WARD REFLECTION PAPER

I remember all the emotions I felt prior to entering Cardiology fellowship; anxiousness, fear, excitement,
and everything in between. Aside from being a former resident, most of those feelings stemmed from
what would be a real life experience as a fellow during our clinical rotations.

On my first day of my fellowship, I remember feeling so excited and prepared for what was to come; little
did I know how wrong I would be. I did not know exactly what I expected but I definitely thought at least
some things would be easy. I expected talking to patients easily to extract thorough history and do
physical examination. But then I had to practice speaking and understanding Chinese language in order
for me to have a good diagnosis and management. In that case I should have my time management skills
under control. It became difficult to time everything correctly so that I could perform other errands and
making sure that all patients should be attended. I had to make sure that before I started the day, I made
a game-plan of how I was going to approach the day to make sure I completed everything in addition to
going rounds with consultants.

It is also not easy to compare yourself to other co-fellows during my fellowship. Even though I tried not to,
I found myself comparing my knowledge and skill ability to others. I found myself thinking “I don’t know as
much they do” or hearing about others performing these intense skills while I had still only performed the
basics, which caused me to feel like I was behind. Even though I still experience these feelings, I remind
myself that these skills come with time and experience. To make it a little easier for me, we have many
consultants who always reminded us of that and always pushed us to reach out of our comfort zone and
perform new tasks even if we were nervous. I still struggle with all of the things I have mentioned, but I
know that I have learned so much and feel so much better as I step into this fellowship.

Reda A. So, M.D.

Cardiology Fellow