7 Stages of Grief

7 Stages of Grief
 
Shock Stage: Initial paralysis at hearing the bad news.
You will be in disbelief and literal shock. May appear as if there is no reaction at all and
might have to be told a few times. This may be followed by more external shock, where
physical reactions may occur such as shortness of breath and possible paling of skin.

Denial stage: Avoiding the inevitable.

Not accepting what has happened and to whom once the initial shock has worn off.
Pretending that the news has not happened. They can potentially close their eyes and
pretend nothing has happened. They will typically go on with their life and work as
though all is well.
 
Anger stage: Frustrated outpouring of bottled-up emotion.
After denial comes a sudden surge of anger, where the bottle up emotions are ex pulsed
in a huge outpouring of grief. Blaming whoever is in the way. The phrase 'Why me?' may
be repeated in an endlessly in their heads. A part of this anger is 'Why not you?', which
feeds their anger at the those who are not affected.
 
Bargaining stage: Seeking in vain for a way out.
Once the anger subsides, the bargaining stage begins. Seeking ways to avoid having this
whole thing happen. Bargaining is a expression of hope that you can reverse the bad
news.
 
Depression stage: Final realization of the inevitable.
After denial, anger and bargaining, the inevitability of the news eventually (and not
before you are ready) becomes a reality. From the animation of anger and bargaining,
they fall into a deep dark whole with no light at the end of the tunnel. In this deep
depression, they see only horrible things with no ending. In turning in towards
themselves, they turn away from any solution and any help that others can give them.
 
Testing stage: Seeking realistic solutions.
Even in the darkest hours of depression, reality starts to take over and the person realizes
that they stay in that deep state forever. These may be taken on as 'experiments' to see if
doing these things help the situation in any way. As this activity starts to work, at least in
some ways, it is found to be preferred to the depression and so the person crawls out of
that dark hole.
 
Acceptance stage: Finally finding the way forward.
Embracing stability is the final stage, where the person is ready and actively involved in
moving on to the next phase of their lives, no matter how short. The terminally ill person
will be putting their life in order, sorting out wills and helping others to accept the
inevitability that then now have countenanced and faced.
 
Just remember to be easy on yourself. Take deep breaths and take it one hour at a time.