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Dealing With Negative Emotions

DEALING WITH

NEGATIVE

EMOTIONS

Dealing With Negative Emotions

TABLE OF CONTENTS
Introduction .....................................................................................................................3 Identifying Negative Emotions ..........................................................................................3 Why We Hold On To Pain And Anger ...............................................................................4 Signs of Harboring Negative Emotions .............................................................................7 Emotional Freedom Technique .........................................................................................7 Expecting Too Much ........................................................................................................9 Dealing With Heartache .................................................................................................12 Ways To Overcome Heartbreak & Move On ...................................................................13 Natural Remedies To Help Control Depression And Negative Emotions .........................16 Exercise ....................................................................................................................16 Pranayama (Deep Breathing) ....................................................................................17 Basic Pranayama ................................................................................................18 Tai Chi ......................................................................................................................20 Reiki For Emotional Healing ......................................................................................21 The Importance Of Gratitude .........................................................................................22 Journaling .....................................................................................................................23

Healing takes courage, and we all have courage, even if we have to dig a little to nd it. - Tori Amos

Dealing With Negative Emotions

INTRODUCTION
Emotional pain is a part of life. But the way you perceive those experiences can make all the difference between suffering and acceptance. With acceptance, you can move forward with your life and still appreciate positive experiences, rather than xating on the negative. If youre holding on to painful memories and feelings, these may keep you from leading a happy life. Negative emotions, like fear and heartache, can affect your body and mind, leading to dysfunctional relationships, depression, stress and disease. So its important to be aware of your emotions. This report will show you practical methods for letting go of the past and living the life you deserve. Because youre reading this, youre already showing the courage to make the transition. Go ahead do it youll be glad you did.

IDENTIFYING NEGATIVE EMOTIONS


You may have noticed that anger and fear make your heart beat faster and your neck muscles tense up. Maybe you get goosebumps or your blood pressure rises. These are signs that your bodys telling you to pay attention and protect yourself from these corrosive emotions.

Dealing With Negative Emotions

Constant anger can lead to severe physical symptoms and arguing for a long time can lead to emotional and even physical exhaustion. Bottling up negative emotions can also lead to rashes, nausea, constipation, dry throat, bloating, headaches, difculty with sleep, excessive yawning, undue stress, and more. If you consult a doctor at such times, he may not be able to pinpoint the reason for your uneasiness, but a psychologist could. When you notice these symptoms, try to determine the reason. If youre angry, depressed, or anxious, nd out why. Then, you can do something about it.

A lot of people say they want to get out of pain, and Im sure thats true, but they arent willing to make healing a high priority. They arent willing to look inside to see the source of their pain in order to deal with it. - Lindsay Wagner

WHY WE HOLD ON TO PAIN AND ANGER


Its completely natural to feel angry and hurt if your partner rejects you, but holding on to this feeling for years will make it nearly impossible for you to move into a healthier relationship. In the same way, if youve lost a family member or friend to suicide, or youve acted shamefully, youre likely to feel some amount of guilt. This is normal.

Dealing With Negative Emotions

However, holding this feeling for years is only going to prolong your unhappiness. So what makes us cling to our negative emotions? The events of our life determine the patterns we follow. If, for example, your parents always told you to go to bed when you were naughty as a child, you may connect going to bed with negative feelings. Your brain plays a large part in this process. It assigns an emotion to every piece of incoming sensory information. If your muscles get tense when you argue with someone, theyll probably tend to do so in the future when youre upset. In fact, this bodily signal can alert you to your anger. The trick is to recognize these patterns and their underlying causes. Lets consider the emotion of loneliness and its possible underlying cause. The Negative Contracts We Make In Barbara Ann Brennans bestselling book, Light Emerging, she writes about the negative contracts we make and how these affect various areas of our lives. She gives the example of Gary, a lonely little boy who tries to get the attention of his busy and weary mother by doing things for her or helping her whenever shes feeling down. When he nds his behavior succeeds in getting her to notice him, he repeats this pattern, much like a dog would. He believes that if he doesnt take care

Dealing With Negative Emotions

of his mother, he wont get her love. His childhood experience teaches him that love comes at a price. As a result, when he becomes an adult, his relationships with women are unsuccessful due to his exaggerated care-taking, whether its with a lover, employee or business partner. He nds himself being sucked dry and ends up avoiding relationships. His loneliness upsets him, but he probably doesnt know why his relationships with women dont work. Gary must dig deep to uncover the negative contract hes made with his mother and reverse it. He must be ready for initial difculties before he can ease into the new and positive pattern. The women in his life may not like his new attitude at all. They can no longer count on his unconditional support and affection. Garys new attitude will eventually benet everyone involved. While he will realize he deserves love without the high price of his mental contract, the women will become more independent by looking after their own welfare. Gary may benet from the help of a professional counselor to understand the underlying cause for his unhappiness. Dont hesitate to seek guidance if youre having difculty guring out the causes for your negative emotions.

Man is not disturbed by events, but by the view he takes of them. - Epictetus

Dealing With Negative Emotions

SIGNS OF HARBORING NEGATIVE EMOTIONS


If youre acting in any of the following ways, you may be still in the grip of negative emotions. You may need to forgive someone or yourself for a past mistake. Avoiding family or friends Believing that life doesnt hold good things for you in the future Consuming too much alcohol or other drugs Constantly thinking of a painful event Indulging in addictive behavior Having mental health challenges: anxiety, depression, or other issues Being unable to enjoy the present Hearing people say you have a chip on your shoulder Planning to take revenge or punish someone Having angry outbursts

EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE


This technique, which has become popular recently, is based on the ndings of Dr. Roger Callahan. He discovered that emotional discomfort is caused by an imbalance of energy in the body and mind.

Dealing With Negative Emotions

This insight led to his creation of Thought Field Therapy which combined acupuncture and kinesiology. Thought Field Therapy was then streamlined into the clinically proven Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) by Gary Craig, who trained under Dr. Callahan. The ancient Chinese technique of acupressure was discovered more than ve thousand years ago by the Chinese. They found that by applying pressure with their ngers and hands to specic points on the body, they could relieve pain, alleviate physical symptoms of illness, balance the emotions, and aid in the healthy functioning of internal organs. EFT techniques involve tapping on the acupuncture/acupressure points along meridians (energy pathways) on the body and using afrmations. At the same time, you focus on the issue which needs correction. Do you have symptoms of these constraints? Perhaps EFT can help you! Anger Depression Lack of concentration Addiction Compulsion Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Grief Anxiety

Dealing With Negative Emotions

Give EFT a try and youll feel better in minutes. EFT is painless, has no side effects and youll probably get a quick result which is often permanent. To achieve freedom from emotional disturbances, you dont need to believe in it, either. It actually works on a scientic level. Check out http://www.eftuniverse.com/ for more information, case studies and free videos. Its easy to learn the technique just by watching the videos. Check out http://www.tapping.com/ for a video tutorial.

Every human being is the author of his own health or disease. - The Buddha

EXPECTING TOO MUCH


If you expect too much from yourself or from others, youre bound to feel frustrated. No one is perfect. Accept your reality and the fact that life is unpredictable. Like everyone else, youre likely to make mistakes. If you understand that this is a natural part of life, if things dont work out according to plan, you wont get so upset or give up. Its important to remember that if you depend on others for your happiness, youre likely to be disappointed. Youre responsible for your own joy. When you stop blaming others for your misery, youll experience real joy.

Dealing With Negative Emotions

Youll feel liberated because you no longer harbor negative feelings towards others. One way to be objective is by understanding that your true worth is not determined by your abilities or talent, but by your humanity. Ask yourself the following questions: What am I contributing to the world around me? If your purpose in life is to live only for yourself; if you think that life is short and you want to party all the way and hoard your belongings, you may not be living up to your potential. Am I taking family and friends for granted? Taking others for granted is easy to do. Most of us do this from time to time, at least when it comes to family. We think we can get away with being our worst selves with them because theyll understand and love us unconditionally. However, this attitude is precisely why we see people around us struggling with family relationships. Instead, why not reserve your kindest words and acts for those who mean the most to you in this world? Am I causing emotional or physical hardship for others? Perhaps unwittingly, we cause heartache for others and this can lead to many negative emotions for us as well as those we hurt. Some examples

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

include teenagers who scorn the wise advice of their parents, people who take pride in jilting their lovers, and those who cheat on their spouses. For example, lets look at Mariah: Mariah is a spiritual seeker whos ashamed of her wild past. She took pride in amassing lovers and breaking their hearts. It gave her a sense of power. Her wild ways contributed to her fathers grief, depression, and death from cancer. Today, when she meets her old friends who admired her for her hedonism and devil-may-care attitude, theyre always shocked by the change in her. While they may think shes leading a colorless life, Mariah knows better. Im not proud of my past, she tells them. However, she is making peace with her past and nding serenity from her present in dealing with her negative emotions.

I know not any thing more pleasant, or more instructive, than to compare experience with expectation, or to register from time to time the difference between idea and reality. It is by this kind of observation that we grow daily less liable to be disappointed. - Samuel Johnson

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

DEALING WITH HEARTACHE


A broken relationship can cause many deep and extreme negative emotions. If you, like most people, have been in this situation, you may have wondered how someone so close to you could become a stranger. Maybe you had created your world around this person and now you must begin again. One way to mitigate the feeling of aloneness is to avoid going to the places you used to meet. You might even spend less time with friends you had in common, at least until youve been able to work through the hardest parts of your grief. With attachment comes suffering. Even when you were together, did you sometimes wonder whether it was forever? Maybe you had reason to doubt your partners faithfulness. So take a few deep breaths and become an observer. Watch your reactions. Think of the freedom from anxiety you now enjoy. Your happiness no longer depends on the actions of another person. If you were the one rejected in a past relationship, its easy to delve into thinking youre unattractive or unable to inspire love. Perhaps you even believe youll never nd anyone to love again. If you feel this way, remember that your worth is independent of what someone thinks of you.

What the heart has once owned and had, it shall never lose. - Henry Ward Beecher

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

WAYS TO OVERCOME HEARTBREAK & MOVE ON


Try these strategies to let go of the heartbreak of your past and move forward with your life in positive ways: 1. Write it all down. Write your feelings in a journal or compose your ex a letter youll never send. Writing is cathartic. Getting your experiences out, whether negative or positive, will make you feel lighter. Youll also get a better idea of how to make your next relationship a success. Writing down the details of the experience and your feelings may point out to you what mistakes you can avoid in your next relationship. 2. Look for a pattern in your relationships. Is there a certain type of person you always nd yourself attracted to? Is this the kind of person you truly desire? Many women, for instance, nd themselves attracted to the bad boys. This type of man could have violent or criminal tendencies, or he could be a drug addict or a playboy (or all of the above!) If you tend to nd the bad boys attractive with disastrous results time after time, you may want to discover the reason why and eliminate it from your psyche. Many women nd counseling helpful as they embark on this journey. 3. Clean the house. Get rid of your exs things. As you clean, imagine that youre cleansing your heart of the anger and pain.

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

4. Get back to your hobbies and favorite activities. Maybe you didnt have much time for these while in the relationship, but now you can return to them. Keep yourself busy with things you like to do. You neednt depend on anyone else for your enjoyment. 5. Start an exercise routine. Exercise releases endorphins. These hormones make you happy and regular exercise keeps you healthy and trim. Whether youre not satised with your weight or you just want to get in shape and enjoy those endorphins, joining an exercise program helps you follow through with your desires. Do this in a sensible way, choosing a routine which suits your body and mentality. Consulting a doctor is best before taking on any new tness program. 6. Spend some time with your friends. Talking to them about your breakup may help lighten the heaviness you feel. Ask them about their lives. Shift the focus from you to them. Chat with others online who have suffered heartbreak. For starters, you might try: http://powertochange.com/life/getoverheartache/ 7. Forgive your ex. Or forgive yourself if you were the one to end the relationship for some reason about which youre now uncertain. Forgiveness is essential if you want to move on and cultivate healthy relationships. Its crucial even if you choose to remain single, since resentment and anger are negative emotions that will eat into your slice of happiness. Be thankful for the relationship and grateful for the love you shared. It was necessary for your self-development or you wouldnt have

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

encountered it. Identify the lessons youve learned and take them to heart. This way, youll make the most of your experiences. 8. Find a spiritual path. Use this time alone to focus on your inner self. Most of us are too busy nurturing our physical selves to think of our eternal spiritual selves, but we are spiritual beings in physical bodies. If you can nd the well of joy within, you wont need to look for it outside of yourself. This could be the very best thing you can do to heal the pain and negative emotions. It will also give you a new sense of purpose to understand your true being and manifest it. The eternal soul within you isnt buffeted by extremes if joy and sadness, but watches them come and go like the waves of the ocean. Get in touch with your inner self through prayer and guidance from a teacher or spiritual mentor you admire. 9. Get a pet. Dogs are the ultimate stress busters. When youre aching for a hug, hug your dog. Theyll love you unconditionally and will always welcome you back, even if youve been away for just ve minutes. These strategies can help you eliminate negative emotions from past breakups and enable you to move on to happy, loving relationships. Start by trying the techniques that most resonate with you and then use some of the other methods if you still feel as if youre harboring those old, negative emotions.

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

NATURAL REMEDIES TO HELP CONTROL DEPRESSION AND NEGATIVE EMOTIONS


Exercise Exercise releases endorphins, the happy hormone. In a 2001 study carried out by the Duke University in North Carolina, it was found that exercise is a more effective treatment for depression than antidepressants. With exercise, you develop self esteem and condence because youre trimmer and healthier. But how do you motivate yourself to exercise when youre depressed? Start by doing small things like taking the stairs or walking down the street to the store instead of taking the car. Do some gardening or take the dog out for a walk. Even parking at the far end of the parking lot when you go shopping will give you some exercise. Whenever possible, exercise in natural surroundings, since nature has a soothing effect on the mind. Brisk walking for 30 minutes a day (3-4 times a week) cuts the risk of diabetes by 50 percent. Plus its low impact, so its easy on your joints. Walking keeps osteoporosis and many diseases including Alzheimers and Parkinsons at bay. You could also try other types of aerobic exercise such as tap dancing, swimming, running, or cycling.

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

If you think you cant exercise alone, go to the gym. Sign up for a calming yoga class. Yoga, like Tai Chi, improves your core (lower back and abdominal muscles) which gives you a feeling of balance and stability. The movements require control of both mind and body. These physical and mental abilities translate into emotional balance. Pranayama (Deep Breathing) According to the book, Healing With Love, by Leonard Laskow, M.D., negative emotions seem to reside in the right hemisphere of the brain, while positive ones are focused in the left side. To balance your emotions, you can do alternate nostril breathing or pranayama. According to Laskow, pranayama will cause the consciousness to shift into the transpersonal dimension. Your illusion of separateness will disappear. Normally, the dominance of one brain hemisphere makes us feel alienated from our source. This illusion of separateness eventually leads to illness. He also writes about our emotions and feelings creating energy forms which attract others that are similar. Thus, we draw ourselves to circumstances and individuals that resonate with our emotions. This is how we create our own reality. Its no surprise, then, that pranayama is known to alleviate depression, anxiety disorders and negative emotions. In research conducted by the National Institute of Mental Health and Neuroscience in India, up to 73

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

percent of participants with depression showed signicant improvement through this yogic practice. In addition, the extra oxygen is calming and relaxing and will keep you in good health as well as improve your skin. The term pranayama means life-force control. Its a powerful tool for purifying mind and body and raising your energy level. Basic pranayama is easy to do. The advanced techniques require professional guidance. Basic Pranayama

1. Sit up straight in a chair with a straight back to help support your spine. 2. Use your thumb and middle nger for the exercise. 3. Place your middle nger on one nostril. Inhale to the count of 12 through the other nostril. 4. Pinch the nostril shut with the thumb. Hold the breath for 20 counts. 5. Lift your middle nger from the other nostril and exhale through it to the count of 12. 6. Next, inhale from the nostril through which you exhaled. Pinch it shut with the same nger, hold the breath for 20 counts. Then lift the thumb from the other nostril and exhale to the count of 12.

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

7. Do this 10 times, alternating between the nostrils. 8. Next, using the same ngers and timing counts, inhale through one nostril and exhale through the other 10 times. Repeat with the other nostril 10 times. 9. Next, inhale and exhale through the same nostril 10 times using the same timing counts. Repeat with the other nostril. Note: Avoid doing pranayama under a fan at high speed. The best times for this exercise are early in the morning and at sunset. Can you breathe through one nostril better than the other in this exercise? If its the right, it means your left logical brain is active, if its the left nostril, your right brain is ready for some creativity.

When the breath wanders, the mind also is unsteady. But when the breath is calmed the mind too will be still, and the yogi achieves long life. Therefore, one should learn to control the breath. - Svatmarama, Hatha Yoga Pradipika

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

Tai Chi Invented by a Taoist monk in the 13th century, Tai Chi has gained thousands of admirers in the West. They practice this gentle exercise to reduce stress, improve health, and balance the emotions. The technique consists of slow and continuous bodily movements, preferably done in open spaces, since its based on the Taoist philosophy of being in harmony with nature and going with the universal ow. In China, it is practiced outdoors during sunrise or sunset. Regular practice gradually dissolves blockage of chi energy within the body and between the body and the environment. Effects take a while to show up, but you will eventually see them if you practice just 20 minutes each day. Tai Chi can also rejuvenate the body and keep you youthful. Every part of the body is used and there are no side effects. Research shows that it can prolong the lifespan and calm the mind.

Tai Chi Chuan, the great ultimate, strengthens the weak, raises the sick, invigorates the debilitated, and encourages the timid. - Cheng Man Ching (1947)

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

Reiki For Emotional Healing The practice of Reiki is an ancient healing system used by The Buddha and rediscovered by a Japanese professor, Dr. Usui. This healing modality can help you balance your emotions, sleep better, and resolve physical ailments. For depression, more Reiki is given to the head area, the throat and heart chakras. Once youre initiated and become a channel for cosmic energy, you can make yourself calmer and more peaceful. Being calm is being centered. Thinking and acting from this center, youll be able to avoid extremes. Stress wont have a hold on you. Youll be able to alleviate mood swings, fear, frustration, anger or depression. Or you could seek the help of a professional Reiki healer who can help you recognize and change negative thought patterns. The ve principles of Reiki below will help you transform yourself and lead a contented life: Just for today, I will not fear. Just for today, I will not get angry. Just for today, I will honor my parents, teachers and elders. Just for today, I will earn my living honestly. Just for today I will show gratitude towards everything.

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Dealing With Negative Emotions

THE IMPORTANCE OF GRATITUDE


When youre in an emotional bind, remind yourself of the things in your life that are going well. Begin your day with feelings of gratitude and think of your blessings throughout the day. A blessing could be something as simple as birds singing in your garden at dawn, a loving child, or wonderful pets. This will help you gain perspective. Observe your thoughts and weed out those that are negative, replacing them with empowering ones. With gratitude comes appreciation, which is the key for living honestly and completely in the moment. You will be untroubled by what has gone before and what could come. The perfectly lived moment will give birth to the perfect future moment.

The unthankful heart... discovers no mercies; but let the thankful heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet nds the iron, so it will nd, in every hour, some heavenly blessings! - Henry Ward Beecher

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JOURNALING
Once youve identied your negative emotion, the next step is to express what youre feeling in words. Write it down in your journal. Research shows that writing about your feeling strengthens the immune system by alleviating the emotion. Pay attention to your symptoms and write them down too. Perhaps your body is telling you to stop being self-critical or so easily angered. Maybe its telling you to seek healthier relationships. By reecting on your journal entries, youll discover that youve told yourself exactly what you need to know to turn your negative emotions into a positive force instead.

I guess whatever maturity is there may be there because Ive been keeping a journal forever. In high school my friends would make fun of me - youre doing your man diary again. So I was always trying to translate experience into words. - Anthony Doerr

The many strategies youve found in this report can help you deal positively with your negative emotions. Once youre aware of these emotions and their effect on you, you can take action to discover their source, alleviate them, and replace them with life enhancing emotions that will serve you well the rest of your life. Take the rst step today toward the happiness you deserve!

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Why Is The Number 26 So Significant When It Comes To Success In Life?


A few years ago, NASA conducted an experiment to test the physiological limits of people who were planning to go into outer space. The experiment was designed to uncover the long term effects of disorientation on the mind and body. In the experiment, subjects were given convex glasses that they head to wear 24/7 for several weeks. These glasses made everything appear upside down. The goal was to monitor how these kinds of conditions would impact blood pressure, and other critical physiological functions. During the experiment they discovered something shocking! After a period of about 26 days (on average), each astronaut in the experiment experienced a "flip" in which their brains began translating everything "right side up". Their brains were literally re-wired after 26 days. They went on to determine that this was the average length of time to implement any fundamental change into a human being.

Imagine the amazing possibilities you can create for yourself with just 26 days of commitment to your own personal growth and development?
That is exactly what I want to give you right now. By simply entering your name and email address below, you will get access to 26 consecutive days of powerful personal growth strategies that you can use to literally change your life! That's right, just like the astronauts in the experiment; you can make permanent changes that will amaze everyone in your life INCLUDING YOU. Sign up now and make today the first day of the new

you!