The Red Line by WinndSinger http://www.fanfiction.

net/s/4819806/1/

EPOV

No kid ever stands up on the stage at school and says, I want to be a whore. Back then, I used to say I wanted to be a doctor. My friends would say cop, fireman, soldierthose are nice dreams too. But this is the real worldand dreams just dont come true. I know that now. I am a whore. My name is Edward. There are no last names when youre a whore so I am not a Cullen right now. Its time to punch in for work. Every night I get to be a cop, a fireman, a soldier, Tarzanin a way. I enter from the back door, to this huge establishment called Fire. Its a club for women, there is no mans night, there are no gay clientele allowed in. Thats the one thing Ive never done and at least I have that to cling onto. I am for women only. And that is no small boast. And dont be fooled. Its not only young, beautiful women I see. All ages, young, middle aged, even senior citizens pursued me here. I am always good to all of them. Women are every bit as horny as men, more so, I think, since I came to work here. I figured women would be soft and gentle with me. I figured wrong. Women came here to get drunk and fondle half naked men. It was rare that I found one that stroked me softly instead of grabbed me hard. Their screams deafened me sometimes. I always laugh when I hear someone call women the weaker sex. Wrong. They are powerful, strong, and insatiable. I know. After punching my card, I go down the hall to see where Ill be starting tonight. It is only 5pm, the sun is going down. Twilight. The saddest time of day for me. This is when my day as normal Edward Cullen endsand I become whatever is written in my box on the board. Under my name, I see the black word Vampire. Shit, is it October again?! Emmett sits back in his unfolded metal chair in front of his mirror and smirks at me. Vampire man! Emmett teased, Halloween is coming again! Then he let out his usual vampire hiss as I smiled back at him, walking sideways behind his chair to get to mine, to the left of his area.

I was never one to complain about my assignments, or my job. Thats why Victoria seemed to like me from the start. Oh, Victorias the boss here. The other guys loved to bitch about stupid things but I didnt want to endanger my job here. I needed it. So I did what I was told and shut my mouth. I dont mind being a vampire, I said as I put my duffle bag on the floor by my feet, opening my drawer and taking out my plastic container that said VAMPIRE on it, But the makeup is a bitch to get off. I know. Emmett agreed, At least youre fair enough that you dont have to put it all over your body! I had a nice tan once and had to cover myself with that white crap. I huffed, thanking God for small favors as I took my shirt off, tossing it in the open duffle bag at my feet, not wanting make up to ruin it. I quietly went to work dotting on the white foundation then blended it in until I just looked extremely white. I didnt like to go corny vampire. I tried to make it subtle but still able to see that I was one. I did a little makeup around my eyes and I gave myself a little deep red for my lips to stand out a bit and blotted it so it wouldnt come off when I kissed someone. Then I was ready to put in my eyes. Redor gold? I tilted my head from side to side, deciding tonight to be a good vampire, gold eyes. Maybe later in the month, closer to Halloween, Id be evil then. I hated plastic vampire teeth. Slobbery, too white looking, gross. I had the real thing, porcelain fangs that glued onto my own teeth, the same color as my real teeth. I had even gotten pretty good at talking with these on now. Besides, women loved sweet, sad, innocent vampire Edward more than wicked, demented sexy vampire Edward. Besides, the red contacts hurt my eyes more, for some reason. In a couple minutes, my gold eyes were in and I gave a hiss to my mirror, getting into my role. One thing you have to be good at here, is acting. Another reason Victoria appreciates me is because no matter what happens, no matter how Im feeling, when I step over the red line into the club area where the customers are, I become what Im dressed as. And I never, ever treat any woman badly, or even frown at them. I am theirs and I always look as if Im having the time of my life, always smiling and laughing, always loving whatever they do with me. Women use me thats my job. And I am very good at it. I stood up to go to my closet and take out my costume for the vampire. Yes, every dancer makes or buys their own costumes, nothing is given to us except our assignment. My outfit tonight consisted of black leather bands around my wrists, no shirt, and tight black leather pants that were really more like shorts, with jagged ripped shreds hanging a little down my legs, half my ass exposed. The idea was that I had once been wearing leather pants but they were savagely torn off me, almost. Victoria loved it when I first showed it to her. She had final say in costumes. No shoes or socks, either. And then, of course, my collar. It was a simple black leather collar, covering my entire throat. It had a large silver ring in the middle and it jingled whenever I moved even in the slightest way. I oiled up my body next, which took an incredible amount of time. But this was another rule here. Always oiled, always look shiny and buff at all times.

It was 7:45pm and it was nearly time for me to be taken to my cage. Yes, vampire man works in a cage. He is very dangerous, after all. For the dancer being vampire, Victoria would personally escort him to the cage and have full say over who got inside. The more a woman wants to pay to be in the cage with me for a period of time, the longer she can join me. For the right price, I even would sometimes have my hands bound over my head while they had their way with me. Not sexually, of course. At Fire, theres no prostitution. Well, thats what they tell the police, anyway. The truth is, there is no prostitution out in the open, where customers at their tables can see. And the women are not shy about asking for me privately. I must get about 15-20 offers every night, phone numbers, cards, invitations. And Victoria also escorted the vampire to his cage because she never wanted us to break character in front of the customers. If women were out there, I could never just walk casually over to the cage and let myself in. No, thats not realistic. Victoria would have to put the leash on my collar and drag me to the cage, forcing me in, as she would treat any real vampire. Okay, Victoria, whatever you say. I think she just gets off on it, personally. But she is the boss. I was waiting for her to come and get me, sitting on my countertop and chatting with Emmett as he put the finishing touches on his camouflage soldier costume. Jasper, another dancer, was also a friend of mine. He was to the right of Emmetts station and he would be a cop first tonight. I was drinking my usual cherry icee, which worked to make my lips look even more reddish while I waited for my lady captor. Victoria and I got along pretty well and Ive had much worse bosses. Finally, we could hear womens voices outside, in the club area, and I could see Victoria coming through the dressing room curtains now. I stood up, tossing out my drink and checking my teeth in the mirror. Good, nice and whitefangs secure. Edward? she smiled at me with her twinkling blue eyes as her hair fell in long ringlets past her ivory shoulders. Very beautiful. What man would mind being on a leash with her in control? Victoria! I smiled at her, leaning in and giving her a kiss on the lips. She always kissed all of us. This was perfectly normal. Mmmm. She grinned at me, Cherry. Nice touch. I got my leash from my closet and clipped it onto the silver ring at my neck, handing her the other end. 560 calories in one of those slushies. Emmett reminded, looking up at us, sitting in his chair, You should forbid him to drink those, Vic. Hey she motioned over my body with her hand, As long as he looks like THIS, he can drink any damn thing he wants to, okay?! I laughed, rolling my eyes as Emmett chuckled, eating his usual apple wedges before the first show. Victoria looked at me and asked, Are you going to give me a hard time, Edward?

Dont I always? I smirked, giving her my smoldering eyes as she gave a light tug on my leash. Yes. She smiled more, You are one of my favorite vampires. You always put up a good fight. So do I! Emmett reminded, never wanting to be left out of Victorias love. Yes, so do you, Emmett, I still love you, dont worry. Victoria gave him a nice kiss on the lips now while I waited, shaking my head chuckling at them. Emmett has been here the longest, one of the first dancers to work at Fire a few years ago. I had been here a couple of years now and every time Victoria showed me any affection, Emmett got threatened. Jealous. I teased him, slowly walking after Victoria through the curtains, down a long black hallway. At the end of this hallway was the red line on the floor. This is the line between me and the customers. Once I cross it, I belong to them. One thing I loved about working here is that the club is very dark. I never see myself in a mirror anywhere in the club and I can act as weird as I like and not be humiliated, because I am kind of anonymous in the blackness. There are lights so the women can see me, but to me it feels like being underwater. I become a different person when I cross the red line and Edward Cullen doesnt exist. I feel safe this way. Victoria crossed the red line now and gave me a hard yank on my leash. It begins. I fell to my knees and roared hard, pulling backwards slightly, not giving her that much of a real struggle. But we always made it look good. Come on, you stubborn little PRICK!! she groaned, struggling and dragging me over the red line now, into public view. I am now captured vampire, being dragged to my cage to entertain mortal women. Edward is gone now. RRRRRRRR!!!! I growled, bucking back again, slowly being moved towards tables of women, getting closer to human blood. Dont be afraid, ladies. Ive got him under control. Victoria announced as she brought me closer. Right away I heard screams, giggles, and cat calls. This is our vampire. Victoria had a little microphone on her lapel as she spoke. I lunged away and hissed loudly as the human women as they screamed louder, liking me already, it seemed. Hes being very naughty tonight. Victoria groaned, pulling me harder, And hes going to be punished by all of us, later tonight! Screams, giggles. I crawled reluctantly, struggling a little more. But be careful, he bites. Victoria said with a sexy twang in her voice, getting eager shouts from the customers, Hes very dangerous so we keep him in his little cage over here. I crawled behind her through the tables, and felt a few hands reach out and touch me briefly as I continued my fake struggling. Getting closer to the cage, I made

one last attempt at freedom by roaring, leaping up and grabbing a table where three younger girls were sitting. They all screamed as I growled, showing my teeth and clutching their table, looking right at them as Victoria dragged me away by my hair. Bad BOY!! Victoria threw me into my circular cage, closing the door as I hissed again at her, my face angry and lethal. I lunged forward at her, reaching my arm through the bars and grabbing her dress as she turned, about to start the show. Women were howling at us, laughing and cheering as Victoria turned to me, and using the disconnected leash, she whipped my hand until I retreated into my small little cell, growling in slight pain, holding my arm, licking the hurt area as more women roared. If youre good, later, maybe Ill let you have some friends in there with you. Victoria threatened me with the leash again while I growled defensively now, showing full teeth, How about it, girls, who wants to spend a little time in the cage tonight?! The volume was enough to pop my eardrums out as they all screamed and howled again. Alright, ladies! Victoria went to the main stage now, leaving me in my cage, but that didnt mean I just stood there, bored. I had to keep playing my part as kidnapped vampire. She was announcing the first dancer, Jasper. The room went dark and police sirens blared, red and white lights danced around as if a police car was approaching. Then, you could hear Jaspers voice on a police radio, responding to a call, sounding very official. He was onstage how, in sunglasses and his navy blue police uniform, his baton in hand as he began his routine. I couldnt even watch him right now, I had to play naughty vampire. My cage was elevated on its own little platform, but I was near the right side of the audience, surrounded by tables. I was also to keep the women revved up between dancers so they didnt get bored. I climbed up the poles that made my cage and pretended I was trying to find a way to get out. Tugging on the bars a little, hissing, on my knees, never standing yetstill a slave. I peeked at some women to my left, through the bars, looking innocently at them, tilting my head to the right, as if trying to understand what creatures they were. They were in their 30s, it seemed to me, but attractive. The vampires staring at you. One of them said to the other, nudging her with her elbow. I would have to win the ladies over if I wanted them in my cage tonight. I made big money when they paid to get in my cage with me. The other woman looked me over more closely as I crawled sexily over closer against the bars, purring in my throat. I had learned to do that quiet nicely. Jesus, hes hot. One woman at the table commented as I gave a little hiss in her direction. Awww, you scared him, Nancy, nice!

They all laughed as I gave them a little smile, curling my arms out of the bars and around each other, holding the bars as I pressed my shiny chest against them, turning my head a little to the left, to engage more of them. One woman was very creative there. She was in her 20s, a college girl maybe, and her table was very close to my cage. Offering me a strawberry through the bars, I guessed from her drink, she was trying to tempt me over to her end. I dropped to all fours and crawled over to her, purring again, her friends started laughing and giggling excitedly as I approached. Oh my GOD! the girl with long blonde hair holding the strawberry looked nervous, trembling a little as I got closer. Playing my part very well, I realized a vampire wouldnt eat a strawberry, but, I was here to please my girls. I almost thought of passing up the strawberry and just taking her wrist into my cage and biting it, but it was early in the night, that play would come later and I didnt want to scare the customers away. I inhaled the strawberry, almost timidly at first, like a deer would do, but then I showed her my trust after a minute and opened my mouth fully, taking the strawberry deep into my mouth, and closing my wet lips over her fingertips, licking and sucking, kissing them in appreciation. GOD DAMN IT!! she squealed, His mouth is SO SOFT! Purring, I closed my eyes and let her pet my hair, still on all fours . I think he likes you, Rosalie! her little friend with black, spiky hair laughed. Of course, Im feeding him. She smiled at me, not taking her fingernails out of my hair. I had to admit, it felt very nice. This one was gentle. But, like I said, the night is young. I was sure to be in lots of pain later tonight after these girls got a few drinks in them. Young girls are brutal. He doesnt want that. The black haired one said, taking out stacks of singles, fully prepared. Oh, my girl! Yes, I like this table. Give him this. She said, handing the blonde five singles. At this, I climbed upon the bars, curling my legs in so I was off my feet but my entire body was up against the bars, waiting for her. I held on with my hands at the near top of the cage as she fumbled a little, lifting the hem of my tiny leather bottoms near the side of my hip, and placed the five singles inside. She went to move away but I dropped to my knees and reached through my cage, pulling her back to me by her jacket, giving her a lick up her mouth and then taking her in for a long, closed mouth kiss. If she wanted more than that, she could pay me more. I let her go with a rough shove, knowing younger girls liked this kind of thing. She stood there, speechless for a moment, then turned to her friend and screamed, GIVE ME MORE OF THOSE!

She was grabbing her friends money like an animal. See? It doesnt take long to go from innocent young girl to raging attacker. I also saw a third girl at their table who was just watching, and had an open notebook in front of her. Whats her deal? Is she taking sketches of me or something? I put her out of my mind, staying in character as the blonde gave me a ten dollar bill now, and this time, touched my chest a little as I pinned my body to the bars so she could give me my gift. I growled huskily as she touched me and her little spiky haired friend stood up and joined her, too, giving my ass a firm squeeze before she was through. I let them take as long as they wanted, they were being gentle with me and they were very hot so I enjoyed the moment. Do you talk? the short black haired one asked curiously, smiling up at me. I decided to shake my head no, looking sad. I would talk to them later, when they came to my cage. Awwww. She looked sorry for me. Oh come on, a man who doesnt talk is BEAUTIFUL! a housewife said from her table, her friends all laughing with her. Even I had to smile at that one. They came over to the other side of my cage now and waved their money at me. I hated to leave the college girls table but I couldnt dwell on one table too long. I crawled over to the housewives and took the first ladys bills into my teeth, giving a little growl of pleasure. I leaned up against the bars for them and five pairs of hands were on me instantly, even coming through the bars and grabbing my ass. I was used to it, but it always surprised me, the straight laced looking moms always made me feel like a piece of meat. Nice ass. A couple of them commented to each other as they fondled me, one of them even slid her hand down the back of my pants to feel my bare skin there. I smiled and looked pleased by them, purring in contentment. Forget the ass, I have something better up here. Another was rubbing my crotch without a drop of shame, roughly moving up and down with her palm, I instantly felt myself harden, an involuntary reaction but one that always earned me some extra gifts. WOAH!! they cried and howled at me as I looked down at them with smoldering, deep eyes. God damn, it boy, the woman stroking me said, Heremy husband couldnt do that if he tried! And a $50 bill was placed gratefully in my pants, at the front. Later, after they went, I tucked it down inside safely. After the college girls fed me with their strawberry, I was starting to receive lots of little snacks from other tables. They seemed to love it when I ate from their hands and licked and sucked their fingers. Id have to do this again, it was getting me nice tips. Victoria had come by a couple times during the night, joking with the customers that they were spoiling her vampire and being way too sweet to me. She said I was a bad vampire and needed discipline. Great, thanks Victoria. Now theyd start hitting me.

She told them not to feed me with fruit, but later, when they could come in my cage, they could really feed me. That stoked the fire even more and I had to hand it to Victoria, she knew how to keep these ladies in the mood. Emmett had done his number and got lots of attention from the women, as always. He almost stole some of my girls from me but then when I hung upside down in my cage, using my legs to hold me around the bars, I got their attention again. I held the bars near the bottom with my hands, pretending like I was tied there, my leather cuffs around my wrists making it look like I was bound. I purred and growled and hissed as every woman in the place came up and took her turn stroking me through the bars. In between dance numbers, I was having my back scratched by one older woman with gray hair. I was on all fours, as close as I could get to the bars while she gave me perhaps the best back scratching of my life. I like experience and believe it or not, older women were the kindest, most of them. Never insulting, never too rough, always admiring and appreciative, always generous with tips. You are a sweetheart, arent you? the woman said as I purred, not wanting her to stop. God, I am a sick fuck. She only scratched my back and was now putting a folded one hundred dollar bill near my mouth, not stuffing it down my pants. What a great lady. I took the money into my fanged teeth and bowed my head, letting her stroke my hair and she did, with such a soft touch. Slipping the money away securely while she petted me, I looked up finally and smiled at her, sticking my face through the bars a bit, inviting her to kiss me, parting my lips and giving a little lick to the air with my tongue. She was so cute she blushed and leaned in, giving me a little peck on the lips, then ran off. I liked her and she probably wouldnt come near me again. I turned and looked around, seeing the girl sitting there alone with her notebook, writing as I crawled over nearer to her, trying to see what the hell she was doing. She saw me and jumped, giving a little scream as I hissed back at her, playing my role. Sorry. She said, turning a little pink. It looked like she wanted to say more but she hesitated. I always felt challenged when there was a girl I couldnt get the attention of while dancing or working. This one presented a real test. A notebook she had with her! Maybe one of those smart girls who thinks theyre above all this debauchery. I would get her to abandon that notebook if it took me all night. It was close enough. I decided to take my chances and do it. I reached down and snatched the notebook from under her hand, and yanking it into my cage, getting my back against the other side, as far away from her as possible. She yelled at me and stood up, coming to my cage and reaching inside to try and get me. Hey, thats MINE! she shouted over the music, Please? I need that! Its for school!

I ignored this and opened it, making a face as if I didnt understand the strange marks inside, like a dumb vampire animal. In the darkness, I couldnt see much anyway, except the words VAMPIRE MAN in big letters. She is writing about me. Well if she wants this back, she is going to have to pay dearly. Please, vampire boy? she was talking to me now like I really WAS a dumb animal. Her pretty little friends came back from the ladies room now, wondering what was going on. They looked at me with big smiles as I shoved the little notebook down the front of my shorts, getting a loud reaction from the brunette trying to get me. I reached up over my head to the bars there and began doing pull ups, slowly, pretending to ignore her. Great, now hes working out, sweat all over my notes! she complained as I smiled to myself, still doing it. And youre complaining, why? the little black haired one said. The blonde one just stared at me, smiling in a daze. He is so YUMMY! the blonde one was enjoying my workout. He took my notebook. The brunette informed, I need it back. Well, the short black haired girl went to her purse, taking out more singles, Give him a few dollars and Im sure hell give it back to you, DUH! The little one seemed to think that I would do anything for a few dollars. Wrong. It would take twenties now to get this book back. Now that I saw its worth to the brunette. The brunette waved the singles at me like I was a hungry dog and these were biscuits. Im surprised she didnt make kissing sounds to lure me over. I ignored her, doing some of my stripper pole moves, crawling up the bars upside down, yanking my body back and forth on them, as if thrashing around, trying to get out of my cell, growling in frustration. Its not working, Alice. The brunette complained to her friend. He wants more, then. Alice pointed out correctly, muttering, You know these guys do anything for moneyyou just have to give them the right amount. Then this Alice girl began making kissing sounds, calling me. Here, boy. She called as I hung upside down now, my hands dangling limply as I tilted my head at her. Look, boy140 dollars! she waved a few bills, and I began to slowly come down, falling to my hands and knees again, taking my sweet time to crawl over to the trio. Dont talk to him like a dog, Alice! the blonde one scolded her, Hes a vampire. Be nice to him. Im just trying to get him to give the book back, spare me. Alice frowned a little at her blonde friend.

Now, sometimes a big tip could be snatched away at the last minute, so I soon got wise to that early on in my employment here. I would give her nothing until I had the money safely tucked away. I crawled to the bars, sticking my nose out a bit first, hoping shed put the money in my teeth. She didnt. No, no. she talked to me like I was three years old, Give Bella her book and you can have this. Want to play it that way, huh? Okay, I have a few tricks of my own. I moved back a bit and took the notebook out of my shorts, opening it where the writing was and taking the paper, a few pieces of it, gently into my teeth, not ripping yet, just threatening. NO, DONT! this Bella girl pleaded as I turned my eyes up to hers, waiting with a fiendish smile on my lips. Give it to him, Alice! Bella shouted at her friend. Victory is mine. You are bad! Alice agreed with Victorias warnings and tossed the money inside my cage. I smiled back at them, not wanting any hard feelings and nicely put the closed notebook in my teeth, crawling over and giving it to her. Gently, she took it, and even said, Thank you, vampire, to me. I gave smile and offered my lips to her. Oooh, Bella, he wants to give you a kiss! Rosalie sounded thrilled for her friend, Its SO great, you have to!! Oh, no thanks. She blushed a dark red and I smiled warmly at her now. I gave a grunt of displeasure and knocked my shoulders to the bars, giving her one more chance. Come on, Bella, lets be friends. No hard feelings. But she chickened out, rushing over to her nearby table with her book, making lots more notes now. Victoria came by then and asked the three, Is he behaving himself, girls? They laughed, saying, Oh yes! and Hes VERY GOOD! Only Alice grumbled, No, he IS a bad boy, like you said! I growled at her. I was playing good vampire tonight. I wished theyd come back next week to see me play BAD vampire, that was lots worse and took lots more energy for me. I warned you. Victoria shrugged and turned to me, slamming a bat against the bars. HEY! she yelled at me while I snarled and hissed back at her, away from her side of the cage, You wanna be whipped?! DO YOU?! Oh yea, thats in 30 minutes, isnt it? Damn.

Roar. Take that, Victoria. Behave in there or Ill make you CRY! she threatened, smiling at the women and returning to the main stage to continue the show. Nice, you got him in trouble! Bella scolded the short one as they received their drinks from their male waiter, all shirtless and wearing the white collar with black tuxedo tie, wrist cuffs to match, along with the tight black pants. I was waiting tables later tonight, after my vampire gig was over. Oh, thats all part of the show, relax! Alice informed. This Alice is well acquainted with these places. Ive never seen her here before, though.

LASH!! RRRRRRR!!!! I growled louder, inside my cage, the door open, and my wrists bound over my head in the bars on the ceiling of my cell. It was time to whip the vampire and for $30 each, the customers could give me 5 lashes with the leather whip Victoria had purchased with me one day. This whip was nasty looking, and made a great whipping sound when it made contact, but it didnt hurt much at all. It didnt hurt ME, anyway, and it left no marks. There was a large line waiting to come in here and let me have it. After the punishment of the vampire, after he was whipped into being a good boy, another line would form so that women could come in the cage and join me, the door closing us in alone so I could dance with them. I was the only one who danced, they grabbed. The blonde and Bella with the notebook hated watching me being whipped. They didnt take part in that and every time I was struck and screamed, they got very upset. Even Bella shouted, You are terrible women, hitting something so beautiful!! Maybe Id see her later in the cage. Maybe shed come to comfort me after my beating. Alice, again, told her it was all an act and I wasnt being hurt at all. I wished she would shut up already. She was starting to anger me a little bit. For over an hour, I was whipped into submission. Victoria came into the cage after the line was gone and slammed the door, only her and I in there now. I gave a couple dry sobs, hanging there limply from my wrists as she checked to see if I would be more obedient now. In her microphone, Victoria disciplined me. Are you going to behave now?! she shouted, whipping my back again. LASH! RRRRRRRRRRR!!!! I arched my body up tight, raging out with my roar. Yes or no? she asked, striking again.

LASH. AAAAAAAAAAA!!!! I hollered, clenching my fists and kicking my bare feet. Yes? she grabbed my hair, yanking my head backwards as I closed my eyes. I nodded, broken. I even panted harder, as if in pain. Can I bring humans in here? she asked me, Will you promise not to kill them? I nodded again. LASH. LASH. I screamed out again, in agony. Say it. Victoria demanded, You can talk. He doesnt like to speak to humans, he likes to speak to other vampires through their minds. But I think hes ready to speak now. Say I promise. Growling, I hesitated. All the customers watched and waited. Victoria put the microphone to my face. Ipromise. I used my deepest and smoothest voice, getting a club full of screaming, wild women forming a line outside my cage door. A vampires promise. Victoria said into her microphone, If you can believe that, and youre brave enoughdare to enter the vampires cage. Tell me what you want and I will supervise the vampire. But bewarehe is very naughty and doesnt always obey. I think every woman in the club left their table at that point. All I saw behind me were empty tables. Even Bellas table was empty. I smirked, glad Id be seeing that group in here tonight. They looked fun. Vampire music played overhead, dark, spooky Haunted Mansion type music. Humans began to pay to get into my cell. I was released from my cuffs sometimes, other times they paid to have me restrained so they could touch me, kiss my neck and chest, a few of them even bit my nipples. I was used to this and I smiled and laughed, hissed when something particularly daring would happen. I tried to speak as little as possible to stay in character, but no one seemed to mind that. It was my body they wanted, not my conversation. One woman came in and wanted me tied, hands above me. I just slipped my hands into the little cuffs in the ceiling and pretended I was bound, but could get out anytime. But I never broke the illusion. Anything they did to me was fine. Victoria smiled at me the whole time, loving the way I pleased every single one of them, never showing disgust or reluctance. I wore the big smile, the sexy, aroused eyes for every single one of them. I thought one woman in her 40s would suffocate me. She kissed my lips while I was tied and grabbed my hair, shoving her tongue into my throat, not letting go for a very long time as our tongues wrestled against each other. I tried to kiss her back but her kiss was hard and angry, surely some man had earned her wrath and she was taking it out on me, revenge kissing perhaps.

Victoria almost stepped in to save me but just as I thought Id pass out, her time was up and she let go of me. I panted heavily, getting oxygen at last as Victoria smiled at me. You okay, vampire? she asked me, really concerned. Im fine. I winked, smiling, Wow. What a kisser she was. With a laugh, Victoria went to the next group of girls, taking their money and hearing what they wanted. It was the three girls! The one with the notebook, Bella, I think I heard them call her. I wondered what theyd like me to do with them. No cuffs, vampire. Victoria said to me and I took my hands out of the cuffs, holding the bars at my sides as I took my stance, waiting for them to enter my little domain. Just dancing. Victoria opened the cell door and I smiled. They were nice girls. I began to dance slowly, closing my eyes and moving my hips in little circles, still holding the bars behind me. They were almost afraid to cross inside for a second and I peeked up at them from under my lashes. Come in. I said in soft tones to them, Ive been waiting for you three all night. Girlish giggles danced into my ears as the blonde haired one entered first. Come on. She said to her two friends, grabbing the brunette and dragging her in, the short one trailing in last, nervously. The cage door slammed shut, scaring the crap out of all of them as they screamed, jumping in fright. Welcome. I purred with suave joy as I took the blondes hand into mine, kissing it like a gentleman. H-hi. She stuttered, her eyes roaming over my pecks. Before she knew it, I spun her around and had her back against the bars, and I was leaning against her, moving my hips suggestively against hers. HOLY SHIT!! the blonde screamed below my smile as I pushed my chest against hers, wanting my oil smell on her clothes to take home with her. WHERE ARE YOU GUYS?! the blonde was screaming for help from her friends, but they stood behind us, just watching with open mouths. I ignored her squeals and showed her my vampire teeth, leaning in to find her neck, moving her collar out of the way, and just gently pressing my fake fangs to her flesh, my tongue giving her perfumed skin a wet lick. OHHHH MYY GODDDDDD !!!! she was jelly in my arms now as I grinded into her a little with my leather crotch. Then I felt a small pair of hands groping my ass behind me. Is that the notebook girl? I spun around, hissing at the little spiky haired one. She smiled back at me, liking my vampire play.

God, you are CUTE!! she said to me as I hoisted her up over my shoulder and took her to the other empty side of the cage, giving her butt a couple light smacks and squeezes as she screamed out, laughing. No killing! Victoria smiled, warning me as I worked these girls. Perhaps. I growled, putting little Alice against the bars and placing her legs around my waist while I held the bars at her sides, not letting her down. I buried my face in her blouse as she screamed and held the bars also, for support, helpless to even swat me away. I didnt bite or anything, just stuck my face in for a second, and I gave her a nice little vampire bite, too, as well as some soft kisses along her jaw. I put her down and she scampered off near the blonde one. I looked at the notebook girl and gave a low dangerous growl, my smile sexual and prowling. Oh God.no she backed into the corner, trying to get away from me but I soon caught her, looking down at her, pinning her body against me and the bars as I whispered to her, What do you desire, notebook girl? She giggled at me and her skin was absolutely purple with her blush. Dont be afraid. I purred in my vampire voice, I wont bitemuch. Oh, Bella, let him bite you, its fucking AWESOME! Rosalie laughed. I eased my face into the crook of her neck, breathing hotly there, preparing to bite softly with my pretend fangs. All the women loved to be bitten by the vampire. Wait, no. she changed her mind, Can Ijustkiss you? She looked ashamed to ask me this, as if she was a dirty girl. I actually find innocence here, refreshing and strange. But I loved it. Where would you like it? I leaned over her, giving her my bedroom eyes, pressing my slick hairless chest into her breasts. Um she blushed again, On the lips. My mouth!! she quickly added that last part, afraid Id go for her other lips. I chuckled to myself. An honor. I purred, opening my mouth and planting the softest, wettest, most passionate kiss I could create, wanting her to get her moneys worth. It was not cheap getting into the cage. And all she wanted was a single kiss. I liked this one. Her two friends were howling behind me as I moved my hips into hers while I delivered my kiss. My hands held her face firmly so she couldnt escape me until I was ready to release her. Wow, I actually enjoyed that myself. I stared down at her, kissing a baby kiss on her chin, never taking my eyes off hers as I placed several little loving kisses on her innocent little face. Well, innocent and bright crimson red face. Finally I asked, How was that? She stared up at me, speechless. Her notebook hit the floor with a little slap and I gave her my boyish smile, laughing a little at her reaction. Very innocent. Very cute. Shed make some boy a nice girlfriend. Maybe in a few years Id be the dancer at her bachlorette party.

Alright, enough, YOU! Victoria saw their time was up now and she pushed me back against the bars with her bat. I pretended she was actually holding me there with it, even though she wasnt really. Goodnight, ladies. I cooed to them as they slowly filed out. The notebook one was the last to leave, her eyes fixed on me. I smiled at her again and said, Goodnight, notebook girl. She blushed again, getting her book from the floor and leaving me to the 200 women who were next in line. Cuffs, vampire! Victoria announced the next couple women as I smiled and slipped my hands into the cuffs overhead, waiting. BPOV Oh my God, that was without a doubt the best damn kiss I have ever had in my life. I dont even remember walking from the cage to our table again but I must have because now Im sitting here, staring at my watery Sex on the Beach. Jesus Christ, he is amazing! Rosalie gushed as she took her seat again, still watching the vampire as two women were in there with him now, feeling up his legs and grabbing his ass cheeks, taking a long time to explore every muscle there while his hands were helplessly up over his head. Ukkk I hated watching what those women were doing to him, Some women are such pigs, I swear. Look at them! Oh God, shes sucking his nipple and squeezing the other one! Now shes BITING it! Ill bet she paid $500 to get to do that to him. Alice commented, watching with a sleepy smile. I looked at his face, the vampire guys, and thought Id see disgust or humiliation there, but he was enjoying it, eyes closed peacefully, moaning and groaning in pleasure! Then he smiled and kissed their lips, just like hed kissed mine! Part of me felt stupid. This was all an act for him. He was that way with every single woman here. I thought our moment was kind ofspecial. It was for me, anyway. But how could it mean anything for him? Hes being ravaged and kissed like this by every woman here. I opened my notebook and made these observations in writing when Alice leaned in. So, are you going to ask HIM? Alice smiled at vampire guy. He is perfect for it. I answered, He already baffles ME. He is my favorite of all the guys weve seen here. The best looking, thats for sure. And he looks nice, personality wise. I wish I knew his name so I could do a background check on him. Well, after hes done being raped, you can maybe ask that Victoria woman with the microphone something about him. Maybe you can talk to him backstage or something. Rosalie suggested, Its not like hes a rock star, you CAN speak to him, you know.

Oh Jesus. I peeked over at him and three girls in their mid-20s, scantily clad, revealing lots of skin and total sluts were surrounding him, roughly rubbing him all over and kissing his back, his chest, one girl had a tight grip on his hair and was savagely attacking his neck. One of them even stuck her face into his crotch! And still, he seemed to be loving it, loving every single thing they all did to him. He was definitely someone I could do a great paper on. I knew there was more there than just the body and face. I wanted to get into his head and know what made him do this for a living, what was going on in his mind while these women molested him this way. He wore a smile but I knew better. I wanted to get to the bottom of this vampire man. And in that moment, I chose him to be the subject of my thesis. All I had to do now wasconvince him to talk to me. See next chapter soon! Love WinndSinger PS Dont be put off by the way Edward is acting, there are reasons and youll see in later chapters as Bella unravels the mystery of Edward Cullen. Hope you like this so far! Leave me reviews they are my minutes in the vampire cage with Edward!

2. Buying a Vampire

BPOV I had already downed three more Sex on the Beaches before I caught sight of the vampire again. He had been dragged away after his two hours pleasuring the women lined up at his cage and an hour has passed since we spotted him again. I realized he probably needed and deserved a nice long break after his long night in that tiny cage, but I was losing my nerve the longer I waited for him. What would I say to him? Oh, hi, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out with me for a few weeks so I can ask you all about your life and see why youre so damaged. No, not cool. I didnt want to make it sound like I was putting him down or calling him crazy or unbalanced, but I didnt want to come off like some nympho either. Rosalie was the one to spot him in the dark as he made his way gracefully through the tables, now wearing the waiter costume, the tux collar and matching wrist cuffs, no shirt on, which was justvisually beautiful. And those tight black pantswow. I have to stop drooling over this guy, I am here for educational reasons. Yea, right. Part of me had to admit I found this place and this whole world very fascinating and forbidden. My dad is the chief of police in our hometown of Forks, where he still lives, and he would loathe me being in a place like this, forget inviting this vampire guy to my place and having conversations with him. I could never tell him any of this.

But this is New York and on the other side of the world. Daddy would never find out. So I had to shove him out of my mind now and do what I had to do. Oh, hes very handsome, too, without the vampire makeup on. Rosalie said with a dreamy voice, and was in love with him already, it was obvious to me. He was at the bar, laughing with the girl bartender there, taking a look around the place as the music played and three other dancers were coming around, table to table to give dances to women while they shook their money in the air. These other guys were handsome, too, but the vampire one was a bit more special somehow, to me, he had something extra. I couldnt put my finger on it, but I couldnt take my eyes off him. His face wasnt so pale anymore but it was still very fair in comparison to his copperish-brown hair and dark, full lips. My legs actually started to shake, just watching him walking around the tables, normally, out of the cage now and without his collar on. He moved like smoke, swooping and turning with ease and fluidly, like hot water. He took the large tray of drinks and said goodbye to the pretty blonde bartender, getting to work and delivering the drinks to a table about 15 feet away from ours. I wanted to hear him talk again, to see him interact with the women out of the cage, not as a vampire who couldnt speak, but as himself. I think all three of us were stunned into silence because none of us were talking, we were just staring with our bottom lips on the table, gawking at a god serving drinks to the older women. GIRLS! the vampire man shouted out happily to the girls who were at least 50 years old plus at that table. I smiled, seeing he was already making them feel like girls again the instant he found them. They all brightened up, magically, and giggled like teenagers. Oh, there he is!! the voices shouted as he began handing the correct drinks to the women, The vampire boy !! We LOVE you!! You are SO handsome!! the voices and compliments overlapped each other. AMAZING!! another one of them yelled to him. He smiled like a boy, flattered, his white teeth now without fangs but as white as the snow. Flawless. Thank you, ladies. He was gracious and looked a bit shy as he placed their drinks down and then one of the women next to him asked something I couldnt make out. All the women screamed as his face laughed and he put the tray down, laying on his back right across their table in the center of all of them. OH SHIT!! all of us three yelled at the same time, our tongues hanging out. They dived on him as if he were their last meal. I even stood up to see better but he WAS laying on the table, his arms up, one of the women holding his wrists down as ten others at their table were kissing his mouth, taking turns. I walked up to get a closer look, not even realizing I was doing it, and watched as he gave a little squeal of delight, two of the women were taking ice cubes out of their glasses and circling them around his bare nipples, licking and biting them after a good frost set in. I saw hands all over his body, even rubbing up and down his crotch through his tight pants. He just moaned and kissed them all back, letting

another woman stand between his open legs, moving her hips against him, both their clothes still on. I wanted to save him, it looked so terrible how they all groped and abused him in so many ways. I looked around and noticed their were no bouncers or security guys to help the vampire man. But then, he didnt look like he needed any help. He was smiling and laughing, biting his bottom lip as he peeked down and felt the ice cubes now moving over his six pack abs. I love it here at this table. He purred, opening his lips as another woman dived upon him, smothering his mouth as he moaned again. Yesyesssss. He groaned as he made a SSSSSSSSSSSS sound, enduring the ice again as another woman at the table fed him a pineapple wedge from her drink, wetting his bottom lip with it first before placing it into his soft lips. She had teased him with it, pulling it away as he tried to lick it. Then she let him eat it. Thank you, beautiful. He purred as he chewed the pineapple, swallowing it quickly, getting a chorus of giggles from the women. Oh my Goddddd he moaned as a woman pinched his nipples and bit down into each one, Damn, girlsyou are turning me on he laughed with them. He sounded totally into everything they did to him. He looked so delicious there, helplessly giving himself to these women and letting them do as they pleased with him. And he never looked uncomfortable or ill at ease. I rushed back to our table, more afraid now to approach him. But more intrigued by him as a subject. Yea, hello. I knew why I was intrigued and it had nothing to do with school or psychiatry. Deep inside me, I wanted him to lay across our table but now it would just seem like copying from someone else. Roll him over! one of the women at the table yelled as they partied and screamed, going WOOOOO!!! I looked again, seeing they actually DID roll him onto his stomach and were kissing and touching his muscled back, scratching him as he laid there willingly, even though they pinned his hands behind him, placing weight on them so he couldnt get away. Bad vampire! another one of them yelled and began spanking his ass with the round tray he was holding. I listened to see if he was struggling or hurting, but he was laughing when I caught his expression, biting his bottom lip occasionally if he received a particularly hard swat on the butt. Then I heard him saying, Thank you, may I have another? That made them all go wild and then they were really letting him have it. I flinched just watching the whacks they were taking at him, but he never made an unpleasant sound or face. One lady actually asked him, looking at his face, if they were hurting him and he winked at her, smiling and said, No, I love it when you hurt me, baby.

He wasnt born, he was sculpted and brought to life! Alice shook her head, How can he let them do all that to him? Id be so. I know. I breathed, amazed and unable to look away. Victoria came around to the table after 20 minutes and jokingly said, Hey, whatre you guys doing to my waiter? Hes serving us. One lady laughed, the others howling and laughing too. Victoria yanked the vampire man up by his hair and twisted it, making him wince, closing his eyes tight. Laying down on the job, Edward? she asked, giving the women a little more show before she freed him. No, Boss. He breathed. Get back to work, bitch. She sneered, letting him go, smiling at the women as she left the drunk, cheering crowd. Sorry, girls. He ran a hand through his wild unkempt hair, bending down and picking up his tray as each woman came to him and stuffed large bills into his pants. In 20 minutes, he had bills sticking out of his pants all the way around, from that table alone. No, youre too good to me. No He was being modest as they lavished him with large tips, Thank you, girls, this is now my favorite table. Ill be back later when I lose the Boss Lady. Enjoy your drinks! He left smiling, beaming. I waited to see if the happy face changed once he was away from them, but it didnt. Maybe he was a robot. I just couldnt read him. And I was good at this, damn it. But he was better. Bye, gorgeous!, Later, sexy!, and Hurry back, Vampire! were some assorted goodbyes they called out after him. They were very satisfied when he left them and one woman grabbed a quick kiss from his lips before he moved quickly back to the bar to get another order. Lets order some more drinks. Rosalie said, That will get him over here and you can talk to him. Talk, shit, I want him laying across OUR table! Alice growled, hungrily. She raised her fingers up as I lost all nerve instantly. I cant ask him about this at the table now! I hissed, seeing him place some drinks down at another table nearby. He smiled at the women there, giving a nod to one of them, but then saw Rosalie raise her hand. Pardon me, ladies. He flashed that perfect grin at them, walking over to us. Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God I whimpered, opening my notebook again, so terrified suddenly to look into his eyes. Hello girls. He had a seductive voice now, his hands behind him, raising a brow, What can I do for you? It sounded like he was not only asking if we wanted new drinks.

Hi. Rosalie beamed, not saying anything more, her eyes fixed on him. He laughed and it was so musical. Hi, he greeted right back at her, leaning in, saying, I must tell you, you are three of the most beautiful women here tonight. My eyes keep coming back to you. Rosalie and Alice giggled like 15 year old girls, and Rosalie took out a twenty dollar bill and handed it right over to him. He looked confused but still happy. Is this for a drinkor? Its yours. Rosalie breathed. I had a feeling if he wanted, shed hand her Visa card over to him next. Thank you very much. He grinned, slipping it into his pocket, How are your drinks? Anyone thirsty? Alice spoke up. Rosalie was out, in la la land. We really loved your vampire thing, there. Alice motioned to the cage, Ive never seen anything like that before. It was hot! Thanks. He smiled another crooked smile, wow, I loved that smile! So boyishly cute! It was clear to me now that he was a bit out of practice at talking at length to women, I guessed he wasnt used to doing a lot of talking at this job. I wanted to say, Can you lay on our table now? but I would die a second after it escaped my lips. Can I have a coke? I blurted out. He looked at me and grinned, giving a nod, not taking any notes on this, then he looked to Alice and Rosalie, And for you, girls? Can I have you? Rosalie asked, making him laugh. She quickly realized her blunder and looked horrified, correcting it loudly, I mean, can I have an apple martini? Rosalie looked like she wanted to crawl into a hole and die. I blushed for her embarrassment, glad it wasnt me that screwed up. Alice giggled, ordering an Alabama Slammer. Thats all? he asked, patiently waiting. Yes. I grinned, then the vampire man leaned down again by Rosalie, whispering something to her. He walked to the bar and Rosalies mouth hung open. Alice and I both pounced on her at once. What did he SAY?! we demanded. He said I could have him any time, any place. She almost started jumping up and down in her chair. I never saw Rosalie this way. She was usually so cool around guys on campus. Maybe it was just this man doing this to her. I hate you! Alice was jealous as I took more notes on this effect he was having on my friends.

Shhh, hes coming back. I shut them up as he glided back over to our table. Alright, goddesses, he purred when he got back, giving us all the correct drinks, Coke, Alabama Slammer, and an apple martini. And I had her put extra sugar around this one for you. He ran his finger along the edge of her martini glass, covering it with white powder and put it to Rosalies lips, Taste. He smirked at her. Alice and I almost opened our own mouths when Rosalie opened hers, taking his fingertip gingerly into her lips, getting his smile as she tasted his finger, licking the sugar off slowly. She held his hand with both of hers, half closing her eyes. Damn. I hate Rosalie too. Bitch. God, now I am jealous. I will have to make a note of that, too. Is it sweet enough? his voice dripped with seduction. Yes. Her voice squeaked like Elmos from Sesame Street. Alice and I tried to hold in our guffaws until the Adonis left the table. Perfect. His thumb stroked her cheek as he turned to us, asking, Is there anything else you desire? God, I love you. No thank you. I hardly got the words out. Alice couldnt even speak. Well, you know where to find me if you change your minds. He smiled, giving a little nod and gliding away, over to some other lucky table. Rosalie watched him go as if he was her husband leaving for war. She had tears in her eyes ! Alice and I let out our laughter, not trying to hold it in anymore as she looked at us, her eyes wide with wonder. What is so funny? she asked. God, he sucked you right in! I shook my head, secretly totally jealous of the attention he showed her, Twenty bucks to lick his finger! I have always been plain and next to Rosalie, I was almost invisible. It never bothered me much until now. I wish I was the kind of woman he would take notice of like that. I always wished I was sexy and someone all the guys would drool over when I walked into a room. But I justwasnt. He wants you, Rosalie! Alice bounced, What are you gonna do? What? she looked out of it. Uh, nothing! I cut in, looking at Alice, Shes not going to sleep with a male stripper, Alice! He probably does it with 100 women a week! I tried to keep my voice down. Who cares? Alice asked, These guys are very clean, theyre tested for AIDS like, every week too!

Alright, stop. I cut them both off, This is ridiculous, dont even think about it. Lets just have fun and help me figure out how Im going to approach this guy about letting me interview him. Youre too scared to even LOOK at him! Rosalie informed me. He does scare the shit out of me. Why? Just because Im not sucking sugar off his fingers doesnt mean Im too scared to talk to him! I spat back, my jealousy showing now. It was so sweet and delicious. Rosalie smirked at me, rubbing it in, taking a sip of her drink happily, And Im not talking about the sugar, either. We stared at him while he served drinks for a couple more hours. It also astonished me that he had plenty of time to flirt and play with the women and serve everyone drinks in a fast, efficient manor. But I doubted any woman here would ever complain about him being late with their drink. Alice and Rosalie helped me work up the nerve to go talk to him but something always happened that scared me off. It was 1 am by the time Alice was finally fed up with me and my cowardice. Thats it Alice jumped up, as I watched her go right up to Victoria, the woman who owned the club. I was horrified as they spoke for about ten minutes, not able to hear a thing over the music. She finally came back over and had a huge grin on her face. What the hell did you do? I yelled. I set it all up for you. Alice informed, Private rooms are in the back. You have 30 minutes alone with him and according to Victoria, you can do whatever you want, but if he wants extra for something kinky, you have to pay him more. Oh GOD ALICE! I spun around, peeking at him as he was standing at a far away table, laughing and talking to the women there. He was certainly the charmer, thats for sure. Everybody loved him. And why wouldnt they? Look at him, JESUS! I saw Victoria slowly making her way over to him and I almost died, he was going into a private roomwith me? For what? What would I say ? Or do?! I want to kill you Alice. I was shaking with terror as I glanced over and saw Victoria talking to the vampire man. SHIT!! My blood was racing and my heart beat was thumping like a rabbits. Alice and Rosalie were talking and laughing as Alice spun around to me suddenly and almost screamed, Hes coming over here!! You bitch, I could crush your head for this! Why was I so scared and upset? Hmmmthis place was full of hidden mysteriesthe more I sat here the more I wanted to study all these strange things and feelings. I looked to see where he was and suddenly a deep velvety voice was behind me. Like, RIGHT behind me, in my EAR!!

Bella, would you please follow me? his voice made my legs convulse uncontrollably. It was a low, sexy voice full of want and desire. And how did he know my name? ALICE !! I looked at my friends and almost said no to him but they waved me away, and I knew it was now or never. I decided to be brave and go for it. I wanted this guy to be the subject of my paper. The worst he could say was no. God, Im so scared!! I feel like I have to go to the bathroom suddenly. I peeked around, seeing his warm, affectionate smile floating above me, but his face so close to mine that I could smell his sweet cherry breath and his arousing cologne. I cleared my throat as he straightened and made my little voice say, Yes. He smiled at me more and pulled my chair out for me, extending his hand to me. I shivered and placed my little plain hand into his large, soft one and he slowly led me away from the tables. I glanced at my friends one last time and they were on their feet, clapping and leaping up and down for me. Jerks. I wished I could say something to him before we got to wherever he was taking me but the music was so loud. All I could see was his porcelain back and the back of his hair that also was perfectly messy in a just out of bed sexy way. I just know hes going to do something sexual to me as soon as we get to that room. I had to stop him if it began. I just wanted to talk to him, notDO him. He is probably sick to his stomach that he has to do anything with ME anyway, I told myself. I forgot my notebook. Oh, screw that. How dumb would you look taking your notebook to a private room with this guy? The walk to this room seemed to last a year. He was not rushing me or making me feel as if he was squeezing me in and I liked that. This guy was very smooth and skilled at this job, I knew that already. But there is more to him than his job and thats what I wanted to see more of. His hand was so smooth and firm around mine that I felt my palm starting to sweat and become moist. Oh no, not now. We had left the tables far behind and went around a curved bend, the noise faded away fast and we were in a red hallway. It was very dimly lit here, but warmer than the club area, relaxing and romantic. Each door had a word on it, scrawled in a flame-like font. Fantasy was on one door, Lust on another, Passion on the next door. I wondered which one we would end up in. Maybe theres a door that says Dork on it that hes taking me to. God, this is such a mistake. How can I get out of this now? Charlie would murder me ! And Vampire man!! Hunger. Ache. Thirst. More names on doors we passed by. We stopped finally and I realized it was now quiet enough to talk to him but my voice was totally gone. We were at a door that said Awaken on it and I thought Id fall over right there.

He turned to me and opened the door and it was so dark that I couldnt see his face for a moment. Come in, Bella. His voice was so soft it was like a lovers whod known me for years. My breath gasped out all of a sudden as a small red light went on. The room was very warm and silent, the faint sound of the club music playing in the distance. There was a gigantic black sofa and chair inside, and a fireplace held a live, crackling fire inside it. I followed him in, my legs not very functional and I almost fell down, landing on him as we stepped inside. He caught me in his arms and gave a little chuckle, smiling at me so sweetly, as if he really liked me. Are you all right, Bella? his eyes sparkled and I noticed how green they were in the firelight, without the vampire contacts he had in before. Yes. I shivered, Im clumsy, not drunk, dont worry. Your eyes are so green I sounded like a moron. I meanthey are very pretty. I added, and that didnt make it any better for me. He smiled and said, Well, thank you, Bella. I dont get many compliments on my eyes around here. I appreciate that. We were in this red room now and the carpeting was so thick and soft my feet bounced off it. He began to take my hand again and I gave it to him. Leading me over to the couch, he moved slow and carefully, sensing my terror. Wait! I froze as he turned to me silently. Whats your name? I asked, shaking, Am I allowed to ask that? Sure. He smiled, Im Edward. I like that name. I said honestly, it didnt sound like some porn name or anything, and I added, It suits you. I like your name too, Bella. He slowly moved over to me where I was rigidly standing, You dont have to be afraid of me, you know. I wont hurt you. I will only do what you want me to do. I breathed out, realizing this was the perfect time to ask him about being the subject of my paper. But my brain was being held hostage by my hormones. They didnt want to talk. They wanted to see what Edward was going to do to us. His hands were so soft and gentleit surprised me. They danced up my arms and touched my neck, finally cupping my face and tilting it up a bit as his forehead rested on mine. I know you like to be kissed he whispered, remembering it from the cage, and in seconds his lips touched mine so innocently, briefly that I wanted more. He waited for me to kiss him the second time and I did, drawn into those lips that made me fall in love with him in the cage earlier. I had no idea what to do with my hands. They hung at my sides like two dead fish. I am so bad at this crap. No wonder I dont have a boyfriend.

His kissing was so perfect he mustve studied the art for years! In mere moments, we were tongue kissing so hard I began to feel burns on mine. But who cares? Finally, after what seemed like hours, he whispered to me, Bella, you are such a great kisser. I am? Yea, okay. Alice mustve paid big bucks for this. Come here. He led me to the chair, removing his wrist cuffs and the tuxedo collar, tossing them to the floor, Sit down. He offered in a non demanding way. I sat, grateful to be off my shaky feet. The chair was so big and comfortable that I was almost laying back in it. I guessed this was the whole point because Edward parted my legs gently, getting down on his knees before me and moving in closer, kissing my lips again, his fingers in my hair. I moaned out loud, unable to keep it in any longer. I wasnt sure how I got here, or what was happening, but I would be damned if I was going to talk about a thesis or a class now. I am 20 years old and I have never been touched or kissed this way in my life. And Id certainly never see a man this dazzling again. I am seeing where this goes before I bail out. Do you like my kiss, Bella? he whispered to me, so eager to make me happy. God, he is good at this. Before I could answer, his mouth was roughly kissing my neck and I let out a groan of ecstasy immediately. I was on fire as he kissed my neck this way, pressing his bare chest into my small breasts. God I want him.so bad. But this is so wrong. Ye-s. I heard myself answer his question, telling the complete truth. If I do anything that you dont like he kept kissing across my throat, his hands moving down my arms, Just say stop. And I will. I am yours now. Ill do whatever you say. God, I love you Alice. I wondered again how much this 30 minutes was costing her. This was probably the equivalent of 10 Christmas gifts. I let out a few gasps as he slowly began to unbutton my blouse, he peeked up at me, asking permission with his eyes. What do I say? I grabbed the cushiony arms of the chair and dug my nails in, almost laying all the way back. No, love, relax he smiled warmly, taking my claws out of the chair and kissing each hand, he gently moved them so they were laying up over my head, trembling but less tense now. Thats my girl he almost sang the words, Let me please you, Bella. Dont be afraid. I closed my eyes and felt his fingers back on the buttons of my shirt, slowly opening more and more of it, placing a soft kiss on the skin each opened button

revealed. I was panting like I just ran a race but he didnt embarrass me by saying anything about it. Finally, my blouse was open and my little white lace bra was staring him in the face. I bit my bottom lip, nervous about what he was thinking. Woah, wait ! I jumped up, almost knocking him over as I pushed past him, trying to close up my blouse, buttoning into the wrong holes Im sure. Moving around before me, he stayed on the floor, looking up at me in real concern. Did I do something wrong, Bella? he asked quietly. No. I cringed, I did. Im sorry, Edward. Its not you. You are perfectand hotand sweetI really didnt want this Edward raised a brow at me and I took a good look at his body. Okay, I do want this I corrected, But I really wanted to talk to you and Alice set this up. Im so sorry. He gave a little smile. Thats alright. We can talk if thats what you prefer. Im a very good talker. God, hes awesome. I cant believe I passed up sex with him. I am a fucking idiot. Come here. He patted the floor, I can give you a nice massage while were talking. How would that be? Hmmm. Not a bad idea. I am really tense. Ummm I held my shirt closed with both hands, Okay. Good. Edward brightened, his finger curling me towards him on the floor. Mommy. I got down on the soft floor and he positioned me so I was laying face down to the floor. He straddled his legs over my butt, not putting any of his weight on me, as asked, Would you care to lose the shirt, Bella? Oh, okay. I unbuttoned it and he slipped it off me. I grabbed it and held it over my bra, shaking. He didnt push me to take the bra off and I was glad about that. His fingers began to move across my back like a skilled masseuses. My rigid body was fast starting to relax as he worked my shoulders first. I didnt object when his fingers slowly moved my bra straps off my shoulders. So, Bellawhat topic would you care to discuss? Edward began the conversation. Maybe I could ease into this. Make some small talk first. My friends and I I began, are having a really great time here. We all like you the best. Ugh. I want to die. Well, thank you, Bella. He sounded truly appreciative, I think I like you three best, too.

Yea, Im sure he tells every woman here that same thing. Youre quiet, his voice melted like hot honey, sweet, and gentle. You were the few women tonight who didnt hurt me in the cage. My heart stung a little from this revelation and I heard myself say, I saw how they were treating you in there. It must be so hard to endure that. I felt like ripping them out of there and His hands were dazzling my body as he traveled down my arms. No girls ever try to rescue me. He stated with no bitterness, only amusement, Its part of the job, butyoure pretty much on your own around here. We have no security guards. Whatever happens happens. I hated it when they were whipping you. I kept talking like a high school girl with a crush. He chuckled softly. It didnt hurt. Leaning in, he placed a deep hot kiss on my back and began to massage down the center of it now. Wow. My back was radiating some wild heat now from the small kiss he had placed there. Thank you he whispered, for caring. I want one of these for my house. Okay, I had to get to my question now. Uhh, Edward? I began. Uhh, Bella? he was smiling, I could tell from his voice. There is something I wanted to ask you. I cleared my throat. Proceed. He purred. He sounded like he knew I was going to ask for sex. Why wasnt I, again, not asking for it? I am in college, NYU, and am studying to be a psychiatrist. A big part of my grade this year comes from me doing a thesis, to study the mind of someone special, complex. In a sense, to become a psychiatrist to my subject. That sounds very interesting, Bella. He was working my back with vigor now, loosening the kinks in my muscles so well it was scary. Yea. I widened my eyes, feeling his hands melting my resolve away. I wanted himwas so aroused I wanted to leap on him right this second. But I kept talking. I thought I had someone picked out but they backed out on me at the last minute. I informed, laying my cheek to the floor, in a daze from what his hands were doing to me. I can still feel his hot kiss on my spine. Thats too bad. He was really listeningI think. I spun around suddenly, holding my shirt over my bra, now underneath him.

Will you be mine? I blurted out and he smiled at me. I mean I put a hand on his chest as he began to move down towards me, I mean, will you be my subject? I think youre very interesting. His brow creased in confusion. I wondered if he ever got an offer like this one before. What are you asking me, exactly? he asked tenderly, no hint of rudeness. I can pay you I said up front, remembering Alices words about strippers only doing things for money, I have a little inheritance my grandmother left me. He stood up, extending his hand to me to help me up. Would he throw me out now? I gave him one hand of mine and he gently helped me to my feet. Lets sit down. He motioned to the sofa. I hurriedly put my shirt on and held it closed, sitting down as he joined me, very close to me. I guess personal space was not a big deal around here. How long would you like me? he asked, sounding serious about doing this now. Uhha week or twoI guess. I shrugged. Two weeks? he folded his hands, Days and nights? Yes. I replied, being greedy, But when I have a class, you can do what you want. I do have some work lined up in the next couple weeks. He looked deep in thought, I am very popular. He smiled a crooked smile at me. Oh, well I would want to go with you to that. I informed, That would also be part of my paper, seeing your life, getting to know you Well I guess I can bring you on some of those jobs. He pondered out loud, looking me up and down briefly, But Im not sure if my life is for you. Itsstrange. Thats why I want you. I pointed out, I mean, as my subject. How much are you offering? he asked, still very polite and amiable. How much are you asking? I had no idea what to offer him. Suddenly it seemed 5 million dollars wouldnt be enough. Was I actually talking about renting this man? God, Charlie would barbeque me. Twenty five thousand dollars. He said with a deep voice, his eyes smoldering. I let a gasp out of my mouth. For 14 days? Am I that disgusting? Thats like$1500 a DAY! I complained. $1,785 a day. He corrected, quite the little calculator now, leaning in and moving my sleeve up, placing a wet kiss on my shoulder, taking a careful painless bite, And I would earn my salary, Bella. Wow. Now $25,000 doesnt sound that unreasonable to me.

And it seems to me he still thinks I am buying him for sex games for 2 weeks. I dont think he even believes my thesis story. Men. I have $20,000. I said honestly. He was suddenly very business-savvy now and it was here I saw the brain behind the body. This was not his first time doing this and that was obvious. Do you have a dorm room or apartment? he asked, wanting the details of this job. Apartment. I responded, I live alone. One bed? Yes. I began to say something else but he smiled and said, Shhh, its no problem, Im just asking. I shut up and answered more of his questions. Finally, he said, I will give you my answer within the hour. Wait at your table and Ill come to you. If I accept, I get a cashiers check for the $20,000 up front. If I fail to perform my duties, you are free to cancel the check. If you cancel the check after Ive completed my 2 weeks, you will be opening a very nasty can of worms. I dont like to sound this way, Bella, Im sure you are honest but I have to say that before we go any further. I have been burned before and have to protect myself. You understand? He scared me for a second there but now his eyes were back to being kind and friendly. Yes I do. I said with a little voice, I wouldnt cancel the check, Edward. He leaned in and kissed my lips again, no tongues but still erotic and long. His mouth was softer than melted butter and he tasted like cherries. How does he DO that? I like your mouth. He growled, taking another kiss to my neck. Yours isnt bad, either. I said sarcastically, touching his large shoulder with a trembling hand. It felt like warm marble. Let me take you back to your friends. He kissed my neck again, then stood slowly and picked up his costume pieces from the floor. He took my hand into his again and lead me out of the room, silently walking me back to the noise of the club area. I was in a daze. I had actually asked this man to belong to me for 2 weeks and he was going to consider it now! Oh God Im a lawbreaker! And a JOHN! Im going to hell for this. Worse, Ill be a guest on Jerry Springer! Edward led me to my table and Alice and Rosalie stared at us, smiling. He gave my hand a long kiss and whispered, Thank you, Bella, for a wonderful time. He pushed my chair in for me and kissed the top of my head, and then he was gone, faded into the darkness. They dived on me, in a frenzy to get information. Shut up! Shut up! I gritted, Nothing happened so dont ask.

Nothing? Alice asked in disbelief, Oh, come on! He gave me a massage. I informed. Did you talk to him about the thesis thing? Rosalie asked, eating a cherry from her drink. Yea. I stated, wanting a new drink but too scared Edward would be the waiter to bring it to me, Hesthinking about it. He said hell let me know within the hour. Go, girl! Alice punched my arm, almost knocking me over. I didnt tell my friends that I offered to pay him all that money, though. If he said yes, Id tell them tomorrow, in a nice, quiet setting where they could yell at me properly. He wont do it. Rosalie already decided for herself. But then she didnt know about the salary I offered him. )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) EPOV I walked up to Victorias office and knocked on the door. Come in. she called. I leaned in, giving her my smile. Got a minute, Victoria? Always, for you, sweetie. She sparked when she saw me and pushed away from her computer, leaning back in her chair at her desk as I walked in, closing the door behind me. I am thinking about doing a job. I began as usual whenever I was offered a good assignment, Two weeks, being a personal toy, one girl. She smiled, not surprised and began to type in her computer. Name? she asked. Bella Swan. I informed, waiting for her to do the background check as she always did. Victoria looked at her screen, reading as I smirked at her. College student, New York University. She read more, Boring. One parking ticket 1 year ago, paid in full. Her father is chief of police in Forks, Washington. You okay with that? That doesnt bother me. I shrugged, There will be no proof of anything. He cant get me. Well, besides thattheres nothing else herenothing! Victoria informed, looking disappointed. Thats good, isnt it? I grinned, not really surprised that Bella was okay. I guess. Victoria shrugged, leaning back in her chair again, Does that mean you cant be here on your nights? I can be here some nights. I informed, Can I let you know the morning of each day if Ill be in?

Sure, she agreed, always willing to be flexible with me. Get the money first, she reminded me, Dont forget that one time. I know, I told her already. I didnt want to be reminded of my stupid, nave days. Good. Victoria tilted her head, looking me up and down, You were so good tonight. Every single woman here told me how happy you made them. Thanks, Victoria. I put my hands behind my back, smiling at her. Come here. She purred. I smiled a little more, walking over to her chair and getting down on my knees as her legs opened, her little mini dress not covering much of her. I removed my tuxedo collar and cuffs and tossed them to the floor. I kissed her immediately, knowing what she wanted. Come here always meant come fuck me. It had been a little over a week since I was last with her. Ohhh Edward she moaned, loving my rough kisses as I moved her little dress up, revealing her naked and totally shaved pussy. Moving the dress up more, I found the very white Irish breasts, not large but small and pert. I had the whole dress off her now and I placed it on the desk top. Once, I threw her dress and she hurt me for that. Ill never do that again. She was naked now in her leather chair as I groaned, working on her neck, holding her arms down, as she liked it, hard and forceful. I began licking and biting her breasts, making little screams come out of her. I grabbed her out of the chair and threw her back to her desk, kneeling down between her, yanking her legs apart and diving my mouth into her hairless, soft flesh, biting and lapping, licking..sucking. Victorias sounds always drove me to go rougher. She made animal sounds, grunts, growls, heavy savage panting. After I had pleased her a few times with my tongue, and she was good and happy, I flipped her roughly onto her stomach and stood up, unbuttoning my pants and letting them drop to my knees, my throbbing erection piercing into her hot, wet body. She screamed again and again as I pounded into her, my hands gripping her legs, using them to drive her back and forth, harder into my hips as I slammed harder into her tight little cunt. Her small little ass slapped against my pelvis, making a nice sound as I savagely rammed into her over and over again. This is how she liked it. Her hands were gripping the edge of her desk that laid before her, her long mane of hair hiding her face as she rode me. I was close to coming and groaned, Victoria I know, Im coming EDWARD!! she cried out, screeching and clawing the desk, YES!! YES!! FUCK YES!!

She reached orgasm again right before I did and I let out a loud, hard growl as I held her tightly against me now, spewing my juices into her as I shouted out in satisfaction. After a couple minutes, we began to catch our breath and I leaned down, kissing her white little ass cheeks, taking a little bite as she yelped out, giggling. I withdrew from her, grabbing a couple of warm towels from the cabinet to the right of the desk. She always had these ready and close by. I began to clean up and placed a towel over her butt, watching her slowly start to move and turn until she was sitting naked on her desk, looking at me. I zipped up and buttoned my pants, knowing Id take a shower downstairs in the dressing room before I left, as always. I smiled at her and came in for more kisses, holding her hair tightly in my hands. Youre soooo good, Edward. She complimented, laying her head on my shoulder as I stroked her hair. Not as good as Emmett, Im sure. I teased. Oh God, he is being such a baby lately, isnt he? Victoria laughed with me a little bit. He is. I smirked, But you should stroke him a little while Im gone. Whores need reassurance, too, you know, from time to time. Let him know hes still your favorite. What if hes not? Victoria smiled at me suggestively, not hurrying to get dressed. I looked at her, my brow furrowed in confusion. I think youre becoming my new favorite, Edward. She informed without shame or fear of my reaction. I grinned, leaning towards her, purring, Does a raise come with that honor? And my fingers pinched at her little nipples. You little whore she smiled affectionately, Go back to work. Yes, Boss Lady. I gave her a small kiss goodbye for now, putting my collar and cuffs back on and going back downstairs to the nice invisibility of the dark club. I served more drinks and ignored Bellas table on purpose, letting her stew for awhile. The women in the club were all very drunk and rough now and I felt scratches on my back, they felt wet. A couple of women threw me against a wall and made me spill my tray of drinks. One large woman had me pinned to the wall, her arm against the back of my neck, not letting me go as she and her friend proceeded to shove their hands down my pants, thrilled to feel nothing but skin there. I felt the womans who was holding me to the wall and her other hand grabbed my wrist, twisting it around behind my back, at an awkward angle. I felt if I moved too much, it would surely snap. May I turn around? I tried to sound sensual, hoping to free my cheekbone from the hard cement of the wall.

NO! the woman shouted at me as her friend laughed hard. I tried to move back from the wall but the woman was strong and shoved me into it violently. I gave a little growl, not wanting to displease them but they were hurting me. My face was throbbing where she smashed it into the concrete and it was still grinding against the wall now. Do it, Bette. The large woman holding me told the other one. The other woman laughed, quickly reaching into my waist, unbuttoning my pants and unzipping them. Girlsbehaveno need to be rough I cooed with my voice, although my mind was getting pissed off. Shut up, slut! the woman grabbed my hair from the back and hit my cheek into the wall again. DAMN, thats my FACE BITCH! I closed my eyes and waited for them to get done with me so I could go. This sometimes happened at the end of the night. It was an unfortunate part of the job that we had no security here. Ooooh, no underwear they sounded pleased as they yanked my pants down to my knees. I let out a breath as they groped me with callous hands. The woman not holding me to the wall was jerking my penis hard while I growled without words. Looking around, I tried to find Emmett or Jasperor anyone. But I was in a dark area and could see no one. Someone was dancing onstage and the women were all flocked over there, screaming and dancing. Pleaseladies I tried to keep my professional voice as my dick involuntarily hardened in her hand. I winced, hating how easy my penis was. Anything, it seemed, would give me an erection. Even being raped. Then I felt teeth biting into my ass and HARD!! I broke character and screamed out, feeling a hand try to cover my mouth, digging fingers into my face as I tried to struggle out of it, my head jerking from side to side, not getting away from the large hand over my shouting lips. Hold him! the other woman said to the large one holding me and I felt a mouth sucking on my dick. Fuck! I work out every day, how can I not fight this woman OFF ME?! She mustve escaped from prison or something but she was lots stronger than ME! Please dont bite, please dont bite.I prayed. HEY!! I heard a girls voice behind us, LET HIM GO!! A scuffle started behind me that I couldnt see and in seconds I was free. I yanked my pants up and zipped them, turning to see the three college girls fighting with the two women who were harassing me. Bella was on the seven foot womans back, pounding her with her little fists, pulling her hair.

I couldnt believe I felt a smile crawling across my lips. Rosalie and Alice were fighting off the other one. I threw myself into the mix, trying to help Bella with the incredibly tall and muscular woman she was wrestling with. GIRLS, GIRLS!! I tried to calm them all down, not wanting them to get hurt for my sake, Come on, break it up! Lets be good girls now! Emmett found us then and rushed over, separating the women. Go to your tables, go! he told all of them. Bella gave me a look of concern as she walked back to her table. I smiled at her group and followed Emmett to the dressing rooms. Attacked again? Emmett asked as we crossed the red line out of the club area. Yep. I touched my fingers to my cheekbone, feeling blood, just a little. I hurried and checked out my face in the mirror, it wasnt as bad as it felt. A little pink bump, a small scratch next to it. It should take one day for that to heal. I yanked down my pants, looking at my ass in the mirror, a nice red bite mark staring back at me, a little blood on it. Emmett was laughing as I went into my little first aid kit in my drawer and started putting ointment on it. Damn it. I gave a little hiss as the burning medicine soaked into it. Poor little thing. Emmett giggled at me. Im not little, they were just HUGE! I defended, The one holding onto me looked like Andre the Giant! After a few minutes, Jasper came in and asked me, Do you want to see some girl named Bella? Shes outside, asking for you. Yea, let her in. I stuck a large band aid over my bite mark and pulled my pants up, zipping and buttoning. A minute later, Bella was coming in, holding her notebook. I thought shed be nervous to come in here but she looked more concerned about me. Are you alright? she trembled a little, her eyes glistening, Im sorry I didnt see you sooner, I wouldve Its alright, Bella, Im fine. I shrugged, Things get a little scary at the end of the night. They just got a little too drunk and carried away. It happens. Yea, four times a week, to this one! Emmett added in his two cents now as I shot him a stern gaze. Smiling back at Bella, I put her mind at ease. Its all okay, Bella. I assured her, Im a big boy. Im used to it. Nothing bothers you. She stated, How do you do that? Getting back to our business. I took the notebook out of her hand, opening it to a blank page, writing, I would love to work with you, Bella. This is who youre to make the cashiers check out to and Im giving you a couple pieces of my personal information so you can do a background check on me, for your own

safety, of course. Always check any person you dont know, Bella. Its just smart and safer if you ever do this again in the future. I wrote E.C. Construction on her pad, thats who the check would be made out to. Victoria had a business account set up for me that I could put my money into and make it clean, as if I were a contractor fixing roofs for a living. She was more than just a boss here in the club, she was like my unofficial business manager. She taught me things, she guided me, she kept me safe and out of jail. I handed her back the pad and looked up at her little strange smile. I told Victoria I could do a few nights here and there in the next two weeks and shes alright with that. You could join me here, no charge, if you like on those nights. Thats great, she replied, It will help me to see you more, on the job, and in private, both. Emmett sat there but minded his business, not uttering a word now. I was glad. And if you want to write your address down for me I handed her my pen. Oh God, duh. Bella blushed, scolding herself for not thinking to give me that information. I smiled at her as she scribbled on another piece of paper, then tore it out and handed it to me. She included her phone number, too along with the address. I had a pretty good idea that she had never done anything like this before and was on new ground here, but novices didnt bother me. I preferred them to the hardened, jaded ones who acted like they knew everything. Great. I smiled at her as I folded her paper, When do you want me? She turned purple in the cheeks again. I smiled, loving that giveaway blush that told me I was doing my job right. Ummm. She stumbled verbally, Whenever youre free Free. I am never free. This is Saturday, I said to myself aloud, Sunday is a day of rest, so Ill give you tomorrow off, how about Monday? She looked surprised I was planning on coming so fast but said, Cool! Cool. I repeated, grinning at her innocence, I could come make you breakfast if thats okay. Likenine? Her face blushed again. I had to chuckle at her, she was very cute. This would be a fun and easy job. That sounds amazing. She almost whispered, I hate to cook, soand I have no classes until like 1 oclock that day. Then I get home around4, so youd have like 3 hours all to yourself. I could clean her place while she was gonethen maybe make her a nice dinner. This wasnt really part of what she hired me to do but I liked to do anything I could to please my owner while she had me.

She was paying me a lot of money and I always earned my pay, doing whatever I could to please her. I discovered women liked having me clean their house and cook for them, in addition to the sex. I would hate to be like some of my friends and just lay around while she was in school. That is just lazy and dishonest. Bella owns me for two weeks and she would get two weeks of me, even if she wasnt here. Yes, I did ruin women for any other normal man after I had a little stay at their place. So often Id get calls again to come back for another little job. I had a bunch of regulars and that made me feel better than constantly going with strangers all the time. I knew Bella only had this money and it was a special inheritance. I probably wouldnt hear from her again after this job so I intended to be very good to her. She looked like the smart, nose in a book type girl who never got to have much fun. I planned to fix that in these next two weeks. Okay. I agreed, smiling at her, biting my bottom lip curiously as I looked into her eyes. She took a breath, fanning herself with her notebook. God, its hot in here. She panted lightly. Yes. I said, letting my eyes sink into hers without another word. She looked nervous and tired. Well, were gonna get going now. Bella took a step or two away from me. Hey whered you think youre going? I stood up and moved into her, towering over her as my hands touched the walls on each side of her, blocking her from getting away from me. She looked scared, unable to get any words out. It was fun playing with her. No kiss for your boy? I asked sadly, nose to nose with her. Ohokay she shivered as I leaned in, my finger cupping under her chin, tilting her face up to me, waiting breathlessly as I took her in for a nice deep kiss. I didnt use my tongue but opened and closed my mouth with hers over and overmy eyes closing softly as I tasted sex on the beach, the perfect squeaks and sounds of our wet lips colliding in the air. Her voice moaned and she dropped her notebook, flinging her thin arms around my body, her little fingernails lightly moving up and down my back, warming me nicely. She likes me. I ended the kiss a moment or two later, my nose nuzzling hers as I smiled my big happy smile at her. Miss me. I gave her a small order as she smiled like a little girl up at me. I will, she breathed.

I will see you Monday, Bella. I took her hands and placed a kiss on each one. I bent over and picked up her notebook, handing it to her. Call me if you see something on my background check you dont like, but I assure you, Im a good boy. Theres nothing there. But do it anyway. Always. Promise? Yes, Edward. She grinned at me. Good girl. I fixed her hair a little, Let me take you to your table. Hopefully that giant has calmed down out there. I walked her out of the dressing rooms and to the club area, where her cute little friends were waiting for her. Hi girls. I greeted them. Oh God, are you okay? Alice asked, Rosalie also looking worried about me. Oh yea, I forgot about it already. I waved my hand, It happens. Please, dont worry about me. Did you all have a good time tonight? I asked them, still holding Bellas hand as I saw her friends take notice in silence, shooting Bella looks. Oh YEA! Rosalie answered, laughing, We love it here! Weve never done anything like this before, but we are going to become regulars here now! I chuckled. Good, we like young beautiful girls hanging around. Especially tough ones that can rescue me when Im in a jam. Well be your bodyguards. Alice laughed, making fists, Weve got your back, vampire ! His names Edward. Bella interjected. Edward! a girl called from the bar, I need you in a sec! Were hogging you, we should go. Bella let go of my hand. Thanks to all of you again, for your help. I said, a little embarrassed but meaning this. No problem. Rosalie smiled. Goodnight, ladies. I nodded to them, then to Bella, See you soon, love. I kissed her cheek quickly and excused myself, going to the bar to get moving on my bartending duties. I peeked at them as they left the club, looking forward to my upcoming two weeks with an innocent college girl, a brain, too. I knew all that stuff about her thesis and school was just an excuse she was using to make me feel more comfortable with her offer. It was kind of her to think of me but I am bought and sold all the time. It didnt shock me anymore. I got my drinks and balanced the tray on my palm, moving precisely around the partying women to get to my table, watching out this time for dark corners and large women.

BPOV Sunday I spent super cleaning my apartment. Even now, on Sunday night, I wasnt sure it was nice enough here for him. With all the money he made, I was sure his place was some MTV mansion. And I only had the one king sized bed for us to share. I wish I had another bedroom for him, or at least a sofa bed that he could use. But he didnt seem to mind the one bed when I told him about it. Part of me really thrilled at the idea of having him sleep next to me, but the idea that he would see me in the morning made my body tense and sweat in fright. Im sure he looks perfect and sexy in the morningand my eyes pictured that for a few minutes. He told me to miss him. And I am. Damn, something is severely wrong with me. I didnt even know this guy, really. But those kisses. Damn. I had the check all ready for him, made out to E.C. Construction, in an envelope on my kitchen counter, the single word EDWARD written upon it. I apologized again to my dead Grandma, hoping she would understand. I even fantasized that my Grandma was a cool woman, and if there was anything worth buying, this was it, and she would approve. My dad had already called me this morning with the results of my background check. Edward Cullen is a clean, law abiding citizen. On paper, anyway. I told Charlie Rosalie was dating him and that I just wanted to make sure he was alright. I have too much junk food. I was looking in my cabinets now, seeing if I had the right food in the place for my guest. He was probably Mr. Healthfood, with that body of his. Oh, screw it, we could always go food shopping tomorrow night if he wanted anything. God, I am nervous. I had bought five new notebooks to start taking notes and I had my tape recorder set up with 6 new tapes to record our interviews. I hoped that I could do a good job asking him questions that wouldnt insult him but led him to open up to me. I had already seen how good he is at covering up his true emotions, even when he was being attacked in that dark corner at Fire. God, that was purely awful. It felt really good to go in charging after those women, and having my girls right behind me, helping me out was great, too. I didnt even think about itI just saw what they were doing to him and I lost it. I was running towards them before I knew it was happening. I wanted to save him. Thats probably my whole mental reason for paying all this money to have him hereI want to save him. Does he want saving? But what bothered all of us girls was the way Edward took the attack. So calm, so no big dealI didnt believe it for a second. He was hiding. Covering things up, putting on a happy face. I wanted that happy mask off his face. I want to see the real Edward.

I took a nice shower after dinner and for some unknown reason, I shaved my legs, the entire length of each one, and any unsightly hair anywhere else on my body. Was I expecting him to see my body? No. Yes. I dont know. I was so confused and torn that my head began to pound. I went to bed at 9 oclock that night, too exhausted mentally to worry about another thing anymore. The next morning I had my alarm set for 7am, but I was awake at 5:30 am. I couldnt sleep. I felt like it was Christmas morning and I was 3 years old waiting for Santa to arrive. Its May so the weather is warm and sunny and sunlight fills every room here. Of course, there are only four rooms. My bedroom, the bathroom, the kitchen, and the living room. The rooms were pretty good sizes but this was a cozy little place. If Edward gets mad at me in the next two weeks, he wasnt going to lose me in here. Hed most likely have to go out for awhile to cool off. I was all dressed and looking alright by 6:24am. So now I had to wait around until 9am for Edward to arrive. I adjusted everything three times, cleaned a little more, and looked out my window several times, watching strangers walk past. Time seemed to crawl by. I almost fell asleep again when at 9:34am, a knock playfully tapped on the door. I hate late people. I found myself rushing to the door when I really shouldnt have answered it at all. I wondered if I could knock some money off his twenty grand paycheck if he was going to be late like this all the time. I didnt know what to expect when I opened the door but , there he was, dressed very normally, in a white t-shirt and light blue jeans, taking off his black sunglasses as I pulled the door ajar, revealing those fierce bright green eyes. He had one single duffle bag hanging from his shoulder and at seeing me, his smile grew larger. I couldnt be mad at him with a smile so bright. Jesus, I am too easy. Bella. He waited there, I didnt hear from you so Im guessinghopingeverything is okay. You did the check on me, right? Yes. I waited for him to enter, Everything is fine. Come on in, Edward. Thank you. He said, just as polite as he was in the club the other night. Wowthis is nice. He entered, respectfully, lying to me. Well, its clean and warm. I shrugged, And no bugs. In New York, thats a palace. He laughed softly, Sure is. I gave him the small tour and he followed me five steps to the bathroom, then ten steps back to see the bedroom, and the tour was over. I know its small. I looked down, making a face, If you want to change your mindwe dont have to do this.

Stop. Edward placed his bag down carefully and was coming over to me, he moved his hands over my hair and held my face again. He leaned in, giving me a tender, moist kiss and said in a low voice, I like it here, Bella. Damn it, he smells good. And his mouthhow does he make it that soft all the time? His breath was cool and like spearmintmmmmm. You do? I asked, not sure why. Yes. He looked down into my eyes, making me his fool instantly, This is where you are. God, he is good at delivering a line. Before I knew it, he was kissing me again, and my back was leaning against the wall of the living room. My stomach made a gurgling sound and his eyes opened, latching onto my wide, embarrassed ones. His kissing mouth smiled and broke its kiss from mine. Are you hungry? he purred, going to his bag, taking out a couple of plastic food store bags, moving into the kitchen, Ive got eggs, cheese, onions, some bacondo you like omelets? He could cook me rocks for breakfast and I would eat them, loving it. He looked at me with such an energetic look in his eyes. Is he acting again now? I cant even tell. He just went in one second from Don Juan to Julia Childs. Yea, I love eggs. I informed, watching him, amazed by him again. He would make a very complex study, indeed. I feel like a mad scientist. Its likewhatever he thinks I wanthe becomes that instantly. Good. He smiled, I will make you the best omelet youve ever had, Omelet de Eduardo. He laughed at his fake little Spanish accent as he completed that sentence. Wow, you cook too. I came up and sat on the little bar stool at the kitchen counter, watching him getting acquainted with my kitchen. He easily found a pan and a bowl and took out a spatula, preparing everything. I do everything. He raised a brow at me suggestively, being a busy little bee while I smiled at him. Wow. Oh is that right? I teased him back, grinning, hoping that would ease the heat I was already feeling in the pit of my gut, So, what makes your Omelet de Eduardo so special? He bit his bottom lip, Me. He said and he chuckled as I smirked back at him, liking his style and confidence. I wish I had either of those. I didnt know what that meant exactly but as I looked down at my TV guide, pretending I wasnt really interested in what he was doing, I saw him doing something with his shirt. Looking up fast, I saw he removed his t-shirt and made it into a little apron, tucking the short sleeves into his jeans, his smooth oil-free chest looking much softer now, easier to see in the sunlight. I was going to tell him to put his shirt

back on, but it was getting hotter in hereand my eyes werent done studying every line and ripple they could drink in. He turned on the flame under the pan and tossed a slab of butter to the hot surface, his hands mixing up the eggs in the bowl. Peeking up at me from under his long eyelashes, he smirked. Breathe, Bella. He teased, seeing right through my cool, nonchalant act. I am breathing. I said a little defensively as he turned his back to me, cooking the eggs now. I felt my face get red hot. No, dont blush, dont blush Oh. I saw his envelope sitting there right in front of me, This is for you. I handed it to him, knowing this moment was the one that now defined me as someone who was paying money to a male prostitute. I half expected NBCs To catch a predator film crews to come flying in here now. Letting the eggs sit in the pan to harden a little, Edward turned to me, taking the envelope with a slow hand, looking into my face, then, reluctantly, he opened it and peeked inside for two seconds. Thank you, Bella. He said simply, folding it in half and shoving it into his back pocket, You wont be sorry, I promise. He went back to cooking and I stared at his back, trying to find something cool to say back to him. All that came out, though, was truth. I feel reallyweird I admitted, Ive never paid anyone to live with me before. Its nothing personal. I dolike you. Its just strange for me. Doing this. No big deal. He smiled at me, assuring me, Forget you paid me. Or dont. Whatever makes you feel good, comfortable around me. People buy things every day, in stores, things they need. How is this any different? Dont worry, Bella. I know how to make you relax. It will be great, trust me. Somehow I already was trusting him, a little. Soon he was putting the eggs on two plates now and set one down in front of me, along with buttered toast and bacon. Pouring me a nice glass of milk, he came up to the other stool beside me. May I? he asked. Sure. I pulled the chair out a little for him, And, you dont have to be so formal. This is your place now, too, for the next 2 weeks. I want you to make yourself at home. Alright, Edward? Alright. Thanks. He smiled at me warmly, taking a bite of his bacon. I began to eat and it was actually very good. Nice and cheesy with a little taste of onion. And then he began talking to me. So he ate as he asked me, What are the rules? Rules? I asked, putting down my glass of milk. Yes. He licked his lips, finishing off his bacon before he even touched the eggs.

I didnt reallymake any rules. I fumbled, trying to think of some now, coming up blank, Like I said, Im new at this stuff. What kind of rules do you usually have? Everyone is different. He shrugged, Like, one woman likes me kneeling in front of the door naked every night as she comes home from work. Stuff like that. God, how humiliating. Again, my stomach twisted in knots with pity for what this man puts himself through. No. I looked at him with a frown, then made my face lose the grimace, I wont have any thing like that. Im notinto that stuff. He chuckled at me as my cheeks flushed hotly, imagining him kneeling naked at my door when I came home from school. What if Rosalie or Alice were with me? Yea, I know, theyd never stop thanking me. Come on, Bella, its nothing to be ashamed of. Surely you have some fantasies. Edward was looking at me curiously as he ate with his fork now, taking big bites of the eggs. He doesnt nibble his food, I noticed, he devours it. Yea, becoming a psychiatrist. I informed flatly, And after we eat, we can get to work, okay? Dont call it work, Bella, lets just have fun and enjoy each other. He said with a breezy air to his voice. Well, we can have fun at times but it wont all be enjoyable. I pointed out, almost finished eating, There will be very hard questions to answer eventually and I want you to know that I am here for you. I will never judge you or put you down, I promise you that. I just want you to be as open and honest as you can be. 2 weeks is not that long to really get to know you, but if you are willing to cooperate and be truthful, I think we can make some progress before our time together is up. Oh wait something was dawning on him now, I think I understand. You want me to be the patient and youre the psychiatrist. Is that right? Yea. I looked at him like he just grew two heads, I thought that was clear. I told you about this. In that Awaken room, remember? His smile looked amused. So I can be the poor, sex addicted patientand you can try to cure me of my wicked waysI like this game! He leaned in, trying to kiss my earlobe, almost standing up now, ready to start playing. No, Edward. I almost whined, I am not role playing. I am in college studying to become a psychiatrist. For REAL. I want you to be my subject. I will be getting to know about you, your life, your pastwe discussed this the other night. Do men ever listen to us? Even half naked hot men? That was for real? he asked, frowning, I thought you were too scared to ask me to be your toy and you were being classy about asking me. Toy? I felt hotter now. I knew it. He thinks hes here to service me for two weeks. And Im arguing with him because??

Yea. He shrugged, looking over at my face closely again, Dont you want to play with me, Bella? I lost all speech at this point. Even my dead Grandma is saying YES! somewhere in the cosmos right now Im sure. My mouth hung open as he stood and leaned in again, kissing his mouth into my neck. I think hes figured out my weak spot. Damn it, this feels soooo good. Heat. Wet. Tongue. Lick. Teeth. Gently closing. Hot breath. Ill be a good little toy, Bella he purred affectionately, licking my jugular vein. UhhhhI felt my eyes rolling back into my head but I actually found the strength to squirm away from him a little, off my stool and in the kitchen now, putting the counter between us. Edwards eyes looked a little sad as I said, Please, Edward? This is very important to me, its a big part of my grade. Pleasedo this for me. He looked around now, seeing the sofa and the coffee table with the tape recorder on it, and the blank tapes, and my notebooks, pens on top of them. I almost saw a bit of fear there in his face as he realized I wasnt kidding about this. For the first time I was not seeing happy, carefree, dance club Edward. This is gooda little peek at the man behind the mask. Youre saying Im sick. He stated, not asking me, his hurt eyes looking back at mine. No! I tried to take a step or two towards him, Never! And you want to analyze me like some germ under a microscope, is that it? he asked further, yanking his shirt out of his jeans, looking embarrassed suddenly, and putting the shirt back on. Crap. No, Edward! I made myself grab his bare arms into my hands as I looked up at his face, I just need to find an interesting person to interview for awhile and then I type a report of what Ive discovered. Thats all. He took a hard breath, not moving away from me. I dont like this, Bella. He muttered quietly. But you were willing to--- I began, stopping myself, seeing his eyes spark in understanding. But I was willing to be your toy for 14 days? he finished for me, Yes. Thats what I do, what I am good at. You didnt find me in a library, Bella, you know what I am. Pleaseyoure taking me wrong I almost pleaded to him, hating the look in his face. Already I was hurting my patient. I had to soothe him and put him at ease. I understand that you have a problem with trust. I began, But How would you know that about me? Edward frowned at me now, You know nothing about me. You have no idea what my problems are.

I was fucking this up so bad and we havent even started yet. Come on, Bella, fix this now. I would like to, Edward. I said with a tender voice, Pleasegive me a chance. Please help me. I need you. I think this is so much easier thanall Im asking you to do is talk to me. I am not asking you to do anything else. I knew I was asking him to leave his comfort zone and he might bolt. No. he realized what I was saying, looking at me with more sadness, I canttake 20 grand from you for two weeks of just talking. Why would you pay me all that money just to ask me some questions about my childhood? Thats how badly I want this. I admitted, giving in, Im sorry, Edward. I never meant to make you feel sick orlike a germ. I really like you and would never intentionally do that. If you want to go, you can go. But I really hope you stay. I sat on my stool, unable to look at that wounded puppy look in his face anymore. I made him feel sick already. I suck. Maybe I should just be a bank teller or something where I cant hurt people. I put my head in my hands, waiting for him to take off with my check. After a long silence, finally Edward spoke. If I do this he began, You must give me equal time. What I mean is, I will be your patientANDyour toy. You may study me and let mestudy you in return. That is the only way I can stay. I took a deep breath. If I wanted his honesty, then I should be honest with him as well. I am going to be totally honest with you Edward. I announced, Yes, I am extremely attracted to you, and I know you know that. I have not had a great sex life. I have been with one person and it lasted 33 seconds and I hardly even remember it. Yes, I have fantasies and dreams and desires that Ive done nothing about. And a big part of me wants to show those to youbut Imafraid. I am going to be totally honest with you, Bella. He announced back to me, Yes, I am very (he closed his eyes for a second then opened them) messed up and I know you know that. I have not had a greatlife. I have been with lots and lots of women and can not connect with a single one of them unless theres sex involved. I have dreams and desires that Ive done nothing about, too. And a big part of me wants to share those with youbutIm afraid too. I donttalk to peopleabout ME. Ever. So we have a lot in common, then. I glanced down at my sneakers, then back up to his tense face, Alright, Edward. Deal. Butplease be patient with me, okay? The thing is, you do scare me and dazzle me at the same time and that makes me very nervous. Im not used to those feelings. Maybe as we get to know each other more, Ill begin to feelmore comfortable around you. He grinned, crossing his arms, I dazzle you? Frequently. He smiled and relaxed again, purring, Ill go slow if you do. Agreed. I said, taking a breath, feeling better about our arrangement now.

Then a naughty part of me reared its ugly head and I added, And take your shirt off. Rule one dont wear any shirts in here. A wicked little smile spread across his face and I had to smile my own bad girl smile in return. He looked surprised at me. I was surprised at me, too. Why, Bella he feigned shock, taking off his shirt, I think I may be able to help you after all. He came up to me and put his shirt around my neck like it was a scarf. I just stood there, gazing up into those intense eyes, wondering what was going on inside him now. I like rule number one. He almost whispered, coming in for another kiss, his fingers curling slightly under my chin again. I could never resist his kisses. They were hot and melty and sensual. Most of all is the way they made me feel. Sexy and beautifuland desirable, like someone else completely. I was believing the lie. I was falling for him like every other woman he worked for. I needed to stop this and act professionally, like a psychiatrist would. Would a doctor take advantage of her patient like this ? I took a step backwards and broke the kiss while Edwards mouth was still in puckered mode. He watched me moving away from him like I had done something wrong but then his face quickly turned friendly and devilish again. I have school in a couple of hours, so I thought it would be good to have a little session before I go. I walked past him, over to the living room area. I sat on the green sofa and figured he could sit in the nice easy chair across from me. I had the first blank tape in the machine already, so I picked up my new notebook and opened it to the first page, taking a pen. Would you like to sit down, Edward? I asked very sweetly, pointing my pen casually to the chair. I thought the patient gets the couch. He tried to joke as he turned towards the living room. Do you want the couch? I asked. Yes. He was already being a little difficult, but not overly so. Fine. I stood up and took the chair. I watched him slowly move to my sofa. I thought hed sit there but he was laying down on his back, putting one of his masculine legs over the back of it. His chest was completely bare and that was so appealing to me, I hated lots of hair on men. His strong arms folded behind his head and he closed his eyes. No underarm hair, either. Nice. I noticed his jeans were so low on his hips that I could see the cuts in his pelvis. I wonder if he has underwear on. He should be in a calendar. Damn it, there I go again. I knew what he was trying to do. Distract me. It wasnt going to work. Much. I will never see my sofa the same way ever again. God, he looks good laying there. I am ready, Dr. Bella. he said with a calm voice, You may have your way with my brainand later, my body. Although I think you may enjoy one more than the other.

He snickered, peeking at me like a little boy. I couldnt help smiling at him. He is so cute when he laughs. Alright. I began, hitting the record button and saying, Edward Cullen Session One. Just Edward. He said firmly, Edwardokay? His eyes did not look insulted, just asking. Alright, Edward Session One. I corrected, It bothers you when I use your last name? I dont have a last name when Im working. He still used a nice voice, staring up at the ceiling. Family issues. Do you have a family? I asked. He closed his eyes and I could tell he already was having a hard time. No, I landed here in a spaceship when I was three. He said, dripping with sarcasm. Edward I almost grinned. My parents knew my planet was going to explode so they put me in this little ship he continued, smirking a little, his eyes glancing at me. I had to be patient and understanding with him. I was trying. Avoidance. I waited, not saying anything until he decided to speak again. He still had my check in his back pocket. I wanted to bring that up but then I didnt. I had to let him come to me. Yes I had a family. He said quietly, his eyes closed again. Had I repeated, What happened to them? Nothing. He gave a little sigh, I meanI dont know. I dont see them anymore. That didnt surprise me. Do they know aboutyou working at Fire? I asked, wishing this sounded more like a real conversation and not me just firing questions at him. This is why I needed these assignments. I had to get better at this. Practice would be the only way to do it. No. he kept his eyes closed, I dont think so. I started working there after I lost contact with them. Hmm. Something else broke him away from his family. Interesting. Edward I liked using his name, I wanted him to feel comfortable talking to me, What was it that caused you to stop talking to your family?

Can I ask yousome questionsafter I answer one of yours? he looked over at me, those eyes of hiscould I really say no to anything he wanted? Is that professional? Patients dont get to ask their doctors personal questions. Please? he added. God. Alright, Edward. My family my mother and father, are very richand very cold. He said, They were never around when I was growing up. They were always too busy. I had no brothers and sisters. I became closer to the household staff than to them. But I got used to that. But then, when I was going to college, I met a girl they didnt like, didnt approve of. I dont think they LIKE anyone, even themselves. They told me it was either her or them. And I had to choose. I chose her. He stopped and then rolled over onto his stomach, displaying his nice, tight little ass in their tight denim prison. My turn. He smiled at me, looking me up and down. Okay. I grinned, glad he was looking more relaxed now. Have you ever had an orgasm? he asked right out as if he were asking me what size shoe I wore. God! I turned bright red and I knew it. He smiled at me, liking my embarrassment. What? he asked innocently, Its a yes or no question, I thought that was an easy one. He would think that. No. I said simply, watching his eyes lower a bit. He was looking at my body now. Shit! I lifted my open notebook a little, hoping to hide whatever he was checking out on me. So I went to my next question, When your parents saw that you chose this woman, what, they justkicked you out of the house? The house, the college, the money, everything. Edward informed, looking across the room now, but I could see in his head, he was seeing them. Theyre dead to me. He said after a moment, Cant we talk about something else, please? They were never a real part of my life. I dont miss them. But I can see it bothers you. I said gently, Have you ever tried to make any contact with them since that argument? He pinched the bridge of his nose and looked down into the sofa. I waited, not saying a thing until he raised his head up and said, Once. I began to talk again but he cut me off sharply, And Im not talking about that now so dont ask.

They were never a real part of his life, he says. Oh no, theyre only the knife that is sticking out of his heart, theyre not important. To be rejected at such an early ageand neglected all through his childhood. Did that mean he never got to finish college, then? His parents certainly did major damage. He had not learned love from them. Perhaps this is partly why it is so hard for him to show love to others. It was his turn to ask me something now. I had a feeling this question would be tougher. Tell me one of your fantasies. His voice oozed sensuality and he gave me the sexy eyes now, waiting. He put his arms under his chin and smiled at me as I began to try to speak. Is he playing with me or does he really want to know? Ummm I felt my face turn hot again, I have some abandonment issues, I know that. My father divorced my Mom when I was 3, soI have somedark fantasies. Ooooh, goodie! Edward wasnt frightened of this, Continue. And stop talking like a shrink, please. Why am I bearing my soul to this guy? Even my best friends didnt know my darkest secret fantasies. Well, I have this one kinda fantasy that I amforced. I looked down at my notebook, afraid to look at his face now. Rape fantasy. He said, still unafraid and smiling, How? I swallowed and shrugged, A few different fantasies on that. Sometimes I dream I come home and he grabs me from behind. Sometimes I am walking home and someone grabs me from behind and pulls me into a van or somethinglike that. I felt like it took me 30 years to get through those few sentences. Now I was starting to see how Edward felt answering my questions. Maybe that is his plan, to show me what its like, being on the hot seat. He is very smart. You seem to like the idea of being taken from behind. He teased, his face still resting on his burly arms, his smile still there and giving me no reason to feel shame. Back to my question. I reminded him, blushing and trying to keep my face straight. Go. He stared back at me intently, ready. Tell me about the girl you metin college. I decided to drift away from his parents for a little bit. Why? he looked a little tense again. Well, its obvious she meant something to you. I said, You gave everything up to be with her. Did you love her?

He looked at me with another hard expression. No, I just liked the smell of her perfume. He avoided my question again with a sarcastic remark, raising his face off his arms now. Okay. I agreed, Soyou loved her. This is good, I feel like Im already getting to know him better, even though hes not going down quietly. He didnt argue against my statement. He had loved someone. But now he was alone, it seems, and a stripper, prostituting himself. Something horrible must have happened. Cant ask that in the first session. Too soon. Can I just ask you her name? I went slow as he requested. He hesitated. Something very deep was going on inside his eyes as he looked away. God whatever happened it must have been awful. He cant even tell me her name. I just waited, not pushing. Minutes later, he looked at me with true sorrow in his eyes and breathed, I cant. Its alright, you dont have to say it. I assured him with my voice and smile. Im sorry, Bella. He breathed again, looking at his open hands in slight shame. Its alright. I said again, just as carefully as before, Youre doing so great. I know this is hard. I appreciate that youre talking to me at all. This seemed to make him feel better and he exhaled a long breath, relaxing his body again. My turn? he asked me, not sure now, since he couldnt answer my last question. Go ahead. I gave in to him. Do you ever dream of being tied up? he asked, smiling sweetly, always getting right to the heart of things. Frequently. I decided to own up to it. This was common so I didnt mind answering. Either that, or being with Edward made me braver than usual. Bella. Edward purred in delight, We are going to have so much fun on my time I blushed and smiled at the same time, tired of making myself so rigid and professional. I could tell, with Edward, the more open I was with him, the more he would trust me and let me in a little more. I tried to concentrate on what to ask him next but all I could think of now was Edward tying me up. Before I could help myself, I just asked, Have you ever been tied up? Frequently. He used my word without missing a beat, his dreamy smile still playing on his moist shiny lips. Wow. Wish I could hear some of those stories. Wait, I can, if he wants to discuss it.

Really? I asked, my face almost frowning, What is it like? He shrugged, grinning slightly, All depends whos tying you. If youre with an angry, violent person, its going to hurt. If youre with a sexual, horny person, it is quite pleasant, actually. Sometimes all they want is the illusion that youre helpless and tied up. Like in the vampire cage. I can get my hands in and out of those cuffs whenever I want and everyone sees that. But as long as I pretend I cant get out and I scream and struggle a little bit, they get their fantasy. And you let angry, violent people tie you up? I asked without thinking. The pay is very good. He said flatly. But they could hurt you. I said a little louder, trying to calm my voice. Suddenly I was afraid for him and wanted to talk sense into him. They DO hurt me, thats the point. He said blankly. What if it got out of control and someone did serious harm to you? I wondered aloud. I have a manager. He informed, She knows where my jobs are and when. If anything happens to me, she would know and come after me. How do they hurt you? I asked, feeling very protective of him now. There are lots of ways to torture a slave, Bella. He shrugged, shaking his head a little, I could go on forever. But some of themthe whip, the cane, needle play, electricity, fire, nipple clamps Whoa, wait. I held a hand up, Electricity? Not what youre thinking. He grinned, There are different little machines out now. Some of them are little sticky pads that are placed on the skin in different places and then theres a little dial the woman would control theintensity. Then she hits a button and I get a little zap. God, Edward I shivered from just the thought of it. Its alright. He smiled, It makes no marks or anything. No permanent damage. No, only mental damage. No big deal. Hey you just asked a whole bunch of questions, I think its my turn. He reminded me with a bigger smile. Oh, yea, sorry. I forgot our deal for a minute. God, I am already caring about him in a big way. Im not supposed to get that involved with a patient. Im already screwing up this assignment. Do you like pain? Edward asked me. He is trying to find out what I like, what I want him to do to me. No. I said right out, I dont want to be electrocuted or anything. No, no. he chuckled at me, I wouldnt do that to you. I told you, I will only do what you want me to do. I mean, light pain. Have you ever wanted to be spanked a little? Lightly!

I dont know I felt warm all over now, Maybe. This made Edward smile to himself. I see a light spanking in my future. Something inside me was actually happy about this. I felt my heart pounding excitedly. I notice that youre okay talking about sex. I began as he watched me in amusement, But when I ask you personal questions you struggle with that. Thats not a question. He said in a low voice, his eyes fixed on me. Okay. I chewed on my pen cap, Do youfind that physical pain is easier to endure thanemotional pain? I think I was onto something here. He looked like he was thinking this over himself and finally he said, Let me put it this way - if I had a choice between talking to my parents again or being stuck all over my body with needles There was a brief pause. I would take the needles. He said, his voice like ice, Make of that what you like. God, hes been stuck with needles. This man is very sad, that much is clear. Im not sure if I can do anything to help him. But I so want to. And now, this wasnt about my grade anymore. I really want to help him. Help him to stop doing what hes doing and have a better life. It became my new mission. A loud knock banged on the door and I jumped from the sudden interruption. Edward didnt flinch or move in the slightest, only to cast his eyes at the door and then at me. Want me to get it? he asked, beginning to stand up. I saw the clock and it was nearly time for me to be going to school now. I knew it was Rosalie and Alice coming as usual to walk with me to class. A fiendish smile crept up my lips and I said, Yea, thanks Edward. He grinned at me and winked, back in dance club mode, and bit his bottom lip, opening the door half way, seeing my friends and revealing just enough of himself so they could get a good look at him. Propping his arm up against the door, he smiled at them and purred, Hello again. I was trying not to laugh from my chair, wishing I could see their faces. I had not told them he would be here today. It would be a complete shock to them, seeing Edward half naked, answering my door. I only heard two sets of gasping, panting voices in the hall. I heard Alice going, This is the rightplace, yea, is Bella here? Oh, great. Poor Alice thought for a second she went to the wrong apartment. Ive only lived here for 3 years !

Well, yes, but shes very tired. Edwards voice was like melted sex, And Im not sure Im finished with her yet. What a little devil. I hurried to the door before he told my friends I wasnt going to school today. I need to go, I had to have a little break from Edward, he was breaking me down already, very expertly so. School would be the one place I could clear my mind and talk to my friends about what the hell I should do. Oh God, this deal I made. When I come home later, it would be his turn to be in charge of our activities. What did I do? Hi guys. I grabbed the knob and pulled it all the way open, watching Edward grin at me and back away from the door now. Come in. I said to them. They always came in for a little while first to chat before we had to get going. Uh, hi Bella. Rosalie said, her voice a little on the bitchy side as they walked in. Edward was in the kitchen, taking our used dishes and forks, starting to wash the dishes without a word. Jesus, that is sexy. A man washing the dishes without being asked. And with that bare chestI wish hed get wet and soapy by accident. I almost forgot my friends were here until Alice started talking. Hey, Rose. I sat at a bar stool at the counter of the kitchen, not wanting to lose sight of my brand new dishwasher. Alice came around to my side of the counter, hidden from Edwards view and slapped my arm hard, making her mouth form the word WOW!! Her hands were flailing around her head silently yelling to me as I gave a little giggle at her. Rosalie was staring at Edward, too, especially in his crotch area, if I could judge by the lowering of her eyes. Im sure Edward noticed all the non-talking going on but he didnt act strangely at all. He moved over towards us, across the counter, a wash cloth sitting over one shoulder, Would you like anything to eator drink? I can fix something real quick if you like. He looked at me, Rosalie and Alice, waiting for a response. This man is going to spoil the shit out of me. Rosalie smiled at him like her husband returning from war now. I gave her a kick to her ankle, waking her up. Oh, no, thats alright. She straightened, looking nervous now. No, thanks. Alice saw him smile to her, I ate. Well, if you change your minds, just whistle. He winked and went back to the corner of the room, out of view, the water running again as he washed the pan. He was humming to himself quietly, not intruding on our silent talking. The melody was beautiful, not to mention his deep erotic voice.

Alice made a circle around us three girls with her finger and motioned to the door. She wanted to chew me out or congratulate me outside, it looked like. I nodded and went to get my bag, taking my notebook with me. I grabbed my purse and worked the door key out of my key ring, going around the round metal clasp until it was loose. I motioned them out first with my hand, waving them away. They began walking into the kitchen area, in front of me, being extra sweet now that they were in Edwards line of sight. Edward, were going to school. I made myself say a bit loudly. The water went off and when I came into the kitchen he was walking towards us, drying his perfect hands on the towel that was happily laying over his bare shoulder a moment ago. It was nice seeing you two again. He smiled at the girls, hands going on his hips, Next time you must stay longer. Charming. Man, hes good. They both giggled at him and fumbled at the door, apparently they forgot how to use a doorknob while in Edwards presence. He played the perfect gentleman, saying, Allow me, please. And he opened the door for them, now behind it. He must think women are all retarded if this is how they all act when he speaks to them. Alice and Rosalie went through the door, standing in the hall waiting for me now as I stood in front of Edward, handing him the key. This is the house key in case you want to go out. I began, I have another one so you can use this one the whole time youre here. Alright. He had a pleasant look on his face as he listened closely to me, taking it and shoving it into his front jeans pocket. Andmake yourself at home. I repeated, truly wanting him to feel at ease here. From the way he laid on the sofa maybe I was worrying about this unnecessarily. Do anything you want. I motioned with my hand around the apartment, not sure why, and dropped my hand at my side, Ill be home around four. If theres anything special you need, food-wise, make me a list and Ill get it for you. What else? I felt like I was leaving a little child alone here all day. I had to stop this. Hes a man, older than me, even! Hes not a moron, hell be fine. Just stop this already. The edge of his mouth turned up a little bit as I rambled on. I was entertaining him now. And I left my cell phone number there on the pad by the phone if you need to call me. I informed. Yea, thatll happen. Everything will be fine, Bella. He assured me, Dont worry. He lowered his voice so only he and I could hear now and he leaned in, close to my ear, adding, I know you love to worry, but dont. One thing I am going to teach you is how to relax.

He straightened up and gave me that wonderful crooked smile. Uhhokay, then. I couldnt think of a witty comeback to that one, I willsee you at four. He stood there, grinning at me, not saying anything. Bye Edward. I felt my eyes wetten a little, not sure why. Deep down I wondered if hed be here when I got home. Was he conning me? Maybe he didnt like my questions just now and didnt want to be here anymore. Maybe I was walking out the door, backpack over my shoulder when he said, Bella. A bit loudly, not angrily so, just acting like I forgot something. Yea? I stopped and turned towards him. Alice and Rosalie were standing right outside the threshold of the doorway, eyes glued to us. Come here. He said invitingly. I came closer to him, feeling my blood quicken and my heart thudding away in my chest, wondering if he wanted what I think he wanted. I still was not used to this, having the attention of a man this delicious. Or any man, for that matter. Excuse us, ladies. Edward still acted proper, just closing the door a little bit, to hide us from their view momentarily. I glanced at them as they got hidden by the door and looked up at his happy green eyes. You keep on trying to get away from me without kissing me goodbye. I dont like it. He purred, acting hurt as he grabbed my arms and brought them up a bit, bringing my mouth to his open, hungry one. The kiss was a bit rough but incredible! His lips had to be the most sleek, warm, wet pair in the United States. I still couldnt get over it. The faint taste of Omelet de Eduardo and bacon, mixed with a bit of that spearmint danced into my mouth as I kissed him back, trying to match his energy and enthusiasm. Im sure Rosalie and Alice could hear our kissing sounds out there but I forgot about them again. And all the world was only him and I. Without warning, he released my arms and my body came down a bit, my mouth losing his too soon. Go learn something. He opened the door for me all the way and rested his cheek against the edge of it, smiling at me as if I were the most beautiful girl hed ever seen. Grandma, thank you for your inheritance. I had no idea money could buy me something like THIS but I was so satisfied with my purchase so far. And this was only day one! Right away I hated thinking of Edward that way. I am just as bad as those bitches who hurt him and made him kneel naked at the door as they come in. I really do have some dark places inside me. I have always known that but having Edward here, I know it more.

Curious, though, I get so angry when I think of someone else using or hurting Edward. I would make a note of that later, I decided. Any special instructions for me before you go? he asked, the wonderful sexy smile still on his face. His expressions look so real, not phony at all. He is a very good actor, Ill give him that. Uhhhno. I blushed a little, picturing him naked and kneeling before me, Justdo anything you like. Why do I keep repeating myself? I need to leave. As you wish. His voice made my toes tingle. Bye. I blushed like a five year old girl. Bye. He did his best voice of a five year old boy. I made myself walk and not look back. I didnt hear the door close until I was walking down the stairs, towards the front door that lead outside. Was he watching me walk away? God, he was looking at my ass, wasnt he? Here it comes. Holy SHIT, BELLA!! Alice got in first as we stepped out into the bright, warm afternoon, a busy city sidewalk filled with walking people, lined with stores and pizza places, shops. What is he doing there, doing your dishes? Rosalie butt in, loudly, Did you sleep with him last night? NO! I shouted, walking quickly, holding my strap protectively, He came this morning. Oh he came, huh? Alice teased, giggling in glee, walking on my left side as Rosalie was on my right. TSK. I frowned at her, Not like that, slob! He ARRIVED this morning. He agreed to be my subject and we had a little interview before you got there. He does interviews with no shirt on? Rosalie squinted at me, Then why did he say you were tired and he wasnt finished with you?! Ugh! I rolled my eyes, He was playing with you! He likes that. Thats how he is. Oh, look she knows him already! Alice giggled, That is so cute! He was kissing you! Rosalie reminded, We both heard it. Or are you going to tell us he was just giving you some oxygen for the next three hours in case you run out? Alice giggled. Maybe he was checking her teeth with his tongue! You guys are so gross! I looked both ways and crossed the street, hurrying as cars began to move towards us. We made it across alive, not even thinking twice about it, and the conversation kept going on.

We dont blame you, Bella. Alice said as we started up the quiet street towards campus, He is very hot and nice, but you yourself were the one to say that you shouldnt date a stripper. Oh my God, your Dad would absolutely murder you! Rosalie let out a laugh. I would LOVE to see that dinner happen. Were not dating. I was ready to confess, only to them. Come here. I motioned with my head, walking behind the side of a building where it was quiet and private. They were right with me as I leaned in and said in a low voice, You both have to swear to God you wont repeat what Im going to tell you. We swear! Alices tongue was on the ground. Rosalie. I looked at her sternly. Yes, I swear. She looked annoyed but interested. Okay. I took a breath, I paid him. To live in my apartment with me. And be my subject. For the next two weeks. And to be my toy. But I didnt tell them that part. OH JEEZ !! Alice smiled, jumping once up and down, her hands in her hair. No way! Rosalie looked a little impressed now and said, How much?! My inheritance. I admitted, looking down for a second. Twenty thousand DOLLARS?!! Alice almost screamed it. Will you shut up?! I winced, looking around us. Wait. Rosalie put up a perfectly manicured hand, Just to answer some of your questions, he is charging you twenty thousand dollars? You are so getting screwed. Alice piped up now, You shouldve called us to help you seal the deal. That is outrageous, Bella. Well, it turns out I swallowed, biting my bottom lip, He thought I was hiring him for something else. I guess I didnt explain it right, or he didnt hear me over the music that well or somethingbuthe thinks I hired him forsex. Rosalies and Alices mouths dropped open in unison and I cringed, waiting for what theyd say next. Well, say something! I finally ordered them, I kinda straightened it out a little with him this morning. He knows now that hes my subject for the thesis, but he also still thinks hes mytoy. TOY?! Rosalie almost turned bright red. Thats what he calls himself. I muttered sadly, feeling that sinking in my stomach again, remembering the pain he told me he had gone through at the hands of women. No wonder he couldnt trust us and felt so afraid to expose himself to me.

They were both laughing and I instantly became enraged. Dont LAUGH! I yelled, sneering at them, Dont you dare laugh at him! Im not laughing at him, Im laughing at YOU! Rosalie pointed out, You are in a lot of trouble. I know. What are you planning to do? Rosalie asked further, Sleep with him? No. I said, then, I dont KNOW! I grabbed at my long hair and pulled, my emotions all over the place. I felt tears sting my eyes. Well, if you do, youd better use condoms! Alice said, On the way home, youd better buy some large. She doesnt even know how to buy condoms. Rosalie glanced to Alice, then came back to me, We will help you, Bella. But realize this, you dont have any real experience at this. You have no idea what youre doing. Well, then, maybe he can teach me some things. I said, revealing that maybe I did want to play with Edward a little bit. Actually, a lot. Oh God, you ARE going to sleep with him. Alice covered her mouth with both hands. BELLA! Rosalies eyes lit up, Can we play with him, too? Alice leapt up, squealing while Rosalie was telling her to shut up so she could get my permission. No, no, no! I cringed, I dont think thats a good idea. I dont want to ask him to dothose kinds of things. Oh, he would do it. Rosalie frowned at me, frustrated now, Come on, you can ask him, at least. We have to go, were gonna be late! I avoided her questions and ran off towards class, hearing them trailing behind me, begging for a turn.

4. EPOV

After Bella left I looked around for things I could do for her. The place was immaculately clean already. She must have been doing that for me. Sweet girl. I already liked Bella a lot. She is shy and too smart for her own good. That must keep guys away, most men are intimidated by that. Not me. I saw Bella as a closed, tight rosebud. Lovely, fresh, newpart of me felt wicked for even accepting this job. I didnt want to spoil her or corrupt her with myself. But I wanted to free her, to make the rosebud bloom and openslowlydelicatelycarefully. She is so refreshingly different from most women Ive known.

College girl. Just like her, my girl. Also a smart one, all into books and school. And she blushes, too. My girl used to blush. Not the same way as Bella does, but it reminded me. Bella asked me to say her name today and I couldnt do it. I wanted to but my throat wouldnt work. I have never spoken to anyone about it, not ever. How weird is it that a girl would buy me for two weeks and want me to talk out all my problems of my past? Maybe its not a coincidence. I wanted to believe that somewhere, up there, someone might have sent Bella to me for a reason, to help me, to try and reach me. But there is no up there and there is no someone who would care about my pain or future. If there is, where have they been before now? If they wanted to help me now, they were too fucking late. I checked the time. 1:30 pm. I had to make my call at 3pm so I have a little time. I already called Victoria and told her I couldnt make it into the club tonight. Tonight was Bellas, our first night together. She looked so scared this morning when I took my shirt off. Poor little thing. Id have to be less abrupt than normal with this one. I knew that right away. I dont mind. It would be a nice change taking my time, seducing her, not rushing in. I couldnt remember the last time I got to move slowly with a woman. There is a lot to be said for going slow. Most women I work for dont see it but if done correctly, building up the anticipation, the mystery, the sensuality of exploring and taking small bites first aroused me a great deal. The longer I would have to wait for Bella, the more I would want her and delight when I could finally have her. She had told me she wasnt a virgin but she also said she did it once before and for33 seconds? Was that a joke? It sounded serious when she said it. If this is true, then she has not really made love before, or had sex, either for that matter. Not good sex, anyway. So I would treat her as if she were still a virgin, I decided. She deserved to start over again. I could be her real first time. I have been paid by mothers to give their daughters their first time. That part was always a little weird even to me, but most of those times, I had just serviced the mothers and had pleased them so much they wanted to give me as a gift to their daughters. No girls under 18, though. I still have a couple rules I havent broken of my own. The daughters never found out that I was paid to be with them. I had to play the part of being a man they bumped into at the Blockbuster, or set up on a date with her, a son of her mothers co-worker, some story that got me into their lives somehow. Buying me for their daughters was their way of ensuring safe sex, that I always practice, and sometimes to tear them away from some loser boyfriend that wasnt treating her properly. And also, to give them a wonderful and sensual first experience. Afterwards, I would have to have a very delicate conversation with the girl and make up some excuse for why I couldnt see her anymore. I could always say something like, I live in Cancun or Hawaii and have to go back home now. I had a million decent reasons that didnt hurt them and took me out of their lives quickly. But it always bothered me even days and weeks later. I always felt like I had hurt them in the end.

But the point is, I know how to be gentle and soft and slow. It made me happier than some of the rougher things I did with women. So this is how I would begin with Bella. And later, if she wanted to explore those darker fantasies, I could do that too. I can be angeland I can be demon, too. I ran out to the bank and made my deposit Bella had given me, swung by a couple more good food stores to get supplies for dinner, and some things from my place that I would need for tonight. I got back to Bellas place just in time to make my daily phone call and everything went well today in that respect. I checked over my schedule for tomorrow and saw I had a bachlorette party to dance at, only for about 2 hours at a private home. Id ask Bella later if she really wanted to go with me on these jobs. Flipping the page to Wednesday I saw 12pm Pizza Delivery Paige. Bella cant come to that job. Maybe shed have a class that day. I hoped. Nothing on Thursday good. Friday night Id have to be at Fire. Fridays were big nights there and Bella could come with her friends if she wanted. Then I turned the page and saw Saturday 1pm - Raven. Fuck. Raven was not her real name, I never knew her real name but Saturday would be a rough day for me. I would have to make something up so Bella wouldnt follow me along on that one. Sunday said Film 4pm. Jackies place. Thats a tough one. Im not sure if Bella would want to see me playing my part in a low budget sex film. Maybe I could try to get out of that one or change it to after I was finished with Bella. I put my book away and began to get things ready for my Bella when she got home. I was going to saut shrimp in oil and garlic and have angel hair pasta on the side with a nice loaf of French bread. I almost got wine but decided against that. Seeing Bellas fridge I could see she didnt normally drink. Only cokes and juices were there. And also I didnt want to make her think I was plying her with wine to seduce her easier. I wanted tonight to be just for touchingtalkingand getting to know each other, to break the ice a bit. I had no intentions of making love to her yet. We have time. Lots of it. I had some nice massage oils of mine from home sitting in a little bowl of hot water, warming up nicely. And I found some nice towels of Bellas and put a few in a basket near the bed. And yes, I did the rose petals on the bed, a few of my candles around the bedroom. I even put a pink light bulb in her lamp in the bedroom to create a soft glow of light. And I had my ipod set up in the bedroom, an entire playlist of mine already set up to play sensual, soft music perfect to relax to. I had created a young girls paradise here and was pretty proud of myself when I was finished.

The sun was still out but by the time we had finished eating dinner it would start to become dark. Then I could center myself on making Bella happy. I was wearing black jeans and no shirt, as my rule dictated when I heard her coming up the stairs. I hoped she was alone. My feet were always bare inside and even outside sometimes. I hated shoes. For the tenth time, I peeked at myself in the full length mirror on the back of Bellas bathroom door. Hair still sticking out in all directions, but not too messy. Nicely shaven, no stubble on my face, teeth good and clean, breath cinnamon flavored. Every thing as good as I could get it. I wish I could erase that damn bite mark on my ass. It was still there. But I couldnt help that right now. I went to my food on the stove and stirred it a little more, hoping she could smell it out in the hallway. Opening the door before Bella reached it surprised her. She was alone. I smiled warmly at her, not wanting to make her more tense. Hello, Dr. Bella. I greeted, wanting to see her smile. I leaned in and got a soft, small kiss. She did smile up at me and chuckled as I got back, letting her inside. She looks more nervous now than she did this morning. I would put her out of her misery in a few minutes but not yet. I liked seeing her squirm a little bit. I gently closed the door as she entered the kitchen. I was so scared youd be on your knees when I came in. Bella admitted, then saw the food and added, Ohhh God, that smells GREAT! I smelled that from downstairs but I didnt thinkthat was coming from my place. I am insulted. I said with a deep voice, I told you Im a good little toy. You doubted me? I took another slow kiss, taking her backpack off her shoulder, placing it in the corner of the living room. And I dont get on my knees until you tell me to. I informed, The one rule you gave me is being obeyed. I see that and Im glad. She said, Id hate to have to punish you. She blushed again as I laughed and spread a tablecloth out on the living room floor. Bella has a lot of potential. A rosebud dieing to bloom and show all her wonders. Were having dinner down here tonight. I informed, Ill set the table, dont worry. I began putting the food onto plates and getting the silverware. I laid everything out on the cloth on the floor. This would be much nicer, looking out the window seeing the sun going down instead of hunched over the little counter on stools. She looked very pleased about my idea and I offered her a seat across from me as I sat on the floor, my back resting on the sofa behind me. I had the music playing in the background very quietly so we could talk.

I poured two sodas into chilled glasses and set them down also on our picnic blanket. Bella sat Indian style on the floor and I had my legs laid out straight before me, my feet crossed. We began to eat and Bella confessed, I love shrimp. Its my favorite. Thank you so much for doing all this. You didnt have to, you know. Hush. I stopped her, I wanted to. Now eat. Yes sir. She joked, eating from her fork. Oooh, I liked that. Say it again. I teased her a little as she giggled, covering her mouth. Bella, can I say something before we go any further? I asked politely, wanting to set her mind at ease. She still looked so stiff and nervous. And now that I asked this she stared at me, frozen. Sure, she said, tense now. After we talked earlier, I began, smiling tenderly, I realized that all this is very new to you, like you said. So I want you to know. Tonight I have some things planned, but its not about having sex. I want us to take our time and get to know each other tonight. I want to touch you and I want you to touch me. I want to talk to you and kiss you. I want to hold you and massage every inch of you and then I want you to massage me. And I want us to fall asleep together, wrapped up in each other. But I will not push you into having sex with me tonight. I want you to tell me when you want me. And then I will be glad to ravage you. I dont want you to be afraid of me, or nervous. Does all of this sound good to you? She looked up at me and had tears in her eyes. I didnt move. For a few seconds, she was silent and then she exhaled a long breath. Her voice cracked but she said, That sounds perfect. And she smiled this amazing smile I had never seen on her before. She liked my plan for tonight! I was so relieved and glad I had read her correctly. She was very difficult for me to read. This one important time I had gotten it right. My goddess was pleased with me. And I felt my chest loosen and relax. I gave her a big smile back, excited about what tonight would hold. I was almost too excited to finish eating.

EPOV After her last bite of shrimp was gone and the bread was a faint memory, I picked up all the dishes, letting them soak in the sink until tomorrow. When I returned a few minutes later, I reached my hands down to her. She looked up at me shyly and gave her hands to me. I brought her to her feet and asked, May I kiss you, Bella?

She seemed a lot more relaxed now after I had made my statement earlier, I was so glad it put her at ease. Nodding at me, she blushed a little bit then. I kissed her slowly, not going too hard as I sometimes tend to do. I placed lots of little baby kisses on her mouth and her lips were responding in kind to me. Slowly, I was dancing with her, my feet moving her around ever so slowly in a small circle. I am yours, Bella. I closed my eyes and whispered, There is no wrong for us. Anything you wantis yours. Never be afraid of me. I will never deny youanything. Her eyes were closed now, too and she let my words float into her ears, not answering yet. I waited a few more minutes and then I asked, Would you like to take a shower with me? She smiled up at me and I knew her answer was yes. Come, Bella. I led her towards the bathroom, backing myself to the door, biting my bottom lip as I kept my eyes on her innocent face. She instructed me once inside how to work the water and the lever to raise to make the shower spray. Her shower had glass see through doors, the glass blurred so anyone looking in from outside wouldnt see every detail of the one showering. The shower water running hot behind us, I wore a sexual little smile as I began to undress my Bella. She looked a little afraid but she tried to hide it. I kissed her again to calm her and whispered, Dont be afraid, Bella. I meant what I said. I will go slow. Thank you, Edward. She kissed me back, sounding braver now, her hands reached up and grabbed the back of my hair, her kisses increasing in desire. Youre very welcome. I tried to say between her large kisses, my fingers slowly moving her green sweater up her stomach, taking my time. She let out a little moan that sounded pleased to me. I lifted the sweater up past her breasts, a white bra cupping them nicely into a heart shaped cleavage. Finally, I lifted the sweater up over her head, letting her small hands slip out of the sleeves as I peeled it completely off of her body, placing it down on the counter behind me. Youre so gorgeous, Bella. I said, still kissing her, breathlessly as I tried to keep up with her rough kisses now. Shed have to stop this if she didnt want me to take her right in the shower. You shouldnt cover yourself up with sweaters. I added, taking my lips away from her hungry mouth, moving them to her shoulder, kissing them softly as I moved the bra straps down and unhooked the bra at her back, having no trouble there.

She gave another sexy moan as the bra hit the floor. I took my time and kissed down her creamy little neck, coming to my knees as I placed kisses over every inch of her. I did not go right after her breasts, as most men might do. I took my time getting there. I circled her wrists with my hands, holding them at her sides, almost in a restraining way, to keep her still while I covered every peak and valley from her shoulders to her belly button, licking my tongue inside the little hole there, getting more sighs of pleasure from her. I would get back to this later, but now I wanted her in the shower with me. I opened her jeans while I was on my knees before her, unzipping and gently pulling them down to her ankles, and then her panties, too. I stood up and held her hand as she yanked her feet out, now completely naked for me. My eyes liked what they saw and I quickly got out of my own jeans, wearing no underwear. She went in the shower first and I was right behind her. I loved the slight burn of the hot water on my skin and I ran my fingers back through her long, thick curls, watching the water wet and soften it, soon making it a nice, slicked back almost ebony plait. I kissed her chin and mouth, nose, closed eyelids, forehead, down her cheekbones. I let her stand under the showering hot water while I slightly shivered just out of its reach. I was adoring my goddess, worshipping her every where, not missing the most insignificant area. I moved my hands down her neck and then lower, stroking her breasts softly as she let her mouth open slightly, her breathing hard and fast, enjoying the sensations of water and fingers, palmskneading gently, not groping. How does this feel, Bella? I asked in a whisper, my own hair becoming wet now. God. She panted, So good. Dont stop, please Your wish is my command. I purred playfully, moving my hands down her ribs, finding her nice ass cheeks, my hands squeezing lightly, circling with my palms. Can I touchBella? I put my hand cautiously between her legs, stroking ever so gently, not making any moves to insert fingers yet. Yes, Edward. She peeked at me and then closed her eyes again. I smoothed the little bit of hair there down, the hot water darkening it as well. I want to wash you. I told her without hesitation, taking one of her bath sponges and pouring some of her body wash into it. She trembled a little bit as I began, turning her back to me and stroking her wet hair aside. I kissed the skin of her back, soaping in wide circles after each kiss with the sponge, my other hand softly moving the suds down her body. Her voice hummed in response, telling me I was doing well. I used my hand to glide the bubbles down Bellas white little ass, resisting the urge to slide my fingers down into the crease of it. No, I did not want to frighten my goddess. I was here to serve her, not myself.

Kneeling down, I slowly washed down her smooth, shiny legs. Hmm, someone had shaved recently, I smiled to myself. I slowly moved her legs around so shed face me now, continuing my lathering into my right hand. I lifted each foot carefully, letting her hold onto my shoulders for support while I washed her feet, loving her little toes. I leaned in and placed a kiss on her foot and she gave a little gasp. No, Edward, you dont have to kiss my feet. She whispered, looking a little sad. Yes, Bella. I agreed with her,(never argue with your goddess), Im sorry. Dont be. She smiled sweetly down at me, stroking my wet hair, You are so wonderful. I never had anyone wash me before. I smiled up at her and said in a low voice, Youve been neglected, Bella. But Im here now. I moved my hands up the front of her legs, over her bony little knees and up her thighs. Slowly and carefully, I stroked my hand between her legs, making them open slightly. I sponged and soaped and washed the bubbles out of her little tuft of pubic hair and placed a small kiss there, but I did not linger there for very long. Later. Showers were good for washing and touching, but despite the romance novels, a shower is not a good place to have any kind of sexual activity. Especially if you use soap and shampoo. No friction between skin is a big problem and most times, 20 minutes is all the hot water you have in a shower. Its an awful feeling to be making love to a woman in sudden cold water. Safety is also a big concern. A shower is a good place to begin the evening, but I preferred not to fuck in there, even if I had planned on having Bella tonight. Rising to my feet again, I continued stroking the white strawberry suds over her. Soaping up her stomach, then up her ribs, peppering more soft kisses there after their washing, I moved up to her breasts. I gave them a nice, sensual, methodical wash, not pinching nipples or biting yet. I reached for the shampoo, not finished with her yet. This one? I asked her with a grin. I chose the strawberry shampoo, to match the body wash. It seems she likes strawberry. She giggled and nodded and I could already feel as if a big weight had been lifted between us. I didnt notice if she was looking at my body at all but that would also come later. Before the end of the night, she would see and feel every inch of me and I hoped her nervousness would fade a little bit from now on. Come here you. I kissed her nose and moved her head back, turning her a bit so the water didnt run down her hair anymore. I got my fingers in there and massaged her scalp as I lathered the shampoo. Uuuhhhh God. She moaned and closed her eyes while I used both hands, using all my energy and giving my every attention to her. I love your hair, Bella. I kissed her mouth again, moving her quickly back into the hot caressing fingers of the shower. My fingers slowly worked the shampoo out of her thick, wet hair, my lips not releasing hers yet.

Mmmmm, so warm I couldnt pull my lips away and I didnt want to. Then I felt her lips break away slowly and she actually grabbed my shoulders, pulling me down towards her so she could kiss my neck. I felt teeth and soft nibbles and tongue. Yes, Bella wants to be a sexual being, I was aware of that since she flung her arms around me at the club in the dressing room. And before I go, she will be. I didnt want to make her into a slut, I just wanted her to be free to do what she desired and stop being so closed and afraid to act on those desires. There is another Bella inside, trapped, clawing to get out. I will free you, Bella, dont be afraid. Bella I moaned now, loving what she was doing to my neck, her little short fingernails digging slightly into my big shoulders. Then she moved me so I was standing under the pouring hot water. I had to admit it did feel sooo good to feel the heat and become wet before her. Your turn. She whispered, roughly spinning me with my back to her now. My lips smiled involuntarily. I like this. She kissed my back, her fingers moving over it, exploring every line and curve, just as I had done for her. She reached up and intertwined her fingers into my hair, pulling my head back a little until I was almost looking up. She wasnt rough with me, still sweet but firm. The water ran down my throat as she held my face back this way and I could feel her other hand moving under my arm, on my chest, moving in small little circles. I moved my hands behind me, moving them up and down the sides of her legs, unable to stop touching her. God, your body is so beautiful she purred sexily into my ear now, Especially wet. I let out a breath, smiling. Maybe this rosebud would bloom quicker than I imagined. So is yours, Bella. Lets see how nice you look with soap suds all over you. She hugged me from behind, her breasts pressing into my warm wet back. Yes, Bella. I agreed again, smiling more. She washed me all over, just as I had done to her. Bella is smart and a fast learner. I liked being her teacher. Every bit as thorough as I was, even more gentle than I had been with her, she amazed me and I could not remember a time when I was so pampered as I was by her tonight. When I felt soap suds dancing over my ass and her hand was stroking them away, I felt something I didnt expect. She kissed the bite mark that was still embedded there. Something inside me tightened and I actually felt little tears come to my eyes. I blinked them away and thank God we were in the shower and that my back was to her. She didnt see. But I had felt her, caring for me again. And I had to admit to myself at least, it was a monumentally beautiful feeling for me.

She finished washing and shampooing me, avoiding my penis as much as she could without insulting me. I just grinned at that. Bella was still wrapped in her shy girl paper and that was okay for now. I would be tearing off that paper soon enough. I got out of the shower first, all the hot water gone, and grabbed her towel from the bar on the wall. Wrapping her up in it, I towel dried her hair, moved down her face, her neck, shoulders, under her arms, tickling her a little. I again took my sweet time drying every inch of skin, placing small wet kisses upon every thing I had just dried off. Her breathing became deep and heavy and when I peeked up at her face her eyes were closed happily, her lips smiling as she let herself enjoy it. I gave her cute little ass a vigorous towel massage as she giggled and tried to escape me but I wasnt having it. Finally, I wrapped the towel around her dry body and kissed her lips, my own body still naked and damp. After I kissed her, I told her to go into our bedroom. I used the word our hoping that pleased her. I told her to go into our bedroom and lay down on the bed, on the towels. She went without a word, smiling as I quickly dried myself off and set off after her. I found her laying there, completely naked and looking content. Edward she cooed, You made my room look so beautiful She referred to the candles, the pink light, the rose petals, the opera music playing low nearby but it was nothing compared to her body being completely exposed to me, and her not being afraid or nervous anymore. It was a lovely sight to behold. Shhh. I sat on the bed at her side, laying my finger lightly over her lips, The only beautiful thing here is you. And Im not finished with you yet. Roll over, little girl. Her wet, tussled hair looked so black and wild as I crawled over to her, starting my erotic massage as she laid there, face laying on her pillow, her eyes closing. Thats it, relax. I said in my soothing voice, moving so I was sitting on my knees between her now parted legs. I used my warmed up oils and lotions, working my trained hands up and down the entire length of her legs first, one at a time. Up and down, my thumb in the center of her leg, firmly pressing and sliding down along the hot thickness of the oils. I worked the bottoms of her feet, too, going terribly slow as she moaned and breathed slower, not moving at all as I worked. After her feet were good and limp, I began moving my oiled hands up and down her legs a little higher, beginning to let my hands travel inches up over the bottoms of her ass cheeks, just barely crossing that line enough for her to notice. Oooohhhhh. She breathed, letting me touch her as I wanted, not resisting me but enjoying me again. I felt my lips smile a bit but I kept my eyes on what I was doing, determined to give her the best massage of her life, one shed never forget. I love touching you, Bella. I shared softly, Your skin is perfect.

Oh my God she barely whispered, almost to herself. Now I was working my lubed hot hands in wonderful wide circles, one hand on each ass cheek, circling into it and then gliding with ease down the center, down the little crevice there, over and overslowlypainfully slowly, making it last forever. I could feel my cock hardening but I tried to ignore it. No, I told it mentally, no sex tonight. Go take a night off, willya? Go see a movie or something. Leave me alone, you insatiable thing. I moved my hands together on each ass cheek, one coming from under it, the other coming down from the top, meeting in the middle and giving a firm kneading on each meeting. I repeated this on the other little ass cheek, getting lots of happy sounds from my goddess. Then I put one hand on the bottom of each ass cheek and slowly, very slowly pushed upwards, making her skin a wave, a small ripple moving gradually. I kept moving my hands up over her ass and now firmly and crawling slower going up the bottom of her spine, brining this hot wet wave up her back now. As I did this, I laid my bare chest slightly onto the backs of her thighs, then resting my pecks on her round little ass, letting her feel my flesh against hers. My palms moved all the way up her back, my arms almost together as they reached up, straight and long as my eyes closed, my lips moving one inch down and finding her there. The musky scent of the oil inhaled into my nostrils as I placed a deep wet kiss right over the crack in her ass. Right upon that kiss, I took a soft lick, kissing again. My body moved up a bit, my fingers massaging deeper into the slick oils as my mouth embedded another longer kiss on the bottom of her spine next, my chest now fully laying against her tight little cheeks. I wasnt kneeling between her legs anymore, now I was laying there, on her body, my legs now straddling her as her own legs straightened and laid closed slightly within mine, almost trapped by me. She was going nowhere. Her noises were constant and aroused little utterances that drove me further, loving it when I pleased my owner. Nothing gave me more pleasure than making them all happy with me, only me. My hands moved along the sides of Bellas body, and I exacted a few giggles out of her, tickling her a little bit. I let my breath do a little massaging of its own along her back in between the kisses I was raining down upon her spine and shoulder blades. 33 secondsI thought to myself. What buffoon did she let in her bed? Hell, it took me longer than 33 seconds to just undress the little college goddess. Poor Bella, having to endure a boys version of lovemaking. Well, hopefully after me, she would know what real sex was and wasnt and what a man is, versus what a boy is. Edwarddddd. She started breathing my name between her moans and heavy exhales of breath. I love that. I love her saying my name. I could listen to it forever. I was sliding my hands under her arms, slowly moving a bit underneath her breasts, then back towards the center of her back, just barely touching the sides of her breasts as I spread the oil around generously.

Feelllssssoooogoooood, Edddwaarrrrdddd. She growled, her breathing slower and deeper. Her body was responding very well to my hands and lips. I love pleasing you, Bella. I love it so much. I spoke softly, kissing the center of her back, laying my cheek there for a moment as my hands kept dipping under her, lingering for too briefly on her breasts then moving up their sides, gone too soon from her. My words excited her even more and she let out a deeper groan, her hands almost making little fists over her wet head. Relax those hands, Bella. I almost ordered her, then I made my voice soft again, Unclench the fistsgood girl. Let the fingers relaxyessssforget everythingexcept my handsand my lipsI added, kissing a spot on the side of her, near the right breast as she sighed deeply, her body trembling a tiny bit. She made a little high pitched squeak sigh and I kept kissing around this area. Not well known, this little valley, but very erotic. I moved Bellas body on its side slightly, moving her arm up and diving in for slow, sensual kisses under her arm, down the sides of her breasts, along the ribcage. Oh GOD! she was almost screaming as my fingers held her wrist captive, not letting her squirm out. My legs curled protectively around hers, encoiling them as her body shuddered with hot waves of pleasure. I took a couple small soft bites against her ribs, getting a loud gasp as a response. Like I said, this area was very sensitive and very stimulating. I loved coming here. Every woman loved it and was surprised at their own reactions when I explored there. You must move carefully, gently, and slowlyextremely slowlywhen awakening a goddess. Especially awakening her for the first time in her life, after twenty years. Bellas back was all conquered territory now and slick and shiny with hot oil. I lifted my body up and gave her a sensual, tender roll onto her back now, smiling wickedly down into those angelic brown eyes, shiny and wet also as she stared up at me, speechless. Her breasts were rising and falling with each breath she took and I gave her an unspoken, loving smile, the back of my hand moving along each cheekbone, my fingers curling around and closing the goddesses gorgeous eyes. Relax, Bella, enjoy. I am still not finished with you yet. I had to smile when I moved my hands down to her ankles now instead of going right for her breasts. She made this little annoyed growl, peeking at me as I began to make circles on the inner anklebones of her feet. I gave a little laugh, resisting the urge to tease her a little bit verbally about her wanting my hands on her breasts. I didnt want to make jokes to her tonight, I wanted her to know true pleasure, loving touch, and gentle arousal. I took more oil into my hands and went up her legs, as I did with the backs of them, as I made my way up to her thighs, I slowly parted them, slicking my fingers firmly up and down, my touch almost going to her waiting little crotch, but not. I repeated this motion over and over and over again, driving her right to the edge, but not going over it.

Her breathing was picking up, quickening, the desire building up more the longer I teased her. She kept waiting for my touch between her legs, but I just kept moving my fingers into the creases of her inner thighs then out again. I wondered how long I could keep this up before she started screaming at me. My penis was completely raging and hard but I ignored it again, digging my fingers in a little bit harder, moving up and down the sides of her little dark haired pussy. I saw her eyes clench a bit and she began panting, whimpering now. Breathe, Bella. I purred, not letting her know I was paying any attention to her noises at the moment. Pleaseplease she kept whispering. I just smiled to myself, not crossing the line, just dancing right along its edges. Her legs were tensing and stretching, writhing between mine. Stop, Bella. I gave her a stern warning voice, You are ruining all my hard work with your squirming. Hold still. I am a little stinker. I laughed to myself. She tried to hold still and relax but I knew I was making it almost impossible for her. I began to massage the stomach area and pelvis right above her clit, but ignoring it completely. Her little fists clenched the pillow her head was laying on and I nearly laughed. Someone is beginning to awakenlittle goddess Bellayouve slept long enough, dont you think, sweetheart? Stubborn little thing, she still wont ask for it. I told her whatever she wants, all she has to do is ask me. But its so hard for her. I would make her ask me, order me even. I moved my oiled hands up her ribs again, working them in and out, making a wing shaped design in the oils. Up along the ribs, swoop down into her torso, then pelvis, almost touching her pussybut not. Then back up, and down again, very slow More whimpering from goddess Bellapoor little thing she is resisting me. She will not win. Trying so hard to be a good little girl. Sex is not dirty and orgasms are not a crime. Come on, Bella, let go. God, shes so aroused I can smell it Alright, my final plateauthe breasts and neck. My fingers got more oil and began to make firm circles around both breasts, one hand on each. GOD! she shouted, licking her lips, her eyes trying to stay closed. Hes not heretry again, Bella. I moved my warm wet hands up and down her breasts, kneading them firmly and working them up and down, in slow little circles. I bent my head down and gave her little pink nipples wet licks, circular, then back around the other way. Onethen back to the other. My erection was touching her stomach and Im sure she could feel it but she had other things to focus on right now.

I sucked her right nipple into my wet mouth first, sucking. Wet. Releasing it. Making my oiled hands make the wing pattern up along the sides of her neck, then swooping back down, coming over her breasts. Then back upand down again. Overand over.and over. Edward! she gasped and whimpered now. Yes, Bella? I acted like I was unaware of her dilemma. It feels so good.feels so goodwhat she panted, opening her eyes a bit at me. Poor little thing. She doesnt have a clue whats happening. I am so evil. Does it? I smiled, my hands back in her thighs, in and out, just barely touching the dark hair therebut not. UUUHHHHH she arched her back, growling even louder now. She almost sounded as if she were about to cry. But I didnt stop. I began moving my wicked fingers under her, digging into her ass cheeks, then curling back into her inner thighs, down past the crotch area, then back again. Over and over again. Horribly slowly. My fingers like sharp claws now. Almost ready. Her body is right at the brink. Edward, please! she begged, her legs writhing again, Pleaseoh GodGOD! Would you like me to make you come, Bella? I made it easy for her this one time. YES!! she screeched, YES, PLEASE YES!! Are you sure? I teased, almost laughing. Her eyes opened, so wide and crazed it almost scared me. YES IM SURE EDWARD!! she hollered now, PLEASE!! PLEASE!! IM DYING!! At that I had to give a little chuckle. The goddess WANTS to wake up nowbadly. As you wish. I purred, moving my hot oily fingers to her pussy lips, giving them the same slow massaging I did to the rest of her. Hold on, Bella, I thought internally as she whimpered and cried out a little more. Her pussy was soaking wet and hot. Wow, she really was enjoying my massage! I laid down on my stomach and licked my lips, holding her legs apart with my hands on her thighs, shoving them as far open as they would go. Her voice was grunting and whimpering louder as she peeked down at me, her eyes frightened and curious at the same time. Dont be afraid Bellayoull love this. My tongue worked well at this task. It was sure and strong and very wet as it moved up those moist strawberry lips of hers. I lapped up all the sweet juice I could find and hummed my vibrations of thanks into her quivering weak pussy.

MMMMMMMM is a great thing to do while youre swirling your tongue in and out of a tight little mound of flesh such as this one. She screamed out loud now, staring blankly at the ceiling as I closed my mouth over and over again over her little pink clit now, then moving my heavy tongue so fast over it from side to side, then up and downthen in circles, wet, hot circles. I have tons of different tricks my tongue can do. I did them all. Ohhhh FUCK!! little innocent Bella screamed, pounding her fists wildly into the pillow her head laid on. GodGodGodEdwardEdwardEdward. She kept gasping and panting and screaming. Uh oh. Its me VS. God again. I win this little battle every time. Sorry God. You made the instrument, Im just playing the song. I am so going to hell someday. Well, if I am, Im just going to do what I want then and let the chips fall where they may. I didnt use my fingers here yet, I wanted her to come from my tongue alone. I was licking and sucking and kissing, twirling my tongue, lapping Then I started to work my tongue in along the folds inside, along the sides of her clit. AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! she suddenly squealed. Eureka ! I feel like Lewis and Clark every time I discover where the treasure is. EDWARD!! she screamed like a wild animal now, bucking and thrashing up and down while I pinned her down, not stopping no matter what she said. EDWARDEDWARD, Edward!! she kept screeching. I won. I pictured God and me arm wrestling and I just slammed his white robed arm down HARD! I kept licking in the area I had discovered and her screams grew louder and louder. Finally, her legs tensed and began jerking uncontrollably as I kept holding them apart. It was happening. Then she was growling like a savage again, and I could taste heavy juices oozing from inside her. Screamsno words only unintelligible wild screams. MMMMMMM!! I moaned so loudly I even put her screams to shame. I didnt move my lips and tongue away until she had full orgasm and had already started to come down a bit from it all. She was panting, her breasts heaving in and out as I finally released her swollen clit from my mouth and began to crawl up beside her, laying my head on her stomach, just stroking her.inhaling her scentone of the best scents I had ever smelled before and I wasnt just saying that, either. It was true. My fingers played, making small little designs on her white flesh as her fingers found their way into my hair, clutching it in appreciation as I smiled, kissing her skin where I was laying. I waited for her to regain the ability of speech again, and I now had two fingers moving dizzily around her flat stomach.

Finally, she laughed, tickled by my touch. What are you doing there? she couldnt see me but she could feel it. Mice. I informed. Mice? she sounded out of it, and rightfully so. Yes. I said, Two little mice, ice skating on your stomach. I began making music with my voice to accompany the ice skating routine they were doing across Bellas stomach as she laughed. Mice Olympics! I announced playfully as she laughed harder while I tickled her ribs a little bit. No, stop, please she asked so I stopped, kissing her belly button, laying my head back down next to it. Edward she breathed, then stopped and said, poking my back, Turn around, I want to see your face. Wow, one orgasm and youre so demanding suddenly. I smiled, rolling over and laying my face on her stomach, looking at her face now. Edward. She said so softly it wasnt even a whisper and her fingers moved across my forehead, down my eyes, over my nose and along my cheekbones, as if she were blind and reading my face with such affection. I kissed her fingers as they glided past my mouth, wanting more of her already. Then my eyes turned up into hers and there were tears in them. Bella, whats wrong? I felt scared and almost sat up but she smiled at me and looked so beautiful I almost couldnt move. Nothing, Edward. She breathed, That was the mostI cant even find a word big enoughto describe how incredible you made me feel. I was on fire, and burning, only it felt so goodand so agonizing at the same timeand then when youOh my God I gave a small laugh and smile, relieved that she was alright. I laced my fingers through hers and closed my eyes, still resting my cheek on her hot, shiny stomach, wanting to spend the night right here. I brought her hand to my lips and gave it a deep, strong kiss. So I take it to mean that you enjoyed it, then? I smiled more, looking up and seeing the under side of her breast and playfully leapt up a bit, trying to nip at it. Sex is fun. I wanted her to know that, too. Laughter and sex go together very well. As long as the woman is not laughing at you while youre trying to have it with her, that is. Oh my God, yes I enjoyed it! she answered, DUH! I think I was almost coming while you were still massaging me! I closed my eyes for a second and smiled contentedly, perfectly happy that I was able to make her first orgasm a great experience. Do you know whats even better than your first orgasm? I asked her.

What? she asked, not having a clue but sounding very curious to know. I opened my eyes and got on all fours over her body as she giggled, my lips kissing hers for a quiet moment. What? she repeated. The second orgasm! I informed with a wicked glint in my eyes, forcing her thighs apart again, and closing my lips over her clit again as she screamed out, her eyes wild and gaping open once more.

BPOV I cant believe you I slurred my speech a little as he laid in my arms, his cheek right above my bare breast, Seven.seven orgasms in a row.my legs are like jello! I knew youd be multi-orgasmic. Edward sounded like his lips were smiling but all I could see was his strands of wild hair below my face. I kissed his head, truly trying to emit deep love into that kiss. You are way too passionate to only come once. He informed, sounding a little tired. Passionate? I tingled at his word. Very much so. He said without hesitation. I felt high and I loved the way it felt. We had not had sexbut I had experienced orgasm. Seven times. And damn it, I loved every single one of them! I never knew it could feel THAT good. What Ive been missing all this time! If it wasnt for EdwardId probably never have felt it. Jesus Christ, but he is talented ! You touched me everywhere I purred to him as I felt his tongue lick my breast where he was laying. Yes, I know. He took my nipple into his mouth, lightly sucking it. I think I can see stars! Holy shit! Just wait until Im inside you. He murmured, sucking on my other nipple now. Oh sweet Lord. You mean it will feel better than this?! We laid there for a little while after that, talking about nothing important. He was good at making me laugh and he never stopped touching me or kissing me or licking me. I really felt like he truly desired me and could not get enough of me. But hes paid to be this way. I almost felt a tear come to my eyes but I pushed it away, not thinking about anything that would bring me down tonight. We laid there in silence for a few minutes and then Edward rolled over onto his back beside me on the big bed, saying, I want you to touch me now, Bella. I felt afraid now as his angelic eyes found mine. His body was completely nude and laying right here, waiting for me and I knew I could not do to his body what he had done to mine. He would be so disappointed.

I dont know how to do that fantastic massage thing you did to meI wish I did! I confessed. Its alright, I dont want all that. He said calmly, his hand stroking the back of my hair, I just want you to touch meany way you want, for your pleasure, not mine. I want you to know my body. Explore me. He smiled and closed his eyes, waiting. He rested his arms at his sides and was as still as a statue. A very perfect and lovely statue. Smiling to myself, I couldnt deny my hands wanted to go roaming in Edwardville. What if disappoint you? I heard my insecure voice ask in a little sqeak. His eyes opened and were fierce now. You could never disappoint me, Bella. He stated flatly, Dont ever say that again. Then he came up and took my face in one hand, kissing me deeply and touching his tongue to mine until I forgot my name again. So I began touching him. I just did what came naturally to me and began with his sweet face, moving down to that muscular, thick neck. I couldnt help but kiss everything I was touching. He just laid there and closed his eyes, a pleasant look there as I crawled closer to him, taking a chance and straddling him, sitting my naked bottom on his waist. Mmmmmm. He smiled, not peeking, I like where this is going. He almost reached for my waist but he made his hands stop and go back up to rest near his head, his hands relaxed and open. I felt proud I had the guts to sit on him like this and that he did not object. I moved my shivering fingers over his pecks, intimidated by how flawless they were. This is why you need to touch me, Bella. He kept his eyes closed, Youve never really touched a man like this, have you? Then he opened them and looked into my eyes, not trying to make me feel nave or inexperienced, but as if he wanted to teach me what he knew. Not really. I admitted honestly. Well then touch away. He closed his eyes, When your hands stop shaking, then I will touch you some more. Oh GodI dont think I can take much more of that. My crotch is throbbing as we speak. I think if a breeze blew on it, I would come againor scream. So for the next hour, my hands touched him and caressed him. My lips covered him. I had taken my time and explored Edwards chest, his arms, his hands, his legs and adorable feet. I avoided the crotch area for now and rolled him over without a word, moving up the backs of his legs and deciding to be brave, I put my hands on his sweet perfect ass. Oh God. Im an ass girl.

Wow I couldnt help but breathe out, moving my hands along its lovely slope, playing my fingers along the little dimples, even being brave enough to squeeze the firm round flesh there. Oh my God, Bella. He moaned, You have great hands. Wow, I was turning him on? Cool ! Look at me, Bella Swan, playing with a mans butt. And not just any mans butt, but this heavenly piece of sexy right here before me. Dont stop, keep going his voice sounded so sleepy and dreamy, Ohyea. I love it when you grab hard like that. I had to stop after awhile so I didnt creep myself out but I had to admit, after touching Edward any way I wanted and for doing it for so long, I didnt feel so scared about it anymore. He made me feel so alright with it, because he was so comfortable with it, too. I didnt feel dirty or perverted like I thought I would. I just feltgoodand free. I was kissing down his back, my hand softly rubbing carefully over the huge bite mark on his right cheek, wishing my fingers could rub enough care into it so it would vanish and heal. I thought Edward might have fallen asleep because he was so quiet but then he slowly rolled over and took my hand, kissing it. Lesson is not over yet, Bella. Edward reluctantly informed, You chickened out on this. And he brought my hand to his penis and I tensed involuntarily, hardly able to look down at it. Bellababyrelax he said with a calming tone of voice, Shhhits only skin. Dont be afraid. Its just a part of me, like my arm or foot. Yea, right. Ill help youtrust me. He guided me patiently, moving my hand slowly over the erect, hardness there. Right now, hes very hard, thanks to you. He smiled, wincing a little bit as he curled my fingers gently around it, Come on, Bella, you can look at it. It doesnt bite He began telling me all about his penis and I almost laughed. I was shown the shaft, the head, the balls. Again, the more I looked and let myself touch and hearthe less scary it felt for me. I was afraid he wanted me to do things to his penis but he said no, not tonight. He told me tonight was just for me, not him. He wanted me to feel comfortable and unafraid with himand by the time we began to get sleepy, I was. I always sleep naked, Bella. Edward said carefully as we began to get under the covers, both completely nude and very happy about it, Is that okay with you? Yes, very. I replied, getting his smile, I think from now on, I will, too. He laid on his side, looking at me as I laid on my side, staring back at him as he took my hands into his, kissing my fingers little baby kisses at a time.

I am really happy about tonight. Edward said with his bedroom voice, his smoldering eyes dancing over my face, Have I made you happy, Bella? Yes. I almost said it too loudly, I feelso(I exhaled a breath)alive. I never knew it could be this wonderful. I felt tears rimming my eyes but I didnt care about hiding anything anymore. I let them be there and added, Thank you so much, Edward. He smiled back at me, his chin creasing a bit as he held me close, gently rocking me a little, It was all my pleasure, Bella. I love belonging to you. My eyes closed and I let a tiny little tear escape. Wiping it without him seeing, I sniffed and laid myself back onto my pillow, beside him. Can I hold you until you fall asleep? he asked, whispering it. My lips smiled happily, as if I would mind that. I would love that. I confessed with the same small whisper. Yay. He sounded very happy about this and said he loves the spoon position. I didnt know what that was. He laughed, showing me. He rolled me over, on my side, facing away from him and he curled his body right up along mine, behind me, his arm curled protectively over my bare waist, under the quilt, his fingers resting along my belly button area. I could feel his naked skin on mine and couldnt deny the heat emitting from his body into mine. His lips kissed my back and he straightened, laying his head on his pillow, and then I felt his chest against my back. God, that feels so good. His nose is in my hair. The sensual opera music played on and in the still blackness, I began to drift off, lulled to sleep by the sound of his breathing and the glorious way his pecks would rise and fall against my back.

5 BPOV I was sitting at my little kitchen counter, writing in my notebook at 8am the next morning. Sleeping with Edward last night had not been the least little bit awkward and that was all because of him. He didnt smother me all night in the bed and for that I was glad. Once I had drifted off to sleep, he rolled over and took his side of the large bed, letting me sleep undisturbed. So I actually did get some sleep, and I was thankful for that. I think I was the first one to open my eyes when the alarm clock went off this morning at 7:30 am. I quickly hit the snooze button at the horrid buzzing sound and then I rolled onto my back, peeking over at Edward, hoping it didnt disturb him. I nearly gasped at how beautiful he was asleep. I didnt even look at his chiseled chest yet. It was his face that captured me. His lips were drawn up in a little pout that reminded me of a little child, stubborn but sweet. His mouth was so perfect and the lips were so full and soft looking it made me want to kiss him all the time.

And his eyes closed drew me in even more. Look at those eyelashes, theyre longer than mine! Black in color, so noticeable against his very fair skin, if you looked very fast it almost looked like he wore eyeliner but now in the sun, this close, I could see, even along his bottom eyelid, those amazing lashes. I almost reached out to touch them but decided against that. Edward would just love to wake up being poked in the eye by me, Im sure. I smiled, seeing a little stubble on his face and wondered what hed look like with three days worth of it, his hair longer, to his shoulders. Yes, I already know I have a fascination with the bad boy types. I have analyzed myself for years, using my own brain as a subject. Now was my first time doing it to someone else. I was already mad at myself for messing this up. I was close to Edward, too close, already. How can I ask him things about his life or his work and then lay down underneath him at night and not think of the things hed said? I love belonging to you. Why did that make me feel happy and sad at the same time? Smiling at him, I looked at him a few minutes longer. I love the way his arms were drawn up under his face, hugging the quilt to himself, turned towards my side, as if he were looking at the back of my head when he fell asleep. Maybe thats just my own wishful thinking. Hugging himself. The way he sleeps said a lot about his mind. I wonder if hes ever been really held, without being naked or after sexual intercourse. Probably not for a very long time, if at all. I know there are always two sides to every story but I found myself hating his mother. I can see a father being hard and cold but his mother is supposed to love him, nurture him, teach him love. And he is her only child. How could she not love that face? And Ill bet when he was little he was 10,000 times more adorable. I wonder what his voice sounded like back then. And then I imagined a little Edward trying to get his mothers attention and her blowing him off. I wanted to track her down and just slap her. I know, I sound like a typical shrink, blaming Mommy right away. Switching gears, I remembered nicer things Last night had been so amazing, I was still feeling good even now. My crotch felt much better now, not so super sensitive and not even a little sore, as it was last night. No, nowit just felt extremely happy and I think if it couldve given a deep happy sigh, it would have. I love his eyebrows. They look shaped, as if he does something to make the corner such a sharp point like that. Staring at them now, I marveled at how dark they were in comparison to his skin and hair color. I would think his eyebrows would match his hair, a bronze-ish color. I wonder if he dyes his hair or has it done. Its possible, hes in the entertainment industry. Oh man, listen to me. I make him sound like a corporate mogul. I wanted to lean over and kiss that cute little mouth he was wearing now, but Im sure I have morning breath. And we ate shrimp and garlic last night. YIKES! I held my hand over my mouth and turned away from him a little. I have to hide a little toothbrush and glass of water with a basin under my side of the bed from

now on. A makeup artist stashed under there wouldnt be such a terrible idea, either. Then, the alarm rang again and I jumped, lunging over to hit it again with an annoyed smack. I peeked at Edward and he didnt move a hair. Hes a heavy sleeper. Ill bet hes not used to getting up this early, in his line of work. How do I get out without waking him up? Should I shake him or something? This stuff always looks so easy in the movies. The couple wakes up at the same time and cuddle for a few minutes and have clever, witty banter before the man gets up and shows his naked ass to the cameras. Why cant life be as easy as that? Oh my GOD! Im naked under here! I almost forgot about that. Although it did feel very nice having my bare skin under the quilt all night. I could see why Edward preferred to sleep this way. It was very natural, very relaxing. Only now the sun is up and I feel very weird walking around naked. I cringed at myself, ashamed after Edward had gone through such lengths to make me feel comfortable about our nudity. But 12 years of catholic school cannot just be wiped away after only one night, even by someone as talented as Edward. I hope he doesnt think Im walking around naked all day now and that he is too. I could never get my school work done. Today in school I had to let my professor know what my paper would be based on and Id have to give a little information on Edward. Nothing too deep yet, just some basic info about him, what I think makes him so interesting. Our professor is Dr. James Collier and he is about Edwards age, I think, around 27 or 28 years old. I pictured his short, cropped blonde hair and icy blue eyes, he always had stubble on his face, too. Us three girls all had a bit of a crush on him but I had managed to keep myself focused and very professional with him. I knew I couldnt tell him that I was getting orgasms from my subject the night before but I did want to ask him some things privately, which he was always willing to do after class, unlike some professors who made you book an appointment with them. It was part of our assignment, if we ever got stuck or had questions about how to proceed with our subject, he wanted us to come to him. We are dealing with people, after all, and he didnt want us doing anything to cause anyone harm. He would never let us have a suicidal subject, for instance. We werent ready for that kind of pressure yet. And if anything like that ever came up, we were supposed to call James or 911 immediately. Dr. Collier, I should call him, not James. He was always very cool and not stiff like most other teachers. Im sure I could talk to him and he could give me a little help. I waited there, laying in bed for a couple minutes more and then knew I couldnt put it off any longer. I had to pee. Slowly, I began to sit up, watching Edward like a hawk the entire time. He didnt move. He sleeps like a dead person. (LOL) I bit my bottom lip and slipped my body out from under the quilt as if it weighed a ton. I was out, Edward still asleep and I crossed my arms over my breasts, tiptoeing out of the bedroom, my eyes staring at him as I went.

UGH!!! I tripped and fell to the floor like a slab of hamburger. My breasts felt like they popped upon impact and were probably even flatter than they were before! Perfect! What the hell was that? I looked near my feet and saw that I had tripped over Edwards sneakers. Oh God, please dont wake up, please dont wake up, please, please, please! I popped my head up like a gopher out of a hole, seeing through my straw hair that half covered my eyes, he was still there, but began to groan lightly in his throat and rolled over onto his stomach now, curling his arms around his pillow, his face still peaceful and content looking. How is he this comfortable in a strangers bed? And in the middle of this, I started to psycho analyze him again. Hes hugging the pillow now. Hugging his mother? Hugging the girl he used to love? Jesus, Bella, maybe he just likes hugging the pillow and there is no deeper meaning behind it, COULDNT THAT BE POSSIBLE?! I had to get out of here now, before he really wakes up. Crawling on the floor fast, I scurried like a mouse to the bathroom, daring to stand now and grabbing my bathrobe, putting it on quickly. God, please tell me hes not really awake and saw me crawling around the apartment naked, please! Ill owe you forever. While inside the bathroom, as I used the toilet, and brushed my teeth twice and tried to brush my hair down to non-afro size, I almost felt afraid to go back out there. I half expected to see him sitting up in bed, fully awake, laughing at me. I would simply die then and would get gypped out of 13 more days of bliss, which would be just my luck. I saw a couple of his personal bathroom things here now, his toothbrush a black and red one, and a spray deodorant. And I smiled, liking these little personal touches of his, as I went back to my impossible hair. Damn, I should never go to bed with wet hair, I always look like Don King the next day! Of course, Edwards wet hair just dries and pops into place after he runs his finger through it. DAMN him! Jeez, Im jealous of Edwards beauty now. Maybe I could be my own subject again. God knows I need the help maybe more than he does. I heard the TV switch on in the living room outside and I froze, my hands in midair around my head as I listened, my eyes wider now. Hes up. I heard channels being switched and smiled, wondering what hed choose. News ? CLICK. No. Good, I hate the news. Its never good. A workout show? CLICK. No. Good, I hate people who wake up and start working out. Sponge Bob cartoon? I smiled, waiting for the click again and for the next sounds but it stayed on. I heard the remote touch the table gently and my mouth immediately opened into a horrified oval shape, my brows coming together.

Oh my God, he is watching Sponge Bob?! I covered my mouth, afraid Id start laughing like the village idiot. Why is he watching THAT? He knows Im awake and in here. Doesnt he care what I would think about this? Maybe hes playing with me again. He has that kind of warped sense of humor. I would rather believe anything else besides the fact that he likes watching Sponge Bob every morning. Hes smart, not retarded. But its still on. I heard movement in the kitchen now. The cabinets opening and closing, the refrigerator door closing. He was going to cook again? I feel so guilty about this but I cant deny that I like watching him cook. And I love eating his food. Hes a great little chef. My mother never liked to cook much and Id always have a pop tart or something for breakfast everyday. And now that I lived alone, I hated cooking for just myself. It was depressing. I would usually eat at the cafeteria or a couple of places around school. Eating alone just sucks and theres no way of sugar coating that. Rosalie and Alice ate with me sometimes, but they lived with their parents nearby and usually ate with them. It is nice, having someone here with me, I decided. Coming home last night and having someone here to say hello to me really felt good. And Edwards helloes are just phenomenal. I hoped it wouldnt feel too weird talking to Edward now, after last night. No, I instantly thought, he never makes me feel weird, just good and specialand prettyand nervous. Hey, Gary, where are you?! Sponge Bob was calling when I decided to take a deep breath and come out. Edward may have to use the toilet and I didnt want him cursing me internally for taking all day while he danced around the kitchen, waiting for relief. I turned the knob and pulled, trying to open the door in a very cool way and come gliding out, all casually and grown-up. But, of course, the door is stuck again. No. I breathed, shaking, my eyes gaping at the rusty dark brown knob, Please, no. Not now. This happens all the time. Crap door, crap doorknob!! No !! Why?!! Why now?! God truly hates me. I turned the doorknob all the way and pulled harder, jerking it. Sometimes this works. Of course, now, any illusions I had about entering the living room in a cool way were at the bottom of a cliff, burning in a twisted heap. The noises of a jerking door, of wood uselessly hitting wood over and over rung loudly through the air as if to call out, The raging dork is stuck in the bathroom!

I can do this. Put some elbow grease into it, girl! Come on! Jerking the knob again, I began making little grunting sounds as I thought it gave way a little bit for a second, butit didnt. It was inevitable and unavoidable. But it would now happen. And here he comes. Bella? a deep voice was on the other side of the door, Are you okay? He sounded amused out there, it wasnt obvious, but I heard it. I braced my right foot against the wall beside the door and demanded it silently now to open or Id take it off the hinges TODAY! Im okay. I called through the door, even now trying to sound light and adult, The door just sticks sometimes. Ive got it. Move, you fucker, move NOW! I was mentally talking to the door now, not Edward. Okay. He said and I heard him walk away. I listened for snickering or laughter but heard none. All I could hear were Sponge Bob and another cartoon voice, laughing at me. I felt my mouth snarling now as I yanked with all my body weight, shoving my foot harder against the wall, making little, sharper pulls of the knob now. God, I sound like Im trying to escape a locked closet, a desperate prisoner. Panic began to set in, knowing people needed to use the toilet first thing in the morning, I always did. Im sure Edward wants to get in here and is probably hating my guts right now. The only other place he could use would be the kitchen sink. Oh no, gross! Every other time this door opens after a few jerks on it! Today, of course, its going to be stubborn and act like CEMENT!! I hate my life. I heard water running out in the kitchen and figured he was doing dishes. Man! How can he run the water first thing in the morning and not have to urinate? Maybe he is a robot. A few more minutes passed by and all I heard from Edward was the sloshing of water and dishes, along with the cartoon he was watching. I gave in finally, panting and admitting defeat. What would I do now? Call him? God, embarrassing. Knock? No, stupid! But he was clearly not coming after me again on his own so I closed my eyes, letting my face fall into my sore, red hands as I swallowed my pride and made myself call, Edward? The water went off and I heard the padding of his footsteps slowly approaching the door. Yes, Bella? he purred, acting like he had no idea what I wanted. He can be quite a little creep, I observed. I glanced at my bright red face in the mirror to my left and closed my eyes.

I cant open the door, its too stuck. I forced the words out, wanting to crawl into a hole and die. Oh I see. He sounded like he was smiling. My face turned angry in once second and I felt myself set my jaw. Can you help me? I asked, feeling sick to my stomach now. He was making me ask him for help, knowing how humiliating it is for me. Is this more payback for yesterdays questionsor maybe todays? Perhaps. He answered, oozing with power, OrI could just let you sit in there all day. That might be fun. You could be my own personal prisoner. But I dont think I could slide any food under this door. Wow, that does sound pretty good. But, wait, no, I have classes today. Edward, please? I breathed, almost trembling now, his voice really doing things to me, I have real important classes today. Hmmm his voice was so smooth, That is a problem. Poor little Bella I growled in my head. He was playing with me again. I thought he was the toy here, not me. No. He is not a toy, dont say that, I scolded myself. He is just playful and childlike sometimes. I like that part of himmost of the time. Edward I whined a little now, acting like a four year old myself, You said youd be a good littleboy. I changed the word toy to boy, hoping he wouldnt catch that. I would never demean him or call him a toy. I want him to see himself as more than that. He already was more than thatto me. And that was enough to make him stop toying with me. Alright, fair Bella, stand back! I will save thee! He made me smile as he did an over-the-top prince type voice, as if he was coming to my rescue. He is too cute. Jerk. I got back as far as I could, standing in the open shower. There was not much room in here and I really didnt want to be killed by a door flying open. This should be good, I thought, waiting to see what would happen next. With one hard kick and the sound of his foot against the wood of the door, it flew open hard, smashing into the wall and making a medium sized hole in the cheap drywall behind it. I had given a little yelp when the door came flying open, not expecting him to open it so fast. It was REALLY stuck HARD! I used all my might and couldnt budge it. God, I am so weak. I have to start drinking milk. Edward came in a bit, moving the knob a little towards himself, and peeking behind it, seeing the white powder on the floor, the gaping black hole staring back at him. God, he kicked the door open with one kickand he has no shoes on. I am so turned on right now. Ooops. He cringed a little, looking at the hole and then to me with apology in his eyes, Ill fix that, Bella.

I couldnt help but smile at him. Dont worry about it. I stayed where I was, mesmerized by the sight of him standing there only wearing a cotton pair of tight gray shorts. He looked at me and his eyes sunk deeply into mine. Are YOU alright? he asked, concerned about me now. Yea, fine, I felt my cheeks flush a little, I just always get stuck in here with that damn door. Thanks. I was so embarrassed and could only imagine what he was thinking about me. Ill bet non-geeks only pay him $10,000 for two weeks of his time. Well, I have saved you, fair Bella. He strode in, doing his regal voice again, his eyes burning into mine, he was nose to nose with me when he asked, What prize shall you bestow upon me? You can have anything of mine you want, I almost said, if I had anything worth getting. But I had a strong feeling he wasnt asking for any THING. God, his eyes are deadly I noticed again as they worked their spell on me. Maybe he slipped something special into my eggs yesterday and now whenever hes near me I turn into a quivering heap of stupid. I didnt know what else to say except to squeak out, A kiss? I cleared my throat, not wanting to sound like Mr. Bill. Mmmmmyes. He smiled and opened his mouth, closing it over my lips, his one hand leaning on the shower door, the other on the tile wall. I was so glad I brushed my teeth and tongue twice. But, even though he didnt brush yet, he tasted wonderful. How does he DO that?! He kissed me over and over again and my head was becoming dizzy. I didnt know it at the time, but my body moved back, still standing in the shower, until my back was against the tile. Not letting me get away from him, he followed me into the shower, stepping in and pulling the shower door closed behind him, all while still kissing me with expert style. I heard my voice whimper, hoping he didnt turn the water on us. Stop trying to get away from me. He purred, kissing me a little harder, I dont like it. Sorry. I breathed, unable to get away from him anymore, and not wanting to. His arms rested on the tile walls at my sides as his tongue gently probed in, moving softly at first. I kissed him back, doing what came natural with my lips, hoping it was feeling good for him, too. I am so damn inexperienced. I hate that. Then he actually whimpered!! WOW, I made HIM whimper?! I rock !

Bella he whispered, his right hand moved down and pulled my bathrobe belt, opening the robe as I clenched my fists at my sides, never knowing what to do with my hands. Damn hands! Here. He seemed to read my mind and took my hands into his, shaking them out as he grinned at me, still nose to nose with me, Touch me, Bella. He brought my hands to rest on his lower back while he went back to kissing me. I felt my hands move up and down his back. He is so warm and soft, his skin is like a babys. Not the way it looks, the way it FEELS, only tight coiled muscle beneath the silky soft surface. It took only seconds for my hands to wander down to his shorts, stroking down the firmness of his buttocks, my fingers curling inward a bit. His voice moaned into my open mouth as his right hand moved down my jumbled up stomach, his fingers stroking softly up and down my clit again. I gasped, opening my eyes. No, not againnot right nowno moreit needs rest! Doesnt it? My body immediately remembered those fingers and woke right up, smiling happily and leaping up and down like an eager puppy wanting its Master. But it was all happening inside me. Ummm I heard my voice talking, even though I didnt want to be talking, Dont you have to go to the bathroom? WHAT?!!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!!!! I AM A FRIGGING RETARD!!!!! He smiled and squinted slightly but kept kissing and licking my lips. Not at the moment. He murmured, kissing me quickly again, But thanks for asking. Sorry. I was saying again, I dont know whats wrong with me. KISS. I think I was dropped on my head as a baby. I was talking into his mouth. KISS. Nothing is wrong with you. He kissed me again. We were sliding slowly down the tile wall, towards the bottom of the tub. Oh no, what is he doing? UmmmEdwardwhat time is it? I was talking again. Shut up, Bella. He demanded softly, devouring my lips again. That is a very good suggestion. Shut up, Bella. Yes. I will do that now. Thank you, Edward. Before I knew it, I was laying on the porcelain and his lips were traveling down my neck, my robe opening more. His hand on my breast, squeezing, cuppinghis mouth wetly moving over my nipple as his hand held it helplessly in place. Uhhhh I looked up at the ceiling, heavily breathing again. I was his slave. He is the most dangerous creature of all. A predator after my heart, already digging his fangs inside me. Everything about him lures me in his face, his voiceeven his smell. As if I could tell him no.as if I could fight him offor would want to. Worse than a killerhe was designed to seduce. And he had

conquered every other woman before me, more experienced, more worldly than I. He is going to kill me. He is going to break my heart. He was now conquering and seducing ME, so easilytoo easily. I have never wanted a man this muchin my life. I want him now. And he told me to trust him. I so want tobut something inside me keeps sayingDont. But even now, with my mind knowing all this, and after only one night, I cant control my thirst for himI want him, I need him, I CRAVE him. He is like a drug to meone I itch and suffer physically withouthe is like my own personal brand of heroin. I hated being in school yesterday without him and today its going to suck even more. Time without him was pointless and cruel. I dont know if I can control myself. I am under his control now. I am caught in his trap. He has me. I cant read his mindand he wont let me in it. I wish he would tell me what hes thinking. Im so afraid that any second now, hell just disappear, a sinful, marvelous dream that poofs up into smoke as soon as the sun has risen. You have no ideahow long Ive waited for you. My voice panted lovingly as his eyes opened and soaked deeply down into my bones, then moved up to my glistening eyes. My legs were open and he was laying between themand I felt his body harden against me. If he asks me to explain thatI dont even know if I can. I just FEEL it. After a silent pause his voice curled like heat around me. You dont have to wait anymore, Bella. He said in a low voice, I am hereand I want you. I want you so badly. I didnt know what to say. In my brain things were moving a mile a minute, trying to find a way out of going to school today. Edward looked at where we were and looked at me apologetically, But perhaps this is not the right time and place. I felt the tears in my eyes thicken as he slowly moved back to a standing position, bringing me up with him, gently closing up my robe and tying a single knot with the belt. He smiled down at me and kissed my forehead. Its alright, Bella. He promised with his voice, I will wait for you. When you are ready, Ill be there. We have plenty of time. Sorry aboutthat. (he motioned with his head to the shower floor)we always seem to wind up in the shower. There must be some magic in here. There is magic wherever you are. God, I am falling fast. I think Im already in love with him. I am such a tool. Come on, Ill make you some breakfast. He led me out of the shower, watching me step out so I wouldnt kill myself. He kept holding my hand, leading me into the kitchen, sitting me on the stool. In my mind, for a second, I was at the club Fire and he was leading me to that private room.

Placing a kiss on the top of my head, he went to get me a glass of orange juice, placing it down in front of me. Drink. He smiled seductively and turned away, putting the juice in the fridge, and then he came back, placing my notebook down next to my drink, a pen on top of it. Do your homework and Ill be right back. Edward was now moving to the bathroom, I was fine until you SAID it! Oh, now he has to pee. I laughed to myself a little, hoping he didnt get locked in there now. But he was smart enough to leave the door ajar an inch. I tried not to listen to the water hitting water, opening my notebook and trying to focus my mind now, hoping I wasnt so far gone that I couldnt do my work anymore. Now I am sitting here, listening to Edward brush his teeth and my hand began to write: I love your hair. I love your skin. I love touching you. I love pleasing you. I love belonging to you. Where did this come from? My hand was like acting on its own, writing all the things he had said to me last night. Bella, do you see a theme here? Shit. He was coming back and I slammed my book shut, tossing my pen away from me, onto the counter. My brain wanted me to be mad at him when he came back to the kitchen. But as soon as I saw him with his bare chest and perfect little ass stuffed into those soft looking shortsand the perfect bare feetI couldnt do it. Studying him is getting more complicated than I thought. I was learning all kinds of new things about me as well. What time do you have to go today? Edward asked, unsure of my plans. Oh, in an hour. I peeked at the wall clock over the stove, I will probably get home around 2 oclock this afternoon. Alright then I have to move my ass then. He said, playful and light again, leaning over the counter on his arms, looking at me, What would you like to eat this morning? I gave him a smile, my bad girl side emerging again. Wowwwww Edward purred with a smile, Look at that evil smile! I am very impressed! And after only one night .you fascinate me. I bit my bottom lip and blushed, unsure why his words made me feel so good.

Toast is fine, if thats okay. I made it easy for him today, I really wasnt very hungry. Finding out Im the biggest sucker on earth is doing things to my stomach. Thats all? he looked a little disappointed. I nodded, smirking at him. Do you feel alright? he asked, now looking concerned, taking the bread out of the refrigerator. Are you kidding? I scoffed, I feel wonderful. Im gonna be a wreck today in school thinking about last night. He smiled, putting the bread into the toaster slots, pressing it down with the lever. Youre gonna think about me in school today? he looked surprised and happy about this. Definitely. I admitted, drinking my juice. Ill think of you, too, Bella. He bit his own bottom lip now, looking at me, waiting for the toast, I havent had that good a time in a long time. I smiled, loving the sound of his voice and loving every single thing he uttered. Trying to get my professionalism back, if it wasnt too late, I came back with, Well now that weve had our good time, when I come home, we have an appointment. Dont be late. The toast popped up and it was nice and light, exactly how I liked it. Butter on it? he asked me. Please. I grinned, watching him get the butter and start to spread it on the hot toast, Did you hear what I saidabout our appointment? Yes I heard you. He said in a friendly voice, I will be here, on time, on the couch like a good little patient, Dr. Bella. He placed the toast down in front of me and grinned, going over to wash last nights dishes now. I really hate seeing him doing these things for me but damn it, I do love seeing him wash a dish. I have no idea why, either. It excites me. I have to make a note of that. Is he making fun of me when he says Dr. Bella? I wish I knew. I would have to address this today, amongst other things. Umm, Bella? he looked up and kept washing, I have small plans today, nothing much, just a bachlorette party that starts at 12. It should be over by 1 or 1:30, but I will come right home afterwards. I take the train so, just in case I am a few minutes late, I dont want you to think Im blowing you off or anything. Is that alright? He always asks me if everything is alright. Like hes afraid of me or something. He really is working with the mindset that I DO actually own him and that bothers me. And he is always to easily bending to my wants, and his yes, Bella every time I say something to him. He is so obedient, like a pet and that disturbs me

too. How am I going to get through to him? I have to think this over in school today and get that advice from Dr. Collier. I decided to try something here, even though we werent in a session right now. Edward I tried to keep my voice pleasant, What if I told youno, its not alright? I want you to stay here all day and not move from that chair. Would you do it? Yes. He said without even thinking about it, licking the butter off his thumb as he put the butter away, Do you want me dressed or undressed? I let a breath out that told him I was astounded. My mouth hung open in shock at him. But he looked like everything was perfectly normal. What? he asked, smiling a little. I couldnt smile back this time. I felt such a feeling of pity for him that I couldnt help. That would be 5 hours, Edward, sitting in a chair, not moving. I informed, spelling it out further for him. Thats easy. He shrugged, I have no problem with it, if its what you want. Well I do. I heard my voice reply, I shouldnt be allowed to tell you to do something like that no one should. You should tell me that youre going to do what you want to do and that I cant order you around. You would lose money if I told you not to go to your appointment today. You would get in trouble with your boss. Doesnt that bother you? It doesnt matter. He shrugged, I belong to you now and you rule what I do. If you tell me to do something, Im going to do it. My feelings dont matter here. Im here for you, Bella. I rule? I couldnt even finish the sentence, staggered. I had to calm down, I had to maintain a calm faade no matter what he said. Thats the heart of being a psychiatrist, not to react so strongly that you alienate your patient. But I had broken the rules. I care about him and I was mad at him for being like this, for saying these things. But I should want him to say what hes thinking, even if it IS insane. Your toast is getting cold, Bella. He tried to change the subject. Wait. I looked at him, putting a clean wet dish in the drying rack beside him, Edward, listen, I dont want you to act anymore, okay? I want you to be yourself during our two weeks. From now on, if you feel something, if you dont like something, or have something on your mind you want to say, I want you to say it and do it. Can you do that for me? What do you mean? he looked confused, Act? And yes, Sponge Bob was still playing but he wasnt paying attention to it so I let that go for now. I know that you must play a certain part when you do what you do for a living. I began nicely, staying relaxed, And maybe after awhile, it becomes who you arelike you get used to it and pretty soon, you dont even have a will of your

own anymore. You know? Likewhat are YOUR opinions? What do YOU like? Like, for example, last night, when you went to kiss my foot, why did you do that? It was pretty. He looked at me, answering honestly without a pause. And you stopped. Why? I asked, taking a bite of my toast so he wouldnt get upset. You told me to. He said, sounding so innocent to my ears all of a sudden. But if you wanted to, why couldnt you just say, no Bella, I want to kiss your feet and I will? I asked. No. his eyes looked harder now, I dont want you to be angry with me. But if you And besides that, you own me. He cut in, adding another reason in. Edward, you are a person. I kept cool even though I wanted to yell at him and shake him, No one can OWN anyone. You are not owned by me. You are helping me out with my paper and you are also helping me out withother.things. But I dont own you, Edward. I would never act like I did, either. I know a lot of people have treated you that way. But you must know its not really true that I own you. Dont you? I understand what youre saying, Bella. His voice sounded wise now suddenly, And I appreciate the sentiment behind that. But you forget one thing. You have paid me twenty thousand dollars. For 13 more days, you DO own me. If you tell me to sit, Ill sit. If you tell me to eat dog food, I will. If you hurt me, I will still stay here. Ive sold myself to you, Bella. I have lost any say I have in myself. Thats what it means being a wh-- He stopped himself but I knew what he was going to call himself. I had lots of work to do with him. I dont think I am good enough to rescue him. My first patient. My first love. Yes, damn it, I love him. I am such a moron. How did I fall in love in one day? Oh yea, seven orgasms. Dont be angry with me, please? he almost pleaded, his eyes doing the same. He was finished with the dishes and dried his hands. God, listen to how scared he is that Im angry with him. He wants to please everyone. He is terrified of not being approved of. Thats from his parents. Never getting their time or approval, he is so afraid of the same happening with really anyone who he comes across in his life. And with that means, he would do anything they said as long as they showed him their praise and appreciation. Edward I wanted to cry. I dont want to fight with you, Bella. He was walking slowly towards me, coming around behind me. His arms came around me and held me close to him. Right under my chin, his muscular arms folded over me like angels wings. His lips touched my temple and he said, I will answer all your questions from now on, I promise. I will try. But Im afraid of how youll see me once you know all about me. I will look ugly to you. No you wont, Edward. I gently touched his arms with my hands, rubbing them, Youre beautiful. Youll never be ugly to me. His lips kissed my cheek so deeply and he moved his hands down my arms, entwining his fingers into mine, resting his chin on my shoulder.

He didnt talk for a long time and I would have to leave for school soon. I wasnt angry with Edward, I just wanted him to stop seeing himself as a thing. A toy, a slave, a dancer. It would take time, a lot longer than 2 weeks to make him see that. But I only have two weeks. I hated thinking of Edward leaving me and going to belong to some other bitch whod make him eat dog food and kneel naked in her doorway. Mostly because, I knew he would do it if she paid him to. I wanted to know how he got into this life, what changed him into what he is today, what pain crushed his spirit so badly. I had to start rolling up my sleeves and getting to work. Hard questions had to be answered. I didnt have time to NOT ask them to spare his feelings because I was falling for him. Even if he gets angry with me, I have to try to help him and break through his walls. If I failed and anything horrible happened to him at the hands of someone, I could never forgive myself. Alright, Edward. I kissed his arm, Two o clock is our appointment. If youre late, thats fine. But try to be on time. He let me stand up and get my own backpack. I put my notebook and pen inside it, zipping it up. Go to your appointment today. I turned to him, looking him in the eyes. He looked so fragile suddenly, And well talk when I get home. Alright? Then he smiled with relief. Is that because Im not angry with him? Yes, Bella. He agreed, using his trademark phrase, Thank you. I wasnt sure what he was thanking me for but I said, Youre welcome, anyway. See you later. I almost walked out the door but then turned around, seeing his face watching me. Come here. I smiled at him, unable to resist that face. He came up to me, smiling, putting his hands on the sides of my face and before his lips descended upon mine, he purred, You remembered. Like I would FORGET to kiss you goodbye. I said, feeling his lips, so perfectly wet and soft, smooth like hot water. He tastes soo good. He gave me a deep, earth shattering kiss this morning. I would have to lecture him more often before I left. Finally, he released me, probably hoping we were still friends. I had to wait a second for my eyes to stop shivering before I began to move out the door. Edward looked like he was trying not to laugh at me and I wondered why. Have a good day, Bella. He smiled from ear to ear. You too. I smiled up at him, wondering what his problem was, See you later, doll face. He looked down as I left and then I heard a little snicker escape his lips.

I decided to ignore that and kept walking down the hall, not hearing the door close yet. I cant I heard his deep buttery voice mumble to himself and I turned, afraid he meant he cant stay with me anymore. Maybe I had gone too far with what I said. I was ready to start begging when he was walking up to me. Bella? he put his hands on my shoulders. Yes? I frowned, confused. His smile showed again and he tried to stop doing it, holding in a laugh I could tell. What? Dont you thinkyou should wear something else to school? he asked, keeping a semi-straight face. I looked down and saw my short little pink care bears bathrobe, almost open in front with the single knot tie very loose. OH FUCK! I shouted, not believing myself and my missing BRAIN. Edward burst out laughing, following me as I raced myself into the apartment. I even almost shut the door on him as he tried to cross the threshold to come in but he just kept laughing, falling to his knees, holding his stomach as I slammed the door to my bedroom to get dressed. Now he decides to be his own little person. I grumbled, hearing his laughter becoming louder out there. I smiled, laughing too. Hearing him cast its spell over me and hating it, I was laughing harder, too. Trying to talk between laughs, Edward was panting, saying, Your psych teacher wouldve loved to see you.come to school that way.Im sure Shut up. I laughed, throwing a pillow at his face. Your cute little knees he kept laughing, out of breath, And a care bear on the back of your robe! In a college! His laughter was suffocating him and I was glad. When I came out of my room in jeans and a t-shirt, he was laying face down on the floor, still hysterical. I think I even saw his eyes tearing up. Wait, Bella WAIT! he grabbed my leg as I tried to walk past him, trying to quiet his laugh. What you silly little house elf? I randomly called him, my bag on my shoulder. Was that Grumpy Bear on the back ? he burst out laughing again. Smiling, I jerked my leg free and joked, Maybe I change my mind about you being yourself if this is what youre like! Go back to being your little obedient self! I was in the hallway while Edward kept laughing and he was calling, WAIT BELLA, WAIT!!

What? I spun around, half smiling at him as he now laid on his bare back, in my open doorway, holding the door open a bit. Ill miss you. He smiled, sounding very serious now, even though he was still smiling and his eyes glistened. Ill miss you too, you dope. I grinned, not wanting to, walking away, the giggles of Edward Cullen sending me away with a smile on my lips and a laugh in my heart. Maybe I can help him after all. Please God, let me help him. I rushed to class, hoping I could get some answers there from Dr. Collier. I tried to get my brain to work now that I wasnt near Edward. It seemed on DUH mode whenever I was in that mans presence. I had to focus.

6 BPOV Class is over now and Im standing here at Dr. Colliers desk, letting him look over a list of questions and things I want to discuss with Edward. James is saying nothing right now, he is looking over my work and I am counting the seconds until I can see Edward again. I looked at the clock over his head on the wall. 1:06pm. Edward is half naked somewhere right now, in a room full of horny women. Theyre probably groping his body in the most disgusting ways. God, Im jealous. James began to make a couple notes in my book, and began talking. You should ask him if theres ever been any sexual abuse in his past. He said as he wrote, not looking up at me yet, Also, any substance abusedrugs, alcoholsomething that helps him cope with what he does. Does he do women AND men? Any homosexual activities? Oh my God. I am feeling sick just hearing him tell me to ask Edward these things. And do I want to hear the answers to these questions? I wish I had the guts to tell James the whole story with Edward and I and ask for his advice. Although, hed probably tell me to get my money back and ask Edward to leave and just study him in a professional way. My grade would be screwed, not to mention my life if Edward left now. You okay, Bella? James made eye contact with me now. Yea, fine. I smiled and perked myself up, acting like I was just concentrating. One other thing I was curious about I cleared my throat, He says things like I love your hair, I love your skin, I love, I love, I love all the time. I figured that means he is most likely just saying all those things women want to hear, right? Like, he probably doesnt mean it when he says those things to women. James smirked at me and looked across the room. Probably not. He replied, confirming my suspicions, But he might be so far gone that he actually BELIEVES what hes saying, but he loves everyone. He has probably grown used to saying those lines and making those faces that make women believe hes sincere that nowhe doesnt know what he loves, really. He

loves it all because he has to. To survive in his life, he has to find every woman attractive, he has to smile at all of them, let them touch him, make them believe that he loves their attentions. You should ask him about that, but I will bet he falls under the category of not realizing that hes even doing it. Its become ingrained into his personality. Wow. I felt tears in my eyes and blinked them back. Not now. I dont know if Im good enough to help him. I admitted, looking down at my opened notebook, I want to. Hes such a sweet person, really. You can only do so much, Bella. James said to me with understanding in his voice, Youre a student butafter you have done what you can, you can recommend some doctors that are brilliant. Ill give you their names. This Edward can go see them if he chooses to. But it is his choice. He may not want to. But your assignment is not to help anyone. Youre not ready for that, Bella. Just study what you see and write about it. Dont try to do anything. You could cause more damage than good. But you are good, Bella. This is a complicated person youve chosen to work on but I believe you can do it and do it right. But I also know youre very caring. You must turn that off here, Bella. Do not get too involved with him. And if anything goes wrong or if he starts to act weird or creepy in any way, call me. You have my number, still? Yes, its in my cell. I nodded. Every student has his number in case of an emergency with their subject. Good. He looked over my notes again and asked, And your questions are good, too. Is there anything else you want to ask me? I had lots more to ask him but that would mean telling him about my relationship with Edward, if thats what you call it when you pay someone to give you orgasms. I was on my own and I knew it. I even didnt know if I could trust Rosalie and Alice with this information. I love them but I feel dirty telling them about us. Those moments are private, only for Edward and myself. Well, I was also going to try that word association exercise you told us about. I informed. Good, good! James eyes lit up a bit, I think youll be surprised what you can find out from just one word. Let me know after you do it what you got. I will. I smiled a little, Thank you, Dr. Collier. I appreciate your help. Anytime for you, Bella. James picked up his leather briefcase off his desk, about to walk out behind me, Have a good day and see you tomorrow. Okay. Bye. I grinned and walked out of the empty classroom, rushing to meet my girls for lunch in the cafeteria. EPOV I always wonder what these cab drivers think when Im sitting in the back seat, dressed as a cop. Maybe that my police cruiser broke down or that I got my car stolen? He probably doesnt even give a fuck, why do I care what he thinks? You can drop me off here. I said firmly, not wanting to be dropped off right in front of the house. I paid my fare, giving a generous tip and put my mirror cop sunglasses on. The cab pulled over, stopped and I got out, placing my policeman hat over my hair, hiding its tousled, gelled appearance.

I have seen some other dancers cop uniforms and most of them are really cheesy. Mine is not. I have a real uniform, bought from a true police uniform supply company. Dark navy blue pants, the leather belt that held gun, flashlight and nightstick, the powder blue shirt with the real NYPD patches on the sides of my long sleeves. The navy blue tie, the golden pins that go on my collar that bear four letters, NYPD. I had to admit, I loved looking this way. I felt almost like a cop, like a hero. But Im not a hero, Im the bad guy. Impersonating an officer. Wearing oil and body glitter and a g-string under this noble outfit. Yes, I know, I am going to hell. Tell me something I dont know. Hell, I even have a real badge in a leather holder in my back pocket. I have the whistle, I even have a real gun, unloaded of course, but who knows that? I hated to ever look fake when I was doing a job and women appreciated that attention to detail. Looking at me now, you couldnt tell that I was just a stripper playing the part of a cop. I looked the part completely. All I was missing was the police car. Oh well, maybe Santa will deliver on that wish someday. Maybe Ill wear this getup back to Bellas today and scare her a little. That would be fun, if she doesnt freak out or anything. God, shes a lot of fun. I felt myself smiling as I walked a couple more blocks to the house I was due at soon. I dont know when Ive laughed like that last but once I started, I couldnt stop. And then she looked so cute, pretending to be mad at me, yelling at me even. But I know shes not mad at me. She is justsad for me. And I can see that sometimes when she looks at me. She doesnt understandand how could she? Shes not a free and easy whore like I am and Id never want her to be. And I will answer her questions if it means I can stay and sleep beside her and smell her hair and worship her body as it was meant to be worshipped. She is just starting to bloom and it is lovely to beholdfor me. Last night was amazing for me, not so much because I showered her and massaged her and pleasured her. All that WAS great and I enjoyed it all too muchbut there was something more though. I dont know what it is but I like being around her. I like talking to her, even if its during those school therapy sessions she insists on us having. I wanted to tell her to give up on me, that Im not worth helping, but she would never listen. She needed a grade on this so I will play along and tell her some juicy things about my past, but nothing I want to keep private, and help her get a good grade. Then when my two weeks are over, I can go my way and she will go back to her life, hopefully a bit more confidant and experienced to know what she wants in a partner and be able to boldly go after it and enjoy her sensual side. I will really miss her for awhile after this job is done. But I dont feel like Im doing a job with her, I feel like Im at my girlfriends house hanging out. I had forgotten what thats like. Dont get attached Edward, I scolded myself, dont get too involved. You did your romantic first night thing, now you have to see whats next. Sexual intercourse is next. I almost took her this morning in the dry shower. Caught up in the moment of rescuing her from her little prison, I almost lost

control of myself. Thank god she couldnt shut up, it made me wake up and realize what I was doing. I had to wait for her to ask me for it. She is not great at saying what she needs and wants. God, she was trapped in the bathroom for 15 minutes today and wouldnt even ask me to help her. Stubborn. Willful. Challenging. She didnt even say anything to me about Sponge Bob being on. She holds her tongue too much. I want her to tell me what to do, I want her to say what she wants. For a minute I thought a miracle had happened and she had found her voice when she said she didnt want me to go to work today and to sit in the chair until she got home. Finally, something I could do that she had demanded and wanted! But she was just testing me to see what I would say. Does she want me to get upset and yell and throw things? Maybe that is what she wants. I am so unsure with her at times. She is very difficult for me to read. I could ask her more today during my session with Dr. Bella. One minute, she looks pleased with me, then the next minute, she looks sad or sorry for me, then she turns very quiet. That is the one I like least, when she says nothing. I am always afraid whats going on in that head of hers. I know she wants to change me and take me out of the life Im in but its just impossible. I have accepted that. But she is very caring to try and get through to me. She really touched me when she was telling me that no one owned me, and I should be myself and stop acting. I really hope things dont go really off track and Id have to leave the job early, I would hate that. Its very different, being her toy part time then talking to her telling her all my secrets the rest of the time. How can I tell her private things that keep me sane while I work and then do them with her after Ive told her all about it? It would hurt her and ruin the illusion and romance and I NEVER do that, not to anyone. Not even to Raven and that lady is a killer in training. I should tell Bella about Raven, those are some true stories that even scare the shit out of ME. It would make a compelling chapter in her paper and throw her off the trails of my past hopefully. I really do want to help her get a good gradebut I am not about to tell her my real story. I hate being pitied and there are certain doors I will never let her in, no matter how hard she pounds on them. They are all I really have left that are just mine. This is the house, 2435 Agnes Lane. I can see cars parked all along the entire street. Yep, this is the bachelorette party. Only I hope they didnt think I was just going to come to the door and announce myself as the stripper. One thing Victoria taught me is acting and being different from the herd, putting my own special signature on things. This would be no different. I checked my police radio and it was still up and working. Good. I went to the back door not the front door, my fake gun in my hand. I could hear a little music playing inside and I could see lots of women there, gifts, food. I grinned to myself, loving this part. Quietly, I approached the back door and tried the knob. Open! They are mine.

POLICE !! EVERYBODY ON THE FLOOR!! I shouted in my most masculine cop voice, scaring the shit out of every living thing in the room. Screams belted out of every single woman as I cocked the gun, my finger resting on the trigger as I took two more steps in, reeking of authority and power. NOW, I SAID, ON THE FLOOR!! ALL OF YOU!! GET DOWN AND STAY DOWN!! FACE DOWN!! I commanded them, yelling louder as they all scrambled to the carpet like bank hostages. I heard a couple of them giggling, knowing who I was and what I was there for, but most had no idea and were whimpering, looking afraid and nervous. QUIET!! I barked, getting the silence I ordered. Okay, about 30 women I noticed as I walked in further, standing over the bodies below. Good, a big number. Dont MOVE, any of you. I scowled, stepping around the still bodies. Younger girls, older women, thin, larger, they were all here, as always. And I would please them all, as always. Whats going on here?! I demanded, still wearing my sunglasses for effect. YOU! I reached down with one hand and yanked gently on a blonde head of hair, raising her face up to me. She was grinning but her face was very pink, Whats going on in here? I repeated, seething. A bachelorette party. She said in a little tiny voice. A WHAT?! I frowned, acting as if I didnt believe her. A bachelorette party. She repeated and another woman said it too, beside her. WAS I TALKING TO YOU?! I shouted at the one beside her and she began laughing, but I stayed in character. No, officer, the lady I yelled at replied obediently. Bachelorette party. You must think Im stupid or something. I sneered in disbelief as I stood up, letting go of the woman Id been interrogating. I am in control of the entire group, my gun still in my hand, pointed up at the ceiling for the moment. Which one of you is Anna Nickles?! I asked, not yelling anymore but still very agitated. I was looking for my bride. Here. I heard an even smaller voice say from across the room and a couple other girls around the area also peeked up and were pointing at a brunette laying on her stomach. WHERE? I barked, moving closer to them. Here. A young womans voice said again, raising up her hand a little and then I found her. She was peeking up at me, her head turned towards me slightly, looking very nervous. You?! I looked at her and asked. She nodded and I gently grabbed her long curly hair, not really pulling it, just for effect, Get up!

Her friends giggled and watched as I holstered my piece and grabbed a dining room chair, bringing it to the middle of the living room where all my prisoners were laying there, but all watching. I put the chair down hard and moved her to it, shoving her down and barked, SIT. You are in so much trouble, Anna. More high pitched gigglesI was doing well so far. The poor bride was absolutely petrified, clearly not knowing what to expect from me next. I kicked her feet apart roughly. She wore jeans and a nice blouse, very attractive, in her late 20s I would guess. She knows Im her stripper now but I was not like a usual stripper. I play my part to perfection. Give me your hand. I went around behind her, and took out my real police handcuffs, doing it just as a cop would do, taking her right hand, bringing it behind her and slapping the cuff onto her wrist. She screamed out, surprised by this, and I got the other hand, bringing it back, slapping that cuff on too. The entire room was now howling and laughing and laying on their stomachs watching intently. A couple of them called, ANNA!! WOOOO!!! Oh my GOD!! Anna squealed, laughing, a bright shade of neon pink. Poor Anna looked like she was going to have a heart attack. But all brides to be are like this. Not used to such things. About to be married, about to start a family of their own, about to see their handsome husband slowly turn into a couch potato, watching his hair fall out, watching his stomach get larger and larger. Poor women. They all had no fantasy in their lives, sadly, which is why I have such a high paying job. I would be in her memories now, if I do my job right, when that happens to her. Behind her, on the dining room table, I sat my radio down. There was an ipod in there and would play my list of songs I had set up for this party when I was ready for it. Not yet. QUIET I SAID! I shouted at her and she bit her lips down hard, trying not to react out loud to me yet, Anna Nickles. You are under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Of course, none of them remained silent. I had to raise my voice to get the rest of my speech out as I stared at her through my sunglasses sternly, tensing my jaw. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. I went on as Anna tried her best to keep a straight face. You have the right to have an attorney present now and during any future questioning. I continued firmly, withdrawing my nightstick and holding at my side, If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed to you free of charge if you wish. Do you understand these rights I have explained to you, Anna? Yes. She said coyly. Good. I said curtly, crossing my arms, Now why dont you confess to me what youve done and make it easier on yourself?

I havent done ANYTHING. She replied, giggling as everyone else started cheering, laughing and screaming. Come on, Anna. I moved my nightstick up her right leg, along her inner thigh, getting howls from all the women now, including Annas own squeals, Dont make me get rough with you now. Tell me what youve done and maybe Ill have mercy on you. More screams and laughter. Nothing! Nothing!! Anna pleaded, her skin still aglow with fright as she smiled from ear to ear, I swear, Mr. Officer, Sir. Really! Now shes being cute. Good girl. Thats not the way Michael tells it. I informed. (Michael is the groom). What did HE say?! Annas eyes got larger as she laughed with all the other women there. He says youre a very bad girl, Anna. I stated, making my nightstick move up her breasts, slightly along the side of her as she struggled and kicked a bit, squealing and laughing. And Ive been sent here to straighten you out properly. And I intend to do so. I said, full of authority. WOOOOOOHHHH !!!! was all around me, and laughing, always laughing. Nervous reaction. And you will sit there quietly and take your punishment, do you hear me, Anna? I went on, stroking her left inner thigh now with my nightstick, getting big loud reactions from everyone now. Perhaps if you behave to my satisfaction, I will release you. Is that clear? Yes Sir. She said, almost making me smile. But her voice was still small and afraid. I said IS THAT CLEAR?! I shouted in her face. YES!! she screamed back, laughing right afterwards. Very good, Anna. I stroked her hair gently, then grabbed it a little hard, Lets see how innocent you truly are, shall we? I put the nightstick in its strap on my belt and went around behind her now, hitting PLAY on my ipod/radio. MOM! Anna laughed, kicking her leg a little bit, HELP ME! No way, baby, youre on your own! Annas mother laughed back at her. Oh dont worry Mom, Im going to get you later, too. The wonderful guitar licks of Elvis Jailhouse Rock began to play loudly as I moved back around in front of the bride. Women were screaming everywhere as I took off the hat, and sat it on top of Annas little head.

Screams, laughter. Slowly, I removed my sunglasses next, letting my eyes look over the brim of them at Anna as they came off my nose. She smiled at me, liking me so far. I hooked the arm of my sunglasses into the collar of her blouse and I took off the tie, slowly, a real knot, not a clip on tie. I curled the tie around her neck, playing with her long dark hair a little, giving a stroke to her cheek with the back of my hand. More screaming. Anna was smiling up at me sweetly, now seeing my whole face. I just kept my eyes on her while I gave my cop shirt a tug, the buttons flying and the shirt opened. Howling. Cheering. Laughing. Slowly, I rolled my shoulders out of the sleeves, one at a time, letting the shirt fall off me, catching it in my hands behind me and looping it around Anna, dancing it down around her waist, making her hips move up and down a bit out of her chair, towards me as I leaned in close to her, holding my hips to hers for a second, rolling my pelvis in circles against her jeans. Oh MY GODDDD!! Anna screeched, her legs kicking a little bit more on the floor, MOMMY !! Stop that. I sneered at her, Nothing is going to save you now. Youre mine. I left my shirt there around her hips, and slowly I removed my leather gun belt. I took a step back and giving my special pants a hard yank, the snaps opened and released my pants from my body instantaneously as the screams nearly deafened me. My ass completely exposed, and my penis just barely covered by the little piece of black cloth stared back at every womans eyes as I threw the pants back to the ladies in the room. Anna was screaming and struggling in her chair, helpless to do anything to stop me as I moved around her, my body slick and slightly oiled up as I moved my hands down along my torso, still looking only at my bride to be, doing this for her, no one else. I was far enough away from her now that I could get on my knees and drop on all fours, crawling over to her like a large jungle cat, rolling my shoulders with each move of my arms. Climbing up easily onto her chair, I slowly straddled her with my legs, smiling down at her laughing, helpless face almost hidden by my cop hat on her head. Cat calls, shouts, giggling. I raised myself up on my knees in the chair so my hard penis was practically out of its tiny silk pouch and I moved it up and down her stomach and waist. She was really struggling now but going nowhere until I was done with her. At the same time my pulsing cock was moving up and down her body, my bare chest was right in her face now, too. She tried moving her head back but she was trapped and had nothing to do except squeal and scream.

I felt someones hand behind me give my ass a hard slap and I laughed out loud at that one, not catching just which one of them it was. See, no women are truly innocent. I grinded my chest down into hers very slowly to the music and I kept moving downward, accompanied by constant noise from the women around me, urging me onward. I bit my bottom lip, looking up into her excited and wild eyed expression. I was on my knees between Annas open legs now and I had my lips kissing into her blouse, right between the breasts as she hollered louder now, still my prisoner. I moved slowly downward, placing deep kisses straight down her white blouse as the guests all shouted approvingly at the attentions I was giving their friend. My hands stroked up and down the outer sides of Annas legs, creating a nice warm friction against the denim. Soon I was kissing the denim seam between Annas legs, breathing very hot air into the thick material. She SCREECHED and bellowed in protest, laughing and turning eight different shades of pink. I quickly came back up to her, straddling her again, letting my naked ass sit lightly on her legs and taking her face in my hands and planting a very large kiss upon her lipsand she kissed me back in return. Here comes the bride All I could hear now was WOOOOOOOO!!!!!! I brought my kisses down her chin and then went for her neck, taking forever to christen every spot I could find there. Oh MY GOD!! she kept screaming, not able to stand my kisses into her neck anymore and I saw her pucker her lips up to me again, wanting more of me on her lips now. I knew it, you ARE a bad little girl. I growled, opening my mouth and delivering another scorching kiss, this time giving her a little taste of my tongue. After a good while, a few songs later, I decided to release the bride to be. But not before she had licked and sucked my nipples and bitten them like a hungry animal. She kissed my entire torso and back as I lap danced my most sensual and provocative moves. My ass was also to her liking and enjoyed fondling and biting that, too. No new bite marks, though, thankfully. Anna had taken all I could legally give her in front of her in laws to be and mother so I had other women take the hot seat next, each one getting to touch me anywhere and any how they wanted. I laughed and smiled and kissed and danced my ass off for each one of them and before I knew it, it was 1:30pm. Their party was going to keep going on after I was to leave, but no woman wanted me to go. They were all very nice and I received lots of tips, besides my fee of course. Goodbye, Edward. Anna gave me a big hug once I was back in my cop uniform again, my sunglasses off now, resting folded up in my shirt pocket, Thank you SO much for coming! We all had the BEST time with you! I may not want to get married now!

I hugged her back warmly, enjoying affection greatly, and kissed her cheek. Congratulations, Anna. I said sincerely, Youll make a sexy as hell bride. She giggled, 13 years old again, and kissed my lips briefly, smiling up at me. Bye. She looked a little sad to say it. Bye. I grinned back, waving goodbye to her mother who had hired me, also smiling from ear to ear at me. She had her hands on me more than her daughter did today. She just adored me after I flung her over my shoulder and acted like I was taking her into one of the bedrooms nearby, to have my way with her. No, I didnt have sex with Annas mother, or any of them. This was a bachelorette party, nothing like that happens here. But I did get lots of phone numbers, on the sly, and that was normal. I accepted them and smiled and said thank you, Ill be in touch, giving them a deep kiss afterwards. Future work, new clients. A chorus of goodbyes hailed down on me from above as I walked down the steps of the porch, returning to the street to catch the train back to Bellas place. I didnt run but I rushed. I didnt want to be late for my therapy with my gorgeous Dr. Bella. And I had a phone call to make at 3pm, as usual. BPOV When I got home, I heard the shower running. Smiling, I was glad he was here already. In only a couple days, I had to admit I liked coming home and having him with me, waiting. A big part of me wanted to go into the bathroom and yank that shower door open, maybe give him a little scare. That would scare the shit out of ME. Ever since I saw Psycho when I was eight years old, I had an eerie feeling being in my shower alone. I even preferred the glass doors instead of a curtain because I felt more secure being able to see what was out there while I washed. Not that I could DO anything to save myself if it ever happened, but still I was about to call out to him so he wouldnt get scared if he heard me out here but then his voice started singing. Nighttime sharpens, heightens each sensation Darkness wakes and stirs imagination Silently the senses abandon their defenses Helpless to resist the notes I write For I compose the music of the night. He sang like a dark angel, sounding just like Gerard Butler from Phantom of the Opera. I love this movie! And yes, I know it was a play, too. But I had only been fortunate enough to have seen the movie so far. This song is called, Music of the Night, I remembered. (If youve never heard this, go to youtube now and listen to it, its amazingly hot!) I sat down in my chair in the living room, listening quietly, smiling, and getting my notebook and tape recorder ready. His magnificent voice uncurled from the steamy bathroom like a black cloud of witchcraft, coming after my soul with its haunted melody.

Slowly, gently, night unfurls its splendor Grasp it, sense it, tremulous and tender Turn your face away from the garish light of day Turn your thoughts away from cold, unfeeling light And listen to the music of the night Close you eyes and surrender to your darkest dreams purge your thoughts of the life you knew before Close your eyes, let your spirit start to soar (he held this incredible long note) And you'll live as you've never lived before. (he breathed in song, so quietly) Is it getting hot in here or is it just me? I waved my notebook like a fan over my face, feeling tingly and sweaty suddenly. I tried to concentrate on the questions I had prepared for him, but I read the same one five times, still unsure what I had written there hours ago. Softly, deftly, music shall caress you Hear it, feel it, secretly possess you Open up your mind, Let your fantasies unwind In this darkness which you know you cannot fight The darkness of the music of the night Let your mind start a journey through a strange, new world Leave all thoughts of the life you knew before Let your soul take you where you long to be! Only then can you belong to me. (again, his voice irresistibly soft) Does he know Im out here? Is he singing to methose lines stuck out, sounding like he was referring to me - Open up your mind, let your fantasies unwind In the darkness that I know I cannot fight. And the part about leaving my life as I knew before, and letting my soul take me where I long to be.I wonder if Andrew Lloyd Weber somehow knew about Edward and I, years ago. I love the way he sang that last line Only then can you belong to me. He thinks he belongs to ME, but in reality, I already belong to HIM. Hey! Therapy session, remember, Dr. Bella?! Oh yea, God I am hopeless. Floating, falling, sweet intoxication Touch me, trust me, savour each sensation

Let the dream begin, let your darker side give in To the power of the music that I write The power of the music of the night You alone can make my song take flight Help me make the music of the night. He was humming the melody now and I felt my chest loosen as if clutched fingers had once been around it and were now letting go, slowly. He should be a singer with that fucking voice. I have to stop using the F word. Its so bad. Only since HES been here that word keeps creeping up in my thoughts and my mouth. He is a bad boy. And its rubbing off on me. But I will never forget this songand Edwards voice. Its a part of me now. I am trembling! I made notes of that in the back section of my notebook, where I wrote my feelings. Edward was the first half. I saw my hands acting on their own again, just writing - I adore him. In a daze, my eyes fixed on those words. In 13 days, almost 12 now, he would be out of my life. I would never see him again. Minutes went by but to me it was more like seconds. I almost had an attack when I heard the sudden voice of Edward behind me, emerging from the bathroom door. Dr. Bella! he said a little loudly, chuckling as I jumped, my head twirling around as he quickly moved over to the green sofa, sitting down on it today instead of lounging across it like a sexy human throw. Sorry. He grinned, running both hands back one long pull through his damp, towel dried hair. It looked dark, almost black from the water but with the sun shining on it so bright, the redness showed through it. He was wearing no shirt, as rule number one stated, and a pair of flannel black pajama pants, red lines going down and across the ebony pattern. Bare feet, as usual. He sat there, respectfully, trying to be good now, it appeared to me, after this mornings lecture. Am I on time? he asked, looking around for a clock. Yes, Edward, you are on time. I grinned. I love you. Okay I went to the front of the notebook and took my pen in hand, then leaned in and hit the record button of my tape machine, saying, Edward session two. Start off light for the first few questions, I told myself, looking at my list of questions for him. So, Edward, I grinned, peeking up at him from under my lashes, You enjoy Sponge Bob?

His smile spread across his face in slight embarrassment as he laughed, glancing out the window then back to me. I laughed, also, remembering it. You finally bring it up. He looked down at his feet, then back at me, I was wondering if you noticed. I notice everything. I informed, Thats my job, orwhat I want it to be, anyway. He scratched his cheek, looking at his knee for a moment. So? I prodded gently. I dont really WATCH it he explained and I could see he wasnt telling me everything right away, Ilike having it on. Listening to it, like, in the background sometimesrelaxes me. He shrugged, shaking his head a couple times and looking as if some internal thing was going on in his eyes, thinking over his answer. Cartoons are very pure. He added, Innocent. I like that That makes sense. His daily life is so impure, I guess, that when hes off work, he maybe needs to see something that contrasts the sexual darkness of his job. I took some notes quickly and said, I understand that. Do you? he said it rhetorically, crossing his arms and then uncrossing them. Uh oh. Im losing him already. He looked around for something to do with his hands, reminding me of myself. I never know what to do with my hands, either. Funny, he is as nervous now as I am when hes working his spells on me. We are like opposite sides of a coin. He took a magazine from the coffee table and rolled it up, tapping it quietly on his knee. Okay, good, hes got something to play with. You okay, Edward? I asked without pushing. Yes, fine. He grinned at me, Go on. Okay. I took a breath, Im just going to ask some quick things, just to get them out of the way, okay? Dont get upset. Alright. He looked curious. Have you ever beensexually abused, as a child? I clenched my jaw asking this, and then made myself look into his eyes. No. he smiled, liking the fear in my eyes, Im guessing. I waited, not saying anything, to see what hed offer next. The people who took care of me while my parents were away were great to me. Joseph, the head butler, was like a father to me. He loved opera and music and he taught me everything he knew about it. He taught me to play the piano and guitar. And then, there was Katherine, a wonderful woman who worked in the kitchen. She was my substitute Mom and I hung out in the kitchen with her a lot, helping her chop things and mix and cook. No one in the house wouldve ever done a thing to hurt me. They raised me. THEY loved me.

He stopped there and moved the rolled up magazine up and down over his leg, staring at it. Do you ever get to see them anymore? Joseph or Katherine, or any of them? I asked. They work for my parents. He looked at me sternly, then added, No. But they care about you, obviously. I pointed out, Couldnt they see you away from your parents house or something? Or call you? They work for my parents. He repeated, getting tense, I dont want them to lose their jobs. They live in the house, too. I wont get them fired, where would they go? Theyre not that young anymore, no. They would have nothing. Alright. I kept calm, seeing he was beginning to get a little more upset. If my parents could turn their backs on me and throw me out of their lives, theyd most certainly do it to any of their employees, dont you think? he pointed out. I see what youre saying. I nodded, agreeing with him there. Maybeyou could play something for mesometime? I asked, being Bella now and dropping the doctor part. His sad face turned relaxed and sweet in a second as he looked up at me. I would love to, Bella. He purred, Ill make it happen in a few days. Well go out. Smiling more, I loved the idea of sitting beside him as he played a piano for me. Youre a great singer, too, by the way. I blurted out, then felt my cheeks turn hot as I went back to my questions list. Thank you, eavesdropper Bella. He teased, smiling and playing with the magazine again. Picking another light question, I asked, Tell me about your friendspeople you are close to. Hmmm, at the club, theres Emmett, a good friend of mine, Jasper, another dancer there, hes a friend, too. We sometimes hang out together. Then Victoria, shes the red head who owns Fire, shes very close to me. She handles things for me. He stopped, looking as if he were thinking, then shrugged and said, I guess thats it. Great, other dancers and his Boss. They wouldnt be able to help extracting him out of this lifestyle. They were all stuck in there too. No one else? I asked, keeping my smile on, not judging. No. he looked up at me, almost ashamed. I took a note and then Edward cut in suddenly, I would rather have only three true friends than 100 false ones.

He thinks Im judging him because he only has three friends? I will have to set him straight there. I totally agree. I looked straight back at him, My best friends, Alice and Rosalie, are my true friends. Everyone else is really just kind of classmates to me. He looked down at his magazine and I thought to say something important to him, adding, And Edward? He looked up at my eyes, looking a little nervously at me. You can count me in as one of your friends. I said with a serious tone, meaning it, hoping he could hear that I wasnt just saying it, Okay? He smiled and looked down, looking happy and maybe touched by my words? Thanks, Bella. He turned his gorgeous, innocent eyes up at me and said, You can count me as your friend, too. I will, thanks. I almost felt tears in my eyes. Yes, I hope that was our first step towards trusting each other. It felt like a big moment to me. Heres a fun question. I joked, or tried to, Do you sleep with women and men? Or only women? Please say women only, please oh please oh please. His eyes blinked, a little surprised by my question and he quickly said, No, women ONLY. I dont do men or children. Women, 18 years and up. Thank you, thank you. What am I thanking God for? He still sleeps with tons of women for money, and Im relieved somehow? Do you ever use drugs or alcohol? I went on, wanting to get these questions out and over with. No to the drugs. He grinned, Alcohol, only occasionally, at a dinner, or party, a glass of wine, nothing hard core. Drunks and drug addicts dont look very good after a night of partying. And I couldnt do my job correctly if I was falling down drunk or high. And alsoits just wrongto me. It sets a bad example for.others. He was thinking something else but he didnt voice it. MAN! I wish he could open up more. But I was being impatient. He needs time to trust me more. Hes really doing very well being honest with me and all. I shouldnt complain. Good. I made a note, And you have noillnesses, or anything? I hate asking this shit. I hate James. He looked up at me, a smirk on his lips. I would not ever touch another person the way I do if I had any diseases or anything like that, Bella. He said without hesitation, Victoria checks us weekly. We are all clean. The minute were not, we lose our job. I use protection, always. I wouldnt do that to you, Bella. Pleaseknow that. I know. I said, actually really knowing it in my heart, James made me ask that. Sorry.

Whos James? Edwards brow creased. Oh, Dr. Collier, I mean, my teacher. I informed. Oh. I chose my next question Do you have a lover now? I dont know why I was afraid of the answer. And I began, looking at my notebook, gripping my pen tightly, Do you havesomeone specialnow, in your life? Like, a girlfriend or You are my girlfriend right now. He smiled, teasing it looked like, And yes, you are very special. Great. Is that his way of saying Im a retard that cant get out of her own bathroom alone? No, I meanbesides me. I kept trying, In your personal life? You can say, I wont get mad or anything. I told you, I dont own you. Its alright. No girlfriend. He exhaled a breath, Being what I amnot many women are okay with that. The women I knowdont want me around after theyre finished with me. And thats okay. I wouldnt date me either, if I were a girl. Why do you say that, Edward? I gave him an open ended question again, wanting more of his thoughts on this. This is important. He must know hes desirable and not just for sexual play for money. His self esteem is almost non existent. I wished I had time to build it up more with him. But it takes timeand we dont have that kind of time. He grinned and shrugged, Its true. You wanted truth. Im a whore, if I take a girl to dinner and we start talking, whats the first thing that usually comes up? What do you do, Edward? Then, I can either lie, which is wrong because the entire relationship is built on deceit, or I can tell the truth. One time, I did tell the truth and the girl threw a drink in my face and stormed out of the restaurant. That was the last date I had. God. The humiliation of having a girl throw a drink in your face in public. And what bitch woman did THAT to HIM?! I am getting to hate my own gender. They have really twisted this mans head in 100 different wrong directions. Do not help, James had said, just study and report. I sighed to myself and decided to proceed to a new question. Okay, heres a good one, I think. I chose one, Tell me some good memories you have of your parents. His eyes rolled up for a moment and he gripped the rolled up magazine a bit tighter. Why do we keep coming back to them? he asked, gritting teeth. Well, Edward I explained, Your parents are where your life began, even though youre angry with them, they are still important and They are nothing. His eyes turned cruel, almost causing me physical pain, They are dead. DEAD to me. I went to them, holding her in my arms and I

begged them to help her! I swallowed every bit of pride I ever had and BEGGED them like a dog, crying in the snow and they shut the door in my FACE like they never saw me before! He made himself unclench, seeing the fear in my face. In seconds, he calmed himself and took deep breaths, saying Wait. Give me one second. I didnt say anything and I didnt know what he was talking about and who this female was that he was holding as he begged his parents for help, but it didnt matter. Some poison had just leaked out of him and thats very good. He needed to get it out or it would eat him alive inside. It already was, obviously. You dont have to calm down, Edward. I leaned in, putting my notebook aside for a second, his eyes avoiding me as he stared down at his knuckles, Its okay to yell and scream if thats what you need to do. You can let it out, you wont scare me. Im not afraid of you. He let out a little breath of laughter. You really shouldnt have said that. Why not? I tried to smile and be kind and soft. I can never lose control with youor anyone. He said so sadly, sounding so alone, not looking at my eyes, My rageis like a horrible demon inside me. I have to keep it calm all the time. I cant let it out. I dont want to be a monster. And thats what I would be if I unleashed that. I wont do it to you, Bella, of all people. I can handle it, Edward. I lied, trying to sound strong and brave, You cant let yourself keep being a slave to that anger. It is consuming you. Do you want to talk some more about your parents, about what you just said? Can we go to the next question? he asked so quietly, still not making eye contact. Alright, Edward. I said, relaxed, picking up my notebook again, hoping to find a nicer, easier question in here for him now. I would return to this subject later. Heres a good one, hopefully. I never knew with Edward. Tell me about some of the jobs you had before you started working at Fire. I suggested, Was Fire where it all started? Yes. Edward looked less tense now, taking a breath and looking at my face again, Before that, after I had to leave college, there wasnt much I could do. My girlfriend at the time, stayed in college and I used to secretly sleep in her dorm room overnight because I had no place to live then. We quickly got caught and I was kicked out of there, so for awhile I was living on the streets. I worked a bunch of crappy jobs, having only a high school diploma. I made pizzas, I was a bus boy at Red Lobster, waiter at Dennys, food places mostly, because I could eat there. Its amazing what people dont eat and leave behind. I never seemed to go hungry for long, as long as I was working somewhere. And in the winter, I would just hang out inside wherever I was working at the time just to stay warm, from opening to closing. They usually didnt mind it, my bosses. So, really, Id only have to find a place to sleep after the place closed up for the night until the next morning.

I really missed my car then. I couldve slept in that and been kinda warm. But I found some places. Benches, bus stop cubicles, cemeteries real quiet there and dark. I got great sleep there. I was always clean, though. I couldnt take showers anywhere, but I could get cleaned up at a gas station bathroom, using my own soap and shampoo. I felt frozen in my seat. I thought this was an easy question and Edward was answering it without any anger or sadness, butI was incredibly sad for him and angry. How could his parents just throw him away to let him live on the streets? And how did his girlfriend, the love of his life, allow this to happen to him? If he were mine and threw away his life, his money, his car, his college, his family all for me I wouldnt let him do it. I would sooner let him go then subject him to all this! Had enough yet, Bella? he asked me gently, sensing my horror, and breaking the small pause in the air. I jerked out of my trance and said, Oh, no, Im fine. I was just thinking. Sorry. Edward grinned a little at me as I wrote for a second and I heard myself ask, What did your girlfriend feel about all this? With a small shrug, he looked away. She didnt like it, she hated it. He admitted, But thats the way it was. We couldnt change it. She even tried to dump me once but a couple weeks later, when she saw me still making pizzas and asked me about it. I told her it didnt matter if she dumped me or not. I was never going back to my parents or their money or their college. I begged her for a long time and she took me back. She loved me. He said it, almost as if to convince himself. I picked up on that. She loved me. Past tense. I know she did. I said warmly, and honestly. I would. I DO. And its probably more stupid of me, to be in love with whore Edward instead of that girl loving poor Edward. God, I sound like Dr. Seuss. Do you thinkmaybe today you can tell me her name, Edward? I went slowly here, I knew this was a painful part of him, the thing that had broken him enough to make him turn to the life he was living now. He exhaled breath again, and I noticed one of his hands were in a fist at his side. His eyes looked so solemn, struggling silently as they looked down at the magazine. I think he truly wants to tell mebut he is not ready yet. I am so sorry Edward. I dont want to cause you any pain, not in the slightest. Why am I doing this to him? I would rather slice my skin open with a knife than keep putting him through this. But this is my lifes dream, being a psychiatrist. God, what if this means Im not cut out for this career? But that worry was secondary to what I was doing to poor Edward. Its alright. I said, ending his internal battle, Not today. Its okay, Edward. Another long breath came out of him and his eyes looked up at me, again, shame there.

Thank you, Bella. He said softly, Im sorry. I am really trying I know it, Edward. I smiled at him, reassuring him, You are doing a perfect job, really. I mean that. Dont apologize. He breathed hard again, making himself slowly relax. I noticed he was very good at bouncing back and quickly recovering from his pain. He is just pushing it aside, over and over. Hes gotten quite good at it, I could tell from his facial expressions. So, your girlfriend kept going to college while you did all you could to make ends meetdid you ever feelhow did it make you feel, her being a student and youbeingout of school? He chewed a little on his bottom lip, unrolling the magazine now and rolling it in the opposite direction now. Maybe I was a little jealousI know that now. He admitted, We had a lot of fights during that time. I was a kid and wasnt fair to her. It wasnt her fault. I would wait all day and just come over to her room at night to spend time with her and she had other things to do. I would get so angry. She had friends and activities and study clubs in the library. And I couldnt be part of that anymore. I hated that. I was mean to her sometimes. I made her cry all the time. But she still stayed with me. She always forgave me. God knows why. She loved you. I stated, reminding him. He looked up at me with a heavy ache in his eyes, and made his lips smile a bit. Yes. He said, not adding anything more. I reached over and hit STOP on my recorder. Im hungry. I let him off the hook for now, Lets go get some Chinese food. Really? his brow raised as his lips began to turn up at the lovely corners. Really. I said, grinning, closing my notebook. I had lots more questions but this was a good start, enough for today. That sounds great. He smiled, standing up, I should change my clothes. I can do that fast. Wait here. He rushed into my bedroom our bedroom and I heard clothes rustling. He is too cute, hurrying like Im going to leave him if he doesnt move it. Oh, wait. He came to the doorway of the bedroom, looking a little tense, but dressed in blue jeans and a red t-shirt, the shoulders nicely exposed, I have to make a phone call. I always have to make a call at 3. It wont take very long, I promise. Is that okay? What did I tell you, Edward? I almost scolded him like I was his mother, You dont have to ask permission. If you have to make a call, make a call. Its fine. I can wait. He hesitated now, looking at me. Is it okay if he stopped himself, I should go outside and make it. Its kind ofpersonal.

He swallowed, looking nervously at me. I shrugged and grinned, having no problem with giving him some privacy. Its nice to see that some things for him were too personal to share with others. Theres a bit of hope there. But I couldnt help wondering who it was he was calling and what it was about. No problem. I smiled, Take your time, Ill wait here for you. Ill watch Sponge Bob. I teased, wanting his smile. Cell phone in hand, he did smile at me, growling and muttering something under his breath. What? I chuckled, turning my head at him as he went out the door, closing it behind him. Nothing ! Be right back. He almost sang it, grinning pleasantly. I watched Judge Judy for about a half hour and then Edward was entering the apartment again, announcing, I am all yours, fair Bella. Lets go. Switching off the power, I smiled and grabbed my purse. Yay, Im starving to death! I over emphasized, reaching him as he took me by the hand, leading me out to the street below. We cant have that, now, can we? Edward smiled, You must feed, you will need your energy tonight. And he pulled my mouth to his as we came to a halt on the street, random people moving around us as he opened his lips and closed them over mine, and he tasted like strawberries now. YUM! After he broke the kiss, we were on the move again. I giggled, unsure what or if he had anything planned for me tonight. Oh, who am I kidding, he most likely does have something planned. I felt so nervous suddenly, but also, elated and anxious. It was fun, being on the subway train with him. We were standing, holding onto the silver pole, leaning back and letting our bodies spin around, then clash into each other as we laughed. After a few minutes of that, I held the pole and he stood behind me, his body stuck to the back of mine as he had his arms around my waist, holding the pole with both hands, sealing me in his arms. Move your hair. His voice was in my ear as I giggled and jerked my head, the locks of my hair falling off my shoulder. Thats it. He growled, Good girllll. And his mouth came in with heat and wonderful wetness, kissing under my ear, slowly trailing down my neck, taking gentle, erotic bites, driving me wild already. Whispering into my ear between his kisses, he said, Look at everyone watching you, Bella. They are so jealous of me right nowKISS. BITE. And theyre fantasizing about you. KISS. Wanting to undress you like I do. BITE. LICK. Uuuhhhh I closed my eyes and felt my knees weaken a bit. Feel this? his sexual, hot voice groaned in my ear and I felt him move my body hard against the pole, pressing his hard erection right against my butt as I let a

little moan escape my lips, looking around immediately at the people all around us to see if anyone was really watching us. Yes. I whispered, feeling the thrill of not only his penis pressing into my ass but also the pole was pressing right between my legs, hidden from most eyes because of Edwards hands on the pole, holding me in tightly. Look what youre doing to me, he growled again, sounding unpleased about it. BITE. KISS. LICK. A dark, wicked part of me wanted to reach my hands up and grab his hair while he just took me right here, pounding me into the cold pole, in front of everyone, bruising my pelvis as it thrust over and over again into the metal, thudding obviously and intrusively. His hand fisted in my hair and he pulled my head back a bit, Exciting, isnt it? Me controlling your body in the middle of a train, with all these witnesses? Say yes. Yes. I confessed, to hell with the consequences. He was so good already at breaking down my inhibitions. I feel like Im turning into a whole different person and its only been less than 2 days! I am working on him during my timeand he most definitely is working on me during his. God, he is talented. I wish I was as good at my psychiatric questioning as he is at his job. Yes., he dove in to ravage my neck with his teeth and tongue and rough lips. My gasps and panting grew louder but I strangely didnt care. Edward was making me feel so good that I began to block the people around us out. His hand roamed over my ass and squeezed it, even gave it a little SMACK against my jeans as I yelped, surprised, but not angry. Then his hand moved over my breasts, over the t-shirt, still pressing me into the pole, holding me hostage there with his rock hard body at my back. It didnt look like many people were paying us any attention, but my mind began to wander in paranoia, thinking everyone could see us. How the hell am I going to resist him? I was going to maybe make Edward wait a couple more nights at least before I made love with him, but if he keeps doing these kinds of things, theres no way I can make myself wait! Yes, I had already decided to give myself to him, despite my brains warnings. Maybe he knows what I was thinking. DAMN! Hes gonna think Im so easy! I want to be different from other women hes known, butIm only human!! I need thismy body needs this. Im too weak to resist him. Such a good girl he purred, whispering as his hands moved up and down the sides of my hips, curling in and rubbing my butt cheeks again, Youre behaving sooo nicely, not giving me any resistance at allIm so proud of YOU, fair Bella Edward was doing a good job with me on my sessions and I was glad to know I was being equally behaved during his sessions. My mouth and brain couldnt form words at the moment, all I could so eloquently say was, Ohhhhhhhhh.. and gasp.

Everyone is drooling over youwatching me feel you up like a little bitch in heat right before their eyes his voice moved like smoke into my ears, so low, so sexual and deep, Theyre all wishing they were methey can almost see me in their mindsbending you over the seat, yanking your jeans downKISS. BITE. LICK. ..shoving my cock deep inside you and pounding you OH, SHIT!! This boy can TALK!! His voice is doing things to my body!! I had no idea hearing something could make you so wet and hot!! I exhaled a deep breath, closing my eyes as my body trembled harder. Againand again he growled in my ear, Taking youmaking you scream while everyone just sits here and watches you being fuckedno one will help youno one will stop me from having you, Bella. His hand wrapped once around my long hair, holding my face up a bit, the pole between my breasts as he pushed me gently against it. Mmmmmm Edward purred, looking down at me from his point of view, So sweetand innocentthe way you shiver and blushit just makes me want you all the moreI want a peek at the little slut inside you Oh my God I was panting and felt the wetness between my legs right now. Fuck God, youre in my clutches now, little girl he was so wicked and hot I wanted to rape him right here and now. What is he doing to me?! Im not like this!! Am I ?! I told you, I love bad boys. And Edward was doing a wonderful job at being bad right now. I didnt know he had this side to him. He is just full of surprises! God might have mercy on you, but I wont. he whispered deeply into my ear, taking a firm bite on my earlobe as I clenched the pole harder, my fingers reddening. The door opened on the train and Edward grabbed my hand, pulling me behind him, getting out of the car and into the platform area. This is our stop, lets eat! his voice went right back to normal in an instant, and he was dragging me behind him up the platform stairs, towards the street. BASTARD !!

7 Hearts are not to be had as a gift. Hearts are to be earned. W.B. Yeats EPOV As I led Bella up the subway stairs to the busy street above, I heard those heavy breaths of surprise and frustration. Maybe it was because only a moment ago, I was her dark captor on the train, and now I was hungry boyfriend, rushing her to a little Chinese restaurant I know. I hope she didnt think I was just kidding. Oh shit, maybe she does. I did just flip my whole personality in two seconds. Fuck. How am I gonna tell her thats just how I am? I hurt her feelings, FUCK!! FUCK!! FUCK !!

I decided to explain more to her once we were sitting down and waiting for our food. I had to say something to fill the void. This is the best Chinese place in New York. I informed, although I didnt really know that for a fact. I just liked it there, myself. It isnt fancy looking or too large, its not crowded. And the food is great. Oh yea? she asked, rushing to keep pace alongside of me. Oh yea. I stated in certainty, My treat. No, I have she began and I knew she would but I talked over her. Cant hear you, Bella. I put my hands both over my ears now, Bella keeps talking but I cant hear herLA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA!!! I love doing that to girls. I stole it from Eddie Murphy Beverly Hills Cop. Brat. She said, dropping her protest as I took my hands off my ears and smiled down at her, taking her hand again. She smiled back. It doesnt appear shes angry with me. Good. I felt my chest sigh in relief involuntarily. I hate anger. Bella looked very comfortable once I showed her what door to enter. I pushed it open for her and she looked relieved it wasnt a swanky, posh looking restaurant. I had guessed right, she preferred normal, not lavish things. 2 points for me. I would still take her out for one luxurious night of swank, I decided. She deserved it but I wouldnt give her two whole weeks of it. It would make her uneasy and more nervous so I had to avoid over-doing anything that would make her feel that way. Wanna sit over here? I offered, going to a little round table in the corner, a big black room divider beside the table with a large red dragon sprawled across it. Sure. She came with me, still letting me hold her hand. We sat down , menus in the center of the table. I handed her one and opened mine, it was a paper menu with only two pages inside. So, Bellado you see anything that youve been hungering for? I purred, knowing this would earn me a peek at that cute little blush she does so often. And there it is. I smiled and lowered my eyes to the menu, keeping my snicker to myself. I didnt want her to think I was making fun of her or enjoying making her nervous. Just the opposite, I want her to come back at me with something just as naughty. But I had just begun with Bella, maybe, in time, she would come around and tease me back. She cleared her throat and I saw her peek up at me over the edge of her menu. But then she made herself concentrate on what she wanted to eat and she chickened out on me. Uhh. She frowned a little, trying to remember how to read as I chuckled, watching her closer now, The---- l -lo m-mein, (clears her throat harder) the shrimp lo mein looks good. And I like pepper steak.

Poor little Bella. I hope once we make love she can relax around me more. Making love I call it. It sounds so sleazy saying once I fuck her. Besides, I could call it making love with Bella. She is so rare and honest and cute. I dont know if she could call it making love from her end. Im a well paid hooker to her who needs therapy. I know I dont or cant love Bella in the sense that I could marry her or anything. That part of my life is over and I wouldnt impose myself on her by ever falling for her, but if I were a normal, real manI would go after her. But I am not real and I am not a man. And I can never have her. Just do your job, Edward, and make her as happy as you can and then go. Stop thinking love whenever youre around her. Girls dont love whores. Youd only make a complete fool of yourself if you really did fall in love with her or anyone else for that matter. The one you love is somewhere else, far from here, dont forget that. And thats all you have, thats all you need. Focus. She is counting on you. I know, I mentally answered my inner voice, I know. Perhaps after Bella, I should start turning down younger women, I considered. Its easier to stay unattached with the older ones, they dont cling onto you and blush when you compliment them. And a lot of young girls do become attached to me, especially the virgins. When you give a woman that first taste of passion, they fall in love with you, unwillingly, stupidly, devastatingly. I know Bellas not a virgin, but close to it. 33 seconds. In my book, she is a virgin. My first time with her had to be soft and sensual, like the massage was. But maybe I can make it a little more exciting for her, somehow. I would love to have her outside somewhere, the breeze touching our bodies. But in New York, finding a secluded outside spot was like finding books in Paris Hiltons apartment. Yes, I have been there. No books. But lots of toys. Thank God I didnt have to talk to her, much. See, I will do anyone. But I am getting off track here. Oh, yes, find something to order. Food, remember? Yea, yea, yea. That does sound pretty good. I answered her, But I like things dangerously spicy. My usual is General Tsos chicken with broccoli. She winced, smiling, Ouch. Too hot for me! Oh, come on, you can try a bite of mine. I smiled, closing my menu, giving her my full attention now, reaching over and taking her free hand into mine, resting against the table between us, You might like hot, Bella, if you gave it a chance. I got her eyes and her bigger smile now, and she put her menu down. Yes, Bella, come on, say itsay it out loudsomething evil and sultry. You can do it. I am on the edge of my seat. I want to try it she said softly, But what if it burns too much? Oh, not bad. I smiled back at her, stroking my fingers over hand. I brought it to my lips and kissed it with real feeling. She wants me but shes afraid. I wonder if its physical pain or emotional pain shes talking about. It wont burn too much. I said, seriously, giving her my honest eyes, I promise. Ill be good to you.

She rubbed my hand with her thumb, gently, her eyes a little sparkly now. I know. She said, sounding so sincere. It seems like she wants to trust me, even though she shouldnt. Besides I wanted things to turn light now, I know where your ice cubes are if things get too hot for you. She laughed with me and turned a nice shade of burgundy then. I let Bella order her own food and I gave my order. Some women like me to take charge and order their food for them, the ones who like me to be dominant and controlling over them. But this was not Bella. Not yet, anyway. I want to play that game later in our relationship, if she allows me. Brat. She finally quipped, taking a breath, and I could see she was relaxing now. Good girl. So how did your appointment go today? she asked, trying to make conversation. She was looking right into my face and I hesitated, not knowing how to respond. Do I tell her about it? Will she get jealous? Edward, you can tell me. She read my mind, Actually, I would like to know more about your appointments and things. It would help my study. And I know you dont mind talking about sex. Hmmm, maybe she is more observant than I thought. Okay, if she wants to know, I have no problem talking about this. Okay. I folded my hands, glancing away for a second, then I brought my eyes right to hers, knowing this would probably blow up in my face. Well, I had a bachelorette party today. I began, I went as a cop. I love being a cop. The bride was very nice. They were all pretty nice. Andit went well. Bella stared at me and smirked. God, you so left all the good stuff out. Alright, Bella. I smiled, ready to unleash the whole story on her. I told her every detail of how I entered the house and obtained my bride in her chair, cuffing her. Bella smiled at this and listened with huge interest. I started dancing and once I got my clothes off, the ice was broken. I was saying as the waitress, a chinese woman with short black hair in her 40s came over, brining our sodas to us. Bella turned bright red but I kept right on talking, ignoring the waitress glance at me. I rubbed my penis up and down her body and that usually gets my little bride hot and stoked to begin with. I said as Bella blocked her eyes from the waitress, her red face turning deeper red now. I think the waitress was lingering too long at our table just to keep hearing our conversation. Bella glared at me and sliced the air with her hand, as if to tell me CUT or shut up. But I didnt. And once I put my mouth against the crotch of her jeans, she was mine. I stated casually. I took a sip of my coke from its straw and swallowed, continuing my story.

Once the waitress was gone, everything seemed alright with Bella. She laughed and listened to my stories, she asked questions. Ill bet she was wishing she had her trusty notebook with her now. When our food came, I was almost finished telling her all the things I had done at Annas house and it didnt look like she was getting mad. My friends were the only other ones I could talk like this to. Then I remembered, Bella is my friend, too. And now, Im sure of it. They made you into a sundae? she giggled as I took my chop sticks out of the paper, snapping them in two and taking them in my hand. Yea. I grinned, They came up with that on their own. They laid me on the table, on some towels and put all kinds of ice cream and cake, whipped cream, and hersheys syrup all over me. Then they all sat around and started using spoons to eat the ice cream off me. It started out nice and lady-like at first, and then they were all on me at once, licking me and squirting more whip cream and syrup on me, and licking it off again. It was fun. They didnt bite, so, I was glad for that. In my mind, I remembered Anna, the blushing bride, covering my mouth with chocolate syrup and devouring it with hers, licking and groaning into me. Bella was holding a fork and breaking the sacred law of Chinese food at the same time, but I let it go. It was nice having someone to tell my day to, and she wasnt getting upset or disgusted with me. What are you thinking while thats happening to you? she asked in a nice way, not judging. I gave a little laugh, answering, Mostly Cold, cold, cold! Thats during the ice cream part, when they were all scooping different flavors out and dropping them on my body. Then, later, when they were licking it off, I was thinking, Thank you, thank youwarm, so warm. And then, later on, I was thinking, God, Im sticky! Bella chuckled at me during my answer but now she just stared at me, grinning, saying, You know what I mean, Edward. Dont play dumb with me. I grinned back, taking a bite of my chicken with my sticks while she twirled her fork into her noodles, placing them carefully into her open mouth, licking her lips quickly, afraid to have good all over her mouth with me sitting right across from her. Girls are like that. But I would love to see Bellas mouth all messy and shiny with sauce. I would lap it up in a second. But wait back to Bellas question. What is it youd like me to say? I asked with an extremely pleasant tone, even giving her a small smile, That I was thinking, please, someone help mesave medont touch me? I used a small wimpy voice as I said those phrases and wondered what Bella would make of this now. I guess, something like thatI dont know. She muttered, going back to her food. I dont have any of those thoughts anymore, Bella. I said, not ashamed to admit that, I shut those off a long time ago and now, I dont even have to think about it. Theyre just gone. I dont know exactly when it happened, but it did. I dont feel shame or modesty. Lucky. Bella said in a low voice, I wish I could lose those.

No you dont. I said sternly, and she looked at me, silently asking me something with her eyes. I took a sip of my drink and made myself take a breath, adding, Dont wish that. Alright, I take it back. She smiled, and got my smile in return. I ate for a moment then she asked me, sounding more curious than analyzing, What do you say whenthey are doing that to you? Are there like, lines you always use, ordo you just say whatever comes to mind? I usually go with what comes to mind. I replied, Using the same old lines on people just takes all the real-ness out of it for me. And, this time, I didnt have to say anything, I was gagged. She stopped in mid bite and glared at me. Gagged?! she half-shouted, sounding shocked. Then she looked around, hoping no one heard her utter that word. I nodded, chewing. With what? she probed further, making herself whisper now. If I could blush, I might have. I leaned in and whispered back to her, copying her, A banana. Oh my G she looked around, blushing, whispering lower, A banana? Peeled? I almost laughed, what difference did THAT make? No, unpeeled. I answered honestly, Its better that way, it doesnt get so mushy then and it stays hard longer. It wasnt all that planned out, I just went to yell out for a second when the ice cream hit mycrotchand one of them said, shut him up and before I knew it, there was a banana hitting the back of my throat. I guess I couldve spit it out easily enough, but they told me to keep it there. And you did. She finished for me, staring at me, almost like I was an alien. Shrugging, I nodded and bit my bottom lip for a second, taking another bite of my chicken. You are justamazing to me. She said, drinking through her straw. I like watching her suck on it. God, my mind is constantly in the gutter. No wonder she looks at me like Im another species. Maybe I am. I smiled and began to steal pieces of her shrimp off her plate, popping each one into my mouth as she tried to guard her precious seafood from me. HEY YOU! she protested with a giggle, Ever heard of boundaries? No, never. I teased, taking another one. Punk! she squealed, unable to keep me out with her defenses. Here, Ill give you a bite of mine. I offered, taking a medium sized piece into my chop sticks, No hands, just open up.

She pinked a little bit in the face and let her hands sit at her sides, opening her mouth slightly, leaning towards me. Damn it, Im hard now. God, I hate my dick, its the easiest bitch in New York. More. I demanded with a crooked smile as she obeyed, Good little Bella. Here you go. I placed it inside with care onto her tongue and she began to chew it. I watched intently, and then a few seconds in, she began to widen her eyes and rush to drink her soda, drinking a lot of it. I chuckled, Oh noBellatoo hot? I laughed for a second more as she finally let go of her straw and panted a little. Wowvery hot she shared between her breaths. Sorry, baby. I truly apologized, I thought youd like it. But at least you tried it. Im very proud of you. And that reminds me She looked at me, blankly, a deer in the headlights. In the next couple of weeks, I began, looking at her food, then to her, There are going to be thingsthings I would like us to try. Nothing too wild, but, I think we should talk about it first, and agree that you are alright with it before I perform it on you. Like, lets just say right now, if you want me to stop, I want you to say the wordslo mein. This way, you can still scream no and struggle and have fun while were playing, but Ill know you dont really want me to stop. She was red now but smiled at me. Thats for later, in our time, if we ever get to that level of play. We dont have to, if you dont want to. Like I said, its all up to you. Maybe you could even write down for me before you leave for school, just one line, something youd like me to do with you that night. Hows that sound? I see you dont like to SAY what you want, so perhaps that will work for you better. What do you think? After a long pause, she finally spoke and whispered, I like those ideas. Thats veryobservant of youand nice.Edward. I pleased her. YES! And I was still hard as a rock, why did I say scream and struggle ? That always wakes up Eddie Munster. I wanted to get to that rape fantasy scenario with Bella. Bad. But I knew Id have to wait a little while to get to that level of trust with her. That game takes real trust on her part. And she was still very nervous and shaky around me still. I would have to wait a bit. When she no longer shakes or stutters around me, I will start to plan that game. Hey, you know, I just realized aloud as I ate, I never asked you any questions today. Bella tensed a little then made herself loosen. Ah, maybe she is learning something from me after allrelaxing. I wondered when youd remember that. She sounded caught, as if she had done something naughty, Go ahead. I had been running some great role play plans in my mind with her but needed some more information before Id spin them into realities. I shouldve gone

slower but my brain forgets about normal people sometimes, and since Bella had been talking to me so openly and freely earlier, I just forgot to be delicate. Have you sucked cock before? I asked as she was sipping her soda. A horrid choke sound erupted from her throat and she spewed out a spray of coca cola at me as I felt myself fly back a bit. Her face was purple and she was covering her mouth with one hand now, the other hand patting herself in the chest to loosen up whatever was killing her. BELLA!! I got up and went behind her, slapping her back lightly, Bend over a littlegood. I kept rubbing and smacking her back until finally, after a minute, she quieted and started to breathe normally again. Her eyes were wet and she wiped them with her napkin, blushing again as I leaned in to look closely at her face, Are you alright? Yes, Im fine. She muttered quietly. The waitress, the only other one in the room with us now, was standing a couple feet away, concerned. Shes alright. I said to her, Thanks. Maybesome water, for her? Thank you. I reluctantly took my seat and looked at her, feeling so horrible. I almost killed her with my cock question. I wonder if that would stick in a court of law. Honey, Im sorry. I purred, meaning it, Are you sure youre alright, Baby? I am fine. She gritted through her teeth, grinning at the waitress who gave her a glass of water. Sorry about that. Bella looked at me with embarrassment, See, this is why I wished my shame away. Its okay, I like you this way. I informed her honestly, It was my fault, I shouldnt have asked soquickly like that. She took a deep, cleansing breath and peeked up at me, smirking a little, and then began laughing at herself. I love that. She is really a cool person. I like Bella Swan. So much. I laughed, too, for real. You owe me a new shirt. Look what you did to me. I now looked down at my shirt with the dark dots of soda splattered everywhere as I wiped myself off with my napkin. Im sorry. She giggled, helping wipe me off, almost standing to reach me. I dont forgive you. I teased, laughing too, You will have to make me forgive you later. Oh yea, how am I supposed to do that? she played a little. Good, Bella! I raised a brow at her, Oh, Im sure you have your ways. I am starting to suspect youre not as innocent as you seem after all. Theres a little harlot in there just dying to get out. And when she does, I think Im going to be in a lot of trouble.

She just laughed at that remark and began to eat again, this time being very cautious. So, are you going to answer me? I looked at her, taking a sip of my own coke, waiting. Ummm Bella looked away at the empty tables behind me, Yes. Is that all Im going to get ? Yes? Would I be able to just answer yes to one of your questions, Dr. Bella? I asked, knowing the answer to that one, Be fair, Bella, elaborate please. She exhaled. I have had a coupleboyfriendsduring high school. I didnt want tosleep with them, I wasnt ready. ButI didperformoral on a couple of them. That made them stick with me for awhile, until they found someone else whod do more. So.yes. She looked as if she just admitted to molesting young children. Her head dropped into her hands and she couldnt look at me now. Hey. I half frowned, staring at her, Hey, look at me, Bella. She looked into my face and I gave her a warm smile. Dont be ashamed, Bella. Nothing you say will shock me or turn me off or anything. Okay? Thats our agreement. I will open up to you and you can open up to me. Alright? Im glad youve done things, its good. It means youre alive and sensual and I love that. And Im glad youve done that particular thing. It gets me hard thinking of you doing things to me. Did you like doing it? Just say it, dont hide. Yes. She answered, smiling at me like a little girl, so proud of herself. I felt my mouth smile back before I knew it and I purred, Excellent. I had another question now. I have a follow up question. I warned her, taking her soda away and placing it next to my end of the table, then I took her fork away. She was giggling at me. Then I asked, Swallow? I did, I have nothing in my mouth, you can ask it. She giggled at me some more. No, my question is swallow? I made my eyes turn smoldering, to give her a hint. The lights went on inside her eyes and she covered her mouth, shocked again, laughing. After a few seconds, she nodded. With a sly smile, I handed her soda back to her and her fork, not saying any more on this subject. I didnt want to murder her. See, youre not that innocent. I joked, purring my words at her. She stuck her tongue out at me then, the perpetual child. Dont stick that out unless you plan on using it on me and dont make me think up little girl fantasies, I dont like those. I feigned sternness, pointing at her. Why not? she asked.

I just dont like them, thats all. I was almost finished eating and didnt offer any more information to her on this. Change the subject. Dont let her get near this. So, my next question I decided to change things all the way around, away from this spot, Do your friends know that you bought me yesterday? I asked this smiling and in a joking way. Oh God she shook her head, smiling as she ate, Yes, I told them. Then she looked scared suddenly, looking at me, Oh God, is that allowed? I didnt mean towill it get you into trouble? Shhh shhh shhh! I stopped her, then smiled, Its okay if they know. I dont mind. She looked so relieved and went back to eating. You shouldve heard them. I never knew that side of them before. What side? I let my eyes widen at her, acting shocked, What did they say? I hate even repeating it. She avoided my eyes, eating, I thought theyd call me names or something but instead they just kept asking if they could play with you, too. I laughed, not surprised at this. I was often shared by two or three women, them all being girlfriends. I was asking because I wondered if maybe she was fantasizing about sharing me with those two girls. Lots of best friend groups had this fantasy. It was really embarrassing. Bella peeked up at me again, I guess it really shows what people are really capable of, deep inside, when you work in thisbusiness. You must always see the inner parts of people, doing what you do. It bothered me a little, seeing my friends like that. I swallowed my coke and moved my jaw a bit, loosening rice out of a back tooth for a second, I see women clearly, if thats what you mean. The good, bad, and ugly. Women dont show their true selves to their boyfriends or husbands. But I see them. She looked me over closely and took a minute to ask, Which one am I? I gave a chuckle and smile at her, then honestly replied, You are the good, Bella. She blushed and looked down, then raised her eyes back at me. What do you really think of me, Edward? she dared herself to ask. Wow. What a brave question. I mean, no bullshit. She said, surprising me , You can say anything you want, justI can take it. I want to know. I sat back in my chair, folding my hands and resting them on my chest, letting her stew for a moment while I let my eyes wander over her. She waited, endlessly, as if she were being mentally tortured.

You are good. I began, But you want to be bad. Not very bad, just slightly. You think of yourself as plain and nothing extraordinary. You prefer being in the background, behind the scenes. You hate lots of attention. Youre very smart and that scares you. Your brain keeps stupid boys away so you believe yourself undesirable. You are extremely sensual and curious and want to explore your desires but have not had a chance to do so. You are warm and loving. Your body is gorgeous. You always smell incredible. Your touch is soft and shy, and innocent. Your voice is deep and throaty and sexy as hell. You make noises that make my body ache. And, Bella, there is nothing plain about you. You are desirable. She had tears in her eyes, hearing my assessment. She said nothing but just looked at me in wonder. Oh. I added, And you are a klutz and talk too much. She laughed and so did I. And it was wonderful. Well, thats true. She giggled. Its all true and you know it. I sat up and took a sip of my drink. Wow. Bella couldnt say much at the moment, her mind working behind her eyes, How do you know Im a klutz? This morning I said casually, when you tripped over my shoes and landed flat on your tits. Her mouth fell open and I couldnt hold the laugh in for long. It burst out and she joined me. I thought you were asleep! she hit my arm, already into beating my poor little body. I was until that! I chuckled, But my favorite was, watching you crawl to the bathroom naked. That was a Kodak moment. Oh shit. She hit the table, embarrassed but letting me laugh. I hate you. She blushed and pretended to be mad at me. Awww I tried to get her legs in my legs under the table, You do notdont say that. You hurt my little feelings! Good! she squirmed, trying to free her legs from within mine as I grabbed at her kneecaps, tickling her. Be nice to metell me Im the greatest. I said, toying with her. NO! she laughed. Tell me Im hot, come on, tell me how much you worship me, I can handle that kind of criticism. Come on. I prodded her. NO! LET GO! she squealed and laughed. I was really squeezing her kneecaps now, making a mental note. She was very ticklish here. Say it. I demanded, Say it!

ALRIGHT! she squealed, Alright, I worship you, youre VERY HOT! I WANT YOU, OKAY?! I released her, getting my answer. Was that so hard? I asked, Jeez, I gave YOU a whole speech about yourself and I get nothing. I was teasing her and I thought she knew that. Then she said, You are impossibly fastand strong. Your skin is ivory white like marblebut warm. I know thats probably becauseyou dont go out too much into the sunlight. You hide yourself in dark places: clubs, dungeons, bedrooms. Your eyesare a wonderfully strange emerald color Ive never seen before. They change colors. When you laugh they look lighter and sparkle. When youre sad or angry they get a little darker. And the way you speaksometimesits likeyoure from another world. You have had so much pain, sometimes you look like youre 100 years old inside. How old are you? My voice almost didnt work. Everything she was saying about me was true. But she was leaving all the bad of me out and we both knew it. She would say it soon and I braced myself to take the impact of it. Twenty-six. I answered, my voice sounded scratchy and hollow. She looked at me with sorrow in her eyes again and took a breath, going on with her inventory of me. You think your only worth is in your face or your body. She went on, You think there is nothing inside you. You think very little of you. You long to please everyone else except yourself. You are in a lot of pain but you smile and laugh and play. You wear a good mask. But thats only to keep people away. You dont want a girlfriend. You use your profession to scare them all off. Even that girl who threw the drink in your face. You mustve said your profession to her in a purposely vulgar way to get rid of her, because maybe you found yourself liking her a lot and that scared you. You are funny and sweet. Your voice is beautiful. Itdoes things to me. You sing like a sad angel, the most beautiful song I ever heard came from you, in the shower. You long for family. You are a loyal and true friend. And(she hesitated a second)you are worth so much, Edward. You are priceless and unique and special. I wish you knew that. And I dont want to share you with my friends. I want you all to myself, for as long as I can have you. I hate it when people hurt you. I want to save you but I dont know how. I love the way you look at me and touch me all the time and I love the way you hold me at night. I love your kiss. And I want to give myself to you. And its not because of your body or your perfect face. You are beautifulinside and outside. I just sat there, lost. For once I didnt know what to say. It took guts for her to say all those things. But I already knew she was brave, taking a strange man into her home, into her life. I wanted to cry but I turned that right off, not wanting to show her my emotion, the depth of my feelings. Whenever I did that, I got hurt, worse than any whip or chain, and I just didnt have anymore tolerance for this kind of pain. On the outside, I can bruise and bleed and thats okaybut if I take one more hit to my heart I dont think I can make it. Internally, my hands were up, in self defense, protecting my broken, closed up heart. Women like Bella are the most dangerous of all, the most lethal. They make you fall in love with them and then they ruin your life. They dont mean tobut they do.

Oh. She said, And youre a brat, a shrimp thief and a fan of Sponge Bob Squarepants. We both looked at each other and burst out laughing. We laughed for a long time. We sat and didnt talk for a few minutes. A lot had been said by both of us, too much. But, still, it was nice to hear. Even if it wasnt true. Bella? I asked, not hungry anymore, I want you to promise me just one thing, okay? Dont get mad. Sure. She smiled back at me, pleasantly. Please dont fall in love with me. I tried not to plead as I looked into those amazing eyes of hers, Promise me that, please. She looked at me with this strange look that I couldnt read. She huffed, Im not in love with you, Edward. I just wanted you to know what I think of you. All that I said is true. I told you Im your friend. I breathed a sigh of relief and grinned, Good. I mean, I thank you for all those things you said. I appreciate all of that. But it wouldnt be good for youto start to havethose feelings for me. Dont misunderstand. I meant all the things I said to you, too. I do want you and I cant wait to experience all the things you want. And I do love belonging to you, like I said. I know, Edward. She smiled, looking fine, I love having you. Good. I repeated, feeling as if a weight had been lifted off me. Shes not angry with me, thank God. The waitress came over and asked if we wanted any dessert. Bella said she was stuffed and so was I. I paid the bill with a generous tip and then she placed two plastic wrapped fortune cookies in the center of our table, wishing us a good night. Oooh, I love reading my fortune. I smiled brightly at her, seeing her return it to me. I unwrapped my cookie and closed my eyes, being my child self to cheer Bella up after our heavy words earlier. She was unwrapping hers now, slowly, watching me act like a 5 year old kid. I broke it open, opening my eyes and slipping out the little line of paper, holding it to my chest. You cant read it, its private. I teased her, she had been leaning in, trying to look at mine, Just read yours, little girl. Brat. She mumbled to me, cracking her own open as I peeked at my paper fortune. It said: Love is the only medicine for a broken heart. Okay, why did my entire stomach just drop in one blob into my intestines? I feel like my chest is being stretched out from the inside. Its only a stupid fortune cookie, for Christs sake! Breathe, Edward. Bellas POV:

I opened my fortune cookie, hoping for a little advice with my problem here. I had just promised Edward not to fall in love with him but I was already there. After not even two days. Then I had to act like I wasnt in love with him in the slightest and that took some doing on my part. I hope he bought it. Then I hoped he didnt. I hate my life. About three things, I was absolutely positive: First, Edward was a prostitute. Second, there was a part of him and I didnt know how dominant that part might be that thirsted for my body and planned to do things to me, lots of different things in these next 12 days. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him. I need help, fortune cookie, help me. Mine said: The one you love is closer than you think. My brow creased and I felt it as I thought over what this meant. I know how close he is, hes right in front of me. But does it mean that hes emotionally closer to me than I think? Or is this just talking about geography? Stupid fortune. EPOV Did you get a good fortune? I asked her, she looked confused reading hers. Yea. She looked up at me, grinning, I guess. What does yours say? Is it good? Uh-uh. I played, holding mine to my chest, You tell me yours and Ill tell you mine. She looked at it and read, A thrilling time is in your immediate future. Oooh, I smiled at her as she blushed hard, It KNOWS whats in store for you, Bella. And its so right. Okay, spill. She looked at me, a small grin there, Whats yours say? Uhhh I looked at mine, trying to think of something else to say instead of what was actually written there. I didnt want to read it and have Bella think the way for her to cure my battered soul was to love me. That was crap and I didnt want her to love me. My life is a toilet and Im a piece of shit . She deserves so much better than me. She likes me now because Im pretty and I gave her seven orgasms nothing more. Do you need help reading the big words? she teased, laughing at her own joke. I looked up and smiled big at her. That WAS a good one. I had to laugh, too. Go, Bella. No, I can read it. I stalled, It says, the time is right to make new friends. She smiled wider. See? It knows whats good for you. And its so right. She amended my statement a moment ago.

Shall we go, fair Bella? I stood up, getting her chair for her as she stood. Sure, thanks for dinner. She said as I slipped my fortune in my pocket, planning to save this for myself. A little souvenir of my first date with Bella, a real date, my first successful date in 7 years. Anything for you, Bella. I said without thinking about it as I took her hand again, leading her back towards the subway.

8 EPOV On the way home on the train I began to discuss some ideas I had for Bellas first time with me. We sat side by side and I whispered in her ear, my hand touching her waist. Tonight? I asked. Yes. She answered, whispering back into my ear. Are you sure? I asked in a very hushed voice, I can wait as long as you want. I CAN?! Thats my penis talking again. Shut up, Eddie. Go to sleep. No, I am ready. She said with no hint of hesitation or fear, I want to be with you, Edward. Im not afraid. You dont have to treat me so fragile. Im not a virgin and I know what I want. And its you. I want you tonight. I was so glad to hear that. I want to treat Bella gently and carefully, as she is new to all this but at the same time I want to have my way with her and play games with her, too. When we got off the train and ascended the subway steps, it was pouring rain outside. Bella stood there, like she was going to wait for the rain to let up before going out there, but I couldnt wait. I grabbed her, flung her over my right shoulder, and ran out into the wet streets, beginning the 10 block walk back to her place. We were getting soaked and Bella was screaming and kicking pretty hard, but I couldnt stop laughing. I felt like a kid again, somehow. Only a happier and more carefree kid than I ever was before. Being with Bella is so easy. When we got there, it was already beginning to get dark outside, with the rain clouds dark and gray overhead. I was going to let her walk up the stairs on her own, not knowing if she had a fear of heights or anything. She was backing away from me, dripping wet and giggling as I slowly moved up the stairs after her, clutching at her cold, wet shirt. It was sticking to her body in all the right places. I wish she wasnt wearing a bra. I love wet nipples through a t-shirt. I got close enough to grab her lips with mine and I delivered an intense, halfrough kiss, grabbing her hair in both fists, trying to control my strength with her in my claws.

She yelped and fell back on the carpeted red step and I laid on top of her, pinning her under me there as my wet hair rained down upon her. Great idea, Bella, I growled, Lets do it right here on the stairs. Uhh, NO. she turned bright neon red, pushing me off her a bit, I dont think Mrs. Nevitz would appreciate that. Come, wicked. She got away from me and ran up the stairs now and I growled and chased her, matching her speed. She screamed, laughing as I caught her and flung her over my shoulder again like the caveman I am. If she was trying to escape, she was being bad and now I had no problem carrying her up the stairs to her tiny room in the tower. Screaming a little more, she grabbed onto my shirt in back, crying about how she doesnt want to fall. I guess I understand why youre so nervous. I said calmly, moving up the stairs, holding onto her securely. She would never fall out of my arms, but I said, Your view of that long drop down the stairs cant be pleasant at all. Poor little Bella. EDWARD!! she yelled, kicking her legs a little bit as I got to the top of the stairs now, going to her door. I used my key and opened the door, kicking it open as I brought my girl inside. Well, at least I carried her over the threshold. Thats romantic, isnt it? The thunder boomed suddenly but she didnt pay any attention. To me, it seemed like the demon everyone calls God was up there, angry, trying to warn Bella what the penalties are for fucking a whore. But the moment we got in the door we couldnt keep our hands off each other. I pinned her against the wall in the kitchen, kissing her hard, getting her eager kiss in return. We shouldve been shivering and cold, being so wet, but I felt warmand getting warmer as I felt Bellas hands yank up the wet shirt that clung to me. I moved back a step, letting the shirt pull up and off me, breaking our kiss for one second, but then my lips came back to hers even stronger, slamming her back into the wall again with a dull thud as she moaned out loud. She whimpered as I returned the favor. I wanted her shirt off, too, but didnt want to lose her mouth on mine so, I just tore it down the middle. It was too easy. She yelped as I threw the wet ball of ruined shirt to the linoleum floor and began to search for the hook to this goddamn bra she always insisted on wearing. I swear, Im going through her drawers tomorrow and hiding all her bras. In back. She panted, in between kisses. I got there fast and unhooked it without any trouble, knowing my way around these things. I yanked the bra off as she moaned and I grabbed her hair again in one of my fists, the other hand on her breast, squeezing and clutching in pure need. It was completely dark in here, only the occasional flashes of lightning revealing each of us to the other as I lifted her up a bit, curling her legs around my hips and holding both my hands under her sweet, wet ass, carrying her to the bedroom as she kept kissing me with all the passion I accused her of earlier.

Dont stop kissing me I breathed in between her deep, hungry mouth. Never.. she panted back, filling my mouth with her tongue as her hands dug into my soaked hair that hung over my left eye a bit. I got her to the bed and we both fell onto it, her on her back and me on top of her. Her legs opened and I grabbed for the button of her jeans, opening it and moving the zipper down fast, yanking the right side down roughly as she moaned and yelped, sounds that were fast making me an animal. This was wonderful but not the way I wanted our first time to go. So I had to change things a bit, for her sake. Bella. I said, hardly getting the word out between her kisses, I want you in control tonight. Hmmm? she wasnt listening much, her legs wrapped tight around my hips and her pelvis was raising up and down, pushing against my stiff cock. Its you tonight. I said, moving to my knees on the bed and pulling her jeans off. She laid there, smiling up at me as I used both hands to slide up her little cotton panties, giving her hair there a nice stroke as she made this little kitten sound, and then I slid them down off of her, her cute feet moving up and out of them at last. I unbuttoned my jeans and slid them off, revealing my black cotton bikini underwear as she smiled more at me. I took these off, too, tossing them to the floor and coming back in towards Bella. I kissed her again, with all the energy I had before and her leg was curling around my waist again. No, no. I gently scolded, smiling, Bad girl. Come here. I moved her so that I was laying on my back now, in the center of the bed, and she was on top of me, sitting on my hips. My hands will stay right here at all times. I informed, holding onto the ivory porcelain headboard, a design of roses and vines there, You are in control, Bella. THIS time. Do anything you like to me. This made her happy and I had a feeling it would. I was sure her first time, the 33 second marathon was all about him just being on top of her, sticking it in and bouncing until he came and then pulled out and left her totally humiliated and unsatisfied. This experience would be very different for her. I closed my eyes, a pleasant smile on my lips as I waited for Bellas touch. I would surely be taking charge and would be in control in our next few encounters, so it was only fair that this first time, I let her hold the reigns. It would also tell me a lot about her, letting her drive. She moved over for a second, but didnt get off me yet. I peeked at her and she had my red t-shirt, folding it into a long rectangular piece. Smiling and leaning down, she kissed me gently and then laid the shirt over my eyes, not tying it behind my head, just letting it sit there, hiding her from my view.

I love this so far. I shared happily. Some women scare the shit out of me when they blindfold me, snipping scissors near my ear, striking matchesRaven once sharpened knifes near me when I was blindfolded. But I trust Bella. With her, Im not afraid. Before she did anything else, she dropped small, sweet kisses onto my lips, my chin, the dent upon it, and over every inch of my face, even my forehead. Edward she said as she kissed me, You are not a toyyou are not propertyyou are a wonderful, beautiful man and Im not talking about what I SEE. I mean YOU. I dont own you buttonightyou DO belong to me. Is that clear? I felt her crawling up my chest and then her legs were on both sides of my head, a wonderful aroma lingering above me close by. Yes, Bella. I replied, my voice deep with feeling as my lips turned up at the corners a bit. I hope she cant hear it in my voice how much I love what she just said, false though it may be. I waited for her to say something more now, I wish she would just say Lick. Or something like that, but her little girl tongue wouldnt allow her to utter such things. Her voice only said loving and understanding words. Again, I made it easy on her but in the future, no more leniency. She would learn to voice what she wanted before my time was up here. I took one small lick, teasing her as she exhaled a sharp breath. I felt a little tug on the headboard and pictured her hands holding onto the top of it for support. Be good, Edward. She said in a very quiet voice, You dont want to be punished, do you? And her small laugh let me know she was playing with me now. Yea! I took another longer lick, then stopped again, trying to stop myself from laughing. Alright, Edward, thats it. She warned one last time, No Sponge Bob for you tomorrow. Mmmmm I made a little noise of protest and plunged my tongue up above me, finding soft, warm, wet skin, so delicate and thin and pulsing as I moved my mouth and swirled my tongue hard. Greedy little girl. I guess seven orgasms werent enough. I think Im creating a monster here. But I couldnt be irritated with her. She was getting what she wanted and I was very proud of her. I wanted to see her do this more and more as time went by. Mmmmm!! I growled and hummed as I was sucking and nibbling, making sounds for her as she was screeching and moaning and screaming for me. It was a beautiful duet we were doing together and I didnt want it to end. I would lick her all night again if thats what she wanted. Oh God, YES!! she was yanking at the headboard, tugging it as she threw her head back a bit, her legs starting to go, against her own control they vibrated and

convulsed beside my face as I kept moving my tongue as fast as I could, right in that spot along the side of her clit that she loved so much. Ohhh, yes, EDWARD, YES!! she screeched and heaved breaths like a hurt tigress now, DONT STOP, DONT FUCKING STOP EDWARD, PLEASE!! I love when women get this hot, they curse like sailors. Especially the innocent ones who never curse like this in their everyday lives. My hands stayed trapped in the headboard, and I lapped at the warm, milky juices that were slowly flowing from my goddess. I moaned right out, loving her taste, it was so much sweeter than most other women Ive known. I wonder what her secret is. It must be something she eats. My Bella was coming hard now and I was glad. I kept kissing the sensitive lips above me as she began to relax and come down from her orgasm. She yelped and flinched away, so sensitive to the least little touch now. The blindfold was taken from my eyes then and I felt her wiping off my face, my mouth. She smiled down at me and held the t-shirt over my lips for a second. Mmmm. I made a little sound beneath it, pleasure and helplessness at the same time, turning my eyes smoky and heavy on her, wanting her but unable to beg for her right now. Your turn. She smirked and returned the blindfold over my eyes as she moved down my body, kissing places along the way, her wet hair trailing wetly down my skin as she went. I waited as if it took 100 years for her to get there. My fingers tightened around the hard edge of the headboard where I was holding it. I felt her soft gentle hand curl around the shaft of my cock and begin to slowly move it up and down. Uuuhhhhhh!! I groaned hard right away, arching my head back as my spine curled up a bit also on its own. Now I was panting and squirming like a girl, trying to be still and calm, but failing miserably. Do you like it slow she asked softly, moving it slower as I moaned some more, Ordo you like it fast? And then she was jerking me up and down at a much faster pace, making me want to scream. BELLA. I winced, my arms shaking hard, trying not to let go of the headboard. Well? she made her hand move slower now, Which is it? I couldnt decide. They were both wonderful. And all the while, I knew it wasnt what Bella wanted to hear, but, I wanted whatever SHE wanted. Maybe she is right about one thing. I dont even have my own opinion anymore. Hmm. I want to hear what YOU want, Edward. She said, If you dont tell me, Im going to stop and we can go back to therapy session time. No, no! I whimpered, trying to decide what I liked more. Well, then, tell me. She pushed, You have ten seconds.

She was doing it faster now and that was driving me wild. But slower will let me last longer and she can maybe lick and suck me during slower. Five seconds Bella warned. Slower, slower! I chose and felt a little hot and sweaty now. Good boy. She moved slower as I panted and put her lips right on the tip of my penis, sucking for one second and licking a drop of moisture from the head. I growled out in lust as she went MMMMMM in appreciation, liking the taste of me. Moving me up and down in a very slow, smooth motion, she finally asked me, Would you like me to suck you, Edward? No, not really. Lets go play checkers instead. YES, I WANT YOU TO SUCK ME!! Yes, Bellaplease I breathed hard, needing it now, like air. Teasing me, she began taking small licks up my shaft just like I had done to hear earlier. She is paying attention, I have to give her that, and now shes doing the same exact things to me, showing me what its like. Fast learner. My eyes were closed, even though the shirt was covering my eyes. Please, please, I prayed to Bella, my goddess, please do itits so sensitive all of a sudden, usually it takes a lot to get me so wired and frenzied. But Bella had made me that way in a few moments. Please I whispered, groaning and clenching my teeth as she took a huge, long lick up the entire side of me, circling her tongue around the head and sucking her lips hard around it as I shouted out, without words, turning into a mindless thing, just reacting to the stimulation and velvet roughness of her tongue. So big she said softly, I hope I can do a good job here. All I could do was grunt and groan as she kept moving me up and down, licking and sucking only the head at the moment. It was killing me with pleasure, the head is super sensitive and she was teasing the hell out of it. I wanted to yell at her to take me into her mouth but I bit my bottom lip, holding it in. I guess Ill put you out of your misery, Edward. She said caringly, and a second later her mouth was all around me, wet, hot, tight. Sucking, licking, stroking. SHIT!!!! I moaned and panted, my eyes opening wide against my will as the redness of my shirt stared back at me. GOD! DAMN! IT ! I heaved as she moved her mouth and tongue up and down a bit faster now, the pumping with her hand continuing at the same time. Then I felt her other hand cupping my balls. She was killing me and I loved it!! I guess here, in this department, Bella knew what she was doing. See, its always the quiet ones BELLA!! Bella! I sneered through gritted teeth.

She ignored me and kept working me like an expert, moving up and down harder and harder now, my entire shaft in her mouth. Every so often, I felt my head hit the back of her throat and I half-screamed out from that raw sensation. And I could hear her sounds while she was pleasuring me, small gags, moans, MMMMMs, all pushing me further to the edge. Oh fuck, Bella, Im gonna cum! I sneered, warning her in case she wanted an out before that happened. Some women dont care to swallow. But this made her go FASTER and harder! I shouted out in my most masculine sounding voice, waitingfeeling my whole body convulsing in ecstasy and lust. I felt myself explode hard and hotly and I stiffened, hoping this wouldnt disgust Bella. But instead, I felt a rush of new pleasure as her mouth kept sucking and her throat swallowed me down. And she started licking and sucking the head now. NO GOD!! Too fucking sensitive now for that. I writhed and bucked as I growled and then Bella gave a soft laugh, stopping that and laying beside my legs below, her lips placing kisses up the cuts of my pelvis. God. I moaned, still limp and feeling weak, but in a glorious way. Did Ido alright? she asked, as innocently as a 1st grader. Who does she think shes fooling? No, that was terrible. I joked, I just came like that because I felt sorry for you. She laughed and pinched her fingernails in my inner thigh. OW!! I laughed, almost taking my hands off the headboard, I was kidding! Kidding! Yes, you did alright. Fucking amazing, Bella! I dont think Ive ever come so hard like that ever. Really! Well, you deserve it. Bella replied, not taking my blindfold off yet, I wish I could give you six more like that, like you did for me. Seven. I corrected, Ive given you eight now. Thanks, Mr. Count It. She said, stroking between my legs with one hand. Youre welcome, Mrs. Suck It. I quipped, smiling and trying to get my breathing to calm a little more. Can I lay down on you? she asked. Always. I replied. She climbed up and laid her warm, naked body directly on top of mine, her breasts two hot circles pressing into my chest as she laid her head down under my chin. Her hair was still wet and cool but that felt good against my red hot skin now and I could feel her wet little pussy against my satisfied, sleeping cock. It wouldnt be very long before hed awaken again but I didnt know how to tell Bella this. A few minutes was all he needed, unlike a lot of men who usually needed 15-20 minutes. Yes, Im a freak. Franken-cock.

I am starting to see why people always shove things into your mouth. She picked on me as she relaxed there upon me, You talk a lot, too, like me. I grinned, Well at least Im not asking you if you need to go to the bathroom. We both laughed for a couple minutes and she said, I like the way you scream and grunt. It turned me on so much it made me go faster and harder than Ive ever gone before. You inspired me. Thanks, I think. I wished I could hold her but I had not been released yet by her words. Uh oh. Bella said, moving a little, Someone is already back up. I could feel my penis all standing at attention again, ready for more. Sorry, Bella. I began quietly, Its just Shhhh. She put her finger over my lips, Stop apologizing. I dont like it. Shes stealing my lines now. What a little thief. I smiled, unable to stop myself. Yes, Bella. I said in a deep voice. Im going to let you see now. She informed, taking my shirt off my eyes. The one light on was soft and dim so my eyes didnt need much time to adjust. Bellas body looked so beautiful there above me, so perfect. I might need your help, Edward. She whispered shyly, straddling me. Can I have my hands, Bella? I asked, wanting to help with all my soul. Oh, yes, she made a confused face for a second. I let go of the headboard and sat up a little bit, Come here., I said and took her lips with mine again, thanking her for making me feel so fucking alive. I took a fistful of hair into my hand and made it a long, deep kiss filled with emotion. When I let her hair go, she opened her eyes, looking a little dizzy. I smiled and asked, You alright? She nodded and blushed and grinned at me. I rolled to the side of the bed and went into the nightstand drawer, where Id put my condoms. I tore the foil with my teeth and slipped it on quickly with no problems. I could do that in my sleep. Victoria is the only woman I could never use a condom with. She couldnt have children and she said she only slept with myself and Emmett. I would have questioned her about that but it was a rule of hers. Victoria didnt like condoms and if I insisted on wearing one, I was out. And Victoria had saved my life, I wasnt about to give her a hard time over it. I want you, Edward. She finally said the words, Right now. Yes, Bella. I grinned, ready to be her teacher, Have you ever been on top before? No. she said with no shame.

Alright, its easy. I assured her, Straddle me. She blushed again, doing it, her pussy a bit in front of my erection. Move back a little bit. I guided, Get yourself right over me. I held the base of my cock and watched her timidly position herself in place. Good girl. I said approvingly, Slowly let me insink yourself down One of my hands stroked up her outer thigh as she obeyed my instructionsmoving slowlydowndownuhhhhhh, my head is inpenetration.yes.CHRIST, she is TIGHT! She wasnt lying to me about that. She let out a little moan and whimper as she let me impale myself into her hot wetness. It felt like my cock was being squeezed as she reached all the way down to the base. I am inside hercompletely. Paradise. Wait. I took her hands, wanting to just feel myself there, without moving, without anything distracting from this awesome thrill. We fit together perfectly. Thats the only thought I had in my head at the moment and I couldnt argue or push it away. She was making delighted sounds, also, maybe feeling it, too. Alright, Bella. I let her hands go, placing a kiss on each one, Hold the headboard for leverage and at any pace you like, you can start moving up and down. My fingers touched the back of her bare ass as she began to ride me, going slowly at first, taking her time to feel me and savor her own feelings at the same time. Ohhhh yeaaaaa I growled, letting her know everything below her in Edwardville was happy and conent, Ohhh, Bella. Edward. She breathed, Im doing okay? Flawlessly okay. I winced, biting my lip again, almost tasting blood, You are so wet and tight, youre killing me, Bella. But its SO good. Dont stop. About fifteen minutes later, she was riding me pretty hard and I was thrusting up inside of her, clutching onto her ass and helping her move deeper and harder as her knees started to shiver a little. FUCK BELLA, FUCK !! I was shouting, bucking my hips and slamming her ass up and down over my balls, the pounding sounds of the mattress battling the squeaking of the headboard as Bella moved it with her hands, breasts bouncing and mouth screaming right along with mine. 33 seconds. Not a very hard record to break. Ohhhh!!! Bella was screeching and slamming herself down, EDWARD!! OH MY GOD, EDWARD!! I was sweating and so was she. I could usually go longer than 15 minutes, but, she was so tight that I knew I couldnt hold out much longer. Hot little BITCH!! I heard my voice snarling and heaving as she pummeled me harder. Yes, I can curse like a sailor when Im hot also.

She was screaming so shrill and with no words that I suspected she was coming again. I was not far behind her. UUGGGHHHHHHH!!!! I screamed out, feeling myself streaming into her, well, into my condom, actually. I couldnt move for a bliss-filled minute. I was panting and exhaling like an animal that had just run 10 miles as I eased Bellas ass upwards, slowly, my eyes clenching as she raised all the way off of me now. I gasped in relief and utter joy as she laid down beside me, in the crook of my arm that curled around her tight, holding her to me securely as we both fought to breathe, wordless and suffering side by side in the sweetest torture imaginable. We were two quivering, wet, sweaty messes, but we clung to each other desperately, neither of us wanting to let go. After about ten minutes, after I had slyly disposed of the used condom, I asked, Sobeing on top wasgood for you? God, yes. She breathed, moving her damp hair out of her eyes, kissing my nipple and playing with it with her finger. Good. I reached into the nightstand drawer, I think youve earned a little treat, then. Lay back. She smiled up at me and frowned, confused. But she did as she was told and I showed her one of my favorite little things. It looks like a small little oval-shaped plastic egg, but very small. It has a thin wire coming out of one end and that it attached to a little palm sized white box. This is a brand new toy of mine, Bella, and its just for you. I informed first, Its not hard-core, its very small and not scary at all. See? Its just a little tiny thing. Care to try it? Alright. She looked curious, parting her legs a bit. If you dont like it, just say so and its gone, okay? I asked, kissing her mouth three times in a row. Okay. She closed her eyes and relaxed, trusting me completely now. Youll like this, though, I suspect. I assured, Now, when I put it on, its gonna make a little buzzing sound, but thats okay. Edward, Ive heard of vibrators before. Bella opened her eyes and smirked at me. Alright, shut up, before I stick something into YOUR mouth. I grinned, turning the dial in my hand to low to begin. I placed the tip of the oval egg right into place, right above her little wet clit. It buzzed away, and Bella began to react right away. I smiled down at her, my leg curled around her right leg, keeping her legs parted a bit, not letting her escape it. She was moaning and gasping, opening her wide eyes at me in disbelief.

Told you youd like it. I grinned over her, then concentrating on where I was placing the little egg next. I moved it slowly, finding different spots where I would stop and let it sit there, buzzing and vibrating away as Bellas screams began to intensify. I increased the speed at times, then decreased it others, making her yell at me while I laughed to myself. I would bring her almost to orgasm then lower the speed at the last moment. Three times I had done this and finally Bella was screaming at me. NO!!!! she howled, EDWARD, NO!! PLEASE!!! PLEASE!!! She clutched at my arms and I sternly held her down. Behave, you little bitch. I put a hand over her mouth and smiled at her to let her know I was playing with her, Youll take it and be quiet or Ill put you over my knee. Youll come when I say you can come. After a couple more of those teases, I did let her come and come she did. HARD. Over and over and over again. She was soon screaming like a banshee after an hour of the little vibrator and then I yanked her up by her hair, getting her onto her knees, turning her ass to my hips. Time to make that fantasy of being taken from behind come true. I announced as her hair fell half over her face, my new condom in place as I bent her over and thrust myself inside her again, her screams like music to my ears.

The next morning, at about 7:30am, I brought Bella breakfast in bed. I woke her up with kisses and petting and although she looked very happy and exhausted, she was also very hungry, too. We sat in bed naked and ate like pigs for about an hour and then she said she had to shower and get ready for school. Today she would be home around 4pm she said. Which worked perfectly because today at 12pm I had a pizza delivery with Paige. I felt like a low-life shit going there today after last night with Bella. I wished I could blow off these day jobs during these two weeks I was Bellas but Victoria would tear my balls off. And I had endured Victorias wrath before. It wasnt pretty. Victoria got a small cut of whatever I earned but it was more about her reputation than just the money. Plus, she wanted complete control of her employees. If she said it, we had to do it. Or we were out. And I just cant be out. I need all the money I can earn. Working at Red Lobster will not pay the hospital bills. Well, Bella did always say I could do what I liked while she was in class. I feel like Im cheating. I dont like this. I FEEL myself getting attached already. My internal brain shouted at me like a drill sergeant. Do NOT get attached, CULLEN! Do your job and stop acting like a BITCH! ALRIGHT! I shouted back inside of me as she got dressed. I sat on the bed, wondering if I should tell her or not. She was very cool about the bachelorette party, but this was different.

Hey. She smiled at me as she put her shirt on, Are you okay? Yea. I snapped out of my coma, smiling up at her, I justhave another appointment today, at 12. Is it okay if I go or do you want me to stay here? No, go. She rolled her eyes at me, going around the apartment and putting her notebook and things into her backpack, Stop asking me all the time. I told you, I dont own you. I know but She leaned in, kissing me deeply before I could say anything else. Kneeling on the bed, she grabbed my hair and wrapped her arms around my neck. I got six more baby kisses after that and Bella stared down at me with a loving pair of eyes. Last night was justmagic, Edward. She got all misty eyed as she spoke and I felt my own eyes begin to water, too. Youve ruined me for anyone else, you know. She informed, kissing me again and I felt my arms tighten around her waist, my hands rubbing up and down her little back, touching the bottom of her hair. I didnt know what else to say in response but my voice almost cracked when I said, Bella Im not in love with you, thats not what Im saying. She assured me, looking away for a second, then kissed the tip of my nose, Im just saying thatyou wereI cant even describe it. Im just saying, when Im old and gray, and sitting with my bald, fat husband watching Hollywood SquaresI just know Ill be thinking of youdreaming of last night...and how good you feelhow you make ME feel I felt my throat clench up and silence me. I dont know what Im saying, Bella smiled, tossling my hair, You no doubt fucked my brains out last night and now I have to go to school and try to THINK. No fair. Bella, I have to I began, about to tell her but a knock pounded on the door. Oh, theres the girls! she giggled, squirming out of my arms and darting off to answer the door as my eyes closed. My head hurts. Why? Bella knows what I am, she bought me! Why is this bothering me now?! I was wearing only my underwear when the girls came inside. I was sitting on top of the messed up quilt and sheets when they crossed the big open doorway of the room. Bella, did you study for the quiz on Alice was asking when they stopped and stared into the room at me. Rosalie was not talking, either, but smiling at me with a raised brow when I realized I was being looked over. Hi ladies. I perked up and smiled affectionately at them, not bothering to cover up or anything. HiEdward. Rosalie was gawking now and then Bella rushed over and grabbed them by their arms.

Gotta run, were late! Bella shouted, getting her friends eyes off my body, as I stood up and followed, wanting to say goodbye to Bella. Alice spun around at the doorway and saw me standing there in my small white bikinis and her voice dropped five octaves lower when she exclaimed, OH MY GOD! Bella. I said low, not able to lose this feeling in my gut. I felt awful. Wait outside for me, guys, thanks! Bella said, throwing them out and closing the door behind them. Whats the matter, Edward? Bella came over and held me, laying her face on my bare chest, Do you feel alright? Yes. I held her too, But theres something I should tell youabout today. What is it? she looked worried about me now. Come on, Bella!! Rosalie pounded on the door as I frowned at it, We have to study a little bit before class!! I know YOU didnt have time to study last night! I frowned, looking down at her, Did you have to study last night and you didnt? Its not a big deal. Bella looked down, Its only a little quiz. Bella I growled, not liking that, I can wait for you from now on. If you have important things to do, you should do them first and then you can have me all you want. Alright? Alright. She smiled up at me and I grinned down at her cute little mouth. Ill miss you. I heard myself saying to her and immediately regretted it. Way too attached. Maybe its good that Im doing this pizza thing today. It will refocus me. Ill take a shower, Ill get back into my routine, and this feeling will go away. You will? Bella smiled up at me, as I gave a weak smile, Ill miss you, too. I should go, Ill see you at 4, okay? Bella began to move towards the door, the girls still pounding for her. Okay. I gave a nod. Oh and for tonight Bellas eyes lit up, I have a little plan. Ill tell you after dinner, alright? Alright, Bella. I tried to smile more. Be good. See you later. She waved and opened the door, leaving me. Go to work I ordered myself and I went to the shower, washing all the wonderful scents of Bella off my body, feeling colder now, even though I was standing under steaming hot water.

EPOV

I stood on her doorstep, holding my pizza in its box. My cap said Johnnies Pizza and I wore a t-shirt and jeans, underwear, and sneakers. Swallow. Breathe. Ring the bell. I did and waited. I had been here before. This place was a mansion, but very empty and cold. After I rang the bell for the third time, the door yanked open. And there was Paige, a 40 year old woman now, still attractive with only a line or two at the corners of her eyes. Long blonde hair, flawless make up, perfectly manicured fingernails, wearing an expensive long silk robe, black. She also wore a very large diamond ring and a wedding band. Pizza delivery. I smiled, about to hand the box over to her when she held the door open for me and turned, walking back into the huge, expensive looking house. I stayed where I was, waiting to be paid. Come in, kid, I have to get your money. She called behind her and I entered, the wooden door closing on its own after I stepped just inside the doorway. She was standing in her kitchen now, purse in hand, digging, looking for her wallet. How much is it? she asked, sounding bored. $12.50, Maam. I answered, politely waiting, placing the pizza on the long wooden island in the center of the amazingly large kitchen. Rip off if you ask me. She muttered, taking out her wallet, Its always fucking cold by the time you get it here. Im sorry, Maam, I brought it right over, it should be hot. I began a little nervously, my eyes intimidated. How much would you like to bet she turned to me, her eyes annoyed, that its ice cold again? I gave a slight frown and looked confused as she yanked open the top of the box. The cheese wasnt melted or even remotely hot at all. It was stone cold. Feel that. She challenged me. I looked at it, then her, swallowing, looking more nervous now. Carefully, I put a finger on the edge of it. I winced. Cold? she raised a haughty brow at me. Yes Maam. I looked down a little, Uh, let me return it and Ill bring you back a real hot one. I began to walk towards the door but she grabbed the back of my shirt and yanked me back over to the island, slamming me over the pizza as my eyes widened. What are you doing? I tried to straighten up but she grabbed my hair, sticking my face in the pizza as I yelled, trying to struggle a tiny little bit.

Now if that was a HOT PIZZA, your pretty little face would be burning! she yelled, But its COLD so all that means is that youre getting all messy! Maam, please! I tried to straighten but she held me down. My face was very close to the pizza now, but not touching. Only a little sauce was on my mouth and a little on my cheek, I said Im sorry. Please, let me get you another I am so sick of being screwed by people! she sneered, taking a sharp knife out of a wooden block a couple inches away from my face. She put it near my cheek and said, Give me your hands and if you try to run, I stab you in the face! I put my hands behind me, shivering a little as she opened a drawer nearby. Maam I began, Please, Im not trying to screw youI just deliver pizzas. SHUT UP! she shouted and I felt duct tape being coiled around my wrists, about five times around, then she bit the tape and tore it off, securing my arms. Get up! she yanked me to my feet by the hair as I cringed and felt her throw me into the wall, my back against it. She grabbed a large silver pair of meat scissors and grabbed my throat with her hand. What do you do instead of delivering my pizza on time, kid, hmmm? she moved the tip of the scissors along my jaw, What do you do, watch me take my shower? Is that it? No, Maam, I swear! I made my face look terrified. She opened the scissors and placed them under my balls as I screamed out. Her hand clasped over my mouth and she whispered, Admit it. I know you watch me. She took her hand off my mouth and waited. Alright. I clenched my eyes, I saw you showering and I watched. The whole wall is made of glass! Well, you bought more than you bargained for, kid. She took the scissors and began to cut a straight line up my t-shirt, ripping the rest of it off me as I panted and trembled. What are you doing? I asked. Giving you what you wanted. She put the scissors to my chest, Hold still. She stabbed the scissors into the wooden island and turned back to me, undoing my jeans and unzipping them. She took off my cap and threw it onto the floor. Oh God, please dont I frowned, breathing heavier, Im so sorry, please Shut up I said. She ignored me and pulled my jeans down to my ankles, then retrieved the scissors, opening them and sliding them into the side of my underwear, making a long crisp cut as I exhaled a hard breath. Then she cut the other side, taking the ruined garment in her hand and smiling at me while I stared back in fear. Open. She danced the scissors around my throat.

I opened my mouth and she stuffed the underwear inside, all of it as I protested in muffled discomfort. Look at thathard as a rock., she grabbed my cock in her hand as I groaned out through the cotton in my mouth. Stay. She frowned at me in disgust and got the duct tape again, tearing off a nice long strip. I closed my eyes as she stuck it over my mouth, my lips completely hidden now beneath the silver strip that also ran along the entire lengths of my cheeks. Mmmmm I tried to make noises through my gag. Paige likes that. Sounds like begging her to let me go, making my eyes very afraid. Yes, beg me. She squinted her eyes at me, Thats right. Ill listen to that while Im sucking you dry, you little pervert. Mmmpphhhh!!! I protested as she bit my nipple hard and dropped onto her knees, savagely sucking her mouth over my cock, even scraping it with her teeth as I stood there, eyes clenched, making muffles shouts and sounds of pain and protestand pleading. After a short while, she grabbed my penis and led me out of the kitchen. I muffled arguments through my gag as my feet, trapped by my jeans, could only move small little baby steps after her as she dragged me out to the dining room. Come on, follow me, sweetie. She cooed sweetly, Shhhh, dont be afraid. Ill let you go when Im finished with you, I promise. MMmmnnnn I said, yanking my face to the left, trying to struggle as much as possible as she brought me to the fancy mahogany table in the dining room. She untied her robe, taking the black silk belt of it and putting it around my neck, making a special knot so that when she pulled it tight, it would choke me a bit. Therevery pretty. She moved her hand over my face and down my chest, pinching my nipples as I muffled a little scream and tried to look away from her, still resisting a little. Now she opened her robe and let it fall to the floor. Her body was fit and firm, plastic surgery on the breasts, definitely. She laid on the table, on her back and pulled me forward, between her opened legs by my leash as I choked a bit, moving closer. She remembered the rules, and sat up, taking a condom off the table and opening it, rolling it onto my ready penis as I tried to plead and beg again through my underwear gag. Nono!! I tried to resist through the cotton in my mouth and throat. You are going to fuck me now, pizza boy. She demanded, If I cant have hot pizza, I can at least get something out of you. She yanked my leash and it tightened hard. NOW!! she ordered angrily. I got all the way between her legs now and inserted myself into her wet, ready pussy as she moaned and I muffled out a small whimper.

Come on, thats it. Do a good job for once and maybe Ill let you go., she put her feet up, resting them on the table as I moved myself back and forth harder, my hands still behind me the entire time. Im glad I work out everyday and have good hips or else this would be near impossible for some men. Oh, YES! YES, YES!! she was soon screaming out, taking it as hard as I could pound it, Yes, fuck me harder, HARDER! SLAM me.you hot FUCK, YES!! With Bella, coming was very natural and easy for me. Right now, it was a little more difficult. But that was good news for Paige, it meant I had to keep fucking her until I came. It was a good half hour of her screaming and yanking the silk around my neck before I felt myself getting there. I kept thinking of Bella from last night and that was helping me a lot. I imagined it was her on the table as I rammed into her over and over again, almost angrily now, wishing I would just come already so I could get out of here. I let out a strangled, muffled cry as I felt myself ejaculate and seconds later, Paiges screams quieted then ceased. Mmmmmhhhhh.. I groaned, slowly pulling out of her with a little shiver as she smiled up at me, relaxingnot moving. Mmmm, pizza boy she purred, touching her breast, slowly sitting up, pulling me back closer to her by my leash. She wrapped her arms around me and kissed my chest for a few minutes. I made myself lay my head on hers, nuzzling her a little affectionately. Youare so sweet she ran her fingernails along my torso, gently now. She looked up at me and both her hands caressed down my taped cheeks. Such a pretty face. She began to unpeel the edge of the tape from my skin, adding, Such a prettyeverything. And with one quick yank, she stripped the duct tape off my lips. My eyes bulged out hard as the pain grabbed hold of me. Without a word of apology, she was pulling the wet underwear out of my mouth. There you go, sweetie. She acted like she did something nice for me. Thank you, Paige. I leaned in and kissed her mouth, getting her kiss in return. Still making no move to untie my wrists behind me, she instead slipped the condom off me and walked away to get rid of it. I stood there, waiting for her to return, clenching my jaw a bit now that she wasnt in view. In a minute, she returned and had the meat scissors in her hand. Turn around, sweet cheeks. She grinned as I turned my back to her and she stroked my ass, giving them a couple of light slaps before she cut me loose. There you go. She said again, helping me get the tape off my wrists. This is one of the reasons I dont like much hair on my body. Thanks, Paige. I said again. I began to pull up my pants and she watched me.

I turned around towards her and she handed me an envelope. I didnt need to check it. Ive dealt with Paige for months now. She was rich and married and neglected and she always paid properly. You earn every penny, gorgeous. She complimented, You really did look so scared and humiliated. Youre great. I bet she doesnt even know my real name. She never says it. Thank you. I smiled, putting the envelope into my back pocket. Come take a shower, love. She took me by the hand and led me down the hallway towards the master bathroom. Yes, Paige. I smiled, curling my fingers around hers.

9 EPOV Thank god for gyms and barbells and sweat. I had finished lifting weights and had already done my 5 mile run, so I was nice and ripe and my gray shirt was dark with moisture under my arms and around my neck. Now I was slamming my fist into the punching bag, the other swiftly following, piercing deep into its long, bulky hard surface. Emmett held it in place for me as I took a breath and lunged into it again, fiercely. Alright, Edward, when are you gonna talk to me, bro? he looked at me and smirked, as if he knew something. Talk about what? I exhaled, pounding into the bag again, as if I were punching it in its stomach, one hand, then the other. Well, either this punching bag did something really shitty to you, and youre trying to kill it, or theres something else bothering you. He said, turning a little, holding the bag as I moved with it. Im just working out, Emmett. I stated, boxing against the bag with two more jabs. Okay. He dropped it, then asked, How are things going with that girl? Fine. I said curtly, two more harder punches. Uh huh he gave me a knowing stare. I ignored that and kept punching. Come on, man, its ME. Emmett was staring at my face now, Havent I been there for you, Edward? You can talk to me, you know. I AM your friend. I closed my eyes and felt guilty now, knowing he was right. I am building walls now all around me, even between me and people I thought I could trust. Emmett doesnt deserve to be locked out. He is a true friend.

Fuck. I sneered, stopping with my punching, leaning my back against the wall, looking at Emmett now as he let go of the bag and took one step towards me, folding his arms, waiting, Sorry, Emmett. I know youre my friend. I just dont open up very well. I know that. He chuckled, not surprised in the least by my confession, So whats bugging you? Is that girl no good in the sack or something? She have unsightly body hair, what? I grinned at him despite my bad mood. But why am I in a bad mood? Nothing different had happened to me today. I do this all the time. No, shes AMAZING in the sack. I widened my eyes to emphasize my point, And shes too beautifulbut(I took a huge breath)shewants to talk to me all the time. She asks lots of personal questions. Theres this paper shes writing or something, she finds me interesting and I agreed to let her study me or somethingI thought at first it would be alright. I have no intention of telling her my whole life story, but, I thought some things wouldnt hurt to tell her. Only now(I glanced at him)I feel weird. Weird, how? his brow creased in curiosity as he listened intently. My stomach feels in knots and my head hurts. I gave him the physical sufferings first, And today, during a job, I almost couldnt even ring the bell. I felt like I couldnt breathe for a couple seconds. I mean, I never have a problem doing role play, especially with the woman today. She always got me off, right away, but today, it took a lot longer. She didnt mind, she got a nice long fucking but it bothered me. I mean, thank God I had to play the submissive part today, but what happens when I have to play the dominant personality, you know? Shes getting in your head, thats why. Emmett said, knowingly, Shes dredging up all these thoughts in your mind that you kinda buried and its affecting you. You better be careful, Edward, if you turn soft, you wont be able to work and I dont even want to THINK of what Victoria would do to you then. Tell me about it. I almost shuddered, thinking of an angry Victoria, And I have Raven this Saturday. Ouch! Emmett chuckled, not envying me, Well, at least with her if you scream, beg and cry, youll just make more money. Not that you have a choice to do that when shes got hold of you anyway. I have to make something up to Bella about that, its on a weekend, she wont have any school. I thought aloud, And I cant tell her the truth, shed never let me go. LET you? Emmett picked up on that one. Shut up. I frowned as he laughed a little. What if Raven doesnt let you go again, like last time? Emmett asked. Victoria said she handled that. I heard myself reply, coldly, Raven swore not to do that again, Victoria told me. If she does, Victoria promised me wed never work for her again. And you believe her? Emmett looked at me like I was a little girl believing in Santa Claus. Yes. I forced myself to say.

That woman put you in the hospital, Ed! Emmett reminded. Shut up, EM! I nicknamed him as he had nicknamed me, I told you, its alright. Nothing bad is going to happen. Edward, all crap aside, Emmett almost whispered to me, Victoria is great, and I owe her a lot, and so do you. But dont trust her. She may be treating you real nice right now, but its only because you bring the money in. She doesnt care if you get hurt, as long as you can heal and get back out there again to work. You know what she was asking the doctor at the hospital? How long before he can work again? How long will it take him to earn again? Thats all. Raven was supposed to have you for one day and kept you for three! Only then, when I yelled at her, did Victoria pick up the phone and call her, asking when she was giving you back. Oh, and she told Raven to keep you as long as she likes, but she would have to pay lots more. That conversation happenedwhile you were dying of thirst in a 90 degree basement and starving, as I recall. Victoria handled it. I stated again, knowing what Emmett was saying was true but not wanting to hear it voiced so clearly, She taught Raven a lesson. Raven didnt work with us for 6 months after that stunt. Now she knows the rules. Itll be different now. You think in 6 months that woman lost all that sadistic shit in her head? Emmett asked, then answered his own question, No. Are you trying to help me or make my head hurt MORE? I asked, getting annoyed. Im just saying, if you want, you can tell Victoria no, that you dont want Raven as a client anymore. He said, Take the beating that follows and forget it. Its better than what Raven would do to you. You know that. And then Victoria fires me. I finished, sounding irate, wiping my face with my towel. She wont fire you. Emmett looked at me, Youre her favorite now. Emmett. I growled, not wanting to hear it now. No, its okay. He looked down at his sneakers, I know it and Im not mad at you, its not your fault. You do a good joba great job. You never complain, you never let anything bother you.until now. Even when you get attacked, you smile and hug the women afterwards. Youre like a machine. You even amaze me sometimes. A machine? I repeated, mumbling it more to myself. I hate the way that soundsand it doesnt feel too great, either, having your best friend tell you youre a machinea thinga piece of equipment. Its alright. Emmett continued, I had my turn as the favorite. I had a good run, 2 years. Its a nice ride, so enjoy it. Just remember to be gracious, like me, to your predecessor when its time for you to step down from the throne. He talked as if kidding, but I got his message. And in his way, he was being caring and a friendbut now I was just more confused. Hey, remember when I found you? Emmett smiled as if recalling a nice memory.

In a second, flashes of memories came to mind. My body, wracked with pain, my arms held tight behind my back as the huge, burly man pounded his fists deep into my stomach. Sharp stabs of pain, my own voice choking and trying to breathe in the cold dark chilled air of January. We want our money now. The man holding me said pleasantly, Today. I can get it I coughed, the taste of blood on my lips as I searched for something to say to make them give me more time. I heard a click and as much as I physically could, I made my face look up, seeing a switchblade in the mans hand. Wrong answer. The man smiled and said to the one holding me, Hold his face. I struggled and panted as the one behind me roughly snaked his arm around under my chin, cutting off my air and holding my face up at the same time. WAIT! I pleaded, the man with the knife was very close to me now, holding my chin firmly, I swear, Ill get it. Tomorrowjust give me until then. Let this be a reminder to you, never screw with usand never be late paying us back. Which eye do you want to keep? I couldnt moveor speak. I froze and tensed and my eyes clenched shut. This is where I met Emmett. We were in the alley next to the back of Fire and Emmett was outside, in back of the club, having a cigarette break. Back when he smoked. Now hes eating apple wedges instead. It seems to be working. Anyway, it was Emmett who smashed the man with the knife over the head with a metal garbage can and kicked the ass of the one who was holding me, too. Yes, I remember. I smiled. I know you dont always like to hear what I am saying, Edward. He put an arm around me, But you know Im just trying to help you, always. I protect all my friends. And Ill always protect you. Because I love ya, man. I know. I said honestly, Thanks, Emmett. Say you love me too. He laughed, giving me a shove. I told you, I dont do gay scenes. I reminded with a chuckle. We laughed and then I said quietly, Love you, too. Then we both looked around to make sure no other guy had overheard that. I looked at the clock on the wall and it said 2:18pm. Ive gotta go. I stood, Its almost 3. Oh, yea. Emmett stood up, moving towards the punching bag to keep working out on his own, Hows everything goingwith that? Slowbut its going. I said, not able to say much more. I dont even go into details with Emmett on this, and Ive known him for years. She alright? he knew to keep his questions vague and brief on this subject.

Shes an angel. I smiled to myself and went back towards the locker rooms. She just needs her wings back, I thought as I began to undress, taking my shirt off, and wings are very, very expensive these days. Id work for Victoria until I was 97 years old if thats how long it takes to make her right again. And besides the money part of it, I deserve whatever happens to me. I deserve Ravens wrath, even if it does go on for three days. I will never be able to suffer or pay enough for what Ive done and what I havent done. The only thing I truly suffered inside of me, during Ravens three days of fun, was missing my phone call with her. It is what I live for. Hearing that soft, sweet voice in my ear, hearing her laugh and listening to all the little details of her day. And, soon, she gets bored of talking to me and wants to gotoo soon. I always want to talk forever but she has more important things to do. I understand thatbut still, I always hang up feeling as if I am becoming less and less in her life, a little more transparent every day. I am a voice on a phone, not flesh and blood anymore. And one day, she wont remember me at all. And she wont even want to talk for one minute, let alone 30. Then I truly will bea machine.

BPOV I was rushing home, missing Edward so much my skin hurt, like it was crying because it hadnt been touched or kissed or caressed by him for so long. God, I have it bad. As I walked home, I kept hearing my own voice in my head, saying, Im not in love with you to Edward. I had made it sound so real that even now, recalling it, it sounded like I truly meant it. And then Edward looked relievedso I repeated it to him AGAIN this morning. What am I doing? I wanted to show him my love, declare my love for him from every rooftop, and damn the consequences, and maybe try to grasp that this is Edwards lifestyle and make my peace with it somehow, and try to have a real relationship with him. But in my heart I knew I was kidding myself. I may love him, after two days, or it may be the sexual release I am experiencing at his hands. Maybe the rush and thrill of the orgasms and sensations are making my mind believe that I love himwhen really its just my bodys reaction to the pleasure hes giving me. I hate thinking like a shrink. But I have to, its my soul, analyzing things, probing and studying how things are the way they are. And I love it more than anything, or so I thought, until a couple days ago. Now I find myself very uncomfortable with digging into Edwards head and his past. I dont like hurting him or seeing that sad look in his eyes when I start chipping away at his hard shell exterior. But I have to get used to this, if I want to truly help people, I must stir them up and probe into their painful scars, no matter how hard they may fight me or scream or cry. I knew I eventually have to make Edward angry. So angry that hell let some of that rage out. But Im not ready for that yet. I also know Ill have to make him

face his sorrows and that there will be tears. And I dont know if Im ready for that, either. How can I make him cry? Id rather lose my arms. So many people have made him hurt and I really didnt want to be one of them. And I feel like a hypocrite telling him to be honest with me and then I turn around and lie to his face. But I know if I tell Edward I love him, he will leave. I dont know how I know that, I just do. And I dont want him to leave. I love him. I can tell myself anything I like about my minds reaction to his physical attentions, but I feel it in my heart. I am totally in love with him. I dont know how it happened so fast, but it did. And I just have to deal with that and brace myself for the inevitable. He is going to leave. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but soon. I will have to lay down in bed and he wont be with me, curling his arms around me while I drift off. Ill get up and have to make my breakfast, if I even feel like doing that, and he wont be watching Sponge Bob and smiling at me when I sit down. Ill have to shower and think of his voice singing Music of the Night. Those are just three little things that I will have to get used to when he goes, and even those small thoughts are like red hot swords driving slowly through my heart. At the end of these two weeks, Ill have a thousand more things to miss when he goes. I know first love is supposed to be painful and bittersweet, but this situation is just too surreal. Not many girls fall in love with a male stripper that they bought for two weeks so they could also study his psyche. Maybe its because hes my first real patient, maybe thats why I care so much. My need to help him, to save him might be driving me towards some hero complex. And he is my Lois Lane, my damsel in distress that Ive somehow fallen for. Bella Swan, that is the dumbest thing youve ever conjured up. And even now, on the way home, I kept picturing Edward in different lifestyles. Wearing a shirt and tie, at a desk, answering a phone; maybe selling cars, opening a car door and smiling as a woman steps inside and sits down to give it a try; oooh, theres a lovely image nowEdward as a construction worker, wearing a hard yellow hat and no shirt, glistening and tan in the sun as it pounds down on his perfect chest.and he takes a break, pouring ice cold water down into his mouth and it runs a little down his throat and into the little creases of his chest GAH! I need a cold shower, thats the answer. I had picked up my surprise for Edward on the way home and had it hidden in my backpack, looking at my watch. I am very early, good! I cant wait to see his smile again and get a nice kiss. As I came up the stairs, I could hear his voice already, faintly. The walls here are way too thin. I could always hear Mrs. Nevitz across the hall playing her Julio Iglesias albums on Saturday nights. He was laughing and I smiled, moving slowly and quietly so I could keep on hearing it. I heard no other voices, though and I was relieved. I hoped Edward knew that I didnt want him working in my apartment. Oh yea? his voice asked very sweetly and I felt a little jealous of the person he was talking to, most likely on the phone.

He laughed again as I got the the top of the stairs and began to come down the hallway towards the door. Oh, okay. He said all of a sudden, Oh- wait a second! A small pause. I love you. He said, full of emotion and with a hint of sadness. I stopped, feeling my heart squeeze inside. I feel glad that Edward has someonethat Edward loves someone. That means he is not completely alone and there is a living, breathing someone that Edward has feelings for. That is wonderful and may help him overcome his pain. So why was my first reaction painand hurtand jealousy? Okay, bye. Edward said quickly now, and added, Talk to you--- He paused again and hit a button on his cell phone, it sounded like, a little beep. And he added, solemly, tomorrow. , finishing his sentence to himself. I winced, hearing him moving around inside. I couldnt just open the door now, hed know I heard some of that. And I was too early. Maybe I should leave and come back at 4, like I said. Where will I go? Oh, this is New York, Bella! There are 1,000 shops and ice cream places out there! Go get a soda, a Popsicle something!! I spun around and began tiptoeing down the hallway when the door opened. Oh fuck! Bella? his voice asked as he walked towards my back. I turned, smiling like an idiot, wondering what my brilliant explanation was going to be for walking in the wrong direction, away from my door. He was smiling at me and holding a bag of garbage, appearing to be on his way out to dump it. I hate it when he keeps doing domestic chores around here. But, maybe, for him, this helps him feel more at home. So I was letting him do whatever he wanted around the place. Hi. I astutely responded, my inner brain quickly typing on its computer, trying to help me come up with a feasible excuse. I waited impatiently for its results. Beautiful. He leaned in, kissing my lips very softly and for a good amount of time. God, I missed you. Dont ever leave my side again, Edward, I beg you. Ill rob banks to keep you if I have to. Ill chain you to my bathroom sink! No, that wasnt my brain talking, that was another deep, dark part of me. My brain shut the door on that little voice and kept typing away furiously, trying to work. Once the kiss ended, and I let go of Edwards poor hair, hoping I didnt yank any of it out, I knew this was it, my moment of truth. What were you doing, walking that way? Edward smirked a little, finding me a funny puzzle at the moment, Did you forget the mail or something?

GOOD! I yelled out loud, making Edward jump and laugh and then I covered my mouth, adding, Umm, yea, I passed the mailbox and totally forgot to get it. Thanks a lot, brain, for your help! Take a time-out now ten minutes. I was going to get it this morning, but I dont have the key and didnt want to intrude. He said as he walked with me back down the stairs, his free arm at the small of my back, stroking up and down intimately. God, even this small of a touch is driving me crazy with desire! And his smellmy lips still taste like him, too, after that kiss. Its likemint with a little chocolate hint in it. Maybe he had chocolate chip mint ice cream today. MMMM, Id love to see him eat ice cream What the hell is happening to me? I cant keep a coherent though anymore without Edward starring in it. Even thinking of school is no good, today I pictured Edward as my teacher in James place, slapping my naked ass with his pointer stick. I am buying myself a straightjacket for Christmas this year. I deserve it. Youre not intruding, Edward. I responded to his statement, meaning it, Believe me, the most exciting mail I get is my People magazine and maybe a free offer for the new Betty Crocker cookbook, along with my three free recipes for fudge brownies, lasagna, and red potato wedges. He laughed hard at my little rant and I chuckled along with him. Oh, does he think Im joking ? Poor, nave Edwardhe thinks Im not a total dork. Only you can do that to me. He kissed my cheek softly, putting his arm around my neck, Make me laugh after the day Ive had. I cant believe its only been a couple days He nuzzled his face into my neck and kissed my neck four tiny and hot times, taking a little nip as we reached the bottom of the stairs. There he released me too quickly and I followed him towards the door going out. He stopped and looked at me. Arent the mailboxesthere? he looked up and behind me with his eyes, pointing and I felt my cheeks flash redly. Oh, yea. I squeaked, clearing my throat, and added, Sorry, I forgot. And I spun in humiliation and moved myself to the wall of mailboxes in the lobby, my jaw set in embarrassment at myself. It was a wall of little gold squares and each had a number. Mine is 13, figures, right? With my good luck. I put my little silver key in and turned it open, taking out my junk mail and quickly looking through each piece. Here is my exciting mail: Geico you may be able to save over $500 on your auto insurance. I have no car thank you goodbye garbage. St. Thomas Church a pre-printed post card, saying, We miss you Where have you been?

They miss my donations is more like it. And I have given up church, I am sleeping with a male whore and loving it, Satan rules and I am going straight to Hell thanks for asking goodbye trash. Oooh, Lillian Vernon catalog! Keeping that! Yes, I am only 20 and have the soul of a 40 year old housewife, sue me. Jenny Craig You can look a lot better than you do now ! Join us ! Fuck you, bitch! Garbage ! What DINK came up with that idea to lure customers in? It mustve been a man. Asshole. Man, my mouth is getting really bad. Even in my head, I sound like the old Eddie Murphy, before he joined up with Disney. I miss that Eddie Murphy, so bad. Just once I wish the donkey from Shrek would look at up Shrek and go, Fuck you, Shrek! Thank God Edward cant read my mind. Hed run away, screaming. Do you think he knows I heard his phone call, a little? I dont think he knows, he kissed me and all, and he looks happy, but I know that he can place that happy face on in two seconds when he has to. That means he is hiding again, playing nice. I hate when he does that, even though its not his fault. Thank God its almost time to get into therapy. I let him off easy yesterday but today I wanted to make some real progress and get down to some things. A note from my dad. Charlie is such a nut, a loveable nut. I told him to call me if he wants to talk, I had loads of time to sit around and shoot the breeze, until a couple days ago, but Charlie always says he doesnt want to bother me if Im busy so at night, when hes at his desk, bored from the lack of crime going on in Forks during his night shift, he sits there and writes me letters. Its always bulky and full of pages. Charlie is like me, its easier to write things down instead of saying them. But, at least he is expressing himself in some form. I would read this later, when Edward isnt around. I dont know if he realizes or knows it, but I think it might make him nervous, knowing my Dad is a chief of police somewhere, even if it IS far away from here. I dont want him thinking Im setting him up for some undercover prostitute bust or something. Why do I sound like I just walked out of a bad episode of Miami Vice? Charlie, he probably thinks Im the life of the campus, going to parties and dating all the guys I can find. Or maybe he knows Im a huge nerd and sit around every night watching NCIS or George Lopez. I hope he doesnt know. Somehow, it makes me feel like he might be disappointed in me, if he knew what a loser I am. And now, me paying Edward all my inheritance money from his dead mother, for two weeks of I can only call it heavenalthough others might have a dirty and sleazy name for itwould only make him MORE disgusted and disappointed in me. He can never know of this. He can never meet Edward. And now I feel very sad. Another reason we could never be.

Well, that was all my mail. So now I just had my catalog and my letter from Charlie and locked my box back into place as Edward re-entered the lobby and came up behind me. I heard him coming but I did not expect what came next. His arm quickly grabbed around my neck and a little something sharp was lightly poking me in the back. Dont scream. Dont fucking move. His voice sneered deliciously and deeply into my right ear, Walk slowlyup the stairs. He spun me around and I began to walk, his arm still pressing a little, tilting my chin up a bit as we made our way up the stairs. There was no one else around, which is good. Someone might think Im being kidnapped and call the cops. But then again, this is New York. No one cared in this city. Even if they did call a cop, I could be raped and killed by the time theyd even put their donut down and move their overweight asses into their cars to come check it out. Even on CSI, they always get there AFTER the poor dead body has been laying there for two days! I didnt speak during our ascent upstairs, I was too stunned to come up with a cool line in this hot little game. I wanted to say that it was really therapy time, but I didnt want to. I wanted this. I wanted to see what he would do to me next. I was already very wet from his voice alone, and his kidnap so far. This was a long time fantasy of mine, one I would just play out in my mind. And now it was coming truewith him, a very skilled player who would do it right. I wonder what that little thing is in my back and as soon as I thought that, we were in front of my door and the thing was removed from my back and inserted into the lock of the door. Oh, his key. Okay, good, at least it wasnt a knife, that would be a little scary. But then I knew if I didnt want this, all I had to do was say lo mein. But I wasnt about to say that yet. I decided to start playing along to let him know I was into it and to make it more fun for him, too. I want him to enjoy me, for real, and not just perform for me without his heart being in it. So I tried to play now. Listen I began, I have a little money in my purse, you can have it, alright? Just please dont hurt me. I thought that was pretty good. Believable and I actually used my nervousness to make myself sound scared. He huffed, shoving the door open and scowling, You think I need your pocket change?! Get in and shut up! He gave me a pretty good shove and Im amazed I didnt fall, me being cursed with the miracle of clumsiness. I gave a real squeal that time and before I could do anything, his hand was in my hair, yanking it backwards and the door slammed shut. I gave a little cry again, closing my eyes as he controlled me, bringing me to the counter of the kitchen, forcing my chest down onto it, bent over with my arms curled under myself, panting, in a dizzying dream state, feeling a big fantasy of mine, not just in my thoughts but on my body, real arms touching me, hands roughly against my body.

Ill take this. He yanked the backpack off my arm and then stole my mail out of my hand, tossing it over the other side of the counter,And this. His hands curled around my waist and began undoing my pants, unzipping them as I exhaled harder, giving a whimper and letting my body struggle back as I always did in my little fantasy world. It was okay to say no here and I was glad. I could play my part and not make him think I was really against this. Only lo mein would stop him. No, pleaseNO! I began shrieking but his hand slapped over my mouth hard, not even allowing breath to pass through. Shut up, bitch! he sneered wickedly into my ear, his lips almost touching it, This is going to happen so just shut up and take it. Dont make me hurt your pretty face. His other hand stroked softly along my cheek, the one hand still holding my mouth with brute strength. I gave a couple more whimpers, so aroused at this point I felt a damn puddle forming in my underwear. Will you be quiet now? he asked me. I breathed harder, waiting a moment then making my head nod a couple times. If youre not he spoke softly now, making my skin shiver more, I will gag youand I will hurt you. Do you understand me? I whimpered again, nodding. Good. He seethed in my ear, Brains and beauty. I love you college girls. His hand left my mouth and I just panted wordlessly as his hands both yanked my jeans down off my ass, my panties yanking down too, as his hands clawed at my clothes like an impatient animal. I tried not to squeal or yelp as the jeans got all the way to my ankles then stopped, his voice growling in frustration with my inconvenient clothes. He went, instead, to my t-shirt, yanking it off my body, over my head and out of my arms, tossing it on the counter to my right. Fucking bra! he growled, undoing it quickly as my eyes closed, my breathing getting harder and heavier. He tore that off me and tossed it over the counter, too as my arms still laid under me, half covering my naked breasts. Turn around. He spun me roughly, my back against the counter now as he exhaled a deep breath, his rough hands kneading both my breasts as my head laid back off the counter edge a bit, arching my back up against my will. It sounded as if Edward had never seen my body before, or felt my breasts the way he was breathing as he groped me roughly with no tenderness now. He is very good. I wonder if he ever took acting lessons. Bitch he breathed, diving his mouth onto my right breast, biting and licking and sucking it savagely, as if he HAD to have it all, his hand squeezing it at the base the whole time.

I loved the way his mouth worked. So wickedly rough and brutal, but not enough so to hurt me for real. God, he is excellent!! I even couldnt help giving a little bit of light squealing and whimpering, hoping I was playing my part welleven though I wasnt really TRYING to actthis is AMAZING! My attacker ignored my noises and kept having his way with my left breast, his other hand moving raggedly over my torso and down around over my ass, then again, desperately clutching between my legs as I let out a tiny scream. His hand grabbed my throat and his lips ascended from my nipple and he gave a small little squeeze. What did I say about quiet, bitch? he quizzed me. I was really heaving for air now slightly and felt my face turning a bit hot. Im sorryIm sorry I panted, closing my eyes, Ill be quietIll be quietplease One more time and Im sticking something very unpleasant in that hole of a mouth. He warned, Like perhaps a couple of brillo padsor maybe a nice soapy sponge. I shut up and didnt say anything else now, not wanting that. He held my neck and loosened the pressure to let me breathe, but his mouth was all over my body nownot placing sweet, warm kisseslicking, biting, sucking.I half opened my eyes, getting hotter and hotter from this with every inch of me he assaulted and I realized my face was upside down off the counter edge, and I could see my window, a tree and telephone wiresfreedom and life only feet away while this was happening to me. He had worked his way now, down to my belly button and in seconds he was licking and softly biting my clit, my back arching more as I tried to struggle a little more, my useless arms and hands were just laying at my sides, passively. The little devil in me said I was making this too easy for him and we decided to put up a little fight. RRRRRR!!! I kicked my legs harder and peeked down a little, deciding to grab his hair with my both hands. I didnt pull but the idea was clear. No!! I heard myself squeal, Dont TOUCH me!! NO!! Stupid bitch. He sneered, and I felt the key against my clit, not hurting mebut cold and rough. Fight me! he scowled, daring me, Fight me and this is GONE! I closed my eyes and let my head fall backwards again. He is good. What a way to stop a fight in one second without working up a sweat. I knew it was only a key but for our game it was a knife. Get your fucking hands out of my hair. He demanded and I let go, knowing I was as good as dead. I actually was truly afraid and that excited me more. The key came off my clit and his one hand squeezed around my cheeks from under my chin, and in a second, I was sitting up in front of him, nose to nose

with him and his eyes looked so god damn angry and lethal I nearly screamed again. Do you WANT to BLEED? he asked, low and hissing like a snake, Do you WANT ME to fucking KILL you?! No! I panted, squealing, my eyes closed to protect myself the burn in his eyes, No, Im sorrysorry You certainly are. Oryou will be now. He gave my cheek a light slap and my eyes popped open on their own, looking at his. Oh, whats that? he squinted, Dont like me slapping you? Are you gonna take me on again?! SLAP. Not hard, just enough to make a noise. I never fantasized that but I found myself liking that, too. I am so twisted. Huh? he shook my face a little roughly and asked softly, You wanna fight again? SLAP. This is nothing. He informed, If we fight again, I use my fist next. So answer medo you want to fight? No. I gritted through my teeth as he squeezed my cheeks together harder, No. I dont believe you. He snorted, grabbing my long mane of hair at the roots, close to my scalp, Get up, you little whore. He began walking me out of the kitchen but then I tripped, forgetting my ankles were in my jeans around me, my sneakers still on, too. I fell face down on the beige carpet with a little cringe and groan and I heard his evil laugh behind me, standing there, looking down at my naked ass. I flushed hot in my face again as he ordered, Take those off and get up. Quickly, I sat up and pulled my sneakers off, then the jeans and panties, and I stood up, his hand in my hair again instantly. It seems I cant trust you to play nice. He observed out loud, yanking my hair up so I was leaning back against his body, on my tip toes, my ass resting against his hips. He picked up one of the cushioned bar stools beside us, sweeping it and me into the living room, where there was a large circle of free space. Perfect. He placed the stool down, and shoved my stomach down on top of it, bending me over, my feet just an inch off the floor. My arms hung down and I felt my hands hold onto the bottom bar of the stool to support myself. Dont move. He leaned in, his lips at my ear and I shuddered for real, not daring to move now. I dont think Edward would really punch me in the face, but I didnt want to find out. No, he wouldnt punch me. But its incredible how real this all feels, even though I know were playing. I was having a great time so far. He found the ties off my curtains at the window and when he took those off, the curtains closed on their own, hiding me from view in case a curious pigeon flew by.

I trembled and panted as he sat on the floor below my arms and tied my wrists together and against the bar of the stool, keeping my arms down and in front of me, trapped. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the sensation of being tied up for the first time. The curtain tie was green and it looked so like Edwards eye color as I gazed at it against my pale white arms. It felt secure, and tight, but not painfully so. I tried to move my wrists but the knots were expertly tied. I was going nowhere. I gave a couple whimpers as my fists curled and uncurled uselessly and Edward ignored that and stood up, moving around behind me. My right ankle felt Edwards hand coil around it and then I felt cloth moving around it in its place, wrapping around my ankle twice and then knots firmly closing a couple of times against the bone of it I tried to touch my toe like a ballerina to the floor, but it didnt reach. I squirmed my foot a little and discovered how trapped it was, like my wrists. Without another word, Edward tied my other ankle in the exact same way, against the other bar of the stool so my legs were very open and pointless. There. He sounded pleased and I felt his hand give my right ass cheek three good hard slaps, as if I were a horse he was praising, Thats the good girl. I gave a little whimper and stifled the yelp I wanted to make. My head hung over, my hair hiding my face as I just stared at my bound wrists, wondering what hed do next, my body thrilling at this helpless, tied up feeling. I would just fuck you now, he informed, But you fought back and I dont like that. You made noise and I dont like that, either. You grabbed my hair and I dont like that most of all. He wandered over toward the kitchen as he spoke and I tried to turn my head to peek at him. I couldnt see into the kitchen, all I could see were my discarded clothes on the floor. The anticipation was insane and my body felt warm everywhere as I lightly struggled my ankles and wrists, as I often do in my fantasy. I gave a little grunt as I realized I was tied quite tightly actually. He came walking back in and before I could see what he had he was behind me. Then he put something down on the floor and came back around in front of me, picking up one of my ankle socks off the floor, rolling it up into a little ball. Its time for your spanking but I fear your mouth will start again. He stood right in front of me but I couldnt look up at his face because I was unsupported and hanging limply, staring towards the floor. He grabbed my hair and said, Open your mouth, slut. Before I could open it much, he shoved it into my mouth, not deep but enough to fill it. I bit down on the cotton ball and let out a little mmmmmm as his hand stroked my face, a touch of gentle Edward, telling me silently that I was doing well. I also knew that I could easily spit this out of my mouth at any time and say lo mein if I wanted to and I knew that Edward had thought that out, not making my mouth really gagged where I couldnt shout my password if I wanted to.

Im gonna give you five because Im in a very generous mood today. He announced as he stood behind me, And you will count off starting with 5 and going backwards until you reach 1. Got that, bitch? I nodded and breathed harder through the cotton and I made small, helpless sounds that said I was afraid. Good. He said curtly and then WHACK!! Something hard and long and wooden cracked over my ass, both cheeks at once. UUUuuuhhhh!!! I panted and cried out, my head trying to move up, falling back down weakly as the little sting began to prickle, my eyes clenched then opened. I dont hear your count! he was tapping the wooden thing on my left ass cheek. FIVE! I screeched through my cotton ball in my teeth. It was muffled but I could understand myself slightly. How the hell did I forget that? My brain is becoming mush with a little sugar on top the longer I am with this man. So much for my brains and beauty comment earlier. He said as I really frowned at that remark and then another swift lash sounded against my warm, unprotected ass. RRRR!! I screamed through my sock and immediately cried, FOUR! I think hes not hitting me that hard on purpose. Ill bet he can really deliver a horrible, devastating blow if he had to. My ass just tingles a little and its not really very painful at all. Progress. He muttered, then I heard the air whip as he landed the third blow across my lower cheeks. FUCK now THAT hurt ! RRRRRRRRRR!!! I screamed out harder, trying not to spoil things by using my word. I only had two more spanks to goI could do this. Awwww he mocked sympathy, stroking his hand along my ass, right where it hurtmmmmmthank you Edward, thank youI love yousooooo muchyesright thererubooohhhhhhhh Godthank you! I was thinking all those things but my muffled voice was moaning hard, speaking to him of how good his hand felt and thanking him with no words. Poor little slutdid that one hurt? he cooed, and he leaned in and placed a warm, wet kiss over the area that last whack had been. I just closed my eyes and moaned, loving the way he touches methe way his lips feel And once again, I fail to hear your count. He said. SHIT! How do I keep forgetting that?! What is wrong with me?! I had learned to count in kindergarten, am I really that brain dead now since I bought this amazing dark god? THREE! I tried to call out.

Too late. He snapped wickedly, I let the first one go but now I have to stop playing and REALLY hit you. I made more noises of nonono.through the sock in my teeth but he paid no attention, until he said, Oh, yes, yes, yes. Dont forget your count again or Ill add ten more to it. CRACK! GOD DAMN IT! My ass feels like it just split under the wooden thing he was hitting me with. I bit down and held back a couple tears, screeching and growlingrefusing to say my wordoh FUCK! TWO! I screamed while I suffered vocally. I cant believe I almost forgot again. I hoped I had said it in time. You just made it that time. He informed, It was almost too late. SLAP! The last blow sounded and it stung a bit but was not as powerful as three and two. ONE! I called the final blow. Good girl. He praised and moved his both hands along my slightly sore ass now, vigorously massaging the hurt away as I hummed through my cotton ball with pleasure. I love the reward for getting through my first little spanking. Small kisses rained from his lips onto my bottom, wherever there was even a hint of any pain was all healed now and I smiled as much as I could with my sock sticking half out of my mouth. Nothing like a good little spanking to make a slut behave. He said with a soothing, velvety tone of voice. God, it makes me hot when he calls me slut and bitch and even whore. I want to do a study on that and see if other women have the same experience, or maybe its just me. But the things hes saying are just making me more and more randy with each sentence. God, hes good. For someone who doesnt go to church anymore, I do say God a lot. He came around in front of me and said, And now. His fingers reached down and tugged on the cotton poking out of my mouth and drew it out in one long motion, letting it hit the floor below my face. If you bite me or scrape me, bitch he warned into my ear again, That spanking will seem like an orgasm when Im through with you. Understand? Yes. I breathed, having not much fight left in me at the moment. Besides, why would I bite the magical wand that was enchantingly spraying my whole life with wondrous pixie dust? What a good line that was, I smiled mentally to myself, I wish I could somehow put that one in my report. Then I told myself to pay attention to every emotion,

every sensation I was feeling nowit may be helpful when I do write my paper, experiencing things from the inside this way. But this was not something to study and analyze. I had waited 20 years for this fantasy and I would be damned if I was going to ruin it for myself now. Shut up and enjoy it, I told myself. I felt his cock insert itself into my open mouth and he was moving it slowly in and out, his fist in my hair, holding my head up enough to hold still and suck and lick as much as I could while he did the moving part. I made little pitiful noises as he panted, slightly increasing his speed. My noises were desperate mmmm!!s and gagged pleas for mercy as he pumped himself faster, his voice grunting and growling as I just tightened my soft, relaxed lips around him and kept my teeth away, my saliva wet, hot, and sloppy as he kept going. Uuughhh he growled, You will swallow every drop of me, bitch. Or its your ass. With this, he shoved in hard right near the back of my throat and exploded his cum there, slightly choking me as he kept his penis there, demanding, Swallow, bitch. Half coughing, I felt tears watering my eyes and I swallowed as I was toldoncetwiceand he withdrew himself from my mouth as I coughed for a second, blinking my eyes to rid myself of the tears. He let my head drop and he walked around to the kitchen, raising his jeans and zipping them as he opened the refrigerator door, and then I heard a soda can opening, a click, crisp metal sound and then his gulping and swallowing. Wow, its even hot when Im left here alone, tied up like Im just a sexual object. This is wilder and hotter than my fantasies even. I play struggled a little more, trying to bend my legs a bit, moving my head from side to side, slowly, trying to move my stomach as it rested against the surface of the stool. What a lovely sight you are he said from inside the kitchen but my hair was blinding me from seeing him as it hung there over my face. He was walking back in here towards me now as he spoke again. Struggling like that.. he said, Knowing theres no way to escapeknowing Im not finished with you yet. You are one hot little bitch. I panted, not talking right now and I saw him move into the bedroom. He came back, I was guessing with a condom. All I could see were his legs and feet. I went to get a condom and look what I found in your drawer. He sounded amused, coming around behind me. I heard the buzzing sound of last night behind me and I heard Edward tear the foil of a condom wrapper and put it on. You little slut, he ran the vibrator end along my ass cheeks, and I moaned quietly as the sensations from it reminded my body of what hed done with that thing to me last night.

Listen to you moaning like a cheap whore. He scowled and felt with his fingers between my legs, And CHRIST youre sopping wet! I hung there, my head down as I stared at the bar my wrists were bound to, wanting him to fuck me so badso hard. Now. He sucked his finger and gave a soft MMMMM, then he put the little vibrator under me, holding it against my full, red clit and at the same time, he penetrated me in one smooth motion. Both of us moaned out at the same time in our own separate ways. I could feel his free hand on my ass, clawing it with hard fingers as the little oval egg went bezerk over my clit, speeding me to a frenzy as I already began screaming, unable to control it. Fine, go ahead and scream. He began pounding inside me, holding the bar of the stool to steady me so I wouldnt topple over, his other hand working the little vibrator around the same area, wanting me to go insane from the undiluted pleasure of it. No one will care. He said as I kept howling out in abandon, No one will save your ass from me! I heard him groaning and grunting in his masculine gasps as I kept bucking and thrashing and squealing out for mercy, not able to think of many words. There were a few pleases but it didnt take long before I lost all lady like behavior and began to shout, FUCK!!! NO!! NO!! FUCKKKKK!!!! It seemed like forever to me because I was coming all over the place in different ways that I lost everything, even track of time and I even forgot I was tied to a stool. I felt like I was floating in a web of lust and heat and orgasm and I never wanted to be freed. Edward was panting and breathing harder than last night, I thought for a moment as he came again inside me, waiting for a minute before carefully backing himself out. Shit I heard him breathe as he stumbled a little near the bathroom door. I heard the water run for a couple seconds and then he was coming back over to me. I couldnt see him but I felt a very hot washcloth press against my crotch. Uuuuhhhhh!! I let out a very happy, throaty moan as the cloth moved up and down my tender lips. I wasnt sure if it was alright to speak to him now as Edward, but I hoped he was alright. I never saw him stumble before and was hoping that he did because of how good it had felt for him. Its for damn sure when I get off this stool, Ill be stumbling, too. Good babyhe breathed, stroking my ass and leg tenderly now, Good little baby I guess that means I did well playing our first game together. If I could applaud him, and say Bravo! In return, I certainly would have. He is an incredible dream rapist. I wonder if Hallmark has a card conveying that sentiment.

He began to untie my ankles, stroking around each one for a few seconds, feeling my feet and muttering, Good, nice and warm. As if checking to make sure they werent cold from lack of blood flow. Then he came around in front of me, wearing his jeans, no shirt, and felt my curled up hands, checking them now. Good girl. He said approvingly, untying my wrists now, carefully. As they came undone, my arms hung there for a second and he rubbed up each of my wrists with his hands, kissing them and massaging them with care. He kissed my head with a deep, soft kiss, also and his voice floated above me like an angels. Come here. He said softly, Ive got you. Carefully raise up to me. He helped my top half up and my arms curled around his shoulders and in a second, I was in his arms, being carried bridal style to the bed. He laid me down in the middle and covered me up with the warm blanket and quilt, going around near my feet again, slipping his hands under the blanket, massaging my ankles and legs with those knowing, skilled hands of his. I laid there, gloriously oblivious to everything around me except his expert hands as he kissed and massaged every inch of me, not to make me come this time, just to relax my sore muscles and put me at ease. Are you alright, Bella? he asked with true concern, his eyes deep and asking. I am SO alright. I murmured, closing my eyes, in a wonderful haze, almost feeling drunk, my words almost slurred, God damn, how did you knowhow did you do that, just out of nowhere? Were you planning all that? No. he smiled down at me, rubbing my wrist in little hot circles, kissing it again, opening his mouth and wetly closing his lips over the skin there, I was going to save that game for later, but then I just saw you at the mailboxes and I remembered what you said about being grabbed from behind. And I justwent with it. There was no one around. I hope youre not mad at me. You never said your word, so God, Edward, no! I sat up, taking his face in my hands and kissing him hard, I absolutely loved it, please dontdo that. I know to use my word if I dont like what youre doing. And I have never been sothrilled and scared and elated and HAPPY in all my life. His brow creased as if he didnt believe me. But he still smiled that crooked smile I adore. Really? he asked. No, I just came like that because I felt sorry for you. I stole one of his funnier lines again as he laughed with me. Its like you were a whole other person I said after a minute, Like, I really believed all those things you saidI felt it in my BONES. I was really shaking, Edward, but it was so intense andwild. Even my dreams werent as good as you! He took a breath and smiled more, moving closer and letting my head lay in his lap as he leaned down and kissed me again.

Im so glad his voice was wickedly deep as I closed my eyes, wanting to just simmer in the memories, Ive been told I play that part particularly well, but I always feel a bit nervous when I begin. I couldnt tell. I admitted truthfully, You felt in complete control to meand so evil. I get goose bumps now, just remembering your voice! God! He smiled down at me like a little boy now, all traces of my dark intruder were gone and he kept massaging me, taking excellent care of my body after play was over. I noted that. A very caring soul, very wishful to take care of someone else, to always make the other person happy and comfortable. That is the real Edward and I just knew it right away. Now he was being real, now was not fake or role play or fantasy. I could see it in his eyes. Edward let me lay in bed recovering as he took care of dinner for us. I just closed my eyes and remembered my back over the counter as he licked and bit my nipple, the feeling of my jeans being ripped down off my ass in the middle of the kitchen, and the exhilaration of my struggles as Edward tied me to the stool and had his way with me. Before I knew it, he was kneeling at my bedside, kissing my closed eyes and asking if I wanted to eat there or in the living room again. I chose the bed and we made another nice little picnic here together, eating steaks and green beans. I was laughing, in my care bear robe as we almost finished eating and Edward was saying, I thought for sure when I swatted you across the ass, I was gonna hear LO MEIN! LO MEIN!! I almost spit my soda out again, a full mouthful gurgling there as I tried not to laugh along with him. I swallowed and giggled, too, loving the sound of his laugh and his thoughts on our fun together earlier. It was getting dark outside and Edward asked me, Are we still having therapy today? I almost dropped my soda can and I looked at him. His eyes were down, on his plate, and he slowly brought them up, under his long lashes, as if afraid of my answer. I mean, I kindahad my game playing during your time. He said, I feel badly about that. Do you want to? I asked, stunned. Yes, Bella. He said and I shot him a look, but then he exhaled a breath and seriously, said, No, really. I would like totalk toDr. Bella. If thats alright. A little smile played there on his lips and I took my last bite of food. Alright, Edward, I leaned in and kissed his nose, Lets go to my office. Okay. He followed me, taking his can of soda with him, I guess, to have something in hands this time while he talked. I noticed that made him more comfortable. I adjusted my robe, not feeling very professional at the moment, but I reached for my notebook out of my bag and checked the tape. There was lots of tape left, as we hadnt gotten into long talks yet. Now that it was only about 7-ish, maybe we could have a nice long talk now. I hoped so, even though the stool in the middle of the room was still there, making my knees quiver.

I sat in my chair, my back to it, so I would be okay. I hit the record button and said, Edward- session 3. Hi Edward. I smiled at him, like a schoolgirl when I wanted to be more like Dr. Melfi on the Sopranos. Hi Dr. Bella. He smirked back, snickering for a second as he took a sip of soda. Okay, Edward, how was your day today? I began, finding it a good place to start. Ummmnot great, actually. He shared, Until I got home, that is. I blushed and tried to focus. Something was wrong and I had to stop being stupid now and concentrate on him, as much as he does on me when he is in charge. What happened? I asked, Before you got home? Well he exhaled, playing with the tab on his soda can, I had to work today. Andever since I woke up this morning, I didnt feel the way I usually feelwhen I have to go to work. He looked up at me, almost apologizing with his eyes as I stared back into his eyes, silently telling him to keep going and that he was really trying and I could see that. Go on, Edward, its okay. I soothed with my voice, Anything you say is alright. There is no wrong for usremember? He looked like he was struggling with something and said, YeaI know Again, silence. He was really troubled over something. I decided to ask a couple helping questions. You worked at Fire today? I asked. He shook his head, glancing up at me, then back down again, his soda can holding all his interest. Another party? I probed, At someones house? He swallowed and looked away and looked at meshaking his head again. I felt like I was talking to a little boy now and even his eyes had that little child shame in them. I dont think this is some act, either. I had to proceed very, very carefully here. Lots of times, Edward is very childlike and playful and I knew that was him being the child he never could be in the past. Something big was going on with him and I had to be there for him now. Edward acting so solemn and boy like could mean that he is afraid of being rejected again, afraid of a parent like wrath, afraid of being alone again and left behind, like he was back then. I searched for the kind of things he could be doing during the dayand then it hit me like a ton of bricks.

His eyes looked afraid as mine glazed over with epiphany. I could see him bracing himself for my reactions. And again, he looked down into the hole of his soda can. Edward I made my voice very calm, Did you do something todaywith a woman, other than me? A client? His eyes looked deeply full of sorrow now, deep remorse and bitterness as he set his jaw and closed his eyes, giving a nod to me. Okay, I will admit to being angry. I admit I am hurt and I feel used and want to cry and scream. But I know Edward is feeling all those things, too. And he has been through worse than I have today. Did the bitch hurt him today?! Right away, after my own pain, I noticed I was protecting Edward almost immediately afterwards. I shouldnt demand details unless he wants to give them. I must be there for him and show him that even if he sleeps with 200 more women, that I want to help him deal with it and that nothing he says can make me desert him now. Its not like we are boyfriend and girlfriend and I caught him doing Rosalie or something. I know this is his work and I knew it going in. This wasnt about my paper or my grade nowI love him. I always will. He is drowning and reaching out for me. Ill be there, always, to help him find air. Its alright, Edward. I kept my voice as calm as before and he looked at me, his brow furrowed and confused. It is? he asked simply. Yes. I breathed, feeling too far away from him now. I wanted to hold his hand and put my arms around him, but thats why a psychiatrists chair is so far from the patients.so this doesnt happen. But I cant help thatI am close to him. I want to be. Sowhy did you feeldifferent about working today? I asked delicately. His eyes looked up at mine. You know why. He looked away again. Because of ME? I voiced it, getting it out there. He nodded, not meeting my eyes. Part of me was dancing like a little girl inside but I stopped that right away. This isnt funny, Edward is suffering. Alright, so I did all the talking now, You feltwhat, exactly? Can you tell me? He exhaled again, frustrated, I dont KNOW! I feel like I am cheating or something. I feel like Im betraying you. Arent you angry at me? I thought for a minute and said, No. I am not angry at you. His eyes widened and looked at me, in disbelief, WHY?

Edward I began, Remember that girl you said you had the date with? The one who threw the drink in your face? Yea. He said, making the tab on his can move back and forth. What did you say to her when she asked you what you do for a living? I asked gently. I dont remember. He started but I cut off right away, saying, Yes you docome on, Edward. He sighed and muttered his answer, I saidI fuck old women. Is that all? I raised a brow, wondering if he left something out. No. he couldnt look at me, Then I saidtonights costing you $500. And at the same time, we both said, Thats when she threw the drink in your face. I almost laughed but held it in. I thought you liked her. How old was she? I asked. 25. He said. And you mustve been24 ? I asked, getting him to nod. So 25 is old now? I grinned, And was she really pretty? Yes, very. He answered, staring at the tab again. And you did like her. Yes, until she threw the drink in my face. He pointed out. But you dont see it, that you liked her, so you purposely insulted her and used your job to shove her away? I asked cautiously, Let me ask you a question. Why didnt you tell her you were a dancer? Or in the entertainment business? At least that wouldve been gentler and easing into things a bit instead of your answer, I fuck old women. Thats not all you do, Edward. What is the point?! he looked at me and raised his voice a bit, I couldve said those things, and then shed date me again and againand I would get attachedand then shed find out about what I really do and she would dump me. So I ask youwhat is the point? Are you trying to push me away now, Edward? I asked quietly and he didnt answer. He sulked a little, staring at his soda can some more. Hmm? I asked, waiting, You like me a little and youre afraid to get attached to me. You didnt have to tell me about today Im glad you DIDbut you told me, I think, because you thought I would get so angry at you that Id throw you outtell you to go to Hellnever come backam I getting warmer here? I didnt want to say it but part of me even hurt thinking that this last role play we did together was to further his cause of making me hate him. To tell me, right after wed made love that he had been with another woman earlier the same dayhold it together, Bella, cry later, not now. Imjust he began and then stopped.

No, Edward, keep talkingIm not doing all the talking here, I want you to say whats on your mind. Come on. I coached softly. I feelwhen Im with you he said, Like Im notworking. Its playing. Its niceand fun and youre so(he closed his eyes then opened them again)sweet - and innocent. Your eyes look at me and Im not at work. Im with a beautiful friendand I just felt sick today, not telling you where I was going and what I was going to do. I felt like I wasmessing up what happened between uslast night. And I didnt want to ruin that. Edward I mean, I know Im a hired toy. He began as I frowned and he cut me off, And I know you hate hearing that but its true. I am for your pleasure only, Im not supposed to hurt your feelings and I am not supposed to like you as much as I do. And I cant stop working at these jobs because I need them, Bella. I cant lose my job. Alright, alright. I could see him getting tense and very upset and this one time, I wanted to calm him down, No one is asking you to lose your job, Edward, okay? Take a breath. Good. Relax for a minute. Neither of us will talk, okay? Just close your eyes and breathe. This seemed to calm him and I was glad. Good. I finally said, breaking the silence, Thisis a very confusing situation we have put ourselves into. I will not deny that. I really like you, too, and maybe I treat you differently than your other clients. They can hurt you, shove you around, treat you the rough way they doand then I meet you and Im not like them. Im quiet and I try to be gentle. You ARE gentle. He corrected me. Thanks. I tried not to smile too big, continuing on, And Im very gentle with youand maybe that reminds you of your pastwhen someone like mecaressed you and slept with you, kissed you softly and played with you, ate dinner with you and loved you. And now, you are feeling all those things again and you are rememberinghow wonderful that was. I think thats really what you are missing and were missing today, when it was time to leave that and go to work. Its not so much about meits what I make you feel again, after so long. No. he looked like he was with me until I said it wasnt about ME. I truly do like you, Bella. He corrected, Its nothing to do with my past. Dont put yourself down, Bella. You are a great girl! I feel relief but I know I am on to something here, even though my heart doesnt want to swallow it. Thanks Edward. I smiled, my leg shivering a little. I put my hand on it, steadying it under my notebook. But I think its really your girlfriend you were afraid of betraying when you left this morningnot so much me. Weve only known each other for almost 3 days. Anything I do or say wouldnt make you feel sick inside like that. Can I ask you some thingsabout her? Who? he became stone faced, looking at me.

The girl I cleared my throat, Maybeyou can tell me her name today? Eyes down, body tense. Hes not going to tell me today. Alright, forget that. I dropped it, How abouttelling me how you met. He only relaxed a tiny bit now and said, In school. College. Tell me about when you fell in love. I said, almost like a suggestion. Do I have to? he asked, clearly struggling internally again. Come on, Edward, be brave. I gave a baby push verbally, I did the stool thing. He smiled and then tensedand exhaled and said, I was studying medicine. She studied art and photography. We were worlds apart. We probably wouldnt have met at all, but I was accidentally put into one of her art classes, the real kid scheduled in the class was Edward Callen. I guess they just typed it wrong, but I was sitting in this painting class and wouldve just walked outbut thenI saw her. And Icouldnt move. I just couldnt I smiled at him, loving him so much as he opened up to me some more. Amazing myself, I wasnt mad about his job todayor upset. What did I think, after knowing me for two days, hed quit his life and sweep me into his arms and wed live happily ever after or something? I needed to accept Edward for who he isgood, bad, and ugly. All of him. Thats what a therapist doesthats what a FRIEND doesthats what someone who loves youdoes. I blinked the tears out of my eyes and was glad it was getting darker in here now, he avoided my eyes so I was safe that he wouldnt see how much he touched me, talking to me like this. I was trying to paint at my easel, surrounded by these Picassos around me, not having a clue how to even mix colors, let alone PAINT anything on my canvas. The teacher even asked me if I was doing an abstract. I said no and she said, just paint what you see, dear. And it was a bowl of fruit! I couldnt help it, I had to giggle at that. I could picture him doing that, all for a girls attentions. He laughed, looking at me. It was so fucking sad. He bit his bottom lip, really at ease now. Anyway, after class she was walking past me and I said hello and she said hello back and looked at my painting with this look ofhorror on her faceand says, are your eyes alright? And we just both started to laugh and she offered me some help after school with my art, or she said she could recommend a great eye doctor. And that was it. I never left her side after that. His face was so alive and full of light until he added, Until I left college, that is. I hated to do it but I had to ask about his pain againand its source. Soall through college, you stayed close by her, and after college was over, after she graduatedwhat happened then? He looked around, struggling inside againhesitating.

Bella he looked at me, with wet eyes. Take your timeIm not leaving. I assured, giving him a warm smile. Finally, after a long of deep breaths and attempts, he said, Wegot married. He bent his head, clutching at his hair and closing his eyes. Thats good. I sounded positive, Was it a nice wedding? We got married at the fucking police station, a Justice of the Peace. He sneered, sounding very angry about that, I couldnt even give her a beautiful wedding day! But Im sure that didnt matter. I said softly, seeing only his hair now and his fists clutching at it, She loved you and Im sure it didnt matter to her how or where you were married. Dont you think so, Edward? Youre a girl. He didnt look up but his voice was very tense, Dont YOU want a nice wedding, a beautiful dress, flowers, family all around, music?! The truth, Bella! I couldnt lie to him now. Yes, I do. I admitted. He let a little breath out, and it sounded almost like he was quietly crying. But if it meant marrying some rich man I didnt love I informed, It wouldnt mean a thing. All that crap is just icing on the cake. The main thing is, having the man you loveand him wanting to spend the rest of his life with you. That would mean more to me than a wedding in a palace! And after all you gave up for her, all you lost and went through for her while she went through school I said, I am SURE she knew how lucky she was, Edward. To have true love. That is why she married you. And Im sure, too, that she was very happy that day. I would be. A long pause sat between us for a long time. Finally, Edward said, Thank you, Bella. I never thought of itthat way. I smiled, answering, Sometimes were too close to things to see the whole picture. You just have to stand back once in awhile, like looking at a painting. He sniffed, his head still down and I pretended to look in my notebook while Edward put his soda can down on the table and quickly wiped his eyes, letting another deep breath out. I hate seeing him cry. I want to hold him so badly. I want to kiss his tears and tell him that I love him and that hes not alone. But he cant be all alone. That phone call. He had said I love you to someone. I cant admit that I heard that, hell kill me. So, lets move on a little I took a cleansing breath and pushed on, feeling like were making real headway here, After you got married, did you get a little place together? At least this means you werent on the streets anymore, right?

No, no more streets. He grinned at me, the skin under his eyes still a little shiny, We got a loft apartment one huge room and a bathroom, even smaller than yours. I grinned and he looked at me quickly. I dont mean that yours is too small, I meant that he was always so fast to apologize. It is small. I stated, Im not offended by the truth. Go on. He made a mad face at himself for a second then said, We were pretty happy there for a while. No honeymoon, though. No furniture. We had to save for that and the few things we did get were hand me downs from her parents. But a lot of couples start out that way. We had a bed, on the floor, but it was soft. I see problems already before he even says the words. It may be cute at first to not have anything, but money problems can kill a marriage, especially a new one. This is so sad, Edward wanted to be a doctor and now he cant afford to buy furniture for his first place with his wife. That had to be eating him alive. So her parents were good to you? I injected. Yes, very. He said right away, They were always kind to me and her father even offered me a job at his factory. They make hangers, the plastic ones. Anddid you take that job? No, Tan--- he stopped and closed his eyes, She(he looked at me sadly again, apologizing)didnt want to leave New York. Her parents live in---very far away from here. She wanted to be an artist and a photographer and she said to do that, she had to be in New York. So I politely said no to her father and we tried to make things work here. They even asked us to live with them in their house for awhile, but she didnt want to do that, either. Her parents arent rich people, theyre very.lower middle class. They saved all her life to send her to college and then they had very little else in their savings account. But they are nice people, caring, down to earth. Andhow did that go? I asked, not dwelling too much on the slip he almost made in telling me her name or where her parents lived. Not very well. He said, rubbing his hand along his arm, I got a job as acashier. And she tried to find a job taking pictures, like, at weddings. But she had to start off as a photographers assistant and that paid very little. I know as a man, its my job to provide the bulk of the money for the house but I couldnt get anything even remotely well paying. Every day I would look for something else, something better. Every day there was nothing. I used to see those fucking ads for female escorts and all the money they would offer and Id laugh and say to herdo you believe people do that shit for a living? And wed laugh at those people. Again, his head fell into his hands and his breathing grew choppy and rough. She would probably laugh at me nowseeing what I am. He said, almost to himself. I waited a minute and then asked, Did you start fightingthe two of you?

I was going to ask if they got divorced, but that was skipping things and I didnt want to pry too soon here. We fought all the time. He said, his voice thick with emotion, Always about money. Stupid shit. She bought a box of candy once and I shouted at her and threw it out the window. I was so fucking rotten to her He cried a little more nowand I had to look away and wipe my own eyes, hoping he didnt see me. I hated seeing him so hurt. But it had to come out. I hate to ask this next one. Did it evergetviolent? I dared and he looked at me, the tears really falling down his cheeks as I looked at him. No, Bella. He squinted as if I should know better, I would never really strike a woman. Only lightly, in play, now.butthenno, I would never hurt her that way, I mean. Joseph and Katherine always taught meyoure gonna laugh at this onerespect for women. Im glad they cant see me now, either. No one is laughing, Edward. I said plainly as he looked at me, softer now, and let his head drop into his hands again. So, did you ever try to seek help? I asked, Like marriage counseling or I couldnt afford that. He snapped, as if this subject had come up before, You know how much those quacks charge?! He looked at me as I chuckled and winced, Im sorry, Bella. I dont mean you. Maybe, if we had talked to someone like you, we wouldve been happier. But I couldve never afforded YOU. Everything good is so fucking expensive. Tell me about it, I wanted to say, $20,000. But then I hated myself for thinking it. Suddenly, I didnt give a damn that I paid him to be here. He is here and he needs me and I love him. The rest meant shit to me at this point. Did shewant to go to marriage counseling? I asked. Yes. He said, leaning back on the sofa, licking his lips as he looked away, thinking, But I promised her I would try to be a better husband. I swore. And did youtry? I asked. Yes. He glanced at me, But it still wasnt good between us. We didnt fight or yell too much anymorebut we didnt talk much, either. We became strangers. We hardly evermade love. And when we did, it was stale and flat. But neither of us said anything about it. Andwhat happened then? I asked. Nothing. His eyes became guarded now and cold in one second. Nothing? I repeated. Can we talk about something else now? he asked. But Edward, I think

Please, Bella? his eyes were sparkling with tears and I couldnt push him to keep going when he said please like that to me. I am way too soft. Alright. I went to my questions in my notebook, But I dont think youll like my other questions, either. Try me. He challenged me. Okay. I chose a very harsh one because I wanted to keep talking about his marriage and its demise, knowing that was the beginning of the end for Edward. Tell me about the first time you sold yourself. I said coldly, as if reading it. God, Edward, I am sorry. Dont answer that. Fine. Edward frowned and nearly sneered at me, not that I blamed him. I didnt mean to say it that way, Edward. I tried weakly to correct my harsh words but he shot me a look. Do you want to hear this or not? his face was stone. I want to hear it. I made myself say and held my tears back hard. But did I really want to hear this? Well, after I washired by Victoria. His voice was hard now, I learned the art of dancing, playing my roles in the club. Emmett and Jasper were like my teachers. I learned very fast and discovered I was good at being Edward, exotic dancer. And thats all I did for awhile. One night, Victoria calls me to her office and tells me she has a job for me. A job that will pay me an extra $5,000 dollars. I was told I was to dance privately for a very special client. She said it was easy money and to go with her back to her house and do what I was told. I knew what it was she was asking me to do and I told her so. She said that she owned me and that I owed her my life and I knew she was right. So I went with the woman and made love to her while her husband watched from his chair in the corner, jacking himself off the whole time. Then he was coming over to us and I stopped, thinking he was going to punch me or something. But no, he didnt want to beat me up, he bent me over his wife and tried to fuck me in the ass while I was still inside her. It was only the wife who saved me from that. I ran out of there and walked 5 miles back to the club and told Victoria I was never doing anything with men and if thats what she wanted me to do, Id rather die right now. She claimed not to know about the husband but from then on, shes never tried that again. I am for women only and since that day, its only been women Iveworked for. Pretty story, isnt it? I didnt say anything and Edward said, I told you my life was ugly. Why do you want me here, Bella? Someone like me doesnt belong here with someone like you. Im so filthy I can never be scrubbed clean again. I told you, Edward, youre not going to push me away. I stated again, firm in this, Stop trying. Youre here for two weeks. I dont want you to go. I want to be your friendif youll let me. Please let me, Edward. I love---(I stopped myself and he looked at me, sharply)having you here with me.

He didnt answer and I remembered my plans with Edward for tonight, before I was so rudely attacked. Hey! I stood up and hit the stop button of my recorder, I have a surprise for you, Edward. I hope you like it. Its what I had planned for us tonight. His eyes followed me, silently and sadly and I thought for a second he thought I was going to ask for something sexual and beautifully, they didnt look interested in anything like that right now. I was so glad. I went to my backpack and took out a little rectangular box, wrapped in shiny blue foil wrap, a little white bow on it. His face fell, then his brow creased in the center, unsure of what I was up to. I sat next to him on the couch and dropped the box in his lap, HappyEdward Day. I just made that up on the spot. Happy Edward Day? he asked, not buying it, looking down at it. Yep. I lied, Today is Edward Day and all the Edwards of the world are being celebrated. So open it. Bella, he looked at me with fragile eyes, the tears still wet on his face, You shouldnt be buying me gifts Just open it, you pain in the ass! I yelled, laughing and smiling at him. He grinned at me, Pain in the ass, huh? Yes, literally. I looked at the stool and shoved him a little with my arm, Open. Silly little girl he muttered, taking the top lid off, and I smiled at his face as he moved the tissue wrap out of the way, seeing a nightshirt, size large, black with thin little red lines going across and down it. He smiled and held it up, it was huge and way too big for him but he treated it like it was priceless. Oooh, a shirtfor bed, right? Its SO soft! he acted so grateful for it but he didnt get it. And he wouldnt until I told him what it was, really. I took it and threw the box away, saying, Come here, sweet heart. I said that with true deep feeling, not in a joking way or teasingly. I gathered the shirt up along the big collar and placed it over his head, saying, I know I made rule number one, about you never wearing a shirt in here I let his hands slide through the sleeves as he looked down at it, then at me while I went on. But Im changing my rule. I informed, both his hands in the sleeves now. Perfect. It covered every inch of his chest, and then some, even hiding his nice pelvis. I want you to wear this shirt because you mean more to me than a perfect set of pecks, a washboard stomach and big muscular shoulders. I want you to be warm and all covered up and I want to hold you all night tonight. Because you deserve

that, Edward. I think you need it and crave ityouve been neglected, tooand have for a long, long time. And becauseI. I love yousay itI love youthree little wordsno big deal. But it is. I truly care about you, Edward, very, very much. I chickened out. But his eyes were so tender and sad and lonely. Is that alright? I used his favorite line on him again, my arms around him as I leaned my forehead to his, closing my eyes, hoping I wasnt overstepping the boundaries now, praying hed let me and not get scared again. After a long pause, and some deep breaths, Edward said, Yes, Bella. I looked at him and asked, Is this really what YOU want? Or are you just trying to appease me again? No. he said without hesitation, a little sadness still lingering in his voice, I want you to hold me, Bella. I thinkthat might even bebetter than sexa little. I smiled, so happy as he smiled up at me and I planted a big kiss on his lips, all salty from his tears. Poor little sweetie. I took his hand that was covered by the too long sleeve and said, Come with me, angel. He made a face at that word and followed me, Dont say that, I feel like a girl! You aremy girl. I informed with a giggle as he tried to tickle me for that comment. No, no. I squirmed away from him, turning off the lights and fluffing up the pillows so that I was propped up correctly for this. I laid down, keeping my robe on as he looked at me for guidance. Come here. I said first, taking his face in my hands and kissing his eyes, and every tear underneath them. I hate making you cry, you know. I whispered, But its good, its how you begin to heal, Edward. Im glad you criedbutit hurts me, too. I kept kissing the damp salty places on his face as he just sat there, silent, not moving, his eyes closed. Im not supposed to feel that, being a psychiatrist. I informed between my kisses, ButI care for you so much that Im too easy on you. Thatll just be our little secret, okay? And I kissed his lips with my open mouth, lightly licking and closing my lips over his. I ended the kiss early because I didnt want him aroused or tempting me towards sweet, magnificent sex with him again tonight. I wanted this night to be pure and innocent and lovingonly for him. Ill never tell. He whispered back, Even if they torture me. He snickered at his own joke and I laid back in bed with him, holding him close and letting him lay his cheek on my chest, my lips placing little baby kisses into his warm hair. I smiled as the little wild spikes of it tickled my neck and cheek

and I heard Edward let out a breatha happy, content little breath as we closed our eyes and let ourselves fall asleep this wayas one. I heard a couple little sniffles from him but I ignored that, not wanting to embarrass him. The male ego is extremely fragile. I just kept stroking him and squeezing him a little tighter to me. Bella? he whispered. Yes, Edward? Tanya. He breathed, Her name wasTanya. 10 BPOV I opened my eyes and could still feel his face on my body. Slowly rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I tried not to move too much so I wouldnt awaken him. Last night had been wonderful and I think a huge breakthrough for both of us, but I noticed over the course of the night how hard it was for Edward to have me hold him. I had suspected that he was silently crying at a few points throughout the night but he never made any big sounds or sobs. But I felt wetness against my robe here and there, and then there was the sniffling. Or maybe Edward is getting a cold. Yea, right, in May. Once or twice, he even began to move off of me and go to his own side of the bed, but I didnt release him. I hated to admit it but the holding all night was not only for his benefit, but mine, too. I have never had anyone to hold like this, to caress and pet and love like this before. And I know, before I even realize ithell be packing his things and leaving, and I will never hear his voice or see those pained, soft eyes again. I could always go to Fire and find him there if I miss him enough. Ugh. Pathetic. Edward will think Im some psycho stalker or something. And the thought of him working while Im sitting there, pining away over himYUK. No, I wont be doing that. It would make us both uncomfortable and just remind me more that Edward did a job with me, and thats all it meant to him, and now its over. And unless I had another $20,000 squirreled away somewhere, he would really want nothing to do with me. Worse, Id have to watch him be fondled and licked by those women and Id probably get arrested for tearing their hair out. But he did say he thought of me as a friend. Grow up, Bella, he probably says that to EVERY woman. How do you know hes not playing you right now? No, I argued with myself, thats crazy. I have nothing else he wants. What would he want with me, besides my money? Oh God. A paranoid thought crept into my mind. Maybe this has something to do with my Dad. He is a chief of police. Maybe Edward has some kind of score to settle with himNo. I found Edward, not the other way around. Stupid me. Why do I keep doubting him? Why cant I trust him? Then I heard Edwards voice from last night, saying, You know why.

I let the stupid thoughts of revenge against my father go and started to stroke Edwards arm again, the one that was laying across my stomach while his sleeping angel face rested snugly on my chest. My lips gently touched down on his head, letting my nose get tickled by the wavy spikes of bronze hair that almost sparkled in the upcoming sunlight. You are terribly and utterly beautifulI thought to him. I bent my head around a little and got a little peek at his face in the light now and I smiled, stifling a little giggle. His lips were again pouting out a little and they looked so soft and thick I wanted to kiss them off his face, which was, sadly streaked slightly with once wet lines. My heart hurts so much for him, and though I was embarrassed to admit it, Edwards tears had really frightened me last night. I never saw a man cry before and it shook me. But again, this is something I have to get used to and deal with if Im going to be a good doctor someday. I feel like I have to shut my feelings off in order to do this job right. But arent feelings and emotions what this job is all about? Why must I be a hard ass to my patient to help him properly? Why cant I hold them and take their hand and shed tears with them? Once I thought of doing that for hundreds of patients, day in and day out, I knew the answer: it would kill ME. I peeked at my alarm clock and saw the red digital numbers say 6:47am. I have time to lay here for a little more time with my sweet heart. I brought my arms in a bit tighter around him in his extra big shirt and closed my eyes, imagining I was Mrs. Cullen, and this was a Sunday and we had all day to lay around together, making love and drinking coffee, reading the Sunday paper in bed. Its such a clich that usually Id roll my eyes at. But with him in the picture, it looked so lovelyand impossible. I sighed and noticed that Edward doesnt snore. He is so silent and still. This is day 4. Thursday. Ten more days to go. Thats a good amount of timeand yet it is no time at all. I pictured him taking his bag in his hand, slinging it over his shoulder and putting on his sunglasses. Kissing me goodbye one last time and saying something terrible like, Thank you Bella, for having me. I had a lot of fun. And then him walking out with a smile on his face while my world was crumbling to the ground around me. Could I keep a stupid smile on my face during that? NO! Im not that good an actress. My mind flashed with the image of me laying on the floor, clutching Edwards leg as he tried to yank himself free and leave while I blubbered and begged him to stay. Ugh. That looks more like me, alright. I began to think over what was said last night, knowing Id have to update my notes and listen to the tapes in school again to see if I missed anything so far. How am I kidding? Im missing everything. I had hit a wall last night when I had asked what happened between him and Tanya after they were married and the money trouble began to tear them apart. Nothing, he said. Nothing. Unless she just vanished into thin air, there was more I needed to get. More digging I needed to do. She must have left him, orGod, I hope she didnt die.

That would explain the tears and the sadness in him. If he never cried and never dealt with the pain, that would explain his emotional release now that I was making him talk about it more. Her name was Tanya. Thats what he said. WAS. Well, that could mean shes still alive but not in his life anymoreor it could mean death. Maybe I could ask my father to check her out. No, that is so wrong. I dont want to find anything out that way. I want Edward to tell me on his own. I hate mysteries, this is driving me insane! I wish I could hypnotize him and ask everything I want in one shot. Then I could help him faster. I never knew Id have to play detective in this job. But everyone hides something when you start asking them questions. No one likes to show their bad side and pain on the first few visits. Every body lies. Every body hides. Including me. And what was that about Victoria? She had said she owned him and saved his life and he knew she was right? I caught that but let it go because he was becoming so upset. I have to listen to my tapes again today, closely. I cant wait to talk some more to James. I have to be so careful not to tell him too much. I dont fully trust him, either. Something about his eyes. Theyre not very warm. I wish I could get my notebook. But Im pinned under 200 lbs of perfection at the moment. Gladly. Suddenly, a siren was approaching from way down the street, I think a fire engine. It was high pitched and fast, doing that WOOO-WOOO-WOOO sound. As it got closer, it increased in loudness and I just knew it was going to wake him up. I wish I could reach the window and close itbut it was very hot last night and I was cuddling with my angel so the nice night breezes were heavenly. And the red truck stopped a few buildings down, and the sirens blared on, the engine humming noisily.

EPOV I turned the corner to our street, glad to be close to home now. I was tired and aggravated and needed to close my eyes for awhile. My eyes immediately saw blue and red flashes cops. Slowing down a little bit, I peered ahead of me in the darkness. There are cars everywhere. Our place is way up at the other end of the road so there must be some arrest or accident around here. The whole fucking road is blocked, how the hell am I supposed to get through now? Maybe theyll move and let me pass. Pulling up, not able to drive any further due to all the police cars and people standing around, I stopped near the police officer who was standing there, talking on a radio. Sir, you cant come through here now. The cop said to me, hardly glancing at me as he talked on his radio, ignoring me.

How do you suggest I get home with all this in my way? I had an attitude, too exhausted to be polite at this point. I dont care how you get home, Sir, the cop talked like a robot, with no tone, Back up and go around, thats all I can tell you. He began to turn and walk away from me and I called him, very pissed off now. Officer! I shouted but he kept walking away. I was going to call again or maybe get out of the car but I really didnt need to get arrested right now, either. Fucking asshole. I muttered, putting myself in reverse and turning, holding the passenger side headrest as I drove straight back, withdrawing myself from my own god damned street, Unbelievableits 4 oclock in the morning I drove all the way around, going past my apartment building, then 10 more blocks past that before I could turn and come around. Now it was nearly 5am and I was extremely angry and annoyed. On this other end, I could hear sirens wailing. And again, more police cars blocking the road, cops standing around, scratching their asses, earning my tax payer dollars. Bullshit! I sneered, screeching my car to the curb and getting out, slamming the door loudly as I walked towards them, about five of them over here. Sir, sir one of them said to me, This street is closed, please go back to your vehicle. What?! I squinted and tried to see down the street for my building but it was dark and the police lights were blinding me from seeing shit. This is MY street! I explained a bit loudly, I live here, how can the street be closed?! I tried to walk around them but one of the taller cops yelled at me and moved in front of my path, blocking me. Sir! he yelled again, Go BACK to your VEHICLE I said! I just want to go home and go to BED, JESUS! I frowned and shouted back, You cant tell me I cant go to my apartment! What the hell is this? Whatd you do, find Bin Laden or something? Another cop approached us as we argued and asked me, What is your problem, sir? My problem is I live on this street and I cant get in there, from either fucking side! I tried to keep my voice down, Its late, I want some sleep and Ive been driving around like a fucking moron, and no one will let me in! Let me see your license. He said to me, opening his gloved hand. Oh, you dont believe me? I laughed to myself, shaking my head and going for my wallet in my back pocket, Fine. Here. I took it out and gave it to him, squinting and trying to see down the street and he looked at it, then stared at me for a second.

See? I tried to smile, taking my license out of his hand, I wasnt lying to you. Im not a reporter or whatever, I just want to go to sleep. Come with me, Sir., the cop took my arm and I thought for a second he was going to arrest me, but he began walking quickly past the cars that were blocking me and I walked with him, keeping up, guessing Id get my car tomorrow after they were done doing whatever they were doing here. In a couple minutes, I could see my building and was about to say to the cop, Thats my building. But I stopped and I saw it. And I froze. A huge burst of sound, a BOOM! Uuggghhh!!! I jerked up, my body tensing as I shouted, gritting through my teeth. I felt shaky and my breathing was fast and too hard. My chest was stinging. Hey you. A sweet soft voice was right beside me as my eyes focusedor tried to. Are you okay? Bellas voice asked, her hands touching my cheeks as my eyes darted around on their own, You were having a little nightmare, there, I think. Oh I calmed myself down, Sorry, Bella. Shhh. She kissed my cheek, wiping my face with her thumbs a little bit, Was it scary? She smiled and wrapped her arms around me tight as we were sitting up in front of each other. I hugged her to me and kissed her neck, cuddling my nose in and answering, Yes, terrifying. There was this girl named Bella who never shut up and no matter what I tried, she never stopped talking. Bastard! she squirmed in my arms as I started biting her neck and her little laughing screams were like medicine, melting all my anxiety away in a few seconds I rolled over her as she play squealed and tried to struggle but I soon pinned her down, holding her little wrists down as I licked her mouth, teasing her with little licks, not letting her get my tongue as she bit at the air, missing me. Got you. I informed her, Again. Oh, you think so? she smirked confidently. Yes I do. I came back, just as confidant, licking up the skin under her chin as she moaned and wiggled her hips under mine. Why did you do that? I almost complained. And then, my penis was awake, hard and poking into my little Bella, Look what you did, you naughty little thing. She laughed, not sorry in the least. Now, just for that, I think youll be my prisoner today. I smiled, kissing her again, deeper. I thought.KISSI was your prisoner yesterday. She said as I kissed her again.

No. I corrected, getting another kiss, You were my victim yesterday. KISS. Today, youll be my prisoner. KISS. Which is an entirely different thing altogether. What does that mean? she smiled as if she trusted me and I got my face into her loose robe, placing a kiss right inside her right breast, hearing her give a deep moan already. I tie you up, maybe here, to the bed I began, kissing her again, Then I make you a nice breakfastand I feed it to youKISSthen I brush your little teeth for youKISS MMMmm she kissed me back, Brush my teeth? And then what? Then I ravage you for a few hours I kissed her deeper, and added, And keep making you come until youre screaming for mercyand waterbut you wont get anynot from meKISS. That would be amazing she smiled, If only I didnt have school today. No I said into her mouth as I kissed her, Im not letting you go. Ill write a note to your teacher, signed, Dr. Frankencock. She giggled and squirmed as I moved my lips lower, moving her robe aside with my nose and licking the sweet pink nipple staring up at me. He wont like it. She said as she stared up at the ceiling, He might discipline me tomorrow. Absolutely not. I bit down on the nipple now as she howled out a tiny scream, then through my teeth I added, Youre my little dolly. She curled her legs around mine and just when I thought maybe she would stay here with me today, her alarm clock rang out, that annoying buzzing. Reaching over to it, she hit the snooze button, silencing it for now. Mmmm.. I groaned, What time do you have to go today? In about an hour. She frowned down at my face as I licked around her nipple, at the same time I stared back at her sad little eyes. I dont think I like itthe way you leave me all the time. I smirked at her, Arent you afraid what trouble I could get into, being all by myself all day? Horrified. She smiled down at me, You dont have any appointments today? No, Bella. I said with a grin. Well, I am going to class early and will get back early enough, around 1 today., she said. Good. I said, sounding very pleased, Perhaps today we can play out another little game I think you might enjoy. Her face blushed hot red and her lips smiled at me. Perhaps., she teased. This one is a littlewild. I warned her, But youll be totally safe with me and if you ever feel like you want it to stop

I know, lo mein. She grinned, looking a little excited but nervous. Such a clever girl. I kissed her again, loving the taste of her. Come on, Ill make you something to eat. I yanked her out of bed as I went to the kitchen, Is it okay if I remove my shirt now that its daytime again, Mistress? It is getting a little warm now, this apartment heats up fast when the sun rises. And also, I just wanted to see her expression when I said it. And it was priceless! Her bottom lip hit the floor with a crash. I chuckled and waited for her reply. Yes, slave boy, strip., she joked, watching me take off my new favorite shirt. I folded it carefully and put it on the bed so I could wear it later tonight. She excused herself to go to the bathroom and I began to mix batter for pancakes. It was too quiet in here so again, I snuck on the nick channel and sure enough, there was Sponge Bob. I heard Bella laughing in there at me as the water inside the room went on and a flush sounded. Today I had it on my to do list to fix that door and the hole in the bathroom wall Id made my second morning here. I didnt know what else Id be doing all day. I hope she gives me something I can do. As I stirred up the pancake batter, my mind kept going back to last night. She held me all night long. She stroked my hair and kissed me while I laid there in her embrace, fighting the fucking tears of guilt and shame that wouldnt stop. I told her Id fucked another woman yesterday and she didnt even blink. Why is she so nice? So calm? Or maybe that means she doesnt feel all that strongly about me and doesnt care who else Im with as long as Im here for her when shes home. But thenI felt how much she careswhen she put that shirt on me last nightand said what she saidI felt love. I almost didnt remember it at first, but it quickly came back to me. And her arms around me felt so god damn amazing that I really felt like a real man for a few hours. I felt clean. I felt I dont know how Im going to be able to sit on this stool now after yesterday. Bella said, sitting on one of them to sit at the counter, watching me make the pancakes now. I turned and smiled wickedly at her, Ive only just begun to play with you, Bella. Wait until you see what Ive got planned in the next couple of days. I hope your bravery holds out. Stop trying to scare me. She joked and smiled as I gave her a glass of orange juice. I did my best evil laugh, sounding like a cheesy villain from an old movie as she giggled with me and I poured batter onto the flat pan beneath me. So, are you gonna tell me? she asked mysteriously, drinking the juice. Tell you what? I asked, truly not knowing what she was referring to.

Your nightmare. She replied calmly, You must know that Im very good at interpreting dreams. I tensed for a second then made myself relax right away. I didnt need an interpretation. The dream was clear and I knew what it was. Do you know that you talk in your sleep? I asked her, getting her off the subject. My eyes looked at her and I raised a brow at her as her cheeks flushed redly at my whim. God, that is sexy. I flipped a pancake or two over as she was the nervous one now, on the hot seat. Ive been told her voice was very timid and quiet now, that. What did I SAY? Mmmm. I played with her now, putting three pancakes on a plate, Amazing, perversehot thingsthings Ill never tell you. I placed her plate in front of her as her mouth formed a thin line. Come on. She pleaded. Nope. I put the plastic bottle of syrup down on the counter and handed her a fork, too. Brat. She fumed and pouted. She was so adorable I nearly laughed and told her. But no, that is my little secret. I wanted to keep it to myself for awhile. She huffed and started to eat as I got my own plate and sat across from her at the counter. At least she forgot about asking about my dreams. Edwardcan I ask you something? Sure. I said, hoping it was something I could answer. Last night, you said Victoria told you, that first time youworked for herthat she owned you and saved your life. Is that for real, or is that like, an expression? No. I answered, taking a bite of pancake oozing with syrup, She did own me, at first. And she really did save my life. I had borrowed a lot of money from this loan shark someone told me about. Even when I took it, I knew I couldnt ever pay it backand they want it back plus interest. I was kinda back on the streets for a few days then and I just kept walking and taking trains, to anywhere, randomly, trying to hide from them. Then, one night my luck ran out and I heard them following me. It was real late at night, I think around 2 in the morning or something, and they grabbed me, took me into an alley and proceeded to beat the shit out of me, asking for their money. I didnt really know how to fight back then, and even if I did, its not much of a fair fight, one guy holding you while the other punches you in the face and stomach. Anyway, this alley happened to be behind Fire, and Emmett heard the whole thingand he beat those guys up and brought me into the club, into the back door. I was pretty hurt, had some broken ribs. Emmett had me in the dressing room and was taking care of me, taping them up. Victoria soon showed up in there and thats when I met her. She was very nice, she said I had a nice chest and then said she was going to call an ambulance but then the loan sharks busted in the back door and demanded me.

I knew I was dead, they had their guns cocked and even when Victoria asked what they wanted, they said they wanted to take me out back and shoot me in the face. They were pissed and hurt after Emmetts attack. I started to stand up to go with them and Emmett shoved me down into my chair and stood in front of me. And then Victoria stood in front of Emmett. She asked them how much I owed them. Victoria told them to give her 15 minutes and theyd get their money. She took me up to her office and made me take all my clothes off. She told me toshow her how much I wanted to live and then if I was good enough, maybe shed pay those guys and save me. Idid it with herand then she paid my debt. The loan sharks left, paid, telling me I was lucky and not to ever go to them for money again. Then Victoria turned to me and told me that she owned me now and I would work for her and do anything she said. And thats when I started to work at Fire. Edward she said in a low voice, staring at her plate, her fork picking at the pancakes. She saved me. I stated simply, hearing the pity in Bellas voice, She didnt have to, she couldve let them kill me. And I thought I was dead, even after I did Victoria. I thought I didnt do well because I was hurt and had broken ribs and it hurt like hell, but I guess she liked me enough to help me out. I kept eating and saw Bella staring at her glass of juice now, thinking about something I couldnt read in her eyes. Why did you borrow money, why did you need all that money? she asked, looking at me. I told youI was broke. I hoped shed just leave it at that. But this is Bella and she didnt. But you wouldnt go to loan sharks to borrow money just for rent or something, thats insane. I laughed. Arent you supposed to refrain from words like insane when youre talking to your patients? Thats not very Dr. Bella of you. Im not Dr. Bella right now. She informed, a tad frustrated now. I was finished eating and it looked like she wasnt hungry, either. Are you done? I asked. No, Im not done. I just want to know you, Edward. She sounded so lost and small suddenly, Im not trying to pry, I just wish you would trust me more. I told you, I am your friend. You can talk to me. I smirked and looked down into her sweet little eyes, correcting myself. No, I meant I lifted her plate a little, Are you doneeating? Oh. She turned bright red again and I couldnt stifle a little snicker, Yes, thank you.

Bella I began carefully as I put the dishes near the sink, I know you want to know meand I am trying very hard to help you and answer your questions. I really am. But there are some things I just cant tell you. Things if I told you, you wouldnt understand. I do trust you and I cant believe that only 3 days in, Im telling you what Im telling you. But there are some doors that are locked forever and will never open again. Do youunderstand that? Yes. She looked a little defeated as she looked at me, and added, But I will keep trying and you cant get mad at me for that. Its my job. Its not really about my grade in school anymore, Edward. I really want to help you. You are. I walked up to the counter, taking her face in my hands and kissing her, Do you know how long its been since someone has held me? KISS. And wanted to talk to me? KISS. I am so sorry that Im making it hard for you. I leaned my forehead to hers and closed my eyes, smiling, and saying, You make me feel real, Bella. I like this. She let out a breath and she stood up, holding me closer as I placed another small kiss against her sweet, syrup tasting mouth. Go get dressed for school, Bella. I said before I decided to take her right here on the countertop.

BPOV I was still deep in thought about Edward as I walked with the girls to school. They asked me how things with Edward were going and I just said, Fine. I didnt want to tell them anything and I knew they were a little upset or hurt at my silence, but I didnt care. I was so hurt and sad and confused, frustrated and feeling incompetent, giddy in love and heartbroken at the same time. He would never leave this lifestyle. He said so. And he didnt fully trust me, either. But what did I expect, its only been 3 days. I expected too much, I didnt want to work hard for it. I decided to stop being a little brat and be more patientand to keep trying. Dont give up became my new motto. That bitch, Victoria! He really talked as if he trusted her, but he cant trust me? I bet she knows his whole life story. What a pimp ! How could she do that to him? I fantasized the whole scene in my head Edward sitting there, his shirt off as Emmett wrapped white tape over the broken bones, the bruises coloring his white skin darkly as he held a cloth to his bleeding mouth. OWWWW Edward groaned, wincing as the tape pulled them together snugly. And then Victorias voice came floating up behind Edwards bare back. Well, well, well she cooed, What do we have here? Oh, Emmett stood up and Edward half turned towards her, holding a hand over the taped area of his body, Victoria, this is Edward. He was having a little trouble out back and I brought him inside to patch him up a little bit.

Emmett, youre so cute Victoria smiled at Edward as she spoke to Emmett, running her hand through Edwards bronze locks, then down his back, Always taking in strays Im sorry, I should go. Edward cringed, holding his ribs as he tried to stand and pick up his crumpled shirt. No, no, no Victoria eased him back down into the chair as Emmett did the same, Staythis is my place and youre my guest. How about a nice drink and something to eat? And Ill call an ambulance if you need one. Oh no, I couldnt he was probably embarrassed that he was hungry but at the same time, proud. I insist. Victoria smiled, stroking the back of her fingers along his cheek, You look hungry, my love. Im going to get you a nice juicy steak, Edward. Let Emmett help you, hes very good at taking care of bruises and things. Stay. She walked away and gave Emmett a look. I imagined a friendly conversation between Edward and Emmett about who those guys were who were beating him and whyand then Victoria brought him a nice hot meal and probably sat there, with him and Emmett, listening to the whole story as Edward ate, not able to resist the scent of steak cooking. It was probably days since he had last eaten. And then, perhaps, by this time, the loan sharks or their henchmen, whatever they were, probably came to in the alley and were now very pissed and busted in the back door of the club, wanting revengewanting Edward. Like Edward said, I saw them in my mind, guns in hand, staring at a frightened but still Edward. Get up, pretty boy., one of them sneered in my vision, Time to pay. Emmett stood up right away, a bulking wall of muscle. You want some more? Emmett threatened more violence on the pair, smiling and ready, standing in front of Edward. They cocked their guns at Emmetts face and one of them said, Unless you can catch bullets in your teeth, youll get out of the way and let us transact our business. Stay out of it. Its none of your concern. Edward stood up and held his hand against his right side, saying, Emmett, dont. Hes right, Ill go with them. Sit down, Edward. Victoria stood up, frowning and saying to the men, This is MY place, how dare you come in here with GUNS?! Victoria, no!, Edward lightly scolded her, not wanting her to get hurt, either. That little cock sucker owes us a lot of money! one of the men shouted, We were going to let him have one more day, after a little warning, but now were pissed! That goon of yours put a lump on the back of my head and broke my partners hand! Be glad were just shooting pretty boy, there, in his cute little face and not your boy, too.

Wait here. Victoria said with a wicked tone of voice to them, I will go upstairs, have a little talk with Edward, here, and then I will bring you your money, in cash. She slowly moved, standing in front of Emmett now, protecting her dancer. Edwards face frowned in confusion and hesitation as he looked at her, but she kept her eyes on the men with guns. You think were stupid? one of them asked, Were not waiting around while you call the cops. She scoffed and Emmett laughed. Cops. She laughed to herself, I have drugs and whores in private rooms fucking clients here, you think I call copsfor any reason? I dont need a cop, I can fuck you two up all by my self. This is not my first time, you know. They looked quickly at each other, thinking. I know that you work for someone else. Victoria informed so calmly, smiling, And that if you dont get his money tonight, you are both in a lot of trouble yourselves. You may get a little pleasure out of killing Edward, but then youll never get your money. And what will your boss say to you, then? They looked nervous and swallowed, realizing she was right. Give me a moment to deal with Edward. Victoria backed up and took Edward by the hand, Once we work out our business, and if that goes well, Ill bring your money down to you myselfin cash. Thats the deal. Take itor leave it. Finally, one of them said, Hurry up. Certainly. Come, Edward. Victoria gave a charming smile and led Edward away with her, asking Emmett to chat with them until she got back. The walk down the hallway and over the red line that led into the full, dark club mustve been difficult for Edward, with broken ribs. He probably saw, then, the dancers and the women and the cage as she silently led him up the stairs to her private office. The office door closed and she turned the lock, a deadbolt, walking a few steps away from him, sitting on her desktop and looking at him, crossing her long, creamy legs. Edward, Edward, Edward she shook her head, Tsk, tsk, tskyou are in a terrible predicament, arent you, my love? He stood close to the locked door, smart enough to know what she wanted from him. Not used to being in this type of situation, his nostrils flared and his jaw set, his mouth a hard line, his eyes going to the floor, desperately empty as he tried to think a way out of this mess. You cant pay them all that money. He said with a dull tone of voice, And why would you? You dont even know me. Well, thats why I brought you up here. Victoria put her hands on the desk at her sides, smiling and toying with him, her eyes moving over his chest, Were going to get to know each otherand if I like you, Ill pay those assholes. After which point, you will be mine, completely, until you pay back your debt. Youll do

everything I say, and work for me. Orif not, you can limp your ass back downstairs, go with those guys outside and let them fuck your mouth with their guns before they shoot you. I know those guys. I know who they work for. They wont kill you quickly. It will take a long, long time. And when they kill you, youll be glad. What do you want? he asked, his arms holding his ribs as he hunched over a little, leaning against the door. Take off your clothes, everything. She said, right to the point, unashamed. His eyes widened and darted up to hers at this and she held her stare back at him, showing him she wasnt kidding. He didnt move for a bit, his breathing increasing just a tad as he thought over his options, not liking either of them. You dont want to die, do you, Edward? she pushed gently with her words, You have something to live for, dont you? You dont want to lose it forever, do you, Edward? After a minute, Victoria rolled her eyes and said, Oh, come on, Edward, do you really prefer a painful death over ME? Edward stood there another minute, then finally closed his eyes for a second or two, his hands unbuttoning his pants and unzipping them, exhaling and pulling them down, groaning in a bit of pain from his ribs. Victoria grinned, nodding a couple times as he kicked off his boots, removing the pants, letting them sit in a puddle on the carpet, and then quickly removing his underwear before he let himself think about it too much. He leaned back to the door now with a disturbed expression, his arms tense and his right hand clung to his left arm, his hands fists, covering his genitals as his body shivered a bit, his eyes on the floor below him. Relax, love, relax she smiled at his innocence and felt aroused, Its only skin, I see it every day. Turn aroundslow. Let me see you, angel. With a shudder, he slowly made himself turn around. The motion seemed to take an eternity but finally his ass was facing her and he let his head hit the door with a little thud, resting it there, his eyes closed as his breathing increased and became troubled. Victoria even thought she heard him whimper. Are you crying? she giggled, Jesus. He didnt answer. You have a good ass. She gave her professional opinion, A little more muscle wouldnt hurt. Youll work out everyday from now on. Emmett will show you. Turn back around. He obeyed her, his eyes wet and cold as he looked at her, his mouth in a cement frown. Put your arms down. She ordered, waiting.

He hesitated again and she smiled, saying, Those guys arent going to wait forever. And if they shoot Emmett while theyre waiting, thatll be all your fault. Exhaling again, he stiffly put his arms at his sides, pinning them against the door as if something was holding them their against his will. Wow. She looked impressed, I see why you were protecting that. Very good, Edward. Make it hard. His eyes darted up to hers. What? he breathed, in disbelief. Make. It. Hard. She spelled it out slowly as if he were slow or something. I cant justmake ithard he looked humiliated, Im not a machine! Sure you are. She said without emotion, Were all machines. If you want to live and survive, you better make yourself a machine. Now. If you belong to me, I wont tolerate this hesitation and there will be no coddling. Im not a kindergarten teacher and youre no child. Stop wasting my time and make it hard. She gave him a minute or two and he closed his eyes, struggling internally. And soon, he was erect and hating it. Come here, Edward. She demanded without pity. She pulled up her little dress, exposing her small patch of red hair between her legs as he slowly approached, his face full of turmoil and pain. Lesson one. Victoria held his chin in her soft, perfumed hand, shaking it a little, Lose that face. No tears, no disgust, no frownsmile. He let out a tortured breath at this remark and she frowned at him squeezing his face a little harder, Smile, Edward. Make me believe you want me. His lips turned up at the corners a bit, trying to smile but his eyes were full of loss and hurt. Come on, try again she cooed sweetly, seeing him trying, Let me see your pretty smile, love. He smiled more but it never touched his eyes. We can work on that later. She looked disappointed, Fuck me. Victoria his eyes clenched shut for a moment. Now. She laid back on her desk, I like it hard and rough. No kissing. Although youll learn to do that for clients later. Come on, Edward, tick tock. Without a word, he came closer to her, and winced as she put her legs up on his shoulders, resting them there, waiting. Make it good, Edward. She warned, Make me cum and Ill pay your bill. The bell rang and I jumped sharply, seeing James standing in front of the class, putting down his chalk and dusting off his hands, Thats it. Have a good day, people. Shit. Class is over and I dont think I heard a word of it. Crap, I hope theres no test on anything he just said.

I took my bag and began to walk out, falling near the back of the crowd and following as I heard James ask, You alright, Bella? I snapped alert and turned to him, stopping. Yea, fine. I lied. The rest of the kids were out now and James smirked, knowing better, I know that look on your face. That was the Im a million miles away - look. Im a psych professor, I know these things. Im sorryI justwandered, I guess I tried to explain it, failing miserably. Come here, sit down. He offered me a desk in the front row, and sat at the one beside me, Talk to me, Bella. Whats on your mind? I was stupidI was hurtingand feeling like I was failing Edwardand without thinking about it, I started to cry. I felt like a damn fool and worse, a little girl and I was humiliated that James was seeing me like this. He must think Im such a screw up. Uh oh. James said calmly, going to his desk and coming back with a real cloth hankerchief, giving it to me. I took it and held it over my mouth, more to block the little sobs threatening to come out. Something inside me was in great pain and I had been holding it in, and now I couldnt stop it. Shhhh.. James sat down next to me again, waiting for me to speak. Im never gonna be a psychiatist. I wept through the cloth. Yes you will, Bella. James said, unflinchingly, And youll be a great one. Im so afraid to ask what Im supposed to ask. I cried, the tears really falling now, And afraid of what his answers will be. And Im so scared hell get mad and leave if I ask things too hard to answer. And I want to help him but he keeps pushing me away. And I hate hurting him with my questions. He cried last night and I wanted to die. Just when I think Im starting to know him, he doesnt answer me and he wants to talk about sex again. Alright, youre talking about Edward. James said, confirming to himself aloud, I know hes a tough first patient and I warned you it would be difficult. Sex is his crutch, his shield to hide behind. You know that already. But you can do this. Youre not afraid like thinking hell turn violent, are you? No. I sniffed, Hes not violent. Images of him holding his hand over my mouth flashed to mind and my body felt warm for two seconds. Okay. James stared at me, a pleasant look on his face, as far as I could tell through my tears, What is it youre afraid of, Bella? If I tell youpromise me youll never say anything I heard my voice whimper. I promise, Bella. James squinted a bit, Doctors oath, remember? I care about him. I was sobbing a little again, I think

Think what, Bella? James put a hand on my back. I sugarcoated it and said, I think Im havingfeelings for him. The truth was I was deeply in love with him and knew I could never get out of it now. I wanted to be with him forever, but I knew that was impossible for us. A million and three things stood in our way and I know he can never love me in return, after all hes been through. It would take a miracle for him to even say the words I love you and mean them. And even it he did, we still had one million and two more obstacles to overcome. I felt like I was looking at a field of mountains as the winds blew and the thunder crashedand I already felt tired. We could never make it. We would never make it. Bella. James rubbed my back as he spoke calmly, not acting surprised, This is very common. Especially when youre still learning like you are. Its okay to care about him, thats what a good therapist does. But you cant have feelings for him, Bella, you cant. You have to stop yourself. I know you said hes very attractive and its his job to be charming and flirty and lure you in. Hes a master manipulator from what Ive heard of him so far and he will keep doing it, even if he doesnt realize hes doing it. You cant let him seduce you that way, Bella. You have to be stronger than him. I cant let him seduce methat is for to laugh, I heard my inner teenager quip as I recalled the seven orgasms, him ramming himself into me from behind, the stool, the counter, the shower, the massage! He had already seduced me numerous times and not only my body my mind, my heart, my soul even! I quieted a little and croaked, What if Im not? Then you have to let him find a real doctorand you have to let him go. James said certainly, For his sake as well as yours. You cant help a drowning person if youre drowning, too, can you? James loved the drowning person image. I guess he had stuck that into my mind also, thats how I saw Edward last night. No. I sniffed, wiping my eyes with the hankerchief. Youll be alright, Bella. James smiled and looked at me closer, Would you like me to drive you home? No. I began to stand, I can walk, its so nice outside. Alright. He stood with me, patting my shoulder, Have a nice evening. Keep your chin up. Thanks. I went to hand him back his hankerchief and he held a hand up, saying, Keep it, sweetie. Yea, I guess he doesnt want it back now, after I slobbered all over it. I folded it and tried to smile at him as I left class, him right behind me, saying goodbye again as he went towards the parking lot and I walked off campus, towards home.

BPOV By the time I reached home, I did feel a lot better but more like an idiot for breaking down in front of James that way. I guess I needed to let it out, though, and really did feel as if I had been cleansed, in a way. My problems were not gone by any means, but I told myself that I could handle this. I would have to try harder with Edward and keep my feelings for him light and not get too heavy with him. I feared me holding him all night would scare him away more but this morning he did voice that he had enjoyed being held and I truly believed him. He said I made him feel real. I got misty eyed even now, recalling his voice saying those words. From now on, I would have to be happy with our time together, enjoy it, try my best to help him, stop being afraid to hurt his feelings, and stop being scared to make him angry. I would have to start doing my jobno matter what. I missed him again, even though in my thoughts, I never really left him. His kiss this morning when I left was the most powerful one yet and I did find myself trusting him, despite my brains warnings. This I felt in the heart. And my heart wasnt listening to my mind at this point. This was certainly going to end in disaster and I knew that, too. When I reached the top of the stairs, part of me was paranoid and looking around, wondering if Edward would jump out from behind me again to do a repeat of yesterdays performance. But, sadly, no rapist on my stairs today. Instead, there was a note inside on the kitchen counter. A little gold sticky note that read only Put a tank top and skirt on and come to me. There was an address, this was a few blocks away, in town. I felt my lips smile and I went to my room to follow my instructions right away, wondering what was going on but the mystery and anticipation was making me crazy. I even put a little more makeup on, looking at myself in the full length mirror in my bathroom. I didnt look bad at all, I thought, unusually, as I looked over my little white tank top that held my breasts up and together quite nicely, giving me a pretty little cleavage, and my light, airy gauze red mini skirt, along with a cute pair of shoes Alice got me last month, red high heels, and a strap that went around my ankle, very sexy. I bet Edward will love these. I almost didnt wear underwear but decided against it, not sure what the plan was exactly. Besides, if a nice stiff wind blew up, my skirt was so sheer it would fly up with it and Id give everyone on the street a nice little peep show. I fixed my hair and even used a little perfume, then I hurried out, only taking a little red purse with me to hold my house key in. I went back and put a couple of condoms in there, too, Just in case. With Edward, I was never sure what he was up to. I had the little sticky note in hand and got to the street he had written. Now I just had to locate the right building. 243, 243I needed. All these buildings were stores, shops, restaurantsmaybe hes meeting me for lunch.

Okay, this is 216 where I am now. I needed to cross the street and keep walking a little bit more. I passed people and a couple of men smiled at me as I went by and I felt myself blush. Men are too easy. Just wear a little makeup and some high heels and their tongues are hanging out. I reached 243 and saw it was a book store. The Guardian the sign said. I looked at my note and in the window. It was huge inside, very empty people wise, an older man sitting at the register in front, reading a book, his glasses perched down his nose, appearing bored. Why would Edward want me to come here and wear a skirt and tank top? Maybe this is wrong. I went to the door and opened it, a little bell ringing merrily as I stepped in. The old man straightened up, pushing up his glasses as the dim light from the sun made a little white spot against his almost bald head. Smiling at me, he was the soul of friendliness and customer service. Good afternoon, Miss. He stood alertly at his post. Good afternoon. I grinned back, looking around. It was very silent and pleasantly a bit dark in here, not lots of bright lights, only the sun from the window giving some light inside. Rows and rows of books went far back into the store and it looked darker the further back they went. May I help you find anything special, my dear? he asked, trying to be helpful. Yea, wheres my hot demon Edward? Umm, no thanks, Ill just browse around, if thats alright. I replied timidly. Certainly. He gave a nod, Take your time. Call me if you need anything. Thanks. I glanced back at him, slowly walking down the tall bookcases that were as tall as the ceiling. I peeked into each row, looking for Edward, finding no one. I think Im the only one in this store. There were red signs here and there that said things like, Please return books to shelves correctly. Thank you. As I walked further in, I gasped. There were stone pillars and marble columns and back here, the ceiling raised up in a cathedral style, looking now like a church, a castle with lots of dark rows of bookcases that reached about thirty feet over my head. This is amazing ! So beautiful! It wasnt a nice, bright, cheery looking castle, either. It looked medieval, dark, and a feeling of foreboding crept inside me. This must be a converted church or something I told myself, seeing large tables over against the wall, with chairs to sit and read at, and it was very dim over there. There was one lamp on each table but they were shut off, I guess to save electricity if no one was in here reading. I looked for about ten minutes and didnt see another soul in this place. The old man was worlds away now, at the front of the store and I was wondering if maybe he or I had made a mistake somewhere in the plan. I turned to start walking back but then I noticed a long aisle going to the left I hadnt checked yet and a sign over the aisle read Sexual Help.

My mouth smiled and I muttered to myself, You prick I know hes in there, I just know it. Slowly, I went towards the aisle and peeked in. No one there. I looked around. No one anywhere. I walked inside the aisle and was both comforted and nervous about the dimness surrounding me. One small light shone up from the ceiling but I began to browse at the books I was walking past. I let my fingers touch one or two of them, and then I saw one that looked pretty naughty and right up my aisle. Learning to be a Submissive. Peeking around me, I saw nothing and took a breath, opening the book and flipping into it. Wow! The pictures ! I was mesmerized by the black leather collars and rubber outfitsthe incredible positions they were tied in baffled me and I felt my mouth sitting open as I began to move the book around sideways, trying to figure out if she was upside down or not. Ive read that one.,a deep male voice said behind me and I screamed out loud, throwing the book up into the air and feeling it hit me in the nose as it fell to the floor. That whole thing had happened in one second. A small chuckle came from the voice behind me and I didnt look yet. I squatted down to pick the book up and I began to shove it back into its tight place in the bookcase but the hand behind me reached out and took it from me. I knew it was Edward but I was trying to recover from my heart attack with some shred of maturity. Also, I wanted my face to cool so he wouldnt see me blushing. I hated blushing. A submissives role is to serve and to give pleasure. His husky voice read out of the book behind me, But it must be a gift, given to her Master freely and with complete love and affection. I almost went to turn towards him but stopped myself. His hand slowly moved up the side of my leg and traveled up inside my skirt, stroking delicately up and down. A submissive is a volunteer. He read, his voice like molten lava sex, A slave is not a volunteer. His free hand was high up my outer thigh, massaging a little more deeply now, moving along behind me, under my panties, caressing my right ass cheek as he kept reading. Your Master may lash your body with his whip, he read, his fingers clutching the side strap of my panties, But it is also his pleasure to kiss and caress the pain away. He began to pull my panties down a bit and I looked straight ahead, seeing through the bookcase, over the tops of the books before me, and looked around in horror for other people. This is a public placeoh nois he going to.right here in the middle of a store? Holy fuck!! I can see myself now, calling my father to bail me out because I was caught fornicating in a book store. Does any of thatinterest you? he asked, not reading from the book anymore.

He was kind of asking if I wanted to go further and I kept looking through the cracks, into the next aisle. His hand waited, not moving my panties down yet. I was shaking all over and answered, Yes. Mmmmm his voice purred as he put the book back into its place and then both of his hands were under my skirt, stroking up and down my legs. His body was right up against me, behind me, pressing his hard penis into my ass. I felt his mouth kiss the cotton over my back and I smiled to myself, glad I skipped wearing the bra this once. I remember angry rapist yelling about it yesterday. His fingers roamed under the easy little skirt and rubbed more firmly over the front of my panties, moving up and down right in the creases between my thighs and crotch. I put my head back against his shoulder and sighed, trembling all over as his lips and tongue traveled all over the inside of my neck. Shoving my long hair aside with his face he began to take bites and rougher kisses. I could feel his hands slide down into my panties and fingers touched my clit and traveled down the little hair inside. I gasped out, then quieted myself as he whispered darkly into my ear. Im going to fuck you Bellaright hereright now his voice made me even wetter as I shivered more, Do you want me? Yes. I whispered, feeling a little dizzy from the fear and excitement at the same time. You little sluthe seethed in my ear, So horny, you will let me fuck you right in the middle of a bookstoreyou should be ashamed of yourself. Yes, Edward. I said as subserviently as Edward always says yes, Bella, to me all the time. I heard him chuckle again. His hands slowly moved my panties down and he squatted down with them then said, Lift your feet outhold on. I lifted one high heeled foot out of the panties and then the other, holding onto the shelf in front of me. Shit, look at those shoes! Edward commented as he noticed them more now. I peeked again through the bookcase and then to the side, panting in fear of the old man or another customer walking by and seeing us. He put my panties in between two books, some sticking out a bit as his hands slowly moved over the tank top, up and downup and downcreating hot friction there and his mouth kissing my bare shoulders, lickingsinking teeth in just enough to make me moan out, trying to keep it quiet. I love what youre wearing, Bella. His voice kept dripping sexily into my ear, You are so fucking sexy and you dont even know it. I love that about you. His fingers moved the straps of my tank top sideways, off my shoulders, moving them down and using his fingers that traveled over my breasts to push the top down to my waist, off my naked chest. The top was down around my arms and waist, almost trapping my arms at my sides. His mouth found my lips and he was kissing my mouth hard as my nude breasts became victims of his rough, squeezing hands.

Uuuuhhhhh. I sounded, going from closing my eyes in lust and opening them suddenly to check if anyone was coming. His lips kept probing mine and his tongue fought mine for dominance as his hands traveled down to my skirt again, yanking it up and letting it rest above my bare ass. Step your feet up to the first shelf., he said, his breathing as deep as mine was. I did what he said, hoping I wouldnt fall, clumsy as I was and the high heels were not my usual shoe, either. But I had a little room on the first shelf below me to properly place my shoes down, side by side. My hands held the shelf in front of them and I felt like I was pretty secure here. Apart. He demanded with a stern voice, parting my legs until they were very far apart. They shook a bit and he moved some books in front of me aside, clearing the shelf and ordered, Bend over. I was able to lay my breasts on the shelf and bend a bit now, sticking my ass and vagina, spread eagle, out to him. I kept imagining someone coming and seeing us, even a person coming to the aisle before this one would see my tits and head staring back at them. Yes Edward stroked his fingers along my pussy and began to insert them one finger at a time inside me, pumping them in and out as I tried to moan and gasp as quietly as I could. You are so filthy he whispered, his cock still in his jeans but rubbing and poking my ass as he fucked me with his long cool fingers as they curled deep inside of me, Look at you, moaning and being fucked by my hand in public in the Sexual Help section. His words pushed me closer and closer to the edge and I was so god damned turned on by them, along with the attentions of his hand. I wanted to scream out but clamped my lips down hard, trying to block out my surroundings and just concentrate on him. I had always been the good girl, the nice girl, the plain girl. It felt so stimulating, forbidden and sensual being the filthy little slut that is so horny shed let herself be taken and fucked in the middle of a store like this. Edward is a GOD! Its like he can see into my brain and knows what I need. I was leaning over the shelf now, my breasts propped against their edge as my long hair and face hung slightly into the next aisle, panting and growling, biting my lips down and wincing in pure heat. I could hear his fingers squishing in and out of me, the wetness and the fear intense and red hot. For a long time, he fingered me and licked his fingers, then inserted them again. I came three times from that alone and hardly made that much noise, even though, inside my head I was screaming and howling. I felt like a human book at that point, sitting on a tight shelf, books snugly on both sides of my arms as my ass hung out the other end, legs still wide apart and wobbling to stay on the little edge of the shelves, feet trembling and clawing to stay on the wood below them as I heard Edward behind me, unzipping his jeans.

All Edward could see of me now was my ass and legs from his place behind me and I found that extremely erotic, like I was an object in the shelves, only here for the customers that would come in, needing sexual help, and using me without a word, as if reading me, as I was stuck in here, helpless and trapped. I had no idea when I came in this aisle, how helpful this section would be. He said, sounding like he was smiling before I heard a plastic crinkling, his condom, I guessed and then he was slowly inserting his head into my sopping wet pussy. He kept teasing me, inserting a bit, then withdrawinginserting again a little moreI wanted to scream at him but all I could get out were growls and deep panting breaths. Alright, sexy Bella, he finally chuckled, Ill stop fooling around and get to it. At this, he inserted himself all the way inside me and I gave a semi-scream, trying to take it quietly as he grabbed at my waist, slapping my ass cheeks against his hips as he slammed me over and over, faster and harder. Did you know this was a church before they turned it into a bookstore? he asked as he kept fucking me, messing with my mind as well as with my body, Which means youre being fucked on holy ground, in the most sacred of places, church! I guess that means youre going to hell with me now. I screamed out, unable to restrain myself at that last line. I want to go to hell, if thats where you are. Screw heaven. Clouds and wings are highly overrated. Ill take sex in the cages of flame with Edward insteadany day. I hope no one hears you and comes to find you. He teased and made me worry as he kept pounding me, the slapping sounds a bit louder than my noises of lust. That would be so humiliating for you, Bella he said, his voice a bit strained as he kept pumping, holding my legs for leverage to thrust deeper inside. He let out a very deep and low growl, coming as I bit my teeth into the edge of the shelf I laid on, trying to hold my own screams in. Edward was panting very hard as he withdrew, making a SSSSSSSS sound, as if he were feeling a very sensitive burn. I heard him zip up and take a step back as my eyes got dizzier. I couldnt even form words right now. See you at home, Bella. , he said and then he walked out of the aisle, leaving me there as I watched his back go by through the next aisle, my hair half over my eyes as he strolled away.

11

BPOV It is 4pm now. Edward had made his private phone call outside and was now sitting in front of me, on the sofa, pleasantly smiling as I hit my record button and said, Edward session four.

Hi, Edward. I began, trying to hide the slight attitude in my voice. Trying to suppress a bigger smile, he responded, Hi Dr. Bella. I knew that was coming and I snorted. Do you even know my last name? Yes. He said without any change in his face, Swan. Do you know mine? I sighed and tried to forget how humiliated I was at being left on a shelf, naked as he walked away from me. Is he trying to make me angry at him? Is he trying to shove me away again? I hate thisI feel like I cant even be mad at him because hes my patient first, lover second. I put a smile on my face and went to my list of questions for him, choosing a lighter one. Tell me about what it was like when you first joined Fire. I said with an icy voice. Wait. He squinted a bit, Whats wrong, Bella? Nothing. I lied, my hands holding a pen so tight, I feared it might break in half. Bella he probed on, his eyes darkening a shade, Youre angry with me. If its one thing I know, its when a woman isnt happy. Have I not pleased you? He was leaning forward, very interested to know how he had hurt me. I hate when he talks like a slave. But its not his fault, this is who he is, who Victoria and all those women have molded him into. Be patient with him. Dont show your anger. Be professional. I was going to deny being angry again but I guessed he was right, he knew what I was feeling, like always. I should be honest with him, even if he doesnt like it. Damn, why does he have to be so sweet and vulnerable now? He looks so sad and sullen, as if hed done something horrible. Just say whats on your mind, Bella. Stir him up a bit. Why did you just leave me there like that?!, I heard my own voice raise before I knew what I was saying, Do you know how embarrassing it is to try and put your panties back on, in high heels, when your legs are so weak that you can hardly stand up, and at the same time, trying to pull your shirt over your naked breasts in a public place, praying to God no one finds you? Youre asking ME this question? he smirked playfully, In my world, thats a delightful little Sunday! Well, in my world, its unbelievably humiliating! I heard my own voice and hated it, I sounded like a 3rd grader. I made my eyes peek at him, seeing his bare chest, a soft, toned wall of muscle, and his snug blue shorts accenting his manhood very definitely. Why does he have to be this fucking beautiful? I cant even be mad at him. Damn him. Im sorry, Bella. His eyes went down, in a submissive way, an ashamed way, and I hated it. I hated that I had done that to him.

You can punish me. he said quietly, Its your right and I wont fight it. As long as you forgive me afterwards. Edward, stop it. I frowned to myself, feeling sick inside, I dont want to punish you. And please dont talk to me like youre my slave. I hate it. But youre angry with me. He looked up at me, his eyes hurt, I am truly sorry. I left you there because it is part of the fantasyI didnt want to leave you. Forget it, I tensed and grabbed my notebook, Lets just go back to our session. Edwards head dropped at that and I heard him exhale a sharp breath. His hands were clutching at his hair again and my heart broke. Tossing my notebook down, I softened my voice, lost my anger and said, Come here, Edward. Please. And I couldnt believe it, but he crawled over the couple feet towards my chair. It was an instinct for him, as natural as a person would rise and walk across the room. It would have been truly pitiful if it wasnt so incredibly erotic and arousing to see this toned, flawless being on his hands and knees, coming to me and kneeling before me, placed his face between the knees of my denim legs, as if ashamed to show his face, his hands curled around my knees too. You didnt have to crawl to me. I said very tenderly, my hand stroking his hair as little tears came to my eyes, A simple apology wouldve been fine. Im sorry, Bella. His voice was a little muffled by my legs and he looked up at me with real regret in his face, I know Im not what you would call normal in the way I make love. Or normal in the way I respond when youre angry. I know normal men would probably yell back at you and maybe storm out, but I cant do that. But I can try to be more normal, from now on, if thats what you want. I want so much to make you happy. You have been so good to meplease justpunish me now. And then we can start over again. I know its not in your nature to be cruel, Bella, but I want you to. If you like, I can think something up myself. Edward I used both my hands to stroke down his cheeks, What have they done to you? So much painso many scarsthey really had broken this man. Over and over again. He just looked at me and waited for my punishment one that would never come. I would never hurt you, Edward. Dont you know that already? I stated clearly and slowly, cuddling my head against his, And I dont want you to try to be more normal. I want youas you areyou do make me happymore than you know. I love the way you make love to meand I would never erase anything weve already done to start over again. And I loved you fucking me in that book store, Edward. Right or wrong, it was the best sex of my life, right up there with being tied to the stool. I am just new to all this and I over reacted. I am the one who should be sorry. I dont know why I got so mad. I should be thanking you. Your mind is socreative and sensual. Who else in the world wouldve taken me in the

middle of a store? Dont change, okay? Please? I love your ideas. And I want more. Got it ? Yes, Bella. His voice sounded so relieved that it hurt me more. I kissed him and tried to make it soft and deep and hard at the same time, wishing he could know how much I love him. I wanted to tell him so badly right then. And I knew why I was so angry. Not at anything he did, or for leaving me there in the store, but forleaving me. It made me think that someday he would really leave me, naked and thirsting for more of him, and that he wouldnt even look back. And I would be so desperately alone, broken, as he is right now. But it wasnt his fault. This is all he knew. Fantasy, role play, orgasm, release, fear, anger, hatred, punishment, pain. There was no love for him to experience on a daily basis, besides this 3pm phone call he made everyday. I really wanted to know who it was. I wanted to know who Edward loved. After our kiss, I held him again and he clung onto me, too and we didnt talk for a couple of minutes. Finally, I said, with a hint of kidding in my voice, Now, stand and go over to the couch and sit down like a good little boy so we can have our therapy. Rule #2 no crawling unless youre bleeding to death. Got it, Edward? He snickered and obeyed, saying, Yes, Dr. Swan. Oooh, improvement. Well, besides the him crawling to me bit. He hopped up on the sofa and sat there, respectful as always as I went back to my notebook, adjusting my hair and trying to forget the raw heated feeling of his cock ramming me from behind as I was shoved into the shelf before me. I cleared my throat and decided to change my first question. Edward I was speaking now as a friend and not Dr., Why are you so afraid of anger? It seems like, every time I may act even a little angry, you get very afraid and automatically very Slave-like? he finished, his face still looking calm and relaxed. Yes. I agreed. In my life, anger equals pain and punishment. Its my job to please everyone. And I do that very well. I can handle the pain when I must, I have a high tolerance to it. I can even endure it without screaming, if Im told to. But most women love to hear me scream and beg. Its the rare individual wants me to bear it in silence. But you and Tanya went through a period where you said you were both very angry and frustrated with each other. I reminded. So? he looked hard and flat now. And now you try very hard to please everyone and to hide your angerat all costs. I said, onto something here. Thats how Ive been trained, Bella., he said, looking down at a loose thread on his shorts, Im a machine now.

Didsomething happento Tanya? I made myself ask, getting his eyes to turn up to me suddenly, very guarded and squinting back at me. I mean, what happened, Edward? I made it an open ended question, making my voice quiet and hushed, Did she leave? Do you blame her leaving on your anger with her? Or is it worse than that? I dont want to talk about her. He raised his voice a little bit, trying to control the fire in his eyes as I kept asking questions, Not now, Bella, please? You have to, Edward. I said then I stopped myself in mid sentence, making myself calm down, Scratch that. You dont have to. But I wish you would tell me about it. Not yet., his eyes looked absolutely lost, looking at mine, Please. Alright. I flipped a page in my notebook, This is something Ive been wanting to do with you. This is called word association. What I do is, I say a word, and without thinking, you say the first thing that comes to mind. Alright? Its very easy. Nothing is easy. He said, his voice had a bit of an edge to it. I smirked at him, I guess youre right about that. Ready to play? I smiled at him and he seemed to smile back, relaxing a little. Always with you.,he responded, his eyes smoldering. Stop that or I will punish you. I teased, Ill tie you to a chair and make you watch educational TV all night. Ukkk! he chuckled, shuddering. Okay, here we go. I went to my list of words, Head. Suck. He said automatically then smiled at me wider, as if surprised by his own reply. A little boy snicker escaped his lips as I widened my eyes at him, You said the first thing I think of! Okay, okay. I moved on, Green. Cash. No mystery there. Cash is like his blood in this business. Water. Now! he tensed and then looked at me fast, as if afraid of what hed said. Now? I asked, What does that mean? I dont know, its the first thing I thought of. He looked away, leaning back on the couch, hiding something again. Sing. I moved on. Cook. He grinned and he looked at me, adding, I like to sing when I cooksometimes. Okay. I grinned back, Death.

Easy. He came back with. Long. I said, hoping he didnt make another penis reference. Life. He said. Long life, as in, having a nice, long life? I asked. No. Edwards eyes went a bit cold, looking away, Life is so fucking long. I made a note, understanding him now. He isnt enjoying his life and it is a long, painful thing to endure. Death is easy, quiet, safe, with no more pain. Window. I said. Glass. Count. I said. Whip. He said right away and when I looked at him, he added, When I amwhippedI have to count them off. Count is what they say before theybegin. Something you need to work on, if you ever become a sub, my fair Bella. Okay. I gave him a warm smile, remembering my bad counting on the stool, hiding my sorrow for him again. Friendly. Smile. He said. Table. Serve. He answered and I think I got that one. Part of his job was to serve drinksand himselfto those tables. I had seen that myself. Village. Idiot. He chuckled and I joined him. Cold. Ice., his answer came back. Ice and snowor ice cubes? I asked, having a pretty good idea. He smirked back at me, impressed that I read this one right. Very good, Bella. He purred his approval, Cubes. Yes, I saw that the night I met you. I commented, Those ladies love rubbing ice on you, dont they? Only because Im so red hot. He joked, laughing at my face as he said it. Okay, note to self, the ego is completely intact. I joked back. Dance., I went on. Slow. He said. Slow dancing, with a girl? I asked, unsure.

No. he looked confused for a second, Were taught to dance slowat Fire. Victoria likes that. The clients like that. Its moresensual. His answers are definitely giving me some information on how he thinks, thats for sure. Sick. Me. , he said without hesitation. Edward, you are not sick. I looked at him and saw his eyes downcast, Edward, look at me. He did and it looked like it caused him physical pain to do so. You are not sick. I repeated, I dont ever want to hear that again. Alright? He gave a little nod and played with the loose string of his shorts as I went onto the next word. Evil. Bitch., that slipped out of his mouth, too, and he stiffened at his own word. I had to giggle for a second, understanding that completely. Yes, I know youve known a lot of evil bitches. I informed, I get that. Needle. Hurts., he said. I tensed and looked at him, he was looking at me as well and I carefully asked, Youre not talking about a doctors needle, are you? He shook his head. Does that happen a lot? I asked, squinting, Women sticking you with needles? Yes., he admitted, It doesnt leave that big a mark but its pain play. A lot of women love that. Who the fuck are these sick bitches? Jesus, listen to me, every time I hear of anyone hurting Edward I become a ten foot tall, snarling Mama Bear, raging. Okay. I took a breath, Blue. Balls., he said, snickering again. I smiled up at him like the school teacher, tolerant but warning with my gaze. Edward I sniffed, going to the next word, Trip. Gone., he said and then a second later, said, My parents were always going on a trip. They never took me with them. I made a note and Edward smiled, as if a thought dawning on him and he said, But if I think of trip in another way, I guess I could say Bella as my answer. Remember when you tripped with your pants around your ankles when I was your rapist? Hey, this isnt laugh at Bella association.

Sorry., he made his face go serious, trying to behave for me, Ill be good. Lamp. I said. Wish., he replied. Like Aladdins lamp? I smiled, Mr. Cartoon would think of a Disney fable here, I guess. Yea., he admitted, I love that movie. I would love to have three wishes, wouldnt you? Yea. I smiled, looking at his face so happy looking now, What would you wish for, Edward? Hmmm, he thought about it, looking up a bit, his mouth in that adorable little bow like when he slept, Well, I dont know.isnt that between me and my Genie? One wish, then. I bargained, Tell me just one. He hesitated then his eyes looked at me and glazed a bit. I wish I didnt have to be a whore., he said firmly, his voice dripping with sadness and hurtand shame. I felt my stomach flip over from the ache that I felt inside me at thismy voice was horribly void and I wanted to say something comforting and helpfulbut I couldnt. I realized, that would be one of my wishes, too. Along with, I wish to erase all Edwards past and pain, and I wish Edward a lifetime of happiness, even if its not with me. I wish I had a magic lamp. But I dontso therapy has to continueas much as it hurts and sucks for Edward, this is the only real way to get there, to a happy life. You know that, dont you, Bella? his voice finally spoke again, I really do wish my life wasnt this way. I dont enjoy beingthis. You know that, right? Yea, I do. I answered, I knew almost from the beginning thatyou dont do these jobs for the thrill or the adventure of it, like some do. You reallyseem to have no choice. You seem to do it for the money. Is that because you had no money when you were with Tanya and now you feel likeif you dont have enough money, you cant have love or happiness? Or is there something else I dont know about? My voice was calm and gentle as I spoke to him. BellaTanya is not in my life anymore, cant we please stop talking about her? he asked a bit stiffly. Is Tanya sick or hurt? I asked, another theory of mine, Because that would explain why you do this, if youre taking care of her on your own. Is that it? Bella, stop., he warned, clenching his jaw, his eyes closing for a moment. I wanted to keep pushing but that was not the way to have him open up to me. I cannot force him. But I also only have ten days left with him and I feared I would

never hear the whole story in time. Then he would forever be a mystery I could never solve. I gave a little growl and went to my list of words. I kept hitting into brick walls and my head was starting to throb. I feel boxed in, with no way out and no light to shine the way, trapped as surely as he was. Okay, lets do some more words I said, Sin. Work., he said, his eyes now softer and trusting again. I noticed things were fine with him as long as I didnt touch his painful inner scars. Rich. I said. Mean., he countered. Rich people are mean? I asked. Every one Ive ever met., he said without blinking, a little half smile on his mouth. Butarent you rich? I asked. No, Im not., he looked sternly at me, insulted that I called him such a thing. But you make lots of money. I said, Dont you? Some goes to Victoria, the rest goes somewhere else. He informed, crossing his arms. Hes avoiding me again. I sighed, getting used to this. I cant help him if I dont know what all his secrets are. God, I am so impatient. I really need to work on that. Sympathy. I said the next word. Bella., he said with a grin, seeing my eyes look up at him, Bella feels a lot of sympathy for Edward. Doesnt she? I put my notebook down and looked at him, setting my jaw. Yes. I confessed, I do feel very sorry for all you go through, the things you tell mehow youve been hurt all this timeand what its doing to you. But its not going to help you, Edward, my sympathy. Its useless. You talking to me, letting me see whats hurting inside, and us discussing it is whats going to make you feel better and begin to heal. I can be patient and Im trying to be, but I cant keep on asking you questions that you keep refusing to answer. Cant you please tell me something? Anything? Be brave. Take a chance and trust me. I swear to God I will not betray you, Edward. I care about youso much. I thought word association was supposed to be easy., he replied, complaining as his eyes stared at the coffee table ledge. I wanted to cryI nearly did. I went to my list of words and like a robot, said the next one on the list, Pray. Waste., he sneered coldly, clearly not liking that one.

Praying is a waste? of time ? I asked. The biggest., he seethed to himself, his eyes down as his arms crossed defensively. Why? I asked, What have you prayed for? Does it matter? he looked at me, frowning, There is no God, there is no Santa Claus, and prayers dont get answered. Everything in my life is so because I made it so. What do you Next word., he snapped curtly, pinching the bridge of his nose with his finger and thumb. Obviously, I am striking some nerves with these words. Hmmthis is working. Money. I said. Life., he said back. Expensive. I went on without comment. Everything.., he sounded a little bitter then. Unjust. I read. Life., he said. Child. I chose next. And he looked like I slapped him in the face. Pass., he spat out, frowning more. Pass? Pass., he fumed a little more. I made a note of that. Possible child, maybe Tanya was pregnant at some point. Divorce. I said, looking right up into his eyes. He hesitated. Things were raging behind his eyes and it scared me a little. Edward, I said gently, Youre supposed to answer right away, first thing that comes to mind. No answer. Edward, are you and Tanya divorced? I went out on a limb here. His eyes looked at me then, and were so cruel looking I froze for a second. No. he stated with venom in his voice. Then youre still married. I assumed aloud. Great, add adultery to my list of crimes Ill be serving my sentence in Hell for. No. he gritted his teeth, closing his eyes.

Edward I asked very carefully, keeping my voice understanding and loving, Did she pass away? Bella., his body jerked to attention and his voice pleaded, its tone tortured and pained, as if hed cry at any moment again, Pleasecant we stop this? Please? No, Edward. I stood my ground, I want you to answer meplease. Why are you doing this to me? You cant fix me, Bella., his voice was strained and his eyes were wet with tears now, Its too late for me, cant you see that? Justreport things about my life now. Ill tell you every story I have about my job but please, please dont talk about her anymore. I beg you, Bella. Listen, I can tell you about Raven. There are some scary stories there. Why does it frighten you so much to talk about herTanya? I asked. Bella Edward stood up and hit the stop button on the recorder, Cant we talk about this tomorrowplease? And in seconds, he was kneeling down before me again, my legs parted as he leaned in closer, kissing my lips hard and his hands were taking my pen and notebook away, giving them a toss behind me. Please, Bella he kissed me again, his tongue curling in around mine, the taste of strawberry evident there, I dont want to argue with youpleasecant we just And he kissed me even harder and more passionately, cupping my face in his hands. Edward I mumbled against his mouth, Nodont Didnt we have enough therapy today? Edward asked sexily, and began to pull up my t-shirt, leaning my chair back a bit as he pulled the right cup of my bra down off my breast, licking wetly against my lonely little nipple. I let out a high pitched moan and instantly I was wet between my legs. No, Edwardnocome on I began to breathe out my arguments, wanting to go back to what we were talking about but he was ignoring me, pulling the left cup of my bra off my breast, taking a thick bite. Edward I moaned as his tongue lapped at the hem of my jeans below my belly button. At this, I let out a strangled cry of lust. Enjoy my body, Bella, please he almost begged as he undid my jeans, unzipping them, Leave my mind alone. I was about to reply but then he drowned my words with his mouth, and in moments he was picking me up into his arms, and I felt myself laying on something hard. Opening my eyes, I saw I was sprawled out over the kitchen counter, this time, my head hanging off and facing my yellow stove. My t-shirt was up around my throat and I felt my jeans down around my ankles again, the panties, too. I couldnt even see him anymore but I felt him right away, his tongue moving expertly left and right over my clit, God, the heat and wetness of his DAMN tongue drove all thoughts of therapy out of my head.

Edward I mumbled incoherently, OHHhhh GOD!! Thats my Bella., he spoke and his lips moved against my pussy lips and I almost screamed out loud again at that sensation, Just let me please you I soon came four times in a row before he even unzipped his pants, securing his condom, and taking me right there on the counter. EPOV Bella slept next to me in bed that night, and I held her, kissing her ear again as she began to drift off to sleep. I had tired her out with todays games and poor little Dr. Bella just couldnt think clearly enough to ask me one more question. I felt like a piece of shit, doing that to her. But I didnt want her to know my past, my sad little stories. She would only pity me more and I didnt want any pity from anyone, especially her. Bella paid a lot of money so that I could give her two weeks of pleasure. And the more she asks about my life, the more sorrow I see in her deep, dark eyes and the more I feel like some insect in a vial. I wanted to enjoy my short time with the fair Bella, knowing once its over we will never cross paths again. Is it too much to ask that I just have this time with her, uncomplicated with the horrors of my world, so I can remember it always? Someone like Bella will never happen to me again in my lifetime. I dont want her to look back on us and feel sad for me. I want her to remember my smile, the laugh that I hadnt laughed in years, and the perfect way our bodies connect. I want to keep feeling youngand freeand alive. I can actually feel that when Im with her. Please, God, just for ten more daysbut here I am praying again to no one. I wish that Bella could love me, that would be one wish Id ask of the Genie. My first wish would be to erase all the pain and loss my baby had gone through. My money had restored her face and some of her internal organs but she was far from healed. Skin grafts, cosmetic surgery, constant surgeries as she grows oldermedication for her painwill cost dearlyfor years and years to come. I can never leave Fire. I can never have Bella for my own. I can never stop whoring. Wishes dont come true by rubbing on fucking lamps.

EPOV I smiled, snuggled up in pink Tinkerbell sheets next to my little angel. We laid side by side in bed, watching the last episode of SpongeBob and I couldnt help but laugh at Squidward. My baby always said that was me, because my name was Edward. He was crabby and always trying to ruin SpongeBobs fun but he was very hysterical to me, always pissed off. I didnt hear the little tingle of Katies giggle and my head turned towards hers. The perfect round eyes were closed, adorned with her lovely long eyelashes and her mouth was puckered up in a little pout. In her sleep, her bottom lip sucked the top one a bit and I nearly laughed out loud at the beauty I was fortunate enough to behold so close to me.

I dared to lean in one inch and touch my unworthy lips to her rosy cheek; my nose tickled by the long red locks of her soft, smooth hair as it fell and laid upon her little shoulders. This is the love of my lifeand I knew it without question. I just laid there at her side, eyes closed, thanking God for letting something so pure and beautiful rest beside something as flawed as myself. As SpongeBob ended, I carefully moved myself out of her bed and sat up on its edge, switching off the TV, putting down the remote, and covering her up to her chin with her blankets and comforter that was also adorned by the sassy Tinkerbell. I inhaled and smiled at the sweet scent of strawberry bubble bath, remembering our bathtub fight earlier. She had won. After the bath, I was easily more wet than she was. She is a master splasher. I peeked inside the blankets and saw she already had a good hold of her giraffe doll, Pirate, her favorite since she was born. His name was pirate because she lost one of his eyes once so I put a black eye patch there and Katie loved it. And thus, his name was born. He had more stains and sewing marks than a world war veteran but she loved him best. I had learned to sew on this doll, performing miracles every time she brought him to me in tears. It made me feel like Pirate, being torn and ragged, but having her complete, thick love anyway. Daddy? her tired little voice whimpered. Yea, baby? I whispered, kneeling down beside her bed. Can I have an ice cream sandwich? she almost said in her sleep, her eyes half closed as I laughed softly above her. No, Katie, not right now. I smiled down at her, Its time for bed. Nnnooo., she whined a little, her eyes getting heavier. Oh, yes. I tilted my head, adoring her as usual, Maybe if youre good Ill sneak it to you during breakfast tomorrow. Okay? I cant deny her anything. Im spoiling her rotten. Okay., she smiled, happy, and my whole world was right again. Goodnight, Duckie Lips. I said, using my nickname for her. When she sleeps, her lips stick out like a ducks bill. So cuteso perfect. Goodnight, Daddywuv you, she said so faintly as sleep finally curled her arms around my baby. I love you. I responded, kissing her perfect mouth with a small peck, tasting grape juice, smiling to myself and licking my mouth, trying to dilute the flavor a bit. Note to self: Make sure Katie brushes her teeth real good tomorrow. The nightlight was on already and I used its light to find my way out of her small room into the living room.

It flickered for a second and I stepped backwards, looking at it. It did it again and I almost considered pulling it from the outlet. If Katie woke up in the middle of the night and in the dark, shed scream and cry. I shoved it back in, all the way in, and it remained steady and unblinking now. Good. I went back out to the living room to prepare things for tomorrow. After an hour or two had gone by, I was done with the dishes and all the laundry was put away. Katies outfit for nursery school tomorrow was all picked out and waiting on its hanger on her doorknob and after finding nothing on TV to watch, I decided to make her lunch. It was finally at 11:32 pm that my wifes footsteps were coming up the stairs. I tensed and exhaled a breath, preparing for another battle. I tried to stay out of her way and she tried to stay out of mine most of the time, but I was already pissed off. Shes never here. She said shed be home for dinner tonight. My own feelings aside, maybe Katie might like to have a mother around. I never didand now she never does either. I hated that. But Tanyas dreams and art must come first. Pullleeasse. The key turned in the lock and she walked in, looking exhausted, her red hair swept up into a pretty bun, and she took her winter coat off, exposing her nice black dress. I glanced at her up and down, seeing the nice black pumps completing her outfit. I hate the way she looks all the time, fancy little dresses too short, the black stockings, the high heelsshe should be in t-shirts and jeans, casual and light, someone Katie could get down on the floor and play blocks with. My mother was always dressed up all the time, too pretty to hug and mess up. Too perfect to be touched. No, Edward, dont kiss Mommy, youll mess up her lipstick. Go play over there. Hi. She looked at me and tossed her coat on the sofa, going to the refrigerator, not even coming near me for a hug or a kiss, but this was normal now. Something inside me sighed that she just threw her coat on the couch. I just cleaned in there. Doesnt she know how to use a hanger? What a housewife Im turning into. Hi. I gave no happy tone to my voice as I spread peanut butter onto the bread below me. She took a tall glass and poured milk into it for herself, leaving very little in the one gallon there. Hey, Tanya, I frowned, Can you save some milk for Katies breakfast tomorrow, please? I have to get more tomorrow. God, I cant even have a glass of milk when I get home from work now! she slammed the fridge door closed hard. Anything I say anymore just fills her with rage in two seconds. Maybe its the lack of sex. I know thats one of my big problems lately. The other day, I was watching the Little Mermaid with Katie and I got hard watching Ariels body. I need to get laidbad. My own hand is even getting bored with me these days. I can almost hear it whining, AGAIN? every time I lay in my bed alone.

You can. I kept my eyes on the jelly I was now spreading, Just a small glass, this one time, and getting home from work? Is that what youre calling it? Its after 11. Maybe your daughter would like to say goodnight to you once in awhile, if its not too much trouble for you. HEY, I work! she spun around to me, slamming her glass on the counter, I work my ass OFF everyday! And youre here! So if we are low on milk, BUY some! Or should I shop, too, on my way home? I work too! I spun towards her, my eyes burning, I am raising our daughter alone while you snap pictures all day! Then, at night, you go to these fucking parties doing God knows what. Heres an idea! Take a picture of US to keep on you so that one day you dont walk in here and fail to recognize us! You prick! she shouted back, tears in her eyes, I am making contacts! I am showing my work so maybe I can get published! Then maybe we could AFFORD two gallons of milk at once! Maybe you should forget getting published and get a real job in an office somewhere! I shot back, putting the sandwich together. I wanted to get a job, a real job. I loved taking care of Katie and spending all my time with her but I felt like less than a man, having my wife working all the time, and me being home ironing and cooking. But we had made that deal a long time ago. And three years later, it still wasnt working. Fuck YOU! she screamed, letting the tears fall. Typical. Cry. A womans dirtiest trick during an argument. I went to college for this, I am going to be a photographer, Edward! she yelled at my back, At least I have a degree, what do you have? A child who knows what I look like! I threw down the butter knife and towered over her, completely enraged now. That was a low blow on her part. She knows why I couldnt finish college. And its because of her! I stuck my knife just as deeply into her heart by using Katieand I hated myself for that. But I wanted Katie to have both of us. I dont want her lonely and feeling uncared for. I was loving her for both of us and it wasnt enough. Katie wants her Mommy and damn it, I want her to have that, too. Not to mention, I want my wife. I hate you! she cried, sobbing and going into the living room. This wasnt the first time Tanya shouted this phrase at me. Later, shed always say she didnt mean it. But it was getting harder and harder to believe her. Good, I seethed, watching her sit on the sofa, Its nice to know you can feel something! I was so tense and filled with spite that I kept listening to her cry as I packed up Katies lunch, with a chocolate cupcake and a juice box to complete it. I wrote Katies name on the brown lunch bag and put little hearts and stars on each side of it. I was happy to be able to show my love to someone. Tanya is never here just like my god damned parents.

I wish we werent like this. But I have no idea how to fix it. I wish I could hold her and kiss her and make love to her like we used to. But she has become Esme to me. Too busy, too void when shes here, invisible when shes not. I wish I could be more supportive and caringand not so angry all the time. I wish we were a family. After a good ten minutes, Tanya stomped back into the kitchen, tears and makeup under her eyes. She was holding an envelope that had the words Kaitlyn Cullen Trip on it. What is this? she asked me. Maybe you forgot, because you dont work in a real office, I kept being a giant prick to her, not sure why, speaking slowly, But thats called an envelope. It holds things. Whats in it? she scowled at me, Money? I sighed, putting the bread away, Katies school is going on a trip tomorrow to a museum. All the kids are going. How much? she asked, smirking at me. Twenty seven dollars. I said, readying myself for her outburst. And you just wrote the check without a care in the world., she pretended to smile, The rent is late, the gas bill needs to be paid. We dont have any extra money for this stuff, Edward. Im not telling her she cant go. I dried my hands, She gets so little and she never asks for much. So, yea, I wrote the check. Its my account, too. But its my money., she informed coldly. Now I was pissed. Oh, Im sorry, I thought it was our money., I sneered, But I guess youre right. Why let your daughter have a little joy out of your money? Why dont you go buy another dress from Hookers R Us for the next party youre going to. You must get PUBLISHED, if thats what theyre calling that now. Are you accusing me of cheating on you?! she squinted, appalled. Well, look over yourself in the full length mirror. I let my own eyes rake over her accusingly, You dont really believe youre invited to these things for your award winning shots of birds and trees, do you? She cried again and turned her back to me, her hands shaking and covering her eyes. I had to get out of there now, before I said any moreI was hurting her and I knew it. I need to go cool off for awhile. I was furiously shoving my hands into my jacket, ready to move towards the door. I did this a lot during a particularly bad argument and would come back later, after she had fallen asleep. I cant take this anymore, Edward. She was sobbing, I love you but I hate you! Youre so evil to me all the time! What did I ever do to you that you hate me so much?!

I dont hate you. I said in a low voice, feeling lower than dirt now, my hand on the doorknob. She sobbed again and I felt myself moving up behind her, trying to put my arms around her. But she moved away from me, crying a little less loudly now. I want a divorce., she breathed, sobbing a little more now after she said this. And my whole world imploded right then. Tanya I felt like I could hardly breathe, Noyou cantwhat about Katie? Ill take her. She said, still not looking at me. Where? I was more scared now. As much as it hurt to consider life without Tanya, there was no way I could be denied Katie. She is my whole world. Shes my air. Ill find a place of my own., she shrugged. She had not thought any of this through at all. You cant afford that, and youre gone all the time. I pointed out, Youre not having some teenage babysitter watch Katie all day, either. Im all she has, Tanya. Youre not doing that to us. Fine, forget it., she said with an icy voice, not looking at me, No divorce. Ill stay, alright? Happy now? She had never said divorce before. And even though she said forget it, I was still hurt and upset. She doesnt love me anymore. She hates me. If she could afford it, shed already be gone, with my daughter. And, even though I knew it sounded wrong of me, I was so angry that after my years of waiting for her to finish college, my homeless nights asleep freezing in cemeteries, the days when I couldnt find anything to eat while my insides growled in anguish, the times I ate half eaten things out of garbage cans, that she found life with me here so unbearable, so hard. I had endured Hell for her, but now, because we were having a little trouble, she was so ready to bail out on me. Thanks very much. I frowned, sarcasm oozing out of my voice, You make it sound like Im some ogre that has you locked in a cage! Im going out. I was back at the door again, yanking it open, ready to exit this battle. Tanya put the envelope on the little round dining room table in the corner and she said, almost whispering, When your parents told you to choose between them and me, and you chose me, I was so happy at first. And then they made you pay everyday for going with me, and you took it alland I was so sad for you. But I told myself I would make you glad you picked me. I would work and make my dreams come true and then I would help you get back to schooland maybe you could become a doctor someday, like you always wanted. When we got married, I was determined to make that happen for us. I wanted to make it right. And I kept telling myself, we stayed together, we beat Carlisle and Esme, we showed them. But nowI look at us and see that they beat us. They knew what they were doing when they cut you off. They destroyed us in that minute.

We just didnt know it yet. And we are together and have a beautiful little girlbut were not happy. Were not in love. They won. They killed us. This is not about my parents. I gritted my teeth, hating what she was saying but knowing it was true, every word of it, And I asked you not to talk about them, Tanya. You know its true. They tore us apart., she looked at me and the loneliness and sorrow reflected off my own eyes that wore the same glaze themselves. Maybe they were right. I said, rejected and hurting, You dont belong with me. She deserves better than me is what I was thinking, but as I slammed the door and was rushing down the stairs, I could hear Tanya crying and realized what my words sounded like to her. That she wasnt good enough for me. Shit! I almost went back up. I stopped on the 6th floor steps and almost went up the 3 flights to apologize and hold her and kiss her tears away. Maybe I could get a night job and help more. We could try marriage counseling, like she wanted. But I didnt. I kept going down stairs until I was out and getting into our silver Volvo, I peeled away, needing to drive fast and clear my head. Needing to cry alone at the terror her threat of divorce had inspired in me, and to imagine me telling our 3 year old daughter that she was moving away from me was just too much to bear. I told myself I would explain what I meant by last words and to talk to Tanya tomorrow when she woke up. That I shouldnt have said those cruel things to her, and that I was so sorry. That I dont want a divorce and I loved her. I would say it all, to make her give me another chance. But sometimes you dont get a tomorrow. Sometimes, when you speak words to someonethose fast become your last words to them. I had a moment where I couldve turned back to make things right with Tanya, and I had carelessly thrown it away, foolishly thinking I had a lifetime to talk to her. I was wrong. And I would regret my actions of leavingand my last words to herfor the rest of my lifeevery single day of my life. My time was up. That was the last time I saw Tanya. Edward a voice whispered and I jumped. BellaI was holding her but I could not fall asleep. I kept playing my last night with Tanya in my head, over and over again. I am sick. I want to burn myself. I havent wanted to do that for years. No, not here. If Bella saw that or heard itshed throw me right out of here, knowing what a fucking head case I am. She could have me committed. She should. But then I cant earn. So that was out. I havent felt any pain for five days now. Thats whats wrong with me. Bella is far too kind to me and my body isnt used to that. It wants punishment again. Its almostcraving it. Two weeks is so not long enough for Bella to see how mental I truly am. She, by nature, is a healer, someone who wants to fix and correct all that is wrong and bad. That is her sensitive, loving heart and I know thats why she

chose me. I am her new broken toy. I am damaged. If I werent, I wouldnt be here, sitting on her shelf, waiting for her to cure me. Victoria had seen me burn myself once after I had dreamt of Tanya. Any time I thought of that night, of the pain I had caused her and my Katie, the pain was too unreal to handle. I began to find that burning myself, as they were burned, brought me punishment and pain and justice. It made me feelslightly betterenough so that I could almost breathe again. It would not heal menothing would. I would have just preferred to die, but I didnt have that luxurious option. Katie needs meor my money, anyway, and I couldnt let her down. So I went one night, leaving Victorias bed, in the dead of night, and went to her kitchen while she slept. Turning the dial on her stove, the blue gas flames erupted with a tiny whoosh and I turned it to a medium flame. I decided to burn my palm, because, whod care about my palm or even notice it at Fire? I couldnt scar my body if I could help it, Victoria would skin me alive. So, in complete silence, I let my palm hover over the tiny flame tongues. They bit fast and I clenched my eyes tight, bracing my jawtaking it as my body quivered hard, but I didnt screamor move awayor cry. After what seemed like forever, I couldnt bear anymore and yanked my hand away, turning off the gas with the other. Turning, I went to the sink and turned the cold water on full blast over the angry, ugly burn in my flesh and felt a new kind of pain. My body jerked and my head bucked back for a second as I endured it, only a tiny growl managing to escape from behind my clenched teeth. Victoria was behind me a second later, holding me, kissing my shoulder blades and informing me that she admired my strength and that it had aroused her, seeing me do this to myself. And also, that she had a whole new client list to introduce me to now. She told me I would make a wonderful pain slave. And the next day she would begin preparing me for those very high paying customers. The next morning, at dawn, I was shown to Victorias dungeon, buried deep below Fire. And I began to learn about pain. I never resisted or struggled against any of it. It almost comforted me, suffering for my crimesscreaming and being punished for abandoning the people I loved. I accepted every single thing she could do to me. Edward Bellas voice called again and I tilted my head, gazing down at her, my eyes slave to her beauty while she slept so deeply. My fingers moved over her eyebrows, over the details of her cute little nose, and traced adoringly around her lips. Yes, Bella? I whispered. The last time shed spoken in her sleep we had a sexy little conversationand I liked it. There were no hard questions hereno dirty, evil confessions to makeno looking into her eyes when she learned how disgusting I really was. In sleep, I could speak to her hearther soul. Her mind, brilliant as it was, was now restingso it did not intrude here. She struggled slightly in the blanket, as if something was bothering her. My brow creased, wondering what was wrong.

Give me your handEdwardpleasereach out she was softly whimpering, I just want to help younono. Shhhh, my sweet little heart I whispered into her ear, kissing it and wrapping my arms fully around her, Im hereIm fineyou have me. She wants to save me so badly. I wish I was saveable. She calmed a bit and sighed in a relaxed little moment. Her lips gave a hint of a smile as I closed my eyes and leaned my cheek against her bare shoulder, addicted to the tender soft skin there. You have me, Bella. I whispered, Always. I love you. Hearing my own words made me ache inside. I couldnt deny to myself that it was true but I also knew I could never tell her this and that she could never love me in return. And even if she did, we could never be. Love is an evil bitch. Worse than Victoria, Raven, and all the rest of them put together. I hate love. It whips me everyday and its chains are hot and sharp. And its painI never get used toI cant endure. And now its after Bellait wants to hurt and slash her pure, unscarred body and heart now, using me. Even now, while Im holding Bella, my mind wanders to tomorrow. I have a part in that adult film in the afternoon and then Fire afterwards. I wonder if Bella still wants to go there tonight to observe me. No, I cant ask her to do that. But she did say she wanted to see what jobs I do. This job, at least, shed be allowed to come to, and sit behind the cameras, as my guest. I decided to tell her about it and let her choose. I guess it would make an interesting chapter in her report. How often does a girl like Bella get to see behind the scenes of a porno? Let her come. She will see me for what I am and get out of this ugliness. And she wont fall for me any deeper. She will save herself and get out. My face cringed, hating the thought of asking her to go. I would have to act clueless from now on, not show her that I could see the sadness shining in her eyes. I was only that guy a couple days ago that asked her right at the table of the Chinese restaurant if she ever sucked cock before. It was so easy then, and I felt no shame at all in what I was. Now, mere days later, I feel sorepulsive. Carefully, I got out of bed and kissed Bellas hair, smoothing it and waiting to make sure she wasnt waking up. Good, she was still very deep asleep. I walked naked to the living room and sat on the sofa, staring at the little recorder; the red record button holding all my attention. It was so dark here, and only the light of the moon shed its light inside. And Bella wasnt watching me. I hit the record button and closed my eyes, making my voice talk. Edward session five. I began professionally, as she liked to, Bellathis is me. Hopefully, you wont hear this until after Ive gonesoI can say anything I want to say

EPOV

Today is Friday, Day 5. I was singing in the kitchen the next morning at 7:30 am, making our breakfast when Bella began to stir in bed. Laying everything out on our tablecloth on the floor, I peeked in the bedroom. Stretching and smiling, her eyes still closed, she was so natural and lovely I couldve laid next to her forever. I was wearing my jeans and no shirt and hoped this was still the rule for me during the day. Sleep well? I knelt by the bed and softly rubbed my nose against her tiny elflike one. Mmmmm she sounded so content as her eyes opened droopily and looked into mine with so much warmth I almost began to sweat, Too good. I wonder whyMr. Evasion. I laughed for a second then made my eyes and voice turn very serious. Bella. I said, stroking her hair as she kept gazing at me, I want to say that I am so sorry that I did what I did last night. Im cheating on our deal and I know youre becoming frustrated and sadbecause of me. No, I she began, but I wouldnt let her deny it. Please, Bella I said, looking at her hand and taking it in mine, Please let me say this. Ive been thinking about it all night. Alright., she tensed, waiting. This is a really tense arrangement weve set up for ourselves. Therapy by day, sexual adventure by night. Its my fault. I went on, hoping my voice came through as gentle and sincere, I am not a good patient, I know that. And I never thought Id say these words but Im not easy. We both laughed at that for a couple seconds. But I thank youfor wanting to help me, Bella. Ive always wanted someone to care and when she finally shows up, I get scared and angry and I pull away like a little kid, and Im sorry, Bella. I dont know whats wrong with me. But I dont want to hurt you anymore. I should go. Her eyes flickered in understanding and they wounded me with their fear and hurt. NO! she shouted, grabbing my arm, No, Edward! Our times not upyou promised! Of course, Ill return your money to you, all of it. I felt queasy inside, doing this. Victoria would skin me alive but it would be better than robbing Bella of her inheritance. These last four days have been so magical to me, how could I charge her for them? I think I owe her money at this point, for putting up with me. Edward, no, wait., she sat up, as she held me by the arms, I dont want you to goplease. Stay with me. I know, its my fault, I push too hard, I want too much. And youre not ready to open up to me yet. I should be more patient. Im sorry, Edward.

Dont apologize, Bella. I leaned my head to hers, then kissed it, I love how you keep trying, how you never give up. I know its because you care that you push. Im just not used to these feelings. I dont know how to react. I dont know howtobe cared for. And I can see that Im hurting you. AndI dont want to do thatever. Bella frowned and decided to claw in and fight back and it floored me. She got up to her knees in the bed, letting the covers fall and she faced me down, naked, her voice strict now. No, you are not leaving., she stated , like a fact, You belong to me and I rule, remember? You are staying here if I have to chain your ass to the bed, you got that, Cullen? If this is how you feel more comfortable, if this is how youd like me to talk to you, then tough shit! I wont treat you that way but our deal still stands. You will suffer a new kind of torture now, learning how to be cared for! That is my fetish and you will feed it until its sated! You are mine and you will not leave until our time is up. Good or bad, we talk it out and stick together. Wow. She is going to be either a great psychiatrist somedayor a dominatrix. I didnt want to go. It made me sick to even think of leaving her. But I wanted her to have the option. I liked the way she spoke to me just now, its like, she was speaking my language there for a minute. I would have to stay now. She had said the words to hold me here. She is super intelligent. And I was glad. So I smiled and saw her smile coming back to me in return. Yes, Bella. I replied, If that is your pleasure. It is., she smirked. She let out a breath of huge relief at this, and I was happy when she pulled me to her for a very tight embrace. Her fingers curled into my hair as I closed my eyes and resigned myself to the fact that if I could learn to be burned and whipped and stuck with needles, then maybe I could learn this new game of Bellas. As a toy, it was my duty to play the games she liked best. I would try. Later, we sat on the floor together, eating Lucky Charms cereal and watching cartoons. The mood was so fun and light, and Im not sure how it got that way. Last night I was so confused, so full of conflict and shameand now I didnt seem to have a care in the worldfor the moment anyway. I know I was bad last night. I was saying to her with a boyish grin on my lips, I shouldve answered your questions. Im sorry. You are pretty wicked., she smiled back at me, chewing her cereal, Its also my fault, so I cant be too mad at you. I am so weak for you. Its sickening. I am supposed to be detached and professional, but you are just too fucking beautiful and are so much more, behind that face and body I dont have the strengthto stay away from you. I took the pink heart out of my bowl of cereal, a marshmallow, and put it into her mouth to chew up and devour. She could have my heart. She did have it. Thendont. I leaned over and kissed her sugary lips. After a silent minute, I asked her, not wanting to prolong the inevitable mention of real life waiting outside the door, Sowhat is your schedule for today, Dr.?

Mmmm., she smiled, Observing my patientevery lovely inch of him, in all his eternal glory. I raised a brow, without words and she clarified, We have today, Monday and Tuesday off to observe days in the lives of our patients. Oh, I see. I let a big smile curl up at the corner of my lips, Well, then, todayis going to be very weird and strange for you, Dr. Bella. Why? she looked nervous but still smiled anyway. Because today I kept my voice fun and uncomplicated, We get to shoot a littleporn. Porn?! her voice was loud and harsh suddenly. Yea. I squinted a little at her reaction, I was offered a part in this moviefriends of Victoriasif you forbid me to do it, Ill cancel. Maybe Emmett can take it. AlthoughI will be punished by Victoria if I dont do it. Normally, I wouldnt tell her that last little bit, but she wants honesty. Punished how? she tried to look calm but it seemed like she really wanted to know. Not sure. I answered honestly, She likes lots of differentplay. Bella swallowed and I saw her eyes processing thoughts quickly. Why am I doing this to her? A big part of me wants her to say no, dont go. Another part of me wants her to come with me and hang out and kiss me in between takes. And then another part of me wants her to want to vomit and run out of there, leaving me behind her forever. God, how many personalities do I have in here? Ill go with you, Edward., she said firmly, then made herself smile, Itll be goodfor my paper. I thought that, too. Bring your notebook., I said, finishing my cereal and drinking the sweet milk out of the bowl, sipping it out like a cup, But if at any time, it gets to be too much, you dont have to stay. What are they going todo to you? she asked carefully, her brave face on. Its a pain video. I informed, trying to sound casual about it, It wont be that terrible. It could be worse. Its basically, a female dom and me. I am the poor little sub male wholl be at the mercy of the wicked woman. Im used to all the things theyve got planned, but this is probably the only way youd get to see me experience it. Are you sure this is something you want to see, Bella? You dont have to come, Ill be back in a couple of hours. No, Edward., she said, finishing her cereal now, I told you, youre not pushing me away. I will go wherever you go. Ill be there for you. I can handle it. I couldnt do anything except lean in and give her the most passionate kiss I think I ever shared with her. She even made a little noise, surprised by its intensity as I let my cereal bowl hit the floor and curled my arms around her. Its not so much what shed said but the way she had said the words. So true, so conceretely sure, I truly believed them. She was with me. She wouldnt leave me and she wouldnt let me leave her. She is a lot stronger than she looks upon first glance.

After a few minutes of wet, hot necking, I got a thought and chuckled into her ear, Just promise me one thing. Dont dive on the dominatrix to save me this time, alright? She could have you chained up right beside me. Bella laughed and said, I promise. Ill sit there and watch you suffer and think, serves you right after you distracted me last night with sex. Good girl. I kissed her chin, then stood up and lifted her over my shoulder as she screamed, surprised by the sudden raise off the floor, Shower time. You need a nice, hard scrubbing after last night, you dirty little thing.

BPOV I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. I cant do this. I wondered if Edward really meant to leave this morning, or if that was his way of making me behave and treading more carefully next time we have a therapy session. James had said Edward was a master manipulator and I was starting to wonder if that was true or not. Edward must know how much I care about him and maybe he is using that to his advantage, saying hed leave so I would beg him to stay. But I didnt really beg. It occurred to me that he was out of his element with me, because theres no one ordering him around and maybe his mind was missing that. He was feeling insecure and out of control without that. So for a moment I became ruler. I ordered him to stay and he listened. That is just too much power for anyone to have over another. Only someone as sweet and trusting and giving as Edward could put his entire self into the hands of others as he has done. Should I be trying to destroy that about him, when that is also what draws me closer to him? I would have to sit down soon and listen over my tapes and start writing some of my conclusions and suspicions about him while he wasnt around. Maybe I could have him take a walk or run some errand. But what I suspected is clear: Something horrible happened to Tanya. I fear she is dead. Also, I think he has a child or children somewhere. The Sponge Bob cartoons, the child-like behavior in him at times pointed to it. That would really explain why he feels he is trapped in this life and can never lose his job, as he put it. And I think that at one point Edward took this child to his parents, despite the way they treated him, in a desperate moment, and they cold heartedly shut the door in his face. I made a mental note to ask my dad to locate them. Maybe some peace could be worked out between them. Theres always two sides to every story, right? Maybe Edward could call them, if a face to face is too difficult. I didnt look forward to the reaction Id get when I brought this up to Edward. But I think this way I could get more of the story and at the same time, Edward could start to heal if he lost some of that hatred he has deep inside for them. Im not saying he should forgive them. Im saying he should let go of the anger he has because of them.

I had my notebook with me and a pen as Edward and I caught a cab to a place called Eagle Studios. For some reason, I almost thought that wed be going to a hotel room or some house, but it seemed this movie was more high budget than that. It was no Dreamworks production, but it was not on the bottom rung I was guessing. Maybe it would be okay. Yea, okay, Bella, tell yourself that. You dope. Theyre planning on hurting Edward. Again. What part of that is okay? At one point Edward tried to rub his fingers over my jeans between my legs right in the back of the taxi with the driver right in front of us, but I was proud to have stopped him, despite the quick thrill it had given me. I was trying to be professional at the moment and steel myself to accept this next couple hours. Maybe he was trying to take my mind off things, but I told myself I have to be stronger than Ive been. I will not be able to resist Edward or stop him from seducing me, but I could try to limit it so it only happened on his time, not mine. Oh, please, who am I kidding? I want him right now and its 11:23am! God, Im weak. Dont forget, Bella. Edward took my hand and squeezed it lightly, Everything you see is an act. If I scream or anything, dont get upset. Its acting. All of it. Youll see between takes. Alright? Alright. I nodded as the cab slowed and stopped in front of an office building. Thanks. Edward paid the cab driver and the driver said a very enthusiastic, Woah!! Thanks, MAN! And then he even jumped out of the cab and opened my door for me, taking my hand and helping me out. Edward must have tipped him well. Edward thought that was funny and shook the drivers hand as he exited. He wore a t-shirt and jeans, too, and didnt look dressed up at all as we went into this large, tall building. It looked so new and beautiful and that surprised me too. I dont know why I always envisioned flea bag motels and empty, dirty warehouses when I thought of shooting a porn film. Lots of surprises. I followed Edward and he went up to an elevator, pressing 10. He still held my hand and winked at me as we waited for it. I wondered if I looked as scared as I felt. The silver doors opened and a couple people exited the elevator car. We went in and were the only people inside as Edward pressed 10 and the doors closed. Stay! I pointed to the right corner at him as I went to my corner of the elevator,Edward, behave. But Bellaelevators! Edward kept trying to get close to me, Theyre made for fucking! He was kissing my neck and then licked it as the doors opened. I darted out and he chased me, running like a kid down this long marble floored hallway. It was very quiet and posh looking here and I saw a receptionist sitting at a desk. I quieted my voice but he didnt. I felt like we should be good and reserved all of a sudden. Then I remembered what we were doing here. I wonder how one introduces himself to the receptionist in this place. Oh, hi, Im Spunk Ransom, and Im shooting Big Dicks Throbbing here today. Jesus.

I decided to hang back and let Edward take this. Giving me a slap on the ass, Edward felt no shame in front of the beautiful girl at the desk. She buried me. Ten times over. Her skin was ivory white, flawless, and her ebony hair was pulled straight back in a tight long braid. It looked like silk. Her makeup was heavy around the eyes but expertly done and her lips sparkled with a coral shine. Her dress suit was low cut and her breasts were very large and half exposed from our view standing above her. I almost stared at them myself, then had to make myself look away at the flowers on the desk instead. Are those mums? Edward hardly even noticed her and leaned his arms on the glossy wooden counter between them, saying, Hi. Edward 7589. I smirked at this. Very clever. Code numbers. No last names. These guys obviously had been doing this for years and knew how to do this in a classy, legal way. But how did I know this yet, I just got here? If Charlie knew where I am right nowChrist! Hed lock me in a chastity belt and never let me leave my room again. She looked at a couple cards and smiled up at him. Yes, Edward, she greeted, Youre in room 45. Down the hall and last door on the left. Thank you., he smiled back, taking my hand and leading me. I guess its okay for me not to have a code number. Edward held me close, his arm around my waist and whispered, Last chance to change your mind, Bella. You dont have to come with me. I want to. I lied, And Edward I stopped and saw we were nearly at the right door. He looked at me, curiously, as if he didnt know what I would say or doneither did I. I wanted to tell him that I love him, that I hated seeing him go through any pain, even fake pain, and that if I could, I would give him everything I had and that hed never have to do this shit again. For the first time in my life, I wished I was rich. Yea? he finally asked when I was just staring at him, saying nothing. And I just held him. Holding him like I did the other night, closing my eyes and not wanting him to go in there. But I cant stop him. Besides, if Victoria ever hurt him because of something I made him do or not do, I could never forgive myself for that. Oh, Bella, he sounded touched by my feelings for him, and he stroked my hair in back, DontI told you its all an act. Dont be sad. Have fun. This is all in fun. Alright? Alright. I tried to smile as he kissed me briefly and opened the door. In this room, I was relieved to see three big leather sofas, a refrigerator in the corner, and a large bed in the other corner.

This is a room to relax in, between takes, or after the shoot. Anything you want to drink is in the fridge, just help yourself, and, Edward began explaining to me and then I heard a mans voice call, Edward! Youre early! Hi George., he smiled graciously and shook the mans hand. This man was medium build, long, curly brown hair and a bit overweight. I assumed he was someone behind the scenes, Bella, this is George, hes our director today. George, this is Bella, my assistant. I smiled, not sure I was dressed right or knew what an assistant of Edwards would look like, but George didnt look surprised so I went with it. I saw a banner on the wall over one of the sofas and it was black with red scrawled writing going across it, that said Men in Well, youre a tad early, but if you like, makeup awaits. George led us down another hallway past the sofas and there was a piece of paper taped to the door that said Hair and Makeup, written in black marker. Alright, cool. Edward said as we followed him. And to begin, no costume, nude. George said to Edward as nonchalantly as someone like me would order a hamburger. Edward grinned and commented to George, Going right for it, huh? No build-up or anything? He seemed amused, not embarrassed at all. Not for this one. George rolled his eyes, You know how these women are. Yea. Edward laughed and led me by the hand into the makeup room. This is a large room with chairs and mirrors in front of them, but also, three showers in the back and sinks, along with towels on the towel bars and clean towels on the floor near this area. A woman was standing in there, talking on her cell phone. She looked nice, t-shirt and jeans, like me, her hair red and up in a ponytail, perfect makeup, and she wore white sneakers, not stiletto heels. She turned when we came in and smiled wide. Hanging up her phone without a word, she squealed, EDWARD! My BABY! And in seconds, they were hugging like old friends. I found myself smiling, too, but remembered he never listed her in his little circle of friends to me. Hi RED! he smiled back at her and kissed her on the cheek affectionately, They didnt tell me you were doing us today. Bella, this is Red. Edward introduced us politely, Red, Bella, my assistant. Take very good care of her today, alright? I will, I will. She smiled at me wider, Nice to meet you, hon. You, too. I grinned. What the hell am I doing here? Well, youre early, as usual. Red complimented as Edward shrugged, then she said to me, Hes a very good little boy, this one.

I could only blush and laugh weakly at that. Come have a seat. Red twirled the chair to Edward and he looked at me first. Bella, you can sit in the chair next to me if you want. Edward looked into my eyes to make sure I was still alright. Okay. I took the empty seat beside him and watched Edward sit down in his seat. Ill do your body after your face. Red informed him and she put a cloth over him, as if she was about to cut his hair, and snapped it behind his neck. And so, Red began to put foundation on Edwards face, matching it to his own skin tone, and applied it with a little wet sponge, asking him about Victoria. Shes fine., he answered without saying too much in front of me. I listened to them as Red told Edward that a woman named get this Nikki Sinn was the one whod be dominating him today. I watched Edwards reaction and he seemed to smile and roll his eyes. Then Red began to gel and fix Edwards hair. It looked amazingly sexy. In about a half hour, Edwards face was even more beautiful than before, if thats possible and then Red took the cloth off him and said, You make my job so easy, youre already so gorgeous all by yourself. Edward laughed and started taking off his shirt, careful not to smear his face. He was moving towards the towels on the floor near the showers and looked at me, maybe afraid that I would leave or not want to see this. I smiled at him, pretending to write in my notebook as he took off his jeans and underwear. Oh, wait. Im his assistant. I should be over there. I closed my notebook and rushed over, taking his clothes off the floor and folded them neatly, getting a little smile from Edward at watching me play my part. Red didnt pay much attention to Edwards body as she began to spray this little air gun thing over his back. I noticed, although it wasnt obviously spraying out like a hose would spray, but Edwards back did look more airbrushed, even and flawless as she sprayed the body make up onto his skin. Edward, when he was turned to me and getting his chest sprayed, even started joking and talking with me while I watched. After that, Edward was given a soft black terrycloth robe and we left that room. Next, we went to the set Edward said it helped him to hang around it before shooting so we went to the next room over. No one was here at the moment, the cameras were all in place and ready to go. I felt sick right away at the set. It was a dungeon that had a tiny cage, a wooden box, a ladder, (laying down and tilted slightly upward over another box), and a wall full of assorted whips, gags, dildos, chains, toys, and tools. There was a huge box of every different wrapped condom to be found there, too, and when I finally looked up and saw Edwards face, I nearly cried. He was wearing a frown of distaste and sadness and he wasnt trying to hide it.

Edward? I said softly, You dont have to do this, you know. Its your choice. Its not that. He made his eyes look over into mine, I dont want you to see this, Bella. I thought I could take it, you coming here with mebutthis isnt going to be fake, Bella. Its real. Theyre going to do things to methings you should never have to see. I guess its like you said, I was trying to use this to push you away. But I cant do it to you. Why dont you go home and Ill be there after Im done here? Come with me, then. I said, holding his hand, I know you dont want to be here, either, Edward. Please. Lets get out of here. Lets go outside where theres sun and grass, please Edward. It looked to me like he was considering it and my heart was full of hope. There will be trouble, Bella., he informed without emotion. Im not leaving without you. I said, touching his cheeks with my hands, If you stay and do this, I will be here and Ill watch every minute of it. I will stick with you no matter what they do to you. I wont abandon you. But if you want to go, then we can go. You have to choose. Do what YOU want to do An internal struggle was happening in him behind those delicate eyes of his and then he smiled at me, looking like a naughty child and said, Lets go. I couldnt believe this! It was like a miracle of magic! He took my hand and led me down the hall, past a few people that said nothing to us, and before I knew it, we were out in the hallway, closing door 45 behind us. I love you so much, Edward. Oooh, wait, this way! he snickered and yanked me down another hallway as I laughed and followed him into another room that said 39 on it. It was dark in here and I figured we were hiding from someone Edward recognized in the halls. I was just so relieved to be out of there I giggled and then I felt Edwards hand clasp over my mouth, holding me to him as a pair of footsteps went down the halland were gone. The lights went on and my mouth was released. Oooh, hospital scene. Edward said as my eyes focused on what did look like a real hospital room, along with all kinds of props, too. Medicines, cotton balls, play needles. Now were in my fantasy., he smiled, looking around, putting on the stethoscope, Come here, Bella. I was so glad to hear that he had fantasies of his own, this was my first time hearing about it. Coming over to him, I let him place the stethoscope down into my shirt a bit, over my heart as he listened. Does it really work? I asked a bit too loudly as he winced and covered my mouth again while I tried not to laugh. I guess my loud amplified voice wasnt all that kind on his ears. He nodded at me, grinning as he listened for a minute or so.

I whispered, What is it saying? He smiled more and chuckled but I already knew what my heart would be saying to him if he listened to it I love you I love you I love you Its beating very fast., he shared. Edward moved away from me for a second and went to the corner of the room, finding doctors scrubs. He took off his robe and put them on, a nice powder blue shade against his light skin. You, Miss Swan, are very sick. He tossed the robe to the floor and turned to me, locking the door. Edward, will you get in a lot of troublewith Victoria for this? I asked, concerned. Maybe we should go back. I dont want Edward getting hurt by her, either. But it seems no matter what he does, hes in trouble. Shhhh he put his hands on my shoulders and leaned me back onto the examining table, You are babbling incoherently. You are extremely disoriented. I laughed and began to complain but Edward took out a thermometer and stuck it in my mouth, saying, Dont talk for 2 minutes. Hold that under your tongue. Giving a little whimper, I held it there and felt him taking off my shirt. Miss Swan, dont be alarmed. He said, Im a doctor. You must be examined thoroughly. Next, he removed my bra and shoved me back on the table, moving down to my jeans, unbuttoning and unzipping them as my hands nervously clenched at my sides, and I felt my panties coming off next as I made another muffled noise. Please, Miss Swandont be difficult., the doctor said, I would hate to have to sedate you. I heard a couple of clicking sounds and when I looked down I saw him pulling out these stirrups from the sides of the table and they snapped into place at my sides. No! I tried to speak but Edward came over to my face and slipped the thermometer out of my mouth, looking at it as my eyes looked up at him in nervous orbs. Wow., his voice said with much concern, You are running a very high fever. Lay back, Miss Swan. You shouldnt even speak. I dont have a fever. I decided to talk back as he leaned down a bit, bringing up a hospital restraint cuff and placing my hand through it, securing it a bit tightly as I yelped out, adding, Hey! Shhhh Edward moved around to my other hand as the bound one struggled at my side, and in another moment, my left hand was cuffed also, Youre so ill you might hallucinate and harm yourself, Miss Swan. Be still. Ill help you. I am not ill! I argued, struggling my arms a little as he went into a drawer, taking out a little plastic ball with straps.

You must save your strength, he said calmly and squeezed my cheeks with his one hand. My mouth opened and the little red ball went inside, filling my entire mouth and keeping my lips slightly apart as he turned my head and fastened the strap closed behind my head, moving my hair out of it and stroking it down around my shoulders. I gave out little muffled screams as I struggled, so excited and wet as he strolled around to the foot of the table and spoke softly as he lifted my legs up into each stirrup. You need an intense internal examination., he informed, ignoring my incoherent sounds, And you may even need to be committed for a long time, under my care. Until I feel that youre fit enough to be released into the real world again, you will belong to me. So if I were you, I would cooperate and get well. I yanked at my restraints, arching my back as I attempted to escape. There was leather straps that coiled around my knees and fastened snugly to hold me in place and then he parted my legs wide and the stirrups clicked again, locking them. MMMM!!! I tried to scream a little more loudly, trying to raise my head up and then letting it fall back down to the table, my body bucking and writhing harder as he moved around over to my breasts, his hands groping them and stroking up and down as he spoke, still gentle and soft. Breast exams are very important, Miss Swan., he said with authority, his fingers pinching the nipples as I plead to him with muffled growls, You should even examine them yourself every day in the shower. Your breasts are very healthyand beautiful., he cooed as he smiled down at me and he bent over, licking and biting them, his soft lips closing and opening over as I kept pretending to be afraid and fighting back. My fists jerked and my feet kicked as much as they could as his hand moved down my stomach and found my clit, moving it in circles one way then the other as I whimpered uselessly. Miss Swan, youre far too ill to be fighting like that., Edward warned again, grabbing me by the hair and looking into my eyes, nose to nose with me, Stop it right now or Ill put you to sleep for three days. I stopped moving and looked up at his beautiful eyes. Do you want to behave now? he asked. I nodded, giving another little mewing noise as he bent over me and kissed my lips, even though I was gagged. Such a sweet, sick girl., he commented, walking down to the foot of the table, and added, And now youre mine. I looked down at him and he began to pull on a pair of latex gloves, snapping it as it got to his wrist. Perhaps after the vaginal examination, youd like an anal one? he teased, smirking at me. NO! I tried to speak thru the ball in my mouth, No, please!

Shhhh, alright then, behave during the vaginal then and Ill skip the anal. He informed. I quieted a lot and closed my eyes as I felt his fingers slide right inside me, the wetness making it so easy for him to enter. I moaned out loud and felt another fingerthen another.I arched my back up and growled as he slowly pulled them in and out of me. Thats right, Miss Swan he purred as he kept twirling and moving his fingers in deeper, curling and bending them, Trust your doctor to cure you. I know how to make you feel better After a blissful lifetime of this, after I had an orgasm once already, he brought his mouth to my pussy and began to lick and bite and suck, parting my lips with his fingers, lapping deeper. Screaming and screeching, my body was thrusting and thrashing in glorious agony from the sensations of his mouth and lips and tongue. I came again and then again after that and he didnt stop, cruelly diving in again when I couldnt stand anymore. At last he lowered his scrub pants and his marvelous erect cock was threatening me like a samurai sword. Now be a good little patient, Miss Swan., he said and penetrated me all the way in as I arched again and let out a garbled scream, trapped and spread and loving it as my doctor moved back and began to fuck me slowly.

BPOV An hour later, we were both sated and spent and I was proclaimed cured by Dr. Cullen. My clothes were back on and so was Edwards black robe. Trust me. Edward took my hand and kissed it, leading me, sneakingly, back into the hallway right outside room 45. There was a fire alarm lever there and he pulled it, a ringing bell sound and water pouring out of the sprinklers overhead showering down on us. Come on! he yanked me hard as I squealed from the cold water raining down on me and we entered room 45 again, sitting on the leather sofa. George, Red, and a few others came running out of the other rooms, shouting and trying to save the cameras from the water. A naked girl also came racing out of the makeup room, looking pissed off and very wet. Edward looked at George and asked, What is this? I dont know, man, Im sorry. George was holding a camera, a towel over it, Must be a fire in the building. Looks like its off for today. Ill have to re schedule this. Ill call Victoria and set you up. Sorry. I smiled and snickered as Edward looked at me, celebrating in his eyes, his hair dripping wet and his eyeliner a bit smudged. Another observation: Edward Cullen is brilliant.

13

BPOV Where are we going? Edward was still smiling at me as I led him to the 5th floor of my building, then to the door that went to the roof. It is a large, flat, square area, ledges surrounding us. Buildings, trees, and the rich blue skies encircled. My other office., I had him by the hand as I stepped out into the sunlight. Nice view., he commented, walking behind me, the cool breeze playing with his copper hair. Yea, I felt we needed some air and sunshine. I confessed, And I want to try something. I might be wrong, I am a student, but I had an idea that might make things.easier for you. Will you try it for me, Edward? His face looked so innocent to me again and he stood there, staring at me and said, I trust you completely Bella. You can try anything with me. Remember, theres no wrong for us. I hope he means that. I hope this isnt a mistake. Alright, sit down. I sat myself on the floor of the roof and crossed my legs, watching him do the same opposite me. Well, first, before we begin, I want to say that Im very proud of you, Edward. I said, hoping my voice didnt sound too condescending, It took a lot of courage for you to go against what you knew today and say no to that film. Im not sure if you did it only for my sake or for yours, too, and frankly, I dont want to know. Either way, it was great. You decided. And you did it in a way that doesnt get you in trouble with the big V. That was genius. The big V? Edward looked playful and laughed at that. Before I try my idea, I began, Is there anything that you want to talk about first? Anything bothering you? Well, I did want to ask if you still want to come to Fire tonight., he said, Like I said, you can bring your friends if you like and be my guests. Or, if youd rather not, thats alright, too. Do you want me to come? I made him choose again. Yes., he looked worried that maybe he chose wrong. But theres no right or wrong answer here. Then Ill come. I smiled, resisting the urge to reach for his hand, And I understand that at Fire, youre working. I wont hold anything you do there against you, so dont worry about that. I dont want to make you uncomfortable or anything. I know, Bella., he tilted his head and looked into my eyes. Thank you, Edward. I said, feeling the wind tugging at a lock of my hair. For what?

For not allowing me to watch that torture today. I looked down at my sneaker, I wouldve endured it for you, butit wouldve been so painful for me, to see them hurting you. He looked down at his legs and didnt say anything. And Ill bring my friends. I said to lighten the subject, Theyve been a little mad at me this week, hogging you all to myself and not telling them much. You dont tell them about us? he smiled at me, watching me shake my head, his eyes twinkling in the sun, Why not? Its not that Im ashamed of anything weve done, just the opposite. I said, But its ours. And I dont want to share it with anyone. I understand that., he responded. Yes I know., I answered, Which brings me to my idea. I unzipped my purse on the floor next to me and took out a couple of scarves, black in color. He just studied me as I grinned and, placing a kiss on his forehead first, I continued, speaking very softly and lovingly. You have a lot you dont want to share, because it hurts too muchI said, slowly placing the one scarf around his eyes and tying just a single knot behind his head, And you tend to be very tense and uncomfortable when my questions get too difficult. I notice you have trouble looking into my eyes when its time to answer a hard question. I thoughtmaybethis might help you a little. I took his hands, treating them as if they were made of glass, curling the scarf around his wrists in front of him as his head turned halfway, his face so achingly beautiful with the blindfold onmy captive angel. I lightly made one knot around his wrists, enough to make him feel secureloose enough to escape if he chose to. I finished, touching his leg with my caring hand. Im right here. I said warmly, Was I right? Do you feel more comfortable this way? More secure? His head bowed a little and his lips trembled a tiny bit. He bit down on his bottom lip and took a breath, answering me, Yes, Bella. Are you alright, Edward? I stroked his leg over the denim of his jeans. Yes, Im fine, Bella., he relaxed and I could see his body losing its tension with my naked eye. Dont forget, you can use the lo mein words, too. I said to him, If anything gets too hard, say it. And we stop. That deal works both ways. Im not going to push against your will anymore, just as you never do anything against mine. I want to be fair to you, Edward. His lips smiled a little grin and he said, This was a good idea, Bella. I wish Id thought of it. Believe me, Edward, your ideas are fucking incredible. I said and he laughed out loud for a few seconds.

Do you like being bound? I asked, my voice so innocent sounding. Yes., he answered quietly, his face pointed slightly to the right of mine. Why do you like it? I felt my hand rest on his leg, to reassure him that I was nearby. Its like he thought for a few seconds and said, someone wants you so much that theyve tied you there, to keep you from getting away. I like feelingwanted. His answers are good and coming easier to him than usual. I was so glad. Maybe my eyes stare back at him in some strange disbelief that makes him feel ashamed. And do you like feeling pain? I touched his right hand, unable to resist the urge to stroke him when he was this way. I wanted him to feel my gentle, painless touch while he was at my mercy instead of the agony he usually gets to experience. Sometimes, his voice was low and a little dreamy and I had a feeling the way I was petting him. When do you.not like it? my hands were still very slow and soothing on his arms. He hesitated but then said, I dont like beingraped. I thought, working with no men, that I could be spared that. ButI was naveand forgot all about strap ons. I was glad he couldnt see my eyes now and I didnt dwell on this topic for long. Andwhat do you like about it? I probed further, Pain, I mean? Mmm, hard., he grinned, thinking about it, Ummpain is rawand clean. Theres nothing else to think about when it has you, it demands attention and respect. There was a line to a song once that goes, I cut myself today to see if I can feel. I dont know how else to say it. Im sorry. Dont be youre doing so great, Edward. I touched his legs again, Im so glad you feel more expressive with the blindfold and all on. I didnt think this would be a good idea. Its brilliant, Bella., he smiled a little, I feel a lot lessnervous. Good. I placed a small kiss on his lips, seeing his surprised face smile more afterwards as he didnt see that coming. Mmmm, Dr. Bella he purred, I like the positive reinforcement. Tell me about when you first began working at Fire. I suggested, just moving my fingers along his knees now. Oh God, I was terrible! he laughed after that little confession and smiled as he continued, A week after I was hired, Victoria just throws her new guys to the lions on Friday night. I had worked out a little dance routine but I was trying to dance like all the other guys, trying to act sexy or something. I sucked!! I remember Emmett cringing as he stood in the audience, ice cubes and cold water being thrown at me, and women screaming PENIS, PENIS at me. Thank God I got another chance.

What happened then? I smiled, only at the beauty of his happy face wearing the blindfold. Victoria., he said, She took me out back and sort ofgave me some advice. She told me to drop my fear, kill my shame. I tried that later the same night and it worked. I got better after a lot of practice. I learned how to make my act my own, not copying from other dancers. That was the main thing that worked for me, being unique, I guess. Thats what Emmett says. Emmett sounds like a good friend. I said, liking him more and more as Edward talked about him. Yea. Edward agreed. Tell me a little bit more about Victoria. I touched his hands again, treading lightly for now. Shes a good friend, too., he said, looking pleasant enough as he answered, Shes the boss so at times she can come off a little hard and tough. She has to be, running that place all by herself. Shes very smart. And she protects us, all of us, who work for her. Well, Im talking about you and her now I pointed out, I know you speak well of her and thats great, but you said earlier, she would punish you if you didnt do the film today. She hurts you, Edward? She hasnt had to for awhile now he admitted, I dont give Victoria a hard time. I do what Im told. What if youdidnt do what she wanted? I asked, What if you just didnt show up for that film today? He scoffed and shook his head a little. Like I said, trouble. Edward reminded, Dont even go there. You dont want to stand nose to nose with her, trust me. Besides, she has the power over me. I have to do what she says or Im out. And that thought scares the shit of out of Edward and I already saw that once before. Why do you trust her so much when shes hurting you? I had to ask, it seemed that his eyes not looking into mine gave me a little courage, too. I told you, Bella., he reminded patiently, She watches out for me. If it werent for her, I would be dead now. Does that make it okay for her to do whatever she wants to you? I asked. Please, Bella, it is what it is. Edward said, not turning angry at all in his voice, I accepted it a long time ago. I was so nave before we met. I confessed, I didnt think there was so much crueltyor slavesorreal dungeons like I saw today. I hate that youre in this world, Edward. You deserve so much more. You deserve to be happy. You sound so sad, Bella he leaned his head on mine, cuddling, Dont be sad. I wish I didnt have to talk about all thisthen I could just focus myself 100% on making you happy. His lips softly reached out and touched my bottom lip so softly I nearly trembled from the emotion it brought out in me.

Dont you want to be happy, Bella? he whispered, his lips opening and crushing themselves over mine as his tongue licked up my closed lips. The moment it made contact there, he was in, his warm tongue tasting mine. Mmpphhh!!! I said, gently pushing him back into place, glad his naughty, skilled hands were tied, Edwardbe good. Im always good., he said with a bit of a swagger that I couldnt help smiling at. Can I ask a couple more questions nowabout Tanya? I asked timidly. I think next time we make love, itll be outside. Edward said in response to me, What do you think, Bella? You seemed to enjoy the bookstoreup until the end. HeyEdward I injected with a slight hint of annoyance, Were on my time at the moment Yes, Maam., he pouted, sticking his bottom lip out, his hands resting in his lap. Can we talk a little more about Tanya? I asked again. Yes., he looked a bit more tense now. How about if I ask yes or no questions. I offered, You can nod for yes, shake your head for no. Would that make it a little easier? He nodded silently. So adorable. I cant wait to fuck him outside. Hey, BELLA! Be professional for ONCE!! Okay, okaystop nagging me already!! Did you and Tanyadivorce? I started. He shook his head. No. Did Tanya leave? Again, he shook his head. No. This is bad. I had a feeling. Did Tanyadie?, my voice could hardly say the word, my eyes squinting as I watched his face, almost glad I couldnt see those sad, aching eyes. I waited for a minute or two and Edward bent his head, internally battling to answer me. He couldve said lo mein, but he didnt. He is trying to be braver and give me answers now. This is progress and Im so elated at how far weve come in only 5 short days. When he was ready, he lifted his head and nodded a couple times, exhaling a ragged breath, hurting going on inside him. I held his bound hands in mine and gave them a caring squeeze, wishing I didnt have to do this to him. Id much rather see him laughing and carefreebut I wanted it to be true, not an act to be put on for me. I know, Edward, I know it hurtsits okay to hurt. Dont be afraid. I whispered, cupping my hands around his cheeks, You are doing so wellcan we keep going a little more? After a few seconds, he nodded, his jaw clenching then slowly loosening. Was Tanya sick, Edward?

He shook his head. Then there must have been some kind of accident. Is that right?, I went as delicately as I could. He nodded. Alright. I said, I wont ask about that right now. Why did you say pass yesterday when I said the word child? I asked, realizing that wasnt a yes or no question, then I added, Did you and Tanya have a child? I kept holding his hands and his fingers curled a little bit more around mine. Edward, nothing you say will make me pull away. Nothing. I confirmed for him, I want to know you good, bad, and ugly. Im your friend. I wont leave you. He swallowed and let out a harder, more rugged breath, as if he were being slowly stabbed or cut. Then he nodded once. Yes. There was a child. Or there is. I prayed the child wasnt dead, too. Is it a boy? I found myself asking next, not releasing his shivering hands. He shook his head. No. A girl? I asked, picturing a little pixie with his fair white skin, crystal eyes and dark reddish hair. He nodded twice, his mouth in a solemn frown. Okay, good I breathed, stroking his hands with my thumbs, Are you alright, still, Edward? He took a breath and nodded. Yes, Bella. Thats enough for today. I said, my right hand moving to his face, stroking it with the back of my hand. Edward nodded again, not moving to free himself. Edward I whispered, so attracted to his innocence and his hidden emerald eyesand I grabbed the back of his hair in my fingers, placing small, hot kisses all over his mouth, from corners to the center. His kiss came back, adding fire and rough passion. I heard his voice moan as his fingers curled and uncurled in their bonds in his lap and I realized he was still technically tied up in my control. Finally, I stopped and his mouth still dropped tiny little kisses along my lips, then down my chin, he was blindly exploring. Alright, doll face, I giggled, loosening the knot behind Edwards head, Lets see those beautiful eyes And when I took the scarf away, I saw the tears in his eyes and my eyes cried too. Come here. I took the scarf off his wrists and held him as tightly to me as I could, stroking his hair as he held me too, his lips resting on my shoulder.

Thank you so much. I whispered in his ear that was right beside my lips, Thank you for trusting me. Bella he whispered, kissing me with even more affection, along my jaw, Bella Shhhits okay. I closed my eyes and just let my embrace encircle him, wishing it was enough to dry his tears forever, We dont have to say any more.

Later, we talked some more on the roof and I told Edward more about my boring past. He seemed so interested in everything I said. I revealed that Charlie was a cop and that didnt scare Edward at all. He said he admired police. At 3pm, Edward made his phone call and I went down to the apartment to invite Rosalie and Alice along to Fire tonight. They both had lots of questions and I told them Id talk to them about it later tonight. I also appointed Rosalie to keep an eye on me tonight. I had a feeling I was going to be drinking heavily during this whole evening. I kind of felt badly for not telling them more. We were best friends, but I still wanted to keep Edward all to myself. I felt wrong gushing on about the details of our sexual adventures and Id never tell them anything spoken to me in private during our therapy together. After about 20 minutes, Edward came into the apartment and curled his arms around me from behind, playfully kissing my neck, down my shoulder. MmmmI love your lips. I confessed, my head falling back against his rock hard chest. I love youreverything., he answered, his teeth closing down in the spot where my neck met my shoulder, But, alas, fair Bella, we dont have time for a proper fucking right now. Later. He moved back away from me as my voice whined. I watched him and he headed into my bedroom, opening the closet and moving some hangers. I laughed for a second and followed him. Are you dressing as a girl tonight? I teased. No, but you are., he smirked, tossing a couple things onto my bed, I want to see that little slut Ive been fucking tonight. Youll wear this. And do your makeup, the way you did for the bookstore. That was very hot. I looked on the bed and felt a little scared suddenly, but I didnt show it. And, as if he read my mind, he came over and tipped my chin up with his fingers. Youre always hot, Bella., he stated, So dont misunderstand me. Now come wash me. With this, he pulled me to follow him as he backed towards the bathroom.

EPOV

I cant believe it. 5 days. 5 fucking days and I practically told her everything. Everything I didnt want her to ever know. What kind of spell does this girl have over me, anyway? Why cant I resist her? Oh yea, because Ive fallen in love with her. Shit. This is against the rules. Victoria would murder me for this. I cant let it show tonight. Victoria will have been missing me this last week. Every morning I called and said I couldnt come in her voice became more and more tense. I would have to keep my distance from Bella tonight. Im glad her friends are going to be with her. This shouldnt be too difficult. Bella has already seen me in action at Fire. She knows what I do there. Dope, that was before she knew you. Now she holds you all night and curls her legs around yours while you sleep. Things are different now. Even when she didnt know me, she rescued me from that monster woman. She is starting to get attached to me. I can feel it in her every touch, her words are filled with compassion and care. I dont want her pity and she doesnt seem to pity me in an obvious way. Once therapy is done, she becomes my girl again. She hasnt said lo mein once to me. I didnt want to say it, either, when given the option. I want to tell her my whole story. I want her to be there and hold me while I say the words. I am going to hurt so badly after these two weeks are over. And worse, I will have to hide it. Victoria doesnt want to see that I care about someone else. She wont want to see me moping around, looking all depressed. Her arms dont hold anyone. And her words cut, they dont care. We are on the train now, on the way to Fire. And Im holding her hand and letting her legs lay on top of my extended ones on the empty seat in front of us, and all I can think of is our last shower together, only about an hour ago. She washed me this time, getting all that crappy makeup off my body, and before I knew it, she was on her knees, taking the entire length of my penis into her wet, warm mouthshe looked so fucking eatable as the water and soap suds ran down over her almost black shiny hair, moving down her slender neck towards her round, full breasts. It didnt take me very long to come. She has one talented mouth, both in talking and sucking. And that was no pity blow job. She was wild! It felt like she really and truly wanted to drink me down, all of me. I even screamed a couple of times, in a very masculine fashion, of course. Im glad she wanted to come with me. Part of me knew it might be hard for her to watch me working tonight, but this was the tamest job I worked, and was sort of PG-13 compared to my R and X rated activities. God, Bella looks smoking hot in that outfit I picked for her. Little tiny mini skirt, black lace that barely covered her tight little assblack stockings, ankle boots, stiletto heeland for her top, we combined a see-through white lace tank top with a black tank top that I ripped a little down the middle to expose a little peek at her naked tits inside, encased in sheer white. And before we had left the apartment, I added one more thing a little egg vibrator no wires on this one was now sitting deep inside her. I have the little remote control and I could tape it on the outside of my leg, up near my hip, and whenever I see her getting anxious or maybe a little jealous, I will give her a little

taste to calm her down a bitor rev her up if shes looking a tad depressed or sad. Maybe later, I could kidnap her again and take her to one of the private rooms, only this time Id give her more than a massage. Can you feel it, inside you? I reached between her legs, not caring about other people around us and felt the sheer panties I picked out for her to wear. I wish she had some thongs, but, sadly, no. Id have to have her friends take her shopping over the weekend. She is in desperate need of some sexy things. No. she trembled a little as her eyes twinkled at me, looking so sensual from inside the painted up eyes, the plum shades of eyeshadowthe black eyelinerthe glossy crimson lipsthe soft hints of blush accenting her cheekbones. I hit my remote from the pocket of my jeans, turning it up just a bit, and asked, Can you feel it now? Her eyes widened as her lips smiled at me, her fingers clutching at my arm for support, not to stop me. Yes! she gasped, her legs tensing as I enjoyed watching her squirm. Thats the low setting, Bella. I informed wickedly, Heres a little more. Cranking it up a notch, she gasped louder and her back arched high. Her little fists clenched and I took this opportunity to move her a little, to lay sideways, across my chest, and I forced her chin up with one hand, making her face point towards the people in the row beside us. My other hand slipped in under the white lace, plucking at her right nipple, twisting it as her boots clicked against the plastic seats they were perched on. Bend your legs up and open them, Bella. I demanded, Do it or I increase the speedand youll be howling like an animal in front of all these nice people, whether you want to or not. Her eyes opened like slits for a moment, then the fear of facing strangers made them shut again, tighter, as she obeyed me, her thighs and knees shivering. Very good, Bellayou are such a good girl. I praised her, kissing her lips and petting and stroking my fingers up and down her breasts underneath the fragile top she was wearing. She moaned out, trying to keep quiet. I almost laughed. Everyone around us had their eyes glued to us already, it didnt really matter. You like the way that feels, dont you, Bella? I growled into her ear as she panted and quivered. Yes., she answered, in a breathy whisper. Louder. I urged as she whimpered. Yes! she gasped again, quickly losing control of herself and her inhibitions. Kiss me. I ordered next and she clung onto my hair and pulled her mouth to mine, ravaging my mouth with a very brutal, wet kiss, her hips rocking a little as my hand moved to her panties, clutching them with my stern fingers. Theres my slut I cooed, Give me your nipple.

She half whimpered, the little shred of her good girl side dieing fast. But her hand moved to her right breast, and quickly brought it out of her top, holding it for me as her other hand, still in my hair, forced my face down to it. Wow. Bella, the bad girl is RED HOT! She is doing so well since she joined the Edward Cullen Institute for Future Bad Girls of America. She might make valedictorian! I licked, bit, and kissed that baby nipple until it was erect and rock hard. I loved the sounds of Bellas husky, sexed growls and moans. She wasnt even trying to be quiet anymore. I loved how she was obeying me without any hesitation. I cant wait to play Dom and slave next week!! What a wonderful blessing that she had some days off of school. She will be my slave for days! I hit the button to stop the vibrations all together and her body fell limply into my arms, her eyes opening and looking up at mine with raw distaste. We have to get off soon. I explained, cruelly. I WAS getting off! she argued. I laughed and kissed her lips affectionately, adjusting her top so her breast was back inside. The train was stopping now and I poked her in the ass with my finger, bidding her to stand up. Now, here is how sick New York is. We stood up and moved to the opening doors of the train andyes, this is truea round of applause burst out from behind us, where we just were sitting! I started to laugh but Bellas face turned the absolute shade of an eggplant! She yanked me by the shirt out of the car and didnt even look back as it charged on without us. You are so incredible. I said to her as I led her by the hand up the stairs towards the street. This city is so ill. Bella chuckled, getting over her embarrassment, I told my Dad this is the perfect place to be a psychiatrist. I smiled, agreeing totally with her. Yes, youll never run out of patients around here. I concurred. Well, maybe theyll have to lock us both up, then. She said behind me as we walked down the sunny street full of quick walking people. Ohhh, you enjoyed that, did you? I walked side by side with her now, proud of her courage. Yea., she said, as if it shouldve been obvious to me. I love trains. I grinned. Well, now, thanks to you, every time I get on one, Ill be all hot and bothered. , she pinked a bit in the cheeks. Good. I kissed her, looking both ways and crossing the street.

We had a quick bite to eat at this great little deli across the street from Fire. This is where I get my giant Icee, a sinful little pleasure of mine, before I go to work. Bella had one, too, a green apple one, in her hand as we left, about 4:45pm. Soyou dont have a car? she asked, after we ate and crossed the street. I wondered where that came from. Yea, I do. I said, I never drive it to work, though. Another rule I learned the hard way. Jealous boyfriends or husbandsthey sometimes hang around outside at night, waiting to jump us. One night, they really smashed up my poor baby before I came out. Then they tried to smash me up. Oh God., she sounded afraid for me, Did you get hurt? No. I grinned, I knew how to fight at that point. Emmett taught me. Dont worry, if anything ever happens, I can protect you. I almost told her how Victoria had my Volvo all fixed up, good as new, but for some unknown reason, I skipped that. Oooh, I love a man who knows how to kick ass., she said, surprising me again, Bruce Lee, Brandon Lee, tooJean Claude Van Dammeand nowEdward Cullen I laughed. Im no martial arts guy. I know how to fight dirty. Street fighting. Its not pretty like in the movies. We approached the club and I checked the alley with my eyes first before bringing Bella into it. Sometimes there were homeless there, or drug dealers. But, now, thankfully, it was empty and smelly, as usual. Hold your breath. I advised, leading her down the whole length of the alley, dodging broken bottles and puddles until we were behind Fire. Emmett was there, chewing on a piece of apple, enjoying the warm weather and sunlight. He wore a red muscle shirt and black shorts with sneakers. Hey Bro!, Emmett perked up when he saw us and stood, offering me a slice of apple. I took one and so did Bella, when he offered his little plastic container of fruit to her next. Emmett, I said, You remember Bella, dont you? How could I forget a face that beautiful? he laid on the charm, taking her hand and kissing it. I almost rolled my eyes. Is that what I look like? Hi Emmett., she giggled, not used to his attentions. So, Bella, has this jerk been treating you right? he asked her, ignoring me now as I chewed my apple slice. Hey! I injected. Yes, she blushed a little, holding my hand as she swallowed her apple piece, Hes ruined me for anyone else.

Thats because I dont want anyone else to have you. I said and immediately wanted to kick myself. I meant it but I didnt want to hurt her. I didnt want her to know how involved I was getting. She was smiling and not acting funny so I pushed that aside and said to Emmett, Victoria here yet? Not yet. Emmett popped another apple piece into his mouth, Just me so farand now you guys. Who am I tonight? I asked, wondering if I wanted to hear the answer. Vampire boy again., he smiled fiendishly, You were out for a whole week, so thats your punishment. Everyone else hates doing it. Including me. I complained. I thought you said you didnt mind. Emmett reminded. Bellas already seen me as the vampire. I kept griping. Tough., he smiled without sympathy. Come on. I dropped it and took her into the back door, my voice tender and sweet now, You can help oil me. Somehow, I think Id enjoy your hands on my back much more than Emmetts. She laughed and followed me, but instead of going into the dressing rooms, I brought her out into the empty club area. There wasnt anyone here, as Emmett said. Wow, it looks kind ofnot so bad with all the lights on and no one else around. Bella commented as I opened the vampire cage and made sure it was fairly clean. The cage door slammed behind me and my head spun, seeing her on the other side, smirking devilishly at me. Bad little vampire., she said with a dark tone to her voice. I frowned and hissed at her, lunging at the bars of the closed door, yanking and uselessly pulling on the hard steel between us. She stood her ground as I poked my nose a bit through the bars, a low growl coming out of my throat, a sexual snarl. You want a little taste?, she teased me, placing her throat between the bars, Come ondont be shysnack time. She is getting very good at playing. I love that. My tongue lapped at her throat, sucking the flesh and kissing over every vein and muscle available to me there. I growled contentedly and she moaned, too, enjoying it as much as I was. Good boy., she stroked my hair through the bars. I went to take a bite but she jerked back, angry now. No biting, you evil thing! she scolded me, slamming her hand into the bars, trying to suppress her groan at the pain in her hand as I bit my lip to hold my laughter inside.

You will get no dinner tonight, just for that., she punished. I made my face sad and she melted. She opened the cage door and stepped inside, saying, This is where we met. Now theres a story to tell the grandchildren. We laughed as she closed the door behind her. I opened my mouth to stop her but it was too late. She pinned my back to the bars and kissed me and I hit the button in my jeans pocket again, giving her a small little buzzing inside. No she moaned into my mouth a little as my tongue rolled around hers, the tastes of cherry icee and green apple mixing together surprisingly well. Yes. I grinned, digging my fingernails into her ribs, holding her hips to mine as my cock hardened. NoEdward dont she whimpered, her nails scraping down my t-shirt in back, You work herewe cant Emmett will sit outside for another hour. I informed, sliding the straps on her shoulders down hard, forcing them down to her waist, exposing the perfect breasts, then lifted the skirt a bit, moving the panties aside, And no one else will be here for a couple more hours I unbuttoned my jeans, unzipped and pulled them down just enough to release my cock from my denim prison. You have no condom. Bella thought she had me therebut I had planned for this. Wrong, little girl. I smirked, taking one out of my jeans pocket, Vampire whores always have condoms, dont forget that. I spun her around roughly, putting her hands on the bars, silently ordering her to hold onto them. Then I bent her over a bit, placing my red vampire condom on, and holding her legs, I pierced myself inside her. She screamed out and so did Iher pussy was still so tight, it squeezed me every time I entered, holding me tight like she loved to do to my body all the time. Her legs were spread out wide and I moved slowly in and out of her, at times coming all the way out, then penetrating her again, all the way in. I wanted to do this to you that first night you walked in here. I said in a jagged voice as I moved inside her, my fingers stroking over her ass cheeks, And I know the egg is still inside youbuzzing away as I fuck youlets turn it up a bit, shall we? Nono she gasped as I reached down a bit more, finding the button and increasing the speed even higher than in the subway. This will make you lose your brilliant little mind, Bella. I kept pumping inside her, going a bit faster now, You wont have the will or reason to control yourself now. So you scream nowscream for me, bitch!

And she was screeching and howling like a mindless thing, a pleasure ridden lump of flesh at my mercy as her white ass cheeks slapped against my pelvis as I rode her harder. It wasnt long before she was screaming, FUCK!! FUCK!! at the top of her lungs, all inhibitions and shyness a memory. I shoved her breasts into the bars, lifting her legs with my arms so her feet were off the ground, dangling and kicking uselessly as my hands took the bars on each side of me, slamming harder and harder, a brutal beast myself nowgrunting and panting over her half bare back below. No matter what else you see tonight, I grunted, Know thisthat I fucked you in this tiny cageand that youre my bitchand that youre taking me home with you tonightand then I wanna fuck you on the roof. She screamed out, affected by my words and coming hardI was gladI wasnt much further behind her and I exploded and cried out, growling savagely. Carefully, I lowered her legs down and eased her body down to the floor of the cage, a nice little black fur floor there as she rested, laying her cheek against the bars, holding onto them, and then she screamed and jerked again, whimpering, Please, Edwardpleaseno I frowned, wondering what was wrongthen a light bulb lit above my head. Oh, the egg! I snickered, hitting the stop button, Sorry, sweetheart. I zipped up, deciding to clean up the condom mess once we got out of here, but first I needed to check the egg. Come here, Bella, open up for me I eased my voice as I parted her legs and reached in, inserting my two fingers as she arched her back and screamed out, clinging to the bars. Shhh, shhhits okay I had to reach way up to find the egg and I moved it back down into place, right inside her lips, not too high up, that would only be painful for her, not exciting, There you gosorry about that, Bella. Sorry about what? she panted, her eyes looking heavy, That was so fuckinggreat! Well, I meant the egg I smirked, And the cage door. What? she frowned, waking up now, What about the cage door? Its locked. I informed, sitting on the floor behind her. What? she looked panic stricken. When you closed it, it locked., I stated, Were prisoners now. No. she thought I was kidding, but she looked scared. I laughed, Try opening it if you dont believe me. And she did. There was no knob in here to open it with. Then she tried putting her hands through the bars to come under the handle to open it, but the way the bars sat, your hands dont reach the handle that way.

I couldnt help laughing again. Its funny to see someone else try to escape the cage for a change., I said, folding my arms. Emmett!! I finally called, chuckling, Emmett, save us! I was smiling until I heard high heeled shoes clicking down the stairs that led down from Victorias office. Shit! I got to my feet and wasnt sure what to do. Bella. I cupped my hands under her arms, Stand upstand behind me. She didnt look like she understood but she did it. I fixed her shirt and lowered her skirt into place fast as the footsteps kept coming. As she reached the bottom of the stairs, she turned and now came into my view. Edward! she smiled and lit up inside, What are you doing in there all alone and dressed, my sweet? She was coming to let me out as I smiled and said, I stepped in to clean it a bit and it fell closed. Sorry,Victoria. I wish I were able to keep Bella out of her view completely, but as she got closer, she saw Bella standing there behind me. Oh, you have a little friend in there with you., she kept smiling and looked at Bella, up and down, And shes so cute, too. Victoria didnt move to the door to open it yet, she stood there, outside the cage, moving around to the side, to get a better look at Bella. You must be Bella., she greeted with a nice, friendly tone while I watched like a hawk, hoping Victorias fangs didnt come out. Not in front of Bella, please. Yes, Bella Swan., Bella replied in a low, emotionless voice. Im Victoria., she said proudly, putting her hands on her hips. She was wearing a tight little gray business type dress, sexy and short, cleavage showing. A pause came up and I tried to break the silence. Im Edward. I informed and only Victoria laughed at my little joke. Bella stared at Victoria, not showing anything in her eyes. Yes, Im Edward and I have a mess in my jeans, can I be released now? Yes, I know youyoure my Edward Victoria didnt emphasize the word MY but she did make her point as she walked up to the cage door and opened it, It must be you hes trying to free, Bella, Edward loves spending time in this little cell, dont you, Edward? Yes, Victoria. I smiled, letting Bella step out first as I held her hand to support her. She was out and I went to follow but Victoria slammed the door closed on me, almost getting my foot. Stay., she gave me a hard look as my stomach sank.

Bella looked back at me with worry in her face as Victoria took her by the hand and smiled, saying, Come over here and sit down. Youre a client now and I do want to make sure youre happy, Bella. My eyes felt like they were round hollow holes as they sat at a table right alongside me. The cage was slightly higher than the table and they sat down. Bellas eyes stayed on me and she gave me a little grin to relax me. Im not really a client. Bella said in a respectful and low voice, looking very uncomfortable there with Victoria. Sure you are. Victoria smiled and winked at me, You paid for him, your check cleared, and you are fucking him. Victoria, I have to start getting ready for the show. I cut in, not wanting Bella to yell or shout at Victoria. It would be a huge mistake. Edward, kneel !, she barked at me and my eyes darted to Bella. Oh God, how humiliating would it be to kneel after she ordered me to, instead of trying to help Bella. What would Bella think of me? Shed see me as weak. Dont look at her, I said KNEEL! Victoria sneered, not even turning to look at me. I slammed to my knees with a loud, angry thud, my fists at my sides, my head turned away, ashamed, in front of Bella. I made myself a statue, staring at the bars as Victoria said, And silence, too, Edward. Bitch. Motherfucking, cocksucking, Queen of Whores, burn in Hell for eternity, God damned bitch! Is that really necessary?, Bella asked with a tense voice, You dont have to humiliate him. And dont I own him right now? I dont want him to kneel. Edward, stand up. Oh nowhat do I do now? Before I could think to do anything, Victorias voice rose up. He wont disobey me. He knows his place, Bella., Victoria glanced in my direction as I stayed still, hating myself for listening to her. Hating myself, period. Then she spoke to Bella, her voice still polite but icy, Im just going to say this once, Bella Swan. And Im going to be nice because youre a customer. Edward is not yours. He is mine. You are renting him, like a DVD. You can play him all you like and have a good time with him, by all means, but when youre through, clean him up real good and make sure he gets back to the store in the same condition he left in. Because theres a line of other people waiting their turn. I hope you take no offense. I do like you, Bella. But I just had to make things clear. Bella didnt answer and I was glad she was too smart to dare it. It would get very nasty and then, Victoria could order me to leave Bella. And it would kill me to miss the next nine days with her. It would kill me to miss an hour with her. She got up and walked over to the door of my cage, opening it. Edward, stand and go get ready., she ordered and I slowly stood up, unable to hide my expression of anger and betrayal at her as I stepped out of the cell and

went down the three steps, moving past Bella and to the hallway towards the dressing rooms. Enjoy your evening, Bella. Victoria said to Bella behind me. The cage door closed and Victorias heels walked the other way. I heard Bella calling me from behind but I kept rushing, getting to the dressing rooms and yanking the door open to a small bathroom, slamming it behind me. I roared, slamming my fist into the mirror, hating my weak face and weak soul. My knuckles felt wet and stung a bit but I didnt care. I spun around to the cement wall on my right and pounded my fist against it again and again, growling and letting the pain sink in, calming me a bit. Why did she do that? Victoria never went out of her way to fucking humble me like that, unless a client asked for it. And Bellawhat she must think of me nowI closed my eyes and pictured a look of pure repulsion on her face and it killed me inside. I roared out again, wanting to trash the whole bathroom. Edward! she was calling, knocking on the door, Edward, are you okay? Its Bella. I had to calm down. I had to hold my anger init was threatening to spill over. Go away Bella! I felt my ass on the floor as my eyes looked at my shivering hand, it looks like my fingers arent brokenthey can all bend. Victoria called me a DVD. Christ ! I shouldve told her to go fuck herself. Yea, hello. Id be starving in a week. And Katie would never get the rest of her cosmetic surgeries. I had to stop being a girl and get my act together. I have to be good and not complain. She likes me better that way. A few minutes later, I cleaned up my condom mess and zipped up my jeans, taking off my shirt and washing my hands, cleaning up the little cuts on my skin. When I opened the door, Bella was waiting, sitting in my chair next to Emmett. They had been talking and stopped when I came in. I smiled and said, Here you are. Edward she looked a little sad again but I didnt let her say anything else. I wanted to erase what Victoria did and pretend it never happened. Bella I stopped her, putting my fingers over her lips softly, I told youVictoria is very tough sometimes. She has to be. Lets just forget her and have a good night, okay? Her eyes looked a little wet but she made herself smile at me and agreed. Alright., she said, looking down. I lifted her chin with one finger and kissed her very, very, softly. Emmett just ignored us and ate his apples, the last of them. Thanks for not leaving. I said, head to head with her, closing my eyes, still trying to hide the shame in them.

I told you, she kissed the cleft in my chin, Youre never getting rid of me. I kissed her again, holding her by the back of the head and Emmett turned, smiling at us and complaining, You guys are making me sick already! Get a room! Shut up. I slapped Emmett in the back of his head. Can I watch you put your makeup on? she asked me now, looking excited about this. She is so intelligent I knew that she was trying to do the same as I had done, put on a happy face and forget the last few minutes, because talking or thinking about it now would just be too unbearable. But I knew it would come up in therapy tomorrow. Sure. I grinned.

EPOV Later on, after I had my pale white face done and my teeth were glued on, it was time to put my eyes in. Its gonna be evil vampire tonight. I told her, my voice a little weird from the teeth in my mouth. Cool. Bella grinned, a glint of pleasure in there, Thatll let you get out some pent up rage I smiled back at her, knowing she meant well. And I put the red eyes in. Oh my GOD!, Bella looked afraid of me with these eyes in, Those are WICKED, Edward! Arent they? I bared my teeth and hissed at her. She let out a squeal, darting away from me as Emmett and I laughed. Soon, Jasper and a few of the other dancers on for tonight trickled in, getting their assignments and dressing for it. Bella was especially funny as she helped oil me up for tonight. At first she was a bit grossed out by the slimy texture of the oil, but then, as she rubbed it over my pecks and down my abs, and the scent of my flesh combined with the sweet smell of the oil lured her inand she was very much enjoying herself by the time I turned and let her do my back. The other guys were so jealous of me and they said so right in front of us, making Bella blush again. They were asking when she was going to do them. I said never, shes mine. And Bella blushed even deeper. I just cant stop saying things like that. My big mouth is so stupid. I didnt want her thinking I wasnt going to let her go when our time was up. I would not become some whore stalker. I would let her go, smiling, thanking her for this brief, magical piece of her lifeand I would never make her regret choosing me. Bella went to meet her friends out in front as I got my shredded leather shorts on.

Victoria came in and I cast my eyes downward, grabbing the leash and clipping it into my collar. Its times like this Im glad Im a good actor. This would take some work. Hi beautiful boy., she lifted my chin with the leash and carefully placed a little kiss upon my mouth, not wanting to mess up my makeup. I kissed back, smiling at her with all the sweetness I could muster. She never apologized to me, for anything she did. We just acted as if it never happened. She liked it that way. Hi beautiful boss. I said back, hoping shed think I wasnt holding any grudge. Deep inside, I was fuming. Come, my wicked beast, she yanked on my leash as she began to walk down that dark hallway, Time to cross the line.

14 BPOV Rosalie, Alice and I were sitting at a different table than last week. We were guests of the club now and at a great table right near the stage and all our drinks were free. The waiters were taking very good care of us, too, but I just kept looking around for Edward. I had told the girls the whole story already of Victoria and how she treated Edward. They were both very pissed off, too, but their second reactions were even more disturbing. Rosalie took a sip of her drink and later said, Its a shame, but, what are you gonna do about it? You cant change it. Places like this are owned by mobsters and stuff, you know. How do you know Victorias not the daughter of some Soprano-type guy? You better just leave it alone. And in response to her comments, Alice said, He is really handsome and sweet and I know you like him, Bellaand that youre having relations with himbuthe sounds verymessed up. I mean, yes, hes a good study and all for your paper, but, if I were youId tell him that you dont want to be involved in all this stuff. These are his problems, not yours. I mean, you cant possibly have any kind of future with this guy. Rosalie looked around and danced to the music playing, watching out for dancers, but none were out on the floor yet. I ignored their thoughts, not wanting to hear itbecause these horrid thoughts had occurred to me, too. My head told me to get out of this relationship, to ask him to leave, to return to my life of school and friends and the Nick at Nite channel. But whenever I close my eyes, I see him. Whenever I see his face, I want him. Whenever I kiss him, I want his love. I want his life. I want to die holding his hand. I dont see a whore, a toy, or a slave, or even a person damaged. I see

Edwardand I love himcompletely. Theres no out for me. Im a trapped slave now, too. Only I dont want to be free. I know the realities and the cons of this situation. I know if we attempted a relationship, it would be painful and bittersweet and hard. But I want it anyway. I was once tired thinking of all wed have to figure out and endure. Now, I want to start climbing those jagged mountains that stand in our way. I want Victoria dead. Nothing had ever made me feel more sick to my stomach in my life than the moment she ordered Edward to kneel in his cage like he was her dog. And the way he looked at me. I had to put a poker face on or Id just make it worse for Edward. Even though Id have loved it if he yelled at her or refused to obey her, I knew he wasnt ready for that yet, emotionally, financially, or otherwise. And she would hurt him, maybe even right in front of me. Then I would have to strangle the bitch. In his heart, he is still her slave. Its a dark place, his place, as Victoria put it, but as he said, he is wanted there. He is secure there. And maybe, being Victorias, a woman who is cold and cruel, is safe for him. He doesnt have to worry about falling in love again with her as his significant other, and then there is the financial help she seems to give him. Alice is a master computer genius and she is majoring in accounting, too. Maybe sometime, if we ever got to that point, she could be helpful in checking out Victorias financial dealings. If I had some dirt on her, maybe I could help Edward somehow. That might be a plan. Emmett was the first one here tonight. He must have a key. I wonder if he can be trusted in going against Victoria. Probably not. He belongs to her, too. When Edward had gone into the bathroom, I heard glass breaking and I was freaking out that maybe Edward was hurting himself, especially after he yelled go away at me. But Emmett told me to relax. He sat me down and told me Edward wouldnt kill himself. He has a daughter hes caring for. So that confirmed Edwards daughter was alright and alive and that made me very happy. He didnt tell me a lot of details, he said that wasnt his place, but he did tell me something else. Edward is never going to stop working here, Bella., he said, not trying to sound threatening, but telling me straight, Victoria has him and she wont let go. And shes not someone you fight against, Bella. Dont underestimate her. Shes dangerous. Justfinish your time with himhave funand then forget him. This can get real bad if you try to take Edward away from her. Shes not always mean to him like you saw just now. To him, usually, shes pretty nice. She throws him wild birthday parties, for Gods sake! She even gave him a room here when he couldnt find his own place. He lives here? I almost sneered the words. God, how deep are this womans claws into this man? Yea. Emmett said, I used to live down there. Its not pretty, but its a warm and clean room. Note to self: sneak downstairs and check out his room before the night is over.

I pictured some dank, horrible basement with a cot in the corner and a cage on the other end of the room. I wonder if she has a water bowl with Edwards name carved on it down there. The place was dark and red neon lights danced around the club as I downed my third drink of the night. I had ordered something strong, as I didnt know a lot about liquor, and I was brought something clear and in a tiny little shot glass. It made my chest feel hot and tingly seconds after I swallowed it and I was now ordering another one. Hey, girl, take it easy there. Alice smiled, watching me open my notebook, Oh, you brought that here again?! I know youre both here to ogle naked men, but I am doing research. I smirked, writing a note on the paper before me, squinting, able to see a little as I wrote: Edward lives in a room below Fire. Edward has a daughter, and shes alive somewhere. He supports her financially. Chances of him quitting lifestyle slim. Accident happened. Tanya is dead. Injuries to child??? Victoria, boss, very possessive. Financial reasons ?? Emotional reasons?? I stopped, I could hardly see what I was writing here and then I heard Victorias voice above us, amplified by microphone. Welcome to Fire, LADIES!!, her voice greeted very enthusiastically, Welcome! We have a great show prepared for you tonight, but first, I have to secure my vampire, if youll all indulge me for a moment. I noticed the women this time. They all spun around, towards the corner where Victoria had entered with Edward last time. I am guessing lots of these women are regulars, and maybe hoping that Edward will be the vampire tonight. I didnt want to look but my eyes wanted to see Edward, even if it meant he was being dragged across the floor on a leash by that cunt. Wooo!!! These drinks, whatever they are, are kicking in! I feel soviolent. The first time I saw Edward playing vampire, he was a good vampire. Tonight he said he was playing bad vampire. I was curious what the difference would be. Come on, you bad THING!!, she was struggling in the shadows, then a white light found them, illuminating the scene, This is our vampire. Please dont touch him yet, until hes in his cage, girls. He is extremely dangerous and doesnt play well with others. Victoria was trying to drag Edward by his neck into the club, only this time, he didnt look so weak and crawling along like last time. He let out a savage roar and yanked back on the leash, showing his strength was greater than hers. Victoria let out a scream and strained to keep her grip on the leash. NO!!, she shouted, Stop it!! STOP !! Youre gonna get it, BOY!!

Hissing at her, Edwards red eyes looked filled with rage and he snapped his teeth at her, making her let the leash go and fall backwards as the bad vampire crouched on all fours, like a cougar, hearing the screams of the women around him, smelling the scent of all this human blood. No, quiet !! Everyone hold perfectly still! Victoria said into her little microphone on her lapel, sitting on the floor before the newly freed vampire. And every woman there was dead quiet. So was I, this was great. I hoped Edward got to slap that bitch with the leash now. That would be something I would love to see over and over. Why didnt I bring my camcorder? Baring his teeth more, Edward was growling at Victoria, slowly moving around her, as if stalking his prey, waiting for his opening to strike. Easy Victoria tried speaking sweetly to the monster that surveyed her, Easy, boydont be afraidno ones going to hurt you. He tilted his head to the side, and heard a woman behind him, at a table, say something loudly like, I would hurt him! At this, Edward leapt up to his feet and jumped onto the surface of the womans table, his bare feet on the black tablecloth. The woman who commented at him screamed and in a second, when the light found him again, he had this blonde woman in her late 30s on her knees, on top of the table. His hands clutched her arms at her sides and he was lapping at her neck, much to her delight. Then his hand grabbed her long hair, yanking her head back as he kept tasting the throat he had captured. And here comes drink number six! I downed my shot glass in one big swig that time. Or was that drink five? Oh, who cares? Suddenly, I felt something between my legs, a nice light vibration, extremely warm and soothing. Uuuuhhhh I let my pleasured moan spill right out of my mouth in front of Rosalie and Alice, but they werent paying much attention to me. They were staring at Edward and laughing. I felt my feet point towards each other under the table and my legs parted a bit, making the buzzing inside me feel even better and faster. And then when I saw Edward licking that other womans neck I felt even more aroused. No matter what you see tonight, know thisthat I fucked you in this tiny little cage and youre my bitch I heard his voice saying it to me and my hand gripped the edge of the table, then the tablecloth, twisting it tight into my reddened fingers, my mouth falling open as my tongue licked my top lip, my panties began to feel wet and warm. Mmmmm. I was trying to hold my sounds inside me now. I tried leaning forwards, half laying on the table before me, but that only intensified the evil little bug inside me. My eyes opened and found Edward again, and it looked like Victoria was trying to sneak up behind him now, with Emmett in a cop uniform at her side, twirling a nightstick while Victoria had a rope with a big loop on the end of it.

My mouth spoke up without my brains permission. LOOK OUT, EDWARD!! BEHIND YOU!! I heard myself scream out. Alice and Rosalies faces spun in my direction and laughed at that and on the floor, a sudden scuffle occurred. Edwards head turned towards the two about to pounce on him and immediately Emmett dove upon the vampire, play hitting him over his back with the nightstick, the bad vampire howling and roaring in pain and protest. At the same time, Victoria looped the rope around his neck and yanked it, slightly choking the half naked vampire on the floor below her. Good, got him! Victoria announced, Emmett slapping handcuffs on Edwards hands, pinning them behind him as he struggled with all his might. Emmett helped Victoria secure Edward into the cage, Victoria pulled the rope as Edward tried to crawl behind her on his knees, and whenever he resisted, Emmett would poke him or strike him in the back or ribs with his nightstick to get him moving again. Once in the cage, Emmett removed his handcuffs and closed the door, an instant roaring Edward lunging at the bars, hissing and growling with no words. Thank you, officer. Victoria said to Emmett and he gave a nod of authority, taking his leave and earning a large round of applause. And you! Victoria had her stick again and slammed it against the bars at Edward, You ARE VERY, VERY BAD!! Edward hissed and roared, filled with rage and fight. No tasting the customers!! You know that !! Youre gonna get it tonight, you bastard!! Victoria warned, poking the stick in between the bars and hurting the vampire as he shouted out, frowning more. Sorry about that, ladies. Victoria fixed her hair a bit and straightened her skirt, We will deal with him later tonight. I think severe punishment is in order, dont you, girls?! A loud chorus of howling and cheering and clapping erupted and then my little buzzing between my legs stopped abruptly, making me feel very empty inside. Ohhhh. I whined, not feeling it anymore, So mean He is bad. The first dancer of the night was announced and a man I never saw before with long black hair and tan skin swung by a vine onto the stageTarzan. He was nice looking and a good dancer, but not my type. My eyes kept wandering to the dark little cage across the room from me. I couldnt see him very well and there were women over there, but I couldnt see what they were doing. I hate this table. Its too far from the vampire cage. I guess they thought they were doing us a favor, letting us sit right by the stage, but last weeks table was better. Edward reached out of his cage and swiped my notebook, thats how close he was to me then. I want to be back there.

Rosalie and Alice were dancing in their seats, liking the song Jungle Love that was playing, and appreciating the dancer onstage. I received my sixth drink and swallowed it downor was that my fifth? Nofourthseventh? Oh, who cares? I dont what this stuff is, but Im liking it. It seemed in a few seconds, the Tarzan guy was finished and gone. Oh well, I motioned to our waiter and ordered another drink for myself. The lights grew a bit brighter in between dancers and my eyes darted over to the cage where the love of my life was trapped. I could see him better now and there was a woman there, a beautiful woman with long black hair in a braid, smiling and holding a cherry in her teeth, her hands held a belt that she mightve taken off her own waist and was now securely behind Edwards head, holding his face between the bars as he licked the cherry, smiling, then his lips fully closed over it, kissing her mouth as he ate the cherry. Dont get mad, dont get madits all an act, dont forget that. Thats what Edward told meOh, goody, my third drink is here! These are so smooth! Whatever they are. What are those, anyway? Alice asked me, taking it and smelling it. Gimme! I frowned, taking it back a little roughly, spilling a few drops. Bellas getting wasted tonight, that much is clear. Rosalie smirked, sipping her red drink. Oh, give her a break. Alice said, She never gets drunk. And tonight cant be easy for her. Those women practically have their hands down Edwards pants. Where?! I stood up, ready to tear hair out of womens heads but Rosalie yanked me down by the arm. Sit, girl., she ordered, Behave or Ill cut you off. You said you could handle this. Remember, being a psychiatrist calls for you to be there through some of the toughest times in a persons life? Remember your little speech on the phone today, Bella? I know but I heard myself whimper, as tears came to my eyes, I love him! I knew it. Alice smiled and pointed at Rosalie, I won that bet! Pay me. Rosalie frowned at me and dug into her purse, giving Alice a twenty dollar bill. Did anyone hear me or is your bet more important than my broken heart?, I asked, feeling a little loopy. Oh, Im sorry, youre right. Alice leaned over, putting her arm around me, laying her face on my hair, Dont drink anymore, alright, Bella? You dont want Edward to see you that way. Rosalie was across from me and tried to help now. Itll be okay, Bella. Rosalie said softly, First love is always the toughest. Youll get over him, eventually. It takes a little time, but well be there for you. I dont want to get over him. I held my head in my hands.

Lets change the subject, Alice Rosalie made a cutting motion across her throat, shaking her head. And then, came a very fast vibration between my legs. I guess Edward peeked over at me and saw my head in my hands. UUUGGHHHH!!! I flew back into my chair, parting my legs and wrapping my feet around the rungs of my chair under the tablecloth. A couple of little gasps escaped me and then I remembered Rosalie and Alice. Are you alright? Alice asked, concerned, Do you want to throw up or something? I shook my head, whimpering, No. SWEET FUCK, the thing is laying to the side a bit now inside me and is jerking with insane speed right at an angle that is sparking feelings in me I never knew I had. My body feels like its coming to life for the first time! My panties are so wet. I want to rub my pussy against the bars of that god damned vampire cage now!! And I dont care who sees it! If my father were here, I wouldnt care! Pleasewait I was panting and babbling incoherently and I knew it. My head was laying backwards and then it was down on the table, my fists wringing my napkin so tight, I thought the red dye would leak out of it. Let her rest a minute. Rosalies voice said across from me and as the room darkened a bit, I stuck the napkin in between my teeth, biting down hard as a strangled cry melted into its soft cloth gag. I was growling a little as I came, hiding it pretty well, I thought. The waiter came over and placed another drink down next to me and leaned down, speaking into my ear. Edward sent me a message for you, Bella., his deep, sensual voice informed, He says everyone knows youre coming and hes so proud of his little slut. I picked my head up, daring to look at him with the napkin in my teeth as the dark haired waiter chuckled. You are a cute one., he said, dotting my nose with his finger as he departed the table, vanishing into the blackness. At that I felt the buzzing cease and again, I felt cheated and like stone again. My mouth opened in disappointment and the napkin fell out of it, and I saw Edward laughing at me from his little round cell, puckering his lips and kissing the air as he stared at me, looking very pleased with himself. I couldnt help but smile back at the bastard. As the night went on, Rosalie and Alice let me talk some more about my feelings for Edward. I wasnt drunk, just slightly buzzed (besides the vibrator buzz) and very talkative. I wasnt telling secrets about Edwards life to them, only things like: Even at school, I can smell him on my clothes. His fucking eyesare the most beautiful eyes in the world. Dont you think?

His little butt is so perfect and muscularbut soft, tooand not one ugly hair on the mans whole body! I love falling sleep with his face on my chestand stomach His body feels so solid and hot behind me when he does the spoon position with me. And he kisses my shoulder bladessoooo soft. His lips are like hot water. He has this amazing singing voicehe sang me to sleep once, Alice! How can I go back to falling asleep alone now? I didnt even pay attention to the dancers onstage. I cant even see other men anymore. I am doomed. My heart was sure to be broken very soon. Its inevitable, as much as the end of our time together. Alright, ladies, its time to punish our vampire!, Victoria announced and the lights turned up, revealing the cage and my Edward inside it, all alone. Women went running from their tables to the cage and quickly formed a line, like last week. Rosalie almost got up but I glared at her and felt my teeth sneering at her. I was just going to go to the ladies room!, she smiled, widening her eyes at me, Jeez!! Ill watch her., Alice held my hand, saying, Dont even look over there, Bella, its disgusting what these women enjoy. LASH. RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!, I heard Edward roar and tears came to my eyes. My legs quivered and wanted to stand up as the smacks of the whip striking Edwards flesh stabbed me like knives, not to mention the yells and panting he was doing. He truly sounded like he was in pain. I wondered if Edward lied to me about the whip not hurting him really. Theyre hurting him! I clutched my hair and cried a little, trying to block the sounds out. Alice stroked my hair and said, No, no. Its okay. Hes alright. See, hes kissing them afterwards. And look, he just smiled a little. It is an act. And then, like magicthe buzzer between my legs began again, starting very low and timidly. I rested my cheeks on my hands and closed my eyes, concentrating on only what the little ball inside me was saying. Edward wants you to feel pleasure nowbe happydont you want to be happy, Bella?such a good girlI want to see that slut Ive been fucking tonightlay back.youre my little bitchcount off backwards, from five to one The speed began to increaseand then increase a little moreand a little moreblurs of Edward being whipped with his hands up in the cuffs over his head both bothered meand at other times, excited me.

I had little mini-orgasms before the huge one that arrived when a woman in the cage poured her drink over Edwards back and then lashed at it with the whip, the wet splashes mixing with the liquid slaps of the leather. Edward roared louder that time and I came so hard, biting down my teeth in complete mute lust, my legs under the table convulsing and wide apart, hidden from view. After that, the buzzer was working hard and was painful now to the sensitive tissue inside meI took the pain, feeling somehow connected with Edward in that as he was nearly finished taking his punishment. A tear fell out of my eye and I let it travel beautifully and torturously slowly down the entire length of my face. Alice and Rosalie were watching Edward, too, and talking to each other at the moment, and I was so thankful to have that little chunk of time to myself, unwilling to explain it to any outsider. And then, the little torment going on inside my pussy ended. My body went limp as if I were a puppet and someone had just cut the strings. I let my dizzy eyes focus as Victorias voice was informing the crowd of her vampires reluctance to speak to humans. And then she was whipping him again, asking him to promise not to kill any of her mortal clientele. It was agonizing, waiting to hear his voice and then it was in the air, its rich, deep tone stroked me mentally as he said, I promise. And all the sick bitches in the place cheered and howled at him, racing over to his cage again for some groping, kissing, and being bitten by the evil vampire. Edward had mercy on me during this and left the vibrator off, giving me time to recover and order another drink. I think this one is my fourth one? My eighth one? I dont care. Wow, that tastes good! Whatever it is. Rosalie and Alice were kind enough not to go to the vampire cage and I was happy about that. Id hate to sit in class with them, seeing the empty bald spots in their heads, knowing I tore that hair out with my bare hands. After all, they are my best friends. I would feel badly about that later. I wanted to be the last woman on line and be able to pay Victoria a huge obscene amount of money and enter the cage alone, taking off my clothes very slowly as Edward watched me, surprise and confusion in his eyes. Then I would leap up into his arms and wrap my legs around his pelvis, making him take me right there, as he had earlier, only now I wanted all these sick women watching it, seeing that he was mine and mine alone. And that he wanted me, for real, unlike the rest of them. But Rosalie and Alice babysat me and didnt allow me to make a complete fool of myself. They kept me at our table until, after five eternities passed by, Edwards vampire act was over and Victoria grabbed him by the leash. Say good night to the nice ladies, boy., Victoria smiled and stroked Edward. Good night, beautiful ladies., the dark vampires voice was now well behaved and seductive, earning him a nice round of applause as Victoria led him away on his hands and knees. I want to kill that bitch. I heard myself say to my friends.

Alright, I think Bellas done drinking tonight. Alice snickered, looking at Rosalie. EPOV Once back in the dressing room, Victoria let go of my leash and smirked at me. Good boy, Edward., she said approvingly, touching my hair, You were very good tonight. Thanks Victoria., I said, giving her a little smile. I wanted to get cleaned up so I could get back on the floor and keep an eye on Bella. I know her friends are with her, but I still wanted to make sure she was doing alright. I know she hated seeing me whipped and I did notice her drinking out of a shot glass. Id check with her waiter and see what they were giving her. You take the floor after this, okay?, Victoria asked, running a hand through her long mane of hair. This meant that I would not be serving drinks. I would just wear a g-string and go from table to table, lap dancing and being available for whatever the tables wanted. She was actually trying to be nice I thought, relieving me of the waiter duties, but then she said, And I want you in my office at 11. Oh no. Not tonight of all nights, please UmmVictoria? I asked with a small voice as she was about to turn away from me. Yes?, she looked a bit confused. I never question her. Bella is here tonight., I tried to hint at my meaning. Yes, I know, we talked, she seems very cute. Whats your point?, she raised a brow, smiling. Well, I just thought, I cleared my throat, She has paid for me to belong to her for two weeks. I dont want to hurt the arrangementyou knowbybeing with you right under her nose. It might not begood for business. I was full of shit and I knew it. The truth is, I didnt want to hurt Bella by doing Victoria upstairs mere hours after I did her in my cage. And I didnt want to lie to her, either about it afterwards. And more plainly, I didnt want to fuck Victoria tonight. Victoria scoffed and smiled at me. I am dead. Edward, she spoke sweetly to me, Who is in charge? You are. I said with no disdain in my voice. Good., she frowned, Eleven. She left and I growled internally, going to my chair in front of my mirror and finally letting it out, Fuck. After I washed the makeup off and put on my red g-string I walked up to the red line and stood there, staring at it for a minute. I saw a flash of myself walking out of our apartment, leaving Tanya behind. If only there was a red line across that doorway. I wouldve stayed. But it was an

invisible, cruel line that I crossed, because of my stupid pride, that brought me here and now, would keep me here. I could never go back over it and erase my mistakes. I crossed the red line and became smiling, easy whore again, going up to the first table I reached. Across the club, I could faintly make out Bellas silhouette in the black and red shadows of the air as I felt hands clutch my ass and more than one pair of lips on my chest and back as I held the chair behind the woman I was grinding against. It used to be so easy to become the whore and forget my life and myselfI even used to like becoming this personality who had no pain and no family, no worries. Only now my mind was in pain. Crossing that line meant I was not a Daddy anymore, crossing that line meant I was not a husband anymore, crossing that line meant I wasnt Bellas man anymore. I found myself avoiding Bellas whole side of the room but my eyes kept finding her every so often, getting her brave smile, her concerned eyes if I was captured by a particularly horny or drunk table of women. I wished I could keep giving her orgasms from across the room, but in this outfit there was no way I could hide even that little controller. Several times I thought Id go to her table and dance for them but then decided against it. If Rosalie and Alice started groping me and touching me, that would be very hard for Bella to handle. So I let Emmett and Jasper have their table and the girls seemed to enjoy them very, very much. Except for Bella. She smiled and laughed at my friends as they flaunted themselves in her direction, but she just tipped them and blushed and allowed her friends to do the touching. The ladies I serviced seemed very pleased with me and I let them do anything they liked to me. Frankencock was still working, despite the conflicts battling in my head and that both relieved and disgusted me at the same time. God, I wish I was normal again. Please dont let me have that nightmare tonight, that recurring one where Im an old, wrinkled stripper and my grown up daughter is stuffing twenties in my gstringplease, Satantake a night off and spare me that one tonight. Finally, I was on a break and I snuck my way over to Bellas table. Hi girls!, I greeted with the utmost friendly voice, as if I didnt have a worry in the world. HI! a happy trio of voices sang back to me. Is it alright if I sit with you for a second? I asked, Im on a break. Sure. Rosalie and Alice went to move aside so I could sit next to them. Bella was smiling at me, but looked a little tired and tense to me. I wasnt surprised, though. I shouldve thought what this night would do to her. But I was just thinking of me, wanting her with me all the time now. I sat at the head of the table, beside Bella and Alice, hoping Rosalie took no offense. But I had flirted with Rosalie last week, right before Bellas eyes, and I didnt want to do that again now, even in the slightest way. Rosalie drew me in at the beginning because shes a Barbie doll. Fun, young, rich Daddy, no complications, no strings. Barbie dolls had lots of boyfriends and didnt

tend to become too attached to men like me. We were fun, naughty exercise. So I had flirted with her shamelessly, figuring she would want me privately. But then Bella shocked the hell out of me and ordered me for herself. At first I laughed. It was a rare person who could shock me. But then I thought, this could be very interesting, conquering the brainy notebook girl. And it amused me even more when I asked her to follow me and she nearly fainted. Her innocence sucked me right into her web. Howre you doing? I asked them all, Are you having a good time? Oh, God yes!, Rosalie gushed, not giving Alice a chance to speak yet, Edward, Edward.who is that guy? She pointed, smiling at Emmett, who was doing push ups on a table on top of an older woman. Thats Emmett. I informed pleasantly. Emmett? Rosalie and Alice both laughed at his unusual name. I grinned with them, then I looked at Bella. She was drinking out of her shot glass. Yep. I said and then Alice said she really liked Jasper, pointing him out to me. And then they thought the name Emmett was tame compared to Jasper. You want their numbers? I asked like a little devil, They dont have girlfriends. Both girls laughed with glee as I said, Give me a pen and paper. Normally, I wouldnt do this, but I couldnt see my buds being mad at me for hooking them up with two hot little girls. I wrote their names and numbers down quickly and handed it back to Alice. Now you guys have to do something for me., I raised a brow and Alice and Rosalie both turned into two deer caught in the headlights. What?, Rosalie asked, sparkling. Bella needs a girls day out tomorrow, shopping., I informed, Ill give you $2,000 dollars and I am hiring you two as personal shoppers. Sexy underwear, thongs, leather, lace, the works. Bellas body is Disneyland to me and I want to dress it up a little. Im on it!, Alice was thrilled to be my new employee and Rosalie looked happy, too. Bella turned red and smirked at me, finishing her drink. I couldnt stand it anymore and I snatched the glass out of her hand. And what are you drinking, little girl? I feigned playfulness, smelling it then tasting it, RUM? Is that what it is?, she smiled and leaned towards me, kissing me hard as her hands grabbed my cheeks. I kissed her back, closing my eyes but I didnt like tasting alcohol on Bellas lips. That wasnt her. Also, I didnt want her sick tomorrow. I wanted her at the mall, shopping for the day so I could go to my appointment without worrying about her.

Baby, please, please dont drink anymore, okay? I asked her, Why dont you let the girls take you home so you could sleep a little? Ill be along in a few hours. No!, she clung to my neck with her arms, I want to be with YOU. I have 9 more daysI want you She was holding me tighter and I looked over into Alices sad looking eyes. Please dont let her have anymore. I said, almost like a question to her, Ill get her a large coffee. Okay. Sorry, Edward. Alice cringed, feeling badly about this, This was very hard for her, you knowwatching you tonight. I know. Its my fault. I admitted, standing up as her arms slipped off of me, Ill be right back, Bella. Stay here, okay? Im getting you something better to drink. I went to the bar and asked Marie to give me a coffee. Quickly, I got through the crowds and placed it in front of Bella. She wasnt falling down drunk, but she was slightly intoxicated. Enough to say things she wouldnt normally say, to act on her impulses without thinking it throughand that was very dangerous, especially here. I sat there for a few minutes and I had her drink the coffee. She listened to me, kissing me and holding me very affectionately as I held her to me with one arm, talking to Rosalie and Alice about my friends who they seemed very interested in. I even suggested maybe theyd go to the mall with them tomorrow. They could help give their opinions on what the girls were buying for my Bella. The waiter, Bo, came over to the table and saw me there, asking if we wanted anything else. I ordered Bella another coffee and then Bo leaned in and said to me, Victorias waiting for you. In the Wet Room. She said youre late. FUCK! Well, its not like Im able to wear a watch around here. I was usually early for my meetings with Victoria. And no doubt she saw me down here holding Bella while I shouldve been working. I am so fucked. Can you take care of Bella for a little while? I asked, I have a meeting with my boss. Sure, Edward. Rosalie smiled at me. Ill be back, sweetie. I kissed Bellas lips and she let me go, stroking my face before I slipped away. Okay., Bella grinned at me as I hurried down the hallways that led to the private rooms. I knew the rooms by heart and got to the red door that said WET across it. I knocked and waited a second. Come in., Victorias voice said, not sounding thrilled. I opened the door and closed it right behind me. It had been awhile since Id been in this room. The lights were low and red and the white carpet was warm and luxuriously delicate under my bare feet and a few feet away the floor became three stairs that led down into a bubbling, steaming hot tub.

Victoria was there, drinking a glass of red wine and she placed it down at her side, looking at her watch on the floor outside of the tub. 11:13pm, she said with a malicious tone of voice. My face winced as if shed slapped me. Im sorry, Victoriathere was Have I ever made you wait for anything, Edward?, she asked, not looking at me, Maybe I should make the hospital wait for their next payment. And get around to it when I feel like it. Im sorry, Victoria, honestly, I didnt mean to make you wait. I tried to sound sorry, but it came out like pure begging. Take off your clothes and get in here., she still sounded highly pissed. I quickly pulled off the red g-string and let it hit the floor, climbing into the very hot bubbles. She was naked also but I already knew that she would be. Im sorry, Victoriaplease, I said, my eyes lifting to her stern, emotionless gaze, Please dont do that, with the hospital. Im sorry. I wont be late again. Shut up, Edward., she snapped. I sat there and waited, looking down at the water until she spoke again. I saw you with that girl, she informed, Kissing, hugginghelping her drink her little coffeeyou two make quite the cute couple. She had a little too much to drink, thats all., I made eye contact with her again and wished I hadnt. She looked very angry. You know you have Raven tomorrow, right?, Victoria reminded. Yes, Victoria., I answered, as if I could forget. Call me when youre done there. You should leave at 5pm., she informed, If I dont get a call from you, I will contact her. Thank you, Victoria., I kept my eyes away from hers. Lets hope I dont forget about you and make you wait., she threatened. Yes, Victoria., I said, leaving emotion out of my voice. Did that girl get my message earlier?, she asked. I believe so., I heard a little bitterness creep into my voice, It wasnt very hard to decode. Do you have a problem with me telling your little college girl the facts of life, Edward?, she smiled a bit. No, Victoria., I said, not meaning it. I think you do., she chuckled, I saw your face when I told you to kneel and again when I told you to stand up. You didnt like that one little bit, in front of your girlfriend, did you?

Shes not into all this, Victoria., I explained, Shes a normal girl. This slave stuff scares her. Slave stuff?, she asked loudly. Oh Jesus Christ, I am dead. This is not slave stuff, EDWARD!, she shouted, You are my slave! All the nights you knelt in that cage and did it with a smile and after five days with this GIRL you give me attitude! Im glad youre with Raven tomorrow, I told her to wear you out. You are in need of a little attitude adjustment. Yes, Victoria., I accepted this but what came next almost tore me up. I think youre done with that girl., she took a sip of her wine, You can tell her goodbye tonight. And when you leave Ravens, bring your ass back here because you have a few days of shit coming your way. Victoria, please dont do that!, I felt sick, Please, Ill do anything you say. She paid for two weeks, its not right to cancel now. And whats with that note you left on my desk, asking for next week off?, she asked, Is that a practical joke? We havent had a lot of time together, she goes to classes during the day, I thought, for the last few days, it would be nice to take her out a little., I answered honestly, knowing shed never go for it. Do you have feelings for this girl, Edward?, she sneered, her eyes cruel. No, no!, I lied, having to, Shes just a nice girl. She goes to college, I figured she could tell her friends about us and we could get more business. Lots of those girls have rich families. Leave the business shit to me, Edward., she said, You werent hired for your brains. I know, Victoria. She didnt talk for a long time but then said, Alright, Edward. You have been very good up til now, so heres the deal. You finish the rest of your time with this girl, you can have the week free with her. You will still see Raven tomorrow. But then, after its over with this Bella, there are no more young girls for you anymore. No more virgins, no more college trash. And I dont want to ever hear the name of Bella Swan again. I dont want you hanging out with her, calling her, nothing. And Ill know if you do. And Edward, if you try to sneak behind my back and see her anyway, I will call her father in Forks. I will inform her college of all this, and maybe one night she can see the dungeon downstairs. And if all else fails, maybe one night shell have a terrible accident. You know how many college girls overdose while theyre partying at a club like this? It happens all the time. Cops dont even yawn at that. No, dont., I almost got angry and then toned that right down, using my meeker voice, PleaseI dont feel anything for her, I told youshes just a job. I wont ever see her again after its done. I swear, Victoria. Well see, wont we?, she asked, We havent had a game of mermaid for awhile, have we? No, Victoria. I answered, glad at least for having the rest of my time with Bella.

I wasnt so thrilled that Victoria felt she needed to threaten Bella, but maybe she did see somehow when I was with Bella, how deeply my feelings ran for her. It had never happened before so this was my first time hearing threats out of my bosss mouth. But I kept my anger in check. I wouldnt let Bella cross paths with Victoria again and when the job was over, I would stay away from Bella. She didnt need me in her life and I didnt belong there. Sure, I would be sad for a long time after Bella was gone, but I would have Victorias week of punishment to cleanse me. I would never work with young girls again and that was alright with me. They would probably just remind me of Bella anyway. I didnt want any other young girls. Breathe underwater, my sweet little mermaid, she kissed my lips and grabbed my hair, forcing my head under the hot water, between her legs. They wrapped around my neck, holding me there underwater as I licked and nibbled and tried to hold my breath all at the same time. My body was laying down on my chest , my feet poking out of the water a bit behind me as I tried to use as little oxygen as possible. I held out as long as I could, and felt bubbles of air from my mouth rising past my eyes to the surface. But she wouldnt see them amongst all the other bubbles in the tub. I held very still, hopeful she would let me up soon as the last of my air ran out. Long ago, I used to kick and struggle in the water and that made her very angry. Moving harder uses up more oxygen. I nibbled her clit with the last of my air and a few seconds later, her hand grabbed my hair and jerked me up. I was coughing as soon as I gulped air and her mouth was all over mine, stealing the little gasps of air I was able to get. I moaned and fought to breathe as she shoved her tongue into my mouth and refused to let me have any air right now. My tongue tried to wrestle back against hers but I heard myself panting for release. Again., she said, shoving my head back under before I could recover from the first time and I wildly moved my tongue up and down her lips now, hoping to please her enough so shed let me breathe. This is play for Victoria, but the message is clear. She even controls my every breath and she likes breath play a lot. She loves hearing me choking for air, my hair soaking wet and over my eyes as she shoves my face back down. Most of all, she loves it when I cant take anymore and I start begging for her mercy. But that wont be for awhile now. I can hold out for about 30 minutes of this, off and on. If this would cheer her up and get her off Bellas case for tonight, that was fine with me. Later, after I was a heaving, panting, mindless thing, she told me to sit on the floor of the tub and she sat on top of me, riding me and dunking me at the same time. She would have me lay flat down under the water as she fucked me, her hands over my lower neck to prevent me from sitting up, then, when she would allow me air, shed curl her hands behind my neck, lifting me up and the depth of the water was just enough so if I looked straight up to the ceiling, my nose and mouth could find air a sliver above the bubbles.

I would choke and cough up little bits of water as she bounced up and down on me, and then I was shoved backwards once more. Who owns you, Edward?, she would ask when my face was out of the water, and I would respond, You do, Victoria. Another time, shed ask, Who do you answer to, Edward? Same answer, To you, Victoria. This went on the whole time she fucked me and at last, she was screaming and coming and so was I. Stay here for ten more minutes., she demanded as she stepped out and put a robe on, her hair still dry, Dont ever forget your place, Edward. If you dont please me, you know Raven would love to buy you as her own personal slave. Shes offered me millions of dollars, you know. She has a thing for you. I told her, Im not through with you yet. Maybe in a few years, when youre a bit older, and not so young anymoremaybe then she can have you. So you better remember how good you have it with me, Edward. Yes, Victoria. I panted a little, trying to catch my breath, kneeling on the tub floor as I was trained to. The thought of belonging to Raven 24/7 was enough to make my dick shrivel up. But I tried to wear a brave face. Have a nice weekend, Edward., she kissed her lips into the air at me, Come back ready to accept your punishment respectfully. Yes, Victoria., I answered before she slammed the door closed. BPOV I was starting to sober up a little after my second cup of coffee but my mouth was still saying things I didnt want it to. Where is Edward? I kept asking Rosalie and Alice as they helped me look around the club from our table. I had been asking this question for about a half hour now. I dont know. Alice didnt see him either, He said he had a meeting withhis boss. Rosalie frowned at me and said, Bellajust leave it alone. Hell be back when he gets back. Then I spotted Victoria coming across the club floor wearing a plush, white robe, and happily bouncing up the stairs to her office. BITCH! I leapt up, knowing full well what she was just doing and who she was doing it with. Victoria was already in her office with the door closed so she didnt hear me, but even my two friends couldnt make me sit down now. Bella, stop it!, Rosalie stood in front of me across the table, Youre going to start some shit here thats gonna get you hurt, do you want that?

I dont CARE!, I yelled, enraged, tears in my eyes, charging towards the stairs that led to Victorias office. BELLA NO!, Alice and Rosalie tried to grab me but they were useless against my new drunken temper tantrum. Get off me!! I screamed as I made my slow way up the stairs as they tried to block me and tackle me from behind. Go get EMMETT! I heard Alice scream and then I felt Rosalie let me go and run down the stairs. Finally, I was at the bitchs door and banging on it, yelling, LET ME IN, YOU FUCKING WHORE!! Oh my GOD!, Alice squealed, not abandoning me but not thrilled about seeing Victoria answer. I heard the wench laugh in there and she said cool as a cucumber, Come in. Okay, so shes not afraid of me. Thats not good. But I only had partial control over my mouth and it was like I could see myself talking and moving, and couldnt do much to stop it or say which way I wanted myself to go. I shoved the door open after turning the knob and she was sitting there, at her desk, in the robe, looking very relaxed and content. Oh, Bella., she smiled, Whats on your mind, dear? Dont dear me, bitch, I want your ASS!! my voice roared. Alice injected and stood in front of me, her hands up a bit, saying, She is very drunk, dont get offended by anything she says! Shes really very shy! She just had too much Rum tonight. Shut up, Alice! I shoved her aside, taking a step closer, I want you to stop treating Edward the way you do, I want you to let him go you DONT own him, no matter what youve made him believe, and I want you OUT OF HIS FUCKING LIFE!! I cant believe youd treat someone as special as him like a piece of shit the way you dobut I wont allow it, you SKAG!! And if I have to beat your ass, I will. Edward means something to me and I wont let you hurt him anymore! First of all, you are drunk., she grinned, not afraid at all, Second, I do own Edward, and if you dont believe me, I can call him in here right now to tell you so himself. I can tell him to look right at you and tell you that you mean nothing to him. I just stood there, seething, staring her down like a rabid dog. I want to tear her eyes out. He will come right in here and I can tell him to choose between you and I. And if you think he wont pick me, you are sadly fucking mistaken. If I tell him to, he will come in here, strip off his clothes and tell me how much he worships me most while fucking me right here in front of you. That should sober you up. She put her finger on her pager, saying, This is my button to Edward. Shall I call him, Bella?

Alice muttered to me, No, Bella. Lets just get out of here, please? All the fight and violence I had died instantly, just imagining that really happening made me want to throw upand I knew that Edward would choose her. Then I realized, it didnt matter if I kicked Victorias ass, although it would be sweet to experience it. Edward would have to be the one to free himself from her clutchesonly he could save himself. Thats where Dr. Bella comes in. I would have to do some work on him this week. She hit the button and a beep sounded. My face felt ice cold as Edwards voice answered, Yes, Victoria? Victoria raised a brow at me, waiting for my answer before she summoned him up here to humiliate me and him, too. Alice said, Bella, stop. Shes going to do it. Lets get out of here. Victoria?, Edwards voice asked, hearing Alice in the background. I was stupid and out of control and I knew tomorrow Id regret it, but YOU FUCKING BITCH!!!, I leapt over her desk and grabbed her witchy curled hair and pulled it. I was kneeling on the desktop and clawing my fists in the bitchs hair. BELLA!! NO!! I heard Edwards voice on the intercom and then nothing. I heard footsteps coming up the stairs and Victorias voice roaring out, mad as hell. Before I could really do anything to hurt Victoria, a large pair of arms scooped me up and laid me over his shoulder. I was kicking and screaming obscenities at her, trying to see her. She was holding a dagger in her hand now, something she got out of the desk right before whoever grabbed me removed me from her. I realized it was Emmett holding me as I struggled and Rosalie was yelling at Victoria to drop the fucking knife, who did she think she was?! NOOO!!, I could hear Edwards voice in the far distance, approaching up the stairs. Bring her over here, Emmett. Victoria stood, her sharp knife ready. Victoria, dont!, Emmett held a hand up, trying to keep the peace, Shes drunk, shes just a kid, what does she know about us? Im not gonna kill her. Victoria frowned, I just want to give her a nice scar across the face to remember me by. WOAH!! Edward flew in between Emmett and Victoria, my friends standing there at his side, too, What the hell is going on?! Alice informed Edward, Bella got nuts and went to kick Victorias ass and now Victoria wants to slice her across the face! Put me DOWN! I screamed, my rational side watching helplessly wished I would shut up. I had now stupidly put my friends, Emmett, and Edward all in danger against the psycho with the knife. Victoria Edward said, wearing no shirt and a pair of jeans, his hair damp, Ill take her out of here, please? Dont hurt her, Victoria. I wont stand by and let you do that. Ill have to stop you.

Fine., Victoria sneered, knowing Edward was being true to his word, And make it six days with me when you get back. Yes, Victoria. Thank you., he replied, turning to Emmett, Give her to me now. Okay, man, here. Emmett said gently, as Edward took me out of his arms and carried me quickly down the stairs, through the club and kicking the back door open, outside into the pouring rain. Then I heard Edward muttering as he walked, carrying me, Stupid, stupid, stupid!!! Is he actually angry at me?! Now I was fucking mad, too. Put me down! I screamed, Let go of ME!! I kicked and struggled enough that he let me down and I shoved him away, crying, glad the violent descending rain was soaking us and hiding my tears. Youre so fucking lucky that she let me take you out of there!! Edward was shouting at me, Are you INSANE, BELLA?! Do you KNOW WHAT SHE COULDVE DONE TO YOU?! She couldve KILLED YOU! Im not afraid of her, Im not her SLAVE!!, I shrieked back at him, I can say or do any damn thing I please!! I dont have to answer YES VICTORIA every time that bitch speaks!! I started walking away from him, not sure where I was even going or how the hell I was going to leave him behind. What do you WANT from ME?! Edward was following me, yelling over the rain, Dont YOU THINK I WANT TO SAY NO TO HER?! DO YOU THINK I LIKE KNEELING DOWN IN FRONT OF YOU WHEN SHE SAYS TO?! I DONT! I HATE IT! BUT THIS IS MY LIFE, BELLA!! I CANT CHANGE IT FOR YOU!! I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE, EDWARD!! I screamed, sobbing as I did, I dont want you here, I dont want you selling yourself to anyone!! I want you with me!! Please, just come with me and dont ever come back here again! Please, Im begging you, Edward!! Ill help you find a good job and you can stay with me, at my place! Anything is better than THIS! I grabbed his hands and pulled him with me but he wasnt following me, he was stuck firmly in place on the street. I cant, Bella! he shouted, louder than the rain, I want toGod, how I want tobut itll never work, Bella! Im not a broken doll you can fix!! Im not trying to fix you, EDWARD, I LOVE YOU!!, I shouted and the rational side of me fell over dead instantly. But the buzzed part of me stood her ground, frowning at him, unafraid of the outcome of my admission. He just stood there, like a porcelain statue with living eyes, soaked by the cold rain. I couldnt think of anything else to say, I just stood there, staring at him. His voice full of pain and torment, he said, I love you, too, Bella. I dont want to, but I do. But thats why it can never work out. Everything I love dies or fades away. Im cursed, Bella. And I told you not to love me. Itll just make the end harder for both of us.

Well, TOO BAD EDWARD! I sobbed, Because I do love you! And if that means Im cursed, too, then Im cursed!! I want to be cursed!! I want to be everything you are! And if it means I have to become Victorias slave, too, to be chained by your side, then Ill do it! You dont know what youre saying., he informed calmly, Youre drunk, Bella. No, Im not! I shouted, I know what Im saying. I love you! And then, a second later, I said it very softly, like a whisper as I saw him coming closer to me, nose to nose almost, I love you. The cold rain on my body was making me feel woozy and my head was dizzy, tooand then he kissed me, his cold, wet, rain lips moving against mine felt like a miracle to me and then the whole world seemed to tilt sideways. Ooops. Edward chuckled, catching me in his strong arms before I fell and he swept me up into his arms, bridal style, walking down the street with me, Gravity, thou are a heartless bitch Ive got you, fair Bella., he informed, his voice caring now, You crazy thing, you. Then he muttered to himself, amused, repeating my words, Chained together side by side. I am not drunk, I mean it, Edward! I said. Well, I hate to break it to you, but I dont think Victoria will buy you now he teased, You called her a fucking bitch and pulled her hair. Doms dont really like that type of behavior in their slaves. Oh, shut up Edward I whined, trying to smile, my head starting to ache. And also, youre not very quiet., Edward went on, Slaves must be quiet and not talk too much. Speak when spoken to, you ever heard of that? Enough, okay, I know I complained, then looked around as we were moving down the street, Where are we going? Home., he answered, And to bed. But, I thought you saidthe roof, I clearly sounded disappointed. Edwards loud booming laugh erupted instantly, You are just insatiable, arent you, Dr. Bella? What have I done to you?

15 BPOV I can still feel the icy rain pelting down over my breasts as my back arched all the way up, lines of water flowing backwards across my face as he thrust inside me again. As if on cue, the lightning raged, revealing the city to my eyes as the harsh thunder shouted at us, making its anger known at the path we were taking as we

fucked tirelessly on my rooftop, unashamed as I felt my clothes tearing off me by the brutally wicked hands of my dark, wet attacker. God, how many positions did we do? I still cant count them all, I only know that when he carried me downstairs over his shoulder to get back to our apartment, I didnt even care that I was stark naked and that someone might see me, even though it was about 4 in the morning when we finally got our fill of one another, at least for then. He took care of me, dried and dressed me in my nice comfortable t-shirt and flannel pajama pants and he wore the nightshirt I gave him, as always, with a pair of shorts. Snuggling under the covers, he held me this time, my face laying happily on his softly falling and rising chest. I wanted to tell him that I loved him again at that point, but by then I had sobered more and realized what problems now faced us, now that we had both said those three important words. Part of me was afraid to fall asleep because maybe in the morning hed be gone and some note would be waiting there for me, explaining the rules, and how hed broken them, too, by letting himself feel something for me in return, and how it could never be. But his touch is so gentle and soothing to my body, especially after the hours of pleasure it had endured, and I fell asleep anyway, feeling his lips on my hair. It only took me about four hours to jump awake, startled, shaking and afraid that my paranoid suspicions were correct. The sun was shining over the foot of my bed and I was glad to see four bumps under the blanket instead of just two. He is still here. My body relaxed and my breath exhaled in one long string. I thought he would be fast asleep but then his voice was floating right into my ear, Did you have a bad dream?, the godlike voice asked, sounding concerned. Funny, but I was wide awake nowand it sounded like he was too. He didnt sound tired or drowsy in the least. Without having the guts yet to look into his eyes, I flashed back over last nights many mistakes of mine: the drinking, the climb up Victorias stairs that forced me to run over my friends who were trying to stop me, the pounding on her door, the way I lunged onto her desk and grabbed her hairand the most stupid of all the I love you in the rain. How can I be tired when Ive fucked up this badly and need to do some serious groveling? No., my voice sounded like a little girls, Bad memories. His finger moved around and played along the bottom edges of my lower lip, still extremely loving and tender, even though he should be so pissed off at me right now. Go back to sleep, fair Bella., his voice was deep and lulled me, Its Saturday and you can sleep in today. Saturday Day 6. Only 8 more days left.I hate how fast time moves. Damn time. I made myself sit up and try to at least apologize for what Id done. I owed him that much.

Edward, I felt like crying but didnt let myself. He was laying there behind me but I still didnt have the strength to look at his face. And my heart was hurting because of it. He didnt say anything and that was scaring me too, but I forced myself to speak. I am so stupid, Edward., I began, stating the obvious, I got drunkand I never get drunkand VictoriaI was so mad at herjealous, I guess. I lost control of myself and I put all of us in danger. We couldve gotten hurtand because of me, you WILL definitely get hurt. Okay, now I was cryingI knew I wouldnt be able to hold out for long. He sat up and hugged his arms around me from behind and his lips touched a part of my bared shoulder. It was my fault., he said in a quiet voice beside my ear, I asked you to go with me, again, not thinking what it would do to you. I justI didnt want to be alone last nightfor once. It felt nice, for me, having someone. But I forgotI cant have anyone. You dont belong to me, Bella, as much as I want you to. I tensed up and let the tears fall and was about to argue with him but he held me tighter. Please, dontjustlisten, his voice pleaded, Dont turn around. I cant say it if I have to look into your eyes, Bella. I relaxed and didnt move. I made myself say, Go ahead, Edward. He exhaled a breath and said, I know what we said last night and I would never take it back, Bella. Its been forever since Ive wanted to say those words to someone, besides my daughter. But Here it comesI didnt want to, but a sob came out of my throat and I felt his lips kissing my neck and his perfect nose nuzzled against my hair until I calmed down and stopped. I could hear his voice, saying, Shhhshhh., and that helped me a little, but I knew the words were still going to come and crush me. I waited and his lips stopped kissing me. Then he continued. I want to love you, Bella., he said, But I cant. Its wrong for us to be in love with each other. Even if it is true. We have eight more days togetherand I want to be with you, Bella. But we cant say we love each other anymore. Its too cruelfor either of us to pretend that we have some kind of future together. We dont. Im sorry, Bella. I am so sorry. His voice was cracking in those last few sentences and my heart was breaking faster then I ever thought it could. I knew he would say something like this but I didnt think it would be so damn crippling to hear him saying it. You said there was no wrong for us., my voice whimpered as the tears fell from both my eyes. He didnt answer, but I was too afraid to listen to hear if he was crying, too. After a minute, Edwards voice sounded a bit stronger and he was still holding me. Today, youre going to have some fun with your friends., Edward said, Ive arranged that for you. Take the day to get away from me and refocus. Tonight,

Ill take you out to dinner and we can have a date. Then you can tell me if you want me to stay or not. Either way, I wont give you a hard time. Whatever you want, Bella, is what I want. You can just tell me yesor no. I wanted to have therapy with him right now but I didnt know if I could handle it at the moment. There are so many questions I have for him, so many things I wanted to knowbut at the same timeI didnt want to know. Is he right? Maybe I should just try to have fun with him for the next eight days, do my sessions with him, and let him go. Maybe I couldnt really love him after only 5 days. In Bridges of Madison County, they fell in love in less than 4 daysoh Christ, Im looking in movies now for helpgreat. If Im gonna go that route, I might as well watch Pretty Woman all over again and take some notes. I think Julia Roberts was far easier to rescue than Edward will be. All she had to do was kiss Richard Gere and get into his limo. I would have to take on She-Bitch Victoria, and Edwards parents, his list of psycho johns and if I made it through all that, then there was merely the pesky little problem of taking care of Edwards daughter, and I still was in the dark about that whole situation, too. All that aside, all Id have left to do then was deal with Edwards broken heart, his shattered self worth, his self loathing, not to mention all the memories of his past, trying to build a future and enjoying the present. Impossible. But I still love him. It looks like Edward and I have something in common. I like to punish myself, too. Now, Edward said, still holding me in front of him, moving us out of the bed until we were walking out of the bedroom and towards the bathroom, You will go get yourself locked in the bathroom again, like before, and I will come rescue you again. And well go from there, okay? I still hadnt seen his face yet when he gave me a little shove into the bathroom and closed the door behind me. If only I could go back in timeonly trouble isI loved him even back then, too. I tried to play along but my voice wasnt very convincing. Edward?, I called. Yes, Bella?, his voice was right outside the door. I need you., was all I could think to say and my voice cracked a little. I wasnt talking about the damn door, either. I know hes smart enough to hear that. A small pause went by and then his voice spoke, sounding deeper. Stand back, Bella., he said, all playfulness and joking gone from his voice. I was back, but not in the shower as the door swung open but didnt smash the wall this time. It was then that I saw his face and I wondered if mine looked as sad and void as his did.

Before I could even whimper or let the tears fall, he was there, holding me, whispering his Im sorry., to me again as I clung onto him. I just hated myself for being this way, wondering how many other girls let themselves fall for him this way. Im sure I wasnt the first to depress the crap out of him as he tried to keep things fun and free and light. Finally, as I rubbed my eyes, Edward tipped my face upwards to his and placed a wonderful deep kiss on my mouth. Lets eat., he suggested, trying to make his voice pleasant as he flung me over his shoulder, taking me to the kitchen and plopping me onto a stool as he began taking off the shirt I had given him, again, taking very good care of it, folding it ever so neatly first. How about a nice egg, bacon, and cheese sandwich on a bagel?, Edward had his happy face on again and I tried to do the same, Im sure, poorly. Okay., I shrugged. Edward looked at me as if he knew I wasnt so trained as he in the art of making believe but forgiving me for it as he poured me an orange juice and placed it in front of me. So, Edward began to get busy taking things out of the refrigerator, Maybe tonight, if you want me to stay, we can have therapy again? I want you to stay., I informed him right out first, Andyoure liking therapy now? This is the second time youve asked for it. I like your ideawith the blindfold and all, he took a sip of juice out of his own glass, It made me feel very free to talk. And, since you know most of my story already, I might as well tell you the rest. I really would like you to know. I believe you now, Bella. You really wouldstick by me. I saw that when we went to do the film. That really meant a lot to me, you know He broke a couple of eggs and shook his head at himself, as if hed said too much or the wrong thing to me but something else came to my mind now. Theres something I wanted to bring up to you, I smirked, And I dont even thing you realize itbutlast nightwhen Victoria wanted tocut me. Oh God, Bella., Edward turned to me, his face now stern, That reminds me, if you ever go near Victoria or Fire again, I swear, Im gonna go so Dom on your ass, you wont know what hit you. Promise, now, that you wont do it. I will promise not to go near Victoria again, hows that?, I offered. Your promises are no good, anyway., he joked, You also promised not to fall for me, and you broke that one. Anyway, I cut in, slightly irritated, Last night, you stood up to her. You said if she tried that, youd have to stop her. And she backed off. Did you see that? His face looked a little strange and I couldnt read his thoughts but then he said, I dont think she meant things to go that far. She might have grabbed the knife out of instinct. She keeps it there in case someone breaks in. Youre a client to her, she didnt really want to cut you, Bella. She was angry. I think I calmed her down.

Dont water this down, Edward., I argued as he cooked the eggs and bacon, his marvelous back facing me, The point is, you did stand up to her. And she didlisten to you. Dont you see how major that is? Yes, its very major., his voice sounded hollow, Im still her slave, you still have your faceits a miracle. Ugh, you are such a jerk sometimes!, I frowned at his back as he chuckled to himself, cooking, And thats another thing I want to address, too. This slave thing. You cant be her slave, Edward. Lincoln freed the slaves in the 1800s. Bellatheres a lot you dont know., Edward turned to me, making eye contact, But she doesown me. Theres a lot more to Victoria. Well, tell me about this., I drank some juice, You told me about the loan sharks and that Victoria paid them off, and that then she said she owned you. But that doesnt make it true, does it? Its more than that., Edward turned to me, putting a plate down in front of me with my sandwich on it, and then putting the same kind down across from me where he would be sitting, If it was just that I owed her, that would be different. I have already paid her back long ago for what she gave those loan shark guys, butthe night after I made thisdeal with her, these men came to the club, with Victoria. They made me go through this weird ritual thing and I thought it was some sexual game Victoria was playing with me. There is a contract I signed. They cut me and took some of my blood. It was weird but I did it. I just did it. That still doesnt mean anything Victorias family these men told me that if I tried leaving or starting anything, they could use my blood to connect me to any murder or rape they wanted. Victorias family is some big mob type family. I dont know why they care that I stay with Victoria, but they really seemed serious to me. They even threatened my daughter. So I am her slave. I cant go anywhere., he sounded so hopeless. Why would you agree to all this?, I was baffled. It was either that or die right then by the loan sharks., he sat down across from me now, picking up his sandwich and taking a bite, I wasnt in a good place to negotiate at the time. My daughter needs the money, Bella. My daughter needs lots of money. Thats why I stay with Victoria. Nothing else would keep me there. They knew what they were doing. They have me. I felt sick inside while he casually informed me of this and part of me said, forget it, its hopeless, but the other 99% of me decided to keep fighting for him, no matter how impossible it seemed. Why would these men do this?, I asked aloud, not understanding. I dont know., Edward shrugged, eating, Emmett isnt owned and neither is Jasper. Jasper is only a dancer, he doesnt have sex with the customers. But Emmett does. Hes not owned by Victoria, though, he can leave Fire is he wants to. As far as I know, Im the only one she owns outright. Edward, I sighed, taking a bite of my sandwich, You have really locked yourself into this world tight. But Im gonna find a way out for you. He smiled, almost laughing at me with a mouthful of food.

Oh, you are, are you?, he smirked. Yes I am., I informed, almost glaring at him, taking a bigger bite of my sandwich. Well that should keep you busy for the next eight days., he chuckled, swallowing, Half our days are still for bizarre sexual play, so you really have only four days, actually. I mean it, Edward., I frowned, Im your friend and Im going to find a way out for you. Bella his face turned very serious, Dont do anything. If anything happens and my daughter is hurtwe wont be friends anymore. Im not stupid, Edward., I said, trying to ignore his last few words and the fear they put in my heart, I would never do anything to put your daughter in any danger. I am just going to figure out the way to free you, thats all. And you cant stop me from doing that. Fine., Edward relaxed a bit, But dont contact Victoria for any reason. Im serious. I wont., I agreed, Hey, this sandwich is pretty damn good, Edward. Maybe you can be a short order cook. I was kidding and wanted to see him laugh or smile. And I got that. He laughed, shaking his head at me, muttering something about crazy. Hey, Im a college student. I can figure this out. Yea, right. By the time we were finished eating, I asked Edward what he was going to be doing today while I was gone. I have some cleaning to do at Fire today., he informed without blinking, No big deal, Ill be there alone all day but theres some painting that needs to be done, some other maintenance down below. In the dungeon?, I asked before thinking. Yes., he said with a grin, The equipment must be oiled and cared for. Is your room right in there with the dungeon? I probed further. His eyes squinted at me and then I added, Emmett saidyou have a room there. Its a nice room., he sounded a little defensive, And no, its apart from the dungeon, although I have slept many nights in the dungeon, if thats what you wanted to know. Edward, I closed my eyes and then looked into his face, If I find you a way out that works for you and your daughterwould you leave her? He smiled to himself and then to me. If by some miracle, anyone finds me a way out that works for my daughterthen, yes, I would leave., he confessed, then added, But, Bellathere is no way out. Ill let you try to figure it out if you like, butIve thought it over a billion different ways. And Ive concluded this. There is no way out. Period. Trust

me. Dont waste your time. Lets just enjoy our time together. Its not very often I get two weeks with an angel. Maybe Im selfish, but I want every second I can get with you. Because this is all we have. You understand? I nodded, not wanting to speak and hear my voice crack again. I was thinking of Bridge of Madison County again, when the four days was all they got together and she never heard from him again until the day he died and all his things came to her in a box. I could see myself, a 90 year old woman, taking the nightshirt that I bought him out of a cardboard box and dieing inside. I will take care of the dishes, he leaned forward, kissing my lips with a smile, And you will go take a shower and get ready to go shopping. I whined. I hate shopping. Go., he pointedand I went, reluctantly, not enjoying this.

EPOV Once I heard Bella in the shower I was safe to make my call. I closed my eyes, waiting while the phone rang twice and then it was picked up, and his voice answered, Hello? Hi Ben. I tried to sound pleasant, actually liking hearing the old mans voice. Edward!, he sounded glad to hear from me, Howre you doing, kid? Fine, fine., I said, bringing the pan from the stove to the sink, I didnt wake you guys up, did I? No, no, you kidding?, Ben scoffed, This little ball of energy gets up every day at the crack of dawn! I smiled, seeing her in my mind and laughed along with Ben for a second. Did you want to talk to her?, he asked. Not right now, Ben., I said, I just wanted to let you know that I wont be able to call at 3 today. I have an important meeting I cant get out of. Somaybe, later tonight or tomorrow? Hold on, Edward. Bens voice sounded more serious now and I heard a door close near him, as if he went into another room for privacy. Oh shit. Then he spoke again. Edwardwhat is going on, son? Ben asked with real concern in his voice, not judgement, Are you stillworking at that place? Yea, why? I asked, panic rising up in my voice, The hospitals still getting the payments, right? Oh, yes, Edward, yes, calm down., he assured, Everything is always paid for and you know I thank you more than I can say for thatbutI feel so sick about this, son. Dont work at that place anymore. Listen, Ill send you a ticket. You

come here and live with us. We will figure out another way. There are all kinds of loans or aid we can apply forand. No, Ben, I said and it killed me to say the words. I would love to go live where my daughter is but its too late now. I cant leave Victoria. Theyd hurt Katie and I would rather die than worry about that all the time. And Victoria knows exactly where Katie lives. Edward, listen, talk to me., he said, You call me Ben but Im your father, too. You and Katie are all the family we have left now. We dont want you there doing all that crap. Come home. Katie misses you, son. I couldnt listen to anymore of this. He was killing me. It would hurt less to have my skin torn from my bones. I have to go, okay, Ben?, I tried to keep my voice strong, Call you tomorrow. Bye. I hung up before I could even hear his voice again and tried to blink the stupid tears out of my eyes while I slammed the pans in the sink, trying to clear my head of the thoughts of my little girl missing me, crying. Thank God Bella takes long showers. By the time she was out of the bathroom I had shed a few tears and composed myself, all the dishes done and drying in the holder. I did my showering next, wishing I hadnt been so sad after talking to Ben earlier. I couldve snuck myself into Bellas shower and had some nice, clean fun. But then I thought back to last night, well, really, only a few hours ago on the roof, and thought maybe it was better to give her a break for awhile. I hated keeping a distance from Bella and so far, I really hadnt done it, but she said she loved me. I believe her, too. A giant part of me wanted to shout it from every rooftop and celebrate. But this made my problem worse. Its one thing if Im hurting, but now she will, too. Love is so cruel. And now she wants to somehow find me a way out of my life. Good luck. I hurt everyone who loves me. Tanya, Katie, now Bella. I should just let Raven have me already, thats where Im headed anyway. Maybe Ill get lucky one day and shell succeed in killing me. Sweet, peaceful death I was allowed to wear a t-shirt with my jeans when Bellas friends arrived. They both greeted me warmly and returned my hug when I let them inside. I slipped Rosalie the envelope that held their shopping money while Alice talked to Bella. Alice also gave Bella back her notebook from the club last night and informed her that she was never allowed to drink in public with them again. I was really starting to like Alice. Emmett and Jasper had agreed to meet them at the mall to hang out and shop for the day, and it seemed like a casual, laid back kind of get together for all of them. Even if they all just became friends for a couple days that would be nice, I thought. Its not often Emmett and Jasper get the chance to hang around with girls off the clock just for fun. I didnt get any angry calls from them for giving their numbers to the girls, so I guessed I was right. I wished I could go but I had torture penciled in for today.

It seemed Alice was going to drive them to the mall and they said theyd be back at around 7pm or so. Bella didnt like the sound of that, but she went along willingly anyway. Before they left, I asked if I could talk to Bella for one minute before they went. Rosalie and Alice just smirked at each other and went downstairs to wait in the car for her. Bella I began, holding her hands, I want to say something. Last night, I was very scared for you and said some things wrong. Im sorry I said you were stupid. Standing up for me like you did to Victoriait took a lot of courage and I know you did it because you care about me. You dont know how much that means to me, Bella, soI thank you for that. Dont ever do it again, but still, I thank you. She smiled and had misty eyes, answering, No problem. And Im sorry about before when I said if you did anything to get my daughter hurt we wouldnt be friends. That was a shitty thing to say. I just getvery nervous where she is concerned. Well always be friends, Bella. Even after our time together is over, Ill always count you in as my friend. I know you wouldnt do anything to hurt us. Thanks., she looked more misty eyed now and I smiled down at her perfect face. Are we okay? I asked. She gave a nod and smiled, wiping a tear away quickly. Yea, were okay. Im sorry., I cupped her face in my hands and kissed the wet spot where the tear had fallen, then touched my lips to every inch of her face, I dont want to make you cry. It seems like one of us are always crying. Well have to concentrate on having some fun in the next few days. Alright? This made her smile and she said, Alright. But Im still gonna find your way out. Okay., I smiled, admiring her perseverance, Im sure we can do both of those at once. Have fun and Ill see you tonight when you get back. Okay. Can I have a kiss?, I asked, nose to nose with her. She nodded and I smiled more, opening my lips and taking her delicious glossy mouth into mine, touching and closing, licking and tasting her. We clung to each other so tight during that kiss and although I couldnt say it, I knew I loved herwould always love her, even if I never got to see her again. I heard her voice whimper, as if she couldnt kiss me hard enough but wanted to. We werent even finished with the kiss yet and already it was powerful enough to help me face down what was coming up for me today. I needed strengthand now, I have it. I have love, even though I shouldnt have it. It felt like I just grew a very thick skin, just from the touch of her lips. Finally, she broke the kiss and nuzzled her little nose against mine as I stared at her, delirious as if Id just taken a drug. Get lots of kinky things., I slapped her hard on the ass, snapping her out of her haze as she screamed, rubbing her ass as I held the door open for her.

Bye, Evil. She nicknamed me, slowly moving out the door as I watched her. Bye, Rooftop Goddess., I smart cracked back, making her face turn bright purple. Hey, shhhh!, she slapped my arm playfully, walking to the stairs, laughing with me as she descended, then, finally, dropping out of sight. Now its time to see Raven. Shit.

**WARNING** THIS IS THE RAVEN SCENE ! IT MAY BE HARD FOR YOU TO READ, GOD KNOWS IT WAS VERY VERY HARD TO WRITE!! SORRY IN ADVANCE!!

When you arrive at Ravens mansion, you get to a gate first. Whenever I arrive, the gate is wide open, but Im sure when Ravens Daddy is here, its always closed and requires you to buzz and announce yourself in first. I drive in. Yes, for Ravens place you need your car. It is very remote and out in the center of the woods. Many times I had been used here outdoors and most likely would again today, as it was nice and warm now, but then maybe not. Raven liked me outside when the weather was chilly and cold, more suffering that way. I drove around the winding cement path that led around behind the west side of the house, passing the tennis courts and outdoor pools that were all vacant and empty. Whenever I was invited over, I never saw anyone else, except Ravens assistant/bodyguard. He was a former bouncer at some NY club and Raven took a liking to him and hired him. He liked to wear expensive Armani suits and covered up the muscles, spiky blonde hair, but a couple of times Raven would have him assist her in playing with me and then he was all shorts and muscles. He would never do anything homosexual with me, just do things like punch me in the stomach, hold my head underwater, lift or take me down from any position she wanted me in. He would always act like my friend, smiling at me and saying, sorry, shes the boss. His name is Dylan and that always made me laugh, remembering 90210. I parked in the usual place, behind the kitchen entrance. I put my car keys in my jeans pocket and approached the door. Always, before I even knocked on it, Dylan was there, opening it for me. Edward., he flashed a bright smile at me and I smiled back as he shook my hand, Nice to see you again. Come on in. Thanks Dylan., I kept the smile on but lessened it a bit as I entered the kitchen, hands behind me, waiting for my instructions. She wants to see you first, before going downstairs, as usual., Dylan informed as casually as if he were telling a plumber what to do, The usual pose, at the bottom of her bedroom stairs. I might see you later on, if she requires, but for the most part, its just you and her today.

Sometimes Raven lets her girlfriends play with me too, but not today it seems. I guessed today was kind of special since it had been six months since she last saw me. And also, since she nearly killed me last time she had her hands on me. Thanks Dylan., I said again, making eye contact with him as he gave a nod and walked out of the kitchen. I began taking off my shirt, laying it on the kitchen table, not bothering to fold it, then my sneakers, socks, jeans and underwear all joined my shirt on the table top. And I slowly walked out of the kitchen, down three hallways, knowing exactly where I was going. Finally, when I reached the rock hard ebony marble floor that laid at the bottom of a white carpeted staircase, I knelt on the unforgiving surface and closed my legs, my hands behind my back, my body erect and straight. Slouching or bending was not acceptable. But my eyes had to be on the floor. Eye contact was not allowed, unless ordered. I knelt there for quite awhile, not budging from my position, my face relaxed and expressionless, almost as if I were a thing, not a persona toy waiting to be used. I kept seeing flashes of my last time with Raven but I kept trying to block them, wishing I could erase those. Victoria said she would make sure at 5, if I wasnt out of here, shed call. But that was before Bella attacked her. And she did leave me here for three days last time, and she wasnt mad at me at all back then. I am so fucked. Her door was opening now and my body tensed then instantly relaxed. My body was smart enough to tense, my brain was overriding it, ordering it to loosen. I didnt really have to look up to see her in my head. Raven is a woman my own age, 28 maybe, very beautiful to the eye. Ivory, cream skin, long black hair she has never cut in her lifetime, bangs over her forehead, silky and shiny and usually braided tight reaching past her ass. Bright blue eyes, almost a turquoise color that was so unusual and attractive that she could surely catch and hold any mans eyes. Her lips were always dark red and glossy, full, pouting rose petals. Her body was very fit and toned, not overly muscular but strong and still feminine, attractive. She was never fully nude in front of me. There was usually an elaborate leather or rubber outfit she sported for our games. Today was no different. She was wearing a black leather corset, her naked breasts exposed above it, and a black leather collar tight around her neck with no rings on it, meaning she was not a slave, not owned. Over her crotch there was a little triangle of leather, a thong that left her ass exposed behind her, thigh high leather boots completing the whole dominatrix look. Slowly, she came down the carpeted steps, making no noise at all, holding a half filled glass of wine. Placing it on the round, flat banister at the bottom of the stairs, she had two free hands now as she greeted me. She was smiling at me and her hands slipped under both sides of my jaw and tilted my face upwards to her. I had fallen for this once before. I made eye contact when she did this and was severely punished for it. This time I closed my eyes as she moved my face up. Good boy., she purred affectionately as her fingers and thumbs stroked my forehead, cheeks, and lips.

I didnt answer. I was not given permission to speak yet. It is very strict with Raven. MmmmEdwardI have missed you so, her voice was deep but sincere sounding, No one suffers as sweetly as you. You look very beautiful, her voice said next, and I kept my face in place and eyes closed even though she let go and was moving around me now, looking me over. Even your ass looks more muscular than before, she commented, standing in front of me again, stroking her fingernail down the cleft of my chin, And you still remember my rulessuch a good boy. Open your eyes., she ordered and I obeyed, seeing her porcelain painted face above me. Oh God, she smiled, moving her fingers over my eyebrows, I forgot how gorgeous those wereso sad and innocentthe color is straight from the forests of eden. Did you miss me?, she slid her fingers into my hair as she added, You may reply without words. I nodded slowly, holding her eyes with mine. Then why dont you smile?, she moved her fingers over my mouth and added, You may. I smiled my best up at her, my hands still behind me as she smiled back down upon me. My sweet pet, she bent over, whispering, You may give. This means I may give her my love or affection, whatever she would call it. As if I hadnt been able to breathe without kissing her, I opened my lips and roughly assaulted her glossy mouth with mine, quickly using my tongue and letting a moan escape me as my hands stayed pinned behind me. I was like a dog of hers that hadnt been in her presence for a long time and was attacking her, love starved. This is how she likes it. She kissed me back for awhile and then finally moaned, Mmmmm., and broke away from me. I was never to stop unless ordered to so as she straightened, I kept kissing my mouth over her waist, on the leather corset with the same energy I had used on her lips. Stop., she shoved my face away and I cast my eyes downward again, slightly breathing heavily, quieting. She moved to the banister and picked up her wine glass, taking a tiny sip as she stared at me. Walking back up to me, she tapped my chin up with her finger and placed the glass to my lips, saying, Drink. I swallowed it down but then she took the glass away and tossed the remainder of the wine at my face.

Bad boy, look what you did., she smiled, And you got it on the floor, too. This is very expensive wine. Clean it up. I got down and licked the wine off the marble floor until it was completely gone. In a few moments, I was back up on my knees, hands behind me, eyes down. Speak., she demanded, moving around behind me. Im sorry, Raven. Please forgive me., I made my voice sound truly sorry, she didnt like me sounding like a robot. She liked the sounds of fear and sorrow and begging. Ill think about it., she grabbed my hair from behind me, But I know you dont want to be forgiven without being punished first, right? Yes, Raven., I answered with a soft voice. Sweet, delicious pet, she let go of my hair, saying, I have some new toys for you to play with. You remember the waycrawl. I got on all fours and crawled to her basement, hearing her heels clicking neatly behind me as I moved. Once down the stairs and in the dimly lit basement I knelt back in position and put my eyes on the cement floor as Raven came down the stairs behind me. Dylan was there, now wearing jeans and a t-shirt, preparing things around behind me as I waited patiently. I have many fun things planned for us today, Edward., she began, sounding pleased, But first Victoria made me promise two things. First was to make sure this time that you get plenty of water. I guess I didnt give you enough last time. So first, open your mouth. Dylan handed her something as I opened my mouth. Dylan secured my head back, holding his hand over my forehead as she inserted a little short tube into my mouth and pushed it back until it was almost touching the back of my throat. Involuntarily, I started to jerk and struggle a little, gagging as the tube did touch my throat. Shhh, shhh, shhhhrelaxright there is the spot, Dylan., she half said to me then to Dylan. The tube was hard and plastic and thin and pointed to the back of my tongue as I saw Raven began duct taping over my mouth, taping the tube in place as Dylan yanked my head back tighter. I closed my eyes and stopped struggling and about ten minutes later, my mouth was completely taped over and on the other end of the tube was a medium sized blue funnel. Good boy., Raven pet my hair as Dylan let go of me and stepped back, Lets try it out. She held the funnel up a few feet over my head and Dylan unscrewed a bottle of water, handing it to her as my eyes widened a little. Well try a little at first until you get used to it., she informed me, pouring some water into the funnel. The water came through the tube fast and before I knew it, water was in my throat and my eyes clenched, my throat refusing to swallow.

Swallow, Edward., Raven rubbed my throat and I swallowed against my will, choking a little, finding air. Youre going to have to practice with this., Raven said and poured more water into the funnel. By the eighth or ninth mouthful of water I had learned how to swallow it down this way, little by little, quick gulps, opening my throat, closing, opening, closing. It was awful and I couldnt breathe or even taste the water but I could endure it. It was like drowning and swallowing was the only way to get airand then Raven would pour more water in. After she had poured a couple bottles of water into me, she kept the funnel firmly in my mouth and announced, Second thing I promised Victoriakeep you cool. There had been some complaint last time that poor baby was too hot down here. Dylan moved a tarp off a long rectangular object and I saw it was a giant block of ice, ropes laying underneath it. Lay down, Edward., she ordered, On your back for now. I did as she said, the funnel over my head and hooked onto a chain that hung from the wall. As my ass and back touched the giant ice block I heard my muffled voice moan out in discomfort but that was ignored. Dylan and Raven stood on both sides of me and began to expertly bind my wrists with the ropes under the ice so that my entire arm was held against the cold, slick surface. You wont be hot today, I guarantee it., Raven commented as my body already began to shiver. My ankles were bound next and my knees bent my lower legs down against the ice where the block ended, but my feet didnt reach the floor. I heard youve been a bad boy, Edward., Raven looked down at me after I was helpless and trembling below her, Victoria told me to ride you hard today. I tried to make as little noise as possible but my breathing was troubled and my body wouldnt stop shaking. More water, Dylan., she said behind me and without unhooking the funnel, Dylan uncapped another bottle of water and began to pour a good amount into the plastic cup above my head. All I could say was, Mmm nnnnnffffff, before the water was in my throat again. This was even scarier and more impossible laying flat. During this, Raven was speaking to me. All this lovely flesh, she was stroking my chest and neck as I swallowed over and over again, hoping the next gulp would be air and not more water, never knowing how much more there was. Come on, Edward, cock up., she demanded and I winced, struggling to swallow all the water in my funnel and harden my dick at the same time. Thank God it hardened and I heard Raven down near the bottom of the ice cube, kneeling down.

Oh yes, look at that magnificent hard cock she complimented right before she took the entire length of it into her mouth, roughly sucking and yanking it in her hand, the other hand gripping my balls unforgivingly. Right then I got a breath of air and I let out a hard moan, my eyes peeking down at her as she licked and jerked and sucked with her own eyes closed, enjoying this. Then I felt the water in my throat again and almost choked, my eyes darting up and seeing Dylan pouring a lot more water into the funnel. Nnnnnnnn.. my voice protested as I swallowed again, a few drops at a time, praying for air and a break. After a few minutes, my cock was wet and rock solid and Raven told me she bought me a gift. This is a cock cage., she informed, showing me this long, metallic looking thing with lots of little thin bars, You ever seen one of these before? I had but I shook my head anyway. Dylan stopped with the water for now as my legs and arms quivered. I was filled with cold water and laying on a block of ice, this didnt feel very good at all. But I knew it was nothing yet, she hadnt even begun. Cock cages are very small and tight and basically encase your penis in this hard little restraint. When youre erect, its pure hell. So innocent, Raven shook her head at me as she opened the little cage and began to stuff my engorged penis into it as I started groaning and growling in pain, Poor little pup The contraption closed after an eternity and I screamed right out, my head pressed between little hard prongs as the rest of my shaft throbbed in their extremely tight prison as well. There you are, my sweet, she licked the head through the cage and made me scream again. Dylan, bring me my needles please., she said casually as my eyes closed, trying to mentally prepare myself for this. Raven loves needles. These were sterilized, three or four inch long needles with green plastic handles on the ends for the Dom to push on to properly drive the needle end in. My mind worked quickly, retrieving Tanyas face for me to look at. She was crying because of my cruel words and then I felt a sharp point poke the edge of my cocks head and slowly stab through until it poked out at the bottom of it. My voice roared out, growling as my chest rose and fell in agony. I wanted to scream Please, no more dont! But I couldnt do that. Not until I was allowed to begand that wouldnt be for some time yet. So brave, Raven took another needle from the holder Dylan was holding for her and pierced it down like the first one, in the ridge of my head, downwards, and out the bottom. I growled and panted, keeping my eyes clenched so I could keep Tanya in view while I hurt her over and over again in my thoughts. It made the needles easier to take, knowing every time I verbally stabbed Tanya, I was stabbed in return. This was just the start of the needles, and I knew it, as the third one stabbed into the head of my cock. Raven liked to pierce me all over chest, nipples, face, ass.

Once she sewed my lips together and Victoria got mad as hell because my lips were sore and useless for three days afterwards. Are you cool enough, my love?, Raven asked with a sugary sweet voice. I nodded vigorously and felt a needle poke itself into my balls until it was all the way in. This one didnt poke out the other side. My fists were clenching down at my sides as she continued, no more worried about me than a nail salon tech would be about the customer she was servicing. Raven moved slowly and took her time but it wasnt long before I had both chest nipples adorned by needles that went around in a circle there, my balls and cock thoroughly pierced through the spokes of the cock cage. Now she was sitting on my chest and I could feel her warm, naked ass on my cold skin as she held a new needle, now staring at my face. Enjoying yourself, Edward?, she smiled. I nodded. Have to piss yet? she asked next. I shook my head, not wanting to even think of how humiliating that would be. More water, Dylan., she said and I almost yelled out. Instead, my voice was moaning its protest and dislike as Dylan went to get another bottle of water. You wanted water, my love., Raven reminded me, replying to my sounds, and as the water poured into the funnel again, I felt the needle in Ravens hand prick me in the cheek.

LASH!! LASH!!!! SLAP!!! The single tail whip is a true bitch. I can take most whips but the single tail sucks. I was now on my knees on the ice block, hands above my head tied with rope, together. The funnel was taken out of my mouth for now and my stomach was painfully bloated with bottles of water sloshing around inside while I took my whipping. My back felt wet and sore and my ass was throbbing with the lashes slashed across it as well. Usually, I wasnt to be marked when I was working for another client at the same time but Im sure after Bella lunged at Victoria, she didnt care if Bella saw all the marks Id be taking home tonight. Perhaps it was a message from Victoria to Bella this is what happens when you fight me. Fuck, how am I going to explain this? Bella, I was attacked by a grizzly bear on the way home from Fire SMACK !!

I arched up a bit and let out a whimper, too weak at the moment to do any more screaming. Raven didnt gag me during whippings she wanted to hear me screamand I had. Now I was just sore meat, taking it without much fight. Turn around., she demanded and I let out a moan, turning towards her on my knees. Have to piss yet? she asked, looking at the needles in my flesh. I shook my head, lying. You cant hold it forever, pup., she smirked, And you better not have an accidentIll get very angry at you. She snapped the whip across my chest, decorating the front side of me now as I screamed out, panting and sweating as she attacked new flesh. Once my whipping was over, Raven told Dylan to wake me up. I was exhausted and weak and then I heard him turning a faucet behind me somewhere. The hosein a few seconds, cold water from a garden hose sprayed on my body from the front and I yelled out, the icy water making contact with the lashes and bruised skin, not to mention the painful sensation of holding my piss for so long. Dylan kept spraying me all over as I jerked in vein, stinging all over. After a few minutes, I was more aware of what was going on around me, more alert. And I had to piss badly. Raven, I spoke without being told to and hoped I wouldnt be punished too harshly for that. Dylan stopped the hose and Raven said, Yes, my pet? I closed my eyes and made my voice ask it. May I please piss?, I asked, hearing no laughter or mockery from either of them. Good boy., she said approvingly, Bring me your cock. I winced and turned myself towards her and she was coming towards me with a long plastic container. She took hold of my penis and placed it inside that and said, You may piss, sweetheart. I glanced up at Dylan and he wasnt watching, he was doing something with a little dog crate in the corner. I swallowed my pride and let myself piss, hating this part most of all. Raven wouldnt even let me piss like a person, using my own hand to hold myself. It was the ultimate humiliation. Very good, love., Raven said as I finished, taking the container away, You may give. She stood on top of the ice block where I was kneeling and bent down towards me again, letting my mouth kiss her savagely again until she stood up and moved away from me. My lips kept kissing her body where I could reach it and she was letting me this time, her fingernails playing in my hair.

I think baby needs a little rest., Raven said to Dylan as I ignored it and kept kissing Ravens inner thigh. Its been a couple hours., Dylan said with a friendly voice. Yes., Raven pointed her finger to her other inner thigh and I kissed that one completely next, not stopping. Come to bed, sweetheart., Raven said as Dylan cut the ropes from behind me, letting my arms fall down limply. Raven helped me down off the ice block and over to a black wooden box against the wall. She opened the front of the box and it opened like a door, showing a little goose down comforter on the floor of the box. This is my bed. Crawl over and lie down, baby., Raven stroked my hair again as I crawled over and laid on it, having to curl into a ball to fit inside the box. Good boy., Raven put her hand over my eyes, closing them, Take a little nap. She closed the front of the box, sealing me into a black wooden cube, a padlock snapped shut outside the box and then a tiny little circle window opened in the upper right corner of the box above my head. Fuck, my body hurts. Its shivering and I cant stop it. Its so cold. Calm down, breathe, close your eyes. Forget where you are. Youre with Bella now. Bella is holding me now. Were warm in her bed under the blankets. Yes. Good. Raven was being pretty nice today, maybe she was sorry for last time and was trying to make it up to me somehow. But then her mood could turn in a moment. And I had three more hours to go. At least.

16 EPOV I was runningmy boots dodging and leaping over fire hoses as I sprinted towards my apartment building. Even the cop who asked me to come with him was left in the dust behind me. Ive always been a fast runner. A boom sounded and the bottom of the building became invisible in the uprising flames. SIR, GET BACK HERE NOW!!, I heard a voice calling me from behind but I ignored it. Then, I hit a wall. Not an actual wall, a tall, burly fireman that wore a helmet, held a radio, and was standing beside a fire engine. He was an older man, but he was no weakling. I guessed he was a hardened Captain or something. And he was blocking me from my building. Hey, where are YOU goin?, he shouted at me as I struggled against him. Thats my building, I LIVE THERE!!, I tried to push him out of my way but two more younger firemen were helping the Captain block me now.

MY WHOLE FAMILY IS IN THERE!!, I screamed, TANYA!! Help this man and see if his family is with the survivors, please., the older fireman said to the younger ones. KATIE!!, I bellowed, two men forcing me backwards against my will, NO!! LET GO OF ME!! They rushed me away from the building and over to the grass across the road where some people in their pajamas stood, watching and crying. These are all the survivors we got out so far, Sir, do you see your family?, the fireman asked me as my legs began to tremble. No., I felt tears rise up in my eyes, walking back over to the burning building. Alright, let me just tell you, the fireman said to me over the roar of the noise, the fire began at around 3am a lot of people were asleep when it broke out. We have ten men inside looking for survivors. What floor do you live on? Ninth., I shouted out clearly, feeling tears falling down my face as I blinked, My wife and daughter Stay calm, Sir, hold on., the fireman clicked on his radio and said, Ladder 12, Ladder 12, what floor are you on? Sixth floor., a quick voice came back. The fireman with me clicked on and said, Ninth floor, female adult, female child. What apartment, Sir? 9B. I kept watching the building, counting floors with my eyes, the ninth floor looked untouched by the fire at the moment, at least to me from here. 9B., the fireman said into his radio, Apartment 9B. Copy that., a male voice said, then nothing. I cant sit here, I have to get in there., I leapt up and began to walk towards the building again, but again was stopped by more than one fireman. I know where they ARE!, I shouted, I can show you, come on!! Sir!, another fireman shouted at me, The first five floors of your building are on fire. Every so often another explosion. You are not going in there, under ANY circumstances. Well, cant we get a ladder or something to get up there to help people?!, I asked, getting grave stares back from them. We know what were doing, Sir, just please., the fireman said to me, I have kids, I know what youre going through, but Are your kids trapped in a burning building?! I screamed, completely enraged at the man suddenly, MY WHOLE LIFE IS IN THERE AND YOU TELL ME TO CALM DOWN?!! I know, Sir, I know, the fireman was trying to be understanding but he wasnt doing me any good.

Oh, fuck!, I woke up and grabbed my cell phone out of my jacket pocket, dialing my home number, Why didnt I think to callthey might be asleep, but if the phone rings, theyll wake up. Good idea., a fireman said to me and I let it ring until the machine went on. It was my voice, saying, You have reached Edward, Tanya And then Katies voice came on and added, AND KATIE CULLEN!! My eyes closed and I trembled, feeling warm tears trailing down my face as it seemed to take an eternity for the machine to pick up. Then my voice was chuckling and said, Please leave us a message and well call you right back. Then I yelled with all my might. TANYA, WAKE UP AND PICK UP NOW!!, I screamed like a maniac, THE BUILDINGS ON FIRE, WAKE UP, TANYA, NOW!! KATIE!! SOMEONE, PLEASE WAKE UP AND ANSWER NOW!! The machine cut me off and I hung up, dialing it again and screaming into my phone like a crazed person three more times. I was almost crying, wondering if the smoke had already killed them in their beds when, as I was screaming, I heard a click and my voice halted in its tracks. Daddy? a little groggy voice answered and I grabbed the fireman next to me, letting him know I got an answer. Baby, yea, its Daddy., I almost sobbed, Wheres Mommy? Asleep, I think., she said, Are you mad? No, baby, Im not mad. I love you, Im never mad at you I was sobbing now, trying to hide it, Go wake Mommy up but dont hang up the phone, okay? Okay Daddy, hold on., she said and trailed off as I said to the fireman next to me, My family is alive in there, GET THEM OUT NOW!! He ran off to alert his superior and they were talking on their radios. Katie!, I couldnt wait anymore, I hated not hearing her now, KATIE! Edward a womans voice was calling me as my eyes began to open a bit. It was dark and I heard my voice breathe, Tanya? Focusing more, I blinked a couple times and remembered where I was. Curled up in my box with only one little circle above giving me light and air. Bad boy Ravens voice scolded from the circle, First you say Katienow Tanyayou have so many other women on your mind. Youre supposed to be focused on me now, you little slut. Shit. My hands were shaking as a bigger window opened in the box, a very large circle, letting a bit of light in as Ravens face stared back at mine.

Put your head through., she ordered and I carefully did as she said, finding there was just enough room for my head to stick outside the box, leaving the rest of my body inside it. Tongue., she said without emotion. I stuck my tongue out, my fists clenching inside the box as she opened a clothespin, letting it clasp onto my tongue. Thats Tanya., she said playfully, then put another one on my tongue, adding, And thats Katie. She stood up and walked away, letting me suffer there alone for awhile. It wasnt really that bad of a punishment, actually. I thought she was going to stick my tongue with the needles. Glad I was wrong about that. I tried to look around to see what they were planning to do with me next but from this hole my head was stuck in, I could only see the floor. My body was kneeling in the box, bent over, my hands on the floor of the box. I tried to think of Bella in the mall with Rosalie and Alice, looking at lingerie and that made me smile a little. I cant wait to see what she brings home. Maybe Ill have her model it for me.

BPOV No, Im not going to model it for you., I laughed at Emmett and Jaspers suggestion in the middle of Victorias Secret. They were laughing, too, and I knew they were kidding, but my face still felt red hot just the same. Edward will love that., Jasper raised a brow, looking at it on the hanger, holding it up to me, trying to get a visual, He loves crotchless, trust me. Stop!, I yanked it out of his hand, walking towards the dressing rooms as Alice and Rosalie waited for me over there. These boys are bad!, I informed my friends as I closed myself into the pretty dressing room, hating the mirrors inside while I undressed. I knew the girls were outside the room, waiting to see what I was trying on so I announced, I think Im gonna head home after this store. I dont think so, Bella., Alice quickly came back with, Weve been hired as personal shoppers and were not done yet. Sorry. I just have a lot of work to do today., I grumbled, stepping into a black lace body stocking, moving it carefully up my legs as I sat on the silk little bench behind me, Edwards not there so its a good chance to go over all my tapes and make good notes. You have three more days off to do that now hush., Rosalie sighed.

EPOV

Hush!, Ravens voice shouted as my voice cried out again, my face wet with tears I couldnt hold in, Its all over, sweetness My feet kicked out of reflex as the dangled a few feet off the floor, bound with black leather cuffs that jingled with any movement. My chest was spider webbed with intricate knots and white ropes that expertly came together at my back and hung from a metal hook overhead. My arms were folded behind my back and cleverly bound with lots of rope that held them in place above my spine and another rope went from the back of my collar to the hook to hold my neck and support it so it wouldnt just dangle painfully. I was suspended in the air, legs apart, facing down, at eye level with Raven as she stood before me. Its all over., she kissed my lips that trembled, Dont cry anymore, my pet. Im done playing with you from behind. She dropped the last toy into the large plastic box at her feet and gave a nod to Dylan. Sterilize all those toys, Dylan., she smirked at him, Were finished with them for now. Yes, Raven., he picked up the box and left the basement. I was trying to compose myself but at the moment I was in bad shape. My body couldnt stop violently trembling and the tears wouldnt stop leaking out of my eyes as I panted, deeply pained. I hate being raped. Shhh, shhh, shhh, Raven kissed my face all over and I wanted to cringe and yank my face away, but I didnt. That was very hard for you, I knowbut you took it very well, my pet. Youre very strong., she complimented. A sob forced its way out of my throat against my will but Raven was loving this. She loved breaking men and she enjoyed breaking me most of all, God knows why. Why are these sick women so attracted to me? Awwww, she played with my tears, drawing a heart on my cheek as I tried to slow my breathing, Let me feed you, my pet. Thatll make you feel better. She left the basement as I hung there, my arms killing me, my chest sore from the many tight ropes holding me afloat, my legs uselessly open and limp behind me. All I could think was I want to go home. I want Bella. It was dim in here and there was no way to tell what time it was. It had to be getting lateI should be out of here soon. I once asked her what time it was during a session and HELL Ill never do that again. She liked to believe that I was enjoying my time with her and never wanted to leave. Soon, she was coming back down the basement stairs with a plate full of shrimp, not breaded but cool and wet, as she preferred it. This is nice and light for your stomach, Edward., she smiled at me, peeling the shell off a few of them. My breathing was more under my control now and I tried to forget the pain as she brought the first shrimp to my lips.

Lick., she smiled. I licked around the white shrimp, tasting its sweet juice but not daring to bite until she allowed me to. She was also testing me today, to make sure I remembered all her rules. I guessed so far I was doing pretty well. Good boy., she talked to me like a dog, Eat. I gently took the shrimp into my mouth and chewed it without a word, glad for any rewards I could get, especially after the last hour I just went through. Good?, she asked me and I nodded. The food was always top quality here, just like the pain. I swallowed, still not allowed to speak yet as she brought me over another shrimp, saying, Eat. Dylan came in with a large bucket of water, a huge yellow bath sponge floating on top. He walked around behind me and I heard water sloshing. My body tensed as my eyes moved sideways, wondering what was going on in my blind spot. Relax, love, Raven put another shrimp to my mouth and said, Eat. I took the shrimp into my teeth and Raven said, The water is nice and hot. Dylans going to give you a nice washing, thats all. I winced at that and Raven laughed at my expression. I dont think my pet likes another man washing his body., Raven kissed my cheek as the wet hot sponge was squeezed above my lower spine, a delightful steamy cascade of soapy water poured generously over my flesh, running down over my buttocks, and it felt so fucking good that I couldnt even hold in the moan that came out of me. My pet is spoiled, isnt he?, she said to me as I felt the sponge moving up and down the backs of my legs. My eyes widened a bit and I shook my head. You want me and only me to do everything for you, dont you, pet?, she gave me another shrimp, adding, Eat. I cant feed you and wash you at the same time, can I? I shook my head, praying she wasnt getting mad. And you do want to be nice and clean, dont you?, she asked as I nodded. So behave and let Dylan wash you., she suggested, Believe me, he gets no pleasure out of it. He does what hes told and so will you. Eat.

BPOV Eat., Alice said to me as we sat in the food court, surrounded by bags, a slice of pizza staring up at me. Im not that hungry., I admitted, I dont feel right. Im not sickbut I justdont feel right. Can you drive me home?

Emmett and Jasper were talking to each other a couple feet away, in hushed voices, sitting at the table with us. What are you two whispering about? Rosalie asked them before I could. Nothing., Emmett smiled wide, like a kid caught stealing cookies, Guy talk. Nosey woman! Rosalie play hit him and Jasper grinned at me weakly, making me even more nervous. Whats the matter, Jasper? I asked, half smiling. Nothing, Bella., he shrugged, looking at his watch, Just thatEmmett and I are working tonight and we should get back. Its after 5. Oh, okay. I jumped up, glad to see this mall day end so I could get home and get to some work before Edward got back. I started picking up bags and so did Alice and in a minute we were walking towards the exit doors. I saw Emmett walking way ahead of us, on his cell phone, muttering quietly but still sounding pissed off. He clicked his phone closed and became playful again, in a second, and that reminded me of Edward. I guess I was really no fun today because I was missing him so much. This felt like a wasted day that I couldve had with him and even though I knew Edward said it was good for us to have a break from each other so I could think, I still hated being without him. We cant say I love you to each other anymore. That is just depressing the hell out of me, too. We admitted our feelings for each other, but Edward had spoken what I feared was true. It didnt change anything. He still had to leave in 8 days. I said I was going to find a way out for him. I cant even solve a rubiks cube. Jesus, what am I going to do when our time is over if I cant live without him for one afternoon? Alice dropped me off at my apartment and I went in alone, not really wanting any company tonight. Emmett and Jasper had come in one car to the mall together, so they quickly drove off after thanking us for a nice day. I suspected maybe they were late for work or something, they looked very tense and strange. I told them to say hi to Edward for me at the club and they again looked fake and smiled and said, Sure thing, Bella. See ya. Something isnt right with them. Maybe its a stripper thing. Maybe they didnt like Alice or Rosalie. Nah. We all had a fun day. Unless they were acting, like Edward does on his jobs. Rosalie and Alice knew me well enough by now that when I wanted to be alone, I was best left alone, so they respected that. The first thing I did, after tossing my bags onto my bed, was vacuum. The apartment was very neat and Edward did a fantastic job keeping it clean but when I get in this mood, I like to vacuum. I have no idea why, but it relaxes me.

So for ten minutes, I just stared at the vacuum as I moved it back and forthback and forthit lulls mein a way. I thought about Edward alone at Fire, cleaning and painting. Maybe hed get hot and have to take his shirt off. Oh, Bella, you are pathetic. Stop it. I glanced at the clock in the kitchen and it said 5:35pm. I shouldve eaten lunch. Now Ill be starving by the time Edward comes home to take me on our date. A buzzing sound was coming from the vacuum cleaner and I noticed it was right against the counter bottom. I sighed and turned off the machine and pulled it backwards, feeling under it to see what got stuck in there. I yanked out a long paper and saw an envelope. Oh, my letter from Charlie a couple days ago. A flash came to mind, remembering my apartment rapist taking the mail out of my hand and tossing it over the counter. Oh, and theres my Lillian Vernon catalog too! They mustve fallen under the counter and I had forgotten all about them. I smoothed out the envelope and smiled at my Dads handwriting. Whenever I was in the dumps, my Dad would find a way to talk to me. He strikes again. Before I knew it, I was sitting on the sofa and opening the letter, wanting to hear about what was going on with him and hoping to forget my own problems for awhile. I sat back and read: Hey Bells ! Im sitting here at my desk, at 2:30am, bored out of my mind. Im glad I live in a peaceful town, but sometimes I would love some action. Im not just writing to you because Im bored, either, so dont think that. Youre my girl and I always want to know how you are. So, how are you? Hows college life? How are your grades? I hate how this letter sounds so far. It sounds like an interrogation, not a letter from a dad to his daughter. Sorry, Bells. Billy and I went fishing last weekend and you wont believe how many we caught. When you were little, we used to fish, remember? And we hardly caught anything. Oh, by the way, Im enclosing that background check you asked for on that Cullen guy thats dating Rosalie, if theyre still dating, I know how fast Rosalie goes through boyfriends. You wanted to know about crimes and there was nothing there but then I checked other things. You can decide whether or not to tell Rosalie, but this poor guy is a widower, at the age of 26. Yikes. And he has a daughter, too. But for some reason she doesnt live with him. She lives with his wifes parents in Jacksonville, Florida. Ben and Angela Cheney. What a shame. There was an apartment fire. The little girl survived but not the mother. Tell Rosalie this might be too intense of a relationship for her.

I put Charlies letter aside and went to the other papers he had mailed. I had wanted Edward to tell me about this himself but I couldnt stop reading what I had before me. There was a copy of an article about the fire. Edwards name and face was kept out of it but the title read, Fireman dies saving little girl. I read the whole article three times with tears in my eyes. It didnt give lots of detail but it seems the bottom few floors were on fire and a rooftop rescue was attempted when the father of this little girl called her on the phone from his cell and she answered it. The father and the firemen talked to the girl while firemen got to the roof of the building, leaping onto it from the building alongside it. Then they harnessed a fireman and slowly lowered him down to the fire escape outside the little girls apartment. The fireman could see the little girl inside but she didnt know how to unlock the window to get out there. The father was telling her what to do but there was a problem with the window being stuck or something, according to the other firemen who were in contact with the one on the fire escape. I ached, thinking of Edward on his cell phone trying to tell his daughter what to do to get out of there as the building burned before his eyes. The fireman was about to tell the girl to stand back and hed break the window but then tragedy struck. Thats when the first signs of fire appeared and the floor was burning, starting to cave in from the fire below it. The fireman crashed through the window and had the little girl in his arms and were about to start being pulled up back to the roof when another explosion happened, setting both the fireman and the little girl aflame. The firemen on the roof kept pulling them up and the fireman never let go of the little girl, even though the harness rope nearly burned through before theyreached the rooftop. When they got there, the fireman was dead, the little girl alive but severely burned. Oh God, I pray that Edward couldnt hear their screams on the phone or the radiosJesus, he probably did. I kept imagining the whole thing, hearing Edward screaming and I was crying, sobbing from the pictures in my head. Edward, I love youbut I have no idea how to help you. I have to recommend someone else to be his doctor. It cant be me. Im not good enough and he deserves the very best. I took a deep breath and wiped my eyes, rewinding my tape and picking up my notebook, going to a clean page, about to write about this new information. I stopped it and heard Edwards voice moaning and growling as my own voice gasped out, the sounds of flesh slamming into the counter over and over again. The old me wouldve been terrified and hurriedly stopped the tapebut I had already changed in the last few days.

I wanted to hear itand I wasnt ashamed. I was making love to the man of my dreams and it wasnt dirty at all to me. Especially wonderful were Edwards sounds and breaths, even as we finished and came down from our blissful interlude, I could hear his mouth kissing my back. Sitting back in the sofa, I hugged my arms around myself and closed my eyes, rememberingdreaminglonging. Bella, his voice whispered to me from the tape as his mouth made more sweet kissing sounds on my body. I could hear my own ragged breathing very faintly. After that, I listened until I heard my own voice a few minutes later gasping and saying, The tape player is still on. And then nothing a hard click sound. I stared out the window, knowing that was our last session on tape and then I heard Edwards voice saying, Edward session five. Bellathis is me. Hopefully, you wont hear this until after Ive gonesoI can say anything I want to say I sat up, frowning but riveted. He cleared his throat and said, I want to thank youfor caring about me. I know now that you do. I hopeI KNOWthat youll be a wonderful psychiatrist someday. You have the gift. Not that I would know, youre the only shrink Ive ever talked to, butI can see in your eyes how much you care. Im sorry Im so difficult for youtoo hard to reach. But you tried your best. I am thankful for that. He paused then said, So heres what I can never tell you to your face, Dr. Bella. I deserved to lose my wife. I deserved to lose my baby. I wasnt good enough for them and I left them when they needed me most. I let them burn. His voice was crying and it was killing me to listen to this and not have him here to hold him. Was I asleep when he recorded this? GOD! A glass of milk and $27.00, he wept quietly, Thats what drove me out of my house that night. God, I am nothing, Bella, NOTHING! Cant you see that yet? I should have died that night. I DID die that night. We never should have even met if things were the way they should be. Im sorry that you had to get mixed up with me. Im sorry. Im not good enough for you, eitherand I never could be. Please justforget me. Pretend it was all some dream or something. He sniffed and took a couple of breaths and said, Be safe and be happy. Those are two things you could never be with me. Im sorry if I ever hurt you, Bella. I didnt want to. It was very amazingbeing part of your life for awhile. Thank youfor trying to fix me. Goodbye. Tears rolling down my cheeks, I heard the click where Edward stopped recording and I stood up, going to my purse for my cell phone. I scrolled to Edwards name and hit it. It rang nearby and I followed the musical ring tone to his duffel bag, grabbing it and putting it on the bed. I pulled everything out of the bag before I even looked closely at it. Then I had Edwards cell phone, a cop uniform, handcuffs, a gun that wasnt loaded and some t-shirts and jeansand a little notebook. I didnt care about his privacy anymore, I was afraid for him. Afraid he might try to hurt himself, not sure when he actually taped this.

Opening his notebook, I flipped through to a blank page then went back one page. Saturday 12pm Raven. I remember him mentioning Raven Wanna hear some scary stories? I can tell you about Raven. Painting at the club, huh?, I was shaking as I scrolled down from Edwards name to Emmetts, hitting his name to call next, You little liar. I looked at the clock and now it was about 6:45pm. Bella, whats up, girl?, he answered with a very happy sounding voice. Emmett, where is Edward? I got right to it, not in the mood to be lied to at the moment. Ummm, hes downstairs., Emmett said. Youre lying. I said sternly. How do you know? Emmett asked, not admitting anything. Im a psychiatrist, thats how I know., I shot back, Dont lie to me, I want to know where he is now. Bella, thats his business., Emmett said, his tone serious now, If you want to know, ask him. Emmett, Im worried about him!, I let my panicked voice out now, I need to know hes okay, I found his book and it says Raven today at 12 and he said hed be home around 7. Emmett, thats seven hours! He told me that she likes hurting him! Alright, Bella, hold on., he sounded like he was moving and maybe going out to the back alley of the club, Okay, I can talk now. Listen, this is what I know. He shouldve left Ravens place at 5. He hasnt called Victoria yet to check in so that means hes still there. I called Victoria from the mall at 5 to see if he got out but she said no. Ive been waiting to hear from him but so far, nothing. And Victoria said she wont call after Edward until tomorrow. She says hes beingpunished. Because of what I did to her last night!, I finished, tears of rage in my eyes. Yea., he sounded so sad. Bitch!, I spat out, pacing the floor as my eye caught the police uniform on my bed. Give me the address., I ordered Emmett, grabbing a pen and going to my kitchen.

EPOV Raven held the chains over her head and used them to rise herself up and down as she fucked me again. I was laying on a wooden table and she was on top of me, impaled on my cock as my hands balled into fists at my sides, my wrists

cuffed to a leather strap fastened around my hips, my ankles cuffed in leather also, together, a chain going from those cuffs up to the ceiling. Screaming out hard, she was coming. I closed my eyes and willed myself to forget the pain and let myself orgasm, too, before punishment was delivered upon me again. I panted harder, thrusting my pelvis up and down until I was about to come. Raven, may I please come?, I asked as instructed. Not yet., she kept bouncing mercilessly on me as I groaned, clenching my eyes, trying to hold it back. After a few seconds, I could feel it about to explode out of me and I heard myself whimpering, Pleaseplease.. Now., she said, allowing me as I screamed, my body jerking as I ejaculated into the condom I was wearing. A few moments went by before she moved and spoke to me again. Mmmm, my good little fucker., she stroked my face as my eyes half opened, Thats the tenth time in a row. You are special. She kissed my chest and began to move herself up off of me and commented, See, this is why I want you all for my own. But Victoria wants me to wait a bit. So Ill wait. I want youand Im going to have you. Would you like to belong to me, pet, full time? Yes, Raven., I closed my eyes and breathed, feeling too weak to even talk very well. I knew it., Raven sounded morose, She is keeping us apart. So tired, I half mumbled as Raven came back over to me, removing my condom and cleaning me with the sponge and new hot water. She ignored my babbling and said, I hate releasing you. I just cant ever seem to do it. Its likeyoure meant to be mine. You are mine. Raven, I breathed, PleaseIll come back, I swear. But if you dont release me when its time, Victoria will send someone here. She hasnt called yet and its after 8., Raven informed, She doesnt really care about you like I do. Just stay with me. Her lips kissed mine and I tried to kiss back but I was so weak, so worn out. This is where Raven and I always have our problem. When its time to let me go, she doesnt want to. Eventually, as I tell her its time to let me go, she takes her anger out on me. This is how things escalated last time. So I decided not to press too hard this time on her letting me go. Maybe shed get bored of me in a couple more hours and release me on her own. Youll like it here with me., she kissed my chin and went over to a handle in a wooden post to my left near the upper part of the wall.

She turned it and I heard chain slowly grinding. I peeked down and started feeling the chain connected to my ankles tighten and begin to raise my feet up off the table a bit. Raven, I looked at her a bit nervously as she kept turning the handle, making the chains completely lift my legs off the table now until only my shoulder blades and head were on the surface. Raven stopped turning the lever and easily moved the table out from under me, allowing me to fall back until I now hung upside down, hands still pinned at my sides. Her lips met my stomach and she kissed me there, saying, Sleep, my angel. She sat on the floor under me and a couple feet back, smiling at my face and humming a song to me, like a lullaby, to sing me to sleep. I shuddered, knowing anything I wanted to say now would just provoke her. I was going to have to play nice and be quiet until Victoria decided to let me out of this. Bella is going to be so worried about me. Shit. Emmett will take care of her. Closing my eyes, I pretended to fall asleep as she sang her eerie little melody. Later, after Dylan had convinced Raven that letting me hang upside down would kill me eventually, I was placed in a small cage, very like a giant bird cage, my legs dangling out of the slats as my body leaned back against the iron posts, my eyes trying to close in some form of half sleep as my cage dangled from the ceiling, my arms wrapped around my body, trying for a bit of warmth. I was still naked but a lot more comfortable than before. Cages didnt scare me, they calmed me down. Cages meant no one could get in here to do anything to me. Cages meant rest. All the horrible things happen outside the cage. A cage is where you go in between your torture sessions, while the Mistress is sleeping. Raven must have gone to bed. I wonder what time it is. I wonder if Ill get out of here tomorrow. HANDS UP, POLICE!!, I heard a womans voice screaming suddenly from upstairs and I jumped out of my skin, listening and sitting up. Dont you fucking move or Ill blow your head off!!, the woman shouted again as my brow furrowed. Bella?, I felt my chest tighten. It better NOT be. Maybe it was just wishful thinking on my part. Take me to the basement. I heard the Bella-like voice demand, then yell, NOW!! I heard movement up above me and my arms lowered over my penis, in case company really was coming down here. Finally, the basement door opened and light poured down in here, not touching my cage as footsteps descended the steps.

It was hard for me to see anything, being in the dark then having the bright light suddenly. I could see Dylans silhouette and another small silhouette next to him, wearing a policemans hat. She bought him., Dylan said to the cop behind him, Hes a male prostitute, hes here willingly. Shut the fuck up! Let him out., the womans voice barked, shoving Dylan towards my cage. Dylan uncranked the wench, lowering my cage to the table below. Then he unlocked it with his key and took a step or two back. Another large cops shadow came down the stairs and he said, to the woman officer, Cuff this guy upstairs, let me handle this, alright? The smaller officer went up with Dylan but I was still sitting in the cage, not moving. The cop came up to the cage, towering over me and lit his flashlight under his face, smiling, and saying, Hey, Bro. Emmett, I whispered, looking around, What are you doing? Breaking you out., he informed. I still hadnt moved. Wheres Raven?, I asked. Cuffed, upstairs., Emmett smiled, Its safe, Edward, you can come out. I started to crawl out of the cage and Emmett tossed clothes on the table next to the empty cage. I brought some of my clothes for you to put on., Emmett said, Wasnt sure where yours would be and didnt want Bella seeing youyou knowthis way. That WAS Bella?!, I asked, sounding a little angry, but it was more like worried, concernedstupefied. And she wants to counsel crazy people? Shes one of them! In fact, shes their leader! Oh yea., Emmett smirked, This was all her idea. She had your cop uniform and cuffs and gun. She was going to come here on her own but I couldnt let her do that. Youd kill me, first of all. Putting on Emmetts sweatpants, I agreed, Definitely. And secondit wasnt right for Victoria to leave you hanging here again, especially after last time., Emmett waited while I slowly put the big, soft shirt on, wincing a little as it touched my back. Id never let you go through that shit again., Emmett continued, Dont forget, Ive been down here before, too, you know. I know., I almost had tears in my eyes, and I had to hug the guy, Thank you, Em.

Come on, lets get outta here before Bella beats Raven over the head with her nightstick., Emmett led the way up the stairs. Raven didnt see my face., Emmett told me as we got to the top of the stairs, Bella got her while she slept. The guy I never saw before. He must be kinda new. So were in the clear. Just then, as I moved towards the kitchen to get my clothes and car keys, Bella came running in, facing me, stopping when she saw me. I froze, seeing her eyes reflect so many things: hurt, worry, anger, betrayal, love, relief She plucked the keys out of my hand and looked at Emmett. Edward is going with me. You can follow us in your car, alright?, Bella asked Emmett, completely ignoring me. Uh, yea., he hesitated, looking at me. I nodded at him, silently telling him it was alright as we left the kitchen exit. Emmett pointed out my car to Bella and she opened the driver side, getting in as I took my seat in the passenger side. She started the engine and looked behind her, taking off her cop hat and throwing it in the back seat before she peeled out, going down the concrete path that would take her out of the estate and onto the road. When I finally had the guts to look up into her face she was crying and speeding at the same time. Bella, do you want me to drive? I tried to ask but I got cut off in mid sentence. I AM SO MAD AT YOU RIGHT NOW!!, she shouted, the tears falling down her face. I know. HOW THE HELL CAN YOU LOOK RIGHT INTO MY FACE AND TELL ME SOME BULLSHIT ABOUT PAINTING AT THE CLUB WHEN YOU KNOW DAMN WELL YOU HAD AN APPOINTMENT TO BE TORTURED ALL DAY BY THAT PSYCHO BITCH!! Well, I was AND THEN YOU HAVE YOUR SO CALLED FRIENDS AND MINE KEEP ME BUSY SHOPPING FOR SEXY UNDERWEAR ALL DAY WHILE YOURE BEING BRUTALIZED?!!! Hey, they ARE my friends, Emmett just risked his ass to help you get me out of there!, I tried to at least make that point clear. I didnt blame her for screaming and being angry, but I couldnt let her say Emmett and Jasper werent true friends. Bella was crying harder and I almost suggested driving myself again. I JUST DONT GET IT, EDWARD, I REALLY DONT!!, she wept and yelled at the same time, I CARE ABOUT YOU, I LOVE YOU AND I WANT TO SAVE YOU BUT I CANT DO IT ALONE! YOU HAVE TO WANT IT, TOO! AND I DONT FEEL LIKE YOU WANT IT. YOUVE GOTTEN USED TO THIS LIFE SOMEWHERE ALONG THE LINE!!

ONE DAY, YOURE GOING TO DIE IN A BASEMENT JUST LIKE THAT ONE DONT YOU SEE THAT?! I laid back in the car seat, aching all over and replied, I told you, Bella. My few hours in there today paid me 50 grand! Unless I rob a bank, theres no other way for me to get that kind of money that fast. You dont know my daughter needs it. I do know!, she said, wiping her right eye, and she pulled the car over hard along the side of the road, staring right into my scared face. I know about the fire and I heard your message on the tape. And I am telling you right now, the lies stop here! You will tell me everything I want to know, you will be honest with me no matter what, and you will do as I say from now on during our time together! Or you can get out now!!, she shouted. This is my car., I almost smiled but held it in. Only Bella could make me smile after the day Ive been through. She looked surprised by that fact for a second then frowned more. I dont care whose car it is!!, she barked, Are you with me or are you out? I didnt need long to decide. Im with you, Bella., I said, sincerely, honestly, completely. A tear fell from her eye and she turned the wheel, going back onto the street again, at a more normal pace now. Finally, she spoke and her voice was small and frail sounding. Are you okay, Edward?, she cried, Do you want to go to the hospital? Im fine, Bella., I hated seeing her cry, No hospital. There would be questions. What did she, Bella began to ask and then cried again. Please dont cry, Bella., I felt tears in my own eyes now, Ill be fine. I just need a long hot bath Alright., she nodded, trying to stop crying. And a night in bed., I added. Okay., she said. And my Bella., I added, last but not least. She sobbed again and we had to pull over again so I could hold herand she could hold mecarefully. Poor Emmett behind us, he mustve thought we were nuts or something. We cried without words for awhile and then Bella started us driving again, wanting to get me home to take care of me. It was going to be a rough night. I knew when Bella saw my body she would be sick but I thought maybe I could hide it - No. I cant hide from Bella anymore. No matter what, I owe her the truth. The ugly, bare, truth.

I wanted to tell her I was sorry, so sorry for hurting her this way, which is exactly why I didnt want to tell her where I was going this morning, but now I see how wrong I was thinking I could shield her from it. Bella is not a child and shes not stupid. She loves me and that is stupid, but its not her fault. I was so wrong to lie to her. I would never do that again. Once we got to Bellas place, Emmett was giving us all his favorite things to treat my wounds and he asked if we wanted him to stay. Im alright., I rubbed my eyes, Im tired, mostly, and a little sore. Itll heal. Call me, Bella, if you need me., Emmett hugged her and she thanked him again for going with her to rescue me. Even I hugged him again before he left. After he left, Bella turned and went into the bathroom, starting to run a bath. I slowly followed her and hugged my arms around Emmetts large shirt, glad it covered most of my skin. The water was steaming as it began to fill the tub and Bella wiped her eyes, taking a deep breath and looking at me with so much love and pain in her eyes it made my eyes cry again. Im here for you, Edward., she said, not reaching out to grab me and I was glad for that. I know, Bella., I heard my voice crack. She sniffed and stood up before me, not crowding me, giving me my space. This is going to be hard for both of us., she said openly, But well get through it together, alright? Yes, Bella., I shivered a little. Alright., Bella put a hand to her stomach, then took it away, Would you like me to help you undress? Ill do it., I said quietly, looking at the floor. Okay., Bella closed her eyes and another tear fell but she didnt wipe it away. Would you like me to leave you alone?, she asked. No., I heard my voice answer, I dont want to hurt you anymore butI dont want to be alone right now, either. Its alright, Edward., Bella sniffed again, I want to stay. I want to take care of you. I told you, Im with you to the end. I mean that. And with all my emotion, I answered, I know you do. Slowly, I began to take Emmetts shirt off and watched her eyes as I raised my arms up, slipping it off. To her credit, she didnt make a face or scream out. I could see lots of dark red lines, welts mostly, and not many cuts, from the single tail whip. They would take a couple days to fade a bit, over a week to disappear altogether, from my flesh, at least. But they were ugly marks. I knew that.

These same marks were surely on my back and ass, too, as well as my inner thighs as I carefully took off the thankfully big soft sweatpants I was wearing. Bella sniffed a lot and wiped her eyes as I stepped into the tub, closing my eyes and cringing a bit as I sat in the clear water. Then she was dipping a washcloth into the water and with the finesse of a skilled doctor, began to apply hot pressure with the cloth to certain marks on my back, letting the water do its work as my eyes closed, tears of relief and emotion moving slowly along the peaks and valleys of my face as she once again, showed me how deep and true her love was. Anyone can say the words I love you but Bella could say it without opening her mouth to me. She said it to me all night long. With the strength of 100 men she stayed with me for the rest of the night, washing me, drying me, massaging Emmetts medicines into my skin while I shivered all over. Her sweet voice telling me she loved me and that I was going to be alright was always there. She was going through Hell with me and didnt complain once. She dressed me in the nightshirt she gave me and long flannel pants and covered me in blankets, laying beside me and stroking my cheek like I was the last man on earth and so precious to her. She talked me to sleep with stories of her summer camp adventures as a kid, taking me to a young, innocent place I so desperately needed just then. I heard tales of first kisses, canoe rides beneath the moon, and pranks against mean camp counselors. At last my eyes began to close in the dark beside her and I said, BellaI know that I said we couldnt say I love you anymore to each other, but is it okay if I take that back? It sounded like she was smiling when she answered, If you want to, if its the truth, yes. I want to take it back., I said, surely. Alright., she said, You have it back. Bella? Yes, Edward? I love you. Thank you, Edward., Bellas voice said softly, For being honest. A pause went by between us and my frown was creasing my forehead. Bella? Yes, Edward? I paused again. Do youlove mestill? I am so needy. After all she did for me tonight, I still need to hear itstill want to hear it.

No way., she scoffed, Youre a big pain in the ass. A very long pause rose up between us then. Edward? Yes, Bella? Of course I love you., she said. I smiled and my whole body felt magically healed right at that moment. Stupid., she added.

17 Sunday, Day 7 BPOV A small piece of me almost thought, as I opened my eyes, that last night had all been a terrible dream. I still cant believe I dressed up as a cop and broke into Ravens house last night. It was the first heroic thing Id ever done. I rescued Edward from the jaws of evil! It was the kind of thing Id always see in a movie and would tell myself, I would probably do that if I were her. But I was never really sure deep inside, if I would risk it all for someone else. I never had any adventure or conflict in my life before. I could hardly complain at a restaurant and in the last two days, Ive assaulted two different women. Wow. Whats happened to me? Edward. It happened.. I DID do it. Charlie would be so proud. Or would he? Im so glad Edward is here with me now, instead of shivering naked in that cage at Ravens basement. I would be a wreck at this point, not knowing where he was or what was happening to him. He looks so warm now and peaceful and I couldnt help smiling as I just studied his facewho could harm something so beautiful? And there are those little puckered lips again. I have to kiss those. Leaning in a bit, I ever so gently touched my mouth to his, loving the sensation of his petal-soft skin. Mmmmm, his voice was colored with pleasure. His eyes stayed closed but his lips kissed out at the air, wanting more. I smiled, coming back and giving him more, but just gentle caresses with my lips. Then I kissed each eyelid, foreheadand the little dent in his chin. His lips smiled contentedly, the eyes still resting closed.

Im still mad at you., I said in a firm voice. And then his eyes opened, looking ashamed. Well, you have to forgive me., he said very plainly. I do? I can make you forgive me, Bella., his smile became a devilish smirk as he began to sit up. No, no. I grinned, easing him back onto the bed, Today, youre my prisoner. You will be resting and behaving yourself all day. Its all part of my I care about you fetish. But, Bella, its so nice outside , he sounded like a little boy, Dont you wanna come out and play with me? We could go to another bookstoreor maybe a supermarketcleanup on aisle 9 His fingers were trying to worm their way under my pajama top but I pulled away. Edward, down., I smiled at his playfulness as I got out of bed, Im going to make you some breakfast and youre going to be good and stay in bed today. Period. He growled and pouted a little as I went into the kitchen and began to make him a wonderful meal. I moved the TV into the bedroom and let Edward watch his beloved cartoons while I worked. Once in awhile, I heard him laugh and was again amazed at how fast Edward bounced back from things. Therapy can wait until tomorrow. He needs a break, a nice whole day and night to relax and heal. I noticed already hes trying to play the part of sexually attentive lover. Is that real or is he avoiding what happened last night? Where is his anger? Where is his fear? I have seven days to find a way out for him. Im not letting him go back. As we sat in bed together, eating and watching TV, Edwards cell phone rang next to him on the nightstand. He quickly picked it up and peeked, looking at me, holding a finger up and saying, Dont say a word. He flipped it open and said, Yes, Victoria? After a pause, he said, Yes, I know. His mouth became a hard line and he listened, then said, Im sorry. Unbelievable. Hes apologizing to her?! After she left him there with that nut last night?! I have real work to do this week with him in therapy. Yes. Ill be there., he said, looking into my tense face. He winced and then flipped his phone closed, looking up at me from under his lashes. Does she know?, I asked, unable to breathe yet.

No, at least as far as shes telling me., Edward said, She was just mad I didnt call her after I left Ravens place. Maybe no one found them yet., I wondered. No, Raven lives in a mansion. There are maids, gardeners, servants. Im sure theyre free by now., Edward looked pensive, Maybe Raven doesnt want to get me into trouble. What was that Ill be there part?, I asked, already knowing. He looked at me and tensed a little, She said to make sure Im in my room next Monday morning at dawn. I hate her. Do you think she really knows and isnt saying anything?, I felt paranoid now. I didnt want Edward hurt any more because of something retarded I had done. No., Edward took a sip of his juice, If she really knew, shed be here to take me home herself. I think were safe, Bella. Please dont worry. Edward, thats not home, with her., I said clearly, my eyes dead serious as I looked at him, Youre home now. He smiled at me and opened his mouth to speak but no words came. His eyes twinkled with traces of tears and he kissed me, cradling my face in his hands. I love you, Bella., he whispered, as if afraid to let anyone else hear it. So I tried not to worry, but I still did. Anyway, we had a very pleasant day just watching movie marathons and laying in bed, side by side, holding hands, cuddling and kissing like teenagers during the commercials. I was letting Edward eat junk food and this seemed like a big treat for him. Another discovery: Edward loves Doritos, Cool Ranch style. How am I doing at this I care about you game?, he asked later, as he moved his nose up the slope of mine, laying on his side, his arms curling around my back. Pretty good so far., I kissed the tip of his nose, You havent tried to escape once. You make a very pleasant jail, Bella., he smiled, I like doing time here. His mouth opened and lured mine inside it and in seconds, I was kissing him with raw lust and he was matching my intensity. How does he always do this to me? I planned on being innocent and resting today. And now Im in heat again. I moaned as his hand slipped in the side of my pajama pants and slid half of them off my ass and down my thigh a bit, his fingers digging into my left ass cheek. Before I knew it, his head disappeared under the covers, and then I felt his hot, wet tongue and mouth playing along my lower stomach. A knock sounded on the door and I groaned, about to move when from under the covers, teeth bit into my hipbone and his voice gritted, Dont you dare.

I laughed and winced and struggled a little and said, Someones at the door. Theyll go away., he said before his thick, hot tongue moved up near my belly button. SHIT!! That feels so fucking good! Edward., I felt him move my body and lay me on my back, holding my wrists at my sides as his nose moved my top up, his mouth nibbling and licking my ribs. Bella a mans voice called from outside the door and my head popped up, and Edward stopped kissing and biting me under the blanket. Whos that?, Edward asked. Not sure., I frowned, getting out of bed as I moved to the door, putting the chain across the lock and opening the door a crack, hiding my body behind it. James- I mean, Dr. Collier, hi., I smiled as he stood there with two Starbucks coffees in his hands. Good afternoon, Bella., he smiled, I was just on my way to the MOMA and thought maybe youd like to come along. MOMA stands for Museum of Metropolitan Art. This is a first. He never just showed up here before. Whats that all about? Oh, thanks, but, no., I said, Im not feeling very well. Kinda just laying around in bed today. Oh I see., James eyes moved up behind me. I turned and saw Edward there, arms crossed, giving James a look that could freeze water. My head spun back to the crack in the doorway and I felt my cheeks turn hot. Sorry, Bella., James gave a nod and glanced at Edward again and turned to walk away, See you at school. Okay, bye., I said, closing the door, spinning around, Whatre you doing? I said stay in bed today. So thats James., he raised a brow, Hes not that horrible looking. Why did you do that?, I half smiled, Are you jealous? Just letting the other wolves know that Im here, thats all, little Bella sheep. All men are predators, searching for prey. And James can keep searching., he grinned, tossing me over his shoulder and taking me back to bed. Emmett checked in later, calling Edward on his cell phone as we had pizza for lunch in bed. (Edward commented that hed have to work out for two hours instead of one tomorrow because of all the great junk food.) After Edward hung up, he told me that Jasper stayed at Fire last night after Emmett left and covered for him, telling Victoria that a customer requested Emmett in a private room. Emmett said that everything seemed quiet with Victoria right now, and if anything suspicious happens, he would call us right away.

I checked Edwards lashes, front and back, and applied more ointment to each one, after placing very cautious kisses upon them, of course. I noticed Edward was remarkably silent as I did this and after a long time, he spoke. No one ever took such care of me before., he said quietly, staring down at the blankets. Well, youve been neglected., I said, using one of his more brilliant lines, But Im here now. Three oclock arrived and Edward reached for his cell phone. Its time for me to make my call., he said, staring at the phone in his hand, again, more quiet than normal. Ill go for a little walk or something., I grabbed my jeans, You stay in bed, though. I went towards the bathroom to change and check my hair in the mirror but Edward said, Wait. Whats the matter?, I spun around, seeing his eyes were closed as he held his phone with both hands, Are you alright? I thought maybe something hurt or was bleeding. Im fine, Bella., he opened his eyes and looked at me. Looking at him, I was confused and waited to hear what he wanted. Would you, he looked deeper into my eyes, like to stay? You dont have to go. He wanted me to stay while he made his phone call? Really? This is a big deal. I certainly wouldnt speak to who ever it was he was calling, but him asking me to stay and hear itshowed so much trust. After last night, I thought his trust capacity was shattered and hed never let his walls down with me again. I was so glad to be wrong about that. I nearly cried. I would like to, if you want me to., I inched closer and closer to the bed. I want you, Bella., he gave me a small smile and he patted my side of the bed, offering me a seat beside him. I turned off the TV and sat down and Edward began to scroll down his list of numbers. So, I took a breath, Who are we calling? My daughter., he informed with a soft voice, as if he were saying a prayer, adding, KaitlynKatie.

Edward session six., I was saying later that night after dinner. Again, Edward had asked for his session, and wanted to try it without the blindfold or scarf around the wrists. I was glad, too, because after seeing him in that cage at Ravens, I dont think I couldve even done it to him.

Hi Edward. I smiled at him, admiring him so much. He was being so brave and I had really enjoyed listening to little Katies voice on the phone earlier. She mostly talked about her day, spent at a carnival in town. She got to ride the pony ride twice, had lots of cotton candy, and petted a bunny. The one thing that hurt me to hear, and I know it hurt Edward, too, even though he acted used to it, was when her tiny little voice asked when he was coming home. Soon, sweetie., he had said as I grinned at him, but on the inside, I wanted to scream. But at least one more good thing came from me hearing the call. Now I had this sweet little voice in my head, wanting her Daddy, to drive me harder to find Edward his way out. Hi Dr. Bella., he responded, smiling at me in my pajamas, sitting in my chair, trying to act all professional. I want to say something before we go any further, okay? I spoke gently, getting a nod from Edward. You went through a terrible ordeal yesterday., I got it out there, What happened to you was evil, brutal, and savage. And today youre smiling. This morning, I heard you laughing at cartoons. He paused and shrugged, It was a funny one. What Im saying is, I pointed out, You seem to come back very quickly from things. Do you block it all out or do you forget it? I have to forget it., he moved his finger up and down the edge of the sofa cushion he was sitting on, Its part of the job. I dont have time to cry over it and Id never be allowed to lay in bed all day after a day with someone like Raven. I want you to say some things out loud., I said, Okay? Okay., he didnt look bothered by this. I am someone., I stated, raising my eyes to his. He looked down for a second and I added, And look at me when you say it. And mean it. I am someone., he said, not sounding very sure of that phrase as his eyes half stayed on mine. Again. I firmly pushed with my voice. I amsomeone., he repeated, sounding less confidant than the first time. I matter., I said, wanting him to repeat that next. Edward sighed and looked at me with hurt eyes. Bella, this is stupid., he muttered, struggling inside again, avoiding my eyes. Whats stupid, Edward? Having me repeat things that arent true wont make me believe them., he confessed, Im a fucking slave, I dont matter at all. Im no one.

Here we were, back at step one again. We keep hitting this wall. I want it gone. I had to break through it. Edward couldnt be saved if he truly felt he was a slave and worth nothing. Youre Katies father, arent you?, I asked and watched his eyes flame over and look up into mine. There is the anger. This is the moment I didnt want to happen yet, but has to happen to wipe the polite smile off his face. Maybe it was good that its happening now, not giving him much time after Ravens day to recover and pretend it all away. Im not that, either, anymore., Edward almost sneered, Ben is Katies father now. Well, thats probably best, since you have no self worth, how can you teach her any?, I began to ignite that flame inside him. He began to answer, his eyes squinting and his voice saying, I dont think--- I mean, how can you teach her to be strong and defend herself against all the evil predators of the world when you just smile, lay down and let them feed on you and lick your bones?, I asked, hiding my feelings for him and hating it. I had to be Dr. Bella now, like it or not. I told you, I, he was frowning fully now, not liking what I had to say. What if Raven or Victoria someday got their hands on Katie?, I asked, Would you kneel down and say, Yes, Victoria, then? SHUT UP BELLA!!, he leapt to his feet and roared, tears and rage burning in his eyes. Now! Say it!!, I stood and grabbed his arms and almost shook him a little. I MATTER!!, he shouted, shaking a little, I AM someone Good! Stay with me, Edward., I grabbed the scarf and quickly put it around his eyes, making the one knot behind his head. I closed my eyes and gave his cheek a light slap, saying, You worthless slut. What do you say, Edward?, I gave his other cheek a little tap, Come on, Im Victoriaright here in front of you. Talk to me. I tapped the other cheek again and he flinched. No, he shivered all over, Dont, Bella. Im not Bella. And whered the anger go so fast?, I asked, You can let it out, Edward, dont be afraid. Its okay. Im Victoria and I want you to answer me. NOW. Stop., his voice was quiet again and I was getting mad. I wanted his anger. Pretend Katie can hear us now., I tapped his face again as his face half turned to the left, Use that in your mind every time someone is hurting you. See yourself as Katies father, not a slave. I am Victoria. I want you to answer whatever youre feeling. Let your anger out. Its killing you.

I slapped his face and sneered like Victoria would, Time to fuck me now, slut. Stop!, his mouth frowned more and his voice was louder. I dont take orders from you, you little whore, I said FUCK ME!! I yelled and slapped his face harder. At this, he let out a deep growl and out came this lion voice that I never heard him use before scream out, GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF ME!! Ooooh. YES! Goodgood, Edwardshhhh, I said, holding his hands and kissing them as they trembled in mine, Sit down herecarefulits okayshhhh I eased him back onto the sofa and was about to take the blindfold off him when he spoke again. I hate you., he sneered from a dark, ancient place in his gut, I hate your face, your body, your voice, and even your smellI HATE YOU VICTORIA. I hate you The venom in his voice was clear and I knew hed never said these words before. I was so relieved to hear him voice this. Its a big step forward. I am again amazed by Edwards openness, his willingness to try during my sessions. In only a few days, hes come so far. I think deep down hes always wanted help but never admitted ituntil now. I love youI love you I whispered as I held and rocked him. I felt his hands slip around my waist and touch my back, tightening. Good, Edwardso good., I whispered, closing my eyes.

EPOV Monday, Day 8 I slept like a baby last night. I think Bella has some kind of a spell on me or something. And last nights session was just pure genius. I still cant believe it worked, but for a few seconds, I actually felt Victoria in front of me, slapping me around, as she loves to. How did Bella know that? It couldnt be just a lucky guess. Even now, I feel like I really told her off last night. Although, if I had, Id be in the cage today, bleeding down my back. I was dressed and feeling great this morning after my day of leisure yesterday. I told Bella we were going out to have some fun today, away from therapy and Fire, and Victoria and school. I just wanted to be Edward today and take Bella on a day long date in the city. I have a week off and I dont intend to waste a second of it. I would be taking my girl out. Wearing my jeans and a gray sweatshirt with the collar and sleeves cut off, I checked in the full length mirror to make sure my scars werent showing on my arms and they were well hidden.

Bella finally emerged, wearing a little pair of red cotton shorts and a cute little white tank top. Jesus, shes sexy, even in casual clothes. My leer and growl let her know I approved of her look today and finally, we were outside, in the breeze and sunshine, and I drove my car with all the windows open, blasting my music and feeling so great I wanted to scream it out loud. Bella complained at first that her hair was getting messed up but then she let herself go and let it fly out around her faceand she was the most beautiful woman Id ever seen. I mentally took that picture and stored it in my heart for later, for when I needed to see something pure and magical and true. I placed it right within the set of pictures I had there of my daughter and Tanya. It fit in very nicely there. We went to Central Park and walked around for hours, just talking about fun everyday things, nothing too heavy. I liked it. I felt normal. We ate hot dogs and popcorn, ice cream, all while sitting on the grass enjoying the warmth and peace all around us, under the light shade of tall oak tree. Have you ever made love on the grass, Bella?, I asked her, my eyes not letting her avoid me with their stare, my fingers moving over the high, fresh wet blades of green beside me. I think Ive told you, I did it once before you., she blushed a little, smiling back at me, And that was in the back seat of a car. So, then, no., I answered. No., she hugged her knees with her arms. Come here, Bella., I smirked at her, wondering if shed do it. Every time you say come here I get fucked., she retorted. Are you complaining?, I almost laughed at her comment. No. Then come here., I said again, not demandingly. She crawled over to where I was sitting on the grass and stayed on all fours, kissing my lips as my hands held each side of her face. I kissed her as if it had been years since Id tasted something so soft and delicious. Its how I felt. I swept her up in my arms and rolled her so she was laying on her back and I laid beside her, one leg curled over both of hers, gently holding her there. Her dark hair looked so gorgeous strewn out against the emerald floor beneath her. And her ivory skindamn it. I held her hand in mine and our fingers laced together as she smiled up at me, wondering what was on my mind. Without a word, I kissed her hand and then placed it up above her, resting on the grass as my fingers slowly moved her t-shirt up, exposing her stomach and finally, her white bra. She tensed a bit and turned her head to the side, looking to see if anyone was watching or around.

Shhh, shhhBella Swan I took her chin and turned it back towards me, None of that. Keep your eyes on me. No one is looking. No one is around. And so what if they were? Relaxenjoy. I moved my fingers over her chin like it was made of delicate glass, moving extremely slowly down her neckher body relaxed again and her fingers loosenedand she moved her other arm up over her head, closing her eyes and breathing in and out as I stroked her face with my right hand. Thats rightjust feel me., I instructed with a whisper, Feel the air on your bodykissing your skin like I do Still moving very slowly, I moved the t-shirt up, moving it off her chest and up over her face, letting it fall around her wrists as her eyes opened, looking up at mineher lips smiling a littlenervously but excitedly. Feel the wet grass on your back, I smiled, adoring her expression. Its so naturalso cool and wetits not wrongnothing is wrong I unclasped the front hook of her bra, taking my sweet time to open it as her little voice gave a whimper, her body shivering a little. Its okay, I assured her, moving my fingers over her right breastthen her leftso carefully as if shed pop if I touched her too hardI wanted my fingers to be as delicate as the breeze. I moved the bra straps off her shoulders and placed it next to me on the ground. Just lay herefeel how good it is, I nearly whispered as another pleasant breeze danced around us, enjoying the show, You are so beautifulyou belong herewith all the other beautiful, eternal things.airearthwatersun. I still had not kissed or grabbed her too roughly, I was worshipping her every inchevery poreevery curveI was taking mental pictures againher white, perfect breastspouting out below my fingers, nipples hardening the second I made contactmoving in extremely painfully slow circles around them. She let out a little moan, and her eyes stayed on mine, obeying my instructions as I smiled down on her with pride. She is such a good student. Feel the sun kissing your flesh, I leaned in cautiously and kissed the warm land between her breasts, hearing her moan again, her breathing deepen. I moved my fingers down her torso, and both my hands gently sliding the shorts down. I waited for her to tense and protestbut she didnt. Along with the shorts, I also moved the panties off, too and her eyes were clinging onto mine, her fingers curled a bit above her head then relaxed once more. I knew this was a lot for her, to let me undress her like this outside in the open, but you couldnt see the internal struggle from my view. She was trusting mecompletely. Uhhh., she let out as I exposed her ass to the earth below, letting the sun sparkle in the little curl of brown hair between her legs as I placed the garments under her head, letting them serve as a pillow of sorts. Very good, Bella, I used my low voice, removing her sneakers carefullythen each ankle sock, Restenjoy itsome people never get to feel how wonderful this isyou are far too alivenot to feel this.

I stroked her legs as they laid straight out beside me. I didnt open them yetI wanted her to just lay here with meand drink the feelings and sensations inside herI tilted my head, smiling as I watched her eyes closeno signs of tension in her anywhereamazing. I love you so much, I whispered, You are too beautiful to be real. You look like a goddessGoddess of the Grass I smirked at my own comment as she gave a little laugh and I plucked a daisy from a few inches away, beginning my Goddess worship. Touching the petals to her forehead, I made a V across the skin there, moving at a snails pace. She smiled and so did I, then I moved down her nose, turning the daisy a bit as I went, and tickled the tip a little, chuckling as she wiggled her nose in response. Next, I let the petals kiss her lips, moving along their edges. Her lips opened a bit and her eyes opened, looking at me again. God, what a picture right there! Click. Mine forever. And only mine. Moving downward, I let the flower caress her chin, moving in a soft circle, letting every petal participate there. Feel the grass tickling your toes ?, I asked and she nodded, closing her eyes again. Good., I admired her again, moving the daisy down under her chin, then down the slender white of her neck.down the center of her chest Without a word, I spun the flower slowly over her nipple, letting each one get a turn kissing it. She let out small moans and her eyes kept opening and closing, each time holding more fire than the last. But I took forever to make sure the flower explored every inch of Bella. Im sure daisies dreamt of touching something so unique and exquisite as she. This was the lucky daisy. Edward, she whispered, opening her eyes again. She didnt have to speak to say what she said to me. I hoped she wouldnt be turned off by my marks as I took my own shirt off, but she smiled at me as if I were the most handsome man shed ever feasted her eyes upon. She always made me feel that way. I will really miss that look when its gone. I stood up and without looking around, I unzipped and removed my jeans and underwear, kneeling back down in the cover of the tall grass, joining her. Edward, I love youI love you so much, she clutched my face into her hands and gave me an intense, smothering kiss I would never forget. Ive been kissed so many different waysbut never this way. I tried to keep up with her lips but she was far more passionate than I and my voice whimpered from the sweet burns her hot mouth made in me. Im sorry., she panted, kissing me between her words, Did I hurt you? Too rough? No, Bella, never I kissed as I tried to speak, You never hurt megrab me as rough as you want, I love your touchplease

With this, she dug her nails into my back and pulled me on top of hermy legs instinctually straddled hers as I touched the ground with both hands, not wanting to lay my entire weight on her little frame. I loved her scratching my back and the little stabs of pain as she dug in where my scars wereit was like she was wiping them away with her own marks, erasing them with her fingers. YesBellayesssoh God, my voice was breathing as she kissed me even harder. I want you now, she panted between kisses, Now! My little kitten is a tigress! Yes, Bella., I smiled, hoping she didnt get mad that I was talking like a slave again. I am her slaveforeverand it has nothing to do with her twenty thousand dollars. Even Victoria doesnt own me anymorenot reallyits Bellait will always be her noweven if I cant be with her. Yes, thank God I brought condoms. I always have condoms, being me. I had one on in two seconds. I was inside her now and my mouth never left hersmy tongue letting her dominate it, tasting it, licking roughly and wetly along its edge as I moved, still very slowly.in.out..innnnn.ooouuuutttttt. Somehow, this was even more wild and intense than a good old fashioned slamming, which I loved to dobut it seemed here, in the center of all this, was more fittingrightnatural and goodpure. Bella, I breathed as I made love to her, feeling the blowing blades of grass tickling my ass cheeks, Bellaso goodso. And her mouth took me in again, silencing me. She wrapped her legs around my waist as I struggled to keep moving slow within her, not wanting to make one wrong misstep in this perfect little bubble we were immersed inwhat world is thisIve never been to such a beautiful place beforeand why would anyone allow me in here? I opened my mouth and felt her sucking my bottom lip as she panted louder and my pace began to move a tiny bit fasterI teased her with my tongue, licking her mouth and pulling up a bit as she tried to kiss me again. We laughed as we fucked and that was new for me, too. Even ten cops approaching us right now wouldnt stop me. They could fucking waitor shoot me in the assbut I wasnt stopping until I was ready tofor once. Edward, she finally whimpered, her fingers in my back, Fuck mepleasefuck me hard Everyone stand back. Edwards gonna fuck hard now. I unrestrained myself and instantly pounded my cock into her, moving her left leg up a bit, her knee bent as I held it there, getting a deeper angle to thrust myself in as she screamed. Her eyes told me to keep going and I did, biting down on my bottom lip, causing myself a little pain as I began moving all the way out then diving deeply in again instantly.

Breezes blew around us as I shouted out, letting Bellas screams mingle with mine as we banged each other like wild animals, grunting and forgetting words. We were both sweating and shaking at the end, and Bella let out a scream that made the birds fly away from our tree beside us as I came with her. Moments later, I dropped onto my back beside her, staring up at the clouds and bright blue sky and I wondered what my name was, trying to catch my breath as she did the same. My heart was bouncing around inside my chest. Oh my God, Bella was speaking before I had figured out how to do it yet. I think you killed my uterus., she breathed, I know I said fuck me hardbutChristI think Im bleeding internally I heard her try to laugh and I smiled, looking at her, panting in response. I guess you didnt see the warning label on my ass., I joked, Some toys are very dangerous, you know She made a scoff and said, If I wasnt so tiredI would tell you I really hate that statement If I wasnt so tiredI would care, I widened my eyes and then closed them. Im afraid when I get up my ass print is gonna be in the ground!, she chuckled. Are you complaining again?, I asked, hovering over her, half laying on her body. She smiled and shook her head at me. Good., I raised a brow, Because there is no complaint department here. Is there a kiss department?, she asked. Perhaps., I smiled down at her, What can I do for you, Miss? I am looking for a big, wet, juicy kiss., she smiled at me, so innocent looking, What do you have? Well, there are several different things I have, I pointed out, First, theres this And I opened my mouth and placed a very wet, soft kiss there, no tonguefollowed by a few small kisses peppered all over her mouth. Mmmm., she smiled after I ended the kiss and my nose was moving around hers, I like that onebut what else do you have? Oh, you want to see the entire stock, do you?, I smiled darkly over her, Youre gonna be one of those all day customers, arent you? Yes., she confessed and I laughed a little. Good, because I love to please my customers, I said, and I hated that I said it as soon as it was out of my mouth. Oh GodBella, I felt sick inside, I didnt meanI was just playingI didnt mean to call you a customer.

And once again, she understood me and calmed me. I know, Edward., she held my face, Its okay, we were playing. But I know that Im only a customer. Its okay. I frowned at her and said, No, its not okay. Youre not a customer to me, youre I paused, sitting on the grass on my bare ass, adding, honestly, everything. Well now you know how it feels for me when you call yourself a toy or a slave., she pointed out, expertly teaching me something without me seeing it coming again. Touch., I smiled. Now, she pulled me back towards her lips again, Show me those other kisses you have in stock. I dont have all day. Yes Maam., I smiled, leaning in and demonstrating my savage, Im trying to suffocate you kiss.

It wasnt until it was dark that we were near Bellas place, but we were having so much fun I never wanted it to end. We walked around, going nowhere, just talking, learning more about each other, eating ice pops from the ice cream truck. My life will never get any better than this and I knew it at the time. I wished Katie were here with us. That would be the only thing that could make it more perfect. We window shopped and I got Bella a cool pair of sunglasses that she looked hot as hell in, and she bought me a friendship ring. It cost five dollars and wasnt meant to be a real gift, but to me it was priceless. I wore it on my pinky and knew when I got home it would be going in my secret wall. A slave has no possessions. I have clothes and jewelry, but only for show, so I dont embarrass Victoria when we go out. Things like this friendship ring and my fortune from the cookie last week were things Id never be allowed to keep. Mementos of love and gifts from clients, gifts from female friends were forbidden. So, I have a secret wall in my room where a couple bricks can be removed and I have some important things in there. Things Victoria cant steal from me. Pictures of Katie and Tanya, a ring my father once gave me for graduation when I was 17, my wedding ring, and now this one, along with my fortune. These are my most prized possessions. And Ill always have them, somehow. I hope. Neither one of us wanted to go inside and we hung out on the stairs outside Bellas place, her sitting on the lower stair from me, surrounded by my long legs that wrapped around her protectivelymore like possessively. She held my legs to her as it began to get a bit chilly around 11, and she began shivering so I suggested we go inside. I still cant believe we didnt get caught making love outside today., Bella commented as we ascended the stairs going into her apartment. Ive found that people dont really care what others do., I said, Everyone is so afraid these days to even make eye contact with strangers. And even if someone

saw uswho cares? It wouldnt have ruined the time I was havinghow about you? Nope., she smiled, my prized student, I mightve even flashed them. I laughed as she opened the door, going in. What have I done to that sweet, notebook girl I met at the club?, I followed her. Freed me, saved me, she answered, Letting me feel what it is to LIVEfinally? Mmmm I took her in my arms and closed my eyes, feeling her lips find mine again as I kissed her back. Thank you for not seeing me as some pervert, Bella., I truthfully responded, I was afraid of that in the beginning, that youd find metoo strange. Smiling up at me, she said, Well, you are strangebut I like it. Thank you. I smiled as she giggled. Bella, can I ask you something?, I laced my fingers at her back, You can say no if you want to. Sure, what? Can Imake you my pet tomorrow?, I asked, almost afraid of what her eyes would do in reaction. I wouldnt hurt you or do anything horrible, like Raven wouldyou would be a slave of pleasure, not pain., I quickly promised. I know you wouldnt hurt me, Edward., she said with no fear in her face, Besides you trying to pound me into the ground earlier, that is. You asked for it!, I said for the fifth time today, Next time, know who youre talking to when you say fuck me hard ! I have a shirt that says Thumper on it for a reason, Bella! You own a shirt that says Thumper on it?!, she laughed. Its a long story, but yes., I said, See, this one time Never mind., Bella cut me off, grinning, and added, I would love to be your pet, Edward. I trust you. You do?, I felt warm all over suddenly. Is this girl real or will I wake up soon, in Victorias cage? Yes., her brow creased, How can you ask me that after I let you fuck me in the middle of Central Park? Let me?, I teased, smiling as she laughed, holding me closer, Bunnies and raccoons probably know how to say fuck me harder now because of you! You scared BIRDS away!! Shut up!, she laughed as pushed her against the wall, holding her there with my full, erect cock.

Ouch!, she looked at me in surprise, What is THAT? This is the Cock Department., I smirked, How can I help you today, Miss? She laughed and straightened, seeing my face wasnt kidding. Ow!, she jumped as my cock twitched against her tight little shorts and said, I am looking for a very talented cock, as a matter of fact. And bigbut not vicious, like one I found in the park today! Oh, I see., I thought about it for a moment, Well, maybe I have something for you. I suppose youre going to show me all the cocks you have in store now? I smiled, No. I just have one. But its all youll ever need. It does everything. Oh, really?, she blushed, trapped as my hands leaned on the wall on both sides of her head. Yes, really., I yanked the shorts down off her, and the panties, too as she let out a little squeal. Let me demonstrate., I unzipped my jeans and underwear, Look at itbig enough? Yes, its huge., she looked at it, smiling, This must be the extra large size. Not a scratch on it, either., I stared into her eyes, Feel it She did, staring back up at me, letting her hand curl around the shaft as I nearly groaned. Last week, Bella didnt want to even look at my penis, now look at her! Hard enough?, I asked. God, yes., she smiled, Impressive. And look.. I tore a condom wrapper in my teeth and put a black condom over myself, It comes with a nice case to store it in. Wow., she giggled as I spun her around and sat her ass on the kitchen counter. But thats nothing., I sold my product, Wait until you feel the demonstration. Without any more foreplay, I opened her legs and penetrated her, going all the way in slowly. Feel how deep it can go?, I asked, my voice a bit strained at how tight her pussy still felt to me, it was so hot. Yes, she closed her eyes and opened them, That isgood. Not done yet., I grinned down at her, Let me show you what this baby can do. Seconds later, I was slamming her, pounding into her, holding her hips and moving them to mine as I took her. She was screaming and moaning, keeping herself sitting up on the counter, holding the walls at her sides for support.

It has great thrusting action, as you can see, I grunted, And the power lasts for a very. LONG. TIME. I said those last three words, thrusting in each time as I spoke them. She screamed out louder, sounding wounded but pleased at the same time. I like that., she managed to say, playing her role, and then the little bitch added, But can it fuck harder? Thumper? Oh, you---, I growled as she laughed. Yes, Maam., I grunted, But dont say I didnt warn yourememberthere is no complaint department. And she howled as I fucked her harder, making her pay for that Thumper remark. Notebook girl is dead. Sexy Bambi is born.

18 BPOV The entire night was just hot as hell, as Edward always says. Now hes got me talking like him. I am still fascinated with how wonderful orgasm feelsunbelievable! His tongue found places inside me that I didnt know existed. Damn, he knows what hes doing. I think I know how he earned the name Thumperand deservedly so. We held each other tight as we fell asleep who knows what time it wasand who cared? When my eyes opened, the sun was shining but all the blinds were down. I felt Edward sitting up next to me in bed and when I turned to him to say something he spun towards me and instantly, his hand was clasped over my mouth, his nose almost touching mine. Good morning, my pet., he smiled down at me, his lips softly kissing my nose as my body trembled a little, No, love, dont be afraid. Ill be good to youyoull see. But if you scream or try to get away, it will hurt me. Im going to make you a nice breakfast first, he said, But until thats ready you have to be still. Today youll be completely mine. Is that clear? I nodded, feeling dampness between my legs already. Good girl., he grinned. He let go of my mouth and I didnt dare make a peep. Next to him on the bed was a roll of duct tape. He tore a small piece off and looked sternly down at me. Close your mouth., he said with the sweet, eerie voice and I obeyed, feeling the thick piece of tape smoothing over my lips. His fingers carefully moved over the tape, making sure every inch was stuck in place.

Over., he rolled me over and began tying a rope around my wrist, not enough to hurt me, it wasnt tight at all, and then he ran the rope behind my back and around the other wrist. When he rolled me onto my back, my hands were trapped at my sides, not underneath me. Then, without a word, he began tying a rope around my ankles, pinning them together, then to the left lower leg of my bed, holding me down securely, but not at all painfully or even uncomfortably. Stay., he smiled, kissing the duct tape where my lips were, and he went off into the kitchen to cook breakfast. Ive always fantasized about being tied up and left like thisand the tape over my mouth excited me. I felt so helpless and kidnapped and at the same time sexy as I tried to yank my ankles, not able to move them much at all. Closing my eyes, I made little mmmm sounds, half turning my body, then returning it to its original place. He couldve tied me a lot tighter and in a lot more difficult position if he chose to, and maybe he would later. Part of me hoped so. Edward mustve heard my pitiful little sounds but he seemed to ignore them while he cooked. I let my hair fall over my eyes as I continued to play struggle, really enjoying myself, getting into our game. Mmmm, pretty little pet, he said as he came in, placing a tray on the nightstand on his side of the bed, Im so happy that I have this all to myself today. He dipped his fingers in a glass of water and when he touched my skin, I felt the cold as he eased the tape off my mouth, not hurting me a bit. He must know a lot about how to properly get duct tape off flesh. Such a good girl., he praised me, Now, youre not allowed to speak, even without a gag. Youre my pet nowand pets dont speak, ever. Yes? I nodded and got his smile in returnand a little kiss on the lips. He came to my side of the bed and sat me up, sitting down himself, holding the plate in front of me, showing me scrambled eggs. Eat, Bambi., he had nicknamed me this last night, since I kept calling him Thumper. I never in my life figured Id ever had the nickname of Bambi. Life is funny. Eat? I couldnt use my handsand he wasnt going to feed meeat, he said. He watched me, raising a brow. Come on, girl, its getting cold., he moved the plate in his hands, tilting his head, staring into my eyes. I bent down, letting my hair fall around me as I began to eat off the plate, trying to be delicate about it, pushing under the eggs with my tongue, getting a bite into my mouth and chewing it.

Good girl, he stroked my hair down my bare back and kissed the back of my head as I silently ate, feeling the incredible loss of control, wondering how many times Edward had to eat from bowls or plates this way. This was another way for me to know him, to play games like thisI realize he is playing with mebut these ideas come from things that hes experiencedand maybe enjoyed. He wasnt doing the cruel things to me that have been inflicted upon him, that hes silently detested. The praise he gives me of good girlhe likes getting that praise too, good boy. Maybe that soothes him during scenes where he is not in control. Why am I analyzing himI should just enjoy his game and stop thinking so muchmy brain gets in the way all the time. My body is liking this so farmy pussy is already so wet, I cant help it. Do you like it, Bambi?, he kissed my head again and I nodded, keeping my head near the plate as I managed to pick up more of the eggs. Good his fingers kept stroking down my arm and along my hair affectionately, Eat it all up like a good little pet. When I had eaten the last bite of eggs, I licked my lips and looked up at him, not speaking. Lick the plate., he grinned, holding it up in front of me. With a smile, I stuck my tongue out and lapped all the remaining juice and bits of egg off the plate. He smiled at me, watching me as I did this. Men. Good girlnice and clean, he took it away, putting it in the sink and coming back with a bowl. Very good, Bambi he grinned, You deserve a treat. He took a piece of bacon from the bowl and broke it in half, holding it up above my head a bit. Come onget it, Bambi, he coaxed, moving it in a circle above my nose. I smiled a little, opening my mouth and reaching up, my tongue moving up and out to give it a little lick as he chuckled. Jump., he grinned and I bounced up a bit, on my ass, grabbing it in my teeth. He laughed and praised me again, kissing my lips as I chewed my treat. Lets see if you know any tricks or if I have to train you., he took the other bacon half in his fingers and smiled at me, saying, Lay down. I laid myself down into the pillows and smiled down at him. So well behaved, he cooed, placing the bacon right into my mouth then. I carefully swallowed that and then he said, Roll over. With a little giggle, I rolled my body over, like I did before and then rolled back. Wowyou are just so smart, he grinned, sitting me up and feeding me another half bacon piece.

Hold this piece in your mouth but dont eat it., he put an entire piece of bacon between my teeth and I held it, not eating. Then he went to the nightstand and came back with the little egg, showing it to me, asking, Remember this? I gave a little whimper and he smiled, opening my thighs enough to feel in between my legs. Very wet Bambiyou bad little girl., he scolded, easily inserting the egg just inside me. He closed my legs and hit his little remote, leaving it on the nightstand as he walked out of the room. The low buzzing began inside and my fists clenched a little, my voice moaning a little bit as I held the bacon in my teeth. He was washing the dishes and sipping juice in the kitchen as I sat there in bed, letting the little bug inside me work and begin to arouse me even more than being tied naked in bed with Edward in control of me. He was singing something while he cleaned out there and I caught sight of him once in awhile when he took something off the stove. My arms tensed a bit and I struggled them a little as the buzzing began to really win me over now, making me hornier and wetter by the second. My ankles began to jerk uselessly, my toes tensed and curledthen uncurledand curled again. After about ten minutes or so, I was growling and panting like an animal, wishing I could lay back in the bed and roll around a littlemaybe it would help, but I didnt want to be punished for disobeying my owner. I wanted to be a good pet. I tried not to bite down too hard on the bacon but it was becoming increasingly hard to hold it with loose teeth together, not putting too much pressure on it. I jerked my head down as I kept writhing and grunting, whimpering and suffering as the egg wasnt enough to make me come, but enough to stimulate me into a fucking frenzy. I put my palms on the bed and lifted my ass up off the bed slightly, wondering it that would ease thingsit didnt. Be a good girl., he smiled in at me, Ill be there in a few minutes. And he went into the bathroom as I squealed out, crying like a real puppy would. I heard him brushing his teeth and spitting and water running. I began bouncing a little on my ass, trying to kill the thing inside me using pressure. It was ridiculousand would never workbut my brain was mush at the moment. Finally, he was coming back in and I sounded like a damn puppy as he sat on the bed at my side, smiling gently. Whats my pet been up to, hmm?, he asked, taking the end of the bacon into his fingers, saying, Release it. I opened my mouth and he held the entire piece up, smiling at me. Wow, youre good., he praised again, Such restraint, Bambivery good. I kept moaning and panting as he spoke, a mindless creature needing release.

He broke the bacon and dangled it over my nose and I leapt up, taking it, biting into it with eager teeth, still clearly affected by the egg inside me. He ate the other half of the bacon and said, Mmmmtastes like Bella I lunged at him and attacked his mouth with mine, drowning him with my lips and tongue as my voice growled louder, whimpering in need. Finally, he moved my arms back a bit, breaking my kiss from him. Bambi, behave, he smiled, kissing my nose as I struggled a little more, wanting him, Affectionate little thing.so cute. Time to get you ready for the day., he acted like he couldnt see my body about to implode. He had my toothbrush and toothpaste and put some on red paste onto the brush. He dipped the toothbrush into a little cup of water and looked at me, saying, Open, girl. I opened my mouth a little. Wider., he tipped my chin back and I obeyed as he began to brush my lower back teeth, doing both sides, creating a lather of toothpaste. He proceeded to the sides of my teeth and I almost screamed out now from the egg worming away slowly inside me. Together., he said, referring to my teeth as he brushed up and down in the front of my teeth. He held up an empty plastic cup to my mouth and said, Spit, girl. I spit a couple times into it and Edward brought a new little cup of water to my lips, letting me drink a little water from it. Good., he stood up and took all the toothpaste things with him as I nearly screamed. When he came back I wanted to scream his name but stopped myself. Lay down, girl, he eased me back and covered my mouth again, turning my head to the right as he began kissing my neck, Let your master thank you. Now his sweet, wet kisses were driving me more insane with lust as the evil little thing inside me kept its slow pace going. I was groaning and breathing against the tightness of his fingers over my lips as he laid on me, his legs parted and underwear on his ass, keeping me away from what I wanted most. My little pet is very vocal today, he licked up my neck and bit his teeth into the flesh at the bottom of my neck and at the start of my shoulder. My hips were bucking up into his, trying to communicate without words. Stop that., he scolded, his eyes really looking stern, Bad girl. I stopped moving my hips under his and he went about the business of covering my breasts with his kisses now, his hands squeezing and grasping them as I

clenched my eyes, wishing I would explode already and put myself out of my misery. So pretty, he admired, moving his fingers back and forth across my clit, teasingly, just grazing it as I panted and tried not to say anything. Over., he rolled me over again, stroking my ass and kneading it in his hands. His lips opened and closed on my skin and his hands delivered a couple light slaps, getting even more guttural sounds from me. Then he gave me a little bite on my ass cheek, my voice giving a little squeal as he turned me back again, stroking up my thighsknowing damn well how crazy he was driving me. I nearly cried right then but then he took a little pity on me and rolled me on my back again. He kissed my leg and stood up off the bed, taking his time to untie the rope at the leg of the bed and then uncoil the ropes from my ankles. I wanted to part them but kept them together until I was told otherwise. Come., he motioned me with his finger as he sat on the bed, resting against the pillows, sliding his underwear off. I crawled with my knees to him, kneeling between his legs as he smiled at me with lust in his eyes. His penis was rock solid and waiting for me. Please meand Ill please you in return., he vowed. I didnt need to hear anything else and I licked the little bead of clear liquid on the head of his cock as he hissed out loud. My mouth opened and sucked him in hard, my wet tongue swirling around his head tightly as I moved my mouth up and down around him. All the while I pumped him in my wet, hot mouth the little egg moved inside me. I didnt see him reach over and take the little remote but he must have because the egg began to speed up all of a sudden. My hands clenched into fists at my sides, useless to help me with his cock as the pleasure increased and raged inside me like an invisible wave. My voice moaned out loud, vibrating against his penis as he began to make these wonderful, savage noises that turned me on even more. Your mouthFuck, youre an ARTIST!, he growled out above me, Fuck! After ten more minutes, he was grunting and panting and so was I as the egg had made me come for the second time. Stop!, he ordered and I was a little disappointed but obeyed. Turn., he helped spin me around and I bent over, resting my head on the bed as his fingers inserted inside me and removed the egg. I heard him placing the condom on quickly. He was inside me again, forcefully, perfectly. It wasnt very long before Edward shouted out and came like a lion.

Without saying anything, he pulled my head off the bed and laid me on my side in front of him, his arms curled tightly around me, his lips kissing my shoulder blade, teeth biting down slightly as he tried to catch his breath. After a few minutes, he rose to go to the bathroom and clean himself up and he left me lying there for a minute. When he came back, he smiled down at me and said, Lets have you try out a real position, shall we? He grabbed me up by the hair and told me to kneel on the bed, right in the center, a couple feet away from the headboard. Im not sure where he got this rope from but he was an expert with it. He now had my wrists behind me, tied to my ankles, and, from the headboard, a pair of thin, tight ropes sat snugly between my ass cheeks, coming around in front of me, one on each side of my clit, pulling my pussy up high and tied securely to the top of the headboard over my head. And if I let myself relax and my hips lowered, the little thin ropes would dig into my pussy lips, and that both annoyed and excited me at the same time. My back was arched and ached a little bit but I could deal with it for awhile. This was a pretty hard position but I liked it. Until He came back to me and had a little rubber ball in his hand, only a ball. Open., he smiled at me. I opened my mouth and he gently placed the red ball between my teeth. Hold it., he said, Dont drop it, girl. My teeth bit down on it and then he pet my hair affectionately. He inserted the egg inside me again, even though my sounds protested a little. Shhh, he ignored me and turned it on a medium speed as I squealed out. Good girl., he stroked his hand up and down my stomach, This is a nice position for you. It focuses all its attention right here.(he roughly vibrated his fingers up and down my clit as I screamed out)Ill be back in a bitIm going to take a shower. I was growling in an angry way as he walked to the bathroom, leaving me in my sweet misery again. The shower water started running and I closed my eyes, trying to hold my tough position, feeling those ropes digging in a bit more. In minutes, I was coming and screeching like a banshee, gritting my teeth against the rubber ball there as I immediately came right after the last orgasm. This was awesome and torture at the same time. By the time Edward came back out of the shower, I was bucking against the ropes digging into me and howling as if I were on fire, pleading with sounds for mercy. Click., Edward said, almost to himself as he looked at me, drying his hair with a towel , moving it down his wet, naked body.

Aww, Bambido you miss me?, he sat right in front of my upraised clit and began wetly and roughly licking it as I screamed out louder. Through my ball, I was muffled but whimpering, nononoooooo. Bad girl, using words., he said and bit me firmly, making me howl out and come right then. My God, what is wrong with me? Mmmmm, he lapped up the wetness, taking his time as the ropes kept sinking more and more into my lips, only intensifying the sensations. I love the way you taste, he commented as he parted my pussy lips and licked new areas inside, my screams savage and wordless again. He was killing me with pleasure. I thought it would be easy being a pleasure slaveI was wrong. I could sit here all day and eat you over and over again, he said, sucking on the clit now, clutching my ass cheeks, I think I will. By 2pm, I wanted to sleep for a week and couldnt even scream anymore. The egg was now out of me, cleaned and back in the nightstand, and I was in a new position now, back against the headboard, knees tied up against the headboard, too, feet dangling as my legs were wide open. My wrists were tied to the headboard also, and a rope was coiled around my head, between my teeth four times around, gagging me and holding my head to the headboard at the same time. I actually did get a little rest as I was left in this position, my eyes closed for a little bit of time and I almost slept as Edward massaged my feet with a nice lotion, then doing my legs next. All the time, he pleasured me, even though I was tied up and under his control. He was never cruel to me, always caressed and kissed and massaged my body. And just when I thought I was totally relaxed and at peace, he would start pleasuring me all over again, in a new and excruciating way. He was challenging meseeing where my limits were.exploring my submissive fantasies without going too far this first time. I read once that a kind master is always a slave first, and knows how to treat his submissive when he finally has control. Edward as a master is clear proof that he has suffered as a slave. Hes kindand gentlenot callous or wicked just for the sake of being so. I was enjoying being his pet. He massaged my pussy, too, kissing and licking it as his fingers moved around over it. I whimpered, trembling and suddenly he was off and gone again, making me a late lunch. When he came back, he untied the ropes that gagged my mouth and he fed me little pieces of a ham and cheese sandwich, and he let me drink a soda from a straw as my body stayed tied in its position. I still was not allowed to speak and Edward asked, Do you like being my pet, Bambi? And his finger moved up and down my poor little clit again. I nodded, wondering what he had planned for me next. Smiling at me, he untied me completely then stood me up on my feet on the floor, simply tying my wrists together behind my back. He put the red rubber ball

in my teeth again, telling me to hold it, and loosely tied a little rope leash around my neck. I had lots of room in it, it didnt choke me and would not tighten around my neck if pulled. Come on, girl., he coaxed me, using the leash, letting me walk on my feet as he led me to the bathroom, Shower time for you, pet. He led me in the shower and washed me all over with his magical, soapy hands, washed my hair, and then rinsed me all off, drying my body and hair with the big, fluffy towels and leading me by my leash back to bed. Nap time, girl., he said like a loving master, removing the ball from my mouth, laying me face down, removing the leash, and tying my ankles together. He covered me up and joined me in bed, snuggling his face against my arms as he drifted off to sleep. I couldnt believe it but I fell asleep, too, so tired and happy. A couple hours later, when I woke up, it was to the feel of his smooth fingers, playing with my hair, moving down my back, gliding up the curves of my ass. He smiled as he saw me gazing back at him, still not saying a word. Hi., he said, looking a little sad, then lost that look and smiled, touching my face, Did you sleep well, pet? I nodded, closing my eyes for a second or two, then looking at him again. I think Im beginning to feel like Raven a little bit, he said as he moved his fingers over my mouth, I dont want to let you go. But if you want to be released, just say your word and youre free. Alright? I smiled and nodded, wishing I could tell him hes nothing like Raven and never will be. My lips kissed his fingers and I hoped this message got to him. I dont want to be released. Bella, his eyes looked a little sad again as he stared at my face, Im sorry Im so weirdI dont think I even know how to make love like a normal person anymore. When did I become so I hate him talking this way. So I bit his finger to snap him out of it. OW!, he exclaimed, jerking his finger away for a second, BAMBI! BAD! He pointed his finger at me and I licked it, apologizing with a sensual smile as he smiled at me, watching my tongue closely. I slowly curled my tongue over every inch of his finger and kept my eyes on his as I took its entire length into my mouth and sucked wetly. Ugghhhhh, he opened his mouth and squinted at me a bit, Good girlare you sorry? I gave a slow little nod and made my eyes very sorrowful, not letting up on the suction around his finger. Alright, Ill forgive you this time, he grinned, But next time youre getting a good whipping. Edward and I watched a movie together after he made his call to Katie again. Today she didnt sound very interested in Edward and he didnt seem to take any

offense. It was a ten minute call and I thought I saw hurt in his eyes but he smiled at me and said it was no big deal. Burying pain againI wish we could have therapy tonightmaybe later. At one point, Edward was brushing my hair but then he messed it all up again with his hands, letting it fall over my eyes. He said he liked it better that way, sexy, messy bad girl hair, he called it. And now, I was still naked and had my wrists tied together in front of me, tightly with the rope running down and binding my ankles together while Edward stroked me, having me lay between his legs on my back, resting peacefully and quietly as we watched Sweeney Todd together. His hands were in my hair a lot and often traveled down to play with my breasts as I cuddled my cheek on his bare leg, not wanting to be anywhere else in all the world right then. I liked it that not every minute had to be action packed with sex and games.even if I was tied up in his arms, we could still be Bella and Edward, enjoying each other without making a big production out of it. Later, Edward was feeding me chocolate ice cream and kept letting some of it drip off the spoon and down my neck, dotting it over my breasts. Dirty girl, he scolded, laying me down flat on my back as he licked and cleaned me off with his mouth and tongue. Without using words, I planted kisses in his hair right below my mouth and raised my hips up again just once, wanting him again. There is something about being tied up naked all day, not being able to speak, it just kept me completely aroused, even if he wasnt doing much of anything to me at the moment. I wish I had my dog collar with me., he said as he got up from the bed, going into my closet, Thisll work. He found a leather belt I bought for Halloween once that had little silver moons and stars all over it. And he had another one in his hands, too, a thinner, brown one. Nice., he said, coming back to me and rolling me face down, looping the belt around my neck, securing it snugly but not tight enough to restrict my breathing. Then he used one of my scarves to blindfold me and without a word, he untied my bound ankles and slapped my ass hard, saying, Doggie styleget on all fours. I quickly felt my bound hands to the bed and got on my knees, parting my legs, my hands palm down on the bed in front of me. Stay, girl., he said, and I felt the thinner belt around my pelvis, right above my clit. He tightened it pretty well and it almost dug into my skin a bit, but I just gave a little yelp at that. I heard him unwrapping a condom again and placing it on. He gave a couple tugs on the belt behind me, halfway down across my ass cheeks and my knees actually rose off the mattress a couple times. I felt both his hands grab the belt at my ass and he lifted my pussy up again, placing the tip of his cock right against me, not entering yet. Fuck your master, girl., he ordered and I bent my head, easing my pussy backwards so he slipped inside my ready, wet lips.

We both gave a groan of pleasure as we joined and then Edward was controlling my hips with the belt, riding me like a human pony, using the reigns to slam my ass against his waist as he fucked me without mercy. I really wish I hadnt made all those fuck me harder comments last night. I was paying for it now. I love my little wet bitch, he growled and pounded deep inside me, and then his fist grabbed my hair in back, yanking my face backwards as I panted and groaned out louder, mindless. We had so much fun after that, we didnt even have dinner. I had fallen asleep at one point of the night, still tied up and blindfolded, and we woke me up with an ice cold water bath, using ice cubes, water and a cloth to stimulate me awake. He knelt in front of me and put his penis into my mouth and controlled me by my hair, moving me back and forth as I tried to breathe and keep pace with his directions. I swallowed all of him down that time and I was spanked for falling asleep. It was a lovely spanking, he used his hands and I whimpered in shame as he disciplined me. I stayed awake in the dark silence after that, even though he lay next to me naked, stroking my pussy and breasts under the covers. He was spooned behind me as my blindfold remained on, as well as the ropes around my wrists and ankles. About an hour later, I felt his erection behind me and I was glad I had stayed awake. He whispered to me, Are you awake, pet? I nodded and without moving his position, his fingers opened my legs a bit, giving his cock access to penetrate me again. This time, we moved slowly and his hands guided my hips as he rocked in and out of meI let out a very happy sigh and smiled. Sex is so fucking fantastic. Im glad I have such an amazing teacher. Afterwards, he held me so tight I almost felt his pain in my own skin. He was thinking of leaving me next week and I knew it. Tears came to my eyes as I spoke to him in my mind. Dont be afraid, Edward. Im not letting you go. Ill never let anyone hurt you again. We fell asleep a few minutes later and, against my will, bad images kept creeping up in my dreams. Images of Victoria coming here to get Edward, holding a gun; another one of Edward walking in here alone one afternoon while I was at school and men diving on him from behind, handcuffing him and taking him back to Victoria without even letting him say goodbye to me or leave a noteI pictured Edwards poor face as he looked at Victoria through the bars of a cageshe was taunting him, telling him he was never leaving her. Then I dreamt of Raven and Victoria teaming up to torture him for fun and I almost got sick. Victoria struck at Edwards bare back with a whip and blood flew out of the new lash as he threw his head back and howled in agony. Bella, wake up!, I heard and was being shaken when my eyes opened and I gasped, still tied up in Edwards arms.

Bella, he stroked my face and hair, You were having a bad dreamabout me, it sounded likeare you okay? I was shivering but so glad I had been dreaming it Want me to untie you?, he began to move to my ankles, Maybe its too much, sleeping this way. It took me a little getting used to at first No., I jerked my ankles away from his hands, I like it. You do?, he asked, not convinced. I like being your pet., I snuggled myself in his arms and closed my eyes, But tomorrow I have work to do so no trying to distract me. What work?, he asked. Finding your way out., I reminded, Whatd you think I was joking? Bella, he began but I didnt want to hear his warnings of its no use right now. Shhhsleep, Edwardand hold me, I suggested, feeling him lay down and cuddle against my back with his chest, his face touching my hair in back of my head. I love the way you feellaying with me like thisin case I never told you before, I confessed, I am so in love with you A long pause lay between us and I almost thought Edward wasnt going to answer until he said. I guess that means I am someone after all, his voice was so low and quiet, he sounded afraid to say the words, as if somehow Victoria would hear him growing a self worth in secret. There is hope for you yet, Mr. Cullen, I yawned, drifting off to sleep.

Tuesday, Day 9 EPOV The next day when I woke up, I frowned, hearing womens voices in the next room. Opening my eyes, I saw the bedroom door was closed and I looked beside me in the bed. Bella was gone, the ropes were gonehow the hell did she get out of that? She is in so much trouble. I got up and grabbed my jeans that laid in a ball in the corner. I also put a t-shirt on, not wanting to show my marks to any other company Bella had in the next room. I could hear Bellas voice more distinctly than the other voices and it sounded like she was on the phone, saying, I cant give you any names. I would just like to remain anonymous, if thats alright. I opened the bedroom door and saw a little operations center at work right there in the kitchen and living room.

Rosalie sat on the sofa, typing on her laptop, and was also talking on a hands free cell phone. Alice was sitting at the kitchen counter, also on her laptop, holding her cell phone and not talking, it looked as if she were on hold with someone. Bella smiled at me and waved without saying anything and Rosalie turned to me, giving me a very friendly smile. Im glad I put my shirt on. Alice smirked, acting like she didnt notice me and kept typing on her computer. Bella., I whispered, frowning a little. She was already dressed and pointed at a plate on the stove. A little stack of pancakes waited for me but thats not what I wanted. Bella., I didnt move, trying to get her attention. She put a finger up, and said to the person on her phone, Well, alright, lets call him Antonio, then, if you have to have a name. Antonio? I pulled at her t-shirt at the bottom, feeling like an annoying child, hoping she was almost finished on this call. She tapped my hands away and I sighed, giving up and going to the kitchen for some orange juice. I was starving after skipping dinner last night, so I took the plate of food and sat across from Alice at the kitchen counter, sitting in the area in the living room, as she sat in the kitchen side. Alice made a little room for me and gave me another polite smile, waving with her fingers at me. I waved back, pouring syrup on my pancakes. Alright, thank you., Bella was saying and I looked over at her, hopeful she was getting off the phone now. She did hang up and came over to me, putting her arms around me and kissing my cheek. Good morning Ed she began but I cut her off. What are you doing?, I asked, my voice low, I didnt want to yell or seem ungrateful. Were making some calls and starting my new mission the Were getting Edwards ass out of Victorias clutches mission., she informed. Bella, please stop wasting your time., I only asked, No bureau or non profit organization is going to help me. The situation is totally fucked and believe me, if there were a way out, Id have found it by now, dont you think? Edward, her voice sounded hurt. Im not angry at you, sweetie., I wanted to make that clear as I turned to her and put my arms around her waist, I love that you want to help me, really. But this is a waste of timebesides, if we make enough calls, Victoria is bound to find out somehow. Were not giving your name or anything., Bella pointed out. And how is it going so far?, I raised a brow, How long have you been at this, you three? Since 7., her eyes looked solemn.

I peeked at the clock. Its eleven now. Four hourshow is it going? Terrible., she admitted, No one careswe keep getting transferred, redirected, disconnected Where is superman when you need him?, I teased, smiling, hoping shed cheer up and realize our day would be better spent outside. I wanted to take her on a boat and see her in her bikiniand swim all day with her. Ive got my superman., she kissed my lips, I just need to find Victorias kryptoniteand Im going to find it. People dont care about the problems of prostitutes, Bella., I said, honestly, They figure we chose this life and whatever comes of it, its our problem. Police find dead hookers all the time in this city and they dont even investigate that much. Were shadowsugly, unwanted shadows. I sighed again and guessed I wasnt going to have Bella all to myself today. Damn. Bella didnt answer me, but her eyes were hurting me with their disappointmenttheir hopelessness. Are you guys going to be doing this all day today?, I wondered out loud. We only have five days left, Edward., Bella reminded me, as if I needed that horrid information, Im going to keep working until I find you a way out. But, Bella, were wasting our time together., I pointed out, feeling selfish and unappreciative, Pleaselets just have another nice day out somewhere togetherI loved that the other day, didnt you? Yes, and I want more days like that with you, thats why Im doing this now., she insisted stubbornly. You really think that youre going to fix my life in five days?, I put it this way to make her see my point. I held her hands and kissed them, seeing the look in her eyes. I dont want you putting all this pressure on yourself, Bella., I said, Its so impossiblebelieve melets just please enjoy our time left together. No., she said and tears came to her eyes, I wont give up on you, Edward. I dont want you going back to her. Shes gonna hurt you again. She hurts my body., I looked dead serious into her eyes, But she cant touch me in here. I put her hand on my heart and gave her a little smile, wishing shed smile, too. You gave that to me, Bella., I whispered, I want time with you. Please. Time is all I have. She nearly cried and I saw her chin trembling. How about this?, I suggested, I will go have a good workout at the gym with Emmett for a couple hours and you can keep workingand when I come back, we can go on a normal dateno bookstores or anythingIll be the perfect gentleman. Anywhere you want to go She agreed to this plan and I felt so relieved.

Smile, Bella., I almost asked as she gave me a weak little grin. I kissed her and grabbed my things, calling Emmett on his cell on the way to the train. Even when I left, the little office Bella had created was still hard at work. I felt so touched inside as I watched them and I raised my voice a bit, calling all of them, Ladies? They all stopped and looked at me and I put a hand on my chest, bowing my head a bit, hoping they knew how sincere I was when I said, Thank you all. I got their smiles in return and they only paused a moment, watching me leave them to it. I had two more friends nowAlice and Rosalie. As I walked down the stairs, I just heard Bella say one thing to her friends. Im done playing with people who dont care., she said, Its time to call the ones who DO.

19 EPOV What do you MEAN?, Emmett was staring at me as I tried not to look at his face, my hands laced behind my head, continuing my sit ups at a very fast pace. Just forget I said it, alright?, I sighed, knowing he wouldnt drop it. He stopped my sit ups by forcing his hand to my chest and he laid me down flat, my head thudding against the mat beneath it. Ow., I half-frowned up at him. You cant love her, Edward., Emmett reminded me of my one rule, You cant love anyoneanyone but Victoria. I told you that on day one! I didnt say I was going to marry her or anything, I just said, I love herthats all., I informed, Im not going to do anythingon Monday, Ill be kneeling in my room, waiting for Victoria, so dont worry. Edward, youre being so stupid, Emmett looked worried about me, not really angry, Do you want to be sold to Raven? Shut up., I frowned now, And dont ever tell Bella anything about that, either. Once I leave, she wont follow me. Shell hate me, so nothing is going to happen. Ill be Victorias obedient little machine again, just like old times. What do you mean, shell hate you?, Emmett let me continue my sit ups. Victoria said if Bella ever came around me again that shed ruin Bella, even hurt her. I cant let that happen. When I leave Bellas, I have to do something so horrible that shell loathe me and never want to see me again. That way I ensure she wont come looking for me at Fire. Like what?, Emmett asked. I had one thought., I stopped my sit ups and hated even thinking about it. What?

I make a pass at Rosalieor Alice., I said, feeling nauseous, Im sure they wouldnt take me up on it, but theyll tell Bellaor maybe I can do it so Bella catches mebut I dont want to endanger her friendshipsno, it would be better for her friend to turn me down, slap me or something, then Bella sees it. You will have to help me out on this one, Em. Finebut use Alice, not Rosalie., Emmett suggested. Bella is more jealous of Rosalies looks, though., I pointed out. It doesnt matterif you hit on any friend of hersor even a strangerBellas gonna get mad, Emmett said. Yea, youre probably right., I agreed, Okay, Alice. Rosalie might say yes to me, too, and that wouldnt help my plan any. As if., Emmett scoffed. Hey, Rosalie was sucking on my finger the first night I met her at Fire., I boasted. Well, you dipped your frigging hand halfway into her drink!, Emmett argued. You like her, dont you?, I asked, seeing it in his face. Yea, I do., Emmett said, But I wont call her again. I didnt let myself get too close to herand Ill never let myself get close enough to LOVE herDOPE! I know., I looked at my sneaker, If only it wasnt for all the times she wanted to talk to meI couldve made things all about sex and I wouldve been fine. I know I sound like a giant girl, butshe cared for me. Shes quietand soft soundinglike a mandolinnot loudnot rough. She wasnt just using me You didnt tell her anything aboutVictoriawhat she isdid you?, Emmett gave me a grave stare. No., I breathed, frowning, Never. Id never put Bellas life in danger that way. Good. Dont., he said, but he didnt have to tell me that. Thats one secret I would never tell anyone. I hated thinking about it myself, even in private. Hey, you could always tell Bella you and I are lovers., Emmett laughed, putting an arm around my neck, trying to lean in and kiss my cheek as I struggled him away. UGH!!, I shouted, repulsed, Get off me, you giant homo! What the hells with you? He laughed and let me go, teasing, Youre too small for me, anywayyou couldnt handle me, little girl. Are you trying to make me vomit?, I asked, moving myself further away from Emmett, putting some space between our asses as we went back to doing our sit ups. I had to burn off those DoritosVictoria was going to kick my ass for that.

BPOV

Edward, session seven., I hit my record button and looked across me at the porcelain face smiling back at me, Hi Edward. Hi Dr. Bella., he showed teeth as his smile widened, then straightened his expression a bit, ready for whatever I had planned for him this time. Remember the first session, Edward, that we had here?, I asked. Of course., he grinned. Youreally laid yourself across that sofa as I recall., I reminded, seeing his eyes look at the vast, empty remainder of the couch, then back to me, Remember that? Yes., he looked down at his knee and then sheepishly brought his eyes to mine, I was bad. I thoughtif I could distract you with my bodyyoud forget the whole therapy thing. I guess I had no idea who I was dealing with at the time. I chuckled at his confession, glad to hear him admit it. Me, either., I admitted, adding, I really have done you a terribleservice, Edward. His face frowned and stared back at me, not liking my tone or my words, I couldnt be sure which. It is so unprofessional for meto try to counsel youand thenbe with youthe way I have been, I was stumbling through my point. Are you saying you regret sleeping with me?, he asked and I felt my whole chest get hot and tight. NO!, I shouted it before I knew I was doing itand Edwards body relaxed a bit, but his face was still hard. No, Edward, of course not., I assured him, Ive never been happier, EVER, than these last days with you. And I think you actually charged me too littleI shouldve paid more I winced at what I just said but Edward laughed and crossed his arms, tilting his head to the side, watching me blush. I know., he said, But I liked youfrom the first time I saw you, writing in your notebook while I was trying to get your attention in my cage. Dont think that didnt hurt my ego, you knowthere I was almost naked and grinding against the bars of my cage and you didnt even glance up at me. So I had to steal that notebook and shove it down my pants to get your attention I had to laugh, remembering. I was so scared of you, I let out a breath, I saw youevery move you made. You wereand AREthe most beautiful thing Ive ever seen. I was pretending to write in my notebook. I was so afraid. If I looked up and you looked back at meI dont knowI was different then. You changed me, you know. He gave a small, tender smile and took a moment to respond. Youve changed me, too, Bella., he kept looking into my eyes and the look nearly burned me inside.

I was just trying to say, earlier, that maybe if I had stayed professional, maybe I couldve helped you moredone something differently, I shrugged. Bella, he leaned forward and waited until I looked into his face, First off, I wouldnt have stayed if you refused to sleep with me. See, theres one way Ive changed. Back then, I wouldve left if you didnt make that deal with me, to give me equal time. I wanted you and I felt I wouldnt be doing my job if I didnt perform for you. I didnt want to cheat you. Its different now. Youre not a job, Bella. I like talking to you as well as fucking yousorrymaking love to you. I guess my mouth hasnt changed much, but, I have loved my time with Dr. Bella. You are a very intelligent doctor and I really do feel like you have helped meso much. Just because my entire life hasnt changed into some pretty little picture doesnt mean you havent done a good job counseling me. Do you know what a gift it is for someone like me to just happen to have two weeks with not only a hot girl whos very sensual and passionate, but also one who wants to be a psychiatrist and wants to help me? I never believed in ghosts or spirits before, but I keep thinking that Tanya mustve set us up. Im never this lucky on my own. It has to be some kind of divine intervention or something., he said, looking a little embarrassed, finishing his speech. I felt my eyes begin to turn wet and I blinked them away, making myself smile a little bit in return to his kind words. Thank you, Edward., I breathed the words, not sure if I could speak that well right now without crying, Im still not finished, though. I actually did get somewhere today after you left. Really?, he looked concerned, What happened? Cant tell you yet., I teased, Youll see soon enough. Bella, youre scaring me., he almost frowned, What have you done? Relax., I opened my notebook, clicking my pen, You worry too much. He looked very nervous but I stuck to my guns. Saving him was going to be difficult enough without him fighting my methods. I hoped he wouldnt come to hate me for the drastic measures I had to take, but I wasnt changing my course now. So, Edward, I asked, What would you like to talk about today? Well, there has been something on my mind, he said, But I dont think youll want to talk about it. Im Dr. Bella, Edward., I said with a grin, I will talk about anything with you. Alright., he took a breath, Ive been wonderinghow Im going to feel when I have to leave here. He was being so honest and I appreciated ithe wasnt so closed up like he used to bebut why did his eyes have to show so much? He was right to be afraidafraid to believe I would save him. If I screwed up, and failed himhe would be devastatedand so would I. So he wasnt even letting himself hope. Youre not leaving here, Edward., I stated, feeling like a warden. He scoffed and smiled and said, Bellawe both know I have to leave here on Sunday, lets not pretendthis is therapy. I thought you wanted truth.

I threw my notebook on the table and felt angry at him now. You know, I said with venom in my voice, I think you really want to go back. I think youre scared to death Im gonna find some way out for you. He gave a little laugh and I got more pissed off. Im scared?, he asked, almost in a mocking way. Yes., I squinted my eyes, Getting free from Victoria is easy compared to what youd have waiting for you then. Number one repairing the damaged relationship you have with your daughter. His face turned to stone and his eyes blazed again, almost darkening with their sudden anger. Its not damaged!, he defended. Edward, you call her once a day, you havent seen her in years., I pointed out, Little children need your constant presence to feel close to youyou do have years of work ahead in becoming her father again if you ever put yourself back into her life. And the longer you wait, the harder its going to be. He looked down at his knees and didnt fight back on that point. I suddenly felt like another woman whipping him as he just sat there and took it. Number two would be looking for a job., I tried to say gently but firmly, wanting to show him why he was so resisting my attempts to free him. And you would have to find a good job, maybe even two of them for awhile, I said, If you want to keep taking care of Katie and yourself without the easy income I threw that in to see if he would fight backI wanted him to. He had to start learning how to fight backhe could practice here with me. EASY?!, his eyes looked murderously at me now and I almost trembled. Well, you said yourself no real job would pay you 50,000 dollars for one day of work., I reminded. Yea,, he almost let out a crazed persons laugh, And I also wouldnt have to get fucked up the ass for two hours with ten different dildos, either, Ill bet!! Or have needles driven through my cock!! Or lets not forget the easy fun of having a man wash your body and hose you off like a zoo animal afterwards, right before youre locked into a goddamn BOX for the night to REST!! I EARN every cent they pay me, BELLA!! EASY! I love it when you get mad, Edward., I smiled at his face, Dont you see how free you feel after you let that poison out of you? For a minute, he just stared at me, opening his mouth a couple times, nothing coming outfinally, he let a little smile show and he muttered. You are so sneaky., he shook his head, And so good. You dont really think I find your life easy, I hope., I said, wanting so badly to hold him.

No. he grabbed his hair with his hands, hiding his face from me, I know you just want to help me, BellaI know. I want you to help yourself, Edward., I said, I wanted so badly this morning for you to get out your cell phone and sit down with us, helping us make our calls. But I know thats a lot to ask youso soon. Its not just me, Bella., he said, If I run, the people I love will pay. And now youre included in that unfortunate group. I have to go back to her. Shes very powerful, more than you know. She can kill us all if she wanted. I really am honored that you want to help me butIm trapped. I cant go anywhere. Cant we just let it be? Leave it alone. No., I said without emotion, Thats not an option for me. I was born to fix thingspeopleproblemsIll always want to do that. And its even more complicated now that I love you. Im honored to be part of the unfortunate group of people you love. I justHAVE to save yousimple as that. And I will, Edward, and Im not afraid of her. I would gladly risk my life for you, you know that, right? You are right now., he said with a dark voice. My father risks his life everyday, doing whats right., I said proudly, I was raised to have courage, blame my dad for that. Edwards eyes became shiny as he looked at me and said, I wish I was something like thatthat my daughter could look up to. You are, Edward., I said and he cringed, looking away, not wanting to believe me. I dont know anyone who has endured so much pain and agony all for the sake of someone they love like you do, Edward., I said with a hard voice, wanting him to hear me and understand his sacrifices, Youve bled for Katieyouve given your body and soul for heryouve sold your own flesh so that she could have hers again. Every day, every thing you do screams love and courage, Edward. You see me with these romantic glasses, Bella, he wiped his eyes, taking a deep breath, And I like the way you make me soundbut if Katie ever found out what I was, I think Id kill myself. My heart stopped. I kept my calm and asked, Have you hadthoughts about that a lot? His eyes touched mine and he told me the truth straight out. Yes, Bella, he said, Ive wanted to kill myselfbut I cantnot until Katie is alright again. Wait., I felt my eyes widen, Youre planning on doing this.someday? No., he said but I didnt believe him, I meant, I cant do thatKatie needs me. Oh my God. Suicide. Im supposed to let James know if he talks about suicide. But he just denied it, didnt he? If I dont tell James and something happens to Edward

Bella, honestly, he shook his head, trying to convince me, That was dumb of meI didnt mean that. I dont want to kill myself. Really. But you have to admit, it is a definite way out. What do you see when you look into your future?, I asked, Five years from nowor ten? He thought for a minute, not saying anything and I was getting so scared. He doesnt see a future for himself. I dont know., he said, Its not up to me. I dont know what next week will hold, let alone, five years from now. I expect once my looks fade and I get older, Victoria wont want me anymore. And then Ill be free. Maybe then I can move to Florida and work for Ben at his factory. And I can start trying to get to know Katie again, if she wants me to. Floridathank you. Now I know where to look to find Ben. Factorythat might be a good clue also. Edward didnt even notice that he just told me things that before he had hidden from me. Why does Victoria own you?, I asked, I mean, does she own anyone else at the clubor otherwise? No, just me., he said. Why you?, I asked and he looked up at me, I mean, I know youre amazing, and if I could own you, Id draw up the papers right nowbutwhy does she want full possession of you? Did she ever say? She told me in the beginning I was special., he shrugged, She says that all the timebut she doesnt say why Im so damn special. There must be something about you, I stood and paced, talking to myself, A reason she wants you so muchit cant just be your looks Hey, is that a personal parade or can anyone march in it?, he teased, smirking at me. Your father is a doctor, is that right?, I asked him, if I remembered correctly. His face went blank again, a glint of anger in his eyes. My father is a prick., he corrected, But yes, Dr. Prick. What about your mother?, I asked, stopping my pacing. Shes Mrs. Prick., he said then sighed, Shes just a doctors wife, she has no big career or anything. Theres more to this than meets the eye., I said to Edward and he looked confused, I think theres some big, secret reason she has to own YOUabove all others She says she loves meonce in awhile, Edward shared, almost ashamedly, On my birthday and at Christmastime Do you believe her?, I asked, without judging. Maybe he loves her, in some wayno, he said he hated her the other day. I felt relieved and horrible at the same time.

Not always., he looked down at his hands, But once in awhileshe says it real niceand I almost do I didnt say anything, wondering how it must feel for him, living in a world where Victoria is the only one who shows you any loveno wonder hes thought about killing himself. After a long pause, I decided enough therapy for today. I will do a long session tomorrow. Where would you like to go on our date, Edward?, I asked, smiling and slowly coming over to him on the sofa. I straddled his hips with my legs and sat on his lap, taking his face into my hands, placing a small kiss on those full, glorious lips. He smiled, relieved my hard questions and observations were over for now and he curled his arms around me, holding me closer, planting a warm kiss on my throat. I told youits your choice tonightanywhere you want to go., he tickled my neck as he spoke, his hot breath playing against my skin. I dont know, I smiled, Everywhere we go, we seem to end up making love thereIm afraid to pick a placeIm even afraid to take you food shopping with me now Are you complaining again?, he moved to the other side of my neck, just making small, little touches with his mouth that melted me instantly. I was such putty in his hands always. I giggled, saying, No, I know theres no complaint department. Theres lots of wonderful departmentsbut no complaint department. He hugged me and rubbed up and down my back as he kissed my lips again, briefly but longer than the tiny kisses he scattered across my neck a second ago. Did you like me being in control last night?, he whispered near my left ear, kissing it and taking my earlobe into his teeth. God, yes, I whispered back, closing my eyes, You gave me 24 hours of constant pleasureand it nearly killed me. We both laughed and his eyes twinkled as he looked up at my face, his perfect teeth nearly shined and my heart skipped a beat or two. I love you, Bella., he said, his right hand cupping my cheek, No matter what happens, I will always love you. Ill always love you, too, Edward., I said without missing a beat, meaning every word. Tonight, Im not a toy., he said with a very serious voice, his eyes piercing into mine, Im a man escorting you out for a date. Edward Cullen. And if Im a good date, and you invite me up, I want to make love to you like a real man. No games or ropes or eggsjust meand youis that alright?

Youve never been a toy to me, Edward Cullen., I responded, stroking his hair and face, treating him as the treasure he is, And every time we make love, Im making love to a real man. But, yes, if youre a good dateI may invite you up. He smiled at me and the whole world ceased existing. On our first date?, he asked, slightly shocked. I laughed, If I want you, I dont care if its the first date or the 101st. Im a sexual creature now, not a quivering mouse. Ive been taught by the master, Edward Cullen. Congratulations., he said, You are now a graduate of the Edward Cullen Institute for the Future Bad Girls of America. Letting out a huge laugh, I agreed, Yes, Im very badbut youd better be good. Thats the only way into my bed tonight. I will be good, then, or Ill be sleeping on the steps tonight., he chuckled. Do you even know how to be good?, I joked. Perhaps, when I must., he answered, So now all you have to do is tell me where youd like to go. I didnt really want to go anywhere fancy where Id have to get all dressed up, and I knew he only had casual clothes with him here, so I decided something clich and easy. How aboutdinner and a movie?, I suggested. Too easy., he said. Is that a new nickname for me?, I laughed as he gave a gasp, muttering how terrible a comment that was for me to make of myself.

BPOV A knock tapped on my door and I smiled, fastening my earring and checking myself in the mirror. Not too bad. I was wearing makeup and my nice diamond earrings Charlie bought me for Christmas last year. I went with a nice skirt and a short sleeved sweater, one inch heels. Pretty but not overly sexy. This was a first date, after all. I went to the door and smiled at what I saw there. A very handsome gentleman stood there in a gray cable knit sweater and black slacks, dress shoes and a single red rose in his hand, adorned with a little spray of babys breath. Hi, Im Edward Cullen., he smiled, dazzling the shit out of me, I hope youre Bella Swan. I smiled like a goofball and for reasons I didnt know, I almost felt my legs give out. I would expect it if I just met Edward, but I hadnt. I hade made love to him in so many different wayswhy now did it feel like we were total strangersin a very romantic, exciting way? I am., I felt my cheeks get hot, Would you like to come in for a sec?

Sure, thanks., he waited for me to step back and open the door further. He entered, keeping his eyes on me and handing me the rose, This is for you. Its beautiful., I took it with a timid hand and brought it to my nose, smelling it with a grin. He smiled at me and said, It is now. Oh my God. Would it be bad of me to tackle him to the floor now? Nice place., he commented, looking around, hands behind his back. Thanks., I blushed again, Im not all that great on decorating, butits not a bad place. I like your stools., he gave a little smirk, and I almost smirked back at him. So do Ilately., I gave a little nervous laugh, getting a vase out of the cabinet, turning the kitchen faucet and putting some water into it. He looked at me, as if asking what I meant and I just said, Private joke. His lips did that little pout again, I think he was trying not to laugh. So, what movie are we seeing?, I asked out of curiosity, going to the sofa to get my purse. The Philadelphia Story., he replied and I felt my mouth fall open a bit. Whats wrong?, he asked. Nothing., I smiled, I just expected something likeI dont know, a new movieguys usually love explosions and action and cars He smiled more and said, Not me. I love black and white films. Pure, simplehonestwithout the sleaze of todays movies. Do you prefer something newer? Oh, no., I quickly denied, I totally agree with you. I love old movies. And I love Jimmy Stewart. Me too., he grinned, Most people just know him from Its a Wonderful Life, but thats not even his best work. I know!, I agreed and thought how strange Ive been with Edward all this time and never knew this stuff about him. A dark part of me almost scoffed and said he was playing another role for mebut I dismissed that idea and really believed him. I love Mr. Smith Goes to Washington, too., I said, But I havent seen that since I was a teenager. Well, perhaps if we have a second date, we could see that next., he charmed the panties off me. I would love that., I smiled, shivering a little. He didnt say anything, but we shared a silent look between us, both wishing this is how wed really metand that we were these carefree characters we were playing, with no worries and no obstacles in our way.

Shall we go, then, Bella?, he said at last, If its alright, I thought wed walk. The movie theatre is just a few blocks away and its beautiful out. I love walking., I agreed, letting him open the door for me as we left my place. Be careful on these stairs., I said as I began to descend them, There are sometimes shady characters lurking around here, waiting to jump on unsuspecting women after they get their mail. He almost laughed but then said, Dont worry, Bella. Ill protect you. Thanks., I held the door for him and we were outside in the nice, cool evening breeze, on the strangely quiet sidewalk, walking side by side. I love how the air felt moving my hair back away from my shoulders as I stole a glance at my blind date, loving the way he lookedand smelledand talked. So, you go to NYC, huh?, he asked about my college. Yea., I admitted, I love it there. Im majoring in Psychiatry. I went there, too., he said, Before I went to medical school. I almost didnt know what to sayI knew this part was fiction but I didnt want to ruin it for either of us. Thats part of the reason I agreed to a blind date., he said next, walking at a nice slow, even pace, as if not rushing to get there too soon, Im stuck in the ER all the time, I never get a chance to meet women unless theyre bleeding and screaming. I gave a little laugh and said, No, please, no bleeding, no screamingIm very squeamish. Id hate to pass out and miss the movie. Bella, you wont miss a thing., he said, giving me a smileand I wondered what he meant by that. Before I could analyze it, he laughed and added, I meant that as a compliment. I noticed he walked beside me, but didnt get too close, he never touched me, as if this was a real first date and we had never met before. It was niceI was enjoying myself, much to my surprise. Once in the little sleepy movie theatre, Edward made me laugh by getting us all the junk food he could buy us. Popcorn with lots of real butter, sodas the size of beer pitchers, and lots of candy filled our arms as we went to the only theatre in the place and looked for a good seat. It wasnt very hard. There was only two other people in the movie, in separate seats. Hmmm, Edward stood there, conflicted, not moving. What?, I grinned at him. Well, this is a very important moment, Bella., he informed, And it may decide our whole future togetherif we have one. What are you talking about?, I giggled. Where you prefer to sit., he said, as if it shouldve been obvious, If you sit in the middle, it means you play it safe and go along with the status quo, willing to

be one of the sheep. If you sit in the frontwellthats justwrong. Thats for old ladies who cant see and retarded children. Oh, but the back is the cool place to sit, right?, I asked, wise to his motives, Or is it for those who want people to think theyre cool and have insecurity issues? No., he quickly snapped back as I laughed. If you sit in the back, then it means you love to relax and enjoy standing back and watching classic movie moments unfurl on their own without crowding them., he said. I just shot him a look and he smiled. And, also, its a great place to make out., he chuckled. Well, then my choice is clear., I walked to the last row and walked into it, sitting in the middle of the row. He was behind me, smiling, without saying anything else, setting our sodas in their holders in the arm of our seats. Good choice, Bella., he whispered as the lights went down. The movie was beyond wonderful. The dialogue was beautifully old fashioned and every word was almost like poetry to me. Gentleman Edward never tried to make a pass or hold my hand, even as we watched the story unfold. The love scene between James Stewart and Katherine Hepburn came and I just melted as he said to her, Theres a magnificence in you, Tracy. A magnificence that comes out of your eyesand your voice, and the way you stand there, and the way you walkyoure lit from within, Tracy. Youve got fires banked down in youhearth fires and holocausts! I looked at Edward and knew exactly what those words meantEdward is like that for me. And when I looked at himhe was looking at me, too. But I didnt take my eyes away from himI held his gaze as the actors kept talking to each other. His hand found mine on the arm of my chair and he laid his upon it, gently curling around itand I started to feel hot and a little sweaty suddenly. This is magic! I dont seemtoo made of bronze?, Tracy asks. This was something her asshole father called her, a tough woman back then scared men and he said she wasnt real, she was made of bronze, because she was smart and strong. I could relate to that. A lot of boys saw me as a bookworm, not a girl to date. But Edward was different. He seemed to SEE me No, youre flesh and blood he says to her, Thats the blank, unholy surprise of it. Youre the golden girl, Tracyfull of life and warmth and delight. Edwards face was moving so slowly I didnt even know he was moving until he was almost nose to nose with me What goes on, youve got tears in your eyes?, James Stewart asks Tracy. And I felt tears in my eyes. And a half second later, I felt the most innocent, intense kiss I had ever known.

I lost track of the actors on the screen for awhile but our kiss deepened. I felt no tongue, though, this was a gentlemans first kissand I loved it. I felt like I was in an old movie now. On screen, the lovers were kissing, too, and just as we finished our kiss, I heard Katherine Hepburn breathe, GollyGolly Moses Edward and I both laughed, still looking at each other. We didnt say anything to each other, but he held my hand all through the rest of the movieand it was the most incredible feeling. It was nothingbut everything. Jimmy Stewart then asks Tracy if this could be love and she says, no, it cant be. And he asks her, Would it be inconvenient? Terribly!, she answers, then later, she says, Were out of our minds! I smiled a little, understanding this too. Its amazing how you can relate to a movie made so long ago, today in 2009. But I got the message. Love isnt always convenient, fitting perfectly into your schedule. I found myself saying a little prayereven if Edward would find it a waste of timethere has to be someone somewhere who can hear meand understandand show me the way. Please. The movie ended and Edward hadnt tried doing anything sexual to me in the lonely, dark theatre. I almost wondered if he would try something. This was a perfect setting for some semi-public scenebut he remained my considerate dateand I had to admit, it was nice. As we left the theatre, Edward was still holding my hand, saying, They dont make movies like that anymore. Hell, they dont have actors like that anymore. I know., I agreed, Although I do love Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan movies Yea, they do have something when theyre together, dont they?, he grinned at me, I wonder if theyve ever been togetherin private. I just laughed a little at that and gave his hand a little squeeze, hoping he read that message as I love this date and you are doing so well, Edward. Where are we going now?, I asked after a little pause between us. Theres a great little place a few blocks down that I thought youd like., he informed, giving a nod forwards, Its Italian. Do you like Italian? Are you kidding?, I asked, Its my favorite. I live for a good marinara sauce and mozzerella cheese. Oh, the sauce here is to die for., he smiled more, showing those gleaming white teeth. We talked about our favorite parts of the movie on the way to the restaurant and when we got there, Edward asked for a nice, quiet table, slipping the hostess a folded up bill. He touched the small of my back as we were taken to a little round table in a dimly lit corner. He pushed my chair in for me and then he sat across from me, opening his menu.

Im not going to be one of those guys who tells his date what she should order., he said right out, I think that is an insult. You have a mind and you can choose for yourself. I like a woman who can think for herself. I smiled at him and thought that comment just earned him about 1,000 points. Well, thank you, Edward., I replied, looking over my menu, Ive always hated it when men order my food for me. It makes me feel like Im five years old. He grinned and gave a single nod of his head. When the waitress came over, Edward ordered himself a good ordinary spaghetti and meatballs with lots of sauce and garlic bread for both of us, and a coke. I liked that he wasnt trying to impress me by ordering some fancy meal or an expensive wine. I ordered the same thing as he did, really wanting that for myself before he ordered, and then I silently scolded myself for not being the woman who could choose and think for herself. He just smiled at me as the waitress left and looked around him. Do you like it here, Bella?, he asked, a true gentleman. Yes, very much., I answered, sipping my water, Its very cozy and I feel comfortable here. Some restaurants make me nervous. I got the feeling you didnt like to be wined and dined., he observed. Edward?, I looked up into his eyes, Can I justsay one thingfor a second? He looked a little confused but said, Sure., anyway. I didnt really help you much, earlier, when you asked me how you were going to handle it when you had to leave., I broke character because it had been bothering me all night. He asked me for guidance and I didnt give any. I just stomped my foot and said he wasnt leavingwhen I didnt really know that for sure. Bella, he looked a little scared. The truth is, I took a breath, I dont know what to say to that. I dont know how to tell you to get through it becauseI dont know myself how Im going to be able to go on without you. I dont want to think about it. But as your Dr., I would have to say something like, Nothing is forever. You must move on and take it one day at a time. Accept that it is over. Be glad for the time we had. Bullshit. The truth is, theres no answer. Its going to hurt for both of uslike Hell. But we have to live through itsomehow. Edward, if you were serious about that killing yourself stuff you said, then I need to take you somewhere now. He swallowed and his eyes turned serious. I dont want to kill myself, Bella., he whispered between us, Please forget that. It was a long time ago. I got over that. I dont need to go anywhere. I am where I need to be. The waitress came over with the food and Edward went back into date mode. Wow, this looks sooo good., he said as our plates were put down on the table, along with our cokes.

I just watched him as he winked at me and began twirling his spaghetti into his spoon with his fork. Thank you, Bella., he said, simply, in response to what I had said a moment ago, and I felt the real emotion in his voice when hed said it. His eyes burned into mine and I saw that he appreciated my answer to his question and I hoped he saw that my last words were an attempt to help him, not jail him in some mental institution. Youre welcome, Edward., I gave a little smile and began to cut up my spaghetti, giggling as Edward scolded me for doing so. The rest of our dinner was fun and wonderful. I really felt like I just met Edward tonight but I was already falling for him. He let me talk about my classes and friends. He didnt make up any medical school stories or friends, though, and I was glad. That wouldve made me sad, hearing him weave tales of things that never werebut couldve been. He wouldve been a great doctor. I started talking about my father, deciding to stop telling college stories. They might make him a little sad, since he couldnt finish college. Then, ten minutes into my Charlie stories, I thought maybe father stories would make him feel just as empty as the school stories. But Edward always looked interested as I spoke, and he laughed and smiled in all the right places. Before I knew it, we were stuffed and Edward was paying the check, along with a nice tip for the waitress. I was glad we had a nice walk ahead of us because I felt like a bloated whale as Edward pulled out my chair for me. That was so good., Edward walked beside me again, this time a little closer than earlier. He didnt try to hold my hand again and I wondered if I did something wrong. Yea, you were right., I smiled, That sauce was the best. Definitely., he agreed. Maybe I shouldnt have said what I said, breaking character after we ordered our food. No. I meant that and it was important. It had to be said. I shouldnt have talked about school so muchshit! I havent had so much fun on a date before., he said, in a less playful mood now. I was surprised and when I looked at him he was smiling at me, the wind ruffling his hair a bit, making it look messierand sexier than before. Me either., I admitted, The last date I was on, I nearly choked to death on my soda. Edward looked ahead of us and flashed that smile again, lightly chuckling to himself. I noticed, though, that the closer we got to my place, the more nervous and tense Edward appeared. Are you alright?, I asked.

Yea, his eyes darted to mine, then he looked at his shoes, and glumly added, Yea. I decided to have some guts and clear the air a little. I always get so nervous at the end of a first date., I confessed, Im always scared, wondering about the kiss at the doorway. Will it happen, will it notif it does happen, will it be greator not so great? Edward gave me a little grin now, not saying anything. I find its better to just not stress over it, I went on, And just let happenwhatever will happen. Thats easy for you to say, youre the girl., he pointed out. Woman., I corrected, And thats kind of a sexist remark, dont you think? No, Im not trying to be sexist., he smiled more, Im just sayingthe woman gets to stand there and waitthe man is the one who has to make the first move. Well, then, Im now changing the rules., I informed, You are not allowed to kiss me goodnight. I will be in charge of that. Im not allowed?, he laughed. No., I answered, grinning. Hmmm, he smirked, I dont know if I like it, being ordered around this way. In the ER, I usually give out all the orders. Youll live., I smiled, liking the way gentleman Edward doesnt like being ordered around. That says a lot. Id have to analyze that more later on. He seemed to relax a little and then I wondered what the hell I had done. Im no great kisser, I dont have all these romantic moveswhat the hell am I going do once we get to my door? Oh, God! Im going to make a huge fool of myself. We finally got to my door and he walked me up the stairs to my apartment door, not saying anything until we stood there, looking at each other timidly. I want to thank you for such a great time, Edward Cullen., I said, meaning that. It was all my pleasure, Bella Swan., he smiled back. I hope, I said, we can go out again sometime. I would love that., he smiled and it did things to my intestines. Me too., I said, not making any moves yet to kiss him. This is so strange. I feel like I cant do it. Like its too soon. Thats nuts. Well, he hesitated, looking down the stairs, Id better go. Goodnight., I heard myself say and inside my head was screaming, WHAT?!! He looked a little confused and then said, Goodnight, Bella. Slowly, he began to walk away a couple steps and I felt sick. He thinks I didnt like this datethat I dont like the gentleman he was tonight. NO! I had to stop

him now!! I summoned courageous, sexy Bella, making myself become that little flirt Edward was when I first met him. Hey!, I shouted and he froze, turning to me without walking back yet. Where do you think YOURE going?, I demanded. I, he began, You said Get your ass back here., I made myself say, Im not finished with you yet. He looked puzzled but he came back without a word. Without another word, I grabbed him by the sweater, slammed his back into the door and pulled the sweater to me, bending him so I could kiss those spectacular lips of his. I heard him making a couple of little soundssurprised little moans as I opened my lips and fully inhaled his kiss, making it stronger. He tasted like garlic and the best Italian sauce I had ever hadI devoured his taste. I broke the kiss and heard his heavy breathing hovering over me as his eyes stared down into my soul. Handing him my apartment key, I tried to give him a sexy smile and said, Would you like to come inside, Edward Cullen? He took the key from me and looked down at ithe really did look nervous, as if hed never done this before. Then I rememberedhe hasnt made love without games or toys or orders for so longthis is kind of new for him. Maybe hes afraid hell disappoint me or something. Bella, he breathed, looking at me with these sad eyes, What if youdont like methis way? I knew it. Hes so silly. Edward, I kissed him softly now, I want the real you now. And I will love italmost as much as I love you. Dont be afraid. Trust me. I do., he whispered, kissing me again, touching my face. He turned and slid the key into the lock, opening the door as I hugged his back, laying my face on the toned muscle beneath the fluffy sweater. He took my hand and led me into the dark apartment, kissing me again as he slammed the door closed, locking it, sealing us in together.

20 Wednesday, Day 10 EPOV Oh. My. God.

Those three words were the only ones I could hear in my own head all night long and with the uprising sun, they were still there. I felt like a god damned teenager last night at Bellas door and couldnt believe the fear inside of me when she called me back and wanted me to come inside with her. I know it was my ideaand I did want it. But I never thought I could actually do it. Deep down inside me, I thought back to my love making with Tanya, and she never seemed all that excited by meand in the end of our marriage, we didnt make love at all. Somewhere along the line, I convinced myself that learning all these games, tricks, and role plays made me a better lover than I was before. I thought that women liked all these games and thingsand maybe they did, for the momentbut I wanted to give Bella more. I wanted to truly make love to her, not leave her a bunch of empty scenes starring me that she would grimace remembering someday. And as soon as I suggested it, I was terrified that I wouldnt be able to pull it off and that I would disappoint her terribly, not to mention embarrass myself beyond belief. I was totally out of my league here, and I hated that. I couldnt fall back on my pretend personalities and confidant bedroom lines nowand I felt like a fucking virgin, so inept and inadequate. This would be only me making love to her nowand I never liked me. Why would she? She would surely like the fantasy me much better, wouldnt she? I kept thinking, am I going too fast? Too slow? Hard enough? Softer? I was a shivering wreck in the beginning but Bella amazed me. I suspect she liked it that I wasnt the cool, suave one anymore. Perhaps she liked my vulnerable side, being a lover of broken things needing repair. But she was so powerful, calm, tender, loving and guiding. And she didnt humiliate me, either, and I just loved her even more for that. She was teaching me now. We never rushed anythingeverything was slow and incredible. We didnt even get to the bed until almost an hour after we went inside. We sat on the floor and talked in the dark, just touching, still fully clothed. I never thought Id get chills from stroking a girls fingersbut I did. I learned Bellas whole bodynot just her best parts. And she had learned mineand we made complete, blissful, tormenting, passionate love to each other. I truly felt one with herit was as if our souls melted into one another and now, could not be separated again, even if our bodies went their own different ways. I sound like such a girlbut its the only way I know how to explain it. I never felt anything like that before. It was beyond any sexual experience Id ever known. It was almostspiritual. We never got to sleep. Bella had just fallen asleep a few minutes ago but my body is too charged to fall asleep right now. I feel like I could run ten miles if I wanted to. I laid on my stomach and just stared at her, laying my cheek on my folded arms. I can never hit on Bellas friendsI cant hurt her. I had hurt Tanya endlessly and I never got to try to apologize for any of it. I couldnt do that to Bella now. There is a line across Bellas apartment door, too. I had crossed it last night and entered a new worlda world only she could invite me into, a world I didnt deserve permanent access to.

To hurt her now, after all her hours of trying to help save my body and mindto leave that waythat would be another invisible red line Id be crossing and Id regret that forever, too. I cant keep making such stupid mistakes in my life over and over again. And I couldnt use Alice, either, not after the way she had helped Bella try to save me. I will do it Bellas way. I will honestly tell her the truth. It may be more painful, but at least shell know the truth. And she wont hate me. I hope. That would cripple me beyond repair, knowing that she was somewhere crying and scowling my name, loathing my memories with her. Later that afternoon, when she woke up, I had a nice little lunch ready for her and I asked her for a nice long day of therapy. She looked surprised and a little worried that maybe I hadnt liked our special night together. First off, I told her how life changing last night was for meand I thanked her for her magnificent confidence and guidance, not to mention patience during it all. To her credit, she acted like she didnt know what I was talking about and told me in return how amazing I was. I decided not to argue with her on this and just left it at that. She said she enjoyed it as much as I hadbut Im sure the pleasure was mostly all mine. I told her a lot more about the night of the fire and had bawled, embarrassed, for a long time. She sat beside me and held me and let me cry all I wanted. She even made me laugh because she had bought me a set of handkerchiefs, saying it was better than using tissues. I told her every detail of the night I sat next to Katie in the hospital, not allowed to touch her as she cried for her Mommy, and I had to beg her not to cry because the saltwater from her tears was hurting her burnt face. Then I gave her the visual of me screaming for the doctors to give her more painkillers and to give her something to make her sleep because my heart couldnt stand it anymore. And then, hours later, as the sun was coming up and I was sobbing beside my sleeping daughter, Ben and Angela arrived, just in time to hear from the police that their daughters body was found in the ruins of our apartment building and that she was gone. I told her the terror of talking to your little girl on a cell phone, trying to stay calm and tell her how to open a stuck window while you can see the floor beneath hers blazing and crackling in the flames. Do you know how fucked up it isseeing a fireman holding your daughter and saying shes alright and theyre coming upand your heart flies, thinking youve been granted a miracleand then the building explodesand before you have a chance to look againyou can hear the fireman and your daughter howling? Not to mention the sheer fucking agony of hearing your three year old daughter screaming in a pain theyve never known, and shouldnt have to know ever, while her body burnsand you, praying to God, screaming that the burning fireman holding her doesnt drop her in his own mind numbing tortureand that the firemen on the roof keep pulling them up as fast as they can so they can extinguish your baby girland the awful moments waiting after thatwaiting to hear if she survivedor if she was dead. The one moment of bittersweet joy I had that night was the firemans voice coming back on the radio of the firefighter beside me.

The little girls alive!, his voice had shouted in a celebratory tone, Shes still alive! I relived it allfor Bella. And she never once buckled under or wanted me to stop with my morbid stories. She was there for me. How could I have even thought of hurting Bella by hitting on her friend? I wanted to vomit now just thinking about it. I still to this day dont know how Tanya died from smoke inhalation while Katie woke up and answered the phone for me. The autopsy said she died before the fire touched her. And the cause of the fire they said was wiring problems. The nightlight tried to tell me after I tucked Katie inbut I didnt care enough to pay attention. I was stewing inside about Tanya and ignored that little sign of warning. I kept saying I shouldve gotten her outand Bella kept telling me over and over and over again that it wasnt my faultthat if it wasnt for me calling Katie on the phoneshe wouldve died, tooand that sometimes horrible things happen. And sometimes, some good things come out of pain. After a couple hours of talking, as Bella held my with her one arm while I laid my head on her shoulder, I finally asked. Do you really think my relationship with Katie isdamaged?, I asked, hating that her words still bothered me about that. She hugged me to her tighter and took a breath. I sometimes think how hard this must be on her., she said, And it hurts me inside to put myself in her place. First, she goes through that terrifying, painful night. Then she finds out her mother is gone. Then she has to deal with the fact that she is severely burned and disfigured. Im sure she saw pain in your eyes as you looked at herand then the looks of nurses and doctorsIm sure somewhere along the lineshe had to have seen her own reflection. And that fireman that died saving hermaybe she feels like thats all her fault. And then, awhile later, her father leaves, too. That has to send a message to her. I told you why I had to leave! I didnt want to! , I sat up and clenched my fists, staring at them instead of looking at Bella. I knew she was rightbut I didnt want to. But no one ever told Katie why you left, did they?, she asked. They told her I had to go away, to work, so she could have her operations and be alright again., I explained with a cold voice. Children dont always believe what theyre told, Edward., she pointed out, Sometimes they make up their own reasons. I honestly feelthat Katie thinks you left because she was so badly burned and wasnt pretty anymore. She sees how beautiful you and her mother areand maybe feels she isnt wanted because she lost her beauty. Thats a bunch of shit!, I snarled, hating this. But Bella remained composed and went on. Ormaybe she thinks its her fault Tanya died in the fire., Bella said and thats something that never occurred to me before.

Maybe she thinks if she couldve waken up her mother that night, when you told her to, that shed be alive todayand maybe she thinksyoure angry with her for not being able to do it., Bella said and didnt speak as my legs began to tremble. I felt ill insideJesus Christ, Bella could be right about thismaybe Katie does think these ridiculous thingsshe could be blaming herself for all thisjust like I do. I remembered her words on the phone that night when she picked up the phoneAre you mad, Daddy? I raced into the bathroom and got sick right in front of Bella, not even having time to close the door behind me. I hated putting Bella through thisbut she didnt run away from itor me. She stood behind me, stroking my hair and patting my back, saying she was sorrysniffling and crying to herself. She waited a few minutes as I waited for my legs to strengthen enough to raise me up and she got me a towel as I weakly stood and brushed my teeth, wondering what I would say now to impress her after I had made a complete fool of myself. But then a strange feeling came over me. I dont have to impress Bella or make her think Im some sex God or CasinovaI can be myself with her. I havent had that feeling for years, with any woman. When I came back to the sofa, Bella sat beside me again and put my head back on her shoulder as she ran her fingernails through my hair, saying in a very quiet and soothing voice, I think Katie is hurting as much as you are, Edward. And Im sure Ben and Angela are loving people but her suffering can only end when you go to herand explain everythingand let her know youve always loved her and always will. And that none of this is her fault. Only you can say that to her, face to face. And then, maybe the two of you can start to heal. I wanted to goright nowand bring Bella with me. Florida is only a couple hours away by plane. This would be my only chance to go. Victoria would never let me go visiting my daughter in Florida once my time with Bella was over. I do have four days left before I have to go back. But can I really just pop in and pop back out of Katies life after all this time? It would hurt her more and it would certainly kill me. If I go back to see Katie, Ill never leave. And Victoria will come after meand tell Katie what I amand then shell kill themand drag me back home with her. Ive seen what Victoria can doand Ill never let her get near my daughter. I guess I was physically showing signs of discomfort because Bella said, Shhhh, alrightdont think about that right now. You can go to her whenever you want. Once you are ready. No one can really stop you once youre ready to go back to her. Can we talk about your parents a little more now?, she asked me, wanting to go from one painful subject to another. The Pricks?, I asked with a little anger in my voice now, not moving from Bellas shoulder, Sure, why not? Its a fucked up kinda day, anyway. What exactly happenedwith them and Tanya?, she asked, curiously, I mean, you said they met her onceand didnt like herand told you to dump her or else you were cut out of their lives? That seems a little extreme to me. What did she do that was so horrible?

I dont know., I said, still as shocked now as I was then, My parents made this beautiful dinner, or had it made, and invited us over and they both hugged me like they never hugged me beforeand then I introduced them to Tanya and they looked very tensemy father looked sick! He covered his mouth, even and rushed out of the room. I thought they were being rude to her but my mother said I didnt understandand she tried to be nice to Tanya but her face was likerock! My father came to sit at the dining room table with us for a minute in the middle of our meal and then he jumped up again and left, saying he couldnt do this. She hardly said five words to him! Then Joseph asked me to come alone to see my father in his study. Thats when my father told me that he never wanted Tanya in his house again. He asked me how serious I was about Tanya and I told him I loved herI wanted to marry her after school was over. He looked sick again and said I couldnt marry her and to find some other girl, any other girl. I told him to go fuck himself and he got mad and threatened if I didnt break up with her, hed disown meand I would be on my own from then on. And I could never come back there again. I couldnt believe itI still cant. But he meant it, obviously. I got Tanya and I leftand I told my mother what Carlisle had said. She said she had to agree, and again, that I didnt understand. I left there and swore Id never come back, for anything. Id rather starve first. I waited all my life for themwaiting to get some approval or any kind of attention. Finally, it seemed like they wanted to be part of my life that nightand then they pulled that shit on me. It was just the last straw. That is weird., Bella said, thinking over all Id just told her, Did your father know her before? It seems likeas soon as he saw herhe didnt like her. No, my father didnt know her before., I frowned, wondering why Bella would think that, Theyd never met before. Youre sure?, Bella asked. Yes, Im sure., I said, mostly sure of that. You dont understand., Bella said to herself, repeating my mothers words, Theres more to it than they just didnt like hertheres something else I was thinking this over as well now, and before I got very far, Bella said, And I notice, you were a fighter back then. You told your father to go fuck himself. I wish I could get that fight back into you now. Im different now, Bella., I admitted, I dont have any fight left in me. A lot of shit has happened to me since then. I know, baby, I know, she said softly, kissing my head, It will take time to build that up in yourself again...but you can do it. Sure in between my pizza deliveries and appointments with Ravennot to mention my special starring roles in the series of men in pain videos. Oh, Victoria, Ill be back laterIm going to my Dr. appointment to learn to fight back against you. I wont be long.

I let out a breath and didnt want to argue with Bella right now. I hated to admit it, but I was liking therapy today. And I loved Bellas fingernails in my hair, scratching my scalp lightly. I know., I said, hoping shed leave it at that. And what happened when you saidyou went back?, Bella asked. The money I got from the loan sharks restored Katies internal organs enough so she didnt have to be in this oxygen chamber tent. She hated it in thereand then she could breathe normal air again. And I could touch her again. That was one of the best days of my life. I kissed every inch of her face and she kissed me, too. I nearly bawled again but I held it in, clearing my throat and continuing. I sniffed, letting a single tear go, Bella couldnt see it from her angle next to me. Once it was time to pay those loan sharks back, I didnt know what to do. Ben and Angela were back in Florida, but I couldnt ask their help again, not after I killed their daughter and burned their granddaughter. Edward, Bella growled, not liking it that I kept blaming myself. Besides that,, I said, Bens factory was having problems. He was doing all he could to save it. They make plastic hangers, I guess its not a booming business. The sick thing is, if he made sex toys, hed be a billionaire. God, this world sucks. Go on with your story, Mr. Positive., Bella ruffled my hair. I almost robbed a bank., I confessed, I was going to use a toy gun of Katies and go up to a teller with a note. I wrote it out and everything. But as I was walking up to the bank, I couldnt do it. I chickened out. Besides, Id probably get caught and would either be shot or rot in jail. And I didnt want that. Katie would find out, itd be in the paperand it wouldnt make those guys go away that wanted their money. One night,, I said, I saw those guys in the hospitallooking for my daughters room. I sobbed again and pushed it back. I dont know if they wanted to kidnap her to get me to pay them, or if they wanted to hurt herbut I didnt care. Either way, I had to get her out of there. I wrapped her up in a couple blankets and snuck her out of there. God knows how I managed to do that without anyone stopping me. But this is how fucked up the world is. No one stopped me. I couldve been anyone carrying her out of there and not one person stopped me. That still pisses me off to this day! The closest place to go was my parents house., I said blankly, If those guys were following meI had to hurry and get her somewhere safefast. So I swallowed all my stupid pride and went there. I knocked on the door and my mother answered it. I was holding Katie in my arms, thank GOD she was asleep, because my mother took one look at me and herand nearly screamedand slammed the door. She fucking slammed the door in my facein Katies face! Because Katie wasnt beautifulor perfect! Youd think being a doctors wife shed be tougher, more able to handle seeing burns or sickness and disease

I stopped for a minute, trying to water down my hatred for my mother before getting on my father next. I woke Katie up when I started kicking their door, pounding on it, and yelling. I lost control of myself., I said, feeling tears in my eyes again, I scared Katie and she was crying while I shouted my rage and cried myself, all the while screaming at them, in a rage. I told them I didnt want to come inbut if they could justtake her and care for her in his hospitalI would owe them my lifeI would do anything. My father turned on the intercom, not even man enough to show his face to me and said Go away, Edward. We cant help you. Take Kaitlyn far away from herenow. And thats all he said to me. I was switched off, like I was one of the fucking help! Then I called Ben and Angela. They got on the first plane and came for her. Wait., Bella tensed a moment, They knew her name? Yes., I said. Edward, they knew her name., Bella said again. So? If you dont care about a child born to your forgotten son, then why would you know her name?, Bella asked, EdwardI think they didcare. I dont know why they acted the way they didbut I think were missing some of the story here. What story?, I asked, Theyre pricks, pure and simple. I dont think so, Edward., Bella stood up, looking excited about something, looking at me, I think we need to get the whole story. If theyre anything like you, they wont reveal everything all at oncebut we should talk to them. Im nothing like them., I didnt like hearing that out of Bellas mouth. Edward, she looked at me deeper, Remember your trick of pushing people away? Remember it? I was planning on doing it to you just yesterday. Yea, so?, I squinted. I think your parents are doing the same to youbut why is what we have to find out., she sounded like an episode of Scooby Doo. Howre you gonna do that?, I almost scoffed. Call them., she said simply, taking out her notebook, writing something. No, Bella., I said through gritted teeth, You will not call them. What are you so afraid of, Edward?, she stopped and put her notebook down, sitting on the floor at my feet, taking my hands into hers, her gaze full of compassion and love. They wont talk to you, even if you do call them., I further warned. She would do it, I know it. Bella would be the type to call them anyway. I know it hurtstheir rejection of you and Tanyaand even Katie., she said cautiously, staring up at me, rubbing her thumbs in slow circles over my hands,

But there must be more to it. Just like Katie is probably thinking the wrong things about your absence, youre probably thinking the wrong things about why your parents arent there for you. If you talked to them, maybe youd see its not your fault after all. Like I said, children always think its their fault. Youre doing just that. You have to find out or youll never get over it. I never wanted Katie to be alone like I wasbeing cared for by other people. I tried so hard to give her the family I never had. And I screwed upand now she doesnt have me or Tanya., I heard my voice crack. Its time to stop weeping over the past, Edward., she said, her voice stronger now, Tears dont change things, Edward. Actions do. These next four days shouldnt be wasted. Youll never get this little window of time again. Use it. Dont let it slip by. Lets take action, Edward. Lets try. What if things go wrong?, I asked, hating sounding so afraid and weak. What if things go right?, she countered with, shutting me up, So many things have gone wrongI have to believe that you have some right coming to you. But its not going to fall into your lap, Edward. You have to get off your ass and fight for it. Fight for Katie, if nothing else. Let her be your armor. Stop being so afraid. Im with you. Youre not alone anymore. I felt so scared but Bellas words made me feel bravertougher. Finally, after a long pause, I almost croaked out the words. What do we do first?, I wondered aloud. Tomorrowwe take a very big step., Bella informed me with confidence, Your parents are coming over. What?, I almost shouted, my eyes gaping at her. I called themyesterday after you left., she confessed, I wanted to call someone who cares about youand I had to call them. They are where your life began, they have to care somehow about you. You spoke to them?, I stood up, looking further down at her as she sat on the floor, not moving her position. I spoke to Joseph., she said calmly, I said that I thought they should come see you and talk things over. He was very nice. He agreed with me. He said hed talk to them and let me know if they would see you. A half hour later, he called back and said theyd be here tomorrow. I was going to wait until they got here to say anything, have you blindfolded and handcuffed to a chair when they came inbut I thought, thats not fair to you. You should be prepared. I didnt want to betray your trust. Even though I was going to betray hers when I thought of hitting on Alice. I suck. I dont deserve this girl. Did you tellJoseph what I am?, I asked, praying to God she didnt. She frowned up at me, Absolutely not. What kind of person do you think I am? I know hes like a father to you. I even asked him and Katherine to come along, but he said thats probably not a good idea. Yea, my parents wouldnt be seen going anywhere with the help!, I turned my back to her, sounding bitter again, but I couldnt help it.

I just might need you to handcuff me to a chair when they get here., I felt so nervous and out of sorts suddenly, and they werent even coming today. Ill stand in front of the door if you try to bolt., she smiled, Hows that? Will you stay with me, Bella?, I asked, feeling like a five year old, I dont want to be alone with them. If you want me to, yes., she agreed. Why would they come here now?, I wondered out loud, They never gave a shit before. They didnt even call you back themselves. Well, now, thats a good question to ask them when they come in., Bella sounded like my kindergarten teacher. Im not going to be nice to them, Bella., I informed. Thats fine., she shrugged, Say anything you wantwhatever youre feeling is okay. You dont have to pretend. But get it all out in the open. Demand to know why they treated you that way. Damn right., I heard my voice say and lots of strength oozed out of my words. Bella stood and wrapped her arms around me, laying her cheek to my heart and she said, Im so proud of you, Edward. Youre so much stronger than you know. You make me strong, Bella., I closed my eyes, holding her closer. No, Edward., she looked up at me, You cant get your strength from me. If we get separated, youll think you have no strength anymore. Your strength is inside YOUdont forget that. Youll always have itwith or without me. Okay? I had to smile at her and fall in love with her all over again. Okay, Dr. Bella., I agreed. Thank you, Edward., she held me close again, For seeing them. I know how hard it is for you. I let out a long breath and searched for something to say in response. I didnt want to see them or even hear them, but I would do it for her, if she thought it would help me somehow. Honestly, I just thought Bella would get to witness their further hatred and rejection of me firsthand. I was steeling myself inside for their disgust and indifferencebut thenwhy would they agree to come here? I didnt like being so unsure and I felt nauseous knowing they would be sitting in here tomorrow, trying to act polite and explain themselves. I knew I couldnt be rescued from Victorias cage, even if they did show up and apologized all over the placeand I wasnt hoping for any salvationbut Bella was right about one thing. They owed me an explanation. And I would never get a chance to talk to them again. I should use these next four days to get some answers, at least. But deep down, I was still afraid. I didnt know why but I was. I needed Bella there. How would I even be able to look at themlet alone speak to them? I could see Bella being the mediator between us and that calmed me down a lot.

Come on, lets go take a nice walk outside., Bella took me by the hand and smiled, knowing how the air and sun healed me. Thanks, Bella., I said as we reached her apartment door, Thanks for telling me before they got here. If you had handcuffed me and blindfolded me and then let them init probably wouldve killed me. I know., she winced, I hate that even considered doing it that wayI thought youd be too stubborn to agree to itbut then I thoughtif I did that to youI really would be Victoriaand Raven. Doing that to you, I think would be worse than anything they ever tried with you. Youre right., I agreed, Sothank you for respecting me. After last night, I HAVE to respect you., she smiled that fiery little smile as she yanked me out of the apartment, and slammed the door closed after me.

21 BPOV Thursday, Day 11 Edward had been a bundle of nerves all night last night and he was no better off today. All he had been able to eat since I told him about his parents coming was Saltine crackers. He said he always feels nervous around them, even as a child, because it was a rarity that they ever came home. I knew this was like another test for Edward. Every time they would come home, he would try to be what they wanted this timehoping theyd accept him and love himand they always left too soon. I could see he was doing that againhoping theyd finally want him. It was nice to see some hope in Edwards eyesat last. He had nightmares and he let me hold him, just like that first night Id given him the nightshirt. We didnt make love or play any games that night. He really didnt look up to it with the mindset he was in. And he was apologizing all over the place but I told him to shut upI told him I was tired and it was alright. Taking a night off doesnt make us any less lovers and I told him so. He seemed relieved by that and tried to get some sleep as he laid his face on my chest and I played with his hair, gently curling my other arm around him. I hated hearing his dreamshe didnt tell me a lot about them but I figured some of them out. No, please, he pleaded, panting for air, Why? DAD!! That was the first one. I figured that was the night his parents met Tanya. I talked him back to sleep and finally he went under againand then this next nightmare came: Why are you doing this?!!, he cried, What did I EVER do to you?!! Tanya is dead, PLEASE!! DAD!! Shes just a baby, for CHRISTS SAKE!! Killers are fucking following us, PLEASE MOMMMM!!!!

I had to shake him a few times to snap him out of that one. When he came to, his hands flung out and almost hit me and he was sweatingshakingthen crying and apologizing to me again. I hated seeing him cry and I clung to him for dear life, wondering if having his parents over was a good idea at all now. Look what it was doing to him. But then the psychiatrist in me said NO, Bella. Be tough. Edward has to face his pain and his demons. Hes run from them for far too long. He must see this through. Just comfort him and be there for him. Thats all you can do. All in all, I think Edward got aboutten minutes of sleep that night. And now he was staring at the TV, watching cartoons and chomping on Saltines as it neared 1pm, the time they would be arriving. He didnt say anything to me directly about it, but he went out at dawn and came back with five new outfits, and kept trying them all on, and changing themand trying them on again. He wants to make a good impression on themand that gave me a little hope. He almost wore a tie and although he looked very GQ in it, I thought that was a little too much, so he changed again. Finally, he stayed with a nice pair of gray slacks and a white button down shirt, long sleeved, the first two buttons opened. It looked dressy but at the same time, casual enough. He shaved very close and smelled awesome when he came out of the bathroom, complaining about his fucked up hair. I told him his fucked up hair is beautiful and not to mess with it. He wanted to gel it straight back so it looked neater. I wouldnt allow that and hid his hair products. Then I had to assure him six times that I could not see any of his lash marks through the white cotton of his shirt and he finally believed me and relaxedsort of. I kept gently assuring him that he didnt have to turn himself into something or someone else to impress them. They owed him the apologies, not the other way around. But I could understand his fears. Finally, a knock gently tapped on the door and Edward leapt up and flung himself into the far corner of the living room, his arms crossed and his eyes down, looking away from the apartment door they were on the other side of. He was visibly trembling and trying to hide it. Edward, I said, feeling my insides twist at his sudden stance of fear and defensebut he didnt look at me or even answer. He looked paralyzed with hurt. You can do this, Edward., I whispered, as I backed myself towards the door, Im here with you He didnt answer but I unlocked my door and opened it a crack, very nervous myselfbut I had to shut that off now. I was needed here. I saw a beautiful mans face above me and he gave a little smile. His white face was a lot like Edwardsbut his nose was very differentelegantly chiseled to a sharp little point, soft, curved looking cheekbones and honey blonde hair, perfectly combed back. And a pair of butterscotch golden-brown eyes gleamed at me. He wore a very nice looking dark gray suit and a tie and I felt scared now that I told Edward no tie.

Miss Swan?, he asked and I felt myself like him right away. If I were a new patient of his, I would trust him. Thats only my first impression of the man at face value, though. I knew enough from Charlie to realize appearances lie sometimes. Yes., I smiled. I am Carlisle Cullen., he said and I could hear Edward breathing heavier in the corner behind me, And this is my wife, Esme Cullen. At this, she came out from behind him and this lovely, classy lady stepped forward. Her hair was swept up in an elegant twist and it was a rich, reddishbrown color that was not exactly like Edwards shade, but in the same neighborhood as that. She, too, got all dressed up and had pearls around her neck and wore a pretty lavender dress, matching pumps too. Her makeup was flawless and her face looked so youngplastic surgery probably. But I saw what Edward meant. She looked perfect...and too perfect. A little child could never touch someone this put togethershe looked veryunhuggable. Hello, Miss Swan., her voice was like an angelsdripping with care, Thank you so much for calling. I knew Edward could hear them inside and I didnt want to prolong his misery, but before I let them in I wanted to ask some things first. No problem., I grinned weakly, glancing back at Edward. His eyes were still looking out the window down at the street outside, although I knew he was listening to every word and screaming on the inside. Before you come in., I said in a hushed voice, Edward is inside. I hope you know this is very hard for him. Pleasedont try to hug him just yet, at firstandplease let him say what he has to say. And give him timeto say it. I saw Esme nod at me, her eyes intent on mine and listening carefully. Carlisle gave a quick nod and looked away, behind him. Avoidance. Like father, like son. Come in, please., I opened the door all the way and let them slowly step inside. They saw Edward there in the corner and he still made no effort to turn towards them or even look into the room we were standing in. Carlisle and Esme looked at him with no wordsand Esme looked very sad. Carlisle licked his lips, swallowed and just stood there, in the kitchen area, not daring to move too close to their son. I would have to break the ice a little here. Im sorry its not very big., I tried to sound light, Im in college nearby and I dont need much room. No, its lovely here, Miss Swan., Esme complimented. Oh, please, call me Bella., I said, Would you like anything? Coffeeor tea? No thank you, Bella., Carlisle said kindly. Well, why dont we all sit down and I can explain a little bit about who I am?, I offered.

They moved towards the sofa and sat down side by side. I sat in my chair and looked over at Edward. The only place left to sit was next to his mother on the sofabut he was still in the corner, looking like a punished little boy. I cleared my throat and Edwards eyes squinted at me, a glint of anger there that almost stunned me for a secondand then he looked out the window again. Edward may sit down later., I said to them, trying to grin but they seemed to understand. I had previously gotten rid of all Edwards tapes and my notebooks, not wanting them in view or even in danger of being heard by his parents. My name is Bella, as you know, I began, And I major in psychiatry at New York University. I am working on my thesis and Edward, being a friend of mine, volunteered to be my subject. So we have been talking a lot about his pastand I thought it would be good for Edward and yourselvesto talk and perhaps resolve some things. God, how much truth did I leave out of that paragraph? It doesnt matter. If Edward wants to tell them about his life, he will tell them, not me. Im certainly not going to tell them their son is a male prostitute and a sex slave to boot. Well, not yet anyway. Maybe Edward was afraid Id tell them. He should know me better than that by now. Well, that makes sense., Carlisle glanced at his sons back and then to me, I wasnt sure who you were when Joseph informed me of your call. Maybe you shouldve picked up the phone yourself then and called back., Edwards voice seethed as he spoke from gritted teeth but his body didnt move and his eyes were still outside. Oh, good. Communication. Carlisle looked at Esme and then down at his folded hands, frowning a little. Edward, I said his name gently, Would you like to join us, please, and sit down? A long pause went by and then he sneered, No. I looked at them and decided that if I talked enough, eventually, Edward would get in this conversation. And his parents werent leaving here until he got it together and said what he had to sayand got his answers in return. Edward has been through a lot., I began, And he has a lot of angerwhen it comes to you. Its hurting him, still. Maybeif you said something firstit would help him. I put the ball in their court now and watched to see if they truly cared. Esme spoke first. We havent been, she looked down, ..very good parents to Edward. I know thatIve always known that. Were almost strangers and that hurts me every single day. You probably know him better than we do.

I could see Edwards face and his eyes were so cruel now, his jaw clenchedhis fists balled under his arms that crossed even tighter now. It wouldnt be long before he spoke up. I think itll take his fathers voice to get him talking. So I asked him the next question. Dr. Cullen, I said, What happened between you? He looked at his sons back again and sighed. Then he said, BellaI know you are Edwards friendand are trying to help him. But I cant speak about that. Perhaps, if we could have some time alone with Edwardwe could Fuck YOU!!, Edward spun towards them suddenly, and it made me jump in surprise, as it did them. His face was full of rage and his eyes hard as stone, his fists clenched at his sides as he mostly shouted at his father, Anything you need to say to me, you can say in front of Bella!! Shes been there for me more than you have, and shes known me for ten whole days!! I dont WANT to be in a room alone with EITHER of you! My skin is crawling now that youre HERE! So you can answer her questionsor get out now! This wasnt MY idea. Edward is getting very good at expressing his anger. I wish I could see him do that to Victoria. Edwardplease, I stood up and took his hands in mine, whispering, Please, heresit in my chair, alright? Ill sit on the sofa. I sat him in my chair and he looked relieved not to be very close to them as I sat next to his mother. Looking at the floor again, Edward clenched his jaw and fists, looking like an angry statue. We will answer your questions., Esme said, to me and shot her husband a stern look, Answer her, Carlisle. It will be very difficultfor either of you to hearor believe, Im afraid., Carlisle began, But I will be as honest as I can. Edwardtold us that he met a wonderful girl in college., Carlisle said, And he wanted us to meet her. We were glad. Edward never much dated in high school and always kind of kept to himself. We didwant to meet her and we invited them to dinner one weekend. Carlisle hesitated and Edwards eyes kept their wicked stare on my carpet, looking as still as a crocodile waiting to snap at any second. Just say it, Carlisle., Esme looked at her husband, Theres no easy way to do it. You promised. Esme, please., Carlisle looked at her, I am trying. Edward, Carlisle looked at his frozen son, hoping to reach him vocally, We had every intention of welcoming Tanya into our family. We truly did. But something happened. Something I never thought would happen. He paused again and suddenly looked nervous and afraid, too. I braced myself for whatever he was going to say. Edward didnt movehe looked chiseled out of porcelain.

When Tanya came into the house, Carlisle took another breath, When I(he swallowed hard)inhaled her scentI nearly lost my sanity. Huh? This has something to do with Tanyas perfume? Even Edwards eyes raised up to his father and they looked as confused and lost as mine. Im lost., I said it, knowing Edward wouldnt. Imnot well., Carlisle said, I have had mental problems for years and yearsand voices in my mindwere telling me to hurt Tanya that night. Carlisle!, Esme gritted her teeth and her regal composure began to crack. Stop lying to him, Carlisle!, Esme demanded, Tell him the truthor I will. Look at all the ruined lives our silence has brought! Carlisle looked up and made eye contact for the first time with his estranged son and decided to come clean, at last. Alright., Carlisle said right to Edward, The truthfinally. Edwardyour mother and Iwe are vampires. They didnt say anything for a few moments and I frowned at them, not liking their jokes while their son wanted real answers. I looked at Edward and he just stared his father down, an unholy glare that raged between them. You shouldve stuck with your mental problem story, it was more believable., Edward said without emotion. I told you he wouldnt believe us., Carlisle sighed at his wife. Thats why you have to explain it, CARLISLE., she was getting angry now and gave her husband a hard shove. When I was born, my mother died in childbirth. My father was on a trip when that happened and for most of my childhood, I was left with nannies and butlers, and he was always gone, on business, I was always told. I never knew much about the manexcept that he was rich and hardworkingand never there. Hey, it sounds just like my childhood., Edward faked a childlike voice, filled with surprise, but his face was still scary and glaring at his father. I know that, Edward., he admitted, I never wanted to be that kind of father and I always told myself that when I had children, I would be there and raise them and play with themand know everything about them. Edward scoffed and gave a wicked laugh that gave me chills. Remind me never to get Edward pissed off. Esme looked even sadder than before as she stared at her son but she nudged Carlisle to keep talking. When I met your mother, I was done with college and Medical school. I was already a doctor. We fell in love and got married within a year after meetingand we wanted to have a big family. We got right to work and had you, Edward. And we were so happy with you.

You were the most beautiful baby I had ever seen., Esme cut in, needing to say this, And so happyyou smiled two days after you were borneven though they say babies cant do thatyou didyou smiled at methat cute, almost crooked smileand since that moment, I knew Id die for you. I know what you mean, I heard myself think to her, he did it to me, too. Mother, spare me please., Edwards voice was so ice cold and his expression matched his voice. Esme looked down and stopped talking but Carlisle spoke up now. Edward, dont speak to your mother that way., Carlisle frowned a little, defending his wife. Why not?, he snapped at his father, leaning forward a little and tilting his head to the side, Because shes been so good to me? Because shes my(he gave a little laugh, looking her up and down)Mommy? The last thing she did for me was to PUSH, so dont tell me how to talk to HER. Shes not my mother! Katherine is my REAL mother. She played games with me, SHE cooked for me and fed me, and SHEloved me. If I wouldve ever been allowed to speak with HER after I was disowned, I would speak with love and respect to HER. But you even took her away from me. Just explain, Carlisle., Esme clenched her fists a little now, reminding me of Edward as Carlisle put aside his frustration and spoke again, getting back to his story. After you were born, my father sent me a letter and invited all of us to his estate so he could meet his grandson. I thought it was a little odd, but we planned to go. At the last minute, you came down with a little cold and we nearly cancelled the whole trip. But then, your mother thought it was important that we try to make peace with him, try to let him come into our lives. Esmes parents died when she was younger so you didnt have much family. She wanted you to have a grandpaand she wanted me to have my father, even if it was a little late. Katherine and Joseph stayed with you, Edward, Carlisle said, And your mother and I went to visit my father. Esme held Carlisles hand, giving him support as I looked over at Edward. He didnt look very impressed by this story yetand neither was I, really. But I waited. When we got there, Carlisle said, It was explained to me by my father, that the Cullen family has a very long historyof vampirism. To keep our bloodline going, it is their tradition that when they have a child they raise it as a human and when that child grows and has a mortal child of their ownit is time for them to take their place in the vampire world. I was now a parent of a sonand my father told meit was time to take my place. Andhe attacked me. Hebit meseveral times. Edward sighed, rolling his eyes and muttered to me, Bella, you must have a speed dial to the nearest psych ward, dont you, being a future psychiatrist? You wanted answers, Edward., Carlisle frowned and became very stern now, These are the answers. Throw us out if you like afterwards, but listen until Im done.

Edward crossed his arms and regarded his father without a shred of belief, but he listened. My father wouldve spared your mother the burden of being a vampire. He intended to leave her human and to send her back to raise you to manhood. But, later, when he told her about what hed done to me, your mother fought back and demanded to know where I was. I was on the other side of the mansion, starting my transformation. It takes about three days to become a full vampire. It was incredibly painful and I was bound down and screamingmy father tried to lock Esme up in her room for the three days until my change was over. But he underestimated her resolve. She broke out in the middle of the night and found me. Unfortunately, for herI had just become a newborn vampireand my father was nowhere to be found. Maybe he hoped I would feed on her and he wouldnt have to worry about her fighting back anymore. Maybe he thought if I killed her myself, I would have nothing else to live for and wouldnt fight taking my place in his world. I dont know. But when Esme freed me, she had no idea what a mindless, thirsty creature I was at the time. I bit herI drank herand I nearly killed her. Well, actually, I didkill her. This is worse than that Lestat movie., Edward looked at me, commenting. Carlisles eyes flashed angrily at his sons now, not getting any sympathy from Edward as he spoke of his wifes near death experience. I kept thinking they were going to say, Youve been punked! at any moment now and Ashton Kutcher would come flying in, laughing and pointing at us all. My father showed up at that moment and began congratulating me for joining the vampire race., Carlisle looked disgusted, remembering, And I begged him to save Esme. I realized, too late, what I had done. And I swore to him that I would do what he asked, taking my place in his sick little world, if hed save her. He told me she would livebut as a vampire. It was too late to save her mortal life. Shed lost too much blood. So we sat and watched your mother change for the next three days. Our lives were over., Carlisle said, sounding very sad now, We werent worried about ourselveswe were thinking about you, Edward. My father told us we couldnt go near you again, not for a few years, until we learned how to control our thirst. It killed usbut we didnt want to endanger you. We lived in my fathers house, learning his ways. Learning our new roles in this life he forced upon us. You see, the Cullens have always been judges for our kind throughout the centuries. It is our duty, delivering justice tovampires that break our lawsdisobey our rules. My father taught me everything he knewand intended for me to take his place one day. I didnt want that., Carlisle went on, I wanted to keep being a doctor. I worked in secret to try and overcome my thirstto resist human blood. Esme and I hated killingI was born to be a healer, not a murderer. We began to survive by drinking the blood of animals. We always called you and made sure you were being cared forwe told only Joseph and Katherine what had happened to us. We trusted them only. They vowed to love you as we wouldand they did, as you pointed out a minute ago. All the time, we missed you so muchwe tried to come hometo see if our thirst was under control. You had gotten so bigyou were walking all by yourself and talkingwe missed all that and it killed us, especially your mother. That first time back home, you were a toddler, and you didnt even know us, really. But your

mother tried to give you a hugshe wasnt ready to be near you yet. She pushed you away a little too hard and you criedyou were scared, not hurt. And that was probably your first memory of your mother. We had to get out of there, fast. We were both very tempted by not only your blood, but of Josephs and Katherines blood, too. We needed more timewe had to leave you again for awhile longer. Many times, we tried to come back and see if we could stand being close to you., he said, careful not to make it sound like an insult, Close to any humans, I mean. We sent you gifts on your birthday and once we sat outside the window, watching you on your 5th birthdaybut we still werent ready to come in and be near all the other children and youand againwe were destroyed that we couldnt be part of your life, Edward. If nothing else, I hope someday you can believe that. We werent having fun, going on trips all over the world without you. We suffered every day without you. We loved youwe still do. Esme never cried but looked like she wanted to. Edward didnt move an inch. We did come around more after you turned eight., Esme offered, At that point, we could be in the room with you and we were in control. Butyou were so affectionateeven though you didnt really know usyou wanted to. You were always after me, wanting hugs and kisseswanting me to play with youand I know I pushed you away a lotalmost always. And your sad little face would break my heart. (she was making sobbing sounds but no tears came). I wanted you, EdwardI did! But I always wanted toI loved you too muchand that made me love the scent of you and your blood too much as well. It was so hard for meI tried to resist itbut its so strong. Edwards face wasnt so cruel nowit softened a littlebut he still avoided eye contact with herI thought maybe he was feeling something, hearing his mothers emotional words, but he didnt show it clearly. I tried to spend some quality time with you, then, too., Carlisle looked down, ashamed, But you only seemed to want your mother. I know you were angry with me, thinking I was stealing your mother away from you. And I didnt blame you. I tried to talk to you a couple of timesbut there was no way to explain this to you then. You were a little boy. We thought we could keep it all a secret from you. At first, we didnt want to scare you away from us. We wanted to try to build a relationship with you. Then, laterwe wereafraid you would reject us or be disgusted by us. As if I ever had a chance to reject YOU., Edward said with a dark voice, You were both so busy rejecting me. Maybe, just maybe, at that point in my lifeI wouldve accepted youeven asvampiresas long as it meant you WANTED me. But you never seemed to want me. Ever. God, how I waited and wished to see some shred of WANT in your eyes when you came home! But it was never there. And its not there even now. Edward leapt up from the chair and glanced at me, walking into the kitchen and taking a bottle of water out of the fridge, needing a little break from this and them. I couldnt tell if he was upset or crying, he just seemed very angry to me and that was perfectly normal. He was doing well now, voicing his pain. I still dont believe this whole vampire nonsense. This has to be some kind of joke or something. Did Edward believe them? Should I call some men in white coats? My psychiatry training told mehumor them. Let them tell their story, no matter how insaneand see where it goes.

Esme looked at me and suddenly I felt a little scared. I peeked at her from behind my hair and shuddered a bit. Were alright now., Esme assured me, We have our thirst under control. We wouldnt hurt you, either of you. At this, Edward rushed into the living room and yanked me off the sofa away from his mother, pushing me behind him as he frowned down at them. Esme looked very hurt at this action of her sons. Im sorry, Bella, Edward didnt turn to look at me as he watched them, I didnt mean to leave you alone with the monsters, here. You dont have to insult us, Edward., Carlisle kept his seat and temper, We know youre angry with us, but Angry doesnt even cover it, DRACULA!, Edward shouted, Id have to forgive a thousand things youve done to GET to be just ANGRY! Do you at least believe us, Edward?, Carlisle asked, curiously. That youre vampires?, he squinted, No. I also dont believe in Santa, the tooth fairy, or Rudolph the red nosed reindeer! I think you two are on something very heavy and I want you out of here before I call a cop. When youre ready to talk seriously, write me a letter. Edward, I said, You should at least hear what they have to say. Theyre mocking me, Bella!, he shouted in my direction, turning to me, Worse, theyre mocking Tanya and Katie! Ill do it, Carlisle., Esme pushed him down with her dainty fingers and stood up, going over to the window, pulling up the blinds, letting the sun glare inside. Both Edward and I stopped in mid sentence and stared at her, mouths open. She was glowingnosparklingand it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, besides Edward. Look at my face, Edward., Esme said, Look at your fathers faceclosely. We dont have any wrinklesno gray hairnot one single thing that makes us look a day older than we were in our twenties. This is what happens to our skin when the sun touches us She looked around outside the window and with one finger gracefully moved it up, opening it. No ones looking., Esme smirked to her husband and went out onto the fire escapethen jumped off it. MOM!!, Edwards eyes bugged out and he lunged towards the window, stumbling out onto the fire escape as I grabbed him, afraid hed go after her off the edge. Oh my GOD!, I screamed, thinking shed killed herselfand I tried to look and see if her body was laying down on the streetbut it wasnt. She was standing down there, shielding her eyes, smiling up at us, not a scratch on her. I didnt even break my heels., she said proudly, then bent her knees and sprang up, standing like a graceful bird on the iron ledge of the fire escape balcony, smiling down at her sons flabbergasted face.

You called me Mom., she said, looking as if she had received the greatest gift in the world. I yanked Edward back in the window, stunned, but able to say one thing. I believe them, Edward, I breathed. So do I, Bella., he whispered back, almost landing on his ass on the floor as his mother entered the room again, smiling to herself. Stay back!, he pointed at Esme, standing in front of me, protecting me, Sit over there! Dont come close! Esme put her hands up, allowing us our fear and didnt take any offense. Alright, alright, she agreed, Im sitting over here. We wont hurt you. We came to explain thingstheres a lot more to say. Get a crucifix., Edward shoved me towards the bathroom behind him. Where the hell am I going to get a crucifix out of the bathroom?!, I squeaked, What do you want me to do, tie our toothbrushes in a cross with some dental floss?! I dont knowget it from anywhere!, he said, clearly still very shaken by seeing his mother plunge to her deaththen coming back up again. I dont have any crucifixes!!, I held his arm for a moment, trying to make myself brave again as his parents smiled at us, Im trying to discover God in my own way. Jesus!, he growled. Yea, him, too., I added as Edward turned to me with a lethal look in his eyes. Edward looked at his parents and took a breath, saying, Wait. He went to the kitchen and dug around in my drawers there. In a minute, he came back with two wooden spoons rubber banded together in a cross, holding it in front of him as his parents broke out in a laugh. He always was cute., Esme said, remembering him as a boy. And very creative, too., Carlisle grinned. I dont think theyre afraid of you, Edward., I informed. We wont hurt you., Esme said again, Really. Please, Edwarddont be afraid of us. We have waited a long time to have a chance to tell you everything. Lets sit down, Edwardand hear what they have to sayokay?, I asked him, feeling his hand curl around mine. Fine., he didnt take his eyes off them, as if waiting for them to attack at any moment. He moved to the chair, pulling me behind him and before I knew it, we were both sitting in the big chair, squished together, not wanting to be apart nowand neither of us wanting to sit on the sofa next to Esme.

Again, his parents giggled at us as Edward placed his spoon crucifix on the coffee table close by, in case he needed it again. I had to get back into my Dr. Bella mode and help Edward get the information he had needed for so long. I just never dreamed in a million years this would all be because Edwards parents werevampires! God, my grade is going to be in the toilet now. James would never buy it. Alright., I said as Edward stared at his parents with huge eyeballs, Solets say we believe youthat you arevampires. That might explain your absence while Edward was growing upbut then when he was in collegewhen he was nineteen, and wanted to introduce you to Tanyawhat happened then? You said you got your thirst under controlwere you a doctor then? Carlisle smiled at me and said, Yes, I was surprised to find that I could be a doctor. At first, I was a doctor of science and worked in labs by myselfworking in my spare time on a serum I could drink that would make iteasier for me to resist a mortals blood. I was able to operate on people and be a surgeon by the time Edward was in college. I thought I was strong., Carlisle frowned at his fingers, I was cocky and thought I could throw parties full of mortals and not be bothered by it. And thenwe invited you and Tanya to dinner that night. As I said before, Carlisle looked ashamed as he talked, When Tanya came in, her scent wastoo powerfulfor me. I fell in love with itvampires call ither bloodsang to me. Are you saying you had the hots for my girlfriend?, Edward frowned, repulsed. Not exactly., Carlisle looked at Esme, almost for help, Its a very rare thing, this blood singing to a vampire. Sometimes it never happens. I thought it was a myth. But I found outit isnt. I wanted to kill her, Edward. I wanted to drink her bloodso badlyI almost couldnt resist it. And for a split second, I didnt care about youyour motheror Tanyaor anyoneI just had to have it. Thats how powerful it was. Edward seemed to be thinking as he listened to his father in silence. I myself remember Edward telling me his father looked sick when he met Tanya and had to leave the room for a long time. I tried to come back in the dining room, for you, Edward., Carlisle said, I could see how much you loved herand I didnt want to hurt youand I could see I already was. I didnt want to lose you, just as we were beginning to start to have some kind of father/son bond. I tried to sit there and pretend to eatbut I couldnt do it. I kept dreaming of lunging across the table and having her, even if it meant I had to hurt you to get to her. So I ran out of the room and hid in my study like a coward. I wasnt in my right mind when I called you in that night, Edward., he stated, I was losing my sanity fastand the only way I could think to make you get out and take her with you to save her life was to say those things I said. At first, I hoped she wasnt a serious girlfriend and when you said you wanted to marry herI panicked. I knew if you married her, I could never see you again. We would lose you all over again. Eventually, the temptation would get too greatand I would eventually kill her and maybe even, you too, if you had gotten in the way. So I

threatened youI made you choose. And Edward, I know you wont believe thisbut I was so proud of you that night. You stood up to me like a man and you chose the woman you loved. And you walked out of the only life youd ever known. That takes guts, Edward. And I knewit wasnt because of me you had that courageJoseph raised you, with Katherinebut stillI was never more proud of you. Edwards eyes were a strange mixture now of sadnessand anger And to protect my girlfriend you also withdrew my college payments, put me on the streets with no where to live, and crushed my dreams of becoming a doctor., Edward added, Boy, Dad, you are one swell guy. Edward., Carlisle clenched his fists, Your grandfatherhas the gift of mindreadingknowing thingsit skipped over meand may be inside youbut, a week before you brought Tanya over, he called me. He said hes glad you found someone. Hes the one who really told me first you had a girlfriend. He said he was anxious to meet you. And he wanted to start grooming youteaching youyour job. So that after you had your first child, you could become vampire and take over your duties right away. With me, it was years before I could really judge other vampires. He didnt want to make that mistake twice. He told me to bring you to him. He told me you were going to be very special to our kind. Very special?, I asked, feeling violently ill suddenly, then I looked at Edward and whispered, Thats what Victoria called youyou said. I know., he gritted through his teeth, making a weird face at me. Esme and Carlisle exchanged looks but didnt say anything yet about what we said to each other. Anyway, Carlisle continued, When you said you wanted to marry Tanya, and in addition to the whole blood singing thing, I decided that I had to do whatever I could to hide you from him. I never intended on making you a vampire. I wanted you to have a happy, normal life. I told my father I didnt want to turn you at all. And that you wanted to be a doctor, like me. He said theyd come get you and do it to you themselves if they had to. So I had to cut all ties with you. Even financially, if I wrote you a check or even mailed a money order to you, my father would read that in my mindand find you. I told my father that you ran away and that I had no idea where you went. And since I truly didnt know, he could read my mind and know I was telling the truth. They searched for you all the time but I watched them. Whenever they got too close to the area I suspected you were in, I diverted them. I learned to train my mind to believe things likeyou mailed me a letter from Tennesee, or you called me from Mexico. It worked for a couple yearsbut then, my luck ran out. I told your father theyd never stop looking for you., Esme piped in, looking aggravated, You were the only link to making sure their vampire bloodline lived on. They werent about to give you up. And also, Carlisles father saw you were destined for greatness. He said you would be vampire royalty, more powerful than Aro! Whats an Aro?, Edward squinted, unimpressed. Carlisle smiled at his sons ignorance of the vampire world, happy that he was all human, and informed, Hes just a very important person in our world, thats all.

So, once again, you explain away all the things you did to me., Edward still sounded very bitter, I guess that makes it alright that I had to eat from garbage cans and sleep in the fucking cemetery! Edward gave a little laugh, Too bad the vampires didnt just look for me there with all the other stiffs, they couldve had me easy! Well, it was smart that you stayed in New York and didnt have any real address., Carlisle said, They didnt believe we were dumb enough to hide you right under their noses. You didnt HIDE me anywhere!, Edward shouted, You just threw me out like garbage and never cared where I was or what I was doing! We DID care!, Carlisle raised his voice, We were trying to save your life. We knew it would be hardand that youd hate usbut we did it for you, hoping that someday, we could What?, Edward sneered, Come back into my life and send me to college later, after the threat of Vampire Grandpa went away? We found out about you getting married., Esme decided to change the subjectbut I winced, knowing Edward wouldnt smile and say anything nice to her in response to that remark. Edwards eyes burned crueler now at her and he frowned as he said, Yea, it was nice of you to come. We got married in the police station with two fucking witnesses as our guests. No one from my side of the family! Well, unfortunately, thats when my father found out, too, by reading Esmes thoughts when she read about it in the paper. Thats when a full-out battle began between my father and I. He had tons of vampire allies on his sideI had a few very good friends on my side. For months, he tried to win me over to join him in training you, getting you back., Carlisle informed, But I never considered it. My father didnt want a war with me, but he said hed do it if I didnt give you over soon. We fought for months about it, always verbally, we hadnt fought physicallyuntil my father found out where you wereand that you were to have a child soon. Then the gloves were off. I even contacted Tanyas parents and, without telling them anything about us, I suggested he have you all move out to Florida near him. But he said things with his factory werent going very well, and he didnt know if he could offer you much financial helpand that Tanya was determined to make something of herself in New York. So that plan didnt go very well. Edward scowled, Dont even TRY to put down Tanyas parents. They didnt have much but they always helped us when they could and were always there on Thanksgivings and Christmases, they were at the hospital when Tanya gave birth to Katie, and they were her grandparents when youwere once againnot there. Maybe they couldnt give us moneynot that you ever didbut they gave us something more than moneythey gave us family. And even with all your Halloween stories, it doesnt explain why you never gave a damn about me! It doesnt explain why you never loved me! Edward, Carlisles face was sullen, Where is Katie now? Are you giving her all your time and attention?

Dont you even SAY her NAME, you FUCK!, Edward stood up, in a rage now. Hey!, I shouted at Carlisle, standing in front of and defending Edward, Dont you EVEN go there! Its because of you two slamming the door in his face that he had to have Ben and Angela take Katie in! If you wouldve helped him when he needed you Do you know how hard we fought to keep my fathers hands off Edward once Kaitlyn was born?, Carlisle looked full of fire now, Battles went on in the dead of night in the middle of New York that you dont know anything about to protect Edward and his family. A couple of my friends died in those battlessome were tortured and jailedand still are! Dont say that I wasnt there when you needed me, Edward. I wasyou just never knew it. Edward just stared at them without words, his eyes still ablaze with hardness. When I heard about the fire, Carlisle began as Edward clutched at his hair, turning away from Carlisle as he spoke while I just glared at him, I couldnt find my men anywhere. What men?, I asked. The ones that stood guard on your apartment building that night., Carlisle looked up and saw Edwards head spin towards him, his eyes wide. There were guards there that night?, he breathed. Every night, Edward., Carlisle gave a nod, I never left you unprotected. I still dont know if they turned on me, Carlisle said, Or if they were taken against their willor killedbutmy guards vanished into thin air, five good and strong vampires. I dont know if that fire was an accidentor not. So I dont want to make up storiesbut Edward looked lost in his thoughts, his eyes blank as he grabbed his hair again. Sowait, I said, putting my arm around Edward to keep him calm, What happened the night he came to your house then, with Katie? Carlisle let out a hard breath and Esme put a hand over her mouth, looking very upset. Edward, Carlisle gave a stern look into his sons face, Tanya was my singerand her daughters scent had five times the power that her mothers did. I could smell her coming from a mile away and I was salivating!! Joseph and Katherine had that night off and I was so thirsty for Kaitlyns blood it was crippling me! I had to make Esme go to the door and tell you to go away. She hated me for making her do that, but she was doing it to save her granddaughterand you, Edward. I had to lock myself in our panic room so I wouldnt break out there and take her from you. Thats when I told you to get away over the intercom. That was absolutelythe worst night of my lifehearing you screamingbegging me for helpI heard you and Kaitlyn cryingand I wanted to die right there on the spot. And Esme did, toowe almost broke up over that. I called in my best men to make sure you were safe when you left that nightand the next morning they said the little girl was taken on a plane to Florida. And I thought you went with her. I thought you were safely with Ben and Angela.

But if Vampire Grandpa could read mindssurely hed come find me over there., Edward squinted, still angry and cold. No., Carlisle looked down at his hands and added, I killed Vampire Grandpa that night. I didnt have proof of it, but in my mind, he killed Tanyahe almost killed Kaitlynhe was trying to take everything away from you so youd be weak and easily taken. But I stopped him. We killed some of his men in the processand as a judge, I executed a good number of them. I even have some in prison for life. Which brings me to now. Then Carlisle looked up and stared at Edward, not saying anything. Esme looked at Edward, again, as if shed cry any secondbut didnt. What?, Edward snapped at them. Edwardplease sit down., Carlisle suggested with a caring voice, his eyes tender, Please talk to me. I know you have no reason to trust mebut you can. I did agree Edward should sit down before he fell downthis was all so much to takeand I couldnt believe it, but Carlisle had managed to explain everything. I hugged Edward and slowly helped him back into the chair alone this time, as I stood beside it and stroked the back of his hair. You should be fairly safe now., Carlisle informed, Sohow are you doing, Edward? Fine., he lied, Katie is safe and Im fine. Edward!, I hit him in the back of his head and he growled at me, repeating, I. Am. Fine. You are NOT fine!, I argued with him, After all the things your father has told youyoure going to lie to him now? You truly believed all that CRAP?!, Edward seethed at his parents. Its not CRAP, Edward, its the TRUTH!, Carlisle shouted, standing up. I dont give a FUCK!, Edward shouted, tears in his eyes, I dont want you, I dont NEED you, and nothing has changed!! You turned your backs on me my whole life and I HATE YOU BOTH!! Maybe your fucking GUARDS are the ones that killed my family!! Its all because of you!! I want you out now!! Edward, wait!, I stood behind him, touching his back lightly as he started to throw them out. They didnt know what Edwards life had becomeor they were asking. Victoria had to know, too, what Edward wasshe called him very special, like Carlisles father did. She didnt just choose Edward for his looks, she wanted the special, future vampire prince he would become somedayand also, she owned him through that weird blood ritual Edward had told me about. What did that ritual mean? And how could we free him now? This is what I hoped Carlisle would be able to tell us.but now that he was asking Edward about his life todayEdward was afraid. Afraid to reveal what he had become in these last yearsafraid to be rejected by his parents once moreso instead, he was rejecting them first for a change.

GET OUT!!, Edward pointed to the door and Carlisle was shouting and so was Esme.this was utter madness! I just want to know how to save the man I love, DAMMIT!! Hes a SLAVE!!, I shouted out at the top of my voice and everyone shut up instantly. Edward looked at me like I just pissed on his shoes. Carlisle and Esme stared at me and then Edward, shocked and unable to speak. Im not saying anything else., I let my head fall in my hands and clawed at my hair. Edward would hate me nowthat was his to tellbut he wasnt going to tell ithe was going to tell them he was fine and have them leave thinking everything was just dandyand Im sorry, but I couldnt let that happen. Maybe these two could give me some help or information that would save Edward. They certainly do seem to careoh God, kill me now, please!! No one said anything for a long time and I looked up to make sure they were all still breathing and here. Yesall hereall looking pissed off and upset. Good. Bella is a little crazy sometimes., Edward informed, Im a slave at work, she meant, sometimes I work twelve hour days to make sure Kaitlyn gets all she needs. EDWARD, youre pissing me OFF!, I spun to him, shouting, Tell them the truth, DAMMIT, or I WILL!! His jaw clenched and he sneered, FINE! Strip me down, Im used to it, right?! No, Edward!, I cried as he tore his shirt open, the buttons flying as he yanked his arms out and tossed it across the room, extending his arms out as the lashmarks stared back redly at his parents faces. He turned around, slowly, in a little circle, showing his back to them next and Esme covered her mouth with both hands. Carlisle stared at him with pure regret in his eyes. This is the nice, happy normal life you wanted for me., Edward faced his parents with wet eyes, And this is only my chest, you should see the rest of my body. Edward, please stop!, I cried and tried to put my arms around him but he tensed when I hugged himand my heart broke and I let him go, taking a couple steps back, tears falling down my cheeks. Edward, who did this?, Carlisle asked with a weak voice. Thats my business., he hissed with a cruel tone of voice again, Dont tell me you havent been keeping track of me lately. Because you care so muchright? I was told you were living in Florida with Katie, Ben and Angela., Carlisle repeated. Well you were told WRONG!, Edward roared, his eyes murderous now, Youd better get some new people, DADDY, cause youve been kept in the fucking dark!! Im a whore, MomDadIm a pain whore. Which means I bleed and fuck for money. And if you come by the club on Friday nights, you can see me as a vampire, how ironic is THAT?! And I will do fucking anything for any money.

Edward, thats not the whole truthplease tell them, I begged. Oh, thats right., Edward snapped his fingers, I belong to Bella this weekwell, for the next four days. She paid twenty grand to fuck me for two weeks. Is that the whole truth, Bella? He winked at me and I almost sobbed out loud right there. Youre not going to push me away, Edwardand it wont work on your parents, either., I stated, trying to keep control of myself, So stop it now. Oh, come on, Bella., Edward smiled, Im sure my Mommy wants to hear all about what I can do to earn a buck. After all, its their negligence that led me to my current career. Oh my God., Esme closed her eyes and trembled. Yes, Oh my God., Edward nodded, He has fucked me over and over again and he never pays. Hes the biggest rapist of them all. Edward, your parents came here to be honest with you, I began but he cut me off. Im being totally honest!, Edward looked at me like I was crazy, Ask Victoria! Shes my owner. She bought me for 50 grand one night I was about to get my mouth raped by guns. See, my daughter needed this teensy operation to restore her lungs and internal organs so she could breathe and I didnt have the money or insuranceso I went to the dregs of the underworld for the moneyand I got it! Katie got her first operationand then I had no way to pay the dregs back. So one night I came about an inch away from being beaten to death before I was saved by a male stripper and fellow whore. Victoria, the woman who owns the club, came out, stripped all my clothes off, looked me over, and decided I was a hot piece of assand bought me from the dregs. So, lucky meno deathbut instead, lots of pain, rape, and humiliation. Since then, my life has been one big party after the next. I even have a recurring role in Men in Pain. They love my acting skills. When I get raped, they say the look of agony in my eyes looks SO real! The directors love that. I wiped the tears from my face and waited for him to pause and then I said, Your parents are still here, Edward. I dont see them leaving. Edward, Esme opened her arms as if wanting to hold Edward and she moved towards him a step but he recoiled backwards, screaming out with a frown as she froze in place, not coming any closer. Its okayI understand., Esme looked down, lowering her arms, Its because Im avampire No., he frowned in distaste at her, It has nothing to do with you being a vampire. He moved around his parents and went into the bedroom and came out with his duffle bag, picking up his torn shirt off the floor. My chest clutched tightly as I saw him go into the bathroom and take his toothbrush and razor, tossing it into his bag. Tears filled my eyes instantly again at this and I managed to croak out, Where are you going?

Home., he shot out roughly, not looking at me, No one there makes me feel this violated and thats saying something. EDWARD, NO!, I screamed as he opened the door and paused for a second in the doorway, looking at the floor at somethinghe hesitated for a second. Edward, please dont leave., I cried, Dont go back to her. Im sorry I said that, I just wanted to help you. Please stay and talk this out. Let us help you. He looked at me and I saw his eyesso green and filled with paintears sparkling inside them. Just let me go, Bella., he said in a low voice, and it cracked as he added, You cant save me. And then he looked at his parents with a look of disappointment, adding, No one can. He left, slamming the door behind him as I let out my deep, quivering sobs, and screamed, EDWARD! Bella, Carlisle held my arms firmly as I felt my legs almost give out. He was going back to HERinstead of staying here with me for the next four days?? God, why did I yell out that hes a slave?! STUPID!! That obviously humiliated him in front of his parentsbut they had to know!! I could faintly hear Carlisle and Esmes voice around me but my crying was out of control and too loud to make them out very well. Before I knew it, I was being carried to my bed and gently laid down on my back there. Shhhh.shhhh, Esmes voice was floating above me as she took my hand, Edward is very stubborn sometimes, Bella. That much about him I know. But he comes around after hes had a little time to kick a little bit. No, you dont get it., I sobbed, trying to calm myself so I could go after him, Hes going back to thatBITCH Victoria! God, why did I humiliate him like that? I just became every other woman hes ever known! No, Bella, you did a wonderful thing here for him today., Esme said, You showed love and care in every single thing you did today. Hell see that. Hes just mad right now. He takes after his father in this. Carlisle came back into the room and whispered, Bellacome here please. I stopped crying and wiped my eyes, following him down the stairs and to the door that led out into the street. On the steps outside, sat Edward, his head in his hands. Carlisle gave me a little grin and I rushed out there to himhe was crying quietly to himself as I sat next to him and gently put my arms around him, laying my wet face on his arm as he cried more. I cant leave, he finally breathed, sniffling, What the hell am I doing, Bella? Im so sorry, Edward., I cried, too, I never meant to make you feel violated. GodIm sorryplease try to forgive me Edward. I should have never said that

He turned towards me and held me tight and I felt a wave of relief and love pour over me. I love you, Bella., he whispered, Im not mad at you. You dont violate meyoure the one person whos built me up instead of tearing me down. If it wasnt for youId never have the guts to even face my parents like that. Im sorry I did that to you up thereI didnt know what I was doingI just had to get out of thereit wasnt you, Bella. Carlisle stayed inside but was smiling at us from where he stood, probably hearing every word we were saying. It was sunny out here so I suspected thats why they werent coming out to join us. What do you thinkabout what your parents said?, I asked, sounding like Dr. Bella again. I dont know, his voice cracked a bit, Its so fucking unrealhow could anyone just swallow all that? I know, I know., I held him closer, looking around us, seeing people walking back and forth past the stairs we were having our little scene on. Do you want to come back inside?, I asked carefully, We dont have to talk about anything for awhile, if you want a break. After a long pause, Edward said, Ill come back inside. I gave him a smile, admiring his courage and he took my hand, kissing it deeply as a single tear fell down his face, making my eyes tear up again. He smiled back at me and stood up slowly, helping me to my feet and we turned towards the door, opening it and going back insidefollowing Carlisle up the little staircase.

BPOV Thursday, Day 11 Edward had been a bundle of nerves all night last night and he was no better off today. All he had been able to eat since I told him about his parents coming was Saltine crackers. He said he always feels nervous around them, even as a child, because it was a rarity that they ever came home. I knew this was like another test for Edward. Every time they would come home, he would try to be what they wanted this timehoping theyd accept him and love himand they always left too soon. I could see he was doing that againhoping theyd finally want him. It was nice to see some hope in Edwards eyesat last. He had nightmares and he let me hold him, just like that first night Id given him the nightshirt. We didnt make love or play any games that night. He really didnt look up to it with the mindset he was in. And he was apologizing all over the place but I told him to shut upI told him I was tired and it was alright. Taking a

night off doesnt make us any less lovers and I told him so. He seemed relieved by that and tried to get some sleep as he laid his face on my chest and I played with his hair, gently curling my other arm around him. I hated hearing his dreamshe didnt tell me a lot about them but I figured some of them out. No, please, he pleaded, panting for air, Why? DAD!! That was the first one. I figured that was the night his parents met Tanya. I talked him back to sleep and finally he went under againand then this next nightmare came: Why are you doing this?!!, he cried, What did I EVER do to you?!! Tanya is dead, PLEASE!! DAD!! Shes just a baby, for CHRISTS SAKE!! Killers are fucking following us, PLEASE MOMMMM!!!! I had to shake him a few times to snap him out of that one. When he came to, his hands flung out and almost hit me and he was sweatingshakingthen crying and apologizing to me again. I hated seeing him cry and I clung to him for dear life, wondering if having his parents over was a good idea at all now. Look what it was doing to him. But then the psychiatrist in me said NO, Bella. Be tough. Edward has to face his pain and his demons. Hes run from them for far too long. He must see this through. Just comfort him and be there for him. Thats all you can do. All in all, I think Edward got aboutten minutes of sleep that night. And now he was staring at the TV, watching cartoons and chomping on Saltines as it neared 1pm, the time they would be arriving. He didnt say anything to me directly about it, but he went out at dawn and came back with five new outfits, and kept trying them all on, and changing themand trying them on again. He wants to make a good impression on themand that gave me a little hope. He almost wore a tie and although he looked very GQ in it, I thought that was a little too much, so he changed again. Finally, he stayed with a nice pair of gray slacks and a white button down shirt, long sleeved, the first two buttons opened. It looked dressy but at the same time, casual enough. He shaved very close and smelled awesome when he came out of the bathroom, complaining about his fucked up hair. I told him his fucked up hair is beautiful and not to mess with it. He wanted to gel it straight back so it looked neater. I wouldnt allow that and hid his hair products. Then I had to assure him six times that I could not see any of his lash marks through the white cotton of his shirt and he finally believed me and relaxedsort of. I kept gently assuring him that he didnt have to turn himself into something or someone else to impress them. They owed him the apologies, not the other way around. But I could understand his fears. When I came out of the bathroom, he was sitting on the sofa, his head back and his eyes closed. He didnt snore like most menI smiled, glad he was at least getting some rest before his parents arrived.

I left him alone for about twenty minutes when he began to talk in his sleep again. Oh no, not another nightmare! Poor little thing! I went over to him on the sofa and his head was slowly moving right and lefthis eyes moving rapidly under his eyelidshe was panting again. Wake up, Edward, I said loudly, shaking him until he jerked awake, opening his eyes at me, surprised and dazed.

EPOV I gasped when I saw Bella and felt my heart beating out of my chest. She smiled and that soothed meand she said, You were having another nightmare, sweetie. Are you okay? What?, I breathed, looking around for my parentsfinding myself on the green sofa where my father had been sitting a few minutes before, Where are my parents? They didnt get here yet., Bella informed patiently. Shes going to have me committed before our time is up, I know it. Not that I dont deserve it. I was laying back, seated on the sofa, and they werent there. Neither was my spoon-crucifix. Oh shit. Dont tell me Your parents should be here soon, I cant believe you fell asleep., she smiled at me, adding, But then, you didnt get any sleep last night, really. This didnt feel right at allI felt sickand that weird dreammaybe it was trying to tell me something Bella?, I stood up and went to her, taking her hands into mine. Please dont be afraid, Edward., she stroked my cheek, frowning and saying, Your skin is sweating. Wait. Let me get you a glass of ice water I changed my mind., I said directly to her, waiting for her arguments, I dont want to see themor even hear what they have to say. There is no excuse.nothing they say is going to make me feel better. I dont want them. I dont need them. They dont love me. How could they, after all theyve done to me? Let them stay dead, Bella, please. I dont want to hear whatever theyre coming to tell me. The truth isthey werent there when I really needed them. At this, the door was rapped lightly from the outside. I tensed and felt tears spring to my eyes as Bella almost turned a bit, towards it. I grabbed her by the hands and just pleaded to her eyes with mine, shaking my head slowly, hoping she would hear me. I cant go through it all againseeing them, confronting them. That dream had seemed so realexcept the dumb crap about the vampires and all. Where did that come from? She hesitated and was thinking about it as I took her face in my hands and gently closed my mouth over her bottom lip, my eyes still opened and displaying my decision into hers. I looked down at her face, feeling sad at her helpless expression, and kissed her top lip, without a sound.

She closed her eyes and shivered as I tried to apologize with my eyes nowI really wasnt trying to use my kiss to win her over to my side. The knock tapped on the door again and I released herlooking down a littleletting her decide what to do. Hello?, my fathers voice called and I felt even more rigid, Miss Swan? Bella glanced at the door and then looked at meI raised my eyes up to meet them and the second they met, she threw her arms around me, squeezing me tightly to her as my arms responded the same. We just clung to each other and after a couple more attempts, the knocking stoppedand I heard my mothers voice outside the door. Edward, she almost sobbed the words, I understandand I am sorry. Im so sorry. I heard Carlisle say, Come on, Esme., and their footsteps descended the staircase. I hated feeling like the bastard in the situation but I felt better already as I heard their car engine start outside and slowly drive away. Bella sighed and said, Well, that was brave of you, Edward. I know what Im doing, Bella., I peeked out the window now, seeing nothing unusual, Trust meyou have no idea what a fucked up dream I just had about themI just dont want them trying to justify themselves! They treated me like shit I dont care what their god damned reasons are. I dont want them trashing TanyaI dont think I could take it, Bella. I think Id lose control of myself and hurt them. Alright, calm down, Edward., she held me again, Im not going to force you to do anything you arent ready for. But, Edwardthey will call backand they will come back. I know you wanted them to save me, Bella., I said, seeing the pain in her face, Im sorry. But I dont want them to save me. Id rather go back to Victoria. Edward, she looked at me solemnly, Either way, you should know the truth. Bella, I breathed, Havent I sold myself enough in my life? Im not about to sell myself to THEM. I dont want their fucking money. Selling myself to strangers hurts less. Please dont ask me to kneel before THEM. Alright, alright, Edward., Bella held me tighter, I didnt think of it that way. Youre right. I wont make you talk to them. MaybeI could call them later onand talk to them myself. You dont have to hear what they have to say. I thought that over for a minute or twoI still didnt want their help, but maybe they did have something to say that might explain thingsall I could say was Maybe., I whispered into her ear. I love you, Edward., she said clearly and without regret. I love you, too, Bella., I responded, like a mirror, adding, Im sorry I messed up your plans. I know you were hoping theyd be the loving parents, all ready with some perfect explanation, ready to shower me with their millions.and I

could just walk away from my problemssmiling. Its a nice dreambut like I said beforedreams just dont come true. Some dreams come true., she argued gently, looking up at my face and stroking my cheek, Youre hereand you love me. I had to smile at hershe could always prove me wrong. Okaycorrection., I said, SOME dreams come true. Thats better., she pulled my collar down so my lips could caress hers. In the back of my mind, I realized we only had three days left together and I began to hurt insideeverywhere. Some dreams do come true. I married Tanya. We had a little girl that was the heart of my life. I had found love again after all this timebeing what I amBella still saw the good in me somehow. Yessome dreams come true. But I just cant keep them true. They spring to life and dance in a circle around memaking me smile and laughand then they fly away. It maybe would be better if my original statement was trueI wish dreams didnt come true. They hurt too much. My parents loving me was another dream I didnt want to come trueI cant endure anymore. I cant sit in the dark as another true dream flies off into the sunset. Losing Bella will be painful enough all by itself. In my dream just now with the vampires, I was truly destroyed when shed told my parents I was a slave. I hated her for a little mili-second thereand I really did want to leave. I nearly did. Even though my parents are assholes, I dont want them to know what Ive become. Im so ashamed and afraid they might already know. And I dont want to hear their awful reasons for turning their backs on me and my daughtereven Tanya, too. I dont care what the reasons are. It doesnt change anything. It doesnt change the pain and suffering I always feel in my bonesit doesnt heal Katies scarred fleshor her pain-mentally and physically. It doesnt change a thing. So I dont want to hear it. About an hour later, we were taking a nice walk around town, just being with each other, not talking much. I feared Bella was upset with me for copping out on my meeting with my parentsand I felt like a coward. But I really thought I was doing the best thing for my own sanity. I know I have to go back to Victoria. I know theres no out for me. I think, in Bellas eyes now, she is knowing that, too. So I didnt talk muchI just held her hand and prayed to the invisible God abovethat she would be alright without meand be happy again soon. She was having me tell her all about the dreamas corny as it was.how my parents had said they were vampireswanting me but not able to be close to me for my own goodTanya being my fathers singerthe whole tale about my vampire grandfather who wanted me to become one of themmy parents cutting me off to save my lifemy destiny as someone special in the vampire worldtheir difficult but necessary decision to ignore my cries for help when I held Katie in my armsthe vampire guards who may have been involved in Tanyas death in the firethe battles that went on in my namethe story of my father killing his father to avenge my familys painand finallybut most painful

of alltheir declarations of love for me alwaysthrough it alland their claim that they loved me stilland would help me now. I trembled as I retold it all, hoping she didnt laugh. If Bella could explain this dream to me, she was better even than I imagined. We were sitting under a tree on a bench when I finished and she gave my hand a tender squeeze. I told you, Im very good at analyzing dreams, Edward., she said first, I have a pretty good idea why you dreamt it all. Is it alright if I give you my take on it? Yes, Bella., I agreed, wanting her opinion. I thought shed say I was a loon. But she didnt. Alright, lets do one thing at a time., she had her notebook with her and was writing in it now, Firstyour parents saying their vampires. You, Edward, love things of fantasy and magic. You love playing vampire at the club, you love mythical creatures. In your mind, you have turned your parents into those creatures so theyd be a bit more attractive to you. In your mind, in your real memories, you see them in a bad light. In your dream, youve made them something that wasnt their faultand making them non-killing vampires, that was you wanting to believe the best in them. You made them good vampires. Like your fake vampire eyes at the clubgold for good vampire, red for bad vampire. She went on as I pondered that. This way, all through your childhood, when they werent around, this dream makes it, again, not their fault, not your fault, either. They were doing it all out of loveand you desperately want their love. You always have. Go on., I had to admit she is brilliant. She took a breath and wrote some more, then said, When they met Tanya, and said it was her scent that was the reason they didnt want her aroundagainthis makes it nothing Tanya didnot her fault. They liked her, reallybut because Carlisle is a vampire who wanted her bloodthats the reason it all fell apart. Nothing is anyones fault here either, not even your fathers. Do you see what I mean? Yes I do., I looked down at my own hands, knowing she was right. It speaks a lot about your heart, Edward., she touched my arm, comforting me, You want your parentsyou want it not to be their faultor yours, or Tanyas. You want to forgive them somehow. And not blame them for what theyve done. Even though there is a lot of anger at them for all they havent done. You could hate thembut your heart wants to love them. That is beautiful, Edwardreally! Finish your analyzing, Bella., I smiled weakly, wanting to hear it all. The vampire Grandfather being after you., Bella said, Is the evil of the world coming after youand in your dream, your parents have always tried to protect you and save you from iteven sacrificing having you in their lives to save you. In reality, you feel they didnt save youor care enough to save you from all the poverty, the being on the streets, the losing collegeeating garbageeven struggling financially when you married Tanyayour dream says your parents wanted to help and save you, but couldnt because it meant risking your life. It even says thats why they werent there for your big momentsyour marriage,

the birth of your daughterits all explained in the dream as them loving you but not able to be part of you. You want them to save youdeep downyouve wanted that all your lifeand they never have. I nodded, knowing she was right. She took a moment and said, The part about you being vampire royaltya prince if you were to become one of themspecialthat is obvious. You are special, Edward. But you dont believe you are. You always call yourself a whore, a toy, a slave. You want to be special. You want a fantasy world you can escape to where you could be something special and importantand have your parents be proud of you. More powerful than the highest King of the vampires. Damn, she is good at this dream shit. I just thought we fell asleep watching Interview with a Vampire or something. The battles, the dream of Carlisle killing the evil grandfather chasing you, Bella said, That speaks of you wishing your father ever stood up for youfought for youdefended you. You want that. You want your father to be brave and strongand a warrior trying to kill the things that are hurting you. And, she spoke sadly now, The fireyou desperately want to believe that there is someone to blame for that firethat there is a person you can hunt down and hurt because of what happened to Tanya and Katie. You want revenge and that is completely normal. You dont want to believe that this is a random, chance thing that happened. That it was a wiring problemand that the explosion just happened when it did. It was a terrible, horrible thingand you have no reason for why it happenedno answers of why it happened to Tanya and Katieand you. You even hate God because it happened. You blame him for it. You blame yourself for not being there. I felt tears in my eyeswondering why Bella was using all her talents on someone as fucked up as I am. God, Edward, its not your fault., she whispered, Please believe that, if nothing else. You were a little boya beautiful little boy. Whatever the reason your parents werent there, its not your fault. The fault is theirs. None of this is your fault, Edward. You have to stop punishing yourself. Tanya and Katie wouldnt want that. They love you. And last but not least, Bella said, You love your parents, too. Even after all the times theyve neglected youand hurt youyou love them. No, Bella., I groaned, as if it hurt me physically to hear what she was saying. She put her arms around me, kissing my cheek as I closed my eyes, feeling the wetness on my cheeks. Its okay, Edward., she said, loving me more than I deserved, Its good that you love themeven if they dont deserve that love. Dont hate. It will only hurt you insidenot them. Let it go. I clung onto her for a long time, letting her diagnosis sink in. Maybe she was right. I didnt know how to stop hating them, I wished I could just simply let it go. No, I couldnt stop hating them. They turned Katie away. Forgive them, in your heart., she stroked my hair, You dont even have to see them or talk to themjustgo to your heart and tell them you forgive them. It

will take tons off your shoulders, Edwardreally. Youll seewhen youre ready to do that. Bella is rightand my parents might come back. If they do, I will face them myselfI dont know if Ill forgive thembut I will remember the dream and the meanings behind all those weird things I conjured up, and I will try to face them like a man. The part about me, Bella said after I quieted a bit, You fear me turning on yourevealing you as a slave. Youre afraid thats how I truly see you but Im not saying it to you. You fear me betraying youand you didnt like the feeling of hating me for that minute of time. You want to believe you could easily pack your things and run out. But then you were on the stairs, unable to leave. You dont want to leave me. Youre rightevery wordis right., I admitted with a soft voice, stroking her fingers as they held my other hand, I do trust you, Bella. But that scares me. Everyone I trust lets me down. And I keep asking myself, why youd want me. Everyone in my world has an ulterior motive. I keep wondering if you have one, too. But then I look in your eyesand I see youI see that youre real. And that youre not lying to me. See that I love you, too., she jerked my chin towards her, making me look into her face. I smiled and responded, I do see that. And I hope you see that in my eyes, too, Bella. I do love youso very much. We cried together and held each otherand the people walking by didnt even seem to notice us. We were invisibleand it was amazing. What are we going to do?, Bella cried, almost to herself. I didnt have an answerand it broke my heart. After a long time, I made her walk with me againand I tried to make her smile again. I made myself turn playful again, and eventually, it seemed to work. Later, we ate giant subs, sitting outside in the balmy weather, not needing to fill every minute with empty talk. We were like an old married couple sometimes, just needing each others company to be happy. You know whats really strange?, I asked Bella as we walked on the sidewalks, I cant think of any games to play with you now. I just want to make love to you again. In bedthe boring, old fashioned way. I laughed and so did she. It wasthe best night of my life., Bella glanced back at me with a sexy smile, I never knew it could be so I know. I agreed, fascinated by it as much as she was now, I hate to say it, butI dont think I ever reached that feelingeven with Tanya. I think thats why I was so afraid to make love that way with you. It was like I was cheating on her. That feels so wrong to say out loudbut its true. And I know you love everything true. She grinned at me and squeezed my hand, I love true. So thats why Im telling you this now. Uh oh. A secret? God, no, dont let it be something terrible.

My father is coming., she said, as if she just confessed to being a man or something. How nice for him., I joked, Whos the girl? Euuuu!!, she hit me in the chest as I tried to block her, unsuccessfully, Shut up, thats my DAD! Alright., I let myself be serious now, Why is he coming? Bella looked at me, almost ashamed, and answered, HonestlyI dont know what else to do. I had a feeling youd reject your parents, so, I called him after I got through to Joseph that day. Hell be here tomorrow night. Hes not staying with us in our place. Hell be at a hotel. But when Im really lost, I call my Dad. It might sound stupidor a little girl thing to dobut I couldnt think of anyone else who could help us. Are you mad? I felt half my mouth smile as I breathed out a whisper of a laugh, No, Im not mad. I did all this to us. I put all the pressure on you, making you feel you need to save me somehow. And the more I tell you to stop trying, the more you dig in and fight for me. How could I be mad at you, Bella? I just feel bad you made your father waste a whole trip here. What can he do for me? You dont know until you let him try., she still had hope in her voice. I wish I could sound that way. You didnt tell him that you and I, I hesitated, That we sleep together, did you? I left that out for now., she said and I relaxed instantly, but then she added, I thought that would be better said face to face. Bella, no!, I stopped walking and she turned to me, looking confused. Dont tell him, Bella., I almost demanded, You dont have to ruin your relationship with your father just because I was too scared to face mine! I wont let you do that. What if he does to you what my father did to me? He could stop paying for your classes, your apartment! You cant tell him, Bella. I wont mind, Im a good actor. I can pretend we never touched each other. I can stay somewhere else while hes here. No, Edward., Bella smirked at me, leaning on my chest, I dont want to lose five minutes with you. Im not ashamed of us. Are you? Of course not., I felt hurt that shed even think such a thing, Besides my daughter, youre the best thing that ever happened to me. But from her end, she had given up her entire inheritance to me, a male whore who had been fucking her for ten days and nights now. In publicin a CHURCH!! Oh God! Besides all that, Bella started to walk again, holding my hand and pulling me along behind her, I dont want you out of my sight. Thats why I didnt go back to school yesterday or todayand Im not going tomorrow. I dont want anything happening to you while Im gone. I can take care of myself, Bella., I smiled, loving it that she wanted to protect me. As if she was a great fighter. Hell, I can beat up four guys now all by myself, thanks to Emmetts lessons.

If Victoria came to my place during the day, while I was at school and said, Time to come home, Edward., what would you do?, she challenged, smirking, as if she was so sure of my answer. I hated that. She knew how owned I was. I stopped walking and Bellas hand broke away from mine as she took a step or two more, turning her head to me. At least you can see my weakness clearly., I muttered, feeling unworthy of her again. Oh, stop it, Edward., she gave me a look that I didnt like, and she grabbed my hand, Its not you being weak that holds you to herI didnt mean to make you feel that way. I just meant, she could take you away at any time, and wouldnt even give you time to leave me a note or anything. Ever since that night I tackled herIve been worried that shed steal you away from me. And I dont want to let you go yetever. Only Bella could take me from feeling like nothingto being a King in a few sentences. I took her in my arms and placed a very deep, passionate kiss into her mouth as she clawed my back a little bit, thrilling me with sweet little pains as I touched my tongue to herstasting her, sweet peppermint. Your father is going to hate me., I informed as we slowly came out of our kiss. My nose was still touching hers when I said this, waking her out of her dream that everything was going to be alright. I know., she admitted, But hell get over it. And he will help you. Hes a good cop. Hell lock me up., I smiled, amused by that vision myself. I wont let him do that., she kissed me again, Im the only one who gets to lock you up. I laughed and kissed her back quickly, then said, Hell punch me in the face, then. I violated his daughterin many, many ways. And Im a whore. Hell drag you to the hospital to get checked out. Hell probably sleep in between us the entire weekend. She giggled, imagining that, I could see him doing that. But Im not a child anymore. I wont let him do that. This weekend is ours. I wont let him destroy it for us. Saturday night., I said, kissing her with a little smile. What about it?, she kissed me back, just as briefly. We have a date., I informed, A specialdress up date. We do?, her eyes lit up a bit. We do., I confirmed, I know you dont like fancy and dress-up, butI want you to see me in a suitand I want to see you in a dress. I want to dance with youand I want to play the piano for you.

I will dress up, she agreed with a grin, I would do anything to hear you play. But the dancingyou could get hurt, Edward. Im tougher than I look, Bella., I assured, taking her hand and slow dancing with her on the sidewalk, See, were practically dancing right now. My feet arent moving., Bella laughed and I looked and saw she was right. She was just rocking back and forth, but kept her feet cemented in place. Cheater., I accused softly, kissing her forehead, still dancing with her. A moment later, I heard myself saying, Please dont tell your father that you slept with me, Bella. I dont want your life ruined. You have a good strong bond with your father. I can tell by your stories of him on our first date. Dont throw that away for me. I do have a good strong bond with him., she said, Thats why I can tell him anythingand I know hell still be there, loving me anyway. Even if hes disappointed in me. I know his love for me is forever. Weve been through too much together for me to lie to him now. Besides, how can I ask you to give me the truth always if I lie when its convenient for me? I sighed and envied her belief in her father. I had to admit the truth again. You are so much stronger than me, Bella., I said, knowing it, I wish we had more timeyou could teach me that. Im not giving up on you, Edward., she said, clinging to me tighter, Dont you give up yet. You couldnt teach your kind of strength., I said now, thinking better of it, It has to be born in you. You have it, too, Edward., she glared into my eyes, Its just buried. It will rise up again. That dream I had, I started to walk again, my arm around Bella, taking her with me, I screamed fuck you at my father. I told him off. It felt so good. You wouldve been proud of me, I think. I shouldve known it was a dream. In real life, I never do that. If you can dream ityou can do it., she replied. Im sorry I chickened out today., I said, really feeling awful, Youre so brave and Im so Shut up, Edward., she put a hand over my mouth, Before I stick a ball in there.

EPOV Cant think of any games, huh?, Bella shoved me into a classroom after she gave me a tour of her college campus. It was evening now and most of the classes were over and the halls fairly empty. Even now, this classroom, without the lights being on, was very dim and dark, but not completely black.

Oooh, the classroom, I said, internally smacking myself for not thinking of it before. I had thought of it before. But deep down, I didnt want to jeopardize Bellas standing in her school, and I had rejected the student/teacher scenebut if she was instigating this, who was I to complain? I wonder if shes going to be the student or the teacher? I couldnt wait to find out. I just stood there, waiting for her to begin. You wanted to see me, Mr. Cullen?, she chose to be the student.I wanted to exude a wicked laughI am an evil teacher. It occurred to me that she didnt want to keep placing me in the sub role. She wanted to see me in true dom mode. I think she enjoyed my apartment rapist fantasy a little too much for her own good. I dont really WANT to SEE you, Miss Swan, but Im forced to., I made my voice cold and full of ice, going to the desk and leaning my ass against the edge of it, crossing my arms, What the hell was that paper you wrote for me? Please tell me thats some kind of a joke, Miss Swan. She looked at me, as nervously as if I were a real teacher of hers. I couldnt tell if she was really afraid of me, or if she was acting. If she was, she was incredible. What waswrong with it, Mr. Cullen?, she asked timidly. What wasnt wrong with is, Miss Swan?, I huffed, I could get better thoughts out of a six year old! What exactly didnt you like?, she asked, looking defeated already. Its not my job to point out all your mistakes!, I scoffed, I shouldnt even be talking to you about it now. I should just fail you and let you repeat the course all over again next termwith me. She looked down and I stood up straight now, coming towards her. That just makes you sick to your stomach, doesnt it?, I squinted, Living through another year with me? No, Mr. Cullen Yes, Miss Swan., I scowled, I know you hate me. To be honest, Im not that fond of you, either. But were stuck with each other. She let out a breath and I was near the blackboard, taking the long pointer stick into my right hand. But I think I know a new way to make you learn., I announced and her eyes raised up to my cruel gaze. Come over here and raise your skirt., I commanded. What?, she looked more afraid now. God, youre pathetic., I seethed, Come over here. And. Raise. Your. Skirt. I spoke slowly as if she had a mental problem.

She glanced at the door out and I didnt let my emotions show. Go if you like, Miss Swan., I shrugged, Im not holding you prisoner here. But know this if you walk out before I dismiss you, you will keep failing my classand youll never graduate. Can you really afford to sit here until youre thirty, Miss Swan? Now do what I said., I demanded, my face frowning at her. She came over and lifted her skirt, showing a new pair of pantiesone of the ones she bought that day with the girls and Emmett and JasperGod, its sexy! Red laceyumm. But something else was happening inside me. I didnt want to hit her with my stick. I didnt want to play. I waited a minute of twowaiting to see if my mean teacher character would resurfacebut he was gone. Bella?, I asked, frowning, hoping she wasnt disappointed in me. Yes, Mr. Cullen?, she asked, still playing her role. No, Bella, I put the stick down in the blackboard shelf and moved her skirt down, turning her towards me, holding her arms gently. Is it okay if we dontdo this?, I asked, looking towards the floor. She looked at me and smiled this dazzling, beautiful smile. Whats the matter?, I asked, afraid shed start laughing at me. What do you mean?, she asked, waiting for me to explain. Im so tired of playing gamesand rolesand scenes, I confessed, honestly, I mean, if you want me toI will, for youbutcan we just go home and make lovelike we did the other night? She let out a breath and I noticed now she had tears in her eyes. Bella, Im sorry., I touched her face, Never mindIIll play with you Shut up, you little dope., she wept, smiling, taking me into her arms so tightly I almost winced, I am so glad to hear you say those things, Edward. I was hoping you would say it. That was a test?, I smiled at her, the little sneak strikes again. She gave a little nod and I let my smile unfurl across my face. You little creep., I brought her in for a huge, hard kiss. We werent playing school anymore but I enjoyed about twenty minutes of making out with Bella as she laid on the teachers deskI was half laying on her chest and her legs were wrapped around my ass as my erection threatened to take her right there, even ripping through her new panties if necessary. Lets get out of here., I suggested at last and in minutes, we were runningracing each other back home to Bellas place. We were little kidsfree and unafraid.

As we climbed up the stairs to her apartment, I scooped her up into my arms and put her on my back, holding her legs around my waist as I leapt, two stairs at a time, to get to her door so I could kick it in and make passionate, sweaty love to her all night. But when we approached the door, there was a white envelope sticking halfway under it. I recognized my fathers handwriting and the last half my name ARD showing before we unlocked the door. If anything could kill an erection of mineit was anything to do with my father. Rest in peace, erection. Ill miss you. I put Bella down on her feet and unlocked the door. I hate my father. I had finally felt alive againfreeand youngand now theres some letter here from him. Bella saw it too and didnt say a word as we went inside. She picked the letter up, seeing my name in bold letters written across the envelope. Closing the door behind us, I knew we had a decision to make now. Do we read it and deal with whatever it has to sayor burn it and forever forget them?

23 BPOV We sat there, staring at the envelope as if it would jump up and start dancing by itself at any moment. Be patient with him, Bella, I scolded myself. You have no idea what this could say. Let him take his time. But there is no fucking way hes burning it before we read it. Sorry, Cullen, not on my watch. Finally, he remembered I was there and looked up at me sheepishly. Im being a wimp again, arent I?, he asked, ashamed. No, Edward, youre not., I put my hand on his, hoping my eyes showed support, I know your pain with them runs long and deep. Youve gotta help me, Bella, he said, struggling internally, clutching his hair with the hand I wasnt holding, What should I do here? Well, lets look at this rationally for a minute., I took a breath and tried to take the emotion out of this. I picked up the envelope and Edward almost jumped in his skin that I dared to lift it off the counter. I stopped for a second then smiled at him, showing him I wasnt opening it yet. I felt the envelope between my thumb and fingers. Its thin, not bulky., I observed, It cant be all about your whole childhood, then. Unless it just says, Were vampires. I tried to joke but Edwards eyes looked up at me, squinting, with a scowl. Sorry., I offered, looking at Edwards name on the envelope.

Its probably one page, knowing them., he sounded bitter, glaring at it, They cant even give me an hour of their time to write a long letter to me. Too much troubleits just me, after all. Maybe its a check for a million dollars., I held it up to the light overhead. Ukkk., Edward frowned more, I would hate that even more than a one page note. Throw money at him, and hell go awayand their conscious is clear. No. If it is money, I am burning it. In Hell!, I let escape out of my mouth. Edward looked at me blankly. Sorry, I winced a little, I just cant see burning a check for any amount of moneymy father had to work like a dog to make ends meet for usI would just get sick to see you do that. Besides, it would be for Katie. It would help Ben and Angela It would kill me, he finished my sentence and I looked at him in confusion, not understanding him. How do you think I would feel, doing all Ive had to do to get money for Katieand then, in five minutes, my parents just drop this big check in my lap and cover it all?! Now, at this point in time! It would almost be like I did it all for nothing!! I understand., I admitted, seeing his distress at this being money now. He cringed, staring at his own name on the envelope. Your name is written very nicely, a calm hand wrote this., I observed next, The handwriting is bigthats good. Small handwriting is selfish. Big, open lettersthat shows a generous nature in the writer. Bella, Edward growled, suffering over this. He wanted an end to his misery. Okay, Edward., I gave his hand a squeeze and decided, Im opening it. He sat up, tensing as I took control of things and looked at him first. No matter what this says, Im here., I looked into his eyes, deeply, Nothing will change the way I feel for you. Well get through it. Yes? He swallowed and licked his lips nervously, then gave a little nod. Yes., he let out a hard breath. I really hoped it wasnt some one page explanation. Edward deserved more than thatmore than a note. I wanted them to face him and tell him the truth. But thenwhat is the truth? Will it break him more to hear it? Or is it better left unknown? I tore open the back of the envelope. It wasnt that glued together. I took another breath and opened the nice, heavy paper that was folded in three. Hotel paper from the Waldorf Astoria. Edward stared at me, his eyes so fragile as I read to myself, silently. Dear Edward,

We were here a couple of times today, hoping to speak to you. We know you have every right to refuse us, but we do hope you will change your mind and see us. What we have to say cannot be put into a letter or spoken over the phone. We even wrestled with the decision of telling you anything at all. We dont want to hurt you anymore. You are the one innocent person in all this. But maybe Miss Swan is right. If you are still hurting over the past, and Im sure you are, then you need to know the truth. It may help you. We are staying at the Waldorf Astoria, the number and address is on this letterhead. We will be here for a week or so, and if you dont contact us, we will completely understand and never bother you again, if that is your wish.. We do apologize, Edward, for everything. We failed you. We were terrible parents. We still are. We know we cant fix that, ever. But we love you. I cant even write that without feeling shame and guilt, but its true. Believe it or not. Whatever you decide, be happy. Love, Carlisle and Esme Cullen God, they couldnt even write Love, Mom and Dad. Okay., I breathed a bit of relief as he stared at me. What does it say?, he asked, Wait. Do I want to know? Its not bad. They dont tell anything in this letter. They are saying they will be in town for about a week, and if you want to see them, the choice is yours. They say they love you. His eyes took on a glassy look as he looked at me deeper. They do?, he asked, almost in disbelief. Would you like me to read it out loud?, I let my hand dance down his beautiful, sad face, Its alright. He hesitated and then swallowed a few times, looking at the floor, then finally looked back at me. Yes, Bella., he said, putting on a brave face, Please read it. I took my time and read the whole letter to him. I wished Carlisles words werent socarefully chosen. I wished there was more emotion in his sentencesbut this is probably who he is. Articulate, polished, exact. Also, cold. My father would never promise to leave me alone from now on if I wasnt ready to talk to him in a weeks time. He would forever keep trying to say hes sorry and make it up to me somehow. I really hate the idea of walking into their hotel or them coming here now, and me not knowing what bombshells theyre going to drop on Edward. What if Im not good enough to help him through whatever theyre going to say? Maybe I should talk to them first, before Edward. Thats common in psychiatry. I would hate to bring James into thisbut if his parents say something devastatingI will

have to. I cant let Edwards suicidal thoughts, even from long ago, rise up again. I also dont want to betray him as he feared I would do. When I was finished, I looked at his face and he looked a million miles away. Are you okay?, I asked, taking his hand in both of mine, letting the letter lay on the counter between us. He didnt speak for a little while, his eyes were eyeing the perfect penmanship of his father on the paper. At least it wasnt a check., I smiled, hoping hed join me. His eyes raised up to mine again and he looked so lostI hated seeing him like that. You dont have to decide anything right now, Edward., I said, We havetime. I had almost said we had three days left and I had almost said that he would be leaving me on Sunday. I want to crybut I cant. I have to be iron now. Edward needs me. Three days., Edward said with a sober voice, daring to say it out loud. Edward, I trembled inside. I will talk to them., he suddenly decided, Will you ask them to come here? I dont want to see them at the Waldorf. Its more fitting that its herewhere my therapy has been. Where Dr. Bellas office is. Now he gave me a little smile and I had to smile back. I still cant believe how much youve changed in only ten days., I marveled out loud, Youre not the loveable little scamp who once asked me right out in a restaurant if I ever sucked cock before. He laughed and my heart swelled with joy. I know., he agreed, Youre a very talented doctor, Bella. But more than thatyoure my best friend. And the girl of my dreams. I leaned forward and held him, snuggling my cheek next to his as his lips kissed it innocently. Youre the girl of my dreams, too., I joked and we both laughed again, and I added, more seriously, And youre my best friend, too, Edward. He sniffed but his smile was still playing on his lips. That nightat the Chinese place, Edward said, I lied to you about my fortune. I smiled more at his devilish smirk. Im glad I had something to say back in response. So did I., I stated, seeing his eyes light up and find mine again. You DID?! Do you want to know what mine said?, he asked, smiling like his old selfby that I meant the happy, go-lucky soul he was when I first met him ten short days agobut they werent really short. We had crammed a lifetimes worth of feeling into our brief time together. It seems like 100 years ago.

Of course!, I squeaked, dieing to know now. It said, Love is the only medicine for a broken heart., he informed, looking into my face with a caring but sad gaze. I kneweven then.., he looked down at the counter, And you being Dr. BellaI knew you would find the right medicine for me. But I was afraid to tell youI didnt want to fall in love, with anyone. I am supposed to be unattachedIm supposed to love everyonenot just one. We are stupid., I agreed, But I dont think we had much choice in it. Some gods are up there, pulling our stringswatching how this will all play out. And the gods can be very cruel when they play with mortals. Edward knows that better than anyone. What did yours say?, he suddenly remembered to ask me. I smiled and looked down for a second, then kissed his mouth softly first. Then I whispered it. The one you love is closer than you think., I breathed the words into his ear. We smiled at each other, like a bird and a fish that somehow had a moment togetherknowing it wouldnt last longbut enjoying it anyway. Either we were meant to fall for each other, Edward said, Or that Chinese lady set us up. I laughed out loud, snuggling my face into his neck as he held me, kissing my face. That might be the answer to all this madnessthe Chinese waitress! She must be destroyed!, I feigned a little anger, hearing his laugh. I thought back to the beginning of my time with Edward. He was so happy and playfuland in control. I was the scared little mouse and he was the confidant lion. But now I can see that he was acting back then. I feel like I really have Edward with me now, even if its not all fun and gamesI have the real Edward Cullen now. And I love him. I dont want to let him go, ever. And although I wished I never dug into his hurt soul this deeply, to bring all this sadness out of him, I still believed it had to happen. To get him to be truly happy, he must deal with the pain inside himand conquer his demons. I had to believe I was changing him for the better, even though at the surface, it looks like I had turned a carefree, smiling young man into a sad, trembling one. Will you be with mewhen they come?, he asked, getting back to his parents, nodding towards their letter, needing me. And I loved having him need me, right or wrong. At the same time, I didnt want him to need me this much. What will happen if he has to leave? Hell be alone. So painfully alone. Ill always be with you, Edward, you know that., I said, as if it was obvious. It sounds like they have some bad things to say., he said like a little boy, What if its something awfulsomething I cant live with?

Dont say that, Edward., I almost frowned, No matter what they say, you can handle it. You have to be strong. Youre a father now. You dont have the option of being weak and breaking. Got that? He took another breath and looked at me, looking stronger in seconds, now that I reminded him of Katie. Got that., he nodded, Thank you, Bella. Thank you for being my friend. Always., I smiled, kissing his lips, four small kisses. Sunday., Edward said as he closed his eyes, coming in for another kiss, We can have my parents over on Sunday. In the morning. I want the whole day and night with you, just to myself. His mouth opened and took me in, softsmoothwethottongue slowly enteringfinding mine. I heard Edward moan and I half opened my eyes as he kept kissing me, harder now, roughly, as if he wanted all of me now. Bella, he moaned my name again and I knew that voice. He wanted menow. The counter was between us and I whimpered back in response, wanting him too. How could we go from such a sad moment to this in three seconds? We are really meant for each other. Before I knew it, Edward kept kissing me but he crawled over the counter like a hungry tiger coming after its prey. I gave a squeal at his agile leap. I tripped as I stepped backwards and we were blissfully on the living room floor now. Edward threw the coffee table away from us with one hand as I shouted in surprise into his open mouth, his tongue struggling against mine. My recorder, I muttered as he smothered my mouth with hot, wet kisses, almost taking away my air. But I wasnt complaining. Bella.session one, Edward breathed, moaning a little as he tried to open his shirt buttons, then jerked it open, breaking some of them in the process as he kept kissing me, placing his shirt over my eyes like a bunched up blindfold. Dr. Edward, I panted, grabbing his hair in the back of his head, I need your helpbad. I smiled, liking this as he grabbed my hair, turning my face aside so he could assault my neck with his tongue and biting teeth. I gave a little shriek as one particular bite pinched with a hint of pain. How does that make you feel, Bella?, he said in between some heavy, wet kisses, his lips smiling a little above me as I let myself fall into a daze, needing him to hurt meto be savage with me. I moaned in response to his question and added, Yesyestear my clothes off meplease!! Without a word, his fast hands were at the cleavage of my thin spring blouse. He grunted like a caveman, and yanked a couple of times, and I heard the fabric rippingand the air touched my bare midriff and the tops of my breastsand I grunted back, a dumb animal feeling pleasure, not thinking at all.

A second later, I heard Edward mutter, Fucking bra again! And he tore it apart with no effort at all, exposing my breasts to his hungry mouth. I cried out, loving it and his arms moved under my back and yanked me up to meet his wet mouth betterhis perfect lips closing over my nippleshis teeth bitinghis tongue lapping me. My fingers wove themselves into his hair, jerking and grasping, holding his face closer to my body. The shirt he laid over my eyes fell off but he didnt care. Next, I felt him quickly unbuckling my jeans, yanking them open, hurting the zipper a little as I panted harder, feeling him pulling them off me with no hint of delicate slowness. He had to take my sneakers off me first and that annoyed him too. I nearly laughed. He growled to himself, ordering, Stay., before he got up and quickly went into the bedroom, coming back with a condom in its wrapper in his teeth. His pants were already half down when he entered back here and I smiled at his naked penis, fully erect and monstrously large, ready to attack. That is, until Edward placed its nice black cover over it. Dr. Edward I said as he was already back on top of me again, parting my legs and tasting me, his slick, hot tongue quivering itself into the thin, eager flesh waiting for it. He lapped at me as if there was no tomorrow and his fingers dug into my ass, serving my hips upwards to his mouth. Bella, he breathed as he licked me harder, I think I can help youI think I know what you need. I had to smile and close my eyes as he gave me what I longed for. He swirled his tongue in and out of my pussy, fucking me with his tongue. OH SHIT!!, I screamed out, almost ready to cum just from this alone. How does he spin his tongue like that ? I started swearing like a sailor at him until I was screaming with no wordsand I didnt even care what I looked or sounded likeI was screeching out, cumming so hard, clinging onto my own hair, my fists needing to clutch at something. Without a word, Edward pierced himself into me, letting out a gut wrenching holler that aroused me even more. I scratched at his scarred back, and felt the faint oval shaped bite mark on his ass that was nearly gone. I wanted to make my mark on him, somewherebut felt like Ravens horrible marks had ruined that for me. But then I got a great little thought. I perhaps have made my mark in himand it will not heal and fade in time with new flesh. I hope my mark is inside himone no fingers or whips could ever touch or erase. He was ramming himself over and over inside me and I just moved up and down under his body, gasping and heaving, my eyes rolling back into my head as my back arched up more. His sounds were driving me mad with desire and my hips kept thrusting up to meet his pelvis as it drove up and down over me. Edward started to shout even louder at this, making inhuman soundsgroans and grunts of raw lust and pleasure.

After a sweet forever had seemed to pass, he laid on top of me, trying not to lean all his weight on me as I clung to his wet body, still incapable of speech as his arms shivered, too, holding me to him as if it hurt for our bodies not to be pressed together. It was so hotand it was dark outside now. I loved it that I got this idea and grabbed the back of Edwards wet hair, making his face look at mine. He looked a little surprised at me as I said, I want to fuck you on the fire escape now. Move itand bring condoms. I saw his mouth turn up at the corners as I wriggled free and ran to the window, opening it and peeking outside first. Edward stood up, watching mewanting to see if I really had the guts to go out there. I stepped out there and giggled, letting my shame go, standing out there, grabbing the iron ledge bars at my waist, flinging my long hair to one side as the breeze played with it, making it fall sexily over half my face. Oh fuck., Edward said clearly and loudly, and his naked body raced into the bedroom, hurrying back and climbing out the window to join me. Bella, you little exhibitionist slut!, he sounded proud of me as he said the words, standing outside with me, unembarrassed at his own nudity outside. He looked up over my head and smiled, a wicked little grin coming to his lips. Reach up and hold these bars., he reached up and showed me the ones he meant. I reached way up, straining to curl my hands around the thin black bars above me. I was on my tip toes now, breathing a little heavier as I saw Edward smile wider, showing teeth at what he was seeing now. He cupped a hand under my right knee and raised it up, placing it over the ledge bar. He let my other leg stay straight, my toes pressing the floor below. Very nice., he approved and I let out a little breath, peeking around me, seeing I was safe. Even if I fell, I was in the center of the fire escape. I wouldnt fall off. And I trusted Edward. He wouldnt let me fall. I let my head fall back a bit, closing my eyes as his hands began to explore my body. He began at my one foot on the floor and tickled under it, where it was arched and I let out a little scream. With a smile, he kissed my ankle and nipped at it while I tried to keep my balance, my hands holding on for dear life on the bar overhead now. His mouth slowly kissed up my leg, playing for awhile around my kneecap and then aroused me as he licked and kissed with tongue up my inner thigh. Getting down on his knees, he said in a low voice, Im kneeling before you Bella. Finally. No., I breathed, not wanting him to serve me that way. Relax, Bella., he began to lightly stroke between my legs with his sure fingers, I WANTto kneel before you. Youre the one personI can honestly fall to my knees withI love belonging to youI DObelong to you.

I remember him saying that to me in the beginning I love belonging to you. Back then, I knew it was a lineand it had made me feel sad. Now I wanted to fly and scream it to the heavenscelebrating it. He was teasing me now, taking small little licks into my already sensitive pussy as I hissed out, clutching those bars with my hands as if I were hanging over a deadly drop below. His expert fingers spread me open and his mouth rose up, sucking and opening, closing, movingtongueing every little crevice and hidden little space within. I kept saying his nameEdwarrrdddd.Eddddward.Edward. Soon it became not a name but a wonderful sound I was makinga magical word that meant this powerful feeling inside me, a spell that was cast over me. I didnt say anything else except that the whole timeand I felt his sweet fingers playing where hed just painted with his tongue and hot saliva. I could feel three fingers nowmoving in different directionsinand slowlyoutand in again. UGGGHHHH!!!, I tossed my head way back, seeing the city upside down as my dark hair hung out behind me. I screamed louder, seeing people on the sidewalks in the distanceshops still open for business. I didnt give a fuck. Let them hear me. Let them be jealous of me having this sensuous god all to myself. He was holding my knee that was over the ledge securely with his free hand, making sure I was secure and safe. Fuck, Bella, I want you now., his voice sounded urgent after I came and my eyes were hardly open as he moved around behind me, holding an arm around me, right under my breasts and arching me backwards against his chest, giving my head a nice flesh and muscle pillow, my lips finding his neck and kissing anywhere I could reach with wild abandon. Then I felt his cock, covered by a new condom, pressing against my melting pussy lips and then penetrate upwards into me, and I screamed out again, hearing his voice give a very low groan as well. Hold those bars, Bella., he took a step back and was holding my propped up leg over his strong arm now, and he raised and lowered me to his savage cock, his hips pumping up and down along with my falling and rising body. Damn, Edward IS strong, I realized as he worked me. Part of me thought this is a good workout for his arms, as he didnt get to work out at the gym much while he was with me. I was screaming and so was Edward. I hoped no cops were getting calls about us right nowimagine if Edwards parents tried to come to the door now! Fuck, Im gonna cum, Bellaplease, he panted, wanting me to come before he finished, Ill hang onwait. Then he was furiously pounding himself into me and that was it. I came right there and then, and was yelling it at him. Im cumming!! Im cumming, Edward!!, I screeched, God!! YES!! Thank God no little kids live around my place. Id feel so dirty now.

He let out a roar of relief and growled out and I felt his body tense and then relaxhis vigorous pumping stoppedand there was a warmth inside me.and I knew hed come too. I dont think I couldve held onto the bars for another second, and Edward scooped me up into his arms after he withdrew out of me. He was kissing my forehead as he crawled us back into the apartment and took me into the bathroom. I was half out of it but I remember him placing me in the empty tub. In seconds, the red hot sensation of flowing water was upon my ankles and legsand Edward closed the drain, letting a nice hot bath run as my eyes tried to focus on his perfect face above me. He quickly took care of his condom and slipped into the tub with me, seated behind me, letting his legs open and allowing me to lay back on his body as the water began to rise up around our weak, sweating bodies. My poor baby., he said in a low voice as he rubbed the palms of my sore hands with his fingers, under the hot waters touch at my sides, Im sorry, Bella. It didnt hurt much at all nowand I didnt notice my hands with all that was happening to my body on the fire escape. I just smiled and enjoyed his caring touchfeeling his kisses on my palms next. Dont apologize., I said, still feeling high and wonderful, I love it on the fire escape. He laughed but kept caring for my hands, working them with his thumbs now, very firmly in the centers. Ive created a monster, havent I?, he asked, placing a soft and long kiss on my cheek. Definitely., I smiled, proudly. The Bride of Frankencock., he said, Shes alive! Alive! We burst out laughing and Edward explained to me who Frankencock was. You named it?, I kept laughing, And after a monster? That says a lot about you. No, dont analyze it., Edward whined, Just leave it alone. I dont wish to be committed by Dr. Bella. That would keep you from getting away from me., I had to admit, Ill just lock you in my own little rubber room, in a nice, tight straightjacketand no pants. Mmmm, its the opposite of your no shirt rule, huh?, he commented, moving his fingers over my breasts under the bathwater, his foot pushing the knob to the wall, shutting off the water pouring into the tub, I like the sound of that. What would you do to me in that little padded cell? I would come in, wearing the shortest little skirts and tightest little blouses, I began, And I would pull you up by the hair and make you answer my questions. We would have lots of good therapy. And after we finish our talks, I would shove you down on your back and administer someoral examinations on you.

Ohhhh yessss., Edward smiled big and let his head fall back a bit, Im loving this idea more and moreand then what, Dr. Bella? I would be cruel and tease younot letting you cum right away., I played, Everytime you get close, Ill stop and watch you poor little body squirm in its jacket, and watch your beautiful green eyes plead with me. God, you evil bitch., he smiled and laughed a little, Tell me more. Then Id slip off my panties and stuff them into your begging little mouth., I fantasized onward, hoping he knows Im just making all this up. In reality, I could never harm this man. It would be worse than cutting or hurting myself. Those will taste good., Edward imagined it as he listened to my fable. And then Id get you nice and hard again with my mouth, I said, And Id straddle youand have my way withFrankencock. I almost couldnt say it out loud without laughing. No condom?, he was amazed. Nope., I said, Youd be all mine in that room. Youd never have to wear a condom with me in our little fantasy world. Cool., he sounded pleased, as if I were reading him a fairy tale. And then if you were very good, Id come back later and feed you., I smiled, imagining myself feeding Edward a nice, wet cherry. Paradise., he hummed, closing his eyes, And the Frankencocks lived happily ever after. I giggled, still amused by his name for his monster penis. I kept picturing it green with little bolts sticking out of each side. Tomorrows Friday., he said all of a sudden and my eyes opened, and my heart cracked in about one hundred places. I know., I whispered, hearing only the little movements of water around our bodies. His arms tightened around me and I clung to them, too, not wanting to think about Sunday being our final day together. I love you, Bella., he said simply. I let a heartbroken breath escape my lips and I responded, I love you too, Edward. Ill always love you. He turned my chin to him and closing his eyes, he was kissing my lips with a very gentle and innocent mouth. Always., he breathed after his lips finally released mine.

Today is Friday, Day 12 BPOV

Edward seemed much happier today as he helped me make lunch for my father. He was singing and joking around with me all day and I was glad. I hoped my father handled the news well today. Hed have to be a saint not to get angry. The first thing Edward said to me today was, and in the happiest voice I ever heard him use, Hey! Im gonna get punched in the face today. I assured him he wasntbut then I thought about it. Maybe he would. At least I know Charlie wouldnt be wearing his uniform and gun over here today. Thats a plus. You know how to block a punch, right?, I asked Edward during breakfast and he nodded, not looking all that scared. Again, he didnt fear physical pain or punishment. He was more worried about what Charlie would do to me in response to what we had to tell him today. I asked that he not be here at first when Charlie came in so I could talk to my Dad alone before he met Edward. But Edward refused to do that. He said I had been there always for him, and would be there when his parents came back, so he would not abandon me now, either. I deserve to be punched, Bella., he finally admitted, Let him do it to me. Itll make him feel better and maybe hell respect me afterwards. Its a guy thing. I wont hit him, if thats what youre worried about. I wouldnt hurt your father, Bella. Ill just hold still and let him hit me. I promise. I believe youand thats why Im mad., I argued, I dont want my Dad hitting youand I dont want you holding still so he can, either. Besides, he might mess up the pretty face. I squeezed his cheeks together and kissed them and giggled at how cute he looked this way, his full little ducky lips all squished together. Please stop that., he raised a brow and I released him. Victoria will go ape shit if you come back there with a black eye or something, wont she? I mean, wont you get in more trouble?, I asked, then got mad at myself for even mentioning the bitchs nameor the thoughts of him going back there. No., he stirred the soup, I can just tell her you were hitting me in play and it happened. I heal pretty quickly. Besides, Ill be out of He stopped and I looked up at him. Turning quickly, he was chopping the salad, not saying anything now, his brow creased. Youll be out of what?, I frowned, not liking this. Ill be out ofband aidsif I, he hesitated, a bad liar. Liar., I accused, Say what you were going to say, Edward. He clenched his jaw and stopped chopping lettuce, looking at me. Ill be out of circulation for a few days, once I go back., he said, I have a few days of punishment waiting for me when I get there. I slammed the plates down on the counter, making Edward jerk in his skin. Because of me attacking Victoria.

Charlie is coming., I said in a low growl, almost to myself, He will help us. There has to be a law against this. Do you know how long pimps and whores have walked the earth, Bella?, he sighed, Legal or not? Victoria is dangerous. I wish your father would just stay out of all this. I dont want him getting hurt. I dont want you getting hurt, either., I felt tears in my eyes, looking at him. I signed up for this., he began to chop the lettuce again, Ive accepted the money, I signed the contract. Im no victim in this shit. How can you SAY that?!, I shouted, picturing him in that fucking cage at Fire again, with Victoria ordering him to kneel. Because its TRUE, Bella!, he raised his voice, then looked sorry as soon as he did it, Im sorry. I shouldnt yell at you. ListenIve been thinking, Bella suggested, her voice shaky, Maybe we can make this work, even if you have to go back to Victoriafor a little while. Bella., he put his knife down and began to move forward, to come and comfort me. No wait., I felt tears in my eyes, panicking, Maybe Emmett can somehow stay in touch with mefor awhilejust to let me know how you areVictoria wont know about it. Please dont do this, Bella., he pleaded, his hands moving up and down my arms, Why dont we just have a nice visit with your father? Tell him Im some boy youve been seeing from school. I am going back to Victoria, theres nothing anyone can do for me in the next couple of days. And you cant have any contact with me after I leaveIm not allowed to have girlfriends. Shell hurt you if you come around. You cant do that. Its alright. You tried your best, and its more than anyone else has ever done for me. Even if you did find a way to free me by some miracle, Id never know how to fit into a normal lifea normal job now. Just promise me you wont come after me when I go. No!, I yanked away from him, hating him, hating that he wasnt willing to try or fight harder. Bella!, he called, about to say something when the door knocked, a playful rap on the other side. Edward looked at the door and then me as I rushed to it and unlocked it, seeing the familiar white, blue, and gray flannel shirt, opened, with a white t-shirt beneath it, dark blue jeans, sneakers, the spiky, mussed black hair, with a hint of gray at the templesthe dark eyebrows almost hiding the soft sparkle in his dark brown eyesand his smile. Dad., I felt myself cry as I flung my arms around him, unable to hold in a few tears and sniffles as he hugged me back, his hands patting and rubbing my back. He was never very good with the crying girl moments. Hi Bells., he sounded like he knew already something was wrong. I didnt think of it right awaybut then I remembered he could see Edward standing behind me, in my kitchen, helping make lunch. He probably suspected Edward was the one making me cry now.

Dont cry, honey., he tried to comfort me and make me stop, Its okay. Im here. Come in, Dad., I offered, and finally let him come inside, looking down and trying to stop my chin from quivering as my father eyed Edward, entering. Dad, this is Edward Cullen., I introduced them, controlling my emotions, or trying to, Edward, this is my Dad, Charlie Swan. Nice to meet you, Chief Swan., Edward stepped forward and respectfully gave my father a nice, firm handshake and I had to admire the scene while it was still friendly. When I first met Edward I felt sad thinking this meeting would never happen. But it was. Too bad theyd be fighting soon. Well, at least my Dad would be. Oh, you know Im a Chief, huh?, Charlie grinned, not very outgoing with new people, I guess Bellas been telling you all about me, then. Edward smiled at me and then my Dad. She only has great things to say about you., Edward informed, letting go of my fathers hand now, Shes told me everything about your fishing adventures together. Oh, do you fish, Edward?, Charlie asked, crossing his arms, in judging stance. Uh oh. No, I never have., he admitted, But Ive always wanted to. Im a city kid, mostly, but I would love to give it a try sometime. Charlie gave Edward a little grin, admiring honesty. I know hes looking at how handsome Edward is and hes not liking that. Maybe I should let them get to know each other better before I tell Charlie the whole story. Maybe we should eat first. Dad., I sat him on one of the stools at the counter outside the kitchen and felt a little grossed out that Edward had tied me to one of these, naked, and now my father was possibly sitting on the same stool. Edward and I have made you a great lunch., I informed, We made your favorite, steak and potatoesand salad. And soup., Edward stirred his soup and turned off the fire below it. And soup., I repeated, feeling very nervous now. Get it together, Bella. Is something wrong, Bella?, Charlie asked, never being a fool and never missing it when something was bothering me. Its one of the disadvantages of having a cop for a father. I cant fool him. Well, yea, but we want to talk to you after lunch, okay?, I asked and now my fathers eyes were on EdwardGod only knows what hes thinking. And before you start, I said, Im not pregnant, Im not getting married, and my grades are fine. Edward turned to Charlie, smiling a little, but Charlie did not look amused. Without a word, Edward turned back around to spoon his soup into bowls.

We ate, making lots of small talk. Edward was very good at drawing Charlie out and making interesting conversation with him. I didnt know Edward was such a baseball fan, but they talked about it for over 30 minutes while I watched them interact. At one point, Edward even made my Dad laughand that was fantastic to see. Once we were finished, Edward began to clear the dishes away and Charlie found that a little odd, going by his expression. Forget the dishes for now, Edward., I said under my breath to him, We need to do this now before I lose my nerve. Bella, please, think about this first., he whispered to me, still not sure what I was doing was going to be good for me. I told you, I dont care about being yelled at, I want to help you, and whether you like it or not, I am going to, now come!, I jerked his arm and he stumbled after me as I led him to the living room. Lets sit in here, Dad, okay?, I cleared my throat, plopping Edward down on the green sofa in his favorite spot during therapy. Charlie got up from the counter and took a little sip of his beer, putting the can down on the counter top and moving over towards us. I sat beside Edward on the sofa and Charlie took the chair across from us, where Dr. Bella usually sits. Bella tells me you have a big problem., Charlie looked at both of us now, wondering what it could be, So, let me hear it. Alright, but Dad, here are the rules., I leaned forward, You have to listen to us until were finished. You have to swear not to yell too much when were done. And you have to swear not to become violent. I told you, Bella, its a guy thing. Its alright if he does., Edward tried to argue with me now but I told him to shush. Then he looked at Charlie and said, Any reaction you have is alright. Its okay if you yell orbecome violent. I would if I were you. Ive heard every story there is, Edward., Charlie scratched his cheek, I doubt you two are going to tell me something that drives me insane enough to yell or become violent. Go ahead. Alright, Dad., I said, taking a breath, This is what happened. You know Im majoring in psychiatry. Well, I needed to choose a personan interesting person to study and do a paper on. I did have someone picked outand at the last minute, they bailed on me. I had two days to choose someone. So I went to this club in town called Fireand I met Edward there. Edward gave a weak smile as Charlies eyes darted to him, almost burning him a bit with their stare. I work there., he tossed in. Edward is a dancer there., I stated, watching my fathers face. Nothing yet. Just a stern look as he waited for the rest of the story. I asked Edward if I began but Edward cut me off. Let me say it, please Bella., Edward looked at me and I gave a little nod.

Chief Swan, Bella had asked me to be her subject for her paper., he said, But I told her I dont work for free. I charge womenfor my time. Bella didnt want to agree to something so sordid, butshe was desperate for a person to do her report on. Soshe hired me so she could.study me. Stop making yourself sound so sleazy, Edward., I frowned, Its wasnt like that. I went after you. Charlie was clearly frowning now, not liking any of this talk one little bit. The thing is, Dad, that since Edward has been talking with meas Ive been getting to know about his life., I said, Its like this. Edward is working for this Victoria woman who runs the club he works at. But he doesnt just work for hershe owns him, Dad. Its a long story and it will take a long time to tell, but Edward is being held by her against his will. She makes him do the mosthes a slave, Dad. And women pay to hurt him and attack him. Thats what I need your help with, Dad. I need you to help me set him free. He doesnt want to go back. And we only have three more days together before he has to go back to her. Edward was looking down at the floor as I was telling my father all this and now his eyes met Charlies. Youhired him?, Charlie was keeping his face stone, his voice still calm. He was in interrogation mode now. Edward looked at me and swallowed. With what?, he asked, You have no Then he stopped and frowned at me harder. His eyes widened and he said, so dangerously low in his voice that it even scared me. Your inheritance?!, he growled, My mothers money?! Dad, I know that I tried but was cut off. That was her whole life SAVINGS, Bella Swan!, Charlies eyes were very angry now and his voice was loud, She gave it all to you! So youd have some security someday, to start a family, buy a home or a business of your own!! She believed you would be smart and take care of that money! And you bought a whore with it? I didnt even take the second to see Edwards reaction I sprung to my feet and towered over my father as he kept sitting in my chair. DONT YOU DARE CALL HIM THAT!!, I had tears in my eyes, Dont ever say that word again!! Hes not a whore! Hes trapped, CHARLIE!! I called you here so you could help him!! Bella, stop., Edward was trying to calm me down, standing up behind me, gently placing his hands on my arms. Charlie leapt up and shouted at Edward. Take your hands off my daughter!, he snapped. Edward didnt say a word but I felt his hands release me.

Cant we all sit down and go back to calm talking?, Edward offered, hopefully, Bella is a very good therapist and I know more things get resolved when theres no yelling. At this, I decided to be the first one to calm myself down, knowing he was right. But if Charlie insulted Edward again I was going for his throat. I sat down where I had been, next to Edwardand eventually, Charlie sat down too. He was scowling at Edward now and I didnt like that either. Edward was making full eye contact with Charlie now, no longer looking at the floor in shame and that made me very proud of him. Bella doesnt like that word whore., Edward said calmly, I call myself that all the time and she takes my head off for it, too. I know what I am, Chief Swan, Im not denying it. But you want my help to get out of it., Charlie said coldly, staring Edward down. I dont think there is a way out for me., Edward said, honestly, Bella loves to solve problems and shes been a very good psychiatrist and friend. She doesnt want me to go back to my life, as it is. She wants to help me. And I admire her for thatbutI just dont think its possiblein the next three days, or maybe, ever. And its very dangerous. Victoriais part of a criminal family, if you know what I mean. People helping me could get hurtI dont want that. Bella wanted to call you for help and you know how hard it is arguing with her. How much did she pay you?, Charlie didnt seem like he was listening to a word Edward was saying and that pissed me off. Dad, does it matter?, I clenched my fists, keeping my seat. I want to know!, he shouted, keeping himself in the chair. Twenty thousand., I clenched my eyes for a second, then glared at him. Edward looked down and then at my father again. I swear, Chief Swan, if I could, Id give it all back to her right now., Edward said with a tone of sadness in his voice, She has given me so much The entire inheritance., Charlies eyes almost hurt me when they looked at me. He looked utterly disgusted with me. I never saw that look touch me before from him. Edward looked like he wanted to help fix this but I wished he would stop talking for a second. He was pissing Charlie off even more by trying to explain. Thats my fault, Sir., Edward took the blame, I didnt give her a choice. Did you sleep with her?, Charlie was glaring at Edward now, ignoring me, as if I wasnt even here. Edward hesitated and was about to answer when Charlie lunged at him. The hesitation in Edward gave him his answer and before I could react much, Charlie had Edward by the shirt, against the wall as a couple of knick knacks fell and crashed to the floor.

You little SLEAZE!!, Charlie gritted through his teeth as he slammed Edwards back against the wall again, You fucked my daughter!! For MONEY!! DAD!!, I screamed, pulling on Charlies flannel shirt to make him stop, Youre hurting his back!! STOP IT!! Edwards whip marks would open if he kept slamming his back that hard and I didnt want my father causing him more pain, not to mention the pain of being called a sleaze and a whore. Im gonna hurt a lot more than his back!!, Charlie growled, slamming his back again to the wall as Edward let out a small pant of breath. DAD, STOP IT NOW!!, I tried to grab Charlies arms that were like rock, pinning Edward to the wall. I also noticed Edward wasnt even struggling or begging to be released. He was just taking it. I know how you feel, but Im not sorry., Edward said in his own defense, looking right at Charlies twisted face, Bella is my best friend. And I know you love her, too, so I dont blame you for wanting to hurt me. So go ahead. I wont fight you. Dad, dont!!, I nearly cried, unable to pull my father off. Bella, please, get out of the way., Edward looked at me, Youre gonna get hurt. Charlie drew a fist back and watched Edwards face as he did it. Edward let his head rest against the wall behind him and closed his eyes, waiting for it. Dad, dont you hurt HIM!!, I leapt on my fathers back, my arms around his neck, I love him!! Calm down, Bella., Charlies voice was calm again and he dropped his fist, still looking at Edward, Im not going to hurt him. I breathed a sigh of relief and let my fathers neck go, landing to my feet as Charlie slowly let Edward go, taking a step or two back from him. Why?, Edward stayed against the wall, stunned. I cant hit a man whos not going to fight back., Charlie informed, Its not right. Thank you Dad., I heard myself saying, sounding eternally grateful. Its not that I dont want to kick your ass. I do. But I can see you care about her., Charlie said, still looking at Edward, Telling her to get out of the wayI was just about to tell her the same thing when you said it. I dont like itbut it is what it is. I smiled a little. Thats what Edward always says. Charlie sat down in the chair I gave him earlier and let his head fall into his handsanother Edward move. They are more alike than they know. Are you alright?, I went to Edward as he straightened and took a step or two from the walland there was a little blood on the wall. I think so., he said before I shouted.

Your back!, I yelled, feeling instant fury, I knew IT!! Shit., Edward said as I brought him to the kitchen, ordering, Take off your shirt. Bella, Ill take care of it in the bathroom., he began to argue but I wasnt in the mood now. Howre you going to reach your back alone?, I asked, OFF! He sighed and unbuttoned the shirt, removing it and letting his head drop a bit as I wet a clean washcloth with warm water, gently dabbing the little lines that had fresh blood on them, feeling tears in my eyes as it blurred my vision. Jesus Christ., I heard Charlie from the living room and Edward let out a ragged breath. He was seeing Edwards chest from his viewpoint and the marks Raven had inflicted there. What the hell?, Charlie was slowly coming forward, towards Edward. Whatd you think we were kidding, Dad?!, I almost hollered at my father as he silently came into the kitchen where we were, and he got a good look at Edwards back now. Damn, Charlie said as he watched me cleaning the blood off Edwards skin. They were just beginning to heal, thank you Dad., I couldnt hide my anger at him right now. Its alright., Edwards voice was brave, It doesnt hurt. I wouldnt have called you, here, Dad, if it wasnt an emergency., I said to my father at my side as I worked, I didnt have to tell you anything! I know youre angry and hurtand disappointed in mebut we dont have time to deal with all that now. Im in love with Edwardand he loves me. We didnt plan it and we know its impossible, but we cant help it. I need to save him, Dad. Look what they do to him. And this is only part of the physical pain they inflict on himyou have no idea what theyve done to him on the inside. I knew there was something more to it when you closed your eyes and waited for my fist., Charlie was addressing Edward now, I saw that once beforea kid. His father used to beat him regular. I saw the man raise his hand to his son and the kid froze and waited for itjust like you did when I had you. Edwards face half turned towards us but then he looked straight ahead, letting out a little breath. They call him a pain slave., I said gently to my father as I began to apply the ointment, the blood all cleaned away now, They do the most terrible things to him. This is nothing, Edward told me, compared to what they usually do to him. Tell me more about these people., Charlie said and I felt as if I might cry out loud. This meant my Dad wanted to helpand know more. I reminded my father that this is the Edward Cullen I had him to the background check on, that I lied about Rosalie dating him. I reminded him of Edwards pasthis daughterthe fire. The more my Dad learned the less he wanted to beat Edward up. He didnt exactly love Edward and want me to marry him one day, but he understood, I think.

We didnt go into great detail about our arrangement at the beginning of how Edward was teaching me sexually just as I was teaching him to deal with his pain and past. We didnt need to tell him everything. We did assure him we always used protection when we were together and my father almost lost his lunch at that point. But the basics were shared. I even confessed to attacking Victoria at the cluband told how Edward defended me and got me out of there. Edward told him more about Victoria, the club, the other dancers there, how he came to belong to her, and even about the threats they make to him about his blood being used to frame him and then talked about her promises of harming his daughter if he ever tried to leave. I noticed Charlie stole one of my new notebooks and began to take notes on what Edward was saying. Edward almost laughed at that, remembering me with my notebook, seeing the family similarities there. I just shot him a look and he hid his smile. Finally, Edward said to my father, after the fifth page of notes, Please, Chief Swan, this is getting to be too much. My daughter could be hurtor killed if this isnt handled right. And so could Bella. I cant risk this. Edward, Charlie looked straight into Edwards eyes, Nothing is going to get better if you dont try. Someday, they will hurt your daughterand everyone you care about. People who keep slaves and hostages are huge cowards. They only have power because of your fear. Youre damn right Im afraid!, Edward shouted back, Thats my daughter! And thats my daughter., Charlie nodded towards me, Shes in danger now, too, and I wont tolerate that, Edward. I have to do whatever it takes to make her safe again. If you care as much as you say, youll do the same, for both Bella and your little girl. Soare you inor are you out? Edward smiled at me, remembering me saying the exact same thing to him as I drove him away from Ravens that night. Yes, I stole that from my father and he knew it now. Im in., he said, looking very nervous. I knew he was worrying about his daughter and I admired that. I gently rubbed the back of his clean, new t-shirt, assuring him it would be alright. I know what Im doing, Edward., Charlie further assured, I wouldnt do anything to get a child hurt. I cant guarantee I can wrap things up in three days, but Ill do what I can while Im here. Thank you, Chief Swan., Edward said with real feeling, I can see where Bella gets her courage and brains Charlie hated getting compliments but he scoffed and said, She gets her looks from her mother, lucky for her. Dad., I frowned and my father actually smiled a little. He looked at Edward again and said, Andyou can call me Charlie, kid. Oh., Edward looked more relaxed as he grinned and said, Thank you, Charlie.

Dont get too comfortable, Edward., Charlie frowned a bit, I might still hit you, later. Alright., Edward agreed, You know where to find me. My father was headed towards the door and I guessed this meant he was leaving for now. He turned to me and didnt lower his voice as he said, really, to both of us, I still hate this whole thing, Bella. Dont think Im not mad as Hell at both of you right now. I know, Dad., I did feel bad for my father, I knew this would be a lot for him to take. I hated that I had to involve him in this. But at least Edward was doing his job, as sick as it is., Charlie gave Edward a look, then said to me, But Bella, you know better. Were not done talking about this. I know., I felt tears come to my eyes. I had really hurt him and I could see that in his eyes. Ill be around., Charlie didnt hug me right now and I understood that, I need a little time to thinkand Ill start checking things out. At that, he raised his notebook and eyed Edward for a moment. Please be careful, Dad., I said, knowing he was smart enough to handle this without my help. I always am., he said, no emotion in his voice, See ya. He didnt kiss me goodbye, either, but I knew Id have to give him time. My Dad was walking down the stairs, taking him out as I closed the apartment door, turning to Edward. He looked deep in thought about something else and I went to him, carefully putting my arms around him so I wouldnt hurt his back anymore, I think that went pretty well. 24 EPOV Edwardsessioneight?, Bella looked at me, unsure. I think its seven. I tried to recall but Bella shrugged and said, Anyway Hi Edward., she greeted me like this every time and it always made me smile. As if I hadnt seen her since the last recorded session. Hi Dr. Bella., I grinned, sitting on the sofa as she had her usual chair across from me. So, Bella took a little breath, looking towards the window to her right, So much for my Dad not letting our problem upset him. She gave a little grin so I let my face smile back at hers, hoping she wasnt hiding her hurt at her fathers visit an hour ago. I hoped she knew she wouldnt have to hide it from me. I could be here for her, too. I know., I remembered Charlie saying that hed heard every story and how ours wouldnt make him yell or turn violent, So much for your rules.

She was digging her pen into the notebook paper in her lap, and her jaw was a little tight for a second. It looked now like she was upsetand she didnt talk. Her eyes were cemented on her notebook. Is she sorry we told her father? Does she feel Im not really worth the huge rift that lied between her and Charlie now? They were so close when Charlie first came inand now Bella?, I began, I am so sorry. I still cant believe you did that for me. Silly Edward., she put on a brave face for me, I did it for usand I would do anything for you. I love you. I would die for you. That statement was the equivalent of a knife piercing my chest. My mouth fell open and I felt sick for a secondthinking of TanyaVictoriathe fucking danger of all this now. Dont ever say that again, Bella., I heard myself say in a stern voice. Im sorry., she realized what I was feeling and it showed in her face, I didnt thinkI didnt mean She sighed and changed the subject. Sohowd you like my Dad?, she asked, trying to smile more. I liked him., I said without hesitation, But he was way too kind to me. He shouldve hit me. You wanted him to, didnt you?, she asked, knowing me too well. Yes., I was done trying to hide or lie to Bella at this point, I know it was wrong of meto take your money like thattomake love to you for it. Ive screwed over so many girls for moneywhen Charlie had me against the wall, it was likefinally one of their fathers got their hands on meand now maybe I could pay for some of what Ive done. I know how it made me feel, Bella said, When my father called you whore andsleazebut...how did it make you feel? I looked at my hand for a few seconds and almost lied and said I was used to thatbut I admitted the truth. I hated it., I confessed, looking at her briefly, I wanted Charlie to like me. He was very cool during lunch and I felt like he was liking me a little bit. Thenwhen we told himthe way he looked at meI felt so disgusting again...I usually feel that way, but, lately, with youwhen were aloneI dont feel so dirty. Im clean. And Im not doing anything wrong, somehow. I almost forget Im a prostitute when I kiss you. And I didnt use the word whore, so you cant get mad at me. She gave me a little smirk and I smiled back, glad I wouldnt get in trouble for speaking the truth, at least the way I see it. Im not so sure I love the word prostitute, either., she said. How about hooker?, I teased. My father is usually so calm., Bella said, Hes seen a lot and he doesnt often get tooemotional.

This is different., I pointed out, This is you now. Youre his only daughter. I know exactly how he feels. If I were him, and you were KatieId have beat my ass beyond recognition! Bella shook her head and let a little smile grow on her lips. Charlie is like you., I went on, He wants to help people. At first, when you wanted to get my shirt off, I hated that. Charlie would see. But then, when he did seeI could tell he cared. Like me or not, he is still a good cop. He wants to protect the weakand rid the world of the bad. Its great that youre going to be a doctor, a psychiatrist. You can reach people and help them before they fill up your fathers jails. You can prevent horrible crimes from happening at all. I never looked at it that way before., Bella brightened a bit and I was happy I was the one to make that happen. And youre not weak., Bella added, And my father does like you, too. Even though he might not show it right away. He realized, as we told him more, youre both single fathers trying to do the best for your daughters. I bet my Dad would do the same for me if he were in your shoes. Yea, but you saw his first reaction to me., I reminded, This is what I told you before. He wanted to hurt me. He hated me. Thats everyones initial reaction to someone like me. That is why whores dont get help. Bella sighed loudly and said, He is helping you! Because he loves YOU., I stated, not wanting to start a fight with her. Are you sure about that?, she looked a little angry now. Bella, I looked at her until she made eye contact with me again, He loves you. Hes just upset now. Hell forgive you. I promise. She stared down at her notebook, not talking. The proof of that is, hes helping us., I spoke softer now, Frankly, it gives me hope to have two Swans on my side. Not that the first wasnt enoughI just feeltwice as protected now. She smiled at that and I wanted to talk more about the thing that was gnawing at my mind and heartalwaysit was almost crippling me, this never fading, inevitable Monday. But Bella, I made my face turn serious now, We both have to prepare ourselves for what may come. I very well may have to go backyour father even said so. No., she again, didnt want to face it, Ill make my Dad arrest you before I let you go back. That thought almost made me laugh. Not a bad idea On what charge?, I grinned, Prostitutes who get arrested get out as soon as the bail can be posted. Cops dont even care enough about us to hold us for a whole day. And then Victoria punishes me for seven days instead of six. Jaywalking, then., Bella huffed, Excessive hotnessfucking on fire escapes, whatever!!

If fucking you on fire escapes is a crime, then let me be guilty., I mocked the old Obsession commercials and I snickered, hoping she got the joke. She half smiled and gave a little laugh. Your father would have to have something real on me to arrest me here., I informed, This isnt his town. Tell me youll be brave if I have to go back. Just say it, at least. I will be brave if you have to go back., she said blankly, staring at her book. Liar., I smiled, shaking my head a couple times. She threw her notebook down and her head fell in her hands, little whimpers were coming out of her. In seconds, I was holding her, kneeling on the floor as she clung to me, crying into the crook of my neck while I stroked her hair. It may take a little longer than a couple days to get me out of there., I said quietly, Your father might need more time. I can hold on and wait. Id wait forever for you. I cant, she wept, I cant let you go back to all that pain alone Youre so strong, Bella., I repeated, reminding her, Youve made me strong. Ill be alright. So will you. Fate hates me, I wanted to tell her. She never lets me have what I love. She waves it around in front of me, dangling it over my nose as I try to leap up and catch it in my teeth, having no chance of capturing it. Maybe she, too, is a wicked dominatrix who enjoys toying with me. Maybe Bella will be better off not being fates carrot, tempting and teasing me. I wish you could just forget me once Im gone., I admitted, and as I said the words the thought of it made my blood freeze in my veins. Too late., she said as I stroked the tears off her right cheek, Were chained together now. If you bleed, I bleed. Bella, I breathed, closing my eyes, You are one crazy bitch. This made both of us laugh and we held tight to each other. Things were getting way too depressing and sad these last couple of days. I wanted to forget all this for awhilebut my off switch wasnt working all that well lately. I used to be able to turn my sadness off and go to work. Bella had messed up my switches. And I was both glad and angry about it. I am going to be a useless whore when I go back. How can I seduce a strange woman now? I dont even want to play student/teacher with Bella, how can I perform for strangers? I am so screwed when Victoria finds out about this. I almost felt compelled to tell Bella now about Victoria. Its not right her father helping us without him at least knowing. I dont want to remember it. But I never forget it. Bella would probably not be scared away by my story, but I would be putting her in such a great dangerher father, too. And what if he suspects Im involved in it somehow? It would be my word against Victoriasif I go to jail now, Katie will be screwed. Not to mention, I would be raped maybe twice a day there.

I would call Bellas father if I could be sure the phones werent being monitored by Victoria or one of her guys. Ill have to sneak away soon and talk to Charlie. He needs to know. It could be the way out for me. But if something goes wrong, Victoria could still have someone get to Katie and hurt her not to mention Ben and Angela. I had to think about this a little more. I trust Charlie, but even a good cop can be bound by the law without a lot of proof, theyd have to release Victoriaand then shed be coming back for meand everyone I love. Lets get out of here., I suggested, hitting the stop button on the recorder, Lets have some fun. Im supposed to entertain you, not have you crying all the time. She didnt argue with me but smiled and looked up as I stood on my feet, scanning all the possibilities. Finally, I decided on a great one. I havent done it for a long time and Im sure she would love it, too. She was dressed perfectly for my idea tonight. Thin, short sleeved shirt, jeans, sneakersshe may need to bring a light jacket, though. I snatched her away from her apartment and in no time, she was sitting on my lap on the train, asking me where I was taking her. Cant tell you., I just said, driving her insane, loving it. My hard on was poking her in the ass minutes into the train ride and I winced, wishing my dick would just take a vacation for once. Without a word, or obvious movements, Bellas ass began to grind lightly against my raging, restrained cock. I could only see the back of her head as she kept torturing me, getting her revenge for our first train ride, I was certain. The way I drove her into a frenzy and then just grabbed her hand and ran off the train at our stop. So slowly she moved her hips, rubbing my cock back and forth as I tried to repress a groan I really wanted to voice. I bet shes smiling right now, the little bitch! My evil side was fuming, suffering. And this train ride would be longat least 45 minutes. Shit. After a couple more minutes of her subtle torture, I growled low in my chest, Bella! She giggled, stopping. This didnt help either. Now I wanted her friction rubbing against the bulge in my jeans. I was aching without it. Think of something elseyea, thats a good idea. Katherine came to my mind suddenly, teaching me how to knead dough for freshly baked bread. No, Edward, dont punch it like that., she smiled, always patient with me, Take your hands like thisand fold it over and press down gentlyyou dont have to hurt it. I was an angry kid back then. It felt good to punch itKatherine understood meknowing my reasons for being so frustratedand gave me some better

things to do with my hands besides punch. God, I miss her. Maybe if things do get resolved with Carlisle and Esme, I can see her and Joseph again. That would be great. I felt relaxed and smiled, looking out the window of the train, the sun still shining but beginning to lower in the city sky. And Bella started rubbing her ass on my cock again. At first I laughed to myself and said, sorry, Bella, I killed Frankencock, you wont be playing with him during this tripbut then, like some horrible lab experiment gone wrong, Frankencock rose againhe would never truly die. DAMMIT!! Nooo, I breathed, hearing Bella let out a small, throaty laugh. She kept stopping and startingneedless to say, by the time we got to our stop I was hornier than a sailor at sea for the last seven yearsbut I couldnt make her get off my lap. It felt right having her there. I love how perfectly we fit together. When we got off the train, for a minute I had to walk a little hunched over, feeling like an eighty year old man as Bella laughed with glee at my predicament. Oh, Bellalaugh nowbut revenge is a dish best served cold. I was feeling lessengorged when we arrived at the dock, a bright yellow boat awaiting us, full of people, tourists mostly. The words New York Sunset Taxi were written in royal blue against the school bus yellow paint and Bella looked at me, raising a brow. Have you ever done this before?, I asked, seeming I was always asking her this question. No, what is this?, she asked as I paid the man on deck for our tickets. We were standing on deck when I filled her in. This is a sunset cruise, a three hour ride that shows us all over New York., I informed, hoping she liked boats and wasnt prone to sea sickness. Cool!, she looked around on board and saw lots of white lawn type chairs. You like boats?, I asked as she went and grabbed us two seats near the side of the boat, so we could see everything. Did I not tell you about Charlie and me fishing every summer of my life?, she looked at me as if to say, DUH. Oh, yea, sorry, I forgot about that for a second., I felt bad for not remembering that myself. Youre lucky youre so pretty., she teased me, and I laughed with her on that one. I didnt often hear that compliment from women. I remembered the first compliment she paid me, in the private room, Awaken, when she said, Your eyes are so green. Theyre pretty. I think I first loved her right then. Only Bella would notice my eyes at that moment in time.

I laid my head on her shoulder for a second before the boat started its engine and then kissed it, straightening back up and looking over the side, watching the water lapping at the side of the taxi. Bella took my hand and laced my fingers into hers and in minutes, the boat began to fire up and we began to move, both of us smiling like giant nerds at each other, excited to begin our journey. The sun was glorious and the breezes were cool and welcome as we left the dock and land behind us. I put on my sunglasses and I got a sexy smirk from Bella at that. She seemed not to prefer sunglasses so I didnt feel too bad that I had them and she didnt. She looked so cute squinting and holding her hands over her eyes so she could see better while our tour guide stepped up, standing on deck, near the back of the ship, microphone in hand, introducing himself. He was a tall, burly African American man with a bald head and mustache. He wore a white visor, turned backwards on his head, shorts, and a white t-shirt that said, I love New York. the word love represented with a red heart. I would not want to have to fight him but as soon as he spoke, I liked him. He was funnyand knew his stuff. We saw Battery Park City, the Empire State building, Center for the Performing ArtsMr. Lee was our guides name and he was great. Every once in awhile, hed try to interact with people and finally he was near us and yelled out, Everybody okay, here? Is everybody understanding me? Hardly anyone spoke up, except me, not very shy. YEA!!, I half turned to him, smiling, making Bella turn bright pink as she curled her arms around mine. Come on, people, one guy answers!!, he yelled, Not good, guys, come on, have some fun here!! Some people yelled out then, clapping and going WOOOOO!!!! Screw you guys, Ill talk to my bro, over here, he sat next to me in an empty chair beside me and smiled, Youre the only person who understands me, so, where you from, man? He put the microphone to me and I laughed for a second, saying, I live here. Aww, cool, loving your city, thats beautiful!, he slapped me on the back, And who is this fine little woman on your arm? This is Bella, shes mine., I joked, Dont be trying to steal my girl away, Mr. Lee. No, man, noits not like that, I promise., he smiled, and a few people laughed at our exchange, Youre a cool guy, whats your name? Edward., I answered. He extended his hand to me and I almost went to shake it but then he made his hand into a fist and punched my fist in friendship. Nice to have you on board, Edward., he said, standing up, Thanks.

Thank you., I smiled, hearing Bella giggling into my arm as he left us, going to interrogate some other passengers now. See?, Bella smiled at me, Mr. Lee loves you. You cant be all that bad. He has the hots for YOU., I grinned back at her, You fine little woman. As Mr. Lee traveled around the boat, he found people from Texas, the Ukraine, Canada, Japan. I smiled, liking the thought that at least on vacations, people could all get together and have fun. We passed the Staten Island Ferry and Mr. Lee told us that the one beautiful thing about it is, its free. And, he said, In life, you have to appreciate and take advantage of free things. The best things in life are free. Im glad my sunglasses were on. Im sure my eyes wouldve conveyed my thoughts in response to that and I didnt want to bring Bella down anymore. The next couple of days would have to be spent laughing and kissingand making love. Its all we have left. Im greedy for more memories with herhappy ones, not sad or worried ones. Finally, we were coming upon the Statue of Liberty and the sun was almost down. The most beautiful colors slashed across the skies behind the statuegolds, reds, purples, orangesand blackness above it all, slowly taking over and descending upon the colors of the dieing day. Twilight. For some reason this time of day always saddens me insideanother day without Katieor Tanyaanother night my daughter would go to bed without feeling my kiss goodnight. Another day I wasnt doing my job and being her father, just as Carlisle and Esme treated me. I hate myself. Today I was nearly punched in the face and I smiled, recalling that. Charlie is a good father, he loves Bella so much, thats why he got so angry with me. Im glad Bella has him. And he didnt abandon her, even with her terrible confessions today. Shes blessed to have a father like that. Im jealous. Today was good. I actually find myself hopingdreaming like a fool that Charlie will perform some miracle in the next two days and Ill never have to look at Victorias face or hear her voice againlet alone feeling her touch. And even if I do have to go back, I still feel good that I made some wonderful, true friends during this brief time out of Fire. I feel like I could face anything now, with no reservations and no regrets. Im sad to see today end. It was a great day, for the most part. The only thorn in it was that Bella suffered in it. Shes smiling now and watching the sky with me, standing up against the rails of the ship, in front of me, wrapped up in my arms, shielded from the oncoming night wind. We didnt talk, we didnt need to. I just laid my face against her hair and squeezed my arms around her hips as she leaned her head back on my chest, completely relaxed. The guide had finished his segment and now, all there was to do was watch as the beauty of the night was born before our eyes. I thought of Katiewondering what she was doing now. Wondering what she had for dinner tonight and what movie she was watching before bedtime. I thought of Katherine and Joseph, and pictured them doing the dishes together, as they sometimes did, just to hang out and talk to each other. She washed and he dried.

I usually was doing my homework at the table nearby while they quietly spoke and tried not to disturb me. And if I ever had any questions, I got the benefit of both of their intelligent mindsand the dishes always waited until I was back on track again. I even thought of my parentsand felt bad that I pictured them at their fancy Waldorf dinner table, eating in silence as usual. I wonder if theyre talking about me now. I wonder what theyre saying. And then Im afraid to wonder. Fire is already open nowand Emmett is workingJasper, too. Is it wrong that I feel a little homesick for them? They have been my family for years nowand that placeI had never loved it there but I did have some happy times thereI dont know what the hell Im doing. I felt like I belonged there a couple weeks agoI was okay with being therewasnt I? I didnt feel like a prisoner until Bella opened my eyes. Now that Ive seen what I really am, I hate it. How can I ever return to it now? How can I keep fucking strange women for payment now? The buildings all looked black now in the dark, the golden and orange lights sprinkled all over them. The water was dark and reflected the New York skyline like a mirror below it, the sky above a dark lavender array of clouds above it. New York looks so beautiful this way, doesnt it?, I thought aloud. Absolutely., Bella looked as hypnotized by it as I was. Bella?, I kept my eyes on the buildings and the skies above them. What, Edward? Im tired of being afraid all the time., I heard a strong voice rising up in me suddenly, not really aware of where it was coming from, but loving it nonetheless, Im tired of dreaming that someday Ill be locked in a cage and Victoria will stride up and casually tell me my daughter is dead because I didnt obey an order quite right. Im tired of thinking about leaving you. Im tired of being a whore. Im not doing it anymore. Im done with itall of it. Bella turned to me, as if she didnt believe I was the one speaking these words. Her eyes wore tears and she stared at me, stunned. Edward, whats come over you?, she asked in a breathy voice, Youre soyou seem so differentwhat are you saying? I need to see your father as soon as we dock, Bella., I said, my mind on a mission now, not willing to be deterred, Theres something else I need to tell him. Do you know where hes staying? Yes., she blinked, wondering why the sudden change in me. I wasnt quite sure myself, except, maybe, after all Bellas help and her father taking a chance and helping meand after what he said about my daughterI know hes right. If I keep dancing with the devil, I will burn and so will Katie. And it will be my fault. If I truly want her safe, I must completely disconnect from these peoplethis life. Ive cried sorry tears for myself for far too long now. Like Bella said, Im a father. I have to get up and join Bella and Charlie in this fight if I want to be freeand I do want it, more than ever. I cant lie back and be carried up this mountain. I must scrape my nails and get dirtyand climb out. Im done with telling people like Bella I cant be reached or saved.

Its been my own fault Im in this god damned hole. I have to take my head out of my ass and get myself out. My daughter wants me. She needs me. And I need her. Ive been without her for too fucking long. I want her back. I want my life back. And Im going to get it back even if it kills me. Id rather die than sit still any longer. I think these thoughts are old ones, things Ive known and told myself all along. But part of methat hurting, sad part of me was too broken to hear it. So, over the years, my strength did get buried. But now, I really believe, thanks to Bellas belief in me and Charlies wordsI think Ive scratched the surface of those feelingsI think Ive found my power againat last. When we docked, I was hurrying to the train, Bella beaming at me and running along with me, holding my hand as I got the number of the Waldorf thru information. Whatre you doing now?, she asked, spellbound by me. Calling my parents., I smiled at her, whispering, Watch this. Watch what youve done to me. When I got rung into my parents room, I amazed myself, even as Carlisle answered the phone. Hello?, he said with a small voice. I summoned up all my courage and made my voice hard. Carlisle, this is Edward Cullen., I said, making myself sound as formal as their fucking note to me, I cordially invite you and Mrs. Cullen back to Bellas house first thing in the morning - EARLY. Bring your account information. You owe my daughter a lot of money. Ill hear what you have to say but dont expect forgiveness or hugs or kisses, either. Thats all going to take a lot of time. And if youre serious about caring for me, youll do the time. I dont need you but my daughter might appreciate having her paternal grandparents visit from time to time. You owe her that, too. Bellas mouth fell open as she watched me smile at her, winking. Carlisle only stuttered and replied, Yes. Alright, Edward. Anything you want. Well be there. But why did you No questions., I frowned for real as I cut him off, Thats all I wanted to say. And I hung up the phone before he could utter another sound. I felt a huge smile explode across my face as Bellas lips did the same. She was clinging to my shirt and blinked a few more tears. Edward!!, she looked at me with a whole new expression, What the hell happened to you? Did I do something wrong?, I raised a brow, waiting. God, NO!, she threw her arms around me, trembling as I held her, too, That was fucking magnificent!! I didnt know you had it in you!! I should expose you to the sea air more often! Its not the sea air, Bella., I looked into her eyes, Its you. You brought me to this place. You helped me find ME again. Im done being the weakand Im done

being the victim poor, little, sad Edward. That wouldnt make Katie proud. That wont get me home to her again. I cant get mad at my parents for not being there when Im doing the same thing to Katie now. I need to get home to her. And that means changing myselfchanging my life. I have two more days. I cant waste them. God, Edward, I love you!, she kissed me hard and broke away, adding, I LOVE YOU THIS WAY!! Im only just beginning., I kissed her even harder as she squealed into my mouth, You aint seen nothing yet! The train finally opened and we were walking off, on our way to Charlies hotel. I had something big to confess and I hoped hed still want to help me out after Id made it. I think he will. He is a cop. Cops dont shy away from something as ugly as murder. Even if he doesnt help me, Ill still execute my escape some other way. But no matter what happens, I am now devoting myself to getting back to Katie and repairing our relationship while theres still time. Its not too late. But soon, it may be. So this is me, Edward Cullen, preparing my resignation letter to Victoria Spears. I quit, bitch. You dont own me anymore. You never did. And if you think youre gonna scare me into staying under your thumb, think again. Im gonna fuck you for a change. Im gonna bring you down if it takes me a year!

25 EPOV Victoria is not just a girl pimp or a club owner., I was saying in the dim light of Charlies hotel room as both he and Bella stared back at me, Shes insane. She kills. Charlie had been prepared to hear my story and was holding a pen and his notebook, but he didnt write. He kept looking at me and I didnt look away this time. I needed him to see I was telling the truth in my eyes. You saw her kill someone, Edward?, he asked, showing no reaction in his face. Yes., I swallowed, knowing I was going to have to tell the story. Emmett was the only other person I had ever told. And that was after it happenedI hadnt spoken of it since thenbut it was never out of my mind. Im not sure exactly why she did it., I began, Maybe he saw something he shouldnt have seen, or he was given to her by one of her family to dispose ofI dont know that part of it. But I can tell you what I saw. Charlie gave a nod and was writing something but I guessed that he was ready for me to proceed. It was shortly after I had come to belong to Victoria. After the whole blood ritual thing, I said, trying to go back to that night in my mind so I wouldnt forget a single detail.as I told the story out loud. I was still not trusted to be free around the club at that point. Victoria didnt fully have me in my slave mindset yet. I was mouthy, I argued with her at times, I

wanted the freedom to be able to visit my daughter from time to time, and Tanyas grave, which wasnt allowed. I never tried to get away, but I was still in training. I was sitting in the dungeon below Fire, in my cage, that was just like the vampire cage above I would someday work in. Naked, as usual, I wasnt hurt or scarred that night, just hungry. I was waiting for Victoria, hoping shed bring me something to eat. That day had been all about learning my positions, what commands she would speak to make me do those positions, and how to speak to her with the right tone of respectand how to restrain myself from speaking or even shouting out in pain until I was given permission to do so. Mentally, I was drained and I had not eaten all day. She said I had not earned it yet. I had been alone in the brightly lit room for about two hours when I heard her coming back. Only, she wasnt alone. I heard a mans muffled, pleading voice coming before I saw either of them, but the voice was very terrified and very distressed. Victoria dragged this teenage boy in, he couldve been about 18 or 19 years old. He was handsome, golden blonde hair and tan skin, he looked like a typical California type boy. He was naked and wore a leash and collar around his neck, and his wrists were handcuffed behind him. He came in on his knees, half dragged in by Victoria, and his face was wet with tears, his body a little wet with perspiration. He didnt look hurt or bleeding anywhere, but something had him shaking and almost sobbing as they silently eyed me in my own little prison. For a horrible moment, I thought she was going to make me suck this boys cock or make me fuck himor have him fuck me, against both our willsI hate now to think that my first thought was for myself back then, but I was not used to the pain in the beginning, I still did not have her vow that I didnt have to perform with men yet. I was not totally broken at that point. But that was soon to change. I had almost spoken to her, but remembered my hours of training that day and didnt speak until I was allowed to do so. Kneel., Victoria demanded me as I sat on my bare ass in the cage. I wordlessly rose up and knelt, making sure I was straight and placed my hands behind my back as she taught me, holding my head up, eyes downward. Very good boy., Victoria gave me a shred of praise after a long day. The boy bound and gagged with lots of silver duct tape wrapped around his entire head, several times around, looked at me with a desperationhis breath short and panting as he tried to somehow communicate to me with his eyes. One eye was ice bluethe other eye was green. I want your eyes on him., Victoria informed me and I let my eyes raise all the way up to see the entire view of the kid. You might have the impression that Im weak because Im a woman, Edward., she said to me, a little smirk on her painted lips, You let me pay your debt and now you want to give me a hard time. You think you have a say in your life now. And you are resisting me and my training. Not completelybut I can see the look

in your eyes when I give you an order, the frowns when I lock you into your cage. Its time you learned whos boss. And see what horrible things can happen if you dont please me and obey me as youre supposed to. I came back to the present now, looking at Bella and then at Charlie as I took a breath, not wanting to relive every little detail of that night, but knowing I had to finally do what was right. Right is always hard. She took hours., I looked at Charlie, afraid what Bellas eyes would show if I looked there, It seemed like hours, to me. She tortured the kid. I dont mean whipped tortured. She started with his fingers and a pair of meat scissors. Without saying a thing to the kid, she began chopping off his fingertips, saying she had to remove anything that could reveal his identity, if they found his body. Later, she took his teeth, too. She ate his fingertipswhile he watchedand his screams were I shuddered and in seconds, Bella was sitting next to me, holding her arm around me and holding my hand in hers. Charlie didnt object to this, he was taking notes, wearing a cold look on his face. She enjoyed it., I informed, Thats what scared me the most, besides the god damned images I can never forget. She played with him and taunted him as she killed him. And she took her time. I kept dry heaving and gagging, if I had anything in my stomach I wouldve been throwing up the entire time. I begged her, screamed and cried to her to stop itthen later, when the poor kid was just chopped up everywhere and still alive, I begged her to end it. Put the kid out of his misery, at least. All she said to me was, watch and learn, Edward. Watch and learn. At one point, she almost made me eat one of the fingertips, when my stomach growled on the fourth finger she detached. I reacted so badly, she didnt force me to, thank God. , I continued, She called me weak and said I needed to see this, even if it was just onceso Id know my place. She told me this could happen to me, my daughter, my parentsanyone I had any ties to. I couldnt say anything at that point, I was so repulsed and sick by the end of itI just cried. I was broken then. I would agree to anything she wanted after that. She seemed to get off on having me watch her and the suffering we both were doing, me and the kid. She even took her clothes off near the end of it. Even after it looked like the kid died she kept carving him up. Every time I tried to look away, shed scream at me to watch or Id lose my eyes, too. She wrapped the parts in plastic and put them into a big plastic tote box. I said, cutting past all the gore and giving the details, She unlocked my cage and forced me to stand in the bloody mess on all fours. I was shaking like a leaf and crying but she didnt care. She said she wanted to see if I learned my lesson about resisting and complaining. She painted bloody lines down my nose and on my cheeks, wrote slut on my foreheadbitch across my backshe was laughing and playing while she decorated me with this poor kids blood. I thought Id nearly lose my mind, trying to hold still while she did that. She made me lick some of the blood off the floor. She said it would make me a good pet. She said it gives strength. She licked some of it, too. Shes a complete psycho. I knew it that night. Later, I suspected her family uses her or her club to hide it when they want to kill people or dispose of them. People who get in their way or could maybe be a witness to something theyve done. I never even knew the kids name. Did you ever see her kill anyone else besides him?, Charlie asked, taking more notes.

No., I answered, After that, I did anything she said to keep her away from my daughter. She never had to show me that again. This was years ago., Charlie thought aloud to himself, Did you bury the body? No, she had someone else take it away., I replied, I dont know if they buried itor burned itor what. No body, no proof., Charlie frowned a little. There is proof., I said, hoping this wasnt a mistake. They both looked at me and I took a breath. Victoria made me clean the floor that nightand to use the hose to wash myself. She was very careful to collect the bloody towels. But I found a rag while she was gone and I was cleaning. I wet that rag with some of the blood. And I hid it in the dungeon. Oh my God., Bella let out a breath now, With that, shed go to prison for murder. Edward could testify against her. Hold on, Bella., Charlie shot her a look and even I knew it wouldnt be that simple. Charlie looked at me and asked, Are you sure its still there? I cant be 100% sure., I admitted, I havent been there for the last two weeks. It was there before I left, I know that. I have to clean the equipment there and I did before I came to Bellas. I checkedit was there. Why didnt you tell anyone this before?, Charlie asked. I dont know if I can trust any police in this town, with Victorias family what they are. I said, I didnt want to risk my daughter. I was afraid for a long time, then, laterI didnt trust anyone enough to tell them. Not even Emmett knows I have that. At the time I did it, I hoped, maybe one day, Id have the guts to show it to someone. I didnt want the kid to have died like that and not have there be anything to prove hed been there. All the pain he went through They didnt say anything. I trust you, Charlie., I stated, looking right into his eyes, Ill give it to you. The only thing isI have to get it first. Charlie looked into my face and knew what I was sayingand thinking. Youre willing to do that, Edward?, Charlie asked gravely. Yes., I said, determined, I am. Wait. What?!, Bella interjected now, clearly upset by what she figured out we were talking about. I looked at her and said, I have to go back. For awhile. After a few days, Ill be able to walk around freely again. Victoria goes home, leaves the club for hours all the time, leaving me there alone. As soon as I get that one shot at getting that rag, I can get out of there. Emmett and I are the only other two who she lets have the key to get in the dungeon. I can go back on Monday, and if I act very nice, maybe by the weekend I can get her to release me.

No!, Bella shouted at me, tears shining in her eyes as Charlie watched on with sadness, NO! Dad, tell him he cant do that! Edward, youre not going back there! Bella, listen to me., I took both her hands, looking her squarely in the eyes, Victoria trusts me. I can get in there without raising any suspicion. I live there. This is perfect. Shed never guess what Im trying to do. She thinks Im scared of her, still. I can act afraid of her. Im a good actor at this shit. No, its too dangerous., she argued, Dad, you can go to the police and have them get a search warrant or something! Charlie sighed and shook his head. NYPD wont issue a search warrant without other proof that there was a murder there., Charlie said, They wont care about Edwards story, because hes a who-- Bella and I both looked at Charlie as he stopped himself and looked at us apologetically. Sorry., he said and finished his sentence, Police wont listen to Edwards story because hes a prostitute. Theyll think hes just trying to hurt his pimp for some personal reason. Besides, like Edward said, we dont know the good cops from the bad cops in this city. Hes right. Shell never trust an undercover cop going in there and it could take months for them to earn her trust. If we have a shot at this, Edward will have to kind of go in, gain her trust enough to get the evidenceand then run like Hell once he finds it. If we do it any other way, we risk his daughter getting hurt, not to mention ourselves. When does she expect you back?, Charlie asked me, taking notes again. Dawn, Monday morning., I answered and heard Bellas breathing quicken, her hands clutching at her hair and then around her eyes. I tried to comfort her, whispering, shhhh, and holding her to me, kissing her fingers as Charlies eyes concentrated on his notebook. I hate this., she yelled, I fucking hate this. Itll only be a few days., I said to her, assuring her, I know her, I know her habits, her routines. Im the best person to do this. No one else can get into the dungeon of that club except me. Hell, for the first couple days, Ill be in the dungeon 24/7! Shes going to hurt you, Edward., Bella shouted at me. A little., I admitted, But with Victoria, its mostly humiliation for me. She wants me to heal and look pretty body-wise so I can start working again. Believe it or not, the clients do most of the hurting on me. She is pretty soft on me. I guess because I dont usually give her any trouble. And if I come back acting super sweet to her, she might forget about the night you attacked her and forgive me faster. I know shed demented, but, in her own twisted way, she acts like she loves meIm her lapdog. She only gets cruel when she thinks Im disobeying her in some way. I cant hide a bug on you., Charlie said, I assume youre naked there most of the time. I gave a little nod at Charlie, embarrassed to admit that to him of all people.

You can sneak a bug in under your tongue. Once youre in the dungeon, and not being watched, you can place it somewhere so we can hear whats going on. And I can inject you with a locator chip., Charlie thought aloud, That way we know where you are at all times. Alright., I agreed. I hated the idea of them listening to everything I would have to say to Victoria and endure when I got back there. Would Bella be hearing this, too? I just pictured Charlie and Bella together in his car, listening to me being punished and I wanted to die. I cant let her hear that. I didnt even like just Charlie hearing it, either. We have a little time that I can get those things and iron out some other plans for Monday., Charlie was writing furiously, I wont need the NYPD, I can do this myself. Bella was just listening, shaking and trying to be tough like her Dad. I knew wed be having a long talk later back at her place. First I want to ask you some questions, though, Edward., Charlie turned a page and gave me a stern look. Okay., I waited. Did you participate in this murder or any other, even if you were ordered or forced to do so?, he asked, totally a cop right now. No., I said right away, hoping he didnt suspect me. Have you helped lure or kidnap anyone into Victorias place?, he asked further. Bella looked up at me and her father, a shocked glare in her eyes as I responded. No, never., I shook my head a couple times. Have you ever disposed of or helped hide any body at all? No, Charlie., I said, I just cleaned the blood off the floor with that one kid, I swear. After a long, hard stare at me, Charlie said, I believe you, Edward. Im glad. Id hate to send you to prison, too, after all this is over. Bella would never let me hear the end of it. Was he joking or serious? I couldnt tell. Charlies face is very hard to read. Just like his daughters sometimes. Im just her slave a sexual thing to her. Like a peta dog., I informed, She wouldnt have me do anything like that. There are others who do those things for her. Men I never get to see. Why didnt you tell me any of this before?, Bellas voice raised a little at me, All the therapy we hadyou never said she killed anyone. You said she was a friend! I cared about you, Bella. I liked you., I said, But I didnt really know you that well. You were a client in the beginning. I didnt trust you completely. I didnt know what youd do. If you called the police, youd get us all killed. I didnt want to watch YOU get chopped up!

She looked at Charlie and he frowned at both of us. When Victoria pulled that knife on you in the club, I nearly had a heart attack., I confessed, I told Victoria that if she tried to hurt you, Id have to stop her. Thats why she wants to punish me when I go back. I defied her. She sees I care for you. She wouldnt kill you, though, in a roomful of witnesses. And she really doesnt want to kill the daughter of a police chief. But she can kill in other ways. She can make it all look like an accident. One thats not even remotely related to her. Bella let out a sob now and was clearly crying as she grabbed my shirt and looked up at me. What if she finds out what youre doing?, she wept, What if she catches you? Shell kill you like that boy! Charlie muttered right away that he would never let that happen, and at the same time, I was speaking to her, too. I wont let her catch me., I promised, Bella, I want to do this. I dont want to be a coward anymore. I want my daughter. I want you. This is the only way I can think of to finally get away from her. Charlie was giving me the look now, after I said I wanted Bella. A look that said dont even think about it. He may be helping me with Victoria, but that didnt mean we had his blessing as a couple. What about her family?, she asked, You said they have your blood in case you try to run away. They could still do something to hurt you after shes in jail. Maybe I can find it while Im there, too. But I doubt they care about me., I tried to convince her of this, Im just her pet. If she goes away for murder, theyll probably get mad at her for being so sloppy and letting herself get caught. They wont want anything to do with her. Theyll just be glad their own games are still going. Theyll turn their back on her and let her rot. At least, thats the way it worked in Goodfellas. Bella looked at me in shock, wondering if I was really going to entrust my life and future to a movie. She might give her family up to lessen her own sentence., Charlie agreed, Theyd probably put her in a witness relocation program after her sentence was served. Maybe well get lucky and theyll hit her while shes in jail. Charlie sounded so serious. Hoping that someone would kill Victoria Maybe Emmett can keep an eye on you for us, too., Bella said, If anything goes wrong, he can call me. Or I can call him. I hate to involve him in this, Bella., I sighed, rubbing the bridge of my nose with my thumb and finger, Arent enough of us in danger if something goes wrong? Besides, we have the bug. Wow, this is just like Burn Notice. Ive never felt so alive. I like the way it feels, plotting Victorias downfall, with me as the quarterback. Charlie asked me a bunch of other questions, like the layout of the club, doors and exits, locked doors and open doors. I could tell he was doing everything in his power to ensure my safety, in case something did go horribly wrong. Its possible. I promised to do my best and to be very careful.

Then, Charlie had me describe the boys face to himand to my amazement, Charlie was sketching the face as I tried to give more detail. Even Bella was amazed, not aware he could do this and draw so well. Charlie gave a little smile, unable to hide the fact that he was proud of himself for impressing us further with his skills. In awhile, I was looking at a great drawing of the kids face I had seen that night. Charlie said he could fax the sketch to Forks and have his men do a search on it for missing people in the New York area and see if anything came up. I again warned Charlie about going to the club and poking around there, but he just smirked at me and said this wasnt his first day on the job. He could get information without going near the club or the police departments here. He never said how he was going to do it, only for me to do my part and let him do his job. On the way home, Bella just kept giving me the look. She almost tried to talk me out of this plan, but I kindly told her that my mind was already made up. Charlie had given me a different look as we left his hotel earlier. I may have imagined it, but I couldve sworn I saw respect in his eyes. I couldnt and wouldnt change my mind. On Monday, Id have to go back to her anyway. At least this way, I had a plan of escape and backup. Even Charlie agreed this was the best way to go. Dangerous, yesbut what isnt dangerous in my world at this point? I tried to change the subject. My parents will be coming over tomorrow., I reminded, my arms around her, I dont know what theyre going to say, but I have to be ready for anything. I want to shut my feelings offbut I dont know if I can do that anymore. I dont want to care, but I do. I cant let them see theyre hurting me. I have to be like stone. Thats not the answer, Edward., Bella said, looking up at me, softening a bit now that we werent talking about Victoria, Its okay to show that you hurtand care. But you cant let it take you over. You cant let it break you. Dont make the mistake now, because youve found your strength, that you have to be made of steel all the time now. Be strong. And tender. You can be both. Dont lose your vulnerable side, your heart. I love your heart so much, its so full and sweet. Balance, Edward. Everything right in life is balanced. Dont become cruel just because you can now. I had to smile at her. How does she always know the exact right thing to say? Yes, Bella., I used my good pet reply, knowing that would drive her crazy. Shut up with that., she tapped my arm, Youre no toy anymore. Not even an educational toy?, I smiled more, trying to lean in and get her lips. No., she pouted a little. How about an action figure?, I kept playing, making another unsuccessful try at her mouth as she yanked away. That remains to be seen., she turned her back to me, crossing her arms. I pouted and snuck my face down until my lips were right behind her ear, Id be happy to be your favorite dolllaying on your bedwaiting for you to come and hold mea big stupid smile sewn across my face.

She spun around and held me tight, breathing her hot breath into my neck, tickling it a little as I inhaled strawberry in her hair, unable to suppress my big, goofy smile just being allowed to have contact with her again after a long while. Later, back at her apartment, I held my favorite and only nightshirt and smiled, remembering the first night Bella put it on me as I felt so confused, wondering if she was tired of having sex with me already. I really didnt know what she was up to that night. Now I do. She turned me into a man, when once I was a shadow. How do you thank someone for such a miracle? Bella?, I smiled over at her as she came into the bedroom, wearing her pajamas, a t-shirt and cotton shorts. Did you forget how to dress yourself again?, she smiled. I didnt forget., I half-frowned, I was just remembering when you gave me this. She smiled more and kissed my lips softly, making the hair on my arms stand up on end. I held it up to her and asked, Can you put it on me again? Im glad cute Edward is still around., she took the shirt and put the collar of it over my head, repeating her past words, not exactly the same, but enough. I know I made up rule number one., she said softly, But I hope you knowyoure more than just perfect pecks and washboard abs to me. Then, she broke out of that speech to add more, as she helped the sleeves over my arms. I love you Edward., her voice nearly cracked as she looked at my face, I know I should be brave, but I am so scared. If anything happens to you, I dont know if I can. She let a little sob erupt from her mouth and I cupped her little face in both my hands, making her look up at me. Nothing is going to happen., I vowed, wishing my intense stare would make her believe it, Except Victoria going to prison. And when every things over, Ill be back for you. Nothing will stop me from coming back to you. I wont let it. I wont rest until youre safe again. One last time, Ill have to pretend to be her slave. I do it for youand Katie. Finally, Ill be doing it for a good reason. Bella, you are my strength now. You are my life now. You once told me to do what I wanted and not ask permission, not to ask if its alright all the time. I have to do that now. I hate that I have to go against YOU the very first time I try this, but you taught me that. Pleasejust believe in me. Trust me. I will be back. God, I sound like Arnold Schwarzzeneger. She laughed and kissed me and I felt my eyes close, loving her touch so badly. Every time she kissed me or touched me, it felt better than the last time. I believe in you, Edward., she whispered as she held me, And I trust you. I will be here, waiting for you when you come back. I love you, Bella., I covered her mouth with kisses now as I spoke to her, God damn it, I love you.

Shut up and do me already., she commanded, biting into my neck and sucking my skin hard into her mouth. I almost laughed, thinking maybe we had learned a little too much from each other. I was the lovesick little girl now and she was the hungry, seductive tigress. Yes, Bella., I joked, feeling her pull me down onto the bed. (* This is for all the girls at ff and who requested this scene. Love ya!*) I would like to introduce you to my favorite number., Bella breathed, Sixtynine. Oh my God, the Bride of Frankencock has arisen again! Andthere he goesDr. Frankencock is up now, too. Youve done this before?, I smiled, surprised at my innocent little Bella. Oh, who are we kidding? Shes not that innocent anymore. But thats okay. I love sexy, horny Bella. Ugh, stop asking me that all the time and get to work., she was untying the knot in my pants, and shoving them down, exposing my ass to the incoming, cool May breezes from the window. Get to work?, I feigned aggression and shoved her down, roughly yanking her clothes off her as she gave off little whimpers. I kicked my pants off and turned her around, picking her up in my arms, upside down, my hands locked securely together around the base of her spine as she dangled upside down, her hair hiding her face as I stood, taking two steps back from the bed. She let out a little scream and her bent legs were on both sides of my head, and before she could say another word, my tongue was circling furiously inside her. If she wants 69, Ill give her 69. But it wont be all easy and fun for her. Try sucking my cock dangling upside down, Dr. Bella. Get to work., I ordered her, taking a firm bite inside her as she screeched out, her hands holding my back for support, quickly traveling downward and digging her fingers into my ass. She tried to locate my cock and I almost laughed as she tried to deal with her current position. Now, Bella, or I might just drop you., I vocally pushed her to take me into her mouth, smiling to myself at how evil I could be when properly inspired. With a little throaty breath, she found me at last and I felt a hot, wet, tight mouth enclose around me. Let me introduce you to MY favorite number., I corrected and plunged my tongue deep into her throbbing little pussy lips, hearing her give a muffled cry as she worked her head back and forth over my penis, quickly getting the swing of it nowa fast learner. Ill bet she never did 69 this way before. I was devouring hertasting her juices and wanting more and moreit wasnt long before I was ravaging every inch of the tender flesh before me. At the same time, I was growling and trying to keep in control while Bella delivered perhaps the best blow job I had ever experienced. I guess being upside down works for her. It definitely works for me.

Her tongue kept wrapping around my head and tensing around my shaft and then shed release me just when I couldnt take it anymore and lap up the sides and move her tight mouth up and down over me completely, the wetness sloppy and thickand un-fucking-believeable!! Her sucking sounds pushed me even closer to the edge as I threw myself completely into giving her the best licking of her life in return. I even walked us into the living room so I could maybe hold out a little longer before I camebut that didnt help so I walked us back into the bedroom again. This seemed to thrill and scare Bella at the same time and her screams of desire just increased more when I moved around a little. My dirty little girlmy upside down love whore. Is there nothing she wouldnt let me do to her? Would I never hear the words lo mein from Bellas lips? God, I love her. She was coming nowscreaming and tensing around my tongue. I gave it an extra little wiggle at the tip of it and that made her howl out like a coyote. I couldnt hold my orgasm much longer and almost instantly with her, I announced to Bella I was going to cumand then I explodedhoping she was alright with swallowing me upside down. I laid her down on her back then, on her bed, in case she was having difficulty swallowing me. She seemed alright. No choking or coughing going on. I wouldnt say it, but I was so proud of her. This is not the little girl who wouldnt even look at my penis that first night. What a beautiful goddess. I was glad that I had a part in waking this one for the first time. I knew I wanted Bella all for myselfand that I would fight for her so she could be in my life after I freed myself from Victoriabut a small, little piece of me wondered thought that there might be other men enjoying her somedayexperiencing all the beautiful and unspoken things that were Bella Swan. And I was jealous of them. I didnt want to share her. I was staring down at her face, that was laying on the bed right below my sated, soft cock. Oh my God., Bella sighed, looking up at me with a big smile on her face. Thought wed be laying on the bed, did we, Miss Get to Work?, I chuckled, slowly moving my finger from the tip of her cute little noseup towards her forehead. I didnt even think of doing it that way., she marveled at me like I was David Copperfield, That wasoh my God! I agree., I got down on my knees closer to her, kissing her lips upside down, tasting her tonguemy fingers playing in her long raven tresses. We kissed and made out for a long time. My hands couldnt get enough of her perky, full breasts and I enjoyed pinching her nipples and hearing her react to the delightful little pains she experienced as she licked my nipples and kissed and bit anything she could reach on my chest. Again., I finally growled, crawling on top of her body, kissing my lips down her torso, moving towards my delicious destination.

I held my body off hers with my hands against the mattress as she moaned, finding my very hard cock again and licking it good this time before taking him into her lips. I gave a hard groan, feeling how extra sensitive Frankencock was right now as I began to take small, little licks of the musky folds of flesh below me, teasing her as she teased me simultaneously. I blew cool air onto her wet little pink clit, hearing her give a low scream of pleasured torment. I couldnt help but smile like a fiend at that. I put my top lip to her clit and breathed out hot airand closed my lips together after heating the quivering little bud. She forgot my cock altogether for a second or two, bellowing out her cries from under my body. We were both going to cum fast this roundand I think we both knew it.

BPOV Today is Saturday, Day 13 I didnt want to wake up this early, but Edward had ordered his parents to make sure to get here as soon as they could. I asked him why and he said it would do them some good, waking up early, setting their alarm clock, having to bend to his schedule for a change. We had a quick, small breakfast of toast and milk and I wondered if I should make his parents something to eat and he scoffed and forbid me to fix them anything. They never cooked a meal for me., he said, his cold, stern mask in place as he got dressed. I couldnt blame him for feeling this way, and Id rather have him strong and cool than weeping and weak when they came to see himbut I didnt like seeing him act cruel. I wanted to say something, but I wasnt sure how to express it to him. My inner Dr. Bella told me it was right for him to show his anger. I had taught him to unbottle itand he was now. I should just let him react any way he wanted to and be there to help him through it all. In my dream, when my parents came to see me, Edward said as we got dressed, I got all dolled up, kept changing clothes, and when they came in, I was paralyzed with fear, frozen, up against the wall, staring out the window. He scowled at the memory of himself and shook his head, putting on his regular jeans and a comfortable gray t-shirt that hugged his curves very nicely. Im not doing that this time., he muttered, almost to himself, Im running this meeting. Alright, Edward. I was almost afraid of him suddenly, I wont interfere. No, Bella, Im not talking about YOU., his smile was back suddenly and his hard exterior vanished. I felt so relieved. He came to me and took my hands and kissed my knuckles, Without you, Id have never had the guts to see them at all. Remember when we met, I said Id rather be stuck with needles than talk to them?

Yes., I peeked up at him from under my lashes. Well, I still feel the same way., he admitted, But I wont let them push me around. I will finally say the thingsIve never been able to say before. Im so proud of you, Edward., I beamed back at him, Look at you now. Its still a little hard for meacting this way, he said, his vulnerable eyes shining back into mine, But I like it. It feels right. And I love the way you look at me when Imlike this. I feel like a man. I havent felt that wayin a very long time. I held him close and felt his lips on my temple when a knock tapped on the door. Edward tensed a bit and I looked up into his face, silently saying goodbye to his soft green eyeswatching stern, calm, darker green eyes emerge in their place. Its time., he breathed, taking a deeper breath. His hand squeezed mine and he kissed it again, letting go and moving on his own to the doora lions walk. He snatched the door open quickly and startled the handsome couple on the other side of the threshold. I couldnt see his expression very well but his voice spoke volumeshe only said, Inside. He pushed the door open and allowed them to come in. Already they looked flustered and uncomfortable, although right out of the pages of GQ and Vogue. Stylish clothes, perfect faces, perfect hair, perfect makeupI felt underdressed when they came in and gave me a nervous grin. The door slammed behind them and the woman, his mother, gasped and her head spun behind her towards her son. Before you sit down, his voice was ice, and so were his eyes as he looked at them, We have some business to take care of first. You brought your checkbook and account information I hope. Yes., Carlisle looked confusedly at his son as Edward crossed his arms, like a mighty King looking at a peasant. Write a check to Bella Swan for forty thousand dollars., Edward demanded with no emotion. I felt my mouth fall open but Edward gave me a look that meant dont say a word. And even more shocking, his father was DOING it! Without even asking why or what it was for. It must be nice to be rich. Although, it didnt look like it made any of the Cullens very happy. Carlisle tore the check out of his book and handed it to Edward, not saying a thing. Edward handed it to me and smiled a bit, saying to his parents, That was for two weeks of excellent therapy, which you caused me to need in the first place. You got off cheap. Shes worth so much more. Sit. Without thinking about it, I began to hurry over and sit down before Edward got angry with mewhen I saw his eyes I felt better. He smirked at me, silently assuring me I was not the one he was barking orders to. Before I could focus, Carlisle and Esme Cullen were sitting next to me on the sofa and Edward took his seat in the chair across them, the picture of confidance, dark green eyesanger. But controlled and chilly in his demeanor.

Dont put your checkbook away just yet, Carlisle., Edward said to his father, Now a little test for you. Write a check to your granddaughter. A check for all the surgeries shes going to need in the next ten years of her life. Youre a doctor, surely you know the prices. I want to see how much you really do care. I want to see if your heart is really as huge as your bank account. Write. This Edward is brilliantbut also very scary. Im glad hes on my side. Carlisle sighed and began to write. If you sigh again, Edwards cold eyes pierced into his father, Ill break your jaw. If you feel Im bothering you or causing you a little discomfort, then imagine how your granddaughter has felt all these years, let alone me. You have no idea what pain weve all been through. You dont have the fucking right or privilege to DARE sigh. Write the check. Esme shot Carlisle a look of stern reproach as Carlisle silently went back to writing the check. I didnt dare try to peek but then Carlisle tore it out and handed it to his son. I almost couldnt breathe as Edward looked at it, not showing any reaction in his expression. That will take care of hospital bills, surgeries, medicine.and college, too., Carlisle spoke very softly, And alsofor anything else she may need clothes, a car You pass., Edward gave it a single fold in half and tucked it into his t-shirt pocket, You came here to say something to me. Say it. Oh my Lord, Edward was impressing the Hell out of me. He was even making eye contact with his father now. I know I shouldve felt glad about getting my money back plus twenty thousand more, and Katies needs were going to be met, finally, by the Cullens. I wanted to get up and dancebut all that faded into the background of Edwards new strength and courage. I want to kiss him so badly. You may still break my jaw after we talk, but, Im prepared for that., Carlisle put his checkbook on the coffee table. First of all, you should know, Carlisle began, looking at his folded hands, Im not your biological father. At this, we all looked at Esme Cullen. She straightened a bit and cleared her throat. Edward, she could hardly make eye contact with her son now, When your father and I got married, we wanted a lot of children. We were very much in love and your father was already a doctor, working in the ER. For years, we tried to have a baby but it wasnt working. Your father did a test of both himself and meand we found out that I was finebut Carlislecould not have children. He claims he never knew this before we married. That last sentence had a lot of tension in it and it did not go unnoticed by Carlisle. I didnt know, Esme, for the millionth time!, Carlisle sneered, then tried to soften his tone and glare. Anyway, Esme continued, Carlisle suggested other options. But I didnt want some other mans baby, I wanted his. After a long time, I figured I just had to accept it. That we wouldnt have our own natural children together. I began to think about adoptionbut that depressed me too. I dont know why. I was young

and stupidselfish, wanting everything perfect and my way. I see now how senseless my attitude was. I shouldve justbeen more flexiblemore open to the other possibilities. She cleared her throat and looked at Edward. But his eyes were looking back at her with a fierce gaze that even spooked me, sitting beside her. Esme took a deep breath and went on. We were having a party one night, at our house. Some retirement thing for a doctor Carlisle worked with. I was so depressed that whole day. I had been working with the children at the hospital that afternoon, I volunteered there from time to time. I loved it. Somehow, it made me feel better, being around them, taking care of them. I wasnt a nurse but I could get them a pillow, help them eat their food, play board games with them, read them stories. I was not in the mood that night for a big party, playing hostess to over 100 people. But I played the part of the dutiful doctors wife, pretending to be happy and refined, charming every one of them. This reminds me of Edwards acting while he is servicing the women at Fire. Hmm. Interesting. I was more drunk than I care to admit., Esme looked at her fingernails, sighing, I had been drinking a lot since I found out thered be no children for us. I was already an alcoholic. But I was never drunk around the children. That much I made sure of. I went to one of the bedrooms upstairs to lay down., Esme said, It was dark and I was so dizzy and tired. I dont know how much time had passed, butthere was a man in the room with me all of a suddenhe was on the bed with mehe was kissing me andstarted to take off my clothes. Edward looked at her, his face unchanged. Carlisle was staring at his wedding ring, then his shoes, this obviously bothered him a great deal but he didnt want to show it. Then it seemed to me that Edwards cold stare was exactly like Carlisles. Is he imitating his father now? At first,, Esme bravely spoke again, I didnt stop him. I didnt know if it was a dream or reality. The room was dark but I could see parts of his face now and then, somehow. I could see he was very handsomeand he smelled so good. Andhis kiss was wonderful. I was letting him touch me and I was nearly naked when Carlisles face came to my mind. And just like that, I knew it was no dream. It was real. And he was unzipping his pants. I started to try to get up then, Esme said, her fists clenched as she remembered, I said NO and I tried to push him off me. I fought back, I did! But he was so strongand rough then. He put his hand over my mouth andhetook me. I told Carlisle what happened., Esme glanced over to her husband with a deadly eye, But he cared more about accusing any of his precious doctor associates than getting the man who raped me. Carlisles carefully folded hands clenched now and he jerked his head up at Esme. Thats NOT what I was thinking ABOUT!, Carlisle tried to keep his voice civil through his gritted, white teeth, You were BOMBED!! You couldnt even tell me what the man LOOKED like! Only that he was handsome and a great kisser!! I

couldnt call the police! Id have been a laughingstock and God knows what wouldve happened to my career, my reputation, if I went around accusing anyone with only the tale of my depressed, drunk wife as proof! Our lawyer told you, we didnt have a leg to stand on! And you said yourself, you let him undress and kiss youthere was no way to send someone to jail for rape! You let him have you. You didnt fight him off. Why cant you just admit the truth? You cheated on me. I DID NOT!!, she screamed, tears in her eyes. Carlisle didnt speak again. Edward looked at Carlisle and I thought I saw a pang of disgust there for a minute. But Edward still said nothing and just watched them. Shut up, Carlisle., Esme sniffed, This is my story, not yours. Carlisle stopped talking and Esme said, You see the support I got from my loving husband. So I tried to forget it ever happened. But I kept drinking. Carlisle was gone all the time, working nights in the ER. I was so afraid, sleeping alone every night after what had happened. I kept dreaming hed come back. I was losing my mind. I sunk deeper and deeper into alcohol. A couple months later, I found out I was pregnant. Carlisle said that no one knew he couldnt have children. We would just say it was our child. That it would be alright. I had wanted so badly to have a child. EdwardIm sorry, but at the timeI didnt want to have you. I didnt want that mans child. I was afraid of himI hated him. He attacked me. I didnt want to have the baby. But Carlisle said I couldnt have an abortion. He wouldnt allow it. He said it was murder. It wouldve killed you inside to do that, Esme., Carlisle closed his eyes and sneered the words, You wanted a baby so muchand you got your wish. You wouldnt have been able to live with yourself if you killed Edward. I took you to therapy. I tried to get you some help. Dont make me out to be the villain here. Therapy, out of town., Esme scoffed, Not with any decent doctors that might have known him or any of his fellow doctor friends. Social workers you took me to. Rehab. Mental institutions. You drank all the TIME!, Carlisle shouted, Its a miracle Edward was born healthy with the crap you kept pouring down your throat. Maybe you shouldve helped me instead of shipping me out from place to place, like a prisoner, until I was a good, clean little girl ready to come home and play house for you!, Esme defended. Can you please calm down?, Carlisle asked her, Youre talking to your son and his friend. Have a little dignity, please. Shut up., Edward said suddenly, still calm and bold as a mountain, glaring at Carlisle. What?, Carlisle looked stunned. I said shut up., Edward frowned at his father, Let her say whatever she has to say. Stop telling her what to do all the time. Youve always ordered her around. Its not going to happen to her here. She can say what she likes and any way she wants to say it. And when I let you, youll have your say. But for now, shut up. Fine., Carlisle looked frustrated and angry but he closed his mouth then. Thank you., Esme said to Edward.

Dont thank me, Edward shot her the same icy look, You still have a lot to explain. Keep going. None of the places Carlisle sent me to really helped., Esme said, Nothing erased that night out of my mind. See, I wasnt allowed to tell anyone that I was attacked, so how could they help me? I almost told people. But I was afraid that if I did, I would be alone with a baby, and no way to support it. I had no other family to take care of me, I only had Carlisle. I hated itbut I needed him financiallyand even after all that happened, I felt I still loved him and maybe things would work when the baby was born. It didnt., Esme said after a little pause, You were a beautiful baby, Edward, and so happy, healthy, too. I was in a very dark place then, Edward. A horrible part of me, almost wished all my drinking had hurt youmaybe Id fall and have a miscarriage orthered be some complication during the delivery. Once I even stood at the top of a staircase, willing myself to fall down it so youd never be born. It was nothing against you, Edward. It was the man who had me that night. Thats what made me feel that way. I know that now, but thenI blamed you. I hated you for not being Carlisles son. I hated that you were the son of the stranger that attacked me. I couldnt bond with you like I should have. I didnt want to hold you or see you. I looked at Edward and his eyes looked down a bit, but he was being so brave and strong, even in the face of this terrible story and his own mother saying these things to him. I wanted to hit her myself just hearing her say the words. But then I tried to put myself in her placecould I love the baby of someone who raped me? Its a very difficult question to face. Katherine, Esme said, tears in her eyes, Was a lovely woman in her thirties who worked for us. I liked her a lot. She was warm and down to earthand she had a baby boy oncelong ago. But he died when he was a year old, he had a seizure in his sleep. I asked her if she would take full charge of you. She agreed, of course. Sometimes, Id hear her singing to you, rocking you to sleep. I once peeked in your nursery and you both looked so happy with each other. I saw that she loved youand you loved her. So I let it be that way. I avoided you all the time. I was still drinkingand had started to graduate to drugs. I would steal Carlisles prescription pad and write scripts for myself, getting anything I wanted. It was easy. Carlisle was never around, either., Esme said, I hoped he would at least try to be your father if I couldnt be your mother, but he was always working. Hed do a shift all night then find other things to do all day out of the house. For years, we didnt speak to each other, and we let the staff raise you without us. I have feelings, too, Esme., Carlisle frowned, I tried to bond with you, too, Edward. But every time I saw you, it killed me that you werent mine. That I couldnt have children of my own. And Id wonder if Esme was really attacked, or if she just cheated on me. You didnt look like me and you had green eyes. No one on my side or Esmes has green eyes. It was just a reminderI had fallen out of love with Esme and she didnt love me anymore, either. I felt nothing but guilt, anger and sadness whenever I tried to spend time with you, Edward. Im sorry. I know none of this is your fault. We both know that now. A little late for that, I thought to myself. If only this family had gotten some therapy together, the right way, by a good doctor, I thought, maybe theyd be alright now. And none of this needed to happen.

We stayed together as you grew up., Carlisle stated, Im not even sure why we didnt get divorced. Because the whole story would come out and Carlisle didnt want everyone talking, thats why., Esme said. No, thats not the whole reason., Carlisle said, I thought if Esme and I got divorced, shed blow all her half of the money on drugs and kill herself one day. Overdose. I kept trying to start over with her, get her help. Try this or that rehab clinic. I began taking her on these trips, all over the world, to places I thought could help her. Places where the story, if she told it, wouldnt get back to our town. Maybe I was stupid for that, but it was a nice little community we lived in. I wanted to keep our name good and respectable. I worked too hard to be looked at like some He stopped and took a breath. Trash?, Esme finished his sentence, Hes always looked down on me because I wasnt rich when he married me. All the money was his. Hed always remind me I had nothing. And if I left, Id have nothing againId be nothing. Those threats kept me Mrs. Cullen. Any love we had for each other was dead, I thought. But he kept trying to help me. He didnt divorce me so I stayed with him. I wasnt happy, butI was secureand safe. I still feared that man who raped me that night. He never went away, even after years and years went by. Once in awhile, I did try to see you, Edward, and play with you. On holidays, Christmases and your birthdays, I was there. And I did try to hold you and kiss you. But I could never feel your loveor make you feel mine. And, I also sawthat you loved Katherine like she was your mother. She was, really. I didnt think it was fair of me to pretend to be your mother when she was the one really doing the job, loving you like you were her son. You really were hers, Edward. Love made you mother and son. I was glad you had it with her. I knew I couldnt give that to you. Tell me about the night I brought Tanya over., was all Edward said in response to all this. I will let Carlisle tell that story., Esme shot Carlisle a look, Tell it, Carlisle. As you got older and went away to high school, things looked like they might be gettinga little better., Carlisle informed, Your mother found a doctor she liked and she had stopped doing drugs. She hardly drank at all. She was not cured, butshe was looking and feeling better. She had been away for months at a time, she was getting treatment in California. I was alone all the time. I hadnt been with a womanfor years. Esme and I were married in name only at that time. I met a woman at the hospital., Carlisle cleared his throat, I thought she was in college. She was volunteering with the little sick children, teaching them to paint. She looked so much like Esme when she was younger. And she was so good with the children. She reminded me of her. Only she was very happy and laughed all the time. She glowed. I tried to stay away from her but I always found myself in the area when she was there. I used to bump into her accidentally after shed finish with the kids. She always grabbed dinner at the hospital cafeteria. I pretended I was there, having dinner too, alone. We started to have dinners together three times a week. We were friends, nothing more. But, soonwe were very attracted to each other. We flirted, we started to hold hands at the tableI finally asked her for a date. I never told her I was married. And I told her my name was Carlisle Bonham. She was young and never questioned that. We both knew it wasnt a normal date we were going on. I booked a very beautiful suite at a fine hotel and she met me

there one night. We made love. Afterwards, she told me she wasnt a college student. She was a senior in high school. She told me I was her first. And she told me she was in love with me. I panicked., Carlisle said, I cared about her. I loved her, too. But I couldnt marry her or have everyone know I was dating a high school girl. I was hoping that Esme would be better soon and we could work on our marriage once she was totally sober and clean. And what if this girl was thinking of blackmailing me or something? What if she got pregnant? I didnt want to lose everything. I left in the night after she fell asleep. I moved my shift to nights again and never tried to see that girl again. I thought Id forget herin time. A long time passed. I thought of her all the time, but never expected to see her again., Carlisle looked up at Edward, But I did. When you brought her over that night for dinner. Edwards eyes turned lethal now but he stayed in his chair and I noticed his body tense. His fists clenched. I dont think she realized that you were my son until she saw me when you came in., Carlisle was staring at his shoes as he spoke, She looked surprised to me but I think my reaction to her was the one everyone noticed. I couldnt hide my panic and shock as well as she did. I couldnt look at her, Edward., Carlisle admitted, I knew that night as I was looking at her and hearing her voice, that I still loved her. And your mother was there at the tableand you looked so in love with her, too. I had to leave the table. And I was jealous of you, Edward. So jealous and angry I couldnt see straight. So I threatened you, not really knowing you very well, with taking the money away from you if you kept seeing her. I was a bastard. I kept your mother by using that threat. I thought it would work on you, too. But Katherine and Joseph raised you well., Carlisle said, You didnt listen to me and you chose Tanya. Before I knew what I was doing, I was calling your school and canceling everything Id given you. I was filled with hate and wanted to hurt you. I thought, I treated you like my son and gave you the best of everythingeven though you werent mine. Even though you were the son of a man who probably had an affair with Esme. It wasnt logical and I know thatbut I struck out at you hard for having Tanya. I still wanted her. And I didnt want to see her with you, or even know that she was with you. Esme fought with me and was screaming at me, asking why I was doing this to you. She said she wouldnt let me. She said we owed you a chance to have a good life. I was half drunk at the time, and I accused her again of loving your real father, saying she never loved meafter all Id done for you both. I told her she made the whole rape thing up, she had an affair. I called you a bastard and your mother lunged at me. I spun around and hit her. I told her she didnt love you, either. And this was the way it was going to be. I told her you were gone you werent coming back and she should be glad I cut you out. Seeing you was too painful for her anyway. I told her for your own good, to leave you alone. That we should both leave you alone from now on. Let you live your life without us. We were never your parents, really. Esme never mentioned you or that night again. She went back to California and I saw her once in awhile. We just passed each other now and then in the house, not saying much to each other. We tried to forget youand each other, hoping that would ease the pain. I tried to keep tabs on you, to make sure you and Tanya were alright., Carlisle said, I lost track of you for awhile after you left, but then I heard you and Tanya

were married. I went nuts all over again. I still wasnt over her, Id hoped maybe you would break up, or that she would call me or write me, trying to explain. But she didnt. Until after you were married. Edwards eyes glinted with wickedness at his father now. She wrote to you?, his voice seethed. Carlise nodded. She said that she was in love with you. She wanted you and not me. She told me off for canceling your college and putting you through years of Hell. She said she hated me now and didnt want me near any of you again. She told me she was pregnant with your child and she was happy about it. She said she would make you happy, she would send you back to college someday and make things right. She did love you, Edward. I could see that just from the passion of her letter. But I was still in love with her. I was so angry at her but I still wanted her. Thinking of you married to her and a baby on the way killed me., Carlisle confessed, I kept thinking of ways to win her back and then I felt sick for even thinking that way. I dont know why I couldnt just forget her. Time didnt lessen what I felt for her. It was like she had some kind of hold on me that never went away. I began to slip into using drugs. Id take it from the hospital and no one ever found out. I didnt care about medicine anymoreI never heard from your mother anymore that much. I began to even question my reason for living. I wanted to die. When the baby was born, I found out about it, and found out you named her Kaitlyn. I noticed that was very close to Katherine, the name. Anyway, I spent more years battling the drug addiction. I hardly practiced medicine at all during those years. I didnt even care what anyone thought anymore. And then I heard about Tanyas death. I heard about what happened to Kaitlyn. I was still on drugs at the time. I was broken hearted, knowing Tanya died hating me, that she loved you. And now Id never get a chance to see her again. I was filled with rage at you. I blamed you. I was jealous of you. Later on, when you came to the house with Kaitlyn, I was high. Esme was at the house that night, also very drunk. I had told her what happened to you and that killed any progress she had been making. She went downhill fast as all the guilt and fear came flooding back to her. We were both very screwed up. When you came, knocking and begging for our help with your daughter, I wasnt myself. I was still raging and hating you. I still wanted Tanya. I wouldnt let Esme help you, I forbid her from doing anything for you or your child. I told her to get rid of you or she would be cut off too. Esme was an addict. Her drugs and alcohol meant more to her than any person at the time. She chose them over you and your daughter. She told you we couldnt help you and closed the door in your face. Esme was quietly crying, not denying Carlisles words, she couldnt look Edward in the face now. There was a long silence and I doubted Edward could handle all this. But his face was still stone as he looked at them both. I almost said something but didnt. Edward leapt up to his feet and turned his back to us, leaning his hands on the kitchen counter and taking deep breaths, trying to deal with all theyd just said. I feared at one point he was crying but I didnt interfere yet. If he needed me, I would be there. I had to let him handle this, his way.

Finally, Edward spoke in a very low, almost unhearable voice. You never loved me., he said, not in a callous way, but almost, sadlyas if he had the answer to a question hed always had in his head, he said it almostto himself. His parents didnt say anything. They looked at each other without words. No., Esme told the truth, crying, We didnt. And for that, I am truly sorry. We did everything wrong. And even though it hurt you, Im glad we werent a big part of your life, Edward. You were raised with love. Youre a good man. Youre better off without us. We didnt want to tell you these horrible things. Another reason we never reached out to you. But we did want to explain things, as hard as the truth is. We owe you at least that. Be glad we didnt love you. We wouldve screwed you up, too. Your mother and Iare still married but were not really a couple anymore., Carlisle said, We have been in therapy together and separately for years now. After the last time we saw you and your daughter, after we realized how we turned you away when you needed us the most, we decided to do whatever we had to, to get better. To be better, for you. We know you dont want us or need us in your life now, Edward. Its too late and too much has happened between us in the past. You may never forgive us. And were not asking you to. But we will always provide anything you need, for Kaitlyn., Esme added, If you dont want us around her, well understand that, too. Edward was silent and his eyes looked very aged and tired suddenly as he looked at me. I was so afraid he was holding it all inside and not letting it out. Then I was afraid hed let it all out and I wouldnt be able to save his parents lives. All my life I wondered what I didwhat I saidthat made you both hate me so much you were never around., he said in a low voice, But nowthat I know your whole storyyou know it doesnt even matter. The person I was a couple weeks ago, wouldve been destroyed to find out his father was his wifes first time and that he loved her but not me. I wouldve been devastated to hear my mother say the words, no, we never loved you. It would have killed me and I wouldve let it shove me deeper down into my own Hell. But Ive cried too long over things that I have no control over. I cant cry any more tears for you. I cant even hate you. And hearing you say you never loved me doesnt really hurt me becauseI never loved you. I never knew you. You were shadows in my life. I was dreaming of having you, my perfect parentsand I didnt even realize that I already had the perfect parents. Katherine, JosephI know you somehow kept them from contacting me. That ends now. I will call them in a couple weeks and I will see them, whenever I choose. I dont want to see either of you there while Im visiting them. Edward paused and said, Im not banishing you from my life. You were never in it to begin with. I have my own life to correct and my own daughter to raise now. I cant carry the weight of you two anymore. Its broken my back all my life. So Im letting you go. I hope you find your way. But I cant let my hate destroy me inside. Katie needs me and Im not about to make the same mistakes you did. Im going to be there. Everyday. Im going to give her all the love I can and then some. I have to make her see that her Daddy loves her. I have to make her happy. And I cant do that if Im hating you every minute. So, even though I would love to kick your ass, Carlisle, for what you did to your wifeand mineI wont. Even though I would love to hate you, Esme, for never being my mother, and for loving money and drugs more than you ever loved me, I wont.

Youre not worth it. And it just makes me see that Tanya did truly love me. I was being as cruel to her as you were being to EsmeI was following your pattern, even if my blood isnt your blood. You were still poison in my veins. My hate for both of you was killing Tanya before the fire even happened. And it wouldve destroyed my daughter, too, eventually. Im not letting you kill us anymore. So, youre not dead to meyoure justnothing to me now. They both stared at Edward, not knowing what to say. I didnt really know what to say either, except that Edward was amazingly intelligent and utterly forgiving, as always. He didnt say it right out, but in his heart, he was forgiving them for all of it. He wasnt going to hug or kiss them, or even have them as part of his life, but he didnt need to. In his heart, he let them go and all the pain they brought with them. He was right, too about Katie. He could never be a good father for her while carrying all this crap around inside him. He dropped it all in one big thud at his parents feet. And he was going to walk away, free, to find his way back to Katie now. Part of me thought maybe he should scream and yell and punch Carlislebut what good would that do anyone, even him? I think he knew they didnt love him all his life, he just didnt know the reasons why. Edward waited for a minute or two and his parents didnt move or speak, either. Finally, Edward opened my notebook and tore a blank page out, writing something. He folded it once and took a deep breath, walking over and extending the paper to Carlisle. This is Bens address and phone number., he said, still full of hurt but calm and controlled, This is where your granddaughter lives. If you want to make anything up to me, do it by loving her. Even if its only a phone call or a birthday card, a visit once a year. This is where you can start to show Tanya how much you really care, and me. You can go now. But, Edward, Carlisle took the paper. GO now!, Edwards voice raged out loud now, full of fire and losing control fast, Before I do something. GET OUT! Edward turned his back to us again, staring down at the counter, waiting for them to leave. He was trying hard to restrain himself and be strong. I knew his shouting at his parents to leave was only because he didnt trust himself to hold out this tough exterior much longer. Alright, Edward., Carlisle helped Esme to her feet and they quickly made their way to the door, opening it and slowly going out. Esme said one brief thing before they left. Thank you, for seeing us, Edward., she wiped her eyes, ruining her eye makeup, sniffing, Youre very brave. Sorry. The door closed and they were gone. God, I hated them. Sorry. I wanted to chase Esme out in the hall and punch her nose. Edward let out a strangled groan and was panting, his forehead on the counter, his fists in his eyes.

I went to him right away, putting my arms around him and stroking his hair, not wanting to lecture him right now or try to be Dr. Bella. I just loved him, hoping it was enough. He let out this lion roar, his fist punching the counter several times, as if he were hitting them. What could I say to make this better? Maybe I needed James now. This was a lot to deal with. I think Im in way over my head here. Edward, I said once he had quieted a bit, I know all this is the most terrible thing youve ever been through. Worse than Raven, even. I cant even imagine what you must be feeling. I dont think Im good enough to help you now. Maybe we should call my professor to help you. No, Bella, YOU., his voice was cracking a bit, and it sounded like he was crying. He stood up, not afraid to show me the tears on his face as he clung to me, almost painfully, saying, I just want you. Please. I need YOU. Youre my doctor. I dont want anyone else. Please, Bella? Dont Alright, Edward, alright., I assured him. I hated hearing him nearly beg me to keep being his doctor, as if I would abandon him now, Im here for you always. Ill be your doctor. Its alright. He let out a very relieved breath and I heard him give off a couple of low sobs, burying his face in my hair. For what its worth, I stroked his back, You were completely perfect in the way you handled them. Ive never been so impressed by anyone before. I dont know how you handled that as well as you didbut Im so fucking proud of you. You did this to me, Bella., his voice sounded a little calmer now, his hot breath on my jugular vein, You taught me how to face them. Youre one amazing womanand doctor. I think he was giving me way too much credit. I might have helped him over these last couple weeks, but the truth is, Edward is the one who took control and who battled the fear and hurt to have some closure on this horrible chapter of his life. He would not just be okay nowit would take a very long time to accept all his parents had to say, let alone deal with it. But I believed that Edward would be able to do it now. He wasnt weak at all anymore. He has a reason to fightand hes finally woken up to it. Hes ready to live again. When I first met you, I took you to the Awaken room., Edward stroked my face and looked down into my eyes, I thought you were nave and sweet and that was the room for you. Little did I knowit was you whod wake me up. Sweetheart, I heard myself whisper, wiping his tears with my fingers, Im glad youre crying. Its good. Let it out. I feel so tired., Edward breathed, letting another tear fall down his right cheek, In my bones, I feel exhausted. Come on., I moved backwards, taking his hands and brining him with me, Lets lay down. Ill hold you and we can talk. Hows that sound? He gave me a weak smile, liking this idea, and there was nothing sexual in his eyes, either. I truly wanted to just hold him and talk things out. To be Dr. Bella, only cradling him and stroking him while he healed and shared his pain with me.

Wonderful., he said back with a fragile voice, then added, Love is the best medicine for a broken heart.

26 Notes: One question that a couple people have asked me, is: If Carlisle and Esme didnt really love Edward all that much, why would they pay him all that money? Well, while we all know Carlisle and Esme were very screwed up parents, I think, now that they are sober, and getting therapy, they do realize all their mistakes and that Edward was innocent in all this. They know at this point, they cant give him love or fix all the people theyve hurt, but they do have money, and they can give that. Guilt is very powerful and hard to escape. They both knew they had to make things right with Edward, or at least try to, for their own peace of mind, if they want to really try to heal and have a real life now. Also, Carlisle said he loved Tanya. And, as Edward said, if he really loved Tanya, then he can do something for Katie, who is a living, breathing part of Tanya. I think Edward saw that C & E are doing better now, and so he allowed them a chance to salvage themselves by offering them the chance to show their love to Katie. If they were still drug addicts or hateful people, hed never let them near her. But I think they do really want to make some kind of amends, and if its too late to love Edward, its still not too late to be good grandparents to Katie. Maybe, over time, if they do show that they are loving grandparents, Edward might even be friendly with them again someday. It wont be a big, loving family type of love, but maybe, in time, Edward can even have them come over on Thanksgivings and Christmases and have a nice time with them around. Of course, Katherine and Joseph will be there, too. C & E did a lot of screwed up things and they hurt Edward a lot, but in the beginning, they werent evil people. They just let a lot of crap ruin a nice family they couldve been. Looking at it from the other side, Katherine got the chance to have a son and raise him to be a good man and loving father, and some good came out of all that pain. I dont know if Im going to reveal who Edwards real father is, I dont know if its that important to the story. I dont want every character in the story to be somehow tied in to each other, that would just be too coincidental and not realistic. This man couldve just been a young doctor who found Esme attractive that nightand maybe he was a little drunk, too, they fooled around a little, and things went too far. He shouldnt have forced her, and maybe he was ashamed and disgusted with himself afterwards. Maybe he left town so he wouldnt be caught and lose his career. And yes, Edward does look a lot like the man who raped Esme, and thats why its so hard for her to look at Edward, let alone hug or kiss him. Edward even has the mans voice, sothats why Esme couldnt bond or find herself loving Edward. Well, let me get back to the story! Thanks, again, for all the great reviews! Love ya!

EPOV

I laid next to Dr. Bella, and it felt so right, even if it was inappropriate and unprofessional in the eyes of the medical world. Unashamed, I let the tears fall down my face and her gaze never made me feel weak or pathetic. She faced me now, both of us laying on our sides, staring at each other, safe and warm in the cocoon of each others embrace. She never wiped my tears away and I was glad. She wanted me to cry, to feel the hurt and release it in the salty liquid water that melted from my eyes that would rather adore her than weep. It took me a long time to process all the things my parents had said and to verbalize the most painful questions. Without thinking, I heard myself say, My father was a rapist. What a familyhe steals sexand I sell it. My eyes closed as she intensified her stare into me. Now I felt ashamed. I thought of the day I attacked Bella right here in her apartmentand how easy it had been. Hey., she said, her voice stern, Look at me, Edward. I made my eyes open and hers were right there, waiting to pounce. Youre not your father., she began, starting my therapy already, And he may have forced himself, but that doesnt make him a rapist. There are two sides to every story. Your mother said she had too much to drink. Maybe he did, too. She was kissing him in the beginning. Im not saying that he was right or that he didnt do anything wrongbut maybe he thought she wanted him. Maybe he knew later what he did was wrong. Maybe not. No one knows. Dont do that to yourself, Edward. Even if it was rape and he knew what he was doing, that doesnt make you something less than what you are. Thats HIM. You are you. A whole separate person. You were right when you said what you said to your parents. You have to let the past be the past. When I met you, you were so hidden from me. You had so many walls up around you, I never thought Id see the real you. It still amazes me, what youve done in two weeks. I think you WANTED to break freeand thats why it was so quick when I began to try to reach you. You wanted help. And that makes you more than Carlisle, Esme, your father, all of them. Look what happened to them when they refused to be real and get help. It makes me feel good that Ive chosen this profession for myself. Some people think psychiatry is stupid and useless, but Ive always known it could save lives. Now I see that, proven. You have to close the door on this past. You have to walk away and leave it there. Dont let it kill you. Walk forward, towards the future. Walk to Katie. Do right thereand youve broken this cycle of sadness and pain. Dont forget it, because you can never forget your past. But learn from it. Let it make you into something better than you were before. Let it make you a better Daddy for Katieso she can grow up and be a good Mom for her kids. This woman has a soul that heals me, inside and out, even after all my parents had said to me. A short time ago, Id be devastated right now. But, somehow, with her, and the way she explained things to meI couldnt believe I was feeling hopeand strengthand a feeling of freedom. My voice wouldnt speak but my lips had to confess again my love for her, and my appreciation for the miracles she was performing inside my mind.

I brought her hand to my mouth that I was holding, and my kiss softly rained like hot little drops over her fingertips, my closing eyes releasing two more tearsbut these were not tears of pain. I couldnt say they were joyful tears, either, but I felt like something in me was gonethere was a beautiful void where once I had tons of shame piled up, and stored a large self loathing, boxes full of uncertainty and anger, and the biggest of all, a gigantic beast that gobbled up all of my self esteem and licked his fingers clean afterwards. I didnt feel them anymore. And I cried, so relieved to be free of their hard weight. Now I have lots of space to put afternoons with Katie, and I can play the music of her little belly laughter. I have lots of room for Bella, too, shelves dedicated to her many different kisses, the images of her beautiful face and body as we became one in so many ways, all of them amazing. I have loads of room now for visits with Katherine and Joseph, I can almost hear her irish accent screaming Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!! when I appear at her door. She will crush me and deafen me with her screams as she holds me, but I so look forward to that. And in that moment, I truly thanked God. YesI do believe in you, you bastard. I have to if there is a Katie, a Bella, a Katherine in this world. So, I was wrong, alright? You are real. Maybe, if I can in some small way forgive Carlisle and Esme Cullen, I can perhapsforgive you too. I still dont understand or agree why youd have to rob me of my wife and Katie of her mother, but someday you will explain it all to me. Unless youve already penned my name in for Hell, and I would totally understand if you did that. But from now on, Im going to be different. Not to save myself from an eternity of flame and torturebut so that when I go, I can look back and see some good things that I did on this earth before my time was up. Even if that one thing is Katie, grown up and happy with her own family, thats enough for me. The only other thing bothering me now was Tanya. And I said it out loud. Why would Tanya not tell me?, I whispered, Do you think she still loved Carlisle or something? Maybe she loved him more than me. Bella kissed my nose and pondered for a moment. She loved you, Edward., Bella stated without thinking twice, She loved Katie. I just think she was carrying a lot of guilt too. Maybe she was afraid if she told you, she would lose you. She shouldnt have kept it all inside, but she loved you so much she wanted to make things right. I think she blamed herself for all yourfatherI mean, Carlisle, put you through. I think she saw you werent cruel or cold like Carlisle, but she didnt want to take a chance on losing you. The pressure got to be too much, later on, I think, for her. Things werent working out the way shed hoped and she felt like a failure because she couldnt send you off to college and medical school like shed dreamed. Thats why I think the lack of love making happened in the end. It wasnt you. You cant really make love to someone else when youre hurting inside and dont love yourself. Maybe at times, it did make her feel weird, being with you after she had been with your father that way. Im just guessing. No one but her could really tell you everything. I think Bellas rightagain. Damn, that can get annoying sometimes, how shes always perfectly right. But I couldnt fault her for it right now. The way Carlisle was just acting, towards Esme, I confessed, I was acting the same way with Tanya. I accused her of not loving me, I always made insinuations that she was cheating on me. I hated it, but I saw myself in Carlisles eyes just

now. I wish I could tell Tanya how sorry I am. That I dont hate her. That I loved her. You just told her, Edward., Bella kissed my hand now and I saw she had tears in her eyes, too. Id never get through all this without you, Bella., I replied, never more honest in my life, Youre more than just the woman I love. Youre my lighthouse. You made me seeyou show me the wayyou bring me home to shore. God, I sound like a romantic novel. But its true. Sappyand the most truth I had spoken in a long, long time. Youve been in that raging ocean for too long, Mr. Cullen., she smiled sweetly at me, Its nice to see your feet on the ground. God, I love you, Isabella Swan. I have a good idea., she brightened suddenly as my eyes opened a bit more, drinking her in as she half-sat up, on her elbow, Why dont you call Katherine and Joseph now? Oh, I dont know, I began, not sure if I was ready for that. What if they were mad at me or something for just leaving and not trying to call all this time? I couldnt bear it if she hung up on me or something just as awful. Come on, thisll be good for you. Love is the best medicine, remember?, she urged, getting up and then coming back with my cell phone, tossing it to me. It bounced off my chest and landed on the bed beside me. What happened to strong Edward?, she stroked my hair as she sat next to me again. Alright, damn., I pretended to frown at her, then smiled as I scrolled to Katherines name in my contact list, Hope the numbers not changed. I waited and felt my heart pounding at the ring sounded twice. Cullen Manor. May I help you?, her irish voice was so beautiful, just like I always remembered. But she sounded tired, without her energy. Katherine?, I grinned, I missed the bus, can you come pick me up from school? I used to do this to her all the time. She would be livid and read me the riot act, telling me to be more responsible and not to hang around after school talking to my friends instead of getting my ass to the bus on time. But I still called her endlessly with this requestand she always came to get me. She was gasping nowunable to say anythingthen she was crying. Katherine, pleasedont cry, I felt tears in my own eyes now. I didnt admit it or realize just how much I had missed her. My boy, she breathed, trying to get her voice back, My beautiful boy This was my nickname, what she always called me. I hadnt felt beautiful for years, and I felt this sudden shame and guilt about all the things Id done in the last few years, using my beauty to earn a sleazy living. But, at the moment, I

couldnt hate myself or feel any guilt about that. I felt guilty for letting years go by without talking to her, for not even writingfor letting her slip out of my life. We talked for a long time and she scolded me for walking out that night without coming to talk to her first. Her fiery spirit was back, just like that, and she was the strong, fierce mother Id always adored. I told her all about marrying Tanya, and went on forever about Katie. We talked as if we never spent a minute apart, crying over the sorrows of each others livesand laughing as we shared good memories back and forth. Then I told her about Bella Swan. Bella smiled at me and blushed as I showered her with compliments and told Katherine how important she was to me. I said that Bella brought me back to lifeand that I had found love again, when I never thought it would happen to me twice in a lifetime. I didnt tell her about my time at Fire, or my slave life, or Victoria. It would break her heart and I couldnt do that to her again. I kept apologizing to her, and she would only apologize in return. She said she stayed with Carlisle and Esme, only because she knew Id call or come back someday. And as for the reason she never contacted me, that was Carlisle. Carlisle told her I said I hated all of them and I never wanted to see any of their faces again, even the help he told her Id said. As if Id ever call her of Joseph the help. I want to go to the Waldorf and beat Carlisles ass now. I told her Id never have said that, I told her she is my motherand that I didnt say it enough, but, that I love her. I always loved her. We cried some more, as she declared her love for me in return. It was nice to hear again, but I always knew she loved me. Her every word and gesture dripped with love for me, always, even when she got mad at me and told me off. She scolded herself, saying she knew that was horse shit and she shouldve known better. I raised you to be a good boy., she sniffed, I know how kind you are. Im sorry I let myself believe such a thing. The call had lasted for hours but I felt so fucking good, talking with her again, that I couldnt seem to say goodbye. I was afraid maybe shed get in trouble, but then I realized Carlisle and Esme were in New York, shes at their house, she wont get caught on the phone. The boss wasnt home, so she only had to make dinner for herself and Joseph, anyway, unless there were new people working there now. Bella laid next to me on the bed, closing her eyes, smiling, enjoying hearing me this happy after my parents visit earlier, glad her suggestion brought more healing into my heart. Katherine tried to locate Joseph so I could talk to him, but he was off the grounds, tending to something else. She made me give her my phone number so she could call me again. I gave her my cell, simply saying it was the best number to reach me on. I told her I wanted them back in my life, as often as possible. I want to talk to them at least three or four times a week I said, if they wouldnt get too sick of me. Stop talking that shit., she said in her impudent accent, Youre my son, you better call me all the time, boy, or therell be Hell to pay, kiddo!!

I know, sorry, forgot who I was talking to., I chuckled, all traces of sad tears gone now. It felt like the call was coming to an endand I hated it. But I felt like I had just gotten a whole new skin like a warrior in a video game that just drank a potion and got all his life and strength back, when he was almost ready to fall down dead a second before. Bella is right, love is a fucking medicine a lifesaving shock to the heart. Im just thankful that I finally had found a doctor in time and she was able to save me. I really feel saved. It feels so good. I know I have a lot of work to do yet to free myself from Victoria, but Im not even that scared about it, somehow. Im already free. I love you, Mom., I said with a huge smile. With a little sob, she answered, I love YOU, Edward, my little boy. I snickered at that, seeing she was right on about me. In a lot of ways, I was often still a little boy. And proud of it. Ill call you tomorrow, okay?, I asked, Tell Joseph to be around. Then, I may be out of town for about a week. So Ill call you a little past a week from Sunday. I hated lying to her, but I didnt want to tell her about my upcoming week of servitude to Victoria and possibly risking my life. Shed have never let me do it, no matter how it would help my life in the long run. Katherine is stubborn, very like Bella. Alright, my love., she said, sounding very different from the voice I first heard when she answered the phone. She sounded happy, relievedalive again. Grinning, I stroked Bellas cheek now, watching her lips curl up more at the corners. Talk to you soon, Mom., I said, a bit louder than a whisper. I never wanted to say goodbye to her again, even at the end of a phone call. Alright, darlin., she replied, Take care of you. She said that all the timeI almost forgot. A lump rose in my throat and I choked, I will. You too. Talk to you tomorrow. She sighed in contentment as she hung up. I closed my cell phone and Bellas eyes opened, like a curtain being pulled back, exposing little windows into Eden. Hi beautiful., I smiled down at her, twirling a finger slowly around a nice, silky lock of her hair that now looked black against the pale blue pillow beneath it. Told you., Bella said like a know it all child, Mothers always love their sons. Always. You know everything., I tickled her ribs a little with my other hand as she laughed and twitched in my clutches, and I added, I dont like it. Yes you do., she closed her eyes again, resting under me. Maybe I do., I agreed without much of a fight.

I kissed her lips as if my touch might damage her if it was too harsh. If you dont want to go out tonight, we dont have to., she said, misinterpreting my mood. Are you crazy?, I smiled, and she looked up at me in wonder, Im free of decades worth of painI have my mother back. Im a week away from being free. Im the major player in a police sting against VictoriaI have all kinds of things to celebrate! Were going! You just dont want to get all dressed up in girl clothes! She giggled and gave me the most passionate kiss. It nearly hurt my mouth but I was 110% kissing back. I want to celebrate, too., she agreed, Ill dress up.

EPOV No, we cant do this!, Bellas eyes were alive with light and shock as I held out my hand to her. Come on, Bella., I flashed her my most charming smile, taking her hand and twirling her, holding her against me as her back slammed into place before my chest, Dance with me. We arent invited to this!, she whispered a yell at me as I chuckled, moving my hips behind her beautiful ass as we danced to the music. Well, I danced. Bella was resisting me again, her usual stubborn self. The Pretender by the Foo Fighters was playing. I love this song !! Come on, Bella, have fundance with me. We dont have to be., I placed a quick kiss on her lips as I put my hands on her little waist and made her dance a little, even if it was against her will. Edward!, she widened her eyes at me. God, she looked so beautiful. I dont know where the dress came from, but it was a cute little black, sexy dress. Simple and elegant, showing off her long, gorgeous legsaccenting the cleavage very nicely, too. Every man here had his eyes on my girl. Look at those black high heelsDAMN. I went out and bought a nice suit earlier, a black jacket and pants, with a burgundy shirt and black leather tie. It was elegantbut cool at the same time. Bella looked very happy with me when I emerged from her bedroom in this. The more she looked at me lately, the more confidant I seemed to feel. I love that look in her eyes when she sees me now. I was looking at Bellas stockings nowthere was a thin, black line traveling down the center and back of each leg, disappearing down into the back of her shoe. I didnt know why, but it was driving me crazy. That is super hot. This is a wedding, loosen up and have fun, Bella., I whispered in her ear as I bit my bottom lip and danced, using my professional dance training now, hoping shed be impressed by my moves as I traveled around her, and she stood there, stunned. We dont even know these people., she gritted through her teeth.

So what?, I smiled again like a boy, There are 300 people here. Whos gonna know? Bella turned pink and looked around, as if the police were going to come breaking in at any moment and arrest us. I love Bella, but sometimes she can be a goody two shoes. I thought I taught you to be bad., I teased, yelling over the music, Arent you a graduate of the Edward Cullen Institute for Bad Girls of America?! Come ON! Dance!! And then I added a swift slap to her ass and she screamed out, and in a few seconds, she was dancing with me. She was so adorable and shy, she told me she wasnt a great dancer, and she was embarrassed to dance to a fast song, so I took her by the hands and moved her with me, silently guiding her. I wish I knew about this before. I couldve taught her some dance moves. But I didnt care if she could dance or not. She was here with me, having fun. All is right with the world tonight. I love wedding crashing. Especially at this place, the Merion, its called. This place is very beautiful, lots of rooms, all elegant and luxurious. This room we were in now even had a cascading waterfall on one side of the wall. There was also a round skylight above the dance floor so if you looked up you could see the ebony blanket of sky and the diamond sparkles strewn across it. Later, when we sat at a large, empty table, two tall glasses of champagne were brought over to us. The room was dark and the guests were dancing. This was a nice, lively bunch of guests, not an assortment of old people glued to their chairs. The excitement and fun was so thick here, you could cut it with a knife. I was already having a great time. And I was glad I brought Bella here for our fancy, dress up date. I want to make a toast., I smiled, handing her a glass as I took mine. She blushed deep red and looked down at the red table cloth, lifting her glass timidly, always hating to be the center of attention, even if it was just mine alone. But there were things I needed to say. Bella Swan, I said with a quiet but clear voice, I brought you to a wedding, because, its the beginning of things, even though this is our thirteenth day together, and seems to be almost the end. She looked down and I tipped her chin up to me, seeing her shining eyes of sadness staring back at me. This is not the end, Bella., I said, making my eyes turn seriously on her now, I want you. I want you forever. You brought me back to life. Even with all Victorias sick lessons, its you whove taught me where my place is. Its you I belong to. And thanks to you, I also belong to myself. I love you, Bella Swan. I clicked my glass to hers and smiled, taking a sip of the best champagne I ever had and peeked over at her, seeing her sipping hers, too. I love you, Edward., she said, just at quietly as I had spoken.

I know youre afraid., I put my forehead to hers, closing my eyes, Nothing I say will stop you from feeling that. If I were you, Id never let me do this. But I need to do it. I need to stand up to her. I need to face her and tell her NO. Finally No. Even if I didnt have other reasons to go back in thereId want to do this. Ill have to play the part for a few days before I can snoop around the clubbut thats the price Im willing to pay to end this once and for all. Please say you understand. You always understand me. After a pause, she kissed me and said, I understand. My light, I breathed, seeing a lighthouse in my mind again. Im sure Im not the only one whod be shown the way by her light. She was going to help thousands of people in her lifetime. Im just the first. I am honored by that privilege. I was kissing her, not even wanting air after thatand I almost forgot we were in a room filled with people when the food began to be served to us. We dined on filet mignon and lobster, along with about fifty different appetizers. I felt like I hadnt eaten for a year as I inhaled every thing they brought us. Bella just ate like a bird, looking at me and laughing to herself. I know, I eat like a pig. Sue me. I dont get nice, big meals like this very often. We were soon joined by a really fun bunch of people at our table, then, as they ate and joked and laughed without a care in the world. They asked us, in a very friendly way, who we were related to, bride or groom. We said bride. She looked very beautiful in her modern white silk dress, her brown hair perfectly done up into a bun. Right away, we were accepted and included into the conversation. We laughed and had lots of fun with our new friends. Bella even began to relax and giggle a little bit. I watched her intake of alcohol, she was being very good, having sodas instead of hard drinks now. The champagne was the only one shed tried. We had all the silly fun of a wedding reception. We did the chicken dance, we did the electric slide, the chain, we threw ourselves into the festivities and laughed like nerds through it all. My jacket was on my chair most of the time that night and a couple times, other girls tried to get close to me and dance, but Bella was a watchdog. She eliminated any female who even looked me over from afar. But she kept her dignity and class. I loved dancing in front of Bella. She watched me like I was the most attractive thing shed ever laid eyes on as I moved around her. I have been ogled and grabbed, had hundreds of eyes on my cock before as I danced. But Bellas eyes made me feel special. I am special. Im Katies fatherIm Bellas man. I am special. And I believe it now. When it came time for the bride to toss her bouquet, Bella sat that one out. I laughed and wondered why and she answered without me having to ask. My father would absolutely destroy us both if I said anything about marriage right now., she smiled, then quickly added, Not that I dont love you and would love to be married to you someday. But thats a long way off., I finished her thought, not wanting to seem angry or upset. She looked at me and I explained.

There are lots of things we need to do before we reach that point, I know that., I said, You still have school and your career to start. I have a life to rebuild and a little girl I need to get to know all over again. Not to mention, I have to figure out what my life is going to be once I give up my illustrious career as exotic entertainer. I laughed and she joined me, relieved I wasnt proposing to her just yet. Well figure it all out, Bella., I said, Together. Im not rushing you. Im not going anywhere. Wait. Im not? Arent I going to Florida after I get out of Victorias? I cant just call Ben and say, I want Katie, bring her to me please, thanks for taking care of her all these years, bye. I would have to live with Ben and Angela if I wanted to be part of Katies life again. She loves them, like I love Katherine and Joseph. Its not right for me to rip her out of that homethat family. I have to join them, not take her away. And Bella has school here. She wants her career to be here, in New York. Having never thought freedom was an option for me, I never considered all this until now. Shit. How is this going to work? Bellas face looked a little sad to me, then, and I wondered if she were thinking the same thing as I was. Would Charlie be okay with this, was another question I was now asking myself. Our beginning isnt exactly what Dads dream of when thinking of their daughters perfect mate. There are a lot more hurdles before us besides just Victoria. We didnt talk for a little while, we sat and listened to the music. Bella went to the ladies room and came back with a little grin on her face. What?, I asked her, wondering what she was smiling at now. Nothing., she blushed, Gosh, cant a girl even go to the bathroom? I squinted, suspicious already. Bella is no actress. We spent some more time on the floor, dancing a couple slow songs, and a fast song, too. Bella liked slow better, not a huge fan of the fast dancing, unless it meant my hips were grinding against hers. She liked my version of dirty dancing. The song we were dancing to now ended and we clapped, waiting for the next one. The D.J. said, on his microphone, This next one is a request dedicated to Edward love Bella. ((*Im not sure whos idea this was on ff, but you were right! This song is perfect! Thanks for your suggestion! Love ya!*)) She blushed deep purple as I squinted at her. She came to me and put her arms around my neck as I touched her waist, hearing the music begin to play. The Pretenders began to playIll Stand By You. Awww, she began, Why you look so sad? The tears are in your eyesCome on and come to me, now. Dontbe ashamed to cry. Let me see you through. Cause Ive seen the dark side, too.

Tears already formed in my eyes now, hearing the words. In an instant, I was back at Dr. Bellas place, crying for the first time as she fought for the first time, to begin tapping her hammer on my wallsmy prison. I remembered laying my half naked body across her sofa, hoping shed approve of my flesh, praying she wouldnt peek inside my head. I recalled Bellas stern, frustrated expression as I avoided her questions, giving her the story of Superman when she asked about my parents. Bella held me tight to her and I heard her sniffle, too, remembering like I was. When the night falls on youdont know what to donothing you confesscould make me love you lessIll stand by you. Ill stand by you. Wont let nobody hurt you. Ill stand by you. Like a movie, I was seeing our every moment together, from the start. God, these lyrics fit us. Theyre almost perfect, as if written for us. I almost laughed at how I was in the beginningand what I was now. I saw myself, taking off my shirt, tucking it into my jeans like an apron, making her Omelet de Eduardo for the first time as her bottom lip hit the floor. I heard myself, in the past, that day, saying, Breathe, Bella. Soif youre mad GET MAD. Dont hold it all inside, come on and talk to me, now. And hey, what you got to hide? I get angry, too. Bet Im a lot like you. Bella was singing along in my ear and I felt a tear fall out of my eyes, feeling so emotional suddenly, but now, not caring who sees, not hiding it or anything from Bella. Now I was in my blindfold, being slapped by Bella as she played Victoria, shoving me to get in touch with my inner anger, and I heard myself from the past, again, screaming Take your fucking hands off me!! And I remembered how good it felt to let it all out, to spew my venom and my true feelings about my owner. I recalled kicking in her bathroom door, rescuing her from the bathroom witch that sealed her inside that day. I smiled, seeing her fall flat on her breasts, on her bedroom floor, and crawling naked to the bathroom. Then I was in my vampire cage, stuffing her notebook down my pants as her face flew into a panic, trying to reach her mortal hands into my deadly cell. I remember asking Bella to follow me to a private room, feeling the sweat on her palm as I led her to be awakened, or so I thought at the time. When youre standing at the crossroads, and dont know which path to chooselet me come along., the song played on, Cause even if youre wrongIll stand by you. Ill stand by you. Wont let nobody hurt you. Ill stand by you. Take me into your darkest hourand Ill never desert you. Ill stand by you. Bella was singing to meevery word. I could see her in the grass, naked beneath me. I saw her laugh as we walked down the streets of New York togetherI felt her skin and oil as if I were massaging her right now for the first time. I could see her in the shower, letting me wash her beautiful body. I saw her in the pouring rain in the alley behind Fire as she shouted that she loved me, her eyes full of fury. I felt her hands on my back, caring for my wounds after my night with Raven. Youve been neglected, Bellabut Im here now., I heard myself saying to her that night in the shower.

I even saw her choking on coca cola at the best Chinese restaurant in New York. And when, when the night falls on you, baby. Youre feeling all alone, wandering on your own, Ill stand by you, Ill stand by you. Wont let nobody hurt you. Ill stand by you. Take me into your darkest hour. And Ill never desert youIll stand by you. I love you, Bella., I laid my face into her neck as we rocked slowly in each others arms, letting the song fade as we kept dancingstill hearing it in our own hearts. I love you, too, Edward., she said, looking right into my eyes as guests all around us danced. But to me the whole world was just her and I. And it was perfect. We kissed each other like it was the first time. I figured it was better to dedicate that to you, rather than sing it to you., she teased later. Yes, thank you for that., I joked back, earning a slap to my back. We danced for a couple more hours and ate even more. My eyes never left Bella. There are no other women in the room for me except her now. And for me, that is saying a lot. I used to work rooms like this without even breaking a sweat. Now I cant even recognize other ladies. Later, I had managed to sneak away from Bella and slip the D.J. a few bucks to announce me. I was sitting at the beautiful grand piano in the corner, in the dark. Alright, we want everyone on the dance floor now., the D.J. announced, This is the last slow dance of the night. Couplesget up here. This will be nice. Edward, a friend of the brideswill play us, You Raise Me Up. I almost grumbled at him, I wanted it to be a surprise what I would play for Bella. Come on, fingers, dont forget your stuff. Dont fuck up. A light was shining on me and I kinda hated that. It would make it hard for me to see Bella in the darkness. I played, and the room was very quiet. Couples moved to the floor, slowly moving together as I smiled, glad my hands were cooperating tonight. When I am down, and hold my soul so weary When troubles come and my heart burdens me I sang and no one was making any faces of disgust, so I kept going, looking up in the direction Bella and I were sitting in, at least letting her see my face, if I couldnt see hers. Then I am still and wait here, in the silence Until you come and sit awhile with me. You raise me up so I can stand on mountains. You raise me up to walk on stormy seas. I am strong when I am on your shoulders. You raise me upto more than I can be.

Come to me, Bella., I said then, into the microphone as women screamed their approval out there, as I played the notes and melodies after those lines. In half a minute, Bella was sitting beside me on the bench, tears falling down her cheeks as I leaned in and kissed her wet face, not taking my hands off the keys, and we got a little applause as I went on with the song. You raise me up so I can stand on mountains You raise me up to walk on stormy seas. I am strong when I am on your shoulders. You raise me up to more than I can be. Now the chorus could be sung loudly, with lots of joy, instead of softly, like before. I belted it out, striking the piano keys without mercy. You raise me up so I can stand on mountains You raise me up to walk on stormy seas. I am strong when I am on your shoulders. You raise me up to more than I can be. I looked at Bella and played, singing very softly again now, You raise me upto more than I.can be. She kissed me hard after my final piano notes were played, and we got a nice, loud round of applause. I couldnt be sure, but I think I may have even blushed a little. Thanks for the lessons, JosephDad. You are the best singer., Bella was saying later as we strolled home. She was holding a red rose I stole for her from one of the centerpieces, swinging it beside her like a magic wand as we enjoyed the night air, the lateness of the hour depriving the streets of many New Yorkers. I had to admit, I loved walking out this late at night. Its almost like everything is asleep. The buildings, the traffic, the noise. Its so peaceful and quiet now. I love peace and quiet. I loathe noise. I laughed at her compliment, shaking my head and saying, Josh Groban was probably having a seizure while I was doing that number. Bella giggled and looked at me as the wind danced around her hair. No he wasnt., she smirked, Youre great. You made me cry, you were so good. You should think about a career in music. Id buy your record. Ordownload it on itunes. Youre a bit biased, Bella., I smiled, But thank you. I havent played in so long. I was sure Id mess up and humiliate myself. Its not like a bunch of half-drunk wedding guests would be able to tell if you did., Bella replied. Thanks again, Bella., I feigned insult as she laughed out loud.

I didnt mean it that way., she assured, Really. You were great. Youre always great. I smiled and put my hands into my jacket pockets, taking my time as we walked home. So, tomorrow is Sunday. I began, not even wanting to think about tomorrow night, And you get to pick what we do tomorrow. Anything you want. Hmmm she tried to make herself sound light about it, I dont know. Ill have to think about that. Its our two week anniversary. Its very special. Every day with you is special., I corrected, meaning every word, taking her hand in mine, almost home.

27 BPOV UGH!!!, Edward kept shouting out as he dug his nails into the arms of Dr. Bellas favorite chair, UGH!! FUCK!! DONT!! STOP!! FUCKING!! ME!! UGGHHHH!! I think that means he likes this position. I wasnt saying anything much, just screeching, covered with sweat, my back to Edward as I bounced harder over his steel cock. My legs were aching, my knees throbbing and my body absolutely exhaustedbut I couldnt stop. This was the best sex Id ever had and I never wanted it to end. I noticed the sun starting to rise out the living room window and felt a stab of pain low in my chest. Today is Sunday, day 14. Edwards fingers tightened around my arms, right above the elbow, as he yanked me back and forth, the slapping of my ass on his pelvis was so hot and wet soundingGod, I think my hair is even sweating!! I love it when Edward and I make love and its the most precious thing in my world. But at the moment, we were fucking like grunting animalsand it was FUCKING AMAZING!! Thumper IS his name! His cock is hitting places in my body I didnt even know were THERE!! Fuck God, youre in my clutches now, little girl. Never was a sentence more true than that one Edward had said to me early on in our time togetherand remembering it was making me cum, along with the savage pants of breath coming from Edward behind me. Take this therapy, Cullen. Dr. Bellas gonna make it all better now. God, I am one twisted Dr. bitch. I love myself this way. I heard a little high-pitched sound from Edward and nearly laughed. But I was too busy having what felt like an asthma attack. My throat feels so dry and I can

hardly swallow. Thats not good, especially around this one behind me. He loves to lubricate my throat. I felt it coming nowmy chair was squeaking for mercy as I felt myself go completely over the edge, howling out and screaming like a banshee. I love the smell of Cullen cum in the morning. Come on, Edwardgive it. Oh FUCK!!, he was screaming out, GOD DAMN IT!! FUCKING SWAN BITCH!! Okay, now I was going to laugh, but Id do it quietly so not to embarrass him. Not that hed hear me over his own screams of profanities. Edward loves to swear as hes cumming. I took no offense. I am a Swan bitch, after all. I never yelled out, Cocksucker Cullen when I came. I wonder what hed do if I tried that later. Tucking that note away for future reference He shoved himself high up inside me as he released, pulling my wrists back harder, keeping them there as he exploded, the warm wetness filling his condom inside me. Holy shit. My legstheyre shivering. I feel like a horse waiting to be put down. But, a smiling horse waiting to be put down. I can hear Edward behind me, gasping for air. I hope his sweat is trapped in my chair now. Ill love smelling that every time I sit here. I can see myself getting hot, sitting here while watching The Golden Girls or something equally lame next week. I kept swallowing, wondering where all my saliva went as Edward curled his arms around my waist now, his heaving chest at my back as he laid his cheek there, his lazy lips trying to kiss, but making more of a warm little bow upon my flesh. I love getting it from behind. I love it soooo, soooo much! After a long game of who can catch their breath first, Edward spoke. I think youre right., he breathed, This is the best position, the best spot in the house. Told you., I swallowed, feeling a dry ache there, You must always argue, though. It had to be done., he gulped, For the sake of science, it was best to test out every areaand every position. Now we have proven results. I was about to reply with a grin when his fingers fisted in my wet hair and he drew my head back tight to his lips. Tell me you didnt enjoy that extensive research., he dared. I enjoyed it., I managed to say, God, how I enjoyed it! Being thorough is Hell., he released my hair, pushing my head a little roughly, But its worth it. His hips thrust up and he ordered, Clean off Frankie.

What a little punk! Did he just give me an order? Men. They love to feel in charge. How cute of him. For the sake of the day, Ill humor him. But hell get his later. Revenge is a dish best served cold. Whatever became of that little submissive man that I purchased? I moved off his softened penis and he gave a little wince and hiss at that. Falling onto my dead knees, I turned towards him, removing the condom gingerly, placing it on the TV guide on my coffee table, right on top of President Obamas smiling face. Oh no, thats not right. Ill move it to Mrs. Obamas face. I cant do that either. I love them. Theyre so cool. I opened the TV guide and found Ryan Seacrests face. Perfect. There you go. Seacrest out. Or should I say in? What the hell are you DOING?, Edward the brat peeked over at me. God, someones all cranky after just having raw, sweating pig sex all night! Is this it? Does this mean the honeymoons officially over now? Is two weeks how long it takes before a man goes from being Sawyer from Lost to Dan Conner from Roseanne? This is the stuff they never tell you in Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks movies. Hmph. I am so going to bite him. Purely accidentally, of course. I licked, not a big fan of cold cum. But its 80 degrees outside today, so I guess I can deal with it. Mmmmm., Edward hummed to himself. All is happy now in Edwardville. Men are so easy sometimes. Suddenly I was reminded of a crying baby whod just got a bottle and sighed contentedly. Oh, I still love you, you little creep. Lucky for you. Now be nicer to me. And here it comes. I love your tongue., he said, dreamily, his eyes closed. Youre gonna adore my teeth, then. OW!, he jumped, Bella. Sorry., I gasped, Are you okay? Yea., he frowned for a second, closing his eyes again, Just be careful. Its so sensitive now. No teeth, please. Im sorry, sweetie., I said with such a solemn tone and I kissed and licked the head so reverently, a wicked little smile on my mouth that no one would ever get to see. Only me and Godor Satan knew of our accident. Thats alright, Bella, he forgave me, his voice back to its soft tone as his fingers played in my hair, I love it when you hurt me. This is fascinating to me. Do you realize if we women could figure out how to keep men this subdued all the time, we could own this world forever? Maybe we can make some kind of device to inject into their testicles when theyre bornthis could be a world changing idea. Is it wrong to use Edwards penis for future world

domination? I bet if I asked his permission right now hed say yes. I bet if I asked him for an island right now hed say yes. Frankie is all clean and ready for his day., I announced after I was finished. He let out a very pleased sigh and when I looked up at him he was again, so beautiful. I love the stubble on his face. He always shaves it off but I wished hed do the bad boy thing and leave it sometime, let his hair get longermmm what an image. I noticed Edwards lash marks were starting to fade a littlepink marks now, not red anymoreand all closed up. I kissed Edwards inner right thigh, hearing him purr again as he sank lower in my chair, not very eager to get up. What about me?, I raised a brow to him, wondering if I would be receiving a cleaning. What about you?, he teased, playing dumb. Mrs. Frankie might need a little freshening up, too, you know., I grinned. Hmm, he stood up and lifted me to my feet, and in a second my stomach was resting on his bare shoulder. He carried me to the kitchen and took out a nice red apple for me, lifting to my mouth, saying, Bite. I bit into it, hearing the crackle of the skin as I ate a huge chunk of it, chewing as he bit into the same spot Id just eaten. Mmmm, so good., he commented, taking me towards the bathroom, I want all my food to taste like Bella now. Rub it between my legs, then., I dared, laughing at my racy remark as he let out a big giggle, pushing into the bathroom door. You naughty little thing., he chewed, I dont think you even want to be clean! Clean is so over rated. I know that now. I like being dirty. Its more fun. He put my feet down in the shower and stood outside it, turning on the water, and instant ice cold water came shooting out over me. AAAAAAA!!!!!, I screamed like Marion Crane in Psycho. Quickly, Edward tried to turn the dial, his face twisted in horror as he realized what hed done. Hot water came out now but when I opened my eyes and looked at him, it was clear I was doing a good job at looking pissed, going by his pale, scared face staring back at me. Im sorry, Bella., he began but then burst out laughing. I tried to remain furious but he is too damn cute when he laughs. This reminds me of the day I almost went out in my robe to school. Same belly laugh, same tears in the eyes because hes laughing so hard. God damn it, I love you, you little whore. Youre my plaything now. No one elses. Get over here and service me., I reached out, yanking his face to mine, ravishing those dark, sulking lips.

Godyes, he mumbled in my rough kiss. Fuck God, youre in my clutches now, slut!, I growled. Edward let out a big pant of breath and he whimpered. He god damn whimpered! I think he likes this, me being in control of him, being a little mean. I took the apple out of his hand and decided it was mine now. He had work to do. I had him in the shower with me now and I pulled the shower door closed with a hard thud as I pushed him down, opening my legs like Wonder Woman. Do a good job, slut., I demanded as the water eased my legs and knees, and I saw his smile as his face disappeared underneath me. Yes, Bella., he whispered, taking a nice hard bite of my right pussy lip. I screamed out, wincing as the hot water laughed mockingly at me. Oh, sorry, sweetheart. Are you OKAY?, he pretended to be super sorry as I had done to him a minute ago, and he smiled up at me, letting me in on the fact that he knew Id taken a bite of Frankencock on purpose. Damn. Alright, were even now. No more biting. Unless I ask for it. She thinks she can act., Edward muttered as he enjoyed his revenge, and now was getting soaked by the water, licking and stroking my warm little pussy. He was doing so well and being so damn thorough, as usual, that I dont know why it came into my head to do what I was about to do next. Maybe I just wanted a little revenge of my own. I took the shower nozzle out of its holder and smirked like Lucifer, pointing the hot showers of water over his back, down his fine ass as he moaned, wordlessly thanking me for sharing the water. Then I spun the dial all the way to the C on the right. Enjoy the cold water, baby. Edward let out a scream that could rival that of Nathan Lane in The Birdcage and I prayed his teeth wouldnt clamp down around my sensitive, fragile flesh between my legs. He jerked back hard, hitting the shower door with his shoulder, and the fucked up door flew out of its tracks, landing over the toilet, resting on the sink beside it. I screamed, thinking he might have hurt himself but instead he grabbed the showerhead from me and with evil eyes, pointed it right up at my face. I dont know how I got away, but I did and was running out of the bathroom for my life, a naked and soaking wet Cullen on my heels as I yelped and stood on the other side of the chair, the only place I could really try to hide. He was on the other side, gritting his teeth, his hair dark and wet, hanging in his eyes, his face glorious and full of fire as he was determined to catch and possibly punish me. I tried to psych him out and pretend I would run rightthen leftthen right again. He moved with me, as if we were a mirror image, he was quick and agile and I would not be getting away, no matter which way I went.

My hair was dripping wet and so were both our bodies, but we didnt care. This was war. You think youll get by me?, he frowned and then let this evil Norman Bates smile grow across his face. I was just playing., I breathed, You know that, right? Oh, yes,, the wicked grin was still there, I know that, sweetie pie. Its just a gameyou dont have to be scared of ME. Oh shit. Im dead. Note to self dont spray Edward Cullen with ice cold water. He doesnt seem to care for it. Wheres the sweet, fragile little Edward that always asked me if it was alright with me? Remember, Edward, I still own you., I pointed, desperate for any truce I could work out, You said I rule, remember? You said anything I want, youd do. His eyes turned lethal on me and that smile. My flesh is afraid! That was then., he said darkly, This is now. I RULE. Fuck!! King Edward is here and hes pissed! Run, peasants, run!! Thanks a lot, Dr. Bella! I screamed and sprinted over the sofa to try and reach the bedroom but before I could land on my feet, he was upon me. He pounces like a cat!! DAMN! I need to start working out. NOOO!!!, I screamed, NOOOO!!!! God, Im so hard right now!, he growled as he pinned my body to the floor of my bedroom, my wet nose to the wood. His arm was braced behind my neck, his stiff cock pressing into my ass as he sounded only slightly out of breath. I was going nowhere. Congratulations, Edward. Long live Frankencock. He breathed behind me and pulled my arms back, folding them behind me, almost painfully. Tits to the floor again. Bad Bella, he scolded into my ear as I awaited his wrath, You really think you can outrun me? I didnt dare talk back now. I was staring at the hard wood floor, watching the water droplets land there from my long strands of hair. I can feel his wet body on mine, his hair raining a few drops of cold water over my backhis hot breath tickling the back of my neck. Ive been too easy on you., he gritted, Youre spoiled. I thought maybe hed spank me and I secretly wanted that. I wasnt even thinking of what it was he had in mind until His fingers dug into my ass cheeks and spread them apartand pressing the head of his cock to the hole of my ass, he waited there and I felt my eyes widen, my mouth fall open, only hollow little sounds falling out.

Say your words, Bella Swan., he said seductively but dangerously, If you dare. I almost said them. Lo meinlo meinmy brain was screaming at me to say it. No. Not on the last daynot after how much Ive learned and grownnot now. I wasnt ready to become little prude Bella again. Id never be her again. Fuck you!, I said, hoping he knew that meant I was still dirty, sexy Bella. No, Bella, he stroked my hair and spoke with an angels voice, Fuck YOU. And he slowly pierced his cock into my tight little hole and I let out a guttural scream. I felt tears in my eyes. Say lo meinsay it! No!! Fuck off! He grabbed my hair and pulled. Shut up., he demanded, Relax. I wont move. Dont tense. Thats it. Thats a good girl. I cried softly, not wanting to scare him. I panted and tried to follow his instructions. He was all the way in, I think. God, it fucking hurts! Do you want me to stop?, he asked. Nono!, I breathed in then outtrying to soften my tight muscles. His fingers were quickly stroking my clit now, rushing it to total pleasure. I moaned, loving his touch and actually now finding his cock not so bad in there. Thats it., he kissed my back for a second, Feel the pleasureand the pain. Make them one. Dr. Bella is in. First Edward doesnt like to be raped. He told me that. But now that he realizes he is in control, and that he now rules, he is fucking me in the ass. Maybe he thinks I want this. Maybe he enjoys being the fuck-er instead of the fuck-ee. Maybe I was very bad and I am being punished. Maybe he just wants to introduce me to anal sex. God knows hes shown me everything else. Or has he? Probably not. Ill bet theres a million games he could play with me. Second This talk of making pleasure and pain one. I bet he had to learn this from day one with Victoria. I hate thinking of that bitch while Edward is inside me. I have to stop now. Make them one. Pleasure and pain. How the hell am I supposed to do that? More coaching, please, Cullen. Swan is confused. Make them one, Bella., his voice was now gentle and I wasnt crying anymore. Very slowly, he moved inside me and every little vein and ripple of his cock seemed to stir things in meI let out a little yelp and cry of anguish as he began to slowly move upward, his hands now stroking and kneading my ass cheeks, trying to distract my attention away from the virgin hole he was conquering. He let out a very deep groan, almost all the way out, but not. The head remained inside. More?, he asked me.

Yes., I blinked, feeling a couple tears falling to the floor below me. Yes., he agreed, slowly coming forward again as I let out a screech, my fists clenchingand then instantly trying to relax themselvesand a subtle wave of arousal was beginning to bud inside me. This was so raw and taboo for me. It was almost wrong. But I shoved that idea away. There is no wrong for us. I wanted to experience thisuntil it didnt hurt anymore. I wanted to learn what he knew. How to make pain and pleasure the same. How to cum from the both of them at once. I wanted to be his slave and please him. I wanted to make him proud. He was very patient with mehe went so slowlyand stopped often, talking me through it. He stroked me and kissed me. As we practiced, I became braver. I really pleased him when I lifted my ass to his cock, meeting his thrusts with very slow stretches. He gave me a very good, Bella for my courage. I was not ready to cum upon this first experience, but I did feel very good when Edward came inside mewith no condomeven if it was in my ass. I realized what a big step it wasI was saying I trusted him and he wanted to be inside menothing standing between us. Maybe some might have found us filthy creatures, doing something like this. But I felt good. It felt right. I liked it. And I would do anything Edward wanted me to try. And in all fairness, I was very bad. I deserved a little punishment. Maybe thats how he is punished. Edward is not completely cured, and I know that. He still has lots of road to travel before he leaves behind all traces of Fire and Victoria and slavery. And thats okay. I am in this for the long haul. We will work on this every dayuntil its just a distant memory. After we had a little time to process, and Edward saw that I had survived and I had calmed inside his arms, we realized the shower was still running. Together, the two of us nude, tired people went into the bathroom and put the door back in place, Edward washed my sore ass and body, and then wiped the floor off. Edward, stark naked, on all fours, wiping the floormmmmI want that on my Christmas cards this year. As we cleaned up, I decided I liked angry, dominant Edward. He was a little scary, but he got my full attention. And I would never shoot him with the cold water again. Ever. Maybe that triggered something. He said he got hosed down sometimes. Im sure that water is not nice and hot. He did say once, if I went near Fire again, hed go so Dom on my ass. He wasnt kidding. Oh, well, at least my ass is not a virgin anymore. Edward had been everywhere in meand I felt glad. We talked about it over breakfast and again, his candor never ceased to amaze me.

As he made us some eggs, and after I very carefully sat on the stool, wincing as my ass touched the seat, Edward decided to interview me. I didnt ride you too hard, did I?, he asked, his green eyes very bright as he looked into mine, a real concern there. No., I felt my face get hot, It was just right. Thanks forgoing slow in the beginning. I had to., he was cracking eggs, I didnt want you to shit on me. He was snickering and I almost let myself get mad at him as he worked. But then, something else occurred to me. This was the last morning hed be here, making me breakfast. I almost wanted to say something witty, to joke back, like, You say the most romantic things But I couldnt joke. I couldnt breathe. Im kidding, Bella., he looked at me and smiled and I tried to smile, too. Oh my God, I hurt you., his face turned sad and filled with regret as he left the eggs and came towards me, referring to the anal sex wed just tried, You hated it. No, I didnt., I tried to explain, I meanit hurtat first. Its not that. If I wanted you to stop, I couldve said my words. I chose not to. Im not upset about anything we did. I haveloved every minutewith you. Then I turned into a girl. I burst out crying. Oh, Bella, he came to me and was behind my stool now, his arms around me as I turned towards him, clinging that beautiful, bare back of his. Its because its Sunday., he said, not asked. Then I knew he realized it too, and had been trying to act, like me, that everything was alright. Its not. Listen to me., he said in all seriousness, This is NOTour last day together. I swear it, Bella. I wish youd believe me. I do., I sobbed, But Ithinking of you going back there I was sobbing louder now, wondering how the hell I was going to get through a single school day now while he was at Fire, having God knows what happening to him all day and night. Bella., he jerked my chin up and I saw his face, struggling to remain composed and not let himself fall apart with me, I need you. I need your strength today. I dont want to cry and say goodbye to you all day. I want to have fun with you. I want to feel the sun on my face and watch the wind mess up your hairand I want to lick a cherry icee off your body. I want this to be an ordinary, lazy daya fun day. I dont want this to feel like the last day. Please, Bella? Can you please do thatfor me? I sniffed. You want to lick a cherry icee off my body?, I asked, in a teasing voice. And I had his smile. And he had mine.

Yes, a Bellacherry icee would be justparadise., he planted a wet kiss on my mouth and wiped my eyes with his thumbs, saying, Drink your orange juice. My butter is burning in the pan. I turned, feeling my sore ass as I watched that sweet back of his while he saved the butter and began to make our eggs. Is that a metaphor for something else?, I asked, I know my butters been burning in the pan for the last two weeks now. He laughed out loud and almost sparkled as he glanced at me. Your butter wasnt even out of the fridge until I came along., he said in a droll voice, taking two plates out of the cabinet. Oh, up yours!, I retorted and we just looked up at each other. Let me rephrase that., I blushed, thinking again of how hot he was awhile ago when he said, No, Bella, fuck YOU.and penetrated me. I forget Edward has this very dark side. Maybe because hes so damn adorable most of the timethat the dark side is very well hidden. But its there. I must be more careful in the future about that. In the back of my mind, as I had my cock in your ass, I kept thinking Charlie was going to come walking in behind us., Edward confessed as I laughed, thinking of it. I just imagined a giant shot and a hole opening up in my face while I fucked you., he shuddered. There are some pretty pictures rolling around in that head while were having sex., I shook my head as he put our plates down. Im very paranoid., Edward admitted, The only time Im not is when Im following an order. Nothing can go wrong if youre obeying an order. Choosing for myselfused to scare the hell out of me. It still does., I squinted, looking at him, knowing it. Okay, it does., he took a bite of toast, Im working on it. So far, everything Ive chosen seems right. Youtaking down Vickitrusting your Dad. I think Im doing good for a beginner. I dont know., I smirked, You also fucked me in the ass. You asked for it., he bit in his toast again, showing teeth at me as he did so, a little glint of evil in his eye, as if he were biting ME. I liked that statementI rule., I smirked a second time, lifting my eyes to his as I stabbed some eggs with my fork, I was very impressed by that. He chuckled, You were very scared by that. I never saw you turn blue before. I had to laugh. It seemed, magically, we could really talk and play-argue and the outside world almost melted away. It was still out there and tonight would be damn hard for both of us. He would be going. I would lose my mind. But today I tried to give him his wish. For today, it was a fun Sunday. Nothing bad could go wrong. No horrible fate waited for us tomorrow.

I would try my best.

BPOV After Edward made sure I deposited my forty thousand dollars, and after he wired Kaitlyns five million dollars to Ben, we started strolling around town, letting New York choose our fun for the day. It seemed there was a big festival going on in town today. And as we walked together, we wandered right into the middle of it. It was a beautiful May afternoon and we soon found out it was a Pow Wow Festival, celebrating native Americans. I love the whole culture. The peaceful Sioux Indianstheir beliefs. And I love Dances with Wolves. God, I sound stupid. Moving on We were drawn into town by the beautiful music we heard. It wasnt an Indian chant or war cry kind of music. It sounded like flutes, but different from any Ive ever heard. When we found the source of the song that had captured us, there were tall, handsome Indian braves blowing into special native flutes made of what appeared to be bamboo or some similar type wood. They wore detailed and magnificent costumes and headdresses. It sounded like a love song, or at least I thought so. It also had a deep sorrow to it and my mind almost drifted again to tomorrow. Edward held my hand and kissed it as we stayed frozen in our tracks, unable to pull ourselves away from the anguished melody in the air. Later, we came upon the fierce warriors who were chanting and dancing. It was explained that warriors would do this, the night before a battle, to pray to the spirits abovefor courage and strengthand to return home quickly. Edward and I looked at each other, a little secret smile between us as we watched the men dance and pray at the same time. They allowed anyone who wished to join in, to dance around the fire. We figured it couldnt hurt us to give it a chance. We would need all the help we could get tomorrow. Edward where he was goingand me where I was staying. Im sure we made complete fools of ourselves, but we did our best. Edward looked amazing doing itI felt like an ass, no pun intended. Since we joined in the dance, Indian names were bestowed upon us. An old man with a peace pipe looked at Edward, after he had named five people before him, and gave him a stern look in the eyes, not speaking for a minute. I almost got scared he could see into Edwards thoughts and knew he gave me anal this morning. I would fall down dead if he named Edward Fucks in the Ass. But, finally, he said, It is hard to see you at first. I know., he said with a strange, quiet voice, Im sorry. Im trying to work on that. I call youFreed Eagle, the man said and I couldve kissed him. The look on Edwards face was the most beautiful thing. He looked so honored. It was perfect. I wondered if this man really could see it in his eyes.

Thank you., he smiled like a child, as if he just received the keys to the world. He stepped aside and I was behind him, giving the man the most loving smile I knew how. I began to thank him and he quickly named me. I call youEndless Voice., he said and Edward let out a big laugh, saying, God, this guy is good, Bella. We should bring Emmett here. Not an insult., he assured me, putting a hand on my shoulder, Your voice has power. Your voice is medicine. You healalwayswith this voice. Damn, he is good. I believe. Now that we were Indian warriors, we decided to get our faces painted. We were being kids, having a great time, doing everything. I kept peeking at Edwards face that was being worked on as mine was being done beside him. This was supposed to tell you something about yourself, too, they said. Edwards face had a black line under one eye, going straight down. They told him that was a tear. He has cried for too long, the woman told him. The other eye has no tear, because he will not cry for a long time now, we were also told. Also, Edwards lips were lined with white and black stripes. The lady told us this means his mouth is a prisoner. He does not say what he should say. The white parts symbolize his want to, but the black show he is still holding his tongueand must speak if he wants to free his words. My interpretation was pretty cool, too. I had these cool blue designs around my eyes and was told this means my eyes see things other eyes dont see. I assumed this meant by looking into a person, like a psychiatrist would do. I also had the yellow symbol of a healer on my cheek and my lips were painted all white because my lips speak the truth and say things that kill sorrow. I have never been to one of these festivals before. I said to Edward later as we sat under a tent, eating Indian food, I used to spend my weekend inside reading all the time. They have been so friggin accurate, its spooky. I know!, Edward said and I smiled again at how cute his face was in his makeup, When he called me Freed Eagle, I almost passed out. That was the coolest thing ever., I agreed, I nearly bawled. I am free, Bella., he looked right at me, Going there tomorrow wont change that. Im not really going to be hers when I go back. Im just playing a part. I know, Edward., I sipped my can of coke, Im just so scared for you. And I have to go back to school tomorrow. Thatll be fun. I missed two days already. Im sure Ill have lots of homework to keep me busy while Im worrying about you. Im glad youll have something to do., Edward said, And I want you to have Rosalie and Alice with you. Let them hang out after school and do homework with you. I dont want you to be alone. In fact, maybe you better stay with one of them while Im gone. Just to be safe. I dont know.maybe., I shrugged, not wanting to be away from our place. There are so many good memories there nowI cant imagine it without seeing Edward everywhere already. That will probably hurt more, being at my place then, alone.

Bella, Edward took a bite of his food, You wont behelping Charliewill you? I mean, you wont be in his car, listening to anything thats going on in the club, I hope. I squinted. My father would never allow it, first of all. And secondly, I didnt know if I was tough enough to listen to Edward screaming and being hurt, and not moving to go save him. I felt like a coward for feeling thatand at the same time, I wanted to be somehow involved and close by as he went through these terrible next few days. No., I sounded sad to myself, Im not invited. We just want you to be safe., he explained. I know., I sighed, hating this more and more. Charlie would only tell me things he would decide I needed to know. He would not give me details. I hate being protected. It means youre not trusted enough to be on the front lines. Hey, Im the mastermind of the entire rescue of Edward from Ravens place. I can be trusted! Im a tough cop! Later, as we walked, we found all kinds of stands selling things. I bought Edward a beautiful bear claw necklace, a leather string serving as the chain, a warrior necklace, to take the spirit of the bear with you into battle. He loved that. He wore it proudly. I took a fancy to this thing called a Rain Stick. Its a long wooden staff with a beautiful design on top, coming to a point, and when you lower it, beads inside fall and it sounds like its raining inside the stick. It reminded me of the night I told Edward I loved him for the first time, in the pouring rain. So that was my gift from Edward. I felt like a powerful sorceress, carrying it for the rest of the day. As the sun began to get lower in the sky, we both got quieter. We had done a pretty good job of having fun all day and eating and dancing, kissingbut the day was fast beginning to fade. Night was coming. Tomorrowwas coming. Edward wasnt even in the mood for his cherry icee on the way home and I didnt push him on it. We were stuffed full of good food so dinner wasnt necessary. Upon entering the apartment, we just both seemed to walk to our bed, holding hands. We laid down on top of the covers, staring at each other in the moonlight, carefully touching each other without a word. It felt like, to me, that we were memorizing each other one last time before we were separated. Is it alright if we dont make love tonight?, he whispered and for a second I felt heartbroken. Didnt he want me anymore? Its too hard tonight., he explained, stroking my cheek, I justcan I justtouch youlook at you? He blinked then and a silver tear shone in his left eye. I think I understood. We didnt have to do it one last time to prove anything to ourselves. He will be backhe will be backI had to keep saying it to myself over and over. I wish my head will believe it already. And we had gone at it all night last night, like bunnies. Maybe he knew then that he would not be able to pretend tonight. I was kissing his black and white lips, telling Freed Eagle how much I love him. I guess Endless Voice is a good name for me. Even when I cant talkI can say

things to Edward. And I know he hears me. He was kissing me back, holding my face in both his hands. Believe it or not, it was one of the nicest nights wed ever spent together. We didnt say a thing, but he held each other, kissed innocently like a black and white moviestroked each other, tracing every inch and angle of the other.shed a few tears here and there. It was a magical night. I wouldnt have traded it for all the sex in the world. Charlie had called around ten that night and said hed be over at 5am to prep Edward. I hadnt thought of Charlie being around when I had to say goodbye to Edward. God, I hate that. Rosalie and Alice were also called and promised to be here at around 5:30am to be with me for moral support. Edward kept whispering to me during the night to try and get some sleep, that I have school tomorrow. I tried to close my eyes but then I jerked awake and held him closer to me, shivering from the thought that Id wake up and all this would be a dream, that my Adonis was only a wonderful creation of my imaginationthat hed be gone, on his way back to Victoria, without having to speak any painful goodbyes. He didnt sleep much during the night, either, and I felt guilty about that, too. We didnt sleep at all last night, and if he got no sleep tonight hed be completely exhausted Monday morning when he really needed his strength to be at full. I loved the way he looked with no shirt on, and his black bear claw against his ivory skin. I kept kissing and licking the clawand Edward moaned as I took it into my mouth, sucking on it. Fuck, Bella, he looked at me as I kept doing it. I need you, EdwardI want youplease. In seconds, my shirt was being yanked off me by King Edward, my pants being tugged down by eager fingers, those full, pouting lips closing around mine. Fuck me, Freed Eagle., I growled and he attacked, giving me exactly what I wanted. Shut up, Endless Voice., he breathed back wickedly, his tongue wet and hot and invading my mouth, effectively silencing me. Give me your Rain Stick, Cullen. Pound me until I fall asleep. I have school tomorrow. Later, we both found the most pleasant sleep, holding each other as we dreamt of nicer things than what was coming in the next few hours. I didnt even hear Charlie knocking on the door at 5, while the darkness still lingered outside the windows. Only when Edward was getting out of bed did I awaken and begin to realize that it is Monday, day 15. Fuck. I heard the door opening and I sat up, not wanting Edward to face Charlie on his own. Entering quietly, Charlie looked at Edward and his brow furrowed as he looked over the smeared war paint on his face. Edward had obviously forgotten about his makeup and so did I until the kitchen light flipped on. Hi Mr. SwanCharlie., Edward looked tired and a bit confused, yawning.

Charlie didnt appreciate seeing Edward with no shirt on, but I was glad he had put his jeans on at least. I was in the bedroom, in the dark, struggling to get my clothes from yesterday back on before my Dad put two and two together. Oh, who am I kidding? He knows we were having sex, but I didnt want to flaunt it in front of his nose. This all must be so hard for him, too. I had told Charlie over the phone earlier that Edward had gotten my money back, plus twenty thousand more. That seemed to ease him a bit towards Edward, but he still wasnt doing cartwheels over our relationship. One thing that made me nervous now that Edward would go soon, I knew that talk Charlie wanted to have with me was coming up. I hope he knows to wait until Im done crying before he starts. Hello Edward., he said back, not sounding all that pleasant, but not abrasive, either. I hate when Charlie is middle of the road. I came out of the bedroom and Charlie squinted at my face now, trying to figure out why we both looked like we had given each other a childs facial last night. Hi Dad., I rubbed my lips a little, looking at my fingers, seeing black smudges and white mixed in. Hi Bella., he said, sitting on the stool in the dining room side, taking some things out of his duffle bag, without saying any more to either of us. UmEdward?, I raised my brows at him, Maybe you should.wash your face and stuff. He frowned, looking clueless and then after a few seconds of seeing my face, probably reminding him of Paul Stanleys the morning after a Kiss concert. Oh!, he touched his cheek with one hand, wiping it and rubbing his fingers to his thumb, Yea, be right back. He rushed into the bathroom, closing the door, and I heard him inside, mumbling, Oh Jesus! as he got a look at his reflection now, probably mortified that Charlie had seen him this way. I grabbed a dishtowel from the counter and turned on the kitchen water, getting an edge of it wet and squeezing, trying to non chalantly rub my lips with it, as if this was no big deal and normal for me. On the counter now was a notebook, opened, with my fathers handwriting all over it, a strange looking needle with the plastic wrap still on it, a little round plastic case, and a pair of ear buds with a little black box attached to them, a red light shining a dot out of the top. Whered you get all this stuff?, I asked, hoping he wouldnt ask about the makeup or anything sexual about Edward and I. Circuit City., he blankly replied, The bug is really from an intercom system and I justused what I needed out of it. What about this?, I almost picked up the needle thing and Charlie reached out, ready to stop me. I took my hand away, not giving him any problems. Vets office., he glanced at me, They shoot these things into dogs every day.

Youre using a DOGS needle on Edward?, I said too loudly, enraged. Its not USED, its brand new., Charlies brow went into a hard line across his eyes, Ive done it before, it wont hurt him. I heard him brushing his teeth now in the bathroom, the water running. Dad, do you know what youre doing ?, I dared to ask, feeling so afraid suddenly, If you dont, just say so now. I dont want even the remote chance of anything happening to him. Bella., Charlie looked up at me sternly, I wouldnt get involved if I didnt know what I was doing. I wouldnt risk anyones life even his if I Even his?!, I hissed, not wanting Edward to hear that. I didnt mean it that way, Bella., Charlie sighed, We will have this talk later. Fine. I started slamming things in the kitchen now as my father ignored me. Edward was showering and shaving as I fixed bagels for all of us. I toasted a few and spread cream cheese inside, shaking up the orange juice and pouring three glasses. When he came out, a nice cloud of steam followed him to the bedroom as he got dressed and I peeked in, noticing he was gathering his things, dropping them into his bag without a word. I wanted to cry but I sighed instead and opened the fridge, staring at the contents as if they had some help to offer me here. After a while, Charlie said, Youre letting all the cold out of there. I gritted my teeth and growled low, Shut. Up. Dad. He muttered something about the electric bill and I slammed the door shut, glaring at him as he wrote in his god damned notebook. Edward looked beautiful and fresh as he came up to stand beside Charlie. He was wearing a snug blue t-shirt and jeans, sneakers on his feet. Okay, Im ready., he said, swallowing, his eyes on the things on the counter. NO! I wanted to bellow at him, forbid him to leave, tie him to the bed until they came to pry him out of my cold, dead hands. But I didnt. I held it in. Just like I told Edward not to do. My once endless voice was silent, imprisoned. Edwards soft eyes tilted up and touched mineand we exchanged sad faces. Alright., Charlie half turned himself towards Edward, First off, let me tell you what I found out so far. The kid you saw get killed is Jason White. He was reported missing by his parents. Good student, average kid. He graduated high school a few months before he disappeared. Parents arent sure but they think he mightve run away from home, according to the report. There was some fight they had with him the day before he was gone. Probably came to New York, then, and got involved with the wrong crowd. This city eats runaways alive. And this kid came from the south, very sheltered type, not very street smart. Maybe he was hooking on the streets and saw something one night that got him in trouble.

Im guessing on that right now, I cant be sure. In time, Ill know more. He was never found. God., Edward looked at the floor and I felt sick. What if Edward disappears and is never found? As if Charlie read my mind, he said, to Edward, Thats not gonna happen to you, though, Edward. Charlie stood up, taking the plastic off the needle, adding, Give me your shoulder, kid. Looking at me again, Edward pulled up the right short sleeve of his t-shirt, exposing the shoulder and turning towards Charlie a bit. My hands started to shake as Charlie opened another plastic wrapper, swabbing the meaty side of Edwards arm, below the shoulder. I heard Edward exhale as Charlie injected the needle into Edwards skin, and then I heard a click. Ow., Edward commented instantly, not sounding all that upset by the shot. Let me test it., Charlie sat down, opening his laptop, clicking the keys and waiting as Edward looked at me again, lowering the sleeve back into place, no mark left behind by the dog needle. Alright, the chip is inand its working., Charlie sounded pleased, You are now at 312 Meyer Avenue. Thanks, Dad. I sneered with sarcasm, Edward, have something to eat. I made bagels. I sound so weak right now. I am weak right now. And Im so pissed at Charlie. I dont want to know where Edwards body is, I want to know that hes going to be coming out of there as soon as possible and safe and unharmed. Thanks, Bella., he tried to smile at me, coming around in the kitchen, touching my waist lightly and placing a kiss on my still messy face. He took a bagel, sat down, and started to break it apart in little pieces, eating it as my father began coaching Edward. I didnt want to leave the room, but I also didnt want to say goodbye to him with my face smeared with paint, either. I washed my face with soap in the kitchen sink, using the mirror of the toaster to see what I was doing. Edward peeked over at me and smiled to himself, popping another piece of bagel into his mouth as Charlie was going on about acting normally in front of Victoria. Dont come right out and ask to go into her office if thats not normal., Charlie spoke to Edward as if he were a dope, Wait for the safe opportunity. Dont take any chances, at all. If you are in real trouble and need me to come in there, I want you to say Nostradamus. Got that? Nostradamus., he repeated, Got it. Can I say it now?, I asked, not wanting this to go any further. They both looked at me and didnt answer. I went back to slamming things around.

Opening the little plastic case, Charlie took out a little black square, so small that it could sit on the tip of his finger. This is the bug., Charlie said, Keep it in its case until you get a couple blocks away from the club, then put it in the side of your mouth or under your tongue. The saliva wont hurt it. Just dont bite down on it or swallow it or anything. Its fragile. Just place it somewhere in the room whereshe takes youtoyou know. The dungeon., Edward said it aloud, where my father couldnt. I let out another breath, grabbing my hair near the roots as I leaned over the kitchen sink, wishing I had enough food in me to barf. Maybe that would make me somehow feel better. Yea., Charlie looked at Edward, and put a hand on his shoulder, I want to tell you, Edward, I didnt like you when I found out about you and Bellaand your little arrangementand I still dont want you seeing her after this is done. BUTdoing thistakes a lot of balls. I wont let you down. Calluse your wordand Ill be there. I wont call until I have some real evidence and my blood sample back., he said with no weakness in his voice, Whatever you hear, dont come near the place unless I say that word. And I dont want Bella ever hearing any of it, either. I would never let her hear that, Edward., Charlie agreed, She already knows that. They both looked at me again and I had my hands over my mouth, tearing my fingers through my hair again, wishing I could stop shaking. Alright., Edward looked at Charlie now and extended a hand towards him. Charlie looked at Edwards hand and then shook it as Edward gave a relieved smile, adding, Thank you, Charliefor everything. No problem., Charlie replied, cracking a little smile. It may not have looked like much to the outsider, but to me, and knowing my father, it was as huge a gesture as a warm embrace. Um, Edward looked at me and then Charlie, Could wehave a few minutes? Oh., he frowned, looking at me, then Edward, I guess. Charlie stood up and walked into the kitchen, tapping me. I spun my head around, the tears already blurring my vision as he muttered, Ill protect him, Bella. Hell be alright. I felt my fists clench. But then I hugged my father, whether he wanted me to or not. I tried not to cry as he patted my back, letting go and leaving without looking back, probably getting emotional and trying to hide it from me. Tough cops dont cry. Okay, Charlie, whatever you say. I peeked up at Edward, who stood there, on the other side of the counter. His eyes hurt to look at. Too fucking beautifulhypnotizingunreal. He walked slowly over to me and before I knew it, I threw my arms around him and was sobbing into his soft t-shirt, feeling his pecks under my cheek as he held me close, his lips resting on my head, touching my hair.

Shhhh, he rocked me gently, just letting me bawl without stopping me. Im sorry., I wept, my voice sounding like a seven year olds, I just love you too much. I cant let you go. We wont be apart., he said, his voice low and morose, Youre with me, always. Thats a bunch of crap., I cried more, Dont say pretty things, dont lie to me, Edward. Alright, I wont lie., he jerked my chin up again and I saw tears in his emerald eyes and it scared me, It sucks that I have to go back there. I dont know what shes got waiting there for me and I feel sick to my stomach that I have to walk back into that place and kneel and wait for it. But this is what I have to do so I wont have to look over my shoulder for the rest of my life, so Katie can go to school and I wont have to wonder if someones gonna get her that day. This is a fucked up thing I have to do, but Im doing it. Whatever happens, Ill do it. For you. For Katie. For me. This is going to be hard for both of us, but your father is with us. Emmett is with us. And if my calculations are correct, Rosalie and Alice are probably outside right now, waiting to come in here for you, too. Ill be fine. I will be back for you. I love you, Bella. I love you, too., I whispered, letting the tears run down my cheeks as he wiped them away, kissing me. Im glad youre crying., he smiled down at me, Its good for you. I clung onto him tighter and let a pained moan escape my lips, then my breath hitched sharply as I looked up at that perfect, strong face. I did this. I taught him to fight and to stand up for himself. And it was because of me he was going to do this terribly dangerous week with Victoria. I swear to God and everything thats holy, if she hurts one hair on his head, Ill kill her. Go., I forced myself to say that one little word and Id rather have lost my hands. He slowly moved towards the door and I spun around, grabbing his arm. He looked at me and I said, quivering with terror, Be careful, Thumper. He gave me that crooked smile I adored and answered, I will, Bambi. I will not say goodbye to him. This isnt goodbye. It cant be. I wont let it. The doorknob squeaked as he turned it. He turned around and took a long look around the apartment, smiling more. If he was anything like me, he could see us everywhere as he looked at the sofa, the stools, the kitchen, the floor, the wall, the bedroom, even the bathroom. Ill need lots of therapy when I come back., he smirked at me, opening the door carefully, tossing his duffle bag over his shoulder, Be ready, Dr. Bella. I let out a strangled cry and tried to manage a few more words before he went. Of course, Mr. Cullen., I breathed, the tears still falling from my eyes, Youre my only patient. Be on time. I hate late people. He tried to laugh but he turned away, casually wiping his eye, but I noticed.

Ill be on time., he said, his voice cracking a bit. I turned away, not wanting to see him leave and close the door. I was dieing insideand then I heard his soft footsteps out in the hallway, about to descend the staircase. He left the apartment door open, not wanting to shut it, either. I heard his steps going downstairs and I held in my pain until I knew hed be outside, unable to hear it. My legs shook, too hard to stand anymoreI let myself sink to sit on the cool kitchen floor, and that felt much betterand certainly safer. My shaking hands held my mouth shut until the door out to the street closed with a small thud. Then I fell apart. I dont remember much of anything specific. All I knew was that he was gone, on his way to bleed for Katieand me. I heard sounds coming out of me that I didnt even recognize. I gasped for air, feeling like I was slowly suffocating as I sobbed mindlessly. Without even hearing them approach, suddenly I was being hugged and stroked by two sets of arms, sweet perfume and apple lotion filling my nostrils. Alice and Rosalie. My friendsmy sisters. I clung to them, crying on their shirts as they sat on the floor with me, not talkingjust comforting menot allowing me to endure this all alone. I heard my fathers car outside, the engine starting up. Edward would not be driving with him to Fire. He had to take the train, as usual, and go there, alone. My father would be in the neighborhood, listening to the bug, listening to hear Nostradamus, the one word that would end my nightmare. Edward is on his way there nowI pictured him with his duffle bag, walking quickly to the stairs that would take him underground, to the trains. He loves trains. I feel like I have just been torn apart, and the best part of me is gone. I know its gone. All I can do now is waitand pray. I trust you, Edward. I love you. Come home to me. Fast.

28 EPOV The whole ride over here, on the train, I had tried to remember who I was before Bella. Eyes down, quiet, silent mostlyagree with everything Victoria says. Dont even argue with your eyes. No matter what happens, you submityou accept. Behave. Smile. Dont show defiance. Dont show anger or fear, unless its demanded. I hated coaching myself back to what I was. It felt like the worst kind of cheating on Bella, or Dr. Bella, more correctly. I keep telling myself its only for a few daysits an act. But the sad thing is, I really was this slave only 14 days ago. A subconscious part of me felt likeeven though I had learned some new tricks, I was still that weakling, deep down. No. I am not. I wont be. Perform for a few days and get what you need and then get the hell out of there. You will not become Victorias bitch again. The internal struggle continued as I got to the back alley of Fire.

This is where Emmett found me for the first time. I looked around for a moment, the darkness still smiling overhead. Would it have been better for me to have died out here? Would it have been easier for everyone I know if Id just vanished like that boy? I took out my key and exhaled a breath, sliding the metal into the chiseled lock, turning it with a little jiggle, as usual, and I opened the door. Going inside was making my flesh crawl and right away I knew Id been changed inside. It didnt feel normal or routine to be here, as it used to feel. The dressing room area was dark, all lights turned off. I lifted my tongue a bit inside my closed mouth, feeling the little square there. Be careful. Dont bite down. The dungeon is always locked and only Victoria has the key to that room. Otherwise, I could just sneak in here, enter the dungeon, and get my evidence, and sneak out. But life is never that easy in reality. I silently walked through the dressing rooms, and crossed the red line once more. It almost hissed at me, as if it knew even if Victoria didnt that I wasnt the same and that this time, I hadnt left my heart and soul behind when I stepped across it. I am brining my whole self across you this time, you fucked up line. Katies father is inside the club nowBellas lover is hereIm not just a faceless whore shadow anymore. Im someoneI matter. Im flesh and blood. I am special. I am loved. I dont see Victoria yet. I cant even smell her perfume at the moment. Maybe I got here before her. Maybe shed overslept. Yea, right. For a moment, I pictured Charlie driving around, finding a good place to park where he would not be in sight of the club or anyone around it, the ear bud in place, waiting to hear my most disgraced moments. I still hate that he or anyone has to hear any of this. But I have been humiliated before. The club was dark and empty and the vampire cage alone, hanging from the ceiling, almost smiling at me as if it had missed me. I ignored its gaze and turned right, going down the hallway of private rooms. I dont need light to point the way. I know it by heartand the darkness has always been my frienduntil latelywhen an angel revealed to me the magic of the sunshine. Please forgive me, Bella. I ached as I thought the words, my legs feeling like cement, dragging me every inch of the way. Please hold on. I would die for you, too. I would bleed, scream, beg, starve, and burn for you. Dont give up on me. Hold on. Going down a long staircase, I finally reach the lower basement floors of Fire. This is where the seediest of things occur at Fire. Drugs are purchased down here, mostly in the two rooms on my right hand side. I walk down the hallway, passing the dungeon door, locked and also padlocked, unopened. The door at the end of this dim, cold gray brick hall is the one she calls mine. Its not locked. Nothing special is in here, only me, most of the time. Opening the door, I flick the light on, and the sudden bulb overhead burns bright, stinging my eyes, a blur of blue color in my vision as my eyes close, trying to adjust. The room is not fancy in any way. Gray brick walls, a simple twin sized bed with metal cuffs, two at the head of the bed, two at the foot of the bed. I dont always

sleep restrained, but sometimes. The cuffs must always be there, another of Victorias rules. A black comforter laid on it, neatly made, and I wasnt sure if that was the way I had left it, or if someone had maybe washed it and remade the bed while I was away. I decided it didnt matter and placed my duffle bag on top, knowing it wasnt time to unpack just yet. I was in trouble and nothing else would be done until I received my punishment. I took off my shirt, folding it and placing it on the bed. I kicked off my sneakers, then socks, tucking them into the shoes, shoving them under the bed with my bare feet. I cleared my throat and unbuttoned my jeans, unzipping them, moving them down off my white underwear, lifting one foot to remove them, then the other. I folded them, too, placing them next to my shirt. Now the underwear, whore, my inner slave seethed at me. I told myself to start acting my part and do it. I exhaled again and almost frowned, sliding my fingers down, taking the underwear with them, feeling a slight chill on my ass as I stepped out of the briefs. I folded them, too, and laid them on top of the jeans. Now the fun part. Please forgive me Bella. It seemed like it took me forever to do itbut I knelt on the hard cement floor, letting my head drop down, really feeling true shame already, and aligning my arms behind me, folding them straight and perfectly, making sure my posture was correct. No slouching, no hunching. I wanted to cry. I nearly did. But I kept shouting at myself to be tough, be the way I was, even if its only for show. I tried. And then I tried again. Again. My knees began to feel a little sore but they were used to that. I havent been on my knees to serve for a long time. It was nicefeeling free. I heard her heels clicking on the stairs coming down here and I tensed. I always tense when I first hear Victoria approach. Keep your eyes down. Agree with everything she says. Dont show her your new eyes, the ones Dr. Bella gave us. The ones full of joy and pride and strengthfreedom colored eyes. Hide them away, as all your other valued possessions. She would pluck them out before allowing me to ever keep something so precious. Shes almost here. Shes taking her time, too, always one to like making a grand entrance. I can smell her now. I miss the smell of strawberries and freesia. I miss light. I miss warm quilts and soft pillowsand the quiet. I miss Bellas sleep talking. I want to go home already. I am so fucked. I jumped involuntarily as she spoke suddenly, stealing me away from my warm, fluffy memories. Good morning, Edward., she said, her voice sounding very pleasant. I hadnt seen her yet, all I could see now was the floor below my head. I could now see part of her shoes. Only she would wear four inch heels, and red ones, at 6 am. Answer, she said just as sweetly. Good morning, Victoria., I tried so hard to make my voice sound seductive and smooth, feeling the little square under my tongue again, hoping it wouldnt be long before I could put it in the dungeon and take it out of my mouth.

She walked closer to me, looking me over, I was sure, as she stroked my hair. It didnt feel like an affectionate gesture, it felt more like a stable hand touching a horse, surveying the condition it was in before grooming again. I made myself close my eyes and give a little moan as she touched me. She liked me to crave her, need her, want her touch. I commanded my cock to hardenand it half-cooperated. It seemed to sigh and shrug its shoulders as I felt Victorias fingernails scrape my scalp. Im sorry, Bella. I dont want to use you for something as wrong as this..butI have to picture you now, walking around me, touching me like I was propertya returned DVD. Good boy. I missed you, too., she kept playing with my hair as my moans quieted a bit, Silence. Thank God. Silence can be so easy sometimes. Sometimes not. Suddenly, I remembered my lips with jail bars painted over them and I kept my eyes softly closed, trying to push it away for now. Look at what Raven did to you., she said with a casual voice as she let her hand trail down the back of my neck, her fingers moving down the lines I was wearing there. Her hands were on my ass now as she stood behind me, one foot on each side of my legs as she kneaded the flesh there. My eyes clenched a bit tighter, my jaw felt very tight, too, and my internal coach demanded me to relax right now. Youre undercover, it told me, act your part, damn it. I made myself relax and then Victoria shoved my back, ordering, Down, boy. I was on all fours now, opening my eyes and staring at the floor as she spread my ass cheeks open, examining her pet for traces of damage. She raped you, too., Victoria seemed to know this already and part of me thought maybe she spoke to Raven afterwardsand my paranoia was rising. Did you bleed?, she was roughly examining the opening and added, Answer. No, Victoria., I answered, trying to stop myself from screaming. After a few minutes, she stopped that and grabbed the back of my hair, pulling me up to my knees again, saying, Up, boy. My hands went back in place, folded behind me, as she moved around to my left. Tsk., she clicked loudly, not sounding very happy suddenly, You got fat, slut. I felt her fingers pinch my hip and a small piece of skin was being twisted between her thumb and fingers. I winced but didnt dare yell out or even let out a breath. I kept my eyes down, remembering the snacks at BellasI hadnt worked out enough during my stay there. Shit. Her hand came across my face hard and I felt a gush of air come out of my mouth. Shit! I nearly lost the square bug. I locked my tongue down over it, closing my mouth. Keep your eyes down, I told myself and I obeyed.

You didnt have time to work out?, she asked, slapping my other cheek just as hard as the first. I wasnt given permission to answer. I just had to take it, silently. Her fist tightened in my hair and I could feel her anger then. I used to pride myself on the fact that I did my job and never complained, that I never gave Victoria any trouble. And to think of that now made me want to vomit. I wonder what Bella saw in me when I first came to her, the things I saidthe weakness inside me must have repulsed her. Fucking lazy whore., she muttered, shoving my head, releasing it and letting me bow it down as my position dictated, You eat like theres no tomorrow. No food for two days. You dont deserve my collar., she scolded, standing in front of me now, her hands resting on my shoulders. Thats the first thing shes said thats the truth. Crawl to the dungeon, you useless skank., she seethed as I dropped to hands and knees again, crawling out of my room and down the hallway. I could hear her walking behind me, not saying anything else as I went at medium pace the way she liked me to. I reached the door and remained on all fours as she walked around me, unlocking the two bolts of the dungeon door. She pushed it open and said, In. I crawled into a dark room and waited on all fours as the light went on. Another bright light this time. This room has several lights. A red light, for punishment that is almost pleasurablea dim orange light that is for resting in between sessionsand a harsh white light that only adds to the strain and hides nothing during a particularly rough session. This is the white light. The light I watched Victoria kill in. I didnt need to look up to know what was in here. This room had become as familiar to me as the club. It was a huge, open room with no windows, again gray brick walls adorned with lots of different hooks and shelves, displaying every toy and weapon Victoria owned, years worth of gathered things. There was the X cross in the far corner, covered with a sheet usually, a giant black leather X with metal loops at the end of each corner, a locking belt in the center to hold ones waist in place. A couple of the walls had metal squares in the concrete, with round loops that held chains. There was also a stockade made of cherry wood that Victoria loved that I had to keep up, oiling it and caring for it every day. The cage, too, a tall, round one hanging from the ceiling. And another smaller one in the left corner that I could only lay in or sit in the fetal position in. These were the constants in the dungeon, but there were always new things coming and going from time to time as Victorias moods changed. I had a feeling thered be some new things in here today. I wondered what shed start with first and just how angry she was at me, really. Time would tell. I hadnt been in trouble with her for a long time, most of the times I spent here were painful, but she was playing with me, not upset with me. This was new.

The door closed behind us but I didnt hear her locking it, as usual. Up., she yanked my hair again and I rose to my knees, hands behind me again. You have really displeased me, Edward., she was at the wall, a few feet away, looking over her tools, I had you so well trained. You were perfect. And that little cunt screwed you all up. I frowned and felt my eyes squint in rage. Shes talking about Bella. You fucking bitch! I nearly looked up at her but then the slave inside me, who wanted me to keep playing my part grabbed me by the throat, reminding me what I was trying to accomplish here. Ill have to start again., Victoria sighed, and I heard chains clanging as she walked over to me, coming up behind me. I felt cold metal on my wrists, clicks locking cuffs around them. I heard chains jingle as another metal touched the front of my neck, a padlock clicking into tight place behind me, at the back of my neck. The chain behind me was being pulled again and my neck was forced back until I was looking at the ceiling, another padlock clicked, holding the chains of my collar to the cuffs around my wrists, holding me in this arched back position. I dont like doing this to you, Edward., she moved a finger down my chin and neck. Then she went behind me again and began to place matching metal cuffs around my ankles, and the chain linked to those as well, securing my wrists tight to them. You will come to remember how appealing I am to you again., she said, moving her fingernails over my ass, You will beg for me when you see me again. You will remember how good you have it with me. I doubt it. I felt pretty confidant that nothing she could do to me would really make me feel this way. No pain could really scare me back towards her at this point. And then she called, Come in, Sir Kevin. The dungeon door opened and a tall, muscular man stepped in. He had long, black hair, a slight curl to it, a chiseled model-type face and perfect pecks, washboard abs. He wore no shirt but was adorned with black leather pants, a silver chain looped at his right hip. His boots made wicked clicks against the floor as he looked at me, a smile spreading across his pink lips, revealing perfect white teeth. His skin was so tan with the gray brick wall behind him. He stopped a couple steps inside and crossed his arms, tilting his head and looking me over, not even bothering to hide the fact that his eyes lowered and stayed there for a good long while. Any erection I had then was dead and I felt that, knowing Id be punished for that at some point today. Victoria clutched my hair in back as if to steady me. Sir Kevin, this is Edward., she introduced with a sugary tone. Hello, Edward., he said with a deep, masculine voice, a true smile painted on his lips.

I just let out a breath, praying this wasnt what I thought it was. Victoria wouldnt do that to me. She knows I hate it. More than anything. I told her from the beginningno men. Oh fuck!! Come, Sir Kevin., Victoria invited him closer, You may touch. SHIT!! No, Victoria, DONT do this to me! I wasnt that horrible!! No, she wont do this. Shes trying to scare me. He came forward, not too quickly, moving carefully like I was a baby deer or something. Shhhhits okay, he assured me as he approached, Not gonna hurt you, angel. I let out another breath with thick fear coloring it and Victoria yanked my head back tighter, reminding me to behave myself. He stood in front of me and hesitated as his hand began to rise towards me. I was aware of my breathing now and it wasnt good. They both knew I was panicking and in a big way. I tried to control it.to pull myself together. Relax, baby his voice tried to soothe me as he stepped to my side a little, not wanting to stand over me too dominantly. He truly sounded sincere in his caring tone but maybe he thought I was into this scene. Maybe he didnt know this was a huge, huge punishment for me, one I never wanted to know. I love your hair., he complimented, slowly moving his fingers through the side of my unkempt hair, not yanking or pulling it yet, Sooo soft, too. Very beautiful. I closed my eyes and felt tears pooling inside them as Victoria was talking to Sir Kevin. He is very beautiful., she agreed, Hes usually a very good boy but hes earned a little whipping lately, as you can see. Poor little thing., I heard him reply in sympathy, his soft fingers moving over a couple of lash marks across my back. Clenching my eyes now, I felt the wetness spilling past my eyelashes, finding my face as my body shivered a little violently. Hes never had a man before., Victoria said, As I explained to you. Only toys have been used. If he gives you a hard time, you may inflict some pain. Hes a pain slave so hes used to that. Dont cause any permanent damage. I want him working next week upstairs. And as always, wear a condom. Breaking my tongue free, I heard myself scream out, Victoria, please! She yanked my head back more and gave my mouth a very hard slap. I winced, feeling a throbbing pain there. Hes not allowed to speak!, she yanked my hair again and I thought I tasted blood. I shoved my tongue down over the square bug in my mouth, trying to keep calm enough so I wouldnt lose it or swallow it. But if you want him to, its up to you., Victoria said to Kevin, I dont think hell give you much trouble. Once he gets used to it, hell be fine.

You know me, Victoria., Kevin said, Im not a cruel master. Im very gentle with my subs. I know you are., she sounded like she was smiling, Thats why I chose you to be the first for Edward. Hes my baby and I love him. I hate seeing him hurtbut I decided he needs this. Hes ready. The FIRST?!! As if there would be more men ??!! The only thing more disgusting was hearing her say she loves me. Hes a sweet slave., she talked like I wasnt even here! Worse, like Im some pony who cant understand what theyre saying. Hes afraid., she pointed out as they looked down at my face, which Im sure is tear streaked right now. Its alright., Kevin breathed, the back of his fingers stroking my cheek, feeling the wetness there, Ill be good to him, Victoria. I promise. I know., she said and I closed my eyes, hearing a pained little sound come out of me. Sir Kevin was touching my lips with his thumb and I heard myself panting for air. Let me say goodbye and hes all yours., I heard Victoria say and Sir Kevin walked around behind me, far into the room to give us some privacy. If ever there was a chance to beg like a dog, it was now. Victoria, please, please I breathed, shaking like a leaf now, against my will, Dont do this, PLEASE!! Ill do anything you say, I swear! She ignored my pleas and shut me up by kissing me deeply, her tongue probing inside as I struggled to hold onto the bug under my own tongue. Sir Kevin is very nice., she said after she broke our kiss, You be a good boy for him and Ill see you tonight. I promise. I feel like a kindergartener being left on the first day of school! Please, dont., I pleaded, tears blurring my vision as I left all dignity behind, Im sorry! I love you, Victoria, pleaseplease? I want youI love youI love you so much. Bella, please, please dont listen, dont hate me. I dont mean it, I have to! Ill say anything to escape this!! I was trying to kiss her again, to reach her but she straightened up, smiling down at me as I became a whimpering puppy. I love you, too, Edward., she touched the dent in my chin, Thats why I have to discipline you when youre not behaving. This will be good for you. Remember what you areand who you belong to. When I come back, well talk. No, please, dont leave me, Victoria. Dont leave me here!, I blinked and felt more tears spill out, I clanked my chains as I began to struggle a little, really believing it nowshe was going to leave me with this guy all day! You should thank me Im leaving you with a nice master., she ran her hands down my neck, resting them again on my shoulders, I could have given you to a

mean one. An ugly one. Dont keep begging. Youre making Sir Kevin feel bad. Make me proud. Be a good boy. She backed away a step or two, her eyes staring into mine with desire in them. Again, she looked so aroused it made me sick. She likes seeing the fear, loves seeing me cry like a child, and Ill bet she adored it when I confessed my love for her. And she calls Bella a cunt. Thank me, Edward., she ordered with an angelic voice. I shuddered, wanting nothing more than to drink her blood as I danced around her seizing, dieing body. But I knew if I didnt obey, she could have another man here for me tomorrow. I tried to hide my hatred for her, not sure how good I had done, and panted, Thank you, Victoria. She smiled at me and then looked up, behind me, beaming at Sir Kevin. See?, she asked, Hes really a sweetheart. I felt his fingernails softly moving in large ovals around my shoulder blade behind me as he replied, just as sweetly as she had, Well be fine. Ill go slow. UGH!! This is the one thing I swore would never happen to me. The one nightmare I had managed to escapeuntil now. I tried to cling to my bravery and to recall my words to Bella. If this is what I have to do to be free, for you, for Katie, Ill do it. God, please, strike me dead nowor knock me out or something!! Anything!! Victoria looked at me again and repeated, I love you, Edward. And then she left, closing and then locking the door behind her. I felt myself wonder if Sir Kevin was alright with being locked in here all day, too. Or maybe she gave him a key. I wish I could ask but I couldnt risk it. Besides, I had more terrifying things on my mind. After a minute of silence, I heard Sir Kevin far behind me, giving me a little space to calm down. You can relax, now, your Mistress is gone., he tried to comfort me. Little did he know it wasnt her that bothered me. I didnt answer, knowing no amount of begging to HIM would do me any good. I was screwed and I knew it. Sir Kevin was off on the other side of the room, preparing something I didnt want to see, and something in me told me now was a good time to plant the bug somewhere, when Victoria was gone and no one was looking. But then I thought of Charlie, listening to a day of a man raping me, teaching me how he liked his cock sucked, and hours of depraved shit that Id have to perform through. I cant. I cant let anyone hear this. Im sorry Charlie. I moved the square out from under my tongue and shoved it up onto one of my back teeth. Sorry, Bella. Dont be scared. Ill come out when I have my proof. We dont need a bug.

And I bit down hard, feeling it crack between my teeth and splinter as I bit down again and swallowed the tiny fragments down. Suddenly, his voice was right behind me and when he spoke, I jumped slightly. You dont have to be afraid of me, Edward., he said, softly, his hands massaging my shoulders, his lips hot against my shoulder blade as I tensed, wincing, trying to control my quick breathing. I like you., his voice floated like mist behind me and he slowly moved around me, standing in front of me as his eyes seemed to dance over my face. His fingers slowly traced over my lips as I heaved out the air from my lungs. You are so beautiful., he said, sounding as if he meant it, Your eyesyour skinyour nose He ran a playful finger down my nose and dotted it on the tip as I jerked backwards, not able to really go anywhere with my cuffs and chains holding me into position. This guy doesnt seem like some evil, sick rapist type. But still, he knows I dont want this but hes here anyway. Hes just trying to soften his attack with nice words and tender fingers. That just makes it worse. Id rather get punched bloody in the face and taken that way. At least its more honest. This guy acts like were soul mates or something. Your mouth, he touched my lips again with his thumb and added, So soft. Such a kissable mouth He leaned down and opened his lips, about to touch mine with them but I jerked my head away, feeling the pull of the chains behind my neck, cringing in pain as they pulled with my struggle. No, no, Edward he warned gently, rubbing the area beneath the collar, Dont hurt yourself struggling. We dont have to kiss yet if you dont want to. I understand. I was a slave, too, Edward., he shared, his hands stroking me as I quivered more noticeably, I know what it is to suffer. I dont want to hurt you, angel. I just want to please youand receive pleasure from you, if you want to give it. Im patient. Im gentle. And I want you. Youre so gorgeous, Edward. Do you know that? I blinked again, and my eyes betrayed my crumbling tough glare. Tears again. I wish this guy was gross and disgusting and would just do it and get it over with. But Im sure this was what Victoria had in mind. A slow, drawn out day of pure shit, a soft lover who just rubbed it in my face, telling me he cared and found me so beautiful. This was her version of a sick joke. And I was the brunt of it. Please dont cry., he said, cupping my face and leaning in, kissing my tears, I promise not to hurt you. Dont cry.

EPOV

I closed my eyes as my forehead rested on the bars of my cage and heavy tears trailed down my face from both eyes this time, the soft orange light keeping me company as I tried to forget my day. Then, the boys face came to my mindhe was cryingand screaming and bleeding. I made my mind refocus and concentrate on the whole reason I was doing this. What right did I have to sit here in this cage, crying and feeling sorry for myself when he had paid the ultimate price in this very room? I had to make it right. TanyaIm so sorry for treating you the way I did. I know you were doing your best. Please help Bella now, dont watch anything thats happening to me. Comfort Bella. Help her focus on her classes and her work. Keep her safe. Keep her far away from here. Sir Kevin had left me about an hour ago. He had informed me it was about dinnertime and that hed try to get me something to eat. I had not seem him since. I roughly rubbed my lips again, trying to rid myself of his taste, the smell of his cologne still all over me, the calm, caring sounds of his voice still mocking me in my mind. I clutched my hair tight, sniffing as I noticed my legs were still shaking. Stop., I said aloud to them, putting a hand on my thigh. I could hear the padlock outside and then the other lock being opened and I wiped my eyes with two fast hands, not wanting to hear her taunts about being in here, crying, after my blind date with Sir Kevin. Its going to take a lot of acting to make her feel that I dont hate her after today. The white light went on as my eyes clenched, blinded from the sudden glare. Victoria came inside and closed the door behind her, holding a roll and a bottle of water, smirking at me as if she was bringing me a four star dinner. I kept my eyes down, praying to someone anyone for help remaining on my course. I have to play nice now. I have to be in love with this world class Queen of the Bitches. Howre you doing, doodlebug?, she asked, feigning concern. Doodlebug? Fuck you! Im alright., I lied, keeping my eyes on my legs as she neared the right side of my cage. Eat, sweetie., she offered the roll and I took it without looking at her. I couldnt. If I do, Ill tear her throat out and be trapped in here for who knows how long? Thank you, Victoria., I did my best to sound grateful for the roll and then she handed me the water bottle. I ate the roll, trying to take tiny bites after her comment about how I eat like a pig and Im so fat bullshit. I just look healthy and not bony and that drives her god damn nuts. No butter on the roll. God, I hate you, Victoria. I hope I get to see you eat bread and water when youre in your orange prison uniform. Does anything hurt?, she was looking at me, feeling sorry for me now? God I want to tell her to go fuck herself so badly. No., I lied.

Who do you belong to, Edward?, she crossed her arms, raising a brow. You, Victoria., I kept my eyes on my roll, not putting much emotion into the words. Say you love me., she smiled. I love you, Victoria., I half lifted my eyes to hersthen sank them back down into my cage. She came closer to the bars of my cage and said, Look at me, Edward. I raised my eyes all the way up to hers now and she stared back at me, thick sympathy in her eyes. I know youre hurtand upsetand in shock., she said, And I dont blame you. I dont want to punish you that way ever again. But you did deserve it. Im not as stupid as you might think, Edward. Eat your dinnerand Ill come back later. I have to get upstairs, the club is opening soon. Take a little nap after you eat. I drank all the water in the bottle after the roll was gone and right away I scolded myself for that. I would have to piss later and Im sure that would be used against me as a punishment, too. What if something was in that water? Something to put me to sleep and when I wake up, Ill be in Ravens basement? Oh God, no. Stay awake! Dont fall asleep! What if the water was fine and Im just torturing myself for no reason? I wonder if Emmetts upstairs. I hope Bella didnt call him after my bug broke. He cant come in here, he has no key. I hope he doesnt try to come near here. Hell get in trouble. I began to think up different ways of killing Victoria and before I knew it, I was curled up in the bottom of the cage, wishing I had a blanket, smiling to myself as I poured gasoline over a tied up Victoria, listening to her beg me for her life as I waited, playing with my lighter, letting her think about it for awhile before I moved to click the lighter on. I even drifted off to sleep a few times but the light was too bright. I wish the red light would go on or all the lights would just go off completely, letting me have a wonderful black void. In this world, it would be a blessing to be blind. I dont know how much time had passed, but after an eternity, I heard the locks being opened again. I moved to sit up in the cage, rubbing my eye and wincing at my sore muscles. They had gotten used to soft beds at night, of warmth and not curling doubled over while I slept. Bella Swan had spoiled me rotten. Bella Swanseemed like eons away from me nowlike Venus. Wakey, wakey, sleepy head., Victorias voice was nearby as my eyes rose up a bit, and she was there, opening my cage, walking away from it, towards the other end of the vast room, ordering, Come out, kneel in the center. Time to perform for my owner. I crawled out of the cage and kept moving on all fours to the middle of the room, raising my hands off the floor and folding them tight behind me, kneeling there, making sure my posture was right. Eyes down. In my heart, I wanted to leap up and grab her from behind, savagely squeeze her throat with my arm as I demanded my blood sample and then locked her in the

cage. But Victoria would die first. She was smart but also psychotic. She wouldnt listen to reason or see that she was trapped. Shed enjoy the fight. Shed win and Bella would pay. Katie would pay. Just wait, I told myself. You will have your moment. Be patient. Was Sir Kevin good to you, Edward?, she asked as she walked closer to me. Yes, Victoria., I replied, trying not to sound so dead inside, wishing shed just let me try to forget it, wishing shed stop playing with me on this subject. He was very pleased with you., she was petting my hair and I tried to make myself act as if I enjoyed her touch. I closed my eyes and leaned my head a bit into her hand, giving a small mmmmmm sound. He offered to buy you from me., she chuckled, What do you think about that, pet? Pleaseno, I breathed, I want to be yours. I dont want to belong to anyone else. I love you, Victoriamy Mistress Please let her believe that, I dont know if I delivered that line very successfully, but I felt her fingers on my cheek and I laid it on thicker, daring to make my lips cover her hand with kisses. She let her hand remain there, receiving my attention as I began to lick her thin fingers, kissing the warm, wet digits before me. What about your girlfriend?, she sneered jealously above me as I kept kissing the other side of her hand now. I dont have a girlfriend, Im your slave. Your slave forever., I poured it on, hoping I wasnt going too over the top. I dont know, Edward., she said, unconvinced, You looked pretty damn happy with that girl last weekand you defied me to protect her. I think you like her too much. No., I heard my voice lower and deepen as I began to tell the darkest lies I could, I was working. I dont care about her. She couldnt even fuck properly, I had to teach her everything. Im tired after two weeks with her. She was a whiny little brat. Skinny little college nerd. I couldnt wait to come home. I missed you so much, Victoria. Please She took a step or two away from me, making me stop in mid-kiss as her hand disappeared from my mouth. I hope she believed my rant about Bella. I didnt want Bella ever to be in any danger of feeling the wrath of Victoria. Why did you step in front of her that night, Edward?, she took something off the wall and was strolling back over to me. Her father is a police chief., I answered quietly, I didnt want to risk losing you. I was afraid youd get caught and arrested. That sounds reasonable, right? It needs a little more. She also told me that her father has hurt suspects before., I added, He does whatever he likes with people that piss him off. He shot one man in the hand during an interrogation. I was protecting you, Victoria.

Hmm., she just answered as she began pinching my right nipple, bending down and licking it, biting it as I hissed out. Then she opened a silver nipple clamp that had alligator teeth in them and let the teeth close around my hardened nipple. I gave a low groan, closing my eyes, handling the familiar pain, used to this type of anguish. I didnt struggle or make any more noise as she licked my left nipple now, biting mercilessly until it was standing up, erect, ready for its clamp. I felt the metal teeth bite and I sucked in a breath, holding it. Better., she said, looking me over and then I felt a little zap of electric. Not muchjust enough to jerk my body in surprise. She laughed and kissed my forehead, as if she was sorry for playing some little joke on me. Kiss me., she looked down and her lips were right above mine. I devoured her mouth, rising upon my knees as much as possible as my tongue lapped at hers and my wet kiss worked hard to inhale her inside. I closed my eyes and imagined Bellas breastsher cute little ass that blushed when she did. I felt my cock harden like a servant of her image and felt relieved. I have to convince Victoria of my loyalty again. I have to make her feel that I love her. I have to get her trust back. I dared to speak, hoping I wouldnt be punished too hard for it. Theres only you, Victoria., I whispered and groaned as I kissed her, I ache, thinking that I displeased you. I dont want anyone else. Just you. Hurt me.rape mestarve medo anything as long as you want. Just dont let me gopleasekeep me. I would die without you. I have to be careful, I think Im going too far now. But then I heard Victorias voice moan and realized shes liking it. I felt the jolts of electricity again and I moaned out, licking my tongue along Victorias bottom lip, closing and sucking my lips over it. You will work hard to make me forgive you, yes?, she nuzzled my nose with hers. Yes, VictoriaGod, yes!, I pleaded. Youre the best pet Ive ever had., she kissed my lips and had her hands in my hair, I love you, Edward. I love you, Victoria., I whispered, returning her kiss. Im sorry I had to give you to Sir Kevin today., she said in my ear. I deserved it., I said quickly, I dont want to forget how lucky I am. To be yours is my life. Thank you for caring enough to show me that. I could hardly say the words without retching but I think I delivered them well. Victoria reached down and found my massive erection, curling her hand around it, under the head. My horse., she smirked as she pumped it in her hand.

I groaned, wincing slightly as I dropped my eyes to it, feeling another little jab of metallic shock into my nipples. That just made me harder as she worked my cock roughly. Youre not allowed to cum., she warned, Youre not out of the doghouse yet, boy. Yes, Victoria., I closed my eyes, thinking of nuns and Sir Kevins fingers in my mouth.

BPOV Today had to be the worst day of my entire life. And Ive had some pretty fucked up days before. After two and a half hours of crying, Rosalie and Alice pulled my ass off my kitchen floor and made me go take a shower. And then as I stood there, naked, under the hot water pouring over me, I sobbed for another 30 minutes as I tried to wash. I kept seeing wet Edward before me, washing my body, kissing my kneecaps. Youve been neglected, Bella.but Im here now. Bella, dont make me come in there., Alice warned through the door. Whats happening to him now? Is he screaming now? Bleeding? Afraid? How the fuck can I go to school or even take a shower, forgetting for one second that hes being tortured right now?!! How did he think Id really be able to function in these next few days?!! He must think Im made of steel or something. I wanted to call Emmett but Edward made me promise not to do that unless it was an absolute emergency. Emmett is as trapped by Victoria as Edward is at the moment. I wanted to call my dad and ask him whats happening to Edward now. But then I was so afraid to know. Then I told myself I should know. I am his doctor, after all. I should be brave and face it. But then Id start crying all over again. I dont even remember the walk to school. I think Rosalie just pulled my arm the whole way and I just followed like a dumb sheep. I sat there, in classes, like a coma victim. I didnt hear a word any of my professors said. I feel dead. Only worse. The dead have peace. I dont. Rosalie and Alice hung out with me after school at my apartment and they stayed for dinner, ordering us our usual pizza everything on it. I avoided my bedroom as I took a couple bites, not talking, staring into space, imagining what could be happening to him now. Im sure I was no fun at all for my friends but I couldnt even make myself care. Alice mentioned after dinner that we were going to have a sleepover tonight, in my bed. She tried to make it sound fun, as if we were all teenagers again. But I quickly squashed that idea, saying I really just wanted to be alone. Im not sure if they were hurt or not, but after what seemed like a thousand years, they were hugging me and saying, See you tomorrow, Bells.

They waited on the other side until they heard me lock everything and even put the chain across the door. Like that would stop anyone who wanted to get me. I almost wish she would have someone come get me. Id rather be hurt beside Edward than to remain here, desperately worried and in the dark without him. I have to face it. Okay, Bella. Take a deep breath. Go into your room. I went into the dark room and clicked on my little bedside lamp, noticing some things on my made bed, upon the white, blue and pink quilt Edward loved to snuggle in. I sat on the bed, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear as I looked over the items. The friendship ring I gave him. The bear claw necklace. A little slip of paper that read Love is the best medicine for a broken heart. And there was a little piece of paper, a page torn out of my notebook. I opened it and read: Bella, Please guard my most prized possessions. And please also look after my heart. Ive left it here with you. I love you forever. Edward. Great, just when I thought I couldnt cry anymore. Here I go again. With shaking hands, I put the ring on my middle finger, like a wedding ring. I put the necklace on, hoping it would bring me courage and bear like power. I read his short note again and smiled, loving him even more. I turned it over, glancing, and saw my own handwriting there. I adore you., it said. I remember writing this the day I was listening to him sing in the shower. The Music of the Night. Beneath my words was Edwards writing again. Right back at you, Dr. Bella. I fell asleep crying that night, holding my note as I stared at Edwards fortune, my finger lightly moving over it again and again. I hope the statement is true. Now I have a broken heart. And only Edward can bring the medicine I need. Ill try to be brave and wait. He waited years before I found him. I had called Charlie a couple times and left messages. He never answered his cell phone and I hated that. Youd think him being a cop hed know better. He knew I was going crazy worrying. He could call me!! I was fuming at him for hours and it wasnt until 2am that I received a text message from him. Evrythng OK Dont worry. Call u tomorrow. Dad Thats it?! Everythings ok?! You prick!! My dads probably enjoying listening to him suffer. No, thats not right. I know hes not like that. Hes just trying to ease my mind. I wish hed just tell me the straight truth.

I closed my eyes and knew Edward would never hear me or my thoughts. But I sent them to him anyway. Edward. I miss you so much. I love you. I hope youre not in any pain. I hope youre sleeping. I hope youre warm. I hope youre comfortable. I hope youre not afraid. I hope you know youre not alone. You were right. We are together, always. Im with you, suffering right along with you. You will never be alone in anything ever again. I am with you. Even in HellI am with you. I will never leave you. Good night, Freed Eagle. Sleep now, my only love.

EPOV I growled deeply as she kept riding on it, not having any mercy for my jaw or face as she slammed down harder and harder with each bounce. I was laid out on the padded leather table, my wrists cuffed at my sides and my ankles trapped at the bottom of the table, spread wide apart. My nipples still wore their metal clips and now I also had one biting into my balls and a couple on my inner thighs. Every so often Id get a little shock from every clip at once. And now that Victoria was having fun, there was no way to predict their pattern. I think shed just randomly hitting the controller any way her fingers fall on it now. Sometimes it would be a little jolt, a prickling of heatother times it would be pure fire, long bursts of violent heat coursing through my body. I held a vibrating black dildo end in my mouth, the other end pointed high up over my face as she moved up and down around it, holding a soft handle that dangled from the ceiling to support her weight as she kept fucking it, not allowing my own penis that pleasure as I was still being punished. This was a way for her to rub it in my face that I could fuck her somehow but not experience any of the pleasure of it myself. Truly, it was the easiest thing Ive had to do all day. Besides a hurting jaw, I didnt mind this. I didnt have to fuck her and that was perfect for me. And the shocksa welcome treat after the day I had with Sir Kevin. I growled and grunted as I tried to hold the dildo in place, the vibrating of it making my teeth feel numb. She was screaming and jerking with spasms as she came all the way down on the plastic penis, her wet lips right above my full mouth as I closed my eyes and waited for her to finish her orgasm. After a couple minutes, she lifted herself off of the slick, shiny penis and sighed happily as she looked down at me, still holding it, not moving until I was instructed to do so. My eyes looked at her, trying to convey desire. Wow., she breathed, straddling my chest and sitting her moist pussy on me. She took hold of the dildo with the tips of her fingers, and said, Open. I obeyed and she pulled it out of my sore mouth, keeping it in her hand as she said, Let me see the teeth.

I felt like an animal as I put my teeth together and let her examine them. She touched them carefully and said, Open up. Then she looked around at my back teeth for a couple minutes more. Good., she said, Your teeth cost me a small fortune. I kissed her, acting hungry for her as she broke away after a minute. Open., she said again and I obeyed as she turned the dildo around, Suck. I moaned as the plastic head grazed the back of my tongue, her hand driving the cock hard inside. The thick taste of Victoria coated my tongue as I licked around the plastic shaft as she moved the dildo deep in and then almost all the way out as I sucked greedily and wetly on it. Yes, she smiled down at me as I gave a muffled sound of pleasure, gagging a bit when she pushed the head to my limit and then venturing a bit further, testing me. Did you suck Sir Kevin this way?, she taunted, and I felt rage starting to build up in me again. Its one thing she had a man attack me and have his way with me all day today, but now she was joking and teasing me about it. Mmmmm., I said, as my response. I jerked again, my body feeling hot fire flying through my veins as she moved the dildo faster in and out of my well lubricated mouth as my lips clung to the shaft. Oooh, so pretty, she commented, watching my face closely, I wish I had a cock you could suck on. You dont? I was slurping on it and suddenly it was jerked out of my mouth and replaced by Victorias red pussy that covered my mouth and almost blocked my nostrils. I gave a little noise of discomfort as my tongue moved furiously inside her wet folds, hoping shed allow me air if I pleased her. Shed just cum, so it shouldnt be hard to do this quickly. She rose up and turned around, sitting on my face as she looked down on my chest now, twisting the nipple clamp cruelly as her ass covered my eyes and nose, my mouth getting a sliver of air now and then as I wiggled my tongue wetly against her. Mmmmm yes, baby., she panted, opening one nipple clamp and removing it as I screamed out into her lips, the sudden release brought a rush of blood and wicked pain with it. I tried to quell my screams but she stroked my throbbing nipple, licking her fingers and stroking them harder, helping to ease the pain a bit. There you go, sweetie., she soothed, Shhhh.good boymy baby. She sucked and licked the nipple and my screams quieted. I returned to focus on my job and lapped my tongue in deeper, hearing her gasping and grinding against my mouth. I needed more air so I started nibbling any soft area I could reach.

Moving her hands to the other nipple clamp, I heard myself whimper, anticipating the pain about to come when she tore this one off next. I know, I know, she cooed, Be brave. She opened the clamp and I roared out, feeling my fists balling up tightly at my sides, a clang of the chains as I jerked my wrists and tried to pull my feet up off the table. I was growling and roaring as she kissed my lower torso and I felt her mouth on the head of my cock, licking and swirling hot wetness around it. I shouldnt., she said, But Im too soft on you. And she was sucking my hard cock, trying to ease the pain of my nippleand then I felt her flicking the one attached to my balls. MMMMM!!!, I moaned and wordlessly begged with pathetic noises at the same time, MMMMMM!!!! She was sucking me in deeper and moved faster up and down me as she opened the teeth and I arched my entire back up, lifting her with me as I hollered and tensed, feeling my ass hit the leather and then jerking up again. I felt wetness in my eyes as I swallowed up a gulp of air, then got right back to twirling my tongue and licking up the sides Victoria was massaging and working my balls with one hand as I began to calm down and reach my tongue down, searching for the clit, Victorias favorite spot. I wanted her off me but I almost forgot there were a couple more clips on my inner thighs. She stopped sucking my cock, and I frowned internally, knowing she wouldnt give me any release since Id been bad. Hold on, pet., she whispered, touching the next clamp, Itll all be over soon. From your sick mouth to Gods fucking ears. I waited and then came the immediate wave of pain again. I was glad she was allowing me to scream. I hollered out without words, bucking my hips, hoping it would dull the intense pain. No moreGod, pleaseno more tonight. But I knew there would be more. There always was, with Victoria. This was just day one.

29 EPOV My legs are so fucking sore. I try again to flex them, bending each of them up behind me, using my hand and holding for a few secondsthen the other. Thats a little better. But I walk a couple more steps, feeling the jerk of the chain stop me again. I turn and take a step or two the other way, not wanting to keep walking but its better than just standing in one spot. Keep the blood flowing. Walk.

I can feel the drool from the sides of my mouth and its traveled all the way past my neck and onto my chest now. It must be hours since Victoria left me here alone. Or maybe it just seems like it. My aching jaw throbs again, reminding me of the black rubber ball holding my lips open. Its tightly in place near the back of my mouth and the chain coming out of the ball is linked to something overhead that allows me to pace back and forth a few steps in the center of the room, but not letting me touch anything I could see. The evidence I needed was far out of reach right now, even though I had my hands and legs free. Without thinking, my fingers touched the thin chains that dug into my cheeks too tightly, making imprints into the flesh, connecting behind my neck with a nice heavy padlock. I heard myself give a whimper as I again tried to get my fingers under the chains across my face, even if only to massage the skin and muscles underneath that were also not enjoying their tight restraints. Still no use. I even tried to suck my cheeks in and do it but that didnt work, either. I shouldnt even be trying to get it off. If I do and cant get it back on when she comes back, Im dead meat. So Im gagged and the gag is secured above me. I cant even look down if I wanted to. I can look straight ahead and up, but nothing lower than that. I cant lay down, I cant sit down, cant even kneel, not that I want to. Im so tired. I didnt sleep all night and I think its the next day now. I tried to get to the wall, maybe I could lean on it. That didnt work either. Cant reach the walls. DAMN! All I can do is stand and walk. And my stomach can gurgle. Thats about it. Victoriashe could make me suffer even when shes not here. Shes probably sleeping right now at homeor shopping. A lot of her punishments are like this. Nothing that will hurt me physically, nothing that will show on the outsideonly inside. Starvationdifficult positions to endure for hours alonehumiliation. I hope no more male doms are in my future. I wont let it happen to me twice. Ill struggleIll fight to the death before that happens to me again. Charlies probably so pissed off at me right now. I wonder what hes doing. Dont come in here, Charlie. Dont. Dont tell Bella, either. Shes probably worried enough right now. The chain jerks again and I turn, taking my exhausted steps as the locked door smirks at me now, mighty and mocking at my nude slave body, completely free except for the gag and chains, yet as trapped as a rat in his cage. I rub my eyes, wishing they didnt hurt so much from lack of sleep. I close them, my steps memorized by my chain as I almost sleep walk. Enjoy this time to yourself, my mind says, its better than having Victoria here. Well, thats true. But I would give anything to lay down for a few minutes, even if its on the hard floor. Im thirsty. And hungry. And Ill have to piss in awhile. Ill have to go on the cement floor if she doesnt come soon. And Ill get punished for that, too. Just like she wants. I had to drink that whole bottle of water right down. God, Im stupid. And Im so god damn sick of walking back and forth here!! This is enough to drive me insane!! I bet I wont see her all day. I just have to endure it. Until the next fun position she puts me in.

I tried to exercise my arms a little, instead of letting them hang there like sausages, I stretched myself from side to side, arching my back a few times, massaging my thigh muscles and calves as best I could, what I could reach. God, how much longer?!! I feel like Ive been in here for DAYS, walking back and forth like a trapped animal!! I heard myself starting to growl and groan out loud, voicing my displeasure and discomfort. And again, I start to yank and pull hard on the chains digging into the sensitive corners of my mouth, almost cutting into my cheekbones as I shout out and give up again, not getting any relief at all, my fists curling at my sides as I begin to take bigger, more angry steps, shortening each pace before I must turn and continue it again. I even fantasized with the idea of grabbing the chain coming out of the ball in my mouth and yanking it down as hard as my weight would allow. But no, I cant let there be any evidence of my doing that when she comes back in. I cant even show her my anger and yell at her. I hate that most of all. I picture the scene in my head, myself, freed of the gag as the taste of blood from my lip corners replaces the dry emptiness that was there before. She smirks at me, waiting for my soft, affectionate voice. But she doesnt get it. Instead, I shout, Thanks for the fucking rest, BITCH! She glares and lunges her arm, a whip coming at me. I catch it in my hand, feeling the cut and the wet blood across my palm, but Im used to pain. I curl it around her neck and spin her back to my chest. She gasps and instantly tenses as I close the whip around her thin, snake neck and cut off her air. Her perfect fingernails claw behind her at me but Im out of her reach. DIE you cunt!, I growl into her ear, the last words shell ever hear, DIE!! My eyes open as I come to, the chain jerking again, making me turn slowly and begin again. I feel like I may fall down soon if I have to keep this up. A couple knocks tap on the door and I turn my head, my brow creasing at the sound. Whos knocking here? Its daytime. The club should be empty now. I wait, to see if it happens again. Maybe I am losing my mind. The knock sounds again, a bit louder. Edward?, a mans voice is out there, Its Emmett! RRRRRRR!!!!, I call back, muffled in the gag, but even I can hear the desperate shout in my voice. Fuck! I turn towards the door and walk until I cant anymore. I am so far from the door. My hands go to the back of my head again, uselessly playing with the padlock imprisoning me. I whimper and give up again. Gagged, huh?, he asked, knowing only too well. MMMMMM!!!!, I tried to sound less pained than before.

Alright., he said, Hands free? I tried to say yes but with the ball in my mouth it came out as MMMSSSSS I cant reach anything. Sometimes Id tap on the cage if I was in it and gagged. Two taps for yesone for no. This was not the first time Emmett checked on me in here while Victoria was away. I clapped twice, loudly, relieved that at least we could communicate somehow. I wanted to tell him not to risk getting caught but Im sure he wasnt. He was smart and knew Victoria even better than I did. Good., his voice said clearly, Are you alright? I clapped twice, saying yes. I was going crazy and sore, but basically, I was okay. I heard him jerking on the padlock and giving the door an angry kick and he was saying, I wish I could get in there, man. Im sorry. Did she give you anything to eat? I clapped once. Well, I had a stale roll but that was yesterday. Bitch!, he seethed outside, kicking the door again. I clapped once. No, Emmett! Dont kick the door or damage it, shell see! Just go back upstairs, Ill be alright. He quieted out there and I heard him breathing a little heavier. He really sounded upset that I was being punished. Hes really a great friend. I feel a little better, knowing theres someone this close who cares, even if he cant get in. Hang in there, Edward. Ill try to come back later., he said, sounding as if he wished he could give more, but it was enough. It gave me strength. It kept me going. And I walked again. He didnt say anything about Bella. I guess she didnt call him. Good. I wonder what Charlie is doing out there now. I hope he doesnt try to come in here somehow.

Charlies POV Alright the bug is dead. Deal with it. Watch the club. It looks like Victoria, the red headed woman Edward told me about had left early this morning, and there had been no one going in or coming outuntil now. A tall, dark haired guy. I took some notes. Cropped black hair, large build, muscular. A dancer maybe. Most likely. This could be the kid they described to me asEmmett, my notes said. Edward considers this guy a friend. Hes the only one in there now, besides Edward. Maybe Id see some action here soon. Maybe hed free Edward. He was in the dungeon, most likely. I checked the garbage and dumpsters and they were all body free. Edwards chip still located him here in the club, so he must be in there. This guy going in is probably there to check on Edward, make sure hes alright. I hope hes not coming in to torture Edward, maybe get some information out of him.

Time to take a walk around the back of the club and make sure no ones coming out that way. I use the neighborhood streets to sneak me around that side of the club. My cell phone vibrates again. I look at it as I walk and see Bellas name. Again? Damn it, Bella, Im trying to work a case here. Alone, with no backup or relief. I know you care for this kid, but please, let me do my job. I hate lying to her and saying everythings fine. She can see right through that one. She has before. If something doesnt happen tomorrow to give me some clue as to whats going on in there, Ill have to tell her the truth. And find a way in. If anything happens to this kid, shell never forgive me. I have to pay attention and be patient. I cant talk now, Bella. I dont answer my phone again, leaving her in the dark. I wish I had a beer right now. But, no, Im on duty. Doesnt this place have a mans night or something? I could be a customer, although I dont know if I could make myself look glad about seeing a bunch of guys grinding their junk onstage. Maybe I can put on a leather vest and ask the dark haired dancer about that. I could appear to be new in town, just curious. But then, I notice something strange as I walk down Brewster Avenue, towards the back of the club. I squint, my cop senses picking up somethingand I walk towards himready to proceed with cautionready to ask a couple questions.

BPOV Im in class and again, my father has chosen not to answer my call. I hate you, Charlie! No, I dont. But Im pissed as Hell at you!! Tell me SOMETHING, DAMN YOU !! Im in Psych class, listening to Edwards voice on tape one session one. We are all silently reviewing our subjects tapes, taking notes on what we hear now as they play. I remember that first dayafter he almost left my place, after finding out that I wanted to study him, and after we agreed to both having equal time with each other.his words were in my heart, stillalways. I am ready, Dr. Bella. he said with a calm voice, You may have your way with my brainand later, my body. Although I think you may enjoy one more than the other. He snickered, peeking at me like a little boy. I couldnt help smiling at him, even in my memories his laugh is wonderfuland I can see that facehe is so cute when he laughs. Alright. I began, hitting the record button and saying, Edward Cullen Session One. Just Edward. He said firmly, Edwardokay? His eyes did not look insulted, just asking.

Alright, Edward Session One. I corrected, It bothers you when I use your last name? I dont have a last name when Im working. He still used a nice voice, staring up at the ceiling. Family issues. Do you have a family? I asked. He closed his eyes and I could tell he already was having a hard time. No, I landed here in a spaceship when I was three. He said, dripping with sarcasm. Edward I almost grinned. My parents knew my planet was going to explode so they put me in this little ship he continued, smirking a little, his eyes glancing at me. I had to be patient and understanding with him. I was trying. Avoidance. I waited, not saying anything until he decided to speak again. He still had my check in his back pocket. I wanted to bring that up but then I didnt. I had to let him come to me. Yes I had a family. He said quietly, his eyes closed again. Had I repeated, What happened to them? Nothing. He gave a little sigh, I meanI dont know. I dont see them anymore. That didnt surprise me. Do they know aboutyou working at Fire? I asked, wishing this sounded more like a real conversation and not me just firing questions at him. This is why I needed these assignments. I had to get better at this. Practice would be the only way to do it. No. he kept his eyes closed, I dont think so. I started working there after I lost contact with them. Hmm. Something else broke him away from his family. Interesting. Edward I liked using his name, I wanted him to feel comfortable talking to me, What was it that caused you to stop talking to your family? Can I ask yousome questionsafter I answer one of yours? he looked over at me, those eyes of hiscould I really say no to anything he wanted? Is that professional? Patients dont get to ask their doctors personal questions. Please? he added. I stopped the tape and was back in the present, without him, and tears were rolling down my face. This is where I had crossed the line, the line between just being an observer to being his friend, loving himletting him inside meas I tried to reach inside of him. It was professionally wrong. But even now, I cant regret

it. Hes different now. But is he better off for it? Hes in a dungeon right now, having terrible things done to him! What have I done? I let him go! And why wont my father call me back?!! What if something horribles happened to him? My turn. Edward was saying on the tape now, and I remembered him as he smiled at me, looking me up and down. Okay. I answered, sounding nervous. Have you ever had an orgasm? his voice blurted out. And as I heard it I laughed out loud, the tears still in my eyes as I heard my shocked reaction back then. God! I gasped, sounding like a school marm. Whatdya know? Edward changed me, too. I didnt even recognize that womans voice. That is so not me anymore. And Im glad. What? he asked innocently, Its a yes or no question, I thought that was an easy one. An easy one. Yes, seeing him going back to his world, now I can see that these once so difficult questions of his were very easy and light, compared to the truth of Carlisle and Esme, his daughter, his wife, Victoria. James walked by me and laid a paper face down on my desk, going to the next student and placing one on his desk. I looked around, he was handing us back our quizzes from last week, before I took my couple days off. I didnt feel like looking. Id rather listen to Edwards fun, free banter, myself playing the part of tightly wound therapist to his sexy, irreverent toy. But I sighed and turned it over anyway, curious as to how I did. A red A was at the top right corner of the page underlined and beneath the red line was a little note from him. We need to talk. Meet me at Moes Pizza tonight 10pm. I frowned but didnt look at him. I remembered his showing up at my apartment with coffee. If this was some kind of attempt at a date, Id crush his nuts into the pepperoni. But maybe he wanted to talk about school. The classroom is the place for that, not Moes Pizza. I folded the quiz and tucked it into my folder, hitting the play button, going back to Edwards voice.

EPOV I groaned as my leg cramped again, the weak tears spilling out of my eyes again as I kept walking, even though it had been hours upon hours of this. My lip was bleeding and I liked the taste of it. It was better than rubber. Earlier, my legs gave out and I let myself fall to the floor. My lower legs leaned against the floor as I hung there, the chains digging into my skin, cutting the corners of my mouth as I screamed out, staring straight up, my entire weight being pulled on the single chain over me, jingling its laughter at my pain.

I had to pull myself upon my feet again, my hands holding the chain coming out of my mouth to yank my tired legs up, wobbly but standing. I just stood for awhile, forgetting the fucking walking back and forthback and forth. I stood, feeling my legs quivering and my body complaining, wanting restwanting sleepwanting to lay downjust for one moment. And still no one came. I felt so weak I thought Id pass out. Im so hungry. I need water. I need this fucking ball out of my mouth!! I keep drooling and I dont even try to wipe it away anymore. I dont give a fuck anymore. I want to scream for Emmett, pride be damned. But I cant. Hell try to get in here if he thinks Im hurt and hell end up in here with me for it. Against my will, and disgusting myself, I hear my voice whimper, Victoria. Its muffled but I can understand me. And I feel like a traitor, saying her name, wanting her to come. Right now, while Im in here, she is God. She is water. She is food. She is rest. She is life. She rules. And I hate it. I hate her. And againI want her dead. What time is it? What day is it? Have I been here two daysor three? Is it just one? Please, Victoria, please, give me a little water!! Ill beg you, if you like that. My throat is so dry. Its sandpaper. Another eternity passes. Im walking again, my eyes getting drowsiermy legs clumsier. My arms start to wrap themselves around my chest, and Im not sure why. I need to be held, maybe. I miss Bellas arms. KatherineBella.KatieTanyaplease, Tanya, you can come in here and save me. You can. Please forgive me and take me out of here. I hear metal and locks clicking. I almost cried just from the sheer joy of the sound and that it meant someone was coming in here. I dont care who it is, the door is opening! God, yes! Thank you! When Victorias face enters the room Im groaning and shivering as my arms cling to me, Im not sure how my eyes looked to her but I couldnt even bother to disguise what I was feeling at the moment. Exhaustion, relief, happinesshunger, rage? She had a bottle of water and a little brown bag in her hand and I lunged forward, wanting that bottle with all my heart. I yelled out, feeling the chain remind me of my limitations and I winced, panting without shame as I clutched the chains digging into my cheekbones, growling in pain. That wasnt a good idea, was it?, she smiled affectionately at my anguish, as if shed just left me five minutes ago. I roared out louder, sounding very hostile and angry and not giving a shit as violently struggled my headand then I gave that up and I glared at her. She stopped in her tracks and glared right back at me.

This is how you thank me for bringing you dinner and some icewater?!, she frowned and shouted at me. Twelve hours isnt enough for you, this way?, she asked, giving me my answer. Twelve hours she left me like this. It seemed like twelve years. I once thought she cared for me, in some small way. But she clearly doesnt. I wouldnt do this to her or anyone for even two hours and she leaves me here for twelve?!!! I muffled some obscenities at her through my gag and kept clawing at the chains holding this thing in my mouth. My jaw was numb and I doubted if I even could talk once this thing came off. Stop it!!, she yelled at me like I was a trained tiger not doing his tricks, Stop it right now or Ill go for another twelve hours!! Calm down, Edward. Breathe. I was panting and gasping at the same time, leaving dignity behind me again. I saw the water bottle and the moisture and wet drops of melted ice all over it as she held it and the brown bag smelled very good and was a nice medium size. I stared at it, and let my breathing calm itself. I felt another tear drain out of my eye and cut a path down my cheek as I stopped making noise. Slowly, I took my hands off the chains on my face and placed them at my sides, loosening my fingers, not making fists anymore. Good boy., she waited, watching me for a while longer before she decided to trust me. Without moving towards me, she put the bag down on the floor with the water bottle and crossed her arms, her raised brow showing that she was still in command here, despite my outburst. Didnt like this, did you, boy?, she looked pleased her punishment made an impact. Without much strength to lie, I shivered and slowly shook my head, praying to God that I could eat and drink soon. Thats why its called a punishment., she instructed. Mmmmmm., I responded, closing my eyes briefly as I smelled the food even stronger in my nostrils. Its hot, I think. Alright, Edward., she fluffed her hair, sighing and walking up to me, standing in front of me, holding a little key in her hand. She moved behind me, placing a kiss on my back between the shoulder blades and I heard a little click and the chain around my face loosened. Her hands held the chains that were being lifted off my face now and my poor jaw almost didnt open to let the ball out at first. My poor little baby., she cooed as she got the ball out of my mouth by squeezing my cheeks together. I breathed out in moans of relief and hurt, gulping the air without any restrictions, falling to the ground on all fours, almost heaving the clean, cool air. My legs shook violently and were cramping again and I fell again, laying on the

cool, hard floor, letting my sore cheek lay against it as I wordlessly suffered at her feet. To my amazement, she didnt scold me or grab me up to my knees. She let me lay there and I wanted to kiss her feet for the pleasure of it. I would have if I had the energy to lift my head. My eyes closed and for a second, sleep was almost more appealing to me than food and water. Poor little thing., she said and I couldnt tell if she was being sarcastic or sympathetic. Roll over, baby, she said, tapping my ass with her hand as I let out a hard breath, pushing a hand to the floor and feeling myself roll onto my back, not even caring about my nudity at this point. She was sitting on the floor, shoes off, next to me, holding the water bottle. Come here. Open, she said without any hint of dominance that time, sliding her hand under my head, lifting it a bit as I opened my mouth a bit, waiting for a trick. Thattta boy., she smiled as she put the bottle to my lips and I felt icy wet heaven pouring in. I let out an orgasm sound as it ran down my throat and I swallowed. I wanted more and I felt hard as a rock now between my legs as she gave more, hearing my cumming moans as she let some run over my lips, then into my mouth as I nearly put my hands on the bottle, then put them back at my sides, wanting to do nothing to fuck this up for myself. I was getting water and Id eat shit if she let me keep having it. Ughhhhh, I closed my eyes, moaning as I drank , finding my vocabulary after a few good deep sips, Uhhhh, thank you! Thank you, Mistress! My words sounded slurred and lazy and my jaw ached as I spoke. Her smile grew at this and she played with her fingernails in the back of my hair, giving a delighted little laugh as I gulped some more. Only you would get an erection because Im giving you water., she smiled, taking the water away and placing it down beside her as I whimpered under my breath, not taking my eyes off it. Im sorry., I panted, Im sorry. No, its alright, Edward., she was very nice today, I like seeing you hard when I reward you. It tells me youre not faking it. Nono., I was kissing her hand as she touched my swollen lips, No I kissed each finger, licking and sucking one into my mouth, thinking of nothing but getting more water and eating. I can be strong inside later. I need food, water, and sleep first. I wonder whats in the bag. It smells good but I cant tell. Stay., she pointed at my nose and took the water bottle with her as she bent over my arisen cock.

Look at that wonderful dick., she grabbed it at the base, around the shaft, Ive missed this talented cock. I breathed a little harder, but didnt care what she wanted to do to me or it, I was laying down and it was fucking paradise, along with the taste of the water still in my tongue and teeth. She poured some water over my penis and I let out a moan as the coolness stung a bit, and then as I peeked down, her mouth opened and my cock disappeared inside it. I was groaning and grunting like a thing, not a person. It didnt matter who she was or what shed done to me today, she was giving me pleasure now and water, the promise of food in the near future. I didnt struggle or really want to. I took the pleasure she was bringing me and I greedily thrashed and enjoyed every second of it, hating myself more every second of it. Dont break, Edward. Something was saying inside me. Youve been through worse than this, stay strong. Remember what Bella taught you. Do what you must to survive, yes, but dont break. Dont let her play you. Shes the one who locked you into that gag for the last twelve hours, dont forget that. Dont fall for her soft voice and wet, hot mouth. Realize shes trying to break you. Wake up. The slurping, wet sounds below just added to my weakness. I could hear my mind talking but my body was very weak at the moment. I tried to hold out but my orgasm was already fast approaching. My eyes kept looking at the bag of food, like a homeless dog. Mistress, I growled, May I please cum? Already?, she asked as she pumped me in her hand and I felt so ashamed. Yes, Im sorry Mistress., I closed my eyes, clenching my already tight jaw. No., she said with a hard tone, Im not done sucking you yet. Hold it back. I whimpered and bit down, trying to hold it off, Sir Kevin flashed to mind again and I felt Victorias mouth around me, tight and wet around my length. The memory of him sucking me helped me to last a little longer. I almost cried out now, as I did then, but Im glad I didnt. Such a good boy., she said a little later, jerking me hard in her hand now, Cum NOW. I groaned and breathed, Thank youthank you Mistress. And I exploded a second later, screaming and howling as I filled her mouth. A few seconds later, she was licking me and sucking me a little more, my moans and sounds making her smile as she rubbed me there, looking down at my face. Ready for dinner? she asked, opening the bag. Tears came to my eyes and I almost asked myself what the fuck? but instead I just asked her, Really? I know, Im too soft on you., she replied, I said no food for two days and here I am, ready to feed you. Thank you Mistress., I said with all the real sincerity in the world.

A few minutes later, I was laying face down on the floor again, my arms laying there around my plastic take out bowl of pasta with cream sauce. It was messy and wet as I sucked it up into my mouth, but hot and delicious as I made pleased, throaty sounds. She was busy slapping both her bare hands down again over my right ass cheek, warming me up for a good spanking. Her slaps were pretty powerful on their own, and it mightve brought a newer sub to tears eventually, but my ass was used to being whipped and spanked. This was a pleasant stroking for me as I ate and every now and then Id make a little sound of surprise when her touch was particularly harder than the others. I was chewing a big mouthful of noodles, closing my eyes as my cock grew under me against the cement floor, the sounds of her palms against my ass prodding me further as I tried to finish my meal before she brought out the whip or cane. Now she was spanking the left side of my ass and I felt sauce on the tip of my nose as I went in for another bite. You are such a little pig., she chuckled behind me, grunting with effort as she kept trying to hurt me, only getting my aroused moans in response of her attentions. I felt much better nowstronger. I dont know what shes got planned for me tomorrow but I feel ready for it. I was focused again, clutching the image of Bella in the grass to my heart, ashamed at how weak I had been earlier. Victoria is good, she knows my weaknesses, she knows how to punish me. She knows how to break me down fast. But there is one thing she does not know. I am going to kill her. My mind has decided it. My body agrees. Once I get what I need, she is going to suffer MY wrath. And she will get no mercy. Only in death will she escape me. It will be slowlike my day with Sir Kevin. Agonizingly, a crawl to her grave. I smile as I lick the bottom of my bowl, getting the last of the sauce with my thick tongue. Right after my spanking, I was allowed to finish my water and then Victoria was kissing me, my mouth and tongue working hers hard, conveying my thanks. Yes, I love you, too., she gently pushed me away, breaking the kiss as my lips closed over her chin, my tongue curling around its edge, my adoring eyes looking up into hers. I have to open up the club., she smiled as I began to kiss the flesh under her chin, taking a soft bite, moaning out under my breath. Stop, Edward., she straightened her happy face and stood up, On all fours, boy. I obeyed her, getting on all fours, staring at the floor below me. You havent slept for awhile., she reminded, Youve earned a rest. I smiled, feeling a wave of delight burning through me. Thank you, Mistress., I breathed.

Into the sleeping cage with you then., she stroked my hair. I crawled forward, toward the corner of the room. The sleeping cage was like something youd see a animal get into if he needed to be transported to another zoo or something. I was able to crawl into it and I could be on all fours inside it. It accepted my whole body inside, I could lay down flat on my back of face inside it, and it had a body pillow on the floor for comfort, if I was permitted it. Its there now and I almost weep at the beauty of the soft white cushion as I touch it with hands and knees, and I wait on all fours, not moving until told to do so. The cage door closes behind my bare feet and I hear the padlock click into place, sealing me inside. Lay down, baby., she says right away and I smile like a child, curling my arms around the body pillow, laying my face into it, my voice purring in sheer joy. Good boy, she smiled back at me as I peeked my eyes open and thanked her with them again, Sleep, angel of mine. Tomorrow is a new day. Thank you, Victoria., I heard my voice say to her, I love you. And Ill love it when youre mine, in this room, soon. I love you, too, chubby., she teased, but I kept smiling, too comfortable to care, Tomorrowworkout time. Yes, Victoria., I cuddled my pillow, feeling my erection beneath me again. Goodnite., she said finally, at the doorway, flicking the lights completely off and I felt another moan of bliss come rising up out of my throat before I could stifle it. Goodnite., I whispered as the door closed from the other side, and the locks all clicked and snapped into their places. And I crashed to sleep. Wonderful, warm, soft, sleepand I was in the park with Bella nowchoosing a daisy from the lush, cool grass that stroked our naked bodies as the sun kissed our flesh from above.

30 BPOV At 10:07pm I reach Moes Pizza. Its not far from school, a few blocks away, a college kid hangout, a little cozy Mom and Pop kind of place with great old fashioned Italian cooking. But Im not here for the food. I push the door open and scan the little place. I see him in the far corner, wearing the kind of clothes a student would. T-shirt, jeans, boots, brown leather jacket. His ice blue eyes light up a bit when he makes eye contact with me and I frown in response, swallowing and going to his table, not sitting yet. I have some things to say, Dr. Collier., I began with an ice voice, First, I am your student. Second, I dont like you showing up at my apartment uninvited. And third, I have a gun in my purse right now thats pointed at your tiny cock. If

you asked me here for anything thats not proper, well, youll get banged, but not the way you pictured it. Am I making myself clear? Wow. I am awesome. I couldve never said that to anyone before. He looked surprised and smiled. Im not here for anything improper, Bella, I assure you., he said, sounding so smooth and arrogant. Can you please sit down now?, he asked, I ordered us plain. Is that a crack about ME?! Thats it. Im shooting the gun now. I dont want pizza!, I growled, What do you want, James? Alright., he took a breath, Im going to go for broke and trust you. Its the only way I can say what I have to say. I want to help you, Bella. With what?, I asked, playing dumb to see what he knewor what he thought he knew. I read some of your reports today., James said cautiously, About Edward. About Fire. I knowVictoria. Even though in your report, you call her Vanessa. I didnt say anything. I couldnt. If he was a friend of hersall that came out of me were hollow breaths of air. I dont know Victoria., I lied, then realized, I dont really know her. I wish I never heard of her. And that Edward hadnt, either. Bella., he leaned in slightly, whispering, Im taking a big chance coming to you like this. Please. I know you dont know me well, but havent I been a good teacher? Ive never done anything strange with you before youve had this subject, have I? That much was true. But I still dont trust him. I cant. Edwards life is on the line. I cant even trust my father who hasnt called me in two days!! I didnt answer but James read my response in my face. I know its a lot to ask, but I wish you would trust me., he said, almost in a whisper, his eyes always watching behind me or out the window as he spoke. Trust has to be earned, James., I said, hoping he saw that I was calling him that, since he didnt want to act like a proper teacher, I didnt have to address him like one. I agree., he said, looking straight into my eyes now, How about if I can check on Edward for you? Would that earn me your trust? What? My mind was all over the place. I didnt trust him. I wanted news and someone to check on Edward. I needed a friend on the inside. I have no idea whats happened to Charlie. But I still dont trust James. Bella, he leaned in more, whispering lower now, Victoriaisshes mysister.

My stomach lurched and I felt all the air suck out of my chest. I didnt know what to say. Sheunderstands that I am not the same as she is., James continued, My whole family understands. They were actually proud of me when I became a teacher. They created a new identity for me. They arent all bad. Theyre glad I wanted something different, nobler than their way of life. They see Victoria as a loose cannon. But a necessary evil. Shes always being watched. Its kind of mydutyto watch her, to be close by and make sure shesokay. Well, good job there, James!, I spat out, Do you have any idea what shes doing?! What shes DONE?! Youve been sleeping on the job, COLLIER! There were times I wanted no part of being her babysitter, Bella., he whispered to me, the music in the air helping to hide his words from others, I just wanted a normal life. I didnt do my job, I know that. I found outthings shed donethings I should have prevented but didnt. Im on the job NOW. I know I have to be. Did you know about her andEdward?, I was afraid to even ask. I did., James looked down at his glass of water in shame, After sheacquired him. Acquired., I huffed, Nice word. Alright, Bella!, he frowned slightly then calmed himself, He was good for her at first. She was happy. She forgot drugs and some of her more illegal activities for awhile. He was unattached. When I saw them together, he wasnt chained up. He was a dancer, free to come or go, thats what I saw. He appeared to be a willing partner. I thought he was a submissive. Wait., I frowned, Edward saw you in my doorway. He didnt recognize you. Ive changed my look since I saw Edward last., James replied, Besides, I mostly saw Edward in dark clubs, while he was performing. He never got a very good look at me before. Victorias very big on keeping everyone as far from that guy as possible. The thing is, I recognized him, that day I came to your place. Or he was sent there by Victoria, to see if I had Edward after the Raven escape. Him coming there the very next morning was no accident. Victoria knows we saved Edward from her. Shit. He is not a willing partner., I also pointed out, defensively, And hes not unattached. He has a family. In Florida, right?, James raised a brow, I know. My heart sank and I became super scared now. How do you know that?, I almost shouted at him, but I kept my voice down. Thats not important, Bella., James face was more serious now, The thing is, Im afraid for Edward now. Something is happening. I cant put my finger on it, but its the way she talks about him thats not right. I cant tell you anything, James., I felt tears brim my eyes as I glanced behind me, out the window.

I know., he sighed, I understand. I talk to Victoria on the phone a lot. She trusts me, at least I think she does. Shes invited me to dinner there in a couple nights. Bellashe asked me to bring you as my date. My eyes went round with terror. WHAT?!, I heard myself almost scream. I didnt even know that shed met you, or knew anything much about you., James said, But if you were a client of hersif youpaidfor Edward, then she had to have met you at some point, gotten information on you. I didnt pay for anything., I seethed, not wanting to share private details of my time with Edward with him. I still dont trust him. I dont care about that, Bella., he sighed again, Im not trying to accuse you of anything. Im just trying to help. What does she want me over to dinner for?, I growled, What are you trying to pull? Nothing!, he frowned back, Im just telling you the truth! Shes trying to get you over there for some reason. If I dont bring you, someone else will! I didnt have to warn you, I couldve just shown up at your place or asked you to stay after class! If I werent a friend, I couldve taken you there by force! You could TRY., I did my best lethal stare back at him, and I cocked the gun in my purse. Edwards empty police gun, left in my possession accidentally after the whole Raven thing. James heard the click and realized I wasnt playing. Bella, you DONT want to shoot me., James almost grinned, The repercussions would be ugly, believe me. Im my fathers favorite son. And my family has guns. Lots and lots of guns. What do you want from me?, I gritted my teeth, Want me to be your date? Dress up nice so I can walk right into Victorias dungeon, too? If she wants me, let her come and get me. But Im not walking in there on my own. Not after all Edwards going through to Are you STUPID?!! Dont say another word to him!! I shut my mouth and was about to stand up, to tell James to go to Hell and take his whore sister with him. But he said, Dont you want to know how Edward is? Maybe get a message to him? Get a message back from him? I know she has him back. I know shes punishing him. She tells me about it. Shes never been this rough with him before. I dont know whats going on but she acts like shes afraid somehow. Like shes afraid shes losing her grip on him. I know it sounds weird, but in her way, she does love him. She wont give him up easily. I cant hear any more of this., I said but then I wanted to know what he knew. What rough punishments she was inflicting upon him. What is she doing to him?, I asked, tears completely filling my eyes now, Is he hurt bad?

James looked at me and something in his face changed. Oh my God., he said quietly, looking very grave suddenly, Youre in love with him. You think Im ashamed to admit that?, I said, letting a tear or two fall, Im not. Yes, I love him. Sorry you didnt get a turn with me, Doctor. Cant I shut up, ever?! Im so fucking dumb!! Bella, I dont care about that, either., he said again, then said, Well, alright, I do care about thatbut, Ill live. Im not ashamed to admit that I like you, Bella. But Im not a nut like my sister. I wouldnt want you in a cage or in chains. And if youre in love with someone else, Im glad for you. I wish you well. But, Bella, if you dont take my help, I dont think itll BE well. You seeshes killed before. Really?, I acted like it was new information to me. James wasnt fooled but he said, Yes, really. In the beginning, she wanted to prove to our father that she was as badass as the boys who work for him. She impressed him alright. They use her place to make people disappear sometimes. Once in awhile, she killsusually its a person whos hurt her. Former lovers, men whove cheatedsubmissives whove bored her. If she suspects Edward doesnt love her anymore He never loved her!, I snarled like a beast, She bought him like a used car and threatened his life! Then she used him like a piece of meat for years and she has the balls to call it love. Its not love at all. Its slavery. Its rape. Torture and murder. So much for not saying anything else. I know, Bella., he said, Believe me, I know. No one whos ever hurt her is still breathing. I missed some chances to save people, Bella, because I didnt want to hear it. I dont want another person dieing on my watch. I cant sleep. I have nightmares all the time. Good., I shot back. What do you want me to do here, Bella?, James asked, leaving it up to me now, Tell me and Ill do it. Give me a test. Ill prove to you Im on your side. Let me go check on him. I know its hurting you, not knowing how he is. I saw you crying today in class. Its none of your business!, I sighed and wondered if I should give him a chance. I had to tell my father about all of this. Maybe I could have Charlie talk to James and see if he agreed to let James in on this. But then theyd all be in the loop and Id still be out. I hated being kept outside this. My father had told me everything was fine. But it wasnt. James said Victoria was going rough on him this week, rougher than ever. Is he lying to me now? Or is he being honest? Had I said something to get Edward hurt? James doesnt know about Charlie watching the club. He cant know. If I tell him that and he tells Victoria, my father and Edward are both dead. No, I cant trust him. I wont. Ill let my father handle this. I trust him, even though hes not doing a damn thing, much less telling me anything.

Edward is strong., I felt another tear fall from my eye, I believe in him. Hell be alright. He left me, he said he couldnt be my boyfriend. He said he belongs to Victoria. He chose her. I was lying to try and protect Edward now after my mouth had run too much. I hope it works. I wish I didnt sound so weak while I said that. He is strong, but hes helpless in the dungeon., James informed, Ive seen her work in there. Even a grown man, a strong man cant defend himself in there. Shes a very knowledgeable dominatrix. She knows how to make men weak. She takes her time, Bella. She doesnt just inflict physical pain. She specializes in mental anguish. I cant trust you., I stood up and flung my purse over my shoulder, turning my back to him to leave, If you truly cared about good, youd have shot the bitch in the head yourself already. Im going to check on him tonight anyway., James said, clutching my heart with his words, Ill call you from a disposable cell phone. Be awake. Im not sure what time Ill be able to call. I half turned my head towards him then forced myself to run out of there, sprinting down the street, clicking my fathers name on my cell phone, wondering if hed really ignore my call again. Then I heard the familiar recording. This is Charlie Swan. You know what to do. DAD!, I screamed into the phone as I quickly walked down the street, I cant BELIEVE you havent called me back! Is this some secret club Im not allowed into or something?!! I want you to call me NOW!! Somethings happened! I need you, DAD! Dont ignore me anymore! Call me NOW!! I pressed the end call button with a very angry thumb and saw my building, but I passed it. I was going towards the train, I was going to go to Fire. Then I stopped before I even got to the stairs going underground. Cant do that. I promised Edward I wouldnt. I could screw everything up if anyone recognized me anywhere near there. I have to go home and wait for James call. My Dads call. At home, I paced my living room floor, thinking things through. Should I have given James a message for Edward? Should I trust him? Should I trust him if he calls me tonight and lets me know how Edward is doing? He could be lying. Victorias brother. He could get close to her and Edward, if she trusts him. Or he could be setting me up to walk right into her trap and tell whats going on, that theres a cop watching her place. Edward would pay for that. No, I cant trust anyone. James said Victoria kills people who she loved, and was hurt by. Edward said she sometimes told him she loved him, on birthdays and Christmases. James said she was being rough with him. I cried again and again, always hitting a brick wall, always afraid to do anything because it might get Edward hurt even more, or killed. Why doesnt Charlie call me? What if hes caught, too? For all I know he could be in the dungeon WITH Edward. And I sit here doing nothing.

I have to call Emmett. Thats not so dangerous, is it? I cant think of anything else to do. Im losing my mind and Im so scared. Im giving Charlie two hours to call me back and then I act on my own.

EPOV Edward session ten., Bellas voice said. I opened my eyes, confused, wondering how she got in here and instantly I felt ashamed, having her see me naked locked in a cage, cuddled up like a happy cat in the mattress. But I wasnt there. I was sitting on the sofa, in the nightshirt Bella gave me, and cozy flannel pajama pants. My bare feet felt so warm on the carpet beneath them. And theres Bella. Dr. Bella. Sitting in her chair, ready to begin, her eyes serious. Her mind, sharp as a razor. Dr. Bella!, I exclaimed, a wave of joy pouring over me at seeing her again, at being with her again. It felt like years since Id been here. I wanted to run up to her, throw my arms around her and cover her shiny lips with my kisses. But Dr. Bella was in now not just my Bella. There would be no playing like that now on her time. Besides, I need the therapy. Hello Edward., she smiled her warm, patient smile at me. I feel so warm and safe now. Hello Dr. Bella., I return my greeting, as usual, unable to hide the dumb smile on my face. How are you doing, Edward?, her expression seemed to look right into my soul as she began. I tried to keep a brave face on and was about to say something like Fine or Not bad but instead, my real feelings came out and leaned forward, my arms huddled around my chest as I let a small sob escape me. Somethings wrong., I heard my deeper, emotional voice say, I used to be able to take so much more. Victoria would have to work on me for days before Id break. In the beginning, she had to kill someone to bring me to my knees. Im so weak, Bella. Its only been a couple days and Im her BITCH already! I told her, more than once, that I love her! I hadnt seen her move but suddenly she was at my side, her arms around me. I clung onto her, letting a relieved breath out as if Id just been thrown a lifesaver. I let my head rest against hers and closed my eyes as she spoke. I was afraid of this., she said, almost to herself, I showed you that it wasnt your fault, what happened to Tanyaand Katie. Before, you could take the punishment because you felt you deserved it and it eased your guilt, every lash, every slap. It almost felt good for you then. Now you dont have that anymore. I stripped you of your armor, in a way.

I want to kill her, Bella., I confessed, feeling tears in my eyes again, wondering if shed be disgusted by me now, I keep dreaming of it. A thousand different dreams of it keep stabbing at my brain. They wont go away. Make them go away. Whatd you think I have, a magic wand or something?, Bella asked in her Bella way and I laughedonly she could make me laugh now. A moment passed and I kissed her hand, getting more power from that as she just let me breathe for a minute or two. I was so strong a couple days ago., I reminisced, I felt like I had the world by the throat. Why do I feel like all of that is gone now? I feel even weaker than before we met. Alright, Edward, listen to me., she said sternly, eyeing me as she replied, We both know youre not going to kill anyone. If you do, youll go to prison. Youll never be free to be with Katie. And worse, youll be in prison mentally. You dont want to go there. Youll never forgive yourself. Youve punished yourself all these years, thinking you were to blame for Tanya and Katie. What will happen to you if youre TRULY responsible for another death? Even hers? You could never look Katie in the eyes again. You dont want that. I could already feel the insanity crawling away from me as she talked. I held her tighter to me, wanting more. I understand., she said, Shes put you through so much. Your mind is not taking the pain and internalizing it on yourself now. You know you dont deserve it now. So your mind is looking at Victoria, blaming her. And it wants revenge. And thats normal. You finally want to strike back, instead of taking it and taking it. Thats a good response. But you cant kill her. Promise me you wont. Bella, I breathed, not knowing if I could promise that. Come on., she gave my body a little nudge. I tried to make myself say the words. But they wouldnt come. Think of it this way., she said, If you do it, you have to be committed. Theyll put you in a hospital, Edward. Theyll decide what you eat, when you sleep, what drugs to try out on you. And itll be up to them if or when you leave. You wont be able to call or see Katie. Or me. No., I groaned, not hiding how disturbing that was for me. Then promise me., she pushed. I promise., I said, meaning it wholeheartedly. I remembered saying those words in the vampire cage, and Victorias words A vampires promise. If you trust that, come on up. I love you., her angel voice came back to me, I am so proud of you. And your strength isnt gone. Its still there. I love you, Bella., I kissed her temple, snuggling my head into hers, Youre the one person who thinks Im strong. No Im not., she said, You know it, too.

Bella, I whispered, loving her and the peace she could always bring me. I was kissing her lips deeply and hungrily, never getting enough of her, ever. Between kisses, I kept saying her name, a magical word that kept healing my soul with every utterance. Bright white light poured into the room suddenly, and Bella disappeared, along with the sofa, the chair, the whole room. Everything was blank, a white page that stung my eyes. And a horrible clanging sound was there instead of Bellas soft rhythmic breathing in my ear. Time to wake up, sleepyhead., a sinister female voice shouted above me and when I opened my eyes, a wooden cane was running back and forth along the cage bars beside my face. Victoria. Fuck. I was naked and in my little cage again, but I didnt feel quite so frail and tiny anymore. That sounded like some dream you were having., her knowing voice didnt sound very happy and I rubbed my eyes, trying to see and adjust to the light, feeling the rough stubble on my face. Oh shit. Dont tell me Im talking in my sleep now. What was the name of your wife, again?, Victoria was walking around next to my cage, The one you let fry in the fire? Do you even remember? I heard myself growl and my fists flew to the bars over my head, my defiant eyes staring Victoria down. She smiled down at me and tilted her head a bit. You think Bella, or any woman, would want you, knowing how well you took care of your first family?, she asked. A violent, broken breath came out of me and my fists shook around the bars now, my eyes on fire as she giggled at me. I better not hear her name again, Edward., Victoria seethed, walking away from me, Unless you want to see me work her over while you lay here and watch. Apologize. After a very hard minute, I heard my voice say, I am sorry. But the feeling in my words told another story. I knew shed heard the anger and resistance in me. I have some guests coming to dinner tomorrow night., Victoria crossed her arms, looking down at me, I would like to trust you to be there, too. Is that going to be a problem? I wondered if this would be a dinner like some weve had before. With me on my knees at her chair side, a metal bar stockade holding my hands up beside each side of my head, also locking around my neck as Id silently wait for a morsel of food now and then from her dish. Shed feed it to me and I would respectfully thank her, only getting up at times when one of her guests would need a new drink. With a bend, my hands could pick up and deliver a glass to someone.

Sometimes, Victorias guests were male doms that had female submissives. I would watch from the floor as they were ordered to crawl under the table and service their masters while they ate. Their tight, bare asses would stare me in the face while they licked and sucked the cocks from inside the opened trousers above them. A couple times, the male doms would get bored and order their girl subs to come pleasure me. Every one would eat and talk while the girls subs had their way with me. Sometimes it was a couple of women on me at once. We were entertainment. That was then. Back when I felt sure Victoria wouldnt let male doms touch me. Now I was so unsure and afraid of what she was up to. Or maybe I was all wrong and this would be a normal dinner, with me dressed and sitting at the table. As a slave?, I asked, taking my hands off the bars, trying to hide my aggression. Yes., she answered, squinting her eyes a little. I took a breath and waited, then asked, IsSir Kevin coming over? My eyes pierced into hers and she knew what I was asking. I wanted to know right now. Would I be raped again? Thats up to you., she said, a wicked tone in her voice, Do I need to call him back over here? No, Mistress., I tried to sound behaved. If you behave, Ill never have another man touch you again., she informed, But if I sense you cant handle girls, if you keep falling in love with your clients, Ill have to make some changes with you. Youd have to service men only. No!, I heard myself yell, and then I quickly brought my voice down, I mean, Im not in love with any clients! I swear! Its only you, Victoria. I love YOU. God, I hate saying that to her. I feel so filthy. I feel like a whore when I betray Bella and say those words to anyone else. She uncrossed her arms and silently went to the door of my cage and unlocked it, raising the door up, giving me an opening. Come out of there., she demanded, moving away from me. I raised up on all fours, feeling well rested as I did so. I backed up, not having the room to turn around and go out head first. Over here., she pointed in front of her and I crawled over, kneeling there. She was touching my hair, without speaking, stroking itshe touched my face and brought my chin up so I was looking at her. I tried to have a pleasant look on my face then, but maybe it wasnt that convincing because she said, Smile. I did, unsure of how sincere it might have appeared to her. But I tried.

She smiled a little back down at me and moved her finger along my bottom lip. You are so beautiful., she said with a little sadness, So beautifulalways. So are you, Victoria., I replied, making my lips kiss her fingers. She was smelling my love for Bella in the air and she wasnt liking it. I had to throw her off the scent. I closed my eyes, trying to forget Victorias face and picture Bellas. Victoria couldnt rule my thoughts and for that I was truly grateful. I dont know what Id do if I ever lost you, she said, allowing me to lay my face on her little stomach. You own me., I said, internally gritting my teeth, You wont lose me. Go work out., she breathed, letting me go, snapping and pointing to something new in the middle of the rooma treadmill and a stairmaster beside it. Which one, Victoria?, I asked. You choose., she said, and I thought she must be sad. She never lets me choose anything. She even picks out my clothes when were entertaining or going out together. Treadmill?, I chose, asking if that was alright. And again, I needed Bella. Fine., she said and I crawled over to it, standing and stepping onto the rubber pad where my feet would be running soon. I waited as she came over and pressed a few buttons while I held the bars at my sides. The pad I was standing on reclined slowly, and in seconds, I was on a very steep incline. Stay., she ordered as I steadied myself, waiting. She walked over to the wall and came back with a couple pairs of handcuffs. She smiled at me and I grinned back, knowing her fondness for these. Youre under arrest., she cheered a little, slapping one cuff over my wrist, the other around the bar beside me. She moved around to my free hand, doing the same there. Whats the charge, officer?, I played along. Being naughty in your dreams., she slapped my ass hard and chuckled as she made her way to the front of the machine, hitting START. The pad under my feet began to move and I held onto the bars, running at a medium pace to keep up with the speed of it. I wondered if I should lie and say I wasnt dreaming of anyone else. But that would piss her off more, me lying to her. And Im not sure what she heard me say. Im sorry, Victoria., I suddenly felt very afraid for Bella, I dont know what I was dreamingI dont even remember it now

Its fine., she watched me run, I dont mind you fucking in your sleep, it wont be long before youre out there again, doing what you do best. Just make sure your dream clients are paying you well. Yes, Victoria., I smirked, feeling the burn start to rise in my lower legs, relieved. It sounded like she just heard me making aroused noises, maybe kissing Bella in my dream, instead of me calling Bellas name and saying that I loved her. Bella is safe. Bella is safe. I hated thinking Bella was out there, exposed, such an easy target. I wished she had listened to me and stayed with Alice or Rosalie. Victoria walked around behind me, hopping her butt up on the leather table Id been on the other night, watching me from behind, probably fixed on my bare ass as I sped up, wishing I could be running away from herforever. Soon. Soon.

BPOV My cell phone rang and I flipped it open right away. I had been staring at the little black phone for the last two hours, unable to do anything else but worry until I heard from both of the men I was waiting on. The name on the screen said Dad on it when I hit the answer button. I tried to keep my voice patient and nice but I didnt do a very good job of it. DAD!, I shouted. Bella, please., he sighed, Why are you leaving me these crazed messages? Maybe because I AM CRAZED, Dad!, I felt myself frowning, Why havent you called me? Why wont you tell me anything? Dont you know how worried I am here?! Bella, I am working., he said, as he always did in the past when Id be having a crisis and Id reach out to him, hearing that phrase instead of what I wanted to hear. Is he alright?, I asked, shivering, Whats happening to him? Bella, I cant tell you that., he sighed again, Just let me handle it, please? Why cant you tell me how he is?!!, I felt angry tears in my eyes, I have a right to know! I dont know!, he growled, scaring the shit out of me, Alright?! That what you wanna hear? We lost the bug somehow. I cant hear him at all. Never heard a thing. Oh my God., I felt the tears fall down my cheeks, What does that mean? Do you think Hes alive, as far as I know., Charlie said, Ive been watching the club like a hawk. No bodies have been taken out. And the chip still says hes inside. This

Victoria woman comes and goes, and that Emmett checked on him once in the middle of the day. But Dad!, I cried, He could be trapped and hurt. Bleeding to death in there! We have to find some way to put a new bug in there. Maybe Emmett could help us. I dont want to risk Edward by involving more people employed by Victoria in this., Charlie said, always the voice of reason, How do we really know we can trust this Emmett? He cares about Edward., I informed, not really wanting to tell my father all about him being my partner in the whole Raven rescue. Hed fry my ass. I know we can trust him, Dad., I said, wishing for once hed just take my word for it. My father wasnt saying anything. Hes on the inside., I pushed harder, He knows Victoria. I need to know whats going on in there. Im not waiting around for him to walk out or be carried out! Hes all alone in there! Bella, dont get emotional, its gonna screw up the whole plan here., Charlie said, his voice still monotone and void of any feeling. You BET Im emotional!, I yelled, Thats the man I love in there! I want him out now! Bella, hes not an imbecile!, Charlie growled, Let him have his few days, like he wanted. Let him get the chance to get what he needs out of there. Once he does, well have Victoria in custody and he can go back to his life and you can go back to yours. What does that mean?, I frowned. It means were still having a talk about all this., Charlie informed, Dont call me and yell at me, Bella. Im trying to help you and your friend. You started all this. Youre the one who bought a hooker!! I gasped, enraged. Im GLAD I bought a hooker!!, I screamed, Maybe I got more love and affection from HIM than I ever did from YOU!! I heard only dead silence on the other end. Right away I regretted saying that. Charlie wasnt a big hugger or kisser, but he was a good father. He was always there for me when my mother wasnt. I remembered what Carlisle and Esme were like to Edward and I felt guilty for bashing my father when I obviously had it so good. I knew I was loved. And now I was hurting him because I was so afraid. Dad, I said, with tears in my voice. Dont call me again., he said, like a machine, Im working to make sure yourfriendis alright. Let me do my job. Ill call you when Im on my way back with him. He hung up and I winced, knowing thats how Charlie reacted when hurt. Im sorry, Dad., I said now, even though he couldnt hear me.

I let my face fall on the pillow under me and heard myself crying as I remembered the wonderful way the bed sunk a bit when Edward joined me here, the smell of him that still lingered in the quilt, the gentle masculine tone of his voice when he asked me, Can I hold you until you fall asleep?, and finally, the miraculous feeling of his hot, muscular arms curling around me, as if afraid to break me by holding too tight. I tried to recreate the sensation of his body spooning behind mine as I laid here now, but the memory wasnt enough. I wanted to FEEL it againfor real. It seemed like a million years since hed laid here with me. I want to see his little ducky lips in the morninghis arms curled up around him, my sweet little Thumper. I dont know how long I laid there crying before my cell rang again. When I went to open it, I noted the time was 3am. The name Dr. Collier on my screen. I answered it and frowned, saying, What? I told you Id call., James said, sounding insulted at my tone. So, talk., I readied myself, How is he? I think hes okay., James said and I hated how vague he sounded. You THINK?, I asked. Well I went there, acting like I was just there to hang out., James said, We hung in her office for awhile and eventually I asked about Edward. She said he was sleeping. I huffed, Sleeping? If Edward was free, and she thought he was asleep, hed have a chance to get that evidence, maybe. Thats what she said., James let out a breath, I couldnt ask too much more or shed get all weird and suspicious. Maybe he passed outor she knocked him out. That seemed more realistic. I couldnt picture her tucking him in for the night, kissing his forehead. And again, I was terribly worried about Edward. James was supposed to try and ease my mind, not that he would even if he told me Edward was fine. Gee, James, thanks for putting yourself on the line and checking on him., I said, my voice thick with sarcasm, I guess now we can be partners. You have my complete trust now. I know, I got nothing tonight., he said, But Ill check again tomorrow afternoon. Whatever., I sighed, feeling a huge pain in my forehead. Sowhat about going with meto Victorias?, James asked, What should I tell her? I mean, I wouldnt really take you in there, but I have to tell her something. Itll buy us a little time if I tell her yes. Part of me thought it wouldnt be a bad plan to go in there with him, acting like I was falling into her trap, and then turning things around on her. If I could trust James, I would do it in a minute. It would be faster than my fathers plan of

waiting and peeking in garbage bags in the back alley of the club. I could wear a bug on me or sneak it in if she took me to Edward. But then I would need Charlie. God, Edward would freak if Victoria and James came dragging me in there. And I would freak if I saw something horrible happening to him on the other side of the coin. Maybe if I bought bullets for Edwards cop gun, that would be more wise than just clicking the trigger. I knew how to shoot, being Charlies daughter, and I knew how to buy bullets. But could I really shoot at a human being? Even her? And what if she got my gun somehow? Edward could get hurt. I could get hurt. Charlie, too. How do cops do this everyday and not go crazy? Every thing I think up is so risky, for all of us. But the only thing worse than any of my plans was no plan at all. I have to do something. I cant sit here anymore and wish upon a star for my happy ending. Our happy ending. I have to get out there and make it happen. I picked up the phone, glad to see Alice was the first name on my phone list, since it was alphabetical. Would she get mad at me for calling at this hour? Probably. But shes Alice, so I know shell forgive me. I know shell want to help us. I know this is a good place to start. So I hit CALL and waited.

31 EPOV I think youve paid for your little lapse of judgement., Victoria said, tying the belt of her white robe, her smile forgiving and sweet on the surface as I stared back at her from the X cross, my ankles and wrists bound to each metal post at the ends, a wide leather strap around my naked waist, holding me securely to it. Tomorrow, you can get the club ready for our little party at about eight-ish., she suggested, Make sure the chefs have all they need, clean everything as meticulously as always and make yourself pretty. Ill let you know around six what you are to wear. Yes, Victoria., I answered, feeling a bit ripe already after a couple of days without a shower, and the perspiration all over me was foul smelling and thick, Thank you. I thanked her because she was letting me off punishment so early and a big part of me was paranoid about that. She never let me off so soon before, and for no good reason. I began to fear about this dinner party she was throwing tomorrow night. I think Im far from through with her punishments. This is just another mind game shes playing. Make me relax and then spring the next thing upon me. I hate feeling this uncertainty all the time. Its like a disease that is killing me slowlyfrom the inside out. I want to talk to Katie. I want to watch Spongebob with her again. I want to smell Bellas hair. I want to sit in the kitchen with Katherine. I want to play piano with Joseph. I want everything I cant have.

My only little spark of hope rose from the ashes in that she was going to let me roam around the club freely all day tomorrow, maybe even tonight. That means I can find that bloody cloth I hid, get my things out of my room and run. Maybe I can even find my blood sample somewhere in Victorias office, if its there. That might be too much to hope for, too convenient. Its probably at her house somewhere, hidden and locked up well. I didnt care. Id have proof of murder against her. And finally, I would be free. She unlocked my cuffs, both wrists and ankles, then the one around my waist and ordered, On all fours and crawl after me, love. I obeyed, and internally growled that shed be taking me out of here now. And here is where the cloth is that I need. I told myself it didnt matter. Tomorrow Id be left here alone to prepare everything, and that included the dungeon. It needed a good cleaning since Id been living here, constantly being punished for the last couple of days. I was sure shed give me the key. Yes, Victoria., I said in a calm voice as I began to crawl slowly after her as she led me out of the dungeon. The only other way back in here would be to anger her in some way and get myself punished again. If plan A failed, that was plan B. I kept my eyes down but I heard her locking the dungeon door, as usual. She was walking up to the club and the music was loud and customers were up there, screaming and cheering. I was stark naked and wanted to hesitate as I crawled up the stairs towards them. I was hideously unkempt, unshaven, and smelly and I felt ill inside at being in front of clients this way, but she had told me to follow her. Dont lose me in the dark., she glanced back at me, If you get lost, youre on your own. So she meant to have me crawling after her, nude, through the club and every woman there. Fuck. Yes, Victoria., I managed to say but could hear myself the empty ring in my voice. My only solace came from the fact that it was dark when we reached the hallways of private rooms. Once in awhile, I would hear a woman or two coming out of a room and cackling loudly at the sight of my naked ass on all fours following my owner. I winced as internally as I could, keeping my eyes on the backs of Victorias bare feet, knowing if I lost them, I was raw meat in a den of hungry lions, once we crossed that red line going into the club. I tried to concentrate on something else as I crossed over the red line into the kaos. Womens voices engulfed me and I just kept my eyes on Victorias feet, a dim bluish light coloring them as I followed, quickly as I could. Oh my God, look at that ass!!, one womans voice said and my eyes squinted, hating the sound of it as a variety of hands began to touch me there. One or two of the hands felt soft and caressing against my right ass cheek. A couple others squeezed and pinched, almost kneaded my flesh as I kept crawling, hoping I wasnt moving too fast or too slowly.

Offending some of these women was an unforgivable rule. Some of these women were angry, man hating, victims of cheating men and would punish any man who seemed to spurn them or their advances. I learned that lesson early on here and I would never forget it. Women arent helpless, frail things. They could be every bit as wicked and strong in their rage as any man. I tried to keep up with Victoria but she was getting a few steps ahead of me. Then I felt someone sitting on my back, riding me like I was a horse. Woooo!!!, a younger womans voice exclaimed as I kept trying to move in silence, Giddyup!! I felt something thin and tight circle around my neck and it was choking me. I heard different voices laughing and I stopped crawling and reached under my throat to loosen the grip of the strap there. Victoria kept walking and I almost couldnt see her anymore. Victoria., I choked but Im sure she couldnt hear me above the music. Oh no you dont!, the girl on my back tightened the strap of her purse around my neck and I opened my mouth, feeling the last little bit of air escape me. Hes trying to get away., she giggled and I put my hands back on the floor, not moving, knowing I was stuck now. Please the clients. That was my number one rule and I always did that. Im sure this is what Victoria wanted all along when she brought me out here. Maybe this is a test, to see how I interacted with the ladies now, after being with Bella. He is cute!, another voice commented as I gritted my teeth and looked at the floor and let them fondle me. They soon got bored with my ass and then my cock was being grabbed and examined. Oh GOD! an older womans voice announced, Youve gotta feel this!! Its fucking GIGANTIC!! The whole room spun over and when I landed on my back, I realized they flipped me over and had me spread eagle below them. I heard a couple of gasps and one of the voices said, Ohhhhh, his face is beautiful! Im not even looking at his face!, another woman replied, laughing heartily as their dark silhouettes danced around me in the blackness. I felt a firm hand around the shaft of my penis and it was being pulled almost violently as a chorus of surprised reactions rose up from the women around me. They laughed and watched as my cock began to harden in the grip of the faceless one who dared to jerk me off. Then I felt other women touching me. One pair of hands were grabbing my ankles and circling her thumbs over my ankle bones as she held them down. My mouth was smothered by a pair of lips from upside down over me that wore heavy lipstick and thrust her tongue into my mouth. Another woman sat on my chest and before I knew it, my hands were above my head, being held by a couple other women. I couldve fought them off but I knew I wasnt allowed to do that. This was part of my job, too, as a dancer here. And Victoria is watching me,

no doubt, watching for any differences in me. I had to show her no differences, even if there were a million of them deep inside me. I moaned as another woman swooped in to kiss my mouth next and I tried to kiss back but I was too distracted by the many mouths licking and sucking on my cock suddenly as the rough hand kept manipulating me without mercy. The strap of someones purse was still around my neck but at least it wasnt tight right now. In fact, my head was resting on the purse below it as I struggled to make my lips open and kiss back with every new pair of lips presented to me. It sounded like all the voices were happy as I submitted to them. I heard myself start groaning and growling as I was being shoved further and further towards my release. The only good thing about reaching it was maybe the girls would let me go once it happened. Come on, give it to us, an older womans voice demanded overhead as different sets of teeth were biting down on my nipples, followed by hungry tongues. When I finally let go and shouted out, it was drowned out by someones tongue reaching down my throat. I exploded, closing my eyes, even though I was blind in the dark, and felt wet mouths lapping me up and devouring me as I finished. A few more sets of lips kissed me but then, with a few comments, all the voices and shadows slowly withdrew and I was alone on the floor. Even the purse was yanked out from under my head as they left me. I almost went to stand up but recalled Victorias orders and returned to my crawling position, making my way quickly up to her office without further incident. I went to open the door but it was locked and I exhaled raggedly, knocking loudly as my knees rested on the steps. After a few moments, the door popped open and I breathed out in relief, crawling into Victorias office, a little more at ease on the soft carpeting as I stopped before her desk on all fours, waiting, my eyes on the white carpet below. The office door locked behind me and I felt her fingernails tickle over my asscheeks and up my spine, playing in my hair as she sat upon the edge of her desk, looking down at me. Have a little extra fun on the way here?, she teased, giggling a little to herself. Yes, Victoria., I answered, just counting the seconds until I was left alone tomorrow. Awww, it wasnt that bad, was it?, she smirked and I made myself smile up at her. No, Victoria., I lied, pretending it had been a nice little release for me. My little tramp., she sighed, adding, Come here. I stood up, knowing what come here means with Victoria. She wanted me and it was time for me to put on a happy face, a hard cock, and perform for her.

EPOV

By the time Victoria let me out of her office, it was after closing time, maybe around 3am when I was dismissed and told to go down and clean things up. The first thing I wanted to clean up was myself and when I went into the dressing rooms, no one was there, thank God. I was naked and spent and didnt really want to see anyone until after a nice hot shower and a shave. I mustve spent about 45 minutes under the hot water, just letting it soak me and soothe my body before I even shampooed and soaped up. I was at the sink, shaving, almost through, when I heard someone out in the dressing area. It was Emmett and Jasper, talking and changing into their street clothes, their pants still on but chests bare. Jasper was taking off his military uniform and Emmett was shedding his tarzan outfit. They were a sight for sore eyes and my voice nearly cracked when I alerted them to my presence. Hey guys., I grinned, using a small towel on my bare shoulder to wipe some shaving cream off the edge of my jaw. Edward!, Emmett looked surprised while Jasper just stared, Youre out! I know., I shared his shock and made a face like his, I guess I was paroled early for good behavior or something. Are you alright?, Jasper looked at me with an intense seriousness that I never saw in his eyes before. He was usually happy-go-lucky all the time. Not right now, though. Im fine., I wiped the rest of my face off, feeling a lot more human now, I mean, Im dead tired, but fine. Im actually going in to clean everything on the floor and then Im going to bed. I feel like I havent slept for a month. Ill help you clean up., Emmett offered and Jasper chimed in, Me, too. Awww, thanks, I accepted. Victoria never had a problem with that. Many times we would dance to our favorite music while we cleaned things up after the night was over. I think thats where we all bonded. I was in my jeans and t-shirt a few minutes later, bare feet, as usual, and we were turning the chairs over and placing them on the tables, removing tablecloths, too. The conversation was light at first. We caught up on what was new in the last couple weeks. Jasper mentioned he had another date with Alice and while I was glad for him I couldnt help feel a twinge of sadness, missing Bella. I wondered what she was doing and how school was going. I knew at the moment she was in bed, asleep, under her favorite quilts and I almost couldnt breathe for wishing I were there with her now. Our two weeks together had gone by so fast. Too fast. They were gone. I clung onto tomorrow and getting that bloody rag. If that went wrong somehow, I was dead. Victorias office lights went dark and her heels were coming down the steps. I tensed as Emmett looked at me and I turned my back to where shed be appearing soon, stripping a new table. Goodnight, eye candy., she stood there, waiting for us to all collectively bid her farewell. I turned and cast my eyes down but Emmett and Jasper didnt. They were allowed to look her in the eye.

Goodnight, Victoria., the three of us said at once, Emmett putting more enthusiasm into his statement than Jasper or I did. In fact, Jasper was frowning a little. I wondered what that was all about. Edward., she called and I looked up a bit. Then she did something miraculous. She tossed me the keys to the club. Her key ring. The keys to the dungeon. I caught them right in the center of my palm as she added, My directions are on my desk for tomorrow. Do a good job. I will, Victoria., I promised with my tone, although my heart was doing back flips that we were a morning away from getting out of her for good. I will be with Bella tomorrow! I wanted to sob out loud from just thinking of it. See you at six., she puckered her lips at the air in my direction and walked out towards the dressing rooms, going out the back exit usually. I shoved the keys into my jeans pocket and returned to turning the chairs over onto the table and a strange silence seemed to rise up now between the three of us. This was weird. Usually, after Victoria left, I could be more myself and talk freely and so did they, knowing our situation. But now, nothing. Maybe I should break the ice. So, what kept you two here so late?, I asked. The dancers were out of here by 2am normally. We had a private thing, Emmett said, A private session with this woman. She liked both of us, so I thought you didnt, I looked at Jasper, do those things, Jazz. Have to now., he shrugged, I have a cash flow problem. Victoria signed me up for extra stuff. Oh., I felt so badly for Jasper and I felt my stomach sink, Sorry, Jazz. What happened? My mother., he shrugged, Health problems. Uh, Edward., Emmett cut in unceremoniously, Want some help tomorrow cleaning and all? I know Vics got some fancy dinner thing happening in the back room tomorrow night. Im gonna be the waiter anyway. Yea, me too., Jasper said, Bartending. Then dancing later. I can join you later in the day if thats alright. Somethings weird here., I smirked and they both froze for a second, You both are volunteering to help me all day, on your free time, with no pay? Am I being punked? We just want to help out., Emmett shrugged, Were your friends, damn, Edward. I know, Im sorry., I smiled, Didnt mean to sound soungrateful. I just meantI can handle it. Im okay.

Emmett and Jasper looked at each other, not saying anything and for a split second I got a shock of fright that they knew about Sir Kevin. There was a definite gaze of pity for me being passed between them in that moment but I busied myself instead of bringing this up now. As far as I was concerned, that storythat DAYwould die with me. I could never tell Bella about it, either. Id die. Shed never look at me the same way again. As it is now, I feared shed never look at me again without that pity in her eyes that I just watched my only two friends share because of me. We know youre okay., Jasper was flipping a chair as he smiled with affection at me, But we have your back, Edward. We dont mind being around to help when you need us. I know they are aware that Im going to be in slave mode tomorrow night, just by this message Jasper was giving me. I felt so embarrassed and ashamed that they were both going to see me this way, out in the open, not behind the dungeon door. Emmett had seen me in some pretty humiliating situations before, but never Jasper. Whatever, maybe tomorrow night would never happen anyway. If I got access to the dungeon and got my cloth out of its hiding place, Id be at Bellas before noon. Id have to call Ben and tell him to get away from his house for a couple days, just until I could be sure that no one would come there looking for any kind of revenge. I had to get into Victorias office, too, tomorrow, and take anything that had my information in it, most of all my daughters address, and Bellas too. I thanked my buds for their loyalties and then the rest of our cleanup time seemed to go by silently. Once in awhile, Id hear Jasper whisper something to Emmett and theyd stop talking when I looked over. Maybe they knew how much I cared for Bella and they felt they couldnt trust me anymore. Maybe they thought I was against them and Victoria now, somehow. I kept thinking of something to say to perish those thoughts, but nothing came to mind. It wasnt like I wanted to lie to them, anyway, denying my love for a normal girl, a normal life. Soon, the club area was pretty clean and Emmett and Jasper were saying their goodbyes to me as I followed them to the back door of the club. UhJasper? I said as we neared the door. Emmett exited already and wasnt looking back to see if Jasper was following. Yea?, he turned to me and smiled, holding the arm of his duffle bag and tossing it over his shoulder. I, I began, almost looking down as usual, but then I raised my eyes up and said it, I am really sorry aboutyouneeding more money for your Mom. Oh., he glanced away for a moment, looking slightly ashamed, Dont worry about it, Edward, its okay. No, I mean, I sighed, I wish I had some money savedto give you. What I wanted to tell you isisnt there another way for you to get the money? Maybe., Jasper had a strange look on his face, What do you mean? I cleared my throat and said, Iwas like you not so long ago. I know what its like when you feel like you have no other choice. And youd do anything to

provide for your family, evenextra things here. But I want to tell you something no one else ever told me. Dont. Jasper frowned and was about to speak again but I cut him off. You start out dancing. Then you do a few little extra things. Soon, you offer to do more. Victoria will offer you insane amounts of money for one nights work. Itll sound so good to you at first. Then, before you know it, you belong to her. Edward Get a loan from the bank or maybe ask other relatives to help out., I suggested, Rob a bank first if you have to. But dont let her suck you in. Youll never get out. I know, Edward., he said, an intent gaze in his eyes as he put a hand on my shoulder, Please dont worry about me, okay? Im not going to get sucked in, I promise. Alright., I decided to end my lecture for now, but I also knew Id be keeping an eye on Jasper to make sure he wouldnt be tempted to even look down this path, let alone walk it. I would hate to stand by and watch someone else become what I am now. That would be the most terrible crime of all, the crime of standing by doing nothing. Be safe, Edward., Jasper said as he left, punching me lightly in the shoulder, See you tomorrow. See ya., I waited for him to leave and then I locked the back door. I nearly ran as I spun around, heading out of the dressing rooms, into the private rooms, then down the stairs to the lower levels of Fire. I got to the dungeon and after a couple of wrong key attempts, I found the correct keys that fit the locks and the door opened. I am inside the dungeonalonefree. It stunk in here, I noticed as I flipped the white light on overhead. Funny how you dont notice the smell while youre trapped inside, only when youve tasted fresh air and return is when you realize what a zoo cage this room is. I am out of here., I growled in triumph as I flipped over the padded leather table and unzipped the underside of it, reaching my hand deep in, feeling for the rough cloth I had pushed in here. Victoria loved this table and told me how it was her first piece of bondage furniture. It had sentimental value and I knew shed never get rid of it. Plus, the cloth was inside the leather, sealed in, safe from heat and dirt. Where the fuck is it? I kept reaching up into the leather, not finding anything but the rubber layer inside. Come on., I breathed, feeling queasy as I reached in further, all of my arm up to my shoulder inside the unzipped leather sleeve. RRRRRRRRRR, I growled, yanking the leather skin off the whole table, not even caring if I ripped it or not.

Nono, I searched and shook the leather, getting nothing. No cloth. Nothing. What?, I shivered as I looked again, feeling inside the leather sack now with both hands, Please After ten minutes of groping the table and turning the leather inside out, I still had nothing. I sank to my knees, gripping my hair tightly with both hands, feeling tears blurring my vision as I tried to think of an explanation, anything... Only Victoria plays in here. Well, Sir Kevin was in here with me all day that first one, but I never saw him do anything to this table. It couldnt have been him. It had to be Victoria. She found it. Shit. I blinked and felt tears skating down my face as I just stared at the open leather sleeve in my lap. If she found it, she knows I put it in there. If she knows I put it in there, she knows Im trying to screw her. Maybe thats why Sir Kevin was set loose on me. But shed been so nice since then, or at least acted that way. What is she playing at? Bella., I breathed, standing up and rushing back out into the hallway, leaving the door ajar and racing up the stairs, two at a time, going to the front door of the club and unlocking it, whipping the door open and standing out in the street with my bare feet. CHARLIE!, I shouted, looking into the night, seeing nothing. But I know hes out there somewhere and can see me, GET IN HERE NOW! I went back in and paced a few times, wiping my eyes with angry hands as I waited for Charlies arrival. The sound of the door opening alerted me and there was Charlie, looking at me questioningly as I stood still, ready to say the horrible words I had to say. Whats up, Edward?, he said in his quiet, low voice. Its gone., I said and my body hurt everywhere. Whats gone?, he stared at me, his voice stronger. My life, my daughter, my Bella, my hopes, my dreams The cloth!, I choked, I just got the chance to go in there alone and its GONE! Shit., Charlie sighed deeply, looking at the floor. A dead silence filled the air. I am deadand I know it. Go protect Bella now., I almost ordered him, Victoria might have someone coming after her . If I know her, and I do, shell be wanting to teach me a big lesson, a lesson I wont forget, like last time. Shes gonna do something horrible to put me back in my place. Last time, it was the boy. This time, it will be her. What about your daughter?, Charlie asked, looking very concerned.

She wont do that yet., I thought aloud, My daughter keeps me close to Victoria, she wont lose that card to play against me. She knows if she hurts my daughter, all bets are off. Ill go after her with all I have, I wont submit to her anymore. Shed only hurt my daughter if I ran away or vanished. She wants to keep me obeying her, wanting to be hers. Just trust me. Go be with Bella. But what then?, he asked me. Take her home to Forks., I could hardly say the words, Shell be safer there and after awhile, Ill convince Victoria that Im not thinking of running away. Keep a close eye on her for awhile, then it should be safe. But what about you?, Charlie squinted, confused. What about me?, I looked at him with a stern eye. How are we getting you out of here now?, Charlie asked. Were not., I looked at the floor, Im staying. But, we have I cant GO!, I closed my eyes, shouting, more angry at myself than at him, If I had some evidence against her, if I had that cloth, Id be free and shed be going to jail. Without anything, theres no way I can leave. Shell get my daughter. Listen, Edward,, Charlie began. Please go, Charlie., I went to the door and opened it for him, staring at the handle of the door, not wanting to see the pity in his eyes now. Protect your daughter., I added, Please. He sighed and began to slowly walk towards the opened doorway. It seemed like forever before he stood there and turned to me one last time. What do I tell Bella?, he asked very quietly, sounding morose. My eyes stung at the mention of her and my insides twisted in agony. No message I could send would ease anything. She would suffer. Her heart would hurt, like mine always would now. I could only offer one message. Tell her Im sorry., I avoided eye contact with Chief Swan, I never meant to hurt her this way. Shell forget me, in time. Take her home to Forks. Get her out of this fucked place. I heard that., Charlie agreed, stepping out now, EdwardI will be back. Im not giving up that easy. Once Bella is safe, Im coming back to get you out of here, too. Okay, Charlie. Take care of her., I smirked, not really believing that completely, but I did know that Charlie was a good man and cop and wanted to help me. But even he, being a cop, knows that sometimes, some people cant be saved. Some people slip through the cracks and dont get a happily ever after. I was now one of those people. Goodnight., he said as he turned and began to walk away as I closed and locked the door.

I had work to do in a few hours. The first day of the end of my life was tomorrow and I at least wanted to get a little rest before having to endure it. I went back to the dungeon to straighten everything up and lock it up again before I went to bed. Now I just had to wait for Victorias lesson, and her reveal that she knew of my little piece of evidence I had hidden in her table. I prayed for Emmett and Jasper, along with Bella and Charlie and Katie that night. Yes, I prayed. I prayed no one else would ever hurt because of me again. Then I thought of Katherine and Joseph. I couldnt stop crying as I laid on my bed in the darkness, seeing so many faces. I will never get close to anyone again. Every time I do, I get them hurt. Its better to just stay alone, like I was before. Bella will be the last person Ill ever love. I could go up to the roof now and let myself fall off. I could go into the dungeon and sharpen Victorias razors and open my veins. Maybe Id lock myself in my cage first, just to send her a message. Yes, Im still your slave. But Im a dead slave. You can have my body but you cant keep me. Youve lost me. You never had me. No. Shell hurt Katie then. Maybe would even kill Katie and her grandparents along with her, just to have one last strike at me, even in my death. She hated to lose games. This was all a big tournament to her. I am so alone. I am so trapped. I honestly thought Id be with Bella tomorrow, free and happy. And I cried again, sobbing like a child as a future with Bella slipped further and further away. Bella and I at the park with Katiegone. Bella and Katie proud of me as I worked an honest living, looking up smiling as I came into the house after a day of workgone. Bella in a white dress, holding rosebuds and walking towards me, tears in her eyesKatie ahead of her, the flower girl, tossing pink pedals onto the white silk on the floor below hergone. The dream of Bella pregnant with my babyand me kissing her huge round stomachgone. The funny image of Charlie in a black tux escorting Bella down the aisle towards me, his face like stone, his eyes filled with murderous rage at me as they approachedmade me laugh through my sobsbut alsogone. I didnt get any sleepor rest. And when I looked at my digital alarm clock, the red numbers said 8:43am. Time to get ready for the day. I had a lot to do. Slaves always do.

BPOV I had spent the night at Alices. After talking to her, she decided to come and get me so I wouldnt be alone. She promised to help me. She said Rosalie would help, too. We would find a way, make a plan. It wasnt impossible.

I must have been really tired because all her assurances sounded so real to me. I believed her, because her tone was so filled with passion and strength, I felt it too. I tried to sleep, but I kept waking up, sweating, calling out for Edward or thinking Alice was him, and holding her or stroking her as I slept. Poor Alice. She was always so nice and understanding. She never once got mad at me. Note to self: Nominate Alice for sainthood after this is all over. It was about 6 in the morning when she gently woke me and said, Your cell phone rang. It was your Dad. She handed the phone to me and I sat up, rubbing my eyes, sighing. I listened to his message that he left me. Bella, where are you?, Charlie asked, Im at your place now, youre not here. Im worried. Call me back as soon as you get this. Thanks. What the hell!!, I yelled as I dialed Charlie, Hes supposed to be watching Edward! Bella!, he answered, sounding relieved. Dad, whats going on?, I asked, the fear in my voice thick, What happened to Edward? Youre supposed to be watching him! Bella, where are you?, Charlie asked, ignoring my questions. At Alices., I snapped back, Tell me! Edward isokay., Charlie sighed, It looks like that evidence he hid is gone now, somehow. He got a chance to get it tonight and it wasnt there. Odds are Victoria found it and destroyed it. Im coming over there. Whats Alices address? Dad, no, go back and protect Edward!, I frowned, Just because theres no evidence doesnt mean hes not still in trouble. If Victoria found that cloth, then Edward could be killed! Dont let that happen! Go back to him! Bella, no., Charlie said a bit more loudly, Edward told me to protect you. He thinks Victoria might come after you to teach him a lesson. I want to get you out of here. Were going home to Forks today. DAD!, I felt tears come to my eyes, No! Im not leaving him! I called you for help, not to escort me back to Forks! This is my home! Edward is my home! If you want to bail out, then bail out. But Im staying here. Im getting Edward out. I heard a sigh and then dead silence. Dad, I said, Theres more I have to tell you. I have a plan. You wont like it, butJames, my psych professor, came to me the other night. He told me hes Victorias brother. And Victoria invited him and Iover to the club for dinnertonight. I told him Id go. What?!!, Charlie growled into the receiver. We are trying to make a plan., I stayed calm, I would like you in on it. But Im a member of the team now, not an outsider.

Youre bait, Bella!, he shouted. If you dont want to be in the plan, Im hanging up and well call you after its over., I warned, Yes or no? He growled again, hating this. Dad, I heard my voice crack, Im in love with him. So in love. I wont be able to rest until hes home with me. I need him, Dad. Please. Help us. I need you, too. Another pause of silence. ThenGive me the address, Bella. Hes in! I knew hed be there for me. He didnt have to like it, but he was always there when I needed him. And God knows I need him now.

32 BPOV James was driving us to dinner and the silence had been deafening. We were almost there when he finally said something to me. You still dont trust me, do you?, he smirked as he glanced at my face, my eyes staring straight ahead through the windshield. I dont trust anyone anymore., I said coldly, not making any effort to look at him. I looked down at my fingers and smiled to myself as Edwards ring beamed up at me. This is the friendship ring I gave him, the one he left behind for me to guard. I hoped, no matter what he heard or saw tonight, hed see this on my finger, and know I am still his friend. I am still the one who loves him. I prayed for him to be brave tonight. I kept picturing his expressions and reactions when he saw me coming into the club with James on my arm. I was also wearing Edwards bear claw necklace, and it went nicely with the dress Alice lent me for tonight. I was just going to come in my jeans and a blouse, but Alice insisted I look the part, so she took over my costuming. She almost made me wear three inch heels but I convinced her I might have to do some running tonight, so she allowed me to wear one inch heels instead. You look very beautiful tonight., James said and instantly my skin began to crawl. I already know James isnt my friend. Anyone willing to bring me into Victorias club, even with the premise that hes going to help me, isnt worried about my safety. Hes taking a chance with my life by bringing me there. Hes risking me getting hurt. So in part, my agreeing to go with him, and him accepting that, was a test from me. And James failed. Edward would never have let me go near Fire after that incident when Victoria threatened me. Even if it was to save his life, he wouldnt use me or risk me at all. I know who my friends are.

Im just playing my part., I looked out the side window of the car, trying to keep strong, thinking of what Id have to do when we got there. What would Edward look like? What would he do? What would he say? I know., James said with a pleasant voice, Im sorry you have to do this. Believe me, once she thinks you dont care about Edward, and he doesnt care about you, shell be alright. Edward will be safe. Youll be safe. Mmmm hmmm., I felt myself getting pissed off. This act of James to help me was fooling no one. And it was insulting to think James found me this stupid and gullible. We pulled up to the club and my stomach sank. Could I really do this? I have to. Here we are., James announced. I have eyes., I opened my door and got out before he could come around and help me out. As James came up to me I said, Its cold tonight. Its not cold. This is May. That was my code to Charlie, telling him I was here and going inside now. I wore a little bug behind the bear claw of Edwards necklace that I was wearing. I looked east and saw the quick flash of headlights, Charlie signaling he heard me and was there. I felt so bad for my father, having to sit out there, waitinglisteningtaping everything the bug would hear tonight. I asked him to promise not to do anything stupid if things went wrong or sounded too dangerous. He didnt. I cant say I was surprised or blame him, but I had to try. I know Charlie would give his life for mine. I just hoped Id never have to see him do it, or even risk it. Cold?, James curled his arm around me, his cotton shirtsleeve on my bare arm, Its like 75 degrees! I hate him touching me. But I let it be for now, letting him think I was going along with his plan until mine began to come together. Great, now Im nauseous. Id love to throw up all over Victoria. I think it would be one of the most significant moments of my life. I took a deep breath as he opened the door for me to enter the club. James knew the club and the employees well and he just breezed past the man at the door, taking me with him as he passed the busy, loud club area and went right, unlocking a door that said Employees Only. We went in, and it was very quiet. A long hallway was before us, with plush red carpeting, white walls. I could hear beautiful opera music as we neared another door at the end of the hall and James knocked on it, winking at me, tightening his arm around me as I winced a little. I wondered who would be answering it. Please not Edward. Please. The door finally opened and I felt a little gush of air escape my lungs as I looked up, readying myself for anything. It was Victoria. Answering her own door? Where are all her slaves? Maybe she knew it was me and just had to be the first one to confront me tonight.

She was dressed in a gorgeous gown, a white and black creation that looked like something youd see Angelina Jolie wearing to the Oscars. Her hair was down but styled very perfectly. She smiled at us like we were her best friends in the world. Funny, considering last time we met, she tried to slash my face. I tried to smile, knowing I was already in danger of being seen for the fraud I was. James!, she put her arms around James and I broke contact with him, not wanting her to touch me more than necessary. Hey woman!, he hugged her back. They certainly didnt look like siblings who didnt agree with each others lifestyles. Then she looked at me and said, Thanks so much for coming! And she embraced me, too. I had to force myself to pat my hands on her back, seeming to return her affection. Come in, come in!, she pulled me in by the hand and I swallowed, adjusting my necklace to make sure it hadnt turned or revealed the bug on it. My eyes were almost afraid to see what was inside but my legs were working, following. James was right beside me and I felt myself looking for Edward as the opera music intensified, a womans voice high and singing gloriously above us. There was a medium sized dining room table there, completely decked out with nice china, candles, flowers. As Victoria led us to our seats, around the other side of the table, I saw him. He wore no shirt but had on a black leather thong. No shoes. His hands were cuffed by leather and chains behind him and he was kneeling on the carpet at the side of the chair at the head of the table, his head down, his face calm and dormanta leather blindfold over his eyes. I let out a little disturbed breath but no one heard it over the music. James stroked my hair in the back, sensing my thoughts as we looked at him. He had still not heard me speak, Im sure he didnt know I was even here. But as Victoria seated us right next to her chair, on her left side, putting me right next to Edward, I feared the secret would be out very soon. James pushed in my chair for me and took his seat next to mine. Victoria was watching me closely as I ignored Edward and took a sip of my water, pretending nothing was there, at least while she was staring at my reaction. We have one other guest coming., Victoria informed, Please make yourself at home and order a drink while were waiting. She walked away and I saw Emmett come in from another doorway to the right. Probably the kitchen area. When he saw me, he looked surprised but held it together better than I was. I smiled slightly at him, feeling myself exhale. It felt good to see a friend here. But I had to act like I didnt know Emmett. I glanced at Edward now, Victoria out of my sight, and saw something. It was very subtle, but I noticed. He inhaled. Then his face, well, his mouth tightened a

little and his brow creased. Was he smelling my shampoo or soap? I was using the strawberry combo again, as usual. He stayed as still as a statue, and I noticed his scars were almost invisible. His hair was perfectly groomed and I ached to touch it. I would only have to lean over a bit to reach him. Hang on, baby. Youre not alone. Im here to take you home. Emmett asked James, What can I get for you, Sir? Good. He was trying not to alert Edward to my presence yet. What would you like, sweetheart?, James took my hand again. I frowned and shook my head at Emmett, not wanting a drink right now. I needed one, but, for some reason I didnt want Edward knowing I was here. I tried to put it off as long as possible. I wasnt sure if he could handle it yet. I wasnt sure if I could handle it yet. Rum and coke., James ordered, And bring my girl a red wine. Yes Sir., he looked up into my eyes and gave me a warm little smile, turning and heading back through the door he came in through. Dinner smells good., James leaned in, almost whispering in my ear, You smell good, too. BELLA. Prick! Edward heard that. I hate you James! I turned and felt tears mist in my eyes as Edwards mouth opened and then his jaw tensed. His brows slanted in anguish and his breathing began to quicken. But he didnt break his position. He remained there, as ordered, and wordlessly wrestled with all the emotions raging in his head at the moment. Edward, I breathed, almost so low that even James didnt hear it. But then Victoria was coming back in, saying, Our last guest has arrived. I couldnt tear my eyes from Edward but made myself do it as James stood up, greeting the newcomer. I stood and turned my head in his direction, and my body froze. Raven, nice to see you again., James kissed her cheek and embraced her, This is my date, Bella Swan. I heard Edward let out another hard breath behind me and I was holding one of my own in as I tried to act like Ive never seen this woman before. Hello., I cracked a smile, Nice to meet you. Raven and Swan., she smiled wickedly at me and Im sure she knew who I was, Two very different birds. One lovely and soft. One dark and lethal. Nice conversation starter. Looks can be very deceiving., I replied, Ill bet on a protective swan over a little crow any day. I heard Edward give a little groan behind me, clearly not enjoying our conversation at all.

Excuse me., she smiled and moved around us to approach Edward. I half spun, watching her like a hawk, another fierce bird. Edward!, she took his face into her hands, tilting it up towards hers, You look so beautiful! His lips tried to smile and she added, You may speak. Thank you, Raven., he said and I thought my heart would break at the sound of it. I felt like I hadnt heard his voice for two thousand years. Victoria watched them, smiling like Raven was playing with her dog, as if to say, isnt that cute? She is obsessed with my pet., Victoria shared with James. Come., Raven tapped the side of Edwards cheek and he winced slightly, opening his lips and kissing her mouth as she leaned down, giving it to him. I couldnt look away, even though I wanted to. Id never seen him performing his slave duties to these bitches, Id only imagined it. I cant imagine how hard it must be for him normally, let alone now. I didnt feel much jealousy or anger towards Edward. This was his way of life for so long, its how he survivedand helped Katie survive. I only felt a deeper sadness for him as I watched the kiss intensify and deepen. Mmmm, Raven placed three more small kisses on his shiny lips and stroked his hair with both hands, I love those lips. She brought his face to her chest and was really stroking his scalp through his hair as she looked at Victoria and said, almost irately, When are you going to let me have this pup? Ive waited forever! Victoria laughed and shook her head, I told you, when Im bored of him, hes yours. Its not my fault he never gets boring. And he keeps getting cuter and sexier, too., Raven took another look down at the blindfolded face. Then she grabbed the back of his hair and her other hand pinched at his right nipple, hard. Edward moaned out, cringing a bit, making a beautiful submissive expression, his head pulled back by the hair. SSSSS, he hissed as Raven toyed with him. I could see he was trying to hold it together and pretend I wasnt here, watching this. It might have been easier for him with the blindfold on. Good boyso good, Raven twisted his nipple as Edward stayed in position, enduring it quietly. Come on, sit down and have a drink., Victoria rolled her eyes at Raven, taking her own seat at the head of the table. Emmett was coming back into the room with our drinks and placed them down. Raven tried to sit in my chair next to Edward but I darted in front of my seat, blocking her. This is MY place., I stated firmly, my eyes not afraid to glare into hers.

Raven smirked at me and took a step or two back, moving to Victorias right side, sitting down and ordering a hard drink from Emmett. James and I sat down, and again, James pushed my chair in for me. Come here, boy., Victoria patted her leg and Edward stiffly moved to her side, very close to her. Lets take this off., she unbuckled the blindfold at the back of his head, Those eyes are too gorgeous to keep hidden for long. Thats the truth., Raven watched admiringly as the blindfold laid on the table and Edwards eyes blinked open a couple times. Raven gave a light gasp, enjoying the view, Magical, she whispered. I forced myself to look away, anywhere else. I was afraid to see how he would look at me. He had told me to stay away from here, to be safe. No female subs?, James smiled, Doesnt anyone ever bring me a snack anymore? Victoria laughed, Shut up, James, you have a gorgeous woman of your own now. I looked at her and at Edward. His eyes were cast down at the floor, but the pain there was obvious. Thats the truth., James repeated Ravens statement from earlier, putting his arm around me again, his nose touching my hair as I smiled weakly. Under the table, I wiggled the middle finger wearing Edwards friendship ring at his downcast eyes. It wasnt easy to do with Victoria sitting there, but I did it. And I think Edward saw it. His eyes rose up a bit, finding mine as I glanced at him, winking for a quarter of a split second. So how long have you two been dating now?, Victoria asked, sounding happy for us. I let James answer that. He was already jumping in anyway. Weve been dating on an off for about a year now., James said, Weve had to be careful because shes still a student and Im a teacher. But, were really together now. Your pet, there, Edwin, really helped Bella see some important things. Edward., I corrected, hating James and his yukky story about us. Whatever., James grinned, She told me that their sex was great, but there was no real emotion involved. It was all so mechanical. It made her realize how much better it is to make love instead of just fucking in different sleazy little scenarios. As soon as he left, she came to me and weve been together ever since. You cocksucker. I only pray Edwards not believing a fucking word of that. Poor Charliehe can hear all this too. Hes gonna kill me.

Lo Mein., I said clearly and Edwards eyes nearly sparkled as he eyed me carefully, not being caught by anyone. What?, James squinted, smiling. I thought I smelled Lo Mein., I grinned at Edward, In the kitchen. There you go, sweet heart. Dont you believe anything except I love you. I moved my fingers over my necklace and Edward noticed that, too. Smart Edward. He understood. He smiled at me. No, I dont think so., Victoria pondered, totally out of the loop on our secret word. Emmett was bringing Ravens drink to her now and he asked Victoria if she cared for anything. She ordered a vodka on the rocks. The conversation stalled for a minute or two but then Victoria sighed and glanced at Edward. Come here, baby., she beckoned to Edward and he moved on his knees towards her. I saw Ravens eyes staring at his perfect ass as he was turned to his side now. She gently moved his head to her lap and turned his face towards me, laying his cheek on her dress as she played with his hair, casually, as if she hardly was paying him any attention. He looked at me and his eyes shined a little as Victoria was talking idly with Raven. A hundred things were being said to me from those eyes. Why are you here? Im sorry. Im afraid for you. Get out of here, Bella. Dont see me this way. I hate what I am. Save yourself, Bella. Im so ashamed. I might have been showing too much emotion as I looked back into his eyes, but I couldnt look upon him with cold, uncaring eyes anymore. My eyes kept saying I love you over and over again. They said hang on. Be strong. We will survive this. We will be free. We will be together. His eyes closed and his body shivered a little and I looked up at Victoria, wondering if shed feel itit would give him away. What do you think, Bella?, Victoria asked me, and Raven was looking at me too. What?, I asked, feeling like a kid in class who wasnt paying attention to the teacher as he spoke.

Do you prefer dominatingor are you a sub?, Victoria asked, adding, And James, you shut up, I want her to answer. I almost wanted to say, Neither. Im normal. But I knew that wouldnt be taken lightly by this crowd. Edward opened his eyes and they widened a little at me. I knew I had to lie. I was weighing my options both ways and I realized I was taking too long when they both laughed at me. See, this is a play party., Victoria spoke to me like I was a toddler, After dinner, we will begin to play. We were just curious what you are. Itll help the games. Edward was panting harder now and I felt Victoria stroking her fingernails along the back of his neck as if he were a silly puppy she were soothing, hardly giving him a thought. This is a play party. James you fuck. I almost said I liked to dominate but Id die before I put myself in the same category with these sick bitches. So I dared it. Im a sub., I said squarely right back at them, unafraid. NO!, Edward lunged at me a bit but Victoria smiled, ready for that, and yanked him back to her lap. Anything you are, Edward, I am too. If I have to choose a team, I choose Team Edward. Shhh, boy., she said to him but kept smirking at me, playfully covering Edwards mouth, inserting a finger into his mouth as his eyes closed, pained. Yea, the best sex I ever had was when Edward tied me to a stool in my apartment and spanked me., I felt so brave suddenly, mentally apologizing to my Dad as I said the words. Id be in a convent full of nuns if I ever made it out of here alive. Ughhh, Edward was muffled by two of Victorias fingers now in his mouth but I stayed strong. Show no weakness. Show them what it looks like when someone stands up to them. Lets see how dominant they are now. James gave me a strange look, as if I were doing something wrong. I just smiled at him, crossing my arms as Emmett placed Victorias vodka glass down before her. Thank you Emmett., she smiled up at him and he returned the smile. She took the glass in her hand as Emmett began to walk away, glancing back at her. Come here, baby, drink., Victoria jerked Edwards face up and poured the drink into his mouth. Emmett spun around, his mouth falling open as Edward swallowed the bitter drink. I felt scared, seeing Emmetts reaction to this. What was in that drink?

Edward coughed a little, taken by surprise by the drink suddenly, and again, he was looking at me, fear painted in his eyes. Good, I can tie you back to back with Edward, here and we can have a little contest to see which holds out longer., Victoria giggled, delighted with her idea. Emmett blinked in disbelief and rushed back into the kitchen. I like it., Raven grinned, I volunteer to handle Bella. Bring it on., I put on my tough game face, smirking. A ragged breath came out of Edward, I knew this was putting him through Hell and I hated it, but we would have to go through Hell to get out of here. I was willing to do that for himand us. Emmett soon brought out the food for all of us and I found myself just picking at it, keeping my mind on all the details of our plan. Victoria hardly ate, either, but she did enjoy feeding bites of her food to Edward, who knelt at her side obediently, looking at me every so often, his eyes lost and frightened with intense sorrow. James ate like there was no tomorrow and Raven ate some of her food, not all of it. Victoria fed Edward a piece of steak and the steak sauce was on her fingers. Without a word, she held her fingers to his mouth and he looked at me in shame, licking off and sucking each fingertip, tears almost filling his eyes as he stared at me, closing his eyes as he reached the third finger, unable to face me anymore during this task. Ravens eyes were always on Edward and I noticed that. She envied Victoria. She wanted Edward and she looked heartbroken every time the two interacted. Maybe I could use that. Turn Raven and Victoria on one another. Psychology could come in very useful here, I thought, surprised and amazed by that fact. I joined in the conversation and said, So, Raven, Edward tells me you are one wicked dominatrixmaybe even more intense than Victoria. Victorias smile stalled as she regarded me but I smiled more, looking at Ravens pleased face. Edward couldnt help it, his eyes darted up to me and rounded in shock at me. Is that so?, Victoria looked at Edward and picked up her steak knife, slightly placing the sharp tip to Edwards ass cheek, getting a gasp from him. No, Mistress., he breathed, Youonly you. I held my breath, glancing Ravens way now. Good, Edward. Hang in there. Of course he says that when theres a knife in his ass., Raven took a sip of her drink, But Edward talks to clients about me, even when Im not aroundor you, Vicky. Dont be so sure, Raven., Victoria sneered, He does anything I say. If I ordered him to go fuck my brother right now, hed do it.

Edward groaned, closing his eyes as James scoffed, Leave me out of this. I dont want Edwin fucking me, thanks, though. His name is Edward, Jamie!, I scowled at James. Whatever. I say we settle this tonight, once and for all., Raven suggested, frowning, Whoever gets the safe word out of him, wins him. No. No. No. This is taking a wrong turn. Fix it, Bella! I dont have to fight for something thats already mine., Victoria frowned defensively, End of discussion. Edward is mine. Hes going to remain mine. And if you keep pissing me off, when its time, Ill give him to Sir Kevin instead as a birthday gift. Wrong bitch. Edward is mine. God, am I no better than them? I felt so guilty for that thought, but it just slipped into mind. Maybe deep down were all doms and subs. Youre just afraid that youll lose., Raven challenged, When Edwards with me, he says he loves me, he adores me. Hes PAID to!, Victoria stood up, grabbing Edwards hair tight as he winced, Hes very fucking good at it! Even this dumb little bitch believes hes in love with her! She jerked her head at me now and Edward opened his eyes, struggling a little in his cuffs as James chuckled. Victoria, Edward began to struggle a bit more, his wrists tightly pinned behind him. He began to rise off his knees but she shoved him to the floor, onto his ass. Emmett!!, Victoria screamed and I froze, looking at Ravens face as Emmett entered from the kitchen. Yes, Victoria?, he asked respectfully. Raven, Victoria frowned, removing her belt and looping it around Edwards neck securely, holding him close to her leg, Are these the two who rescued Edward from your place that night? She looked at me and then again at Emmett, confirming it. Yes., she crossed her arms. Dead shit, Emmett., Victoria sneered as two large men came up behind him, a towel tightly capturing his face as they shoved him to the wall, handcuffing his hands behind him. Take him outside, in back. Beat him unrecognizable for starters.., Victoria ordered as Edward struggled harder, choking from the tight grip the belt had around his own neck the more he fought. It was my idea!, I jumped up, tears in my eyes, Dont hurt him! Emmett!, Edward said in a strangled cry, growling as they took Emmett away.

It was her fault!, Edward groaned loudly, She intended to keep me again! She had no plans on letting me go! It was past the time I was supposed to leave! Dont care., Victoria sneered at him, He broke the rules. You broke the rules. I told you, youre not allowed friends. You can kiss Emmett goodbye. No, please dont, Victoria!, Edward pleaded, Im sorry, so sorry! Please! James, do something., I said to him, knowing he was a traitor and a liar, but this would be my proof of it. I will., he said, and the next thing I knew, I was being thrown into the table. Bella Swan, James was handcuffing me and I heard Edward yelling at the top of his lungs. No!!!, I could hear Edwards guttural screams while James grabbed me up by my hair. You belong to me now., James seethed in my ear as I focused and saw Edward, being overtaken by those men that had taken Emmett a minute ago. All of them, downstairs., Victoria grumbled, displeased as she followed the men who were shoving Edward around. James had me by the hair, shoving me after them. We went through another door that lead downstairs without having to go through the club, no one would see us. Raven was walking along with the group, not saying a word but the noise was obviously all coming from Edward. Not yet Charlie., I said in a low voice into my necklace, drowned out by Edwards screaming voice. It was dark going down this hallway. I couldnt see him, but I could hear him. You WILL NOT hurt Emmett OR BELLA!!, he was roaring, I wont let you, you murdering BITCH!! TAKE YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF ME, YOU GOD DAMNED CHILD MOLESTERS!! The traffic stopped then in the narrow hallway and I screamed as I heard a scuffle and fists punching flesh. Edwards shouts quieted and then I heard him coughing wetly in the dark. Got anything else to say?, a mans voice asked. Edward!, I shivered. Dont hit his face., I heard Raven say in Edwards defense. If you hurt them, Victoria, Edwards voice sounded evil and almost psychotic now, Ill kill you with my own hands. I heard Edward shout out again, as if the wind had been knocked out of him, as if he were being punched in the stomach hard. STOP IT!, I tried to move towards them but James arm curled around my neck, holding me to him, LEAVE HIM ALONE!!

Move this into the dungeon., Victoria said, Every few years this pup needs a little reminder. NO!!, Edward roared as we began moving again, BELLA!! RUN!! It will be okay., I said quietly into my necklace, giving Charlie a message, Its okay. James thought I was assuring myself of this and he chuckled behind me. Youll be okay, Bella., he whispered to me, A little punishment for you and then were outta here. We can begin your training first thing in the morning. Youll like it at my place. My dungeon is much nicer than Victorias. I knew it., I gritted, Having just one sick fuck in the family was too good to be true. I could hear Edward ahead of me, resisting very hard, it sounded like as they were taking him into the dungeon again. Chain him there. Hoist him up., I heard Victoria demanding as James and I walked through the darker end of the hall. Its alright, sweetie., I heard Raven saying to Edward in the background, Just relax. BELLA!!, he shouted, panting, growling in protest as I began to see a red light and a doorway. Wheres BELLA?!!, he screamed as I heard a chain clanging. Dont worry, shes coming., Victoria cooed, This punishment wouldnt be half as effective without HER. No, Victoria!, he was struggling fiercely when I was brought in. I could see him now, hanging by his wrists, on tiptoes, wildly thrashing around in vein as the two men left the room, not needed anymore. Guard this room., Victoria told them, Kill anyone who tries to come in this hallway. Good, Charlie heard that. I didnt want them trying to come in until we found something or got Victoria to confess to something that would stick. I pictured Alice and Rosalie, wearing their disguises, sneaking into Victorias office to hack into her computer and find any type of incriminating evidence against her. They wore wigs and pretended to be women in the club, customers. Calm down, angel., Raven was trying to relax Edward but he kept roaring out, enraged. Hes never like this with me., Raven commented, shaking her head at Victoria, watching as James brought me closer to where Edward was hanging. Hang her right next to him., Victoria said to James as Edward kept struggling. NO!!, Edward yelled, Dont touch her!! I swear to GOD, VICTORIA!! LET HER GO!!, Edward screamed out louder. Edwardits okay., I tried to sound tough, although inside I was freaking out.

I never saw Edward this way, so out of control. He could barely form real words as James uncuffed my wrists from behind me, then Victoria was cuffing my wrists with leather restraints in front, clipping them into a hook. Edward was growling and struggling like a tiger, screaming out and almost whimpering as he looked at me and Victoria moved back to a lever, turning it, making my cuffs raise up on the hook, slowly brining me to my tiptoes right across from Edward. No, please, Victoria!!! Ill do whatever you say!!, Edward panted, tears in his eyes, his teeth gritted in frustration as he bared his teeth and lunged again, uselessly caught in his own cuffs. Ow., I winced, already finding it hard to keep up on my toes, pulled so high up this way. Raven was behind Edward, rubbing his back affectionately as James began unbuttoning his own shirt, slipping it off and tossing it aside. Victoria just turned and went to another corner of the room Edwards breathing was deep and fast, his fists jerked in his cuffs. He sounded in pain. Victoria, Im begging you!!, Edward was looking at her, his eyes wild, Please!! Ive given you everything I am! Ive never asked for ANYTHING !! Pleasejust give me this one thing. Please let her go!! PLEASE!! I took this small little opportunity to help him. I knew they were watching me but I didnt care. Victoria wouldnt listen to him, as heartbreaking as his plea was, I knew it would do me no good. But I loved him with all my heart for saying the words. How adorable., Victoria smiled, Trying to protect your girl. I put my forehead to his and closed my eyes, my nose nuzzling against his. Shhhhh., I whispered and right away he began to quiet a little, Its alright. Shhhhwere together again. Nothing can hurt us now. Breathe Edward whimpered, trying to relaxbut Im sure he knew better than I did what these people could do. And that there was plenty that could hurt us now. But I also knew we werent alone here. I wish I couldve told him that. I was certain my father could now help Emmett and I prayed those men didnt hurt Charlie instead. It was two against one. But Ill also bet Emmett is pretty dangerous, even handcuffed. He once beat two men that were hurting Edward in that same back alleyway. Sweet, arent they?, James commented behind me. RRRRRRRRRR!!!!, Edward frowned again, lunging at James, but his chains jerked him back again, and he cried out in a bit of pain. See, I dont blame you, Edward., Victoria was coming back over to us as I felt James behind me, lifting my right leg and taking my shoe off. Youre a man., Victoria continued, You are always so proper and obedient. Once in awhile, the testosterone must rise and then you burst out, like you are now, a writhing beast that wants to challenge me. Its natural. I dont mind going through this with you every so often. But I have to correct your mistake. And enforce my rules.

James had my other shoe off now and Edward was growling again, low in his chest as he watched James. Bella, Edward cried softly, shaking. Then James stood and I felt the zipper of my dress in back pulling down my spine, the little sound almost echoed in the air. Again, Edward screamed out and tried to thrash at James, but he only hurt himself again. I braced myself, feeling my insides turn to jelly. Being naked in front of strangers was something Edward had to live with but Im also sure he clearly remembers the first time in Victorias office when he had to strip and let her look him over while the loan sharks were waiting downstairs to kill him. Be brave, I told myself, using my mind to fight them. Keep in control. Dont let this break you. Thats what they want. Pretend you still have clothes on. They cant hurt me. They cant hurt me. I felt a scissor snip at the shoulders of my dress while Edwards pained breathing kept getting more and more hollow and anguished. This was the most cruel punishment of all for him. Not being hurt himself, having to watch someone he cared for being hurt right in front of him, and him helpless to do anything about it but watch. Shhhhh., Raven was trying to ease Edward now, hugging him from behind and moving her hands over his perfect chest softly, she laid her head on his back but he still didnt calm down at all. I could use Raven here. When the time is right, I can use her to my advantage. She cares for Edward. Shes a sick bitch, but she cares. I can use that. A hard tug on the fabric and my breasts were exposed now, my black bra staring Edward in the face as he bellowed obscenities at James. The bottom half of my dress fell to the floor in a puddle and I was in my bra and panties now. I went to the one place I could be brave. I leaned my head back to Edwards and closed my eyes, hearing him crying and feeling his tears on my own face as I felt the scissors cutting at my underwear, being roughly yanked from me. I shivered but I didnt cry. I didnt scream. I was with Edward. I am okay. I am fine. I kept willing my brain to accept these messages as truth. Im sorry, Bella., he sobbed, I am so fucking sorry. Im not., I said and his eyes opened to stare into mine, in awe at what Id just said. Id rather be here with you nowthan anywhere else in the world., I whispered to him. James was talking to Victoria and Raven a couple feet away now, no doubt preparing their little game. Ive missed you, Edward., I whispered, letting my body touch his, hearing his breathing calm a bit, Be strong. We will get out of this. I love you. I love you more than anything, Edward Cullen. He let out another tortured sob and whispered, I love you, Bella Swan.

I kissed his salty lips with all the passion I had in me and he returned it ten fold. For a moment, I forgot the situation we were in, where we were. A hard lash whipped out and Edwards back arched a bit, his growl loud and labored. Break over., Victoria announced, holding a chain whip in her hand. My necklace was still on and I was glad. Even if they took it off me and tossed it to the ground, the bug would still work, so it didnt really matter. But I liked it that Edward could see it. Maybe it would bring him strengthit would bring US strength. We would need it now. I was terrified of the pain they would inflict upon us. I was afraid of dieing here. But, looking into Edwards eyesI felt braver. For him, for the love hes given me, I would gladly endure anything they could dish out. His touch is worth a hundred thousand deaths. But Edward defied her and gave me another soft kiss. James was stroking my hair and moving his fingers down my bare back as I clenched my eyes shut. I knew you had a tight little body under those sweaters., James reached around and cupped my right breast in his hand. I tensed and let a little scream escape me and Edward shouted again, a shout of anger and pain. Lets get started, shall we?, Victoria asked, Lets start with our new toy. Shes NOT a TOY!!, Edward roared. She is now., Victoria said, playing with Edwards hair, She is James new toy. So dont be afraid. I wont kill her. But she deserves a little punishment for leading you astray. Then James will take her home. Maybe, if you behave, and after Bella learns her place, we can all play together sometimes, like we are now. This way, I know youll behaveand so will she. If either of you steps out of line, all we have to do is call each other and set up a play date. RRRRR!!!!, Edward raged, jerking away from her hand in his hair, struggling and yanking on his arms again, in vein. Jamesbegin discipline on your bitch., Victoria took a step or two back, unsnapping the leather thong from the front of Edwards crotch, making him as naked as I was. So difficult to decide what to do first., he was touching me again, palming my ass as I closed my eyes and tensed, trying to block it out of my mind, using Edwards face near mine for courage. Shes so new to all this., James pondered out loud. I opened my eyes and found Victoria and made my voice loud. At least you wont be chopping off my fingers and eating them., I sneered at her and Edwards eyes snapped open, looking at me with terror. Victoria just stared.

I know youve killed people in here before., I stated, I know about Jason White. Im sure hes just one of the many people youve murdered! Bella, dont., Edward breathed. I dont know what youre talking about., Victoria gave me a lethal glare, Shut her up, James. Then I felt a thin, hard instrument crack down hard across both my asscheeks. The force of it and the bite was super intense. I couldnt help it, I screamed out like a savage, tears welling up instantly in my eyes. You FUCKING BASTARD!, Edward raged, That cane is not for beginners, you FAGGOT!! I dont think theyre considering the etiquette associated with responsible masters and safe, sane, consensual players. The tears spilled from my eyes and ran down my cheeks as I shivered violently and breathed heavytrying to wait the pain out, hoping it would fade. James laughed and so did Victoria. I didnt hear anything from Raven. Edward was kissing my forehead, then my cheek, trying to calm me, his own body trembled as his eyes closed, another tear or two trickling out of the corners. He just kept whispering over and over again, Im sorry, Im sorryIm sorry I kept thinking of what Edward told me about pain and pleasureI wish I could learn to be tougher. I needed it right now. My body wasnt hardened or ready for this. Edward would see me hurt greatly and I wouldnt be able to hold it in or pretend. Maybe hes right., James chuckled, handing it to Victoria, Edward is no beginner, is he, Vic? Absolutely not., she smirked, taking it, Although the way hes acting tonight, who could tell? No., I whimpered, knowing theyd hurt Edward now. Its okay., he whispered to me, almost inaudibly. Now, Edward, every time you scream, Bella will pay for it., Victoria informed. His lips pursed together and his jaw tightened as I felt James fingers caressing the line hed made across my butt. I wanted to get sick all over him, right now. Five lashes to start off., Victoria said behind Edward, Count off, boy. I heard the cane slice through the air, a horrible WHOOSH sound and then a very loud crack snapped in my ears. Shivering again, tighter than before, Edward bit down harder, his face trembling and his eyes closed as he silently endured the first lash. One. He gritted through his teeth. CRACK!!.

Edwards back arched and his forehead left mine as he looked straight up at the ceiling, breathing deeper and giving a small growl. Two. Tears fell from my eyes again as I blinked, hating this. I know how it hurts and he is just taking it, without even the luxury of getting to scream or howl out to release a little bit of that torment. I began to cry, softly, unable to hold it in anymore as the third blow was struck. With a sudden jerk of the head, his face was back near mine again and his whole body quivered in pain. Three., he breathed hotly across my face. Edward, scream if you have to, please., I pleaded tearfully, kissing his chin, the closest part of him near my lips. For what?, he tried to smile at me, This doesnt hurt. SLASH!! That last comment by him made Victoria angry and I could tell this particular blow was very hard. Edward shook harder, against my body and squeezed his eyes tight, panting for air. Four. One more., Victoria bit on her bottom lip and really swung it this time. Edward nearly did scream out that time. But he held it in, his head bending down tight and his fists struggling above him, clanging the chains. His breaths came in fast, hard gustsand when he looked up at me, and opened his eyes, tears trailed down on both sides of his face. Five., he choked. I saw Raven behind Edward, now taking a moment to ease his pain. Victoria stepped away while Raven planted soft kisses over the welts the cane left behind. She began licking the harsh lines as Edward nuzzled his face into my neck. No screaming., Victoria said, slapping Edwards ass hard, That means you get another turn and Bella gets a pass this round. Edward let out a sigh of relief and I swear I think I saw him smile. He had spared me some pain, for now, and he looked so proud of himself for finding a way to protect me. I hadnt heard anything from James that whole time. I wondered why. Whats your problem?, Victoria said to James behind me. I dont know., James sat on a table a couple feet away, I feel soout of it. Tired. James told me all about Jason White., I inserted now, watching Victorias face, He told my father everything, too. NYPD knows, too. Hes telling everyone everything about you. Hes sick of playing teacher. Hes tired of babysitting you. He wants whats yours. He wants this place. He wants to be free of youfor good.

Bullshit!, James sneered as Victoria looked at him, a look of distrust now there. A chain looped around my neck then and it tightened, James closing it behind my neck as Edward screamed. You better start telling the truth if you want air, you little bitch!, James sneered as I felt the chain dig in a bit, making it very difficult to breathe. NO!!, Edward screamed, pleading, Victoria, STOP HIM!! Tell her the TRUTH, BELLA!, James tightened it, NOW!! Gasping, I kept to my story. She would never believe I was lying to them while being choked. Jasper is in on it with James., I choked, Jasper wanted to work the bar so he could spike your drinks tonight. He spiked yours, to put you to sleep so he could kill you easier. But you made Edward drink it. Just watch, Edward will start to get sleepy any minute. Hell fall asleep. Let her go., Victoria demanded to James, Shes telling the truth, isnt she? Oh, come on!, James argued, letting go of the chain around my throat, Youre gonna believe her lies after all weve been through together?! I gulped up the air and stared into Edwards relieved face, feeling his cheek stroking itself up and down mine to give me whatever comfort he could. His lips reached down to the marks in my neck, kissing them away. Sleep., I whispered to him, placing my lips so delicately upon his. I saw Edwards crooked grin then and felt as if we were already free. A second or two later, his eyes fluttered and he let out a hard breath, whispering, Victoria And then he let his head drop weakly, his arms hung limp in their restraints and his feet relaxed, slumped on the concrete floor. Edward!, Victoria lifted his chin and his tear stained face was so peaceful, so dormant. He is one great actor. Even Raven walked over to check him, concerned. SEE?!, I shouted, Hes just waiting to get you, one way or another! He told me to play along and that hed let us go once you were taken care of! But I never trusted him! Go ask Jasper if you dont believe me!, I said, Hes still upstairs, waiting for James! My necklace is a bug James gave me! Jasper is listening! Victoria snatched the necklace off my neck and looked at it. Then she looked at James, a deadly stare. You fuck!, she raged and hit James across the face with the iron cane. He went down on the first blow, his real dose of sedatives taking effect along with the crushing strike of the cane. One down. Two to go. James laid in a heap on the floor, twitching for a moment before going completely still.

Watch them!, Victoria pointed at Raven with the cane, Ill be right back! She tore out the dungeon door and walked into the hallway, ordering the two men out there to follow her. She was going after Jasper. The necklace and bug went with her, in her hand, so we were off the record right now. Edward stayed asleep, playing his part to perfection as Raven shoved me away from him, jealously, tapping his face, trying to awaken him. Come on, baby, wake up., she coaxed, You have to stand or you could hurt your arms and legs, please You should lower him down maybe., I suggested, Let him lay down until he wakes up. Yea., she looked up at his wrists and winced to herself, going to his lever and slowly cranking his hook down, eventually laying him on the floor on his back. It was beautiful the way he never tensed, his body always limp and still as she lowered him. Even I believed he was unconscious. Raven went to the corner of the room and came back with water, spilling some onto her own hands, gliding the cool water onto Edwards forehead and cheeks, trying to bring him around. I smiled down at her and after a moment or two, I said, You really seem to care for him, more than she does. I do!, she glanced up at me, cradling Edwards head in her lap, He loves me, too. But Victoria will never give him to me. We want to be together. You should have him, then., I said softly, Why wait for her to sell him to you? Just take him. Victorias going to jail, if she lives through this night. Edward will go to jail, too. Shell no doubt blame him for everything shes done. She has his blood somewhere. She can frame him and he could go to prison for life! Then youll never get him. Raven was looking down at his beautiful face, stroking it, thinking about it. Then she jerked her head up at me. Why should I believe you?, she squinted at me, Youre the one who saved him from my place! You care about him, too. Why would you tell me to take him now? I care about him, like you said., I breathed, Id rather see him with you than rot away in jail or dead. Victoria might kill him before hes even arrested. She could shoot him and James and blame the whole thing on the two of them, saying she was an innocent victim caught in the middle. Youre pretty cool., Raven smiled at me, Smart. Maybe Ill take you with us, too. I see my Edward likes you. I want a happy pet, not a sad one, like he is now. Thats the way to keep a pet, to make him happy. Then you never have to go through all this kind of drams. If I take him, would you come too? Would you be my pet, too? I didnt see that coming. But it works. I smiled, surprised, Really? Yes., she smiled affectionately. I thought Id see Edward tense up but he never did.

I would like being with Edward, even as a fellow submissive. And you do seem like a kind mistress., I thought aloud, A whole lot nicer than James. Well go to the other side of the world, to be safe., Raven added, I have my own place in Puerto Rico. No one would find us there. Youd get to play on the beach everyday, swim, its so beautiful there. I wouldnt be cruel to either of you. Yes., I answered firmly. How are we going to get Edward out of here?, Raven asked as she lowered the lever that held me up on my tiptoes. In seconds, I was standing on my feet again and she came over to unlock my cuffs. Edward rose up behind Raven then and, using his own chain between his cuffs, he had Raven by the neck. She gasped and tried to reach around behind herself to Edward but he had her. Tightening the chain slightly, he sneered, STOP! HOLD STILL! Take off the dress, now!, Edward ordered and I took a step towards him, seeing his eyes take on a wicked little glint. Edward., I said. He looked up at me and said, You need something to wear, Bella. Oh. Right. I crossed my arms over my breasts and Edward looked down at Raven who was fumbling, trying to breathe and get her dress off at the same time. Finally, it slipped off her waist and to the floor. Kick it towards Bella., he ordered with less venom now and Raven moved the dress away from herself and at me. I could bend down and pick it up without worrying about her kicking me in the face. Shoes, too., he added to Raven, but her shoes were very high heeled stilettos. I have shoes., I hurried myself into the dress and slipped my feet into my comfortable one inch heels. Raven had a bra and panties on, both purple with black trim. Edward took her over to the cage dangling from the ceiling and opened the door, pushing her inside it and closing it, locking the padlock to seal her inside. Heres a chair., I found one in the corner and moved it into the center of the room, Sit James over here. Edward had pulled himself away from glaring at Raven now and was yanking James up off the floor, carrying him to the chair and plopping him onto it, a nasty gash across his eye and the bone of his nose, blood on his face. Edward quickly took off his own cuffs and placed them on James wrists, pinning them behind him, lacing them through the chair. The plan is to wait here now., I said to Edward, putting another chair next to James, Jasper and Charlie went to help Emmett and theyll all bring Victoria down here.

Edward, dont listen to her., Raven was holding the bars of the cage, tears in her eyes as she watched us, Victorias gonna kill you both for this!! Please, just come with me! I can save you, Edward! Ill take good care of you, I swear! Shut up, Raven., Edward said through gritted teeth, ignoring her as he put his small leather thong back on, Shut up. Id rather die than go with you. She looked truly hurt now and I almost felt sorry for her. But I made myself block that out. Bella., Edward closed the distance between us and held me tight, his arms shivering again, Are you alright? Yea., I felt tears in my eyes again, pushing them away, My ass hurts a little, but other than that, Im fine. I put my arms around his back, loving the smooth, warm feel of him. Are YOU alright?, I asked, They hurt you more than me. Its nothing., he shrugged it off, holding my face and kissing my lips tenderly, Im fine. I should get real clothes before your father comes in here. I can just run to my room for a sec. NO!, I grabbed his arms, Dont! They could get you! Stay here! Alright, alright., he held me tighter to him as Raven glared at us from her cell. Oh, here!, I broke away from him and went to where James had taken off his shirt, handing it to him, Wear this. Okay., he quickly tore his arms into the sleeves, starting to button it, Thanks. Did I really drink something bad?, he asked, looking down at me, concerned. I dont think so., I looked at the dungeon door, making sure no one was coming in, I think Jasper said he wouldnt spike Victorias stuff because she tends to feed you from her plate, but Emmett made a weird face when she fed you her drink before, so Im not sure now. If I start to conk out, dont try to drag me along., he held my arms, looking at me sternly, Just get yourself out of here. I still cant believe youre here now! Whos plan was THIS?! Now he sounded angry. And I guess I would be, too, if I were him. All of ours., I answered, wishing hed lose his tense tone with me, The plan is to bring Victoria back in here, and get them to confess what they did. Give other names of victims. Tell where the remains are. That will be enough to get them behind bars. And you spiked their food!, he smiled a little, That was a stroke of genius! I peeked over at Raven and she was asleep now in the cage. I grinned. Its about time hers took effect. Maybe she only drank a little, she didnt eat much, either. That was Jaspers idea., I grinned, He seems to somehow know all about sedatives.

I went to the dungeon door, peeking out the crack. The door had been left open but I closed it nearly all the way, just in case someone on the other side came across this room. Oh, Ravens out., Edward noticed as he followed me with his eyes. Good., I huffed, She was getting on my nerves. She made that beach and ocean sound good, didnt she?, he teased, shaking his head, Shes a real manipulator. She could get Jesus himself to sell his soul to the devil. I dont see anyone out here yet., I worried aloud, Its been awhile. Where are they? I hope theyre alright., Edward worried with me, going over to the walls of the dungeon, taking things that might make good weapons for us, just in case. That was brilliant on his part, I thought with a sly smile. Me too., I said, My poor fatherhes never going to be the same after hearing all that. Im sure if he was fighting during that scene, it was just making him more and more dangerous to his opponent. Hes never going to forgive me., Edward handed me a large whip with jagged, sharp metallic links of chain hanging from it, Not that he should. Its all my fault that even had to happen to you. He frowned at himself and I turned to him, frowning too. Hey., I said in a harsh voice, Stop that self loathing shit. Im not Dr. Bella at the moment. Well handle your therapy later, deal? His smile nearly peeked out then. Deal., he agreed. We waited for another ten minutes and nothing. I was trembling and nearly crying when I had to admit the truth. Somethings wrong., I looked at Edward, They shouldve been here by now. We need to find them. And Rosalie and Alice, too. Theyre here TOO?!, Edward frowned again, hurting my stomach, JESUS, BELLA!! Did you need to risk everyones life in this?! Im amazed my parents arent here, too! I looked down, not enjoying him yelling at me. ARE THEY?!, he asked. NO!, I turned to him, crying now, Dont YELL at ME!! He sighed. Im sorry, Bella, Im sorry., he held me, kissing my forehead, Im sorry. What should we do? We cant use James as a hostage if Victoria has them., I thought aloud, She thinks hes her enemy now. She wont care if we hurt him. Raven means nothing to her, either. She wants me., Edward said, You can use me as a hostage if you want.

No way., I cringed, just thinking about it, Risking you is not part of the plan. Well, can you think up something better?, he asked. 33. EPOV You should cuff me and take me out there in case she has your father or something., I repeated but she spun to me, her eyes angry and wild. NO!, she shouted, NO! I wont do that, Edward! I never want you in cuffs again, even as a trick against Victoria. Ill throw up if she gets her hands on you again. Same old stubborn little Bella. God, how I love her. God damn it, I missed you Bella., I smiled at her as she grinned back and then peeked out the crack of the dungeon door again, I told Charlie to take you to Forks. I thought I wouldnt see you again. When I was kneeling next to Victorias chair, I was nearly in a little comaI thought my life was over. I had nothing left. Then I smelled you. For a minute, I thought it was my mind playing with meand then I heard your name. Then I remembered how stubborn you areand I thought, God, Im stupid. Charlie would never get her to go to Forks. Not while Im still here. Is this a therapy session?, she turned to me, wanting to hear more but reminding me we didnt have time for this right now. Lives of people we loved were out there, in jeopardy, or worse. We had to go out there and face itnow. When did I become this chatterbox? I used to never talk about meand now I couldnt shut myself up. No, this is me ranting because I havent had anyone to talk to for three days., I sighed, Wellif you wont use me as your hostage, whats the plan, then? I dont have a plan., Bella took a breath, Sometimes there is no elaborate plan when things go wrong. We just have to be brave and go out there and see whats happening. And do what we can to help. Bella still held the brutal whip I had given her. Well, this is a good weapon I gave you., I informed, It literally can shred flesh with each blow, even a light one. Ive got the chain whip, which is dangerous but not as bloody as yours will be. Well, were okay if they dont have guns., she scoffed, And they probably do. I dont think shell shoot., I offered, The club is open and full of customers. But then again, she is a psycho. Helpful, Edward., she smirked at me. Sorry., I frowned at the floor. But she took my hand and squeezed it, making my eyes raise up to meet hers. They were two beautiful orbs filled with fear and excitementand even lovefor me. How does she combine all those together in one stare?

Stop saying sorry., she whispered, Just be with me. Be with me now. Be with me when Im 70 Ill be with you forever, Bella., I whispered back, meaning it with my whole heart. Okay., she took a brave breath, Time to face our first obstaclethe psycho bitch. We can do it., I stated confidently, kissing her knuckles softly, a little kiss for luck. We would need it. We both knew that anything could happen once we left this room. Lives could end, blood could be shed, relationships could be forever changed. But for now, in this moment, we loved each other completely, and were willing to face Hell itself to be together. We were ready to go to battle for this love. So many times Id see movies where the couple had to fight for their future together. I used to be so jealous of them. I never got a chance to fight to save Tanya. I was too late. But I have the chance now to fight for Bella and meand Katie. I would not let them down. Id give everything I have for them. Even if I lose, Ill go down swinging. Ready?, she steeled herself as she looked at me. Ready., I gave a single nod, feeling like a knight about to go meet a dragon. Bella began to pull open the dungeon door and then I caught myself. Hey!, I pulled her back as I moved to the door, Im the man, I should be in front. You stand behind me. Dont make me yell at you now, Edward., she gave me a nudge with her arm, This isnt the fifties. We walk side by side. Partners. I felt my smile grow across my face. Yes, Bella. She growled, hating my slave response. It wasnt really that. I could hear myself saying yes, Bella to her for the next hundred years. This time, Id be the most whipped husband on earthand the most happy one. We crept out, holding onto each others arms as we began our silent, dark walk into the jet black hallway. Someone turned off the lights above usand you could hear a pin drop. I suddenly felt like I was in some horror movie, and that the zombies were about to come tearing out at us at any moment. Suddenly, my chain whip didnt seem like that much of a threat anymore. Rosalie has your gun, loaded. Bella whispered in the dark, Wish I had it now. You dont want to shoot anyone, Bella., I whispered back. Im not so sure anymore., she said as we neared the stairs going up. Killer Swan., I tried to lighten the fear a little, but she didnt laugh. I see a little light ahead., she said, almost inaudibly. I hardly made it out.

We were in the next hallway, on the way to the door to the dining room wed been in a little while before. It wasnt totally dark now, the light from the dining room was leaking into the hall we were in. It was so eerily quiet. I hated it. Get a grip, Edward, get tough. If you want to live through this, find brave real fast. Now. No ones in there?, Bella whispered extremely softly as I looked through the cracked open door to the dining room. I saw the table, the dishes, the food, drinksbut not one single person. Hell, it didnt even look like any fight happened here. Everything was just as we left it. I dont think so., I said, checking behind us, slightly paranoid. Of course, Victoria could be waiting right against the wall beside the door, waiting for us with a gun in her hand. But I didnt tell Bella that. Im sure she knows the danger, too. I shoved the door open hard, slamming it into the wall behind us as Bella gave a little yelp of surprise. I had my whip up behind me, ready to strike if I needed to. I saw no one. Im sure Jasper wasnt waiting around in the kitchen, mixing drinks after we were taken away. Victoria had forgotten about him in the struggle. I could hear the music now, coming from the nearby club. There was no soundproofed walls here. I let a cleansing breath out of my lungs, relieved for now, but knowing, also, that they were around here somewhere, hidingwaiting. Maybe they lost Victoria and her men in the crowds of the club. Maybe theyre hiding out in a private room. There were dozens of them. It would be a great place to lay low for a while. Then, just as I opened the door that left the dining room, into the hallway going towards the club, we heard it. Louder than Hell, it was the fire alarm, blaring and piercing into the air. Bella winced, holding her hands over her ears as I heard women screaming, thundering footsteps running for their lives. Then, like an angry demon shouting from the sky, Victorias voice on the microphone. OUT, EVERYBODY, OUT!!, she screamed, FIRE!! FIRE IN THE KITCHEN!! OUT!! Shit., I groaned, peeking out the next door that looked out into the club. Women were running out the doors, panicked. I never saw the place clear out so fast. Even the dancers were leaving. Pretty smart, Vic., I sneered to myself, under my breath, She just cleared the place out. Now the only people in here are herand all of us. No witnesses. A few people were coming out of the private rooms now, half dressed, and I almost laughed out loud, picturing myself doing just that if I were working in there tonight. Part of me wanted to run out with the crowd, taking Bella out of here. But shed never leave, abandoning her father, Alice, Rosalie, EmmettJasper. She was too damn brave for her own good. I wished her father was a librarian instead of a

cop. He raised her to be strong and aware. She couldnt runeven if she wanted to. Victoria is out there, if she was speaking on the mike. I closed the door, locking it, sealing us in here. What are you doing?, Bella asked me, her brows creased. Thinking., I admitted honestly, then an idea hit me. The kitchen!, I pulled her with me back into the dining room, going to the kitchen door, Theres knives in therebutcher knives! Cleavers! Cool!, Bella followed quickly as we reached the kitchen door. I held her back a second and pushed my hand against the swing open door that had no window in it, unfortunately. Someone could be hiding in here, too. Slowly, the door crept open and as my eyes focused on the floor, I saw bodies and blood. I yanked back and the door closed in front of us. What? What?!, Bella hissed, starting to panic at my stiff expression. There are bodies in there., I tensed, glancing at her frightful eyes and added, Its okay. Its Victorias guys. Two of them, the ones who went after Jasper. God., Bella breathed, I didnt know Jasper was that dangerous. Yea., I agreed, just as surprised, now that I thought about it. Im okay., Bella took another breath, shoving my arm towards the door, Go ahead. Shes okay. What makes her think Im okay with it? Ive seen enough dead, bloody bodies for one lifetime. I wasnt excited to see more. But we had to go in there. Okay., I clenched my jaw, squinting as I pushed the door open firmly, swallowing as my eyes got a better look this time. The first man laying there was on his back, wearing a black suit, white shirt that was now mostly red. His eyes were wide open and surprised, his skin tan. He looked Spanish, with long black hair and a goatee. Two sharp knives stood up in his chest, close to each other, near the heart area. The entire blade was embedded insideonly the shiny black handles could be seen. I hope there are more knives somewhere else. Im not pulling those out. Bella was less affected than I was, obviously, because she said, Gun! She pointed to the second man, a few feet away, an older man with a gray crew cut and large arms. His face was burned. Jasper probably threw something boiling and hot into his face in the fight. He had a ghastly slice across his neck and a knife in his chest. Damn! I wanna be partners with Jasper., Bella breathed, I think she was kidding. But as my irate stare turned and touched her, she blushed a little. Sorry., she clung tighter to my arm as we hovered in the doorway.

Sorry youre stuck with me., I huffed and she sighed. I didnt mean that., she said, sounding regretful. Stop., I said, not angry, I want Jasper, too. She shoved me a little, coaxing me to start going into the kitchen. Lets go., she suggested, Get the gun. There was blood all over the floor and I had no shoes on. Shit! Come on, man, be like Jasper, I told myself. Make Bella glad shes your partner. I forced my foot inside and on the floor, right into a warm, wetness beside the first man in front of us. UCCKKK!!! I kept my disgust inside as I took another step, moving around the corpse as much as I could, Bella following me, wearing her shoeslucky. We neared the man with the gun in his hand. I know nothing about guns, all I could see was that it was silver and very modern looking, not some old fashioned six shooting revolver. This thing looked wicked. Look out!, Bella warned as I began to reach for it, Thats a 9 millimeter. Automatic. You take it, partner., I put my hand up, This is your department. I had no problem letting her take over in this. The only guns I had seen were the ones those loan sharks had beat me withand that was in the dark alley. I didnt even know how to load these, let alone shoot them. I had been a pet, not a hired thug. Im sure that was another reason I never saw her guards or got to hang around or talk to them. She didnt want me knowing weapons. Then I could rise up someday and use one against her. She sheltered me, making me almost useless in a fight like this. She handed me her whip and bent down to take the gun out of the dead mans hand. This wasnt pleasant for her and she shivered as the fingers wouldnt let go of the gun. I leaned down and used the whip handle to force his fingers apart and the gun was free for her to take. Thanks., she looked at me, slightly embarrassed. I have to be good for something, right?, I tried to grin, but Im sure I didnt. She handled the gun like an expert, moving the sliding part to the rear of the gun, and I saw a silver bullet sitting there. Its loaded., she held the gun away from us, to the floor and pushed that part back into place with a metallic click. Then she did something that made a long silver piece drop out of the handle. Whats that?, I glanced behind me, the door was still and no one was coming yet. The magazine., she instructed, This holds all the bullets. You know what a bullet is, right?

She tried to snicker at me but I know I frowned back at her. Have I told you yet how much fun it is, being your partner, Bella?, I retorted. Im kidding, Jeez!, she turned the silver thing to show me the bullets sitting inside it, stacked up one on top of the other, See, theres like ten rounds in here. This one holds 15. Hes fired five shots. I was glad to be a student now and not the Barney Fife she had made me out to be a moment ago. I had to admit I was jealous of what she knew that I didnt. How her father shared things with her when mine didnt. I cant think of one damn thing Carlisle ever took a moment to teach me. But then, I thought of Joseph and felt better right away. If playing piano or fixing a car would save us somehow, Id be the star of this climax. Bella looked around as she clicked the silver magazine back into the handle of the gun. Onetwo, she pointed at black holes in wall and ceilingbullet holes. Three!, I pointed near the stove, finding one, proud of myself for helping finally. Did I mention I was still toe deep in blood at the moment? Four, Bella pointed at the door leaving the kitchen going out to the bar inside the club area. We looked around for bullet five but never saw it. I got the awful feeling in my stomach that someone had gotten hurt. Maybe bullet five was inside one of our friends Bella looked at me and had a shiny mist in her eyes that said the same thing I was thinking. I wished myself braver, tougher. I prayed for all of us as I put the chain whip down, keeping the shredder whip in my right hand as Bella grabbed for my left and we stepped over the body, moving towards the door ahead of us. The club music was silent and there were no more sounds of running or voices screaming. The place was empty and I was about to suggest looking in the private rooms when Victorias voice rose up on the microphone. Edward Cullen., she seethed and we froze in our tracks. Come out right now or I swear to God, Ill have your daughters head in two hours., she was lethal in her tone. Something in me almost moved me right through the door but Bella flung her arm around me, stopping me as I began to sweat and tremble. Victoria knew my number and I hated that. Edward., she called like I was a child, Im not kidding and you know that. Call out if you cant come to me. Now. Edward., Bella pushed me to the wall and covered my mouth with her hand. I wasnt going to call out, even though I wanted to spare my daughter, but I couldnt risk Bella, either. But Bella knows how I love Katie and she didnt want

me to do something Id regret. I couldnt be angry at her for that. Besides all that, Bellas hand over my mouth turned me on. God, I need therapy. He cant call our or come!!, Bella shouted, Hes dead!! Your fuck brother SHOT him in the head!! I looked at her, and she pushed me aside, pointing to an empty cabinet. I stopped and shook my head at her, not wanting to hide in there while every one else was risking their lives for me. Partners, you said., I whispered. Was I not a good partner? Maybe I was a weak link. I felt so useless at that moment. Bella gritted her teeth and looked at the door. Her back was to the wall behind it, waiting for Victoria to enter now that Bella had marked our location by shouting. It wasnt a bad idea, making her think I was dead. Even if she got away, shed never try to find me again, or my family. I could move them all somewhere else. But I didnt want Bella alone, risking her life while I hid in a pantry. If she got hurt, I could never forgive myselfor have a real life afterwards. It had to have her in it, my ending to this whole saga. Without her, my freedom was meaningless. You LIE!!, Victoria screeched, sounding very upset and I heard heavy breathing from her as processed that information. EDWARRRDDDD!!!!, she roared as I cringed, the sharpness slicing into my eardrums, COME OUT, NOW!! THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE!! DEAD OR NOT, ILL HAVE YOUR BRAT!! ILL KEEP HER AS MY PET IN YOUR PLACE UNTIL THE DAY SHE DIES!!! Ill teach her how to suck cock, just like I taught YOU!! I grabbed a knife handle out of a wooden block beside me and it whooshed through the air as I gladly welcomed the sight of its long, razor sharp blade. Before I knew what I was doing, I was nearly at the door, shoving it, when Bella pushed me down and flew out the door, her gun in hand as the door swung closed and open while I laid there, watching her statuesque stance as she pointed the gun towards the stage. I TOLDYOU, hes dead !!, Bella sounded so real when she said that, like she was almost crying. Maybe she can act, after all. I had to help her somehow. I took my giant knife and went the other way, my red feet dodging the bodies again, going into the empty dining room so I could come around and see Victoria from the other side. Maybe I could make her turn towards me so Bella could get her. I dont see any blood on you., Victoria was saying to Bella as I entered the dining room. I wish we werent the good guys. I wish Bella would just shoot her in the leg or something. But then I thought, maybe Victoria has a gun, too. Holding it on Bella, waiting for the first opportunity to strike. Victoria knows guns, too. I didnt like this. I had to get in this.

I couldnt hear what Bella was saying as I opened the door into that hallway that lead into the club. But I had bigger problems now. Sir Kevin was behind the door, staring back at me, sternly. No., I jerked back as he stood his ground. I didnt know what it was about this guy, but he was like my kryptonite. I felt weak the moment I saw his face. I felt nauseous. I had almost forgotten my knife and then I held it up, warning him not to come near me. Sorry I was late., he kept his firm stare on me, I missed all the fun. Stay away from me., I growled, ghastly memories ripping through my mind. He took a step towards me, clearly unafraid as I took a step back, swallowing as my stomach began to boil acidly. Edward, he was in his dominant mode now, it seemed, Put that down and come with me. We both know youre as gentle as a lamb. This isnt you. Come on, youre just going to hurt yourself. Come now and there will be no punishment, I promise. He extended a hand at me and I swiped the air with my blade, not making contact with him. I said leave me alone!, I shouted, getting more and more pissed off. He kept coming towards me. Angel, he softened his voice a bit, Youre going to be mine now. Lets not begin this way. Be nice and come with me. Stay away from me!, I gritted through my teeth, again, near the table. I improvised and threw a couple of plates at him. This only pissed him off. So be it., he frowned and lunged at me. In seconds, my back was on the floor and he was on me, grabbing the wrist of the hand that held the knife. I struggled with all I had, and we were wrestling. He had both his hands around my wrist and I was trying to free my hand to stab him. Id go for his face.it was right above mine. I could even smell his fucking peppermint breath. Come on, baby, Sir Kevin gritted his perfect white teeth, almost having full control of my arm, Drop it. I dont want to hurt you, but I will. FUCK YOU!!, I screamed, trying to fight back harder. I spit up into his face and he clenched his eyes and his grip on my wrist weakened. I was about to lurch the knife at him. Then something cool and hard pressed into my right eye as I froze. It was Victoriastanding over me and holding the barrel of her gun against my eye. Oh, look, Edward lives! You look pretty good for a dead man.., Victorias voice was low and deep. Fuck!

STOP!, I heard Bellas voice now, coming out of the kitchen where I had just come from. Bella, Victoria sounded triumphant, My gun is in Edwards eye. I dare you to shoot. You wont hurt him., Bellas voice was shaky as Sir Kevin yanked the knife out of my hand, standing up and running a hand back through his hair and wiping at his face as he looked down at me, disappointed and disgusted. I wont kill him, but I will hurt him., Victoria stated, I can shoot him through the cheeks. She moved the barrel of her gun to my cheekbone as Sir Kevin held my chest down with his boot. He wont be perfect anymore but hed still be mine., Victoria thought aloud, Maybe that is better. No girls would look at him twice ever again. Bella just let out a helpless breath and I almost cried out, hating that I was putting her in this danger. She could shoot and get out of here if it werent for me. Maybe I could shoot his hands., Victoria shoved the gun over my right palm now, No more pianono silly little dreams of being a doctor someday Or maybe Ill just shoot him in the cock., Victoria stuck the gun between my legs and I growled, It would be a tragedy. Then he wont have any reason to keep going. And you wont have any reason to want him anymore. Victoria, I began but then she shoved the barrel into my mouth, suddenly enraged. SHUT UP!!, she howled, SHUT THE FUCK UP!! I SAVED YOUR LIFE!! I TOOK YOU IN!! I TAUGHT YOU EVERYTHING!! I TAUGHT YOU TO SURVIVE IN THIS FUCKED UP WORLD!! I MADE IT SO YOUR PRECIOUS FREAK DAUGHTER COULD LOOK LIKE A HUMAN BEING AGAIN!! I TOOK CARE OF YOU!! I MADE YOU BEAUTIFUL!! I GAVE YOU A PLACE TO LIVE!! I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING!! EVERYTHING!! I LOVED YOU! And you never loved me back!! You lied! WHY?!! WHY?!! NAME ME ONE THING I DIDNT GIVE YOU, EDWARD!! ONE THING!! She yanked the gun out of my mouth and took a step back, trying to compose herself as the gun rested against my forehead now. I couldnt find it in me to be afraid of her anymore. Now, she just looked sick and brokenand pathetic. I just want to go home., I said, staring right back up at her, as honest as I could be. I heard Bella give a frightened little breath after I said that. Maybe she thought Victoria would kill me now. I even thought it for a moment, too. You are home, Edward., she said, letting a tear fall down her cheek, looking at Sir Kevin, saying to him, Hes yours. The FUCK HE IS!!, Bella sneered, Who are YOU, anyway?!! She was talking to Sir Kevin. Oh no, dont tell her.

Im Edwards master, thats who I am, little girl., he answered, grabbing my hair and yanking me to my feet, Victorias gun pressed against my cheek, holding Bella off. I was shoved into the wall, face first, my hands brought up tight behind me. Alright, fine, I didnt struggle, Then let Bella go. You have no reason to hurt her now. Oh, wrong., she scoffed, James or you told this little bitch everything about me. We have business to take care of before you pack. No, dont!, I struggled a little as Sir Kevins hands pushed me harder into the wall, one of his hands playing with the back of my hair. Relax, angel. Sir Kevin pulled me by the arm now, Your part in this is mostly over. I looked at Bella and Sir Kevin had the knife again that he took away from me. He wasnt threatening me with it, though, yet. Drop the gun., Victoria ordered Bella, cocking her trigger as she held her gun to my temple. I looked at the floor, hating myself. I lost the fight for her. I am useless. No, dont give up. There still might be a chance to save ourselves. And for the first time in my life, because of BellaI had hope. Even when there was no reason to hope. After a tense moment, Bella sighed and tossed her gun to the floor. Kick it over here., Victoria demanded nextand Bella obeyed. See, she can be obedient., Sir Kevin smiled, You just need the right tool. Take him onto the stage. Victoria said to Kevin as he gently moved me by the arm out into the hallway and into the club, towards the empty stage. I glanced behind me and Bella was following us, Victoria trailing behind her with the gun pointed at her back. Listen, I tried to say to Victoria as I stood on the stage, Bella doesnt really know anything about Jason Whiteshe has no proof or anythingthats the whole reason for tonight. And I blew the plan. She cant prove anything, Victoria. Just let her go. A couple of chairs were being brought onto the stage by Sir Kevin and he slammed me down by the shoulder into one of them. Have a seat, Bella., Victoria didnt touch her but Bella sat down anyway. Bella glanced at me, trying to formulate a new plan, just as I was trying to do the same. Victoria intended to kill Bella. Shed have to kill me first. I thought to myself. Jasper is here. Emmett is here. Charlie is here. Alice and Rosalie, too, but I hoped they would say hidden. I dont think Victoria knows theyre here. And she doesnt know about Charlie, either. Victoria took the microphone off its stand and spoke into it.

Any luck yet anyone?, she asked calmly. Not yet., a mans voice shouted from the area of the private rooms. Doors were slamming and it sounded like a couple of her guys were hunting. I looked around, wondering where else they could be hiding. Victoria turned to Sir Kevin and were talking quietly as I peeked up at the glass window of Victorias office. It was dark inside but I could see a blue shine from where the computer was on her desk. Rosalie and Alice are probably in there, maybe under Victorias desk or something. I looked away, not wanting to alert her to this. Check the dungeon, too., Victoria said into the mike, Leave my brother and Raven where they are. Ill deal with them later. Victoria went to the bar with Sir Kevin and she was pouring him a drink while they waited to have Emmett and Jasper brought out. I fucked up, Bella., I breathed, Im sorry. Its not your fault., she answered in a whisper, I shouldve shot her when I had the chance. I justcouldnt. Its my fault. Bella is a human being and shes apologizing for it. How did she get mixed up in this sick place? I think Alice and Rose are in Vics office., I shared, I can see the computer is on from here. I dont know where my Dad could be., Bella jumped a little as the private room doors kept slamming after being searched, Maybe Jasper took Emmett out of here. They wouldve been caught if they left., I thought out loud. A few minutes later, the two men Victoria had previously ordered to beat Emmett up walked over to the bar and were talking to Kevin and Victoria. Whos this new guy?, Bella asked me, hardly turning her head towards me, Why is he so anxious to own you now? I frowned and swallowed the bile that was rising in my chest. I didnt want to tell her. I didnt want to lie to her. He likes me., I shrugged, I guess. Who doesnt?, she eyed the men with Victoria. If we survive this, Ill tell Dr. Bella all about it, hows that?, I asked, putting the humiliation off for now. Bella gave me a strange look and then looked down, muttering, Alright. Maybe she figured it out herself. Shes a bright girl. And now I feel even more repulsive. I dont think they can find em., I squinted at the men, watching the way they looked so nervous and the way Victoria looked so pissed. Sir Kevin couldnt care less. He was smiling and drinking his drink, celebrating. I shivered all over,

imagining belonging to Sir Kevin from now on. Suicide was looking better and better to me if we didnt make it out of this. Then Victoria stood up and came over to us, cocking her gun and taking the microphone from its stand. Sir Kevin came and was standing behind my chair, a black marble cane in his hand that he held under my chin, securing my head to his chest as Victoria spoke into the mike. Alright., she announced as I looked at Bella, EmmettJasperI know youre out there somewhere, hiding like rats. Im going to count to five. If you dont show yourselves and surrender, I am going to shoot one of Bellas toes off. One of Victorias smelly men came up behind Bellas chair and held her back by her hair, making her look straight up as the other man grabbed her shoe and pulled it off, placing his gun to Bellas big toe, against the floor. NO!, I yelled as Bella tried to fight back in her chair. Then I looked at Victoria and felt Sir Kevins cane tighten against my Adams apple, blocking a little air. One, she began, TwoThree Suddenly, a huge crash rang out from overhead and shards of glass came raining down like angry teethVictorias antique wooden desk flew through the tinted glass wall of her office and was hurling straight down upon us. Sir Kevin was gone in a half second and so was his cane around my neck. The man holding Bella ran and so did Victoria. I turned towards Bella and held her, diving off the stage into the audience as the heavy desk crashed down upon the stage hard, breaking and splintering, wood flying up into the air as gunshots showered down right along with the crushed desk. Shots were fired back up at Victorias broken glass wall and it was only when I began to stand up again, a couple feet from the desk debris, that I had a good view above me. I looked up and could see Jasper, Emmett and Charlie near the broken glass, all with guns in hand, shooting. I couldnt see the girls at all and I was glad. Theyd better be somewhere safe out of the line of fire. Sir Kevin stood up to reach out for me, his cane still in hand, when Charlie fired, shattering the marble cane with his bullet!! What an awesome shot!! The cane crumbled like a cookie and Sir Kevin shouted and turned away from us, racing to get behind the bar for cover, along with Victoria. Bella, get out of there!!, Charlie screamed like a bear from above, Take cover! Bella crawled and shoved at me until we were under a long table in the audience, a white tablecloth covered it so for a moment we were hidden. Victoria and Sir Kevin were behind the bar and she was firing up at them from a sideways angle that they didnt expect. I heard Jasper shout, Watch it! And then a few more shots from above came down, sprinkling the bar, hitting a couple of bottles on the counter, glass and booze exploding. Sir Kevin looked like he was just sitting on the floor behind the bar, letting Victoria handle it alone.

I heard a man scream out and then land with a heavy thud on the stage. One of Victorias guysdown. One left. Yea!, I spat out. A minute later, as the shots rang back and forth like thunder, Victorias man stepped back, unaware he was only a couple feet away from Bella and I. Stay here., I whispered, glancing at her before I leapt on the guy, hearing Bella scream out as I made quick work of him, grabbing his head and snapping it around with one liquid movement, shoving him face down and taking his gun as Bella ran over to me. I jerked her behind me and grabbed the nearest table, shoving it over on its side and getting us to the floor behind it, blocking us from the bar now as the shots overhead paused during all this. Good MAN, EDWARD!, I heard Charlie shout and then heard Emmetts booming laugh. Suddenly, I was a man. A man worth something. I was one of the good guys, someone Bella could count on and be proud of, like she was proud of Charlie. Here!, I grabbed a Jack Daniels bottle from the floor and handed it to her. Good idea, time for a drink!, she trembled but grinned at me as I kept an eye on the bar. Victoria was still shooting, but not as wildly as before. She was being careful now and I suspected she was low on bullets. Soon we could all surround the bar and get themand this would all be over. No, this way., I turned the bottle around so she was holding the end of it, the bottle part up in the air, Just in case. How did you DO that, Edward?, Bella asked, stunned. I told you Emmett taught me some things., I said, watching as more shots were exchanged between Victoria and the three men above. I went to take a shot at Sir Kevin but the gun clicked, empty. Crap! What are the odds of that guy using the very last bullet just as I jumped him? No fair! Sorry, Clint., Bella smirked as I frowned, sighing, jipped out of the chance to fire my gun. Then it happened. A shot rang out, I couldnt tell from who, until I heard a deep voice yell out and a split second later, almost in slow motion, a body was falling from Victorias officeand landed hard on a table, breaking it, laying in a heap on the floor. DADDY!!, Bella tore from me, tossing the bottle aside and racing over to him. She wasnt even paying attention to the gunfire going on as I screamed her name. Without even thinking about it, I went after her, knowing Victoria was probably drooling at the sight of Bambi right in front of her, unprotected. NO, EDWARD!, Jasper yelled as I reached Bella, who was sitting on the floor next to Charlie.

I laid right over her, forcing her down and tucking my head into her hair as shots banged out again. I didnt feel anything much, I was listening to Bellas blood chilling scream underneath me as I shielded her. Victoria!!, I heard Sir Kevin bellow, Thats MINE! Its not MY fault he jumped in the way!, she was arguing back. Edward!, Bella screamed, pushing me and rolling me over onto my back as she tore my shirt open, Oh my God! What?, I asked as she clamped her hand over my shoulder, and thats when I felt the blood on my skin, the burn in my flesh, the dizziness in my head. EDWARD!!, Bella sobbed, putting pressure on the hole in between my shoulder and chest, NO! NO!! Enough of this shit!, Victoria was standing over us now, gun pointing at Bella and Charlie, whose eyes were closed as he breathed heavily, Get DOWN HERE, BOTH OF YOU!! NOW!! Throw your guns down first!!, she screamed, Good! Now move it! I was feeling weaker and weaker as the seconds rolled by and I fought to stay alert. I had to be there for Bella. I couldnt imagine her distress, having both me and Charlie laying on both sides of her, both hurt. Sir Kevin was behind Victoria, looking angry and grabbed me by the wrists as Bella growled and yanked me back towards her. Dont TOUCH him!!, she screamed, defending me once more. But another brutal yank and I was on the floor, being turned around, Sir Kevin was dragging me by my ankles and my arms felt numb for a minute, laying there above me as he slowly moved me away from Bella and Charlie, making a bloody red line behind me, warm wetness pouring out of meoozing from my back. I winced and panted, not wanting to goI could hear Bella crying as I laid there, a few feet away. I fought to keep my eyes openthe darkness around us was so soothing and all I wanted to do now is sleep. But I resisted it. If I fell asleep now, Id wake up in Sir Kevins cage, days laterand Id be told that Bella and Charlie were dead. I growled, hardly able to move, letting the anger keep me awake as Sir Kevin yanked a cloth napkin from a table on the right, pouring a bottle from the bar onto it, and kneeling at my side, moving my shirt out of the way as he applied the wet cloth into the bloody hole, cleaning it. I screamed out loud, against my will, the alcohol like evil flames inside the wound. I felt my back arch up as Bella screamed, hurting as much as I was. STOP IT!!, she shrieked at Sir Kevin, Dont HURT HIM!! Sir Kevin held me down securely and ignored Bella. But I heard Victoria. Stop defending HIM!, Victoria sneered, Worry about YOU! Hell live to see tomorrow, you wont! RRRRRRRR!!!!, I struggled furiously, hating it that I couldnt be with Bella to protect her.

Sir Kevin wet the cloth again with the booze and moved it around to my back, cleaning and burning the hole where the bullet had entered me. I howled out again, savage gasps coming out of me as he gripped my hand. Its alright, Angel., he assured, Hold onto me. Youll be alright. I wont let anything happen to you, I swear. Bella!, I groaned out, yanking my hand out of his, Bella! Forget her., Sir Kevin said callously, holding another clean napkin over the hole in my chest.

BPOV I could hardly form words as I watched this Sir Kevin creep touching my Edward. I held my fathers hand, glad to see he was still breathing. I quickly looked him over. He had a bloody leg and I could see a hole above his knee that was gushing. I slipped his belt off him and used it as a tourniquet, looping it around his leg, above the hole, pulling on it tight as Charlie gave a loud scream but hardly moved at all. He was laying on the broken pieces of wood that was once a table and I pushed some of the debris away from Charlie, wondering if his back was brokenif his neck was brokenhe could be dieing right now. And so could Edward. Who knows what veins or major arteries that bullet couldve hit? He could bleed to death right before our eyes! And I cant even reach him now! I heard him calling my name and wanted to split myself in two. I wanted Edward but I couldnt leave my father. Emmett and Jasper were coming towards us now, unarmed, and I shivered more. Would she shoot them now? Would they suffer? Would they die? I still cant believe it, Emmett!, Victoria scolded her once favorite dancer, looking at him in disgust, What the hell were you thinking?! Forget him!, Jasper sneered with venom now, You murdered my brother, you bitch! And I wanna know WHY!! Your brother?, she smirked, Who? Jason White!, he shook with uncontrollable rage, Charlie told me the whole story!! You chopped him into little pieces!! You ATE parts of him! I knew it. I just didnt have proofuntil now. Your brother, it figures., she squinted, keeping her gun pointed at me, A stupid little boy thinking he could be a sub! He couldnt even get hard! He was useless! But he served a purpose when I used him to put Edward in place. I guess everyone is good for something! Jasper clenched his fists and wanted to attack but he held himself back, seeing that I was being threatened now. And what proof do you have?, Victoria huffed, You have nothing!

Wrong., Jasper grinned, I have a cloth full of blood that at this moment is in the hands of the NYPD. I told them the whole story, gave them my journals of everything Ive seen and heard since I started working here. Theyre no doubt on their way here right now, especially after all the gunfire. Bullshit., Victoria frowned, Cloth of bloodthere is no blood.Edward cleaned it all She flew over to where he was laying, with Sir Kevin still tending his wound and shouted, Stand him up! No, Victoriahes bleed, Sir Kevin began to say and then she pointed her gun at HIS face. STAND HIM UP!, she screamedand Sir Kevin carefully brought him to his bare feet, letting him lay back against his chest and the bar at the same time. Hes drifting in and out of consciousness, Vic!, Sir Kevin argued, angry with her for causing his new pet any discomfort. Edwards head was falling back limply as Victoria picked up a drink that was half full, from a customer before the fire drill, and she threw the contents of the glass into Edwards face. He coughed and his eyes opened. His hands tried to grab the bar counter for support at his sides as Victoria grabbed his chin in her hand, making him look her in the eye. You fucked me!!, she accused, YOU! Not James!! Say it! Say it, you fucking WHORE! I fucked you, Victoria., he said, his eyes exhausted but glaring at her anyway, For once, I fucked you! And Im glad! I dont love you. I never have. You stole my life! You kept me away from my daughter! How could I ever love you? Enough, Edward., Sir Kevin tried to stop him before Victoria hurt his slave anymore, Come on, Im taking you home. At that, Sir Kevin began to pick Edward up but Victoria wasnt through with him yet. My fathers finger poked my hand twice and I darted my eyes to him. He looked back at me, smirking and very slowly and quietly, he cocked his pistol. I gave him a slight nod, moving back an inch to get out of his way. Emmett and Jasper saw this, too, and didnt make a move. At this, Victoria yanked up a heavy looking bottle and smashed it over Sir Kevins face, sending him down, knocked out as Edward almost fell over, too. But Victoria grabbed at his shirt and held him up against the bar. You cant think Id ever let anyone else take you away from me, Edward., she spoke softly now, sniffing, almost crying as she laid him back against the bar counter and began kissing his face, touching his lips with her gun. Edward let out a ragged breath, trying to turn his face away from her as she kept forcing her attentions on him.

I loved you!! I still do, she said, sounding bitter, rubbing the barrel of her gun into his chest wound as he groaned out loudly, trying to force her off him with his one good arm. Off in the distance, police sirens were approaching. Lots of them. They kept getting loudercloser. Im not going to prison again., she looked into Edwards eyes, wildly, cocking her gun, tracing the hot, bloody barrel along his bottom lip as he cringed slightly. Ill die first., she kissed Edwards mouth as he muffled back a yelp of protest. I always knew if it came to thisId kill myself before they could get me., she breathed over his face, I want you to come with me, my lovemy sweet little pet. I know you didnt mean what you just said. You were just confused. They turned you against me. But I knowyou still love me, Edward. Ill bring you with me. Youre still mine. This way, we can be together foreverwhere no one can get us. Edwards eyes went wide as she smiled down upon him, It wont hurt, sweet heart. I promise. First youthen Ill follow. She moved the gun, almost stroking his face with it, and she brought it to his forehead, right between his eyebrows. Wait., Edward looked at us slyly, his hand moving the gun away from his face, Kiss me first, one last time, before we go... He kissed her with an open mouth and thats when Charlie took his shot, being the honorable cop he was, he shot her in the leg, below the knee, sending her onto her ass as she screamed. Edward jerked away from her, holding the bar for support as I ran up to her, my fathers handcuffs in hand, ready to go. I yanked her gun out of her hand and slapped her across the face with it. Then I cuffed her wrist to the bottom golden bar where people would rest their feet while they drank here. I wanted to hurt her some more. She shot Edward, she shot my father! Before I knew it, I was kicking her in the stomach over and over again. Edward was laying his face on the bar, his one good hand holding the wound in his shaking, bloody palm. HEY, BELLA!!, Emmett grabbed me from behind, Stop! Stop! Come on, lets take care of Edward and Charlie. Come on. Now the sirens were close and Jasper was standing next to the bar, scowling at the woman hed been after for the last couple years. The woman who murdered his brother, with excruciating pain and terror. If I go down, Edward, youll go with me!!, Victoria threatened, I swear you will!! And your daughter, GONE!! Every day, youll have to wonder if shes ever coming back!! I can still have her raped and killed, even from jail! Youll see!! And then, when youre alone and have NOTHINGIll be back for you. Youll always be mine, EDWARD CULLEN! ALWAYS!! I was holding Edward up, walking him away from the bar as his one good arm held around my shoulder. Edward looked very pained at Victorias words, knowing they were true. He looked at me with a tortured expression, not saying a word,

tears in his eyes as I held him tighter. I wanted to tell him wed find a way. We could all move and hide, with Katie and Tanyas parents. Edward wasnt walking towards the door anymore. He hesitated, looking at her, and I could see terrible thoughts swirling behind those eyes. Emmett was trying to help my father up when Jasper unscrewed a bottle of vodkaand began pouring it over Victorias head, covering her chest and legs with it nextjiggling the empty bottle until the very last drop was upon her. Victoria growled and stared up at Jasper with hateful eyes, waiting. Emmett was the one to ask. Jazz, he stood, Charlie over his burly shoulder, What are you doin? You heard what she said., Jasper took another bottle and circled the bar, pouring liquor on the counter as he went, Shell get some hot shot lawyer and get off! They all do! And then shell come after Edwards kid and us, too! She deserves to die! You all know it! Not one of us said anything. We couldnt move. I hated the way I felt. I wanted her to die. I wanted her to burn. Dont do it, Jazz., Edward breathed, as if it hurt him to say the words, Your brotherwas a good kid. So are you. Dont do something thats going to make you a slave. Once its doneits done. It wont bring Jason back. Alice! Rose!!, Emmett called above him and the girls came running down the stairs from Victorias office, wearing their disguises, little mini dresses with heels, their wigs off now. Take him outside., Emmett said to them as Jasper eyed the candle that was sitting on the table on his right, The cops are out there. Just take him to the first car out there. The girls silently put their arms around Jasper and they slowly walked out of the front door of the club. Charlie made a horrible gurgling sound and I gasped, holding onto Edward as my eyes darted to Emmett. Im going!, he hurried out, glancing at us with a strange look as he went to take Charlie to the ambulance outside. We stood there and Victoria was soaking wet, stinking of booze and smiling wickedly up at us. Edwards not going to leave, Bella., she informed me, I can see it in his eyes now. Hes sick to death of the thought of taking a step out of here without getting my permission first. Youre wrong., I sneered back down at her, holding him tighter, Hes a lot stronger than you know. Hes finally free and hell never have to be anyones slave ever again. Hes going to live nowfinally. Hes going to have a good life. Far away from you. We began to walk away when she called to him one last time. EDWARD CULLEN!!, she screeched as he froze in place, his back to her now, Youre not allowed to leave! Im going to drink your daughters blood, Edward, if

you go. Ill cut her into pieces while you watch me, I swear it. If it takes me twenty years, Ill do it. My every thought, my every dreamwill be thatand I wont rest until I make it come true. Nowstay, boy. Sit! Edward sighed and looked at me, tears heavy in his eyes. He isnt free yet. And I can see that in his eyesso beautiful, magical, yet filled with this immense sadness that I can never fully erase. At least, not yet. Wait here a second., I leaned Edward against the vampire cage and he grabbed the outer bars for support, I want to talk to Vicky for a minute. Youve threatened him and his daughter for the last time, Victoria., I said calmly, I know itll do Edward great harm, in his mind, if he kills you. It would even be horrible for Jasper. I like to help people whose minds are troubled, whose hearts are hurting. I like to solve problems. But, never before have I come across someone who has no heartwhose mind is just too sick to curewho IS a problemone that has to be dealt withonce and for all. Until you. I picked up the candle from the table, using the holder to set it down upon the bar. It glowed in the dark room like an angelic lightI looked over at Edward and his eyes were staringshiningwith his silence his eyes answered mine. Yes, they said. I agreed. Ill lose no sleep over this, Victoria., I said, thinking of my father, thinking of Edward and his daughter, smiling and hugging each other, a future moment that had to happen, one that had waited for too long to come true. Edward would never be able to be free and happy as long as she livedneither would his daughter. For themfor their love and happiness, I do this now. Whatever the punishment, Ill gladly pay iteither in this lifeor the next. I hesitated once before when I couldve shot Victoria. And then she went on to shoot my father and Edward. I will not hesitate this time. I walked away from Victoria and she stared at me, not uttering a word, almost daring me, as if she wanted it. Without looking back at her, I looked at Edward, and we kissed each other with soft, quiet lips. In that moment, my mind was made up. And then I said , Goodbye, Victoria. And I turned, looking into her dark eyes one last time, and shoved the candle over, the little flame kissing the alcohol stained counterhissing out in hungriness. My father once told medont think about what youve had to killthink of what youve allowed to live. EdwardKatieJasperEmmettAliceRosalieCharliemeand the dozens of lives attached to all of thoseI chose them. We ran out of there as fast as we could, the sound of the rushing fire moving along the bar was the last thing I heard, along with Victorias final screams, cursing obscenities at us.

You cant RUN, EDWARD!!, she was still raging as we left, Even from Hell, I can reach YOU, EDWARD CULLEN!! I WILL FIND YOU AGAIN!! EDWARRRDDD!!! Even after we were outside in the darkness of the streets, surrounded by police cars and ambulances, Edward kept running, in his bloody bare feet. EDWARD!!, I chased him as he ran, my hand in his. He was still losing blood and him running wasnt helping matters any. EDWARD STOP!!, I finally yanked him by the hand, stopping at the end of the street, the club in the background now. He looked at me, his eyes so frightened, his breathing hard as his body trembled. Youre bleeding bad., I informed, the shirt sticking to his body, You need to come back so the medics can take care of you. Edward blinked and tears were moving down his face as he stared into my eyes, almost as if he were just waking up from a nightmare. Shhh, I held him to me, tight, my hands in the back of his hair, Its over. Shes gone. Shes gone, Edward. Youre free. You are free, sweetheart. He clutched onto me tighter and sobs poured out of him, into my neck and hair as I covered his face with small, tender kisses, reassuring him over and over again that it was over, that she wasnt coming back. You can be Katies Daddy now, Edward., I said, clearly and firmly. We killed her., he breathed. Alright. Lets deal with this right now. Dr. Bella is in. Yes., I pulled back, looking into his deep green eyes, holding his face as I gave it to him straight, We killed her. It had to be done. For usfor Katie. And I dont feel bad about it. I wont feel guilty, either. And neither will YOU. Do you hear me? We exterminated a dangerous insect today. One that wouldve wiped out your whole world simply because you walked away from her. Shes owned you for too long, Edward. DONTlet her own you anymore. It was the right thing to do. It was the right thing to do. Believe me. Pleasebelieve me. While I spoke, Edwards eyes strengthenedand I could see it with my naked eyes. The fear was goingand at last, it was gone. All of it. I love you, Bella., he laid his forehead on mine, closing his eyes, You heal me. You are my medicine. I love you, too, Edward., I kissed his forehead, pulling his good arm, Now come on, time to heal the rest of you. Rule one, when youre shot you have to go to the hospital. He followed me as I led him to the first ambulance we found. Without a shirt on, right?, he gave me his crooked smile. Edward would be alright. I knew it right then. The psychiatric world might disagree but this I knew: Killing Victoria was good. It would not make me restless in the night. I would shed no tears over her or what Ive done. I will not be afraid to fall asleep. She will not be in my dreamsor

nightmares. She would not steal a drop of joy from my life from here on out. I wouldnt let her. Some groups might call her a human being, a person, someone who had a right to live. Not me. All the pain shed inflictednot only upon Edward Cullen but countless others. JasonEmmettwho knows how many others there had been? All those spirits would be at rest nowat peaceable to move onto a warm, sunny place now. All the pain she could have inflictedhad yet to inflictwas unreal to consider. I believed her final words to Edward. I know she wouldve murdered Katie right before her fathers eyes. She wouldve forever destroyed Edward Cullen at that moment. Even if he lived through such a thing, hed be dead inside. He no doubt would find no reason to go on living then. He would kill himself. Those images, avoided futures that I couldnt bear to linger onthey would keep me from feeling a drop of pity for Victoriathey would keep me from ruining my life with useless guilt. Everyday courts convict people just like her and give the death penalty, being merciful and giving a lethal injection, a quiet, painless death. Today I was judge, jury, and executioner. And Victoria did not deserve a painless death. Maybe if I or someone else had met Victoria long ago, maybe she couldve been saved. But I can never think of it that way. I wont. What ifs and maybes didnt count now. Im sure Charlie would understand what I chose today. How many times did he see murderers and rapists walk away from court, free, ready to do it all over again to another innocent life? My conscious is clear. Edward will never have to look over his shoulder again, afraid. If this is the only gift I can give him, Im ecstatic about it. The one I love is closer than I think. I pray to God that Edward is closer to my heartnot further away now. HELP!, I waved at the paramedics as I helped Edward to the ambulance, and three men in white came running over to us, helping Edward up into the back as I followed him right inside. We were flying in seconds as the men tended Edwards wound, tearing the shirt off his body as they laid him down flat on the gurney. Bella!, he reached for me, grabbing my hand and squeezing it, relieved I was still there, and he breathed easier, Bellapleasedont leave me. I dont think he was talking about me leaving him in the ambulance. Its more than that. Im here, Edward., I gazed at him and he never looked more beautiful to methe look in those eyeshe is free. At last. Freed Eagle. Im not going anywhere., I assured, Nothing could take me from you.

He smiled at me and I kissed his hand, both of my hands wrapped around his. I kept worrying about Charlie and wished wed get there already. When we did arrive there, Edward was temporarily patched up to stop the bleeding and I hopped out of the back of the ambulance, waiting as they pulled Edward out by the gurney, wheeling him into the ER. I ran inside after them and Edward was trying to reach for me again as they took him down the hall. The paramedic told me I couldnt come into the ER and to wait out in the waiting room. Bella!, Edward tried to call out from under his oxygen mask. I wanted to die right then, hating it but understanding that they had to hurry and couldnt give me time for a nice romantic talk first. Tears ran down my face as I numbly walked towards the waiting roomand there I was almost jumped on by Emmett and Jasper, Alice and Rosalie. Bella, Emmett said over everyone elses voices as they all spoke at once, Your father 34 BPOV What ABOUT my father?!, I felt a huge lump in my chest and my throat was clogging as Emmett stood there with his soft, sad brown eyes. I dont know everything., Emmett said, glancing at the receptionist desk, I told them I was Charlies son so theyd get him right into surgery. I heard one of them say internal bleeding I shoved by him and went to the front desk, cutting off another woman who was trying to get information about her husband. EXCUSE ME!, I almost yelled, My father, Charlie Swan, was brought in. I want to know how he is. Hes in surgery, I think. I want to know how Edward is, too, but he just went in there and was all alone, too. I pictured a few people in white all around my Edward, shoving tubes into his throat, sticking needles into him, ignoring his shouts and questions while they worked on him. Hes had that enough in his lifetime. I hate that now, after everything tonight, he has to go through it again, by himself. Internal bleeding. Thats not good. I kept seeing him land on his backon that tableso hardI think now I heard a horrible cracking sound. Was that the tableor my fathers spine? Was I just imagining that sound now? Just one minute, please, Miss., the older woman with huge glasses put a finger up at me. I huffed and spun my head towards Emmett and Jasper, who were standing at my right side. Alice and Rosalie were at my left, trying to comfort me. Alice was rubbing my back. How was he in the ambulance?, I asked Emmett.

He was talking, Emmett began, He seemed alright. He was even joking, saying you were probably making out with Edward somewhere. And then he justconked out and all Hell broke loose. I spun back to the lady at the desk and she looked at me now, the other woman beside me gone. Whats the name?, she asked, fumbling with some yellow cards in front of her. Charlie SWAN., I stated loudly and clearly, S W A N. Hes in surgery., the woman said. Duh. I know THAT., I frowned, How is he? Whats wrong with him? Is he gonna be alright? I have no idea, Miss., she shrugged, I cant interrupt any surgeries. Youll have to wait until theyre through. Have a seat and as soon as I hear anything, Ill call you. Yea, right., I grumbled, turning slowly away from the desk and stumbling towards the seats in the waiting room, Alice holding my hand and Rosalie staring back at me with worry in her eyes. Hows Edward?, Emmett asked as we all took a seat. I was shaking, hating it. The two men I loved more than anything were each in hospital emergency rooms, fighting for their lives, without me. And all I could do was sit here and wait for word from Mrs. Stupid at the desk. I think hes alright., my voice trembled, But I dont know. They took him into the ER and wouldnt let me come. Hell be okay, Bella., Jasper put a hand on my shoulder, Theyll both be okay. I let out a deep breath that Id been holding and Alice asked if I wanted some water or something. I think I nodded. Jasper?, I looked at him, whispering. Yea?, he looked back. Victorias dead., I breathed, very low, I dropped the candle on the bar. I think shes dead. I looked back and the whole bar was on fire. Jasper looked strange. He looked glad, relieved, and satisfiedbut also concerned and worried. Emmett leaned forward, looking at Jasper. Go check it out, Jazz., Emmett gave him permission to go, Well stay here with Bella. Come back and let us know what happened. Yea., he stood up, about to rush out but then he came back, looking down at me. Thank you, Bella., he simply said, then made another cringe at the way it sounded, Im sorry. You know what I mean. I know., I tried to grin at him, Go on.

A few minutes later, all my questions were popping into my head. And poor Emmett. I was asking him everything. Some things he could answer, others he couldnt. When did Jasper find that cloth?, I asked, And why didnt he say anything? We couldve skipped this whole night! Jasper has been pretending to be a dancer for a long time., Emmett began, I knew it a couple weeks ago but I never told Victoria anything. I used to think Victoria was okayuntil I saw what she did to Edward. He was a cool guy, you know. That night I helped him, and brought him into the clubI liked him right off. He was honestlooked everyone right in the eyeshe was strong. He had an opinion. He smiled a lot. He would argue if he didnt agree with you. Once Victoria got him, I saw that change a little more every day. Its like she was sucking the soul out of him. Soon, Edward never looked me in the eye again. He always looks down. He cant hold anyones eyes for long. And he never argues. He never relaxes. Hes always afraid. He never laughs. Not for real. Well, until you came along, anyway. Emmett frowned, and continued. Anyway, he sighed, I told Jasper to watch out for Edward. He was in trouble, I told Jazz. I didnt know anything about him being there to avenge his brother. I thought he was an undercover cop or something. He didnt tell me much. I guess he didnt trust me yet. The other night, Charlie saw him hanging out, watching the club. He and I were keeping an eye on the place, making sure Edward was okay. We always do that, when Edward is in the dungeon. Its been a long time since hes been in there, being punished. Hes usually very well behaved for Victoria. Charlie and Jasper soon figured out that they were on the same side. Charlie showed Jazz the sketch of his brother and Jasperbroke down a little. Charlie told him what happened to his brother. Until that moment, Jazz was hoping maybe his brother was still alive somewhere, maybe living like Edward was. But then he knew. And he kindawent a little nuts. He wanted revenge. He didnt want to turn Victoria into the cops. He went along with Charlie, acting like he was in on the plan. But reallyhe wanted her dead. Jasper told me what was going on., Emmett looked at his hands, And we watched the dungeon like hawks. The one night, Victoria asked me to bring exercise equipment into the dungeon for Edward the next day. I had Jasper help me. Edward was asleep, looking alright. He had a big goofy smile on his face. He looked like he was peaceful so I didnt wake him. Then Jasper unzipped the back of Vics leather table and took out this cloth. It was all dry but red with blood on it. Jasper told me what it was and I told him we should bring it to Charlie. But he said no. He wanted Victoria dead and if the police got the cloth, hed be the first suspect. He said it was his brothers blood and it belonged to him now. The police would only mess things up, Jazz said. He told me about this dinner Victoria was planning. He said it would be the perfect time to let her have it. Police could blame it on Sir Kevin, or James, or RavenHe said this way, he could take out a whole bunch of them. Get justice for his little brother. When he told me what they did to his brother, I kinda agreed. We swore wed keep you and Edward safe. We wouldve been with you all the time, but then we found Alice and Rosalie in Victorias office. Emmett gave me a look then.

Sorry., I frowned, You know, if you guys trusted us and told us what you were planning, we couldve all got together and formed a better plan. Jasper wasnt thinking straight, Bella. I got so scared when Victoria poured her drink into Edwards mouth., Emmett changed the subject, I thought maybe Jazz poisoned her drink with something lethal. I ran back in there and almost screamed at him, asking him if he did that. He was smart enough not to try that, though, he knows Victoria feeds Edward things at these dinners. Even though he was nuts to get revengehe tried to make sure you guys wouldnt get hurt. Revenge is a bitch., I agreed, wondering if I killed Victoria for revengeor to stop her from hurting Edward anymore. It didnt matter. All that matters now is Edward and Charlie. If they came out of this alright, I wouldnt care about all the rest. Bella? Emmett touched my arm. Yea? I rubbed my wet eyes, knowing it would probably be hours before I had some news on either of my men. Your Dad saved my life, Bella. I was cuffed but still fighting back pretty good. I head butted one of the guys and had the other ones neck between my legs, ready to snap his neck. Then the one I head butted sat up and aimed his gun at the back of my head. Thats when Charlie attacked. Hes really cool. Im glad hes using the present tense. Yea, he is., I felt tears in my eyes. My Dad is always the unsung hero, never wanting credit for what he does, never enjoying the spotlight, always applauding for everyone else except himself, always holding up another on his shoulders. I had given him such a hard time during all this. I wanted instant justice, like Jasper did. I wanted fast results and I wasnt quiet about it when I screamed at my Dad. Maybe if I hadnt rushed him like I didmaybe this couldve gone smoother. Maybe he wouldnt be in surgery now. And neither would Edward. Dad, GodIm so sorry. I told you that a paid escort gave me more love and affection in two weeks than you did in my entire lifetime. That was so fucked up of me. And not true. I stuck a knife in your heart because I was so afraid. I almost thought that you wanted Edward to die, so he wouldnt be around me anymore. Youve been there for me my whole life, Dadin everything I ever did. And at the first sign of trouble, I turned my back on youand worseI lashed out at you. I love you, Daddy. Please God, give me the chance to say that to him again. Let me get a chance to say Im sorry and see his dry smile as he forgives me once again for my stupid mistakes. You saved us all. You saved Edward. You saved me.

When I closed my eyes, tears fell out of them and my head dropped into my trembling hands. Then Emmett hugged me to him, whispering, Hes gonna be okay. Hes a tough old guy. He heard about your sex games with Edward from the bug and survived. Although I thought we were losing him at that point. I thought he was going to team up with James and Vic and run down to the dungeon to finish you both off. Shut up., I didnt want to smile or laugh but I nearly did. Thanksgivings and Christmas is gonna be an especially fun time for all you guys., Emmett smirked. Stop., I tried to hide a grin, picturing Charlie and Edward exchanging Christmas gifts by the tree. Emmett hugged me tighter, and I let him. I never had a big brother before. It felt like I had one now. I needed one now. So I hugged him back. This has been Edwards one true friend through some horrible fucked up years. He made sure Edward was fed and warm on nights when no one else cared or bothered, even Edward himself. He was the shoulder Edward leaned on, his protector, his teacher, the rock he clung to. He is family.

BPOV Im not sure how much time had passed when a doctor finally came out and called, Edward Cullens family? I was already on my feet, along with Emmett and the girls behind me. Yes!, I held myself together, holding my stomach as the 35-ish man with tussled black hair and fair skin stood there, in his blue scrubs. Youre all related to him?, he raised a brow, not stupid by any means. Im his brother., Emmett said blankly, stating it as truth. It was the truth. The doctor gave a nod and began. Edward is very lucky., he said as my stomach unclenched, It was a little tough for awhile, we couldnt make the bleeding stop. But then we got a miracle. We sealed up the nicked artery. Edward will be fine. But he lost a lot of blood. Were trying to locate some His blood type is the same as mine, O., Emmett said straight away, Ill give him some right now. Oh, okay, great!, the doctor looked pleased and surprised that Emmett would just know this and also have the same blood type. I love you, Emmettso much. Come with me, then, and well get you set up., the doctor offered. Emmett turned to me and hugged me again, muttering to me, It comes up every time we have to get ourselves tested.

Thank you, Emmett., I squeezed him so tight, tears in my eyes again, Thank you. No thanks needed., Emmett smiled, I told you, were brothers. My blood is his blood. Ill be right back. Emmett was going and the doctor with him when I stopped them. Wait!, I shouted, feeling bad right away, since we were in a hospital, How is Edward now? Is he alright? Is he in any pain? Not at all., the doctor smiled at me assuring, I gave him something and hes asleep now. Hes fine. I promise. Later, when he wakes up, you can all say hello. Cant I just see him now?, I let a tear fall, not caring, Just for a second? I wont wake him up, I just need to. Bella, hes okay., Emmett ran a hand down my arm, Let him sleep a little. Hes had a rough week. Youre Bella?, the doctor grinned at me. Yea, why?, I frowned. He smiled a little more. I was given lots of messages for you while I was trying to work on him. I dont remember them all, but let me see. There was I love you, Bella, Ill always love you. Then there was tell Katie I love her, too. Tell her Ive always loved her. Tell her Im sorry I wasnt there for so long. I kept telling Edward he wasnt going to die, but he still kept giving me messages. Thats when I decided to put him to sleep. Down to the last second, he was talking. The last thing he said was weird. He said, Tell them I died freeand happy. Thats our Edward., Emmett smirked, Always the optimist. Mr. Overthinker. Luck isnt usually on his side., my weepy voice said to both Emmett and the doctor. It was today., both Emmett and the doctor said at the same time and laughed at each other. I even had to smile. He would be alright. If I could right now, Id fly up to space and back again, howling and laughing all the way. I was crying and smiling at the same time when the doctor glanced behind him and said, Come on, Bella. You can have a minute. Just dont tell anyone on me. Oh God!, I sobbed gratefully, Thank you! Shhhh, he grinned, taking my hand and shrugging his head at Emmett to follow us. Before getting to Edwards room, the doctor handed Emmett off to a nurse, telling her to how much CCs of blood to get from him. I wasnt listening much. I was almost jumping up and down waiting to see Edward. Thanks, Doc., Emmett went down another hallway, his eyebrows dancing suggestively at us with the pretty red-haired nurse while the doctor took me to the left. Room 43. He opened the door slowly and whispered, Be very quiet, okay? Theres another patient asleep inside.

Okay., I agreed in a whisper, adding, Thanks again. He nodded and walked off as I went inside. The walls were a nice soft yellow and the lights were dim. It was still dark outside I noticed and guessed it was in the wee hours of the morning, no sunrise yet. A curtain was pulled so I couldnt see the patient next to Edward but I didnt need to see anyone else. I couldnt pull my eyes away from the deep reddish brown hair that refused to behaveand the even fairer white face of the sleeping, peaceful angel a few feet away. The yellow blanket looked soft and clean and was tucked under his arms. They were straight at his sides and his bed had his head raised slightly up. He looked so stiff and mannequin-like, like a ken doll, nothing like the curled up god he usually was while he slept. As I moved closer, I saw they had an IV injected into the top of his hand, a white piece of tape over the spot the needle entered. I felt my chin trembling as I wept, trying to keep it quiet, my hand covering my mouth tightly. His lips were in that cute little ducky pout I first saw when I woke up next to him that first morning after. His lips are so deep red. I couldnt really make myself say words right now. I moved my fingers, ghosting them, really, over his lips, moving softly over his eyebrowsthen his eyelidsthe backs of my fingers gliding down those deep cheekbones, both sidesI gently kissed those sweet little boy lips, unable to stay away. Then I kissed his hand where the IV was poking into him, as if my kiss could cure that, too. Love is the best medicine for a broken heart. He was wearing a blue hospital gown with white trim and that just made his skin appear more transparent to me. He looked terribly pale. That scared me. But then he needs blood. Emmett is taking care of that now. Im sure they have more blood around here, too, somewhere. I could see thick bandages over where the gunshot was over the space between his shoulder and torso. Im sure there was more on the back of him, where the bullet entered. It was then that I realized the bullet had passed through him. Its a miracle it didnt hit me then. I didnt even think of that before, in all the chaos. My eyes widened as a thought began to creep in. Did it hit my Dad? He was right beside me. I had to get back out there in case they had news about my Dad, but how can I leave Edward alone now? A couple more minutes, I told myself. Sniffing, I wiped my red, swollen eyes and took a deep breath. Dont leave me, Bellahe had said to me in the ambulance. I dont want to leave you. Ever. I would be in this bed now, if it werent for you, I mentally told him as I touched his hair, moving it upwards with my careful fingers. I like it wild, up and

disobedient. Just as he had been tonight when he saved my life. Just as he was when he fought for his freedom. You are the best partner ever., I whispered, feeling another tear fall, staring at his still eyeshypnotized by the very tiny but long black eyelashes. I had felt badly about my joke earlier, saying I wanted Jasper for my partner. I never want to say anything that hurts him, even in the slightest, ever again. Hed had enough hurt for one lifetime. Only you, Edward, knowing all the greatest pains in the world, would have the heart and the guts to throw yourself into a bullet to keep it from me. You are my protector now. You are my man. Forever. I could never feel anything but complete love and pride for you. You have never been a slave in my eyes, Edward. You could never look weak or helpless to meeven when youre chained up naked right against me. I love you so much, Edward., I whispered right into his ear, bending over and cradling his face in my gentle hands, kissing his nose and then his lips very, very carefully, Loves too small a word for what I feel for you. My little ducky lips., I smiled down at that mouthso adorable, Before you know it, youll be back in my bed, cuddling with me. I cant fall asleep unless you hold me now. You spoiled me rotten. I gathered up the blanket and eased his hands underneath it, laying them over his waist, bringing the golden cotton up around his neck, under his chin, the way he liked it. There you go, baby., I breathed, smoothing the blanket over his chest, not going near where the bandages were, Sleep now. Dream sweet dreams. Ill sneak a cherry icee in tomorrow. I think youve earned it. The patient next to Edward on the other side of the curtain coughed then. My head spun at the sound of it. Coughing. Smoke inhalation? It better not be. Not in the same room. God isnt that twisted, is she? I was at the curtain in two steps and I pausedshivering. Then I tore it open in one hard yank. Would it be James? Sir Kevin? What would I do if it was? A little old man jumped as I stood there, staring at him, the curtain in my fist. He coughed again, a couple thick blankets over his little body. Sorry., I offered as he covered his mouth, Are you okay? God, I am paranoid. But then, I have reason to be. He nodded and I saw there was a pitcher of water and a few plastic cups at his bedside. I poured him a glass and handed it to him. He might have thought I was a nurse in this dim light and he slowly sipped his cup as I slowly moved the curtain back into place. Just making sure youre safe., I said to Edward as I came back quickly, Were partners, remember?

I cautiously let a tiny sliver of my butt sit on the edge of the bed, not wanting to do anything to hurt him or disturb him now. I ran my fingers over his and tried not to cry right now. I didnt want him to hear me sad, not after all wed done to get to this moment. I slipped his friendship ring off my finger and held his finger, sliding it onto his pinky, the only finger small enough to fit inside it. Will you marry me, Edward Cullen?, I whispered, almost to myself, smiling and letting tears fall. His lips just curled up more, looking slightly stubborn now, like he was pouting. His breathing was so deep and calm nowit soothed me. I know, youre the man, its your job to ask me, huh?, I teased. I took a breath and said, We have a lot to do. A lot to learn. A lot to sayI know. I want this to be good. I want this to be happy. I want thisforever. Its going to take a lot of work. But Ill do the work. Ill do anything. For you. You are my life now. My life always. I hope he still feels the same way about me now. I hope he doesnt think he just left one murderess for another. I hope he still thinks Im different than the other women hes known. I want to be. The doctor peeked inside a moment later and I stood up, not wanting to abuse the gift hed given me. Coming., I said to the doctor and he waited a second as I bent over my sleeping prince one more time. Ill be back soon, Thumper., I smiled, kissing the little dent in his chin and pulling myself away before Id never let myself go, adding, Be good. It took all the strength I had to walk away from him but I managed to do itonly so I could go back to the waiting room and wait some more to hear more about my father. The doctor who cared for Edward said hed try to find out what was going on with Charlie but that was hours ago. Rosalie and Alice were watching The View on TV while I stared at my shoes, still wearing Ravens stolen dress. I wish I had some nice comfy sweats and a tshirtsome warm cotton socks. Emmetts cell rang and he stopped eating his snickers bar, flipping it open. Jazz!, Emmett almost yelled, frowning, Where the hell have you been? A series of yeas and uh-huhs came out of Emmett and then he sighed and said, I know. Then Emmett told Jasper that Edward was fine and was getting his blood transfusions now and that we still hadnt heard about Charlie yet. Yea, shes here., Emmett said, Hold on. He handed the phone to me and Alice looked a little hurt that he asked for me over her first. But she was watching me and listening intently. Jasper?, I answered.

Hi Bella., he said, Im at the police station. I wouldve called before, but I had lots to tell these guys, you know. I know., I said, feeling afraid that the police would know that I killed Victoria. So, when are they coming to arrest me?, I asked, half kidding, half not. Why would they arrest you?, Jasper asked, Sir Kevin is the one who killed Victoria. I squinted and asked, What? The lack of sleep and the worrying was making me a little dumb at the moment. Sir Kevin and Victoria were fighting over Edward., Jasper informed, as if it were fact and he was remembering it, A candle fell over and they both went up in flames. Sir Kevin didnt make it, either. His head lit up right away, since he was covered in alcohol. I let out a breath and whispered, Thank you, Jasper. I imagined Edward waking up and finding out I was in jail for murder. My father didnt have that kind of money for a brilliant lawyer and Id never want to put him or Edward through some year long trial. Edward would need to get to his daughter as soon as possible. I wouldnt want him sitting in the first row behind me all that time while I sat there at the defense table in my orange uniform. I knew he would, but I would hate every single day of it. That would kill both of us. Not to mention, Edward on the stand, lying, trying to save me as he told countless tales of the things Sir Kevin and Victoria performed on him. Then the inhuman stripping Edward would endure as the states attorney got up and tore him to shreds, calling him a willing whore and Victorias submissive boyfriend. Theyd make him look like a sleazy villain, not a victim. I didnt like seeing him as either of those, but thats what hed seem to be, as each side presented their cases. The news would be all over it. Ben and Angela would hear all about it. Katie would, too. Edward would be on the news and on the front pages of all the papers, microphones shoved in his face as he tried to leave the courtroom everyday, saying No comment. Katies classmates would probably tease her everyday about it. It would have ruined all of us. It wouldve destroyed our love. It would have destroyed ME. And in the end, Id be convicted anyway. Because I did do it. And I would never be sorry for it. I couldnt see myself sitting there, enduring all of that, and not leaping to my feet and confessing it all, proudly. James and Raven have been arrested., Jasper said next, I told them all about James. They listened to the stuff Charlie recorded in the dungeon. Victoria wrecked the bug when she took it off you, so they just heard everything up to then. They heard James plans for you, Bella. They heard Victoria saying that shed keep Edward, using you to keep him quiet. They know she shot Edward and your father. Theyll be coming to the hospital later today to get statements from all you guys. I gave them the cloth and told them about my brother. Theyre

talking to James now, trying to find out where the body is. And how many more bodies there are. Hes not talking yetbut I think he will. Alright, I told myself simply. Victoria DID die. And so did Sir Kevin. I still didnt know much about that man but I saw that he scared the shit out of Edward. Im sure he hurt Edward, too, in some way. I hoped I was wrong about my suspicionsbut I dont think I was. Sir Kevin liked Edward, he had told me last night. Sir Kevinhadbeen withEdward. Im sure he was forced, unless Katie or I were threatened again. He told me he was Edwards new master. And it did look like he was caring for Edwards wounds after he was shot. It must have been recently that Sir Kevin entered Edwards life. Edward had told me in our sessions that hed never had a man before. And then I wanted to tear my heart out. I let him go back there. I just let him walk away, going to a place where he was raped by a man. That was his punishment for caring for me in front of Victoria. That was his punishment for me attacking her that night. I knew without being toldthats why the bug was lost so soon. Edward wanted Charlie and I spared that, even if he wouldnt be spared it. He couldve said his word and ended the whole thing right then. But he wanted to be a member of the team, he wanted to get real proof against Victoria so shed never bother us again. He gave himself up so we could have a future. He sacrificed his body once morefor usfor his daughter. And he says he isnt strong. I want to go hug him some more now. Raven will most likely be released with bail., Jasper said, snapping me out of my thoughts, She didnt really do much of anything. She offered you a contract as a sub with her, thats not illegal. And you said yes. I dont think shell be any danger, even free. Her father is a big deal, owns a corporation. He has to come bail her out with his lawyer. No doubt hell ship her off to Puerto Rico so she wont embarrass him or cost him any business with this scandal. I swallowed and thought of her for a second. She might not seem dangerous to Jasper but Ive seen her work on Edwards body. She is demented and has a major crush on Edward. But I dont really see her doing anything like coming after Edward or something. She might just move away and start over, finding some other poor bastard to be her slave. One thing is for sure. There are broken hearted people in every country, every city. I wondered how many Edwards there were out there, waiting to begin their Hell, as Edward was just finishing his time there. I want to save everyone. I want to heal all the broken hearts out there, before they become victims or slavesor corpses. I want to be a doctor now more than ever. I have to be a psychiatrist. But did I have to stay here to do it? Could I? I had built a whole life hereI had loved it here. I adored New York. It had everything! Forks had nothing new, ever. New York could be different every day, it was always changing and surprising me. I saw myself living here forever, just three weeks ago. Now, I kept seeing myself in sunny Florida, covered with sunburn, but happily holding Katies hand as Edward held the other, and we were walking along the crowded beach, searching for a spot to claim with our umbrella. Would Katie like me? Would she push me away? Was it right for me to be there? Katie had waited for her Daddy for so longand now shed have himbut I would

probably take the joy out of that, horning in where I wasnt wanted. Daddys new girlfriend. Shed probably think that Im the one who took him away from her all those years. And we couldnt tell her the truth as to where hed been. They deserved time alone together. Ben and Angela would always be there, but Katie needed Edward all to herself, to discover him again, to see that he still loved her and always would, and that none of this was her fault. Would she get to experience all that if Edward was always upset, telling her to give me a chance? I did not want to be the third wheel, trying to analyze every thing Katie said or did. I could not be Dr. Bella for Katie. And I didnt want to be. I dont want to be a new Mommy for Katie. No one could ever take her place. She still hadnt dealt with losing her mother yet, from what Edward told me. He had to deal with it, too, and hadnt yet. I want to be Katies friend. If I had any chance of being thatI couldnt show up on her doorstep holding Edwards hand the day he came back to her. That much I knew. Bella?, Jasper asked, hearing only my pained breathing on the line. Im here. Sorry., I snapped out of it, pushing away the image of Edwards face as I told him I couldnt go with him. You said you wouldnt leave me. Ever. I could hear him saying the words, hurt thick in his voice. Everything will be alright, Bella., Jasper said with confidence, I want to thank you, too, for how brave you were last night. My brother thanks you, too. I probably wont be seeing you guys for awhile. Theyre putting me and my parents in witness protection. Im trying to decide now if I want my hair black or red. I had to chuckle at that, although I hated the idea of Jasper being placed in witness protection. But it made sense. Victorias family would probably want some kind of revengeor to get rid of the witnesses so James couldnt be convicted of anything. I wondered if theyd try to get Edward and I, Charlie, and even Emmett, Alice and Rosalie to join it too. Did we have to do it? Did we have a choice? How would Edward be with his daughter then? Wait!, I almost leapt to my feet, What about Edwards daughter? Is she safe? Alice found Edwards kids address in the computer. She wiped out a lot of Edwards information, but who knows if James or his family know where Katie is. They have Florida police watching out for them now. Theyll definitely be offered the witness protection deal, along with Edward. Well, there goes the dreams about Florida. Theyd probably move Edward and his family to the other side of the world, in some nothing little town like Forks. So, if I didnt join the program with them, theyd be gone, hidden in plain sight, to a place Id never be allowed to know. I wouldnt even be able to join them later on, after Katie had some time with her Dad. Id never be allowed to know where they went or how to reach themever. Id lose him. So much for a happily ever after.

I felt my knees shaking as I tried to think of something profound to say as he was telling me goodbyebut thats when a doctor finally came out and called, Charlie Swan? I had to rush a Gotta go, Jazz, my father! Talk to Emmett! I leapt up before thinking about it and tossed Emmett his phone. Sorry, Jasper. You deserved a nicer goodbye than that. Im his daughter, Bella., I almost ran into the older doctor who was balding with a salt and pepper beard, Alice and Rosalie beside me. Your father just came out of surgery., the doctor informed, a glum look on his face, He had multiple, multiple injuries, Im afraid. We took care of the gunshot in his leg and abdomen. It was a miracle his back wasnt broken, considering the fall he took. But his leg, the leg that was also shot, was completely shatteredeverywhere. And then, trying to retrieve the bullet out of therewas impossible. Miss Swanwe had to amputate your fathers leg. It was either that or hed have bled out. It wasnt salvageable. Im sorry. He must have landed on that leg when he fell. My head was spinning. Charlie lost his leg. They already cut it off!! Hed be in a wheelchair!! Hed need a prosthetic leg! He could never be a cop now! He would lose his job! Being a cop is everything to Charlie! No. Wait!, I felt so angry at the doctor suddenly, rational thought gone, Youchopped off his leg?! We had no choice, Miss., the doctor repeated, We wouldve lost him. We worked all through the night, hoping we wouldnt have to do it. But five of us, finally had to agree. There really was no other way. But hes a COP!, I shook all over, A police CHIEF! What is he supposed to do now?! The doctor looked uncomfortable as Emmett was behind me now, rubbing my arms supportively, trying to calm me down. Im very sorry., the doctor said, looking down, turning and walking back down the hallway. Yea, fine, just WALK AWAY!, I yelled louder, getting the attention of all the people in the waiting room, Cant fix it, then just CHOP IT OFF!! Fucking incompetent--- Bella., Emmett turned me away from the hallway, Come on, lets look on the side of your father is alive. You dont KNOW Charlie!, I cried, This will kill him! Come onsit down., Emmett sat me down gently as the girls stared down at me, looking sad for me. Listen, Bella., Emmett began, Your father is a cop. Hes known all his life, that saving otherscould mean hed get hurt in the line of duty. Every cop knows that. They accept it. Losing a leg wont make Charlie less than what he is. I promise. This is my fault, Emmett!, I grabbed at my hair, I made him come here, I made him help us! Hed be safe at home in Forks right now if it werent for me!

Then Id be dead now., Emmett informed, clearing things up for me, staring right into my eyes, Edwardwould be dead now. Remember who shot Victorias leg, just as she was about to shoot Edward in the head? I just cried, hating it that I couldnt regret asking my father to come here to help us. He had played major parts in this whole thing. Maybe he wasnt some Rambo type, but if it werent for him, its true. Emmett would definitely be dead. Edward would 90 per cent probably be dead, too. Who knows what else couldve happened if Charlie hadnt been part of it all? Its okay., Emmett kissed the top of my head as I hung it in my hands, Go ahead and cry. It is fucked up. Emmett soon took me outside, to sit in the nice morning breeze while I bawled. It did feel much nicer than being in that awful waiting room, everyone staring at me, whispering about me. I began to see just how nice it was to be comforted and cared for by Emmett and for a second, I wondered if Emmett thought I was a big a pain in the ass as Edward probably had been for him the last few years. I knew he didnt mind but I also promised myself Id find a way to repay him for all hed done, not just for mebut for Edward. He is this big, scary looking guy at first. But then, when he touches you, hes a giant teddy bear. I was so grateful for Emmett today. Or maybe he was trying to thank Charlie for saving his life by taking care of me. Either way, it was very sweet. But I hated it that I would rather have Edward here, holding me, kissing mewhispering supportive things into my ear. I also knew he would be very upset hearing about my Dad, and would probably do just what I didblame himself. At that point, Id have to bring Emmett in to give him the same speech I got. I liked it best when he didnt say anything. He didnt fill up the void by talking and giving me all kinds of cute little platitudes. He just let me cry. I pictured Edwardnaked and crying while Emmett just sat there at his side, letting him do it, not letting him do it alone. Finally, at about noontime, I found myself brave enough to come back to the waiting room. I told my friends to go home and get some sleep. They were still in their little dresses, in their bare stocking feet because theyd kicked off their high heeled shoes hours ago. They went, only when I said I needed a comfortable pair of jeans and a t-shirt, socks and sneakers. They promised to be back in about an hour. Emmett stayed with me, getting me to venture downstairs into the cafeteria. It was only then that I thought maybe I should call his parentsor maybe Joseph and Katherine. But did Edward want them to know? What if the police said something to them about what happened? No, Emmett and I decided. Edward could decide if he wanted someone else to come here and visit him. I thought of calling my mother about Charlie but I decided against that, too. She was on the road with Phil, a minor league baseball player. I didnt want to call her and ask her to leave to come here and stare at Charlie, her ex husband, who barely could talk to her anymore, let alone want her seeing him with no leg. Shed be sure to ask what happened. And I didnt want to explain it to her, either. Not now.

Emmett made me take a little walk with him around the hospital, now that we had the news on both Edward and Charlie. He wanted me to take a little time away from sitting in that waiting room. We walked by the maternity ward and almost wanted to stop and run the other way. But Emmett was so excited to be there and see the babies. That surprised me. But after hed been so great to me, I didnt protest. We were looking through the glass at the little clear boxes they called cribs inside. Babies names adorned each crib and every little bundle had a pink cap or blue on snugly wrapped around their tiny, soft heads. We pointed out the cute ones to each other. Then we pointed out the strange looking ones to each other. I found myself laughing at this one, Jennifer. She wouldnt stop crying. She looked cranky and her little bottom lip kept curling out, pouting. This reminded me of Edwards lips. I love babies., Emmett confessed, then glanced at me, slightly embarrassed. But I was smiling back at him, so he let that go. I could see Emmett being great with babies. Hed make a sweet father. They havent made one mistake yet., he tilted his head as he looked at one, They could be anythingDO anything. Dr. Bella was back, knowing why Emmett liked the thought of a blank slate. Im sure his life with Victoria was no picnic, either. And I wondered how many times shed hurt him, too. I was so focused on Edwards pain, I didnt think of all the rest of theirs. Im sure she shared her sickness with every man who worked for her. Youre free now, too, Emmett., I crossed my arms, looking at him with a small smile, What are you gonna do now? Well, Emmett smiled wide, the realization dawning on him that he had a clean slate now, too, and could do anythinggo anywhere. First I want to tell the cops everything I know., Emmett began, I want James to rot in his cell and I want to see him in there, even if its for a minute. Itll be great to see him on the inside for once. Alright, after your duty is done, then what?, I dug a little more. Hmmm he grinned, looking at the babies again, I never even thought about it. Weird. I know I want to work outside I dont care what weather it is, I want to be outside. Maybe work with animals. I like farms. Farms?, I smiled more as we both chuckled together. I understood him right off. After being cooped up in these dark, smoky places it made sense hed want to be out in the open air, bundled up in the rain and snow, not minding the cold after all hed endured. And it was nice that he wanted to care for animals. No doubt people looked less attractive to him now after all hed seen them do than innocent animals, who never meant to hurt anyone. And liking farmsEmmett wanted to grow things, where once there was nothing. He wanted to see thins bloom and open up instead of watching people like Edward shrink inside and close themselves off. He wanted to dig in the soil, feeling clean inside at the end of the day, instead of feeling dirty all the time, inside and out. He wanted the total opposite of what he had before.

Ive never been on a farm, Emmett shrugged, But I think Id like it. I dont know. He was so adorable and shy all of a sudden. I didnt feel bad at all, here, watching the babies, like I thought I would. This was nice. I really like Emmett. Im glad Edward had this great brother watching out for him while he lived at Fire. It just proves, even in our private hells, sometimes God sends us an angel to watch out for us. I think youd be a great farmer., I said, Youre big and strongand youd look wonderful in those denim overalls and straw hats. We were both laughing. And it was wonderful. I took his arm and leaned on it, rubbing his back now. And we watched the babies some more. I hoped Edward would be awake soon. The nurses promised to let us see him when he woke up. It shouldnt be much longer but I felt bad wishing hed get up so he could be sore and uncomfortable and troubled by the news of Charlie. A big part of me wanted him to keep resting, to enjoy his happy place in peace. Come on, Bella., Emmett put an arm around me and we were walking again, Ill tell you the story of how Edward earned the name Thumper. Emmett? Bella? Im glad youre not dead. Gee, thanks.

35 EPOV I was so scared when he finally looked up at me.., Bellas voice said, sounding very far away, He walked across the gym floor and I couldnt breathe. I almost passed out from lack of oxygen by the time he made it over to me. And he asked me to dance with him. Bella sighed and thats when I felt her fingers stroking mine. Slowlymy fingers began to feel like mine again. Fleshbonemuscleairwarmthsound.it was all coming back. Im aliveeven better than thatBella is touching metalking to mewith me. What is she talking about? Her first dance? Does she think jealousy will bring me out of it? Well, it is working, isnt it? Inside, I smiled, wanting to hear more. I wished I couldve been the first boy to ask her to dance. Even though that boy is probably still feeling the pain in his toes somewhere, cursing Bellas name. I wanted to be her everything. Then she gasped and I heard her more clearly, saying, Em!! Hes smiling!

Hes waking up?, Emmetts voice was loud and strong, making me feel even safer. Then a second later, I wished he werent right here with us. I wanted to be alone with my Bella. Edward?, she whispered, making her voice softer and more delicate, Babyits alright. Were all here. Youre alright. Can you try to open your eyes, sweetheart? Can I? If she wanted it, I would stop time. My eyes were heavy but I did manage to blink them open, and a blurry Bella face was hovering above me. I heard her laugh, in relief, and I could make out that she was smiling, her little white teeth coming into focus now. I couldnt help the slow smile that came back to life as her details sharpened. I could make out every hair in her head, her eyelashesthe light brown circle in her eyes that laid inside a darker brown edgeshe never looked more beautiful to me than right now. Hi baby, her voice nearly mewed this and I saw tears lining the bottoms of her eyes. Her hands were holding both of mine now, securely, lovingly, telling me that I was in good hands, that I was with people who loved me. Does my voice work? Let me see. With a small clear of my throat, I squinted and tried it. Hi., I so eloquently began. Bella laughed again and I heard Emmett give a warm chuckle, too. Then Bella was crying. No, none of that. Crying was in our past now. Laughterthats our new sound. I tried to think of something that would make her stop crying. Who are YOU?, I smiled, innocently and both Bella and Emmett gasped, their mouths hitting the floor. Then I laughed. I laughed as if it had been a thousand years since Id tried it. And I watched both of their faces as they realizedEmmett smiled. ButBella didnt. Thats NOT funny, Edward Thumper Cullen!, she almost went to slap my arm or something but halted herself, not wanting to assault me while I was still in my hospital bed. Oh, come on, Bella, I smiled a little less proudly, It was very funny. Edward has a sick sense of humor., Emmett agreed, I thought you knew about that already, Bella. No., she said, then thought about it, Wellmaybe. There was the one time I almost went to school in my robe! And he almost let me do it without telling me! I laughed again, thinking about that day and the look on her face Oh God, Emmett!, I giggled, It was a Care Bear bathrobe!

He started laughing with me as Bella frowned more, not enjoying us at the moment. I cant believe I actually prayed for you to wake up., Bella grumbled and almost got up off my bed. She was sitting there, beside me. Emmett grabbed her by the arms and sat her back down in place and stood himself up. Im gonna go check out some nurses., Emmett was backing out of the room, I was sure to let me have some alone time with Bella. See you later, ugly., Emmett pointed at me, with his usual smirk as I grinned back at him like an idiot, Bella, catch you in a few. He was gone and I knew I had some apologizing to do. I squeezed her little hands in mine and smiled more, unable to stop it, and said, Im sorry, Bella. You were crying. I hate that. I just wanted to make you laugh. She looked down at our hands and melted, smiling as I wanted her to now. Yea, I purred in approval, Thats how I love seeing your face. You have the most perfect smile. Wellyou and Katie Then, a sudden fear rose up inside of me. Victoria.KatieJames Bella!, I suddenly tensed and was grabbing her hard, her face staring back at me in shock, Katie! Where is she?! Is she alright?! Someone has to warn them to get out of the house! How long have I been out? You have to call Florida for me now! Edward, Edwardshhhhhshhhhh., Bella was stroking my face as I quieted a little, Theyre out of the house. The police in Florida have them all at a safe house now. Its a nice place, Ben told me. I called them on your cell. Theyre fine. Katie is fine. I felt all the air rush out of my chest thenI relaxed and let my clutching fingers loosen from around Bellas arms. And I felt tears in my eyes. Shhhh., she kept stroking my face with both her hands as I closed my eyes, slowly calming down, Nothing is going to happen to her, Edward, I promise. She is safe. Shes not even afraid. Ben even said they would take her to DisneyWorld today or tomorrow. Victoria said...if I ever left, theydtheyd get her, I hated how weak I sounded but even though Victoria was gone, her family wasnt. For years, threats of harm coming to Katie kept me at Victorias side. And it still scared the shit out of me. No., Bella put her forehead to mine, Those were lies, Edward. Lies to keep you her slave. She knew where your heart was. And she used that. No one is going after Katie. No one will hurt her. Youll be with her againvery soon. Dont be afraid, Edward. Dont be afraid. I didnt know how to do that. Would I ever feel safe? Wouldnt I, even if I was living with Katie, hate it every time she went out to play, every time she goes to a friends house, every time she goes to schoolId be afraid, staring out the doorway until she came back. And if she were ever late getting home? Christ! Id lose my mind.

Victorias gone. But the fear isnt. The threat isnt. The danger isnt. Her family will want revenge. James will want revenge. He could make a phone call from prison and men would be after us. It was then that I realized I couldnt go to Florida. We cant live there. We have to run. We have to live somewhere else. Somewhere no one could trace us. Mars didnt seem like it was far away enough for me at this point. Just rest now, okay?, Bellas voice asked gently, moving the blanket up around my neck, Everything will be alright. The only time I ever felt safe was when I was doing what Victoria wanted., I confessed, I knew then that she wouldnt hurt Katie. That life is over now, Edward., she stated firmly, looking me right in the eye, her hand holding my chin, Its just over. Dont look back right now. Well talk about it. But not until youre betterand out of here. I mean, youre going to have to look back there again and again so youll heal. We will talk about it, all the time. To not talk about it is to repress it and that then itll never go away. But today, I want you to relax. I let out a breath and already I felt stronger. Bella always gave me new faith and air so I could keep on going, when I thought it was impossible a moment ago. Then I thought to ask it. Hows Charlie?, I asked, still worrying. I had a feeling of total dread that shed tell me he died or something. I studied her face closely as she answered me. Sadness. Pain. Hes alright., she answered curtly, trying to smile a little, Hes going to be fine. Dont, Bella., I held her hand, Tell me. She stiffened and cleared her throat. She didnt cry, though. She held it back. Hehelost his leg., she said quickly, He landed on it when he fell. It was completely shattered, the doctor said. I felt like all the air had been sucked out of my body. I pictured Charlie without his leg and it physically hurt me inside. So much for resting today. And before you start, Edward, Bella looked at me, raw bravery in her eyes, This is no ones fault but Victorias. I was blaming myself, too, until Emmett pointed some things out to me. First, Charlie is and always will bea cop. He knows everyday that he risks his life for others. He wanted to help youand me. He knew there were dangers. He saved your life and Emmettsand mine, too. I know he wouldnt regret anything he did last night. So youre not allowed to, either. Guilt kills, Edward. Let Dr. Bella tell you, its a useless emotion that can cripple you. So were not even going to go there. Got it? I didnt answer for a moment but looked down at her hand holding mine, the IV needle and tape staring back at me. Got it, Cullen?, she jerked my face up so I was looking at her again. Got it., I said solemnly, wishing I were as tough as she was.

Maybe, in time, after lots of therapy, I could be like Bella. Or maybe not. But I would try my best to be worthy of this woman. And Katie. I almost wanted to have a session right then with Dr. Bella, but didnt think she was up for it right now. She looked tired and sadand I knew shed been through Hell in the last ten hours. She needed to rest more than I did. I moved myself over in my bed and opened the blanket to her. I needed to take care of her now, just as she had always taken care of me. She needed me now. Come here, Bambi., I whispered, peeking down at myself, hoping I wasnt still wearing my leather thong. I wasnt. I was naked beneath the hospital gown and I dont think it was tied in back, either. I didnt care. I always slept nude, anyway. I almost moved to take the gown off myself but didnt think it was right at the moment to snuggle up against her naked. I didnt want her to think this was a sexual thing. I wanted to comfort her. I wanted to hold her and kiss her until she fell asleep in my arms. I had waited for so long to hold her like this again. Three whole days. Its a lifetime without Bella. I actually got a little smile then. And she crawled up into the bed with me. She let out a ragged breath as she snuggled into me, my hand curling the nice soft blanket around her shoulder. My arms both brought her closer to me and I stroked her hair, laying her head down against my chest, making sure to avoid the bandages they had wrapped me in. Mmmmm I laid my chin on her head, half laying on the pillow, too. The smell of her hair was still a faint strawberry, I missed thisso much. I dont ever want to sleep without you again. I cant sleep without you., she answered, I havent really slept since you left. Awww, I felt a tiny pain deep inside and I held her tighter, kissing her hair, Well Im here now. Lets sleep. She sighed, content for now. I couldnt see her face but I was guessing she wasnt going to do this without a fight. One thing., I said, slipping my arm out of my hospital gown, I sleep naked, always. Got a problem with that? I carefully moved the gown off my hurt arm as Bella helped me and she giggled, tossing it over her shoulder. Absolutely not., she replied without a bit of hesitation. In fact, there was a little sexiness in her smirk. I thought maybe Bella would get naked, too, like she did in her apartment that first night, but she didnt. I was glad. I didnt mean for anything to happen here in the hospital bed, but I hated the stink of the hospital gown. And, even though I hated to admit it, I was used to sleeping in the nude. Maybe, someday, Id be used to nice pajamas. Stay down, Frankencock. Not now. And he listened to me! For once, he stayed down. Good boy! Close your eyes., I said quietly, my fingers stroking over her eyelids as she obeyed me.

I dont stink, do I?, I asked, hoping I didnt have that hospital odor. She laughed, giving me the best prize I couldve asked for. No, you smell great., she kissed my throat, Even in the hospital clothes, you smelled great. How do you do that? Pure magic., I chuckled, Now hush. Time to sleep. I smiled, feeling so alive and complete now that I was holding her again. This felt so right, so wonderful. I swore Id never let her go again. Even if she wanted to go, I would always be with her. In any way I could be. Even if that means stalking her wherever she decides to go. God, I need therapy. A moment or two had passed and I closed my eyes, just listening to her breathe. Her hot little exhaled air kept tickling my lower neck but that just made me feel more peacefulmore at ease. Bella is with me. In my arms. Its then that I finally realized it. I never have to dance in a cage again. I never have to deliver a pizza again. (At least not with the knowledge that Id be raped by my customer.) I never have to be tied up again, or gagged. Unless, of course, Bella wants to play with me. I wouldnt mind that. But then I doubted Bella would ever want to do that to me, her being as kind and sensitive as she is. I love you., she whispered, kissing my neck and snuggling her face into it. I loved the feel of her on my skin. Without a word, I decided I had to kiss her. I wanted those lips. I cupped under her chin with my finger and lifted her mouth to mine, placing a very soft, wet kiss there. I didnt make it too sexual. No tongues. This was a kiss that would say I love you. Then my voice decided to utter the words. I love you., I responded, as naturally as breathing. I never felt such a certainty about anything else, besides loving my daughter with all I haduntil now. I love Bella. I will always love Bella. She cuddled into me again and my heart began to thump harder in my chest. We fit together so perfectly, like we were born together, as one and split apart, only to wander the earth in search of each other, to be one again. Sleep now., I stroked her hair a little longer, hoping shed listen and try to get some peace at last. Her eyes did look very exhausted, although lovely. We laid like that for hours. The nurse didnt even try to come in and take her away from me and I was grateful. Maybe Lady Luck is finally liking me for once. Maybe shes ready to give me a chance and dance with me. Slow dance, please. I never want to grind my hips again. I dont dance that way anymore. I tried to sleep as Bella was but every now and then questions would pop up into my head. What am I going to do now? Be a cashier again? How am I going to explain the big 6 year gap in my employment history on a job interview? Im 26 years old and I have no skills at all. Maybe I could be a waiter. I still wasnt sure what town wed be moving to, so I couldnt really think of my job opportunites at the moment. It cant be some little town where there were no jobs to be found.

I finally did drift off to sleep after I made myself stop worrying for now. My shoulder, where the wound was, didnt hurt at all yet and I was glad the pain killers were still working. Im glad they didnt make me all goofy, too. I didnt want to be acting all stupid while Bella was still hurting. I didnt want to be a burden to her, ever. Then I thought of Charlie again. Hed be sure to hate me now. Almost as much as I hated myself for putting him into the whole situation in the first place. Not that he loved me before last nights events. Would that mess things up between Bella and I? No. I decided not to let it. I would work extra hard to earn Charlies friendship. Id make him forgive me, somehow. I would carry him everywhere if it would make things alright between us. Would he go back to Forks? Would he think of coming with us? If we did the witness protection thing, he and Bella could come with Katie, Ben, Angela and I to wherever theyd send us. Hed have to. I couldnt think of Bella leaving Charlie behind, and hed never know where she was or be able to see or talk to her again. I cant let Bella lose her father because of me, too. She would resent me, in time. He would have to come with us. Then I thought of Katherine and Joseph. And something inside me began to hurt some more. I just got back in contact with them. I couldnt just vanish now. I thought of myself telling themthat Id never be able to see them again. Katherineher heart would break. Shed never accept it. She wouldnt let me go. Knowing her, shed rather load up with weapons and hunt every man in Victorias family before shed allow me to just disappear. Joseph had a very quiet way, Katherines exact opposite. He would look sad and hug me, wishing me well, and that would hurt me just as much as Katherines protests. One thing is for sure. Were not out of the woods yet. But the wolf is dead. Now we just had to find our way out of the darkness. Good thing I have light. Bella is my light. With her, I knew Id be alright. We can do this. I can make this work. I swore with my whole heart that I would. I felt Bellas leg curl over both of mine and it was like a drug had been shot into my IV. I felt a calming magic flowing through my veins.and again, I fell asleep, smilinglaying with my angel. We will be okay. I know we will.

BPOV I was finally allowed to see Charlie. I dont know why but I was so afraid, entering his room. What would I say? Should I just hug him? Would he let me? What if he pushed me away? Edward was fine at the moment. After our nap, I went and got him his cherry icee, which he went absolutely nuts over when I snuck it into his room. I got big hugs and kisses for that. I also brought him his nightshirt, the one Id bought him when I changed Rule number one, along with his nice flannel pajama pants. As much as I loved his naked body, I didnt want the nurses gawking at him. He is mine. No other eyes will ever see that stunning body of his again. Only mine.

He was so happy when I dressed him and put the straw to his lips, watching him suck up the thick, cold cherry juice. He is so easy to please. Giving him this icee today, hed acted like I just gave him a new Ferrari. And it wasnt fake, either. He genuinely loved it. Any act of affection or kindness to him was rare and more precious than oxygen. I would make him get used to it. I promised to make his days full of these little I love yous that didnt have to be spoken with words. My mouth fell open while he sucked harder. I could watch that all day. God, I need help. I knocked on the door very timidly and after a little pause, I heard his gruff voice. Come in., Charlie said, no pleasure at all in his tone. I swallowed, took a breath and forced my hand to pull open the door, stepping in. I stood there, as if I were a stranger. I noticed just as I entered, Charlie tossed a white pillow over his legorwhere his leg shouldve been. I was afraid to look there so I didnt, right now. Then I felt bad for not being stronger for him. He needed me, too, now. I looked at my fathers face instead of his legs and I saw a look of shame and almost embarrassment there. I didnt understand that. He had no reason to be ashamed. Thats supposed to be my face now, not his. I thought hed look angry or hate me and that Id see that in his eyes. Instead he softened his gaze and gave me a little smile. Hi Bells., he said, the affection and care still in his voice as he greeted me. I burst out, crying, and I ran to him, throwing my arms around his neck, my tears already wetting his green hospital gown. His face was stubbly but I didnt care. I just sobbed and clung to himand his arms hugged me back, his mouth placing a single kiss on my head. Come on, now., he finally said, his voice low and deep as he quickly rubbed my back, None of that stuff, now. Im fine. Turn off the water works. Thats Charlie all over. He hates attention. And he hates when I cry, too, just like Edward. I straightened up, standing at his side, the tears all over my face as I wiped them, using my sweatshirt sleeve to dry my eyes. He sighed. Shit happens., he said with a tone of finality, Serves me right for wishing I could have some action. Careful what you wish for, I guess. My voice cracked more than once and it was high pitched, like a five year olds. Im so sorry, Daddy., I blubbered, just like a naughty kid. Then I sobbed some more as Charlie rolled his eyes. Hey., Charlie cut my crying jag off right away and I halted, looking at him through my watery pupils, Enough. Im alive. Youre alive. I got what I prayed for. I have to be more particular next time I make a deal with God. I forgot to throw in, let me keep all my body parts.

That was my Dads attempt at a joke, believe it or not. I saw his dry smile and I had to smile myself, laughing through my tears. Thats my girl., he smiled a little more, the bravest and strongest man Id ever known. God damn it, how I respected him now. I was wiping my eyes some more when he asked me, Hows everyone? They told me everyone made it out alright. Oh., I took a deep breath, Yea. Emmetts here, hes fine. Jasper, Alice, Rosalie, theyre all fine, too. I almost told him about Edward but wasnt sure if he wanted to hear it or not. I was afraid how hed feel about Edward now. And, he waited, raising his brows, Hows Edward? Fine., I shivered, He lost some blood but Emmett donated his. Hes awake and hesgood. Hes already his old self again. Old self. Ive known him for two weeks. Good., he answered, looking towards the window to his left. Dr. Bella crept back inside me suddenly and I dared to ask. How do you feel about him now, Dad?, I was appalled at my guts, Do you hate him? He let out a long sigh and I stared at the black hairs on his arm, afraid to make eye contact. No, Bella, I dont hate him., he said blankly, He took a bullet for you. I can never hate him. I chose to help. I wanted to help him. Im a cop. Thats my job. I just have some shit to deal with now. I guess God decided Id been bored for too long. He decided to throw me some new curves. Thats life, Bella. Id rather be missing a legthan to watch you throw a rose into a hole, crying over that kid. I blinked and new tears fell out and I couldnt talk for a minute. My throat felt blocked. I love you, Daddy., I croaked the words out, sniffling and wiping my eyes. I love you, Baby., he said, full of tenderness. I reached out and held his hand and it gripped mine firmly. Im going back to Forks, as soon as these yahoos let me outta here. Charlie informed, not one to beat around the bush. I felt my brows crease as I thought over what he was saying. Too many questions came to mind to even list them all but I never got time to sort them all out. I want you to come with me, Bella., he stated out flatly, looking straight ahead, into nothingness. I felt like I was just slapped across the face. He wanted me to go with him. How could I say no now? What about school? Edward?

Im not going into any witness protection program., he continued, each word killing me more, Im a cop, the chief of police. I dont need to hide. I know how to protect myself. I can protect you, too, Bella. I want you with me. Flabbergasted, I heard my voice stumbling as I tried to vocalize. Dad, I huffed, sniffling, then, Iyou.I have school here. Ive made a life hereI cant just---why would you Theres a college in Forks., Charlie informed, still staring anywhere but in my eyes, And frankly, I think youve learned a little too much here in New York. For Gods sake, Bella, your teacher almost kidnapped you! He chained you up and--This is a sick town. A sick life. Even Edward said so when he told me to take you home. He even wants a better life for you than this. That was before!, I felt the hot tears coming hard now, He loves me! I love him! After all we went through the other nightwe can finally be together now. I said I wouldnt leave him. We were all supposed to do witness protection together! I sounded pathetic, like a sixteen year old girl, but I couldnt help it. My feelings were coming out, as honestly and purely as possible. My fathers face looked so cold nowonly moments ago he was loving me and smiling at me. I hated him. A deep primal part of me hated him for trying to stand between Edward and I. But at the same time, I couldnt hate him. He saved Edward. He saved Emmett. He lost his leg, his lifefor themfor me. How could I deny him anything at this point? He knew I couldnt. And thats why he was asking. How could I say yes to him? If you go into witness protection, with him, Charlie said, his voice and face like stone, I can never see you again. You will never see me again. This program is for life, Bella. Youll marry him, have kids togetherand Ill never get to see themever. Ill die never knowing what happened to youalone. I cried and turned away from him and then spun back, fierce and loud. Why ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?!, I scream/cried at him, then quieted, weeping, How can you make me choose? I cant! Its not fair, Dad, this isnt FAIR! Life isnt fair, Bella., Charlie showed no emotion still, I taught you that a long time ago. We lost Mom when you were ten. That wasnt fair but it happened. I dont want to lose you now. Youre all Ive got. I sobbed and went to the window, just staring out at the cars and grass and sky as I cried, seeing Edwards face staring back into mine. Im sorry, Bella., he said after a few minutes of letting me have my cry, I dont want to hurt you. I want you happy. He wont make you happy, Bella. He cant. As much as he may want to, and mean well, and love youand I believe he doesbuthesbroken. I see that every day. Hes been through Hell and back and through Hell again. Hes dark, Bella. Hes lived in that world for so long, hes used to it. He cant just walk out and be normal now. You know it, too, being a psychology student. Tell me Im wrong. I panted, hating every word he was saying. I could never agree with him. This is Edward hes talking this way about. I wanted to hurt him. Like he was hurting me now, not just a physical hurtbut a deeper one.

Being a cop had made Charlie hard, and he stopped believing that people could change and have a second chance. But then I realized, he lost my mother to breast cancer. Hed already been hurt so deeply, where the lover inside him livedand was gone forever now. I couldnt believe hed let me take the same loss as hed suffered. He was never the same after Mom diedand I would be forever changed without Edward. I fix broken, Dad. Thats what I do!, I said, almost sneering as I stared out into the setting sun. Twilight. Where Edward had had his epiphany on the boatwhere he decided to change his life and fight back, despite the dangers. Where he became strong. I prayed for that same strength now. Fixing people is supposed to be your career, not your love life., Charlie pointed out, And youre still only a student. Youre not good enough yet to fix him and his problems. He needs a real doctor now, Bella. You shouldnt be playing at this. Mess up and the consequences could be fatalfor himand you. He would never hurt ME!, I flared and faced him again. Bella, Ive SEEN it!!, he shouted, Depressed people cling onto someone ANYONE just so long as they can get their faces above water! They dont even think about how theyre yanking you down under it!! When his problems become too heavy, when he fails at making it in the normal world, hell snap. Hell be heartbroken. He loves you because he thinks you have his cure! He feels healthy with you. And why not, every other woman he knows has only hurt and used him. Its not real love for him, Bella. I doubt he even knows what real love is anymore. He fell for you because he believes you can fix him. And when you cant, he might decide to take you with him, like Victoria almost did to him ! You DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT HIM! I screamed, Hes the most gentle person Ive ever known!! Im not talking about sex, Bella., Charlie clenched his jaw, And yes, I did hear about Mr. Gentle tying you to a stool and spanking you. Jesus H. Christ, I bought you those stools, Bella! I cringed, confused. What do you want, your money back or something?, I asked as he frowned more at me. Look., I took a breath, Im a woman now, Dad. A grown woman. I have sex. I make love. There is nothing wrong with that. Sex is not dirtyand orgasms arent a crime. Edward taught me that. And Im glad. Im not going to be made to feel dirty because I chose to make love to Edward. Thats our business, not yours. You cant marry the very first person who makes love to you, Bella., Charlie turned red as he said this, Youre so young. You should grow some more, your tastes will change as you mature more. Youll outgrow him. I dont want to talk badly of him, but he showed you a few new tricks. He made you feel thingsfor the first time. Thats why you feel you love him. But theres more to marriage than great sex. Theres so much more. Being with him can only end in disaster. Please listen to me, Bella. I know you. Ive known you your whole life. Its going to hurt, leaving him, I know. First love always hurts. No., I turned away, trying not to listen, the tears flowing full on now.

Youve never even had your heart broken yet. Its part of growing up. But, in time, youll heal., Charlie spoke softer now, Youll make new friends, good ones. Youll even fall in love again. Stop it Dad., I cried, my voice cracking everywhere. I know it seems impossible to you now, but its true., Charlie vowed, You can find a nice boy in Forks. Have your degree. Have your own office. Have a nice family. You wont have to glue your husband together all the time and hope he stays in one piece. Youll have enough of that pressure on you when you are a doctor. You wont want that in your home life, your love life. I closed my eyes and didnt even want to picture a life without Edward in it. I felt sick. Let me put it this way, Bella., Charlie said, the empty voice back again, I lost my leg. I am going back to Forks. Its my home. Its our home. I need you to go with me. I need you, Bella. PleaseIdont know if I can do this alone. My fathers voice cracked. It never cracked. I turned to him, seeing for the first time, fear in his dark eyes. This wasnt only about me choosing Edward or leaving himhe was afraid. And he needed me. He never told me that before. I shivered, staring at the moving cars in the parking lot out the windowI clutched onto the curtainsand I felt so cold. So alone.

36 BPOV Alright, hold onto me, I said as I led Edward into my apartment lobby, making him put his good arm around my shoulder, wishing hed lean on me more as we ignored the mailbox and neared the stairs. Bella, my legs are fine., he chuckled, Not that I dont like this. He leaned his head on me and smiled, nuzzling and kissing my cheek with this wonderful, deep kiss. God, I felt that in my toes! I laughed, feeling so damn good that I was bringing him back home. You dont want your mail?, Edward pointed his finger at the mailbox wall with the hand that was over my shoulder. I smiled at him and a devilish little smile rested on those shiny wet lips of his. Baby steps., I reminded, You just got out of the hospital, Thumper. If you tried to attack me now, I think youd only hurt yourself. He whined like a kid denied candy. We began our ascent up the stairs and, being the little punk he is, he was making sure both feet were on each step as we climbed up, doing real baby steps, his smile waiting for me to react. I heard the Thumper story, by the way., I grinned, raising a brow. Oh God!, Edward winced, turning a light shade of pink. He blushes? It was very interesting., I teased, Even the non X rated parts.

Note to self:, he slowly kept up his baby steps on the stairs, Erase the Thumper story from Bellas brain. I can just see youdoing your thing with those little ears on your head., I leaned in closer and kissed his neck, up under his ear and earned his soft moan at that. Emmett put them on me., he informed, I was chained up so I couldnt take them off. I heard the story., I said, trying to forget the sexual parts. I loathed thinking of Emmett vs. Edward in a fucking contest on Halloween night. Itd been Victorias warped idea of fun, pitting her two favorites against each other, lines of clients and women friends of hers waiting their turn. Ten bucks you cant guess who won that little challenge. Yes, Frankencock rules! But, since Edward was wearing these cute little bunny ears the whole time, the women started calling him Thumper, a double meaning. His ears werent the only reason he got his name, Im sure. I think thats when Victoria mightve started to favor Edward over Emmett. It seems, according to Emmett, that there were a bunch of these little competitions she put them both through. Even Emmett told me in the waiting room, Edward was a machine. He always won. Yet he was never a bad winner. He was always kind, always a friend, Emmett added. My life was so gross before you., he said, not with any sadness, but with a glad voice, This Halloween well go trick or treating with Katie. I cant wait for that. Maybe you can be a little bunny this time. I smiled, liking that picture. He kissed me on the lips as we were almost at the top of the stairs. A white little bunnywith a puffy cotton tail., he kept visualizing. Men. I sensed his lower parts were alive and well, and not feeling the effects of the gunshot wound at all. In fact, after a couple days of no play at all, I feared Frankencock would pounce the second we got inside my apartment. WellI didnt FEARjust hoped. And what will you be?, I asked, picturing him in a wolf costume, taking me from behind in the forest. Or maybe a hunter? Hmmmm., he was pondering, I dont knowmaybe Ill do something different this year and just be myself, whoever that is. He kissed me again and my stomach felt so light and fluffy. I love that idea., I approved, I cant think of a sexier outfit than that. Bella Swan, he smiled and was kissing me again, my lips moving against his full force, I think youre trying to seduce me. Not yet., I opened my mouth and licked my tongue lightly onto his, Wait til we get inside. Mmmm, he kissed between words, What.are yougoing to do.to me?

Oh, its going to be terrible, I grabbed his t-shirt and twisted it in my fist, leading him to my door, my lips opening and closing over his sweet, sugary mouth. Youll fight like an animal, but, I kissed him again, You wont escape me I cant fight all that hard., he let me back him into the door as I fully French kissed him now, Im so weak and helpless. He moved his injured shoulder and I grabbed his neck hard, moving his face to the right as I had my way with his muscular neck, licking and bitingkissing and sucking. Fuck!, Edward panted, letting his duffle bag hit the floor as his hands took off on their own now. His fingers clutched at my denim ass cheeks, and we kissed like savages, not coming up for air even. Then he was rubbing roughly over my jeans between my legs and I let out a loud yelp, I had been without those fingers for too long. I opened my legs more and rubbed myself against his jeans, feeling a thick, hard rod there. Edward winced and hissed as I broke our kiss only for a moment so I could place my nose on the other side of his, kissing with new vigor. We werent even in the door yet. My keys were in my purse and I had no intention of getting them now. His fingers were desperate and began to undo my jeans button, and I think he broke the zipper as he yanked my jeans apart there, shoving them down off my butt. My panties were still on but not for long. He made another sound of displeasure and yanked them down, too, muttering something about not one piece of underwear will be left when Im done. Bella, he kissed me again as I showed no shame or tried to hide my naked parts in the hall, in front of my door. No one would come up here, as my apartment was the only one on this floor. And if someone did come up, I didnt really care. I needed Edward now. And Im not ashamed. Gimme., I tugged at his jeans now, undoing them as fast as I could. Edward whimpered, watching me and enjoying the feeling of me yanking his pants off. I was ready to make a comment about his underwear in return but there was no underwear. I secretly thanked whatever angel it was for not letting me snag Edwards skin in the zipper when I tugged it down so viciously. Id have to make a mental note of his fetish for not wearing undies. Id have to be more careful in the future. Now that the air touched his cock he moaned out loud, relieved and aroused to the fullest. He sank down the door and sat on his ass, bringing my hips to him as I straddled the tall pillar of flesh and muscle that was calling to me. I looked at the bare flesh there and felt my whole body flush with heat. Im sure I was blushing and I didnt care. Bella, he kissed me, ready to do me right there in front of my locked door.

Maybe he thought I was hesitating because we were in the hallway. That wasnt it. I felt excited about us doing it right here, so close to people in the middle of the afternoon. Fuck me, Bella.fuck me, please, he whispered, begging for me. I couldnt believe it. He was pleading for me? What lottery in heaven or hell did I win? Maybe he forgot. Edward, I kissed him harder, You forgotyour condom. In a haze of lust, he kept kissing me and moaned, Do you want me to use one? I will if you do I was confused. Dont you always use them?, I kissed him, You saidwhat do you want, Edward? I always had to pull it out of him, his wants. He was always asking me if its alright, what I wanted. I had to make him voice his own wants and desires. Thats when wed start to know who Edward Cullen really is. I dont wanna use one., he said like a little boy as he reached his tongue into my mouth, closing his lips over it, I want to feel you. I dont want anything between usoncejust oncebut I understand if you dont feel safe. I am on birth control., I shared, happy he came right out and told me what he wanted. He is making progress. And he thinks I wouldnt feel safe making love to him with no condom. He has been with lots of sick women. But, stupid as it may sound, I felt perfectly safe. And only with Edward would I just throw caution to the wind to be with him the way he wanted. I want it, too. He waited for me to decide and tell him. I loved him even more for that. I want you inside me, I grunted as our kiss intensified, his hands clutching my hair, I want to feel you, too. Your hot cock. I didnt get to finish my sentence. Edward groaned and devoured my mouth then, hurting my hair with his urgency but that just made me even more hot and wet as he tickled the back of my teeth with that tongue of his. Then I felt the tip of his head against my clit, and I grinded myself harder into it, moving up and down before he entered me. Edward moaned and opened his eyes as he kissed me, asking again if it was alright. I decided to take charge here and do what he begged me to do. Fuck him. Yes, Im gonna fuck you hard., I clutched his shirt again and forced him to me, grabbing his neck again as he breathed harder, his rock hard dick throbbing and jerking as his eyes looked into mine, so full of desire and want. I grabbed the shaft of his cock and he bit back a shout as I moved it slowly up and down, teasing him. He had gone awhile without this and I knew it was killing him. He whimpered like a little puppy and that drove me wild.

Please, please, please, please., he whispered, closing his eyes, digging his fingers into my ass, coaxing me towards him. I hated sounding like Victoria but I was caught up in the moment and hoped I wasnt making a mistake here. Mine., I said as I played with his warm, thick cock. Yesyes.yes, he whimpered, opening his eyes and showing me he was not put off by my word. He wanted to be mine. He knew I wouldnt abuse that, as so many others had in the past. I didnt need chains and whips to make him mine. I used love to hold him to me. The most powerful chains of all. Yes., he gave a little nod, obviously liking this so far. Yes., I repeated, a good word. I placed my ready, wet lips onto his head and he clenched his jaw, growling from the sensation of it. I waited a secondtaking in that perfect faceall the emotions there that I was causing in him. Me, Bella Swanthe nose-in-her-book virgin nobody ever noticed. I was driving Edward Cullen wild. He was begging for me, dieing for me. I drove myself down, impaling him into me without mercy. UUUUHHHHHHH!!!!, Edward screamed out at this, his eyes huge and staring up at me in shock, the whole length of him vanished inside me as I sat there, loving the feeling of his flesh inside mineno condomthis was exhilarating and so much more intense. I felt like I could feel a couple of the veins in him as I tightened my muscles around him a couple of times. After all, Edward hadnt been with a woman without a condom for years, with the exception of Victoria. But I didnt count her. Surely, this would be special and new for him, too. UUUGGGHHH.GOD DAMN IT!!, he slammed his sneaker to the floor a couple of times as his fingers clutched harder into my butt cheeks. It felt like he wanted to move me up and down on him but he restrained himself. He was letting me do this. Patience, Thumper., I toyed a little bit, squeezing together one more time as he tried to hold in a scream, biting down on his bottom lip with force. Bella, he breathed, closing his eyes. Hold on., I couldnt do it to him anymore, he was so utterly beautiful, suffering this way. I had to put him out of his misery. And I began moving up and down, coming down hard, our flesh slapping each time they found each other. I was moaning and panting for breath, loving the feeling of this high I was experiencingand watching Edward while I did himwasunbelievable. His face could do some pretty awesome things while hes being fucked. Not to mention his noises. It sounded like he was almost in pain, but then his groans added into those sounds and it was a very erotic song to my ears as I bounced harder, hearing him cry out as he thrust his hips up now as I was coming down. Now I was yelling, too. Every body okay up there?, some man called out from downstairs.

I almost laughed at Edwards face. Yes, fine!, I called down and smiled at my angel, putting my hand over his open mouth, clasping it shut, So fine. I added that last part, looking into his eyes, complimenting what I saw there. He is the finest thing I had ever seenor feltor heard. MMMMMM, he closed his eyes and hummed under my fingers as I kept going. In seconds, Edward wasnt sitting up against my door anymore, he was laying down on his back, I guess tired of the back of his head hitting the door every time I came down on him. Yes, baby, thats it. Close your eyes and let me fuck you good. Move those hipsGod, yes!! Oh, you are an alien, Edward, do you know that? No human man could be like this. It looked like Edward really enjoyed having my hand over his mouth and I felt his tongue lapping my fingers from beneath them. I didnt mind. I, too, had enjoyed being captured and gagged by rapist Edward that day in my apartment. I was not going to analyze him now. Just enjoy him. I love the sound of his ass hitting the wooden floor below each time he withdraws his thrust. And it was fucking thrilling doing it right in the hallway on the floor, even hotter when someone had called out to us, hearing our noises. I was getting close to coming now and I knew I could keep fucking him even if I did, but then I heard him growling under my hand and his hips bucked with more ferocious need. It will be soon for Edward. I recognized those growls. Edward became a rabid dog when in the throws of orgasm. I decided to talk dirty again, he liked that, especially from shy, innocent little me. You think youre gonna cum soon?, I asked coyly, Is that what you think? Whimpering and growlinggood. Why should I let you cum?, I asked, keeping my hand tight over those lips while I kept slamming up and down on him. Then he playfully pointed to his bandages that laid bulky under his t-shirt. And a little chuckle mixed in with is moans and growls. I smirked, liking how nothing was ever off limits with him. He was always the first to joke about himself, even if it wasnt that funny to others. Oh, I see., I played along, You got hurt for me and you think youre entitled to cum, huh? He nodded and was losing control over the dog rising up in his throat. I wondered how long he could hold it back if he had to. But I didnt want to play Victoria games with him, I just wanted to be sexy and in controlwithout going too far into her wicked territory. It was a fine lineI had to be careful never to cross, even in play. You have a good point., I felt myself sweating as I kept my pace quick, Alright, cum. Cum inside me. I liked the image of his little semen guys being able to flow inside me for the first time, instead of being trapped in a plastic cocoon.

Yes, I saw Look Whos Talking and loved that part in the beginning. Sue me. Edward roared out, despite my hand holding his open mouth, and exploded the second I told him to. He was holding it for a little while. Why that turns me on, Im not sure, but it did. I felt hot melty liquid inside me and thats when I shut my own mouth and cried out with my own orgasm, too. I didnt realize it, but Id been holding mine back also. It feels so much better when you restrain it then let it go. Wow. I think someone is hurt up there., the mans voice was saying from below again, to someone else down there, Im going up for a sec. Shit! Edwards eyes opened and stared up at me in shock as footsteps started to come up the stairs. I turned, still on top of Edward, and zipped open my purse, getting the keys. Thank God they were right on top. Theyre usually buried at the bottom and I have to go digging for them. I reached up and fumbled with the key, opening the door, and somehow standing and dragging Edward in, sliding his ass on the floor, using his good arm to reel him in, slamming the door seconds before anyone reached the top of the steps. I held a hand to my chest for a second, locking the door twice from inside as Edward laid on his back on the linoleum floor, howling with laughter as he stared at the back of my ass, my jeans and panties around my knees as I stood over him. Whats so funny now?, I asked, then burst out laughing, too. He is so fucking cute when he laughs like that. I remembered that day I almost went out with my robe on. He was doing the exact same thing then as he is now. Only now he was half naked, his cock wet and glistening as he held his stomach, enjoying his fit of giggles. I laid on my back at his side, my own sides splitting as I belly laughed right along with him. It was as if wed never left this placeeven if only for a moment. We had no worries, nothing in our way, only each otherno cares in the world. It was glorious and I knew it wouldnt last longbut I enjoyed the moment anyway. Are you hurt?, I asked him, concerned as I got on my knees and pulled my shirt up and off my head, tossing it across the room as I unhooked my bra in front, letting my breasts loose as his eyes looked up at me, appearing a bit drowsy as he took me in. Yes., he said, out of breath, Very. The pain isexcruciating. Im sure he wouldve tried to take off his shirt if it werent for his wound. But instead, he moved it up so it was just pooled under his chin. He laid there as I stood up, kicking off my sneakers and sliding my jeans and panties off. I took the panties and folded them so the crotch was sticking out in a rectangle. Where does it hurt, sweet cock? I made him up a new nickname. He smiled at that and moved his finger over his right nipple. Here., he informed quietly.

Awww., I stuck the panties in his mouth, not too far in, but enough. He moaned and took them in without hesitation, and closed his lips over the cotton, slightly sucking inside, tasting metasting what hed done to me as we went up the stairs together. Theres a lollipop for you while I take care of your boo boos., I said lovingly as he stifled a little laugh. I let my tongue dart out a couple times around his nipple as he sighed in contentment. Then I lapped at it, my thick, wet tongue shoving it up and down, around in circles while his muffled moans embraced me. I was kissing it, then, later, closing and opening my lips over it as it stood up stiffly, wet and warm. Hows that feel now?, I asked, using my deep sexy voice. He nodded quickly, his eyes opening and finding me a couple inches downward. Anything else hurt? He nodded, smiling as half my panties hung out of his clenched teeth. What a little devil. My little devil. Theres a good idea for a Halloween costume. What else hurts, baby?, I asked, deciding to spoil him rotten today and all night if he wanted. Then he pointed to his other nipple and I couldnt help give another giggle. Oh, now this one hurts, huh?, I smirked as he nodded with more energy. So I went over and gave extra loving care to that nipple as well. I even bit this one a little after I had it nice and licked. Now Edward was growling a little. This wasnt the rabid dog yet. This was the sweet dog that was begging to go outside into the yard. Okay, noted. Edward likes to be bitten. And then, looking down, I saw Frankencock again. God, that was fast! He is an alien! And whos complaining? No wonder Edward won that contest against Emmett. Something else hurt, hon?, I hovered right over his eyes this time. He smiled and gave a slow nod now. I wonder what could be hurting you now., I smiled and acted dumb, Let me see if I can find it. He gave a throaty laugh as I kissed every spot I adored on him from his chin, down under it,,,to his neck, the adams appleYUM.the hollow at the base of his neckdown his chest between his peckshad to kiss all his ribs and the six pack..LOVE that place! And I made my way down to kiss both cuts of his pelvis. His ankles were still trapped in his jeans and sneakers and I liked that. No getting away for you, Thumper. Rabbits can jump so fast, you know.

Uh oh, I gasped, I think I might have found something. He laughed again, liking this game. I know I was loving it. What is this big thing?, I moved my fingers up and down itmaking it slick and wet all over as he moaned and gave a little whimper. I dont have one of these., I wondered aloud as he chuckled again, peeking down at me. I remembered my lesson that Edward gave me on our first night together, when he didnt want to take me yet. When he wanted me to be comfortable and get to know his body, inside and out. Oh, wait, I think I remember., I smiled more as he watched me. These are the balls., I stroked and lightly squeezed the dark pink sack below Edwards penis as he groaned out loud, through my panties, his fists clenching near his face as he watched me explore. I licked them and sucked them into my mouth, making them nice and wet as Edward nearly screamed, clenching his eyes tight, his back arching up as I made slobbery noises, not letting them leave my mouth as I sucked harder. I licked every inch of them, swirling my tongue on top and underneath. FUCK!! FUCK!!, he said through the panties, and slammed a fist to the floor at his side, almost gasping. Note: Edward likes his balls sucked, too. Maybe too much. He sounds in pain. But I think he likes it. Frankencock just grew twice as big as it was before. Taking my mouth off those, he panted and stared up at the ceiling as if his brain had shut off And.this is the head., I recalled aloud, taking only the head into my mouth now, licking it wetly and curling my tongue around it hard while he kept hissing and growling, almost in protest, but not. Sometimes it can hurt too good. Or feel so good that it hurts. Yea, thats it. Pleaseplease., he whispered, muffled by my panties. Oh, am I teasing him ? Poor little thing. Wellnot little. What?, I asked, ignorantly, Im just trying to find out what hurts so muchshhhhlet me find it. RRRRR, Edward turned his head away, clenching his eyes again. Both his fists were back up over his head nowand one grabbed hold of his own hair. This big long thing, I licked up once from bottom to top as he groaned. Whats the name of this thing again?, I played, I think I remember you telling me oncelet me think Edward was suffering so lovely again. I know its horrible but his face is so damn sexy when its like that. Umtheschlong?, I wondered, No, thats not it. Theschmigeggy?, I guessed, Nopenope

He growled again, warning me. I almost laughed. Payback would be a bitch when he got his turn against me. Oooh, see me quiver? Honestly, I did hope hed get a little rough with me later. I had really enjoyed that. Oh wait wait!, I acted like it just came to meTheshaft?! I took it all into my mouth then, all the way in until it was resting at the back of my throat. I relaxed my throat, not wanting to gag. But then, men love it when they hear you gag on their cocks. At least, Edward does. UGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!, Edward yelled out as I stopped teasing him and let my mouth salivate all over him as he lay inside me. Before long, it was soaking wet inside my mouth and I spun my tongue around every inch of him, squeezing and releasinglapping, nibbling very delicately. Edward was nearly screaming by the time I was letting him fuck my mouth. I was moving up and down him fast and hot as he grabbed my hair and thrust his hips up and down with the stamina of ten men. This was rough and I was secretly loving it. I love when he becomes a brute and makes me do things to please him. He was snarling like a beast, grunting as he moved my head faster, his head striking the back of my throat occasionally, forcing the choking and gagging sound from me, the noises only making him more desperate to have me. He growled out again, holding my head tight, my lips at the very base of his cock and his head even poking down my throat a bit as he came, the hot juice going right down without even gracing my tongue before it was gone. A few seconds later, as Edward panted, trying to catch his breath, he began to stroke my hair instead of clutching it. His fingers moved along my face, over my eyebrows, smoothing over my closed eyelids as I kissed his inner thigh, opening my mouth and sucking the flesh there insidebiting downsucking harder. He did a sharp intake of breath and watched, but didnt stop me. I know its a teenage thingbut Id never given a hickey before. It didnt seem right. But it did now. I wanted my mark on him, my name written right beside his beautiful penis, like an eternal star being trapped in the orbit of the moon. I wouldnt mind being that star, gazing at him for eons of time as worlds came and went below usforever caught in his webloving every minute of it. I hoped he wouldnt get mad at me for doing this, I thought as I stopped, seeing an angry dark purple circle below me. Im sorry., I rubbed it with my fingers and Edward hissed. Are you kidding?, he asked, daring to take the panties out of his mouth, Thats the hottest thing. I want your marks, Bella. Do it again. On the other thigh. He smiled and put the panties back into his teeth, almost like a cigar. And he laid his head back and closed his eyes, wanting me to write my name all over him. That is the hottest thing. He was looking down at me, admiringly, waiting for me to do it again.

I couldnt disappoint him. I licked up his other thigh, right beside his penis, and chose a spot while he moaned his sweet sounds to me. I opened my mouth and sucked the skin insidewetting and licking.suckingbiting, harder this time. He yelled out and arched his back again, panting, whispering, Dont stopdont fucking stopoh, BellaGod! Finally, after a few more minutes, I had to stop. I think this mark is going to be almost black. It was a nice dark violet. Wow, he was panting as I crawled up to lay my face on his chest, on the unhurt side of it. I kissed his nipple softly and he breathed it again, Wow. I snuggled in as his arm came around me, his fingers circling around my nipple. Tell me what you think of me., I whispered, playing a little bit again, Its okayyou can say it. He smiled, taking the panties out of his mouth and laying them on his forehead, as if he needed to use them to wipe away the perspiration. Youare one hot bitch., he breathed, MYhot bitch. Only mine. You make me crazy. My body burns for you. Just you. No one makes me feel like you do. I know its not rightto sayafter having sexbutI love you, Bella. You bring me back to life. You make me real. I like you, too., I giggled as he pinched my nipple in response while I struggled a little, squealing. Youre learning., I hugged him closer to me, When we met , you were such a virgin. But just look at you now. He smiled and sucked his cheeks in a bit, his lips curling up into a wicked little bow. And you were such a little slut., he came back brilliantly, Taking off your shirt to make me eggs in the first ten minutes we knew each other! I was so disgusted I nearly kicked you right out! I thought, how am I gonna make this one into a proper young lady I can take home to Katherine? I was laughing so hard and he was, too. Omelete de Bella indeed!, he finished, giggling with me. And youre still a slut now., he laughed and I bit his nipple as he held me against his warm, moist body, You havent learned a thing! We calmed down and quieted, relaxing in the dim light of the kitchen. It looked like maybe it was getting rainy outside, no sun was pouring in. Lets not try to change each other., I kissed his chest, above the nipple this time. I said that so hed understand. I wouldnt be trying to change him to be some normal, respectable citizen over night. I want him to be the same sweet, fun, playful Edward I loveI just wanted to take the sadness out of his eyes, the downcast eyes had to gobut everything elseI wanted to keep it exactly the same.

How aboutI change for the better, he said, And you stay perfect, like you are right now. No, Edward., I danced my fingers along his ribs, doing his mice skating thing on his skin, I love you just as you are. The only thing I want you to change is the way you see yourself. Dont change. Just see all the beautiful things that I see. Ill have to talk to my therapist about that., he smiled, both his arms, even his weaker one, wrapped around me. We laid there for a long time, just being with each other, not talking. Just moving our hands over each other, studying every inch and curve, as if wed been apart for 3 years, not days. I refused to think of Charlie now. I refused to think of what I was going to do. Who Id be going with. But as I thought of that, a tear escaped out of my right eye. I wiped it fast and Edward didnt notice or see it. If he did, he never said anything about it. Which isnt like him. So Im sure he didnt see. Bella?, Edward finally spoke, ending the silence. Yea? Can we have a session tonight?, he asked, hopefully, After I made you a nice dinner? I hope hes not still thinking he has to do all the cooking and cleaning. Can I help you make it?, I asked, just as hopefully, Youre not my servant, you know. I can make dinner sometimes. You can cook? No. Not really. Can I help you make it?, I repeated, hearing his laugh as I giggled, too. I thought so., he said with a low voice, Yesyou can help. I can teach you. Its fun, really. I bet a root canal would be fun with YOU., I replied, voicing my exact thoughts instead of holding them in. It felt so great. Oooh, dentist fantasy., he said darkly. No, no, I halted him right there, putting my hand over his lips lightly. VVVRRRRR!!! VVRRRR!!!, he imitated a dentists drill perfectly. NO!, I repeated as he rolled over on top of me, his eyes deadly as his brow arched, looking very sinister, Edward, no! He held my face and said, Open. , asking to see my teeth. No, you open!, I managed to slip out of Edwards grasp. I think he let me get away. He sat up and kicked off his sneakers, and kicked out of his jeans.

Edward., I backed a step or two as he stood up, in his total naked glory, his eyes playful but dangerous now as he took one slow step towards me. Youre forever drinking those icees, Miss Swan., Edward said, Ill bet theres at leastthree cavities just lurking in that little mouth. I laughed and began to back some more, realizing the bathroom was my only sanctuary. Edward Cullen, I warned but since I was smiling I guess he didnt take me too seriously. I spun and fled into the bathroom and he was right on my tail. I didnt even get to close the bathroom door, he was so fast. He slammed it tight behind him as he cornered me in the shower. We always end up here. Maybe hes right. This shower is magical. Time for your cold shower, Miss Swan., he smiled wickedly, taking the showerhead off its perch and turning the faucet towards C. You are a very dirty, hot girl., he added. My session tonight is going to be covering this thing you have with cold water, Edward! I warned, pointing at him, the demonic smile still in place on his lips. Fine. Then he pulled the lever, forcing the water out of the showerhead as I screamed, completely helpless against my captor who was determined to hose me down with ice water. Today and tonight was just ours. Tomorrow we could deal with reality. Maybe. Maybe the day after tomorrow.

37 EPOV Bella was standing at the window, still looking down at the police car across the street. I began to wonder that the fascination was after fifteen minutes. They still there?, I asked, smiling at her tiny form. She was wearing her cotton gray sweatpants, socks and long t-shirt. She was so adorable, I knew Id better stay in the kitchen or Id only jump her again. I remembered a couple hours ago and smirked at myself. I couldnt even wait to get into the apartment. This is what she does to me. Im glad the cops checked the place out before we ascended the stairs, to make sure there were no bombs or would be killers waiting inside. They told us theyd be out there, protecting usfor 48 hours. Then we had to make a choice. Witness protectionor nothing. I remember feeling all warm and fuzzy inside at their concern for our lives.

Charlie was also being protected, still in the hospital. His wounds and leg held him in the hospital longer than my one clean gunshot that had luckily not hit anything major, just nicked an important artery. I never considered myself luckyuntil the day I first came to this apartmentuntil the day I belonged to Isabella Swan. I still couldnt get over it that my body had not been enough to stop the bullet Victoria shot at me. Am I really that much of a shadow? That even bullets whiz right through my flesh and muscle? If it did pass through me and hit Bella, then Id have done it for nothing. We both wouldve been hurtor killed. I had told Bella this as we laid in bed together at the hospital and she put that thought right away. It means something to me., she had said, so softly, Even if the bullet had hit mewhat you did means everything to me. You risked everything to protect me. What if youd have died, Edward? Youd never see Katie again. I cant believe youd do something sostupidsoheroicI love you, Edward. It was the first heroic thing Id ever done in my existence. I felt ten times more a man since that bullet hit me. Id never take that moment back, even if it had hit me right through the heart. But then, Id left my heart as Bellas place when I departed for Fire. I knew it was safe. Uh huh., she said in the present, and turned away from the window, sighing. Her damp hair looked black and curly as she timidly walked over my way now, watching me as I placed things down on the counter. Hey, I thought you were helping me, here. I reminded, taking my shirt off carefully, using it again as my apron, tucking the sleeves into my jeans. I love seeing her turn pink when I do that. Chop that up in little pieces., I instructed, glad to have her as my assistant. This would be a lot of fun, teaching Bella how to cook. It was one thing I could teach her that she could tell friends and family about. Yea, it is getting hot in here, isnt it?, she asked as I placed a pepper down on a cutting board in front of her, along with a nice cutting knife. I turned away, going to the fridge and getting the chicken. I opened my mouth to say something but what I saw knocked me out. Bella was standing there, chopping the pepper.and her t-shirt was over her waist like an apron, the sleeves tucked into her pants. Her pert breasts pouted out and bounced a little with every chop she cut. I didnt even realize I had dropped the chicken until Bella laughed at me and bent down to pick it up. Her hair was so dark against her creamy white skin. God damn it! Well never get to eat. I can see myself losing a finger when Im trying to chop onions. My eyes will never be able to leave that gorgeous sight. Hello?, she laughed, blushing, Edward? Anybody home? Uh, I heard my voice stalling, Yes, Im home. That made sense. She laughed at that.

What about these little seeds?, she asked, as if everything were normal, Do they go in? Seeds? I asked, forgetting what seeds are. Oh SEEDS!, I woke up, seeing the little white bits on the cutting board, No, no seeds. Cut them out. She laughed, liking the reaction she was getting out of me. What a little brat. Id have to punish her later for this. Then I felt a little guilty for doing the exact same thing to her that first morning Id stripped my shirt off while I made her eggs. I would pay big money to know what she was thinking or dreaming while I cracked the eggs and whisked them into liquid that day. I remember her beet red face staring at anything but my face. Im glad I didnt take my jeans off, too. I had pondered that but Bella was so innocent. Id decided to have a little mercy on her the first day. I remembered something else, too. When she gave me the check, paying me for the next two weeks, I had told her, promised her that she wouldnt be sorry. Thats the first lie I told her. I shook my head now and tried to snap out of it. Id seen Bellas breasts before, why is this making me stupid? I began to cut the plastic wrap, freeing the chicken, trying to just look at it and nowhere else. It didnt help me that I was staring down at chicken breasts, either. Damn, it is getting hot in here. Am I sweating? Do I smell ? I wanted to sniff under my arms but Bella was watching me too closely. This is fun., she smiled as innocently as a little girl playing housewife. Yea, fun. Im about to lose my fingers here. Well be having chicken and finger bits for dinner. I think Ive created a monster here., I teased, glancing over at her, the orange glow of the setting sun from the window coloring her flesh, making it look goldenso flawless. I thought the idea was for you to change me, not the other way around., I teased. I had rubbed off on her during our time together. Is that a good thing? I know she has improved me for the better already, even though I have a long way to go still. I told you., she smirked as she chopped, I dont want to change you. But I admit, youve definitely affected me, if thats what you mean. Was that affected or infected?, I asked as she laughed and nudged me with her elbow. I like the way I am now, Edward., she confessed, I feel so free. Im not afraid anymore. Right back at you, babe., I said, feeling the exact same things inside of me, thanks to her.

Then she kissed me, soft and gently at firstand then I began to kiss deeper, unable to hold myself back. Ive just had this woman for hours, all around the apartment. Hell, I even broke my rule and fucked her in the shower. But it was all blissful and mind boggling for me. And now, in the kitchen, cooking, I wanted her again. I fantasized about tying her to the counter, spread eagle with a small tangerine in her mouth, muffling her pleas as I dripped heated oil over her breasts, down a straight line to her belly button. Then Id take a couple spices and sprinkle them on top of thatgarlicmaybe a little cinnamon. Then Id lean over her and taste my masterpiece dish, my heavy, wet tongue roughly moving over the juices Id created on that nipple. She was moaning through the little tangerine and then I looked at her, smiling. I peeled a piece of the tangerines skin off, the part that just pouted out of her mouth, and then I bit into the sweet, thinness of the fruit, and it was almost like I was kissing her. I made a hum sound and opened my mouth again, closing my lips over the tangy juice. Our kiss broke and I was back in reality. Not that I minded. My reality is paradise now. God, Im lucky. Luck, you goddess, dont tire of me yet. Stay with me. Ill never take you for granted again, I swear. Please. Like me. Love me. Dont leave me again. Ill do anything you want. What is it were making, anyway?, she asked, staring up into my lust filled eyes. Its so cute how, still, sometimes, she looks scared of menervous. I guess its understandable. Wed only known each other for two weeks. But, somehow, to me, I feel like weve had years together. And I dont mean that in a bad way. She knows me. She gets me. And most unbelievably, she wants me. She loves me. I forgot., I replied and we both laughed like drunks, our noses together as I leaned in and gave hers a little peck. That cute, little adorable button nose of hers. I kissed it again, longer and softer. Well I know its chickenand it has peppers in it., she tried to figure it out. Lets not try figuring this out., I said with my deep, dark voice as I put my forehead to hers, Lets justmake it. And I kissed her again, putting my knife down on the countermy hands coming up to hold her little face in them, my head turning, kissing her lips from the other side. She whimpered as I backed her to the wall, knocking over her cute little list of important phone numbers. It was typed! And I wasnt on the list. Wed have to remedy that. Update the phone list. But then wed all be moving soon, anyway. Why am I thinking about phone lists now? Our bare chest pressed against each other as my tongue took small licks of her mouth, knocking on the door, asking to come in. If my tongue gets inside, its all over. We will be making love again. Please, Bella, let me in.

She had a little chance to speak as I looked at her, hungrily, not getting entrance into her mouth yet. She shivered as I gave her a look, almost angry with her for not opening the door. I grabbed her arms and moved her a little roughly, up on her tip toes so I could get those wonderful golden breasts, still painted in the twilights touch. I took a wet lick, followed by a deep bite as she gasped and whimpered louder. Ill teach you to deny me entrance, little girl. If you wont let me in, Ill bite my way in. What about dinner?, she asked, as if in a trance, her mind a million miles away. Shes mine. I smiled like Satan, having the finest angel of heaven in my clutches. Later., I began working on the other breast, cupping it in my hand tightly as I licked and sucked, I hate chicken anyway. Then I bit again, gentler this time. Id rather have Bella breasts than chicken breasts anytime. Chicken?, she whispered, Whatschicken? Thats my girl! I kissed her deeper, celebrating. We were sliding down to the floor, the nearby oven preheating, making us hotter as my hands clutched her full, round breasts, my mouth kissing her neck as she moaned louder. I forgot., I finally answered, then asked. Hey, Bella, I kissed her, You ever been fucked silly on the kitchen floor before? She smiled, the room getting darker as the sun outside quickly sank, taking her light with her. Yes, once., she said and I stopped, looking at her. She never told me this before. Was that the 33 second guy? Rosalie and I, she began and my eyes popped out, my body froze. What the fuck? Then she laughed. Gotcha., she giggled at my reaction. You bitch, I half smiled as she laughed harder. She grabbed my face and brought me back to her, kissing me again, effectively shutting me up. And you say I have a sick sense of humor, I muttered as she silenced me again, probing my mouth with her thirsty tongue. Shut up and do me., she demanded, adding loudly, THUMPER! I smirked, liking her style. This is not the same girl I met three weeks ago. Yes, Bella., I obeyed, loving every second of it.

EPOV It wasnt until around eleven that night that wed finally sat down to have our session after dinner. Bella checked out her tape recorder. It had been awhile since wed used it. She put a new tape inside and clicked it shut, hitting the record button. I dont know why but I felt so elated that she was about to say those words. Edwardsession eleven, I think., she said, very professionally. Hello, Edward., she greeted me kindly, as always. Edward Cullen., I corrected, using my full name again, now that I was freeand clean. I could say my whole name without any fear or remorse. She beamed back at me, a thick gaze of pride warming my body. Hello, Edward Cullen., she said with such affection. Hello, Dr. Bella Swan., I said with too much emotion, my eyes adoring her, slaves to her. I wanted to give her the proper respect now, calling her Dr. Bella was childish and disrespectful. I just realized it now and was so sorry. She blushed a little, every light in the place off. Somehow it was easier this way. I remember how much I used to hate it when youd announce the session., I confessed, Nowit makes me so happy. Its likeI know Im about to get better every time you say it now. She looked touched and I thought there were tears in her voice when she paused then said, Im so glad. Thatmeans so much to methat you feel that way. I think, thoughthat this session will be very hardfor both of us. I looked down at my hands. They werent in fists or nervously playing with something anymore. They laid on my legs, restingpeacefully. It was then that I really thought something was being cured inside me. Then I thought on what she was saying. This session is going to be very hard. Yes, I guess shes right. There are a lot of life changing things happening. Tomorrow the federal marshals will be coming here to begin our entry into the witness protection program. I know., I sighed, looking right at her, a dark, bluish figure staring back at me, always honest and direct while she was seated in her chair. So, she took a breath, What are your plans for us? I felt my confused face creep up. Plans? Well, I began, I thoughtwe were all going into the programand meet Katie and Tanyas parents when we get towherever were going. Isnt that the plan? She took a breath and it sounded very shaky to me. Whats wrong?, my voice took on a strict, secretly frightened tone. She didnt answer me. I got more scared.

Whats wrong I said., I repeated, louder and more aggressively. Charlie., she trembled audibly, rubbing her forehead, looking down, Hewont gointo the program. I felt my heart seize and my insides recoiled. Charlies not coming. Shes not coming. If I knew anything about Bella, its that she loves him. And after how he was hurtshe wouldnt let him be alone. Shed take care of him, as a good daughter would. No., I said gravely, staring at my handsthey were shivering now. I was in shock. I would lose Bella. No!, I looked at her, deciding that was not an option for me. My voice was desperate now, not strong anymore. I want to be honest with youalways., she said with a sorrowful voice, avoiding my harsh eyes as they burned into her. No, Bella.no., I kept saying the one word my heart kept screaming. I had to say more. Charlie asked me to go with him., she said, even more fragile than before, I didnt give him a direct answer at the time. But I Ill go with you., I cut in, finding another way, Ill have Ben, Angela, and Katie come to Forks. Its a small town. We can hide there. Dont you think Ive thought of that?, she looked at me, slightly annoyed, then softened her eyes, Victoria knew my whole background. She knows my hometown. Im sure James knows it, too. School records. Theyd find us. I dont care., I spat out and then Bella looked up at me, her eyes hard now. You dont care., she repeated, knowing it was a lie, You dont care that Katie could be kidnapped? Or hurt? Or killed? My stomach sank and so did my eyes. Exactly., she said, having her answer, Besideseven if nothing happenedyoud never feel safe there. Youd never be able to relax there. Alright, I care., I admitted, not wanting to lie in therapy, But youre not going anywhere without me, Bella. I hated the way I said that. So direct, so clingybut I couldnt make myself care that much. I was going to be with her. Edward Bella, I cut her off again, I dont want to hear it. If you go to Forks, Im going with you. If you go to the Moon, Im going with you. If you go to Hell, Im going with you. I know Edward!, she shouted, I know!! This is killing me, too, you know!, she kept her voice loud but I could hear the sadness behind the anger she spoke with.

I cant choose between you and my father, I cant!, she cried, almost saying this to herself. I wanted to be mad at her.and ever angrier at Charlie. But I couldnt do it. Theyd saved me. Theyd set me free. And now they wanted me to walk away, alone? It was beyond cruel. Its like releasing a bird from a cage and then snapping its wings off. What was the point of all this?, I heard my hurt speaking now, Why would you teach me to see myself as more so you could just discard me into a box labeled not good enough?! Instantly, before I could even hear Bella cry, I tried to take that back. Im sorry., I bit down on my teeth, I dont mean that. I know its not you. Youve never made me feel inferior, not even a little bit. In fact, you treat me too well. Charlie thinks it, doesnt he? That Im not good enough for you? She let out a little whimper as she cried, not answering me. That was my confirmation of it. I knew Charlie wasnt crazy about me, but I didnt think hed try to stop us from being together. But then I thought of Katie. If she was in Bellas position, Id have murdered the whore who tried to take her away from me. Im still a whore. Ill always be a whore. Even if twenty years goes by, hell still see me as a whore. Im not clean. Im just living in a new place., I said, emptiness filling my voice and my soul. Thats not true, Edward., Bella was crying, Dont do that to yourself. Youre not a whore anymore. (She cringed, using that word.) Youre mine. Youre perfect. Apparently not., I said quietly, the anger at Charlie building up now, Do you want me to go? Is this your way of saying you dont want me? NO!, she almost yelled it at me. Then Im not going., I stated, simply as that, Im not losing you, Bella. Maybe we could NO!, I clenched my eyes and then opened them, getting her attention, I lost Tanya, I lost KatieI lost everything! Then a thousand years later, when I thought I was dead inside and could never feel anything again, life gave me to you. You made me live again, Bella Swan. And Im not letting ANYTHINGman, time, tragedy, or even GOD take you away from me! I jerked to my feet, going to the door. Where are you GOING?!, she cried harder, chasing me. I looked down at my bare chest and jeans and figured I should put a shirt on. To see Charlie., I informed flatly. The problem was not here, it was in the hospital with Charlie Swan. I was going to straighten this shit out right now. I was yanking my white t shirt on when she blocked me coming out of the bedroom.

Visiting hours are over, Edward., she informed, Youll never get into his room. There are also two cops standing outside his door. Wait until tomorrow. I cant., I gently moved past her, picking up my sneakers. Please, Edward, were still in the middle of a session., she reminded, Dont run out on me. Lets talk some more. You going after Charlie now, mad as you are, is not going to help things. If you want to get somewhere, you have to be calm. How can I be calm when my whole life is about to crumble AGAIN?!, I trembled, hoping she couldnt see it, I cant. I cant just stand by and let this happen to me again. This time, Im fighting back! To the death, if thats what it takes. To the death?, she asked, sounding scared. You know what I mean., I had my sneakers on now and stood up, about to get to the door as she blocked me, putting her back against the door, her arms on the walls beside it. Sit down, Edward Cullen!, she yelled at me, like a teacher would yell at an unruly student. It was sharp enough to stop mefor now at least. I stared at her, my jaw setbut she was stronger than me. Sit. Down., she demandedand I couldnt disobey her. My slave nature is not gone yet, by any means. That would take time to overcome. I sat down, silently, folding my arms, instantly feeling like a third grader. She slowly came and took her chair across from me. Lets calm down., she suggested, We will both take a few deep breaths. Edward? I had tried to ignore her suggestion but then she was staring at me. Like a brat, I inhaled deep and exhaled, the attitude still in me. Againslower., she said calmly, doing it with me this time. By the time we had done it for the fifth or sixth time, I did feel betternot so panicked anymore. For a second, I felt like Bellas son instead of her boyfriend. Good., she said patiently, probably knowing what a baby I could be during the hard sessions, Better, Edward? I pouted for a moment then said, Yes. Thank you., I added a moment later, breaking the silence. Youre welcome., she replied.then waited for me to speak first. Finally, I did. Im in love with you, Bella., I began with the most honest and obvious, This is not some casual two weeks for me. I did love Tanya, but with youits different. I cant explain itI let Tanya go.even before the fire. And every day I wonder to myself, if I hadntmaybe shed still be alive, maybe all this wouldve never happened to me. But thenI wouldnt have you. The point isyoure it for me. Youre my last love. And I think thats even more powerful than first love. I dont want to let you go. I cant. I cant live without you, Bella.

I heard her sniffle but then she became all doctor again. First of all, I love you too., she said, just as calmly as I had spoke, But secondEdwardyou could live without me. Even though thats a beautiful thing to sayand I loved hearing it. That is not true. You could live onbe with your daughterBen and Angela would be good for you, too. They would wholeheartedly help you, and let you lean on them when you needed someone, every step of the way. You know this. Youre stronger than you believe. You love me but you absolutely couldlivewithout me. I sighed. You know what I mean, Bella., I wanted to yell again, but didnt, I need you. Thats another thing I wanted to bring up., Bella said sadly, And something I want you to think about. What?, I felt a lump in my chest, this sounded serious. Do you thinkeven in the back of your mind, Bella asked, That maybejust maybeyou feel the way you feel about mebecauseof all the therapy? I have made you feel free, and healed you, youve said more than once, Ive helped you get to a good place in your life. Ive tried to take some guilt off your shoulders about your past. And, amazingly enough, some of the things Ive done with you have helped your peace of mind. You could be confusing what youre feeling with love Bella, thats absurd., I refused to consider this theory. I almost said thats stupid to her, but Im glad I didnt. She is not stupid, by any means. Shes right, she had worked her magic on me and made me feel better than Ive felt since foreverbut thats not why I love her. Its just one of the reasons I do. Charlie and Emmett and Jasper helped me too, but you dont see me on my knees to them, declaring my undying love., I pointed out. But, just think about it, Bella began but I cut her off again. Please dont analyze US, Bella!, I frowned, not liking this, You can analyze everything until it becomes NOTHING!! Ill let you break me down and theorize all night, but dont do that to US! There are no mental or scientific explanations for what we have, Bella. Pleasestoptearing us down. I love you. Period. Im proud of US. Im not hallucinating or transferring or dependant or any other term they might slap on me. I love you. Live with it. A long time went by but I refused to apologize this time. I am sorry., she said, with such love in her voice that I just wanted to kiss her forever. I waited then answered. You are forgiven. We will talk to my dad tomorrow., she said, agreeing, sounding a little unsure, We wont leave until he agrees to come with us. Really, Bella?, I felt and heard hope rising up inside me as I spoke. Really, Edward., she answered and before she could finish, I was holding her in my arms, resting on my knees in front of her throne like the goddess she is. I

didnt mind at all. She was loving me.holding mekissing mestroking my hair. I was hers. I would always be hersI wouldnt let her leave me. I couldnt. Even in death, I would never leave her. Charlie would see both of us. He would have to see that we couldnt be apart. I prayed for him to have mercy on me again, like he did when he saw my whip marks. I prayed for him to see US. And if that doesnt work, Ill chop off the other leg and drag him along behind us. Yes, Im kidding. Jeez, you all must think Im a psycho, too. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Dont analyze me. Im fine. Theres more, though, Edward., she said, snapping me out of my thoughts. She motioned me back to the sofaand I reluctantly returned there, sitting down. Alright. What? I asked, whatever was coming had to less terrifying than her first couple of announcements. Once we decidewhat were going to do, she made it sound so vague, When were movedwe need to find a good psychiatristfor both of us. Actually, for Katie, too. What?, I asked, hating the idea of sitting down with a stranger now, Youre my doctor. Im not a doctor yet, Edward., she said, You are the first person Ive ever tried to counsel. I have a lot more school ahead, wherever we go, before Im qualified to really help you. I wasnt supposed to help you, you know, my assignment was to talk to you, and observe you. We both are going to have some major issues in our lives. And Katie should see a child therapist, to help her deal with losing her mother and also, having you back in her life again. Its not just going to be all happy and sunny the moment were all together, you know. I know., I retorted defensively. Do you?, she asked, making me feel dumb now. Yes., I spat out, And what issues? I have to deal with what I did to Victoria., she said, right out, To pretend I never did it and move on will not work. If I really want to live and not let it eat me up inside, I have to discuss ittalk about it.analyze the hell out of it. I shouldve done it., I admitted, Im so sorry, Bella. I justcouldnt. It wouldve made fire. I couldnt even move when you picked up that candleeven afterI wouldve run ten miles before I stopped Shhh, shhhh, shhhhh!!!, she stopped me again, Im glad I did what I did. But like I said, I need to deal with it. I cant counsel myself. And eventually, if I did counsel you and Katie on my own, it would exhaust me. Im too close to you to be your doctor. It should be someone else. Someone you could go to and even complain about me if you needed to. Ill never complain., I vowed. She laughed a little.

Every couple has times when theyll drive each other nuts., she said, Its natural. Were gonna hate each other sometimes. Well argue, fight No!, I felt sick inside and she looked up at me with a strange gaze now. Im not going to fight with you., I stated, Ill never say cruel things to you. Issue., she raised a brow at me. Excuse me?, I felt irate now. Theres an issue, right there., Bella said smugly, I dont want you to be some puppy that never dares to argue with me, whos always agreeable, always giving into what I want. Its been your life for so long and I dont blame you. But thats a problem you have to work on. Come on, lets have a fake argument right now. Just try it. I didnt like this. No., I said, sulking like a kid. Come on, its not real., she said, I wont get mad at you. No, Bella., I refused. She calmed me down and now wanted to upset me again. Why? Edward, she leaned forward a little bit, Do you want us to have a healthy relationship or not? I looked at her, torn. I dont want to be your new Victoria., she said firmly, I want you to FEEL as free as you are. Come on. Ill start. I frowned and looked to the right as she began her little exercise. Edward, you know, she acted pissed off, I am getting so tired of cleaning up your stubble that you leave all over the bathroom! Dont you know how to wipe down the sink? My first thought was Im sorry, Bella, Ill clean it right now. But I knew thats not what she wanted. I decided to just play along, not meaning any of what I was about to say. Smirking, a plan in place, I obviously teased her with, Thats what I have YOU for, Bella. Cleaning is womens work. I smiled wide at her and she smiled back, knowing I was playing with her. Jerk., she muttered under her breath, Come on, Edward. Bella, Im very mean., I informed, When I fight. Trust me. Its nothing to do with Victoria. I dont fight anymore. I cant. You do fight., she argued, Sometimes, things will happen where you have to fight. What are you gonna do when Katie wants a belly ring? Whats gonna happen when a boy has her out late at night, two hours past her kurfew? I think the fear showed on my face because Bella smiled more at me. See?, she asked, loving how right she was, Come on. I can take it.

I didnt answer. Edward, I have to go to see a male patient of mine tonight. Hes a sex addict and he cant come to the office. Im going to his house at about eleven tonight to have a session with him., she said, waiting for me to argue. This isnt playing fair. She had her finger right on one of my biggest triggers. The hell you are., came out of my mouth. I stopped myself. I had said that calmly but very forbiddingly. I recognized my tone from when I used to fight with Tanya all the time. I hated it. This is my job, you cant stop me., she said, with attitude. I have handcuffs., I informed, still calm but dark, I CAN stop you. What are you saying?, she got louder now, Youre gonna handcuff me?! Who the hell do you think you are?! My MASTER?! My growl began to rise up inside me. I looked at Bella and she almost shrank back a bit. Im a doctor, Edward, not your slave!, she tried next, I can do whatever I want and I said Im going Youre my WIFE!, I stood, roaring the words at her, my fists clutched at my sides, my eyes on fire. She went back in her chair hard, her eyes afraid of me. I felt a gust of air escape from me and I backed away from her, sick to my stomach. Tears leaked out of the corners of my eyes and I fought to breathe. I cant, I breathed, the vision of her standing and coming to me, blurry through my wet eyes, I cant. Okay.its okay, she whispered to me, smoothing her hands up and down over my bare arms, Shhhh.shhhh.Im sorry. Im sorry. Its over. I kept thinkingI cantI cant have a relationshipnot a normal one, anyway. Bella is right. Id have a fight with her someday, just like this one, and Id snapand the fucking beast would be out. Worse, what if it were Katie? She will be a teenager someday, telling me the same things as Bella just said. Tanya always had work at night, at partiesI wondered if Bella said those things, knowing this was my big issue with my wife. Or maybe she just said it and got lucky. Even now, I wondered, did she mean we were over? Or the exercise was over? As a slave, I never got the chance to argue at all, about anything. I was an agreeable little puppy dog, and the beast in me was dormant for years. Why couldnt Bella be a Dominatrix? That would make it so much easier for me. I had frightened her. I saw it in her eyes.

This is why I dont fight., I explained as my breath kept panting, I felt panic all through my body, Im rotten, Bella. I tortured Tanya for years! I made her cry. Even my last words to her made her cry I broke away from her, undeserving of her understanding and touch. But I couldnt leave. I couldnt run out of her apartment. Remember what happened when I ran out on Tanya? I ran to the kitchen, leaning on the cool counter for support, my head hanging down as I studied the surface of it. Hey., she was back, stroking her hand up and down between my shoulder blades, Im here. Im with you. I love you. Thats not going to change. You dont have to hide your bad parts from me, Edward. To hide them is to let them live forever, deep inside, and always battle them. If you want to get rid of that guy who just screamed at meand not let Katie see him somedayand by the way, we DO want him gone. Then we have to take him out and give him his medicine. I know you think I enjoy doing these exercises with you, but theres a reason I push you like I do. And see, this is why someone besides me should be your doctor. Because you love me, you want to protect me and hide the darkest parts of yourself from me. But you cant do that. Not if you want peace., she finished, far, far too good for me. I sobbed, not able to hold it in anymore. And instead of shoving her away, I clung onto her again, holding her hand and getting an instant huge embrace from both her arms. I held on for dear life, without hurting her. Im sorry., I said over and over as she rocked me a little, both embarrassed and weak, I wish I wasnt like this. I wish I were better for you. This is why nice, good girls dont want me, to keep. I am so damaged. So weak. No wonder Victoria snapped me right up like she did. She could probably smell the pathetic all over me. You will be better, I swear., she held me tighter, kissing my shoulder, which was right near her mouth, I will be with youall the way. Partners, remember? I nodded, afraid if Id talk Id bawl again. I was trying to quiet myself, then another part of me thought, just let go, cry, forget your dignity. That part was quickly getting the upper hand. Partners., I choked out. Were both gonna have times that we need to lean on each other, said in my ear, Even carry each other. Thats alright. Dont be ashamed. I wish I could do that. Not be ashamed. Would that feeling ever go away? I decided it had to. I couldnt learn to live like this without Bella. I had to see Charlie tomorrow and convince him to come with us, to God knows where. More importantly, to give me a chance to be Bellas man, her partner. She had chosen me, despite all my flaws. He had to respect Bellas choice, even if he didnt respect me at all. I had one hell of a fight ahead of me. I couldnt cry and whimper like I was now. I couldnt be pathetic. Charlie would roll his eyes and hate me more.

I tried to steel myself inside, even as we tried to sleep, neither of us succeeding much. I would have to argue with Charlie. Id have to let that monster inside me out, even if only for a little while. But then Bella said to be calm, not to be angry when I talked to Charlie. I prayed for someone up there to help me tomorrowto show me the wayand find the words that would make Charlie understand. God was going to look down at me and raise a brow, asking if I hadnt asked for and gotten enough of his help recently. Maybe I was pushing my luck here. And I couldnt afford to piss Luck off right now, either. I closed my eyesand tried to sleep.

38 EPOV I couldnt wait to burst through the hospital room door. I didnt want to give off an enraged aura when I first met Charlies eye. I wanted him to hear me, calmly, and make a rational choice to let his daughter be an adult and choose her own path. I wanted her to choose me. I wanted him not to interfere. I wanted him out of the way. I also wanted him in Bellas life. I wanted things to work out, stupidly, I realized I wanted everything to fall neatly into place after Victorias demise. I truly didnt want anymore obstacles. And I knew that wasnt reality. But I want the fairy tale. I want to slide Bellas little foot into the glass slipper and have everything around us sparkle with pixie dust. Everyone around us would smile and embrace us, wish us well, and be at our Disney wedding at the castle. God, how I want that. I always thought, watching it with Katie, that is was an easy out, a too-perfect ending that wasnt facing any of their true life problems. But, again, I want the perfect ending. I dont want reality right now. I want Bella. And I was angry at Charlie for trying to steal that away from me. Hell, I hate fire for stealing Tanya from me. I cant even look at or light candles. Now I have a flesh and blood person to face and convince him to allow me to be happy. It would almost be, as if I were getting the chance to reason with the flames in my apartment that night. I had always hated that I had no control or chance to stop things from happening as they did that horrible night. Now I have a chance. I would not waste it. This time. Bella was quickly following me as my eyes took Charlie in. This is a man that saved my life. This is a man who created Bella. Not only in physical form, but mentally. Charlie had everything to do with the remarkable creature she is today. I dont want to disrespect that. Something in me said to slow down, to cut the anger in my gaze. So I softeneda bit. Hello Chief Swan., I heard myself greet him, respectfully. I noticed there were two pillows on top of the blankets of his bed, hiding the void that would be there. You are still Chief Swan to me. Im not trying to insult you, Charlie. Dont be mad. But Charlie did look annoyed that I had entered his room. I tried to ignore that.

Edward., he said dryly, crossing his arms and raising his eyes to the TV, as if a commercial about Smooth Away was more important than what Id have to say. Dad., Bella was on the other side of him, on his left. She sounded mad at his rude reply. What?, he growled darkly, only giving Bella his eyes, not me. Edward wants to talk to you., she snatched the remote and clicked the TV off, I want you to listen. Charlie huffed and I forgot everything I was going to say in that split second. I felt panicked all of a sudden, lost. Bella must have sensed that, always keen to emotions and painand always ready to put a tourniquet on my bleedingalways prepared to heal. So, heres what were going to do, DadEdward., she regarded both of us, This is a family therapy session. Everyone will get a chance to talkand everyone will listenDad. This is a brilliant idea! Why didnt I think of it? But then Charlie snorted and sighed, his arms still crossed in defiance. Hes not family, Bella., Charlie spat out, dismissing me with four words. But she was at my defense in two seconds. I love him, Dad, he IS family., she struck back with a hint of anger but kept it in check, as Dr. Bella always does, Now unfold your arms. Its a defense mechanism. It says no one will get inside you. I dont want to see that. And, like a miracle happenedCharlie uncrossed his arms and let them rest at his sides. Edwardsit down please., Bella took charge and I fell in love with her all over again. I sat down in a chair close to the bed and was glad Charlie was almost at eye level with me. Id hate to have to look up at him, in almost a kneeling level below him, and pleading with him to give us a chance. I had thought of begging him, last night, and knew it was the wrong way to get to Charlie. Hed think it was weak. I think its weak. But its all I know right now. I beg if I really want something. And sometimes, if I beg really well, I get it. I never want to have to beg again. Only Bella or my daughter would ever make me beg like a dog again. And if all else failed, I probably would do it, much to Bellas disapproval. Bella sat down as well, across from me, Charlies good and amputated leg between us, so symbolically. It might as well have been a million miles separating us. Dad, I talked to Edward last night, about what we talked about., Bella began, setting the stage, getting it all out there in the open. She has real courage, guts. She is so my super hero. I want lessons from her. Charlie sighed again. I felt my eyes burning when they darted to him. He turned his eyes to me, then, and they burned right back at me. This was going to be a battle. This was going to be war.

And Edward has some things to say, obviously., Bella continued, Im going to let him speak firstand then, Dad, youll get your chance to say whatever you want to say I felt my lips give her a little smile, and I hoped she noticed my silent thank you for this. We have to make a choice by the end of the nightabout our futures., Bella said, making me feel even more nervous, Its right that we spend today together, deciding things together. Charlie didnt say a word and a small silence descended upon us. Bella raised a brow to me and prompted me to begin with, Edward? Alright. Here it is. My chance to argue, to fight back, to say what I feel and think and not have to suffer any punishment because of it. And, just like that, the words came back to me. Chief Swan, I looked at him and spoke directly to him, I first want to thank you for everything. You had no reason to help me but you did. You put yourselfand your daughter into so much danger. It doesnt matter what the reason is, I am very grateful for everything you did. I am glad I said that first. I did want him to know how thankful I was for his help and for saving not only Bella and I but also Emmett. I got no reply yet from Charlie, not that I expected one. Its alright. I wasnt offendedyet. I am a father, too, Chief Swan., I said, cutting right into the heart of my message, Im not there every day with my daughter, butI love her every day. Im with her, in every breath I take. And I agree with you. Im not good enough for Bella. Edward!, Dr. Bella suddenly sounded like a sixteen year old girl that was mad at me for saying the wrong thing. But I wasnt finished yet. I even had Charlies attention now. He was looking at me, anyway. If I get to be around and some whore tried to take my daughter to the curb, let alone to a whole different state, Id murder him first. I would erase him from the world in two seconds., I said, without hesitation, then paused. Charlie even grinned a little. But then, I continued, Then my daughter would hate me. Curse me. Want no part of me at all. Id miss more time with her then, by her own choice. Id miss not just walking her down the aisle, or putting swing sets together for her kids in the backyard, but even little things like talking together, or cooking togetherjust calling on the phone to say hiwriting letters to each otherand a million other thingsId miss it all. I have missed far too much of her life already. I cant say a thing. I have to smile and even stand by, watching, while she grows up and makes her own choices. Even if those choices are wrong and will cause her pain, I cant say a damned thing. All I can do is be there when she needs me. Hold her while she cries and help her find the way. It sucks butI know in my heart thats the right thingthe only thing a Dad can do. Listen, Edward, you dont understand, Charlie tried to cut me off but I stopped him cold.

I understand, Charlie!, I closed my eyes for a moment. I was so tired of being treated like I was stupid and just a cute face and body, nothing more. I understand more than you do., I pointed out, staring daggers at him, Have you seen your daughter on fire? Have you been helpless, standing by while you listen to her screams of TERROR and excruciating PAIN?! I understand wanting to protect your little girl! Dont you dare try and tell me I dont get it. I DO! I paused again, calming down, my vision a little blurred with tears that threatened to leak out of my eyes, but I tried to hold them back. Bella was staring at me, her eyes strong but solemn. Calmly, I spoke again. I gave my daughter up once., I said very quietly, looking down at my hands that were clenched in fists, I wanted to keep her innocentI wanted her to be happy. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life, Chief Swan. It killed me. I died that day. But I did it for herfor Katie. I sold everything I was, hoping it would be enough to buy Katie her life back. And I would do it again. So if you want me to say Im sorry, I wont. I cant. What you see now is all thats left of me. I know its not a lot. I have no degrees, I have no real moneyI have no super career. I know Im a man in shreds, I know that. I didnt think I could even love another woman, after all the women Ive known in the last few years. But I do. I love Bella Swan. Ill do anything to make her happy. Evento rebuild myselfuntil I believe Im truly worthy of her, which I probably never will be. But Im gonna tryevery day. Please dontkill us before we even have a chance to begin. Please. I paused, thinking maybe I would end my speech here. Then Bella looked at me. I looked back at her, my eyes secretly adoring her. That took a lot of courage, Edward., Bella said in her professional doctor voice. Dad?, she began to give Charlie his chance to speak and he was about to open his mouth. But I cut in again. My parents once forbid me to marry Tanya., I dared to look at Charlies face as he stared back at me, They told me if I stayed with her, Id lose them, Id lose their money, my college courses, everything. I hated them for that. Not that I loved them very much before. But I chose love. I walked away from them and even though it was very painful for me and might have changed my relationship with her, I made the right choice. Dont make Bella choose, Chief Swan, please. It will hurt her. Either way. And youll never be the same man to her again. She looks on you as a hero. Dont throw that away. I stopped and let a breath out, adding, Thats all I wanted to say. Bella took another breath and smiled at me with approval. I felt much better now. The only thing that worried me was that it was Charlies turn to speak his mind. Okay., Bella said after another pause, Dadwhy dont you tell us what youre thinking? Bella sounded afraid, deep down, of what hed say next. So was I. I knew his reasons would be good and hard to dispute. All I have on my side is love. He has logic, sense, and reality behind him, ready to cut my throat.

Fine., Charlie began, his voice low and unmoved. I am dead. But just as Charlie was about to start ripping me apart, the door burst open and two officers with guns on their hips strode in. A man, in his thirties, with short brown hair slicked back wearing a modest suit, and a woman in her twenties with short cropped reddish blonde hair and fair skin. They showed their badges and looked grim. Federal marshals Conner and Meyer., the man announced themselves, Sorry to intrude, here, but were out of time. Out of time? Bella stood up, looking worried as they stood beside Charlies bed, next to me. The woman looked down at me and put a hand on my shoulder. I felt sick inside suddenly, imagining the worst. Katie! My eyes widened in realization and I jerked my head up at them. My daughter!, was all I could shout out. Shes okay, shes okay., the woman marshal assured me and my guts unclenched. But somethings happened., the male marshal but in, Ben Cheney, your daughters guardianhis car blew up last night. This is the car they left behind when we took them to the safe house. No one was hurt butwell, I dont have to paint you a picture, do I? I felt myself jumping up and moving before my brain was even aware of it all. We have a place set up for you to join them.., the woman marshal was telling me, But we need to go now. Alright, Im coming., I said, ready to go with them right now. I didnt even really need to go back to Bellas to get anything. Everything that was important to me was on me right now in the backpack I was carrying. We can go right to the airport and be on our way to Katie. I could see her in hours. Edward?, Bellas voice snapped me out of my thoughts and I froze, turning and looking. Bella was standing next to Charlies bed, and he was holding her hand. They were both looking at me, both their faces painted with dread. Bella, I choked. The male marshal looked at his partner and they waited by the door. I hate to get in the way ofthis, the male marshal said, breaking the silence that had risen up between us, But we have to go. Its yes or no. Bella, I have to go., I informed, If I dont, Ill never see my daughter again. I looked at the marshals and raised a brow. Right?, I asked them, making sure.

They signed up for witness protection this morning., the woman gave a serious nod. I turned to Bella and she had tears in her eyes. Please, Bella., I took a step forward, Charlies bed between us. Then I looked at Charlie and so did she. Chief Swan, I breathed, Please come with us. Please dont do this to us. If you want me to beg, Ill beg. Ill do anything you want. But please dont take Bella away from me. My God., Charlie grumbled, embarrassed by my plea. Dad!, Bella frowned at him. Sorry., he said quietly, looking down at the pillows hiding his amputated leg, Im not going. I let out a frustrated breath and looked away, then my eyes came back to Bella. I cant ask you to come with me and leave your father, Bella., I said and every single word cut into my heart as I uttered it. Wait., Bella let a tear fall and she grabbed my good arm, yanking me over into the corner of the room, near the window, leaving Charlie and the marshals there alone. Before she even started to speak, I crushed my lips to hers and cupped her face into my hands, afraid this may be my last chance to kiss her sweet, wet lips. Edward, she cried, her voice trembling as she threw herself into my arms. I held her close and tight, kissing the top of her head with small, gentle pecks. Bella, I said with a small voice, I understand. Hes your father. Just like I know you understand I need to be with my daughter. I wont make you choose. I dont want you hating me for this. Edward, I love you., she clung to my shirt, a whimper coming out of her throat, I cant let you go. I love you, too, Bella., I heard my voice crack, realizing if I did leave, I would never be able to see her or even call her again. This witness protection thing is for life. But then I pictured Bens car exploding, with all of them inside. If they had taken Bens car instead of Angelas a couple days agotheyd all be dead now. Ill always love you., I added, meaning every word of it, ignoring my shaking hands. She sobbed out loud and I glanced back at Charlie. He was avoiding looking at us, flicking on the TV overhead. In that moment, I hated him. He didnt even care that his daughter was crying and in pain. I broke from Bella and went after Charlie, snatching the remote from his hand.

Yea, thats right, watch TV, CHARLIE!!, I shouted right into his face, Whats the score of the game?! Our lives are fucking destroyed and you turn on the TV?!! I wonder if theres a show called Tearing your Daughters Heart Out!!! Bella came up behind me and was tugging on my sore arm a little but I didnt care. I had lost all control. You know, Charlie, Im sorry you lost your leg, but Im more sorry that you lost your heart a long time ago., I was livid, Theres no prosthetic for that! I hope you have no trouble sleeping at night for the rest of your life, knowing your daughter gave up her own happiness to push you around in your wheelchair for the rest of yours! Edward, enough!, Bella pulled me away from him and I threw the remote at him as she got me over near the door, the marshals right beside us. Im sorry but we need to go., the woman said to both of us, then looked at Bella, asking, Are you coming? I didnt need to hear her answer. I just took her into my arms again and kissed her, filled with passion and fire, my anger still fueling the flames. She kissed me back but then sobbed again, breaking the kiss. I placed three little kisses to her mouth after that, wanting every second I could get with her. Oh God, Edward, she wept, grabbing her hair. She looked up at me with glistening eyes and took a breath. She brought both hands to my hair, touching it, stroking it, memorizing its every unruly lock. Then she moved her fingers down to my forehead, over my closed eyes, down the slope of my nose, down my cheekbones, her thumbs gliding over my bottom lip, then playing at the little dent in my chin. She looked into my eyes as I stared back, my nose resting and nuzzling hers. I tried to think of something to say, in hopes of easing this pain. I knew immediately nothing could. This doesnt change anything, Bella Swan., I whispered, I love you. Ill always love you. And Ill always belong to you. Always. Ill always belong to you, Edward., she cried, placing two kisses on my neck, I love you so much. Edward?, the male marshal called as I turned my head to him. We have to go., he looked at his watch, then looked down, adding, Sorry. I have to go. I said blankly, feeling so empty inside now. Promise me youll stay in therapy., she clung onto me, tears all over her little face. I smiled and moved my thumbs under her eyes, moving the wet, salty tears aside. I promise., I said, honestly, Dr. Bella. I prefer Notebook Girl., she tried to smile back up at me. Yes, my notebook girl., I grinnedand felt tears come to my eyes.

I had to go fast or Id never go. I hated it but I had to get out of here. You saved me, Bella., I choked out the words, You reached me. I told you I could., she looked up at me, proudly. I felt tears about to fall out of my eyes and I lifted her face to mine, one last kiss. I took my time, hoping it was as sweet and precious and everlasting to her as it was to me. My heart was shattered when I ended the kiss at last. Goodbye Bella., I whispered, yanking myself out of her arms and turning, taking a couple steps until I was outside the hospital door, the marshals right beside me. And before I knew it, we were leaving her behind. We were on the way to the exit of the hospitalon the way out of her life forever.

39 BPOV Goodbye Bella., he whispered, quickly pulling himself out of my arms, turning and exiting the door out without looking back. To another woman it might have seemed as if he couldnt wait to leave me. But Im Dr. Bella. I know better. A fast break is easier. Im sure the day he gave Katie to Ben and Angela he didnt linger long there either. He was rushing off to suffer alone, like he always did. I had broken him all over againjust when he seemed to become so strongso proud. And now I am broken, too. His scent still danced around me as I tried to hold in the sobs that were dieing to erupt. Stupid little things began to dawn on me likeI have no pictures of him. But I do have his beautiful, sweet voice on tape. I do have that. I pictured myself laying in my bedroom in Forks, listening to those tapes over and over again, holding my pillow over my mouth so Charlie, next door wouldnt hear me bawling. Then I pictured myself using the rain stick Edward gave me to smash my fathers head in while he slept. That thought gave me a bit of perverse pleasure. I felt dizzy and didnt realize I was making any sounds until I heard Charlie talking to me, trying to ease me by saying something like Come here, Bells, pleasetake it easy, hon. All I could understand, after my legs numbly made their way over to him, were my wordsI kept repeating the same two words over and over again, almost to myself. Hes gonehes gone, I breathed again as Charlie took my hand into his and gave it a furry little kiss, his mustache tickling my skin. Then a sob did come out and the tears were blinding me. All I could see was Edward. A thousand beautiful little pictures dancing around in my heartstarting with a trapped, collared vampire being dragged onto the club floorto a laughing man in a Chinese restaurant, wiping the coke I had spit at him off his shirtto my

nude, masculine hunter that made love to me in the woodsto the heartbroken look on his face a moment ago when he realized we had to go in separate directionsforever. Bella., Charlies voice was suddenly firm and kinda snapped me out of my transe, Bella? Yea, Dad?, I stopped my breakdown and shoved it aside for now, even though part of me knew he deserved to see what hed done by his stubborn ass attitude. Maybe he was in painbut was he in as much pain as me? Do you need some painkiller or something?, I heard myself blurt out, wishing there were some shot to heal my agony right now. Ill never even get to know if hes alright, if things with Katie will be alrightif his therapy worked out for him and his familyhis heart. Would he ever be able to find lovereal love with a woman? After all the abuse his poor heart has endured? No, Bella., Charlie answered, the TV blissfully off now. I sniffed, trying to hide my hurt as Charlie began talking, holding both my hands in his rough ones. Remember when you were little, Bella?, Charlie cracked a little smile and I felt my own face frowning at him in response. Is this really happening? I lost Edward forever a minute ago and now Charlie wants to walk down memory lane with a smile on his face!! Maybe if I strangle him now I have time to catch Edward before he leaves the hospital. What?, my voice sounded so tiny and weak. Is this really what I gave up my first and only love for? Someone I can reminisce with about my crappy childhood? I almost want to go find James and beg him to finish me off. Remember when I bought you home The Little Mermaid?, he asked, his eyes looking a little spacey, as if he were really seeing it now. I just staredmaybe hes on something really heavy right now. Remember?, he looked at me directly now, his eyes more serious and not so nostalgic anymore. I shrugged. Yea, I guess. I have to ask the doctors if he sustained any brain damage when he took that fall. Jesus, thats all I need in addition to all the rest of the crap now piled on my shoulders. It felt like buildings upon buildings were wobbling on my back. And all this weight, without a glimmer of hope or happiness in my heart.was just too painful. I wondered how many years Id be able to do this. If there was any way I could counsel myself and live with this jail sentence Id just imposed upon myself. And I felt guilty for even thinking that. This is my father. I should take care of him. He saved Edward. Maybe thats how I can live with this.

Charlie saved Edward. I owed him for that. And I would pay the pricewith the rest of my life. I knew in my heart I loved Charlie. He was there for me all my life. But right now, I could feel no love at all for him. And that scared me. I felt more like a dutiful slave now than a daughter. A slaveholy shit. I had just traded places with Edward. I am now Charlies slave and Edward is free. How strange that only one of us at a time can be free. My free time was upand over. Maybe thats what I get for exterminating Victoria. But Im still not sorry about that. Killing her was the same as killing roaches to me. Edward had set me free from all my fears and hang ups, he really did awaken me, the woman I became with him was someone I really liked. She had no guilt about her pleasures, her lovesshe was brave and natural...sexual. I loved being her. Now Id have to put all that away in storage and be the boring, closed up thing I was before he came into my life, dancing his way into my heart. I felt something inside me accept that. I would gladly take his place, I knew that a long time ago. If it wouldve spared Edward all he sufferedall he lostId do it in a second. Fly, Edwardfly.dont look backjust keep risinggo. Ill stay here on the ground and watch you soar until you disappear in the sunlight youve craved for so long. Be happy, my sweet lovemy noble vampiremy angelmy Free Eaglemy Thumper. Ill miss you forever and ever. Ill never stop loving youEdward Cullen. I pictured myself a dried up old woman by the time my thirties came around. I wouldnt even want to date, and Id never let myself forget how wonderful every moment with Edward had been. Id be tortured by remembering such deep lovebut never being able to feel it again. I dont want anyone else. If some perfect guy ever did show up in my lifeI dont even think Id notice him at all. And Charlie was still talking. You loved that movie so much., Charlie smiled, remembering, Id sit with you on the floor and wed watch it over and over again. As soon as it was over and the song ended, youd jump up and hit rewind. And youd jump around, not hardly able to wait until it rewound so it could play again. I blinked and looked towards the windowimagining Edwards plane flying pasttaking him out of my life. I want to sit on the floor and watch Sponge Bob with himright now. I liked it, too., Charlie said and my mind was blurring his words a little, Ariels Dad had it rough. Trying to keep his little girl safethinking the guy she wanted wasnt good enoughbut then he proved himselfhelped save the oceanand the Kingeveryone. Good, Dad. Im glad you enjoyed it, too. And he had it in his power to turn her humanbut he knew if he did that, hed lose her forevershed marry the prince and her dream would come truedamneven now I remember getting real tears in my eyes at the end when he says to the crabthe part abouttheres only one problem lefthow much Im going to miss her. Got me every time. And then he gives her legsgives her the

chance to be happy. He lets her gosmilingeven though its gotta be killing him inside. Huh?, I was in so much pain now it made me stupid. He cleared his throat and swallowedand his eyes shined with small tears. He squeezed my hands, kissed themand then let them go. I used to think to myselfId do the same thingif I were him., Charlie said with a defeated, almost ashamed voice, Damn it. He paused again, and then looked up at me while I just frowned down upon him, confusedin shock. Goodbye Bella., he choked on the words, letting a sharp breath out, Tell Edward hed better take DAMN good care of my girl. Ill find him if he doesnt, no matter where theyre planning on hiding ya. What?!! I froze and my mouth fell open. If this was some sick joke, Id kill him myself. WHAT?!!, I heard myself shout, shaking all over. Id love to take an hour to say it all but your boy is getting away., Charlie glanced at the hospital door, Go get him, Bella. Im sorry, I was fucking wrong. Theres a first time for everything, I guess. But, Dad, I cant just leave---, I wanted to goso badly.but now that Charlie was my Dad again, the Dad I knewhow could I leave him this way? Now? Move it, girl!, Charlie raised his voice a tad, Hes got a couple minutes head start on you. Do whatever you have to do catch them. You remember me teaching you how to drive after a suspect, right? Yea., I remembered. Charlie taught me all he knew. He was still teaching me. So move your ass, Swan., he jerked his head to the door, NOW! If you dont catch him, Im gonna be pretty disgusted with you. I breathed and tears fell from both my eyes. Charlie Swan is my hero. There was only one thing I could say now. I flung myself into his arms and whimpered, I love you, Daddy. God, I can see Ariel in her wedding dress doing and saying the same thing to King Triton. I love you, Little Bells., his voice broke as he called me my three year old nickname. His one arm wrapped around me and his hand rubbed up and down my backand then he released me. Now get outta here., he said gruffly, Theyd be headed to JFK airport. Take the quickest route. Cut off anything that dares to get in your way. No more bullshit nowGO. Okay., I jerked backwards, coming back to place a big wet kiss on Charlies face, Thank you Dad. Bye., he raised a hand as I took one last look, busting out of the hospital door.

The two policemen outside Charlies door looked at me for a moment, wondering why I was running. I spun around, facing them and ordered them in no uncertain terms. Take care of that man, I mean it!, I pointed at them, not even waiting for their reactions before I spun again, my sneakers squeaking on the floor as I sped out of theresome nurse yelling at me not to run through the halls as I ignored her. I was on the street nowmy mind going through my options. My truck was home. Edward had driven us here in his Volvo. I raced to it in the parking lot and realized before I got to it, that he still had the keys. I had driven this car once before, when I rescued Edward from Ravens place. One thing my Dad taught me was driving like a cop. But how to get into the car without a key? My father taught me this awhile ago, in case of emergencies. I never thought Id have to use it for real. But I can open Edwards car lock with my cell phone. I flipped it open and went to the menu, going to soundshitting the one Charlie had me name Renee. I hit the ringtone and held it up to Edwards lock. It just made a little hum sound and the lock clicked open. How cool is that? Thanks again, Charlie! My father knew all kinds of great little tricks like that and he shared them all with me, just in case I ever needed any of these tips in an emergency situation. So many times hed hear stories of girls who might have gotten away, if they had the guys car key, or something like that. He never wanted me helpless and unprepared, unable to do all she could to escape. Sorry, Edward., I was in his car seat and moved the wheel all the way up so I could reach down under and pull the gold and green wires out. Hopefully hed never know I had to do this to his baby. Maybe on our 25th anniversary Id tell himmaybe. I was flying out of the parking lot and prayed to God that no cops would snag me. Would I stop? No. I had to catch upI was way behind them. I had to haul ass. Good thing I have a Volvo under my ass. Please, please, please, I was driving like a maniac, swerving around cars and trying to dial my cell phone at the same time. If I could call him, I could stop him. But I kept getting Edwards voice mail. Did they take his phone away from him? Maybe that was part of being in the witness protection programcutting all ties to the witness. DAMN IT!!, I threw the cell phone in the empty passenger seat next to me, giving up on that idea. I was honking and screeching around slow traffic, wondering why no sirens were behind me yet as I bolted through the narrow streets like lightning. I glanced at my speed. 83 miles per hour. I was glad at least it was a weekday and the afternoon, not lots of traffic in my way right now. In the back of my head, I wondered how Id even find Edward to stop him. I had no idea where he was going, what airline he would be usingwhat gatepart of me considered giving upthis was impossible!! It would never work! Only in the

movies was it ever so easy! But I couldnt give up. Edward is my life now. I have to try and save it. To go back to Forks nowafter this chance of going after himit would cause me physical pain. It would break me. It would make me a shadow. Please Mom, pleaseI mentally beggedstop himdont let him get awayhelp me find him. I talk to my mother all the time, in my head, just about my little every day thingsshe knows how much I love Edward. She mightve been the one to straighten Charlie out just now. I hope she is still with me, fighting on my side. No, no NO!!, I was coming upon a busy street, filled with cars. Bumper to bumpernowhere to go I felt tears come to my eyes as I looked at Edwards digital clock on the dashboard. How many minutes had I been driving? He could be at the airport right now, escorted by federal marshals, passing all the traffic if they wished. I clenched my eyes and whimpered, shakingand then a loud, blaring siren sounded in the distanceI spun around, lookinghearing it approachingcoming closercloser nowall the cars were moving asidepulling over to clear the road Are you kidding me? In my rear view mirror, I saw a giant, red, gorgeous fire engine!! Lights flashingsirens squealingthe symbolism almost knocked the wind out of me. The road was clear and the fire engine breezed right down the street. I didnt hesitateI roared after itbefore any cars could pull back into trafficI could follow the fire engine as long as it was headed the way I wanted to go. It would cut through streets with no resistance like a hot knife through butterand I would be sitting right on its coattails. How many laws am I breaking again? I was very happy for a couple minutes, smiling at the confused faces of a couple of firefighters on the back of the truck. Maybe they thought I was a volunteer firefighter or something. I certainly didnt look the part, but I didnt worry about that now. I just thanked God or my mom or whoever for this break and took advantage of it for all it was worth. This is too good to be trueIm almost there! What Id do when I got there was going to be fun. The fire engine turned left finallyand I had to turn right. Oh well, thank you, fire engine!! You ROCK!! And thenmy heart stopped. Cars were bumper to bumperfor miles!! The line seemed to stretch out ahead of me for light years!! I turned and fumbled around for my cell phone again, hoping to try that again, my confidence dwindling with super speed. Something was holding traffic up big time. Was there an accident? I couldnt see anything. I jerked my arm, not finding my phone anywhere on the floor by the passenger seat. My purse spilled over and a few things fell out. I didnt pay any attention to

that until my head spun around, about to feel under the seat for my phonebut then something caught my eye. A little sliver of paper with red writing on it. A fortune. The one you love is closer than you think. Where? Where?, I whimpered aloud to myself, searching everywhere I could look from my dormant vehicle. I couldnt sit still like this anymore. It was killing me. I went with my gut and opened the door, getting out of the car, slamming the door closed. A couple people honked at me but I ignored it. I scanned the inside of every car I walked past, looking for my Edward. EDWARD!!, I started screaming his name in a loud bellow, EDWARD CULLEN!! Maybe this isnt a great idea, calling someones full name in the street when theyre on their way to join witness protection. I dont even know what kind of car the marshals drove. Everything is against me here. I was yelling so loud I didnt even hear it until about five minutes later. Drumsloud, booming drumslike thunder. Chanting voicesmaleIndian!! It was a slow, deep chantit sounded like Indian warriors on their way to heavenor the spirit road, as they call it. It was so loud Im sure no one could hear me at all. But I was quiet nowI ran towards the voicesunsure whyit just felt right. Maybe they were having the festival on the road crossing this one and they were blocking traffic or something. I ran my ass offI had to get there. This has to be rightthis has to be the way. Please let this be. They had told me my voice was good, that it had medicine. They told Edward he would be free. And by some unreal coincidence, they were here now, blocking trafficthe traffic that threatened to remove Edward from my world. God, another Disney flashback. Now Im Pocahontas, racing to save our futures, our two worldsto make them onefinallyone. I dont know how I did it, but I somehow got to them. I choked for another minuteout of breathsweating like a pig. A couple of the men in their twenties, dressed in their beautiful ceremony headdress and costumes, were nice enough to steady me and wait for me to calm myself down. Are you alright?, one of them smiled at me, waiting patiently. I need your help., I panted, my hands on my knees, bent forward as I tried to control my breathing, PleaseIm desperate! A few moments later, traffic had still not moved an inchand I had thirty loud, strong Indian warriors voices calling, FREED EAGLE!! FREED EAGLE!! And they were blowing their horns, like Indians from days past.

This was while they broke into little teams and spread themselves out amongst the trapped cars. I nearly sobbed from the emotion I felt at these wonderful men who helped me instantly, not asking me lots of questions. All they knew was that love was on the line. I had lost him and they would help me find him. It was enough for them. I didnt want to call his name out, just in case there was anyone in the area who would want to hurt him. Freed Eagle would work. I remember the look on his face when theyd named him that. I think that truly is his real name nowin his heart. I kept searching every car I walked past, looking for my bronze haired beauty. I would give anything to see that hair again. Edward!!, I tried to keep my voice from becoming a scream, Edward!! I could hear the calls for Freed Eagle even now, way back here as they walked way up ahead of me. Their voices rose up and boomed like a gods wouldand I felt hope budding again deep inside me. He has to be around here somewherehe had to hear his name. I wiped my eyes and kept movinghoping the next car would be the onethen the nextand the next. This would be perfect, to find him before he got to the airport. Once there, I would never find him. Please, Edwardjust answer, I cried to myself like a four year old girl. Maybe he didnt get stuck in this traffic. Maybe theyd taken another road. Then I heard a chorus of high pitched Indian warrior voices, celebrating something. My heart burst in my chest as I looked up ahead from where the sounds were coming. I felt a big gush of wind blow my hair back away from my face, wiping my tears. Did they find him? Was it just other people participating in the festival? I heard lots of honkingcars sounding angry as they barked out loud. I heard thuds against metaland drums pounding in a happy tunewarriors doing a war crysounding pleasedvictorious. Then I heardBella!! Am I losing my mind? Or did I really hear that? The Indians dont know my name. BELLA!!, a male voice roared out again, more intense. I couldnt see anythingjust cars. I heard fast thuds against metal again and realized it was footstepswalking oncars? I found myself climbing on top of this poor guys beat up old Buick, a faded blue thing. His shouts and his honks would not disturb me. I was listening for my name againsearching for my warrior prince. BELLA!! I finally heard it again and turned towards it. Everything paused and came to a crashing halt then.

All standing on top of trapped cars that were filling the skinny street, there were five Indian warriors.and in the center of them like a sore thumb stuck out a pale white skinned one with bronzish colored hair, wearing t-shirt, jeans, and sneakersand of course, his bear claw around his neckand the biggest smile Id ever seen. This was a new smile of his I never saw before. It melted me in a half second. Is this your Freed Eagle?, one of the more handsome Indian warriors smiled, at Edwards side. EDWARD!!, I squealed, climbing over a couple more cars as he did the same to reach me. Bella!, I was in his arms finally and was being drowned in his lips, kisses soft but getting more and more intense as he tried to talk between each one. I guess so., another warriors voice said to my left. They sounded genuinely happy for us and if I had time, I wouldve kissed every single one of those guys. But at the moment, I only had kisses for my Edward. What are you doing?, his brow creased as I opened my mouth and kissed him harder, my fingers clutching into the sides of his hair, Whats going on? Did he still not realize that I cant live without him? Doesnt he know this means Ill never leave him again? I heard the marshals shouting a few cars behind us as we both stood on some poor guys hood. The honking didnt bother me at all. We just kept kissing. Nothing could move us now. I want to go with you, Edward., I pleaded, kissing him even rougher than before, If you want me to. Please say you want me to. He smiled before I kissed him againand he closed his eyes during this kiss. I held his face so he couldnt get away from me. God, I want you to, Bella., he breathed, kissing me this time, How I want youI love you, I love you so much! I leaped into his arms, holding him as the Indian warriors and a bunch of spectators in their cars began clapping and honking little tunes, celebrating right along with us. Only in New York I love you., I whispered into his ear before I kissed it, letting happy tears blink out of my eyes. His hands were like heavenly skin touching my backthen my ribs. I can never lose these hands again. I was dieing more every step I took., Edward breathed into my ear now, We cant be apart, Bella. We just cant. I know, I know, I know., I whimpered like a little girl, kissing him again, this time a little softer. What about Charlie?, he asked now, bringing reality back into our little bubble. He told me to go get you., I smiled with a touch of sadness in my voice, He told me to tell you- you better take damn good care of his girl. I will, I swear!, he promised, his arms crushing around my waist. And I knew he meant it, all the way down to his bones, I SWEAR!

I know you will., I looked into those dazzling emerald eyes of his, And Ill take care of you. Well both take care of Katiewe can do this. With a determined nod, Edward smiled that lovely crooked smile of his, his eyes full of hope and strength again. We WILL do it., he replied, the bravery glowing around him, Together. Yes, Edward., I used his trademark servant phrase, Yes. Yes., he agreed, kissing me again, with a new energy that said we would make it noweverything would be alright. It would take work and pain and struggle, lots of itbut I was ready for it. I once thought it would be impossiblebut nowI feel like anything with him is reachablewe can get there. I know we have love on our side but I also know that it takes more than love to last in this world. But we do have more. I began to list all the other things we have going for us when we were interrupted. Cullen., the male marshal was standing on the car behind us, along with his partner. They were just frowning at us, waiting. Edward and I turned to them, remembering. This is not what we call hiding you., the female one squinted her eyes. Oh. Sorry., Edward cringed a little. She coming with us, I assume?, the male asked dryly. Yes., Edward squeezed my waist and turned us towards the marshals. But we didnt even get a chance to start walking off the car when a giant, exploding BOOM sound erupted all the way down at the end of the long line of cars. Everyone started screaming and jumping out of their cars. I couldnt see well but I saw black smoke and it was in the direction I had come from when I left the Volvo. The marshals grabbed us and jerked us away, shoving us into the back seat of their car. They were in the front seat, wheels squealing as we took off, tearing down the road. What the hell was THAT?, Edward peeked out the back window as I did the same beside him. The male marshal was on his cell, yelling as his partner stared at him. Were nearly there now., he shouted, We also have Bella Swan with us now, too. Yes! Print it! He snapped his phone shut and looked at the woman at his side. It was the Volvo!, the man yelled and looked at me in the rear view mirror, Did you drive his Volvo here? Yea., I admitted. Great., he grumbled, Youre lucky to be alive, you know that? What?, I asked, What happened? His Volvo just exploded., the male marshal informed, still driving at the speed of light.

My Volvo!, Edwards head spun back around, looking out the windshield again, as if he just lost his puppy. Oh shit. Im dead. Maybe I proclaimed our undying love a little too soon. Please dont let him be mad at me. Forget the car, your girl drove it over here!, the woman turned to us, looking at Edward, It mustve been on a timer. We had someone on the way to check the car out but you mustve beat him there. Oh my God!, Edward breathed and looked at me, Thank God you got out of the car! Jesus. That fortune saved my life! How wild is that? Is this always the way you guys take care of people?, I heard myself scolding them, wishing my father was in charge of this operation instead of these guys. Hey!, the woman frowned, Youre alive, were doing our job. Now shut up until we get there. Hey, dont you talk to Bella that way! Who the HELL do you think you are?!, Edward defended me with no hesitation. I felt so proud of him. Hes already standing up for us, and against a woman. He is going to be fine. Hes a fast healer. The good thing is no one else got hurt., the man said, People near your car got out of their vehicles to see the show. Well, they thought it was a show, with the Indians and all. That was very lucky. Luck is still on our side. Thank you! Yea., Edwards mouth hung open, thinking of what couldve happened. And, the woman added, It can work out for us. Were gonna leak it to the press that the Volvo exploded and claimed the lives of Edward Cullen and Bella Swan. Youre dead. And that means youre safe. No one will come looking for you. Oh God., I felt my stomach tighten. Edward looked at me, solemnly. My Dad, I said in a little voice, Hell think Or maybe hed be smart enough to realize it was a trick to keep our enemies away from us. If not, hed think he let me go and then we both got killed because of it. Hed blame himself for my death. Hed hate Edward for getting me killed along with himself. Please, Dad, figure it out. Dont believe Im dead. Know that Im going to be happy somewhere. I know., Edward said, his voice just as small as mine as he held my hand, Joseph and KatherineEmmett I hate thisI really hate this, I complained, almost to myself. Im so sorry, Bella., his eyes softened and gazed into mine, If youd never met me, this wouldnt have happened Hey., I jerked on his hand, looking right back at him, Id rather be dead nowthan to have lived a thousand years and not know you. So shut up.

He managed a little smile then as I leaned into his arms, knowing I could find some peace in those arms. They were so good at holding me and melting away my sadness and fears. Yes, Volvo killer., he teased as I pinched his nipple through his t-shirt, making him yelp out and yank away for a second. Alright, enough back there., the man scowled at us, Were here. Lets hope they check our plane for explosives., Edward grumbled under his breath to me as we parked and got out of the car, the marshals coming with us. Sitting in the plane, all we knew was Wyoming. Edward had peeked and saw it written on the tickets the female had picked up at the ticketing counter. He had whispered this information to me as our marshals sat in the seats across from us, facing us. I let Edward have the window seat. I was okay with flying, but the takeoffI absolutely hated. What do I know about Wyoming? Not much. I whispered into Edwards ear. Is it nice there?, I asked, as if Id care, as long as we were all together, and hed have Katie. He smiled and glanced at the marshals, then whispered back. Ive heard its nice. Mountains and lots of wildlife. People go there a lot to camp in the woods., he informed. I smiled back at him, letting it tell him what I truly felt. That doesnt sound so terrible. Actually, it sounds wonderful. I thought back to my first thought about being in a relationship with him, and how we had mountains in our way. It made me chuckle to myself that wed be surrounded by mountains now. After I nearly crushed Edwards hand while we took off, we were in the air and the marshals loosened up a bit. They informed us where we were headed and said theyd tell us more once we were there. I didnt realize it but they would also be assigning us jobs to further hide us. I wondered if I could still attend college now but I decided to wait to ask that later. I laid back in my seat, just finding comfort in the quiet ride of the airplaneand that Edwards hand was holding mine. I turned to him and opened my eyesand he was laying back in his seat, staring back at me, as if studying me. What?, I got concerned right away. Are you afraid?, he asked with a deep voice. Yes., I had to be honest, You? Yes., he told the truth too and I was so glad. But Im not sorry., I brought his hand to my lips and gave it a gentle kiss, Ill never be sorry, Edward Cullen. Love you. Love YOU., he grinned back, kissing my knuckles now. I remembered when Edward had taken my check for twenty thousand, promising I wouldnt be sorry. He was so right.

He smiled and asked, What do you desire, notebook girl? I blushed fully. This is the first thing he asked me, inside his vampire cage. And all the seduction and fire was still there in his sexy voice. I guess hed always be a flirtand I was okay with thatas long as he flirted with me and no one else. He gave a little laugh, getting the same blush from me as Im sure he got out of me that first night. Dont be afraid., he repeated his words to me from that night, his finger playing around my jawbone, I wont bitemuch. He moved my face aside with his finger and opened his mouth, coming towards my jugular vein with those lips. Wait, no.., I put a hand to the base of his neck as he halted, Can I justkiss you? He smiled darkly at me. Where would you like it? Everywhere., I changed my original answer and surprised him. Before I had said on my lips, on my mouth! I was so afraid of him. But yet I knew I needed him even then. He smiled and leaned towards me again. But for now, how about right here?, I pointed at my lips. An honor., he replied, as sweetly as he did that first nightand he kissed medeep and so well that my toes tingled when he was finished. He sighed and grinned at me, looking a little dizzy. How was that? he asked for my approval, as he did that night. I sighed in response, staring into those two divine green orbs slightly above me. Your eyes are so pretty., I stole that from my conversation with him in the awaken room. Well, thank you., he took my face into his hands, ready to kiss me again, coming closer, and adding, Its not often I get compliments on my eyes. I appreciate that. His eyes are magical. Im not afraid anymore.

40 EPOV I laid my head back and closed my eyes and for once I didnt see Victoriaor Kevinor even Bella. There was just blacknessand peace. I liked it. I felt my lips smile as I enjoyed a true sensation of nothingness. There was no need to think right now. No worry, no fear, no sadness or anxiety. Nothing. I was enjoying it immensely and Bella was sweet enough to let me be, maybe looking out her windowmaybe wondering what her life would become in Wyoming.

Then some whore part of me that still existed came up with the idea of taking Bella into the tiny bathroom at the end of the row and induct her into the mile high club. I frowned slightly at myself. How gross. Would I ever leave this part of me behind? Would it always be there, like a scar that would always remind me of what I waswhat I could never escape? I am on my way to a clean placea good placewhere my daughter and Tanyas parents are waiting for me to finally rejoin their familyand bring Bella into it. And I have bathroom sex on my mind. I shoved the image out of my headof Bella sitting on the silver metal sink, her legs spread open as far as she could manage it in the narrow room, and me buried deep inside her, clutching her ass, thrusting and drowning her moans with my open mouth that took her lips captive into mine. Now that I see that imageits not that disgusting. Its kinda hot, actually. But no, not this trip. Its not right. Bella is right. I am going to need a doctor, someone I could tell these things to, with no fear of Bella hearing some of the sick things that roll around in my brain. Maybe it will be easier to tell these things to someone I have no emotional bond with. Someone I wont have to fear will look at me differently and recoil from me when it all got to be too much to bear. I do hold back a lot with Bella, afraid shell see me for what I am. I cant do that anymore. I have to change. And then Im afraid to change. Bella fell in love with me as I am now, why I have no idea, but she did. If I change, maybe she wont love who I change into. So much for enjoying the darkness and nothingness. It never lasts very long, those little moments of blankness. I opened my eyes and glanced past the marshals across from me, to find Bella at my right side, staring out at the earth far below us. I always love looking at things from this high up, as the plane readies to land. Everything looks so miniature, like a model someone built. Tiny little dots, cars, driving down the thin little line thats a highway. Little houses, lakes, mountains, grass, fields. This doesnt look like New York, thats for sure. It wasnt cluttered or crowdedit looked open and theres plenty of room for forests and hills and trees. I liked it right away, even from way up here. Looks like a nice place., I said in a low whisper, just for Bella to hear, We can make a good life here, together, all of us. I prayed she agreed with my thoughtsI waited for her response, or even the way she looked at me in return. She let out a little breath and turned to me, tears shining in her eyes. And she smiled at me. I shivered a little inside, so relieved and excited by it. It meant she wasnt regretting this, or me. That she wasnt angry for having to leave New York behind, along with all her dreams of graduating from NYU and having her career there, like she told me when we first met. It meant she was with me, with us Katie and I, and Ben and Angela, no matter what. And then she spoke to me. We can make a good life anywhere, Edward, as long as were all together., she whispered back firmly. She held my hand and squeezed it gently. Dont worry, Edward., Bella gave me a little smile, Well be great. Itll take work and timebut well all be fine. Im not going anywhere. Im with you, forever. But you love New York., I began, ready to screw this up for myself already.

I love you more., she cut me off right away, putting her fingers to my lips and I loved the way her soft fingertips felt there. I puckered my lips and kissed the skin against them with pure love. I love you too, Bella., I said as her fingers ghosted from my lips and down my cheekbone, I love you so much. Im so afraid Im gonna screw this up. No, Edward., she shook her head slightly, looking at me like a teacher looking at a first grader, This is a whole new start, a second chance. Dont go into it like that. Well take things one step at a time. Well make up our own rules as we go along. And if we do make a mistake, well fix it. We dont have to be perfect, you know. No one is. Its our mistakes that teach us. I smiled, Like your mistake of buying a toy? She frowned at me and then smirked at me. Youre no mistake, Edward., she said with no hint of hesitation, And even if you were, Id make it all over again. You have taught me so much. You have no idea. I smiled and decided to tease her a little. I so loved doing that to her. Would you still pay twenty grand for me?, I smiled wider as I posed this question. She returned my smile and added a little giggle to it. Definitely not., she teased back. Smiling more, I kissed her fingers and asked, How much would you pay? Hmmm., she squinted, considering, Well, the sex is incredible, I have to give you that. I just laughed at that one. But you are a brat, thats for sure., she continued, Everything I know about you took forever to get out of youand it was never easy learning all about Edward Cullen. And you definitely threw your share of tantrums. So true. I was lucky if she said anything over $500. Wait, I think I have some change., she grabbed her purse and began to reach into the bottom for some coins. We both laughed as I playfully slapped her arm. I wish I had access to her ass to give that a nice swat. Just kidding, Eduardo., she leaned in and kissed my lips, very soft. I know., I kissed her back, wanting another one of those sweet kisses. I heard the woman marshal mumble Get a room but I ignored it. Nothing could piss me off right now. Bella whispered into my ear, Making love to you I could never put a price on that. Theres not enough money in the worldloving youI can never pay you enough for that.

I gave her a little kiss and said, Maybe we can work something out. Maybe I can let you do it in installments. Hows your credit score? She burst out laughing again, and we began play fighting. Punk., she muttered. I rested again after that, feeling so renewed. We will have a great life. Everything will be good. Well make sure of it. I was starting to get more and more anxious to see Katie. It was really going to happen! Id be going to bed tonight down the hall from her room. Id get to tuck her in and kiss her goodnight. Maybe Id fall asleep in her bed with her, watching Sponge Bob, if shed allow me. I wondered if shed be angry with me, for being gone for so long. Maybe Id need to go slow with her, give her time to get to know me again. Thered be so much of my past Id have to hide or just simply forget so I could be a good Dad for her again. I swore to myself to be patient, to be like Bella always was with me as I resisted her. Id make myself worthy of Katieand Bella. I swore it with every fiber of my being. The slave whore is dead. Edward Cullen has risen from the grave and has one last chance to make things right. This is a brand new life. Thank you. Thank you Tanya, God, or whoever else might have had a hand in this. I know damn well this didnt just all happen by accident. Someone decided it was time to save me. And they did. Before we landed, the male marshal told us that he couldnt give us specifics on our friends, but that Jasper and his family joined the program and were already safely away somewhere. Emmett, too. I hoped he got his wish and found that farm he was dreaming of. I laughed whenever I thought of him trying to milk a cow. Good Luck, my best friendmy brother. I hated it that I didnt get to say goodbye to them, but thats the way this program works. But then, I already knew what Emmett would say. We dont need to have a big long goodbye to know how the other felt. He took care of me, every day, even if I didnt ask for it or seem to need it. He was there. He is my family, no matter where he is now. I hope that I was able to bring him some of the laughter and kindness that he so freely gave to me. Ill really miss himand Jasper, too. Its a gift, having such friends when youre an owned whore who sells himself for money every day. Alice and Rosalie didnt join the program. We were told that no one of James family really knew anything of their involvement in all this, and they were able to stay in New York and keep pursuing their dreams. I was glad not every life would be forever changed because of me. Alice and Jasper went their separate ways and that made me a little sad. Maybe if theyd had more time, like Bella and I had, theyd have been madly in love, but their time together was too short, or maybe it just wasnt meant to be. Bella said that Charlie would most likely be going home to Forks. And she whispered to me that shed have to find some way of contacting him to let him know we were alright, even if was only a blank postcard or something. I knew that was against the rules of the program, but I couldnt argue with her. I myself was thinking up a plan to let Joseph and Katherine know I was alive and well, too. But then my rational side argued against it, saying if anything went wrong, theyd find us. Theyd kill us all, Katie, too. Why did this second chance have to be so hard? How could I truly be happy when in the back of my head, Katherine and Joseph were there, crying, thinking I was dead, just when I came back into their lives? Id have to think more about this before I did anything.

We didnt linger long at the airport when we arrived. There was no luggage to pick up and the marshals quickly obtained us a rental car. It was a gray Mitsubishi Outlander with lots of room for us in the back seat while the marshals rode up front. The sun was shining very happily above us and I noticed it was warm but not hot like it could feel in New York around this time of year. Also, there was a nice scent in the air. I couldnt tell you what it is but I noticed it and liked it instantly. It seemed to soothe me. I even opened the window on my side half way down so it would blow over my face and play with my hair as we began movinggoing to Katie. I dont know exactly why but I felt scared now. Katie was close by. We were going to see her now. I owed her some pretty huge apologies and explanations. What if she was mad at me? What if she hated me? Worsewhat if she was indifferent to me? That would be the worst. Bella reached over and held my hand. I looked into her face and saw a gentle smile waiting there for me. I tried to smile back but Im sure she didnt buy it. Something inside me wished that she wouldnt tell me how alright it was all going to be. For once, I didnt want any assurances. I just wanted her to be with me. And she was. She didnt say a word. I smiled a real little smile and then turned back to stare out the window. I wanted to take in the town and the stores and the people walking around but all I could see was Katie. Ben and Angela had told me every detail of her every surgery and described how she looked after each one, but there was no way for me to see it firsthand. They offered to mail me pictures of her but I couldnt have my daughters pictures being mailed to Fire. I didnt want any part of her in that place. The thought sickened me. The last time I saw Katies face it was badly scarred, although she never looked ugly or deformed to me. She couldnt. What would I say to her? She wasnt a little baby anymore. Shed be mad at me if I talked to her like she were still three years old. Id have to be sure to treat her like the almost nine year old she is now. But I talked to her on the phone everyday, why am I so afraid now of how Im talking to her? I am such a mess. All too soon, the car stopped and the man at the wheel turned back to us. Were home., he said with a little grin. The female marshal smiled more at Bella but neither of us made a move from our seats. I looked and saw a cute little house with a nice sized front lawn, green and full. There was even a couple of golden tulips growing near the door. The house was white with a royal blue door, shutters to match. The number on it read 304. It was a two story house. Bedrooms upstairs. There was a driveway for two cars and a closed garage on the side. All the houses on the street looked pretty much alike, a typical suburban neighborhood. I just looked at it and felt my lips smile. The sun shone over it peacefully, almost lovingly. There seemed to be something special watching over the little place. I always wanted a sweet little home like this for Katie., I heard myself confess in a soft voice, I always loathed her being cooped up in our apartment on the ninth floor. Is there a back yard?

Sure., the woman marshal answered, opening her car door, Come on, well show you. I tensed and froze. Katie is in there. What if shes watching us right now? Go ahead, well be there in a second, okay?, Bella asked them. They gave a nod and exited the car, closing their doors as they strolled around the side of the house and went into the back yard, disappearing from view. I know., Bella squeezed my hand. She should hate me., I whispered, feeling tears prick my eyes. She wont., Bella assured me, Youre Daddy. Take it from me, a daughter. We always love our Daddies, even if they screw up now and then. How are you always so sure?, I asked, almost defensively, How do you know? Daddy is the first man we fall in love with., Bella informed, And we never lose our first love. I never thought of it that way. Its a nice sentiment. Come on, lets go see the back yard., Bella opened her door and pulled me by my hand, not giving me the luxury of wallowing in my fears for too long. Before I knew it, I was out of the car and walking at her side, not being dragged behind her, to the yard in back. The marshals were off a good distance away, to the left. The yard was a very nice size and I loved that. There was room to run back hereand there was a tall tree here, protecting the grounds. Hanging from one of its branches were three ropes holding a black tire horizontally, the open hole in the center so someone could sit upon it. I smiled more. Katie loved to swing., I recalled verbally before I realized I was doing it. I seemed to be slightly out of it, picturing a three year old Katie running and playing hereasking me to push her. Back when she needed mewanted me. Im sure she didnt need me much anymore. Be right back, okay?, Bella asked but I didnt even respond. I just stared into space and felt her hand slip away from mine. Slowly, I made my way to the swing and my fingers coiled around the ropes, wishing I really did have a beautiful three year old below me, adoring me with her eyes like she used toshe used to brush my hairand give me butterfly kisses. How could I ever get that back? Did I even deserve it back? Cool swing, huh? I spun around, knowing that voice at once. I heard it every day of my life at three o clock. I lived for it. I endured everything, knowing that the next day at three I could hear her and for a brief amount of time, not be a whore or a slave. I was Daddy. And if I didnt have that, I never wouldve made it through my years with Victoria.

There was a beautiful girl there, a distance away. Not little like she used to be, but still small to me. Her long straight strands of red hair blew across her perfect face and she didnt reach up to tame them. She seemed to feel more comfortable as her face was partially hidden from view. She was smiling. Her lips. They were perfect and full and a deep shade of pink. When I left her, I couldnt even kiss her lips because they were burnt off and her mouth was just an opening that hurt too much to even touch. She was wearing a blue t shirt and a pair of light blue denim shorts. And bare feet, no socks or shoes. She had just come out here from inside, not pausing to put them on first. Did she really want to see me that bad? I blinked and was ashamed to feel two wet lines run down my face as she studied me. I felt not good enough, not strong enoughnot worthy enough to be Daddy to her. Her chin trembled and she half laughed and sobbed in one sound and ran with all her might up to me. Just as I felt myself fall to my knees she was all around me, holding me so tight around my neck and my nose buried itself into her silk hair. She smelled like the wind and grass and a faint touch of Bonnie Bell perfume danced around us, surprising me. I used to buy her that because she envied her mothers many fancy perfumes so much and would often be caught playing at her vanity table, doused in five different ones at once, asking me how she smelled while I carried her to the tub, holding my breath. I almost forgot about that. Was she really still wearing it, remembering me too? I almost asked her about it but didnt want to embarrass her. I just held her, so tightthen loosened so I wouldnt hurt her. I wasnt sure if all her skin was restored and would hate for my first hug to cause her physical pain. And I couldnt help it but I was sobbing like a child, never wanting to let her go, ever. She clung to me and it did hurt my neck but it was the greatest hurt Id ever felt in my life. Her little fingers were in my hair and I just laid my forehead on her shoulder and cried some more, praying I wasnt scaring her. I tried to stop, but the more I did the more noise I made. Dont cry, Daddy., she whimpered in my ear as my trembling hands rested on her back, comforted by the smooth cotton of her shirt. I was scaring her. Shit. I ordered myself to stop this now. Holding it in, I heard myself give a low growl, angry at my weakness. Its okay., she kept comforting me, stroking the back of my hair, Youre home now. She pulled back from me and looked down into my wet face, finding my eyes and she looked scared suddenly. You are here to stay, right?, she asked, a little guarded, You dont have to work anymore, do you? Work. Ben mustve told her I was away working so she could get her operations. He painted me in a noble shade of colors to Katie. He didnt let her hate me. I owed him everything.

I still couldnt speak and I shook my head, smiling as the tears fell again. She squealed out in pure joy, crushing my head in her arms as she celebrated, hugging me tighter to her. Im here to stay., I said, my voice cracking everywhere, wanting to make it clear to her, Im yoursIll never leave you again. I am so sorry. Kaitlyn. I wanted to treat her like a big girl, not a baby, so I used Kaitlyn. It sounded so formal to me, like she was a stranger to me. Maybe Id have to get to know her all over again. Maybe everything I thought I knew about her was gone now that she was growing up. I told her Id never leave her again. Shes probably repulsed by that idea. In a few short years, shell be trying to get away from me, an embarrassed teenager not wanting her friends to see her clingy father. Katie, Dad., she corrected and I cried again. Shes still my Katie. After all this. She called me Dad, not Daddy. I felt that sting but shoved it away. Im lucky shes hugging me and calling me anything except bastard. Im grateful to still be invited into her magical embrace. Katie., I breathed, my sobs finally calming themselves a little. She was so loving, so brave. She kept holding me, stroking me and not pulling away like some kids would when confronted by a weeping adult. I didnt know this side of her but I admired it and her so much. Shes strong. Its okay, Daddy., her little voice said, reminding me of Bellas favorite phrase, and she planted kisses on my head, ignoring my unruly hair as she did so. Maybe I could hold it together long enough to get a good look at her face without scaring her more, although she didnt seem scared of the way I was acting. My knees were damp in the grass but I stayed there. If I should kneel before anyone, it was her. I was ready to beg her forgiveness. An angel stood before me, worthy of my servitude, my life belonged to her. My every day would be for her. My every breath would be hers. She waited for me to calm, showing no signs of wanting to bolt. Patience. Another new thing inside her that I didnt get to see bloom. Katie has been through so much, I realized. She was sure to have traits that normal girls her age didnt have yet or would never have. I intended to hear every story, know every thing that shaped her into this amazing little person who was holding me. Here., she gently tilted my face up towards hers and did something I used to do to her when she cried. She covered my face with fun little kisses, making the smooching sound I used to do. It always made her laugh. Now it was working on me. I smiled and laughed quietly, enjoying the memory and the lightness of the momentuntil she slowed her kisses. She placed one deep kiss on my forehead, then pressed her shiny lips to my right eyelidthen kissed the other, my eyes closing as she seemed to heal me with every touch of her. My eyes were wet but she kissed them anyway. She kissed my tears away. She kissed my nose and slowly gave me an Eskimo kiss with her own. I smiled more, keeping my eyes closed, feeling as if these moments were causing me to grow wings.

My Daddy., she stopped and rested her forehead on mine, Still so pretty. I missed you so so much. I almost sobbed again. I missed you too, baby., I choked, holding her face, looking into her deep bluish-green eyes, So, so much. Youll never know how damn much I missed you, Katie. I wasnt truly alive since the day I left her with Ben and Angela. Only Bella had made me feel life spark again inside my dead heart. Now it was raging inside me like an inferno, wild and out of control. But this fire wouldnt harm Katie at all. It would maybe shine the way now for her, glowingtelling her she was lovedand not alone. It said, Daddy is here. And hell never let you go again. My turn., I smiled up at her, gently and very slowly moving so not to alarm her. I moved the strands of hair as the wind played with them, away from her facewanting to see every inch, every detail. She giggled and closed her eyes as if we were playing a game and allowed me time to ghost my fingers over her forehead, gliding over her eyebrows, tracing over her closed eyelidsmy eyes slaves to her and my mouth open in amazement as I marveled at those long yellow-reddish eyelashes. I smiled, holding my tears in my eyes, not letting them spill out as I moved my shaky finger down the slope of her little nose, the little button tip of it so round, like a fairys would be. I stroked her cheekbone with the back of my fingersso carefully and tenderly that they almost didnt even touch her skin. She giggled, as if this tickled and my mouth smiled more. She kept her eyes closed. I almost didnt dare it but then my fingers moved of their own want and moved over her little smile. She puckered her lips and kissed them innocently, probably wondering when Id get on with the game and cover her face with my smooching kisses. She had probably missed it as much as I had. So I would deny her no longer and decided I would admire her later, maybe while she slept. I made myself be careful as I could but smooched kisses all over her face, head, and ears while she belly laughed, squirming in my arms a little, not really trying to escape me. She was heaven in a little mortal body. And she was mine. I didnt deserve her. But she was mine anyway. I had to say what every fiber in me was thinking. You are so beautiful., I whispered, So so beautiful. I was staring at her face and she had a funny little look in her eyes at this. Because of YOU., she smiled a bit. She thought I was talking about her faceabout what her surgeries had done for her. I had to clear that up right now. No., I almost said too loudly, my hands moving up and down her smooth arms. I tipped her chin up and said, You are beautiful, but, Katie, youve ALWAYS been beautiful. Im not just talking about your face, Katie. I mean, YOU are beautiful. Do you know what I mean? She smiled down at me, seeming wiser than an ordinary little girl. She probably was. Shes seen things no child should ever have to see. Shes probably known cruelty from others in its ugliest form. Shes also known unconditional love from

her grandparents in the face of all that, too. And shes had to face it without her mother or father. She is light years smarter than I am. I just knew that she understood by the way she was looking at me. No fire, no tragedy could diminish her beauty. No evil could touch what she is. And if it ever tried, Id pounce on it and tear it to shreds with my savage teeth. I am her Daddy. I am protector. I am the wall that must keep the Jameses and Victorias away. I would gladly do my duty to her for the rest of my life. Remember this, Daddy?, she asked, using Daddy as my name again and I had to admit I felt high inside at the sound of it. She had a little plastic gold ring around her middle finger and slipped it off. It took a couple tugs to remove it, which told me she wore it often. Oh my God!, I gasped, remembering it, You still have this? Of course, its my wedding ring!, she informed as if I were dumb to even question it, Remember when we got married? I did remember. Katie loved Disney and every movie ended with the prince and princess getting married and living happily ever after. She looked sad one day and told me that she wished she could get married and have someone love her like that. I told her someday she would find a great man that would. Then she discovered that meant he would take her away from me. She didnt like that at all. A couple days later, she asked me to marry her. She even got down on one knee and took my hand. It was the cutest and funniestand most wonderful moment of my life. And she was only three, she didnt understand the complexities of romance and love and marriage. But in her child mind, she was saying that I was the man in her life, and she loved me, and wanted to be with my forever. I knew that would change someday as she grew up, but I couldnt deny her. I accepted her sweet proposal and then our big palace wedding preparations began. I let her order me around like a slave and she told me exactly how she wanted everything to be. Since Katies room was already designed like a princess room, thanks to Tanyas artistic painting on all the walls, I didnt have to do much transforming there, but I did borrow Tanyas fancy red silk bedsheets (ones we didnt use anymore now that we were parents) and spread them on the floor so my princess could walk to the altar upon the luxurious train she desired. Tanya wouldve killed me if she caught us but then I went even further and let Katie wear one of Tanyas fancy white gowns that was far too long for her, along with lots of her nicest jewelry. Tanyas prom tiara served as a nice crown and I even let Katie do her own lipstick, using Tanyas shiny red one. She said the groom wasnt allowed to do the brides makeup so I just watched, trying not to laugh as she covered her mouth and lots of skin around her mouth with the lipstick. She was the most stunning bride Id ever seen. I was so not good enough for her and I kept wondering when her father would break in and stop this wedding because of it. I searched around in vain in her toy box for a ring. I couldve sworn I had bought lots of fake jewelry sets for her but Id be damned if I could find any of them now. Finally, I got lucky and found a Barbie with a plastic gold bracelet. I fought her and mugged her, stealing it off her wrist. It was just the right size.

We didnt have a minister to do the talking, but we didnt need one. I explained to Katie that weddings could be different from the ones on TV and all we needed to do was say we loved each other, let me put the ring on her finger, smooch, and that was it. I was told I needed a princes cape so I borrowed a black silk sheet from our old beddings and tied it around my neck. I wished I couldve found a color besides black. I felt so weird and evil in it. I know if anyone else spied this little scene, Id look about as innocent as Michael Jackson in the middle of one of his sleepovers, but I didnt care. This was purely innocent and my little girl wanted to play wedding. I was honored to be chosen as the groom. One day, shed marry for real and Id be giving her away. I knelt and began to sing the melody of here comes the bride. She was so cute holding flowers and taking small steps, putting her feet together before taking the next step. She really did watch weddings closely on TV. I held in my big smile, not wanting her to scold me for laughing at her. After all, this was a serious moment. Its not everyday you get married. She was finally in front of me and I thought up what to say to begin this ceremony. Oh! Right! We are gathered here today, I said in a loving voice as I looked into her eyes, To celebrate our love and to vow never to be apart. That sounds innocent, I hoped. What does vow mean ?, Katie whispered to me. Oh, sorry., I whispered, It means, promise. She nodded and smiled big, having no problem with this. That means you promise never to run off with some cuter guy., I teased, Or a younger guy, or richer, or more fun than your old man. And you promise to listen to every thing I say, until youremmmeighty five years old. I promise., she twinkled with purity, having no idea what she was swearing to me. I wish I had this on tape., I mumbled to myself, knowing the minute she turned 16, shed forget these promises. Wed fight almost every day and Id have to keep the boys away from her. I wasnt looking forward to that. Alright, getting to a lighter note I decided to make my vow first, showing her how. Katie Cullen..., I cleared my throat, smiling as I looked into her eyes, taking her little hand and holding the ring, not slipping it onto her finger yet, I love you with all my heart. And I will always love you. You are the most beautiful girl in the whole world, you have a magical laugh, and youre also very smart. Marriage is not only about being beautiful, you know, Katie. Your husband also has to respect you for your brains and what you are inside. Dont ever forget that, alright?

Alright., she said, not looking too sure of what I was trying to say. I decided to Disney it up a little to make her happy. For richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, from now to foreverI promise to love youalways., I swore, meaning it completely, as if I had a choice in that. Loving her was like breathing. I had to, I lived to. I leaned down and kissed her forehead, closing my eyes, and I slipped the ring onto her finger. It slid right on, not too tight, not too loose. Now me!, she looked at me, wanting her turn. Yes, now you., I gave a nod, smiling. Edward Cullen, she said in her baby voice, trying to sound grown up. You are the cutest boy I know., she began as I tried not to laugh, And youre very smart, too. You always know how to make me breakfast, lunch, and dinner, you carry me on your shoulders when I get tired, and you know when all my favorite shows come on. I like it when you sleep in my bed with me and watch TV with me. You drive us to the park and to the store and I like that. I love it when you get me a new Barbie, even if I dont ask for one. You are a wonderful husband and I love you. She took my hand and slipped an invisible ring onto my middle finger. To me, it was more real than any ring I ever owned. Id never be without it. She pulled me to her by my cape and kissed me big on the lips, covering my mouth with the abundant amount of lipstick she was wearing. I guess she saw the bride and groom kiss on the lips somewhere. MMMWAHH!!, she sounded as she ended the kiss and released me. She looked so happy as she beamed at me. Youre mine now., she announced. Ive always been yours, babyI always will be. Now I carry you over the threshold!, I scooped her up in my arms, bridal style and stood up, swinging her in my arms and spinning around, making her belly laugh as she clutched onto me. Finally I stopped and she just laid in my arms, smiling up at me with so much love in her eyes. I love you Daddy., she said as naturally as letting out a breath. I love you, too, baby., I said with all my heart. The moment was perfect. And then I decided to tease her a little. I stood her on her bed and looked down at her. Now go clean my house and cook me something nice for dinner., I smirked. Maybe if I showed her what married life was really, she wouldnt try to get married away from me so fast later. She squealed out in protest and jumped off the bed, ready to argue.

No, no, no!, she began as I smiled, walking to the living room with her right on my heels, Now you take me on a honeymoon! I laughed, keeping my cape on for now. I wanted to tease her some more but couldnt do it to her, she was too cute. Where would you like to go, Mrs. Cullen?, I sat on the sofa, watching her crawl up on it next to me. DISNEY WORLD!, she shouted. Oh God, I still have the lipstick all over my mouth. Id have to wait to wipe it off. I didnt see that coming., I muttered. She laughed and hopped off the couch, going to my bedroom. For a second, I thought I got off easy. She usually begged me for an hour to take her to Disney World, like it was ten minutes away. Damn TV Disney World commercials! I heard a couple noises I wasnt sure of and then Katie was coming out of my room with my pillows in her hands. She went into her room and placed them on her bed. She came back and was on her way back to my room again. Whatre you doing, Mrs. Cullen?, I raised a brow. Moving your stuff into my room., she informed as if this was obvious and disappeared into my room again. Uh oh. I had to find a nice way of handling this one. If all my things were moved out of our bedroom, it was set Tanya off, making her think I did it because of the tension between us. Uhhhwait a minute, honey., I followed her into my room, ready for our first argument as man and wife. I was back in the present now with my almost nine year old daughter and was smiling from ear to ear. I remember., I said, almost breaking down again, slipping it back onto her finger. Youre still mine, Daddy., she hugged me again, softer this time. Thats what this ring meant to her. That even though I was gone, I was still hers, because I had promised. She believed me. And she waited for me. I wanted to ask her why, why she still wanted me, why she even thought I was good enough for her. She didnt know where Id been the last few years. She could never know. I would die if she found out and hated me for it. As my brain reeled with all this, she simplified it all, as she always did for me. Push me, Dad?, she backed from me and climbed on the tire swing. I numbly stood and followed, like a hypnotized servant as she held onto the ropes and waited for me. I moved around behind her, and magically, at that second, it was like not a day had gone by. My little girl wanted me to push her on the swing. She loves me. She forgives me. And finally, I was able to take a deep breath, letting go of a great deal of pain. It wasnt completely gone, but right now at this moment, I feel cleanand freeand real. Im a Daddystillalways.

I pulled back gently on the ropes of the swing and pushed, not too hard. My hands still thought of her as three years old, I guess. Harder, DAD!!, she demanded as she swung back to me, Come on!! Uh oh, shes a little thrill seeker now. She used to be so scared to go up high. Shes not a baby anymore. Alright, you asked for it!, I bit down on my bottom lip and devilishly grabbed the tire and hurled it down with half my might. Her blood piercing scream shot up to the trees above, birds flying away in terror. I looked and saw Bella near the house talking to Ben and Angela. They were all looking at Katie and I, smiling, letting us alone, letting us play. I hope this sleepy little town is ready. The Cullens have arrived. Oh sorry, the Masens. Thats our new fake last name, me being Anthony Masen. Am I supposed to be Italian? I hope no one calls me Tony. I refuse to answer to that. One thing is for sure. Nothing will ever be the same again. Thank God. I drew a line in the earth as Katie swung away from me. I crossed over it, and pushed Katie again, hearing her approving screams as she soared up. Im here. Ive crossed the line and am Daddy now. Ill never go back again. Im hereforever, for better or worsefrom now to forever. THE END!!!