1

Katie Braman
Professor Quimby
WMGST 121
May 14, 2019
Thinking Outside the Gender Box

Females are artsy, submissive, emotional, and quiet. Males are messy, insensitive,

athletic, aggressive, and loud. These are typical female and male personality traits. Females

cook and clean. Males fix things and take out the garbage. These are typical female and male

domestic behaviors. Females are teachers and nurses. Males are engineers and doctors. These

are typical female and male occupation choices. Females like makeup and fashion. Men are not

into their looks or what they wear. Collectively these are all gender stereotypes, generalizations

about the roles, attributes, or characteristics of each gender. ​Stereotypes are incredibly simplistic

and do not at all describe the attributes of every person of each gender (Brewer, n.d.).

Even though gender stereotypes continue to prevail in American society, people should

work to shift them. There are messages that tell men and women how to behave, what to life or

dislike, and how to look, think, and feel. While some people seem to fit into gender norms and

stereotypes more than others, almost everyone has aspects of themselves that could be

considered outside the stereotypical box for their gender.

As a Resident Assistant in Rand Hall, an upper class residence, I connect with students

all the time. Since I manage a coed floor, I engage in conversations with male and female

students frequently. When I am on duty, I also interact with several residents because I do rounds

throughout the building at least three times per shift. For my Liberating Act assignment, I sought

out residents and asked them to participate in a short dialogue and a couple of exercises relating

to gender stereotypes. The process included having each student review a list of gender
 2

descriptors and classify each trait as female female or male. I showed each student how society

labels each trait by a particular gender. Next, I shared a series of quotes that each focused on

gender. I then asked the following questions:

1. How do you define a gender stereotype?

2. By looking at the male and female traits list and looking at the quotes about gender, do

these things reinforce your ideas about gender?

3. Have they changed your perspective and/or opinions increase your awareness/ on gender

stereotypes? Explain your answer.

4. Did any of these quotes resonate with you/stand out to you? Explain.

St. Olaf students generally enjoy having conversations about contemporary issues, like gender

stereotypes, that are relevant to them and their world. In fact, everyone I asked was more than

willing to help me. By challenging them to think about how gender stereotypes can positively

and negatively affect people, I would like the students to have a greater awareness, a greater

understanding, and a more open mind to respecting and accepting of others for who they are

without putting labels on them.

While some of my conversations were longer than others, I would like to highlight some

of the pieces of process that resonated with me. The first person I talked to was Kevin, a senior

who also serves as the Inclusivity Advocate in Rand Hall. The inclusivity advocates promote and

support campus-wide policy and programming to ensure residents are provided with an

equitable, inclusive and welcoming environment that gives them opportunities to engage in the

community. What stuck out to me from our conversation was the quote that impacted him the

most, “Children must be taught how to think, not what to think”. He shared that his mom has
 3

run a daycare for the last eight years. Before that, she was a mother and homemaker. Kevin

commented that people, including his mom, need to be who they are. He added that even though

his mother nurtures the development of young children, it is not because she is a female, but

because of her personality and interests. This conversation reinforced that while some traits may

fit into gender norms, what is vital to understand is that each person embraces the trait because

he or she wants to, not because society says that is the way he or she should be.

The next person I talked to was Kierra, my nextdoor neighbor who is a senior. She

emphasized that throughout the exercises, it seemed obvious that gender stereotypes can be both

positive and negative. To her, the quotes showed that words and ideas impact how people

perceive others and that traits are important if they are authentic, not if they fit a male or female

category.

Leo, a transgender male senior, found himself circling some of the the worst traits for

masculinity and gave traits he thought were valuable to femininity which he acknowledged “is

sorta messed up”. The exercise made him think about how much he seems to apologize for

nothing, for just existing. He commented that the task was exciting because it reminded him that

he thinks about gender all the time. The quote that resonated with him, “There are many roles

you can play in life, but you know there is one role you must play: to be yourself,” reinforces his

commitment to be authentic regardless of gender stereotypes. I valued his insight and honesty.

Leo stated that masculinity should be allowed to be thought of as nurturing and femininity

should be allowed to be perceived as strong. He added that “gender can be fluid, multiple things

at once. It can be nothing and everything.” Talking to Leo reinforced the notion that people do

not need to accept the limits that society tries to impose by having female and male labels.
 4

In my conversation with with Adam, a gay senior,​ ​I appreciated how he acknowledged

the difficult and complicated nature of the task to indicate whether the words described female or

male traits. Thinking about how these words overlapped in his understanding of his LGBTQ+

identity, Adam shared that he would consider many of these traits to be both male and female.

At this point, I wanted to say, “eureka!” because he seemed to understand the essence and

purpose of my liberating act. The combination of ideas and insight given by both Leo and Adam

was compelling. When people think a certain characteristic is only attributed to a certain gender,

it means they are expecting someone to fit in a binary box with certain expectations like how one

should act, dress, or speak.

Beliefs about gender stereotypes are ingrained in our consciousness and we tend to think

that gender roles are natural and therefore we do not question them. Society and culture bombard

us with gender messages that are categorized as male-like or female-like. It is important to take a

step back and identify these influences. To examine how these messages affect our sense of

self-worth in addition to how we view others is vital to the process of thinking “outside the

gender box” and accepting ourselves and others for who they are . . . regardless of gender.

There is a tendency to think that gender roles are natural and somewhat automatic and as

a result, we do not question them. However, in the conversations with my fellow classmates, I

found this not to be true. The students seemed unwilling to accept society’s identification of

female and male labels and prefered to make their own decisions about gender stereotypes,

identity, and expression. This exercise reinforced the ideas from many of the course materials

and class discussions. For example, Launius and Hassel in ​Threshold Concepts in Women’s and

Gender Studies​ (2018) defined gender stereotypes as “the messages that circulate throughout
 5

society that communicate society’s norms for gender, often in ways that we may only be dimly

aware of it” ​(Launius & Hassel, 2018, p.52). For me, the liberating act assignment increased my

awareness of how college students perceive gender as well as their willingness to challenge

traditional gender stereotypes. The process was a small, but important step in not only starting a

conversation about gender stereotypes, but also increasing understanding and tolerance for

people who do not fit into society’s “gender box”.

References

Brewer, H. (n.d.). List of gender stereotypes. Retrieved from

https://www.healthguidance.org/entry/15910/1/List-of-Gender-Stereotypes.html

Launius, C., & Hassel, H. (2018). ​Threshold Concepts in women's and gender studies: Ways

of seeing, thinking, and knowing.​ (2nd ed.). New York, NY, Routledge Press.