Академический Документы
Профессиональный Документы
Культура Документы
What You Need to Know: Your Competency as a Parent, Partner Professional, etc and CoDependent Behavior
Co-dependency is a primary illness developed through a dysfunctional pattern of living and problem solving which is nurtured by a set of rules within the family system. These rules make healthy growth and change very difficult.
-OR-
3/21/2011
Literally
SELF
SURVIVAL-health/safety/shelter SURVIVAL-health/safety/shelter
3/21/2011
OTHERS SELF
SURVIVAL-health/safety/shelter
1. Others Codependent behavior takes us back to the first level. OTHERS SURVIVAL health/safety/shelter 2. Survival Once back here we repeat the same behavior and of course get the same result!
PROGRESSION OF AN ADDICTION
EARLY NO SYMPTOMS NOTICEABLE MIDDLE SYMPTOMS BEGINTO SHOW UP LATE DIAGNOSIBLE BY A 10 YEAR OLD
PROGRESSION OF CODEPENDENCY
EARLY NO SYMPTOMS NOTICEABLE IN FACT, SEEN AS A WONDERFUL CARING PERSON MIDDLE SYMPTOMS BEGINING TO SHOW UP, HOWEVER STILL LOOKS LIKE A CARING SENSITIVE PERSON LATE DIAGNOSIBLE. ANGRY, REPEATING BEHAVIOR, SEES LIFE AS BLACK AND WHITE, CONTROLLING, ETC.
3/21/2011
OTHERS
SELF SELF
and
YOU YOU
and
OTHERS
OTHERS NO ONE
OTHERS
OTHERS
SELF
OTHERS
S E L F
NO ONE
3/21/2011
ADDICT
CODEPENDENCY
O T H E R S
SELF
OTHERS
S E L F
no one
NO ONE
THE WINNER
THE ADDICT Your son Your daughter Your partner Your husband Your wife Your mother Your father Your client.
CODEPENDENT
Addict
Frozen feelings Trouble with intimacy Low self esteem Develop victim role Boundary issues Personalize everything Dont trust your perceptions and/or instincts Others behavior is a reflection of you Unrealistic expectations for yourself Use control and manipulation in relationships Fear rejection and abandonment
3/21/2011
The Co-dependent
Often we feel we are expected to: Put our own issues aside Maintain control Create a safe environment for our Husband, wife, son, daughter, mom, dad, client whomever
-so-
AVOID
Believing that we can manipulate our others into becoming healthy
We must -
COMPLIANT
HEALTHY
AVOID
Feeling personal blame when things dont go right
AVOID
Taking credit for others success
3/21/2011
AVOID AVOID
Linking success with our efforts Second-guessing every decision we make..
SOLUTIONS:
1. THERAPY 2. SELF EXAMINATION 3. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS 4. AL-ANON 5. OTHER 12 STEP MEETINGS
3/21/2011
TWELVE STEPS OF ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. Make a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. Make a list of all persons we have harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. Made direct amends to such people whenever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
STEP 6 WERE ENTIRELY READY TO HAVE GOD REMOVE ALL THESE DEFECTS OF CHARACTER.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. 11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge His will for us and the power to carry that out. 12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
RULE 62
DONT TAKE YOURSELF TOO SERIOUSLY!!