Losing Your Home and
Rebuilding Your Life After a
Overview
Ways to move forward if
you have been displaced
and lost your home in a
natural disaster.
• Adjusting emotionally to
the loss of your home
• The value of having a set
schedule
• Meeting your physical and
emotional needs as you
rebuild your life
• Getting back on your feet
after a natural disaster
• Let others help. Don’t try to “go it alone” after a natural disaster. Many people and
• Be specific about what you need. If you have many urgent needs, others may not
• Reestablish contact with family and friends as soon as possible. Seek out the people you
Natural Disaster
Most of us have heard the saying, “Home is where the heart is.” But for
many people, those words gain new meaning after a natural disaster or
other traumatic event. A hurricane or other disaster can cost people not
only their homes, but their friends, family, loved ones, beloved pets,
precious belongings, and a physical link to a community.
How can you cope with the emotions that result from facing so many
losses all at once? Having to start over may seem heartbreaking and
overwhelming. This is a normal response to a hurricane or other natural
disaster. But home really is “where the heart is.” A home is more than
physical space. It is a place where you express your deepest feelings and
values. If you keep this in mind, you can take steps to rebuild your life and
create a new home for yourself and any others who live with you.
Adjusting emotionally to the loss of your home
Losing your home in a natural disaster can feel as painful as the death of someone
you love. You may have very strong emotions -- sadness, anger, fear, and
disbelief. You may also have many uncertainties about the future. You may not
know when, if ever, you will be able to return to your home. But it is important
to take steps to rebuild your life even if you don’t have all the answers at this
moment. This will help you create a secure future and avoid dwelling on a
disaster that you have couldn’t prevent.
agencies have information and resources that can help you get settled again. Ask
for and accept support from others who want to provide it -- friends, relatives,
volunteers, and staff members at relief agencies.
realize what you would appreciate most. Let people know if you would like to
have an extra blanket, a religious book, a teddy bear, or crayons and paper for a
child, or an opportunity to make calls to family and friends.
care about most -- your family, friends, and closest co-workers. If your
experience has made you value your ties to them even more, say so. They may
have been having similar thoughts, and the disaster may bring you even closer
together. If you don’t have access to a telephone, see if you can buy an
inexpensive prepaid cell phone card at a convenience store or elsewhere so you
57851-0806
 2 z Losing Your Home and Rebuilding Your Life After a Natural Disaster

can stay in touch as you make the transition to a new home. You can also ask
someone nearby who has a cell phone to call your loved ones and let them know
where you are and how you are doing.

• You may be feeling like you’re on an emotional roller coaster. People’s reactions can
vary tremendously from moment to moment. One minute you may be feeling
OK and the next minute you may be crying. You may find yourself very angry
with the people you love most. You and everyone you come in contact with are
under a lot of stress, so try to be even more tolerant and understanding than
usual.

• Express your emotions in a way that feels comfortable to you. You might talk about
your experiences with one or two close friends, write in a journal or on any kind
of loose paper, or join a support group for other people who’ve been affected by a
natural disaster. Any of these can provide a helpful way to express difficult
feelings brought about by the loss of your home.

• Focus on small, daily tasks. Rebuilding your life is a big undertaking. Break it down
into small tasks that you can “check off” as you complete them. If you try to do
everything at once, you may become exhausted and overwhelmed, or burn out
before you reach your goals.

• Keep things in perspective. During very challenging times, it is common to think in

extreme terms of “always” (it will always be this way) and “never” (it will never
change or get better). But feelings pass over time and can even change from
moment to moment. It is important to focus on the things you’re able to do
something about and try to let go of the things that are beyond your control.

• Spend more time with your children. Children pick up adults’ anxieties and fears
during stressful times. It’s important to have age-appropriate conversations with
your children and clarify any misconceptions that they may be having. Younger
children can express their feelings through playing and drawing. Older children
need an opportunity to speak truthfully with you and have some of their
questions answered. You won’t have a lot of the answers presently, so keep
children informed as you get more and more information.

• Be patient. Don’t expect yourself to just “get over it.” You need time to grieve for
your home and belongings, and the process of mourning is different for
everyone. Don’t compare yourself to anyone, especially those who seem to have
bounced back faster from the disaster than everyone else.

• Consider helping others affected by the disaster if you feel ready to do this. Helping
others can give you a sense of purpose when your life feels like it’s been turned
upside down. And you may be in a unique position to help others who have faced
major losses.

• Remember what really matters -- the people in your life, not the possessions. Your
memories cannot be destroyed by a natural disaster. But you may be having
 3 z Losing Your Home and Rebuilding Your Life After a Natural Disaster

trouble coping with the loss of some irreplaceable items, such as photographs.
Ask family members to make copies of special photos and hold them until you
have a more permanent place to put them.

The value of having a set schedule

Try to reestablish some of your old routines as soon as you can. This will help
you feel more at home in your new surroundings, even if they are temporary.
Although your life may be very unsettled at the present, try to

• go to bed and get up at regular times

• say familiar prayers or engage in other religious activities if this is meaningful for
you

• eat meals with family or friends

• observe holiday rituals and traditions

• celebrate birthdays (especially important for children) and anniversaries

• make “check-in” calls to co-workers and others who are important to you

• read books or listen to music, if available

• make sure that children attend school and help them with their homework

• socialize with others -- play games, watch videos or DVDs together, or go for a
walk in your new surroundings and see what you can discover

Meeting your physical and emotional needs as you rebuild your life
After a disaster, you will have both physical and emotional needs. Taking care of
yourself will help you find the energy you need to rebuild your life.

• Don’t stay in an unsafe home. Many people are reluctant to go to a shelter or feel
that they must stay in their homes to ward off looters. Actually, staying in a home
damaged by a natural disaster can be very dangerous. Your home may have
structural damage you can’t see. If your home is unsafe, go to a disaster center,
hotel or motel, or a friend’s or relative’s home.

• Resume good health habits as soon as possible. In the first few days after a natural
disaster, you may find it difficult to stick to healthy routines. For example, you
may have to eat what is available instead of balanced meals. It’s important to
reestablish the habits that help you stay healthy as soon as you can. Find out
about soup kitchens and food pantries that can help you eat nutritious meals even
if you don’t have access to cooking facilities. Try to sleep at least eight hours a
night. (Consider getting inexpensive earplugs that will help you do this if you are
sharing a home.) Go for a brisk 30-minute walk several times a week if you can’t
get your usual form of exercise.
 4 z Losing Your Home and Rebuilding Your Life After a Natural Disaster

• Honor your spiritual values. These can provide comfort during the difficult task of
rebuilding your life. If you have strong religious values, get in touch with a clergy
member in your faith and explain what has happened. Most major faiths have
disaster-relief programs -- a clergy member may be able to help you get food,
clothing, or shelter more quickly than a relief worker or government official
could.

• Limit your exposure to news coverage. People typically like to have as much
information as possible about what they’re experiencing and what may lie ahead.
However, watching television or reading newspapers constantly can further
increase your anxieties and fears. This is especially true for children. Try to limit
your family’s exposure to news coverage.

• Celebrate birthdays and anniversaries and other special occasions. During this time of
being uprooted, there will be special and personal events occurring. It is very
important for children to feel some semblance of normalcy during this traumatic
time. Acknowledging and celebrating their birthdays and yours, even very simply,
is one small way to help children feel that there is still a sense of order in their
life.

• Maintain a hopeful attitude. Being your family’s and your own “cheerleader”
during these trying times is a way to remember the small victories you’ve
accomplished. People who have confidence in themselves and others have a
heightened ability to think positively and, therefore, recover more quickly. They
are also better able to adapt to the ongoing changes and challenges.

• Find a support network. If a disaster has affected phone lines or other forms of
communication, at first you may not have access to your usual network of family,
friends, and co-workers. But you may be able to develop an informal support
network with other survivors. A few of you might agree to share food, go for
walks together, or keep each other’s spirits up when problems occur. This can
help you feel a sense of community even though your own home community may
no longer exist.

• Seek medical attention if you have a health concern. If you have an urgent health need
and can’t reach your health care provider, go to a hospital or contact the
American Red Cross, which may have doctors on hand. Let people know about
your condition any way you can so you can get the appropriate medicine and
care.

• Get help if you are having trouble coping. Many people experience feelings of
depression or anxiety after a disaster. If you are feeling very sad or worried about
the future, a mental health professional can help you find ways to move forward.
The program that provided this publication can help you find resources,
information, and support. Local and federal relief agencies may also be able to
put you in touch with professional help and other resources.
5 z Losing Your Home and Rebuilding Your Life After a Natural Disaster

Getting back on your feet after a natural disaster

Many people and organizations can help you get back on your feet after a natural
disaster. Local and federal relief agencies may offer shelter, food, transportation,
loans for rebuilding, and legal and crisis counseling.

Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA)

800-621-FEMA (800-621-3362)
www.fema.gov

The American Red Cross

800-HELP-NOW (800-435-7669)
www.redcross.org

The Salvation Army

www.salvationarmyusa.org

Your needs may change as you go through the process of looking for a new home
and rebuilding your life. You may need a different kind of help today than you
needed last week or will need in the future. Keep looking for new sources of
support as your needs change, and continue to tell people what you need from
them.

Remember that human beings are really resilient. People have a remarkable way
of rising to meet a challenge. They are able to be flexible, change, adapt, and
bounce back from all kinds of adversity. By problem solving, focusing on
solutions, communicating with others, and trusting in your ability to cope, you
will be able to get through this time and rebuild your life.

With the help of Marjorie Dyan Hirsch, D.C.S.W., C.E.A.P., C.A.S.A.C., B.C.E.T.S. Ms. Hirsch is an
organizational crisis management specialist, corporate consultant, executive coach, and trainer. She
provided debriefings for the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) during the Oklahoma
City bombing and also for many major corporations after both World Trade Center crises. Ms. Hirsch
is CEO of The Full Spectrum in New York City.

© 2005, 2006 Ceridian Corporation. All rights reserved.

This article is an example of the information offered through Ceridian’s Work Life and EAP Services.
Ceridian is making the article available as a public service. It may be copied and distributed to anyone
affected by a natural disaster. 080106