LOVELY PROFESSIONAL

UNIVERSITY

TERM PAPER OF LEGAL AWARENESS

ON

“DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DIVORCED FAMILIES

AND INTACT FAMILIES”

Submitted To
MRS. RAJ POONAM HEER
Dept. of Law
Lovely Professional University
Phagwara, Punjab, India
Submitted By
IKJOT DHAWAN
B. Tech – ECE (VI Sem.)
Roll No. RB6601A13, Reg. No 3060060048
Department of Electronics and Communication
ikjot_dhawan@yahoo.com
Contact No: 9417666548
PREFACE:

This paper is made to study the various family laws, the grounds of divorce,
consequences of divorce and difference between divorced families and intact families. In
the paper there is the analysis of the factors and the solutions of those factors which are
responsible for the difficulties faced by the children of divorced families. Our research
created the understanding that infant styles create a disposition for later behavioral traits.
More current research has questioned the significance of how the disruption of the
attachment structure as in divorce can affect children's behaviors throughout life. The
research on this topic is contradictory and somewhat inconclusive, with research asserting
that either attachment style or external environment has been the main contributor to the
behaviors seen in members of divorced families, while many sources stated that it is
likely to be a combination of both influences. With either explanation, research concludes
that children of divorced families have a disposition to these behaviors, but the end
development of behavior and personality is in the hands of the individual and the external
factors that are present.

IKJOT DHAWAN
Department of Electronics and Communication
Lovely Professional University
Phagwara, Punjab, India
30 April, 2009

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ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS:

A large number of individuals have contributed in creating this paper DIFFERENCE

BETWEEN DIVORCED FAMILIES AND INTACT FAMILIES. I am thankful to all of them for
their help and encouragement. I express my gratitude to MRS. RAJ POONAM HEER,
Lecturer in Department of Law, Lovely Professional University for their guidance to
proceed towards the paper. My writing in this paper has also been influenced by a
number of popular articles in the field. My special thanks to those who help me to meet
the various persons and those persons who share their views with me. Some of them are:

Rakesh Chaudhary, a divorcee, Ferozepur

Amiti Pathak, a divorcee, Pathankot
Rahul Nayyar, a divorcee, Jalandhar
Vineet Goyal, a divorcee, Dhuri
Rohini Bawa, belongs to divorced family, Noida
Keshav, belongs to divorced family, Amritsar
Rohit Mahajan, belongs to divorced family, Shimla
Madhav Bajaj, belongs to divorced family, Delhi
Chetna, belongs to intact family, Bathinda
Rajan Jhamb, belongs to intact family, Abohar
Babal Khanna, belongs to intact family, Ferozepur
Satwinder Singh, belongs to intact family, Moga
Rajinder Kumar, belongs to intact family, Dasuya
Varun Ansal, belongs to intact family, Mallanwala

I am also very thankful to those who told me to hide their names.

IKJOT DHAWAN
Phagwara

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TABLE OF CONTENTS:
1. BRIEF EXPLANATION OF VARIOUS MARRIAGE ACT 8

2. GROUNDS OF DIVORCE 9
2.1. Adultery 9
2.2. Desertion 9
2.3. Cruelty 10
2.4. Impotency 10
2.5. Chronic Disease 11

3. CONSEQUENCES OF DIVORCE 11
3.1. Economic 11
3.2. Social 11

4. EFFECT OF DIVORCE ON CHILDREN 12

5. THE CAUSE OF DIFFERENCE BETWEEN CHILDREN IN DIVORCED FAMILIES AND

INTACT FAMILIES 13

6. THE AFFECTS OF THESE FACTORS ON CHILDREN OF DIVORCED FAMILIES 14

6.1. Parental loss 14
6.2. Economic loss 15
6.3. Life stress 16
6.4. Parental adjustment 16
6.5. Parental competence 16
6.6. Conflicts between parents 17
6.7. Summary 17

7. WHY DO CHILDREN AND YOUNG ADULTS FORM DIVORCED FAMILIES STILL SEEM
TO BE MORE DISTRESSED THAN CHILDREN FROM INTACT FAMILIES? 17

8. OVERALL CONCLUSION 18

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 9. BIBLIOGRAPHY 20

INTRODUCTION:

The family is traditionally seen as the basic foundation of society. Children tend
to do best when raised within their family. Attachment can be defined as the strong bond
that develops first between parent and child and later in peer and romantic relationships.
Research on divorce and separation of attachment figures has yielded conflicting results.
It is often reported that children of divorce have trouble adapting to different stages of
their lives because of their experience with broken or detached attachment bonds. These
children are said to have no accurate template for successful relationships to replicate in
their lives. Other research boasted results that children of divorce adapt to life's situations
and relationships within normal ranges when compared to their. Taking this into account,
we looked to peer relations, socioeconomic status, general distress, or poor parenting
skills to explain the appearance of troublesome behavior or poor grades. The study of all
aspects of divorce and attachment is important to how parents, psychologists and teachers
approach and understand children of divorced families in order to help them reach their
full potential as adults.

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TYPE OF RESEARCH:

The mode of research for this paper is analytical. To analyze the difference
between divorced families and intact families I met the persons from intact families and
the persons from divorced families. I communicated with those persons verbally and tried
to understand their feelings toward the divorce. I also had some words with the children
and young ones from the divorced families and got their views about the divorce and the
life of a child after the divorce of their parents.

SOURCES:

Primary Sources:

α Book named “Family Laws” written by Paras Diwan.

Secondary Sources:

α http://www.legalserviceindia.com/article/l209-Extra-marital-Relations-and-its-
Impact-on-children.html
α http://www.indiavisitinformation.com/indian-law/Divorce.shtml
α http://www.sethassociates.com/divorce_in_india.php

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HYPOTHESIS:
α Problems:
From the analysis of the views of children we came to know the various causes of
difficulties to the children of divorced families like parental loss, economic loss, life
stress, parental competence and conflicts with parents. Economic loss may trigger
multiple transitions for the child (e.g., moving, changing schools, and taking in other
household members), adversely affecting child well-being. Changing parent-child
relationship, life transitions, and economic strains that accompany divorce present
challenges to children’s well being. Given our cultural emphasis on the sanctimony of
marriage and our cultural disapproval of divorce, many children suffer psychologically
because they perceive that their family experiences are dysfunctional.

α Solutions:

As the solution of the problem mentioned, programs and policies can be

developed to address the factors that ultimately compromise children's well-being during
the divorce process. Parent education programs are designed to increase parents'
understanding of the difficulties that their children may face during the divorce process.
Parents are taught how to manage their conflict, avoid treating children like pawns in
disputes, and to appreciate the importance of maintaining positive relationships with their
children. If programs for parents can intervene and educate divorced parents to the
importance of maintaining positive parenting during stressful transitions, some negative
effects on children may be mitigated. Other possible areas is to include policies and
programs that recognize the economic strain that divorcing parents, and especially the
custodial mother, often face post-divorce, divorce is disruptive for children largely
because the custodial parent faces a significant amount of economic stress in the time
period immediately following the divorce. Another important step toward reducing the
negative effects of divorce on children involves the de-stigmatization of divorce. Need of
social service personnel and officials of the courts could be trained to be supportive of

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divorcing parents and their children as a means to strengthen family relationships and
reduce feelings of stigma.

1. BRIEF EXPLANATION OF VARIOUS MARRIAGE ACT:

India being a cosmopolitan country tolerates personal laws of its citizen. As a

result each citizen of India is entitled to have his own personal laws in the matter of
marriage and divorce. Hindus are governed by Hindu Marriage Act, 1955 which provides
for the conditions of a Hindu Marriage where under the bridegroom should be of 21 years
and bride of 18 years, they both should be Hindus and should not be within the degree of
prohibited relationship or sapindas, neither party should have a spouse living nor any
party should be subject to recurrent attacks of insanity or epilepsy, either of them should
not be suffering from mental disorders or should not be unfit for marriage and procreation
of children and both should be of sound mind and capable of giving valuable consent.
Divorce under the Hindu Marriage Act 1955 can be obtained on the grounds of Adultery,
Cruelty, Desertion for two years, Conversion in religion, Unsound mind, Suffering from
venereal disease and/or Leprosy has renounced the world not heard for 7 years no
resumption of co-habitation for one year after the decree of judicial separation, no
restitution of conjugal rights for one year after decree for restitution of conjugal rights,
Husband guilty of rape, sodomy or bestiality and if after an order of maintenance is
passed under the Hindu Maintenance and Adoptions Act or the Criminal Procedure Code
there has been no cohabitation for one year. As regards the maintenance and adoption of
children, Hindus are governed by The Hindu Adoption and Maintenance Act.

Muslims are governed by their personal laws under which "Nikah" (i.e. marriage)
is a contract and may be permanent or temporary and permits a man 4 wives if he treats
all of them equally. To have a valid "Nikah" under the Muslim Law, presence of a Qazi
(Priest) is not necessary. Merely a proposal in the presence and hearing of two sane males
or one sane male and two sane female adults, all Muslims and acceptance of the said
proposals at the same time constitute a valid Nikah under the Muslim Personal Law. A
husband can divorce his wife without any reasons merely by pronouncing thrice the word
"Talak". However for a Muslim woman to obtain divorce certain conditions are

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necessary. For Parsees there is a Parsee Marriage & Divorce Act, 1939 which governs the
provisions of their marriage and law and for Indian Christian there is a Indian Christian
Marriage Act 1889. Persons of any religion who get married under the Special Marriage
Act, 1954 are governed by the said act. There are certain penal provisions also in the
Criminal Procedure Code providing for the maintenance of the wife and punishment for
bigamy.

2. GROUNDS OF DIVORCE:

In most Western nations, there are approximately 16 distinct reasons for which
divorces are granted. In India, however, only five main reasons are generally accepted as
sufficient grounds for divorce.

2.1. Adultery:

While no formal definition of adultery exists, it does have "a fairly established
meaning in matrimonial law", namely "the voluntary sexual intercourse of a married man
or woman with a person other than the offender's wife or husband". While the law
considers it valid grounds for either sex, adulterous women are "judged more harshly"
than men. The various religious regulations a e not unanimous on this issue. The law
regarding Hindus allows divorce to be granted on the grounds of infidelity of either
husband or wife. The Christian law, however, would traditionally not have granted a
divorce to a woman solely on the grounds of adultery. She would have had to prove
another violation, such as cruelty. A recent Bombay High Court decision "recognized
cruelty and desertion as independent grounds for the dissolution of a Christian marriage,"
striking down a section of the law that allowed for an unconstitutional distinction
between the sexes.

2.2. Desertion:

The three main components of desertion are the "disruption of cohabitation,

absence of just or reasonable cause and their combination throughout three years" before
the abandoned spouse may petition for a divorce. There also must be an obvious intent on

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the part of the offending spouse to remain permanently apart from the other. This statute
also applies to cases in which a spouse has been heard from for at least seven years.

2.3. Cruelty:

As with adultery, "the definition of the type of behavior that constitutes cruelty
varies according to the gender of the petitioner" of the divorce. "Despite the fact that
cruelty is often equally available to husbands and wives, the way in which the law is
interpreted and applied suggests that women and men are evaluated by rather different
standards". This category includes both physical and mental abuse and neglect. A court
decision made in early May 1997 made cruelty sufficient grounds for a Christian woman
to obtain a; previously, the law required both adultery and cruelty to be proven. The
national Indian Christian community seems to have embraced this judgment.

In fig. 1 there are shown some basic grounds for divorce.

Fig. 1 Grounds for the divorce

2.4. Impotency:
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 This refers to the physical inability of the couple to consummate the marriage or
the refusal by one spouse to do so. Some cases have established that sterility can be
construed to mean non-consummation if the other partner is not aware of the condition
before the marriage.

2.5. Chronic Disease:

Both mental and physical illnesses are included in this category, as well as
sexually transmitted diseases. Not all religions recognize identical diseases as grounds for
divorce. Christians and Parsis do not allow divorce for a sexually transmitted disease or
leprosy while the other communities do.

3. CONSEQUENCES OF DIVORCE:
3.1. Economic:

There is great disparity between the economic ramifications of divorce between

men and women. Men remain relatively unaffected while women, especially those with
children, have difficulty "providing food, clothing and shelter for themselves and their
children." The government in urban areas usually provides some form of public
assistance to single mothers, but this service is not fully taken advantage of because most
do not know of its existence. Often a woman is not able to rely on her family for support
because many parents "feel they have discharged their obligations to a daughter by
arranging her marriage and providing a dowry." Dowries are not returned after a divorce.
Also, due to the social stigma of divorce, women find it difficult to remarry and usually
attempt to establish an independent household.

3.2. Social:

While India feels that one should have the right to divorce, it is still a highly
stigmatizing action. Women are looked upon more harshly than men in this regard. There
continue to be segments of Indian society that feel divorce is never an option, regardless
of how abusive or adulterous the husband may be which adds to the greater disapproval
for women. A divorced woman often will return to her family, but may not be

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wholeheartedly welcomed. She puts, especially if she has children, an economic burden
on her family and is often given lowly household tasks to perform. There is also the risk
that a divorced woman's presence would ward off possible marriages for other daughters
within the household. Unavoidably, the overall status of the family and household are
lowered by having a divorcee living with amongst them. A woman's class and caste are a
major factor in her acceptance back into society. Women from higher classes tend to have
an easier time than middle or lower class women in returning to the social order after a
divorce. An exception to this model is the extreme bottom of the society who have
experienced little rebuff from peers after a divorce. This results from their already
atypical status in society.

One of the most frequently asked questions about family life has been, "Is divorce
harmful to children?" Although this may seem like a very important question, I would
suggest that it is time to examine a more important question which is-- "what are the
factors in divorcing families that contribute to children having difficulties?" The
explanation for why children have difficulty and the scientific evidence regarding these
factors is discussed below in the following manner.

4. EFFECT OF DIVORCE ON CHILDREN:

Since there is so much discussion of the effects of divorce on children, I want to

begin by addressing whether there are really any differences between children who live in
divorced families and children who live in intact families. In 1991 Amato and Keith
examined the results of 92 studies involving 13,000 children ranging from preschool to
young adulthood to determine what the overall results indicated. The overall result of this
analysis was that children from divorced families are on "average" somewhat worse off
than children who have lived in intact families. These children have more difficulty in
school, more behavior problems, more negative self-concepts, more problems with peers,
and more trouble getting along with their parents. A more recent update of the findings
indicates that this pattern continues in more recent research.

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 Despite this general finding across many studies, there are important
qualifications of these findings. First, the actual differences between the two groups are
relatively small. In fact, the children in the two types of families are more alike than
different. The analysis of the children reminds us that average differences do not mean
that all children in divorced families are worse off than all children in intact families.
These results mean that as a group, children from divorced families have more problems
than children from intact families.

Another way to examine this issue is illustrated by findings of Mavis

Hetherington (1993). Hetherington, like many others, finds these average differences, but
she also looked at some of her measures and examined the degree to which children in
divorced and intact families had more severe problems. On a measure of behavioral
problems, Hetherington (1993) reports that 90% of adolescent boys and girls in intact
families were within the normal range on problems and 10% had serious problems that
we would generally require some type of professional help. The percentages for divorced
families were 74% of the boys and 66% of the girls in the normal range and 26% of the
boys and 34% of the girls were in the problematic range. Amato (1999) estimates that
about 40% of the adults from divorced families were doing better than the young people
from intact families.

The implications of these findings are two-fold. On the one hand, the majority of
children from divorced families do not have serious problems requiring professional help.
On the other hand, a larger percentage of children from divorced families than intact
families are likely to have serious problems. Another way to say this is that most children
in divorced families do not need help, but more children in this group than in intact
families are likely to need help. This is a complicated message and the media often errs
on the side of one or the other of these two types of findings. Both findings are important.

5. THE CAUSE OF DIFFERENCE BETWEEN CHILDREN IN DIVORCED FAMILIES

AND INTACT FAMILIES:

As I said in the beginning, the general question of differences between children in

different types of families is less important than what causes these differences. Now let’s

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look at what we know about what causes these differences. One way to think about this is
to consider the risks that may cause difficulties for children. There are several types of
risks that may contribute to children's difficulties. These are:

PARENTAL LOSS-- divorce often results in the loss of contact with one parent and with
this loss children also lose the knowledge, skills and resources (emotional, financial, etc.)
of that parent.

ECONOMIC LOSS-- another result of divorce is that children living in single parent
families are less likely to have as many economic resources as children living in intact
families.

MORE LIFE STRESS-- divorce often results in many changes in children's living
situations such as changing schools, child care, homes, etc. Children often also have to
make adjustments to changes in relationships with friends and extended family members.
These changes create a more stressful environment for children.

POOR PARENTAL ADJUSTMENT-- generally how children fare in families is due in

part to the mental health of the parents, this is likely to be true for children in divorced
families as well.

LACK OF PARENTAL COMPETENCE-- much of what happens to children in general

is related to the skill of parents in helping them develop. The competence of parents
following divorce is likely to have considerable influence on how the children are doing.

EXPOSURE TO CONFLICT BETWEEN PARENTS-- conflict is frequently part of

families and may be especially common in families that have undergone divorce. The
degree to which children are exposed to conflict may have substantial effects on
children's well-being.

6. THE AFFECTS OF THESE FACTORS ON CHILDREN OF DIVORCED FAMILIES:

6.1. Parental loss:

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 Mothers and fathers are important resources for children. They provide emotional
support and practical assistance as well as serve as role models for their children.
According to our analysis that on average, nonresidential fathers see their children only 4
times per month following divorce and about 20% of children have no contact with their
fathers 2-3 years after divorce. In contrast, non-residential mothers visit their children
more frequently and are less likely to cease contact.

The amount of contact between the nonresidential father and their children is not
the determining factor; it is the quality of the father-child relationship that matters. There
is a growing body of evidence that illustrate how nonresidential fathers affect their
children. First, when a nonresidential father has frequent contact and there is minimal
conflict, children are faring better; however, when there is conflict, frequent visits are
related to poorer adjustment of children. In a study that looked at results across a broad
range of factors, I found that when fathers helped with homework, set appropriate limits
and expectations and demonstrated warmth, children fared better. In other words, good
parenting by noncustodial parents matters. In short, children benefit from continued
relationships with nonresidential parents.

6.2. Economic loss:

Due to limited economic resources, children in single-parent families may have

more difficulties. Following divorce, custodial parents (mostly mothers) generally have
less income than most two-parent families. There is a common belief that many of the
difficulties experienced by children are the result of the economic difficulties experienced
in these families. The overall evidence is not as strong in support of this hypothesis as
might be expected. Generally, family income is positively associated with children's well-
being, but some studies have not found that income improves children's well-being. It is
important to note the divorced families economic circumstances do not account
completely for the well-being of children. We have statistically controlled for income
differences between intact and divorced families and all of the differences between
children in these two types of families do NOT disappear. In other words, there are still
some other factors affecting children's well-being above and beyond money. One of the

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ways that lower income may impact children is through disruptions that may result from
less money. Many divorced families change residence which may result in changes in
schools, child care, friends, and other supportive relationships. In short, less money often
leads to more disruptions which may lead to more problems for children.

6.3. Life stress:

In general, the accumulation of multiple stressors and changes create difficulties

for children. There are only a few studies that have explored this hypothesis, but the
results seem to support it. Recently, I found that the more often children in single parent
families moved the more likely they were to drop out of school or become pregnant
during the teen years. In general, the more stressful experiences that children encounter
during divorce the more difficulty they will have. There is also evidence that indicates
that children whose parents divorce more than once are worse off than children who only
experience one parental divorce.

6.4. Parental adjustment:

The psychological adjustment of parents is a significant factor in children's well-

being. There have been many studies examining the relationship between divorced
parents' psychological well-being and children's well-being. Of the 5 studies that have
examined this relationship 3 found that there was a positive relationship between the
mental health of parents and children's mental health. That is, children whose parents are
better adjusted fare better than children whose parents are not adjusting well. There is
some evidence to suggest than when the divorced parent's adjustment is taken into
account that some of the differences between children from intact and divorced children
disappears. Despite the general support for these conclusions, there is at least one
important caution. The causal relationship between parents' and children's adjustment is
not clear. It could be that having better adjusted children improves the well-being of the
parents.

6.5. Parental competence:

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 The skills that parents have in dealing with children have a profound influence on
children's well-being. Overall, the evidence indicates that many parents report diminished
parenting practices immediately following divorce which appears to contribute to some
of the problems that children experience. Many studies have also examined the
relationship between child-rearing skills and children's well-being. There is
overwhelming research evidence that indicates that parenting skills and the types of
relationships between parent and child are strong influences on how well children are
doing.

6.6. Conflict between parents:

Another risk that causes children's difficulty is conflict between parents prior to,
during and after the divorce that contributes to lower well-being. There have been a
number of studies examining this issue. Generally, it has been found that children in high
conflict families (either intact or divorced) fare worse than children in low conflict
families. Some studies have found that children in non-confliction single parent families
are doing better than children in confliction two-parent families. There is also evidence
that children begin to have difficulties prior to divorce and that some of these difficulties
are associated with the conflict present prior to divorce. Post-divorce conflict has a strong
influence on children's adjustment. Children in those families that can cooperate and
reduce conflict are faring better.

6.7. Summary:

There are a number of factors that account for why children in divorcing families
may have difficulties—loss of contact with a supportive parent, fewer economic
resources that lead to multiple changes, more stress, poor parental adjustment, lack of
parental competence and conflict between parents. When these risks can be reduced or
overcome, then children will fare better.

7. WHY DO CHILDREN AND YOUNG ADULTS FORM DIVORCED FAMILIES STILL

SEEM TO BE MORE DISTRESSED THAN CHILDREN FROM INTACT FAMILIES?

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 Even though this review has shown that children from divorced families are not
overwhelming worse off psychologically, anyone who has a conversation with a child or
young adult whose parents have divorced will tell you that these young people still seem
to experience considerable distress about the breakup of their families and that these
feelings linger. Some new work with these children indicates that while children may not
be significantly impaired as a result of the divorce, they do carry painful memories. Our
analysis says that young adults in the early 20s who experienced the divorce of their
parents still report pain and distress over their parents’ divorces ten years later. A feeling
of loss about the relationship with their fathers was the most common report. Those
young people who reported high conflict between their parents were even more likely to
have feelings of loss and regret.

There is also some evidence that young adults whose parents divorce feel as if
they had little control over their lives following divorce including the transitions between
households. Less than 20% of children report that both of their parents talked to them
about the impending divorce and only 5% say that their parents tried to explain why the
divorce was occurring and were given a chance to ask questions. Children report more
positive feelings and less painful memories of household transitions when they were
given some chance to voice their ideas about visiting or living arrangements.

These continuing painful memories and feelings of helplessness help us to further

understand the experience of children following divorce and provides some useful ideas
about ways to reduce these painful situations.

8. OVERALL CONCLUSION:

The overall results of these studies suggest that while children from divorced
families may, on average, experience more major psychological and behavioral problems
than children in intact families, there are more similarities than differences. The most
important question is not whether children from divorced families are having difficulties,
but what particular factors cause these differences. Current evidence suggests that the
loss of contact with parents, economic difficulties, stress, parental adjustment and

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competence, and inter parental conflict all contribute at least to some degree to the
difficulties of children. Some new findings shift our attention from major problems to
milder but important long-term painful memories and feelings of helplessness. These
feelings can continue well into young adulthood which reminds us that there are many
things we can do to help children. These results provide significant implications to
practitioners interested in designing interventions for children and adults in divorcing
families.

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BIBLIOGRAPHY:

1. Dr. Diwan, Paras. “Family Law” 8th edition, 2008 Covering personal laws related
to Hindus, Muslims, Christians, Parsis and Jews.
2. Amato, P. R. (2000). "The Consequences of Divorce for Adults and Children."
Journal of Marriage and the Family 62:1269–1287.
3. Amato, P.R., and Booth, A. (1996). “A Prospective Study of Divorce and Parent-
child Relationships.” Journal of Marriage and the Family 58:356-365.
4. Arditti, J. A., and Keith, T. Z. (1993). "Visitation Frequency, Child Support
Payment, and the Father-child Relationship Postdivorce." Journal of Marriage and
the Family 55:699–712.
5. Hetherington, E. M., and Stanley-Hagan, M. (2000). "Diversity among
Stepfamilies." In Handbook of Family Diversity, ed. D. H. Demo, K. R. Allen,
and M. A. Fine. New York: Oxford University Press.
6. Braver, S. L., and O'Connell, D. (1998). Divorced Dads: Shattering the Myths.
New York: Putnam.

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