LIVE LONG OR PROSPER!

Ruy José Válka Alves

Vulcan Stardate 295406296;

Mission report: Planet Earth.

The near orbit (700–3600 km) of the planet is scattered with millions of artificial
satellites and fragments derived thereof, up to six meters in diameter but usually smaller.
These pose a great risk for navigation without deflector shields.
Our biologists have found an abundance of life forms, mostly microbes and fungi, some
of which apparently derived from larger and more complex organisms. Most of the
microbes obtain their energy from chemical reactions around discharges of lightning.
Before melting, our surface probes have reported that thousands of complex, mostly
organic chemicals are abundant in the atmosphere, water and soil. The atmosphere at
surface level has temperatures of 36-55 oC and has the following main components: 54%
Nitrogen, 16% Carbon Dioxide, 11% Oxygen, 9% of various Sulphur oxides, 4% Carbon
Monoxide, 1.3% Mercury vapor;
The oceans cover 73% of the planet and have high opacity, acidity (ph <3.5) and salinity
(75ppt). Mean ocean temperatures vary from 12 oC at the poles to 33 oC at the Equator. One
third of the ocean surfaces is covered by floating objects of low density and mainly
chlorinated hydrocarbon polymers. Some of these objects share complex geometrical
shapes, but are not of known crystalline structure.
Rock outcrops and soils on the continent harbor extensive Cyanobacterial crusts and
fungi. Soils are very variable, but their upper 10cm are invariably covered with a layer of
ashes rich in Uranium breakdown derivatives. The same is true for the thousands of
surveyed islands and archipelagoes.
The archaeological probes have found several artificial satellites in orbit and still
functioning, which revealed a wealth of data on some of the extinct civilizations. Ruins of
constructions on land also preserve a rich testimony of these intriguing life forms, now
extinct. From the satellites, we found the current Earth date to be December 25th, 2112.
The most abundant species were heterotrophic animals with a bilateral symmetry. One
species was a 4-legged herbivore weighing ca. 400kg, and was apparently raised as staple
food for the dominant species, a 100kg omnivore. The latter walked erect on 2 limbs and
used the other two to manipulate objects, mainly weapons. Near the time of extinction of
the biosphere, there about eight billion bipeds and just as many of the aforementioned
quadrupeds. These populations alone accounted for over half the biomass of the Planet.
They consumed so much oxygen and vegetation that their terrestrial habitats became
depleted beyond repair. Furthermore, a significant surface of the oceans was covered by
floating organic debris, reducing evaporation and heating the water, leading to acidification.
Depleting other natural resources and the resulting pollution followed in tandem.
All obtained data stores in the satellites indicates that for over three centuries, the bipeds
were motivated by the firm belief that prosperity is measured by a steady rate of
economical growth. Strangely they did so on a Planet of finite dimensions and with
nowhere else to go, ignoring warnings issued by biped scientist Malthus when the growth
frenzy began. Even though the mechanisms which lead to the present situation of planet
Earth are well known, it is intriguing to us how a civilization with relatively advanced
science and art could succumb to a simple arithmetic mistake and thus destroy almost one
billion years of evolution in just 3 centuries.
Considering the currently growing orbit of Earth’s only Moon, and the fact that the Sun
has about 5 Billion years of fuel left, it seems reasonable to suppose that the Planet shall
become inhabitable again in approximately 3 to 4 Billion years. At present, we cannot
fathom the life forms which might evolve there from the current assembly of
microorganisms and fungi, but those biped forms have certainly not worked out.
Recommendations to all navigators: avoid orbiting planet Earth for risk of collision with
satellite fragments. Descending on the surface is highly risky (and should be prohibited)
due to a highly toxic atmosphere and total lack of usable resources.