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Many more sophisticated discussions about the need for development, its costs, the feeling of confinement and the artificiality of cities,
the juxtaposition of a possible present and past and contemplations about the future could be discussed.
In paragraph one, if the road is a divide, what could it signify is also a divide?
The essay focuses too much on how this is an example of a more successful city and serves as an inspiration for it. Many elements in
the image contradict this notion. It may be one among many but not the only major concerns of the image. Other connections made
are weak and needed to be explained or elaborated upon with evidence.
Needs to consistently be developing insight and point of view
There are insights but they need to be more convincing and more well thought out

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