GOAL:To break your mental loops and feel less stuck.

The reason it doesn’t work is because it doesn’t help us move past the issue or the negative feeling.

WHY??? WHY???

Worry is about the future. We typically worry about the future because we are afraid that something
bad is going to happen,

1. Manage stress. Stress can contribute to anxious, worrisome thoughts and

emotions. What are 2 or 3 things you do to help yourself feel better? This can be
simple things like take a walk, listen to music, or watch a movie. If these things
help, then do more of them!
2. Avoid harmful or negative people. You absolutely do not have to hang out
with people who negatively affect you. Be aware of your emotional weather. If, in
general, it is warm and sunny in your world and whenever a particular person
shows up it gets stormy, then simply minimize contact with that person.
3. Remember that rumination and worry DO NOT work. Don’t pretend that
thinking about the past or worrying about the future works. As indicated in
Lesson 1, it is just like the hamster on the wheel. It feels productive, but it isn’t. It
is harmful.
4. Problem solve rather than worry. If you are worried about a particular issue,
then spell that issue out and try to problem solve it. Don’t try to avoid the pain or
the negative emotion, but simply work toward solving the actual problem. You
can do this by changing “what if” worries into “how can I?” worries. For example,
if you are thinking “What if this person ignores me?” then you can transform this
into, “How can I respond to this person if they ignore me?”
5. Focus on what you have control over. There are 3 buckets of things in life:
o Things we can’t control
o Things we have some control over
o Things we have complete control over

Please don’t hold yourself accountable or judge yourself for things that you only
have some control over or cannot control. Be kind to yourself and recognize that
worrying and/or harshly judging yourself on these things is unfair and wrong.
There are issues you can control and issues you cannot control. Reflect on the
Serenity Prayer shown here.

6. Sleep! Practice good sleep hygiene. If you start worrying, then get out of bed
and try to re-set your brain. Do what you would normally do before falling
asleep. Watch a movie or read a book for 30 minutes to reset the going to sleep
process.
7. Spend more time in the present. Consider this question: Where are you
living? By living in the past or future, as indicated by ruminating about past
events or worrying about what is yet to come, you are missing out on living in
the present. Practice being present with yourself and your surroundings by
paying attention to what you are doing at any given moment (e.g., eating a meal,
cleaning your home, sitting at your desk at work, reading a book, driving, or
watching a TV show). Then get in touch with your senses. Notice what you see,
smell, touch, hear, and taste. This process of being in the present moment is
referred to as mindfulness.

8. Carve out time to worry. Identify a time each day that you

can allot to worrying. When you find yourself worrying, write down the worry in a
couple of words and remind yourself that you will think about it at your
designated worry time. Chances are, you will no longer feel as worried about the
issue when your worry time arrives.
9. Become accepting of uncertainty. Uncertainty often causes anxiety due to
fearing the unknown. In order to become more accepting of uncertainty, ask
yourself these questions:
o Can you be certain about everything in life?
o How is needing certainty in life helpful and unhelpful?
o Is it reasonable to predict that bad things will happen as a result of
uncertainty?
 o How likely are positive or neutral outcomes to occur following
uncertainty?
o Is it possible to live with the small chance that something bad may
happen?
10. Use your emotions for your benefit. Emotions, although problematic at times,
are a natural part of the human experience and can be used to benefit us if we’ll
let them. Being able to do this effectively is based in knowing how to perceive
your negative emotions. Simply viewing negative emotions as a sign that
whatever is causing them needs attention results in the ability to make informed
decisions.