12.

Complications

Bella and I walked silently to biology.

I was trying to focus myself on the moment, on the girl beside me, on what was real and
solid, on anything that would keep Alice's deceitful, meaningless visions out of my Head.

We passed Angela Weber, lingering on the sidewalk, discussing an assignment with a boy
from her Trigonometry class.
I scanned her thoughts perfunctorily, expecting more disappointment, only to be surprised
by their wistful tenor.

Ah, so there was something Angela wanted. Unfortunately, it wasn't something that could
be easily gift wrapped.

I felt strangely comforted for a moment, hearing Angela's hopeless yearning.

A sense of kinship that Angela would never know about passed through me, and I was, in
that second, at one with the kind human girl.

It was oddly consoling to know that I wasn't the only one living out a tragic love story.
Heartbreak was- everywhere.
In the next second, I was abruptly and thoroughly irritated.

Because Angela's story, didn't have to be tragic.

She was human and he was human and the difference that seemed so insurmountable in
her head was ridiculous, truly ridiculous compared to my own situation.

There was no point in her broken heart.

What a wasteful sadness, when there was no valid reason for her not to be with the one she
wanted. Why shouldn't she have what she wanted?

Why shouldn't this one story have a happy ending?

I wanted to give her a gift... Well, I would give her what she wanted. Knowing what I did of
human nature, it probably wouldn't even be very difficult.

I sifted through the consciousness of the boy beside her, the object of her affections, and
he did not seem unwilling, he was just stymied by the same difficulty she was.

Hopeless and resigned, the way she was.

All I would have to do was plant the suggestion...

 The plan formed easily, the script wrote itself without effort on my part.

I would need Emmett's help getting him to go along with this was the only real difficulty.

Human nature was so much easier to manipulate than vampire nature. I was pleased with
my solution,

With my gift for Angela. It was a nice diversion from my own problems. Would that mine
were as easily fixed.

My mood was slightly improved as Bella and I took our seats.

Maybe I should be more positive.

Maybe there was some solution out there for us that were escaping me, the way Angela's
obvious solution was so invisible to her.

Not likely... But why waste time with hopelessness? I didn't have time to waste when it
came to Bella. Each second mattered.

Mr. Banner entered pulling an ancient TV and VCR. He was skipping through a section he
wasn't particularly interested in-genetic disorders-by showing a movie for the next three
days.

Lorenzo's Oilwas not a very cheerful piece, but that didn't stop the excitement in the room.

No notes, no test-able material. Three free days. The humans exulted.

It didn't matter to me, either way. I hadn't been planning on paying any attention to
anything but Bella.

I did not pull my chair away from hers today, to give myself space to breathe.

Instead, I sat close beside her like any normal human would. Closer than we sat inside my
car, close enough that the left side of my body felt submerged in the heat from her skin.

It was a strange experience, both enjoyable and nerve-racking, but I preferred this to sitting
across the table from her. It was more than I was used to, and yet I quickly realized that it
was not enough.

I was not satisfied. Being this close to her only made me want to be closer still. The pull was
stronger the closer I got.

I had accused her of being a magnet for danger. Right now, it felt like that was the literal
truth. I was danger, and, with every inch I allowed myself nearer to her, her attraction grew
in force.

And then Mr. Banner turned the lights out.

It was odd how much of a difference this made, considering that the lack of light meant little
to my eyes.

I could still see just as perfectly as before. Every detail of the room was clear.

So why the sudden shock of electricity in the air, in this dark that was not dark to me? Was it
because I knew that I was the only one who could see clearly? That both Bella and I were
invisible to the others?

Like we were alone, just the two of us, hidden in the dark room, sitting so close beside one
another...

My hand moved toward her without my permission. Just to touch her hand, to hold it in the
darkness.

Would that be such a horrific mistake? If my skin bothered her, she only had to pull away...

I yanked my hand back, folded my arms tightly across my chest and clenched my hands
closed.

No mistakes. I'd promised myself that I would make no mistakes, no matter how minimal
they seemed. If I held her hand, I would only want more-another insignificant touch,
another move closer to her.

I could feel that. A new kind of desire was growing in me, working to override my self-
control.

No mistakes.

Bella folded her arms securely across her own chest, and her hands balled up into fists, just
like mine.

What are you thinking? I was dying to whisper the words to her, but the room was too quiet
to get away with even a whispered conversation.

The movie began, lightening the darkness just a bit. Bella glanced up at me. She noted the
rigid way I held my body-just like hers-and smiled. Her lips parted slightly, and her eyes
seemed full of warm invitations.

Or perhaps I was seeing what I wanted to see.

I smiled back; her breathing caught with a low gasp and she looked quickly away.

That made it worse. I didn't know her thoughts, but I was suddenly positive that I had been
right before, and that she wanted me to touch her. She felt this dangerous desire just as I
did.

Between her body and mine, the electricity hummed.

 She didn't move all through the hour, holding her stiff, controlled pose as I held mine.
Occasionally she would peek at me again, and the humming current would jolt through me
with a sudden shock. The hour passed-slowly, and yet not slowly enough. This was so new, I
could have sat like this with her for days, just to experience the feeling fully.

I had a dozen different arguments with myself while the minutes passed, rationality
struggling with desire as I tried to justify touching her.

Finally, Mr. Banner turned the lights on again.

In the bright fluorescent light, the atmosphere of the room returned to normal. Bella sighed
and stretched, flexing her fingers in front of her.

It must have been uncomfortable for her to hold that position for so long. It was easier for
me-stillness came naturally.

I chuckled at the relieved expression on her face. "Well, that was interesting."

"Umm," she murmured, clearly understanding what I referred to, but making no comment.
What I wouldn't give to hear what she was thinking right now.

I sighed. No amount of wishing was going to help with that. "Shall we?" I asked, standing.

She made a face and got unsteadily to her feet, her hands splayed out as if she were afraid
she was going to fall.

I could offer her my hand. Or I could place that hand underneath her elbow-just lightly-and
steady her.

Surely that wouldn't be such a horrible infraction...

No mistakes.

She was very quiet as we walked toward the gym. The crease was in evidence between her
eyes, a sign that she was deep in thought. I, too, was thinking deeply.

One touch of her skin wouldn't hurt her, my selfish side contended.

I could easily moderate the pressure of my hand. It wasn't exactly difficult, as long as I was
firmly in control of myself.

My tactile sense was better developed than a human's; I could juggle a dozen crystal goblets
without breaking any of them; I could stroke a soap bubble without popping it. As long as I
was firmly in control...

Bella was like a soap bubble-fragile and ephemeral. Temporary.

 How long would I be able to justify my presence in her life? How much time did I have?
Would I have another chance like this chance, like this moment, like this second?

She would not always be within my arm's reach...

Bella turned to face me at the gym's door, and her eyes widened at the expression on my
face.

She didn't speak. I looked at myself in the reflection of her eyes and saw the conflict raging
in my own. I watched my face change as my better side lost the argument.

My hand lifted without a conscious command for it to do so. As gently as if she were made
of the thinnest glass, as if she were fragile as a bubble, my fingers stroked the warm skin
that covered her cheekbone.

It heated under my touch, and I could feel the pulse of blood speed beneath her transparent
skin.

Enough, I ordered, though my hand was aching to shape itself to the side of her face.
Enough.

It was difficult to pull my hand back, to stop myself from moving closer to her than I already
was.

A thousand different possibilities ran through my mind in an instant-a thousand different

ways to touch her.

The tip of my finger tracing the shape of her lips. My palm cupping under her chin. Pulling
the clip from her hair and letting it spill out across my hand. My arms winding around her
waist, holding her against the length of my body.

Enough.

I forced myself to turn, to move away from her. My body moved stiffly-unwilling. I let my
mind linger behind to watch her as I walked swiftly away, almost running from the
temptation. I caught Mike Newton's thoughts-they were the loudest-while he watched Bella
walk past him in oblivion, her eyes unfocused and her cheeks red.

He glowered and suddenly my name was mingled with curses in his head;

I couldn't help grinning slightly in response.

My hand was tingling. I flexed it and then curled it into a fist, but it continued to sting
painlessly.

No, I hadn't hurt her-but touching her had still been a mistake.

It felt like fire-like the thirsting burn of my throat had spread throughout my entire body.
 The next time I was close to her, would I be able to stop myself from touching her again?
And if I touched her once, would I be able to stop at that?

No more mistakes.

That was it. Savor the memory, Edward, I told myself grimly, and keep your hands to
yourself.

That or I would have to force myself to leave...somehow. Because I couldn't allow myself
near her if I insisted on making errors.

I took a deep breath and tried to steady my thoughts.

Emmett caught up to me outside the English building.

"Hey, Edward." He's looking better. Weird, but better. Happy.

"Hey, Em." Did I look happy? I supposed, despite the chaos in my head, I felt that way.

Way to keep your mouth shut, kid. Rosalie wants to rip your tongue out.

I sighed. "Sorry I left you to deal with that. Are you angry with me?"

"Naw. Rose'll get over it. It was bound to happen anyway." With what Alice sees coming...

Alice's visions were not what I wanted to think about right now. I stared forward, my teeth
locking together.

As I searched for a distraction, I caught sight of Ben Cheney entering the Spanish room
ahead of us.

Ah here was my chance to give Angela Weber her gift.

I stopped walking and caught Emmett's arm. "Hold on a second."

“What's up?”

"I know I don't deserve it, but would you do me a favour anyway?"

"What is it?" he asked, curious.

Under my breath-and at a speed that would have made the words incomprehensible to a
human no matter how loud they'd been spoken-I explained to him what I wanted.

He stared at me blankly when I was done, his thoughts as blank as his face.

"So?" I prompted. "Will you help me do it?"

It took him a minute to respond. "But, why?"

"C'mon, Emmett. Why not?"

Who are you and what have you done with my brother?

"Aren't you the one who complains that school is always the same? This is something a little
different, isn't it? Consider it an experiment-an experiment in human nature."

He stared at me for another moment before he caved.

"Well, it is different; I'll give you that... Okay, fine." Emmett snorted and then shrugged. "I'll
help you."

I grinned at him, feeling more enthusiastic about my plan now that he was on board. Rosalie
was a pain, but I would always owe her one for choosing Emmett; no one had a better
brother than mine.

Emmett didn't need to practice. I whispered his lines to him once under my breath as we
walked into the classroom.

Ben was already in his seat behind mine, assembling his homework to hand in. Emmett and I
both sat and did the same thing. The classroom was not quiet yet; the murmur of subdued
conversation would continue until Mrs. Goff called for attention.

She was in no hurry, appraising the quizzes from the last class.

"So," Emmett said his voice louder than necessary-if he were really speaking only to me.

"Did you ask Angela Weber out yet?"

The sound of papers rustling behind me came to an abrupt stop as Ben froze, his attention
suddenly riveted on our conversation.

Angela? They're talking about Angela?

Good. I had his interest.

"No," I said, shaking my head slowly to appear regretful.

"Why not?" Emmett improvised. "Are you chicken?"

I grimaced at him.

"No. I heard that she was interested in someone else."

Edward Cullen was going to ask Angela out? But ... No. I don't like that. I don't want him
near her.
He's...not right for her. Not...safe.
 I hadn't anticipated the chivalry, the protective instinct. I'd been working for jealousy. But
whatever worked.

"You're going to let that stop you?" Emmett asked scornfully, improvising again.
"Not up for the competition?"

I glared at him, but made used of what he gave me.

"Look, I guess she really likes this Ben person. I'm not going to try to convince her otherwise.
There are other girls."
The reaction in the chair behind me was electric.

"Who?" Emmett asked, back to the script.

"My lab partner said it was some kid named Cheney. I'm not sure I know who he is."

I bit back my smile. Only the haughty Cullen’s could get away with pretending not to know
every student at this tiny school.

Ben's head was whirling with shock. Me? Over. Edward Cullen? But why would she like me?
"Edward," Emmett muttered in a lower tone, rolling his eyes toward the boy.
"He's right behind you," he mouthed, so obviously that the human could easily read the
words.
"Oh," I muttered back.

I turned in my seat and glanced once at the boy behind me. For a second, the black eyes
behind the glasses were frightened, but then he stiffened and squared his narrow shoulders,
affronted by my clearly disparaging evaluation. His chin shot out and an angry flush
darkened his golden-brown skin.

"Huh," I said arrogantly as I turned back to Emmett.

He thinks he's better than me. But Angela doesn't. I'll show him...Perfect.

"Didn't you say she was taking Yorkie to the dance, though?"
Emmett asked, snorting as he said the name of the boy that many scorned for his
awkwardness.

"That was a group decision apparently." I wanted to be sure that Ben was clear on this.
"Angela's shy. If -well, if a guy doesn't have the nerve to ask her out, she'd never ask him."
"You like shy girls," Emmett said, back to improvisation. Quiet girls. Girls like...hmm, I don't
know.
“Maybe Bella Swan?”
I grinned at him.

"Exactly." Then I returned to the performance. "Maybe Angela will get tired of waiting.
Maybe I'll ask her to the prom."
No, you won't, Ben thought, straightening up in his chair. So what if she's so much taller than
me? If she doesn't care, then neither do I.
She's the nicest, smartest, prettiest girl in this school... and she want me.

I liked this Ben. He seemed bright and well-meaning. Maybe even worthy of a girl like
Angela.

I gave Emmett thumbs up under the desk as Mrs. Goff stood and greeted the class.

Okay, I'll admit it-that was sort of fun, Emmett thought.

I smiled to myself, pleased that I'd been able to shape one love story's happy ending. I was
positive that

Ben would follow through, and Angela would receive my anonymous gift. My debt was
repaid.

How silly humans were, to let a six inch height differential confound their happiness.
My success put me in a good mood. I smiled again as I settled into my chair and prepared to
be entertained.
After all, as Bella had pointed out at lunch, I'd never seen her in action in her gym class
before.
Mike's thoughts were the easiest to pinpoint in the babble of voices that swarmed through
the gym.
His mind had gotten far too familiar over the last few weeks.

With a sigh, I resigned myself to listening through him. At least I could be sure that he would
be paying attention to Bella.

I was just in time to hear him offer to be her badminton partner; as he made the suggestion;
other partnerings ran through his mind. My smile faded, my teeth clenched together, and I
had to remind myself that murdering Mike Newton was not a permissible option.

"Thanks, Mike-you don't have to do this, you know."

"Don't worry; I'll keep out of your way."

They grinned at each other, and flashes of numerous accidents-always in some way
connected to Bella flashed through Mike's head.

Mike played alone at first, while Bella hesitated on the back half of the court, holding her
racket gingerly, as if it was some kind of weapon.

Then Coach Clapp ambled by and ordered Mike to let Bella play.
Uh oh, Mike thought as Bella moved forward with a sigh, holding her racquet at an awkward
angle.

Jennifer Ford served the birdie directly toward Bella with a smug twist to her thoughts.

Mike saw Bella lurch toward it, swinging the racket yards wide of her target, and he rushed
in to try to save the volley.

I watched the trajectory of Bella's racquet with alarm. Sure enough, it hit the taut net and
sprung back at her, clipping her forehead before it spun out to strike Mike's arm with a
resounding thwack.

Ow. Ow. Ungh. That's going to leave a bruise.

Bella was kneading her forehead. It was hard to stay in my seat where I belonged, knowing
she was hurt.

But what could I do, if I were there? And it didn't seem to be serious... I hesitated, watching.
If she intended to continue to try to play, I was going to have to manufacture an excuse to
pull her out of class.

The coach laughed. "Sorry, Newton." That girl's the worst jinx I've ever seen. Shouldn't inflict
her on the others...

He turned his back deliberately and moved to watch another game so that Bella could
return to her former spectator's role.

Ow, Mike thought again, massaging his arm. He turned to Bella. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, are you?" she asked sheepishly, blushing.

"I think I'll make it." Don't want to sound like a cry baby. But, man, that hurts!
Mike swung his arm in a circle, wincing.

"I'll just stay back here," Bella said embarrassment and chagrin on her face rather than pain.

Mike had got the worst of it. I certainly hoped that was the case. At least she wasn't playing
anymore.

She held her racquet so carefully behind her back, her eyes wide with remorse... I had to
disguise my laugh as coughing.

What's funny? Emmett wanted to know.

"Tell you later," I muttered.

Bella didn't venture into the game again. The coach ignored her and let Mike play alone.
I breezed through the quiz at the end of the hour, and Mrs. Goff let me go early.

I was listening intently to Mike as I walked across the campus. He'd decided to confront
Bella about me.
Jessica swears they're dating. Why? Why did he have to pick her?

He didn't recognize the real phenomenon-which she'd picked me.

"So"

"So what?" she wondered.

"You and Cullen, huh?" You and the freak. I guess if a rich guy is that important to you... I
gritted my teeth at his degrading assumption.

"That's none of your business, Mike."

Defensive. So it's true. Crap. "I don't like it."

"You don't have to," she snapped.

Why can't she see what a circus sideshow he is? Like they all are. The way he stares at her. It
gives me chills to watch.
"He looks at you like...like you're something to eat."

I cringed, waiting for her response.

Her face turned bright red, and her lips pressed together like she was holding her breath.

Then, suddenly, a giggle burst through her lips.

Now she's laughing at me. Great.

Mike turned, thoughts sullen, and wandered off to change.

I leaned against the gym wall and tried to compose myself. How could she have laughed at
Mike's accusation-so entirely on target that I began to worry that Forks was becoming too
aware ... Why would she laugh at the suggestion that I could kill her, when she knew that it
was entirely true? Where was the humor in that?

What was wrong with her?

Did she have morbid sense of humor? That didn't fit with my idea of her character, but how
could I be sure? Or maybe my daydream of the giddy angel was true in the one respect, in
that she had no sense of fear at all.

Brave-that was one word for it.

 Others might say stupid, but I knew how bright she was. No matter what the reason,
though, this lack of fear or twisted sense of humor wasn't good for her. Was it this strange
lack that put her in danger so constantly? Maybe she would always need me here...

Just like that, my mood was soaring.

If I could just discipline myself, make myself safe, and then perhaps it would be right for me
to stay with her.

When she walked through the gym doors, her shoulders were stiff and her lower lip was
between her teeth again-a sign of anxiety.

But as soon as her eyes met mine, her rigid shoulders relaxed and a wide smile spread
across her face. It was an oddly peaceful expression. She walked right to my side without
hesitation, only stopping when she was so close that her body heat crashed over me like a
tidal wave.
"Hi," she whispered.
The happiness I felt in this moment was, again, without precedent. "Hello," I said, and then-
because with my mood suddenly so light I couldn't resist teasing her-I added,

"How was gym?"

Her smile wavered. "Fine."

She was a poor liar.

"Really?" I asked, about to press the issue-I was still concerned about her head; was she in
pain?-but then Mike Newton's thoughts we so loud they broke my concentration.

I hate him. I wish he would die. I hope he drives that shiny car right off a cliff. Why couldn't
he just leave her alone? Stick to his own kind-to the freaks.
"What?" Bella demanded.

My eyes refocused on her face. She looked at Mike's retreating back, and then at me again.

"Newton's getting on my nerves," I admitted.

Her mouth fell open, and her smile disappeared. She must have forgotten that I'd had the
power to watch through her calamitous last hour, or hoped that I hadn't utilized it.
"You weren't listening again?"
"How's your head?"

"You're unbelievable!" she said through her teeth, and then she turned away from me and
stalked furiously toward the parking lot. Her skin flushed dark red-she was embarrassed.
I kept pace with her, hoping that her anger would pass soon. She was usually quick to
forgive me.
 "You were the one who mentioned how I'd never seen you in Gym," I explained. "It made
me curious."

She didn't answer; her eyebrows pulled together.

She came to a sudden halt in the parking lot when she realized that the way to my car was
blocked by a crowd of male students.

I wonder how fast they've gone in this thing...

Look at the SMG shift paddles. I've never seen those outside of a magazine...
Nice side grills...

Sure wish I had sixty thousand dollars laying around...

This was exactly why it was better for Rosalie to only use her car out of town.

I wound through the throng of lustful boys to my car; after a second of hesitation, Bella
followed suit.

"Ostentatious," I muttered as she climbed in.

"What kind of car is that?" she wondered.

"An M3."

She frowned. "I don't speak Car and Driver."

"It's a BMW." I rolled my eyes and then focused on backing out without running anyone
down. I had to lock eyes with a few boys that didn't seem willing to move out of my way.

A half-second meeting my gaze seemed to be enough to convince them.

"Are you still angry?" I asked her. Her frown had relaxed.
"Definitely," she answered curtly.

I sighed. Maybe I shouldn't have brought it up. Oh well. I could try to make amends, I
supposed. "Will you forgive me if I apologize?"

She thought about that for a moment. "Maybe...if you mean it," she decided. "And if you
promise not to do it again."

I wasn't going to lie to her, and there was no way I was agreeing to that.

Perhaps if I offered her a different exchange. "How about if I mean it, and I agree to let you
drive this Saturday?" I cringed internally at the thought.

The furrow popped into existence between her eyes as she considered the new bargain.
 "Deal," she said after a moment of thought. Now for my apology... I'd never tried to dazzle
Bella on purpose before, but now seemed like a good time. I stared deep into her eyes as I
drove away from the school, wondering if I was doing it right. I used my most persuasive
tone.
"Then I'm very sorry I upset you."

Her heartbeat thudded louder than before, and the rhythm was abruptly staccato.

Her eyes widened, looking a little stunned. I half-smiled. It seemed like I'd gotten it right. Of
course, I was having a bit of difficulty looking away from her eyes, too.
Equally dazzled. It was a good thing I had this road memorized.

"And I'll be on your doorstep bright and early Saturday morning," I added, finishing the
agreement.

She blinked swiftly, shaking her head as if to clear it.

"Um," she said, "it doesn't help with the Charlie situation if an unexplained Volvo is left in
the driveway."
Ah, how little she still knew me. "I wasn't intending to bring a car."
"How-" she started to ask.

I interrupted her. The answer would be hard to explain without a demonstration, and now
was hardly the time. "Don't worry about it. I'll be there, no car."

She put her head on one side, and looked for a second like she was going to press for more,
but then she seemed to change her mind.

"Is it later yet?" she asked, reminding me of our unfinished conversation in the cafeteria
today; she'd let go of one difficult question just to return another that was more
unappealing.

"I suppose it is later," I agreed unwillingly.

I parked in front of her house, tensing as I tried to think of how to explain...without making
my monstrous nature too evident, without frightening her again. Or was that wrong?
To minimalize my darkness?

She waited with the same politely interested mask she'd worn at lunch. If I'd been less
anxious, her preposterous calm would have made me laugh.

"And you still want to know why you can't see me hunt?" I asked.
"Well, mostly I was wondering about your reaction," she said.

"Did I frighten you?" I asked, positive that she would deny it.
"No."
I tried not to smile, and failed. "I apologize for scaring you." And then my smile vanished
with the momentary humor.
 "It was just the very thought of you being there...while we hunted."

"That would be bad?"

The mental picture was too much-Bella, so vulnerable in the empty darkness; myself, out of
control... I tried to banish it from my head. "Extremely."
"Because...?"

I took a deep breath, concentrating for one moment on the burning thirst. Feeling it,
managing it, proving my dominion over it. It would never control me again-I willed that to
be true. I would be safe for her.
I stared at the welcome clouds without seeing them, wishing I could believe that my
determination would make any difference if I were hunting when I crossed her scent.

"When we hunt...we give ourselves over to our senses," I told her, thinking through each
word before I spoke it. "Govern less with our minds. Especially our sense of smell. If you
were anywhere near me when I lost control that way..."

I shook my head in agony at the thought of what would-not what could, but what would -
surely happen then.

I listened to the spike in her heartbeat, and then turned, restless, to read her eyes.
Bella's face was composed, her eyes grave. Her mouth was pursed just slightly in what I
guessed was concern. But concern for what? Her own safety? Or my anguish? I continued to
stare at her, trying to translate her ambiguous expression into sure fact.

She gazed back. Her eyes grew wider after a moment, and her pupils dilated, though the
light had not changed.

My breathing accelerated, and suddenly the quiet in the car seemed to be humming, just
like in the darkened biology room this afternoon.

The pulsing current raced between us again, and my desire to touch her was, briefly,
stronger even than the demands of my thirst.

The throbbing electricity made it feel like I had a pulse again. My body sang with it. Like was
human.

More than anything in the world, I wanted to feel the heat of her lips against mine. For one
second, I struggled desperately to find the strength, the control, to able to put my mouth so
close to her skin...

She sucked in a ragged breath, and only then did I realize that when I had started breathing
faster, she had stopped breathing altogether.

I closed my eyes, trying to break the connection between us.

No more mistakes. I stopped breathing; I would not breathe again until I left the car.

Bella's existence was tied to a thousand delicately balanced chemical processes, all so easily
disrupted.

The rhythmic expansion of her lungs, the flow of oxygen, was life or death to her. The
fluttering cadence of her fragile heart could be stopped by so many stupid accidents or
illnesses or...by me.

I did not believe that any member of my family would hesitate if he or she were offered a
chance back-if he or she could trade immortality for mortality again.
Any one of us would stand in fire for it. Burn for as many days or centuries as were
necessary.
Most of our kind prized immortality above anything else.

There were even humans who craved this, who searched in dark places for those who could
give them the blackest of gifts...

Not us. Not my family. We would trade anything to be human. But none of us had ever been
as desperate for a way back as I was now.

I stared at the microscopic pits and flaws in the windshield, like there was some solution
hidden in the glass. The electricity had not faded, and I had to concentrate to keep my
hands on the wheel.

My right hand began to sting without pain again, from when I'd touched her before.

"Bella, I think you should go inside now."

She obeyed at once, without comment, getting out of the car and shutting the door behind
herself. Did she feel the potential for disaster as clearly as I did?

Did it hurt her to leave, as it hurt me to let her go? The only solace was that I would see her
soon. Sooner than she would see me. I smiled at that, then rolled the window down and
leaned across to speak to her one more time-it was safer now, with the heat of her body
outside the car.

She turned to see what I wanted, curious.

Still curious, though she'd asked me so many questions today. My own curiosity was entirely
unsatisfied; answering her questions today had only revealed my secrets-I'd gotten little
from her but my own conjectures. That wasn't fair.
"Oh, Bella?"

"Yes?"

"Tomorrow it's my turn."

Her forehead puckered. "Your turn to what?"
"Ask the questions."

Tomorrow, when we were in a safer place, surrounded by witnesses, I would get my own
answers. I grinned at the thought, and then I turned away because she made no move to
leave.

Even with her outside of the car, the echo of the electricity zinged in the air. I wanted to get
out, too, to walk her to her door as an excuse to stay beside her...

No more mistakes. I hit the gas, and then sighed as she disappeared behind me. It seemed
like I was.

Always running toward Bella or running away from her, never staying in place. I would have
to find some way to hold my ground if we were ever going to have any peace.

Contemplating the conundrum of how to stay in one place while I drove around aimlessly
wasn't particularly helpful, yet I didn't want to go home.
I was stalling, waiting as long as I could before walking into the arguments that I was sure to
be the centre of when I got there.

They all knew now that Bella had found out the truth.

I suppose it could look cowardly of me to postpone my inevitable return home.

Perhaps the fact that I didn't care if Rosalie trashed my car meant that my mental health
was in question, but in truth, I was just tired of fighting.

I didn't want to listen to their thoughts, annoyances, accusations, or worry.

Ever since I met Bella I'd been in a civil war. Almost entirely an internal war and I was both
the enemy and the ally.

In that moment I almost lost control, and started to Breathe, Inhaling deeply was all I
wanted, to feel the burning down my throat...

The burning, wanting. The needing. As I knew the burning needed to continue as for when
it remained, she was safe. Alive.

The ally... however the enemy... the monster, the burning hammering down my throat, to
taste her scent on my tongue- her scent drawing me to her, pulling her close and crushing
her neck into my teeth- No! I stopped myself a split- second after I started to feel the dull
ache in my throat. No mistakes.

This mental exhaustion was beyond anything I'd ever experienced as a vampire.
 It didn't seem possible, yet I couldn't escape the feeling. There was no alternative besides
this.

The war might never end and I would have to learn to live with that.

Regardless, I couldn't stay away all evening.

I turned the car around and drove towards home. To make my nightly appearance
The drive home was slower than usual, but faster at the same time.

Slow because I was driving slower than I normally did, perhaps because I'm getting used to
slowing down for Bella.

However to became Quicker, because I spent the entire drive thinking about her.

Again, I found myself pondering about how the simple touch of my fingers to her face still
set my hand on fire.

How the softness and warmth of her skin lingered, like the part of me that touched her
would never forget it.

How I could never allow myself to do anything more than that simple action, but that I
ached to.

And mostly, thinking about how euphoric I felt after doing it. No mistakes.

As I snaked down the long driveway to the house, my family’s internal voices attacked me.

He'd better not hurt her! - Is he absolutely sure? - Rose… Babe, she had to figure it out
sometime- I don't want him taking any chances. All their voices rambling at once, I moved
my attention to Esme's mind. The silent mind. The quiet voice within loud voices screaming
inside my head.

She was looking out the back window toward the garage, where Rosalie was disassembling
my car. Poor boy. Going through all that he is, and Rose has to do this.
"Alice?" Esme said aloud, "are you sure we shouldn't… intervene?"

Alice shook her head.

"Trust me. Our lives will be easier if we leave her alone right now."

Alice didn't bring to mind what vision had made her assure everyone that letting Rosalie
disassemble my car was the best outlet for her anger, but I did see her newest vision.

Rosalie ignoring me. I could live with that.

That, in itself, was almost worth losing my car. I could always buy a new sports car, and it
wasn't like I had a chance to use it much- a prop- another toy.

He deserves better than that. He's trying so hard. Esme thought, but Rosalie wasn't ruining
it.
No, she was just taking it apart piece by piece to get to the tiny oil pressure unit that I'd let
her replace years earlier.

Parts of, not only the engine, but the interior, hood, seats, tires, and anything that could be
removed without damage were scattered over the lawn.

It was a depressing sight.

Though Rosalie's voice was even as she answered Emmett's questions, she was still angry.

Her thoughts were smug through the anger and somewhat victorious as she took back what
was hers in the most inconvenient way possible.
Self-centred as always, I tried to ignore her and everything outside my home as I listened to
the more important discussion indoors.

Jasper's unsaid thoughts were just as angry as his external ones which I viewed from the
others minds. Reckless.

“How long do we let her stay human when she knows too much as it is?” I'd known how
upset Jasper and Rosalie would be when they knew that Bella had found out, but it was too
late to give them the unprepared speech I'd yet to come up with.

I was surprised when I realized that Jasper was preparing his own speech.

It wasn't like him to bring a topic of argument up. I was suddenly apprehensive and sped up
as I followed the winding driveway.

"Every moment she spends with him puts us at risk, Carlisle," Jasper was saying, "They have
been seen together, and if this ends badly there are sure to be questions." His thoughts were
calculating and logical, but he mainly felt protective of Alice.

Worrying about her sadness, as if her new best friend died before she even got to be
introduced.

"You see!" Rosalie screeched from the backyard as she tossed another screw into the grass.
"We should have dealt with her when we had the chance!" She'd heard Jasper of course and
her mental insults were punctuated with a clank as she tossed the muffler onto the hood of
my car, which were only a few feet away from the river bank.

Esme watched Rosalie's progress in disbelief, as I sped up to the house.

 "That wouldn't have helped, Rosalie," Carlisle assured her evenly, speaking loud enough so
she could hear him. "He's falling in love with her just as Alice predicted, and Bella would
have had to find out the truth at some point."

"I wasn't referring to killing her, but you must see, Carlisle," Jasper went on, "That he is not
strong enough to change her. If he tried, he would fail and she must be changed soon. It is
the safest way to proceed." Leave no evidence.

That was why Jasper was arguing with Carlisle. He was trying to convince Carlisle to turn her.

I remembered the vision of Bella, pale with red eyes again.

Her expression fathomless, forced into a soulless existence because of my own stupidity.
The fury towards Jasper was seething, In that second the underline hate for him was
unbearable.

I took in a deep breath, inhaling her scent, a reflex reaction.

It took less than a second, for the monster to return. I felt the steering wheel cumbering
under my fingers as my muscles tightened,
Her scent still lingered fairly strong in the car, my throat burned as the air filled my being,
venom round my teeth. No mistakes!

I was not looking forward to what would happen next.

Their thoughts were interrupted as I pulled closer. They obviously heard my car approach.

I got out of the car, dazed by the monster in my reflection from the car;

I walked towards the house, slowly taking deep breaths of the fresh air.

The effect was instantaneous myself control shimmering just above the monster’s grip,
Carlisle heard me coming and knew that I'd caught the last part of their conversation.

I was into the house, standing near the entrance by the piano with no idea how I got there.

Calm down, Edward, Jasper thought, the fury and anxiety radiating from me, you must see
that it's the easiest way,

"Easiest for who?" I glared at him “I'm not going to end her life for convenience."

Carlisle turned to me, Let me finish speaking, Edward. And moved to face Jasper, "Bella's
transformation is between Edward and her. We have no right to force either him or her to
make that decision."

Jasper never turned his head away from me, still locked in eye contact asked, surveying the
tension around the room.
"What is the likely-hood of Bella surviving Saturday?"
"Hopefully, not much," Rosalie muttered as she tossed a wrench to Emmett.

"Rosalie…" sternly tone from Esme, turning back to look through the window, "I don't want
to hear any more from you. You're getting your part back after this but if you don’t stop
pushing so help me”
I seen through my mother’s eyes Rosalie nodding, and didn't say anything more, but I knew
She’d prefer Bella's death than have her join our family at this moment in time.

Her reasoning was utterly ridiculous though and I brushed her thoughts away like the
toothless insults that they were.

Alice was automatically at Jasper’s side.

"I'm sixty percent sure that Bella will be fine.” Alice chimed “It's a smaller number than I'd
like, but it’s better than nothing.”

She looked over towards me, her eyes full of compassion. You're stronger than you give
yourself credit for, Edward. Just be careful… she's already like a sister to me. Her eyes glazed
over as she concentrated.

I saw in her mind again the meadow with Bella looking at me and sunshine on us both.

Rainbows danced across her face, her eyes were deep pools of wonder, and then the vision
was hazier, more blurry.

It was hard to see it clearly, but I was almost sure that in the vision my ear was pressed to
Bella's heart.

I gasped, how could I be so close to her? Was that right? The possible futures blurred
through Alice's mind, my reaction affecting them.

But I couldn't be sure of what I'd seen. Could that really be a possibility?

I was suddenly elated and equally devastated, because I wasn't strong enough.

The blurry futures so jumbled by my own insecurity showed the possibility of her death as
well. One minute I'm close to her and the next she's lifeless, broken in my arms.

I wish you'd let me talk to her. I wish you'd let me at least meet her before you possibly take
her away from me.

Her thoughts made my entire body tense up. She didn't deserve it, she was only concerned
for the same reasons I was, but I growled at her thoughts.

Carlisle and Esme watched me curiously, puzzling over the conflicting expressions that
played across my face.
Jasper was weighing Alice's feelings of growing confidence, as well as sensing my own
conflict while the visions played out.

I was seething, but it was directed inward. I was trying to convince myself of this, and it
wasn't working.

Alice just nodded, resigned, and started planning. “Everything is fine Jasper, please leave it
to us.” The tension lasted only a few seconds then Jasper nodded, the room suddenly
calmed.

"There's still a chance of course, but Edward path is getting clearer that he won't hurt her,
the odds are definitely better.”

I groaned, was it good enough?

She looked at me and silently apologized. I'm sorry about earlier. I freaked out, but it's
changing all the time. I don't think you will hurt her. You must be doing something right.

"We'll need to hunt. The day before, we'll hunt, and it should help a little. Make sure
someone knows who she's with, that should help with your conscience." Alice’s normal high
voice reappearing.

"She won't tell her father," I said, somewhat understanding why a teenage girl would be
slightly reluctant to explain to her father that she'd be spending the day alone with a
boy…"but Jessica Stanley thinks we'll be in Seattle." As soon as I said this, I heard a quiet hiss
from outside.

I turned my head towards the bombardment of Rosalie's thoughts.

This is ridiculous! He's just begging for us to have to move again. There's no way he'll be able
to resist her when they're alone, and here they are trying to make sure people know about it

The moment Esme Hissed, it ended,

Just ignore her; Alice thought shifting my attention, having Jessica know is probably good
enough. Her thoughts became sarcastic, knowing what Jessica was like. She's not the
brightest person, but she'll probably be able to put two and two together if she doesn't come
back after spending the day with you.

She raised her eyebrows, and stared at me, almost as if she were willing me to be stronger
than I was. Her worry and tension rolled off of her in waves, and I had to stop this
conversation before I broke the plans off with Bella.

Jasper spoke with great confidence “I will stand by Alice’s decision.” Noting Carlisle’s hand
on his shoulder.
 I read my own euphoric and despairing feelings in Jasper's mind as he thought of his own
confidence in Alice; however Alice and I knew how quickly the further could change in a
snap decision. That's where the problem laid.

"Is her smell less appealing to you then?" Carlisle asked, curious as usual. Or have you simply
gained more strength by resisting

"No," I admitted feeling ashamed again, "But I have noticed that it's easier to resist and
ignore my instincts when I'm around her often."

“Ah, of course.” Carlisle nodded. She is good for you.

I wanted to roll my eyes, what he'd learned to endure was far beyond what I was capable of;
It did however bring me hope.

My brief thought trail was interrupted by Esme's...joy, Can it be? Esme thought, It will work
out…I'm so glad. What a sweet girl she must be… She still wants to spend time with him… of
course she would.

Emmett entered the room just then, since, apparently, Rosalie was finished using him as a
tool rack.

"Hey, sorry about the car, Edward," he said quietly. I'll help you put it back together if you
want.

He told me internally so that Rosalie wouldn't hear his promise.

Or I could get you a new one. One where, the top speed is one-ninety. He grinned at the
thought of an even more powerful sports car. Only, don't tell Rose it was my idea.

"Don't worry about it." I shrugged, answering all his thoughts at once.

A disassembled car was the least of my worries at the moment. Perhaps I'd donate the
parts to some college or trade school and give the mechanic students something
memorable to put together.

And a new faster car wouldn't do me much good when Bella could barely stand it when I
drove at a hundred. I wanted to have her with me more than I wanted another toy. I was
still numbingly looking at Alice. Consternating. On the blurry black, moving glimpses of the
further.

Emmett looked over at Jasper, “Shall we? Or are you still playing solider?” they moved
towards the back wall near Esme, and slid the connecting chess boards towards them.

Carlisle disappeared off to his office, closely followed by Esme.

Rosalie entered the room I seen from Alice’s eyes and I had to look with my own, looking at
someone from their eyes even though they matched the skill of my own, it did not do the
imposing sight justice.

Rosalie’s cream suede coat was ripped and torn down both arms, her hair was covered with
soil, grease, grass and oil her face was black as were her hands, she was pondering if she
could break a nail she would have broke them all.

Suppressing a smile as I remembered she looked very similar the first day I met her.

She shot me a disgusted look and fleeted upstairs, focusing her thoughts on perfecting her
vanity. All thanks to that idiot, more outfits ruined! It will take all night to fix my hair.

With Rosalie it was always about vanity. Her mind was a shallow pool, with few surprises.

The sound of flowing water from upstairs drowning out her thoughts.

I turned to the piano bench as I ran my fingers up the scales, trying to find fault with the
pitch, another reflex reaction.

Alice nipped to Jasper’s side raising her eyebrow, I watched through Emmett’s eyes, she
was looking smug “Why don’t you let me tell you who will win... Or at least guide you this
game has been going on forever.”

I half smiled as I seen the vision of Jasper winning by some careful movement with his rook,
as Emmett was breaking apart a tree in his frustration, I chuckled.

Emmett growled “Stay out of it”

“But I want a turn.” Alice had put on her whining tone; she usually gets her way with it.

But the vision of her saying the words and being ignored happened as she knew it would.

Why do I even bother, I hate knowing what will happen next! She thought shaking her head;
her eye’s drifted to the sofa. Deciding watching TV, the vision of her sprawled sullenly
flicking through channels until she found something she found time consuming.

She smiled and followed through with it.

I started playing the composing song I started, was it really just days ago when this song
was created?

After the events of the past week it felt like years.

Everything was so new- yet it all remained the same.

However Bella, now knew the truth yet, she was still not running away from me, like I was
from her now.
 I was locked in a internal war with the monster and myself control a fifty- fifty fight which
even Alice did not know the outcome.

I started playing, still trying to make a change; I once again toyed with the bridge.

Trying to add Alice’s contribution early but this off set the rhythm, changing it back I was
beginning to realize the bit I wanted to change was the inevitable end.

I took a deep breath and continued playing, auto pilot mode.

I needed a distraction, although my eyes had never left the scales, as my hands were flying
across the keys, repeating the lullaby, trying to find a fault where I could add another octave
to take it to my desired direction.

I was absorbing the house with my mind.

Emmett was egging Jasper on in his head, Take it... go on take it! He left his queen exposed
in his vain attempt to check mate him with the rook to its right, go on... yes, yes...

Jasper looked expressionless.

As they had been moving the pieces around the eight boards they had been utilizing, once
the pieces left a unoccupied board it was taken away to reduce the playing field.

Esme was illustrating some amendments to the blue prints for Rosalie and Emmett’s new
home to Carlisle, they were in his office “I know it’s not till next year but I want to be
prepared” she smiled”this wall and the exterior” she was flying across the documents with a
marker pen she was circling as she went “and the adjacent...” Carlisle looked amused; Esme
was outlining the reinforced structure of the building.

His thoughts drifted back to the previous houses that Rosalie and Emmett had shared, and
consequently destroyed by their physical love. With that his attention shifted to Esme.

Your cue to leave now Edward... Carlisle always had an instinctive brain whenever I was
around to respect his privacy, I quickly followed suite

Rosalie was in her room perfecting her profile, admiring her own image in the mirror her
thoughts were a mixture of resentment and irritation at least my nails can’t break... I will
need to completely... I rolled my eyes and shifted my attention back to my music.

I was still unable to find a chink in the songs armour; the bass set the hook unquestionable,
the ending... unending

I continued playing the auto pilot unfazed; playing was second nature to me, I still needed a
distraction, realising that tomorrow, I would finally get some answers to my never ending
questions.
To have her describe tastes, and sights she has enjoyed and seen through her eyes, finally
get to understand the way she feels, and what she thinks about, as the music played I
started compiling lists within lists inside my head, of things to question her about.

And I only stopped when Carlisle interrupted me, he was preparing to leave for the early
shift at the hospital, See you later Edward... He thought as he headed out towards his car.

I looked up the room around me deserted.

Alice’s voice chimed, “Where leaving soon.”

“See you at school.” I spoke lightly

Not for that long… She thought as she watched me walking towards my room to change into
new clothes.

Her eyes glazed over as she flashed visions of Bella and I sitting at our lunch table alone, the
four of them sitting in my old spot.

She was sad that I was so occupied nowadays, but the happiness she felt for me finally
breaking free from my angst ridden years of depression overrode that.

Good. I didn't want my family too upset by my obsession.

Alice smiled and waved her tiny hand at me. Vanishing out the door. I could hear Rosalie
angered thoughts from the garage; she was in her car sheathing that she had to drive again,
if any one of them juveniles touches my car again!.. I remembered the group of young
adolescent boys surrounding her car in the school car park. I smiled.

Emmett was talking to Alice as she got in to the car’s back seat next to Jasper “is he picking
her up again?” “Dose she not have a truck?”

“Have you met Edward Emmett? Jasper said suppressing a grin.

“Yea Jazz your right you must confess he is prone to overact” Alice giggled

Emmett chuckled. “Self-torture… yep… just like a mad-man.”

Rosalie looked furious that they were all enjoying them self’s slamming her foot on the
accelerator as the car sped off at break neck speed.

I changed and headed back downstairs, saying goodbye to Esme, She was outside humming
to herself while sorting out the pieces of my car Rosalie dismantled in to some ordered
chaos.

I headed towards my car, pausing only to take a deep breath as I was putting the key into
the ignition, the car was alive heat flowing from the vents the music humming low, the dull
ache flaring to life in my throat, however the scent now diluted with the fresh morning air
the monster still liked it, I had to focus on the part of my brain that was still compiling a list
of never ending questions as I travelled the memorised route to her house.

As I neared Forks, I parked my car a block away from Bella's house.

I could hear the babble of morning conversation throughout the houses surrounding me,
the usual drone of morning routines. “Have you seen my...” “You’re going to be late...” “Are
you till in there?” “Breakfast’s ready.”

The hum of their day to day lives I ignored out of boredom.

I zoned in on the one that mattered. I chuckled as the one that actually mattered to me I
could not hear.

“That was the plan." Bella replied, obviously answering someone's question.

Her voice had a sort of nervous hint to it. I searched the thoughts of her father, but could
only make out hope, and worry.

"And you're sure you can't make it back in time for the dance?" I stiffened. They were
discussing the day Bella and I would be spending together.

"I'm not going to the dance, Dad." Her voice was flat, and I wondered why she was so
annoyed by that topic.

They were answered with Charlie’s next statement.

"Didn't anyone ask you?" It was hard for him, discussing this with his daughter.

I could make out that he didn't want her to be spending too much with boys, but also
worried that she would be too alone. I'm not a father, nor will I ever be, but I could
empathize with that.

It's a girl's choice." She replied simply.

She didn't feel the need to gloat, that three boys had already asked her to accompany them
and she'd declined them all.

Or the fact that almost every other boy had the thought in their mind that maybe they
should ask her.

Or the fact that she'd chosen to spend the day with me instead of attending.

"Oh." He let the topic slide.

Within a few minutes he was getting ready to leave. With a goodbye to Bella I could hear
him heading clumsily for his cruiser.
 Is this where Bella gets her clumsiness? Hardly surprising as her mental silence stems from
him. The door thudded closed, engine started with a roar he took off towards the day
ahead.

I put the car into drive, waiting for him to pass the road end.

I drove around the corner pulling into Bella's drive way.

I waited in the car, watching as she peeked out her window. Her face brightened as she
spotted my car, I smiled at the surprised look on her face. Hadn't she figured out by now
that I was unable to stay away from her?

She disappeared from the window; I heard each step she took as she bounced down the
stairs, she should take her time... always rushing never considering the consequences if she
fell.

I thought about knocking on her door so I could properly escort her to the car, but I wasn't
ready for that after all, feeling the dull ache tighten with in my throat, I was still preparing
myself for her scent when she entered the car.

My smile held the monster liked that.

Before I had time to wonder what the proper etiquette for our newfound situation was,
Bella was leaving the house, I watched surreptitiously as each of her long flowing locks of
hair waved around on her back as she turned to lock the door.

Her hair was damp, messy coiled around her shoulder, showing glimpses of her cheek
bones, as it waived around her face in the morning breeze. Her book bag swinging, sagging
under the weight slightly, the turtle neck top tight clinging to her skin, revealing the
extraordinary way her collar bones curled.

The blue denim oh her jeans, flowing like water sculpting along shape of her body, down her
legs. Offsetting her skin colour to look like cream. No mistakes!

I tried to calm myself, to remind myself to tone down my reactions and ordered my list of
questions to the surface in my mind.

With the easiest ones first, of course keep it light.

She walked over to my car, pausing at the door.

It reminded me of yesterday, stopping before she left, her hand closed around the handle, I
took one last deep breath of her diluted scent before the door swung open.

"Good morning," I said, my non-scary voice forced. It never easy around her

“How are you today?"

I was still smiling, mainly at her expression now as she took her seat.

She was smiling, her cheeks tinted with rose as she blushed slightly. Staring at me with
those wonder filled eyes again, like she was still waiting for me to disappear. I looked over
her face, seeing the tiredness

"Good, thank you." She replied, she sounded as though she were

The dark circles under her eyes deceived her;

"You look tired." I remarked, my eyes lifting my gaze up to her eyes. Searching her face for
signs of distress. Her night had.

“I couldn't sleep." She stated, and her blush thickened. The monster liked that.

She grabbed some hair and threw it in front of her face, as though she were embarrassed by
it.

This aggravated me, if I couldn't read her mind I should at least be allowed seeing her face
to watch her reactions, and trying to figure out what they meant. Frustrating,

"Neither could I," I replied, smirking as I started the car. The heat flowed from the vents
making her feel more comfortable.

“I guess that's right.” I suppose I slept just a little bit more than you did." She replied, a hint
of sarcasm in her voice.

"I'd wager you did." Auto response.

"So what did you do last night?"

I couldn't help but laugh, always interested in me

"Not a chance. It's my day to ask questions." I grinned.

I watched as her eyebrows pulled together slightly, her forehead creasing as she considered
that.

"Oh, that's right," she said in a tone that made me think she wished I'd forgotten. "What do
you want to know?"

I could not answer, the moment I’d been dreading since I left the house.

My muscles tensed, and I prepared for the first breath. The concentrated scent hit me like a
tidal wave, Fire burning down my throat, venom dripping from my teeth, her scent drawing
me in to her throat... Potent, would it ever desensitize me? I tightened my lips and locked
my face staring through the windshield. Consternate on the question!

“What's your favourite colour?" I asked.

The irony appeared to me, the girl at my side, who I wanted to hold close and crush her
neck into my teeth, and I was asking her favourite colour.

"It changes from day to day." She replied

How frustrating she was! Keeping the simplest of details from me but this answer, at least,
gave me something to work with.

"What's your favourite colour today?"

"Probably brown," she answered, glancing down at her sweater.

I found it strangely odd that brown should be a favourite colour, the same colour of soil that
I may end up burying you in.

I snorted the irony again twice in as many minuets of the whole situation. I felt my resolve
strengthen as my self control returned. Only Bella’s backward thinking would pull me out of
the monsters grasp. The dull ache in my throat was just that, Dull.

"Brown?" I repeated, raising my eyebrow. Scepticism diverted inward.

“Sure. Brown is warm. I miss brown. Everything that's supposed to be brown…tree trunks,
rocks, dirt…it's all covered up with squashy green stuff here." She complained.

I couldn’t understand that. Her reactions were always so frustrating. Fascinating... Brown as
its self is boring, drab nowhere of notice; however the soft, silk like brown hair... her deep
brown eyes, I stared into the pool of her deep brown eyes, filled with sincerity, the silent
doors to her mind.

And agreed with her

"You're right. Brown is warm," I said,

I inhaled, the heat from the car had saturated her scent, the monster stayed quiet the
burning gone, ache still present like a pleasurable pain I come accustomed too.

The monster cowered away like a small child; I felt my self control at its highest. The image
casted in Alice’s mind, Bella, the meadow, me. My head on her chest taking in every heart
beat, counting every breath, completely solid, not blurry, not flickering, unmovable

Without thinking I lifted my hand, I hesitated, Can I do this?

The monster was silent... for how long?

 I brush her chestnut hair back behind her shoulder. It felt like silk threads between my
marble fingers.

I put my hand back on the steering wheel, gripping it tightly. Too tightly I felt it whine under
the pressure of my granite hands.

We were almost at the school, the route was imprinted on the part of me driving, regulated
like my speed, as my reflexes parked the car for me, my instincts noted Rosalie’s car missing.

I breathed deeply once more Intoxicated by the scent, I could taste it. Flames erupting
down my throat, I turned to look at her staring into her deep melting chocolate eyes, the
monster was growling testing my resolve.

"What music is in your CD player right now?" the quickest distraction I could think of.

It took a moment for my mood to sway, her expression changed embarrassment... emotion?
Irritating.... Fascinating what are you thinking?

The name of the artist was familiar, but why the strange expressions I smiled as the monster
was solemn, she the weakest most delicate creature- silenced a demon.

I reached for the concealed compartment, searching through the CD's my family and I kept
in the car, locating it One of Emmett's favourites, passing it to her making sure our skin
never touched, the eccentric current would revive the monster.

“Debussy to this?" My eyebrow rose, of all the ways to calm me. Replacing the CD we exited
the car.

Inhaling deep the morning air hit me hard with a refreshing blast, the monster had gone...
for now.

The bored slow human, mundane pace I was restricted to in the crowded parking lot
prevented me from reaching her door before she opened it

I contented myself with walking close to her, but kept my hands in my pockets so I wouldn't
be tempted to take her hand in mine as I wanted to do.

We entered the school.

As we walked throughout the day I continued with my list of questions. We talked about her
favourite books, why she liked them, how many times she had read them, which ones she
hated, and the reasons behind it.

Music, styles, artists, genre.

Movies she enjoyed, loved and detested, places she has seen, places she been, places she
has yet to be, where she wants to go, places she wants to be. Fascinating
 The day was reminiscent as my feelings, slowing down to be together was like the world
around up was speeding up, time whirling around us like air, question after question I
absorbed it all like her scent, feeling each answer like the scorching burn in my throat.

The low hum inside my head of other peoples conscious incoherent ramblings were numb,
like they were opposed to talking whispering in their wake. Even though they were
whispering I still knew.

The one thing about being a vampire I truly appreciate is my mental capacity without it I
would not have been able to process the room around me, I would have missed my family,
and there reassessing of the situation which was warming slightly towards Bella.

“There is a significant change in him... his moods are happy I think” Jasper was talking to
Emmett.

“What do you mean you think?”

“Easy rose...” Emmett said his voice a little curt

“I’m just stating the obvious” Rosalie continued “He feels moods, how can he not know what
happy feels like?”

“That’s what I’m feeling...”Jasper said abruptly“there is happiness there but there is
something else, he’s starting to feel like Esme... contentment? I’m not sure... off putting
somehow he’s not had this feeling I can’t analyze it”

“Yea you should have seen him in Spanish the other day...” Emmett cut in ahead of rose, “he
really shook things up”

“Don’t forget Emmett you’re cutting Spanish short today” Rosalie added “I think purple for
the template... maybe jade? Her mind was full of colours her design project I assumed.

Alice was looking at Jasper, playing with her prop, her food “don’t worry Edward, I’m not
coming over it will be very soon now... Think I’m going to look forward to Sunday!”

It finished as soon as it commenced, the blurry vision shifted in to view and retreated as
Alice started recited the alphabet backwards.

I would have missed Mike Newton moping; I might have not minded missing this

However it was amusing to see.

When did I become so unpopular?

Why am I sitting alone? Watching Mike Newton depressed was strangely

pleasurable He was sat at the back of the cafeteria with the table to himself,
 Angela is all over Ben...Jessica off sick He looked up towards Bella and me and Bella
is dating Cullen! How twisted that! He looked away from me and glanced towards
the corner. I left his thoughts there.

Angela Weber was sitting with Ben Cheney were in the far corner “she’s my friend
Ben I have to tell her” she was looking at him reproachfully “are you sure that’s what
you heard? They have been together for a while now”

“Let me talk to him Angela... find out the reasons first” Ben looked anxious, like he had just
been caught doing something he shouldn’t

“Ok fine but make it quick... I don’t want to have to wait anymore than a few days, she’s my
friend” she looked at him all anger disappearing from her face,

“Don’t do that! You look cute when you’re angry” Ben smiled they moved closer together.

Even all this was going on in various parts of my brain I never missed one question with Bella

We were in the cafeteria. The table all to ourselves

Some questions where easy, an instant answer

Other questions triggered more questions

Some questions were slower, sluggish unquestionable answers

I asked her another question.

The answer was instantaneous, “Topaz” So I thought. However her reaction was a trigger
question.

I asked about her reaction.

The answer was slow, sluggish. I can't read her mind, and she goes out of her way to keep it
that way. An unquestionable answer.

I asked her to tell me.

She looked away, denying me her eyes, my only reaction judger.

“It’s the colour of your eyes today” she replied, fiddling with a silk hair strand.

"I suppose if you asked me in two weeks I'd say onyx."

Some questions were just like that question an instant answer, an answer that triggered
more questions, a sluggish response, and an unquestionable answer.
 Just frightening, dangerous Truth.

I asked another question...

We were in biology; Mr. Banner had a audio visual experience for us to endure again.

I felt this way before, when I’m hunting.

The day was still moving at a slow pace for us but, everything blurring past us there was
silence, we were not talking, dead silence, deep calm in a room humming with chatting,
internal and external.

The instinct took command; the monster was loose, not ferocious but tame. But loose.

The main lights went off. The only dim light flickering in the room form the small TV at the
front

Human eyes, weak eyes, drowned by the darkness the lack of light was no problem for my
eyes, Hunters eyes another thing I appreciated.

I inhaled deeply against my better judgment; the numb burning flaring down my throat, my
eyes swirled black, with thirst venom rising in my mouth as her scent came crashing into me,
assaulting, Taunting, mocking.

Drawing me to her the static in the air around us hummed through my body, that strange
pull between us attacked me again.

I moved further away human Instincts taking over

I stopped breathing, but never took my eyes off her; I owed myself that much.

Bella started to lean forward, her eyes glued to the television, unfocused. I watched her,
watched as she brought her arms up to the table folded, resting her chin upon them.

I watched the skin over her knuckles, pale slightly as she gripped the table. I noticed the
change in her breathing, coming faster than usual.

My eyes were entirely fixated on the beautiful creature sitting right beside me, within my
reach...

The chair never moved, inhuman instincts taking over now, I was edging closer, her scent
was not pulling me in, I never restarted breathing the monster wanted that.

The heat from her body was pulling me towards her like a magnetic force; inches away...
mere inches from our skin touching.

Electric sparks, silently crackling between us, the flickers nearly visible in the small space
between us.
Pulling me towards her.

Her neck creeping slowly toward me a few more seconds... just a few more.

The lights switched on, I was instantly sitting up in my chair like I never moved. My eyes
hadn’t.

I rose from my chair and walked around her waiting for her, she followed suit

I wanted to ask another question.

I could not breathe; I couldn’t ask her another question

I walked with her to the final lesson Gym for her; Spanish for me, this school was like a
memorised hedge maze, a building within more buildings.

We were almost there, walking close together, always watching

My finger tips tingled again with that same fire I'd felt yesterday, when I allowed myself to
touch her face.

My list of questions disregarded for the moment as the part of my mind inventorying them
was required; I tried to convince myself why I should not allow myself to touch her face.

It was a good memory.

I wondered if I'd feel that same fire, when our skin touched.

By the entrance, against my better judgement.

I reached slowly up to her temple and stroked down to her jaw, her skull, cheek bones, and
her neck breakable, weak, delicate.

My hand was now on fire, the ache in my throat deepened and the tingle went through my
arm.

I turned, on my heel and walked away.

I heard her footsteps fade in to the building as she entered.

Away from Bella I started breathing, it had started raining mildly, the dry dull ache
reseeding, and my head became clear as it split off in to it various pastimes. My muscles
easing I hadn’t noticed them becoming tense another reflex. The venom still dampening my
teeth as the memory of her scent lingered, within a section of my mind.

Questions started compiling again, the low hum of people’s minds became slightly louder as
I entered the main school building.
 Passing Angela Weber on the stairs I wonder if Ben has said anything yet?

Her thoughts became distant as I noticed the look on her face; she shot me a grave look...
part of me wondered why.

I caught sight of Emmett. He noticed me and nodded.

Walking to Spanish class

Hey, bro. Any scheming plans to pair the students off today? A grin crept on his face, and he
was trying hard not to laugh.

His mind flicking back to yesterday’s activity with Ben Cheney, you still owe me for that.

“I haven’t forgotten.” I spoke quickly so normal ears could not comprehend

We entered Spanish.

Emmett handed me my books. As we took our usual seats,

You’re going to have to start bringing your own things soon... rose is starting to bug me
about it.

It was easy to have Emmett bring my things for me, leaving both hands free to assist Bella’s
clumsiness.

I looked at him as we set up our props; I’m not complaining... he thought as he looked at my
face, she is just being pushy; she made me take her BMW home this morning... so no one
could touch it... she is starting to act like you, crazy!

I noted one of my books was ripped up the spine

I nicked it on a tree running back here

“That why your cutting out early?” I asked him

Yea, Alice said it would start to rain just after math, knowing her it would take hours to sort
her hair if it got wet... like I said crazy!

In his mind I saw my face, mixture of amusement, confusion?

Emmett thought looking at me closely, you look different. I was about to comment until, I
was momentarily distracted as Ben Cheney entered the room,

“Thank you for joining us Mr. Cheney” Mrs. Goff said something must be up with him, he’s
never normally late Mrs. Goff thought as his eyes met hers.
 “Sorry Mrs Goff” he said he looked flustered, his cheeks red, a drip of sweat running down
his forehead. His eyes darted to Mrs. Goff, to his seat and finally to me for a split second
then looked at his seat, moving down the tables behind me.

Damn... he’s here today His thoughts were racing, All the day’s he’s ditched... he would have
to be here today!

How am I going to do this? He looks like he would kill me! And his brother is huge! I will have
to move if this ends badly.

His mind raced through the conversation he had with Angela after their Trigonometry class
this morning, the images were crystal clear, the question compiling ceased feeling the Need
to concentrate.

“Hey Angela... Wait up.” he was packing his things in to his bag as Angela was getting out of
her seat; she turned to him.

“What’s up Ben” her eyes were wide with shock, confusion. He was zipping up his book bag,
and turned to look at her as they were making their way for the door.

“I just wanted to ask if you wanted to go to... His voice broke the prom with me.” I could
sense he was nervous however he never left her gaze.

“Em... hmm... Yea!” she said the shock and excitement on her face was beaming.

“Sorry I would have asked you sooner... I just wasn’t sure you would say yes” he continued
shocked by her hesitating Yes!

She looked reproachful “Ok so why ask me now.” her tone confused

“I just”... His voice shaking “I could not forgive myself if you ended up going with someone
else... Or not going.”

She smiled and giggled... “That’s silly” she said

He smiled “yea I guess... what you doing for lunch.” His eyes drifted to her mouth.

“Want to sit with me today?” His voice was hopeful “Sure!” She spoke far too quickly He
liked that.

The images and thoughts changed sharply, to flowers and chocolates? I was briefly lost in
confusion. But through the mind of Mrs. Goff I could see he was smiling.

Ben disappeared from my view as Mrs. Goff suddenly turned to white board, writing the
explanation to a question the girl in the back row asked, I ignored through boredom.

Edward. I need to go... Rose will be pissed if I’m late.

I recognised the thought as Emmet’s; I glanced at the time, forty minutes of our hour long
rant had drawn to a close.

I nodded a fraction of an inch.

“Senora Goff” Emmett spoke politely

Mrs. Goff looked surprised as she turned to Emmett,

Emmett Cullen asking a question? He knows the whole semester inside out... would I be able
to answer anything he does not already know? Her thoughts were worried,

Mrs. Goff, a woman of no more than average intellect, would struggle to pull out anything in
her lecture that would surprise someone holding two graduate degrees

As she looked at him, her eyelashes fluttered, and her heart sped up.

Even if he is intellectually better, look at him... he’s young enough to be my son!

If I didn’t have a hard enough time teaching someone who knows more than me, and so
handsome too.

Too young, get a hold of yourself!

Emmett seemed to have the same effect on Mrs. Goff, as I did with Ms. Cope

That was interesting. When Mrs. Goff and Ms. Cope's pulse quickened, it was because she
found us physically attractive, not because they was frightened.

I was used to that around human females...yet I hadn't considered that explanation for
Bella's racing heart. I rather liked that. Too much, in fact. I smiled

“Yes Emmett” she asked warily, raising an eyebrow.

"Me perdona," He muttered, as he motioned towards the door.

Her internal and external voices spoke at once Phew! - “Of course Emmett”

Another thing I appreciated, the average human would never get away with this type of
study neglecting.

Mrs. Goff turned back to the white board, trying to think of the explanation she was half
was through writing. Too young! Far too young.

Emmett picked up his books and headed towards the door.

Catch you later Edward, as he disappeared out the door. His thoughts of heading to the
woods by the car park to run home for the car were drowned out by Ben Cheney.
 The Big brothers leaving? Maybe I can do this today then... Who am I kidding look at him,
but Angela...

Through his eyes I seen he was looking at me, and his thoughts shifted to images again, he
was in the cafeteria with Angela

They were in the corner; it was earlier this afternoon,

“Thanks for buying my lunch Ben you really didn’t have too”

Angela said she looked thankful and enthusiastic

“Don’t worry about it; I will let you buy me lunch sometime”

His voice was nervous but he never left her sight. Angela looked over at Mike.

“We should have sat with Mike he looks lonely.” she sounded guilty.

“I just want to sit with you... We have never just sat alone before; he will be fine he’s just
acting strangely as Jessica’s sick today.” He added casually

She turned back to him smiling.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Shoot.” he said biting into his apple.

“This morning, when you asked me to the prom... you sounded worried, that someone else
would ask me.”

His eyebrows narrowed as he swallowed the apple bite ... “Yea?”

“You weren’t worried that Mike was going to ask were you?” “Cos he’s with Jessica... Right?”

His body shifted uncomfortably in his seat, Angela looked suspicious.

“No... I mean yes, I was worried that someone would ask you but not Mike, he’s going to the
dance with her on Saturday, and I’m guessing prom too.” The look, like he had been caught
doing something he shouldn’t crept to his face.

“Then why...” Her head never moved but I could see her eyes move to Mike and then to
Bella and me,

The suspicious look on her face slowly fell flat, her lips parted slowly

“Who... Not!” Her eyes quickly moved back to Ben “Tell me!”

Ben moved closer to Angela, he bit his lip looking nervous, but as he was looking in to her
eyes, he did not want to keep it from her.
I already knew what was coming now, why he was late, for class, the strange reaction from
Angela on the stairs. It all made sense. I smiled

“The other day in Spanish, Cullen” He moved his head a fraction of an inch towards me,
“was talking to his brother you know the big guy he’s a senior I think, and he was asking
Edward if he was going to ask you to the prom.”

“But he’d dating Bella, there over there” She moved her eyes over to Bella and me, “They
been dating for a while now... Since they went to Port Angeles.”

She sat back in her chair; she was looking at him reproachfully.

“She’s my friend Ben I have to tell her” She paused and bit her lip, “Are you sure that’s what
you heard? They have been together for a while now.”

“Let me talk to him Angela... find out the reasons first” Ben looked anxious,

“Ok fine but make it quick... I don’t want to have to wait anymore than a few days, she’s my
friend” she looked at him all anger disappearing from her face,

The image shifted, he was just leaving Math class heading towards the stairs.

“Hey!” Angela was on the stairs waving at him. “Have you seen him yet?” Her tone was curt.

“Not yet.” He sounded disappointed.

“I just past him on the stairs looked like he was heading to Spanish.” She said flatly.

“That’s where I’m headed now, I will see him then” he said “but he usually ditches.” His voice
hopeful

Spanish class came back with a snap; Mrs. Goff had tapped my desk “Well?” she was looking
at me

Miles away again... don’t understand how he has passed every test with ease,

“Sorry Mrs. Goff... what did you ask?”

“I was asking about Emmett, will he be rejoining us again today?” Everyone else in the room

would have take her tone as flat, But I knew it was hopeful.

Casting a quick glance at the time told me everything I needed to know, ten minutes to the

end of purgatory.
“Sorry Mrs. Goff I don’t think he will be now.

There was a mixture of thought and speaking, the silent Oh. “I will give you an extra set of

the study material to give to him”

I nodded as she walked away. My mind split in to various tasks, with ten minutes left, I had

four things I needed to concentrate on, I needed to glance over the current subject matter

for my outdated class, come up with a way to help Ben out of his situation.

Compiling questions had already started, while I was checking On Bella Down in gym.

The generic boring Mike Newton was playing badminton for Bella, she was at the back of

the room his mind was a twisted mess of emotions.

He was happy to be getting female’s attention, flying around the room waving his racket, I

didn’t see the appeal.

Everyone is staring!

Chicks dig sports! I’m so glad Jessica’s not here to see this she would throw a fit,

I seen Bella in his eyes, as peeked at her between his swings,

His mind flew back to yesterday; I can’t believe she laughed at me! Jessica’s right she does

this she is better than us, just because she’s dating CULLEN!

His mind became a sour place to be.

I shifted to Coach Clapp he provided the best view of Bella as well as the other students

within the gym.

Bella looked bored counting the minutes till her personal hell was over, she did look out of

place in the gym, like a fire in the middle of a lake,

Maybe poached or grilled I could get away with that today, or should I just stick to fried. But

if I’m going to have it fried maybe I should just try that new burger bar near La push?

His thoughts about food were revolting; it was always just a prop to me, skipping his

breakfast-a new fresh attempt to diet-and the consequent hunger had failed him.

As ever his sentiment was

Start over tomorrow...

Mrs. Goff coughed, It brought me back to Spanish, she was informing the students, of

ending class early due to a staff meeting.

A tedious staff meeting she was ranting.

The class sprang to life people gathering books, and various stationary, Ben was doing the

same. Please leave quickly, please leave quickly! He was ranting his thoughts directed at me.

I had already finished compiling questions, enough for today possibly enough for tomorrow,
the subject material was finished mine and Emmett’s I made up my favour too him, Bella
was safe, her class mates shown me her clumsily failing over herself as she was getting
changed .

And I knew how to help out Ben, I picked up my props as people started to file out, Mrs Goff
was muttering to herself, she had left the staff rotas in the car annoyed with herself.

Grabbing her car keys from her desk as she left the room.

I turned around to face Ben “Excuse me, Benjamin Cheney” he was sliding some papers into
his bag he stopped suddenly, looking up towards me, the room was almost empty.

“I’m not sure if I have ever formally introduced myself... I’m Edward Cullen”

His heart started beating faster, his eyes widened as they looked in to my eyes
“I know who you are, Edward” he said his voice breaking slightly.

“I was just hoping to talk to you for a moment, I wanted to clear up any confusion you may
have regarding Angela”

He looked terrified; the last of the students had left the room. I was lucky the part of my
mind had stopped compiling questions at this point, as I was trying to decipher his
screaming thoughts, of how many ways I was going to hurt him.

“Err... look ...I” He started mumberling, I held up my hand to silence his external babbling

“I just wanted to clear up the little incident from the other day, I have deceived you, placing
you under the illusion that I was planning to ask Angela to the prom”

His mind was racing, thoughts running so quick, shouting, whispering, talking, that if I was
not aware of where we were or the situation, I would have thought I was in a room full of
people.

“You... did?” his voice shook.

I smiled “I had no intention to ask Angela to the prom, I just knew Angela was hoping that
you would ask her, Bella talks about her allot, and since she was not going to ask you I
decided to plant the suggestion” he looked like I had just cleared him of a fatal illness

A smile spreading across his face His thoughts were complicated and disjointing, the part of
my mind that was keeping a track of bells progress was warning me that she would be ready
in a few minutes, I did not have time to decipher them or gage his reaction, I blocked them
to a low hum.

I looked at him once again “I hope you can forgive me.” And with that I turned and left the
room, halfway down the hall I heard him exhale.

It was the most annoying time of the day for me.

Home time, I could usually move at my normal pace around the day, between classes the
students moved slowly not paying attention, usually because there was no incentive to, now
there was incentive people rushing to leave the building, to return to their boring personal
life’s, moving at my pace would be reckless, moving at inconspicuous speed bored, towards
gym.

Apart of my mind was telling me she was leaving gym now, I was standing a few meters
form the entrance way I inhaled deeply as she came through the door, she stopped briefly
surveying me, smiling she blushed slightly, her cheekbones turning the slightest shade pink.
The monster liked, that I liked that the ally and the enemy, I smiled but I could not decide
which one was smiling... I thought both.

I asked another question.

We turned and headed back to the parking lot

I asked another question.

“Are you finished?” she asked. Was she happy? The way she asked that, was it relief?
Fascinating...irritating.

We were outside her house; if I was human I would have sworn we had been there five
minutes, however my mind and my senses were telling me multiple things, my mind was
still compiling questions.

I must admit she had made a slight dent in the list, finding out her sights, senses, feelings,
tastes, emotions finding all the details her mind refused to tell me.

My mind was auto updating the compilation of questions.

My ears were telling me her answerers to my questions, the rain worsening the distant
thunder, around six miles away I assumed.

My eyes were showing me more details, leaves seemed if it was possible sharper, it was
getting darker, her eyes would be diluted by the darkness soon, each rain drop crystal clear,
again my mind telling me around eighty thousand drops had fallen within the vicinity.

My nose was telling me nothing, I disconnected it form the evening, breathing through my
mouth so I could speak, I disconnected it outside gym, after three of my questions I had to
inhale, the scent of her started the burning, the muscle tensing, the venom dripping oozing
toward my lips, I could have contained it through self control, lots of self control! However I
failed to factor the rain, her scent mixed with the rain freed the monster; he would have
been waiting for her when we got back to the car.

I had stopped for a brief moment of questioning, when she asked, she was so perceptive.
Fascinating, I had stopped. The part of my mind I was waiting for had just alerted me

“Not even close”- My mind had thought of twenty six more questions within the brief pause.
“But your father will be home soon.”

“Charlie!” Did she forget about him? Irritating... I would never know.

“How late is it?"

She glanced out the windows, her eyebrows pulling together slightly, creating the small
indent right between her brows.
I followed her gaze outside, and noted the absence of the sun and the dark clouds. Twilight.
Light enough to be noticed, but no sun out… we can roam the streets freely, like the
monsters we are.

"It's twilight," I said in a quiet voice.

I scanned the horizon, thinking about my last twilight as a human.

The memory was foggy, and only in clips.

I felt Bella's eyes on my face, and when I looked over to meet them they were full of
questions.

"It's the safest time of day for us; the easiest time, but also the saddest in a way…the end of
another day, the return of the night. Darkness is so predictable, don't you think?"

I thought I was smiling but I was not sure, still lost in memories.

"I like the night. Without the dark, we'd never see the stars," her face contorted, a frown
forming at the corners of her mouth.

"Not that you see them here much." I was laughing; here words hit me like jaspers mood
control only better, grinning at her.

I heard the faint sound of Charlie's car coming closer. Two minuets the part of my mind
telling me,

"Charlie will be here in a few minutes. So, unless you want to tell him that you'll be with me
Saturday…." I raised an eyebrow, trying to gage her reaction.

"Thanks, but no thanks." She replied, she collected her books, stretching, was she sore?
Stiff? Frustrating! Again I would never know.

"So is it my turn tomorrow, then?" she asked politely.

"Certainly not! I told you I wasn't done, didn't I?" around two thousand and sixty six my
mind told me. Reflex.

"What more is there?" she gasped, two thousand and sixty nine my mind updated me... keep
it light I told myself.

"You'll find out tomorrow" I said simply,

I reached over to open her door. Her heartbeat sped, I froze halfway.

I had heard this mind before; it wasn’t a place I wanted to be.

 This might get awkward. But, we've been friends for how long? I can't even remember the
years. Our treaty didn’t cover this, does this still constitute silence? If I don’t speak with
Charlie, and this turns bad, and he finds out I knew he'll … who's car is that? I saw my Volvo
in his mind.

"Not good." I muttered. The monster was gone, replaced with rage, completely controllable.

Another reflex my face tightened.

"What is it?" she asked, was she shocked? Surprised?

The other part of my mind was annoyed, a juvenile, a child a boy was irritating my mind with
his thoughts.

I can't wait to see Bella. I wonder if she'll be happy to see me. She looked like she was having
a good time at the beach,

His flashing images, his memories surfaced in his and my mind, Bella looking up at him from
her eyelashes, smiling, the sun on her face asking him to tell her.

I wish I was one or two years older… hey! Isn't that their house? No way…is that her Dad's
car or something?

I glanced at Bella "Another complication," I answered.

I opened her door at my normal speed, and moved away from her slowly, as my mind
informed me there was twenty sounds.

"Charlie's around the corner." I said hard, she needed to leave now. I needed to leave now!

Bella jumped out of the car, confusion? On her face. She glanced at me, to the car, then back
at me. Her eyes lingering on my face as I started my car, I hit the gas, I was around the
corner.

I wanted to stay, I wanted listen, but I knew better I would find out Alice would tell me.