Self- and Observer-Rating at Entry and Exit level of each semester

On a scale of 1-10 (1 being the lowest and 10 the highest) please rate yourself/the student on: Sem-3 (IPC) 1. 2. 3. 4. Communication Skills Interpersonal Skills Conflict Management Negotiation Skills Ratings (Entry Level) Ratings (Exit Level)

Topics Covered (In Detail) Module I: Interpersonal Communication : An Introduction Importance of Interpersonal Communication, Types Self and Other Oriented, Rapport Building NLP, Communication Mode, Steps to improve Interpersonal Communication Activity 1: Chinese whisper Activity 2: Communicate without Looking Learning Outcomes understanding the importance of interpersonal communication in personal and professional life and understanding the barriers to communication Module II: Behavioral Communication Meaning and Nature of behavioral communication, Persuasion, Influence, Listening and Questioning, Guidelines for developing Human Communication skills, Relevance of Behavioral Communication for personal and

professional development Activity1: Effective nonverbal communication activity Activity 2: Probing activity Activity 3: Discussing the importance of Behavioral communication in ones life. Learning Outcomes Understanding the differences in the non verbal behaviour of individuals. Understanding the importance of persuasion, influence, listening and questioning in communication. Understanding the importance of probing in personal and professional situations. Module III: Interpersonal Styles Transactional Analysis, Life Position/Script Analysis, Games Analysis, Interactional and Transactional Styles Activity 1: Discussion on the concept of Transactional Analysis (TA) Activity2: Case study on Transactional Analysis (TA) Activity 3: Psychometric test on TA Learning Outcomes understanding the concept of Transactional Analysis Understanding how we differently we communicate indifferent situations Module IV: Conflict Management Meaning and nature of conflicts, Styles and techniques of conflict management, Conflict management and interpersonal communication Activity1: Discussion on conflict and its management. Activity2: Psychometric test on conflict management style. Activity 3: Case study on Conflict management and decision making. Learning: Better understanding about conflict Learning of Conflict management skills Module V: Negotiation Skills Meaning and Negotiation approaches (Traditional and Contemporary),

Process and strategies of negotiations, Negotiation and interpersonal communication

Activity 1: A Role Play on real life situations. Activity2: Imparting students the strategies to indulge in win-win negotiation ( Details discussed in the end) Activity 3: Discussion on how to give feedback after negotiation Learning: understanding the art of negotiation understanding how interpersonal communication is important for negotiation understanding the strategies of negotiations.

Details of the Activities Module 1 Activity 1: Chinese whisper Aim: It shows how easily information can become corrupted by indirect communication. It can also be used to teach students to moderate the volume of their voice, and how to listen attentively. Instructions: Mary had a terrier dog like sentences where passed on in groups of 7-8 people to see where alteration in the original message has occurred and discuss the causes for the same Activity 2: Communicate without Looking Aim: Body language and eye contact are the two important aspects of effective communication. This activity has eliminated these two aspects. The main aim behind this activity is to explain the importance of eye contact and body language for effective communication. Instructions: Two participants for this activity have to sit back-to back and converse on a given topic. After the conversation ends, a feedback from the audience will be collected to see how this conversation, devoid of any eye contact, was different from a normal conversation.

Module 2

Activity 1: Effective nonverbal communication activityAim: The purpose of this activity is to define what you and others in the class consider effective nonverbal behavior in some social situations. Instructions: For each of the social situations below, list the nonverbal behaviors you believe will achieve the stated goal. Compare the responses of the group members. Reflect on the behavior of yourself and others and consider how you might change some of your nonverbal cues to communicate more effectively. Prepare a response to share with the class. Example: Initiate a conversation with a stranger at a party Nonverbal cues: 1. make eye contact, 2. offer hand in greeting, 3. smile, 4. come within four feet of the other person, 5. turn body towards the other person, 6. nod occasionally when the other is talking. 1) Take control or exercise leadership in a class group. 2) Come across well in a job interview. 3) Tell an interesting joke or story. 4) Appear friendly and warm without coming on too strong. 5) Signal your desire to leave a conversation when the other person keeps on talking. Activity 2: Probing ActivityAim: Probing questions can also help someone to express their feelings and sensations. Sometimes it is a customer who is saying something vague and woolly, maybe because they have a limited grasp of technical issues which are our day-to-day work. On other occasions we are trying to draw information out of a colleague. They have an idea or a concern that we do not clearly understand, and we need to help them express it in detail. Interviewers and negotiators use probing questions to draw out the information they need. Probing questions can also be used when someone is reluctant to talk a staff member who performance is affected by a personal problem, perhaps; or a witness to a disciplinary matter. A good listener, skilled in the use of probing questions, is able to draw out more information so that it is comprehensive, specific and clear. Instructions: This training activity starts with an introduction to the idea of probing questions a Participants work in pairs, asking probing questions about a smell. Then they complete a similar task, but this time asking questions about a colored photograph that their partner is looking at. Finally, there is a group interview exercise based on drawing out details about holidays.

Module 3 Activity 1: Concept of Transactional Analysis Transactional analysis - modern usage - introduction Transactional Analysis is a theory developed by Dr. Eric Berne in the 1950s. Transactional Analysis is a social psychology and a method to improve communication. The theory outlines, how we have developed and treat ourselves, how we relate and communicate with others, and offers suggestions and interventions which will enable us to change and grow. Transactional Analysis is underpinned by the philosophy that: people can change we all have a right to be in the world and be accepted Transactional analysis - ego states Berne devised the concept of ego states to help explain how we are made up, and how we relate to others. These are drawn as three stacked circles and they are one of the building blocks of Transactional Analysis. They categorize the ways we think, feel and behave and are called Parent, Adult, and Child. Each ego state is given a capital letter to denote the difference between actual parents, adults and children.

Parent ego state This is a set of feelings, thinking and behavior that we have copied from our parents and significant others. For example, we may notice that we are saying things just as our father, mother, grandmother may have done, even though, consciously, we don't want to. We do this as we have lived with this person so long that we automatically reproduce certain things that were said to us, or treat others as we might have been treated.

Adult ego state The Adult ego state is about direct responses to the here and now. We deal with things that are going on today in ways that are not unhealthily influenced by our past. The Adult ego state is about being spontaneous and aware with the capacity for intimacy. When in our Adult we are able to see people as they are, rather than what we project onto them. We ask for information rather than stay scared and rather than make assumptions. Taking the best from the past and using it appropriately in the present is an integration of the positive aspects of both our Parent and Child ego states. So this can be called the Integrating Adult. Child ego state The Child ego state is a set of behaviors, thoughts and feelings which are replayed from our own childhood. Transactional analysis - strokes In Transactional Analysis we call compliments and general ways of giving recognition strokes. We all have particular strokes we will accept and those we will reject. For example, if we have always been told we are clever, and our brother is creative, then we are likely to accept strokes for being clever, but not for being creative. From this frame of reference only one person in the family can be the creative one and so on. Stroking can be physical, verbal or nonverbal. It is likely that the great variety of stroke needs and styles present in the world results from differences in wealth, cultural mores, and methods of parenting. The stroke economy Claude Steiner suggests that, as children, we are all indoctrinated by our parents with five restrictive rules about stroking. don't give strokes when we have them to give don't ask for strokes when we need them don't accept strokes if we want them don't reject strokes when we don't want them don't give ourselves strokes Strokes can be positive or negative: A) "I like you" B) "I don't like you" Strokes can be unconditional or conditional. An unconditional stroke is a stroke for being whereas a conditional stroke is a stroke for doing. For instance: "I like you" - unconditional "I like you when you smile" - conditional As negative strokes these might be: "I don't like you" - negative unconditional "I don't like you when you're sarcastic" - negative conditional People often have a stroke filter. They only let in strokes which they think they are allowed to let in. For instance they allow themselves to receive strokes for being clever and keep out strokes for being good looking. One way to think about this to consider being out in the rain. The rain is the strokes that are available to us, both positive and negative. There is a hole in the umbrella and some of the strokes go through and we

save them in a bucket to enjoy in lean times. Conversely we might use them negatively to reinforce the negative strokes we give to ourselves. Of course, some just bounce off the umbrella and we might not accept the good strokes that are coming our way. Some might come in but fall straight onto the floor. Transactional analysis - life positions Life positions are basic beliefs about self and others, which are used to justify decisions and behavior. When we are conceived we are hopefully at peace, waiting to emerge into the world once we have grown sufficiently to be able to survive in the outside of the womb. If nothing untoward happens we will emerge contented and relaxed. In this case we are likely to perceive the world from the perspective of I am OK and You are OK. However, perhaps our mother had some traumatic experiences, or the birth was difficult or even life threatening. This experience is likely to have an effect on the way we experience the world, even at the somatic level. In which case we might emerge sensing that life is scary and might, for example, go into "I am not OK and You are not OK either". Let's take it that the pregnancy went fine, and the birth was easy enough. What then? Well life experiences might reinforce our initial somatic level life position, or contradict it. If we were treated punitively, talked down to, and not held, we may begin to believe "I am not OK and You are OK". This might be the only sense we can make of our experiences. Let's take another situation. Perhaps we were picked on and bullied as a child. We learnt that the way to get by was to bully others and that way we felt stronger and in control. Our behaviour then comes into the I am OK and You are not OK quadrant. Of course this may cover up our belief that we are really not OK, but nobody sees that. They just see our behaviour, and in fact we may have forgotten all about our negative feelings about ourselves as we have tried so hard to deny the pain of believing we are not OK. There are a number of ways of diagramming the life positions. Franklin Ernst drew the life positions in quadrants, which he called the OK Corral (1971). We have put these into red and green to show the effective and ineffective quadrants for communication and healthy relationships. By shading in the quadrants according to the amount of time we think we spend in each we can get an idea of the amount of time we spend in each. Ernst used the term 'Corralogram' for this method of self-assessment using the OK Corral matrix.

Blame model The Transactional Analysis 'Okay Corral' can be linked to 'blame', for which Jim Davis TSTA developed this simple and helpful model. Commonly when emotions are triggered people adopt one of three attitudes relating to blame, which each correlate to a position on the Okay Corral: I'm to blame (You are okay and I'm not okay - 'helpless') You are to blame (I'm okay and you are not okay - 'angry') We are both to blame (I'm not okay and you are not okay - 'hopeless') None of these is a healthy position. Instead the healthy position is, and the mindset should be: "It's no-one's fault, blame isn't the issue - what matters is how we go forward and sort things out." (I'm okay and you are okay - 'happy') (With acknowledgements to Jim Davis TSTA) Transactional analysis - the script The script is a life plan, made when we are growing up. It is like having the script of a play in front of us - we read the lines and decide what will happen in each act and how the play will end. The script is developed from our early decisions based upon our life experience. We may not realize that we have set ourselves a plan but we can often find this out if we ask ourselves what our favorite childhood story was, who was our favorite character in the story and who do we identify with. Then consider the beginning, middle and end of the story. How is this story reflected in our life today? Another way of getting to what script is may be to think about what we believe will happen when we are in old age. Do we believe we will be alive at 80 or 90 years old, be healthy, happy, and contented? What do we think will be on the headstone for our grave? What would we like to be on it? Transactional analysis - time structuring

The way in which we structure time is likely to reflect the different hungers. We all structure time in a variety of ways: Withdrawal Rituals Activities Games Intimacy Obtaining balance means ensuring that we have sufficient time for play and intimacy and if this does not occur then it would be beneficial to explore what we might be avoiding. Transactional analysis - games I am sure that every one of us must have been in the situation where we have said, "Why does this always keep happening to me" or "I always keep meeting people who hurt me and then go off and leave me". Sometimes it may be that we like to help people and then it goes wrong as the person we were trying to help says that we didn't do it well enough and that we got it wrong. We might think "Well, I was only trying to help" and feel got at. When similar situations keep happening over and over again then the term Transactional Analysis uses for this is a game. A game is a familiar pattern of behavior with a predictable outcome. Games are played outside Adult awareness and they are our best attempt to get our needs met - although of course we don't. Games are learned patterns of behavior, and most people play a small number of favorite games with a range of different people and in varying intensities. First Degree games are played in social circles generally lead to mild upsets not major traumas. Second Degree games occur when the stakes may be higher. This usually occurs in more intimate circles, and ends up with an even greater negative payoff. Third Degree games involve tissue damage and may end up in the jail, hospital or morgue. Chris Davidson (2002) has argued that world politics can involve fourth degree games where the outcomes involve whole communities, countries or even the world. Games vary in the length of time that passes while they are being played. Some can take seconds or minutes while others take weeks months or even years. People play games for these reasons: to structure time to acquire strokes to maintain the substitute feeling and the system of thinking, beliefs and actions that go with it to confirm parental injunctions and further the life script to maintain the person's life position by "proving" that self/others are not OK to provide a high level of stroke exchange while blocking intimacy and maintaining distance to make people predictable. Activity 2: Case Study on Transactional Analysis

Seema, Shanu and Rita are working together in an organization. Seema and Shanu were good friends. All three of them had a very healthy competition between them as they all were at the same level. Seema was very hard working, ambitious and responsible employee. Because of her hard work and good efforts, Seemas division had become the leader in the company and the upper management had praised her lavishly. She believed that with a good recommendation from Shanu, she would get a promotion. But unfortunately Rita received the promotion and moved to Topeka. Seema was shocked. It was bad that she did not get the promotion, but she could not stand the fact that Rita had been chosen over her. She and Shanu had been calling Rita Ms. Intolerable, because neither of them could stand her pompous arrogance. She felt that Rita being chosen was an insult to her. When the grapevine confirmed her suspicion that Shanu had strongly influenced the decision, she determined to reduce her interaction with Shanu to a bare minimum. Their relationship in the office was very chilly for almost a month. Shanu soon gave up trying to get in touch with Seema and they began communication became official. Finally William, their immediate boss, called the two for a meeting. William said, were going to sit here until you two become friends again. Seema resisted for a few minutes, denying that nothing had changed in their relationship, but when she saw that Wiiliam was serious, she finally said, Shanu seems more interested in dealing with Rita. Shanu could not say anything. William came to the rescue. William said that,Seema if youre upset about that promotion, you'd know that Shanu had nothing to do with it but praised you and kept pointing out how this division would suffer if we buried you in Topeka. With your bonuses you are making as much as Rita and if your work continues to be outstanding, youll be headed for much better place than Topeka. Embarrassed, Seema looked up at Shanu and apologized for treating her unfairly. The next day office was almost back to normal. Stages/ periods Ego States Strokes Games Interpersonal Communication

Before Adult EgoExpecting Promotion promotion.

Friendly, givinginformal & time to eachformal, face-toother, trust &face enjoy free timecommunication. together. Promotion Parent Did not getChilly No takes place Ego the environment ininterpersonal promotion. office, notcommunication. listening to Sharp. Cold warChild Ego Felt that wasCold war,Only work period betrayed byavoidance &related short Sharp. escape fromcommunication. confrontations.

Meeting Adult EgoCame to knowNew relationHealthy and the truth,have beenCommunication thereafter realized herestablished, re-established. mistake &more healthy & apologized. strong. Conclusion: Now with the help of Psychoanalytical theory i.e. Transactional Analysis, Seema can understand her difference in behavior in different situations and can improve those behaviors which are not fruitful in those situation. She can also use Interpersonal communication as to understand the person, real situation/conflicts better. She can apply both to understand others behavior so that she can negotiate with them easily and effectively. Activity 3: Psychometric test on Transactional Analysis Module 4 Activity 2: Psychometric test on Conflict Management Instructions: The proverbs listed below can be thought of as some of the different strategies for resolving conflict. Read each of the proverbs and using the following scale score how typical each is of your actions when in conflict. 1 - never do this, 2 - seldom do this, 3 - sometimes do this, 4 - frequently do this, 5 - usually do this
SCORE 1. It is easier to refrain than to retreat from a quarrel 2. If you cannot make a person think as you do, make him or her do as you think 3. Soft words win hard hearts 4. You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours 5. Come now and let us reason together 6. When two quarrel, the person who keeps silent first is the most praiseworthy 7. Might overcomes right 8. Smooth words make smooth ways 9. Better half a loaf than no bread at all 10. Truth lies in knowledge, not in majority opinion 11. He who fights and runs away lives to fight another day 12. He hath conquered well that hath made his enemies flee 13. Kill your enemies with kindness 14. A fair exchange brings no quarrel 15. No person has the final answer but every person has a piece to contribute 16. Stay away from people who disagree with you 17. Fields are won by those who believe in winning 18. Kind words are worth much and cost little 19. Tit for tat is fair play 20. Only the person who is willing to give up their monopoly on truth can profit from the truths that others hold 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20.

21. Avoid quarrelsome people as they will only make your life miserable 22. A person who will not flee will make others flee 23. Soft words ensure harmony 24. One gift for another makes good friends 25. Bring your conflicts into the open and face them directly; only then will the best solution be discovered 26. The best way of handling conflicts is to avoid them 27. Put your foot down where you mean to stand 28. Gentleness will triumph over anger 29. Getting part of what you want is better than not getting anything at all 30. Frankness, honesty and trust will move mountains 31. There is nothing so important you have to fight for it 32. There are two kinds of people in the world, the winners and the losers 33. When one hits you with a stone, hit him or her with a piece of cotton 34. When both give in halfway, a fair settlement is achieved 35. By digging and digging, the truth is discovered

21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35.

SCORING
Copy your scorings from the questionnaire into the table below. Total the columns. The higher the total score for each strategy, the more frequently you tend to use that approach.
WITHDRAWING FORCING SMOOTHING COMPROMISING CONFRONTING

1 6 11 16 21 26 31

2 7 12 17 22 27 32

3 8 13 18 23 28 33

4 9 14 19 24 29 34

5 10 15 20 25 30 35

TOTAL

TOTAL

TOTAL

TOTAL

TOTAL

Activity 3: Case study on Conflict management and decision making Food for the Children, an international NGO based in the UK, provides food grains and powdered milk to families where children are at risk of malnourishment or starvation. It has provided food to families in the small South Pacific Island nation of Papua Tuyua for the past eight years, utilizing the school system as the means of identifying needy children and distributing the food. The Minister of Education in Papua Tuyua has approved the involvement of the school system in this project, though each year the process of approval has become more cumbersome and drawn out. Sarah Britton has arrived from London for a one week visit as the representative from Food for the Children sent to negotiate the arrangement, and she quickly comes to the opinion that the Education Minister is delaying the process in hopes for a bribe. The local school officials are eager for the food supplies and assure Sarah that they can distribute the food on their own with or without the Ministers approval. Sarah sends an email to the executive committee in London requesting instructions on what she should do. The food has to be supplied within the next several days before the monsoons come. ROLE PLAY: You are members of the executive committee. What should Sarah do?

Module 5 Activity 1: Role Play A real life situation can be given to a group of students for role play. For example a conflicting situation between School canteen management and students about the quality of the food provided. Ask the students to divide themselves in two teams one representing the students and other representing the canteen management. Then direct them to come up with ideas that are helpful in win-win negotiation. Activity 2: Win- Win negotiation Notes attached

Activity 3: Discussion on how to give feedback after negotiation Aim: Having a colleague offer advice can be invaluable. If you're negotiating on your own, some aspects of feedback are not possible. We strongly urge you to have the discipline to review your own negotiations as a matter of good habit. It's no mistake that star athletes regularly review their own performance and set themselves goals. When successful enough, star athletes enjoy a coaches sage feedback. So who do you think would be your best negotiation coaches?

1. Give the feedback immediately after the negotiation has finished 2. People are not their behaviors! Describe what you have seen rather than labeling people as their behavior. 3. Get the negotiator to initially focus on what they have done well during the negotiation. Under no circumstances allow them to start to discuss the improvement areas or mistakes that they have made 4. Be specific - use specific examples of both dialogue and behavior to explain your points 5. Resist passing on your own style or prejudices explain what the current best practice thinking is - don't tell them how you would have handled the situation. 6. When you give the negotiator feedback on improvement areas, make sure this is phrased positively not you didn't do this very well but more like, you could improve this by. Constructive not destructive, is the golden rule when giving feedback. 7. There are three areas that need to be reviewed after most negotiations - the first is the behaviors during the negotiation, the second is the outcome of the negotiation, the third is the processes, tool sets, strategies and tactics employed.