Here is the bowling chart after the match against Thongsbridge C&BC at Almondbury BC on Saturday

28th June which we won 9/7 since we had 6 winners each (one by default) and we won 1 point each for
drawing with winners and 2 points for winning the aggregate 193/185

Mv LW TW Name Agg Pts Tot Pts Lost Pts Av Agg Plyd Won Lost
> 1 1 Knight Rider 67 126 59 11.17 6 6 0
> 2 2 Magyar 65 147 82 9.29 7 7 0
▲ 4 3 Billy Bunny 28 115 87 4.67 6 5 1
▲ 5 4 Tonto Junior 28 126 98 4.00 7 4 3
▼ 3 5 Capt Picard 24 80 56 6.00 4 3 1
> 6 6 Bimbo 10 107 97 1.67 6 4 2
▲ 10 7 Ghoulash 8 116 108 1.14 7 4 3
▼ 7 8 Elmer Fudd 5 88 83 1.00 5 2 3
▼ 8 9 The Chosen One -4 121 125 -0.57 7 3 4
>> NE 10 Rolf Harris -6 15 21 -6.00 1 0 1
▼ 9 11 Moggy -10 80 90 -2.00 5 2 3
▼ 11 12 The Eskimo -26 70 96 -5.20 5 2 3
▼ 12 13 Mad Mick -41 64 105 -8.20 5 0 5
▼ 13 14 Happy -66 60 126 -11.00 6 0 6
▼ 14 15 TB -96 30 126 -16.00 6 0 6
Our seventh match at Almondbury was certainly He added that he was the No1 player and should
very entertaining with Goulash winning first on have been allocated with another game and one
the sweep, The Knight Rider considering a pitch of the Muppets like me could of sat on the
invasion, arguments erupting over the marking benches and got a 21/0 win by default and he
of Tonto Juniors card and a epic finale at the end would have been virtually certain to score
which Bimbo went on to win 21/20. another win.
Scor
Player Score Oponent e
Knight Rider 21 D Kaye 0
Ghoulash 21 J Moore 2
Tonto Junior 21 A Sanders 9
Magyar 21 A Fish 13
Billy Bunny 21 Jason Hewison 15
Bimbo 21 R Moorhouse 20
Rolf Harris 15 T Brierley 21
Mad Mick 14 K Marsh 21
The Chosen One 13 R Mathews 21
Moggy 13 R Smith 21
Happy 7 P Schofield 21
TB 5 E Ingham 21
Total 193 Total 185 The 21/0 win only contributed to the match
First Sweep Winner Second Sweep Winner statistics but on the player league it wasn’t
Not Included In included therefore The Knight Rider is now with
Oponent Refused To Play Averages
in striking distance of Magyar who has got
With The Knight Rider not having a match due
aggregate points of 65 to The Knight Riders 67
to his opponent being “too ill” to play he was
however of course Magyar has played 7 matches
awarded a 21/0 win however he wasn’t happy
to The Knight Riders six and his average is
about it, saying he had come a long way and was
unaffected.
looking forward to a match.
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Indeed I would of gladly forfeited my match to My dad, Wonderwood, his name from his former
The Knight Rider, I lost once again 21/14 despite glories in times of old when he played bowls
I think bowling very well for me. said as I came off the green following another
defeat that he wished he could play and I agreed
with him that I too wished I could play.
My dad is now partially confined to a wheelchair
due to Parkinson’s disease and confesses he
really looks forward to his Saturday Afternoons
watching our team play.
Sadly I wont be able to play on Saturday 19th
July because I will be going on a camping
holiday to Skipsea but The Chosen One and
Captain Picard are going to keep a copy of the
players results so I will be able to update the
bowling league on my return.
I must apologise to Goulash who is stuck with
Our practise session at the Rabbits Club on this name after a bit of a misunderstanding when
Thursday night was cancelled due to rain I was talking to him about Magyars new name at
therefore it took me a while to warm up on the our match at Hillhouse and Birkby.
green and by then I was 7/0 down.
This time I really tried to concentrate and did
almost catch back up at one point making it to
14/10 down.
But Ken Marsh was a very good player and a
better player than me, he certainly brought out
the best in my bowling, I went over to where the
Knight Rider was sat wearing a face that could
stop a clock and asked him how I did.
He exclaimed that I did okay for a Muppet and
told me in no uncertain terms to get the camera
out of his face before he shoves it where the sun
don’t shine but using rather more colourful
language for the latter.
Clearly he wasn’t happy, he had come along with
his lady friend and my son, Luke’s, Uncle
Rimmer who was thinking up his next sponsored
quest to make some money, and I didn’t stay
around any longer for further comments,
particularly because he was also vexed that I had He said his friend was talking about what
featured him wearing a Manchester United top Hungarian people eat, which is like a stew
again in last weeks bowling magazine and he is containing rats, toadstools, bits of trees and
actually a big Chelsea supporter. anything they can find and that is called
After scoring another for to my opponent, Ken’s Goulash, he wasn’t actually trying to suggest a
3 and with a lot of encouragement from Tonto name for him, but he added with a sigh, “I guess
Junior I made it to 14/17 down but I never I am stuck with it now”
scored again letting Ken get two twos in quick Anyway this week Goulash won seconds on the
succession and loosing my 5th consecutive match sweep with his fantastic 21/2 win, he said that he
of what is in effect my first season as a only won £7 instead of £8 because The Knight
recovering alcoholic.
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Rider wanted his £1 back due to him not being
eligible to win it and despite paying into it.
Seconds on the Sweep went to Tonto Junior
who’s card was being marked by Goulash and
there was a bit of a disagreement between
Goulash and Tonto’s opponent, A Sanders
Marker when it couldn’t be decided if it was
20/5 or 18/7 due to the allocation of a two scored
at one of the ends, I had being watching this
match in between trying to wind The Knight
Rider up and was 99% certain that Goulash’s
marking was accurate.
Apparently if two markers disagree about the
scores on one of the ends and cannot rectify it
the scores go back to when they were last
checked which would in this case have been the
tenth end when Tonto Junior was leading 12/3,
but reluctantly realising our man was so far
ahead Goulash backed down.
Anyway all was not lost because Tonto Junior
still won 21/9 collecting the 4 pound seconds on
the sweep.
Magyar and Billy Bunny also won there matches
giving us at the end 5 winners to Thongs bridge’s
6 and we were winning on aggregate 172 to their
165 when the last match was on which kept
everyone except the Knight Rider on the edge of
their seats.
(by this time The Knight Rider had gone home)
In the end after some absolutely spectacular
bowling knowing the pressure was on them both
for the entire match Bimbo won Ray Moorhouse
21/20, but Magyar who I was stood next to
watching the awesome battle told me that Bimbo
should of used more curved marks rather than
riding the bias into the crown and opting for
straight marks which he said they were both
evenly matched on.
He also said that he prefers to be on right at the
end with all the green to play on than being on
with the Muppets at the beginning and bowls
flying around everywhere.
In the end of course Bimbo won his game, but it
was close, therefore we had 6 winners apiece
and won on aggregate making it 9/7.
Happy who had bet 10p with Tonto Junior that
Bimbo would lose was glad to give Tonto his
winnings and we all agreed that the climax at the
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end was one of the best battles we had witnessed
this season.
We also had a new player in the Team, someone
I think looks like a unshaved Rolf Harris so I
have of course given him a beard and
moustache, he did very well for his debut league
match pulling straight into the league 5/1 against
T Brierley.
After loosing the block T Brierley managed to
score 8 with three 2’s and two 1’s bringing the
score to 9/5 down to Rolf.
By this time The Knight Rider was encouraging
our man and unsure of his true name and just
having been talking to me was actually calling
him “Rolf”.
Rolf eventually ended up losing 21/15 but it was
a excellent debut match and I am sure we will
see more from this character
New DVD Out Soon
With all the video footage I have been doing
over the last 7 matches and the footage collected
here at our match at Farnley Tyas I am going to
put a bit of a DVD together for you all and will
give you all a copy next week at our match at
Ravensknowle park before I go on my holiday
for a week to Skipsea and will therefore our
match at Meltham on 19th July but I will be back
refreshed and ready to do battle if called up for
our match at Skelmanthorpe on 2nd August.
Anyway the DVD is called Bowl Wars and the
cover looks like this, I do hope you all enjoy it.
 and the matches we lost in orange, the first
column with “us” has our scores.
League Position
Mv LW TW Team Name Plyd W D L Pnts
> 1 1 Almondbury Lib C 7 6 0 1 74
▲ 6 2 Outlane BC 7 3 0 4 69
▼ 2 3 Almondbury BC 7 4 0 3 68
> 4 4 Farnley Tyas 7 5 0 2 67
> 5 5 Primrose Hill Lib 7 5 0 2 60
▼ 3 6 Skel Windmill 7 5 0 2 58
Thongsbridge
▲ 8 7 CBC 7 1 0 6 48
▲ 9 8 Elland CA&BC 7 2 0 5 44
▼ 7 9 Kirkheaton C&BC 7 3 0 4 43
> 10 10 Cowcliffe Lib 7 1 0 6 39
I have managed to find the actual league scores
from the Huddersfield Examiner this week and
they are as follows:
Outlane A (217) 12 Skel W (194) 4
Farnley T (252) 16 Kirkheaton CBC (145) 0
Almondbury Lib (212) 9 Elland CBC (198) 7
Almondbury BC (242) 14 Cowcliffe Lib (167) 2
Thongsbridge (185) 7 Primrose Hill Lib (193) 9
“Bowl Wars” DVD out Saturday 12th July
Fixtures List for Rest of Rabbits Club
Finally we had a good Thursday night at the
Season Rabbits club this week, in attendance were
Date Us Oponents Op Venue
Happy, Mad Mick, The Eskimo, TB and Rolf
12/04/08 12 Kirkheaton C&BC 4 Golcar C & AC
Harris and we had a special coaching session
26/04/08 9 Almondbury BC 7 Outlane BC
03/05/08 11 Farnley Tyas BC 5 Cowcliffe Lib
from our No2 bowler, Magyar who concentrated
10/05/08 5 Almondbury Lib 11 Kirkheaton C&BC
his efforts on Happy and TB them being the two
31/05/08 5 Elland CA&BC 11 Albion BC Muppets.
21/06/08 9 Cowcliffe Lib 7 Hillhouse & B TB played well in the friendly atmosphere, like
28/06/08 9 Thongsbridge CBC 7 Almondbury BC he usually does, it’s just in matches when he
05/07/08 Outlane BC Farnley Tyas BC can’t bowl.
12/07/08 Skel Windmill Ravensknowle Park The Eskimo says he would like to have seen an
19/07/08 Kirkheaton C&BC Skel Central appearance by our No1 bowler however he heard
02/08/08 Almondbury BC Meltham No 1 rumours that he had prior engagements.
09/08/08 Farnley Tyas BC Elland No 1 The Knight Rider is now like royalty and is
16/08/08 Almondbury Lib Denby Dale BC
famous all over Huddersfield; he was apparently
23/08/08 Elland CA&BC Thorpe Green BSC
busy opening a branch of Morrison’s in Bradford
30/08/08 Cowcliffe Lib Clayton West BC
so he couldn’t be with us, maybe next week.
06/09/08 Thongsbridge CBC Linthwaite Hall
13/09/08 Outlane BC Skel Windmill
Anyway my spirit guide called Dripping Tap has
20/09/08 Skel Windmill Holmfirth BC
prophesised that I will win my match at Farnley
On Holiday No News Tyas so it will be interesting to see if he is right.
Coverage Well until next week I will bid you Farewell.
Lost Won
Above you can see the fixtures list for the rest of
the season, our wins I have highlighted in pink

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