To The Love of My Life

(To whomsoever it may concern!)

Its been a while but I think you would have got used to my absence. But I want to remind you that I still havent. It feels that it was just the other day when we used to walk hand in hand under the autumn trees when the bare branches showed new promise with the emergence of fresh green leaves as we trampled the ones that had been replaced. It was just yesterday is what my heart says to my mind when it recalls the slender figure of yours which used to fill my embrace and we used to travel through the seventh heaven. That too without using any narcotics! You see how charming and delirious your persona was. I want you to know that I cannot live without my drug. I cannot live without you. It was just the other day when my forsaken heart had found the one which had touched its remotest corner with a single perception of sight. You see how enigmatic you are. I swear I cannot exist without the most prominent part of my life missing. Its only you who can empower my lifeless soul. It was just the other day when we had taken the oath and pledges to relive each and every moment we had shared. To engrave each and every moment of time we spend together onto the walls of our mind which would last to eternity. My mind is replete with your images all the time. Such is the aura of your personality. I think I must have been erroneous or I might have done something which you dislike. I know you are hurt and I dont wish to enhance the magnitude of your present state of affairs by saying an obvious sorry. My heart writhes and anguishes in pain witnessing the trouble that you have been through all because of me. I just wish to say that I love you from the bottom of my heart. Whatever the feelings be in the deepest trenches of my lonesome heart, its for none but one. You guessed it right. Its you. The autumn just passed on with the spring setting in. The trees and plants bustling with fresh sets of young green leaves ready to relive their ancestral journey. But I know you loved winter. You loved the snow with the geometrical snowflakes falling on your cheeks and chin as you used to let out a sigh of relief and revelry. I know I am not a person endowed with any kind of supernatural power but I could try better than the best to get you what your heart longed for. Set me free and se the real me, Let me let go & Ill show, For you the changes I can bring, Even winter in spring,

I know that this thing I wrote above must make you think that I am really damn drunk or still overhung with my last nights misadventures. But its not that way actually. My life is no more less than an automated machine following the instructions being fed into it. Its you who can fill in the hue, every color, every shade. All my instincts would return when you would be back. Its in your eyes I see the light, the heat, In your eyes I am complete, Its you, who can fill me with the energy, And rejuvenate and invigorate my being, And make my existence worthwhile indeed, You are the elixir of life, The one I dearly need. Words are falling short and they are bound to because describing you will never end as I have endless memories with you to cherish forever. I know you would really come back because I know that as much as I am missing you, you must be missing me too. I may not be able to see you again after I have finished writing but I believe fate and destiny are meant for the serendipitous meeting of those souls which are destined to live together. As they commonly say that they make those souls one in heaven but they are sent as two distinct individuals on earth. Nonetheless they find out a way to live together again. I know you would come to me. I know for sure because fortuitous things do happen and I firmly believe that its the two of us who had been one in heaven and we would live together here on earth. I can still recall your kohl rimmed hazel eyes whose depth was deeper than the deepest trenches of the ocean known to mankind, your hair smoother than the smoothest strand of silk gliding through my fingers, your smile which used to light up the entire me. You see I am completely dependent on you for my very existence and I want you back dearly because if you are not there for me now then I may not give life a second chance!

Abhishek Rathore