease in personalising
rejection become possible. Having faith
in yourself is of utmost importance.
Learn to dread regret instead of
rejection: A powerful practice to
adopt is to consider the risk of regret
more than the risk of rejection. We
tend to regret the actions we do not
have the courage to execute more
than those that we do. Risk is
necessary for your emotional growth.
Avoiding rejection closes the doors to
many potentially fulfilling
relationships. Rahul had a crazy crush
on this sweet girl, but was too
concerned with rejection to ask her
out. A few years later, when he
bumped into her at a friend's party,
he found out that she also used to
have a ‘thing’ for him. Rahul finally let
her know that he had a crush on her,
to which she replied, "Why didn't you
do or say anything?" Of course, it was
too late because she was already
married!
Avoid basing your self-worth on
others’ perceptions: As much as
rejection can hurt, keep in mind that
the other person is not aware of the
real you. Avoid allowing the fear of
rejection to paralyse you. Have faith in
the knowledge that you’re worth
getting to know.
Vulnerability is an important
relationship skill, without which your
mate cannot ever truly connect with
you, and may, in turn, reject you. It is
best to practice being vulnerable in
small steps by expressing your
thoughts, feelings, and wishes in a
clear and respectful way. Deal with
negative feelings and do not shove
them under the carpet. Not taking
cognizance of negative feelings often
leads to resentment.
It is absolutely true that an
unintentional fear of rejection can
lead to the wreckage of a relationship
or stay put in a self-destructive mode
for a long time, even though you may
not be aware of it. Constructive
responses teach you about yourself
and others. Rejection is not easy. Your
response sets the stage for your
relationship experiences. What do you
choose? Get over it...I always had a
"fear of rejection" until I decided to
overcome it. The next time you get
the big "No thanks," just remember
that it's not the end of the world. We
“Challenges are what make life
interesting and overcoming them is
what makes life meaningful.”
 W
henever we think of
planning a vacation out
from our 9 to 5 schedule
what destination do you get on mind
except for Manali, Shimla, Mussoorie

V
or Nainital? Overcrowded destinations
like these makes planning a vacation
so difficult that we spend more time
on thinking for the destination than
actual execution. Sometimes just
thinking about the jams forces us to
stay at our homes rather than inviting
more headache. But don’t worry.
There’s still a lot which is yet to be
explored around us. One of these less

Tirthan
al l e y
A story to unravel.
By Aatur Sharma

travelled roads leads to Tirthan Valley

of Himachal Pradesh.
Tirthan Valley is a serene hill
station having a less crowded
surrounding. It has a low number of
houses and even lower number of
shops. The destination to stay in
Tirthan valley is Gushaini, having a
number of homestays and even
camping sites. This place is around 40
kms from the Delhi-Manali highway.
As soon as we got to know about this
place we loaded our three bikes and
got the handle in the direction
straight towards Gushaini. For this trip
we took our camping equipment,
safety essentials and other
necessities.

Day 1
To run from the heat of May in
Delhi we pulled off at 4:30 in the
morning to set the target of crossing
 Day 2
Against our thoughts of waking up
early and completing our journey
soon, we were all really tired and
forced ourselves to leave bed at
nineish. The weather was something
memorable at that place with a cold
breeze going through our hair and the
sunshine in just the appropriate
amount to not let the breeze be felt
as cold. After one hour’s drive
covering 10 kms from Aunt towards
Gushaini my bike showed the sign of
reserve petrol and I had to ask a
number of localites to know about the
petrol pump ahead, but what I got to
know is that there was no petrol
TIRTHAN VALLEY IS A SERENE HILL STATION pump anywhere ahead from that
HAVING A LESS CROWDED SURROUNDING. IT point. There were just shops keeping
a stock of petrol and selling them in
HAS A LOW NUMBER OF HOUSES AND EVEN black. So I told my mates to take a
LOWER NUMBER OF SHOPS. THE DESTINATION halt for lunch, meanwhile I travelled
back to Aunt got my tank full and got
TO STAY IN TIRTHAN VALLEY IS GUSHAINI, two cans of five litres filled up. Then,
HAVING A NUMBER OF HOMESTAYS AND EVEN without wasting time, we started
journey we ahead and, crossing some
CAMPING SITES. great scenic points, we were getting
Chandigarh before the sun started to thrash heat on us. We took a short break close to the destination.
at Karnal and continued to reach Anandpur Saheb Gurudwara from where the Before reaching the destination,
Manali highway starts. Anandpur Sahib Gurudwara is one of the largest the essence of it was mesmerising, it
Gurudwaras of country providing a 24X7 langarsewa (free food service) where was the Tirthan Valley, an example of
we had our lunch. Being the first bike trip of some in the group we took a peace in the mountains Gushaini. And
number of halts due to sheer pain. Making our speed slow, we ended up riding we finally reached the destination
in the dark for 30 kms which is not recommended at all and we had to stay which was so calm and serene that it
somewhere overnight in between the way. So Aunt it was on the Delhi-Manali made us feel the worth of riding till
highway from where the Gushaini was still 40 kms. We took a dormitory for all that place. We found our place to set
six of us costing `100/bed and that guy managed all our loaded bikes to be up our tents and parked our bikes just
parked safely. Planning to wake up early next day and completing the journey beside us. This location was just two
ASAP we tried to regain the energy by closing our eyes to back cracking pain. metres from steadity flowing Tirthan

Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017 73

 River. Within 10 minutes of us setting
up with our tents, a heavy rainfall
welcomed us, we found ourselves
sleeping inside our tents for three
continuous hours. After the rain
stopped we collected some woods to
lit and went to find some good place
to eat. We found a small restaurant
for food. There was a very sarcastic
didi who prepared andabhurji for the
dinner. With a stomach full of well
cooked food and enormous tries to
light our bonfire, our night ended
with the stars being captured on our
cameras.
Day 3
Gushaini is the base camp for a
number of treks like Shrikhand
Mahadev (5227m) through the Great
Himalayan National Park. But our
journey was for the less tiring, finding
peace and challenging the roads
experience. To fulfil the rigour of
driving, there is a way from Banjar
(10kms from Gushaini) from where
one road goes to Delhi-Manali
highway and the other road takes one
to Shimla, making it a longer route. In
BUT REACHING THE TOP between this longer route comes the
Jibhi- Shoja-Jalori pass way which is
WAS NOTHING LESS considered worse than the roads of
THAN AN ACHIEVEMENT Kinnaur. Roads to Jalori pass were
harsh enough to make two out of
AND MADE US FEEL three bikes stop and the pillion had to
ALIVE. THE drag those bikes for longest two kms.
No doubt about the beauty of the
RAJMACHAWAL AT mountains but the beasts themselves
surrendered in front of them. These
JALORI PASS WAS THE paths took most of our time to travel
BEST I’VE EVER HAD IN just 30 kms. We covered this in
around four hours. But reaching the
MY WHOLE LIFE. top was nothing less than an
achievement and made us feel alive.
The rajmachawal at Jalori pass was the
best I’ve ever had in my whole life.
This stretch forced us to get our
74 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
camps out and strike the
pins over there only. This
was the night when all our
woollens and jackets were
utilised well.
Day 4
Just like all other days, we
planned on moving early to
reach Delhi on time but as usual we
got late in packing up the bikes. From
Jalori Pass it was 180 kms to reach
Shimla which was only hilly roads
where bike going on even 60 seemed
to be really fast and we were planning
to reach Delhi by 7 in the evening as
one of our bikes was rented and we
had to reach before the time of drop.
We travelled all the way to Shimla and
thoughts about staying at Shimla, for
one more night took over our minds
but thinking about the weekday
works to be completed, our engines
kept revving. Driving on our paces we
lost coordination and 7:30 we had a
mutual halt at Chandigarh. From
where I left the complex around 8:45
and in a rage to see home I parked my
bike at home before the midnight
with one halt in between. The others
took another hour to reach. With
some storage full of memories and
crackling butts we reached our homes
safely. Some accidents might have
happened due to the bad roads and
worse driving skills, but fortunately
we all were safe. We
A great city is not to be confounded
with a populous one.
When all my classmates in high school keep discussing the
streams they will choose in college and the careers they want
to pursue, I feel very differently. I just want to get married to a
good man, and raise a large happy family. This confession has
made me the butt of jokes in the class.
Is it really necessary for a girl to work on an outside job?
Can’t she be a homemaker? I feel rather unhappy and keep
wondering if I am wrong to want this. Please advise.
In the modern world where women like to be professional
and financially independent with a good career, your ideals
will naturally stand out like a sore thumb.
But, not to worry.
You have every right to choose the life you want to live,
and to be a good wife, mother and homemaker is definitely a
very noble idea, indeed. In fact, homemaking is the most
important and significant job of all, although it is an unpaid
one.
However, having said this, the wife and mother when she is
educated, intelligent and well-informed is a valuable asset to
the family. She can raise smart, clever, curious kids and be a
complete companion for her husband. A woman without
education can confine herself only to cooking and cleaning,
without being able to participate authoritatively in the goings-
on of the family around her.
So, choose your college studies carefully, keeping in mind
that, education is not just for earning money; it is for creating
an all-rounded, scintillating personality. Politics, Economics,
Commerce, Psychology, etc, are
some of the options, you could
consider.
In the years ahead, your
friends could well envy your
peaceful, happy homelife.
I have always been plump, and Teenache
have had no problems with this.
Nowadays, however, in my teens, many poke fun at my girth.
Classmates call me Fatso, Li’l Lotta, and other such names all
in good fun-but it does hurt me deep within.
My mother asks me to ignore the jibes as I am not
unhealthily overweight. All the same, somehow, these days, I
have lost interest in food. My appetite is low,and I just peck at
my meals.
The doctor says that there is nothing wrong, and this could
stem from a subconscious desire to slim down. I feel a little
low too most of the time. Please advise.
Your suspicion that your friends’ ribbing has made you
stop enjoying food seems to be correct. Body shaming is very
much rampant nowadays, unfortunately, and unless, one is
very strong-minded, one cannot but be adversely affected by
it.
You should make a deliberate attempt to be impervious
to insensitive remarks. Young people, especially just do not
realise how words can hurt even when there was no intention
to do so.
If you really want to lose weight for yourself and not for
others, consult a good nutrition expert who can chart out a
well-balanced, healthy diet sheet for you. With her monitoring
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
and advice, you can slim down without adversely affecting
your health. It will also lift your mood and dispel the mild
depression you seem to be suffering from right now.
I am a 17- year-old girl and my best friend is a girl with whom I
share great vibes. In fact, we do everything together shop,
study, travel. We understand each other very well although we
are as different as chalk and cheese. We complement each
other totally.
But we are NOT lesbians. It is a simple, harmless, close
friendship. We are closer than sisters.
What bothers is that there are stories going around that we
are gay. In fact, boys are wary of us, although we are quite
willing to date them. How can we dispel this notion? Should
we break away from each other? Please advise.
Of course, not! Don’t pay any heed to the opinions of
others, and the gossip mill churning around you. Later, when
you find your male soulmates, everything will be clear. By the
way, being gay too is quite acceptable sexual preferences are
a personal choice, but you should be prepared to be strong
and stand up to censure and prejudice.
There is, indeed, no harm in dating boys too at your age. It
will diversify your interests in other fields as well. Perhaps, a
pleasant option is for you and your friend to go double-dating
with boys.It will not only be a pleasant change which
Q
you can enjoy, but quieten busy mouths.
A
&
I am a 15-year –old girl with long
smooth hair coming down to my waist, and I hate
it. I want short, chic cuts like my friends have. My mother
keeps entreating me not to trim it because she had always
longed for long hair but was unable to grow it. Her hair is short
and rough. I do not want to hurt her feelings, or succumb to
her emotional black mail either, but feel helpless and
frustrated. Please advise what I can do.
It is actually up to you. It is rather selfish of your mom to
live her dreams through you. If you love her and want to make
her happy, put off your plans to chop off your hair. There are
many styles which involve doubling the hair and pinning it in
place which gives the impression of short hair. In fact, this
will give you the options of retaining your long hair and also
displaying short styles. Another option is to trim your hair a
little every month ostensibly to treat split ends, and gradually
lessening its length. But your mom could see through your
strategy.
If you are extremely keen to have short hair, make a
compromise and trim it shoulder-length for a start. This may
not displease her so very much. Frankly, it is your choice,
make it.
75
Sthoorryt
S
My Dragonfly
Just what her garden needed. By Meena Murdeshwar

H
e wore distressed
jeans with a span
distance between
snag and hole and worn-out
When I asked him
threads when these were not
why he wanted considered fashionable. The
the job he checked shirt he kept ruffling
answered me must have been a bright
green and orange that had
simply and now blurred to a mossy
directly. “My green. It was two sizes too
mother says she large for his bony shoulders
and he kept pushing its
can only feed me buttonless cuffs up to his
and educate me elbows and letting them slide
at the gorrmint down again. Nonetheless he
school. If I want walked with a swagger in his
step, for he walked in his
to see pikkcher reasonably new black and
also, then I must white sports shoes with
find the money on
my own.”
radium green laces. (He
never wore them again, he
said. He had worn them only
for this “interfew”!)
He had come to me in
answer to my quest for a
‘maali boy’. My old gardener
now only came to me once a
week, so I needed someone
to sweep the ‘Shahabad
stoned’ drive and to water
the lawn, the crotons , the
flowerbeds and the fruit
trees.
When I asked him why he
wanted the job he answered
me simply and directly. “My
mother says she can only
feed me and educate me at
the gorrmint school. If I want
to see pikkcher also, then I
must find the money on my
own.”
I smiled. “ But the money
I’ll be paying you will be more
than enough for one or two
“Arre, madam,” he
tousled his own head,
exasperated at his capacity
to see movies! “Baalaiah
mera hero hai! Uska pikkcher
mai ek baar nahi, baar-baar
dekhta hoon! Punndra-bees
baar bhi! (Balaiah is my hero!
I see his movies again and
again! Even 15-20 times!)“
I sympathised with his
mother. She had three more
of his siblings to feed.
He found that I had not
got judgmental yet, so he
carried on, “I have five other
friends. Whoever has the
money buys the tickets for all
of us. Sometimes we just
wait outside the cinema haal
and when the movie has
started, the doorwalla uncle
lets us go in and fill the
empty seats. All those uncles
know us by now!”

On
pictures. What’ll you do
with the rest? Give
it to your
R eliably, he’d turn up by
four o’clock in the
evenings so that after his
most days I’d also
ask him to keep an eye mother?” work was done and he’d
on my three-year-old downed the tea and snack
grandson who would be that I’d give him, he could
allowed to muck around in the run along for the evening
mud and water while I saw to
the evening meal. I’d hear
show.
them both whooping it up in On most days I’d
the garden and laughing also ask him to
in between! keep an eye on my
three-year-old
grandson who
would be allowed
to muck around in
the mud and water
while I saw to the
evening meal. I’d hear
them both whooping
it up in the garden
and laughing in
between!
“Kya chal raha
hai?” I’d ask,
intrigued by their
merriment. (What’s going
on?)“
“Woh Baalaiah na, talwar
aise challaraha tha! (Balaiah
brandishes his sword like
this…!),” Ramesh would
elaborate, brandishing his
broom high in the air. My
grandson would be doing the
same with the stump of the
old broom that he’d found
under the mango tree and
the two of them would be
giggling in mock warfare and
yelling out fierce war cries!
Or he’d swing the water hose
above his head and the little
one would happily get wet
under the sprinkler! The two
would have to be prised
apart after such enjoyable
bonding and I would have to
cope with tears and muddy
feet and Ramesh would
finish the rest of the task in a
sober mood.
O ne day, he pulled out
from under his (by now)
four-button shirt, his Class
VII mark sheet for me to keep
safely, claiming that his
younger brother was at a
destructive stage and was
shredding all paper in sight.
He wanted me to understand
that the mark sheet was
bahuut (very) impertent and
should be treated with due
respect. It was only when I
placed it in a plastic folder
and wrote his name on it in
bold letters was he
convinced that I was worthy
of his trust. so my garden not only
Ramesh worked with me that flourished but was also filled
whole season and more, with a young , happy life.
helping me pluck (and One fine day, Ramesh just
distribute) our prodigious didn’t turn up and it was
mango crop, taking with him almost a week before
paper packets of salt and I accepted that he wouldn’t
chilli powder to eat a stash of and started looking for a
the fallen kairies in the movie replacement. There was just
hall with his friends. He’d no reason, no rhyme and I
shred the coconuts that the felt that my trust was a little
coconut picker picked and
even delivered some limes to
friends.
betrayed. Every messenger
brought in strange tidings.
It turned out that his
He flitted around my father had broken his arm
garden like a dragonfly, while fixing a door in the
sweeping, watering, kaamplex where he worked.
dancing, laughing…living out Ramesh had to intern with
his little fantasies as he hid his father immediately. If the
behind the bougainvillea birth date on his Class VII
bush or pouncing out from mark sheet was authentic, he
behind the mussanda and was just about 14 years old.
startling my grandson until Adulthood and responsibility
both dissolved in a paroxysm were collectively thrust upon
of giggles. He was agile him. There was no rite of
enough to climb the mango passage, no preparation, no
trees to the very top but, acquiescence. Overnight,
once up there, he’d get
adventurous enough to
dangle upside down , call out
without having to moult
through a chrysalis my
dragonfly had become a
to his ‘fan’ on the ground and drone !
let go his arms or stick his
tongue out. Now that his
flow of cinema tickets was
assured, he had not a care in
I saw him last week,
carrying a year-old toddler
and dragging a four-year-old
the world. Studies had never by his wrist. Father and sons
figured and were all wearing
One
homework was checked shirts,
day, he pulled out
never to be from under his (by now) black jeans,and
considered, four-button shirt, his Class yes, sports
VII mark sheet for me to keep shoes with
safely, claiming that his younger radium
brother was at a destructive stage
green laces!
and was shredding all paper in
sight. He wanted me to “Kya kar
understand that the mark sheet rahay ho,
was bahuut impertent and Ramesh?
should be treated with (What are you
due respect.
up to?)“ I asked,
hoping he could see the
delight I felt at being able
to see him outside my gate.
He said that he was
bringing his sons to see me
and he wanted me to show
them his Class VII Mark
Sheet. “Madam, inko dikha
do unka father kaise paddta
tha! (Show these boys how
well their father used to
study!)“
Fervently I hoped I’d be
able to find it after 15 years
and that it would sufficiently
impress these scions who
hadn’t even learnt to read or
write and would make
nothing of their father’s
prized achievement!
I was touched by his
confidence in my ability to
preserve his ‘impertent
daakumint’. My own
grandson was now at an
engineering college and ‘my
dragonfly’ was the father of
two!
I offered, “Ab tho mark
sheet lay jaana…” (At least
now take back your mark
sheet...)
“Rahanay do, madam,” he
said. “ Woh mark sheet! Woh
Pickkcharan! Woh hero-giri !
Sub idhar hi chhod gaya main!
Bahut mazza karra main
aapke garden mein! Thoday
badday ho jaanay do. Innko
bhi aapke hi pass laa kar
chhodunga! Jaisay hamara
purana pikkchar haal
multiplex bun gaya na , aap
innko bhi badday aadmi
banna dayna…” (Let it lie
here, madam! That mark
sheet! Those movies! That
‘hero-giri’! I left it all behind
in this garden! I enjoyed
myself here, didn’t I? Let
these two also become a
little older and I’ll bring them
here and leave them with
you. Not to have fun but to
sit here and do their
homework. Like my picture-
hall has become a big
multiplex now, you make
them both into big men.
No matter how small he
be, which father does not
dream big dreams for his
sons? We
“I am not a product of
my circumstances. I am a
product of my decisions.”
 i d e n c e
Coinc
Whatever Happeyns,
Happens for the Good
Break-up is no heart-break. By Suman Bajpai

D
eepika Singh was sitting in her office and while
sipping the coffee her mind was wandering in
the past. No, she doesn’t want to open that part
of her life but like it says whenever you try to bury
something it keeps emerging with full force. It is said
that the criss-cross lines in our hands hold our destiny,
but the sad part is that though they are in our hands, we
ourselves do not have any hold on our destiny.
Deepika still had some feelings for Uday which she
could never kill. She always hoped the best for Uday.
Whatever happened, Deepika took it as a lesson of life
and moved forward. Her NGO is running successfully

78 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017

and she is happy with her life. She is getting marriage
proposals from so many highly educated families, just
waiting for the right time and right partner.
Deepika’s parents are lawyers and she is the only
child and of course everything for them. From her
childhood days she was a happy-go-lucky girl. Beaming
eyes, soft and luscious lips, long, curly black hair, and a
petite figure. She is not only beautiful from outside but
also is a wonderful person at heart, always ready to help
others, whether friends or strangers.
She loves making friends and meeting and
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
interacting with new people through almost all the
social sites but ‘Facebook’ is her favourite. She likes
travelling and exploring new places, so one can imagine
that she always keeps her bags ready.
When she was in the final semester of her MBA and
after attending five continuous lectures, Deepika was
tired like hell! “Hi, Deepika, want to have some pizza,”
her friend in the college Mihir called her. “we all are
going,” he pointed out some of her classmates.
“Thanks Mihir, please carry on. I am tired and will go
home and rest.”
79
 She came home, asked her servant to make some tea
for her. She just want to relax at that moment. Dressed
in a loose white t-shirt and pink shorts, lying on her bed
with headphones in her ears and laptop in her hands,
Deepika was relaxing herself. She was surfing Internet
with multiple tabs open, Facebook, Twitter, G-mail,
Yahoo, LinkedIn, etc. Since a typical Facebook fan, she
was first checking her notifications on Facebook. Along
with six notifications and two messages there was a
‘Friend Request’ too. She clicked it- A profile picture of a
tall, fair and handsome guy sitting, playing piano.
“Uday Sharma , 3 Mutual Friends, Studied at Delhi
University, Works at HCL Limited, Lives in New Delhi”
80 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
and she accepted the request. Within five minutes a ping
from ‘Uday Sharma’ flashed on her screen, “hi!” she
replied back and a typical conversation started off, “how
are you” , “wassup!” , “what do you do” , “where do you
put up” and so on. It was a casual 20 minutes
conversation.
Final exams were approaching and as usual a season
of sleepless nights had begun. It has been almost four
hours since she was studying continuously. To take a
break she opened her Facebook profile. There were five
friends online out of her 635 friends and one of them was
Uday Sharma.
Uday- “Hi, still awake?”
 Deepika- “Hey! Exams are coming, was studying...
just took some break ! why are you doing at this late
hours.?”
Uday- “it was a tiring day at work...Looking for a better
job.”
And again a friendly, yet casual conversation started.
Hobbies, likes, dislikes, favourite movie, song and so on. The
conversation lasted for some two hours. Both shared some
common interests. They were fond of dance, music, watching
movies and travelling. Deepika loved Chinese food whereas
Uday loved Italian. Uday was much of a creative person and
loved to play piano. He was single.
Deepika was enjoying this phase of her life. One day they
decided to meet. Deepika got so excited. It was her first
Dating with Uday. She spent all most 2 hours in front of her
cupboard deciding what to wear! Finally after trying so many
dresses she decided to wear a classy pink colour knee-length
dress.
Uday was already waiting for her with a bouquet of tulips
in the restaurant.
“You look gorgeous!”
“Thanks,” she blushed.
After having some light snacks they went for a nice
romantic walk. Uday gently held her hand. She smiled and
blushed. Before leaving, Uday asked for a kiss from Deepika,
she could not resist and they kissed each other. Since it was
her first kiss she did not sleep that night and was thinking
about Uday and their meeting throughout the night.
Days passed and she was excited with her first interview
with a leading company. She was selected along with her
friends. Meanwhile, Deepika and Uday had come so close to
each other that they shared everything with each other from
joys to sorrows, supported each other in all highs and lows of
life. One day Uday proposed to Deepika.
“Will you be my life for whole life?”
Deepika’s eyes were filled with spark and love. A tear
rolled down from her right eye. She just hugged Uday as
tightly as she could.
It was her 24th birthday and waiting for Uday’s call. She
knew he has gone out of station for office work. ‘But even so
he can call her.” Her parents knew about Uday now and they
had no objection. Suddenly her doorbell rang. As she opened
the door she saw Uday standing with a huge bouquet of red
roses, a bottle of champagne and a gift in his hands along
with some luggage. Deepika was stunned! “What a pleasant
surprise!” and she jumped in his arms.
“I have left that job.” He said after sometime.
“Don’t worry, you will soon get new job. I am always with
you,” Deepika said holding his hands.
It was two months since Uday was sitting idle and
searching for job. Uday was out of money. He started taking
money from Deepika. Whenever he wanted money, Deepika
used to deposit it in his bank account. Deepika was always
there to help him. Finally Deepika decided to take help of
Nidhi, her best friend from college who got placed as HR
manager. Nidhi helped her with arranging interview for Uday
and providing a good job profile for him in her company and
thus Uday got his dream job. He got so excited with his new
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
job. Deepika was so happy and relieved to see Uday
employed.
“These days you don’t even call me,” Deepika said to him.
“Ya, busy with my new job.”
Couple of months passed, Uday got so much involved in
his work that he stopped paying much attention to Deepika
and started ignoring her. Deepika had no idea about the
reason behind this sudden and drastic change in Uday’s
behaviour towards her. One day she got a message on
Facebook messanger, ‘I am calling off the relationship.’
Deepika was taken aback. It was not less than a trauma for
her. She had a breakdown. Suddenly all those promises, that
love, that care turned fake. She immediately called Uday but
he disconnected the call. She was not able to sleep for nights
and kept calling him every day but every time she called him,
he used to disconnect her call.
He messaged, ‘Just get lost from my life!’
She came to know that he is living with her boss who has
promised him a big jump in the company.
Deepika left her job.
“Mom, I want to do something for the poor and needy
children and women. I want to open an NGO so that I can
provide them with all the basic needs and amenities and give
them a new family and a new life all together.”
“That is so nice of you to think this way. I am very pleased
with your courageous decision. I am always with you. You
should move on. Just understand Uday was not perfect for
you. He used you only.”
Within a span of two years, her NGO got well established
and did outstandingly well. She got new faces in her life. Each
and every person in her NGO, whether the children or women
or the staff became like a family to her. During this course of
time she realized it is never the end of anything. Life moves
on.
One day Nidhi called her. “Our company is facing trouble
due to recession and I have been assigned with the
responsibility to fire few staff members and I am going to kick
Uday out of the company!”.
“No Nidhi, please don’t do this.
“You forgot what he did to you?”
“No Nidhi, I did not forget anything. See, whatever
happens, happens for the good. Earlier I used regret for
everything that happened, but not now. I take everything as a
part of life. Had it not happened, I would have never realized
that there are people who are in even more miserable
condition and still lead their life with a smile on their face.
Leave everything to time. Uday will get whatever he deserves
and you just leave this matter”. Nidhi understood what she
said and agreed not to sack Uday. We
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81
7
N
things
Men notice about
Women right away
Prelude to a relationship.
ever judge a book by its
cover,” very true but on a
realistic level, it takes quite a
while to get to know someone. Deep
connections settle much later which
can take months. It’s tough to
establish compatibility over the
course of one drink, or even one meal
together. So, it’s a reality that
sometimes, there are things that we
would notice right away. And this is as
true for guys as it is for girls as well.
What are some of the seven things
men notice right away?
Million-dollar smile
A smile is an asset for a woman
which guys definitely take notice of.
There are different kind of smiles for
different occasions such as your smile
is friendly and genuine, something
that comes easily in response to his
silly jokes. If he sees sarcastic or
mocking smiles then he would
probably choose not to approach you
out of the blue. A genuine and open
smile sends a positive message to
guys about their personality and
makes it easier for them to feel
comfortable in approaching you.
Mesmerising Eyes
“Eyes are the window to a
person’s soul”. Eyes are said to
be one of the most
expressive organs
and show if
By Nandini Chakraborty
you’re interested or not, if you’re
nervous, happy, etc. Many polls and
studies confirm that, when it comes
to first impressions, men look into the
eyes instantly.
Body
At the end of the day, personality
means everything for a man. He is
never going to stay forever just
because the woman has a banging
body. But then again, it would be
unwise to say that men don’t notice
your body when they first meet you.
People have different tastes.
Example: some women prefer slim
guys, some prefer muscular, same is
the case with men. It’s just a matter of
preference.
Lustrous hair
Women do put a lot of time into
their hair, from getting it cut and
coloured to styling. A man will
definitely notice your looks in general.
It’s in the biology; once upon a time,
men saw thick and lustrous hair as
a sign of a woman’s health, so
they’re naturally drawn to
someone whose hair looks
healthy.
Your perfume
Guys are fascinated by
the way women smell. You
see there isn’t quite
as much variety
in the world of men’s scents as in
women’s. As a result, most women
have a distinct scent that will
definitely linger in the mind of a man.
Confidence
There are assumptions among
women that men will notice the
outspoken extroverts but this can be
far from reality. Confidence comes in
all shapes and sizes, and even a
relatively shy woman can still pack a
huge punch of confidence. Whether
his values align with yours, whether
you’re his ‘type’, whatever, if a man
senses that a woman is confident,
that’s sexy.
Friends circle
Your group of friends is your group
of friends, for a reason. You may
believe that you’re totally different
from some of the ladies in your circle
of friends but you’re able to remain
close is because you have a lot in
common with your friends. Guys know
this very well, therefore they
do take your friends circle
into consideration. We
 J
oy Chiu, a leadership and life
coach said, “Forest bathing is
grounding and I go back to the
calm feeling of being here. It’s not like
a time capsule, but something I can
continually return to.”
For many of us who live in cities,
the hectic nature of modern life can
leave us feeling tired. As the days and
weeks blend together, we exist in a
consistent state of auto-pilot. Finally
we are totally drained, physically as

Forest
Bathing
The mindʼs need of the hour!
By Sudha Chandrasekaran
well as mentally, which leads to
several health issues. Leave aside the
fancy spa wraps and expensive
massages or that digital detox. Simply
take a shower in the woods. Not
literally. We're talking of 'forest
bathing' also called 'Shinrin-yoku', the
latest mantra to regenerate oneself. It
does not involve soaking in a tub
among the woods, but means basking
in the greenery of the forest area.
Japanese invented the curative
practice of Shinrin-yoku, literally
translating into "taking in the forest
atmosphere”, way back in 1982 but it
is finding enough relevance in the
present-day chaotic world. Travellers
are waking up to the sights, smells
and sounds of nature on their
vacations for physiological and
psychological well-being. A forest
bath is quality time spent among the
trees with no distractions (no cell
phones please!). There’s no end
destination like on a hike, or specific
type of tree to seek out. It is
meditation in natural surroundings,
which does not require any
concentration or discipline unlike
meditation. In fact, the most

84 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017


JAPANESE INVENTED THE CURATIVE PRACTICE
OF SHINRIN-YOKU, LITERALLY TRANSLATING INTO
"TAKING IN THE FOREST ATMOSPHERE”,
WAY BACK IN 1982 BUT IT IS FINDING ENOUGH
RELEVANCE IN THE PRESENT-DAY
CHAOTIC WORLD.
important rule for taking a forest bath
is no effort.
Forest bathing is immersing in the
aura, vibes and medicinal aromas of
trees. The idea of Forest bath is
nothing but surrendering to nature.”
Unlike in a mountain hike or other
outdoor therapies, you needn't be
involved or active," says Acharya
Neeraj, a spiritual and yoga guru. The
stress here is on 'not doing anything'.
Slow down. Breathe in... Retain...
breathe out. Vacate your mind,
disengage your senses. You are in a
forest, make the most of it. If your
average walk in the park makes your
day, a forest bath could do much
more. The senses get regulated well in
86
a forest setting and hormones reach a
harmonious balance.
All kinds of healing are possible,
provided you switch off and do it
under the right guidance. In the
concrete jungle, with the information
and stress overload, the mantra
highlights the desperate need for a
man-nature connect... Forest bathing
works thus: just be with trees. No
hiking, no counting steps on a fit bit.
You can sit or meander, but the point
is to relax rather than accomplish
anything. It is a break from tech
gadgets and from all the noise
surrounding social media and email.
Tech workers in the West are now
increasingly adapting to this practice
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
to unplug, and it has become a
recognised stress-reduction activity
across the world, too. Many are the
groups available to take us around the
country and lead us on guided walks
which are leisurely ones through the
forest. But shinrin-yoku is so simple, it
is possible to just do it alone without
any training. For those inspired by the
Japanese practice, here are a few
scenic forests in India to rest and
recharge in a forest bath.
SOME OF THE
GREEN HAVENS IN
INDIA INCLUDE
Nanda Devi Biosphere Reserve,
Uttarakhand: A picturesque biosphere
reserve, listed in the UNESCO World’s
Heritage Site, it is one of the best
national parks in India. The reserve
offers splendid views of the peaks of
Trishul, Dunagiri and Nanda Devi,
which acts like the adrenaline
booster. Boasting greatly of flora and
fauna, Nanda Devi Biosphere Reserve
is definitely a place for those seeking
something new and refreshing.
Valley of Flowers National Park,
Uttarakhand: Another UNESCO
World’s Heritage Site, Valley of
Flowers is rejuvenation par excellence!
Situated in the Garhwal region of
beautiful state of Uttarakhand, this
national park is home to a number of
endangered species and alpine
flowers, so you can fairly expect both
a heart-warming and thrilling
experience here. Poppies, orchids and
daisies offer a scenic view in Valley of
Flowers National Park.
Shola Forests, Western Ghats:
Shola Forests are evergreen forests
found in the highest reaches of the
Western Ghats. The evergreen trees
of the tropical forest never shed their
leaves and, unlike other forest trees,
form a thick canopy not permitting
the sun's rays to penetrate the
foliage. It is an abode of the
endangered Nilgiri tahr and the
majestic flower Neelakurinji which
blooms every 12 years!
Kishatwar national park: Another
high altitude national park in Jammu
region, this park offers nature lovers
and wildlife enthusiasts something
interesting to look forward to. Sparse
forest and dense wildlife along with
great bird watching opportunity can
light up the mood. There is enough
opportunity for trekking here and
hence carry your trekking shoes and
enjoy trekking!
Silent Valley, Kerala: It consists of
evergreen tropical rainforests which
are home to beautiful flora and fauna
found rarely in India or elsewhere.
This valley is situated in Palakkad, and
is the treasure trove of knowledge for
scientists and life science students
and field biologists and, last but not
least a haven for peace lovers.
Nanda-Devi-biosphere reserve
Research has proved that visiting a
forest has real, quantifiable health
benefits, both mental and physical.
Spending just five minutes in green
spaces or in the midst of trees will
definitely improve ends health. Think
of it as a prescription with no negative
side-effects that's also free.
Swati Paranjape, a graphic
designer based in Mumbai, said,
“Nature did miracles which no
medicine could do.” She tried various
treatments for her more than 35
symptoms of fibromyalgia ranging
from acupuncture to Pilates to
psychological counselling, but
nothing worked. "Urban environment
overworks our sensory nerves. I used
to dread visiting malls and crowded
roads since they left me exhausted,"
she recalls. And then one day, on one
of her wildlife conservationist friends’
88
invitation, she retired to the
wild for a few months. "I had Valley-of-flowers national park
actually climbed a mountain
within a month of shifting,"
she shares, adding, "Forests
inspire you in a big way.
Being one with them is the
best place to be."
Forest bathing has been
found to reduce the
hormone production of
stress; lower blood pressure
and heart rate; boost the
immune system; improve
overall feelings of wellbeing; sharpen
the senses; build focus and improve
concentration; increase relaxation
levels and hence one’s sleep quotient. Francisco’s 200-member Forest
It soothes the spirit and improves the
mood and lowers hostility levels.
Being an effective meditative practice
it relaxes the parasympathetic
nervous system. There is a significant
increase in NK (natural killer) cell
activity in the week after a forest visit, benefits from even a short stroll or
the positive effects of which last for
more than a month after every
weekend visit to the woods. Forest
environments can be viewed as
therapeutic landscapes.
Patients recover from surgery
faster and better when they have a
"green" view. Researches point to the quiet calm. While several corporates
fact that patients who had “green"
views needed shorter stays in the
hospital post surgery, took fewer
painkillers, and had slightly fewer
postsurgical complications compared
to those who had no green view or
who had just a cement wall to look at.
There are many Shinrin-yoku
organisations across the world that
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
Silent valley Kerala
arrange nature walks and retreats.
Julia Plevin, a product designer and
urban forest bather, founder of San
Bathing Club, says “So much of our
lives are spent interacting with 2D
screens. This is such a bummer
because there’s a whole 3D world out
there!”
Several are the ways to
incorporate this therapy into daily life.
People can exercise in a park by
hiking, jogging or cycling. Another
option is for people to participate in
recreational activities in a forest, such
as gardening, fishing, walking dogs,
having a picnic, going to an outdoor
yoga class, observing wildlife, and
volunteering in a park. A simple
alternative for urban dwellers is for
people to take a break from their
work and sit under the trees. Forest
bathing is medical advice that is easy
to follow. The amount of time spent in
a forest does not have to be long
because people can experience the
sitting among the trees.
With the countless interactions
that we are facing daily and the
corresponding rising stress levels, this
concept is the need of the hour.
Greenery that is little and far
between, robs the urban dweller of
in the West organise 'Unplug and
Recharge in Nature' days, maybe it's
time we applied the same back home.
Are you ready to make 'outside
time', the new 'me time'? We
If you find serenity and happiness,
some people may be jealous. Be
happy anyway.
Sthoorryt
S
The Turning
Point
Nethra’s switch from virtual to real friendship.
By Chandrika R Krishnan
G
ood morning,
Nethra! I really look
forward to your
post… and once again it did
not fail to tickle my funny
bone. You really must be an
interesting person if you can
write so well. No reply to
yesterday’s query?
She remembered
that it was his
“Regards – Sandeep.”
Nethra read the short
mail and the familiar feeling
sense of humour of warmth enveloped her.
She knew it was childish and
that tempted her extremely dangerous to keep
to continue to in touch with a virtual friend,
correspond with leave alone developing what
she could only call a crush,
him. She she thought disgustingly.
remembered the She knew next to nothing
first time he had about this person who called
himself Sandeep who knew
commented on
how to use flattery to get his
her article. way, and somehow much
against her better
judgement, she
started
corresponding
with him
after his initial fan mail to her
weekly blog.
Could it be because she
was on the wrong side of 30
and still single? Was all this
unnatural interest because
she wanted someone from
the opposite sex admiring
her? She hesitated but an
overwhelming urge made
her reply to the mail and
after many tries she hoped
that it sounded just friendly
without showing her
interest.
“Hi Sandeep… Thanks
and the forward mail you
sent to me yesterday was
indeed wonderful. In
response to your query in
your mail of yesterday, I like
to read, write and sometimes
dabble in photography. I
understand that your reading
is eclectic but unlike you I am
more into non-fiction rather
than fiction. You are
mistaken in thinking that I
am an interesting person. I
am far from that – Nethra.”
A fter sending the mail,
she got busy with the
inevitable rush of Monday
mornings. Being an associate
Principal of a leading school,
it was a job that she enjoyed
Nethra
read the short
mail and the familiar
feeling of warmth
enveloped her. She knew it
was childish and extremely
dangerous to keep in touch with
a virtual friend, leave alone
developing what she could
only call a crush, she
thought disgustingly.
 SHOULDER PAIN
Shoulder pain is a common symptom in primary
care. It can be due to an intrinsic shoulder
problem but pain can also be referred from other
structures, such as neck, diaphragm or heart.
Shoulder pain is a common
problem and can be a sign of
pathology elsewhere
• Pain may be from cervical spine
• Referred pain from the gall bladder
• Referred pain from the Diaphram
Q
What are the reasons for Acute
Shoulder pain?
A Acute shoulder pain can arise from
a Stiff Shoulder, Acute rupture of a
tendon or due to abnormal calcium
deposition. Calcific tendinitis due to
abnormal calcium deposition is a
common condition which
can be managed without any
intervention.
Q
What is Tendinitis of the shoulder?
A Tendinitis or Tendinosis is
inflammation leading to inflammatory
cascade of the affected Tendon
commonly the Rotator cuff tendon or
the Biceps tendon which are
important stabilisers of the shoulder
joint. Rotator cuff tendinosis causes
lot of pain in and around the shoulder
causing inability to lift shoulder in a
painfree manner. One thing leads to
the other causing Deltoid pain
commonly felt as arm pain by the
patient.
Q
How is the Tear of the Rotator cuff
tendon treated?
A Patients presenting with chronic
pain or having pain/disability of the
shoulder inspite of thorough
physiotherapy are the candidates for
surgery. This Rotator cuff tear is
repaired using Keyhole techniques-
Arthroscopy.
Q
Do I return to previous level of
activities after undergoing Rotator
Cuff Repair?
A Yes the outcome of a arthroscopic
For all inquiries, appointments and emergencies please contact:
Leena (Ortho Coordinator) +91 – 9999712146, +91-9810669324, E-mail: drvdsharma@hotmail.com
www.orthopaedicexcellence.com
Dr. Vishwadeep Sharma
MBBS, MS (Orthopaedics)
Consultant Arthroscopic Surgeon
Fortis Hospital, Vasant Kunj, New Delhi.
Rotator cuff repair is highly successful
in the hands of experts with the latest
technology and known how.
Q
What is a Frozen Shoulder?
A Frozen Shoulder or a Stiff Shoulder
is a common condition affecting
patients especially Diabetic patients .
In this condition patient usually starts
to have pain in the shoulder during
routine activities. This condition is
commonly seen in women. The
patient first notices his/her inability to
reach out for the back pocket or
women finding it difficult to tie the
bra. This condition is progressive but
self limiting. It may last few months
and later resolve fully. But many have
very acute pain especially for the first
few weeks or months during which it
effects their sleep with the person
becoming increasingly concerned
about the end result of this condition
Q
Why do I need to consult a Specialist
Shoulder Surgeon for this condition?
A Many Shoulder diseases may mimic
the initial symptoms similar to Frozen
shoulder hence it is essential to
consult a shoulder specialist to have a
clear diagnosis.
Q
What is the best treatment for a
Frozen Shoulder?
A Most of the patients get better
initially with analgesics and
physiotherapy. Some patients with
severe pain not getting better with
simple analgesics might be probable
candidates for Intra-articular steroid
injection.
Q
Is Intra-Articular injection essential
for this condition?
A Intra-articular steroid injection
works as anti-inflammatory drug
which reduces pain. This helps in
controlling symptoms but the course
of the disease might not change.
Q
When do I require Arthroscopy of the
Shoulder joint?
A Patients who don’t respond to
conservative methods with severe
stiff shoulder might require release of
the capsule followed by early
mobilisation of the joint.
Q
I have been diagnosed with arthritis
of the shoulder what are my options
for treatment?
A Patients with advanced
osteoarthritis have the option of
undergoing joint replacement by a
specialist Shoulder Surgeon.
Q
I have a desk job by the end of the day, I
suffer from Shoulder and Neck pain?
What are the reasons for this pain?
A These days we come across many
patients with the similar complaints.
Bad Posture and unexercised
Shoulder can cause lot of Muscle
imbalance leading to Shoulder, Neck
and Scapular Pain. These patients are
corrected using right Physiotherapy
to improve Core strength and
proximal Muscle based on functional
treatment.
and dreaded particularly at
the beginning of a new week.
She noted that fewer
teachers were on
unscheduled leave, thus
making her planning for
substitute classes that much
easier. She quickly made a
mental note to appreciate
the teaching and non-
teaching staff on this and
went through the agenda for
the weekly meeting of
teachers.
S he glanced at her
appointments book and
groaned when she saw a
meeting scheduled for one of
the more difficult parents,
who felt that the world and
his wife were against her son
and, being close to the
management of the school,
she needed to be handled
with great tact. She would
take a firm stand if need be
and she was also aware that
many looked up to her for
her balanced approach. She
always thought that she had
a firm head on her shoulders
– except in the case of
corresponding with a
stranger, she thought
ruefully. She stifled her urge
to check her inbox and firmly
switched the mail from her
personal account to the
official one. ‘Enough of the
foolishness,’ she spoke
sternly to herself and left the
room. She made it a point to
come early so that she could
greet her teachers in the
lobby warmly as she felt it
built the interpersonal
relationship.
The rest of the day flew
past and Nethra was once
more alone in her room at
the end of the day and was
pleased with most things and
was glad that she headed a
team of wonderful teachers.
Though she loved her job she
was glad for some quiet time
and unwittingly Sandeep
92
came into her mind. Was he
for real? Was he really as
interesting as he sounded in
mails? Was he married? Her
heart sank with that
thought…most unbecoming
of a lady who was supposed
to lead a lot of young minds.
She opened her mail
wondering if he was jobless
to keep writing to her and a
mixed feeling enveloped her
when she read a short mail, “
I don’t agree….but cannot
argue now. Need to save
energy to argue with the
boss!..., Sandeep.”
Nethra smiled. She
remembered that it was his
sense of humour that
tempted her to continue to
correspond with him. She
remembered the first time
he had commented on her
article. The article had
appeared in the newspaper
and he had commented on it
just like many others. He had
written a formal mail
apologising for having the
temerity to write but he
wanted to show his
appreciation, etc.
S he initially thought that
he was a young boy and
hence decided to put him at
ease and had replied in jest.
“Dear Sandeep,
“I am not sure how old
you are and hope that my
addressing you by your name
is not incorrect. No
appreciation is unwelcome
and hence yours is very
welcome.
“Nethra.”
He had immediately
replied saying that he was
just 25, though official
records got it wrong by
recording it a decade older!
He had further written that
he had read through most of
her blogs and articles and
had disagreed with a few of
her views, though he
appreciated her style of
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
putting forth her points
succinctly. Nethra wasn’t
sure why she was interested
in his mail … she was a
pragmatic person. To all the
comments to her blogs or
articles, her reply was to the
point of being boring or
simple thanks. Yet, here she
was not just communicating
with a man who she did not
know from Adam, but also
fantasising about it! If one of
her students had come to her
with this problem, she would
have spent an hour warning
on the ill-effects of virtual
friendship and here she was
no worse than her teenage
wards.
Now being a
thorough gentleman
he had put her on
the spot. After
typing and
discarding the
message many a
time, she logged out
and shut the
computer in disgust
and decided to
sleep on her
decision.
“Dear Nethra,
“I agree with you that you
are the most uninteresting
person and the reasons are
many. I really wonder how
your team of teachers and
students are putting up with
such a drab person! Your idea
of dabbling in photography
seems to differ from the
judges of photography
contests as I found that you
have been a winner in a few
of those. I know all this
because I ‘googled’ you and
found you very interesting.
“Before I proceed, I am an
architect and my partners
and I have designed a few
office spaces and our next
project is adjacent to your
school. I saw your profile in
Linkedin and no I am not
stalking you. I am divorced
and have no children, which
is a blessing, considering the
monumental blunder I had
committed by marrying
simply for the sake of society
without much thought to our
future. My ex-wife is happily
married and I am happy for
her. Can we meet for coffee
anytime next week? The
venue, time and date is as
per your convenience. If you
are not interested, that too is
fine by me, though I hope we
can meet to find out if we
really can graduate from
acquaintance to friends.
Regards, Sandeep.”
N ethra felt her stomach
clench when she read
the mail for the fifth time.
Should she or shouldn’t she?
She wished he were more
assertive than leaving the
decision to her. If he had
been, she would have taken
umbrage at his
presumptuousness and it
would have been easy to
reject his offer. Now being a
thorough gentleman he had
put her on the spot. After
typing and discarding the
message many a time, she
logged out and shut the
computer in disgust and
decided to sleep on her
decision. She wished that
she had someone to talk to
but she knew that most of
her friends would not
encourage her…she stopped
short…she actually had no
friends.
She had no one to share
her innermost thoughts. Was
she so caught up in keeping
up the image of a strict
principal that she had
forgotten to be more
human? She remembered
that there was a time when
she had a great time with her
fellow teachers but as she
started climbing the
professional ladder, the
friends petered out. It is
really lonely at the top, she
thought. Caught in her
troubled thoughts, she
absent-mindedly waved her
thanks to the security as she
drove out of the gates of the
school not picking up speed
as she was examining the
semi- constructed building
adjacent to the school
wondering if he was in
somewhere making a plan.
S he went home as the
usual, “How late you
come home, Nethra? I have
been alone throughout the
day and you did not bother
to even call me to find out if I
am all right?”
Nethra sighed and bit her
tongue before she said
something that hurt her
mother. She wanted to tell
her mother to leave home
and go to her other children’s
house, but she knew that her
mother was not welcome
there and it was that fact
that made her acerbic
whenever she came home
after a long day at work. She
remained silent but banged
the bathroom door to show
her displeasure. She knew
that by the time she
managed to freshen up, her
mother would be in a more
amicable mood.
Nethra was upset that
both her brother and sister
had turned their back to her
and her mother once they
became independent. Both
Her
eyes registered
too many things too soon
as she neared him. He smelled
nice too and sounded wonderful
when his question, “Nethra?” had
her nodding and mentally shaking
away the feeling of losing control.
She fell off the cliff of control on
which she was dangerously
teetering when he gave her a
one-stemmed yellow rose,
her very first gift in the
form of a flower.
Both of them were
busy with their own
families and neither
of them even
thought about
Nethra and her
plans for her
marriage. They were
also more than
happy leaving their
mother to her
responsibility.
of them were busy with their
own families and neither of
them even thought about
Nethra and her plans for her
marriage. They were also
more than happy leaving
their mother to her
responsibility. She was
surprised that even her
mother had stopped
broaching the topic of her
marriage once she crossed
her 20s. Maybe, they all felt
that she had missed the bus
…or incapable of finding a
match, even though the fact
remained that she had been
too busy playing surrogate
father to her siblings to think
of her own marriage when
she was younger.
She came out of the
washroom to see her mother
all ready with the tea and
snacks, her way of an
apology. Nethra sat beside
her and listened to her
criticism of the help she had
hired to take care of her
mother during the day.
Her restlessness
continued even when she
went to bed late in the night.
Why and how has she come
to this state when she had
nobody to speak to? The
thought troubled her.
E ven if she did overcome
her distrust to the virtual
friend, how could she be
assured that Sandeep would
like her and continue to do so
when it was so evident that
she was far from likeable?
She rephrased the adjective
more so on a personal level.
She knew she was successful
professionally, but …even
her own family did not seem
to like her. Her siblings did
not much care now that she
had outlived her usefulness,
she thought sourly – or was it
something to do with her
own mental make-up? It was
nearing two in the early
hours of the morning when
she decided to meet
Sandeep and take it on from
there.
“Dear Sandeep,
“Yes. Can we meet at
Infinitea in Cunningham
Road this coming Saturday
at 6?
“Nethra.”
Only after sending the
mail did she sleep peacefully
till her alarm shrilly woke her
up.
Nethra was extremely
nervous when she stepped
into the cool environment of
Infinitea on the said day. She
wondered if she should have
a rose on her head or asked
him to put one on his lapel.
How the hell will they be able
to recognise one another
was her concern. Barely had
she thought on those lines,
her eyes were drawn to a
person whose eyes bored
into hers as he stood up from
the stool that he was
occupying. She paused for
several seconds as her eyes
took in his height, his wavy
hair, his clean-shaven face,
his dark navy blue shirt and
fawn trousers. Her eyes
registered too many things
too soon as she neared him.
He smelled nice too and
sounded wonderful when his
question, “Nethra?” had her
nodding and mentally
shaking away the feeling of
losing control.
S he fell off the cliff of
control on which she was
dangerously teetering when
he gave her a one-stemmed
yellow rose, her very first gift
in the form of a flower. She
almost wished that she
found him boring or found
some other irritating
mannerism so that she would
have a reason to get her life
back to normalcy. Her mind
screamed a warning and
wanted her back away from
this dangerous situation
though her heart wanted her
to let go the rational
thoughts and she allowed
the latter to take over.
Sandeep kept silent as he
waited for her to regain her
composure as was evident
and also to allow his own
heart to settle down. He was
not a romantic person and
never expected the force of
such attraction at the very
first meet. He had been sure
that she was the girl as soon
as she walked in and felt
completely alienated from
the crowd as she had walked
slowly towards him. A man
whose family always accused
96
him of not observing things
that were right under his
nose, happened to notice the
way she brushed back the
stray strand of her hair, the
way she hitched up her
handbag on her shoulder and
almost heard the rustle of
the black and white cotton
sari as she walked
interminably across the
room. The almost fluid walk
had him swallowing and
hoping his words will not
come out as a croak.
Both of them got along
well after the initial
awkwardness much to their
surprise and both looked
forward to their frequent
mails and their weekly
meetings. It was no surprise
to her when Sandeep
proposed to her after six
months of their knowing
each other. She was almost
looking forward to it right
from their first meet and
knew it was only a matter of
time before both of them
would act on their continued
attraction.
H
er mother was none too
happy and kept warning
Nethra that she was allowing
an already married, younger
man to take her for a ride.
Even her siblings came
running to warn her and
made sure that they both felt
that she has lost her mind.
All the agony that she was
going through did not miss
Sandeep. As they were
walking along the Hebbal
Lake one evening in the
Lumbini Gardens, he came
straight to the point and
addressed her fear on his
proposal and the impact of it
on her family. “Nethra, I did
not take any hasty decision
though I wanted to propose
to you the very first evening
we met. With due respect to
your family, it is your
decision and you are old
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
enough to make it.”
Nethra had nothing
concrete to reject the
proposal, nor did she want
to. Everyone, even her
mother and siblings, only
spoke about what they
wanted and none of them
wanted to know or ask her
what she wanted. That hurt
her more.
The words of Sandeep
kept playing in her mind.
Was she one of those who
was watching the world go
by rather than living in it?
Was she a type who shied
away from any kind of risks
in life? Yes and a capital one
too.
“Life is a gamble, Nethra.
My earlier marriage did not
work. I am not sure if this will
but my gut feeling says this
time around would be better.
I will not make the same
mistakes I did in my earlier
He took her hand
and rubbing her
palms gently
continued, “I
understood the
trepidation you
must have felt when
I realised that your
mail was sent in the
early hours of the
morning. Do you
know the tagline for
Infinitea?”
relationship. You remember
the mail that you sent
selecting the place for our
first meet?”
She nodded and tried to
swallow the lump that was
firmly lodged in her throat.
He took her hand and
rubbing her palms gently
continued, “I understood the
trepidation you must have
felt when I realised that your
mail was sent in the early
hours of the morning. Do you
know the tagline for
Infinitea?”
She shook her head and
he continued, “Make its life
tasty…So…” He shrugged
and with a crooked smile
that she found very
attractive, he said, “I think
you had decided by default
to make your life tasty.
Moreover, the risk would be
all the more worthwhile if I
have you by my side…so
sleep on it , but not for ever
please…for I would like to be
a part of that bed. Once
again the decision is yours
and I will go by it even if I
don’t like it.”
He had not spoken on the
topic ever since and she had
been left wondering and she
has been doing the same
ever since.
S he had informed him that
she would let him know
by the Saturday next and the
mails had continued as
before. It was the Friday
evening and she had to let
him know of her decision the
next day. She could not sleep
and she spent her time
alternatively pacing, thinking
and wondering on the way
her life has been brought to a
crossroad. Which road to
choose? Should she choose
the unknown one with a
possibility of excitement or
the one which she knew very
well and was almost
monotonous in its
familiarity? Why had she no
one to call her own and, as
she watched the day dawn,
she came to a decision. The
rising sun decided for her and
she smiled, relieved that she
was ready to ‘live’ her life and
make her life tasty. We
Friends show their love
in times of trouble, not in
happiness.

IS YOUR
RELATIONSHIP
CONTROLLING
YOU?
Here are nine signs!
By Sanjana Saini
A
s much as we enjoy being in relationships, we sometimes
overlook the fact that it starts to control us. We let go of
our senses and don’t think about anything else.
If you have ever been in this situation, then you’ll understand
what harm comes from letting your relationship control you.
You have no
self-focus
You do what is
best for your
relationship which
might not necessarily
mean that it is the best for
you. You compromise to such
an extent that it affects you
personally. Since you don’t focus
on yourself, you overlook it too.
You lose your identity
Since you give more importance to
your relationship and the guy, you just
do things that are good for him. In the
course of time, you start losing your
identity and become someone else
just to please this guy.
You do not see his flaws
This guy would be the worst
person on Earth but you would not
see his flaws. Even if you do, you
accept him for the way he is because
for you love means being tolerant.
This is not wrong but you need to
know that everything has a limit and if
it starts harming you, it shouldn’t be
acceptable.
You are not motivated
Sometimes, the guy you date
might not be very focussed on his
ambitions or aspirations which will
also take a toll on you. The person you
choose to spend time with has an
effect on you and you won’t even
realise it. This will result in you not
being motivated enough and you will
lose your focus in life.
You are caught up in the past
Things that have happened in the
past are still your hot topic of
discussion. Your partner cannot seem
to move on and you seem to keep
justifying yourself over and over again.
You over-compromise
Every relationship requires
compromising but if you over do it,
you are letting your relationship take
control of yourself. Be it buying
presents, waiting for him or even
looking good for him, you will not
even think to negotiate with him. You
adjust with everything he does.
Negativity is a part of your life
Whether it is something that you
are meaning to do or some adventure
you want to try, if your partner is
negative about things, you are never
going to enjoy it. You are going to be
stuck with doing nothing.
You seldom give your opinion
For whatever it is, your opinions
and views do not matter because
what he says or suggests is more
important. You do not even seem to
be a part of any decision-making and
whatever he says, happens.
You fix them instead of yourself
It is good to be a help to others
and if it is your partner who needs the
help, it is great that you help him
figure things out. But if you are the
only one doing all the fixing, you
won’t have any time to focus on fixing
the things that have gone wrong in
your life. You’re not their mother to
help them out and you will just be left
with helping them. We
I am a 20-year-old college student. I live with my parents, my
two elder brothers and my large joint family. I am the only
girl in the family as well as the youngest.
As is to be expected, we always have a lot of people visiting
us, as all of us have friends who come to visit us. One such
visitor was a man whom my uncles had met at a wedding and
had taken a liking to. When he had told them that he had
come to the city on transfer and that he hadn’t brought his
family with him, they had invited him home and after that he
began to visit us frequently.
Because he cracked good jokes he became very popular
with the whole family. But somehow I never liked him because
to me he seemed sly and always seemed to be watching
everyone and observing things about the family. So, I was
rather relieved when he suddenly stopped coming home. My
uncles initially wondered at this but then decided that his
family had probably joined him and that he had become
busy.
Some months after this, a terrible thing happened. One
night when all of us were asleep, a group of thieves got into
the house, sprayed us with some sort of medicine that made
us sleep soundly and looted the house of everything of value.
They obviously knew all about us, where we slept, the kind of
locks on the doors, what valuables we kept at home and where
– everything.
All of us are distraught and the
police have been called in. But I am
sure that the man who used to visit us
is behind the theft. I have no proof,
but something makes me sure. I am
nervous of telling the police. What
should I do?
There is a good chance that your
suspicions may be proved right. So
why don’t you speak to your uncles who first became friendly
with this man? Tell them about your suspicions and ask them
how they became friendly with this man. Had any friend
introduced him to them or had this just begun to talk to him at
that wedding?
Once you tell them about your suspicions, they can decide
if they should tell the police about the man.
I am a 20-year-old college student. Like most college students,
I am apart of a group of students who are friends. There are
both girls and boys in this group and we have a lot of fun
together, we study together, exchange notes and help each
other. We have all been friends for three years and we know
each other very well.
But there is one boy in the group with whom I have not
been comfortable from the beginning. I don’t know why but I
do not trust him and though he is part of our group, I avoid
him as much as possible.
I have never spoken about my dislike and even slight fear
of this boy to anyone, but recently I did so to a girl in our
group. This was when she told me that this boy had told
another boy in our group that he was fond of me.
Though I at once told this girl not to tell anyone what I had
said, she told another girl who told someone else in our group
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
and soon the boy concerned had heard what I had said.
Now, he is furious with me and doesn’t talk to me. I don’t
really care if he doesn’t, but I am now feeling terrified of him.
What should I do?
Young people are usually very sensitive and quick to take
umbrage. So this young man is likely to be feeling a mixture of
anger and embarrassment. It would therefore be a good
gesture on your part to apologise to him in the presence of
others in your group and say that you don’t know why you
said something so stupid. After this you should make an effort
to be friendly with him.
But though this may seem contradictory, you should also
be careful where this youth is concerned. You say that you
have never been comfortable with him and such feelings are
often warnings that come from a third sense within us.
I have a very good friend whom I have known from childhood.
Our parents are friends too and because of this we have grown
even closer. We have also gone to the same school and
college, but I have always known that my friend’s parents are
not very well off and that my parents have often helped her
parents with money.
Both my friend and I are good at studies and, since we
have always taken the same subjects, we have always
QA
vied for the first place in studies.
My family,
&
My friends and me...
Now, we both have
finished our post-graduation and I
have got better marks this time. We applied
for jobs in the same company which has a very good
reputation in our field and both of us have passed the
preliminary stages of selection.
Now, I have come to know from an older friend who works
in the same company that there is only one vacancy and that
my friend and I are the only ones under consideration. He also
told me that since I have the better marks, I am likely to be
selected.
The company is a very good one and whoever is taken on
will be set for life in an excellent and permanent job. But my
friend needs the job more than I do. Should I give up the job
for her sake? I am confident that I will get another job, though
it might not be as good as this one. I plan to never tell her
what I have done to ensure that she does not feel embarrassed
or beholden to me.
It would be very large-hearted of you to give up this job
and let your friend have it, without letting her know that you
have given up such a good job for her sake. But have you
thought of the possibility that your friend might have too
much self-respect to accept this sacrifice from you?
99
 On D e n i m
10 ways to chic it out.
D
enim on denim never fails to elevate your fashion
style. If done right, it can become the most
flattering and stylish fashion statement. All you
need is a good pair of distressed jeans, an oversized denim
shirt, some chunky baubles and the perfect attitude to
flaunt the look. It can seem to be a hard trend to pull off
for some, but it’s highly recommended and is more street
than ever. Denims are considered as one of the most
By Anupriya Khanna
conveniently available fashion classics that underlines your
individuality and chicness altogether. And this is how
double denim is every other girl’s first choice to make
without being self-conscious in the slightest.
Choosing the right combination of denims as overalls is
imperative to nailing the look. Once that is done, opt for
suitable contrasting accessories to blend with your outfit
to complete the look.
Here are some refreshing ways to go double denim this season:
✿ These denim
culottes teamed up
with a denim shirt of
1 ✿ Styling a baggy denim jacket with a knitted
fringe top over cut-off denim shorts can never go
out of fashion. Pair it with some super comfortable
6
a similar shade look
bolder than ever. platform brogues, jet black sunnies for a hot
And what‘s best summer day and let the compliments take flight.
about this look is the
throw-on green coat
that is sure to make
you stand out from 2 7 ✿ How about a
denim button-
the crowd. Also, the down shirt
block-heel camel tucked in
ankle-length boots pencil-cut a jean skirt for the day?
fit the best for the look. Go and boggle a few minds by
coordinating it well with nude

3 ✿ Bored of
wearing those
usual white
pants? Try
statement heels and a tan
handbag.

something new
this season by ✿ Red is the new
experimenting
with stitched details and floral
patchworks. This pair of white
embroidered floral pants will
black! Aren’t
these super hot
red-fringed suede sandals
complementing this
8
blow your mind away when double-denim shirt and
grouped with masculine elements jeans combo? To avoid
like a distressed denim jacket and looking odd, play around
retro-inspired sunglasses. with different shades of

✿ Add edge to your denim-on-

4 ✿ Life isn’t perfect
but your outfit can
blue while going denim-on-
denim. This medium-
wash denim boyfriend
shirt looks awesome
denim look by pairing this cute with these high-rise
sea chambray bandeau top in be. This dark blue
denim boyfriend skinny jeans.
denim with this A-line miniskirt.
Try and vary the shades of the
two as this creates a nice
contrast to your outfit. An
incredible piece of golden, shiny
shirt teamed with
white high-flare
high-rise jeans is a
quintessential
✿ Its fun switching things
up a bit by having a more
9
piece to keep you relaxed look. These
handcuffs, a tassel statement
in trend this frayed hem jeans paired
necklace and an amazing pair of
summer. These with a white bralette and
studded denim platforms
canvas sandals, a longline duster coat can
slingback sandals are good to go
vintage sunnies and black leather turn out to be your
with this look.
tote will always look professional ultimate go-to for the

5 and can serve to be a great option day. Also, don’t forget to

as one of your wardrobe put on your fancy shoes.
✿ This double- essentials.
denim look is ideal
for a weekend getaway. ✿ Incorporate a denim coordinate set in your
Coordinate a denim fringe crop wardrobe. This denim crop-top and high-rise
top with slim-fit boyfriend jeans culotte can be teamed up for a cool daytime
and complete your look with a look. And, for accessories, a broad-brimmed
light-weight striped open poncho
and a pair of brown mules.
10 hat is just the right thing to add to your instant
cool girl vibe. We
Sthoorryt
S
Monsoon Reverie
Unexpected companionship on an unplanned trip.
V
idhu opened an eye
and glanced lazily at
the time on her
mobile. It showed 6.45 am.
She turned her gaze towards
the window and was
surprised to see that it was
still dark outside. She
clambered out of bed and
stood gazing out through the
All of a sudden window. The tall apartment
he glanced at building that she could see
her and smiled. from her window situated
just half a kilometre away
Mildly taken was not bathed in golden
aback, Vidhu sunshine as it usually was.
smiled back. He Instead, heavy dark
monsoon clouds loomed low
resumed his
and large over the horizon.
texting. After a The vast vacant plot of land
while he took out with verdant greenery
a tightly rolled spread out just below her
apartment contrasted well
parcel from his with the dark clouds. Vidhu
bag and felt a sense of peace and
unpacked it. calm settle over her.
Heavy monsoon showers
over the past two days had
made water collect in
stagnant pools in the green
By Valsala Menon
plot of land and Vidhu
noticed a white stork
winging gracefully in a lovely
arc and swooping down to
catch tiny fish from these
stagnant pools. There were a
lot of storks and herons who
come back every year to
make it their home during
the monsoon. A few of them
could be seen settling
happily on the backs of
buffaloes having a swim in
the pools.
Vidhu made herself a
piping hot cup of tea and
settled down on the window
sill to watch the birds and
buffaloes, while casually
A favourite writer Ruskin Bond.
tall, well-built
handsome young man
sporting a white long-
sleeved shirt and blue jeans
got into the train. He strode
purposefully to where she
was seated and sat
opposite her.
turning the pages of the
Sunday papers. She felt a
kinship with the buffaloes,
lazily grazing away with not a
worry in the world. The
entire day stretched ahead of
her and she was undecided
as to what she wanted to do
the whole day. Half her mind
craved some fun and
spontaneity. Vidhu moved
towards her book shelf lined
with all her treasured
collection of books by her
favourite authors. She
lovingly traced the outline of
the well-catalogued books
with her fingers until it
stopped at one titled The
Night Train at Deoli by her
She stood stock still as a
seedling of an idea formed in
her mind. Yes, trains. That
was what she wanted to do
for the day. She decided to
take a local train from
Chetpet and go all the way
up to the last station,
meander around for a while,
getting lost in the milling
crowds and then come back
home.
Until just over a year ago,
Vidhu had been working for a
magazine at Adyar, and she
had so loved commuting on
the trains. She had loved the
journey, taking in the
essence and soul of the
people who travelled with
her, the sights and sounds,
the vendors on the trains, all
of them had been fodder for
her writer’s soul. With her
husband away on a business
tour, Vidhu had the entire
day to herself. With her mind
made up, she quickly
showered, changed into a
baby pink salwar, grabbed
her purse, mobile, glasses
and her journal and made her
way out.
A s she approached the
station, there was a loud
clap of thunder, and it
started to pour. Oops! In her
hurry, she had forgotten her
umbrella. ‘Was it a bad idea
to have come out in this
rain?’ She brushed the
thought aside.
Vidhu waited patiently in
the long meandering queue
to get her ticket. It was
raining cats and dogs and she
felt the cold seeping into her
soul and dampening her
enthusiasm.
‘Gosh! I am hungry, lonely
and to top it all I have
forgotten my umbrella too.
Silly me,’ she berated
herself. The train chugged
into the station and with a
resigned sigh she got in and
thankfully found a window
seat. It being Sunday, and a
rainy day at that, there
weren’t many passengers,
and that made her feel all the
more alone and depressed.
As the train rattled along,
the rain dwindled to a mere
drizzle and her mood lifted
slightly. But she realised with
a jolt that she had missed her
breakfast entirely and now
she was ravenously hungry.
She hoped that a vendor
would come in at the next
station selling fruits or her
favourite butter biscuits.
As the train stopped at
the next station, instead of a
vendor, a tall, well-built
handsome young man
sporting a white long-
sleeved shirt and blue jeans
got into the train. He strode
purposefully to where she
was seated and sat opposite
her. He had a backpack
straddled on his back, a
camera, handicam, and a
huge lunch bag. Vidhu felt a
smile tug at her lips and she
turned away and kept
looking out of the window.
From his backpack he took
out a book, his mobile, a
newspaper, and with just a
nod in her direction he went
on texting someone. A keen
observer of human nature,
Vidhu turned her focus on
the young man and started
studying him surreptitiously.
All of a sudden he glanced
at her and smiled. Mildly
taken aback, Vidhu smiled
back. He resumed his
texting. After a while he took
out a tightly rolled parcel
from his bag and unpacked
it. Vidhu noticed that there
were rotis and home-made
pickles which he attacked
with gusto. She felt her
mouth water, and could even
feel her stomach growl.
Feeling embarrassed, she
turned away from him and
kept staring out through the
window.
“Care to have some of my
home-made rotis and pickle?
My mom is an amazing
cook,” the young man spoke
to her with a smile.
She smiled back but
politely declined. A moment
later, he brandished an
orange and peeled it. He
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
handed her half of it and
said, “Of course, you can’t
say no to an orange. It’s
great for warding off colds in
this weather.”
S he found it immensely
funny and, biting back a
laugh, she gracefully
accepted the orange. Next,
he unpacked crisp khakras,
sprinkled peanut powder on
them liberally and handed
one to her.
“Oh no… I don’t want
this,” Vidhu exclaimed.
“Come on… this is a
Gujarati delicacy. I am sure
you would love to have some
khakras in this weather. They
are home-made ones. Please
have some.”
Vidhu’s stomach took
precedence over her mind
and she found herself
Naman and Vidhu
plopped down on a
bench in a wayside
park. Vidhu took out
and scribbled fast
in her journal,
eager not to miss
out details of this
amazing day.
Naman meanwhile
fiddled with his
camera.
tucking into the lovely
khakras. Both of them shared
a companionable silence
while they ate.
“I am a software
engineer, but on weekends I
pursue my passion, and that
is photography,“ smilingly
explained the young man.”I
freelance quite a lot, and for
a lot of travel magazines and
blogs. I have my own blog
too.”
Vidhu smiled back and
introduced herself as a
freelance writer and novelist
in the making.
“Are you going some
place to meet someone? To
write about them? I am sorry
if I am being inquisitive,” the
young man smiled
apologetically.
“Well, I love commuting
by these local trains, and
travelling on them inspires
me a lot and gives me ample
material to weave into my
writings,” explained Vidhu.
“Great... By the way, I am
Naman. My wife is away at
her home for her delivery.
Felt bored being at home all
alone and decided to come
out with my equipment to
capture pics for my next
project, titled The Monsoon
Reverie.”
“Wow! That’s fantastic. I
am Vidhu . My husband too is
away on a business tour and I
too responded to my
impulsive adventurous
instinct.” Vidhu felt an easy
camaraderie developing
between them both.
T
hey continued talking
about books and it was
easy, light-hearted yet
intelligent banter. An hour
later, it was time for them to
both get off the train.
“Well, I am getting off
here. It was nice meeting
you,” smiled Naman.
“Me too. It has been fun.
And thanks for the food. I
was truly ravenous.”
“My pleasure. I just
responded to your stomach’s
rumbling for food.”
She looked up startled
and noticed him sporting a
mischievous smile.
She too chuckled happily.
“Well, I am gonna
randomly walk around
shooting pics. I have no
special agenda in mind,”
Naman said. “Do you need
me to find you a cab to take
you some place?”
Vidhu hesitated, “Well, I
had no agenda at all.
103
Actually I too had thought of
randomly roaming around
the whole day, taking in
sights and sounds and losing
myself in anonymity.”
“Why don’t you join me
for the day? You know, it
sounds strange, we have just
met, but if you can trust me
enough, we can both go
around this place randomly
shooting and observing.
Your writer’s keen mind will
help me spot good pics to be
shot as well,” Naman looked
expectantly at her.
“And…” Naman drawled
Vidhu looked askance at
him.
“Don’t worry about food.
There’s enough food to feed
an army in my backpack”.
Vidhu burst into laughter at
that and Naman grinned
impishly.
The duo continued
towards the exit in
companionable silence.
Outside, Naman got busy
with his camera. Thankfully,
the rain had abated for a
while, even though the sky
was heavily overcast.
I n the little town of
Chenkalpet, Naman went
wild with his camera,
shooting pics of cycle
rickshaws plying slowly in
the rain, children splashing
themselves in the puddles,
share-cabs plying packed
with passengers and making
their way slowly in the
already flooded streets. He
shot pics of vendors selling
hot cups of tea, coffee, and
spicy bhajjis, crisp samosas,
and masala peanuts.
A remote and less travelled
side-street had a slowly
ambling bullock cart making
its way towards the main
road, and the man inside was
smoking a hookah, and
Naman ‘s camera went crazy
mopping up all these shots.
Vidhu found these
104
interesting and immensely
fascinating as she followed
him around. Nothing seemed
to miss Naman’s keen eye; a
flower blooming amidst a
thicket with rain drops
clinging to it thrilled them
both. A shaft of sunlight
streaming in through the
branches of a tree at noon
time; women clustered
around a stove and gossiping
while cooking fascinated him
and they smiled shyly at him
while he snapped up their pics.
“Whew...!”
Naman and Vidhu
plopped down on a bench in
a wayside park. Vidhu took
out and scribbled fast in her
journal, eager not to miss out
Naman brushed his
request aside with
a smile and wanted
to just shoot pics of
him and his parrot.
The fellow posed for
Naman and he was
even paid for posing
for the pic.
details of this amazing day.
Naman meanwhile fiddled
with his camera.
“I am hungry. I have some
delicious mushroom-fried
rice, pappads and raita. Let’s
tuck in. There’s a lot. Mom
still thinks I am a growing
boy.” Naman unpacked the
lunch bag and they shared
the lovely delicious food
between them. The wintry
skies watched over them and
sent a refreshing breeze on
its way, to cool them and
Vidhu closed her eyes in
absolute contentment.
“Now for a fruit. Catch,”
Naman took out two apples
from his backpack and threw
one at her. Vidhu caught it
deftly and bit into the
succulent fruit.
While they ate, Naman
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
spoke about his family, his
wife, mom, sister – and
Vidhu felt as if she had
known them all along.
A fter a while he lapsed
into silence and said,
“You know something? The
day has turned out fun and
interesting, thanks to you.
Just this morning I was
hoping that something
interesting and out of the
blue would happen and it has!”
“Yes, for me too. If not for
you, I would have taken the
next train back home,”
smiled Vidhu.
They cleared out their
lunch and then strolled down
lazily down random streets.
Near a small temple
under a banyan tree, they
spotted a kili jyotsiar (an
astrologer-cum-palmist with
a parrot to assist him).
Catching sight of them, he
offered to read their palms.
Naman brushed his request
aside with a smile and
wanted to just shoot pics of
him and his parrot. The
fellow posed for Naman and
he was even paid for posing
for the pic.
Then Naman said, “It is
nearly 4.30. Shall we have
some tea and then catch the
train back home?”
“Of course. I need to get
back home before it gets too
dark,” Vidhu agreed.
It started drizzling mildly
and immediately the
pedestrians opened out their
umbrellas. It was a colourful
scenario with lots of
umbrellas of different hues
opening out and Naman
went to work shooting pics.
They made their way to a
cosy tea shop and ordered
hot tea and plates of crisp
masala dosas.
While they ate, Naman
said, ”You know, I am glad I
followed my instincts.“
Vidhu concurred with a
smile. “I too was thinking on
the same lines. If I had
decided to stay at home, I
would have missed out on
this beautiful day.”
“Yes,” Naman smiled. “I
read a lot and a book I had
read recently says that
whatever we ask of the
universe, it provides.”
Vidhu’s eyes twinkled in
amusement. “I guess we
both asked the universe for
some amazing fun and
adventure.”
“Yes! You said it , and we
got it,” Naman guffawed
loudly.
They walked to the
station, got on the train and,
for the rest of the journey
back home, caught up on
discussing books, music, and
friendship and surprisingly
found that their interests
matched.
“All good things come to
an end,” sighed Vidhu as the
train chugged into Chennai.
“Not necessarily. Here’s
my card with my number.
Let’s keep in touch. Thank
you, Universe, for a great
new friend,” smiled Naman
as they shook hands and
parted ways. Vidhu handed
him her card too.
N aman helped her into a
cab and, as she settled
back in it, Vidhu felt as light
as the raindrops falling all
around her, outside.
‘It pays to listen to your
heart, to your instincts,’
Vidhu smiled to herself.
Her mobile tinkled. She
looked down and noticed a
text from Naman. “Thanks
for a beautiful day… and
good things do not have to
end.. It goes on...”
She texted back, “Yes, it
goes on… forever...” We
Thank you for always
being my rainbow after
the storm.
When can I resume sexual intercourse after delivery?
Most women remain disinterested in sex for some months
after birth. The pressing desire on getting into bed during this
time is for sleep! However it is generally accepted that one
can resume sexual intercourse 2-3 weeks after birth. As the
stitches hurt (especially after a normal delivery) it is wiser to
wait till six weeks after delivery when the internal organs have
returned to their original state (our ancestors knew this well
before science told them) and the external stitches have
completely healed. By this time you also have had your first
postnatal check-up after which the doctor usually gives you
the green signal to go ahead. However, the bottom line is that
a couple can resume sex as soon as the woman feels physically
and emotionally ready to do so.
I am in the seventh month of my pregnancy and have
developed slight bleeding from the vagina. Is this normal? Do
I have to visit the doctor for the same?
You should visit the doctor as soon as possible for bleeding
in pregnancy especially at this time. It can be due to placenta
privea or placental abruption both of which are serious
complications of pregnancy.
In placenta privea the placenta is situated lower down and
during painless uterine contractions that occur throughout
pregnancy or after sexual intercourse/internal check-up can
cause bleeding. In placental abruption,
a normally situated placenta comes off
its attachment to the uterus leading
to a collection of blood between the
placenta and uterine wall part of which
may trickle out. In either case you
need an immediate ultrasound and
hospital admission.
I am in the 28th week of my pregnancy and have been
prescribed breathing exercises. Please tell me how to do
them.
Lie on the back with knees bent and feet on the floor,
mouth closed.
✿ Breathe gently in and out, keeping quite loose and letting
the abdominal wall rise with the indrawn breath and drop with
the outgoing one. Practise this every day till you can take half
a minute to draw in and then slowly breathe out.
✿ Breathe in to expand the ribs sideways, opening out the
inverted V of the ribs in front. Again breathe out slowly.
✿ Raise your sternum (breastbone) while breathing in and
lower it while breathing out. Do these exercises daily.
What is an emergency contraception? How is it used?
Emergency contraception is a contraceptive pill that has to
be taken within 72 hours of unprotected sex. Though it is
useful it is not hundred per cent safe. Moreover it cannot be
used on a regular basis but only once in a while.
Why is folic acid tablet given during early pregnancy?
It has been found that a tablet of folic acid helps in the
closure of the canal that contains the brain and spinal cord
thereby preventing defects in the canal through which the
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
brain and spinal cord can protrude leading to neurological
problems. On account of this important role, it is wise to take
a tablet every day for the first three months. Ideally a tablet of
folic acid should be started at least three months prior to
conception and continued during early pregnancy.
Please tell me what are Kegel’s excercises, how they are done
and what are the benefits of doing them?
Kegel’s exercises strengthen the "pelvic floor muscles" –
the muscles that support the various pelvic organs from
below. They also encircle the urinary and rectal sphincters
and help control the act of urination and defecation. The
weight of the growing uterus on the bladder could lead to
incontinence - the leakage of urine especially during straining
– coughing, sneezing, etc.
Kegels exercises help in preventing this embarrassing
situation and also improve the muscle tone and elasticity
which comes handy at the time of delivery.
You can do them anywhere – sitting in your car, chatting
with your friends on the phone, standing in a queque, for they
are not externally visible. To find the correct muscles try
stopping the flow of urine midstream by squeezing
these muscles for a few seconds and relaxing
Q
them. Once you have got the hang of it
A
&
I am
Pregnant
do it when you do not have to urinate
for retention of urine can lead to urinary tract
infection.
Alternatively, place a finger inside your vagina and feel it
tighten when you squeeze. If you are still unsure ask your
doctor to help identify the correct muscles. Do not tighten
other muscles, like those of the stomach and legs with it and
do not hold your breath.
What sort of food should I avoid during pregnancy?
Foods to be avoided in pregnancy include soft
unpasteurised cheese, unpasteurised milk, raw eggs, raw or
undercooked fish (sushi), shellfish and processed meats. These
foods can cause infections like listerosis, toxoplasmosis and
salmonella which in turn can lead to birth defects in the fetus
or miscarriage. Certain fish like tuna, king mackerel may have
high mercury levels that may affect the nervous system of
the baby and are best avoided.
Also, it goes without saying that unhygienic street food
should be avoided. If you contract diarrhoea, besides the
disease process itself, medication can also be a problem. Mild
medicines do not cure the problem and strong ones are
harmful to the pregnancy, so be cautious.
– Dr Amrinder Kaur Bajaj, MD.
105
 I
f I were to ever describe vacations
I would do it like this. Weren’t
those little summer breaks the
part of our lives till the time we grew
up? Being a kid, it was a treat to meet
your cousins and visit new places.
More than a month before our
vacations started we used to make a
list of all the things we wanted to do
in the vacations and which are the
places we’d want to visit.
But unfortunately gone are those
days, and we are stuck in our office
chairs in front of our computers
working like machines and
accomplishing targets. Sometimes, all
of this makes us go weak in our knees.
It’s like a question we put to ourselves
daily: what are we doing and what will
Here is how you end up doing? Our heart and brain
screams out loud, “Enough is enough
can have an and take a break, visit a new place,
add new pages to the book of
amazing one. memories.”
Even after we decide to go on a
By Saumya Shresth minivacation and take leave from our
Trip it ut!
offices, we are unsure about it ending
up perfectly.
So, here are some tips to have a
super-amazing vacation and come
back with reminiscences and
experiences which you could never
forget.
Alone is awesome: You and your
friends are planning a trip for long,
maybe from the college days itself.
But some or the other person is
always busy with their schedule and
that plan never turns into reality. So
it’s time you pack your bags and go on
a solo trip. Solo trips make you feel
the presence of your soul, you can
connect with your own self.
Experiment with whatever you want
to, and try many new things which
were inhibiting you till now due to the
discomfort of being judged by
someone else’s wish. Maybe, just go
to a beach somewhere in Goa and
flaunt your summer body without the
tension of being judged by anyone.

SOMETIMES WE JUST When your passion calls:
MOVE PAST THE Remember the one or two things you
always wanted to do since you were a
THOUGHT OF TAKING A child, but never did? You just kept
VACATION BECAUSE WE preparing a wish list. It’s time to strike
a few things off that list because you
CANNOT AFFORD TO. are going to do them now. Stop
pushing away your passion. Yesterday
BUT WE ARE HIGHLY you were a kid, today you’re the youth
MISTAKEN. IT’S INDIA and tomorrow you’ll be someone with
family responsibilities. Today is the
AND OUT OF MANY time you do what you love – take a
THINGS WE EXPERIENCE break and learn river rafting, sky
diving or just anything that gives you
HERE, INEXPENSIVE goosebumps and excites you from the
TRIPS ARE THE BEST core.
ONES. Make travel buddies: You finally
decide to head out on a trip alone and
start to feel uneasy and bored. You
curse yourself and think it was the
worst idea. Well, you are wrong. We
humans have got a great gift of
reciprocating. Make some new friends
while travelling, you might end up
with people who share the same
interests you do. Such bonds are
amazing and you learn something
new from people while travelling and,
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
since you are meeting them for the
first time, you can find many topics to
talk as you, share your experiences
with each other.
Challenge yourself: Not many of us
would want to do something extreme
on a vacation because we are actually
scared to try something new. Well,
guess it’s time to change some
notions and experiment with your
fears and overcome them. Once you
do something that you least expect
to, it leaves you with relief and new
confidence. And you might get to
know another completely different
side of yourself.
Say goodbye to your work: Yes, it’s
very bad to think about your work all
the time. You might be an ambitious
hard-working person but thinking only
about your work 24x7 not only takes
away the essence of your vacation but
also irritates the people around you.
Make sure you enjoy every moment to
the fullest. After all, vacations are
meant to give you a healthy break and
not fill you with stress. So, take a chill
pill and have fun.
A pocket-friendly trip: Sometimes
we just move past the thought of
taking a vacation because we cannot
afford to. But we are highly mistaken.
It’s India and out of many things we
experience here, inexpensive trips are
the best ones. We have many places
that are historic, beautiful, less known
and very cheap to visit. Some of these
places include Spiti located in
Himachal Pradesh famously known as
mini-Tibet or Gokarna in Karnataka
known for its pristine beaches. So, do
some research and pack your bags.
By following these easy steps you
can have an amazing and
unforgettable trip. Also, precaution is
better than cure. So, do not indulge in
harmful activities during your
rejuvenating break. We
“Courage is the first of human
qualities because it is the quality
which guarantees all others.”
107

Kupwara
Bandipore
Srinagar
Baramula
Pulwama
Anantnag
Punch
Rajauri
Patnitop
Alluring
Udhampur
Patnitop
Jammu
Kathua
The Himalayan high. By Richa Hegde
P
atnitop is one among the
enthralling hill stations known
for its picturesque surroundings
in the Udhampur district of Jammu
and Kashmir. It is situated on the
National Highway 1A on the way from
Udhampur to Srinagar, at a distance
of 112 km from Jammu.
Patnitop is blessed with the scenic
splendour of the misty mountain
peaks, the dense woods, the snow
belts, the rolling meadows, the
meandering Chenab River that flows
close to its proximity and dazzling
locales.
108
Jammu and Kashmir
Kargil
Kishwar
Doda
The best way to know Patnitop is
by walking on its quiet roads amidst
the alpine atmosphere. One can enjoy
oneself in the warm glow of the
bonfires during nights and feel the
cool weather amidst the scented
mountain breeze!
Patnitop provides captivating
views of the nearby areas. It is
situated on a flat top in the Shivalik
Himalayan belt. Patnitop originated
from the distortion of the original
name Patna Da Talab which generally
means Pond of the Princess.
Its inhabitants – their culture and
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
traditions – are a beautiful element in
this wonderfully scenic and
untouched mountain area.
The first place that captured our
attention was Sanasar, a spot near
Patnitop at an altitude of 2,050 m. In
Jammu province, there are two
villages, Sana and Sar, and the name
of Sanasar is derived by combining
their names. It is a cup-shaped
meadow surrounded by gigantic
conifers and a place for a quiet
holiday. It provides a splendid view of
the lower Shivalik range. The best
time to visit this locale is between
May and June and during the months
of September and October. While
visiting Sanasar one should especially
not miss wilderness adventure camps,
Shank Pal temple, tandem
paragliding, joyrides, rock climbing,
trekking trails and the kund.
Here at Patnitop, the nature walks
lead to pockets where time stands
still and calm prevails. One can
encounter breathtaking landscapes
and indulge in scenic purity through
nature trails of misty mountains and
deep ravines.
Madhatop is a radiant valley of
Jammu. Located at an elevation of
2,024 m, Madhatop is easily accessible
by road and is a five km trek from
Patnitop. It is a great getaway for
trekkers, honeymooners and winter
sport aficionados.
Besides this, Nathatop also offers a
wide and spectacular view of snow-
covered hills. Known for adventure
activities, it plays host to paragliding.
Flying from Nathatop is an experience
often described as a walk through the
skies and clouds.
KUD PARK
Amidst the dense forests, the Kud
Park enchants the visitors with its
mystic feel. One can encounter
different varieties of flowers in
profusion here. Especially during the
spring season, flowers sprout
everywhere in rainbow colours and
branches of trees stoop with ripened
fruits.
Patnitop can be visited any time
throughout the year. Summer is
beautiful with enchanting views,
while the winter months are marked
by a number of skiing courses and set-
ups . Providing the most gentle and
modest slopes, Patnitop tends to be
an ideal destination for skiing for
people with no prior experience.
Billoo ki Powri, a staircase of
270 steps, is also famous here. It
is chiselled out of the mountain
and falls in the town of
Dawariyan.
The Naag temple, constructed
600 years back, is the most
popular here. During the Naag
Panchmi festival, it sees
hundreds of devotees who
throng this temple to pay respects to
the snake king, cobra.
Besides this, the Sudh Mahadev
BESIDES THIS, NATHATOP
ALSO OFFERS A WIDE
AND SPECTACULAR VIEW
OF SNOW- COVERED
HILLS. KNOWN FOR
ADVENTURE ACTIVITIES,
IT PLAYS HOST TO
PARAGLIDING. FLYING
FROM NATHATOP IS AN
EXPERIENCE OFTEN
DESCRIBED AS A WALK
THROUGH THE SKIES AND
CLOUDS.
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
temple built 80 years ago, is also
renowned. It is made on the spot
where a Shiva devotee was
accidentally killed by his trishul, while
he was trying to protect his consort,
Parvati.
The two festivals celebrated here
with great enthusiasm are Naag
Panchmi and Lohri.
Lohri in Patnitop is popularly
known as Makar Sankranti. This
festival symbolises joy, happiness and
delight. The remarkable feature is
that young boys of the town visit
elders and then move around in the
town in colourful sequence and
symbolise the Chhajja dance. Patnitop
is also famous for its Kashmiri
handicrafts and the pashmina shawl. We
Discipline is the bridge between
goals and accomplishment.
109
I
hung upside down, at a height of
88 metres, my legs tied together
with weights on each ankle. My
hands hung down straight, loose and
flailing, and my body swayed in
rhythmic fashion as I tried to come
back to my senses from this super
thrilling state of trance that I felt. Not
to forget the feeling of every negative
ounce in my body flowing out and
away from me! Ah, that feeling is
inexplicable but nevertheless one that
doesn't escape my heart every time I
think about it.
No, I had not been pushed nor had
I been forced. It was a bungee jump,
BUNGEE
JUMPING
Up in the air, down in the Ganges.
By Devyani
done out of my own free will, to quiet
my quest for some heroic escapade.
Having been on the lower side of my
sanity since some months, with a
pregnancy and birth of my second
baby, in a new city, that I never grew
to like or get accustomed to, and
hence moving back to Mumbai and
settling down again, low on energy
and spirit, when the opportunity for a
two-day break came as a suggestion
from my friend and turned into an
experience of a lifetime. Never to be
forgotten, and always cherished.
So, well, nothing comes easy in
life. Not even holidays. In the midst of
raised eyebrows and some petty
judgements, I decided to take the
break with my friend. My daughter
being five at the time and my son was
eight months precisely. "Oh how can
you leave them and go?” The best one
came from my mother-in-law "Beta,
how and when did you become so
strong, so as to leave your children
behind?” But who was to explain to
anyone that it wasn't the strength
that drove me but the desire to
salvage the last bit of sanity that was
remaining in me. I had to go for
myself and be by myself. So with my
children settled and comfortable with
my parents, I took off, with nothing
but one bagpack on my back and a
spring in my step. The rugged jeans
and old t-shirt I wore had never felt
better, giving me a certain sense of
freedom and youth that was lost
somewhere along the way.
Our chosen destination was
Rishikesh. The thought of a bungee
jump had kept us awake and excited
all through our journey to Delhi, from
where we were to be joined by a
friend who would drive us to our
camp site at Rishikesh. After beating
the unbearable Delhi traffic we hit NH
58, as clear skies and open fields
enthralled the horizon ahead. With
winter just setting in, there was a
slight nip in the air, and a comfortable
enjoyable breeze beckoned. The drive
was to last a good 7-8 hours and,
though tired, the eyes refused to blink
let alone rest in a nap.
THE ETHEREAL WAY
A nonstop banter continued in the
car as we were briefed about the
small towns we passed through, the
myriad plantations of the area and its
people. The sight of hoards of guava
vendors titillated our taste buds and
Bahadur Singh, our driver, pulled over
on a side street, ran across and
grabbed the freshly cut fruit sprinkled
with salt and handed it to us quickly
over the rolled down window. Also,
with a warning that we were not to
stop any more as dusk had already
fallen and we had quite a few miles to
cover for Rishikesh. Upon touching
Haridwar, which is about an hour
before Rishikesh, a sense of calm had
gripped us all. With thick jungles on
either side of the road, our car
manoeuvred ahead at full speed,
finally halting in front of Camp Sahaja
Retreat, Rishikesh.
Nestled in the heart of scenic
landscape, Camp Sahaja Retreat in the
woodlands of Rishikesh seemed to me
the perfect abode for the next two
days. A backdrop of high-peaked
mountains with changing hues every
hour, the gush of the river flow with
its soothing sound and chirpy birds
tattling their own tales were a few of
the many things that were going to
A BACKDROP OF HIGH-
PEAKED MOUNTAINS
WITH CHANGING HUES
EVERY HOUR, THE GUSH
OF THE RIVER FLOW
WITH ITS SOOTHING
SOUND AND CHIRPY
BIRDS TATTLING THEIR
OWN TALES WERE A FEW
OF THE MANY THINGS
THAT WERE GOING TO
REST AND HEAL MY
MIND IN MY COUNTED
HOURS OF STAY THERE.
rest and heal my mind in my counted
hours of stay there. Cosy tents on the
banks of the river, and a bright
bonfire sat awaiting our arrival, as my
friend and I bounced back and forth in
girlish delight crossing the small
wooden plank over a river that
separated the camp from the road.
Famished as we were after a long
journey, we sat having the sumptuous
meal laid out for us around the fire,
warming up a little and exchanging
pleasantries with our fellow camp
companions. The look of surprise and
amazement on people there when
they realised two lone mothers had
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
reached half way across the country in
search of some adventure was
priceless. No denying that it felt good.
It felt good having a meal far away in
the mountains in peace. The quiet felt
good. The lack of pressure on the
mind constantly that something
needed to be done felt good. I felt
happy. I felt peace. The feeling is so
palpable, clear and vivid, it felt like I
could literally touch that abstract
feeling. The night pulled along and we
finally sunk into bed inside our tent
with nothing but a flashlight and an
old fashioned lantern. The next
morning was to be a big day. Our big
jump of life peered at us through the
other side of the night.
Waking up to a beautiful morning
in the mountains, we set about
preparing ourselves, mentally more
than anything else for the bungee
jump. Our smiles betraying the traces
of nervousness felt inside. We had
come a long way for this. We were
brave and strong. And we had to live
up to that. With a deep breath and
sneakers in place, we boarded the
"Van of Jumpers"! Everyone sat with
sombre faces and I wondered why ! I
wanted to shout at them, like guys
111

please at least smile, for the sake of
your impending experience, who
knows what's it going to teach you
and how it's going to make you feel!”
But anyway, with my excitement in
my pocket I sat down waiting to reach
the cliff. We stood in a queue
watching the huge hoardings and
pictures of the cliff and those
displaying photographs of various
bungee-jumping episodes. A live video
of the fall played on a huge screen
nearby. A chill ran through my spine
really. With my acrophobia hidden
inside my belly, I calmed myself
chanting the " I can do it" mantra all
along. Making your emotions public,
and that too fear? No way, I couldn't
let that happen. I pulled myself
together and signed the indemnity
form that my friend handed over to
me. We looked at each other, each
giving a reassuring smile to the other.
With all the formalities done, we were
on our way to the cliff edge, where
the entire bungee set-up was
maintained.
As luck would have it, I happened
to be the first woman jumper of the
day! I smiled and waved at my friend,
displaying a confidence that I didn't
112
really feel inside. With every step I
took towards the plank from where I
was to jump, I felt my knees going
weaker and giving way. And then, I
heard a "Hello there", not a familiar
accent for sure. I looked up facing a
foreigner who was in charge that day.
In no time, he made me feel at ease,
asking me silly questions and adding
humour to the situation. I was made
to sit down there for a little briefing
and then wear the harness and the
weights on my ankles with feet tied
together. All set now, the men there
cheered and thumbs upped at me.
With dragging feet I was taken on the
edge, and made to stand with my
hands on the side like the wings on a
bird. The man next to me said, "I will
count till three, madam, and I will not
push you, you have to take the plunge
yourself.” Now, there was no time to
back off even if I wanted to. I licked
my lips and simply looked ahead
instead of down, just the way I was
instructed to. And then, A One, A Two
and A Three, they shouted,
“JUMMPPPP!”
In no time it was over. I took the
plunge and flew like a bird, shouting
half in delight and some in fear, as I
went into the air turning upside down
finally and hanging in loose, face
down, my arms no more like a bird's
but free flowing. My eyes flew open
as I felt my body swaying pendulum
style and I looked up from where it
had all started. Muffled voices of
everyone who stood there cheering
and shouting filled my ears. For a
while, I was in a different world, I
didn't want to look at anyone or hear
IN NO TIME IT WAS OVER. I
TOOK THE PLUNGE AND
FLEW LIKE A BIRD,
SHOUTING HALF IN
DELIGHT AND SOME IN
FEAR, AS I WENT INTO THE
AIR TURNING UPSIDE
DOWN FINALLY AND
HANGING IN LOOSE, FACE
DOWN, MY ARMS NO MORE
LIKE A BIRD'S BUT FREE
FLOWING.
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
anything. I wanted the feeling of
numbness that had come over me to
remain forever.
But obviously, that was not meant
to be! Down below another gang of
receivers waited. As my rope went
lower and lower I saw the riverbed
and a long stick coming towards me
asking me to hold it. I stretched out
my hand for it and got pulled down
below and made to lie flat on my back
to regain my lost senses and the
worldly balance. A small batch with a
"I've Got Guts" painted on it was
primly pinned on my T-shirt. I was
exuberant. I mean I had guts all right!
Next after me was a girl who I
could see was taking a lot of time and
coaxing from the instructors.
However, I saw her shaking her head
and giving up and walking back. My
heart sank. For my friend was still up
and I had no idea what was going to
happen. But in the next two minutes I
saw her jump and sway in the air too,
all my anxiety fading away now. Our
mission was accomplished.
ENCHANTING
EXPERIENCE
Yes, we were two lone mothers,
far from home, and happy after a soul-
stirring experience. The way back, we
decided to walk downhill instead of
the bus ride. We had the entire day to
ourselves before heading back to
Mumbai the next day. Our minds were
racing. What next to do to fill up the
hours? First and foremost, we had to
fill our empty stomachs which were
kept empty in preparation and
anticipation of the fall. At a humble
tea shop, we saw a blackboard
chalked with a meal of dal-rice and
some “pahadi pickle" at `50 per plate.
On the roadside, we sat on a wooden
bench and enjoyed a hearty delicious
home-cooked meal and then walked
along.
We were in Rishikesh, a holy place,
thronged with tourists who come
from all over for pilgrimage. Neither
of us being overtly religious decided
to skip the temple bit. But without a
dip in the Ganges, our trip would
remain incomplete, said our camp
manager. That's where our rafting
encounter took place. We didn't
have a lot of time and hence opted
for a short-distance rafting which
would take us about 45 minutes into
the ripples of the Ganges. Two of us
along with a young boy who was to
be our rafting guide embodied our
tiny raft. With oars in hand we
followed him, as he gave us
instructions on what to do when
and what not to do.
The current not being too
strong, we moved on comfortably,
our oars moving to and fro, trying to
keep pace with the boy and
matching his movements. Every
now and then he stopped the raft
and let it follow the river’s currents,
and allowed us to get out into the
chilly water holding onto a rope
attached to the raft, so as to
prevent us from flowing away with
the ripples !
Not to forget that there are
"noodle joints" every few metres
along the Ganges, where rafters can
take a halt for a quick bite of
noodles and regain their lost
energies. Rafting in the Ganges is,
by far, one of a kind experience. If
not rafting, just to be by the Ganges
and enjoy its peaceful ambience,
especially once dusk sets in and the
priests come out to chant mantras
and light holy fires, is a sight to
behold.
Calm and sated, we had given
some meaning to the saying "All in a
Day's Work". With all our energies
coupled with the limited time we
had, we explored what we could in
this little city. It was past seven in
the evening and we had to rush
back to the camp to pack our few
things and get some rest before
travelling for the next day. The last
few hours of our adventure were
left, and we had become suddenly
quiet. In the rush of all our
activities, there had not been a
moment to sit and ponder over our
experiences of the last few hours.We
“Don’t worry about failures, worry
about the chances you miss when
you don’t even try.”
Not a woman!
I was then heading the
department of mass communication,
Punjab University, Chandigarh.
One day, as I went up the stairs to
reach the department, located on the
second floor of the Arts Block 2, I saw
a thin young lady staring at my
nameplate outside my office.
I went in, collected my register
and papers, and came out to go to
the lecture theatre. The young lady
was still standing there, her gaze
fixed on the nameplate.
Curiosity, got the better of me,
and I ventured to ask, “Excuse me,
do you want to meet someone here?”
She lowered her gaze and said, “Is
this I.M. Soni the same whose articles
appear in Woman’s Era?”
“Yes,” I responded.
“Can I meet ‘her’?”
It was my turn to lower my eyes!
“I am standing before you.”
“Oh no! All these years I have
been under the impression that I.M.
Soni was a woman!”
– I.M. Soni, Chandigarh.
The whole world loves a lover
While commuting by 9 am local
train to office daily, I had been
watching a beautiful young girl and a
young man exchanging radiant smiles
with their eyes meeting in an
unspoken connection daily for the
past two years. Though drawn to
each other, surprisingly they were
hesitant to open up. Even though
they alight at the same railway
station to go to their college daily,
they have never spoken while
travelling in the train. Their silence
urged me to know the truth. Later, I
ascertained that as they belong to
different caste, they fear, their
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
families would never agree to their
marriage. Hearing this I felt sad and
dumbstruck. A few months later, one
day, while returning from office, I
saw both of them engrossed in
animated conversation but at the
same time deeply worked up, sitting
at the railway station where they
alight every day in the morning. This
time, I could not ignore them. I
immediately alighted from the train
and walked towards them. Seeing me
coming near them, both were taken
aback. However, mustering courage
the young man told me that he got a
job in an in-campus interview and
posted in another city and therefore
was deeply worried to part from her.
He further said that he came to meet
her to say goodbye before leaving
the city. He then came out with his
feelings for her and reitenated that
he would not be able to marry
anyone else except this girl who is
studying in the same college and a
year junior to him. I turned my eyes
towards her and in reply she affirmed
that she also loves him dearly. I then
asked both as to what is stopping
them from taking an initiative to tell
their parents, and go ahead with
marriage.
Both remained silent. After a few
minutes despite consumed with
sadness both simultaneously replied
“Shall wait till the last breath,”
turning philosophical. Though it
sounded odd their bitter sweet
parting moved me to tears, but I
promised them to meet their parents
separately and convince them. The
following day, I met their parents and
explained at length to their sincere
love and vow to get married. After
enduring a few anxious days, both
families relented finally and agreed
for the marriage.
Thereafter both got married in a
civil ceremony followed by a joyous
wedding reception, which I attended.
While handing over a gift, asked them
as to how they feel now. Both
smilingly replied simultaneously
“Love is a beautiful thing and despite
obstacles triumphs at last.”
– R. Srinivasan, Secunderabad.
113
 Say
YES
W
eight-loss is one of the most
discussed topics in today’s
world where there are
‘ideal’ body standards which need to
be met before you consider yourself
good looking. It also has a huge
impact on one’s self-esteem to be in
that defined shape.
People try to lose weight either by
curbing their eating habits or
exercising to tone their bodies. But
what exactly is losing weight? And
how can one do it in the right way
which doesn’t cause any harm in the
long run?
Losing weight is a phrase often
used in place of losing fat. This
process of losing weight could be
both intentional as well as
unintentional (which are caused due
to some kind of a body deficiency or
imbalance). There are several reasons
for losing weight which can range
from having a hormonal imbalance to
having a slower metabolism.
Loss of fat usually takes place
when the calorie intake is insufficient
114
and the body starts using an alternate
source inside it which often happens
to be the fat. Sometimes the body can
also lean in to burn the muscle tissue
which can be harmful in the long run
and hence should be taken care of.
In terms of intentional weight-loss,
weight-loss can be done in several
ways, but the most preferred way is
to have a low-calorie diet combined
with systematic physical exercise.
to
weight-
And build a better life.
There are crash courses too, which
promise to work on body fat within a
fixed time-frame but it has a high
probability of having adverse effects
in the long run.
There are several benefits of losing
weight that can help a person lead a
healthier life. Here are some of those
benefits which are convincing enough
to lose weight.
Increase in energy
This is the first benefit that is felt
and it is a significant difference that
one feels instantly. This is basically
felt due to the absence of the extra
pounds that a person previously used
to carry. Increase in energy can make
a person feel fresh for a longer
duration and the person feels less
tired than before.
Reduced chances of cancer
There are several causes of cancer
and obesity is one amongst those
reasons. Loss of just 5 per cent of
one’s body weight can reduce the
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
chances of inflammation in one’s
body. This will help to immunise
system as well which results in
fighting other chronic diseases other
than cancer like strokes, metabolic
syndromes and heart problems.
Less expenditure on medication
If a person is obese and is suffering
from problems like diabetes or heart
diseases, then losing weight can have
Loss
By Sanjana Saini
a significant effect on his or her health
and help in decreasing the chances of
these problems which means that the
expenditure on medicines and visits
to the clinic will also decrease.
Increase in self-confidence
Having a toned body definitely
boosts a person’s morale and helps
the person perform and participate
better in life. A study which was
conducted in 2009 shows that losing
up to just 10 per cent of your body
weight can make a huge difference in
the physical aspect as well as your
self-esteem.
Enhance your mood
Losing weight can play a crucial
role in uplifting one’s mood by
inducing the tendency to sleep more
and thus improving the mood within a
duration of just six months. Sleeping
an adequate amount of time for the
right hours can help tackle the
problems of hormonal imbalance and
thus mood swings. We
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RAIN-SOAKED
APPLIANCES?
How to take care of your gadgets in the monsoon. By Pushpa Bhatia
Have you ever noticed that your gadgets or any
electronic device starts misbehaving in the
monsoon? This is because the amount of
moisture in the air during the monsoon is on the
higher side. Excessive moisture can jam or
damage your appliances and you can also face
problems like fungal growth.
Thus it becomes important to ensure that all
your electronic appliances are taken care of
when it pours.
118 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
Unplug them during the monsoon:
Sudden power cuts are quite normal
in this season. This can damage your
appliances. So it is recommended that
you unplug them during showers. At
the same time, avoid keeping
electronic appliances on the floor
during the monsoon.
Frequently clean the appliances:
Cleaning your appliances with a dry
cloth during the monsoon prevents
fungal growth and rusting.
Ensure proper grounding for
appliances and electrical goods:
Ensure all your heavy power
consuming electronic appliances such
as refrigerator, ACs, microwave, etc
are properly grounded with three-pin
plugs. Proper grounding ensures that
the appliances are undamaged by
high power static currents caused by
lighting.
Keep them running: Excessive
moisture can jam or damage your
appliances if they remain unused for
too long. Make sure you use them
once or twice a week to keep them up
and running. Even if you are keeping
some devices packed and closed,
unpack and run them for a while. It is
similar to stroking your cars.
Keep appliances away from damp
walls and corners: There is every
possibility of seepage or a damp wall
in your home during the monsoon. It
can cause a lot of damage to your
assets. Don’t leave appliances near
damp walls and wet floors. Get them
fixed by experts. There are services
available online.
Get post-monsoon servicing of the
goods: The monsoon season takes a
toll on your machines. Heavy-duty
appliances need servicing after the
monsoon is over for them to work
economically and stay in good
condition. If you feel that your device
is not working properly, then don’t
waste time and take it for service
immediately.
AVOID CHARGING OR
CONNECTING THE
PHONE OR LAPTOP TO
ELECTRIC POINTS FOR
CHARGING WHEN YOU
JUST COME BACK
FROM THE
RAINS WITH
THE GADGET.
Buy waterproof cases for your
gadgets: Investing in something that’s
robust, even though it might be on
the slightly expensive side and add to
the weight and thickness of your
appliances but it can help prevent any
damage to your inseparable device.
Nowadays there are many stylish
covers and cases available in the
market or online. Some of these cases
also come with armbands and neck
straps, making the devices easy to
carry. As a makeshift solution, keep
plastic bags or envelops – that come
with delivery packages in your
backpack for the rainy season.
Ensure that the charging parts are
thoroughly dry: You should avoid
charging or connecting the phone or
laptop to electric points for charging
when you just come back from the
rains with the gadget. There is a
strong possibility for the gadget to
have gathered moisture. One has to
ensure that the charging parts are
thoroughly dry before connecting the
gadget to a power source. Keeping
silicon pouches in the bags that one
uses for carrying laptop really help.
Use a Bluetooth headset: It’s
advisable to use a Bluetooth headset
to talk to avoid spillage when using
your phone in the rainy season.
How to save soaked water-logged
phone: So, what if you took all
possible precautions and the water
still manages to get to the internals of
your phone? Well worry not. Just take
the following steps carefully and
immediately.
✿ Turn it off – Remove the battery
SIM card and micro SD card-
✿ Let it dry – Never use a moistened
or a dunked phone without making
sure that its internals are
completely dry.
✿ One of the most popular methods
is putting the phone in a box full of
uncooked rice for a night. The rice
will absorb all the moisture over
the night.
✿ If you can’t do any of the above
things then it would best if you
place the phone (with battery and
cards removed) in the bright for a
couple of hours.
✿ If you are unsure of whether your
phone has completely dried or not,
it would be best if you take it to
the customer – care centre for
detailed water – lodgment
inspection and necessary repairs.We
It is hard enough to remember my
opinions, without also remembering
my reasons for them!

– Medha Chawla.
Shraddha Kapoor to star opposite
Prabhas in Saaho
S
peculations revolving around the
leading lady of Prabhas starrer
Saaho have finally rested with
Shraddha Kapoor being announced as
the final choice. The Aashiqui 2 actress
will share the screen space with
Prabhas in his next multilingual film,
Saaho.
Prabhas has become a household
name across India post the success of
Earlier, Prabhas' Baahubali muse
Anushka Shetty was being roped in for
the role, but she was allegedly rejected
for being overweight.
Saaho is a hi-tech action drama and
is being simultaneously shot in three
languages - Hindi, Tamil and Telugu.
Saaho’s music will be composed by
Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy and the lyrics are
written by Amitabh Bhattacharya. The
movie also stars Neil Nitin Mukesh,
who plays the role of antagonist in the
film.
Shraddha Kapoor will co-star with
Prabhas in Saaho.
SS Rajamouli's magnumopus Baahubali
and will romance Shraddha in Saaho.
Expressing the excitement to zero in
Shraddha opposite Prabhas, the
producers of the film said, "Shraddha is
absolutely the perfect choice for the
role. We are very excited to have her
on board with us.”
Saaho is Prabhas’s first film being
shot in Hindi and so it’s very special for
all of us. It is a highly ambitious project
and there will be some really high-
octane action scenes in the film,” they
further added.
Pahlaj Nihalani sacked; Prasoon Joshi appointed as the new CBFC chief!
F
amous lyricist Prasoon Joshi has been appointed as the new chief of Central
Board of Film Certification (CBFC) after Pahlaj Nihalani was sacked from the
position. Nihalani's two and a half year term was embroiled in controversies
regarding the demands for multiple cuts in films like Udta Punjab, Lipstick Under
My Burkha', and recently Babumoshai Bandookbaaz. The board headed by Nihalani
had ordered 89 cuts and asked the producers to remove references to Punjab,
elections and political parties in the film Udta Punjab.
Nihalani is replaced by 45-year-old writer and advertising genius Prasoon Joshi.
He is well-known in the Hindi film industry and is famous for his notable work in
several films. He has written lyrics and dialogues for movies like Delhi 6, Rang De
Basanti and Bhaag Milkha Bhaag. Iconic songs like Maa from Taare Zameen Par,
Chaand Sifarish from Fanaa, Zinda from Bhaag Milkha Bhaag are outcome of his
pen. The entire film industry and film enthusiasts are all praises for the transition
in the board. Contrary to Nihalani's conservative approach, Prasoon is a liberal
head and is being hailed as the perfect choice for the eminent position.
Pahlaj Nihalani has been replaced by Prasoon Joshi as CBFC chief.
Esha Gupta breaks Internet with sizzling pictures

T
ha Jannat-2 actress Esha Gupta recently blazed the Internet with her super-
hot pictures that she incessantly posted on Instagram. The diva initially
posted photographs donning lingerie, seemingly from a top- notch brand.
The pictures received quite a backlash via comments from her fans, but the actress
remained unperturbed with the hate.
The actress gave a befitting reply to haters and continued posting sizzling
photographs on her Instagram, but avoided receiving crticism by restricting the Bold Esha
comments section. Taking her photo game to next level, she posted a series of Gupta posts
some nude pictures as well. her sizzling
The actress was also slut-shamed for posting such pictures and opened up pictures on
about the same in a recent interview. The women, who wrote that negative stuff the Internet.
had a problem because they don’t have the confidence which I have and the men
had issues because their manhood was shaken as they saw an Indian girl being
bold. But that didn’t trouble me because it showed who they are than who I am,"
she said. She further blamed insecurity for men and women who posted nasty
comments on her photos. She thinks the idea of "Indian girl being bold" for
women is too much for men to handle.

Riya Sen gets married in a hush-hush Best remembered for her Hindi films
wedding like Style, Jhankaar Beats and Apna

V
eteran actress' Moon Moon
Sen's daughter recently got
married to her long-time
boyfriend Shivam Tiwari. Riya and
Shivam tied the knot in a hush-hush
ceremony in Pune on 16th August. The
wedding was a very personal affair
with only selective family and friends in
attendance.
Riya’s sister, Raima Sen, shared
pictures of the wedding on social
media. Riya looked stunning as a
Bengali bride in a red sari and her
husband was also seen dressed in a
Sapna Money Money, Riya hasn’t
recently been seen of late in Bollywood
films though she has worked in a
number of Bengali films such as
Noukadubi and Jaatishwar. She was last
seen in Agnidev Chatterjee’s Bengali
film Dark Chocolate where her
character was loosely based on Sheena
Bora.
We wish the newly-wed couple a
very happy married life.
Shah Rukh Khan meets ill Dilip Kumar;
photos go viral

T
traditional topor. he legendary actor Dilip Kumar
was recently admitted in a
hospital. His health became a
matter of concern for his fans and
family who prayed day and night for his
speedy recovery.
Among many others, his ‘mooh-bola
beta’, Shah Rukh Khan visited the 94-
year-old veteran actor at his residence
after he got discharged from the
hospital.
Saira Banu, Dilip Kumar's wife
shared the pictures of SRK's visit on
social media and Twitter. King Khan's
affection for Dilip Kumar was very
much evident in the pictures. SRK also
planted a soft kiss on the forehead of
the iconic actor who has been dealing
Riya Sen got married to her
boyfriend Shivam Tiwari.
Shah Rukh Khan visited ailing
Dilip Kumar at his residene.
with health complications for a long
time now.
Sharing the photos, Saira Banu
wrote, “Message from Saira Banu:
Sahab’s mooh-bola beta-“son”
@iamsrk visited Sahab today. Sharing
some photos of the evening.” Also, the
actor updated the fans of Dilip Kumar
about his health as he tweeted, “2/
@iamsrk visited Sahab this evening.
Sahab’s doing much better since return
from the hospital. Shukar Allah.”
Though in the photos, the Ram Aur
Shyam actor still seems under the
weather. We

Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017 121

 u m o ur
H
Say ‘Cheese’!
smile Please It’s not funny! By Vijai Pant
T
hat’s him!” they would
exclaim, with not
more than a casual
glance, while pointing at me
in the group photograph.
Now, I do not have a very
striking personality or a
photogenic face which would
Having no stand out in a crowd. So,
option, I agreed, what is it which would make
though people, even nodding
acquaintances, find me out
unwillingly, as amidst hordes of cheerful,
the thought of smiling faces? Well, I would
being ridiculed be the odd one out. Actually,
when the photographer
by my friends
would shout, “Say cheese”,
came to me. The with everyone grinning from
dental brace was ear to ear, I would continue
made and worn. to have a poker face, looking
sternly at the lens, as if
But fate had daring the lensman to make
some other me fall in line. So, you see,
designs in store. you need not even know me
to pick me out, whether in
real life or in snaps. My
strict demeanour would
give me away.
Early in my
childhood years
when the first
signs of
indiscipline
appeared in my top
row incisors, my
parents forcibly
took me to a
dentist where,
giving me all the
more scare, were
people half
sprawled on the
hydraulic dental
chairs, with their
mouths wide open in
varying degrees of
distress and pain. Of
course, I was too
young to then come to the
conclusion that ‘Death’ may
be called the great leveller,
but in ‘Life’ perhaps there
can be no better leveller than
the orthodontist’s chamber,
with the doctor and his team
peering and working at their
patients’ gaping caverns.
The polite and friendly
dentist, after impressing my
parents with some complex
medical terms, suggested a
Find
me out amidst
hordes of cheerful,
smiling faces? Well, I
would be the odd one out.
Actually, when the
photographer would
shout, “Say
cheese.”
simple brace for me.
Cosmetic and aesthetic
dentistry were quite unheard
of then. Having no option, I
agreed, though unwillingly,
as the thought of being
ridiculed by my friends came
to me. The dental brace was
made and worn. But fate had
some other designs in store.
A month or two later the wire
broke. Consequently, the
front elevation stayed
merrily where it was.
A
lways open to
suggestions on the ways
to improve my face value, I
remember my first lessons in
oral hygiene. During my
school days a well-known
dentist of the area visited our
school and addressed the
morning assembly. He
demonstrated to us the right
manner to brush our teeth,
stressing the importance
of sparkling teeth for
an irresistible
smile. I took his
lessons to heart,
despite being
acutely
aware of
my
protruding
incisors.
Next
morning I brushed
my teeth both
clockwise and anti-
clockwise in slow
mo, not paying any
heed to the ticking
of the clock. I
followed it with
gargles umpteen
times, exactly as he had
wanted. Finally, when I
emerged from the
washroom, I felt
momentarily confident to
dazzle the world with my
‘whites’. Unfortunately, the
world had moved on, leaving
me behind. I missed my
Instead of understanding my
predicament, people think
that I give myself airs.
There are others who label
me as morose, dull,
uninteresting, party-pooper
and what not.
the technological
advancements now and
smile-enhancing techniques,
but then I’ve just completed
explaining to my students
Ogden Nash’s poem, “This is
going to hurt just a little bit”.
Consequently, my childhood
courage and get a
‘cultivated’ smile, you
readers please bear with me,
if I do not effortlessly burst
into a smile at your jokes. It,
definitely, does not mean
that I don’t enjoy them. We

school bus.
Despite my best efforts to
the contrary, I have now
grown up into a stern looking
man. At the most, one can
get the faintest of a smile
from me, even when the
occasion demands loud,
uninhibited laughter.
Sometimes, the suppressed
smile would appear like a
smirk, offending others.
O
n the flip side, my
unwillingness to smile
has contributed to my being
called a ‘no nonsense’
teacher by my students and
helped me in controlling
even the most rowdy ones.
However, to be honest, I also
want to smile and be the
proud possessor of a
‘pleasing visage’.
Of course, I know about
fears have again been For every minute you
stirred. are angry you lose sixty
So, by the time I gather seconds of happiness.
Manufacturers, service providers and
publishers can send details
for showcasing their
products in the magazine and
on our website
www.womansera.com to:
Features@womansera.com

Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017 123

 Shryort
Sto
Padma The fearless tigress. By Ashok Patwari
L
ast night’s storm was a
terrible experience for
Bakhtiar Singh but the
showers which followed gave
a much-desired relief to
everybody in and around the
tiger reserve, more so in the
small villages around the
Suddenly all the
reserve. With mercury
touching more than 48o
everybody in the village was
events of almost panting to cool down
their body temperature. A
yesterday and the shower of rain which
night flashed continued from late evening
before his eyes. to almost midnight was an
unexpected blessing from
He remembered
that he had left
his duty in wildlife
reserve without
informing his
supervisor.
the rain god. Though every
villager in Rajasthan is used
to the scorching heat of
summer, a respite for a brief
was always welcome.
Bakhtiar Singh had come on
a furlough last evening to see
his family in the village. He
felt uncomfortable with the
heat when he entered his
house. It was too hot for him
inside the room as compared
to the open and cooler
Bakhtiar
was relieved to
see Raju peeping
from inside the
cave, safe and
sound!
environment in the tiger
reserve. The drop in
temperature and the cold
breeze coming from the
open window helped him
sleep comfortably once it
started raining.
I t was past midnight when
the rain stopped. The
temperature inside the room
was still cool and Bakhtiar
was in deep slumber when
suddenly a strong bolt of
lightning with a deafening
sound woke him up. Startled,
he opened his eyes and
looked around.
A cool breeze naughtily
touched his face and passed
away as if reminding him of
something. He got up from
the bed and opened the door
which he would have
normally kept open to
reduce the room
temperature but he had
closed it last night because of
the storm.
When he opened the door
he realised that the
temperature outside had
come down. But strong
winds of cool air moved from
one side to another giving a
warning that the intensity
may again increase and there
may be another storm
coming up. Suddenly all the
events of yesterday and the
night flashed before his eyes.
He remembered that he had
left his duty in wildlife
reserve without informing
his supervisor. During his
long career as a warden in
the forest reserve he had
never behaved in such an
irresponsible manner. Owing
to unknown fear he was so
overwhelmed by emotions
that he just wanted to leave
and go to his village.
Somebody had informed him
that his grandson was
seriously ill. He got so
perturbed with the news that
he immediately rushed to his
village and walked down a
distance of more than 10 km
on foot to see his grandson.
He was relieved to see his
grandson in a good condition
and realised that he had
unnecessarily panicked and
in that state of mind
neglected his official duty.
He did hand over the
responsibility to his junior
who was new to the job but
not experienced enough to
notice any unusual
happening in the tiger
reserve.
Bakhtiar suddenly had a
feeling of guilt that it was a
mistake coming home like
this on a furlough. Being too
emotional, compromising
with duty made him angry
with himself. Though it was
for the first time in his life
that he was so negligent, he
nevertheless did commit a
mistake. He was unhappy
with his behaviour and
decided to leave soon after
the rain stopped. Trekking a
distance of 10 km at night-
time was not a sound
proposition. Therefore, he
had no option but to wait till
dawn. It was painful for him
just to wait in his room and
waste time particularly when
his mind was burdened with
a vague fear which had
started bothering him.
W hile trying to sleep for
some more time
before there was enough
light to walk towards the
tiger reserve, Bakhtiar was
overpowered by another
fear, about something
catastrophic, something he
didn’t want to happen. He
suddenly felt a kind of
vacuum in his chest. He tried
to figure it out. Was it his
unauthorised absence from
duty ? Or was it his
apprehension that his
assistant may complain to
his seniors. One of his
supervisors may make a
surprise visit and find him
absent from duty or
poachers may do some
mischief in his absence. It
could be anything but he
pretty well knew it was not
any of those fears. Now that
he was relieved to see that
his own grandson was fine, it
was perhaps something else
– pertaining to Raju!
Bakhtiar Singh knew a lot
about wildlife, particularly
about tigers, more than he
knew about himself or his
fellow human beings. Right
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
from age 10 he lived with his
father in this wildlife reserve
and at the age of 60 when he
looked back he had no doubt
in his mind that this place
was his home, school, place
of work, temple, everything!
His grandfather was
appointed as an attendant in
the tiger reserve on a regular
salary during British rule
more than a century ago.
Getting a monthly salary
from Angrez sarkar and also
permission to look after his
own farms in the village was
a luxury in those days and his
grandfather enjoyed doing
both. When Bakhtiar Singh’s
father started working in the
reserve after his father’s
death, he completely
He had almost
given up any hope
of his progeny
continuing when a
ray of hope
appeared with the
birth of his second
grandson after a
gap of five long
years.
immersed himself in the job,
abandoned his farming,
rented his land out to his
cousins and concentrated on
his job in the tiger reserve.
He was so fascinated by the
wildlife in the tiger reserve
that, instead of admitting
Bakhtiar into a primary
school in the village, he took
him to the reserve and
exposed him gave ‘hands on
training’. Like his father,
Bakhtiar was also fascinated
by wildlife and really enjoyed
working as a warden in the
reserve.
Bakhtiar firmly believed
that human behaved just like
the tigers. It was the tiger
instinct that humans
expressed whenever warriors
defeated their enemies. He
had heard many such stories
from Rajputana and
elsewhere how powerful
kings fought for more
territory, more power and
more dominance. With a
desire to dominate they
attacked their weaker
neighbours, defeated them,
and married or enslaved their
wives and daughters and
killed the rest of the clan. In
the event of losing a battle
women would either
surrender or commit jowhar
before invaders touched
them.
B akhtiar, in his limited
world of the tiger
reserve, compared the lust
power of rajas and maharajas
with the tigers. He was
convinced that the territorial
equations in the reserve were
seen no different from
rajwadas and kingdoms. He
had several of these
leadership changes in the
section of forest he was
associated with for many
years. Stranger is the rule of
the jungle that the dominant
male tiger takes over the
charge as soon as it succeeds
in liquidating the weaker
leader. As soon as the
present leader is killed, a new
leader takes over. Like the
humans warriors the rest
have either to surrender or
perish. The females
surrender and the male cubs
are killed by the new leader.
Soon after taking over the
winning tiger marks his
territory with strong-
smelling urine and by
shedding the bark of trees.
Bakhtiar, like his father,
devoted most of his time
working in the reserve. He
entrusted to his children
farming of his land when
they grew up and spent most
of his time in the reserve.
125
This routine continued till he
became a grandfather. As
getting any transport from
the reserve to his village was
usually not easy and trekking
10 miles became increasingly
difficult for a
60-year-old man, he
preferred to visit his family
once a month only, except
for this unplanned
emergency visit which he
made because of deep
concern for his grandson.
B akhtiar was not always
like this. Having lived
and worked around the
wildlife reserve all his life, he
was fairly strong
emotionally. He had
dispassionate attitude to life.
After the death of his 10-
year-old grandson a few
years ago, he lost his inner
strength and became too
panicy. He had almost given
up any hope of his progeny
continuing when a ray of
hope appeared with the birth
of his second grandson after
a gap of five long years. That
is why when he heard that
his year-old grandson was ill,
he got unnerved and rushed
to see him on foot without
caring for his job.
As soon as he was relieved of
his anxiety he started
worrying about his
responsibility as a warden.
It was the recent incident
in the tiger reserve which
was the cause of Bakhtiar’s
of worry. Though he
regretted lapse of duty, it
was Shera’s death which was
a cause of concern. Shera
was the king tiger in the
south zone of the tiger
reserve which Bakhtiar had
been looking after for almost
50 years. Shera was the
dominant tiger in the area for
over four years. Padma, a
year older than Shera,
surrendered soon after Shera
took over the territory.
126
Padma delivered a male cub,
Raju, four months ago.
Shera fell to the bullet of
a poacher barely two weeks
back and with that tragedy
the territorial equations in
the reserve changed. Shera
was the strongest tiger in the
area and even the ambitious
tigers around the territory
never dared to take a chance
with him. Shera’s death was
bound to lead to territorial
fights in the reserve and it
was a foregone conclusion
that the male tiger that takes
over would definitely kill
Raju. After the death of his
elder grandchild, Bakhtiar
had become too sensitive
about kids. He had the same
The moment he
entered his hut he
heard a loud roar
coming from a
corner of the
reserve confirming
his apprehension,
and he prepared
himself to face the
worst.
tender feelings for the baby
cub that he had for his own
grandson. Therefore, his
worst apprehension was that
Raju’s life was in danger and
the worry started the day
Shera died. But his fears
intensified soon after the
area had a strong storm last
night followed by incessant
rain for several hours.
Bakhtiar had a reason for this
sudden apprehension
The reason for Bakhtiar’s
worry was that as soon as the
scent of Shera’s urine
disappeared from its
territory, the most dominant
male in the reserve's
hierarchy would try to take
over. Last night’s fierce
storm and rain wiped out
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
scent-markings of Shera’s
territory, thereby exposing
Padma and Raju to the wrath
of the invader. As is the rule
of jungle, he anticipated that
Padma would surrender
herself to the new leader but
Raju would be killed. That is
why Bakhtiar was worried
about Raju.
It was nine in the morning
when Bakhtiar entered the
premises of the tiger reserve.
Everything was quiet, same
as when he had left it the
previous day. A strange
odour entered his nostrils the
moment he walked towards
the interior of the reserve to
reach the hut. An unknown
fear overpowered him and he
started walking with a faster
pace to reach his hut. His
long experience of dealing
with tigers further deepened
his apprehensions and this
strange odour got him on his
feet. He was now almost sure
that a tiger from outside had
breached into Shera’s
territory. The moment he
entered his hut he heard a
loud roar coming from a
corner of the reserve
confirming his apprehension,
and he prepared himself to
face the worst.
His junior attendant was
still sleeping comfortably
and smelling of local booze
when Bakhtiar pounced on
the walkie-talkie to inform
his supervisor.
A fter a spell of several
roaring sounds echoing
all across the reserve, a
deadly silence followed
which sounded an alarm of
doom to Bakhtiar. He could
visualise the mutilated body
parts of Raju dispersed all
over and Padma silently
watching this massacre with
pain in her eyes.
While sitting on the back
of the rescue Jeep, Bakhtiar
was preparing himself to
mourn the death of four-
month- old Raju, his heart
deeply immersed in sorrow
exactly like when he saw his
elder grandson’s dead body.
He saw some bloodstains on
the grass and other
vegetations of the reserve
while the driver took them
towards Shera’s den.
Bakhtiar felt sick to look at
those bloodstains which
could be Raju’s. But he didn’t
see Raju’s body which made
him even more apprehensive
about Raju’s fate.
When the rescue team
came closer to Shera’s cave,
they noticed that a big tree
had fallen on the cave’s
mouth as a result of last
night’s storm, almost
blocking the entry to the
cave. On coming closer they
saw Padma’s badly hurt body
under the tree blocking the
rest of the mouth of the
cave. One could guess that
Padma had struggled and
fought the invader and
prevented his entry into the
cave.
W
hile Padma was lifted
onto the ambulance
after injecting her with a
dose of tranquilliser,
Bakhtiar was relieved to see
Raju peeping from inside the
cave, safe and sound!
Bakhtiar looked up to the
sky and bowed his head in
front of Padma’s body who
had neither surrendered nor
committed jowhar but
battled till the invader was
repulsed, fought with the
courage and strength of a
mother at the cost of her
life! We
Absences are a good
influence in love and keep
it bright and delicate.
I have a nine-month-old son. He had developed fever between
101-103 degrees, a few days back. When we took him to the
doctor, he diagnosed the condition as hand foot and mouth
disease. I am very worried. Please tell me what it is and how
harmful it is?
Hand foot and mouth disease is a viral disease that usually
affects children below the age of five years. It is airborne and
the child can take 3-6 days to develop symptoms. It is usually a
mild, self-limiting disease that is characterised by fever and
blisters on the hands, feet and mouth. The blisters may break
and form crust but usually do not itch.
Diagnosis is clinical and no tests are required for the same.
Treatment is usually symptomatic i.e. paracetamol for the
fever. In older children one can give cool drinks or ice cream to
soothe the throat and avoid spicy foods. The disease usually
subsides within 7-10 days.
My daughter is six years old. Could you please tell me what
sort of toys I should buy for her so that they are help in the
process of her mental and physical development besides
giving her pleasure?
Creativity should be encouraged at this age. You could get
her painting and drawing books and a lot of crayons.
Blackboards with dustless chalk will help her improve her co-
ordination skills as she tries to emulate her teacher. You could
also get her plasticine to create various
objects and simple construction sets.
I would like to know how many teeth a
child has and in what order do they
erupt so that I am prepared.
A child has a set of 20 milk teeth
(upper and lower jaw combined) that
comprise 2 incisors or front teeth, a canine on either side of the
incisors and the 1st and 2nd molar at the back on either side on
each jaw. Dentition begins at 6 months of age and is
completed by 24 months. The 1 st to appear are the lower
central incisors at 6 months of age while the upper central
incisors and the lower lateral incisors erupt at 7 months. The 1st
molars appear between 12 to 14 months, the canines between
16- 18 months and the 2nd molars between 20-24 months.
I have an eight month’s old son and as yet he has not
developed a sleep pattern. This is making all of us irritable.
Please tell me how to make him sleep properly at proper times
or is it too early to start doing the same.
This is the right time to develop a proper sleep pattern.
To help him do so you could set a routine for every night and
adhere to it. Put him to sleep at the same place so that he
associates the place with sleep. Keep the area dimly lit and
quiet so that he understands the difference between night
and day. Do not switch on the lights while feeding. Quickly
burp and change his nappy without talk or play as you would
do in the day. You could put him to sleep by patting, singing to
him, rocking or walking him around in your arms or in the
pram. If he wakes up after he has settled down, gently soothe
him back to sleep. Do not take him to the hustle-bustle area of
the house that will provoke him to wake up. Such rituals may
Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017
take up to an hour initially but after a month or so your baby
will get the ‘it’s time to sleep’ message and will miraculously
fall asleep within minutes. If you need to wake your baby up
for whatever reason do not do so by shaking him. Such rough
handling can be dangerous. Instead tickle his toes or blow
gently on the cheek.
I have two kids, a son aged seven and a daughter aged five. As
of now my servant and I are doing every thing for them. I
would like them to grow up as independent individuals but
do not know when to start asking them to take on
responsibilities. When I try telling them to keep their shoes in
the rack, etc. my mother-in-law intervenes, saying Saari umar
padi hai kaam karne ke liye. Abhi se unpe bojh kyon daal rahi ho.
Naukar chaker kis lie hai. And doubts begin to assail me. Please
advise.
It is never too early to start making them take on
responsibilities, despite the fact that you have servant at
home and you are a non-working mother. Set a routine and
ask them to tidy their room, water the plants or whatever else
they are capable of doing. Discuss the matter with your
mother-in-law separately and ask her not to contradict
you in front of the children, especially when you
QA
are trying so hard to make them self-
reliant.
Child &
Challenges
My son is five years old. For some time I
have noticed dark circles under his eyes. Could it be
because he plays on the computer, sleeps late and gets up
late?
Besides hereditary, one of the commonest causes of dark
circles under the eyes is lack of proper sleep. It is not good
even for an adult leave alone a young child to spend so much
time continuously at the computer. Dark circles will soon be
the least of his problems. As time goes by he will suffer from
dryness of eyes and pain in the back and neck so please
regulate his time in front of the computer as soon as possible.
An hour or so a day will suffice. See to it that he gets proper
rest at the proper time, plenty of physical exercise and
nutritious food. Correct anemia, if present. His dark circles
will soon disappear.
– Dr Amrinder Bajaj, MD.
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An unusual burglary
I remember waking up abruptly in
the middle of a night due to a lot of
disturbance outside my house. I looked
from my balcony and saw all my
neighbours gathered outside Mr
Sharma’s house. In no time I slipped into
my slippers and went with my parents
to see what was the noise all about.
When asked, one of our neighbors told
us that Tina who’s the elder daughter
of Mr and Mrs Sharma heard some
footsteps outside her room. She
immediately got out of her bed to look
for those footsteps. When she couldn’t
find anyone, she rushed to her parents’
room and woke them up. All of them
thought that a thief had entered into
their house so they equipped
themselves with sticks and torches.
They looked through the whole house
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but couldn’t find anything. A couple of
minutes later, Tina got suspicious and
looked for her younger brother. She
went to the terrace and found that her
brother was sleepwalking and it was his
footsteps that she had heard!c Weeks
have passed but I can still hear all those
laughs in my head from that night.
– Mansi Mahendru, New Delhi.
Have you any
sweet/sour experiences
with you immediate
neighbour? We will be glad
to publish them. Please sent them to:
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 ALWAYS LIGHT AT THE bad feelings like anger, anxiety and
END OF THE TUNNEL depression is right thinking because it
has the power to change life and
Appropos the article The Reality events around so that one can set out
Suicide by Dr Amulya Cherukumudi in to influence his/her subconscious mind
(WE August I). The article is an eye- towards a change of direction so that
opener to persons who at the drop of its energy is channelised into positive
the hat take drastic decision to end channels rather than morbid ones.
their lives instead of facing difficulties This would direct one to give up
and meeting challenges which is a part negative and crippling thoughts and
of life and then facing them with a smile replace them with cheerful and
which is an art of life. It is only persons pleasant experiences.
Singh
the BJP for
While blaming has failed to read
causing unrest,

y supported
chief minister
the sentiments
him in elections.
the chief minister
of a NON-POLITICAL losing the habit of smiling due to All in all, as life is all about forging a
PERSON
Virbhadra
that has traditionall its part, accused cases against

EDITORIAL
populace party, for corruption
The Opposition Delhi to deal with
in with anger. worst crime to be
of camping
Shimla simmered in the worse on
him while apparent disinterest makes things visited
Virbhadra’s a long time has not
the hills in streets. He
reported from well on the factor that angers
most
media as

negative thinking accept defeat, even

Delhi to

sensible approach, one must not fear

the social Another voices in
family yet.
the victim’s the failure of laissez-faire despite all
is innocent girl
urder of an this crime
TURN FIERY
Himachalis believe
of rape-cum-m petitions. They case, and
take note
SHIMLA HILLS
and
tehsil of campaigns the 2012 Delhi gang-rape liberals is
in Kotkhai the online
a schoolgirl one of brutal than of outrage
among
murder of was no less than other

T
turn when for the lack
he rape and took a mysterious
significant
in police custody, the only reason is less politically
Shimla district was killed Nepal Pradesh
Suraj Kumar, Suraj belonged to Himachal
the accused accused. since his
by another police station from
states.
reportedly the Kotkhai
lodged in others, mostly usual,

Refer to the editorial

IDENT

before making an attempt, develop

and had been with five Singh, as office as
NEW PRES

failure and feel despair about an

week along Virbhadra assumed
arrest last and murder Kovind has heavy
d. Chief minister and said, “Rape

B
Ram Nath registering
Uttarakhan issue
trivialise the there is nothing new.” of a class
JP’s pick of India after in the highest
appears to e and um-murder the 14th PresidentKumar. His workinghistory of India
everywher over Meira in the
happen now, the gangrape-c nted turmoil victory will be recorded worked as a man n
of
For a fortnight has caused an unprecede - nal office really
Shimla But the “conscious constitutio tell if he of the dispensatio
10 girl in g Paharis. brutality time will rubber stamp
peace-lovin unmoved by the sheer and only
or as mere
among the been n that followed. for most of
the
Delhi have conscience his status.
keepers” in and the shoddy investigatio class is all the that had elevated up as a surprise by the
political
of the crime the activists and the d government’s inept in India springs l candidate is chosen or for
President
of the presidentia preference

New President (WE suicidal tendencies. This leads to loss of

The silence given the Congress-le media uproar against people. Often, on merit but by personal . Person thus
more glaring case and huge social were slow to react.

incident because there is always light at

party not or community . There is
the usual, ruling section
handling of police, as viral that nt of certain famous worldwide from
probe. The of the girl’s body went Public
appeaseme becomes someone
the botched selected overnight party chooses bonhomie
when picturestaking the case seriously.walks of if the ruling to maintain
It was only all nothing wrong be the head of state
governmen
t began and people from action to . But the masses of
the swift among them parts of Parliament
through Shimla, to demand the three hour to know
the name
anger swept candlelight marches between all till the eleventh
life took out d, which
are kept waiting of the
criminals. was constitute of six no grooming ruling
against the investigati on team the arrest their next President. in the USA, the
with non- practice Can’t
A special days later four Unlike the
here.
takes place one year before the
the case nine and other
fled after

August I 2017). The

l candidate

confidence and interest to live.

residents
‘cracked’ has done this

the end of the tunnel. Keeping this in

two local accused hadn’t presidentia l candidate
people including enough, the arrest of
the its presidentia is over? BJP Modi its
Strangely With the party select President Narendra
g the crime. a flip. incumbent
Himachalis.
committin the case in term of the elections
by declaring before the election
have solved allegedly much in
allegedly claimed to victim was in 2014 general candidate adopted
accused, policeto police, 16-year-old returning home from ministerial practice is
was official prime announced . If this will have enough
According while she before taking dates were also, then
the people the person
waylaid by
six people
the girl with intoxicants time. The l election the pros and cons of
injected at the same presidentia and discuss next five years.
school. They her, strangling her the fact that she was time to debate head them for the and
turns to rape body bear witness
to her to growing popularity his
her Then the
six dragged
area. who is going , looking at Modi’s state under
marks on by her captors. it in a forested Meanwhile states after that India may go
bitten savagely the road and dumped BJP is winning

President should Suicide by youngsters on the rise is

further infuriated the way discussion majority

mind, meet each situation boldly as it

body away
from of the crime by police there is hush-hush . With huge
police’s version the six were framed leadership, l democracy BJP to amend the
the of presidentia
However, that linked to the US way , time is opportune
for . If
who alleged locals closely Singh initially l democracy
the people, way for presidentia go into
rich and influential Virbhadra police
in Parliament
n and pave parties will
to protect n. Chief minister n, stating that the Constitutio reality, then the politicalan edge over other
ruling dispensatiofor a CBI investigatio crowd burnt it becomes
a
and BJP has whom the BJP will
resisted calls when an unruly popular face to say,
fair, but buckled last week. poll with Needless
probe was blocked highways by another parties in this regard. l candidate then. ansera.com We
and reportedly
police vans with killing of Suraj tipping point. What choose as
its presidentia write to: editor@wom
And now, a because
has reached a mystery
the crisis station remains security.

always act as a non- primarily due to lack of self-confidence

suspect,
cells with minimal

arises by choosing worthy and

at the police 2017
happened adjacent (First)
housed in Era ● August
the two were Woman’s

political person in the discharge of his and self-esteem. Though failure is a wholesome goals.
duties. Even if he was associated with stepping stone to achieve success, – R. Srinivasan, Secunderabad.
any political party he must become many for no reason get into "Agitated
practically a non-political person. It Frustration" when things do not
would be better if the President happen according to their wish and Sho rt
Story A Strang
e Case ofe
Divorc
A RELEVANT STORY
Love And By R R Harshan
a
U- turn. All
taken a completehis lawyer
For what purpose? hall, she that

understands ground realities of they rush to commit suicide without

in the waiting allegations you in front of

Appropos the short

day sitting rushed into the

O
n a hot summer’sApril directly made against during the
of chamber. the magistrate been
in the month dark advocate’s is this?“ She have
a slim lady
with “Alok, what last hearing
face envelope from and now he
goggles on
her pretty drew out an threw it on
withdrawn
mellowed
the multi- handbag and the man seems to be
hurriedly entered and walked her front of
storeyed building the table in down.”
She pressed there “It’s a game, a
at her to the elevator. entering the who was sitting of Law. red per cent...
Alok stared the button
and, reading Journal ng young Alok…hund the court,“
to the third trick to misleadangrily. “He
with a deep lift, went up
A smart-looki was
lady spoke

common men besides some economic

the door up and

thinking twice. Similarly, in today's

walked to who the

story A Strange Case of

man looked his
contemp lation.l she floor. She Alok aback by his client
an thinks he will prove me as
with the nameplate Gujarat High
taken
office in such to accept
How beautifu Jain, Advocate, care to ring entered his willingness the
how and without his wife before force me to
looks and she! Court. She
didn’t
the angry mood and
magistrate later on, once I
and pushed
unlucky was the doorbell
Since nobody
was manners. seated Miss
“Please… be Komal go to him and would again
He thought, door open. ...Mrs back to him, in the
we …Oh sorry! Advocate Alok go me
sometim es “He Kashyap, “ start torturing I don’t want to
believe shall have
no smilingly apologised.
the
same manner. of
cannot life. Do you He picked
up make any
sort
divorce
place in my drew e. I want a
such an go
envelope and

and national and international politics world of discord and disharmony,

I say? I’ll never compromis

Love and Divorce by

thing hear what turning her and, for divorce.“
unfortun ate to a to him.“ Then said
out the letter
minutes,
only – only
“Okay. We
won’t let them
a little, she a couple of I
may happen voice down lawyer I in their plan.
“Being my read it carefully. be successful put a strong
lady like her.
seriously,
to foil their The lady sat
looking
assure you.
I’ll
expect you
plan to reach
a
deep concern before the
.” at him with argument
You don’t
compromise magistrate.
and worry. Alok
Advocate worry,“ Advocatethen asked
consoled her, “Mrs
Alok finished
in a soft manner,since
reading and
Komal Kashyap, I must

too. The new elected President must people feel stress for various reasons, R. R. Harshana in (WE
said calmly,
I’m your advocate, hide any
“So he has
say you shouldn’t about your
personal thingfrom me.
marital life

follow Pranab Mukherjee in principle. leading to depression. Further as July II). The writer has
– Mahesh Kumar, New Delhi. depression does not need an outside clearly driven the point
influence to occur, it is a state of through the character Komal that
intense sadness that disrupts women in general are very strong and
NEVER SURRENDER individual's social functioning. will not be carried away easily by sweet
Suicide
The Reality ation has on
life.

A wakeu
I felt sad to read the
p call to the
attitud

freshen
By Dr Amulya
e this gener
Cherukumudi suicide rate
In India, the 17 per cent of the
rate
is
100,000, which worldwide. That
total suicide lakh people commitingis
1.35
is 10.3 per

is a

life
As taking life is a cowardly act, none words of men. The story of a woman of
I
the morning, and flip whopping A precious
wake up in India alone. In
cup of coffee, daily. suicide in to suicide!
up, grab a 40 seconds have the
pages of my lost every to
through the how a 10th was found world. This

article The Reality should attempt even at the height of

2012, India

grit, fortitude and determination

an article rate in the
When I read committed
suicide
highest suicide to be proud of as
an
d the
standard student is not something and relatives, are
teacher reprimande
because the suicide
Indian. As
friends the signs?
actress commits I pick up on
child, or an harassed her, we not able to
to be quite
boyfriend
because her to know that would have
heart aches Someone suicide, or
flinch. The but am filled to commit I
life is lost, has disturbed we think.
such a young the idea that suicide as much as
at maybe not of a case of
with anger every issue, recall the
autopsy
solution to live in a highly girl in 2nd
PUC, committed
become a hanging. A of her
facing it. We the best she was scared
instead of

Suicide by Amulya
suicide because ns. She had

difficulties. The best recourse to avoid

e world, with rest being

essayed by Komal is a clear revelation

competitiv and the examinatio to her room
upcoming went up
being rewarded, d. Everyone, lunch as usual, stories
lost in the
backgroun income, face herself. I hear because
status and and hanged
despite their on a daily
basis. commit suicide The
where they break-up.
numerous
problems g suicide as went through a it is definitely
entertainin they
Are we really this? endless, but
to reasons are life over.
an answer from ending one’s – on
people suffering have not worth with a paradox
I have seen , many We are faced have desperate
depression
severe clinical suicide. However, the one hand,
we years
suicide after
tried to commit disorder requiring farmers commiting On the

(August I issue) and to

that is psychiatric who is upset pay off debts.
Not everyone When you of trying to resorting
treatment! . we have children
depression not the end other hand of some seemingly
suffers from n, it is to this because at school or home.
fail in an examinatio it. It is just
as you know trivial problem level do children
of the world in an otherwise long What maturity such drastic
one obstacle Has it become that possess to
make
lives? They have
life. with such to end their

CHANGE ATTITUDE
promising in all its
we can’t cope what decisions the world
hard that I wonder yet to experience where
small problems? they stand or bad. I wonder get these
through when around glory, good even
people go and teenagers Do we

police, the only hope to save the girls

a noose

know that India has the

tying children the media?
on the stool, impending we blame just
awaiting their one's ideas! Do ? Or do we
their necks, to end blame our
upbringing world
it that easy fast-paced
demise. Is and shocking
that
hold this modern,
life? It’s scary in its value responsible
?
help for mental
life is diminishing sound Seeking psychiatricdepression, is
car. I may
like a used instability,
especially modern
for the in our seemingly

TOWARDS WOMEN
inhumane

EDITORIAL
, but it is still a stigma people don’t
comparison true. The
ely society. Most the problem, and suffer

YOGA DAY
unfortunat the truth ge and family,
acknowled
fear of facing Even as friendssulking and with great

from these anti- social and mentally

in silence.

highest rate of suicide

more to stop was celebrated dispute
is somehow al Yoga Day can be no

I
we ask someone t
difficult than nternation enthusiasm . There
the way governmen
i g poison fervour and benefits of Yoga. But Yoga seems
the
regarding and sponsoring al Yoga
patronising first Internationinvasion
(Modi) is Remember, the very
POLICE to g.
society saw
it as a cultural

INSENSITIVE
intimidatin
sections of way of life. as
Day? Some beliefs and religion and
with policemen in on their traditional with Hindu Surya
of rape, sleep saw it associated asanas like of all
They also do some

S
happened
victim has part
hould women, arrested? Yes, this began back in refused to is an integral
such plainly reciting Om as it g or telling
beeds.

Apropos the
get their rapists Pradesh. The case Satar offered

in the world. Fear of exams, results, sick boys proves that they too are no
and worshippin associated
Rampur,
Uttar Ameer and and Namaskar recite while other myths including
woman said to return mantras Hindus and several
when the house, only alone. of this of society, of
February from a relative's she was home Because section full benefit
her a lift homewhen they discovered says officers failed
to a large of getting
but with Yoga, remain deprived
rape her later the case to police, court to complain. some Hindus, in some form
She reported to a local the same all cultures different in
until she went - who live in in Yoga. has existed in g are
leaving her Yoga
file charges attackers
she said her roam the streets, The fact is of worshippin goal. Likewise,
Even then, like the ways a common
left free to or other; just but with
since
village - were with different cultures a
have sex religions present in
needed to her requests different
has also been religion, it is mainly
considered
fear of life. then told her she says meditation Hindu
only.
men. She

editorial in (WE July I)

l. In special attainment

different from the rapists. What the

Singh who

love failure, after-marriage clashes, loss

Inspector arrest the time immemoria or some people of
he would IO Jai Prakashor detaining sages
him before ignored by the rapists the alleged domain of ical or scientific
were repeatedly action against myth.
of This is a great are solving a mathemat sports persons,
instead of
taking
her on the lurid details When you . Likewise, .
them cross-exam
ined he you are meditating they are meditating
to jail the pair, problem, on victory, called active
pleas to Singh in private and are focusing , which may be
attack. desperate meet when they capacity
Despite making her asking to about of meditation mental and physical focused
she complained This type they mainly
began messaging says. When case. But Singh kept , can boost
ing her, she meditation Hindu religion,
proposition she claims he closed
the sly. But in is
secret recordings tremendou . the masses
his behaviour, point she made on passive
meditation Yoga among been doing this
her, at which

Insensitive Police. It is a culprits are doing out of their filthy

dent Vipin popularise
people have

of job and death of beloved are some

on harassing to the police chief. superinten Move to of or money.
Scores publicity
and took them tapes, police doesn't match with ble.
without caring
for
though lots
about the clip commenda
in the past come in limelight even Yoga from
Speaking in the audio investigate her charges devotedly
“The voice will could never after learning
Tada said, r]. But we Their work huge health benefits
[investigato
that of the in distress. The of people got Yoga
.”
thoroughly the last resort for
a person at the some so-called of it.
humiliation a their masters. past few years that money out
Police are suffered physical harassed by It is only
in
began minting common people.
this case first is being Yoga and the
woman in and now law and respect gurus hijacked distanced Yoga from e people at special
two men to uphold
hands of This has further and high-profil International Yoga
, who is supposed remain on celebrities
policeman
n of police Even the Throngs of to mark the

heart-breaking truth
dignity. organised

mind police men are doing the same

Yoga, it

of the trivial reasons for suicide. A true

woman’s gender sensitisatio ed in action. Yoga sessions to it.
All talks of are not implement culprit to popularise
only and to protect the Day is testimony t truly wants the myths associated
a
paper are trying If the governmen to dispel is seen as
higher authorities cases of make efforts on, which the
34,000 reported must first current dispensati to restore
policeman. there were far higher with it. The n, will have against their
likely to be dispensatio
In 2015 alone, number is fear they staunch Hindutva that Yoga
is not
though that police for by their of masses
rape in India, do not go to the confidence sively
be shunned comprehen
since many believed, or will religion or
faith. be undertaken Yoga to get its
will not
be can a drive adopt
. a crime, further Only then people will
considered be and more We
community is also not cases. It should and more
le health benefits. to: editor@wom
ansera.com
Marital rape

of the society we are wearing uniform of the defenders.

of unreported handled by women

friend or a relative lending their helping

the number will be n uncountab write
adding to that rape cases sensitisatio
of police
made mandatoryOnly then concept
police officers. 2017
(First)
will be a reality. Era ● July
Woman’s

hands and listening calmly to the living in. It seems nowadays being What is the use of making laws in
troubled person, prevents one from insensitive towards everything has favour of women when protectors
committing suicide and never should become a trend of our modern themselves turn criminals?
one think of suicide as a solution to a society. Otherwise how come a girl Is female police as indifferent as
problem. can be a victim of rape in the crowded male police. It seems police is police.
No doubt, life is full of challenges bus or any other congested place. Just Gender makes no difference.
for each and every person, be it the two or four men attacking a girl can Making laws or developing security
rich or the poor. How one jumps the easily be controlled by forty-fifty apps for avoiding crimes against
hurdles and climbs the ladder taking people present there. But they prefer women will not suffice. Instead
the hardships that come their way in a to remain spectators rather than inculcating values like respecting and
right sense with wise thinking, is what coming forward to her rescue. The protecting dignity of females in the
matters to maintain one’s short and reason is insensitivity'. minds of our children is the need of
sweet life, colourful. The situation becomes more the hour.
– Preetha Rengaswamy, Chennai. painful and disappointing when the – Vedsmriti Gour, Pune.

Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017 129

that mutual respect in husband-wife
relationship is paramount to sustain
the marriage. As abuses and torture
puts increasing pressure on the
relationship, it ultimately leading to
break-up of marriage is a fact in most
cases. Komal deserting her husband
Utpal is due to strange behaviour and
false accusations by doubting her
fidelity which no woman would ever
forgive or forget. Even dragging her to
the court by withdrawing the serious
allegations proved futile because after
insulting womanhood, there was no
chance of Komal reviewing her
decision. In fact, her decision to leave
him forever proves a point that she is
not a weak woman to succumb to his
diktats, abuses and tortures. Her
resolve to die than join him is a clear
pointer that pressure won't work
anymore.
All in all, the story underlined a
message that women are free to think,
act or speak in their own way. The final
verdict of the court freeing Komal from
the clutches of Utpal's unholy hands
and undignified eyes is a clear
revelation and reminder to men that
they should not treat wife as a dancing
doll subservient to them.
I wish WE to publish more relevant
stories like this which gives strong and
pertinent message to the society.
– R. Srinivasan, Secunderabad.
what to
wondering
you may be
Actually, what countrymen, in
general, have understood Yoga, is
mere physical exercise, whereas Yoga
is for complete transformation of one’s
life. What physical figure will do when
one’s psychology is crippled with
egoism, materialism, enmity, anger and
other negative vices? Genuine Yoga
performers do not merely vie for the
Press covered public shows. If person-
alities like Baba Ram Dev are shown in
Press coverage for inspiration, the
move will be fruitful. Otherwise the de-
shaped bodies of the ministers and
VIPs, shown widely in news-coverage
on Yoga Day alone, presents
distorted/dismal aspect of Yoga.
How the persons who never have
had performed yoga in daily routine,
can inspire millions towards positive
aspects of Yoga?
– MPS Chadha, Mohali.
WORK TILL
HEALTH ALLOWS
life after

W
hen you retire, an enjoyable
want to have sure you
do next. You The first step is making you need
Then
all those years. free time. want to
enjoy your

The prize is awarded to:

enough to for what you
are healthy funds to pay
that you have activities you enjoy. look
to ensure to find
you need many people hassles
do finally time is something away from the
Retirement relaxation
It is time of
forward to. of one’s life
studies. best part to
of job and can be the job but free

Enjoy
ment time by any boring
Post-retire and he
a person is not shackledmay bring joy to him
when which
any activity
indulge in set their own
goals

Vedsmriti Gour, Pune.

much. person can
likes it very when the will. He is
not
It is the time at his own free sweet pressure of towing
them from

Refer to Life After

and achieve any boss. He is free can really enjoy
to

How to
answerable deadline and
meeting the
the line or
he is doing.
whatever
time when
This is the
he can interact his family
lovingly with he has
as
and friends
on his
all the time
hands.

Retirement (WE July II,

ns are
suggestio
Some golden :
and stop demanding Bala
Stop bribing leads to better
its.By Dr Kiran
Old-age benef
Better adjustment who is well adjusted
retiree the
health. Any fitter than young
healthy and a person is
tends to be just cribbing. In fact, of you: When dreams
ones who
are goal in front grows old many of his old.
Have some as he not
both health
and . a goal. But command life you are
are interrelated life itself is you day. Think
adjustment saying “Man is a As long as plan your

WOMAN'S ERA
There is a wants
flounder. morning and

2017). Why should one

it is hot he Get up in the your plans.
fool! When cool, he and make
when it is positively nt is
cool! And Financial manageme
fool! in
feels like a the mind!” with money: your saving
“It is all in Be shrewd to wisely investelderly should take
in this world You have The
Everything so important. schemes. plans.
and bad and big secure and annuity
has good . financially health insurance
retirement of for
too is with if you
advantage to set in earlier
During retirement Old age seems interaction
a recluse: a positive
whatever
enjoy doing then you Do not be who have should be
to you recluses than for those Old people them the
comes friends. gives
family and This

retire till he can deliver

with their social functions.

invites readers’
are a winner! and
d to attend friends and new people
encourage old
but by y to meet
Life is short, opportunit adjusting abilities.
enjoy life. ones day in
It is time to good. So,
the senior sharpen their minutes every
Enjoy life: one can feel always. Do
a lot
spend a few
making it
enjoyable
sometime
and enjoy
and if nothing Those who and cool.
well, drink Meditate: calm
please eat singing, dancing feel more
Get into reading, mode’ frequently. meditation “At age of
of things. ‘laughing way of life: and 24 to
30
getting into ” So to a sedentary every day
else then workshop! Say bye-bye kilometers Roy. There
brain is devil’s hobby. o, I run 12-16 Says marathoner Ashis

opinions and
“An idle man’sa job then with some seventy-tw
Keep busy: If not in on Sundays”,

the goods in quality

busy. feel that you are khaali kilometres
keep yourself family members
Don’t let your July (Second)
2017

and time? Once either of it is difficult reactions on

just because of age factor that is the articles, short stories
and features published
time–age for retirement.
in Woman’s Era. The best
Even in service retirement age is letter will be given a prize of
raised to 60/65, etc and in private till `500. Address your letters by
goods are delivered-successfully E-mail to: letters@womansera.com
services are rendered. To remain busy or by post to:
in one’s profession is good as it is no
AS YOU SAY
interference in life of other family
members. E-3 Jhandewala Estate,
Once Amitabh Bachchan said he New Delhi-110055.
Womansera.com
shall work till he shall be thrown out,
not in demand. Dev Anand could afford Name:
to make films in his eighties. Till health Mobile:
allows continue to work is the motto of E-mail:
life.
– Mahesh Kapasi, New Delhi.

YOGA IS NOT MERELY

EDITORIAL PHYSICAL EXERCISE
YOGA DAYDay was celebratedbe with great
no dispute

I
al Yoga can t
nternation enthusiasm . There
the way governmen
fervour and benefits of Yoga. But Yoga seems
the
regarding and sponsoring al Yoga
patronising first Internationinvasion
(Modi) is Remember, the very
POLICE to g.
society saw
it as a cultural

INSENSITIVE
intimidatin
sections of way of life. as
Day? Some beliefs and religion and
with policemen in on their traditional with Hindu Surya
of rape, sleep saw it associated asanas like of all
They also do some

S
happened
victim has part
hould women, arrested? Yes, this began back in refused to is an integral
such plainly reciting Om as it g or telling
beeds.
get their rapists Pradesh. The case Satar offered and worshippin
Rampur,
Uttar Ameer and and Namaskar recite while myths associated
woman said to return mantras Hindus several other including
when the house, only alone. of this and section of society, benefit of
February from a relative's she was home Because

Yoga Day (Woman’s

to a large full
her a lift homewhen they discovered says officers failed with Yoga, remain deprived
of getting
but
rape her later the case to police, to complain. some Hindus, in some form
local court
She reported she went to a live in the same Yoga. existed in all cultures different in
g are
until - who in Yoga has
file charges attackers leaving her The fact is of worshippin goal. Likewise,
she said her roam the streets, like the ways
Even then, left free to or other; just but with
a common since
village - were with different cultures a
have sex religions present in
needed to her requests different
has also been religion, it is mainly
considered
fear of life. then told her she says meditation only.
men. She Singh who l. In Hindu special attainment
Inspector arrest the time immemoria or some people of
he would IO Jai Prakashor detaining sages
him before ignored by the rapists the alleged domain of ical or scientific
were repeatedly action against myth.
of This is a great are solving a mathemat sports persons,
the lurid details

Era: July I, 2017) came

taking
instead of ined her on When you . Likewise, .
them cross-exam
he you are meditating they are meditating
to jail the pair, problem, on victory, called active
pleas to Singh in private and are focusing , which may be
attack. desperate meet when they capacity
Despite making her asking to about of meditation mental and physical focused
she complained This type they mainly
began messaging says. When case. But Singh kept , can boost
ing her, she meditation Hindu religion,
proposition she claims he closed
the sly. But in is
secret recordings tremendou . the masses
his behaviour, point she made on passive
meditation Yoga among doing this
her, at which to populariseof people have been or money.
on harassing to the police chief. dent Vipin Move
superinten ble. Scores for publicity
and took them tapes, police doesn't match with without caring though lots
about the clip commenda
in the past come in limelight even Yoga from
Speaking in the audio investigate her charges devotedly
“The voice

meaningfully. On the
Tada said, r]. But we
will could never after learning
[investigato The Their work huge health benefits
that of the got Yoga
in distress. of people
.”
thoroughly the last resort for
a person at the some so-called of it.
humiliation a their masters. past few years that money out
Police are suffered physical harassed by It is only
in
began minting common people.
this case first is being Yoga and the
woman in

Readers are welcome to

two men
and now law and respect gurus hijacked distanced Yoga from e people at special
hands of to uphold
, who is supposed This has further and high-profil International Yoga
policeman remain on Throngs of
celebrities to mark the
dignity. n of police Even the organised
woman’s gender sensitisatio ed in action. Yoga sessions to it. Yoga, it
All talks of are not implement the culprit Day is testimony truly wants to
popularise
associated
and to protect t the myths
paper only are trying If the governmen to dispel is seen as
a
make efforts

Annual Yoga Day; it

higher authorities cases of must first
on, which the
34,000 reported current dispensati to restore
policeman. there were far higher with it. The n, will have against their
likely to be dispensatio
In 2015 alone, number is fear they staunch Hindutva that Yoga
is not
though that police for by their of masses
rape in India, do not go to the sively

send their letters, opinions, criticism

be shunned confidence comprehen
since many believed, or will religion or
faith. be undertaken Yoga to get its
will not
be can a drive adopt
. a crime, further Only then people will
considered be and more W
community is also not cases. It should and more
le health benefits. to: editor@wom
ansera.com
Marital rape of unreported handled by women uncountab write
the number will be n
adding to that rape cases sensitisatio
of police
made mandatoryOnly then concept

seems as if whole India

police officers. (First) 2017
will be a reality. Era ● July
Woman’s

and suggestions
(foreign too) stood instantly tuned to about published items to:
Yoga; how genuine or practicable it
actually is, only time will tell.
Letters@womansera.com

130 Woman’s Era ● September (First) 2017