1

A REPORT ON CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE

Page
Table of Contents
A. Introduction....................................................................................................................... 2
B. Definition.......................................................................................................................... 2
B.1 Victims................................................................................................................ 3
B.2 Circumstances..................................................................................................... 3
B.3 Signs.................................................................................................................... 3
B.3.1 Physical................................................................................................... 3
B.3.2 Behavioral............................................................................................... 4
B.3.3 Emotional/Relational..............................................................................4
B.3.4 Spiritual.................................................................................................. 5
B.4 Consequences to abused children........................................................................5
C. Facts and Figures: Child Sexual Abuse in the Philippine Context....................................6
C.1 Situation of Filipino Children.............................................................................6
C.2 Child Abuse Statistics in the Philippines.............................................................7
C.3 UP-PGH Child Protection Unit...........................................................................8
C.4. Types of Abuse................................................................................................... 8
C.5 Referrals.............................................................................................................. 9
C.6 Perpetrator Information..................................................................................... 10
D. Church Teachings............................................................................................................ 11
E. Pastoral Implications....................................................................................................... 13
E.1 Common Issues Connected to Child Sexual Abuse...........................................13
E.2 FAQs (Frequently Asked Questions).................................................................15
E.3 Dealing with Perpetrators/Abusers....................................................................17
E.3.1 Silence: A Feature.................................................................................17
E.3.2 Explaining or Understanding the Abuse................................................18
E.3.3 Possibility for Change...........................................................................18
E.3.4 Mercy and Forgiveness.........................................................................18
E.3.5 Abused – the Most Important Person....................................................19
E.3.6 Innocent Person Accused of Abuse.......................................................19
E.4 Government Initiatives...................................................................................... 19

Addenda
F. Protecting Children From Sexual Abuse..........................................................................20
F.1 What Parents Need to Consider.........................................................................20
F.2 Basic Prevention Concepts to Teach Children...................................................21
G. Responding to Child Sexual Abuse.................................................................................21
G.1 What to Say....................................................................................................... 21
G.2 What to Do........................................................................................................ 22
G.2.1 Report................................................................................................... 22
G.2.2 After hearing a disclosure….................................................................23
G.2.3 Meeting the needs of others involved...................................................23
G.2.4 Local Agencies concerned with Child Sexual Abuse...........................24

Sources................................................................................................................................. 26
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A. INTRODUCTION

This report provides general information regarding the reality of the issue at hand.
Hopefully, it would be an eye-opener for future pastors of the Church who are expected
to care for the ‘little ones’ who are most dear to our Lord. Likewise, it is an invitation for
all engaged in caring or educating children to adopt a certain sensitivity with regard to
this issue thereby contributing to the work of stopping and preventing such an immoral
act that equally threatens the foundation of our society – the family.
The issue shall be defined as well as the presentation of pertinent details to better
understand the facts. Recent statistical reports, particularly in the local scene, regarding
this phenomenon shall be considered in order to establish the growing awareness of child
sexual abuse in the country. Thence, a brief presentation of Church Teachings adapting V.
Genovesi’s treatment of sexuality shall be made which will serve as guiding principles in
drawing out concrete responses to the pastoral implications of the issue dealt upon.
Likewise, an article from Sarah Harte would be used to provide some basic consideration
in understanding and dealing with the perpetrator, serving as well, as a simple critique on
our attitude towards abusers in general.
This report in no way whatsoever claim to be a comprehensive presentation of the
entire process of caring for sexually abused children. But it humbly offers the ‘basics’ for
would-be pastors in recognizing, dealing and caring for sexually abused children among
the flock entrusted to them.

Goals for this Report:

 To increase the audience awareness of the nature and extent of child sexual abuse.
 To aid the participants in responding to victims and abusers in order to recognize
the abuse as well as the basic knowledge in responding to the religious concerns
of victims and abusers.
 To increase our individual cooperation or as a religious community with the
secular communities in response to child sexual abuse.

B. DEFINITION:

An Old Problem
Child abuse is a phenomenon that happened not only in our present era, it is a
reality as old as mankind itself. The narrower form of abuse is called child sexual abuse
which has captured our attention in recent times, especially those cases which occurred in
institutions under the control of priests and religious, and provoked a flood of moral
outrage.1
There is no universal definition of child sexual abuse. However, a central
characteristic of any abuse is the dominant position of an adult that allows him or her to
force or coerce a child into sexual activity. Dr. Kearney considers even “any… sexual
act between an infant or young child and a significantly older child” as child sexual

1
Harte, Sarah, Child Abuse Reflecting on a problem as old as the hills, Spirituality 10/7 January-February
2004 No. 34, p48.
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abuse.2 The specific legal definition varies from jurisdiction to jurisdiction, but five- (5)
years difference is a common yardstick in so far as the older one uses the child as an
object for sexual satisfaction regardless of the acts performed.3
Child sexual abuse may include fondling a child's genitals, masturbation in front
of a child or by rubbing against a child, oral-genital contact, digital penetration, and
vaginal and anal intercourse, exposure of the perpetrator’s or child’s genitalia including
photography and videotaping, requiring the child to view or participate in adult sexual
activity.
Child sexual abuse is not solely restricted to physical contact; such abuse could
include non-contact abuse such as exposure, voyeurism, and child pornography. Abuse
by peers also occurs.4 Sexualized play that features adult sexual activities even between
children who are nearly of the same age is a warning sign that one or both children
involved has been abused and thus should be taken seriously.

B.1. Victims of Child Sexual Abuse5

Children and adolescents, regardless of their race, culture, or economic status,
appear to be at approximately equal risk for sexual victimization. Statistics show that
girls are sexually abused more often than boys are. However, boys' and, later, men's,
tendency not to report their victimization may affect these statistics. Some men even feel
societal pressure to be proud of early sexual activity (no matter how unwanted it may
have been at the time). It is telling, however, to note that men who have been abused are
more commonly seen in the criminal justice system than in clinical mental health settings.

B.2. Circumstances of Child Sexual Abuse

Most of the cases of child sexual abuse happens in on-going relationships with
someone they know more often than with strangers. Bribery; playing on fears, trickery,
threats of consequence are some of the techniques used by the abuser to ensure
compliance and silence

B.3. Signs of Sexual Abuse

The following indicators are not conclusive evidence that abuse is occurring,
unless the child discloses specific details of an abusive experience, which has to be
proven still. Yet, the following symptoms ought to call the attention of a caring adult to
monitor the child’s activities more closely, to pay more attention to his or her
relationships with adults or to talk to the child about your concerns.

B.3.1. Physical Warning Signs:

 Torn, stained or bloody underwear (may indicate injury or trauma)
 Pain, swelling or itching in the genital area, sometimes with vaginal or penile
discharge (may indicate infection, irritation or abuse)

2
Kearney, Dr. R.Timothy, Caring for Sexually Abused Children: A Handbook for Families and Churches,
Downers Grove, 2001, p16.
3
“Sexual Abuse,” Crisis Counseling with Children and Adolescents
4
American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry. 2004.
5
AACA Psychiatry. 2004.
 4

 Pain in urination or defecation, or urinary bleeding (may indicate an injury

secondary to child sexual abuse)
 Sphincter control problems (due to physical damage to muscles in the anal or
vaginal areas or may be anxiety-related due to abuse)
 Pregnancy and venereal disease

B.3.2. Behavioral Warning Signs

 Age-inappropriate sexual behavior (knowledge of words, sexual activities
or role-playing adult sexual encounters may be indicative of having had such
experiences and not a simple manifestation of promiscuity).6
 Use of names for genitalia and other body parts different from those taught
at home or used by family (indicative of having been in a setting where those
names were used in an abusive situation)
 Changes in performance in school (difficulty concentrating, lack of sleep
due to being kept awake at night, sudden dislike or refusal to attend school,
fear of teacher)
 Delinquency or running away
 Sleep disturbances (nightmares, fear of ‘monsters’, bedwetting and
difficulty with going to bed may be indicative of sexual abuse that occurred in
a bedroom or similar setting)
 Changes in eating patterns

B.3.3. Emotional/Relational Warning Signs

 Poor peer relationships (aggressive acting out or protective withdrawal
may be the result of having been sexually abused)
 Fear of certain formerly comfortable people or places
 Regression (acting like a younger child or losing recent gains like toilet
training or the ability to sleep the night through in his or her own bed may be
ways that a child could signal some sort of emotional trauma, including sexual
abuse)
 Anxiety related illness (headache, gastric disturbances, sleep disorders,
eating problems and the like)
 Secretive talk in relationships (withholding certain information about an
issue they brought about to parents or significant adults)
 Poor self-concept (they believe that more than doing something bad, they
became bad themselves by virtue of participation in a forbidden act.
 Depression (change in appetite, sleep disturbance, loss of interest in
previously enjoyed activities, a feeling of emptiness or sadness, loss of energy,
isolating and a wish to avoid life – in extreme cases – a desire to be dead.)

6
Making Children Aware of Their Own Behavior:
Actively listen to the child first and you will find that children believe that they played a part in the
interaction and that they made some choices and had some power.
Children will also show their power by attempting to manipulate the counselor. Implicit behavior is the
expectation that their acts will have an effect on adults. Children need to learn that their acts will have
different effects on different adults.
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 Signs of de-compensation (inability to function at home or school, suicide

attempts and psychotic episodes in which contact with reality is lost).
 The assistance of trained mental health professional is often needed.

B.3.4. Spiritual Signs

 Anger at God (changes in the way that they talk about God or by refusal to
participate in formerly significant religious observances)
 Refusal to pray for a specific person
 Flight into religion (become extremely concerned about the details of
religious rites and practices and seek to please God by “getting it right”
hoping that God would stop the abuse.) eg: excessive time devoted to prayer
or Bible study, overly zealous attendance at church functions and so on.
 Believe that one is uniquely and specially sinful (they may see themselves
as the most bad, most dirty and most sinful of all people).
 Misconstrued theology (molesters may justify their actions biblically)
All these signs and symptoms serve as warnings but none of them in and of
themselves is sufficient to give certainty to a parent or caregiver’s fears that a child may
be in danger. They serve to increase awareness of the fact of child sexual abuse and as
indicators that may be present in children that we know and love.

B.4 Consequences to abused children

Some of the effects in abused children are: physical harm; emotional confusion;
violation of trust and innocence; damage relationships with peers, adults, God

Sexually abused children may develop the following:7

 unusual interest in or avoidance of all things of a sexual nature
 sleep problems or nightmares
 depression or withdrawal from friends or family
 seductiveness
 statements that their bodies are dirty or damaged, or fear that there is something
wrong with them in the genital area
 refusal to go to school/delinquency/conduct problems
 secretiveness
 aspects of sexual molestation in drawings, games, fantasies
 unusual aggressiveness or suicidal behavior
These are some of the issues that a caring adult needs to address.

7
AACA Psychiatry. 2004.
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C. FACTS AND FIGURES:

C.1 Situation of Filipino Children8

It is often said that the kind of society one lives in is mirrored in the lives of its
children. Picture the following:
 There are 32,894,317 children (below 18 years of age) in the Philippines. They
constitute nearly 45 per cent (44.98 per cent) of the total Philippine 1998
population of 73,130,985 (based on the medium growth projection of the NSO,
1995).
 Their age range distribution, proportions and absolute numbers are as follows:
(based on the age range proportions of the 1995 NSO Census).
 Infant mortality rate is pegged at 42.73 per 1,000 live births (Department of
Health, 1 September 1999).
 28% of children under age 5 are severely and moderately underweight based on
international standards (World Summit Goals for Children , 1998).

Age Range Age Proportions Absolute Numbers

0-4 years 13.85% 10,128,641

5-9 years 12.75% 9,324,202
10-14 years 11.64% 8,512,446
15-17 years 6.74% 4,929,028

0-17 years 44.98% 32,894,317

 49% of the total population of infants and 26% of the total population of children
with ages ranging from 1 - 6 years old suffer from iron-deficiency anemia
 There is one (1) hospital for every 113,040 people. There is only 1 doctor for
every 24, 417 people; 1 nurse for every 22,309; 1 dentist for every 578,124; and,
1 midwife for every 722,654 people (Philippine Yearbook of Statistics).
 More than half of the over 42,000 barangays in the country do not have provisions
for a pre-school. Only 19% of children aged 4 to 6 years old are able to go to
public and private pre-schools.
 More than 1/3 of the more than 42,000 barangays in the country could not offer
the required six years of elementary education.
 Sixty percent of the children drop out of school when they reach the second grade
(PDI, 18 May 1997).
 Sixty-one towns in the country do not have a high school.
 It is estimated that there are about five million child laborers in the country
(UNICEF 1995). Two-thirds of them are found in the rural areas.
 There are 1.5 million street children. DSWD estimates that this number increases
annually by 6,365.

8
The following information is courtesy of Child Protection in the Philippines: Philippine Resource
Network., 2000.
 7

 Of the 1.5 million street children, 60,000 are prostituted (ECPAT 1996). The
DSWD claims that the annual average increase of prostituted children is 3,266.
The Philippines is the fourth country with the most number of prostituted children
(Intersect, December 1995).
 Research studies conducted in schools show that for every 3 Filipino children, one
child experiences abuse (Manila Bulletin, 11 February 1996). During the first
semester of 1999 alone, there were 2,393 children who fell prey to rape, attempted
rape, incest, acts of lasciviousness and prostitution (DSWD 1st semester, CY
1999).

The statistics are growing each day. These clearly depict the immense hardship
which Filipino children are subjected to. Unfortunately, the family that is supposedly the
primary source of the children's sense of trust and security is itself beleaguered. In most
instances, it can no longer adequately provide even the children's most basic needs like
food, education, housing, and an atmosphere of love, affection and nurturance. Its
capacity to protect the children and enhance their development and participation rights is
likewise affected.

C.2 Child Abuse Statistics in the Philippines

Of 32 million children9
17, 929 are abused10
60,000 are prostituted11
1.5 million are living on the streets12
5 million are child laborers13

DETAILED CHILD ABUSE STATISTICS

9
UNICEF, "State of the World's Children 2001", (1 February 2001).
10
DSWD and PNP statistics, 1999
11
ECPAT, 1996
12
DSWD, 1998
13
UNICEF, 1995
 8

CATEGORY DSWD (1997-1999) PNP (1998-1999) CPU (1997-1999)

TOTAL NUMBER OF
26,44614 10335 1575
ABUSED CHILDREN
SEXUALLY ABUSED15 11,262 714916 1033
PHYSICALLY ABUSED 4085 2072 211
PHYSICALLY AND
- - 75
SEXUALLY ABUSED
NEGLECTED 5331 124 46
UNABLE TO VALIDATE - - 210

C.3 UP-PGH Child Protection Unit

2000 STATISTICS

C.4. Types of Abuse

14
Includes abandoned children, child laborers, child trafficking and victims of armed conflict
15
Includes victims of pedophilia, pornography, and prostitution
16
Includes rape and acts of lasciviousness
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C.5 Referrals

REFERRAL SOURCE

REFERRAL SOURCE 1997 1998 1999 2000

PGH 44% 37% 30% 24%

LGU SOCIAL WELFARE OFFICES 14% 18% 17% 12%

OTHER GOVT OFFICES/UNITS 15% 7% 7% 5%

POLICE 7% 16% 20% 19%

NGOS/SHELTERS 10% 11% 12% 18%

OTHERS 10% 11% 14% 22%

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C.6 Perpetrator Information

Studies on who commits child sexual abuse vary in their findings, but the most
common finding is that the majority of sexual offenders are family members or are
otherwise known to the child. Sexual abuse by strangers is not nearly as common as
sexual abuse by family members. Research further shows that men perpetrate most
instances of sexual abuse, but there are cases in which women are the offenders. Despite
a common myth, homosexual men are not more likely to sexually abuse children than
heterosexual men are. 17

17
AACA Psychiatry, 2004.
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D. CHURCH TEACHINGS18

According to the Romanian Catholic Diocese of Canton, one of the gravest ills of
today's society continues to be the suffering of the innocent. The human family, with the
various communities comprising it, has the duty to engage itself to alleviate the pain
caused by any such horrifying event, to repair any damage caused where crimes are
committed against such feeble and tender beings, to make sure that they will never
reoccur, while also protecting the reputation of the individuals who may be subject to
inaccurate or even false allegations.
As part of the human society, while being also "sacrament-sign" (Cf. Lumen
Gentium §1) of Salvation, Holy Mother Church has engaged herself deeply in this
process.
Sexual abuse of children is akin to rape cases and and/or incest. In effect, the
teachings of the Church regarding these two immoral acts may also apply to child sexual
abuse. But due to its nature, circumstances, scope and frequency, the growing awareness
of child sexual abuse alarmingly begs for attention and particular response.
Materials on child sexual abuse from official church teachings are, by and large,
connected with the scandals of the clergy that rocked the Roman Catholic Church at the
turn of the millennium. Mostly are normative in nature dealing with ecclesiastical and
civil processes as well as the disciplinary methods for erring priests. The moral principles
operative were not and cannot be easily deduced from such documents. There is,
however, an enlightening discussion in the book of Vincent Genovesi that presents a
paradigm on “The Misuse of Sexuality.” 19 The concept of vulnerability is used which is
apt description for the violation that happens to both the victim and perpetrator of child
sexual abuse.

Sexuality and Vulnerability

Karen Lebacqz considered sexuality as “a form of vulnerability and is to be

valued as such. Sex, eros, passion are antidotes to the human sin of wanting to be in
control or to have power over another.”20 Genovesi, thus, propounded on the idea: “True
love relationships are born only from within the mutual vulnerability that makes human
intimacy possible. Truly loving relationship provides the only proper context for the
expression of genital sexuality, it follows that human manifestations of sexual activity
must themselves be rooted in an appropriate level of vulnerability.”21
Genovesi quotes Lebacqz further: “Any exercise of sexuality that violates
appropriate vulnerability is wrong…” thus… “a violation of the partner’s vulnerability
and a violation of one’s own vulnerability.” In effect, “any sexual encounter that hurts
another, so that she or he either guard against vulnerability in the future or is unduly
vulnerable in the future,” are absolutely wrong. “Sex is not ‘just for fun’ or for play or for
18
The following materials are mostly lifted directly from V. Genovesi’s book: In Pursuit of Love.
19
Vincent J. Genovesi, In Pursuit of Love: Catholic Morality and Human Sexuality Second Edition,
Philippines: Jesuit Communications Foundation, Inc. 2003. pp. 127-
20
“Appropriate Vulnerability: A Sexual Ethic for Singles,” The Christian Century 104 (May 6, 1987) 434-
38 at 437.
21
Genovesi, pp. 127.
 12

phycial release, for showing off, or for any of a host of other human emotions and
expressions that are often attached to sexuality.”22 Child Sexual Abuse, though not
explicitly discussed by Genovesi, may fall under Sexual Assault alongside adultery,
prostitution, pornography and rape which he discussed at length in his book.23
The Catechism of the Catholic Church 24 2356 indirectly treats child sexual
abuse as it defines the moral evil of rape: “Rape is the forcible violation of the sexual
intimacy of another person. It does injury to justice and charity. Rape deeply wounds the
respect, freedom and physical and moral integrity to which every person has a right. It
cause grave damage that can mark thee victim for life. It is always an intrinsically evil
act. Graver still is the rape of children by parents (incest) or those responsible for the
education of the children entrusted to them.”
Following the concept of Lebacqz, Genovesi considers “the act of rape… as
primarily meant to dominate, subjugate, and humiliate its victim.”25 Applying these
children even magnifies the gravity of the act.
As in the usual case of child sexual abuse, rape involves the use of threat of
physical violence, it is necessary to insist that all sexual activity arising from any form of
coercion – emotional, intellectual, or physical – is morally wrong. It assaults the
personal dignity of everyone involved and betrays both our humanity and our
Christianity.26

Scriptures

An argument from the scriptures against child sexual abuse using the passage of
Luke 17:1-2 is not lacking from the materials that the researcher had collected. There are
similar admonishments in the Holy Scriptures about inducing others to sin; especially, the
innocent ones. Although, the researcher has his own reservation 27 regarding the
interpretation of the mentioned passage, nonetheless, it provides a warning to perpetrators
from the Jesus Christ himself.
The passage reads: “Things that cause sin will inevitably occur, but woe to the
person through whom they occur. It would be better for him if a millstone were put
around his neck and he be thrown into the sea than for him to cause one of these little
ones to sin.”
Part of the original text issued for Worldwide Ecclesiastical Distribution on
November, 1996 in Texas, U.S.A by The M+G+R Foundation are as follows:

Little ones mean children as well as innocent adults. In the case of children the
seriousness of the sin is compounded because they are humans under development. The
factors affecting such development will color their entire lives... Abortion, which is
without question a most serious transgression against a loving God, only kills the body of
a little one but not his soul. However, inducing a little one to sin through any
22
Ibid.
23
Specifically on the fourth chapter of Genovesi’s book, A Context for the Meaning and Morality of
Sexuality.
24
Catechism of the Catholic Church
25
Genovesi, pp. 131.
26
Ibidem.
27
Little ones… refer to the little Christian Community.
 13

manifestation of child sexual abuse may result in the death of his body and his soul.
More so than with any other moral sin.

E. Pastoral Implications

Religious leaders, both lay and clergy, who make it known that they are aware of
the nature and extent of child abuse are more readily approached by victims, other family
members, and, at times, even the perpetrators of child abuse.28

E.1 Common Issues Connected to Child Sexual Abuse

Helping Children and Families While Caring for Caregivers29

Focus: what families need as their reaction to child sexual abuse unfolds, and how
the pastoral staff and others in their church can respond in a way that lives out the biblical
mandate to “bear one another’s burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ.”

Issue 1: Isolation
Parents must keep up the usual way of treating their children, while adding
whatever special attention is needed to help the abused child. Friends and those who seek
to minister to these children and their families should do the same.
Abused children should in the normal activities of the community and treated as
they would have been treated if the abuse were still a secret. If the children manifest
unacceptable behavior among peers, caring adults must target the elimination of such
behavior.
The resources available in Christ may be of special values in these situations. The
power of the Holy Spirit working in a child or family through the prayer of fellow
believers must not be underestimated.
Ephesians 3:20-21 reminds us of: “him who is able to do immeasurably more than
all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us.”
Confession and Eucharist have a powerful psychological cleansing and restoration
effect on people as well as a spiritual import.
The Church needs to reach out to them and enfold them back into the community.
Let the families know that they are welcome.

Issue 2: Labeling and Gossip

The damage done to children and their families when rumors are believed and
gossip spread is incalculable. The Christian community must not repeat the damage at a
time when abused children and their families are depending on their community for help
and support.

28
A Center for the Prevention of Sexual and Domestic Violence. Seattle Washington, 1992.
29
Kearney, Dr. R.Timothy, Caring for Sexually Abused Children: A Handbook for Families and Churches,
Downers Grove, Illinois: InterVarsity Press, 2001.
 14

Counseling and prayer support should be offered as necessary.

Church leadership and those in ministry to sexually abused children and their
families must avoid sliding into dealing with stereotypes rather than real people.
Be certain to asses the impact on each family member in each situation, and do not be too
quick to think that you know what must be happening.

Issue 3: Loyalties
It is generally preferable for either the victim or the alleged abuser to attend a
different church, at least while the investigation is conducted.
When conflicting loyalties arise, parties supporting both sides must be reminded
that they are not the ones conducting the investigation and that it is not their place to
judge or condemn wither side of the conflict.

Issue 4: Symptoms
Be sensitive to the symptoms shown by the child and talk with him or her
privately. If sexual abuse is suspected, then, seek for professional help.

Issue 5: Response of Others

Extended family and friends need to deal with their emotions and reactions on
their own time and not impose them on the abuse victim’s family, seeking instead to be
supportive and minister the love of Christ into that family’s pain.

Issue 6: Shame and Guilt

Shame has to do with who a person is. Guilt has to do with things a person has
done. These issues will emerge in the family of a child sexual abuse victim and for the
child. Their concerns should be listened to supportively, and then addressed in the light of
reality.
It is important to help them differentiate between true guilt and false guilt. True
guilt is based upon actions knowingly taken that resulted in harm to others. False guilt is
a reaction to the horror of the situation and is often tied to a wish that things had been
different along with a belief that one should have done something wrong to make them
so.
Paul’s teaching in Roman 8 that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of
God can help those who are feeling uniquely sinful and unforgivable for either real or
false guilt.
Those who believe that there is no hope for them to be forgiven can often find
reassurance in the sorry of the prodigal son recounted in Luke 15 and the fact that the
father sought out his child while the child was still far off. The distinction of the son’s
guilt was the result of his own choice, whereas the victim’s or family’s guilt is the result
of the actions of others, does not seem to matter to people feeling separated from God.
They may find comfort in the fact that even in the case of objective guilt (unlike their
own) God is able to forgive.
The reality that Christ came into the world to save sinners (1 Tim 1:15) can often
remind people that the separation from God they feel is die to their own issues, not to
God’s having changed his opinion of them. God’s loving initiatives toward humanity can
bring relief from both guilt and shame, and counseling and prayer ministries that use
 15

these truths as a foundation can have a profound impact on abuse victims and their
families.

E.2 FAQs (Frequently Asked Questions)

Focus: Six of the most common questions in the light of biblical data and the
psychological realities faced by those asking the questions. Biblical authors show us real
people in Scriptures who question, struggle and cry out to God. One of the ways we show
respect to people as we seek to help them is to value both their questions and the quality
of our interaction with them. It is better to simply lend a listening ear and leave a door
open for future conversations.

Question 1: Why Dos God Let These Things Happen?

Words of Scripture that we can offer to those struggling with this issue.
God desires good for his people. “I know the plans I have for you… plans for
your welfare and not for harm,” declares God (Jer 29:11)
But why he allows evil to befall his people and especially innocents such as
children who have been sexually abused?
The question seeks to plumb the motives of God, but the answer is not found
there. We must, rather, seek to know the person of God and what he desires for the people
he has created. God wants us to follow his ways and not to follow the deceitfulness of our
own hearts. “…to act justly and to love mercy and walk humbly with their God.” (Mic
6:8) God has always allowed sin, yet he hates evil. God does not allow evil per se, he
allows human the choice of evil and good.
The question is not, then, why God allows evil, but why people choose not seek
after God and his ways.
Romans 7:19-25: “What I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not
want to do – this I keep on doing… Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks
be to God – through Jesus Christ.”

Does God care? And if he does, why doesn’t he make it better?

Romans 8:28. Faith comes in. We do not pretend that there is no pain or no evil
deed has been done, but we hold on to the conviction the good will come out of it at some
point down the road. And we keep walking forward, secure in the fact the God is walking
the road with us and he knows the end right from the beginning. (Is 46:10)
“There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain” (Rev 21:4) as to
where Christians are headed – the new Jerusalem. Offering Christian counsel can put the
pain of the present in the context of eternity and remind those who are suffering that this
life is, after all, only transitory, and the eternal rewards will far outweigh any current
suffering. Good will find ways to use it for good.

Question 2: Is God Punishing the Child or the Adults?

If the family considers the Bible as a teaching authority, then consider John 9,
where Jesus and the disciples discuss an issue of who is to blame for tragedy affecting a
seemingly innocent man.
 16

Speculations as to the sin of the victim or family members will not lead to a
quicker or longer-lasting cure.
A counselor can help a family understand that the abuse was not set up by God to
punish for past sins. The false idea of God as a vengeful deity who was just waiting for
the chance to hit them with abuse needs to be dispelled to that they can turn to him for
support as they walk through this difficult time.

Question 3: How come I Can’t Trust God Anymore?

Those to whom this sort of tragedy is new are likely to have their faith stretched
and maybe even broken by dealing with the reality that God could allow such abuse to
occur to a child. This event may crush their faith in God.
When counseling with people who have lost their trust in God, a first step is to
listen while they talk about how they lost it. Don’t rush too quickly with biblical
platitudes, or you run the risk of their feeling that you have not taken their despair
seriously. You need not leave them in the midst of their darkness without offering some
hope. After listening, remind them of truths about God’s faithfulness that they already
know but are not currently feeling.

Question 4: Had God Abandoned Me?

Along with the lack of trust, they feel abandoned by God. Some reason that God
is punishing them, others that God is not able to protect the innocent children, so what
hope do we have as sinners? Others feel dirty or unworthy because of having been
molested that they are sure that God could not tolerate being with them any longer.
God in no way abandons his people. He is “an ever-present help in trouble”
(Psalm 46:1). Nothing can separate us from God’s love (Romans 8).
Help people understand biblically that they are not alone.
Challenge a reliance upon feelings.
Provide the living presence of Jesus in his body, the Church, to assure people that
they are not alone.
If we meet them and care for them in Jesus’ name, they are more likely to know
that he is with them too.

Question 5: Is God Angry at Me or Can He Forgive Me for Feeling This Way?

Opening their minds and hearts to the reality that God is big enough to handle
their feelings (in fact, may be the only one big enough to fully handle their feelings) can
be the beginning of healing.
Biblical authors knew this truth, often lost to contemporary believers. Encourage
them to read the book of Psalms. The psalm itself sometimes documents how telling God
can change the feeling.
As we understand better, feelings can change. People may move from anger to
sorrow that they misjudged God.
Sin angers God, as does disobedience. But feelings do not, and forgiveness is
freely given.
 17

Question 6: Will It Ever Get Any Better?

The answer is two-fold – in the short term, probably, with work; in the long term,
definitely, by God’s grace.
When people despair at feeling separated from God, in the midst of a
psychological depression and a spiritual desert, we can point them toward practices and
principles that will help them out of the valley, but we must not promise a quick fix or
devalue them by discounting the depth of their pain.
The long-term outlook – viewed from the longest perspective possible, eternity –
is a good one. The picture of the New Jerusalem in the book of Revelation, the ultimate
destination for all believers, is of a land where there is no more sorrow or grief, no more
tears or crying as described in Revelation 21.30

Awareness of the danger of child sexual abuse and the steps needed to increase
safety and assist children and families need to be integrated into the life of the Church.
I hope that the information and suggestions given here will help many people, as
they deal with the trauma of child sexual abuse, to see a future beyond their immediate
pain. Healing does come. No matter how difficult the circumstances, there is hope.

E.3 Dealing with Perpetrators/Abusers

The following materials are lifted from an article by Sarah Harte that provides a
complete picture of the reality and consequences of child abuse by understanding and
considering the perpetrator, as well as a critique on our own moral standards in dealing
with abusers as such.

E.3.1 Silence: A Feature31

There is a certain conspiracy of silence in cases of child sexual abuse concerning
priests and religious in as much as in domestic cases since few if any of these come to
public notice.
If any had come to light, society would not have known what to do about them,
apart form protecting the child and removing him from the home. The idea that such
actions were criminal is scarcely recognized at all and even if the police had been
involved, they wouldn’t have known what to do about them either.
The silence might be explained by the fact that few had any appreciation of the
damage done by this form of abuse: betrayal of trust, the traumatization of their sexual
lives that leads to the inability to form intimate sexual relationships.
Where priests or religious were involved, the victim’s relationship with God and
the ritual practices of their religious and spiritual lives were often distorted or destroyed.
Even the symbols of religion could become an object of hate.

30
The Seventh Chapter of the Book entitled: How Does God Bring Healing? Provides Methods and
Manners of Healing for Child Sexual Abuse. (Kearney)
31
Sarah Harte, p48.
 18

E.3.2 Explaining or Understanding the abuse32

1. Some experts suggest that this behavior is linked to the immature sexual
development of the perpetrator. Being unable to form adult sexual relationships, the
abuser becomes fixated on children and deceives himself that the child does enjoys his
sexual advances and actions. This explains why some abusers cannot acknowledge that
their actions are wrong, and are deeply resistant to change.
2. Others interpret sexual abuse as an abuse of power. Accordingly, power mean
having authority over the child who puts the child in a position of dependence and
weakness vis-à-vis the abuser, and this increases the child’s vulnerability to him. In this
case, the sexual character of the abuse remains the same, though it does add to the evil
and trauma experienced by the child. One should be cautious in using the ‘power’
explanation since it tends to be gender based on the supposition that men are the abusers.
When women are the abusers it is their ‘powerlessness’ that is usually invoked as an
explanation.
3. Some explain sexual abuse in terms of moral weakness or even moral
corruption. The abuser is either incapable of setting limits to his desires, or is so morally
depraved that he can no longer make any distinction between good and evil. It is
important, however, that we do not confuse these two types of abuser. There is a
widespread opinion in our society that all abusers are of the depraved kind and this
justifies our seeking harsh barbaric punishments while doing nothing to help them
change.

E.3.3 Possibility for Change33

There is a disagreement among the experts on this issue. Some suggest that many
(perhaps majority) can indeed change by an appropriate therapy or re-educational
programme. This is especially the case with adolescent abusers. Even those of mature age
can be helped to overcome their behavior and cease to be a threat to children.
However, the same experts consider some abusers may never change.
We should never forget the human capacity for hope and renewal. The tragedy for
both the abuser and the society is that there is very little of this help available and abusers
continue to be rejected, even reviled, by society at large.

E.3.4 Mercy and Forgiveness34

This is both a dangerous and sad position. It is dangerous because it is vengeful,
and revenge tends to multiply the evil which drives it. It is sad because it denies the
abuser all mercy and forgiveness. It is a very unchristian attitude and could be as harmful
to society as the original evil. Mercy is love transforming evil, both physical and moral,
into good and we refuse that wonderful moral gift to others at our peril.
If we refuse to mercy then we, too, can become abusers in another way. This
revengeful attitude is directed not only against sex abusers but also against prisoners in
general. It prevents us from making a radical critique of the role of prisons in our society.
There are many people who feel strongly, that where, for example, incest if the
form of sex abuse, prison may be the worst form of punishment; it can add guilt and

32
Ibid., p49.
33
Ibid., p50.
34
Ibid.
 19

confusion to the child who may feel responsible for the break up of the home. This is just
an example of an issue which a pastor or caring adult must address. We also need to
examine the role of the courts in these cases likewise.
A rethinking of our attitudes to prisons in general and to the sex abuser in
particular is important. Such people are reviled in our society. Perhaps they serve the
necessary role of scapegoat for our own moral superiority; a truth very clearly stated by
our pagan forbears: “We cannot claim to be compassionate unless we share the shame of
those who are most reviled.”

E.3.5 Abused - The Most Important Person35

For many years, children had to suffer in silence. Now that the silence is broken,
there is still a great deal of confusion about how best to help them. The demands, which
they express themselves, are for counseling, compensation and an apology from society.
While the government is expected to come up with measures that help the abused
transform their lives in a creative way, such measures could also be a cause for the
abusers to become fixated in a victimhood which may become another form of abuse that
will stultify the rest of their lives.

E.3.6 Innocent Person Accused of Abuse36

Accusations of this crime cling to the accused in ways that no other accusation
does. It may well be that this crime will become the locus of great injustices in the future.
‘There is no smoke without fire’ justifies, even good and fair people, in nourishing their
suspicions against all the evidence. Few, apart from family and friends, will shed any
tears for those whose innocence remains tarnished by false accusations.

E.4 Government Initiatives37

Republic Act No. 7610 provides for stronger deterrence and special protection
against child abuse, exploitation and discrimination. The Philippines is a signatory to the
Convention on the Rights of the Child. 38 The convention categories the rights of the child
35
Ibid., p51.
36
Ibid.
37
Nereo C. Lujan, PDI Visayas Bureau, Philippine Daily Inquirer, 2 March 1996.
38
Convention on the Rights of the Child - Adopted and opened for signature, ratification and
accession by General Assembly resolution 44/25 of 20 November 1989 entry into force 2
September 1990, in accordance with article 49.
Article 19
1. States Parties shall take all appropriate legislative, administrative, social and educational measures to
protect the child from all forms of physical or mental violence, injury or abuse, neglect or negligent
treatment, maltreatment or exploitation, including sexual abuse, while in the care of parent(s), legal
guardian(s) or any other person who has the care of the child.
2. Such protective measures should, as appropriate, include effective procedures for the establishment of
social programmes to provide necessary support for the child and for those who have the care of the child,
as well as for other forms of prevention and for identification, reporting, referral, investigation, treatment
and follow-up of instances of child maltreatment described heretofore, and, as appropriate, for judicial
involvement.
Article 34
 20

as those of survival (right to life, basic needs), appropriate information, protection

(safeguards against all forms of abuse, neglect and exploitation) and participation
(expression of opinion).
Most parents and children are not fully aware of these laws and regulations.
Adults think that children, not being of legal age, have no rights other than those that
adults would grant them. But that is not so. Children have rights. And children need
special protection by the state and society precisely because they are of tender age.
The social welfare department, with the help of the media, is trying to increase
awareness of the rights of the child. A continuing information campaign should impress
people all over the nation that children have rights and because they are weak, vulnerable
and often defenseless, they need greater protection. Public discussion of child rights and
issues should also drum up awareness of the problem of child abuse and exploitation.
Families, the Church, schools, community groups, NGO’s and other institutions should
be encouraged to exercise constant vigilance in protecting children. And people should be
told that cases of child abuse can be reported through a referral network.
Simultaneous with the information campaign, efforts will have to be made to act
on factors that give rise to child abuse, such as alcoholism, drug addiction, the
proliferation of pornographic material, the breakdown of the family, the absence of the
mother, lack of privacy at home and the deterioration of values. And the children-victims
and their relatives should be convinced to forget their ‘hiya’ (shame) and denounce and
prosecute offenders so that they may not victimize other children again.
Other children need our love, our protection, our concern. They are our nation’s
future. We will be building a stronger, healthier, happier nation if we protect their rights
and safeguard them from abuse and exploitation now.

… Addenda

F. Protecting Children From Sexual Abuse39

F.1 What Parents Need to Consider:

1. The typical advice "Don't Talk to Strangers" doesn't apply in this case. Most
sexual perpetrators are known to their victims.
2. Do not instruct children to give relatives hugs and kisses. Let them express
affection on their own terms.
3. Teach your children basic sexual education. Teach them that no one should touch
the "private" parts of their body. A health professional can also help to
communicate sex education to children if parents are uncomfortable doing so.

States Parties undertake to protect the child from all forms of sexual exploitation and sexual abuse. For
these purposes, States Parties shall in particular take all appropriate national, bilateral and multilateral
measures to prevent:
(a) The inducement or coercion of a child to engage in any unlawful sexual activity;
(b) The exploitative use of children in prostitution or other unlawful sexual practices;
(c) The exploitative use of children in pornographic performances and materials.
39
American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry. 2004.
 21

4. Develop strong communication skills with your children. Encourage them to ask
questions and talk about their experiences. Explain the importance of reporting
abuse to you or another trusted adult.
5. Teach your children that sexual advances from adults are wrong and against the
law. Give them the confidence to assert themselves against any adult who
attempts to abuse them.
6. Make an effort to know children's friends and their families.
7. Instruct your child to never get into a car with anyone without your permission.
8. Teach your children that their bodies are their own. That it is OK to say they do
not want a hug or that certain kinds of contact make them uncomfortable.
9. It is important to remember that physical force is often not necessary to engage a
child in sexual activity. Children are trusting and dependent and will often do
what is asked of them to gain approval and love.

F.2 Basic Prevention Concepts to Teach Children40

1. Your body is special and belongs only to you.
2. You have a right to control who touches you and how. No one has a right to touch
your private parts without your permission, and the only reason that a grown-up
should ask to touch your private pats is for health and hygiene, if that grown-up is
a doctor or nurse.
3. Trust your feelings about people and touches.
4. You have a right to say “NO” to anybody or anything that hurts, frightens or
confuses you. Even if the grown-up is someone you respect or trust. Know how to
say “NO” like you mean it.
5. You have a right to ask questions about puzzling adult behavior and have them
taken seriously.
6. Secrets that make you feel bad, scared or confused should be told. If anybody
wants you to keep a secret about touching or about anything that makes you feel
uncomfortable, tell a grown-up right away.
7. If the person tells you don’t seem to listen to you, tell somebody else. Keep telling
until you get help.
8. If anybody does touch you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, or says
anything to you that makes you feel bad or scared, or wants to show you
something or make you do something you don’t want to do, remember – it is not
your fault. Get away as fast as you can, and tell a grown-up right away.

G. Responding to Child Sexual Abuse

When a child tells an adult that he or she has been sexually abused, the adult may feel
uncomfortable and may not know what to say or do. The following guidelines should be
used when responding to children who say they have been sexually abused:

G.1 What to Say: If a child even hints in a vague way that sexual abuse has occurred,
encourage him or her to talk freely. Don't make judgmental comments.
40
Committee for Children – Seattle
 22

 Show that you understand and take seriously what the child is saying. Child and
adolescent psychiatrists have found that children who are listened to and
understood do much better than those who are not. The response to the disclosure
of sexual abuse is critical to the child's ability to resolve and heal the trauma of
sexual abuse.
 Assure the child that they did the right thing in telling. A child who is close to the
abuser may feel guilty about revealing the secret. The child may feel frightened if
the abuser has threatened to harm the child or other family members as
punishment for telling the secret.
 Tell the child that he or she is not to blame for the sexual abuse. Most children in
attempting to make sense out of the abuse will believe that somehow they caused
it or may even view it as a form of punishment for imagined or real wrongdoings.

 Finally, offer the child protection, and promise that you will promptly take steps
to see that the abuse stops. Being careful not to make promises that cannot be
kept, the hearer will seek to identify fears and reassures when possible, working
to keep the child safe.41

G.2 What to Do

G.2.1 Report any suspicion of child abuse. If the abuse is within the family, report it to
the local Child Protection Agency. If the abuse is outside of the family, report it to the
police or district attorney's office. Individuals reporting in good faith are immune from
prosecution. The agency receiving the report will conduct an evaluation and will take
action to protect the child.
Parents should consult with their pediatrician or family physician, who may refer
them to a physician who specializes in evaluating and treating sexual abuse. The
examining doctor will evaluate the child's condition and treat any physical problem
related to the abuse, gather evidence to help protect the child, and reassure the child that
he or she is all right.
Children who have been sexually abused should have an evaluation by a child and
adolescent psychiatrist or other qualified mental health professional to find out how the
sexual abuse has affected them, and to determine whether ongoing professional help is
necessary for the child to deal with the trauma of the abuse. The child and adolescent
psychiatrist can also provide support to other family members who may be upset by the
abuse.
While most allegations of sexual abuse made by children are true, some false
accusations may arise in custody disputes and in other situations. Occasionally, the court
will ask a child and adolescent psychiatrist to help determine whether the child is telling
the truth, or whether it will hurt the child to speak in court about the abuse.
When a child is asked as to testify, special considerations--such as videotaping, frequent
breaks, exclusion of spectators, and the option not to look at the accused--make the
experience much less stressful.
Adults, because of their maturity and knowledge, are always the ones to blame
when they abuse children. The abused children should never be blamed.
41
The researcher inserted this statement to emphasize the need not to make false promises on the victim.
 23

When a child tells someone about sexual abuse, a supportive, caring response is the first
step in getting help for the child and reestablishing their trust in adults.

G.2.2 After hearing a disclosure

Assess the safety of the child and take necessary steps to make sure he or she is
not at immediate risk of harm in retaliation for disclosure.
If there are open wounds, bleeding or other physical symptoms – provide
emergency medical care or arrange transport to an urgent care medical center.
In the absence of wounds… assess the situation and look for the answer to the
following questions:

1. With whom will the child be going home? (Determine how great the risk that
the child will be abused again or retaliated against for telling) If you don’t feel it is safe
for the child to go home with the parent or adult guardian who brought him or her, you
need to call the police or a social service agency.
2. Who else knows about the alleged abuse? (1. To determine who is available to
the child as a support system to help cope with what has happened and with the changes
that having told will bring. 2. To know if a parent or guardian is already aware)
If the child identified other children who are aware of the abuse or are victims
themselves, it may be necessary to reach out to them as well.
3. Is there a history of irrational or unsafe behavior on the part of the parent or
guardian or others who have access to the child? (its important to know if those adult
involved have histories that indicate substance abuse, mental illness or previous erratic
behavior.)
What does the child think will happen next now he or she has told about what occurred?
(we seek to understand the child’s fears and concerns, as well as hoping to get an insight
into the working of the family system to which the child will be returning.) Reminders of
the truth of God can give them a foundation to stand on as they deal with the aftermath of
having disclosed child sexual abuse).
4. How and by whom should the parent or guardian be informed of what the child
said?
In the case where the person whom the child confides is a friend or family
member, most often that person will be the one to talk to the parent.
In an institutional setting like a church, school or social agency, the written
protocol for management of abuse-related issues should spell out how to handle this. A
supervisor or another trained person should help in the process of formulating the
message of the hearer in telling the story.

G.2.3 Meeting the needs of others involved (including those who are aware of the issue)
1. Other children do not need to know the details of what may have been alleged.
If there are some children who appear to be disturbed of the situation, comfort them and
assist them formulate a response to help them to deal with their fears. At the same time,
be keenly aware of the possibility that they might have the same traumatic experience
which could have been triggered by the issue of another child.
 24

2. Children in families also need some kind of general explanation of what is

going on, especially if they see the adults in their world upset and angry. Give them
assurance that the problem is being taken cared of.
3. Family members, friends or staff at churches or schools often need support in
dealing with their own feelings that are aroused by the allegations. It may be feelings of
their own abusive experiences or times of failing to protect others under their care or
concerns about current issues that can no longer be ignored when confronted with the
enormity of the abuse allegations made. Firstly, simply acknowledge with them the
presence of these feelings. Secondly, provide an emotional safe place and a skilled person
to listen and help them process what has happened.
4. Keep those involved abreast of developments – what has happened and what
will happen next.
5. Finally, others in the community or family may not know how best to respond
to those whose family has been rocked by child sexual abuse allegations. But they can
give their support in a number of ways. Offering errands, cook meals, clean the house and
the like. Even after the immediate shock of the discovery, the family will need tender
loving care as they go through the social and legal systems.

G.2.4 Report Child Sexual Abuse through these Local Agencies:

DSWD NCR 734-8617/734-8635

DSWD Quezon City 927-1588/927-1580
Police - Quezon City 922-6726/922-5533
DSWD Manila 528-0619/527-5042
DSWD San Juan 726-8556/724-4736
DSWD Mandaluyong 532-4198/532-2224
Police Mandaluyong 532-2318
HOPE Worldwide, Inc. 551-8073/551-9230
Bantay Bata 163
ADNET 287-0163
Child Hope Asia 563-4647
CPU-PGH 526-8418
CRIBS, Inc. 681-5921
CWC 743-8374
Door of Hope 867-1991
ECPAT Phils. 433-5527
ERDA Tech Foundation 564-1774
Lunduyan 911-7867
PCNPC 510-1378
SAGIP, Inc. 862-0065
Salinlahi Foundation 922-3982
Serra’s Center for Girls 524-4083
SPECS Foundation 512-5707
STOP 563-9301
Sun for all Children 563-0601
Tahanan ng Sta. Lucia 854-3424
 25

Tugon-AdeMu 896-1017
WCC 924-9315
Virlanie Foundation 896-2289
CPTCSA 927-7847/414-4761

Or to the nearest Barangay Hall.

 26

Sources:

Harte, Sarah, “Child Abuse Reflecting on a problem as old as the hills,” Spirituality 10/7
January-February 2004 No. 34.

Kearney, Dr. R.Timothy, Caring for Sexually Abused Children: A Handbook for Families
and Churches, Downers Grove, Illinois: InterVarsity Press, 2001.

Ornum, William Van and John B. Mordock, Crisis Counseling with Children and
Adolescents: A Guide for Non-Professional Counselors,” New Expanded Edition, New
York: The Crossroad Publishing Company, 1994.

Internet Sources:

“Understanding Child Sexual Abuse” Education, Prevention, and Recovery. American

Psychological Association – Public Affairs. 2001.

Child Sexual Abuse. American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, 2004

Facts and Figures. Child Protection in the Philippines: Philippine Resource Network.,
2000.

Recommended Materials:
Marie M. Fortune. Forgiveness: The Last Step. An unpublished paper.