The Mars Return

and the Terrible Two's

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Most people have heard of the "terrible two's", it is regarded as one of the first
of the major stages that mark the 'ages of childhood'.

For most children, this time coincides with the return of the planet Mars to the
exact zodiacal position it was at the time of birth. This is called the Mars return.

This return occurs approximately every 22 months, but the first one is generally
the most significant, as it is the first. Mars is the planet of aggression, assertion
and anger, it gives us drive and desire to move forward. When Mars returns to
it's natal position for the first time, it can trigger off 'Martian' behaviour in your
little one. That placid little baby you had, suddenly begins to throw 'temper
tantrums', the little hands become firmly planted on the hips and the foot begins
to stomp, while the favourite word is "NO".

It is important, as parents, to understand why these changes are taking place in

your little one. This is the first step, of many, in the quest for ultimate
independence. How you handle your little ones first attempts will greatly
influence how they will attempt independence in the future.
Why is it that a seemingly placid and almost angelic child can suddenly become
a raging bull? The child who was always very co-operative, instead challenges
every request?

Behavioural changes can occur with children at any age and for a variety of
reasons, however, the first time this is likely to occur is around the age of 2
years.

At this age the child is having the first "Mars return". This is when the planet
Mars, returns to the identical position that it occupied at the time of birth. The
first Mars return becomes a major focus of energy for some children,
particularly those who have a strong Mars in the natal chart.

When Mars makes it's first return to the Natal position, by transit, it has
completed it's first full cycle of the chart. During this time it has made every
aspect possible to every planet and point in the chart, and the return marks the
beginning of a new cycle.

Mars, in the chart represents our ability to assert ourselves; it is our drive and
momentum in life. When it begins the second journey through the chart, there is
already a point of reference and therefore the child feels more confident now in
making demands and being more assertive, and in some children even
aggressive. Mars represents our competitive spirit as well and is an important
factor in our physical and sporting ability. Children generally become more co-
ordinated and better at gross motor activities at this time.

If a child is particularly active and difficult during this stage, an introduction to

some form of organised physical activity would be a good way to burn off the
excess energy and introduce some discipline in the use of the more
assertive/aggressive behaviour. Activities such as kindy gym, swimming lessons
and dance would be positive outlets for the energy.

The child at this stage needs to feel comfortable with expressing needs and
desires but also needs to learn what is an appropriate expression. It is very
important that the child knows his needs are being heard and acknowledged. It
is also essential that the child learn to differentiate between appropriate and
inappropriate ways, times and places.

Children who are handled well at this stage are more likely to become better
able to express themselves, and be more self reliant than those who feel they are
ignored or that aggression is the best way to get the attention. This is the age at
which school bullies are created. It is also the age where the wimp is created.
This applies to both boys and girls.

This can be a very confronting time for the parent, particularly if they
themselves did not receive the appropriate recognition at this stage in their own
development. How do you react to your small child's tantrums and demands?
Do you feel threatened, angry or throw your hands up and give in??? None of
these is a good response and now may be a good time for you to address your
own issues with assertiveness. How do you handle stressful situations yourself?
Are you able to maintain your perspective and work through the situation
calmly and rationally or do you become the aggressor or the wimp? Your own
response can indicate how you were treated at the age of two and give you a
clearer understanding of how to respond to your own child's needs.
Planetary returns
The planetary return in astrology is when the transiting planet returns to the
precise position it was in at the moment of a person's birth. Symbolically this
means that the planet is beginning a new cycle in a person's life. Returns apply
also to the sun and moon - an astrologer would say that a person's birthday is
technically their 'solar return'; for it marks the day when the sun returns to the
same position in the zodiac as on a person's original birthday. The most
important returns are those of the outer planets Jupiter, Saturn and Uranus.[12]
Half-returns (when the planet reaches the halfway point in its journey) are also
important, especially in the case of Uranus, as many people may not live long
enough to see or get the full benefit of its full return of 84 years.
Jupiter returns
Jupiter returns occur every twelve years or so, and indicate a new phase of
growth and development in life. The first Jupiter return, at around age twelve,
concerns the move into adolescence and puberty; while the second return at
around age 24 concerns the first real moves into the adult world. The year of a
Jupiter return will usually be a good one, with prizes won and grants awarded.
Writers are often first published in this year, and sports people achieve their first
important goals. Foreign travel and higher study are often indicated. The Jupiter
return is the ideal time to push forward and be assertive, as efforts will usually
be well rewarded.
Saturn returns
Saturn returns occur approximately every thirty years and indicate a phase in the
aging process when new realities and responsibilities must be faced. The first
Saturn return occurs at around age thirty and concerns the time when the first
real responsibilities are felt. Many people will make a serious commitment at
this time, perhaps to marriage, starting a family or buying a home. It is also a
time when many assess relationships that have failed and realise that it is time to
end them. As regards work, many will reassess their career and question their
progress to date. This can be a good time to change direction and retrain, even
at the cost of a lower salary for a while.
The second return occurs at around age sixty and concerns the time when
people reassess the next phase of their lives. Many people begin to consider
retiring from full time work and developing interests that have been neglected
because of career and children. It is also the first time that many have to face the
reality of approaching old age. It is important to have a constructive, practical
attitude at this time, and not simply regard oneself as being 'on the scrapheap',
as for most people there are still many good years ahead. The Saturn return is
often a difficult and challenging time, but decisions taken and changes made
usually work out well in the long term if they are sensible and followed thru
with.
Uranus returns
Uranus takes about 84 years to complete a full return. However, one of its most
important influences is felt when it reaches the half way stage in its journey, at
around age 42. The Uranus half-return is the origin of what for many people is
the 'mid-life crisis'. Women, especially those with children growing up and
leaving home, may feel that life has passed them by. A lot of women also begin
the pre-menstrual stage at this time, and many men experience the 'male
menopause'. Permanent and successful long-term relationships may be unsettled
or disrupted by casual flirtations and affairs. The Uranus half-return can be
stressful and tense, but also energising. It is the ideal time for people to break
out of routine lifestyles that they have been stuck in for years, and develop new
interests.
The full Uranus return takes place around age 84, and if the person is
reasonably well and fit, it can herald a new and lively interest in life. For
example, many creative people have completed great works after the age of 84 -
Verdi composed his opera Falstaff, and Picasso painted many of his finest
paintings late in life.