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[Title] Small Habits, Big Chains Commented [1]: I love your title!

I think it's catchy, and


it fits perfectly.
[Kicker] Satan’s desire to see us bound starts with his “flaxen cord” of small habits. As
we acknowledge these habits, we know where to start.

[Highlights of the source article]


As IOn a recently reread of The Great Divorce by C. S. Lewis, a particular Formatted: Font: Italic
character stuck out to me—a man held back by the whisperings of a small red lizard on Commented [2]: Maybe do something like this? This
his shoulder. I’ve come to recognize that creature as habits that hold us back. Oftentimes sentence had "make" and "making" very close to each
we are discouraged by small mistakes we make here or there, and then we don’t know other and it felt a little off. I also think it's stronger
because it's turning "improvements" into a verb. But if
where to start making improvements in improving our lives. As we set new goals for the you prefer it the way it was, we can definitely change it
coming year, I think the best place to put place our focus is not on the little mistakes but back.
on the little habits that drag us down. Commented [3]: The use of "influence" here kind of
In his BYU address “Flaxen Threads: The Power of Our Habits,” Carlos E. Asay confused me since it's modifying "the power." Is Satan
addresses the power Satan can wieldinfluence in our lives if we allow certain habits to influencing "the power" or is he influencing our lives?
Instead, maybe we could do something like "wield," or
rule our actionsinto our lives in his BYU address Flaxen Threads: The Power of Our maybe another word that you like better?
Habits. He starts with a well-known object lesson from Sunday school object lesson: the
Commented [4]: There were two "in our lives" in this
teacher asks a student to break a single string that ties their wrists together and does so sentence, so maybe we could do something like this?
easily, but when that string is wrapped over and over again around their wrist, they Or if you prefer, we could change the first one to
become unable to break free. While his Like Asay’s title, this object lesson references the something like "over us" so that it will read, "...Carlos E.
Asay addresses the power Satan can wield over us if
desires of Satan to lead by a “flaxen cord, until he bindeth them with his strong cords we allow certain habits into our lives."
forever” (2 Nephi 26:22), but Asayhe goes on to provide a more positive note.
Commented [5]: I moved this to get rid of a noun
While Satan can drag us down one small habit at a time, we can be uplifted one stack, and I think this version helps makes the
small habit at a time as well. Brother Asay provides 6 steps for this: sentence clearer. Ok?
1. Define your desired habit Commented [6]: I feel like there are some ambiguous
2. Bind yourself to action pronoun references here. It's not really clear whose
3. Put the new conduct into operation wrists the string is around. Maybe we could do
something like, "the teacher ties a student's wrists
4. Bolster your will together with a single string asks the student to break
5. Do not look back the thread. The student does so easily, but when that
6. Plunge in whole-heartedly string is wrapped around their wrists over and over
again, they become unable to break free."

Read more in his speech Flaxen Threads: The Power of Our Habits to see how the power Commented [7]: This sentence felt a little
disconnected from the sentence above. Maybe we
of repentance encourages us to change bad habits and build new ones. could connect it to the object lesson by doing
something like this?
Source: BYU Speeches
I also removed "while" here and added "but" before the
next clause because the very next sentence also
begins with "while." And I added Asay because there
FEATURE IMAGE BY (the Design Team will add the name of the photographer were a lot of references to other people right above
(the teacher, the student, Satan), which made the "his"
here, also in all caps) and "he" a little unclear. Ok?
Commented [8]: I love how you sum up the article in
Find more insights six steps like this. It makes it a very quick and insightful
read.
Learn more about freeing yourself from bad habits in Marvin J. Ashton’s general Commented [9]: "This" is a little ambiguous. Maybe
conference address Shake Off the Chains with Which Ye Are Bound say something like "building uplifting habits"?
Commented [10]: Should we say "Carlos E. Asay"
instead of "his"?
For more ideas on breaking habits, check out the New Era article Idea List: Breaking Bad
Habits

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