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Eric B. Santiago
Dr. Schuster
in its 91st season there are 32 teams and is generally considered the most popular game in
Comment: Avoid run-ons.
America. It is always full of thrill and heartbreak and always has their fans on the edge of
their seats. However very recently there has been a shadow over the NFL and that is the
ever-growing emergence of concussions in the game. The players are bigger and faster
Comment: Write out fifteen.
then they were say only 15 years ago, so with this comes bigger collisions and even more
harmful injuries. Players often suffered concussions but would never come out the game
due to either not wanting to let their team down or team doctors lacking sufficient
training in concussions. Most players still carry the old school mentality of just getting
their bell rung and wanting to go back in the game, and so some feel they should be able
to go right back in the game if they feel fine. However, many are misinformed of the
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dangers of going back into the game and players should have to miss at least 1 game and
Right now in the NFL if the player is able to pass concussion tests they are able to
make an appearance and start in the next game. This is absolutely ridiculous because if a
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player were to suffer another concussion while still recovering from another the dangers
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are quite life threatening. Receiving constants blows to the head is never a good thing,
boxers have to sit out at least 30 days when suffering a concussion yet if a player passes a
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test on the sidelines he will be in on the next play possible. Two main brain injuries that
retired NFL players suffer from are dementia and Alzheimer’s disease and these players
Comment: Source?
suffer at five times the rate higher then the national average. A lot of these players played
when the game turned real nasty and physical and that was in the late 1960’s and early
1970’s. They played while the rules were not really enforced and now in their 60’s these
players are paying quite the price as many are already in the late stages of the two
aforementioned diseases.
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Yet with all these facts there is still the mentality of that it happens, which to a clearly. That what happens?
certain extent is true. Yes dangerous head to head collisions are going to happen, there is
nothing the League can do to prevent this without making it flag football. When a fan or
player reads the quote at the end of this upcoming passage one has to wonder:
diseases at five times or more the national rate, Aiello said, “There are
“Memory disorders affect many people who never played football or other
Even with the facts in his face Greg Aiello (a league spokesman) was in a way able to
blow off the facts as unimportant. His approach and philosophy is very similar to tobacco
executives for example if a tobacco executive is given the clear cut facts about how lung
cancer and tobacco are correlated, he would most likely say well people who do not
smoke also get lung cancer. Now this is very true in that concussions happen from not
playing football and lung cancer from not smoking, but they are overlooking that there is
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still dangerous elements to their respective business. The NFL will not admit this but one
could easily feel that they are more concerned with money then health of their players. It
seems as if they will almost do anything to keep their star players on the field because
head collisions as players are now being fined or even suspended for their actions.
Comment: A comma usually follows
However some players fine some fault with this as some feel this is “softening” up the However.
game and others feel they are the scapegoat for this new policy such as Pittsburgh
Steelers Linebacker James Harrison, as he has been fined three times this year for his
hits. Always known for his rough style of play James feels he has to become a player he
is not and almost considered retiring if he had to keep paying fines. His concerns are
valid and not much can be done to change his playing style. At this point in his career he
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has been playing since he was probably 7 years old so he has been playing for at least 20
years. This can be changed though with the upcoming generation of football players, the
PAL coaches and other programs can teach children how to avoid hitting another player
by simply just putting their head into it. This will not eliminate all injuries of football but
constant reminder from when they are young to even the higher levels can most certainly
The NFL is doing what they can to change the game of football so that it is less
harmful. There is always going to be injuries as there are injuries in any other sport. Just
recently the NFL has proposed to extend to an 18 game season, which means an even
bigger amount of injuries could occur. This propositon does not make too much sense at a
time of concerns with concussions because by extending the season there is even more
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chances for such a serious injury to occur. Once again this all comes down to money as
the NFL is trying to gain more money off the meaningless preseason games that are
played. It is not worth the extra couple millions that the team earns then possibly
damaging a couple players brains for the rest of their life. Ask former New England
Patriot Linebacker Ted Johnson (major advocate for retired players who feel they should
get more benefits) if he would have like to play two more games while he went back into
games with concussions, ask the thousands of people who played any form of pro
football who now suffer from brain damage. The answer would be a resounding no! The
NFL has to make players sit out for at least one game even if these players feel fine. It is
nice to have fame and fortune now but when that player is just only in his early 50’s and
already forgotten that he has brushed his teeth then something must be done to prevent
Works Cited
Online Newspaper
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Alan Schwarz. “N.F.L. Acknowledges Long-Term Concussion Effects.” The New York
Times. The New York Times, 20 Dec. 2009. Web. 28 Nov. 2010.
• Thesis/Support: 4
• Summary/Analysis: 4
• Organization/Development: 4
• Mechanics: 2
• Citations: 2
• Sources: 2
• Instructions: 3
Avg.: 3/B
Comments: For the next paper, do some research into why head trauma is so dangerous
from a medical perspective. Use this information to support your argument.