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Joel Ramirez

Michele Tubbs

ENGL-1302-129

04/02/2020

To a Daughter Leaving Home Response essay

I find the poem by Linda Pastan “To a Daughter Leaving Home” has an insightful

meaning behind the life’s journey as a parent. The main idea of the poem comes from the parents

perspective, (who is the narrator), describing a memory of a time teaching their young daughter

how to ride a bike for the first time. Within that memory, the daughter who is uncertain on how

to properly ride a bike, takes upon herself to carlessleys venture away from the narrator. This

leaves the narrator to be heartbroken because the daughter formed some independence and no

longer feels needed. The narrator uses that memory to express a valuable lesson, children grow

up to be independent without in a blink of an eye, and have to accept the reality of having to let

them go and face the world on their own.

What first struck my attention, was the title of the poem. I found the title relatable

because as a father of a baby girl, I would find it challenging to face that my daughter will form

independence, and one day be ready to take on the world alone. Thus, leaving me to feel no

longer needed. In addition, the title played a major part of the story of the poem, because it

combined who the child was, and if the child was a girl or boy. If it wasn’t for the title, it would

have left the impression that the poem would be about a parent describing their experience with

their careless child riding a bicycle, and them having difficulty time to keep up.
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Throughout the poem the narrator never mentions if they are the father or the mother of

the eight year old girl. I find the author intended for the readers to imagine a time in their

childhood, and who taught them how to ride a bicycle. Thus, leaving them to create an emotional

reaction towards the poem.

In the first stanza, I find it sets up the scene of the poem. It mentions the daughters “eight

to ride a / bicycle”(2-3), and at eight years of age, I find they barely understand the concept of

following directions. Also, at that age everything is new and exciting because they never

experience the repetition of life, and the boredom it brings. So it leaves me to assume that the

child will be thrilled to be taught how to ride a bicycle, because this is unknown to her, and for

that, it’s outside of what she would call a normal day. In addition, when it comes to riding a

bicycle it requires to matatine a certain balance inorder to avoid falling off, and how to steer the

front wheel so that a turn will not cause the bike to completely stop and cause them to fly off.

The narrator mentions “loping along / beside you”(line 3-4), allows me to indicate the narrator's

love and cares for the daughter. Specifically, if they’re trying to keep an easy strid within the

boundaries of the child. They must have a strong relationship if the narrator assumes the child

will completely follow her directions.

In the second stanza, the narrator is further empzinging the daughter's experience riding a

bicycle. As the narrator states, “as you wobbled away / on two round wheels”(line 5-6), leaves

me to assume that the daughter is having trouble keeping balance and has no training wheels.

This further gives me the impression that the daughter has never ridden a bicycle, or bicycle

without training wheels. In addition, it expresses how the narrator is concerned, and expects for

the daughter to fall off the bicycle when it states “surprise when you pulled/ down the
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curved”(lines 9-8). At this point, the daughter has passed the narrator and leaving them to feel

defenseless from the obstacles the daughter is facing. It also indicates that the daughter is

careless and has formed independence because she is now on her own without the guidance and

the protection of the narrator.

In the third stanza, the narrator focuses on the idea of the daughters falling off the bicycle

and getting hurt so they can further emphasize the meaning of the poem.“ I kept waiting / for the

thud”(lines 11-12), I find the narrator is feeling a great deal of emotion, such as fear and anxiety.

It appears that the narrator is anticipating for the worse to happen, and further exsaturating the

narrator's position. This leaves the impression that the narrator is left hopelessly to watch the

daughters face a situation that will cause her pain and suffering. At this very moment within the

poem, all I can feel is the heartache, because as parents, there is no other love you have for a

child and the lengths you’ll go through to protect them from anytype of suffering that comes

their way. I also notice that the daughter must be beyond the distance of the narrator's ability to

protect her from falling when they state, “sprinted to catch up”(line 14). The daughter must be

accelerating at a great speed, if a fully grown adult with long strides is unable to keep up. I can

also infer that the daughter is very energetic, as any curious eight year old would be. As well,

expressing that she has been taken by the thrill of the moment, and has proven to overcome the

narrator's expectations of how far she has gone without the guidance of her protector.

In the fourth stanza, the narrator has lost the emotion of fear and anxiety, to having to

deal with acceptance of letting the child go experience her own adventure. As the narrator states

“while you grew / smaller, more breakable”(line 15-16), it’s apparent the narrator at this point

has come to the terms that they can not control every decision the daughter makes because she is
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beyond great distance. The narrator is now forced to only watch the daughter journey through the

park alone, and could only hope she doesn't fall. We all hope that our children make the right

decisions when they are given the opportunity of falling, I mean isn’t that the point of being a

parent anyway? To prepare our children to stand on their own two feet or in this case wheels. It’s

hard to face our own mortality. What we teach our children and how we prepare them is what we

send out into the world. Versions of ourselves that slowly merge with the person our kids are

meant to be. Furthermore, the naratto is expressing how she compares the daughter to be small

and fragile, leaving me with the impression that they are getting prepared for them not to feel

needed. The daughter on the other hand, seems confident and stable and enjoying the adventure

when it states, “ pumping, pumping / for your life”(line 18-19). This gives me the confirmation

that the daughter now on her own and pushing the boundaries of her limitations. She is now no

longer having to feel the need to ride a bicycle, she is completely submerged in the excitement of

riding the bicycle that has taken the fear of failure to be out her forfornt. Others may view it as

an eight year old riding a bicycle, but it is more complex than it seems. She merely grasps the

concept of life, understanding that life is adventure even there is a chance of falling off and

getting hurt.

In the fifth stanza, The narrator has eliminated the effort to keep up with the daughter

when it states “ handkerchief waving / goodbye”(line 24-25). By having the narrator imagine the

handkerchief be the form of a goodbye, gives me the final confirmation that the narrator has

accepted the fate of having to let the daughter experience life's journey on her own. The narrator

must be a great deal of emotions because they are disconnected from each other.
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Works Cited
Mays, Kelly J., editor. The Norton Introduction to Literature. Shorter 12th ed., W. W. Norton &
Company, 2017.